#( im working on things and i am in the mood for shenanigans )

[ayahimes]

❛ the buttons to your ... ❜ a pause as she turns away and closes her eyes . it was rude to stare . ❛ your top . ❜ she swallows thickly , a wavering in her voice . ❛ they're open . ❜

[newtkive]

shift shenanigans - s1 social media au

note: jus for fun ! may or may not do more parts.

warnings: crude humor, slightly offensive jokes from richie sry

part two

liked by syd_adamu, marcus.brooks11 and 30 others

chefboyardee: my friends! i love my friends! the two on the right more than the left (i’m joking i promise) 😁😁😁😁

see all 8 comments

syd_adamu: brave of you to call him your friend y/n

↳ chefboyardee: boss man carmy save me

↳ syd_adamu: oh.. :///

marcus.brooks11: you did me so dirty, friend.

↳ chefboyardee: love you marcus you look spectacular

↳ marcus.brooks11: don’t start

richietheking: Where am I?

↳ chefboyardee: ya motha

liked by syd_adamu, chefboyardee and 10 others

richietheking: Getting sh$!t done.

see all 8 comments

marcus.brooks11: This is coolllddd.

↳ richietheking: You already know it man.

syd_adamu: this is actually crazy

carmyberzatto: can you show this on instagram? i think you should delete this.

↳ richietheking: Delete your life.

chefboyardee: come down to the beef for a number 6 the occy way 💯 the safest joint on the block 🤑💯we are 🔛🔝

↳ richietheking: Eyyy I know that’s right.

↳ carmyberzatto: please don’t advertise this.

WE HAVE THE BEEF 🥩

[ 8:25 am ]

y/n:

bruh im about to lose it. heads up when you guys get to work.

marcus: that catering order is about to be crazy

DO NOT REPLY: These white boards are stressing me out.

syd: we know, probably giving you ptsd from not finishing high school

DO NOT REPLY: Fuck you I did finish it.

y/n: oh i gotta change ur contact name richie

richie poo: ????? What

y/n: it was ���DO NOT REPLY’ lols

marcus: valid

syd: real

richie poo: What? Why?! That’s so rude

y/n: cuz you piss me off

and you kept blowing up my phone yesterday

richie poo: You weren’t answering, and we needed help at the cook out.

syd: the one where you poisoned everyone?

richie poo: Fuck off.

y/n: when i’m off work, i’m off work.

marcus: don’t let carmy hear that, y/n

y/n: don’t remind me

syd: he’s trying at least, go easy on him. he really has great ideas

richie poo: You mean you have great ideas in that little notebook

tina: Never trust a broad with a notebook.

syd: hey! i’m just being helpful

y/n: do you guys think my ig post will hurt carmys feelings

marcus: it would make me a little sad if i were him, but i don’t think he cares

y/n: great i’m gonna cry now

syd: i doubt he even saw it y/n it’s fine

richie poo: Check the work chat. Cousin is in a mood.

y/n: oh great

tina: Help us all.

syd: be nice you guys

WORK

[ 9:15 am ]

carmy: Everyone, we have huge catering orders tomorrow to prep for today. Please get here as soon as you can, the earlier you clock in the better. Additionally, please be careful what you post on social media. I don’t want people to get the wrong impression

y/n: yes chef 👨‍🍳

syd: ok sounds good

richie poo: Cool it, Cousin. What’s the issue with the social media

tina: I use FaceBook. That not allowed now??

carmy: Tina, you’re fine. I’m talking about those who post work things on public accounts

marcus: facebook is crazy

richie poo: I can’t go private

y/n: he needs the likes

richie poo: No I’m disabled from doing so. Not sure why

y/n: liar

richie poo: 😑I don’t like you

carmy: Then please don’t post pics of yourself posting up with a gun and an air horn outside of my shop anymore.

marcus: that pic was fire can’t lie

carmy: Well, it’s bad for business.

richie poo: Fine, whatever

y/n: carmy

carmy: What, Y/n?

y/n: is this because of my caption on my post i’m sorry i promise i wasn’t being for real

carmy: I don’t care Y/n.

y/n: is that code for ‘i care a lot and i’m crying in the office right now and that’s why the door is closed’

oh

syd: ? why the oh

y/n: he opened the door and yelled no 🤨 but i think i saw red eyes

carmy: Please get back to work and I’ll comp a meal for you later

y/n: OMG yes chef 😍

richie poo: Inappropriate emojis and you shouldn’t have to incentivize her to work

y/n: shut up acting like HR i’m gonna beat your ass

jealousy is ugly which is why you have that mug on your face

carmy: Stop

y/n: yes chef 👨‍🍳

i heard your giggle tho

richie poo: Again with the schizo episode

syd: you can’t say that richie

richie poo: Oh sorry

[redheadspark]

Hello! I am a creeper who LOVES your work! I have had this idea for an Az fic, but as I am not a writer, I cannot do it justic!

So its an Azriel x Reader. They both have a thing for each other but obvi neither know about it, but the whole Inner circle know . So the inner circle are having fun and some shenanigans happen, and somebody asks the reader about the person that she likes. Reader gets flustered, Az gets ✨jealous✨ and says screw it and kisses the reader. Im talking the kind of kiss that makes you forget everything and your brain melt. Lots of fluff, some angst because they are silly and maybe some smut at the end? 😎😎😎

Youre incredible!

Happy New Year!

A/N - HOORAY! I am so sorry for writing this BEYOND late, I'm battling a sinus infection and was in no mood to write when I was hurting, but I finally finished it and I hope you like it!

Intertwined

Warnings - Fluff with a some smut towards the end, so 18+ for this one!

“Okay, now that we have the presents out of the way, I think we should move onto a hot topic,”

“And what would that be?”

“A certain person’s love life,” 

You saw several pairs of eyes looking over at you as you were mid-sip with your glass of wine.  It suddenly felt like you were the topic of conversation, much to your dismay as you slowly lowered your wine glass down and stared at the others that were gazing at you.  As if you weren’t in on the joke.  Perhaps you weren’t, and clutching your wine glass a bit too tightly you looked to your right to see Nesta grinning at you.

“Nesta…..what’s going on?” You asked her tentatively as she linked arms with you.

“Nothing at all,” She replied smoothly as she gave you her signature smirk, “We are just inquiring about your personal life since you never tell us, your friends and found family, anything about your love life,”  

Of course, this was not how the night was going to go.  It was the Annual Winter Solstice Party amongst the Inner Circle in Velaris, the second one you have been a part of since you were the newest member of the Inner Circle.  Nesta became fast friends with you when she walked into your little bookstore, striking up a conversation with you about new books that caught her attention.  

You showed her a few titles, and you two have been friends ever since. 

After Nesta came her mate Cassian, the suave and yet kind Commander of the Illyrian Army.  He was dragged in by his mate, amused at the sight of Nesta almost sprinting to the New Arrivals section and he hung back and started a conversation with you.  You liked his attitude, the calm to Nesta’s storm, the sun to her moodiness, and he almost seemed like a lovable younger brother to you.  

Not too long after that, you were surprised to see Nesta again, but she was not alone.  She brought along both the High Lord and the High Lady of Night Court.  It never occurred to you that she was sisters with High Lady Feyre, to which you were beyond entranced to meet her.  Feyre was beyond kind, wishing to find art books and some other novels for her.  High Lord Rhsyand was more curious about the historical novels you had, along with adventurous fiction pieces to help him pass the time.  

You gave him a great recommendation, and your life was forever changed.

Rhysand hired you to help fill his personal library with books from the bookstore, paying you handsomely for your assistance and recommendations.  You were shocked to see the mass sum he placed in your hands, to which you were able to not only get more books for the store but to get a bigger apartment for yourself since you were living in a cramped hole in the hall.  After stocking his library with novels and volumes in every genre that he could ever want, Rhysand kept you in the Inner Circle.  Being alone for some time and having to survive with no one to lean on, it felt surreal to have a new family.  

A support system, and lifelong friends, it overwhelmed your heart tenfold. 

Nesta brought you around the first Winter Solstice party with the Inner Circle, you were wearing a modest yet captivating dress.  You were beyond nervous to meet the rest of her friends, but Nesta reassured you that you were going to mesh well with the group.  So when you and Nesta walked in together and you saw the rest of the guests, you felt so small compared to the rest of the beings there.

Especially with Azriel, the Illyrian Spymaster.

He took your breath away from the moment you saw him perched by the fireplace.  He cool demeanor contrasted with the roaring fire, the brooding stare he had on his face, and even the small licks of shadows that were hovering against his body and his wings that were tucked tight against his backside.  Nesta spoke plenty about him and his duties for Night Court, Being the Spymaster of Rhysand and seeking out information from other courts.  To anyone else, he would be intimidating and almost frightening to gaze at.

But not to you, you weren’t frightened at all.

Nesta introduced you two, walking you over to him and saying your name to him.  He simply stared at you, you seeing the bright hazel eyes he had brightening from the cracking fire as he held out his hand for you to shake.  You took it instantly, feeling the warmth of his hand and the scars that were etched along his skin as well.  

“Pleasure to see you,” He said to you, his voice deep and soothing like a balm against a fresh wound.  It felt it along your own skin, the tremor of his tone and how he was gazing at you with both intrigue and interest.  You couldn’t help but smile, something inside of you told you not to be afraid of him.  No matter that he could be a killer or someone who brings torture.  That’s not what you felt in that moment shaking his hand, and you always relied on your intuition in the past. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you too,” You said to him, and you saw him smile.  It was the most beautiful smile you have ever seen from another being in your life.

Since then, you have been taken by him.  The way he walked into a room and was cool and collected, how he would conduct himself in conversation and with the others in the Inner Circle.  Although you never saw with your own eyes how he would conduct himself in meetings or during his missions, you knew he was someone not to be trifled with.  But then again, anytime you two were in the same room, he showed none of those. 

He was introverted at best, willing to watch from a distance as the rest of the group would joke and chit-chat.  But he was also consistent in his opinions and banter with Rhysand and Cassian, showing the long relationship he has had with them.  You admired it all the more, seeing the love they shared for one another, not to mention the kindness that was laced with his stubbornness and determination.  

Something drew you to him, like a moth to a flame, wishing to discover him more and more as you two became friends over time. He never minded talking with you, wishing to know more about your knowledge of books and history and even coming to your shop every once in awhile to purchase something for himself.  He looked over very book that intrigued him, taking his time with the purchase that he wanted to do.  It showed that he was not going to waste his time in anything he did, he took precision and never jumped to chance.

Another trait that drew you in more with Azriel was his attention to detail.  He could analyze a person for a certain amount of time and get more information about them than anyone else can do.  It was a true gift, one you wish you had since his ability was more advanced.  He knew the precise information to give to Rhysand, the right paints to gift Feyre for her birthday, even the exact number of soldiers to tell Cassian in one of their Illryain training sessions.  It was his way in showing that he cared for the other person, listening to them and picking up and what they would say in passing.

He did that with you one time in the summer, hearing you talk with Mor about a broken window pane at the shop and some creaking floorboards that were on the verge of snapping.  You were mostly venting to her, knowing that you were going to have to fix it yourself since you weren’t going to overpay someone to fix it.  But the next morning, you heard Azriel knocking on your door with some tools in hand.  

“You don’t have to fix it for me, Azriel.  Honestly, I can—“

“It’s not trouble for me.  Better for you to be safe than an injury happening,”

He fixed the floorboards and the window pane within a few hours, you paying him with a homemade lunch and you two perched on the front porch of the bookstore gossiping about Cassian and Nesta’s upcoming wedding.  You hear him laugh from a comment you made, a whole-hearted laugh with his eyes crinkling and his teeth glistening in the sun, making you fall for him harder.

As the months passed, your friendship deepened and your crush on Azriel was still present, but it was placed on the back burner.  It felt like a fever dream for you to be on the same platform as him, only seeing yourself as a bookkeeper and nothing more important than that.  Azriel had power, he had a past of using that power on others to gain knowledge and intelligence.  His cool demeanor and uneasy stature would make others flee and run away, but you felt closer to him than anyone else in the Inner Circle.  Even with Nesta, who would tease you about how you two would be perfect together.  But of course, you would push those possibilities and dreams away with a wave of your hand.

“I don’t think he would be interested in someone like me,”

“Like who?!  Someone kind, intelligent, and beautiful from the inside out?  I think he would, and he would be a fool to think otherwise,”

Leave it to Nesta to build you up when you feel low.

This led you to this night, a snowstorm roaring outside the Townhouse while you were all sitting together in one of the casual sitting rooms.  With all eyes on you, you were still looking at the wine glass in hand as you were now the center of conversation.

“My love life is…..complicated to say the least,” you said aloud to the group, all of whom were simply smiling as you spoke again, “I am interested in someone, but nothing past that,”

“Oh, do tell!” Elaine said in glee as she was perched on a loveseat with her Mate, Lucien.  Feyre and Rhsyand too seemed interested, wrapped in each other’s arms while Cassian was grinning widely from his perch in an armchair.  You didn’t see Azriel, who was over on the other side of the room leaning against the wall, clutching his whiskey glass in a death grip as his hazel eyes were drilling into your own orbs.

“I doubt she wants to talk about it in a room filled with gossipers,” Cassian joked as Nesta glared at her mate.

“As if any of this will leave the Townhouse,” Feyre countered with him, though she gave you a knowing look, “You don’t need to tell us if you don’t want to.  I know how secretive you are,”

“Yes, she does!” Nesta said with a smirk as she clinked her wine glass with yours, “I know you far too well, and you are in need of some love in your life.  So tell us, what is he like?”

“Or she,” Rhysand hummed, though you rolled your eyes, “I’m only leaving it open, who are we to judge?”

“It is a male,” you corrected, seeing some smiles all around as you blushed.  Once again, without you knowing it, Azriel was standing so still as he was drinking in this information of you being smitten by someone else.  It was making his cool demeanor almost snap.  You had no idea that he was fuming inside, the thought of another capturing your heart and making you feel loved and adored, the notion that another could take you away from him and leave him high and cry.  

He was using all of his willpower to not stalk across the room to claim you as his, having months of practice in him pining over you and wishing you to be his.  

He found you infectious to his soul, whether it was your laugh or your smile that made your freckles pop and your face light up in joy.  He would find reasons to visit you at your little shop, just to talk to you for minutes at a time because it would fill up his soul with hope and love he missed out on for years.  Azriel thought of you as beautiful in both image and in heart, a shining ray of light in his dark world.  Yet he knew deep down he had to be careful, letting in people who were close to him would automatically link them to his dangerous life and his dangerous job.  The last thing he would ever want is to bring potential danger to someone he loved.  

It would kill him to bring you harm, the one person he would face danger for.

“All I will say is that this male is someone I feel will not wish to be with someone like me,” You said to the group with a shrug, Nesta rolling her eyes as Elaine looked at you almost in remorse.

“You speak so low of yourself!  You are far too beautiful and intelligent for any male to pass on,” Feyre reasoned with you as she smiled sweetly at you, “That male is a fool to pass you by,”

“You are a catch,” Cassian agreed, then throwing up his hands in defense, “And I say that as a friend!”

“And I agree with my mate,” Nesta said to you, “I find males who cannot make up their minds on what they want to be fools,”

“Babe,” Cassian sighed as she gave him a knowing look.

“You are no longer a fool, sweetheart,” She said to him as she winked at him before looking back at you, “Your heart is far too sweet and far too kind for any male, no matter how they are, to simply cast by.”

Perhaps it was the one thing that Azriel needed to hear, the one phrase that made him throw out the rational side that he was trying to hold onto.  The thought of some other male casting her side, or using her as a pawn in their game, it made his blood boil.  The affection he felt for you over the year grew day after day, and it got to the point of it coming to a head at any moment.  No matter the scenarios he played in his head in how he would ask you to dinner or to an outing in the park, nor the talks he confided in with Cassian in how he wished to talk to you about his affections for you.  All of that was out of the window.

He had to act, and he did just that.  

He moved before he could stop his feet, walking across the room with his eyes on you like you were a target for his mission.  Everyone was floored by how fast he was moving, you were almost spooked by the way he walked swiftly and his shadows were attempting to catch up to him.  He took your hand in his own, making you stand up from your spot on the loveseat and look at him with shock and worry.

“Azriel? What is—“ you were about to ask him.  But he instantly silenced you, reaching up to frame your jaw in his hand as he kissed you.

Nothing else mattered, everything ceased to exist, and you felt your heart bursting.

His lips, soft and yet firm in how he was kissing you, ingested a fire in you as you were still frozen in your spot and in his embrace.  The thoughts and daydreams of kissing Azriel were all out the window since this was real, breathing in his cologne and the scent that was etched on his skin and feeling his body temperature mingle with yours.  The way he kissed you was both gentle and possessive, maybe he was claiming you as his and at the same time wishing to show his affection to you.  Either way, you were filled with love with that simple kiss, filled to the point of almost overflowing, and then some.  

Before he could pull away, thinking he made a huge mistake in kissing you in front of all of your closest friends in such a brave declaration, you kissed him back.  He heard the others intake a short breath from the gesture, your fingers reaching up to touch the front of his shirt to feel his rapid heartbeat that was threatening to burst out of his body. His mind was on overdrive, not believing what was occurring.  You kissed him, and the gentle kiss against his lips unleashed a new sensation deep within him that he never felt for another.  Affection, protection, possession, and most importantly love.

He loved you.  Cauldron he loved you. 

It didn’t occur to either you or Azriel that the rest of the room was watching on bated breath, both in shock and in pure happiness as you two finally pulled away from one another and gazed at each other.  The realization of what happened sunk in, but in the best way possible.  There was a glow about the two of you, almost like a new shade of emotion over the pair of you like a blanket to shield you from the rest of the world.  Azriel smiled, in which you grinned in return as he laced your fingers together and gulped.

“Come with me,” he said, you nodding without you realizing it.  He then moved, having you follow him like a puppy as he led the two of you out towards the hallway.  Yet he looked over his shoulder at the rest of the group, all of whom were still looking in shock at what happened.

“Thank you for the party,” he said abruptly, and then you two walked into the darkness of the hallway before the faint sound of him winnowing was heard.  You both were gone in a second.

Silence was heard in the room, everyone looking at each other.  The only sound heard was the fireplace, but it only took a few solid seconds before Cassian gulped down the last of his whiskey and placed the glass on the mantelpiece.

“Fucking finally!” He said in a sigh of relief, the others grinning as Nesta shot up and glided over to her mate, “I swear to the Cauldron, It took too damn long for them to get together!”

“Aren’t they simply lovely together?” Elaine asked with a sweet grin to Lucien, who nodded at his mate in agreement, “They both deserve to be happy together!”

“It was getting them both to realize it that took too long,” Rhsyand snorted as Feyre slapped his arm, “What?  It’s true!  Cass and I had a running bet on how long it would take for them to get together.  Which reminds me, you owe me some money, Cassian!”

“Damnit,” Cassian groaned with a rub of his eyes with his fingers as Nesta grinned in victory.

“Well I am glad they finally realize they are meant to be together,” Nesta said with her smile, “Those two are meant to be.  I know they are.”

“To the lovebirds!” Rhsyand announced, raising his glass in the air as the others did as well, “And a life filled with happiness and love for the two souls who deserve it the most out of all of us!”

The group raised their glasses, knowing deep down, that your future together was bright and full.

“Here, for you,”

“Thank you,”  

You sat up in the bed, your bare body covered by the bedsheets as Azriel fell back into bed with you with no care of covering himself up while he handed you a plate filled with some fruits and crackers.  You were blushing like mad as he played kisses along your skin and shoulders, you giggled as he wrapped you in his arms.

“Are you going to let me eat?” You asked in a teasing tone, though he passed and stared lovingly at you.  Just being there, bare and glowing in both bliss and happiness after spending a few hours in pure pleasure and euphoria, it was all life-changing for him.  Even with his hair askew and a thin sheet of sweat on him, there was no sign of fatigue on him.  He was far too happy, too energetic even, to have another moment without you.  After a year of pinning over you and seeing you from an arms’ reach, he would never let you go from now on.  

“Are you willing to share?” He teased back, you rolling your eyes as he fed him a few grapes.  You loved seeing this side of Azriel, the playful and gentle side that you knew was buried deep down under his tough exterior.  But Hours before when he winnowed you both to the House of Wind, pressing you against the wall and kissing you deeply, you were unraveling with no sign of resistance.  If the kiss in front of the Inner Circle erased your mind, the kisses he gave you when you two alone erased your sanity.  He was possessive with his arms around you, his kisses along your neck, and your pulse racing.  

No longer were you two just friends, you both knew it.

He flipped your world upside down, it was no simple fuck.  No, with Azriel, he was precise in how he brought you pleasure and made you moan his name like a prayer.  From the way he undressed your and perched you on the edge of an ottoman at the foot of the bed, to the way he licked your folds with his wicked tongue and made you watch his lips and tongue get your beyond wet just for him.  You were on fire, chanting his name and tugging at his locks as his hands were bracing your hips to keep you still, even with your thighs perched on his shoulders and shaking in pleasure and madness.  

There was no daydream that you ever had that would compare to the real thing, even when you came in a shout and Azriel grinned against your now sensitive pussy before he ascended to stare at your blissed-out face. He kissed you softly, you trembling against his lips while your orgasm was slowly coming down, but you moaned once again as his fingers sunk into you.  It made you realize he was simply warming up, and the night was just getting started.

That night was the best night of your life.

“How long have you liked me?” You asked as he placed the now empty plate away and had you snuggle in his arms, you half on top of him as his fingers were tracing your bare back and along your spine.  He grinned at you, scanning your eyes and your messy hair.

“Since the moment Nesta introduced you to me,” He answered, you blushing like mad as he kissed the tip of your nose, “I knew then, even in that smile on yours, that there would be no one else for me in this life.”

“From a smile?” You asked.

“You can tell a lot from a person in how they smile,” Azriel explained, “Those who force a smile are not to be trusted.  But those who have a real smile, a kind smile, are those who can depend on in hard times.  Your smile entranced me, and I never wished to see another smile since it would never compare to yours,”

“Well, for me, it was when we shook hands,” You explained, reaching over to take his spare hand and lace your fingers together gently and look at the scars along his skin, “Your hands were warm, and you were gentle in shaking my hand.  I knew then, because of the warmth I sensed in you and the goodness you had in you.”

Even bathed in the moonlight, bare with no abandon, Azriel’s smile he gave to you was beyond beautiful.  Your love for him was shining bright no sign of darkness or blemish, it was making everything else in your life seem dull in comparison.  He made you feel loved, not just with the physical pleasure he gave you but the emotional too.  You knew he adored you, loved you beyond reason, and you were feeling just the same.  He would walk through fire for you, experience pain so you wouldn’t, and there would be no hesitance when It came to bringing you love.  All because you loved him for who he was and brought him pure joy.    

And as he sat up with you in his lap, guiding his cock into you to make you cling onto him and moan in bliss, you both knew there was no going back as your lives were forever intertwined.  

The End

[slashingdisneypasta]

You've been sending me perfect asks on my blog... So now I shall retaliate >:) (I know you probably know who this is, but I got too embarrassed to send this from my normal blog and I couldn't figure out how to switch blogs for asks 😅)

- Freddy lightly dragging his blades over your shoulders and back to get a reaction out of you. He can use his dream magic to control how sharp the blades are (I hope) so it can be completely safe texture play.

- (im mot sure exactly how you feel about Audrey... But i do know you like their voice~) Audrey II crooning and sweet talking to you while you're trying to do your work. They can't exactly sneak up behind you and whisper in your ear, but that doesn't mean they don't can't make you flustered with what they say.

- You're on a hunting trip with Jim Bickerman and whoever else is with him. You all settle down for the night, but there seems to not be enough tents for all of you. There's only one tent left, and you and Jim are the only ones who don't have one yet... And that old man is looking at you with that damn smirk of his, "Well, ain't this quite the predicament sweetheart~?"

- Being in a relationship with Wheezy and Greasy... And they both get ~in the mood~ at the same time. How would you go about this?

- Cruella designing specific outfits she wants to see you in, just for you... Including clothes to wear when you're supposed to be waiting for her~

I wanted to add more... But I ran out of ideas XD I hope you like these 😏 XD

AHHH! Yes!! I am so glad you have been enjoying my asks!! Their will be more!! And thankkkk you so much for these <3<3 I HAD to write some of them XDD Just like, excerpts ^^

Includes/Warnings:

Audrey II x Reader- Voice kink, sexual references, human/plant relations, manhandling, and someeee... touching. 🙃🙃🙃😅 (Not explicit)

Cruella De Vil x AFAB!Reader- ... you must know at this point I cannot hold myself back with Cruella XD 😅 So this one is explicit... It describes pictures she has drawn of you in those outifts... and in some particular positions.

Greasy Weasel x AFAB!Fem!Reader x Wheezy Weasel- Threesome!! Cunt eating (Greasy) and dirty talk/teasing (Wheezy). Also I think reader is in some sorta space. Tiny bit of a sharp teeth kink. R e a l l y explicit.

Jim Bickerman x Fem!Reader- Established relationship, semi-public sexual shenanigans, getting caught (Semi-explicit)

Audrey II:

"Y/N... " A vine moseys over to your desk after a short amount of silence and prods the squishy area of skin at your middle, and you respond by wrapping your arm around your tummy; Not looking over at the overgrown Venus fly trap. Not paying them any of the attention they crave. "baby... doll... watcha doin'?"

"Working, Audrey, shush." You keep your voice even, which you know will drive them crazy, and continue writing.

"Shu- Me?? Oh no, darlin', I don't think so!~ " The vine that poked at your tummy fat lifts towards your desk instead, then- but you push it away before he can snatch your homework away. They gasp. "Excuse me??"

"I'm really busy right now, I'll entertain you later."

For a moment they manage to stay quiet, but you can practically feel the cogs turning in their brain. You know your study time is not going to last long. "... Hmmm... " He hums, the sound sending a little shameful tingle all the way through you; Making you squeeze your eyes closed for a moment and cross one leg over the other, before refocusing on your work. No, no. The damn plant will not distract you today. You have got to get this essay done!! "I gotta say baby... I have to disagree with you~ "

"Good thing you don't get a say- " You're cut off when 4 vines wrap around the legs of your chair and suddenly tear you around to face him; dragging you closer and closer in the chair towards the corner Audrey lives in. Theirs a big smirk on the horrible fauna's huge mouth, and you know you have to get out now. Quickly you hop off the chair and rush back to your desk, gathering up your things in your arms. "Audrey, I'm just gonna go study at the library. I'll be back later toni- "

"Oh no no sweetheart~ Not so fast~ " Oh god, the way they call you sweetheart has you freezing totally still for a moment-

-And that, was all the time Audrey needed to wrap one of their thicker vines around your middle and slowly drag your body towards them this time; Causing you to drop some things, along the way. "Oh!- My stu- "

"Don't worry about it, baby! We're doin' something else, now~ Now c'mon... I wanna see you writhe... "Fuck. "... so go ahead and let go a' those books for me. Let go, baby... " You get the feeling he must mean to let go of more then just your books when he says it like that, but you refuse to let go of anything.

"Audrey, this is important." You beg, holding your books tight against your chest even as he tugs at them from the bottom. "I- "

"Don't you want me to be nice to you??... Y/N, I can be so goddamn nice... You don't know how nice~ I can be to you, yet... But I'll show ya!~ I'll show ya the ropes~ " At that, the vine around your waist shifts upwards a little bit, pulling up your shirt with it, and another vine curls into the waistband of your bottoms. "I can be your best friend, baby!"

Eyes wide, surprised at how this night is progressing and even more horrified that you don't want it to stop- not with Audrey talking to you like this- you let them steal your books and take them away. The huge, inhuman grin on Audrey's 'face' broadens, and that same vine comes back to wrap around your hair and hold it back from your face- and take control over your head. "Ah- "

"Don't worry baby. We're gonna have some fun tonight... just you and me... "

Cruella De Vil:

You hadn't seen this book, before. Which was odd, because Cruella often used the same brand for her sketches- always the same sleek, black leather binding and impossibly crisp paper you're cutting yourself on.

This one was no different. And she dropped it on your desk just the same as she always did, with enough force to send any loose papers flying so she could roll her eyes at you and complain that your desk is a disgusting mess as always. She even told you what you were to do with it, like you hadn't done it a million times before. Like you were unaware of the drill, even at this point. Because apparently you're an idiot.

It was all quite normal.

That is, until you opened the book so you could make copies of the sketches for manufacturing to keep. Until you looked at the new sketches.

Immediately you thrust the pages hard against your chest as fast as you can, dreading anyone else seeing what you just saw and looking around to make sure that you're alone in the room. Because- porn.

It was porn. There was no other way to describe it, from the... graphic positions the women were in, to the almost lack of clothes entirely. Being Cruella's assistant, you had seen plenty of lingerie sketches before, but they were usually tasteful! These... from what you saw before you hid them, they were just...

Obnoxiously horny.

Eyes wide and nervous, you slowly pull the book away from your chest to look again, so so curious despite your embarrassment and hot cheeks, and- yep. Definitely. Still porn. Cruella De Vil had sat in her glass office today looking oh so professional, and drawn porn.

... You cant stop looking at them. They're great, actually. You can feel your pussy throb, as your thumb runs over the center of a particularly well-done sketch; One where the woman is sat down with her knees spread wide and her head tuned away, eyes closed. Her cunt's open and shaded red, the only colour Cruella has added to the sharp, black-and-white pages.

You're so unbelievably hot at these pictures, just looking at them - distracted by particular parts of them, - , that at first you don't read the labelling at all. Cruella's handwriting in this book is all in cursive, and you have to focus to read it, but when you do begin to go through the notes... you feel yourself get even hotter.

Your name is all over the pages. Y/N in fur, written on top of a woman stood terribly naked, wearing just a fur hat and fur boots. Y/N in silk, written beside the woman with her beautiful red pussy bare on the page and a very shiny silk chemise bunched up around her hips. Y/N in chiffon, written beside a woman wearing just a long chiffon skirt and arms raised away from her confidently bare chest. Y/N in satin, written beside a woman with her hands on her hips, holding a long satin robe back from hiding her body- at all.

Y/N in- Y/N in- Y/N in-

After a while, and your eyes are the size of saucers while your underwear is absolutely soiled, you plop down finally in a chair by the photo copier and turn to the last page. Theirs a sticky note on it, but you peel it off in order to see the final picture, and give a choke gasp at the image Cruella's drawn for you.

An absolutely tasteless picture of a woman - you, - bent over a familiar desk, with your feet spread wide so your ass and cunt are on full display to anyone looking. The angle is from just above, as if you're standing just behind the woman - you, - and she's preparing to take you in. God, you can feel yourself clenching at the sight- the thought- the idea-

Is this what Cruella wants? Does she want you like this? Does she want to fuck you this badly??

As if as an after thought, you look at the sticky note.

Y/N,

My Office. Later tonight after everyone leaves.

Cruella De Vil

Greasy Weasel x Reader x Wheezy Weasel:

You were already with Greasy when Wheezy walked into the room, and he knew damn well what the two of you were up to- he always knew- he just doesn't always want to do it too. He doesn't have as big a drive as the two of you do.

But evidently today is one of the days where he does want to fuck, he is in the mood. This is evident when he walks in and locks the door behind him; not taking his cool eyes, dark with lust, on you with Greasy's mouth moving on- against- around your cunt.

Wheezy's eyes flicker up to your face, raising his brows- as if asking, if theirs room for one more.

You open your mouth to tell him yes, of course, but its Greasy who responds. He didn't see the question Wheezy silently posed, but he can tell since you're not freaking out that someone has come in right now, that it has to be your other boyfriend. He pops his mouth off of you, though he doesn't take his eyes off of it at all, mesmerised by what is definitely one of his favourite things in the world, and instead just moves to rub his thumb against your clit. "Welcome in, el fumador... help yourself~ we're just beginning here... "

... Wheezy smirks, rolling his sleeves up more securely and strolling over to the bed, leaning over you as you move your head to see him. He gives you a little hello kiss when you crane your neck back because he's right beside the bed now, and strokes your hair for a moment.... Then his eyes slide right back down to Greasy and what he's doing to you, and how slick you are, and a mischievous look that makes you even hornier flickers in his eyes. "Really, Grease? Looks like you've been workin' her for- damn. Hours, now. She looks like she's ready to pop."

"I'm just that good, I guess!~ "

"Mhm... "

Needy and non-verbal, you just reach for Wheezy's shirt collar and drag him back down to you and your parted lips as Greasy connects his mouth to you once again; Slipping your tongue immediately into his mouth while your other boyfriend devours your cunt like his favourite meal. You kiss Wheezy with all the want you're feeling, meshing your mouths together slowly but licking his tongue so dirty you would feel embarrassed, if you weren't so close. He reciprocates, easily giving you what you want, taking care of his needy, desperate girl without even touching you anywhere inappropriate.

He pulls away too soon, and you let out a sad little whine, as he brushes a thumb over your lips and gives a smokey chuckle. He's still so close! Why is he doing this?- "Its okay, baby, its alright... we're gonna take care of you... "

"Please- "

"Y'feel Grease down there?? Does that feel good?" Quickly you nod, your fingers still curled around Wheezy's collar. It feels really, really good- his tongue is so deep- "Make sure y'tell him how good he's doing, cutie, he deserves some praise dontcha think??"

Eyes wide, you nod again. Greasy does deserve it. "Its so- so good- "

"Hear that Grease?? So, so good... "

Greasy moans and nods into your most private place and it has you bucking, slapping a hand over your mouth to keep from making a terribly load sound- which just makes him chuckle against you, sharp teeth brushing against your delicate skin.

"Now... lay down, baby. I need a little something, too today. Its been a hard week... " Your eyes slip downwards towards Wheezy's hands as he unbuckles his belt, causing your mouth to actually water. "... and you wanna help me out, dontcha? Yeahhh, I know you do... you're a good baby... " As you nod once again, eager to please, Wheezy gives another smirk; looking down to Greasy. "Isn't she, Grease?"

In responce, Greasy shows you both as he shoves his hand down in his own pants.

Jim Bickerman x Reader:

To your credit, you did try to keep it to a goodnight kiss tonight.

... The key word being try. When you noticed him watching you in that way that reminds you he's a hunter while you were just getting comfy in your sleeping bag, you had asked him what? And when he had acted all innocent like he hadn't been practically licking his chops at you, you explained that you were not having sex in this tent tonight because a. the tent is not sound proof and b. it was inappropriate. The poor men you're camping with did not need to experience that.

And you didn't need to be looking them in the eyes the next day knowing that they are now privy the sound you make when the creepy old man hits that particular spot deep inside you, to be frank.

You even said goodnight, and held the sleeping bag over your head.

But fuckkkkkkkkk you cant help yourself. You're almost as bad as Jim is- actually, scratch that almost. You are as bad. That's why he's so perfect.

All of 2 minutes later, you were giving a groan at your own lack of self control (You've really got to work on that), crawling out of your sleeping bag (Pulling the flannel Jim leant you, or you stole from him, tight around you to shield you from the cold), and finding yourself straddling him. From below he gives a smirk, about to say something like I told you so, or I thought so, or ha ha- but you just silently shake your head at him and lean down to kiss him. Like no- nope. No gloating. If you gloat sir, you die.

For a while its just kissing, his beard rubbing against your face and the brim of his hat grinding into your forehead until you take it off him- chucking to an unknown corner of the tent. This makes him chuckle, as you release his mouth to breath and give him a bemused grin, nose scrunched up slightly at him, before pressing a quick kiss to his cheek and then his clothed shoulder.

He curls his fingers into the loops in your jeans - you hadn't bothered to get changed to go to sleep, it was way too cold, - and tugged your hips against his. "Mmm... I can feel you all hot and throbbing, sweetheart... somethin' you wanna tell me? Maybe you don't think this is so inappropriate??... " When you lift yourself up to give him a deadpanned look, his eyes light up very purposefully and he makes 'oh' sound. "Orr, maybe you like that... "

You just hold up a finger, like quiet, before kissing him again. This time he doesn't let that be it, disconnecting his mouth from yours way too soon in favour of leaning up a little whispering in your ear. "Your mess in your pants is distractin' me. I'm gonna need you to take them off... "

"Hm~" You hum, leaving him and standing up the best you can in the small tent to wriggle out of your jeans, kicking them off into the same corner his hat went so you're left in your shirt and Jim's blue flannel. Jim eagerly undoes his own pants then, too, so when you lower yourself back onto him you can easily access the poor man's painfully hard cock, sitting hot and impatient underneath you, behind cotton boxers. Wow, you think vaguely. He can sure hold himself together well- you didn't think he needed you this badly!! You might have taken mercy on him sooner if you'd known... Well- "... Do you have- "

Before you can even finish the sentence, he's offering you a condom from who-knows-where. It makes you snort as you accept it. "What a gentleman... "

"I do try, pumpkin."

"Okay," You grin, shaking your head and trying to go back to that quiet, purposeful mood from before despite Jim making you smile. "Okay- we doing this?" You're still giggling a little, the heat of the moment and the middle-of-the-night sillies getting to you now. "G'head then, whip it out- "

Suddenly you're cut off- and its not by Jim, or your own giggling. Its by someone outside the tent- "PLEASE, don't!!" They yell suddenly, followed by a couple of others voicing their agreement with grunts and pleases and one particularly pained jesus christ jim, let us sleep!! He sounded like he was in the tent right next door.

"... Oh god- " You start, face heated up like a stove as you pull part of the flannel up to cover your face some, half laughing still from the night-time hysteria and this ridiculous situation, and looking down to connect eyes with Jim.

He looks like he's about to lose his composure, too, and then someone's shoe gets thrown at the side of your tent and you both burst out laughing.

(Annnnnd thank goodness this is finally done- I can go read your Scroop Headcanons now XD)

[student-in-nightraven]

hii, could i rq a matchup with anyone from obey me, twst or kamisama kiss? ☆⌒ヽ(*'､^*)

im a bi girl, 5'3, intp-t 4w5 + aquarius, id say im some kind of ambiverted like 60% awkward-reserved-anti-social introvert and 40% chaotic, rambly, all over the place, once i start i dont stop extrovert?? depends on my mood i think (˘∀˘) for some random traits i'm erratic, eccentric, conscientious, creative, empathetic, unserious, sarcastic, not a team player and definitely come across as strange to literally anyone not used to me

hmmmm some hobbies i have are baking, writing, editing and arts + crafts (drawing, painting, making my own random stuff like candles, soap, stickers) - very practical very fun 🧝‍♀️ i also like gaming when i have time which is basically always bc im lazy and hate work, i leave everything last minute and procrastinate so much bc i and i'd rather be doing what i want instead of boring stuff 😒👎 it all ends up rushed and low effort unless im passionate abt it. probably why i'm also never on time but that's also bc i love sleeping

if i had to pick a label for whatever my style's supposed to be {bc i just dress in whatever looks good tbh} i'd say a hybrid of grunge and indie maybe💪😘 i take pride in my dress sense actually i think its gojus (μ_μ)

i have collections/mini collections of a couple things - plushies, crystals, stickers, bracelets and i keep anything and everything people might give me, i've done it as long as i can remember, like not even gifts just if someone gives me a rock or a piece of stationery or origami etc it'll be in my possession forever i'm too sentimental to get rid of anything, i have so much scattered everywhere it's unfunny 🧍‍♀️ i think my love languages are physical affection bc i love closeness altho im crap with emotional stuff but words of affirmation and mushy fluffy stuff can be pretty neat {even if it's embarrassing and awkward xox} + gifts bc i love buying myself stuff and receiving presents, i also like giving them but i feel like i'm spending too little or too much or compare it to what they give back to me and feel like it's not good enough or what they'd want bc i'm usually either too stingy or spend too much and think too much + feel bad when it feels like i don't give back to people as much as they give to me in any sense?? | (• -•)|

i love purple, literature, rock/pop/dance/techno music, space, halloween, history, things that smell nice/scented stuff, philosophy, nature, horror, psychology, fantasy, sweet/sour/salty foods, and animals {especially my bunnies ofc, my pride and joy <3} so im working towards becoming a vet bc im good w science and i'd definitely rather look after them than humans bc i am not a people person i'd fail miserably xox

i don't like ppl who are ignorant or inconsiderate bc they're annoying and punchable, my family, the ocean bc it's scary and doing embarrassing stuff which tbh is basically everything smh

anyways i tried to condense whatever i could think of LMAO but i cba to do anymore 💀💌 thank u!!

The Kamisama requests always make me happy:')

I match you with..

..

...Mizuki!

The most gentle and sweet lover in the whole world.

He matches you like CRAZY, soulmates real;

Loves being chaotic with you, getting caught up in shenanigans and being lovey dovey with you;

He just randomly snuggles up to you whether it's in his snake form or human form, if snake form let's out occasional cute bloops that you die for, he also does the cute snake yawn, he knows it's cute and he's doing it on PURPOSE;

I hc that mizuki is great at portraits and has painting sessions with you in which you 2 paint in peace and show eachother the piece;

You teach him how to properly bake so that he doesn't drop lizards in almost everything you bake-

"but-but it's for good luck:("

"Mizuki, no"

He encourages you not wanting to work and lazes off with you, if for no reason Tomoe comes over he annoyingly comments on how as your familiar mizuki shouldn't encourage this but who listens to him;

Spends mornings sleeping in with you, if you have to go to school he'll just transform into his snake form and accompany you there!

Loves your collection of crystals and other things, so he finds the most beautiful crystals just for you♡

Loves your bunnies and cradles them in his hands, your basically a family, your bunnies have a dad now;

So in all he's the perfect match for you, the most peaceful and loveable relationship ♡⁠˖

Thank you for the request dear annon! May you have a wonderful week<3

[clippedwingsmuses]

ooc: good morning, no icon bc i am. guh. i am so tired rn, but i had to give yall a psa update about stuff going on with me (since i just got back from my doc appointment)

basic tldr; my activity is most likely going to be even more sparse than it is for a while because i'm focused on my mental and physical health (working on regulating my bipolar disorder primarily), as well as some legal issues that i need to address; what activity i do have may be restricted to my current threads and i might not be making ooc update posts very frequently

full information (and miscellaneous ramble-venting) is under the cut

active muse check: surge, laurance, wanderer, kieran

(cw: mental health, general medical and legal talks, venting)

ooc: so breaking news, apparently it turns out my bipolar disorder might be the more major diagnosis between everything that i got checked out a couple weeks ago, i got prescribed some mood stabilizers so i should be getting them in tomorrow

im having to re-set up my insurance bc they fucked me over and cancelled it (we didn't get any of the documents that they were supposed to be giving us, and my acc on their website can prove we didn't receive them) so that's stressing me out

i also had to get bloodwork done today for whatever reason, going there and doing the bloodwork is what gave us the heads up that my insurance was cancelled so i guess i'm glad for it, but also we can't really afford to pay for the bloodwork rn (and barely if at all); i'm glad that i got it done so i can see if i have any physical issues to worry about, but at the same time that payment is gonna fuck us over for a little, cause we barely get by as it is

im also cramping which sucks!!!!! but that's small beans compared to everything else

i mean today already started off pretty shit for me, i only got about 4 hours of sleep cause my anxiety kept me up most of the night (who was surprised that would happen? not me) since i was stressing about the appointment (they're also still ignoring the potential that i could be neurodivergent, and i know damn well that i am, they just keep blaming my issues on everything else that's wrong with me, so that's stressing me out to a pretty strong degree too)

so yeah, considering all my mental health issues and the doctors visits ive basically been having nonstop for the last couple of weeks, my activity on this account is probably going to be even less than it already is; i've just got too much going on to put all my energy into fixating on writing, and even writing my novel is a chore that i've really had to trudge through the mud to finish (i'm still not even done with it)

i will still be around to write on here ofc, but i might restrict myself into not actively searching for any new rp partners for a while; i'm going to try spending my time relaxing and getting my shit sorted before i fully commit to being here as much as i have been. again, activity will still be here all things considered, but i might not be making very many ooc posts like i have been, and as far as dash shenanigans go i might be pretty quiet

my discord is open to mutuals if anyone wants to chat or discuss plots, and my ims on here will always be open as well

sorry for rambling and bitching so much on here i just like to keep yall informed, but yeah the tldr at the top basically explains all the important details outside of my rambling

[seasonal-writes]

im not kidding i was in a rancher mood as i usually am and went to go re read chapter 10 so i opened AO3 and saw that you posted chapter 11, i was like omggg!!!!

what if we were both princes who were on the run together and started to develop feelings for each other 👉👈🥺

literally such a cute chapter, loved the horse shenanigans. i am obsessed with the image of a cute little tango wrapped up in cloak by the fire. as always amazing writing, im gonna go re read this chapter a couple more times now.

- (:

EUEUE ;-; smILEY ANON you always say such SWEET THINGS ABOUT THE NEW CHAPTERS, THANK YOU!! i'm so glad i happened to upload while you were going to revisit chapter ten!! :D funny how that worked out. my boys. they are. hopeless. and it's very funny. SO glad you enjoyed the chapter, thank you so much for reading and keeping up with the story<333

[straight-into-the-animus]

i did this a long time ago but cant find the post so i am once again putting out there my ideas for a dirty dancing french fryes au thing bc im in a patrick swayze mood and it is The Movie of all time

Arno is visiting with his now adopted family the De la Serres to some posh resort for one last family vacation before Arno’s sister Elise goes off to college and Arno tries to find something to do with his life (he doesn’t get involved with much, still sort of salty and quiet after the death of his father) 

And through some shenanigans he meets Jacob Frye, who performs at the resort as one of the top dancers, mainly with his sister Evie. The problem is that Evie sprains her ankle and is in no condition to dance for the rest of the season (which is fine with her bc it just means she gets the attention of the resort’s doctor Henry Green, but that’s besides the point). 

Arno feels somewhat guilty since he was somehow involved and offers to be Jacob’s partner since that’s a pretty hot thing with some people and they could maybe branch out into a few more markets more than the siblings could. Jacob is initially resentful of the pretty upper class boy but they have a mutual understanding and that summer is filled with romance as they overcome their differences with the help of Evie and Elise and put on one hell of a performance/coming out party and Jacob and Arno continue to work together.

[jemmo]

hi! i really liked the bad buddy fics u recommended last time to another anon, do u have any new ones that you’d like to recommend?

oooooh yay im glad ppl are enjoying my fic recs 😊😊 i'd like to think of myself as a connoisseur of the bad buddy ao3 tag (although yes sometimes i do just check the explicit tag... im only human) so here's some i've enjoyed in the past couple of weeks

music is not in the notes, but in the silence between them by seekingmoonscapes (@seeking-moonscapes on tumblr)

omg this one is a gemmmmm. i havent resonated with many chaptered fics so far but this one im so so invested in. the storytelling is beautiful and there's such a good balance of moods and tones between the scenes. and they're just adorable in this fic i teared up an embarassing amount reading the last chapter with all the guitar stuff. kayla you've officially ruined me and pls know i have a tab open for this fic that i check everyday waiting for chapter 6 (no pressure lol)

(i had this half written in my drafts when chapter 6 dropped and eeeeeeeek kayla my hero thank you that final chapter was so fucking cute. i love that it was like a who’s who of all of pat and prans cutest moments and all their confessions all packed into one it was genius. and now im gonna need approximately a billion special chapters and side stories. dont worry, i’ll be patient)

no stranger to the wind by snickerdoodlles (@thecookiemonster77 on tumblr)

its no surprise at this point that i praise everything you write then. but the people need to know there are so many good AUs brewing im constantly vibrating with excitement. and i cant wait to get more gems of this chrestomanci AU bc the patpran junior dynamic is beyond precious and i cant wait to see my boys being all powerful enchanters that live their own quaint, quirky lives according to their own rules (+ beach shenanigans my beloved)

I’ll pretend that I’m not hurt by cherrylipgloss (@prany on tumblr)

its not that i want to see pat and pran fight, but some delicious jealousy and angst followed by a heart-warming reconciliation sits on my palette just right. and i am so so in love with the fact that we got to see this from both perspectives bc both of their pettiness and insecurity and sadness is valid and we get to see that, and we get to see how each others actions get misinterpreted and thats how these things happen. i just beyond love this fic bc patpran ldr angst done right is 👌👌👌

and now the spicy stuff 🤤

i am weak, my love, and i am wanting by kurtstiel (@winxteam on tumblr)

wow wow wow this fic is everything. idk what else to say, this just hits right for me. its my favourite thing, that soft level of kink that has a whole world of emotions tucked into it, its like crack to my brain. and this was just beautiful, stunning, gorgeous, its such a horny emo mood and the sheer level of pat neediness was fantastic. honest to god one of the best explicit bad buddy fics ive read so far

One Night Stand With Your Childhood Crush by xxxbucky

this is like all the horny crack shenanigans i’ve ever needed. like yes give me awkward happenings and supressed feelings and embarrassment, and this so so has to continue bc i need office happenings and forced working together and all the awkward eye contact and prolonged stares and wanting but unsureness ugh this just be my jam

and just as a lil special, here is the trifecta of pat and pran phone sex shenanigans:

a ghost upon the air by  RyNSFW (pugglemuggle) (@rythyme on tumblr)

Your Voice in My Ear (Your Space in My Bed) by Faillen (@faillen on tumblr)

Awkward by seekingmoonscapes (@seeking-moonscapes on tumblr)

[mousieta]

2022 Drama Rankings: Dropped Shows

Bulgasal

Year: 2022 Country: Korea Platform: Netflix Episodes watched: 2/16 I so wanted to like this one, I was quite excited for the cast as I enjoy Lee Jin Wook, Kwon Na Ra and Lee Joon quite a bit in other shows. The premise, also, felt very Guardian-esq in a good way. I enjoy a good immortal series and Korean fantasy with a dark gritty edge? Yes, sign me up.

Unfortunately I could never get past the first two episodes. It fell victim to the trap that immediately kills my desire to continue watching a show: I started rewriting the whole thing *as* I was watching it (at least with Love in the Air the rewriting didn’t start for me until I’d seen the whole thing). But once my writer brain kicks in to redo it all, the show is done for me, its no longer fun, it is work and frustration.

I just didn’t care for the writerly choices as they felt poor and led to the overall tone of those first two episodes being very flat, emotionally. I just didn’t care about any character enough to make the flaws worth it.

Business Proposal

Year: 2022 Country: Korea Platform: Netflix Episodes Watched: 2/12 This was sharp and slick, and very cute. I made it, again, through about two episodes before I realized I just didn’t care enough to keep going. The cute felt a little too much, as though the show were depending on that and its bag of tropes rather than believable characterizations and moving plots.

The writing of what I saw seemed fine, the acting was fine, the directing was a little to into itself but it was fine. Fine, fine, fine, and in a lineup of much more compelling shows, I just didn’t feel like spending my time with fine.

F4 Boys over Flowers

Year: 2022 Country: Korea Platform: Netflix Episodes Watched: 3/16 I think I may just be Boys Over Flowersed out, y’all. Again, like Business Proposal, it was cute and fine. I made it through three episodes and just kept forgetting to watch more. I guess I don’t love BrightWin enough to watch heterosexual shenanigans.

The casting seemed spot on and I love that Thailand now has their own version which seemed to do well. I have the Korean version which was my first and the Chinese version which is my favorite and I think that’s enough F4 for me.

The Wind Blows from Longxi

Year: 2022 Country: China Platform: Viki Episodes Watched: 9/24 Of all the shows on this list - and maybe any other on my Dropped list this one and the next make me the saddest. I got quite far as well, nearly halfway. On paper, this has everything I need. The writing is good and intense with layers of conflict and constant guessing at the twists and turns of the plot. It is slick and well-directed and the acting is phenomenal. It also has a delicious staple: a tense and fraught m/m love/betrayal dynamic. This should have been catnip but for some reason I was  always either too mentally tired to engage, or would get distracted watching other things. Dropping this was definitely an ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ thing. Hopefully, someday I’ll have the capacity for it because I think it would be an excellent and captivating binge watch.

Heroes

Year: 2022 Country: China Platform: YouTube Episodes Watched: 19/38 This is another one that dropping made me sad. It was delightful and has Baron Chen!! An OT3 Romance! Delightful DMBJ connections!! All I can say is what did it in for me was likely the platform. I don’t have the fancy YouTube so watching commercials made it impossible for my ADHD brain to keep focused on an episode, I kept getting lost in the plot (which isn’t why I was bothering to watch but would have been nice to follow) Now that it is on Viki I might give it another go when I’m in the right mood.

Strangers from Hell

Year: 2019 Country: Korea Platform: Netflix Episodes Watched: 5/10 This was so, so good. Amazing. Gripping. Twisted. Lee Dong Wook was terrifying and compelling, Im Si Wan was as good as he ever is. Everything about this was good. I am just a great big old scaredy-pants who cannot tolerate anything suspensful or scary (I never have been able to).

I did my best: I only watched on brightly lit weekends in the middle of the day, and only one episode at a time. With those restrictions I managed to make it to episode 5 before I just couldn’t take it anymore. Highly recommend if psychological horror is your jam, you will be very pleased with it, I think. I just…can’t watch anymore. Dong Wook I still love you though! I just love sleeping through the night more.

2022 Drama Reviews Masterlist

[countlessrealities]

GENERAL ROLEPLAY STYLE & PREFERENCES

BOLD : applies to you.  ITALICS : only applies to you sometimes. STRIKETHROUGH : does not apply to you. Elaborate on any points you’d like with an *

TYPES OF ROLEPLAY / HOW I DO THREADS: i don’t. i just do whatever is on my dash when i’m online. mainly asks. i do little short things mostly. i do my threads on discord. long - running threads that slowly build upon the muses.

PLOTTING PREFERENCES: wing it. get a general idea ooc, run with it and plot further if need be. long expansive thought out arcs.*** My preference is for plotted threads. I work much better if I have a general idea of the plot, so I tend to ask for at least that when starting to write with someone (even more if we haven’t written before). I love building verses too, so with my closest partners I usually also discuss possible arcs and stuff. Unplotted stuff is usually reserved for random, short-term interactions (mostly with mutuals I’ve been writing with for a while, so even those are usually inserted in the context of a verse we’ve been building up)

TYPES OF THREADS I DO / PREFER: one - liners only. whatever dash shenanigans i’m online for. para or multi - para. literal novels.*** I’m a descriptive writer, so all my answers tend to be multi-para / novella long. Shorter and para replies are reserved for casual / short-term interactions. I never do one-liners.

REPLY SPEED FOR THREADS AND CONSISTENCY KEEPING THREADS: i lose threads all the time and usually get back to them. i tend to lose threads but please tell me if i have and i’ll reply. i drop threads pretty quickly. i’m really slow but i will get back to you. i reply on a schedule / queue. i usually reply within a week. i reply every day. i reply almost instantly. *** I’m a slow replier, but I never drop a thread without warning my partners first (the only exceptions are Tumblr messing my notifications up and technical problems with the tracker). Also, if a thread is inactive for more than three months (meaning I don’t get an answer for that long and don’t hear from the mun OOC), I tend to consider it dropped.

ROMANTIC OR SEXUAL SHIPS: i don’t do these ships. i’m not against them happening but it is not the main point of my blog. ships will have to be discussed a lot ooc. super chemistry based. i love doing ships, hmu i probably already ship it so just ask. i ship really quickly. autoship or ship within a few interactions. i mainly rp for the cute ship fluff or angsty smut.*** As a fan, I’m a shipper at heart and I absolutely love shipping, but as a RPer I’m much more selective. I require chemistry between the muses first and foremost and some level of OOC communication with my partners as well.

SMUT: i do not do smut at all. i’m very selective about it. i only do it on a separate blog / on discord. i mainly only do asks relating to nsfw headcanons on sundays. i write it a medium amount. i write it all the time and love to. i am comfortable with foreplay and fade - to - blacks but nothing further.*** I’m open to writing sexual stuff, even if I’m very selective about it. I usually write it only with people I’m comfortable with and with whom I have a good level of OOC communication. Also, I must be in the right mood to write smut, so replies to that sort of threads can get very slow if I’m not in the right mindscape (or I could ask my partner if we can just drop it and move on if it drags out for too long)

ACTIVE HOURS: mornings, 8 – 10. midday, 11 – 1. afternoon, 2 – 5. evenings, 6 – 8. night, 9 – 12. ungodly hours of the day, 1 – onwards. *** I’m usually active in the evening because I’m busy IRL during the day. You can find me in my IMs or on Discord, but replies are usually written at night. During the holidays, ungodly hours tend to happen often xD

ACTIVITY SCHEDULE: super slow and sporadic, like once a month or so. slow and sporadic, week - long gaps between activity. bi - weekly ish. weekly activity. daily activity. i’m online nearly all the time.*** Replies usually take between one and three weeks, sometimes longer. I’m online almost every day (mostly on mobile) and when I can I tend to check Tumblr.

STARTERS: i don’t do starter calls. i want to do starter calls but often don’t have time. i do selective calls. i don’t do calls but always feel free to ask me for one. i post calls rarely, regularly, often.

AUS: i don’t do aus. my blog is an au but outside of that i don’t do them. i sometimes do them but only with a lot of plotting. i have a couple of aus already, feel free to request them. i have aus coming out of my ears, please interact with them. i love making aus, hmu to plot if you think of one. there are some aus i won’t do.

CROSSOVERS: i don’t do crossovers. i’m selective with crossovers.i love crossovers.*** Nowadays a great part of my RPs are crossovers or fusion AUs, so never fear to come and talk me about them!

[fandom-blackhole]

I'm back from my mandatory two day socialization recovery period required for all socialization even if I enjoy it. It's time for some Mermaid!Din au thoughts (No thots unfortunately but we'll live)

First off I love the isolation that the reader faces because of the lighthouse they live in. And I love how the townspeople being nice to the reader help give them a reason to stick around when weird things start happening.

I love how it took months before anything strange starts happening, like were Din and Grogu just not around or were they observing the reader. Did Din ever try to stop Grogu from damaging the lighthouse or did he let the little rascal do as he pleased.

· And gosh I love the idea of reader dressing in old worn clothing, a knit sweater with fraying sleeves, sweat pants covered in paint from repairs, an old windbreaker to help keep the cold out. It makes me heart all warm and fuzzy.

Edna, who i've head cannoned as this series Miss Chatham (H2O: just add water charter) is honestly life goals. Like live near ocean - check(ish), have rare knowledge that can be used to help new person - check, being just slightly spooky -amazing. And is that a little matchmaker I see her playing? I love it.

Then Grogu being injured :( I bet that Din is absolutely being eaten alive by guilt even though we all know it’s not his fault and he does literally anything he can to keep Grogu safe and happy.

And In love how Din is venerable enough to ask for help, like he recognizes that this is something out of his area of expertise so he goes to the person he knows is “safe” to get help. He’s humble enough to admit that he needs help and is not capable of doing everything for Grogu. And being able to admit that is an important life skill that not enough people have.

· But even after he ask the reader for help he is still hesitant which shows that even though hes trusting reader he will still kick (is it still a kick if its with a tail) the readers ass if he hurts him.

“But you can help him” Oh my heart the trust in that sentence. Like Din just heard, “so yeah I can help your son but I have to take him somewhere it will be hard for you to follow. And he needs to stay there for at least a week, and even if you manage to come its going to be so far from your natural element.” But he was still on board with the plan. And then he goes to climb on the rock so he can drag himself all the way to the light house because he can’t let his little boy go alone even if it means hurting himself to do it.

Reader was smart af for doing the old blanket slipperaroo trick

Reader immediately knowing something was up when she walked into town is so realistic. She literally is hiding a massive secret at her lighthouse of course anyone would be on edge walking back into society. Especially a society that already knows a little something about the secret. But them to amplify it. Miss Chatham to the rescue. She knows that reader is up to something and she uses her powers as an old lady with lungs and karen potential to scare off the problem for a little bit. The reader just placed so much trust on Edna by straight up telling her that she's housing Din and Grogu.

· Also that fool browsing the menstrual hygiene rack, like dumbass. Is this your way of making him miss every shot? Because we know that storm troopers are well known for their ability to miss every shot so making him automatically turn to tampons? Genius

Cashier for the win, like beep beep bitch now pay up

The "cyare" omg and then the reader warning Din about the cookies and him being so curious about them. The way Din is so perceptive of the readers mood that he is already able to tell that something is wrong. It was such a smart idea to have the reader lead with asking him to give her a small chance to calm down about what happened in the town.

Din and the reader low-key flirting and teasing each other at the end is so adorable. Grogu with the cookie absolutely melts my heart like of course that boy is hungry.

So this is a slightly polished layout of my stream of consciousness while reading this. Does it make sense? Probably not. But I love this idea and you have done it justice.

Ahhhhhhz thank you for all of the lovely thoughts and compliments, im glad you like my story and I hope it continuesto meet your expectations!!!! And you made perfect sense darling!

To reply to some things:

Honestly, I chose the isolation for two reasons, 1- it made sense, especially for how the plot is going to play out, privacy and isolation is needed, and 2- im introverted and I like being alone, so I just projected

The town's people are great! They are used to having lighthouse keepers just up and leave because of all the weird stuff, so the second that one sticks around they were all overjoyed, because like I said, a lot of the people work on boats fishing so the lighthouse is super important to them

Din did wait and observe the reader, wanting to know what to do when to attempt to scare them off. But also like no, he tried keeping Grogu away from the lighthouse as much as possible, not knowing what the reader might do to him, and just being a protective father, but we all know Grogu is a little shit and he snuck out before Din could stop him

Reader dresses in the COMFIEST clothes, and honestly, I am very much a sweater and comfy leggings kind of person, so again, something I am projecting

I love that you and everyone is loving Edna, she is definitely one of those cool old ladies that sneak you treats and shenanigans when no one is looking!

Also because idk if anyone has pointed it out.... in the last chapter I thought I was heavily hinting at it, but maybe it was more subtle than I thought, Edna and her MERMAID were alot more than friends *wink wink* she's gay as fuck and thats why she made the joke about not liking NUTS

Din loves Grogu, in and out of this AU, and it was 1000% not his fault that Grogu got hurt, in fact he was trying to protect him! Din definitely panicked and the first person that came to mind was the reader, and while he didn't know them, he knew for some reason they were safe to go to for help (as well as knowing the lighthouse would be a good place to hide while some things cooled down 👀), but Din will always be cautious because he is scared for his son

Din is just *chef's kiss* 👌, an amazing father who will do ANYTHING for his son, no matter what it takes

The whole blanket thing literally came from my childhood, thinking about how my sisters and I would drag eachother around on blankets, and I just thought it would be great for this scenario

Like the reader is gonna get real paranoid during this series, im not going to lie to you, things are gonna get rough, but Edna is the MVP she's one of those people that could pull your darkest secrets from you just by glancing at you, and the reader pretty much assumed she was safe to talk to after she had informed her about the food offerings

Ok ok, as for the dudes, I was too lazy to look up their names and stuff but they were these dudes from season 1 that gave Din Grogu's bounty: the first dude is the one 'hiding' in the women's hygiene section

Din is just obsessed for human food at this point, and he feels things for the reader even of he doesn't want to admit it quite yet

Din also may be oblivious as fuck, but he's also observant, hes a bounty hunter for fucks sake, he needs to be able to pick up on these things, so yes in my stories Din is really good at picking up on emotions, even if he doesn't fully know how to react to them

Im aiming for a slow burn foc, but to be honest with you all, chances are it is going to be a regularly paced romance, which for my writing is slow paced, so yeah the idiots are flirting and teasing eachother, but also like they will not be talking about or admitting feelings for at least a few more chapters

Grpgu deserves all the cookies!!! He's a growing tadpole, who has been magically healing himself while in a coma like state, so he hasnt eaten in days, and if he wanted he'd probably be able to devour 2x his body weight and then some, so a few cookies recieved in some kind of mysterious way are well achieved

Merman!Din Tags: @writeforfandoms @ahopelessromanticwritersworld @honey-goth  @mando-abs @lux-cream-67 @rachelle-on-the-run @katcharm   @ladamari68 @bluegalaxyprime @my-life-as-a-bird @altarsw @zarakem @stargazingthenightaway

(Added the taglist in case any of you guys wanted to read over my thoughts and things bc I have some hcs and cleared somethings up ypu may be wondering about)

[thesixthstar]

Got tagged for this by @astriiformes!

Favorite colour(s): if we’re going for One Fave its gotta be dark teal.but really anything involving jewel tones, or anything shiny/iridescent.

Currently reading:  asdfjlasdfhkjds i currently have a stack of like 6 books that are “next on the list i promise” but ive gotten myself into a pattern where i can’t get myself to start a new fiction book, despite knowing i deeply enjoy them. I started the audio-book to Gideon the Ninth to see if that format would help, but that was a little too lore-heavy to start as audio-only.

Last movie:  Does the Jekyll and Hyde Broadway recording from 2001 with David Hasslehoff count? if not, then probably one of the Star Trek movies as i’ve been slowly working my way through every episode/movie of Star Trek in order of when they were released.

Last song I listened to: Does the Jekyll and Hyde Broadway recording from 2001 with David Hasslehoff count? if not, then Caledonia recorded by Derina Harvey Band (google tells me the original is by Dougie Maclean). Derina Harvey Band singer voice is. good.

Sweet, savory or spicy:  i am the stereotypical “white person can’t handle spicy” but sweet or savory is really a mood difference. Right now if you made me choose i’d lean towards sweet, but tell that to me in a few days when i am inhaling salt&vinegar chips like my life depends on it...

What I’m currently working on:  in life? im trying to stop procrastinating putting off going to IKEA and getting a desk to replace my shitty pandemic-unemployment-interim desk. In crafts? I’ve just finished enough of the planning stages for my next quilt (alphabet quilt for my brother’s second baby-to-be) that i can start touching fabric about it. Its the dreaded ‘should iron your fabric’ stage but i think i will survive the horror. In other projects? i’m back from another long hard day in the fiberglass mines. I am only partially joking. my yard had some Shenanigans occur many moons ago that resulted in junk and trash (of the ‘old furniture and random objects from storage’ variety) to be strewn about the yard. some of this included some of that pink fiberglass insulation fluff, which uh. while the landlords dragged their feet on getting things hauled away, got blown about fucking everywhere. The junk still hasn’t been hauled, and so i got fed up and now spend a few minutes of my lunch break each weekday out in the yard picking up Fluff of Get Mesothelioma instead of weeding like I intended to.

Tagging: (all very optional, so don’t feel bad if you don’t wanna) @windypenguin and @mctreeleth and @andallthehalflings

[bosspigeon]

Adam versus that most evil of foes...the office printer?

two glass houses, twenty stones

Pairing: M!Detective/Adam du Mortain Word Count: 1711 Summary: Having recently learned that he is the target of a power-hungry vampire who wants to experiment on him because of his “special blood” (oh, yeah, and vampires are real, apparently), Detective Arlo Priestley deals with the aftermath. The aftermath, of course, including one Adam du Mortain and his sparkling personality.

So... I don’t even know what to say anymore. I get completely innocuous prompts and they become something COMPLETELY different than what i had in mind. so, uh, hope you enjoy an Arlo Character Study with a side of Printer Shenanigans! This takes place in Book 1, shortly after the detective finds out about, uh, everything. I had fun playing the unreliable narrator with Arlo! And I have a fun idea for a sequel that’s Adam’s POV! Title is from Type O Negative’s “I Don’t Wanna Be Me.”

“You can, uh, sit down if you’d like,” Arlo offers, picking at the chipped polish on his thumb.

Adam hardly glances at him, keeping his attention on the window that overlooks the rest of the police department. “I am fine standing,” he says shortly. It almost seems like he’s determined to not look directly at the detective at all.

Arlo winces a bit, blowing a loose strand of hair out of his face. “Yeah, sure. That’s fine too,” he mumbles, looking down at his pile of reports. He brushes the accumulated black paint chips he’s shed in his anxious fidgeting aside. He’ll have to paint his nails again soon, they’re looking rather ragged, almost to the point he can bite them again. He’s been trying to stop, he knows it’s sort of gross, but still…

He furrows his brow and starts thumbing through reports, absently flicking through his color-coded tabs that help keep him marginally organized even when his “system” doesn’t really work for anyone but him. He calls it improvisational. Verda calls it “slapdash.”

 He frowns, chewing on his lower lip and clicking his tongue when he notes his color system is out of order, and that one of the red tabs is missing. His eyes flicker up when he hears Adam shift slightly, but the vampire still isn’t looking at him, so he focuses back in, counting through reports again. He sighs and rolls his eyes, turning to his computer and pulling up his group chat with Tina and Verda.

big-depeche-mood: Tina, did you take my copy of Mrs. Holt’s police report?

big-depeche-mood:  And why did you change my display name again?

BubblegumB!tch: how do u know i did it? why do u always blame me? 😥

big-depeche-mood: Because Verda has no reason to care about Mrs. Holt claiming her ex kidnapped the dog when they separated.

big-depeche-mood: And if you mean the display name, you’re the only one with admin privilege, because you made this chat.

BubblegumB!tch: i am being unfairly targeted 😭😭😭

BubblegumB!tch: im taking this to HR

DoctorDILF: HR has found no evidence to support this claim.

DoctorDILF: Really, Tina?

big-depeche-mood: Just tell me if I need to print another copy, please.

BubblegumB!tch: 👉👈

Arlo rolls his eyes and minimizes the window so he can start the task of going through his backlog to find the digital copy of the original report. Once he’s found it and sent it to the printer, he pushes himself upright, groaning as his spine pops in several places

Adam finally, finally turns to look at him. “Where are you going?” he snaps.

Arlo flinches, clenching his jaw to bite back the nasty retort burning on his tongue like acid. “To the printer,” he grits out, jerking his hand towards the window. “Literally twenty feet away. So unless you plan to go get that report for me, let’s just hope the megalomaniacal vampire that wants to use me as a lab rat doesn’t decide to snatch me from a police station in broad daylight.”

Seems he didn’t bite it back hard enough after all.

Adam recoils, like he always seems to when he realizes he's stepped directly on Arlo's nerves. He feels a little guilty for snapping, but he’s had more than enough of being treated like an unruly toddler. He wants to snidely suggest Adam see about requisitioning a bloody leash for him, but he snatches up a pen and starts furiously clicking it until he can calm himself down instead. Adam’s lip twitches, and Arlo clicks faster.

Adam turns sharply on heel and stalks out the door, slamming it behind him so hard the window rattles. Arlo is just grateful it hasn’t broken.

He sinks back into his chair and rolls his eyes skyward, dragging his hands down his face and wondering what the hell he’s done to deserve this whole situation. It’s bad enough he knows there’s some mad scientist vampire wanting to experiment with his freakish blood, but being shut in the same room as Adam for multiple hours a day when the man won’t even look at him, much less talk to him, makes nerves squirm under his skin and sets his whole body on edge. Unfortunately for the both of them, when Arlo gets nervy, it gets much harder for him to temper what comes out of his mouth.

He melts into his chair a little more, ignoring the pings from his computer that are probably Verda trying to convince Tina to change his display name back, and Tina reacting by changing it to increasingly ridiculous things. He just closes his eyes and focuses on breathing for a bit, trying to remember a single thing from his anger management classes from years ago when his brain is still buzzing with a squirming twist of irritation and guilt, a desperate need to apologize warring with the urge to snap and unload every frustration this whole thing has got knotted up inside him.

It's some sort of cosmic joke that Adam occupies so much of his attention, when Adam seems like he can't wait until he can get as far away from Arlo as possible.

He's just pretty, Arlo tells himself. Remember the last time you let someone pretty get you all stupid? Maybe remember what you learned from that.

He almost falls out of his chair when he opens his eyes to see Adam in the doorway, his shoulders so taut they're making Arlo's hurt just looking at them.

Maybe stop looking at them, idiot.

He forces his eyes up and is confronted with perhaps one of the most bewildering things he's ever seen.

Adam du Mortain, stoic, no-nonsense, terminally brooding Adam du Mortain, is standing just outside Arlo’s office, looking almost... sheepish. Arlo has to blink a few times to make sure he’s not seeing things. He’d almost say he’s imagining things, but at this point he’s so familiar with Adam’s general stone-faced demeanor that any sort of change to it is almost glaringly obvious. The scrunch of his eyebrows, the twist of his mouth, the almost painful stiffness of his posture, as if he’s pointedly trying to look as unaffected as possible and failing spectacularly. Arlo’s a detective, and while he doesn’t consider himself an expert at reading people, he’s still fairly decent at it. Adam, from time to time, can be pretty easy to read, but especially when he’s trying not to be.

Maybe Arlo’s been watching him a bit too closely.

“Uh,” he starts, already cringing internally at himself, “what’s up?”

Adam is silent for a moment, and then he exhales sharply through his nose, as if he is trying to calm himself down. Arlo’s nerves immediately ratchet up a few notches. “There is an issue with your printer,” he says.

Arlo blinks. “Oh. Um, I didn’t think you’d actually—” He bites his tongue when Adam’s brows furrow harder. “Let’s go have a look, shall we?” he offers instead, standing up. He hesitates to approach the door until Adam takes a step back to allow him through unimpeded. He lets Arlo lead the way and Arlo tugs his braid over his shoulder so he can twist it between his hands, because there is something a bit unnerving about Adam behind him, silent but radiating a tension Arlo can almost feel. It’s likely his imagination, considering his annoying awareness of the man, but still.

Arlo sees the problem almost immediately upon arriving at the little alcove that houses the station’s printer. The top cover for the document feeder seems to have been pulled off entirely. He turns to give Adam a bewildered look.

“The paper jammed,” Adam says stiffly.

“Yeah,” Arlo replies, “it does that sometimes.” He lifts the cover and turns it over in his hands, to see that, yes, the little plastic hinges that attach the feeder to the tray are entirely broken off. He frowns a little. Adam is so tense next to him, so still, Arlo wonders if he’s even breathing. “I can just ask Verda if I can send it to his, then see about calling someone for repairs.” He snags a sharpie from Tina’s desk and pops open one of the other trays to pull out a blank sheet of paper so he can write a quick “Out of Order” sign and slap it on top.

Adam still hasn’t moved, staring at the printer as if it has somehow personally offended him.

“It’s fine, Adam,” Arlo insists quietly, stepping a bit closer with his hands raised, though he doesn’t dare to touch. “Really. It’s a shitty old printer. I bet the second I let Tina know, she’ll go pester Doug until he calls his dad about it. We’ll have a shiny new one in no time.” He offers a wry little smile. “Say what you like about nepotism, but it has its perks.”

That doesn’t seem to help in the way Arlo hoped it would, because Adam raises an eyebrow and gives him a sharp look that has him shrinking back. “I am surprised you have that attitude, Detective.” He doesn’t have to say he’s disappointed, Arlo can hear it loud and clear and hates that it bothers him so much.

He steps back and turns away so Adam doesn’t see the look on his face before he can smooth it over. “Well, it’s the reason I’m here, isn’t it?” he can’t help but snark. “And it’s the only reason you’re here too. Explains a lot about your attitude, I suppose.” No wonder Adam’s been so bloody sour about all this. Must be a pain to have to babysit your boss’s kid because she said so. His silence on the subject speaks more than he could hope to.

More than anything Arlo wishes Rebecca could just go back to ignoring him. Things were a lot less complicated then.

Shoulders tight enough to rival Adam’s, Arlo heads towards the stairs to the basement. “I’m going to get that report,” he tosses over his shoulder, trying and failing to sound casual as Adam’s eerily quiet footsteps begin to follow him. “I’ll try not to get kidnapped on the way,” he adds under his breath.

The way Adam’s footsteps falter tell him he wasn’t quiet enough.

[atmilliways]

On the 2nd day of Dethmas this writer gives to thee…

Dec 14 - Kissing under the mistletoe (or office party shenanigans)

Charles gets roped into the role of Santa Clause at the holiday office party. 

Charles/Pickles

~

The dreaded Dethklok Inc. office Christmas party was coming up—dreaded not by the band or most of the employees, who typically had a blast, but by the CFO who had to arrange and organize everything before and after, up to and including the inevitable handful of resulting funeral arrangements.

Charles was looking forward to it even less than usual, because the band had thrown an absolute shitfit to get him to agree to play Santa this year. He didn’t know why they wanted him to do this. The party didn’t even normally have a Santa. His first thought was that it was Toki’s idea, but on second thought Toki tended to lack the charisma to get the rest of the guys to throw in with him on niche interests like that.

But fine. Whatever. He’d agreed to do it once, and next year he could simply point to whatever came of it this year as an argument against repeating the experience.

He kept telling himself that right up until donning the red and white Santa suit, the iconic hat, and the fake beard. (The damn thing was so big that practically all he could see of his own face in the mirror were his eyes. At least they were letting him keep his glasses.) Then he took his seat in a throne-like chair that had been special ordered for the occasion, specially decorated with carvings of presents, the most unsettling depictions of Christmas elves that he’d ever seen, and skulls with real candles balanced on them, lit and already beginning to dribble red and black wax . . . and immediately felt that somewhere in life he must have made a grave, grave mistake to have ended up here.

The band took the stage in the center of the hall, half the room away from where Charles sat, and went into a jumbled “Merry Christmas, go fuck yourselves!” sort of speech. He mostly tuned it out until—

“And hey, errybody,” Pickles slurred into his mic, “don’t ferget ta sit on Santa’s lap and tell ‘im what you want fer Christmas!”

That had not been part of the discussion, let alone the agreement, but at this point what was he going to do about it? Besides hope that grown men and women hired for their professional abilities would have no interest in sitting on the lap of the man who signed their paychecks.

~

“You can’t have a pony,” Charles said flatly. “There isn’t space for one in the employee barracks, and even if there were it would be both impractical and unsanitary.”

The Klokateer perched on his lap, crushing the feeling out of his legs, tittered and took another sip of his holiday punch through a straw poked up under his mask. “Oo-kay Mr. Grinchy-claus, no pony for me then. Aren’tcha going to say ‘ho ho ho, Merry Christmas’?”

“Ho ho ho. Now go away.”

Laughing drunkenly, the man lurched up and made his way off the Santa podium to get a refill of punch. The next Klokateer in line had an Online Division pin on one shoulder and a spiked eggnog in her hand. Charles braced himself for yet another request for fewer blocks on searching for porn using company computers.

~

“Hey look, it’sch Schanty Clausche!”

Charles grimaced behind his beard. “Hello, Murderface.”

The first of the boys to visit him, Murderface seemed to be in unusually high spirits. His ass landed on Charles’ knees like a ton of bricks. “Wow,” he crooned with exaggerated delight, “Schanta really does know all the namesch of the good little boysch and girlsch!”

“Very funny. Would you mind telling me whose idea this was?”

The bassist shook his head. “Hey man, I’m not here to narc on my bandmatesch, I’m here to tell Schanta what I want for Chrischtmasch. ”

“Alright. Fine. What would you like for Christmas.”

Murderface looked around furtively, then leaned in and whispered, “A dischguische kit.”

“A . . . disguise kit.”

“Yeah! I’m tired of being mobbed whenever I go out in public, scho I need it. For camouflasche. ”

Charles couldn’t remember a single incident of a fan mob forming for just Murderface; it only ever seemed to happen when one or more of the other band members were with him, though there were probably a few people who did wander up and ask for an autograph. There had been one unfortunately memorable band meeting a few months ago where Murderface had bragged about someone wanting to touch his penis for good luck, pleased at the recognition but at the same time calling said fan an ‘incredibly fucking gay regular jackoff.’

“I’ll, ah, make sure that’s added to the list,” Charles assured him, and breathed a sigh of relief when Murderface nodded in satisfaction and stood to leave.

~

“Hey, knock knock.”

Charles sighed from the depths of his soul at this second Dethklok visitation. “Who’s there.”

“Nathan Explosion,” said Nathan Explosion, dropping unceremoniously onto his lap.

Luckily, the beard hid Charles’ wince at the impact. He was probably going to have a lot of weird leg bruises tomorrow. “Nathan Explosion who.”

“Nathan Explosion, here to tell you you’re the party ho ho ho! ” Nathan broke into riotous laughter and clapped Charles good-naturedly on the back, causing him to accidentally inhale a mouthful of fake beard.

After a moment to catch his breath, Charles nodded along. “Very amusing. What would you, ah, like for Christmas, Nathan?”

“I need new pants.”

Well, that was unexpectedly straightforward. “New pants. You got it.”

“One hundred pairs. Exactly one hundred.”

“Okay.”

“Just, uh. A couple inches bigger in the waist. For the holiday weight that I am definitely going to lose in January.”

He couldn’t feel his legs; this was not the time to point out that Nathan wouldn’t have time to wear all one hundred pairs of new pants between December 25th and the start of January, nor that January as a deadline for such a drastic fitness undertaking was probably an unrealistic deadline.

“That’s fine, Nathan. One hundred pairs of pants. I’ll make sure, the, ah, elves get the message.” Maybe he would throw in some math flash cards while he was at it.

~

Toki weighed less than the first two, but was unfortunately so excited that he landed on Charles’ lap hard . Definitely, definitely going to have bruises.

“God Jul, Charles —I means Santa!” the guitarist chirped, bright-eyed and swaying slightly. Charles fervently hoped he wasn’t about to throw up; he didn’t even think being covered in vomit would do much to get him out of this holiday circle of hell. “Merries Christmas!!”

“Merry Christmas to you too, Toki. What do you, ah, want to ask Santa for this year?”

He didn’t have a watch, but he estimated that Toki’s list, plus miscellaneous excited chatter, took at least half an hour and mentioned many things he knew for a fact that Toki already owned.

~

“Eeuyghh, looks, it ams everys-ones favorites butler,” Skwisgaar said, then folded himself gracefully into a sitting position. After an hour or two of being sat on like this and having plenty to compare it to, Charles wondered if the man was eating enough.

This was in spite of the fact that Skwisgaar was toting around a small plate loaded with various cheeses, fruit, and greasy finger sausages skewered on toothpicks. Party food. To Charles, who hadn’t realized that this gig would take so long and therefore hadn’t eaten in advance, it smelled wonderful.

The Swede must have noticed him eyeing it, or perhaps heard the growl of his stomach over the noise of the surrounding party somehow, because he smirked and held it out in offering. “Pickle says for you to haves this. Gots to keep yous strengths up, you knows.”

Pickles, Charles noted as he balanced the plate off to one side on one of the less obvious and candle-less Christmas skulls. He also pulled one of the sausages free of its toothpick and reached under the beard to jam it in his mouth. Still warm.

“Thank you, Skwisgaar,” he said once he’d finished chewing. “Now, what can I get for you? Ah, as Santa. Ho ho.”

“Everyones know it ams three ‘ho’s, dildo.” Skwisgaar steepled his fingers. “But I woulds like five ins mine room to enjoy ons the Christmas morning. You know the kinds I likes?”

Charles didn’t know what he’d expected. “It’s my job to know, so . . . yes.”

“Greats.” The guitarist patted him on the shoulder of his Santa suit. “Glads that ams sorted outs. Keeps up that good works, yous.”

Then he got up and wandered away, leaving Charles to realize that he hadn’t had a chance to ask him who was behind this whole Santa idea.

~

Charles finished the plate of food before Pickles made an appearance. He also realized that he could persuade his increasingly inebriated employees to bring him more food, and also drinks, by threatening them with cleanup duty after the party. (He was not in a generous mood; the ones that tried to weasel out of it at first would get cleanup duty regardless of whether they eventually caved or not.) There was no way to escape the alcohol content in the drinks—even when he asked for water it came spiked with vodka or peppermint schnapps, because everyone wanted to see the company’s CFO hammered.

At least they knew better than to roofie him, because Charles would have them killed.

He saw Pickles coming from a mile away. Maybe it was because Charles knew that once all of Dethklok had a chance to visit with “Santa Clause” he would be allowed to escape this torment; maybe it was because he really wanted to know if Pickles was, indeed, the mastermind behind this whole thing; and maybe it was just a tiny bit because he was annoyed the drummer had forgotten to wander over earlier.

But being annoyed at any of the guys was a nonstarter. Putting up with their antics was just part of the job.

“Heeeeeeeeeeey,” Pickles greeted him as he swayed his way over and plopped onto Charles’ lap. Unlike everyone else who had visited Santa this evening, he didn’t stick to perching closer to Charles’ knees but scooted in as close as he could until they were practically nose to nose. Mingled notes of every kind of booze available at the party wafted the short distance from the drummer’s mouth (and shirt, and hands, and dreads), until all Charles could smell was Pickles. “Lookin’ hot in that suit, dood. Is the temp in here okay? Gettin’ a little warm in there?”

“I’m fine, thank you,” Charles said, trying not to be too aware that Pickles seemed incapable of sitting still and his ass was rubbing against . . . things. “Ah. Merry Christmas.”

Pickles snickered. “Did Nat’en make that ho joke?”

No one could see for the beard that Charles’ lips twitched toward a smile at that. “Yes, he did.”

“‘M glad yer not a ho, Charlie,” Pickles slurred affectionately. “A'least, not no much'a one. That’d be a bummer.”

“Ah . . . okay.” He didn’t know what to make of that, or the continuing subtle lap dance, so he said, “What would you like for Christmas this year, Pickles?”

“Weeeeell. . . .” Grinning, Pickles waggles his double-pierced eyebrows. It seems like he’s trying to be suggestive, but Charles has no idea what that’s supposed to suggest. The drummer leaned even closer, lips brushing against Charles’ ear as he murmurs, “I kinda already got my present right in front’a me, chief. Just gotta unwrap it.”

All of this was sending shivers and goosebumps down Charles’ spine under the (admittedly warm) Santa suit, but for heaven’s sake, it was just Pickles. When wasted, which he was more often than not, man oscillated between being a destructive drunk and clingy one. Apparently tonight it was . . . very much so the latter. Not a good time to ask about the Santa plot, really.

He had dealt with this before, just not with Pickles literally draped over and inconspicuously grinding on him. Come on, Offdensen, pull it together . Do not get a boner at the holiday office party. No matter how long it’s been!

“Well, ah, sounds like you’re all taken care of then,” Charles hazarded. “All that’s left to do is, ah, enjoy the party. Why don’t you go do that.”

Pickles chuckled, a low, sultry sound that just made the situation even more difficult. “Workin’ on it dood, I’m workin’ on it.” He shifted thoughtfully again, then bit his lip through a grin. “And it feels like we’re gettin’ there, huh chief?”

“I. Ah, what?” At least the big fake beard was concealing his blush better than he’d been able to contain his body’s mounting interest in the increasingly distracting ass squirming around on top of him. This is a public place , he wanted to protest, but didn’t want to risk pointing out something that might be completely unintentional. After all, it was Pickles , who did this sort of thing fairly regularly.

But the next murmured words out of Pickles’ mouth stopped every single one of Charles’ thoughts in their tracks.

“Fuck, even in this stupid suit yer sexy. How d’you do that?” A brief nip, teeth closing and tugging on Charles’ earlobe before releasing with a soft wet pop .

Nothing but overwhelmed static on the other side of that ear; the quiet gasp was completely involuntary.

“C’mon Charlie,” Pickles all but whined, “you don’t have to do this anymore. Jest call it a night and meet me in the bathroom or somethin’, okie?”

The amazing thing, Charles thought distantly, was that from a distance, it wouldn’t look like anything was happening. Just a grown man, swaying drunk off his ass, sitting on Santa’s lap to whisper what he wanted for Christmas. Regular office holiday party shenanigans for a laugh. But under the surface, Charles was starting to feel like a shaken champagne bottle.

“You, ah,” he managed. “You do realize that you, ah, seem to be prepositioning me for, ah. Sex?”

Pickles leaned into him with a laugh. “Like I said, dood, that’s what I’m tryin’ ta do. Fer like, fuckin’ forever. For a smart guy you can be pretty stupid, y’know that?”

“Ah.” Charles shifted awkwardly and nearly choked when Pickles very pointedly pushed into it at the exact right moment. “There’s . . . a chance I’ve been told that before,” he hedged, already vowing to himself that he would never admit how many times. This isn’t something he ever would have looked for, but mistaking Pickles hitting on him for god only knew how long for just being an affectionate drunk? That was pretty fucking funny if you thought about it, and he'd consumed just enough alcohol so far to really give it some very serious thought.

And . . . his job was to keep everyone in the band happy.

“So, ah. There are several bathrooms off this hall. . . . Which one did you have in mind?”

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

The BNHA Group Chat Fic Nobody Asked For

Pairings: Todoroki Touya (Dabi)/Mr/ Compress (Sako Atsuhiro), Shimura Tenko (Shigaraki Tomura)/Chisaki Kai (Overhaul)/Kurono Hari (Chrono), Yamada Hizashi (Present Mic)/Aizawa Shouta (Eraserhead)/Shirakumo Oboro (Loud Cloud), Fukukado Emi (Ms. Joke)/Kayama Nemuri (Midnight)

Word Count: 1,088 Words

Summary: Todo-siblings, teacher shenanigans, the 1-A twins accidentally freeze out the fifth floor, and Kirishima is best boy.

Warnings: Cursing, Sleep Deprivation, Insomnia, Abuse Mention, Mensuration/Period Mentions, Caps, Food Mention, Half Blind Character, Deaf Characters, Anxiety Mention, Mostly Mute Character (due to a different medical issue), Selectively Mute Character, let me know if I should add anything else.

Note: Natsuo and Fuyumi's chat names are based on quirk headcanons I have for them. Natsuo's is because I headcanon him to have a quirk where he can manipulate and generate water like Shoto can with his ice and Fuyumi's because I headcanon her to have a thermal manipulation quirk. Touya's is 'wine' because white and red wine and his hair is red and white.

Usernames: We Are Number One™ Aizawa: Dadzawa, Aoyama: immafiringmahlaser, Ashido: princessbubblegumknockoff, Asui: Galvan, Iida: Emergency Exit, Uraraka: 9.8, Ojiro: tailfloof, Kaminari: Pichu, Kirishima: baby shark, Koda: youredoingamazingsweetie, Sato: GuyFieriIsGod, Shoji: Cthulhu, Jirou: Jack Skellington, Sero: Spider-Man, Tokoyami: EdgarAllanCrows, Todoroki: WHERE?, Hagakure: cena, Bakugo: WHAT?, Midoriya: SmolMight, Mineta: Mineta, Shinsou: exhausted, Yaoyorozu: TheGreatCreator, Kurono: stopwatch, Chisaki: donthugmeimscared, Yukimura: choticgaydisaster, Bubaigawara: shadowclonejutsu, Shimura: idontfeelsogood, Awase: illrememberyouallintherapy, Kaibara: IDOWHATIWANT, Kamakiri: scyther, Kuroiro: itsmeyaboy, Kendo: Akimichi, Kodai: deadinside, Komori: shroomgurl, Shiozaki: wElCoMeToBiBlEsTuDiEs, Shishida: furry, Shoda: cryptid, Tsunotori: mylittlepony, Tsubaraba: airbender, Tetsutetsu: Iron Man, Tokage: t-rex costume, Fukidashi: glorifiedtextbubble, Honenuki: Eren Jaeger/spookyscaryskeletons, Bondo: Slimer, Monoma: HopeSummers, Yanagi: iLiEdImDyInGiNsIdE, Rin: snek, Toga: mystique, Sako: lostmymarbles, Hikiishi: queenofmagnetism, Iguchi: eye gucci, Shinokanri: stardust

Usernames: Emos Anonymous Kaminari: blackcloakedbrides, Shoji: fryingpan, Jirou: greentwentyfourhours, Tokoyami: myscientificinfatuation, Todoroki: twentyoneplotpoints, Bakugo: immobileinwhite, Midoriya: falldownboy, Shinsou: stabtheveil, Kurono: inhalecarolina, Chisaki: plummetingininverse, Yukimura: anxietyintheclub, Shimura: nappingwithsirens, Kuroiro: thousandfootcane, Kodai: marianaspit, Monoma: entiretimelow, Yanagi: recentyearsday, Sako: halfminutetomars, Aizawa: hollywoodlivingdead, Shouji: fryingpan, Kurono: inhalecarolina, Aoyama: phantomtown, Honenuki: visualizedragon, Sako: halfminutetomars, Awase: distressparade, Shinokanri: simplestrategy

Usernames: UA Teachers Are Tired™ Eraserhead/Aizawa: grumpy scarf cat, Present Mic/Yamada: screeching cockatiel, Midnight/Nemuri: chaotic goth gay Ingenium/Iida: gotta go fast, AllMight/Toshinori: actual sunshine, Vlad King/Kan: bloody hell, Power Loader/Majima: speechtotext, Ectoplasm: needalegup?, Snipe: kazoo cowboy, Cementoss: concrete block, Blackmist/Kurogiri: goth portals

We Love A Good, Caring Dadzawa In This House-Chapter 3

11:38 PM

UA Teachers Are Tired™

chaotic goth gay: so anygay we ever gonna talk bout the fact that the twins in 1a plan to take a week home?

kazoo cowboy: no??? it's their personal life????

needalegup?: I say we leave the boys alone.

screeching cockatiel: they don't like being referred to at 'the twins' Nemuri. They're separate beings.

chaotic goth gay: okay, the two canadian flags of Shouta's 25 nearly adopted children.

grumpy scarf cat: you're right but why say it?

bloody hell: I thought his class was 26 students now like mine? who tf you forgetting Nemuri?

chaotic goth gay: no one I be leaving out that little grapist tho. hate him and so does Shouta

screeching cockatiel: OwO oh worm?

grumpy scarf cat: never again Hizashi. never again.

screeching cockatiel: OvO

grumpy scarf cat: i hate you.

screeching cockatiel: love you too babe uwu

grumpy scarf cat: well,

grumpy scarf cat: i'm gonna go yeet myself off the roof for that one.

screeching cockatiel: Nuuuuuuu, how will me Hitoshi and Ayane ever survive without you!?

grumpy scarf cat: tru tru

grumpy scarf cat: I'll take Hitoshi with me.

screeching cockatiel: you wouldn't dare!

grumpy scarf cat: again tru tru

2:24 AM

UA Teachers Are Tired™

grumpy scarf cat: yeet yeet bitch he finally asleep [pic of Hitoshi asleep against Aizawa's side with Ayane asleep between them]

chaotic goth gay: that's perfect.

chaotic goth gay has changed their name to yeet yeet bitch

yeet yeet bitch: thank boi me sleep now

yeet yeet bitch is offline

4:14 AM

We Are Number One™

WHERE?: so anyway I'm ready to yeet our dad into the sun but that's too good for him

chaoticdisastergay: oh worm???? same hat??? could stand to snow his eyes out first tho

immafirinmahlaser: why y'all puttin ur father on blast in the main chat?

WHERE?: wait, where? oh fuck wrong one Touya, wrong one! mayday mayday

SmolMight: I was summoned my the word mayday what happened

SmolMight: oh

SmolMight: well then

lostmymarbles: Dear? Please lay down? I was comfortable?

chaoticdisastergay: well, speaking of tmi, I thought it was just a bathroom run but turns out my monthly came a week early, Atsu. I'm coming back.

WHERE?: that was a long time in the bathroom but okay.

lostmymarbles: Yeah, almost an hour. I'm lonely, the bed feels cold without you, snowdrop!

chaoticdisastergay: I had to shower over in the 1a dorms too, calm down.

lostmymarbles: Kay, come back to bed, I wanna cuddle.

SmolMight: Such precious. Most pure. We have been blessed with witnessing this couple be cute.

WHERE?: so anNYway, Touya, you goin back to the family chat?

chaoticgaydisaster: yee

4:30 AM

Trauma? Yeet. Memes? Yoink.

vulpix: anygay. still wanna yeet our dad into the sun but it'd still be too good for him.

lapis: I??? feel that????? wtf???????

thermostat: oh? a mood? in this good household?

wine: i really just want to go back to sleep but the brain machine broke i'm woke

vulpix: oh worm?

thermostat: anyway gotta actually get outta bed soon, drop off your girls at daycare, get mine to school, and go to work.

lapis: fine, gonna go with ya

thermostat: mhmmmm sure you are, you're gonna fall asleep in 20 minutes Natsuo.

lapis: that may be but i'll at least try

thermostat: doubt

thermostat is offline

8:24 AM

We Are Number One™

cena: so anyway tea apparently shoto and touya are going home all next week

princessbubblegumknockoff: oh? drama?

WHERE?: family visit no drama

chaoticgaydisaster: just visiting our family

SmolMight: so anygay Aizawa told us we have someone special visiting a1 today for class!

Spider-Man: I wonder who it is!

Dadzawa: toshi cmon I gotta get to class and drop you off like a gay goth god of insomniac children

exhausted: hol up im eating still

exhausted is offline

Dadzawa is offline

cena: well, no answers from them i guess

Emergency Exit: Everyone, please get off your phones in class!

9:37 AM

We Are Number One™

itsmeyaboy: so who was it that came to your class?

TheGreatCreator: The Big Three of UA

itsmeyaboy: huh. we had Hawks, Ryukyu, and Mirko

Iron Man: The Three Greats of UA

HopeSummers: We win.

SmolMight: Meh, we both got good people to teach us.

HopeSummers: Valid, carry on.

2:28 PM

UA Teachers Are Tired™

gotta go fast: so anyway, am i ever gonna get told why there's someone named speechtotext in this chatroom and who all they are?

kazoo cowboy: That's Majima with the support course.

needalegup?: he couldn't figure out how to work his phone with his fingers when we first made this chat and he used speech to text a lot.

goth portals: we used to get a lot of text messages where Hatsume had spoken over him and it became too much of a meme so Nemuri changed his name to speechtotext.

gotta go fast: understandable, have a nice day.

7:24 AM

We Are Number One™

Spider-Man: um guys all of floor five is frozen what happened?

Galvan: the girls' side isn't but it's getting cold over here

GuyFieriIsGod: My door is frozen shut.

Spider-Man: Todoroki or Yukimura must have had a nightmare again

TheGreatCreator: Does this happen often?

Spider-Man: more than you'd believe.

GuyFieriIsGod: Does anyone have an ice pick?

Galvan: i'm going downstairs before it spreads

TheGreatCreator: That's a good idea, Tsu, we don't want you getting too cold and hibernating.

WHAT?: wow

Spider-Man: wow? just wow? dude, help us!

WHAT?: ...

WHAT?: perish.

baby shark: I'm coming!

7:45 AM

We Are Number One™

Spider-Man: KIRISHIMA IS A GODSEND

GuyFieriIsGod: He got us out.

TheGreatCreator: It was easier because Todoroki likely melted it.

GuyFieriIsGod: Anyway, now that we're free, I'm making breakfast if anyone wants any. 1b and Shinsou included

WHAT?: wow

cena: Is Bakugo okay?

SmolMight: Yeah, that's just his morning brain. That happens if he gets less than an hour of sleep. He kinda short circuits for about an hour.

Pichu: excellent. thank you for this knowledge.

princessbubblegumknockoff: sometimes I question if your have a death wish.

Pichu: a death wish to get him to hug me and tell me i'm cute dammit!

Pichu is offline

baby shark: a very pure death wish. we don't deserve you denki!

WHERE?: It's been made apparent to me that I froze the fifth floor and I'm sorry.

chaoticgaydisaster: and I made enough snow it was practically snowmen

princessbubblegumknockoff: THEY RISE!

WHERE?: too early for this i need a pot of coffee

chaoticgaydisaster: mood but also gimme half dammit

Taglist: @logan-sanders-enthusiast @luckyicekitsune @whippedbel @lgbtforeverything @pinecone-chomper @mikmacmoo @wasinotwantedatthisexactsecond @purplespiderstormcloud @stankyratman @king-of-the-oranges @headcannons-and-random-things @fear-ze-queer @turtleluv799 @ymmm-someone