#'no not like the baltic sea'-'what do you mean not like the baltic sea'

[dresshistorynerd]

Hey, I noticed that in one of your posts you showed an Iron Age Finnish woman's dress. Would you happen to have a good idea of what Finnish men were wearing in that era? The information on it seems sparse. I do have a relevant book that I'm about to look through, but I'd like to hear your insight too!

Hi! Thanks for the question (and sorry for the slow answer), I do love Finnish Iron Age clothing so it's always my pleasure to write about it. I've been wanting to do a deep dive into this for a long while, so maybe I'll do at some point a post about women's dress too.

Unfortunately no one has good idea of the Finnish Iron Age men's dress (and if you find any book or other source that claims otherwise, do not trust it), since there's much fewer archaeological finds of men's dress than women's dress. The most accepted theory on why the textiles of women's dress survived surprisingly well is because of the bronze ornamentation commonly sewn into especially the fine women's dresses of the era. The bronze protected them from decomposing fully. Presumably men's dresses were not decorated similarly then. There are some finds though and we can piece together at least some kind of vague picture.

I will be discussing the period from Viking Age to Crusade Age in Finland. Viking Age is often defined to cover 800s to mid-1000s and the Finnish Crusade Age started right after the Viking Age and ended in the end of 1200s, where the Finnish Medieval era begins. Crusade Age refers to the period where mostly Swedish (also German) crusaders in the span of couple of centuries conquered lands of the Baltic-Finnic pagans. The crusades of this period targeted pagans all over eastern Baltic Sea, including Baltic-Finnic Karelians, Livonians and Estonians, and Baltic peoples, and the Scandinavia too, where Sámi people were targeted. After that the Finland and Sápmi were colonized by Norse people and stayed that way untill Finland was transferred under Russian rule, but to this day Sápmi still stays under colonial rule, including Finnish colonial rule. The current Finland was very multicultural area, mostly populated by Finno-Ugric peoples, including Sámi people, Karelians and various Finnish peoples.

It's important to understand that even just Finnish peoples where not homogeneous, but had distinct, yet of course strongly related cultures. These were Finns (suomalaiset) (yes most people we now call Finns were not in fact called that) in the coast of southwestern and western Finland, Tavastians (hämäläiset) in central-western lake-Finland and Savonians (savolaiset) in central-eastern lake-Finland. This means we can't mix findings from all over Finland to reconstruct a dress without evidencing that all the elements were actually used in one place. These three tribes had broadly similar base for their clothes, but distinctive jewelry and detailing. The big divide was and has always been between eastern and western Finnish peoples. This is because western Finnish people were in close contact through the sea with Norse people and southern Baltic-Finnic peoples, while eastern Finnish people, Savonians mostly, were influenced a lot by their proximity with Karelians. Another dividing factor was the very different environmental conditions between western and eastern Finland. The Finnish coast especially in west is very flat and fertile land, while the lake area, especially in eastern Finland is very rocky, hilly and quite infertile. The main way it effected clothing differences was that western Finland being more wealthy had more elaborate clothing. Tavastians in both occasions fall quite in between, but they tended to be more in the western cultural camp.

My most important sources are a study by a doctor of cultural anthropology, Jenny Kangasvuo, Savon historia I (Savonian history) digitized and open sourced here and the digitized archeological collection of Finnish Heratage Agency. They are all in Finnish so not very useful for most people unfortunately.

Finnish Men's Dress in Viking and Crusader Ages

The basic garments men wore were broadly similar as women. They wore a shift/shirt, knee or above-knee length dress, cloak, belt, shoes and some kind of headwear. Wool was used most commonly, though the shirt would sometimes be linen too. Even evidence of silk has been found in some western Finland graves. I would assume that would be from a dress of some great man, who traveled to gain riches, possibly with vikings. Embroidery and decoration with metals was a typical feature of the whole Eastern Baltic Sea area. In Finland during this period bronze was the most common decorative metal, but silver was used too. Decorative elements were usually woven with small bronze spirals into all kinds of patterns. Here's examples from the reconstructed Ravattula's dress (Finns) used by women.

Shirt

The shirt (in Finnish shift of both women and men was called shirt) was basically a long shirt or under dress. We can assume it was similar to those of women's except shorter since the dress men wore was shorter too. They were made from wool or linen, I would assume wool was used in winter and linen in summer, when linen was even available. The neckline had a cut and closed with a bronze brooch. Horseshoe brooch was common. The first one is a quite typical bronze horseshoe brooch with a bit of ornamentation from Salo (Finns). The second one is from Tuukkala, (Savonians), it has exceptional ornate detailing and is uncommonly silver, not bronze. The third picture has two quite uniquely ornamented horseshoe brooches, first from Köyliö (Finns), second from Kurikka (Finns).

Legwear and footwear

Very little of men's legwear has survived and it's unclear weather men wore pants or separate pant legs, leg wraps or perhaps long socks. Evidence of strings decorated with bronze spirals and tablet woven band has been found in leg area of men's graves. This could mean that they wore either leg wraps, long sock or some sort of pant legs that needed to be secured with string or band under knee. Women used strings and tablet woven tape to secure leg wraps and socks, which I think supports that theory. Sometimes both bronze decorated string and tablet woven band was found in the leg area, which would still be explained by this theory, since it was common to decorate the ends of the bands with bronze decorated strings. Here's an example of sock bands just like that from the earlier mentioned reconstruction of the Ravattula's women's dress. Since men's dress was shorter, I think it would make sense if they still wore some kind of pants or separate pant legs with socks or leg wraps like that.

However, the strings and bands could have also been part of the shoes. Everyone probably wore similar shoes - laced leather shoes with a bit of pointed end. They might have been short or ankle length and the lacing was done with either leather cord or tablet woven band, which would also explain the findings. Socks or feet wraps would have been used in them, and straw or wool could be added as filling for warmth. Here's a pair of traditional Izhorian shoes from Estonia from early 1900s, and a pair of traditional Sámi shoes. The designs were likely roughly similar in Viking and Crusader Ages, though obviously more simple, and it's probable that Finnish shoes very something like that too. Here's a 1893 drawing of what findings of shoe material from Korpiselkä (Savonian or Karelian) might have looked like. Considering the quality of archaeology of that time, copious amounts of salt should be applied. And finally as a fourth picture there's reconstruction shoes from Ravattula's dress.

These are not necessarily mutually exclusive theories. The lacing of the shoe could have been laced up the leg and used also to secure either sock or leg wrapping, or they could have been separately secured in ankle and knee respectively.

In some graves twill fabric has been found in the leg area. It could be part of pants or for example leg wrapping, which was often made of twill. One theory about pants is that they were similar as some findings in Sweden, where fairly tight pants made of twill were secured at the hem with buttons similar to cuff studs. These kinds of cuff stud buttons are quite a common find in Finland and some have been found in men's graves close to legs.

Dress

Again there's not much findings of dresses, but a little more perhaps. It was usually from wool. The shape was either a tunic or an open coat. In Karelia there's findings of men's dress suggesting tunics thicker than women's dresses and made from sarka, a type of broadcloth. On the other hand, in Masku (Finns) they found buttons in a row on top of the torso, which suggest a coat closed with buttons. The first picture is a drawing of the grave find. Similary coak closing amounts of buttons have also been found in other places in western Finland. This suggests that Finns and probably Tavastians too wore long coats buttoned to the waist and Savonians wore tunic of Karelian influence. Below there's couple of version of what might this western Finnish men's coat dress could've looked like. The first is an imagined version of the coat based on the Masku grave finds, second is just as imagined version based on Eura (also Finns) grave finds.

Take these "reconstructions" with a strong dose of salt. These are more artistic reconstructions than scientific, since there's not enough material and too much guesswork needs to be done. And because we can see in the Masku grave drawing right here that the other deceased has a large buckle to (probably) close the shirt (to be fair, it could for a cloak too), like was typical, I find it implausible that the coat neckline would be small and round covering the buckle. If you make a decorated big buckle, I assume you want to show it. I would find a v-neckline more probable. It's also easier to make without wasting expensive fabric.

The buttons are interesting. There were what you would imagine - your typical buttons made of bronze like seen in the first artifact from Hattula (Tavastians). But then there was silver jingle bells used as buttons, found for example in both Masku and Eura graves, Eura findings pictured below.

It's possible, even probable I'd say, that the hemlines of men's dresses were finished with tablet weaving patterns, like women's dresses. Also I would assume the pattern of the men's dress (and shirt) was mostly similar to the women's underdress/shirt patterns. So here's couple of different reconstruction patterns for women's dress. Different historians have made different interpretations of the patterns, so it's very much undecided what it really was like.

Belt

This is likely the most ornamental part of men's dress. They could be made out of leather or tablet woven band. And there's another east-west cultural divide here. Karelian belts were made out of leather, were usually 1,5-2,5 cm wide, decorated with iron or bronze studs and had a buckle made out of iron or bronze. These types of belts have been found in Savonia too, for example in Tuukkala grave find, which you can find very cool pictures of in this photo documentation of the dig in pages 173-175. In western Finland a "hela" belt was the common style. I don't think there's a world for hela in English. It's a sort of decorative lamella, small metallic plate (not necessarily square but often so) attached to fabric or leather with studs or sewing. Hela belt came from the Permians of Kama river, who were one of the many Finno-Ugric peoples who used to populate much of European side of Russia. Karelians lived closer to Permians, so you might think Permians would influence eastern Finland more, but my theory is that the costal Finns, who frequently joined viking crews and at least were in close contact with merchants including vikings, who would travel along the eastern route through the eastern European rivers, where they could go all the way to Kama river or at least meet traveling Permians. Here's yet another Finnish source more on the Finno-Ugric people around Kama river.

Anyway, hela belt was made of leather and filled with small decorated lamellas, often in square shape, but various other shapes too, like animal ornamentation. In this period hela belt helas were bronze. First image is a nice full set of hela belt metal pieces found in Pirkanmaa (Finns). Second is an older example, right before Viking Era, from Vaasa, costal settlement, (Finns), depicting a very Permian style. The third one is a lion hela found separately in Pälkäne (Tavastians). They are also found in Tuukkala, showing that both eastern and western cultural influences were present there at the same time.

Another western Finnish belt type for men had intricate tassels decorated with bronze spirals hanging on the waist at the end of the belt. They could be made out of leather or tablet woven band. First image depicts a reconstruction of such tassel. Belts in east and west would have strap dividers to hang straps for things like purse, knife and sword. The first picture above has couple of those, but the second picture below has two more of them in more detail in the middle of the picture. These finds are from Lieto (Finns).

Cloak

Like women's cloak, men's cloak was woolen and either a square or trapezoid. Cloak is yet another east-west divide. In western Finland men's cloaks have embroidery with bronze spirals. They in fact appeared earlier in men's cloaks (in 900s) than in women's cloaks (1100s). They were also a little different in men's cloaks. The spirals and the patterns themselves were bigger and the fastening thread itself was also used for the pattern creation, unlike in women's dresses, where the thread was mostly covered. In eastern Finland there has been no finds of bronze decorations in men's cloaks, mostly only cloak brooches have been left of them. Unsurprisinly same applies to Karelia. This also means there's very little fabric left too. There's one exception. In Tuukkala (Savonians) they found a piece of fabric probably from men's cloak, though it could be from a men's dress too. It was striped, with possibly white or brown base and wide stripes of red, blue and yellow. So perhaps eastern Finnish cloak was not non-decorated, but the decoration was in the fabric pattern. Unfortunately it's hard to know how common fabric like that was, when so little of it is left.

Accessories

It's safe to assume men too wore some type of headwear, but none of those has survived. It probably means it was entirely made out of fabric whatever it was. Some type of hat or cap was certainly used in cold weather at the very least. Tablet woven headband was also possible option for not too cold weather.

In Tuukkala there was couple of interesting jewelry finds too. Two graves had a necklace type mostly found in Karelia. It was birchbark tape covered with nettle fabric and had square helas sewn into it. There were also more typical Finnish necklaces made of beads and bronze spirals.

Razors have also been found with men in their burials, so we can assume shaven faces or at least trimmed beards and moustaces were fashionable.

[discolesbo]

Etymological origins of the names of the regions of Finland

Suomi, Häme = Of the same origin together with "Sámi". There is no certainty of their etymology, but a common theory suggests they'd be a loan from the Baltic "žemē", meaning "land". However, modern linguists seem to argue that this is also inaccurate.

Satakunta = From Swedish "hundare", a Viking Age and early Middle Age Scandinavian war and governance system.

Pirkanmaa = Possibly from "birk", a special legal protection given to trading centers (early 1200s).

Uusimaa = Translated from Swedish "Nyland" (New Land).

Kymenlaakso = "Valley of Kymi". Kymi is a river. The word itself means... a big river.

Pohjanmaa = "Northland".

Keski-Suomi = "Central Finland".

Savo = From "Savilahti" (Clay Bay), the old name of the Mikkeli area. The origin of "Savilahti" is still debated, if it was originally savi (clay), savu (smoke), sauvo, or possibly a Sámi word for a backwater (savo, savu).

Karjala = A bit unclear. It comes from the word "karja", and if this word is of Germanic origin, then it could mean (war)band.

Kainuu = Unknown. Theories include Germanic loan "kainu/kaino" (lowlands), "kainus" (knob-headed staff, wedge-shaped object), a Sámi origin (compare gaajnuo, gaajnuoladdje (non-Sámi peasant); kai´nōlatj (Swedish coastal peasant); kainolats, kainahaljo (Swedish or Norwegian peasant)), Old Icelandic "kveinir" (an unspecified Northern Nordic people) or Proto-Norse "gainuz" (gap, jaw) -> "kainu(s)" (dragnet, sleigh).

Lappi = The most controversial of them all, I'd say. "Lapp" name usually refers to Sámi people, although they do not like this term so don't call them that. As for the etymological origin of said word, two theories: 1) a translation of an ancient Sámi tribe name "wuowjoš", from the word "wuowˈje" (wedge, patch) -> "lapp" (patch, small piece of paper). Old Finnish term for Sámi people is "vuojolaiset". 2) Meaning a remote area. The region of "Lappi" in Finland is a combination of two lands: Peräpohjola (Back of the Northland) and the areas of Sápmi (in Finnish "Saamenmaa") which are within the borders of Finland. Former land is Finnish, the latter Sámi.

Ahvenanmaa = "Perch land". Two theories: either it comes from Proto-Norse "Ahvaland" (water land?), or the Finnish form is the original.

In Swedish in the cases where it differs from the Finnish origin:

Österbotten = "East Bottom". As opposed to West Bottom, Västerbotten, on the Swedish side of the Baltic Sea.

Kajanaland = From the historical Russian name for Kainuu, "Kajánij/Kayániy". Meaning unknown, though some say it means a land in which it is difficult to travel. Likely, it is connected to the word "Kainuu".

Tavastland = Apparently from Old Norse "Tafæistaland" (ᛏᛆᚠᛋᛏᛆᛚᚭᚿᛏ). Origin unknown, theories say the "ast" part could somehow be connected to Estonia.

Finland = Hahaha. Unknown. Old sources use the word "finn" and variants to refer to both Sámi and Finns and you never really know what's the intention (think of Finland and Finnmark). Theories say that the origin of the word could be connected to Germanic words such as "finthan" (find), "fendo" (wanderer).

Åland = "River land". Two theories: either it comes from Proto-Norse "Ahvaland" (water land?), or the Finnish from "Ahvenanmaa" (perch land) is the original.

[rogerswifesblog]

- chapter 8 -

Previous chapter

My Masterlist

Series Masterlist

A/N: Hello:) a short chapter from Steve’s point of view. Have fun reading and please don’t forget to leave some feedback and to reblog it. It means a lot, really.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x mermaid reader

Warnings: suicidal thoughts? Kinda?

Steve’s PoV

As soon as he got back to the compound he felt something was missing.

Well, someone.

„Pal, it’ll be-“ „I’m gonna go take a nap“, he interrupted Bucky, feeling incredibly bad about it but if he had to honest with himself he just wanted to crawl beneath his covers and sleep for the rest of the day..or as long as it’s take for him to forget about you.

Steve had thought you’d be more hurt-that you’d take some more time till actually disappearing into the depths of the sea but…maybe he was wrong, maybe you didn’t care about him as much as he cared about you.

As soon as he entered his bedroom he threw himself onto the bed, sighing dramatically. Steve threw the covers over himself, burying his head into his pillow. He took a deep breath and-

“For fucks sake”, the pillow smelled like you. He couldn’t really describe your smell, it has something salty or sea-ish in it, but was at the same time sweet. Addicting. It was addicting.

Even though he knew he’d hurt himself more while doing it-he pressed his nose back into the pillow, enjoying the last moments this would last. He was sure it’d be gone soon, but for now it was all he needed to feel at least a bit better. To have his heart feel like it was ripping apart. Breaking in million pieces…

Who was he kidding?

It was already broken.

He felt awful. He had never felt this bad before. Not even when Peggy had died and he had always believed he had been in love with her… but maybe…maybe he was in love now? Maybe love was supposed to feel like this? Like broken glass that was slowly falling apart with every touch. Steve felt like broken glass and was slowly falling apart with every reminder of you.

He felt empty. He felt empty after having given you his whole heart. You took it with you. Unintentionally. But you took it. And now Steve only felt pain, sadness and yet at the same time emptiness.

A single tear rolled down his face as he slowly felt himself falling asleep.

His dreams were filled with water. Deep waters, he could tell it was the sea. Was it one of his nightmares about sinking the Valkyrie? No…it was something different. It wasn’t a nightmare. He felt rather…at peace. As if he was close to home. As if the water was his home. Which…was weird. He hated the deep sea. Or any deep water to be exact.

And then he saw people. And a castle. And armor and…god there were so many guards. Where the hell did those dreams come from?

It was all blurry, like an old memory, but still clear enough for him to recognise the scene.

It was your memory-or rather, the current moment.

Then someone wrapped you in a tight hug and Steve woke up with a gasp.

You were home.

You made it home safely.

And he was…relieved? Maybe? Or was he rather angry? Heartbroken?

You just left him. And you made him watch your Happy End?

Where was his Happy End? It was supposed to be with you.

He thought it was forever after love…

That kind of love you read books about, that love you saw in movies-but he wasn’t in a movie. He wasn’t in a book.

This was life.

And he was never meant to have a Happy End.

He was a soldier. He’d always be a soldier, nothing else.

So that’s exactly what he’d throw himself into. His destiny was to fight. So he’d fight.

But not the fight he’d want to fight.

His fight was already over. His love was gone.

Steve was gone the next day. First he went to Fury, asking him for something he’d make himself busy with-a undercover mission in Europe, close to the Baltic Sea. Fine with him. He only told Bucky he’d be away on a mission and had no idea when he’d be back.

Within hours he was on his way to Germany to his new small cabin close to the beach, where he’d probably spend his free time too. Just watching the water…imaging you and what you were doing.

Maybe you were with your family, maybe with some partner, maybe…god what if they want you to marry someone?

He shook his head at that. This wouldn’t make sense, right?

He shook his head again, this time rather in annoyance about himself. All he wanted was to get his head empty from all the thoughts about you, yet it seemed impossible.

It’s like you filled up his whole mind, all his thoughts, just…just every fiber of his body.

A tear escaped the corner of his eyes, which he quickly wiped away not wanting to show any weaknesses, even though he was alone.

After unpacking his things he sat down on the porch, just looking at the sea. It felt in a way very calming…and at the same time very upsetting.

Would this feeling ever go away?

The days went by. He dreamed about the sea and merpeople evey night and during the same his mind was filled with you. Every.fucking.day.

He was sick of it-and he actually felt really sick.

Steve was tired. His whole body ached. He felt dehydrated, even though he still tried drinking as much water as possible-or at least enough. He wasn’t hungry-and if he ate, he felt like puking.

Was it some Virus? But on the other hand…he couldn’t get sick. It was impossible. The serum prevented him from getting sick.

And he'd felt like he was back in his skinny body, the sickly boy once again getting a fever after being too long outside without a thick jacket.

He didn’t miss the time when he had been sick.

Yet it felt like those times were coming back.

Could the serum stop working? Is he turning into his skinny self again? They had told him it would be permanent..but on the other hand, nobody ever lived this long to actually tell how the serum worked. It’s not like the serum was really tested a lot.

He should probably go back to the compound. Get tested. Have them check him in the lab, give them his blood and…he really didn’t care, if he had to be honest with himself. He’d be fine with dying here. Doesn’t matter if as a super soldier or not. He just felt tired. Tired from the mission. Tired from heartbreak, tired from…being alive.

After patrolling the nearby areas Steve went back to his cabin, opening a beer and just sitting down in front of the fireplace, just thinking and staring into the fire.

The bitter taste of beer made him furrow his eyebrows a bit. It wasn’t good. He wouldn’t even feel it. No buzz from the alcohol. He’d probably need to drink a whole bottle of rum or tequila to feel at least a little buzz…but he wasn’t sure about it. Only some of Thors alcohol helped him to feel any of it.

Sighing Steve took another sip. This time bigger.

The bitterness was like a reflection of his sour mood.

When would those feelings go away? It started to get on his nerves. He had never mourned this much after Peggy, so why was he feeling like his heart was tearing apart more and more with every day. Every minute.

Would he ever feel whole again? Would it ever stop hurting this much?

He was so sick of living like this.

At this point he wasn’t sure if he wanted to live like this. His life felt rather…lifeless. He only spent his time with the mission and after just drinking tasteless beer.

It’s like the meaning of his life just disappeared.

And maybe it did.

With you.

Maybe you took part of his heart, unintentionally leaving him completely broken.

Sighing Steve took another sip, listening to the crisping fireplace. Maybe when he comes back to the compound he could-

A harsh knock made him jump a little bit as he immediately stood up and walked to the door. He hadn’t even noticed when he’d taken his gun from beneath the coffee table.

Nobody knew his location. Nobody would visit him here.

So who the hell was it? An enemy?

When he looked through the peekhole he quickly turned the key, nearly breaking it before opening the door with so much strength he could feel the handle being ripped in half.

His breath hitched. His heartbeat stopped for a second, before racing like crazy as he tried to keep himself calm.

It couldn’t be-that’s impossible.

How-

What-

“Mer?”

Thank you for reading! I hope you like it. Please let me know by reblogging and giving feedback! It makes a writer (me) very happy

If you have any questions, hc, Drabble ideas, ‘what if…’-> flood my inbox!



Taglist: @jamneuromain @buckystevelove @katzvelvet @feltonswifesworld87 @mylifeispainandiloveit @kneelforloki @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @bollzinurmouth @lilsiz @magnificentsaladllama wanna be tagged? Be active by reblogging and leaving feedback! I’ll remove those who aren’t active

[fornasedensgudar]

Hello! I have a questions but i'm not sure if there's even an answer: do you know whether there is a norse or continental germanic god/goddess that is associated with wind??

Oh Im so glad you asked because I love wind gods and spirits and I got two that I feel like almost no one outside of Scandinavia seemes to know about.

One is norse but not really germanic. The other, is not even norse just swedish af lol.

First I like to tell you about Kåre.

I bet most of you have never heard of him, but I also bet you heard of Ran, or Logi och Ägir.

As some may know, Ran is married to Ägir, a sea jötun. And I bet you know Logi, the jötun who is wild fire personified.

What does this have to do with Ägir? Well Ägir is listed as the brother of Logi and Ägir. Whos father Fornjot, is know in one saga to be the King of the swedish island of Gotland. (Perhaps a hint to an old cult or god of the island.)

These three sons of Fornjot personified the elements or the three most brutal aspects of nature, the wild deep seas, the every hungry wild fires and the ever harsh and cold northen wind. (With a father who rule over an island in the baltic sea that makes rather sense)

The name Kåre is also a swedish word describing a special form of wind or storm.

Kåre is also mentiond in Flatöboken and in one story in Fundinn Nóergr Kåre is the father of Frosti of the frost. But in Hversu the son is named Jökull wish means ice feald. This Jökull is in folklore (mostly in norway) said to be the father of old man winter.

So a lot of maybes here and things that hint he was more well known from Gotland to iceland and norway back in the day but a lot been lost.

But we do know he was a winter and wind jötun and one of the three elemental brothers.

My local group do offerings to him during winter and autum rituals but I know some pepole up north do as well. But overall hes rather forgotten compared to his brothers.

Here is a drawing of him by me:

THEN we get to the fun local part.

Ysätters-Kajsa!

Now who the heck is this and whats her deal?

Well Im from a Village called Asker, In Närke.

And back in the day, the farmers spoke about a troll by some, a Huldra by others and by some a spirit/creature who did not fitt any of the molds. Manny famous writers also wrote about her. Most famous of them all is Selma Lagerlöf.

Ysätters-Kajsas name came from the old Moss/lake in Ysätters thats said to be her home or birthplace, but she ruled the weather (but mainly wind) all over Närke but mostly Asker and the sorounding flat plains and fealds.

Ysätterskällan was likely an old offering place to what once was an old goddess or for spirits witch hints to her older roots before she was said to be an evil troll or forest spirit.

The Kajsa in her name is explained in a intervju with an old farmer from Asker in the start of the 1900s dokumentet in the book "Asker, Sant å sånt"

"that was just wat they named them trolls and giants back in the day"

That might seeme weird but tbh in the 1700s there are stories how pepole would toss coins to Kajsa of the sea while fishing.

Or in the 1800s when some in the Mountains and forest called forest and Mountain spirits for Kajsa as well.

It almost seemed as a form of a so called "noa-name" or maybe as the old man said: "it was just what them trolls was named back in the day."

(Im sure there is someone smarter here who can explain this weird Kajsa thing)

But ok, her wind aspect then?

Well first of all, its windy in East Närke.

Like the start of this old poem said

"Den ljuva Närke slätten, där enbart stormen består."

"The lovely Närke plains, where only the storm remains."

Also in manny stories she is said to controll wind and to travel by air.

In one story its said Ysätters-Kajsa looking down on Närke and was like "man this place is pretty, pepole have it good here, we cant have it like that."

And pretty much just made sure its always a bit windy and would play trick on the humans, making them get lost in forest, stealing laundry that hanged out to dry and in general just make the pepole of Närke just a little less comfy in their home.

But she is also a protector or the land!

In one myth, back in the day when a wild fire almost brought an end to the village of Asked she came to save the pepole, because even if she liked to play tricks on them she also deeply loved the pepole and needed them just as much as she they needed her.

So its said when the fire got to the center of the village, a woman was seen dancing up on the church towers roof and as she did storm clouds started to form and with wind and rain the fires was put out and the Village was saved.

Ysätters-Kajsa drawing by me:

This is also why my group call to her and giver her offerings for protection. Shes our local trickster and protector spirit of the wind.

But being a very Asker and Närke spirit. This is one I have to say I would think would be very weird and not really ok if like, pagans in america for some reason started to make offeings to. Because this is not just any big ol god or goddess. This is a local myth and spirit and part of my childhood and culture. I added a lot here from books just to get the facts right but I also just str8 up heared stories about her as a kid. She is just the protector of Asker and the bringer of wind in Närke.

Like if you dont live here, dont.

Go with Kåre then instead whos more wind in general.

But I had to share this about her becouse I just love her and wind spirits and gods in general.

Also, this is a good reminder to check what you have local, you might have myths and stories about old spirits and gods of the land you grow up and live in.

As I often say. The best way to do polytheism and anmism is to know and work with your local land and the spiritits and gods within said land. Because thats the best tools you got right here, right now. The land it self.

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

can you tell me more about draco and the northern oracle 🙏 i wanted to dive more into this when i saw your post about heavenly oracles but all that came up when i searched for the dragon was ladon

Ah yes, I know why that is.

Multiple myths can correlate to the same constellation. Capricorn, for instance, could be this one legendary seagoat who was memorialized for his bravery as a constellation OR it could be a representation of Pan's escape from Typhon as a seagoat.

The Draco constellation is like this - most will say it's to symbolize Ladon, the dragon who guards Hera's golden apples, while others will say the constellation itself is the earth-dragon of Koios's oracle.

Obviously, I think we all know which one I prefer lol

and!!! um!!! maybe I can tell you more, we'll see XD

So. I am of the mind that Draco and Python both coexisted with their respective Titan counterparts - Koios and Phoebe. They both witnessed the Titan War, and while Draco retreated inside Koios's oracle and kinda shut it down to a degree to keep it from falling into the gods' hands (because remember - Draco is on Koios's side here. He would do everything he could to keep it from Olympus.), Python remained neutral with Phoebe.

That is. Until he grew greedy. And wanted Delphi's power for himself. And then got slammed by her grandson lmao

BUT THIS ISN'T ABOUT HIM :D IT'S DRACO TIME :D

I imagine Draco to be kinda an icy-blue and white dragon, resembling the north but also the sky, because that's where he and Koios get their prophecies from (and I see Python as purple & green hence the Earth and all that hehe. Colors!!!).

AH I CAN SHARE MY HEADCANON ON WHERE I THINK THE ORACLE IS AT NOW :D

so context: Koios's oracle is to the North, but not like. the North Pole. The Ancient Greeks weren't aware of such a thing - sure, they believe Koios was the Northern pillar, but not like the North Pole.

This is important to know because Hyperborea, Apollo's eternal spring vacation suit, is located just below where Koios's oracle is!

SO IF WE TAKE OUT MY MAP HERE (yes I have a map for this. i have ADHD what do you expect?)

The Underworld River Eridanos runs through Hyperborea, as seen by the 34 Gray marker on the map^

Gray marker 32 is the location of the Rhipaion Mountains, where Boreas lives. This is the southernmost border of Hyperborea!

Originally I thought Eridanos was like. the Northern border - but no! Sources say that it's the River Oceanus instead.

But the thing is. For this river to be the northern border, then that means Hyperborea takes up like. Bulgaria to Poland. Lithuania. Till it hits the Baltic Sea, at least.

(Wait. oh my gosh...that's how Freypollo happens...ohmygosh EVERYONE I'VE FIGURED IT OUT!

ahem. saves for later <-ask me about it. please.)

anyway. SO THEREFORE HYPERBOREA IS LIKE. WHERE GRAY 33 IS. BUT ALSO FROM GRAY 32 AND UP.

Apollo really just went "See this? It's all mine now." lmaooo XD

that or Boreas was a really good boyfriend <-headcanon i could share too if anybody's curious hehe

BACK TO THE ORACLE NOW.

Delphi is the center of the world to the Ancient Greeks, so if we go North, Koios's would be right about...

Koios has friends in the Norse pantheon confirmed?

guys I'm just spitballing right now. but it makes sense too.

Ancient Greece was aware of the Norse, btw! and, funnily enough, they could have mythologicalized them as...the Hyperboreans.

Freypollo happened y'all it's all right here

And I'm not making that up! It's historically agreed upon that the Hyperboreans in mythology were probably mythological avatars of the Norse! Greece rarely interacted with them, but they still knew of the other's existence. In fact, they were in a bit of awe of the Norse if memory serves correctly lol

Fascinating. Amazing how it all fits together.

Of course, remember this is just me making a crack theory about this Really Obscure Thing so there may be something out there that doesn't add up with this and if there is I Will make it Work with this but all in all, I think it does make sense?

Like seriously I just pulled this out of my head. Only the part above the cut was prewritten but the rest was pure crack theory slammed down.

As for where I think Hyperborea and Koios's Oracle are in the RRverse...

Greenland be covered in snow, yes. But remember Hyperborea is a land of Eternal Spring and would not be deterred by that lol

Plus it'll be typical RRverse shenanigans for Eternal Spring to be in a Very Snowy place lmao

I was tempted to put Koios's Oracle at The North Pole but then I was like ehhh not very accessible, is it?

I can officially say this is my second theory lol hope you enjoyed the rabbit hole :3

[beardedmrbean]

Two families in East Germany, longing for freedom, built their own hot air balloon out of masses of taffeta, bought secretly in preparations that took more than a year.

They planned to flee and cross into West Germany in a daring plan put into action in September 1979.

They set out in their craft on a moonlit September night - after a failed attempt when they ran out of gas in the air and crashed into the bushes below.

However, they managed to reach the West in their second try, making it out of the country in a highly dramatic feat just before the East German police caught up with them.

The two families were dicing with death, as guards protecting the border in East Germany, then part of the Eastern Bloc, were ordered to use lethal force to prevent people defecting to the West.

The inner German border and the Berlin Wall were heavily fortified with watchtowers, land mines, armed soldiers and other measures to prevent illegal crossings.

"We didn't know anything about ballooning," says Günter Wetzel, 69, from one of the two families who managed to flee in their homemade balloon, who researched at length after a television programme provided inspiration.

When asked whether his dreams have been fulfilled in his new home, he replies soberly, "What do you mean by dreams?" Wetzel, who retrained as a car mechanic, was sure it would all work out.

His story was later made into several films. His character was played by US star Beau Bridges in the Disney film "Nightcrossing" and by David Kross in a German movie called "Balloon" (2018).

Sadly the films did not make him rich, however. "We were naive," he says, looking back.

Exploring the former death strip

A sign located on what used to be East Germany's infamous death strip now tells visitors about the balloon flight, known worldwide for its boldness.

Following World War II, Germany was divided for decades, separated by a lengthy border that can now be walked by hikers.

Where the death strip ran along the inner German border, there is now a green belt between the Saxon-Bavarian Vogtland region and the Baltic Sea.

Day trippers are drawn by the combination of forests, moorland, rivers, heathland and low mountain ranges.

Hiking journalist Thorsten Hoyer has covered 1,250 kilometres of the roughly 1,400-kilometre-long green belt in less than a month, but he does not recommend it, saying, "70% of it is over concrete and asphalt."

Nature is working on reclaiming the terrain, but has not yet managed completely.

The route is modelled on the Kolonnenweg on the east side, where the former East Germany border guards patrolled over perforated slabs.

Today, there is greenery everywhere along the path - though less in the way of tourist infrastructure and in places, there could be better signposting.

So it is better if cyclists and hikers focus on select routes, perhaps in the Franconian Forest where the states of Bavaria and Thuringia meet.

'Little Berlin'

The river Saale, once a border, flows leisurely along and builds up to a smooth surface near Hirschberg and is lined with trees and bushes, while canoeists rush over a weir. If you cycle along the colonnade path, watch out for the wide depressions in the concrete.

The situation eases on a forest path and the little road to Mödlareuth. Here, Americans used to call the village "Little Berlin."

Just like the German capital, Mödlareuth was divided by a wall and you can still visit the German-German Museum which has a memorial to the separation of the country. Visitors can also see a section of the Wall, and watchtowers and barbed wire fences bear witness to the painful division.

Britt Hornig, who is currently wandering through the museum grounds, is deeply moved and agitated. She used to work as a paediatric nurse in East Germany. "There can't be anything like this again. That was my childhood, my youth. It was absolute madness what they did to us."

"I went to the demonstrations in Leipzig every week and fought for freedom until the Wall came down."

Otto Oeder, a former border policeman and now 79 years old, also recalls the division. "I thought the world ended there," he says, describing his deployment on the Bavarian side of the Iron Curtain.

He wrote and published his book about those divided years, recalling refugees who made it through. "At our police station, we first dressed them in dry clothes, donated by us, not paid for by the state."

He also set up a regular meeting point in a pub for people who had crossed the border and could share their anecdotes. Anyone loyal to the East German regime was unwelcome.

Hiking through the past

Frankenwald-Steigla is the name of a network of circular hiking trails in the Franconian Forest, three of which illustrate the German-German past.

The Wetzsteinmacher trail, 5.3 kilometres long and starting below Lauenstein Castle, leads up to the Thüringer Warte. It is a viewing tower on the summit of the Ratzenberg and provides a fantastic vantage point to survey the area. Climb 117 steps and you can take in a view of the forests of the Thuringian-Franconian Slate Mountains.

Other climbs include the challenging Grenzer-Weg trail - 16.8 kilometres from Carlsgrün - and the moderate, recently inaugurated 10-kilometre Grünes Band trail, which starts in Mitwitz.

Along the way, a stream babbles and cuckoo calls echo through the forest. You can hear birdsong, while dewdrops sparkle like pearls on blades of grass. Dragonflies dance in the sun and it is so peaceful that you cannot imagine anything ever happened here.

[radical-aurin-care]

my year review

last new years', I made the resolution to not let fear stop me anymore from doing what I knew was right.

due to old as well as ongoing abuse, my entire life and personality had been shaped by fear since I was a baby (I'm late 30s now). so this was no easy thing to change. but I resolved to work on it and to work through my fear if it tried to stop me from doing what's right.

I was successful. I stood up to my harrassing nazi neighbour, I stopped putting up with bureaucratic abuse (which meant I stopped getting benefits which was SUPER scary but worth it to me!) and so on. mainly it meant standing up to abuse or getting away from it or just dealing with shit.

it meant valuing myself and my decisions and my agency and sovereignty over my own life and time and body.

it was a big fight and I coached myself through severe anxiety attacks many times especially in the beginning. but then due to steps I'd taken, these situations where the right thing was scary became less and less common AND it became second nature to me to face my fears. I feel like I no longer need a special reminder or promise to myself to stand up to fear and to abusers - I just do that now. and it's no longer AS hard.

the biggest leap I made was definitely moving away from germany, the land of my abusers and rapists and nazis and overbearing bureaucracy, to Finland, the land of everyone just leave me the fuck alone. and a thousand lakes.

I had no money except for some me and my roommate (we moved together) had begged off the Internet, just enough for deposit and first month's rent and train tickets to get here. we had a truly horrific ordeal, I mean wild adventure, getting here by train via denmark and sweden the long way around the baltic sea which we had to take because despite shengen (it's a LIE 😡) it was the only way to travel through the EU without passports. would have SO preferred to take a ferry otherwise!

we're both disabled and had to sleep in train stations and parks and on sidewalks and were chased away for sitting down and it was super hard and sweden fucking sucks. denmark too for their random passport checks on trains at the border to germany. but we were lucky.

we also had some fun and some lovely moments like busking in a small swedish town in summer (it gets warmer than you think) and the view from the train window when we were finally in Finland and saw the forests and lakes of Lapland go by.

and then we arrived in this empty neglected house with its beautifully overgrown garden (if only the previous tenants hadn't left trash lying around 😡) and had no furniture or even pots and pans or cutlery or plates, and no transportation and no citizen ID number. for the first weekend we had no electricity.

half a year later we're still missing some essential furniture (and means to earn money) but we made big progress turning this house into a home. we still struggle everyday just to get through it with cooking and chores (like carrying firewood and cleaning the fireplace and keeping the fire going cause that's our main heating (and don't even get me started on shovelling snow, it's not spoonie friendly)) eating all our spoons but it is worth it and we're making things better bit by bit.

I don't regret any of the leaps of faith I made this year. In fact I am proud as all get out of myself!

[unhonestlymirror]

America: I wonder how you four ended up being relatives, you look so... diverse.

Lithuania: *facepalm*

Latvia: Dude, THAT'S racist.

India: Wow, you sound just like your father, it gives me nostalgia! :D

Estonia: *tries not to laugh*

India: About 10 000 years ago, there lived a family of a hundred sons and one daughter. After a big war, the father, whose name was Bharata, was severely wounded and passed away without having time to write a will, so a squabble for power began. Brother turned on brother, everyone wanted to be the next ruler and marry their only sister, as pretty as lotus flower, the only woman who possessed the magical powers. The youngest son, a boy of extraterrestrial beauty and a kind heart, skin as an ivory, hair the ancient darkness of Vidisha, face a sculpture from Sravasthi, he didn't want to participate in those horrors, so he took his bow, arrows and Madu, and he went west to seek his fortune, leaving behind the saddened sister, who was too cowardly to give up everything she knew and leave, even if it meant losing all the power over her body. For many centuries, he wandered around the world like sun, saw thousands of different miracles, participated in thousands of different battles, made thousands of friends - but nowhere he felt like staying forever, nothing brought him a feeling of home. His soul and body were tired, he hated the sun itself, so he went north.

Lithuania: Oh, I know the rest, Curonia told me when I was little! Once, your brother reached the sea merging with the sky itself, bluer than turquoise. He couldn't have but fall into temptation to reach the Heaven Castle. He kept going many miles further ahead, and seeing that the sea didn't go any deeper, he lost his vigilance and track of time. Tired but inspired, he decided to catch himself some fish to eat. No one told him that sea was the local witch's property, whose peace no one dared to disturb for a long time.

Lithuania: Lightning of all colours scorched his ivory skin and long black hair, and the undercurrents dragged his limbs down the water. Jūratė was an asocial introvert, and she really didn’t like the smugglers who took all her amber and killed her fish. At first, she wanted to punish the stranger, but seeing his exhausted bloodless face, her heart was filled with pity, so she brought him to her Amber castle for interrogation.

India: I never liked that wicked daayan.

Lithuania: Well, mom wasn't that evil. After having a hearty lunch in a house made of sun, both made by a beautiful woman with golden hair and sapphire eyes, dad said he immediately fell in love with her. This made her laugh a lot, so she decided not to tell him that she almost killed him and the storm was her doing, and she put all the blame on the Thunder God.

Lithuania: However, when mom asked what his name was, he said something so difficult to pronounce that she asked: "Kas ir ta tauta?" - which means "What is your nation?" Dad didn't know any Baltic language back then, so he thought "kastaut" was some sort of friendly greeting. This word, eventually, became his new nickname. Nowadays, however, its form is Kastytis.

Latvia: Estonia called him Aesti, btw.

Lithuania: The moral of the story is that serious misunderstandings can not only destroy human relationships but also create them! :D

America: What a beautiful story.✨️

Latvia: And then they got married, had 10 children, and died in one day. Happy end.

Lithuania: You sound sarcastic.

Latvia: Wow, no way.

India: So basically, you three are the only alive sons of my brother.

Latvia: Nuh-uh, it's Liet only. Estonia is the oldest of us all, and he's our bro not by blood but by soul, we went through a lot of shit together during Livonian Order occupation, russian empire, nazis, soviets... I'm the proud child of Kurzeme and Latgale. Zemgale as well, but it's complicated.

India: Wait, so you're the grand kid? ...Why do Lithuania and Latvia call each other brothers then, not "nephew" and "uncle"?

Lithuania: It’s complicated.

Latvia: He's too Polish to be my uncle.

Lithuania: Shut up, my German nephew.💢

Latvia: Uno reverse, Estonia is your uncle.

Estonia: Please stop, I don't want to be anyone's uncle XD

[drev-the-procrastinator]

I would like to know more about the fish in your profile pic. :)

oh!!! of course!!! gladly :) here's a full picture of the little fella:

so this guy's a Perca fluviatilis, or European perch, or just a perch, or in Finnish, ahven!

It's a predatory fish that lives in both fresh and brackish water, so here in Finland, dotted with over 180 000 lakes (albeit most are very small) and surrounded by the brackish waters of the Baltic Sea (or It��meri in Finnish, which is funny because it means the East Sea even though from Finland said sea is to the west, but it's a direct translation from Swedish, to whom it is in the east lol anyway), it's a very common fish. In fact, it's the most common fish in Finland! There are a lot of little lakes and ponds in which it might be the only fish. It's also the national fish of Finland!

The important characteristics are the red (or really orange usually) fins and tail, the darker stripes, and the spikey dorsal fin, with the little black dot at the end towards the tail. In some of the darkwater lakes they can get almost black, though, so the stripes aren't always visible, but for example in the sea, where the water is clearer, you can see them well.

They can grow pretty big, but are usually 15-30 cm and weigh at most something like 350 grams, though occasionally bigger fish are found. When it comes to people who fish for fun, and not like, with big ships, the perch is the most commonly fished fish in Finland, I think? They can also withstand waters quite a lot acidic than most Finnish fish, which contributes to them living in tiny bog ponds as the only fish in there. Mostly they live in Europe (aside from Spain and Italy) and all the way to the Kolyma River in the Russian far east, but they've been planted in places such as Australia, New Zealand/Aotearoa, South Africa and even China I think? Where they're endangering the native fish species :[ so that's not good

They're pretty curious little fishies! They live in schools of fish during the day and look for food together, but at night they rest on their own at the bottom of the body of water they live in. A few times, when I've gone swimming in a lake with clear water, I've spotted them in the shallow water rather close to people swimming, and when I stayed in place for long enough they came really close a few times! I could've almost touched them, but they're also really fast, so they would've (and probably did) sprint away.

I've caught them a few times, but the ones I've fished have been too small so I've let them go. When my dad's side of the family used to have the cottage in the archipelago my mom has now, my grandparents used to put out the fishing nets (I helped a few times as well!) and then in the morning I'd help take the fishes out of the net, and there'd be perch there pretty often. I've also filleted these fish, and eaten them haha. My favorite is perch covered in flour and fried in butter, served with mashed potato! But most of all I do like just watching them :)

A couple more fun facts! They have a sharp boney spike at the edge of their gill cover, so you have to be careful when you hold them for example taking it off a hook! And the spikes on their back! They're very spiky fish :D

The word for ahven here in Russian is окунь, okun', which according to a version of the etymology, comes from the old word for eye, oko. In Finnish, ahven is pretty close to the reconstructed Proto-Finnic form *ahvën, but we don't know what the etymology for that is! The name for the fish is really similar in most Finnic languages though:

Lastly, the Finnish name for the big island and autonomous region of Åland is Ahvenanmaa, with ahvena being a dialectal form of ahven, and thus the name is like, the land of the perch :) It might come from the fact that in the 1500s, the people from there paid their taxes in perch? The etymology on that one is a little unlcear still! Just a fun little fact. :)

Here's a picture of a little ahven I took in 2018!

I just really like them :) ahven my beloved <3 <3 <3

[ambiguousthoughtsinsilence]

my year of boygenius

Why do we listen to music? Is it just melodic noise that provides background to our daily existence or is it a space where we look for meaning, purpose and beauty? This is a false question, as music can be all of these things, but it is so much more. For many people, the beauty of music gives their life meaning, whether listening or creating it. Most of us will have fond memories of listening to the radio in the car or discovering an album that transported us to a seemingly magical place, expanding our understanding of what music could be and do (e.g. Jeff Buckley’s Grace for me).

Growing up in a relatively small town by the Baltic Sea, one of my favourite activities was to go to the seaside in winter, when it was stripped of human presence, sit down on the staircase of a lifeguard’s lookout and listen to the songs on my iPod. Years before that I had a silver cassette player and a CD player that I always carried with me, along with a CD wallet. Music has always been a comforting presence in my life. But even in this rich history, there are certain albums and artists that have had such a transformative impact on my life that they have become part of who I am. There are not many albums that fall into this category, but this year one of them did appear.

In March, 2023 the record had come out, the first full LP from boygenius. As I listened to it for the first time, I knew it was going to embed itself in my brain as I was going to play it again and again and again. I became obsessed with the record and the three women responsible for creating it - Lucy Dacus, Julien Baker and Phoebe Bridgers.

It was like being a teenage girl again, eagerly watching interviews, trying to find out ways in which to watch their Coachella performances and following a fan account that reposted every live video and tour photo imaginable. People always talk about separating art from the artist, but the songs on the record felt so grounded and rooted in familiarity, like they were made by people that felt real and compassionate and vulnerable. In interviews they would talk about books and artists they admired and how they valued each other, and for someone, who has long felt that romantic love should not be valued more than friendship, it felt almost revolutionary to hear that as a foundation of an indie ‘supergroup’s’ ethos.

In August I had a chance to attend Oyafestivalen with my best friend Tina, who had very kindly gifted me a ticket. boygenius were due to play in the early hours of the evening. This was my first time seeing them live.

‘I want to hear your story / And be a part of it’ / boygenius- without you, without them

Making meaningful connections with other people is probably one of the, if not the most, important things you can do with your life. As I stood on a lawn in Oslo and kept bawling my eyes out, I couldn’t help, but end up in existential ponderings about love, loneliness and human connection and the fact that my closest friend was sharing the gig with me. We live thousands of km apart, but I love her loads and appreciate that she’s a part of my life.

‘And it feels good/ To be known so well/ I can’t hide from you / Like I hide from myself’ / boygenius- true blue

After the concert ended, I sat down by a tree to regain my composure, tear streaked cheeks and red eyes, an emotional outpouring and connection that meant so much to me. A few weeks later, I saw them headlining at Gunnersbury Park, this time sharing it with Tina again and my other friend Peter. This experience was less rooted in existential ponderings and more just an overwhelming sense of joy. It was a scorchingly hot day and multiple people fainted, however everyone around helped to get those people taken care of as quickly as possible.

Queer care and joy was ever present in this audience, people had arrived with wonderfully crafted items of clothing or little references to boygenius lyrics on them. Tina and I handed out pink carnations to the younger girls behind us. There is something strange about loving a band, whose audience seems much younger than you are, but maybe the best kind of music manages to reach something within us that is shared, regardless of age.

As the fireworks went up into the dark night sky, I felt so much joy. This time their music had reached the part of me that felt an immense gratitude for being alive and being able to experience such happiness with more than 20’000 people. This performance felt even more explosive and raw, but also funny and deeply meaningful. It seemed that all of us were treating ourselves to some self-belief.

‘will you be a nihilist with me / if nothing matters, man that’s a relief / Solomon had a point when he wrote Ecclesiastes/ if nothing can be known, then stupidity is holy / if the bore becomes a void, we’ll treat ourselves to some self-belief’ / boygenius - Satanist

The last time I saw them live was thanks to Peter, in a small and intimate acoustic set in Kingston. It was another very special experience as the songs had become embedded in my brain and hearing them acoustically felt quite different from the previous shows with a full backing band, here were the three people who were responsible for all those captivating melodies. They embody a vulnerable compassion and a reliance on friendship that feels authentic, and it is wonderful to see creativity blossom from a place of deep love and appreciation for each other.

The record is an album I have grown to love deeply, because it seems to fit whatever mental state I am in. Without You, Without Them for when I want to remind myself of the love I feel for my friends, Cool About It as a reminder that all of have had to play it cool, when someone has hurt us deeply, Not Strong Enough and Anti-Curse for when my mental health lies somewhere in the bottom of the bin. Whatever I am going through, I can find comfort in knowing that the record is there to give me solace and company, whether I am staring at the ceiling or going on a walk around North London.

[doraambrose]

One thing I wanted to mention with my previous post regarding jason Todd's canonical race is the evidence of eye color. And I know that this is a fictional world full of magic and aliens and resurrection from the dead like daily, but I 100% used this topic as an excuse to do a bunch of research on eye color as a huge science (mainly genetics) nerd. Don't judge.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, I'll link my previous post here:

While it's not impossible for people of races other than caucasian to have blue eyes, it's very uncommon.

Disclaimer: most of the stuff I say is theorized based on our understanding of human evolutionary patterns and genetics, but not everything is officially proven. The conclusions that I draw from the facts I listed are my own theories and interpretations of results, but I could not find a whole lot of information to support or dispute them

Basically, everything I have found to be factual is this:

Eye color is related to the main pigment in the eye: dark brown melanin.

Blue eyes are the result of a genetic mutation that is believed to have been an ancestral founder effect, originating in Europe around the Baltic Sea (theorized, study linked below)

Blue eyes, in simplest terms(because eye color, like skin color, is not controlled by just one gene and can't be determined by a simple momohybrid/dihybrid cross) is a recessive phenotype and brown eyes are considered a dominant phenotype.

Regionally, blue eye frequency is lowest in African and Asian countries, and other areas closer to the equator ( that was my own interpretation of results)

It is theorized that the "original humans" or oldest known evidence of human life were black and seemed to originate in the African region

It is also theorized that caucasians originated due to a genetic mutation that allowed immigrants to populate latitudes where too little ultraviolet B light for vitamin D production penetrates the atmosphere.

It is universally assumed by scientists studying human evolution that the need to make more vitamin D at northern latitudes drove genetic mutations that reduce the production of the pigment melanin

So, what conclusions can be drawn from this?

Well, one thing is that a possible explanation for the lack of blue eyes in people of color is simply that they don't have a lot of ( and for some, if any) caucasian ancestry. That means it wouldn't be possible to "obtain" the blue eye gene genotypes. And since blue eyes are recessive, the only ways a person could have the blue eye phenotype is if both their parents were carriers, one had the phenotype and the other was a carrier, or both had the phenotype. And I know unusual things happen where dark-skinned people have blue eyes, but it's more common for POC to have blue eyes if they have enough caucasian ancestry to inherit the recessive blue eye genotypes.

So what does this have to do with Jason Todd?

Well, him and both of his biological parents had blue eyes. That + their pale features (and Sheila's blonde hair) mean that they're all most likely white or more caucasian than any other race.

Even Willis. Even if certain other features provide some evidence of asian or indigenous ancestry, his last name + his blue eyes show that he's most likely more caucasian than any other race.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk and thank you for letting me geek out about the wonders of eye color genetics and how it relates to human evolution.

If you're also into that stuff, here are the studies I referenced:

[soaps-hoe-141]

Back Together

Part 31

Pairing: Soap x Ghost

WC: 4.6k

Synopsis: Oh shit he's remembering things

Warnings: Brief mentions of past torture and rape

The car ride felt like a lifetime. His mind was hyperfixating on the memories of being so pissed off he could barely think, the screams he remembered turning his throat sore while dogs tore apart his body, Ilya doing the same thing with his knife. He only wished the man had stopped at his body, instead he’d kept going until his mind had fallen apart as well. Every thought pounded in his head, his eyes shut tight against the light filtering in through the window while Ghost drove. It all played on repeat, drowning him in a sea of pain and misery.

“Soap?” Ghost’s voice cut through the waves and he glanced over at the man. There was a worried look there but he stayed focused on the road for the most part if only to ensure they didn't crash into the median.

“No, you don’t get to do that. Not to me, not right now. Christ Ghost,” he shook his head and looked up at the blue sky, anger pulsing through his mind. “We can talk when I get back, but you don’t do that to me, never again.” And then he’d left him standing there on the tarmac, staring after him and for what? To go spend weeks in a snow covered forest and even miss Christmas with his family for yet another year. He remembered being upset about it, leaving Ghost behind and being unable to finish their conversation, he knew he had wanted to stay then and discuss what it was Ghost was never supposed to again. But the anger and the need to flee some act he’d felt was committed against him outweighed those feelings nearly tenfold, a sense of almost betrayal at Ghost’s actions. And his family he’d known would be upset he was missing again for yet another year. He remembered thinking that there would be other Christmases, other holidays he would be able to see them, other days. There nearly hadn’t been.

The Scotsman looked down at his hands and answered quietly, “You aren’t going to ask me what happened Ghost? In there I mean, with command.”

He saw a shrug in the corner of his eye before Ghost rumbled out, “Figured you’d tell me if you wanted to. Whenever you were ready.”

How could this man have warranted anger like he’d felt, the hurt that had coursed through him nearly as thick as his blood? How could Ghost make him hurt so bad when his patience, his loyalty, and his friendship seemed so undoubted now? The man hadn’t left even for a day at the hospital, he’d been there every fucking second. Why couldn’t he just fuckin remember? He poked and prodded at the mesh that kept his memories from him, the voice in his mind, the dead man, begging him to stop but his begging fell on deaf ears as he kept trying.

His fists clenched, the tendons in his hands sending pain up his arm before he finally got his mouth around to answering Ghost, “They showed me the video, the footage of when I was taken. I remembered some things you know.” He could barely see it, just the slightest hint of his shoulders lifting beneath his shirt that gave away the tension he so obviously felt, “Apparently the video from that reporter made it out somehow, I saw you break the camera so thanks for that one I guess.” His mind was still bouncing around from thought to thought, bringing him back to the memory as he asked, “Why haven’t you ever asked me what happened in that factory? In between the videos I mean. What Ilya didn't show the world?”

Ghost swallowed, he could see the bob of his throat even through the thick fabric of his balaclava. It took a second before the big man finally answered, “You never asked me what happened when I was held captive. Didn’t want to make things worse for you I guess. Wouldn't want someone poking around where I didn't want them.”

Soap nodded quietly, opening a fist to run his finger over the scar on his palm, the memory making it ache before he said quietly, “They locked me in a room. No light, pure baltic, had me soakin wet. Left me in there til I was half dead with the cold, till I couldnae feel anything on my body. Not until they came back anyway, then they’d shoot me up with something that felt like fire inside ya. Warmed me up too quick, I wanted to tear my own skin off my body, couldnae stay still even when they were beating me for it. Made my heart race and my head pound but they needed me to be able to feel. Otherwise what was the point, you know?” Blue eyes shifted to the man who was silent, catching a wince in those eyes. “They waited too long one time. Don’t know what they were planning to do but they cut the tape on my feet so I kicked one of them in the nose. I never saw him move after that. I was almost out, almost free, had the other big bastard knocked out but they hit me over the back of the head with something.”

There was a pause, a lull in the conversation while Soap tried to reign in the fear of retelling his memories and Ghost remembered the man that he and Konig had found dead. “We saw him dead when we were clearing the factory.”

Another quiet moment prevailed, both of them taking in the silence as the truck rumbled beneath them. There was a slow nod from Soap as he continued, “Yeah that was Alexei. Ilya told me I killed him before he put the screws through my hands.” He swallowed hard, fingers reaching up to pull at the black mask he’d slid back over his face when they'd gotten into the truck, pulling at the hem to ensure his face was still covered. A hollow comfort he’d found in the black fabric. “By that point I couldn’t remember barely anything though, I was losing myself I think. When the camera turned off he stuck a metal rod to my back, burned the fuck out of me I don't even remember how many times. The worst part though? It made me hungry. How do you smell your own burning flesh and get hungry, Ghost?” He felt a sob trying to claw out of him, but forced it back down, blinking a couple times to clear his eyes before he ended up bawling in this man’s passenger seat.

The man beside him cleared his throat before answering, “They were starving you Soap. The mind will do anything to keep itself alive.” Eyes burned him until he finally looked up, catching sight of the hazel depths he wished he could live in for the rest of time. He’d be safe there, that he knew for a fact.

Finally the Scotsman managed a nod, “I guess. It was then I really started forgetting I think. I couldn’t remember anyone, their faces. The team’s faces. I didn’t have anybody to keep me going then, I just knew I was going to die alone and I didn’t want anyone to see that. I knew that I wasn’t me, if that makes sense.” He glanced up to find Ghost giving him an understanding nod and a voice in his mind whispered, ‘He knows better than anyone else ever could.’ There was a feeling that made it very clear the voice was speaking the truth, only Ghost knew what he was feeling right now. “After they stopped the recording, when the gun went off Ilya,” the name drew a shiver from him still whenever he spoke or heard it. “Ilya left me with that man you found me killing. He- He uh,” the words refused to come out. No one had been privy to this information yet, not a single soul on the hospital staff and not even command when they'd been pressing him for information.

There was another strangled sob in his throat that he disguised as a cough as the memory lit up his mind. “You don’t have to tell me if you aren’t ready Soap,” fucking Christ why did he have to be so patient. It made him weak, made him feel fragile when all he wanted was to feel like a force of nature again. To be the man he'd seen in that footage earlier, unstoppable even on the brink of death, “I’m sorry that you had to go through that, all of it. Especially alone.”

The words had his chest tightening before he sniffed quickly, wiping the tears before they spilled. He wasn’t going to cry, not now. Soap knew that he had to be able to recount his experience, and no one made him feel safer, like he could tell them without judgment, than the man beside him. Memory of anger or not, he knew Ghost cared about him enough that he wouldn’t feel ashamed the second he said it. “The man you and Konig found me with. When Ilya left he, uh, he raped me, Ghost.” There it was, and when he looked up he saw an even expression staring back at him. Hands tightened on the steering wheel turning his bare knuckles even whiter than they already were. “More than once.” His stomach twisted painfully at the memory watching the Lieutenant’s reaction and fearing the worst.

Ghost only gave him a quiet nod and answered, “I’m sorry. We should have been there sooner and I’m sorry for that.” The emotions licked at the edges of the dam, threatening to spill over. Threatening to cut straight through the thick walls he’d been steadily building.

When he turned his eyes back to the road the shame still burned. Admitting that another person had violated him, and another man at that, made his skin crawl, the memories surging around him not helping in the slightest. "It wasn't your fault. I killed that one too but you already knew that." He saw Ghost nod, glancing up when the truck turned sharply into the parking lot of an apartment complex. He still didn't remember the place, his brows furrowing as he tried to recall the information. "What's this?" He turned a questioning look towards Ghost.

The big man gestured with a nod, "Your apartment complex. You live right up there." When Soap turned his eyes up, looking at the place with even more confusion, the big man asked, "Do you not remember it?"

His head shook and Soap answered, "This place doesn't look right. Doesn't feel like home. Are you sure?" Blue eyes shot to the driver who gave him a quick nod in answer. Soap sighed and shrugged, "Maybe I'll remember when we get inside then." He opened the door and headed for the stairs, hand digging in his pocket for the set of keys he had. Ghost was right behind him as he climbed the stairs slowly, a woman passing by them and giving the both of them a weird glance before hurrying past not wanting to get mixed up in whatever they were doing. 

Soap stopped when Ghost cleared his throat, turning to watch the man glance at the door he'd passed. He stared at it for a long moment before surprise found his eyes, "Oh! Oh right. Sorry." He slid his key into the lock, trying to turn it though it stuck, not wanting to respond properly. A sheepish look found his gaze as he glanced up sideways at Ghost muttering again, "I'm sorry," pulling the keys out of the lock they fell to the ground. "Shite, I'm sorry," his voice was beginning to wobble, the emotions of the day threatening to drown him once more. He reached down picking the set of keys up and trying again, and still the door stayed stubbornly locked in front of them. "Fuck, I-I’m sorry."

"It's ok Soap, let me try," the large hand reached out for the keys which the Scotsman readily handed over. When the key still wouldn't turn even for the big man they glanced at one another. "It's alright come on," Ghost motioned for him to follow as they headed back down the stairs to the office on the first floor.

A skinny middle aged man opened the door when the Lieutenant knocked. "Um, what can I do for you?" He was looking between the both of them obviously confused as to why they were at his door right now.

Ghost lifted the keys in his hand, "Doesn't work." The man's brows furrowed and the Lieutenant clarified, "Apartment 307, key doesn't work. Last name MacTavish"

The landlord's brows rose then, seemingly surprised, "You mean the young man from the news? John MacTavish? He's dead and his lease was up. No one ever came to collect his things so we gave someone else the lease."

Hollow, that was how he felt. Not even his name could break through that shell that he'd been building to protect himself from something like this. Blue eyes fell to the ground, missing the heat of anger that flared in Ghost's eyes before the big man asked, "So then where are his things? What'd you do, throw them out?"

The man answered quickly, seeming to fear his demise at the behemoth standing in front of him, "N-No sir. We sold them to a second hand store down the road. The furniture was still good and they agreed to take the personal items as well so they just came in and cleaned out the apartment. Clothes, furniture, everything."

Ghost was staring hard now, and when Soap looked up he could see the rage just barely contained there. Rather than let it burst out on the man he tugged at the dark shirt he was wearing, getting the attention of those hazel eyes and muttering, "Let's go Ghost." It was hard to control the tears welling up now as he turned and headed back for the truck. He was so tired, he'd been through PT, an interrogation by his own commanding officers, and now this shit that was all just snowballing at this point. When he finally made it back to the black truck, leaning against it for a moment to rest his leg, everything was starting to spill over.

When the other man came around his shoulder, worried eyes looking down at him he couldn't take it anymore. He shot forward, arms wrapping around a thick torso as his body shook with quiet sobs, hiding his face from the Lieutenant, hiding his shame and his fears and his tears. They flowed freely now, unstoppable as the dam shattered inside him. Everything he'd had to deal with, every emotion he'd been subjected to since his capture, every ounce of pain that ripped through his body every time he fucking moved found its way onto the black shirt Ghost was wearing. The scent of pine enveloping him in a cocoon, protecting him from the rest of the world as arms wrapped hesitantly around his back. The big man was unsure still, worried he might just make things worse but when Soap's face pressed into the valley between his pecs and his body came flush with the other muscled frame they both sank into the touch. "Hey Johnny it's ok shh."

That nickname should have made him flinch, should have made him want to get away, but it didn't stop at the first four letters of his name. 'Johnny.' Memories surged from behind the fraying mesh that had been holding them at bay. Pouring into his mind with cruel intent. 'Johnny, we're Johnny. Only Lt calls us Johnny.' The dead man spoke in his mind and not even the well of his tears could stop him from sputtering out, "Only you call me Johnny, Lt."

Face still buried he felt arms pull him closer, a chin resting on the top of his head as the man whispered an answer, "That's right Johnny. No one else, just me." The Scotsman could only manage a nod, the sobs retaking their hold on his stuttering breaths.

------- (Ghost POV)

He was barely holding it together. Ever since he'd squatted behind that door listening to Soap's panic attack through the door he'd barely been keeping hold of his own emotions. Never, in a million years, would he have thought that this man, this Scotsman he'd once been so exasperated by, could take over his mind so completely. This man, his Scotsman, could bring him so close to the emotional edge that he was nearly tipping into the boiling volcano that were his feelings. Soap was clinging to him so tightly it was nearly squeezing the breath from his lungs and all he could think was, ‘Fuckin finally’.

Ghost couldn't believe it, the Sergeant was actually touching him. Seeking comfort in the embrace that had been glaringly absent until now. His own arms were wound tight around him, providing the safety and comfort that Soap was so desperately searching for. Nothing could have pulled him away from this moment. Relief was washing over him while he finally got to touch him again after fearing that he’d never get the opportunity to do so again. He only wished it was under better circumstances, that this wasn't merely a bandage for the open wound that he knew was in Soap's heart right now.

It wasn't until those sobs finally faded, and the salty tears that were soaking the front of his shirt were beginning to dry that the face buried in his chest finally pulled backwards. He lifted his chin, glancing down into azure hues he'd once feared that he'd never see again. "Better Johnny?"

There was a slow nod before the strained voice answered, "Much, Lt."

"Then let's go get your stuff back," they separated slowly. Soap had to take a moment to regain his balance with his stiff leg before he headed around the truck to the other side. They both climbed in, the Lieutenant reaching forward to turn the radio on quietly knowing that the Scotsman had always preferred it to the quiet of riding.

He felt eyes watching him, for once it was him who a hole was being bored into. “I remember some things Ghost,” there was a quiet glance in the direction of the other man before he gave a low grunt, questioning what it was. “I remember that I nearly died when we fell out of a plane,” he nodded along quietly letting the Scotsman recount his memories in his own time. “I remember the city where we found Suheil. You and I, we were partnered up together. I killed a kid in the stairwell,” he saw the eyes fall down to his hands, both of them remembering the child they’d seen hiding underneath the stairs. “But we saved Konig,” a bit of the light came back in his eyes, “We saved someone at least. So we do save people?” The azure eyes found him again and Ghost gave another quiet nod, feeling a bit of relief when he saw the Scotsman take a deep breath.

When the truck pulled into the parking lot the big man parked and turned to look at Soap in the passenger seat. “We do save people Johnny, and you’re not a bad man. You gave that boy a quick death, it was better than what he was going to get otherwise.” The Scotsman nodded slowly, still sorting through the memories that were coming back before he cleared his throat and nodded towards the store, “Come on, let’s go get your stuff?”

The store was small, and for the most part devoid of other patrons. The young girl behind the register didn’t even look up when they entered, not until the two men neared and her eyes blew so wide he was afraid they were about to pop out. She blanched at the both of them until Johnny asked, “Hey did you pick up some things from an apartment complex recently? Furniture, clothes, some personal things?” The poor teenager was eyeing them both now, gaze flicking back and forth between them. Completely unable to answer the two men both wearing balaclavas like they’d just come straight from a bank heist or something.

It wasn’t until an older woman came out from the back that someone actually spoke to them, “Oi! Can I help you two with something?” Both of their heads turned to find her as she walked their way, “Well? Can I?”

Ghost looked down at Soap, staying quiet now that the Scotsman seemed to be feeling a bit more like his talkative self. “Yeah, I’m trying to find my things. The apartment complex down the street sold all my stuff to ya and I was wondering if ya could help me find it.”

The woman glanced between the both of them before asking, “You mean the apartment they hired us to clean out cause that kid didn’t renew his lease?” Soap gave her a quick nod in answer, “We’ve sold just about everything already. The furniture some university kids got and the clothes went to one of those homeless shelters, doubt you’ll ever get either of those back.”

His face fell, Ghost could see the light that had been reignited beginning to dim again and it hurt him deeper than he ever thought it could. In that place that he still wasn’t sure was real, the soul that lived only when Soap was around to make it so. It was that dying light he could see in his eyes that finally had Ghost speaking up, “What about the pictures and things? The personal stuff that you took.”

It took her a moment as she tried to think and then she gave them both a shrug, “I’m not sure really. I’m sure some of it is still back there but I haven’t been able to do inventory yet this week.” Soap took a step back, eyes casting down to the floor so lost in his mind again Ghost knew he’d have done anything to stop his racing thoughts. The woman got around to it first though, “If you want you can go have a gander lads. Please, just don’t steal anything, yeah? We sell things to people who need them ok, we barely make ends meet as it is. You promise you won’t steal anything and you’re free to go have a look.”

Azure eyes lifted to her and the Scotsman gave a quick nod, “Thank ye, ma’am. I appreciate it, I really do.” The light returned and he felt at ease once more, giving the woman a quick nod as well as she led them into the back where countless things were strewn about haphazardly.

They both moved slowly into the backroom as the woman disappeared with a cart of things to fill the shelves of her small store. Ghost looked around at everything and then gestured towards the other side of the room, “I’ll take one side, you take the other?”

Soap gave him a slow nod, “Aye, sounds good to me Lt.” And so they split up, one of them going one way and the other heading off to the far side. They cleared the room not unlike they swept through buildings when they were training. It was careful and methodical, both searching for anything that might have belonged to the Sergeant before being ripped from his apartment indelicately.

He was rummaging through a stack of books when the one next to it fell over. Hazel eyes widened, “Fuck,” he muttered quietly as he began to restack them neatly like they had been arranged before he’d messed them up. When he turned to pick one up though he froze, staring down at a sketch of himself, well of his mask anyway. His hands froze, hovering over the sketch and feeling a sense of deja vu, like he’d done this before. Seen drawings he wasn’t supposed to have seen.

It took a few moments to compose himself before he reached down to pick up the sketchbook that was sitting open to the world now. He swallowed hard, flipping through the pages slowly. Every single one was of him, standing on the tarmac with his helmet on about to ship off at General Shepherd’s command. In the downed helicopter while they were fighting for their lives and those of the rest of the team stuck inside with them. When they’d found the missile container and had to report it to that traitorous American bastard. He flipped through them with greedy eyes, heart racing in his chest and feeling emotions finally after holding them at bay for so long now.

He’d almost lost this man completely, and he had lost a part of him in that factory that he doubted he’d ever get back. Ghost had refused to let himself think about it until now, until Soap had cried into his chest shaking in his arms. That had nearly broken him then and there, but this? This was breaking him, cutting through him so easily he didn’t even feel the tears on his face until they were soaking into the balaclava and falling onto the pages.

He flipped to the last page, staring down at his face, eye black still covering his eyes and scars drawn so prominently. It was before they’d gone after Graves when he’d first taken off the mask in front of Soap. He lifted a clenched fist to his mouth, shoulders hunching as he fought to control himself. Soap had nearly died, he had lost himself in that factory and he hadn’t been able to stop it, hadn’t even been able to comfort him. And now here he was lying to the poor man, hiding their relationship and their fight like an idiot.

“I felt like I was intruding on your privacy so I stopped drawing.” The Scotsman’s voice was quiet behind him. It was Ghost’s turn to feel like a mess though, voice caught in his throat and refusing to turn around to meet the eyes he knew were on him now. Soap came into view at his side then, fingers running over the drawing lightly before he turned to look up at him. “It felt wrong to draw your face without your permission, Simon.” A strangled sound ripped out of his throat then, it was the first time he’d heard his name come out of Soap’s mouth since he’d been back.

The big man turned slowly, afraid he might do something hasty if he wasn’t careful, afraid that he’d end up hurting Soap even more than he already had. He didn’t have to make the first move though, that was what Soap was good at, he always had been. Arms slipped around his torso and his reaction was immediate and instinctual. Ghost pulled the masked face against him, his tears soaking Johnny’s shirt this time.

“I’m so sorry Johnny,” he felt like he was losing himself in the scent of sandalwood and trying to drown himself in it. It’d been absent for so long he had been certain he’d never get to breathe it in again. “I missed you so much sweetheart.” His fingers curled into the muscle of his shoulder, hanging on for dear life as he tried to ground himself with the weight of the man in his arms.

Soap’s fingers rubbed into his back slowly before he whispered back, “It wasn’t your fault, Ghost.” A soothing noise came from the Scotsman before he whispered again, “I missed you too, m’eudail.”

[glaucidiumpasserinum]

WHAT IF...

Oh look, it lives :D Apologies for the silence, as usual, life ran away with my free time. Doesn't mean I wasn't doing art stuff in between though (even if it was just small stuff). The amount of photos yet to be edited also keeps on growing /).(\

But we're not here to talk about that. This little card made its way into bakkacosplay's hands during DoKomi 2024 (together with a playmobil Kakashi and some rocks&fossils from the Baltic Sea to replace lost beads from her Mononoke cosplay). So my brain came up with the idea of our most beloved captains sharing a break together after training their unruly kids. Probably spent in relaxing silence after complaining about ending up with the unholy trio of edgy, easily excitable and hopelessly in love. "At least yours weren't TWELVE when you got them and had something resembling field training." - "No amount of field training prepares you for giants trying to eat you." Feel free to give the lady's profile some love and support (and consider plastering your walls with prints from her webshop like I did :D ).

[nehswritesstuffs]

fly little seagull, the world awaits - Part 3 of 4

Alright, so I know that Oda-sensei said that Law would be German if he was from the real world--now work with me here--let us please entertain the idea that he is very specifically Northern German. Extra-specifically a native Low Saxon speaker (like, all of it, not getting that deep in lol) who then used German or whatever as a prestige/professional/educational language. Why? Because look at the man: think of him on the coast of the North Sea, staring out at the ocean and being particularly brooding. I will also accept the Baltic. It just fits, okay? Additionally: Wikipedia linking to the same article in other languages is honestly some of the tightest shit and this is not the first fic I’ve used that tactic for (and if anyone more informed wishes to correct me, then please do! I’m doing my best, but I can be better).

Chapter 1 on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3] 

Chapter 2 on [tumblr] - [FFN] - [AO3]

Law learns what Cora-san possibly felt thirteen years ago in probably the worst way possible. [9709 words; AU where Law realizes he accidentally became a dad while staring down canon events]

It was later that evening, with all the Hearts on the Polar Tang and the vessel having set sail for the next island. Law had Penguin and Shachi in his cabin, sitting on his bed as he explained his plan from his desk chair with detached, clinical precision. Though there was no real vice-captain or second-in-command in the traditional sense, such duties often fell on the ones who had been around the longest, with Penguin and Shachi routinely proving the most capable. The two men in front of him took in every word with the gravity he hoped they would; the future was hinging on it.

“You trust Fred?” Shachi asked, raising an eyebrow.

“She and Bepo remember each other, and she’s been able to tell him things only she could know—there’s no way that they’re not cousins. Acting in our absolute best interest? Possibly not. But she was definitely not lying when she said guests were welcome and they’d protect you and Nauja.”

“I still don’t see why we can’t come along on your revenge mission to help make sure you don’t die,” Penguin frowned. “I mean… it’s always been the four of us.”

“…and this is between Doflamingo and me; always has been.” Law exhaled heavily and scratched his scalp. “As much as I want my lieutenants by my side, I don’t want to put anyone in danger.”

“You can risk our lives, you know,” Penguin insisted. “That’s part of what being a captain is—knowing they can put lives on the line… not just their own.”

“I’m a doctor—putting lives on the line without it being the last possible resort is sort of the complete opposite of my thing. Besides… I want you all to take care of Nauja. There’s no way she’s coming anywhere near Dressrosa or Doflamingo’s influence.”

“For someone who really wasn’t thrilled by the idea of her sailing with us, you sure do treat her like she’s your kid,” Shachi noted. His captain didn’t answer, instead avoiding eye contact by staring at a bit of his blanket. “It’s not an insult, you know.”

“I know.”

“Cap, you’ve been a great dad to her—far beyond what any of the rest of us could.”

“I know, Penguin.”

“She’s not your blood, but she is your daughter.” Shachi stood from the edge of the mattress and held Law by the shoulders. “Don’t throw your life away; make sure you come back to your daughter. I will beat your ass if you don’t.”

“You’ve never been able to beat me up.”

“Oh, but I will find a way for this one, trust me.” Penguin nodded behind him in commiseration. “Don’t leave that girl with her uncles and aunt. She will be inconsolable and I don’t know if any of us are equipped for that.”

“…even her aunt?”

“Especially Jean Bart.” When Law did not so much as crack a smile, Shachi exhaled in defeat. “Come on, Cap… work with me here…”

“Make sure she knows,” Law requested, voice wavering. “Even if she’s fostered with Bepo’s cousins, I want her to know.”

“We promise,” Penguin swore. He got off the bed as well, he and Shachi both enveloping Law in an all-around hug-attack. “Fuck… we’re gonna miss you, man.”

“It’s been a great run,” Shachi sniffled. “If you’d asked us fifteen years ago we’d go through these adventures, all the way down to you leaving raising your legacy to us… I’d’ve said you were lying out your ass.”

“How will we know when to leave Zou?” Penguin asked. “Not like you’ll be around to give the signal.”

“Wait for news of what comes out of Dressrosa,” Law replied, thankful that the hug had yet to break. When it did, they’d both see the tears going down his cheeks. “If I don’t kill him, he’ll be pissed enough to come after everyone. Even if he is dead, there might be enough of a lashing out from the remaining officers that it will still make things difficult. Only move when you can guarantee the crew’s safety. You can tell them that’s my final order.”

“This isn’t fair,” Penguin choked out. He kept his face hidden against Law’s shoulder, as did Shachi. “We said we’d follow you to the end.”

“We were lost teenagers…”

“We became brothers that day—don’t fucking give me that,” Penguin hissed. They all eased the hug into more of a hold and it was revealed that all three of them were crying. “Please come back to your brothers… to your daughter… I don’t fucking care how. We won’t fucking care how.”

“You know I can’t promise that,” Law croaked. “We’re only having this conversation because I can’t promise that… just…” He exhaled heavily and bit his lower lip before continuing. “Please let me go into this with a clear conscious. I can’t let anything distract me, or Doflamingo will live.”

“Fine then: once the coast is clear, we’ll break up the crew and take your kid and run off to butt-fuck nowhere,” Shachi said. He didn’t make eye contact—it was too painful. “We’ll use her to pick up women and con people and we’ll raise her to know and to fight and to remember and then she will be the one to slit that fucking creep’s throat…”

“…because she will know everything, and when she does, there will be nothing anyone can do to stop her,” Penguin warned.

Law hesitated for a moment before nodding, his voice cracking as he quietly whispered, “Okay.” He put his hands on the backs of Penguin and Shachi’s necks and brought them close so their foreheads were all touching. “Okay.”

It was not okay, but really, what choice did they have?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

A few nights later, Law stood outside Nauja’s room, staring at the metal door in front of him. In less than an hour he was going to take one of the Polar Tang’s lifeboats to a nearby island which he hoped would be the first stop on his way to eventually finding Doflamingo’s head at his feet. He knew, however, it was very easy for the opposite to happen as well, and the chance that he would never return was too large to ignore.

‘Cora-san,’ he thought, ‘was it this difficult for you when it came to me? You made it seem so effortless.’ He leaned forward, letting his right hand and forehead rest against the cool metal. ‘Vaor, Moetje, how do you get the courage to tell a kid you might not be around to watch them grow up after all?’

Fuck… he wasn’t just scared, he was terrified.

Just then, the door began to give and Law stepped back in surprise, seeing Nauja’s curious face poke out of the room. When she saw it was him, her face lit up.

“I thought it was you, Law-san!” she squeaked happily. “Come in! I want to show you something!” The girl opened the door wider and scurried back into the room, allowing him access to her space. He stepped over the threshold and took in the sight of the repurposed cupboard now fully and truly her bedroom—it was messy, but lived-in, just as his was at her age.

“Nauja-ya, I’m going to close the door,” he said as he went through the motion. “There’s something important I want to discuss.”

“Okay, but first I want you to see these!” She made him sit on the edge of her bunk as she shoved papers in his hands. “I’ve been working hard on them when I’m not studying! Aren’t they neat?!”

Law looked carefully at the drawings now in his hand: they were all of the crew, of her, of him. It was clear she was trying to recreate photographs, the poses making it so it could be nothing but. They were still a child’s drawings, but more of a child much older and with actual training. He got to one of the two of them, napping together on the deck curled against Bepo.

How could he choose dying at the hands of Doflamingo over raising this child? Fuck… they could run, find a place quiet and out of the way, and leave the Tang in the crew’s hands. He could do what Cora-san wanted to do with him: settle down away from fighting, away from war, and bring the child he found himself with to adulthood as he grew older than his own father ever had the chance to be. There was always that option, where he could become an unassuming town doctor in a backwater, nothing-happens island, lies about a dead wife and a respectable career at the ready. He could be the loving, protective father he knew she deserved… live the life that Cora-san always wanted to be for him…

“Law-san? What’s wrong?” His attention was torn from the drawings and he saw that she was staring at him. He touched his face and found bits of wet upon his cheeks; he’d been crying.

Law needed to chose fighting Doflamingo, because if he didn’t, there was no place in the world that would truly keep his daughter safe.

“These are wonderful,” he admitted. He handed the drawings back and wiped his eyes with his sleeve, thankful it was just some errant tears. “I must have just been more surprised than I thought. Did you have any help?”

“Nope!” the girl beamed. “Ikka-ya offered to help with some of the straight lines, but I told her no thank you! I want to get really good at drawing!”

“This is already impressive. I can tell you worked very hard.”

“I need to work harder, though! I want to be one of the best! You need to know how to be very accurate when drawing medical stuff!”

That piqued his interest. “You want to do medical illustrations?”

“Yeah! Well, I still want to be a doctor, like you, but I also want to be able to do drawings! I’m not very good at those yet, but I’m gonna practice real hard!” She pulled another drawing from her desk and showed him; it was a copy of an illustration of a hand’s skeletal structure from one of his textbooks. “See? I’m not good at that yet, but I’m still learning, right?”

“You are,” he agreed, chest filling with pride. “This is wonderful, Nauja-ya. You are very talented.” He watched as she put them away and sat next to him.

“What did you want to talk about?” she wondered. “Are we going to an island where I have to behave extra? I don’t like those islands.”

“No, actually…” He swallowed hard. “I’m going off on my own to do something very important that’s not Warlord stuff… it might be a long time before I return.”

“…why…?” Her voice was quiet as her eyes went wide in confusion as she suddenly realized the situation. “You can’t leave…” Her voice then cracked, which made his heart ache. “You gotta stay here, on the Tang. With everyone. With me.”

“Nauja-ya, I need you to listen to me, alright?” He held her face with both hands, his thumbs stroking her cheeks. “This next part of the journey is too dangerous; I need you to stay with everyone else while I go on my own.”

“That’s not fair,” she sniffled. “I want to help…”

“I know you do, and I need you to remember that I’m not taking anyone else with me. It’s that dangerous.”

“Is it dangerous like going to a Warlord meeting?”

Now was not the time to sugarcoat things. “It’s dangerous because I plan on fighting the bad man that killed Cora-jiisan.”

Nauja thought on that, the gears in the girl’s brain turning methodically. Law watched as she silently came to several different conclusions, with the last one being clearly one of dread.

“Are… are you going to die?”

“Preferably not,” he admitted. She couldn’t know that it was more probable than anything… not yet. “In the meantime, I’m making you temporary vice-captain. It’s going to be your job to help Penguin-ya and Shachi-ya keep these idiots in line, okay?” She nodded silently, which he took for what it was worth. He kissed her on the forehead and took a deep breath, steadying himself before he grinned as wide as he could. “I love you, Nauja-ya.”

“I love you, Law-san.”

“…and the rest of the crew loves you too. Remember that—can you remember that for me?”

“That you love me, and the crew loves me!”

“That’s right. Now I’m going to need you to stay in here, alright? Only Bepo-ya, Penguin-ya, and Shachi-ya know I’m leaving. I don’t want the others to learn about it and they try to stop me.”

“O… okay…” Nauja watched as Law went to the door and went out, pausing just long enough to give her another smile. “Good night. I love you.”

He closed the door, and that was the last she saw of him for a long, long while.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Zunesha.

The entire crew trembled as Bepo brought them to the ancient, massive elephant that he called home. It plodded slowly through the mists and seemed to ignore its visitors, who were all completely dumbstruck that they made it. The peal of a bell, low and sweet, met the Heart Pirates as ropes and cables and chains were lowered down in response to Bepo’s signal.

“They’re having us dry-dock at the gate!” he squealed excitedly. “Come on, everyone! Let’s get the ship secured!”

Before long, the Polar Tang was being lifted into the air, traveling up the leg of a giant fucking elephant, because of course this was where Bepo was from and where Law wanted them to hang out while he took care of things. The only thing keeping them from hiding Nauja below deck and drawing weapons was the navigator’s sheer glee at the situation. They all watched instead as the winch system pulled them up and shifted them over into a docking bay.

“Who might you folks be?” a kindly gorilla asked as they disembarked. By the way the other Minks at the dry-dock seemed to behave, he seemed like the harbormaster of sorts.

“Mark-san, do you remember me?!” Bepo gasped. He ran over to the gorilla and hugged him tightly, which surprised the harbormaster.

“Wait a moment… Bepo, is that you…?” the harbormaster marveled. The bear stepped back and nodded tearfully. “You troublesome cub! You stole my best boat!”

“What… no way…?!” One of the dock hands—a teenaged quokka—went directly up to Bepo and stared. “You’re the kid that stole Dad’s boat and ran away at age eight?!”

“I’m really sorry!” Bepo replied. “All I wanted to do was find my brother!”

“Whoa—you’re a legend!” another teen dock hand—a lemur—gasped. “And now you’re back! Leading a crew of Lesser Minks! That’s great!”

“Well, I… uh…”

Bepo began to panic as he was pulled in towards the forest by the dock hands. The harbormaster looked at the rest of the crew, who all swallowed hard under his stare.

“Garachu,” he nodded. “Tell me: what is the name of the banner you folks fly under?”

“We are the Heart Pirates,” Penguin said nervously. He stepped forward; someone had to do it. “Bepo’s our navigator; we need to speak with whomever’s in charge.”

“Who is your captain?”

“We need to speak with whomever’s in charge,” Penguin repeated. He shivered as the harbormaster and dock hands all froze and stared at him. “We invoke Minkdebt to seek refuge under the protection of Day and Night. If you cannot take us all, then please take your kinsman and the cub.”

“The cub…?” The harbormaster raised his eyebrow as Shachi stepped aside and gently guided a trembling Nauja to stand in front of them.

A cub.

Not only had pirates shown up at the gate with a long-lost Mink countryman, but they arrived with a Human cub and a request for refuge.

“Jason, Kenichiro,” the harbormaster scowled, “get me the Kingsbirds. They’re going to want to know about this.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“Orphans…?”

“Some of them, anyhow,” Monet shrugged. She kept writing in her journal, playing it casual for the Shichibukai in their midst. It had to be the one with actual medical knowledge to plop himself in the middle of their business and get curious enough to ask questions. “Cesar’s experiments involve a new drug that can potentially cure them of the undue gigantification they’ve been experiencing. All of them come from Human stock that doesn’t get much taller than yourself.”

“Then why all the secrecy?”

“You never had to work within bureaucracy, have you?” The harpy put down her pen and turned in her chair. “You know… utilizing your chosen craft instead of your necessary one. Getting the government to sign off on potentially life-saving procedures is like shooting into a crowd with no Haki and having already downed a barrel of alcohol—luck of the draw.”

“Vegapunk’s influence usually supersedes that, doesn’t it?”

“For Vegapunk.” Monet took her glasses off and tried to read Trafalgar—something was radiating off him that made her want to choose her words carefully. “What makes you a sudden bleeding heart? You don’t strike me as the ‘friend to all children’ type.”

“Let’s just say I’m partial to people who haven’t been fucked up yet by the Government—it’s a refreshing change of pace.”

“Even though they’re the age when children learn to keep lies in their hearts the longest?”

“Only if you lie to them.” Law tried to keep his expression even-keeled; to fuck this up now would mean that nothing would be able to get off the ground.  “Do you have experience with such a thing?”

“Lying to children? What adult doesn’t to some extent?” The Warlord shrugged and settled further into the couch, seemingly preparing to take a nap.

“I suppose.”

Monet frowned at the room—Cesar was going to help her keep a close eye on this one.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

‘If I am to agree with you on one thing in twenty years, it should be about this.’

Nekomamushi read the note over again and again, taking glances all the while at the strangers sitting in his presence: twenty humans—nineteen adults, one cub—and a young Mink who had last stepped foot on Zunesha’s back fourteen years prior. They had been kept from the general populace of the Mokomo Dukedom until their fates could be decided, barring even the young Mink’s family from meeting their long-lost son. Now it was up to him; there was little mistaking that bastard Inuarashi’s handwriting, nor the faith he placed in the Kingsbird who handed him the note.

“Let me make sure I have this correct,” the cat said. “You are the crew that has taken care of young Bepo here all this time. Not only that, but your captain is currently on a suicide mission to take out Joker—whom you claim is Warlord and King of Dressrosa Donquixote Doflamingo—which should then send ripples in the underground that shall reach Kaidou and beyond. His last request of you involves attempting to find refuge here, for the child at-minimum, but preferably for the whole lot of you as he takes that man down and potentially draws the ire of dangerous individuals from within Joker’s organization.”

“I know it is asking a lot of people we have never met before in our lives,” Penguin said, “but as you said: we took care of Bepo when he was young. The only thing we truly desire is our kid’s safety and we will invoke the Minkdebt if we have to.” He looked over at Nauja, snuggled up in Ikkaku’s arms with her Sora blanket and Professor Nanuk as she slept due to the late hour. It was the only reason why they were speaking so openly—he didn’t know what she would do if she knew everything as the rest of them did. “We’ll leave her here if the rest of us are unwanted; we’ll manage.”

“Say the Lord of the Day and I agree to refuse your quarter because you are not the captain to whom the Minkdebt belongs?” Nekomamushi purred. “Where shall you go? What shall you do?”

“We’ll still make it our mission to keep the kid safe, but we’ll figure out something else,” Shachi admitted. “It’ll be much more difficult. We might have to do something like find an island in the Calm Belt or hide in the most remote reaches of the Cardinal Blues.”

“You would do this, for a child?”

“We would do this to protect the last thing we have of our captain,” Bepo stated. “The captain took care of me when the only people around were bullies and thieves. You lived with Lesser Minks before as well, milord—weren’t there good ones? Ones who kept you safe, for whom you would do anything to repay your debt to them?” Nekomamushi frowned at that, his thoughts seemingly brought to another time long ago.

“You don’t know the half of it.” The Lord of the Night turned his attention to the sleeping child. “Bring her here.” He waited as Bepo carefully lifted Nauja from Ikkaku’s lap and brought her over to the Mink lord. “What does this child do that makes her so important?”

“She is exactly that,” Penguin said. “Our captain was a dour man, living life with the singular goal of taking down Doflamingo. This child almost made him throw that all away as she turned him into something different… something he never thought he’d be.”

“…a captain…?”

“…a father.”

Nekomamushi nodded, looking at the letter, then Nauja.

“Even fools can come to the occasional correct conclusion,” he said, “and if letting you stay is so simple a decision that Inuarashi can make it, then it’s already done.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Pirates and Marines both gasped in shock as Cesar Clown slumped to the ground and writhed in pain. Law stood over him, barrel of his borrowed pistol still smoking from its spent shot and Room still up. At least he waited for the kids to be on the Marine ship…

“Fuck!” Cesar wailed. He tried to claw at the back of his right shoulder, though it was little use. “You could have killed me!”

“That’s too kind a thing for the likes of you,” Law growled. He then replaced the pistol in its owner’s holster and produced a scalpel from his coat pocket. “Does anyone have a sack I can put this garbage in?”

“Need I remind you that for the plan to work, we need him alive?” Nami frowned. “He’s a scumbag, but shooting him in the back with a seastone bullet so he bleeds out is sort of the last thing we want to do.”

“It will make things easier, at the least,” Law replied coldly. A Marine brought him a large cloth sack and the surgeon began to slice away at the scientist’s body, placing him inside bit by bit. “It’s as easy as picking apart a bug.”

“Congratulations, Luffy: you made an alliance with a psychopath,” she grimaced. Her straw-hatted captain snickered in response.

“Shishishi—he’s just pissed at Clown-guy making the kids hurt so much,” Luffy said, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Seastone means he can’t turn into gas, and the cutting him up and putting him in a sack thing makes it so he can’t try anything else, right?”

“So you do have a functioning brain stem; this might not be hopeless after all.”

“Just don’t get too carried away, okay Torao?”

“Need I remind you all that he literally gave us a hundred beating hearts?” Smoker reminded the Straw Hats. “Your navigator said it best: you made an alliance with a psychopath.”

“If he doesn’t murder us in our sleep, it’ll be a miracle,” Usopp shivered. He then grimaced. “Oh… I wonder what would happen if the bullet wound healed over…”

“He won’t be able to use his Devil Fruit ability until he has it surgically removed,” Law said frankly. “Consider it an additional security measure.”

“Psychopath,” several Straw Hats and Marines sighed in unison. Law didn’t care—he needed to make everything count.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

It was odd being such wanted celebrities, the Heart Pirates found out. It made sense, since they did show up with someone who had been missing since childhood and presumed dead, but the warmth and kindness that the Minks were displaying was something that they had never felt before.

“This place is absolutely fucking wild,” Clione marveled, “and I’m not saying that because they’re Minks.” He and some of the other Heart Pirates were watching Nauja as she played with some of the Mink children, the group being led by Bepo’s father.

“I can’t believe that Cap did this to us,” Uni groused. Clione and Ikkaku stared at him in exasperation. “Okay, yeah, we should have seen it coming, but the fact that he still did it is staring us in the face…”

“Do you think he’ll make it back?” Ikkaku wondered. She caught a wayward ball and tossed it back towards the children.

“Hard to tell,” Uni mused. He watched the children and groaned. “I’m glad I’m not the one in charge of telling Nauja her dad’s headed off to his death. That’s a shit job.”

“No kidding,” Ikkaku grimaced. “I could barely stand to tell her when the Den Den died.”

“I know; if he wasn’t already dying, I’d say we should kill him.” The trio looked to see Shachi and Penguin, holding five longnecks between them. They passed out the beer and sat down with their comrades. “I’m thinking the North Blue.”

“I say the East Blue,” Penguin scoffed. “If we’re gonna hide out, at least make it somewhere warm and quiet.”

“Straw Hat’s from the East,” Uni noted. “Can’t be that quiet.”

“Ever thought of it being here?” Clione asked. He gestured to the playing children with his bottle. “She gets along great with the kids her age, and Bepo’s parents love her as though we just showed up with his brother’s kid.”

“Still too close to Grunkle Mingo,” Shachi scowled. “It’d be a risk taking her, but it’d also be a bigger risk leaving her here. I just…” He took a drink of his beer and sighed. “Ugh—fucking hate this.”

“You know that whatever it is, we have your backs, right?” Ikkaku mentioned. Shachi simply stared at a bit of grass, while Penguin simply took another drink. “Don’t be idiots. We’re in on it too.”

“Yeah,” Clione added. “Can’t get rid of us all that easily.”

“Thanks… that means a lot,” Shachi admitted. The five then continued drinking their beers, watching the children play. At least they weren’t going to have to shoulder it alone.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The route to Dressrosa was a long one, even with an Eternal Pose. Law did not appreciate being dumped into the middle of a bunch of Straw Hat antics, from which there was seemingly no escape. No matter what secluded corner of the ship he found to plan his contingencies, the others seemed to find him, which was beginning to grate on his nerves. He eventually gave up when the Straw Hats decided to have dinner out on the deck, where they turned their meal into a picnic.

“This is indecent,” Cesar’s mouth grumbled soon as it was put together. Law held the part of the man’s head that was the mouth and one of the ears so that Blackleg-ya could approach brandishing a protein shake and a straw.

“Something tells me you’re in no position to complain considering you’re alive right now,” the blond scoffed. He aimed the straw for the mouth and Cesar took it, beginning to drink. “Fuck… this is so creepy and weird.”

“You get used to it,” Law shrugged, “and no, I don’t know how it works anymore than you know how Bone-ya does.”

“Aaaahhhh! It’s going again!” Luffy cackled from the railing. At that, Sanji pulled the shake out of Cesar’s mouth.

“Don’t fucking piss while you’re eating.”

“I’m not the one who decided to attach my dick to the side of the ship.”

“…and let you piss all over yourself in the sack? I don’t think so,” Law frowned. “Let us know when it’s done, Strawhat-ya.”

“It’s done!” Luffy announced. Sanji allowed Cesar to finish the shake and Law cut the captive’s mouth in two again, depositing the pieces in the sack. “What are you going to do when he needs to poop?”

“Luffy, you’re ruining the ladies’ dinner, shut the fuck up,” Sanji hissed.

“Sanji-kun,” Nami sighed, “if we hadn’t built up tolerances to Luffy’s bullshit a long time ago, none of us would even remember how to eat.” She was sitting at the picnic table with Momonosuke in her lap, the boy clinging to her as they ate. “You certainly do enjoy Sanji-kun’s cooking, don’t you, Momo?”

“Most assuredly,” Momonosuke said, nuzzling into Nami’s chest. He grinned perversely when she wasn’t looking, making Sanji, Brook, and Kin’emon seethe in jealously.

“Oooh! Torao! Sit next to me!” Chopper requested as the other doctor made his way to the table. Law did so and glanced at the book open next to the reindeer’s plate.

“You’re a pathologist?”

“Not solely, but I do have an interest in it,” Chopper said. “I want to be able to cure any disease.”

“Even the ones that cannot be cured?”

“There are physical limitations to the body, but any disease should be curable in theory. While some are generally benign, I think it would be good to have cures for those who want them, and to keep the knowledge of other things around in case they pop up again.”

“We met Chopper because Nami was sick with something no one else knew what to do with,” Luffy explained cheerily. “A weird bug bit her and she almost died.”

“That’s probably not something you should be telling people without Nami-ya’s permission,” Law stated. Nami herself shrugged.

“I don’t mind—you’re another doctor.”

“This is true, but not everyone who hears such things would let it go, or use the knowledge for good.”

“Have you come across anything that was difficult to treat, Torao?” Chopper wondered. The man took a bite of fish and nodded. “Oooh! You’ll have to tell me later!”

“Maybe after we’ve dealt with Doflamingo, Tony-ya,” Law said. The reindeer’s face lit up, reminding him of someone who was hopefully far away at that point. “In the meantime, do you have any of your research here on the ship? I’m interested to see what you’re working on.”

“Yes! Definitely! Oh, it’s good to finally have another medical professional on the ship for once! Give me a moment to finish my dinner and I can bring you to the infirmary!”

“I’d like that,” Law stated. The rest of the crew watched carefully as the two doctors interacted, taking note of the admittedly soft way in which the surgeon was interacting with their figurative little brother. He allowed himself to be led from the table soon as they were both finished with their food, vanishing into the infirmary. It was an odd thing, but at least it wasn’t Law brooding in the corner as though he was going to murder them all in their sleep.

When it came time to check on them later, Robin and Nami found Chopper and Law both sleeping slumped over on the desk, having fallen asleep while talking. They put blankets over them and let them be—hauling them into the bunkroom would just do more harm than good.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

“GO AWAY!”

“FINE!”

Nauja glared at the door, trying to visually bore a hole in it so she could see the wee dragon inside. Even though he wasn’t supposed to be that much older than her, she hadn’t liked this Momonosuke from the moment they met. He was bratty and didn’t want to come out of his room, which made things difficult. She finally had another Human kid to play with and he was just a pain in the ass. Ugh—it made her want to scream!

Storming away from the small hut, Nauja tried to find something else to do. She tried the crew, only to find that they were mostly busy helping the Minkfolk and otherwise not around. Bepo-ya’s young cousins were busy studying, as were the other Mink children, and even though they were nice enough to invite her, she didn’t really feel up to it. Then there was the newly-arrived Straw Hat crew, which was helping alongside the Hearts and making themselves useful. Even though it was only half the crew, they were very nice, and always did their best; no wonder they said that Law-san had allied with them. The only bad part was that they had been the ones to bring Momonosuke to Zou, all while Law-san had stayed back in order to fight some Flamingo guy… that’s what they said, anyhow.

This was boring. They had already been there on Zou for so long that it was beginning to grate on her nerves. The slow sway of Zunesha’s gait was a poor substitute for the rocking of the sea and the soft skin of his back very much unlike the reassuring solidity of the metal that made up the Polar Tang. She had already explored plenty, so what else was there to do?

“Nauja-chan! Can you come over here, please?” She looked over her shoulder to see the Straw Hat cook waving at her from the window of the community mess hall. “I have a job for you!”

“Uh… okay.” She went into the kitchen and was immediately placed on a stool and given a basket of green bean pods with instruction to snap the ends off.

“I was doing a lot more complicated shit at your age in the kitchen, so I think you can more than handle it,” he chuckled kindly. “Let me know when you’re done with that and I can give you some more prepwork to keep you busy.”

“What if I don’t want to?” she posed.

“I’ll tattle on you to Bepo and the goons,” he threatened teasingly, voice remaining gentle. “If it were up to me, you wouldn’t need to do this, but they don’t want to get back on your ship and be rusty at chores.”

“They’re not my dads.”

“Yeah, but they’re the ones with authority over you and they said I should draft you as kitchen help because you already do it on your ship. Now don’t lose the ends of those—I’m going to use them in a soup.”

Nauja pouted for a moment before she began to indeed snap the ends off the bean pods. She grumbled sourly as she did so—there were other things she could have been doing at that moment… the only problem was that she was stolen before she could figure out what.

Wait a moment… it had been a long time since they had come to Zou, wasn’t it? She tried to think while she cleaned the beans—how long had they been there? It was surely no more than a few weeks… or was it…?

She didn’t know how long it had been since she last saw Law-san.

A chill ran down Nauja’s body—she didn’t know when she last saw Law-san. Well, she knew that they last saw one another on the Tang, but how long ago was that now? Suddenly, lots of things began to feel like they made sense. There was a reason why they went to Zou without the captain, why the Minks looked at her while talking in their language, why Penguin-ya and Shachi-ya kept staring at her with sad, sad eyes.

Law-san wasn’t coming back. All the Hearts were so sad because Law-san wasn’t coming back, and without him, they were going to leave her here.

She was going to be alone again.

“Nauja-chan, what’s this?” Sanji-ya crooned. He took the beans away from her and knelt down in front of her to be at eye level. “Young ladies shouldn’t cry, not unless they’re calling for help.”

“I want Law-san,” she sniffled. “I need Law-san.”

“Trafalgar is coming back, don’t worry,” he assured her. It was weird, but Nauja noticed that Sanji-ya was the only one of the Straw Hats who could easily pronounce Law-san’s family name, said with the same ease as someone who had been saying such names their whole life. “Why would he leave an adorable angel like you if he wasn’t planning on coming back?”

“He didn’t know if he was going to survive going against the bad man!” Nauja cried. “Law-san said that the bad man killed Cora-jiisan a long time ago, and that he’s super-dangerous! I’m scared!”

Sanji-ya held her gently by the shoulders, trying to look in her eyes. “Nauja-chan, everything is going to be fine…”

“It’s not! He’s going to die!” Her tears were now fully sobs, shuddering and ugly. “I’m never going to see Law-san again! He said I was allowed to need him! How can he say that and then leave?! It’s not fair!”

“There, there,” Sanji-ya shushed. He brought her close and hugged her, letting the child sob into his shirt. “I know you miss him, but you’re going to have to trust him, okay? He wants you to trust him.”

“How do you know what he wants?!”

“Something gives me a sneaking suspicion, is all.” He sat down on the stool and held her protectively in his lap, stroking her hair and rocking her gently, all while he hummed a song that sat low and rumbling in his chest. She recognized the song after a few bars, letting out a startled gasp.

“How do you know that song?!” she demanded. “Law-san sings me that all the time!”

“Trafalgar? Sing? I’d pay to see that.” Sanji-ya laughed and shook his head. “I’m from the North Blue like he is—my mother sang that to me when I felt sad. I don’t remember the lyrics anymore, but I do know the melody.”

“You don’t need to do this!” Nauja snapped. She wriggled out of his grasp and drew her dirk, pointing it at the chef. “Stop lying to me! I’ll just figure out how to kill the man who killed Law-san! I don’t need a lullaby to feel better!”

“Nauja-chan, relax,” Sanji-ya assured her. He placed his left hand on both of hers and lowered the dirk. “I was a scared little kid at eight years old too. You can count me as on your side.”

“Yeah, right; you’re just lying to me.”

“The liar on my crew is not currently on Zou, my dear Nauja-chan, and I hope you take care to remember that.” He stood and smoothed out his pant legs before gesturing to the beans. “Maybe you just need to get lost in your work.”

“Uh-huh, sure.” She sheathed her dirk and sat down hard on the stool, folding her arms across her chest. “Weirdo.”

“I am not weird; you are just scared, and that’s making you irritable and irrational and not yourself,” Sanji-ya frowned. “Snap some beans and you might be able to calm down.”

“You’re the one who looks like a comic book villain,” Nauja grumbled. She watched as something flickered across the blond man’s face, only for it to get smothered by a mask.

“A comic book villain? That’s a new one.”

“If you’re from the North, then you know about Sora too. Your eyebrows curl like the bad guys’ or haven’t you noticed?”

“It runs in my family,” Sanji-ya said firmly, tone changed just enough to sound… Nauja didn’t know. How did he sound? “Now clean the beans.”

“Uh… yes, sir,” she squeaked. Nauja slowly went back to cleaning the beans, unsure why there had been a sudden shift in Sanji-ya. She didn’t like it, but it made her wonder if there was a family with Germa 66’s curly eyebrows, was there an entire island like that? Was it a dominant gene? She wondered her way through the beans as well as some potatoes, with the tension in the air dissipating by the time she was sent out to ring the dinner bell.

She did not forget, however. What exactly was going on…?

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Later on that night, as everyone was getting ready for bed, Nauja cornered Penguin and Shachi, threatening to run away like Bepo and the Lords of Day and Night did at her age if they didn’t tell her why Law was taking so long. Neither man answered her question, though Penguin scooped her up into his arms and carried her back to her bed.

“We’re staying here until we hear news out of Dressrosa,” he explained quietly as he tucked her in. “We’ll figure out what to do from there, okay?”

She nodded, fear confirmed, and waited until Penguin left the room to cry herself to sleep.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Arm throbbing, Law was wide awake as he lay in the small Dressrosan house. Snores filled the air from the remainder of his allies that were packed in there, everyone resting after the harrowing day. It was a comfort to know that Doflamingo was now dethroned and awaiting a prison transport to Impel Down. Everything he had ever done—all his varying enterprises and empires—now lay shattered; he would be a disgraced man for the rest of his days, rotting in Impel Down until he was nothing more than a pile of bones wearing tacky sunglasses.

Then why couldn’t Law find sleep?

Carefully, Law got up and used Kikoku as a crutch in order to hobble outside. He sat down on a bench and looked up at the stars—there were less of them thanks to the moon and the lights from the city, but they were there all the same. Once he was comfortable, he used his Devil Fruit ability to open a cavity in his chest and pulled out a photo. It was of Nauja, smiling brightly as she sat on his shoulders with Professor Nanuk. As he stared at the photo, his shoulders began to feel lighter and his limbs not quite as stiff and sore.

“Your family?”

Law looked over and saw Kyros closing the door behind him. He leaned on an actual cane, still not used to the prosthetic that the Straw Hat shipwright built for him, hobbling over to the bench to join the younger man.

“Something like that.”

“I could tell you were fighting for family,” Kyros said. A pause settled over them, during which Law never took his eyes off the photo. “May I see?”

Wordlessly, Law passed over the photo, watching a knowing smile settle comfortably on Kyros’s face. “Her name is Nauja.”

“The love of a daughter is something one must never take for granted,” the older man said. “You fought for the memory of a father, and that is worth much, but fighting for a child’s future is one of the most noble things one could do.”

“Having her around has taught me a lot,” Law nodded. He accepted back the photo and placed it in his chest once again. “I just want to see her.”

“Why do you think I kept sneaking into the Corrodia Coliseum?” Kyros looked at him and clapped a hand on Law’s shoulder. “It’s difficult and hurts, but it’s also one of the easiest and best things in the world. Both heart-wrenching and rewarding.”

“What is?”

“A father’s love for his daughter… what else?” Kyros chuckled to himself, remembering something from long ago. “How old is she?”

“She’ll be eight later this year—I’ve had her since she was six.”

“Did her mother have her before that?”

“She is as much my blood as you are; my navigator found her and she became my responsibility.”

“Then she is even luckier than I thought.” Kyros rubbed the joint of his new leg; phantom limb sure was being a bitch. “Did Doflamingo know?”

“Not to my knowledge,” Law replied. “None of the Straw Hats know—I acquired her after we last met prior to this.”

“Then she will not be my secret to tell.”

“Thank you.”

The two fathers sat there and quietly exchanged stories until the sky began to pale on the horizon. It was something they knew the others wouldn’t understand, even if they empathized with them.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

The journey to Zou felt to Law as though it took ages. Honestly, it felt longer than the route from Punk Hazard to Dressrosa, if one was to press Law. He could not rest properly, let alone enjoy his drinks, and it was difficult to not let it show to the others on the… ugh… Going Luffy-senpai. Every so often he caught a nearly knowing look from Nico Robin, despite the fact it seemed as though everyone else bought his act. Of all the times he regretted the stoic, aloof, loner routine, it was then. All he wanted to do was make sure that Nauja and the others were alright, but without so much as a transponder snail, the only thing he could do was wait.

For all it was worth, Law knew that there was nothing that could have prepared him for the sight of the giant elephant Zunesha. Bepo had warned him, of course, but it was still beyond what he could have imagined. There was something incredibly off about the entire thing as they went up the elephant’s leg… something that he couldn’t quite place… and it made his stomach twist in nerves.

As it turned out, something had been wrong: Zou had recently been under attack. Kaido’s men had tortured the Mink Tribe in order to get them to turn over the pirates they had been harboring. Not a single Mink budged, and they were able to present their guests safe, sound, and—most importantly—alive. The Heart Pirates all ran up to their captain, not a dry eye amongst them.

“You fucking bastard, scaring us like that,” Shachi cried, clinging to Law.

“Yeah,” Penguin added tearfully as he joined in the hug. “You’re never allowed to do that again, asshole.”

“Okay, fair,” Law replied. His crew all took turns hugging him and thanked whatever would listen that he was alive. Their captain came back to them alive. Everyone was there except for one… which he noticed immediately.

“Where’s Nauja?”

“We made her hide since we didn’t know what was going on,” Bepo explained. “I’ll get her!” He then ran off happily.

“Wait a second… who’s Nauja and why would she have to hide?” Usopp wondered. “I thought your crew was full of people who could at least take care of themselves.”

“Not this one,” Law replied. He waited until Bepo popped back out from behind some rubble to be hopeful, breaking into a near-jog when he saw a sobbing Nauja running towards him. She leapt into his arms as they met and he hugged her tightly, falling to his knees.

“You made it,” she croaked.

“I did.” He held her close as she cried into his shoulder, the little girl shaking from all the emotions washing over them both.

“Oh… I didn’t know you had a kid!”

Oh, fuck… that was right… there were other people there aside from the crew. Law turned and saw Luffy standing there and smiling like a ray of sunshine. Nauja looked at him tenuously.

“Hi there!” He waited for the girl to respond, to which she just stared. “I’m Monkey D. Luffy, and I’m gonna be King of the Pirates! Your dad and I are in an alliance! That makes us friends!”

“Strawhat-ya, I…”

“My dad’s gonna be King of the Pirates!” Nauja insisted. Law and the other Hearts—and even the other Straw Hats—froze. “Dad’s the greatest pirate ever!”

“I dunno about the greatest,” Luffy mused, “but he is pretty cool. He’s our friend too. We’re going to have a party—would you like to join?” Nauja looked up at Law and he gave her one of his few true smiles over the past few months.

“No one throws a party like Strawhat-ya,” he assured her.

“Shishishi! This is great! More friends!” Luffy went back to jabbering on at Sanji about all the neat things he wanted the other man to cook.

“I was wondering how all the kids on Punk Hazard loved you, then I met her,” Nami chuckled. She watched as Law’s face grew dark from blush—he was caught. “She’s done her best to be a good playmate for Momo while we’ve been here.”

“Have you been playing good with Momo-ya?” Law asked. Nauja grunted into his shoulder.

“I can’t because he’s dumb and refuses to play,” she claimed, clinging to him as he stood. “Momo-ya is a dumb boy sometimes. Why won’t he come out of his room?”

“I’m sure he just wanted to see his dad again, just like you did, little miss,” Franky said. She peeked at him before hiding her face again. “Oh, are we being super-shy this week?”

“No; she’s just normal and knows you’re weird as hell,” Nami deadpanned. “Come on Nauja-chan—we can go see what Sanji-kun has cooking…” She went to go take her from Law, only for the girl to squeak and cling tighter.

“I think I’ll handle this, Nami-ya,” Law replied. The Straw Hats noticed a softness to his voice that was not normally there, one they could tell existed for one person. “Let us know when Blackleg-ya has food ready, if you please.”

“Right… yes…” The Straw Hats allowed Law to wander off towards the cluster of his crew, still holding Nauja aloft. They continued to welcome him, hug him, cry over the fact he was there in front of them again, fully knowing the fact he was even alive was a miracle.

It was Nika, one of them said. The mercurial, ancient god that was on the lips of rural grandmothers and in faerie stories from before the Void Century; only he could have pulled off something as monstrously difficult as bringing their captain back to them while Doflamingo still lived. There was no one else that could have tampered to make it so the Captain’s haphazard alliance choices made things better than expected. Law lived, Doflamingo was being locked away for the rest of his miserable days, and the crew was finally whole again.

Was it mentioned that the captain was still alive? Because he was. Despite all odds.

Eventually, Sanji called that dinner was ready and everyone began to flock to the community mess hall. With Nauja still refusing to let go, Law continued to carry her, the child clinging to him like a limpet. The blond chef noticed as he passed the man two plates and got his attention, motioning with his head to use the back exit. Law did, slipping out unnoticed by the others as he found a quiet spot to sit, away from all the commotion.

“Come on,” he urged. “You have to eat something. I’d hope by now you have learned that Blackleg-ya doesn’t tolerate food waste.”

Slowly, Nauja detached herself from Law and accepted the plate, eating next to him. Neither said anything for a few minutes, the pair letting quiet settle around them. They were nearly halfway done with their food before the girl began to sniffle and lean into her father’s arm.

“Hey,” Law said. He put his plate down and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I’m back.”

“You almost weren’t.”

He paused at that, giving the statement the severity it deserved. “You’re right. I almost died. A few times, in fact.”

Silence.

“Cora-jiisan’s killer is in prison; Justice has finally been carried out,” he continued. “We will be able to live free of him. We can be a family and I won’t have to fear for your safety.”

“I… I thought the crew is our family.”

“Not… not the way I’m talking about.” He swallowed hard as she looked up at him, her eyes large and wet with tears. “I want to refer to you as my daughter… my kiend… my famke…”

“…but… I don’t look like you…”

“Not looking the same didn’t stop Cora-san from taking me in, nor did it stop you from telling Strawhat-ya I was your dad earlier.” He smoothed her hair and scratched at her scalp, his heart breaking at the way she was trembling. “I think we’ve been dancing around the subject for a long time, haven’t we?”

“But what if you had died?!” Nauja snapped. She pushed Law’s hand away and stood, facing him as she cried. “Penguin-ya and Shachi-ya said they were going to look after me! They’re not my dads!”

“Nauja…”

“You almost left me with them and died! Penguin-ya and Shachi-ya are nice, but they can’t replace you!”

“…Nauja…”

“You went to die and I didn’t have the chance to call you ‘Dad’ or ask you more about Flevance or medical stuff or show you any more drawings or show you that I can fight with a sword…!”

He blinked. “You can fight with a sword?”

“No, but I will! And you almost missed that! I was scared I’d be alone again!”

“Nauja, I had your caregivers in place… I made sure you would be taken care of…”

“I love my uncles, but they’re not my dad!” she wailed. “You’re not like my other dad was! You answer my questions and let me stay with you when I have a bad dream and teach me about medical stuff and science and let me sit with you and train with you and…! And…!” She was crying too heavily to speak, instead her sobs drowning her words before they could be said. He pulled her close and rubbed circles on her back as he tried to gently shush her.

“Maybe how I handled it wasn’t fully fair, but now that risk is gone, Trafalgar Nauja, and I no longer have to fear my adoptive uncle using you as bait.”

Nauja sucked in a breath. His uncle…?

“Cora-jiisan’s older brother and his killer are the same man,” Law continued. “I planned on fighting him to the death, because if I didn’t, then I could never truly rest. I was not free.”

“What…” Nauja breathed in deep to suck some snot back into her nose. “What was the price?”

“Hmm…?” He looked at her face and saw her brow was knit in concentration.

“You said that freedom has a price. What was it?”

He had told her that, hadn’t he? It felt like so long ago now.

“Whatever price I paid,” he said, “it was almost the wrong one.” Law held Nauja’s face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs. “I’m glad I didn’t.”

“I’m glad too.” She then chewed her lower lip in thought. “Uh… Law-san…?”

“Yeah?”

“What did you call your dad? In Flevench?”

A smile crept across his lips. “Vader or Vaor; there were more in our language, but those were the main two. There… there are other ways, you know.”

“I don’t want other ways.” She hugged him around the middle, hiding her face in his shirt. “I’m so glad you came back, Vaor.”

“I am too, famke; I am too.”

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

As it turned out, Kin’emon was not Momonosuke’s father. Nor, in fact, was Momonosuke an ordinary little boy. He was, in fact, Heir to the Shogunate of Wano, with Kin’emon, Kanjuro, and Raizo as his retainers. It was their goal to take down the false Wanolese ruler and the Pirate Emperor associated with him, freeing the land from over two decades of strife. The Straw Hat and Heart Pirates listened as the tale was told, the alliance tenuous until they learned of who the Emperor in question was:

They were going to finish the job from Dressrosa and take down Kaidou.

There was just one small problem: as the alliance was being formed in the Whale Tree, Big Mom’s envoys had a different sort of plan in mind.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-

With the Sanji Retrieval Team already on the way, the remaining members of the Alliance were readying to leave as well. It was difficult, however, as the littlest Heart Pirate was adamant about her position.

“I want to go too!” Nauja insisted, stomping her foot on the ground of the dry-dock. Law stood there with his arms folded across his chest, unperturbed, while everyone else was loading up the Polar Tang with supplies.

“You are staying with Alana-ya and Yepo-ya,” he insisted. Bepo’s parents were standing not that far away, having attempted to chase after her. “It’s dangerous.”

“I don’t care! You almost died before! I’m not letting you go again!”

“We could very well all die and then what would happen?” Law posed. “You’re staying here, where it is safe.”

“I’m going with you!”

“You are not!”

“Yes I am!”

“Sweetie, your father wants you to stay here,” Alana said gently. She tried to coax the child back, only for Nauja to push away.

“I don’t belong here! I belong with my dad!” the girl insisted. She saw heartbreak on Bepo’s parents’ faces and instantly felt terrible. “You’re all really nice to me, and I want to visit, but I have to go with my dad!”

“The only place you have to go is back to town, famke.”

“I just got you back! I need you, Vaor!” Nauja then burst into tears—real, genuine tears—and clung to Law’s leg, refusing to let go in an attempt to anchor him in place.

“Maybe, this time the child might be right on this,” Yepo suggested. He looked at Law, who was at a rare loss for words. “I’ve already had one child run away from my house in the dead of night; I don’t want this one to do the same.”

Fuck—he was right, wasn’t he? It was either take her along now, or have her chase after them later. A child on her own in the New World, or at his side where he could take and shamble her away from danger… he guessed there was only one option he realistically had left.

[phoenixgreen]

German lore for u guys

1. probably the Baltic Sea. I lived on a boat there for a while and I still visit every year. It’s just beautiful

2. at Home! Definitely

3. yes, only on the north coast but we a have two different seas there. the Baltic Sea and the north sea

4. I don’t love most german food but even I aren’t immune to a Schnitzel

5. Alles ist Neu by Peter Fox. Absolute banger. Legendary status (or Major Tom, close second)

6. Oof, many. Probably 99 Luftballons just because it’s way to popular and because I don’t like the singer 🤷‍♂️

7. Wahnsinn (Madness), Lurch (a kind of lizard), Sterne (Stars)

8. well, yeah. Germans mostly look like every other white people group on earth so 🤷‍♂️ with all of em I suppose

9. I would love to check out the Netherlands and Denmark more, even tho I visited before. I am probably most familiar with Switzerland, Austria, Poland and France

10. Hurensohn :) (very basic but very good, translates to son of a whore)

11. I Love Frank Schätzing. He writes mostly extremely realistic sci fi novels and is just amazing in his research (he wrote “The swarm”, it’s crazy good and scars, you will never see the ocean with the same eyes again)

12. haven’t seen many but most of them are fine I think. I have a personal beef with the translation of Major Tom tho. But that’s mostly because it feels like they tried to steal this song from us and pretend it was always English lol

13. My family isn’t big into traditions or superstitions but I guess our humor might seem strange to outsiders. German humor in general is probably not for everyone. It’s a pretty British with much sarcasm and stuff. I eat it up tho

14. No. Only good thing we ever produced was Dark and that’s it (ok that’s a bit exaggerated but I really don’t wanna talk about our television stuff. I vastly prefer German YouTube, they are mostly fantastic)

15. Bruder muss los (“Brother I have to go”, I honestly don’t know how to explain this meme or how it’s used. It’s really just if you get it you get it lmao)

16. I hate that most people seem to think all of Germany is essentially Bavaria (beer, dirndles, yodeling etc.). It is true tho, that we love our bread. I Love bread. Bread is amazing

17. While I don’t think any country in the world could have a boring history, I think Germany is a special case. It is practically impossible not to be at least a little interested in our history as a German. So yeah, I am. Not just interested in the Nazi part tho. Our history with the Roman’s is crazy

18. Maybe a tiny one? I was often told my English sounded more like someone from Britain or Australia so not that much I think.

19. I am indifferent to flag and song

20. Soccer. By far. No competition in sight. (If Germany ever fell into civil war it would be oder soccer teams)

21. Definitely some of our amazing bread. And maybe a piece of the Berlin Wall

22. I probably don’t need to tell you what every German is ashamed about (or at least the vast majority of germans, not the other kind…). I am proud however of everything that came after (not everything everything, I mean the uniting part) and I really really think german people for the most part have a very unique way of seeing our place in the world and how to handle national pride. It’s a VERY harsh contrast to the USA. If we ever were to be forced to pledge ourselves to the nation in school we would think the old times were back like wtf why are u guys doing that 😭

23. Beer

24. France (we don’t like the French, no European country likes the French lmao)

25. Actually no. I am pretty comfortable and even tho I have my fair share of problems (especially regarding politics and growing right radicalization) I am really happy living here

26. Well. Most of the time we are Nazis in Hollywood xD I don’t know if I should count that as I don’t like the portrayal or not. I mean, I don’t like nazis either so good for every movie who gets that right. I have the feeling tho, that we don’t exist much outside of that tho. It’s either - no germans in the movie or - germans in the movie and they are nazis (or the movie hast something to do with one of the world wars)

27. Otto. One of the most iconic comedians. Not all of his humor aged super well (he is pretty old at this point) but he was my childhood idol. (And if we count internet personality’s, probably “coldmirror” she made the most iconic Harry Potter parody synchros ever and is just in general the reason why my humor is the way it is now)

28. Yeah, we have a lot a lot. My fav lake is just the lake in my hometown. Could walk 5 minutes down to the little beach. Wonderful place

29. Oh yeah xD I live in Brandenburg - the state surrounding Berlin. And we hate each others guts. Berlin thinks Brandenburg is nothing but forest and old timy farmer culture while Brandenburg thinks Berlin is arrogant and wierd (Berlin is the New York City of Germany.) Oh and everyone hates Bavaria and Bavaria hates everyone else 👍

30. Nope. I would love to but I was born into a pretty standard German family. My grandmothers side of the family grew up in Poland but in a time where parts of it still belonged to Germany so they weren’t technically polish.

“hi, I’m not from the US” ask set

given how Americanised this site is, it’s important to celebrate all our countries and nationalities - with all their quirks and vices and ridiculousness, and all that might seem strange to outsiders.

1. favourite place in your country?

2. do you prefer spending your holidays in your country or travel abroad?

3. does your country have access to sea?

4. favourite dish specific for your country?

5. favourite song in your native language?

6. most hated song in your native language?

7. three words from your native language that you like the most?

8. do you get confused with other nationalities? if so, which ones and by whom?

9. which of your neighbouring countries would you like to visit most/know best?

10. most enjoyable swear word in your native language?

11. favourite native writer/poet?

12. what do you think about English translations of your favourite native prose/poem?

13. does your country (or family) have any specific superstitions or traditions that might seem strange to outsiders?

14. do you enjoy your country’s cinema and/or TV?

15. a saying, joke, or hermetic meme that only people from your country will get?

16. which stereotype about your country you hate the most and which one you somewhat agree with?

17. are you interested in your country’s history?

18. do you speak with a dialect of your native language?

19. do you like your country’s flag and/or emblem? what about the national anthem?

20. which sport is The Sport in your country?

21. if you could send two things from your country into space, what would they be?

22. what makes you proud about your country? what makes you ashamed?

23. which alcoholic beverage is the favoured one in your country?

24. what other nation is joked about most often in your country?

25. would you like to come from another place, be born in another country?

26. does your nationality get portrayed in Hollywood/American media? what do you think about the portrayal?

27. favourite national celebrity?

28. does your country have a lot of lakes, mountains, rivers? do you have favourites?

29. does your region/city have a beef with another place in your country?

30. do you have people of different nationalities in your family?

[libidomechanica]

In headaches of motion at dawn

A curtal sonnet sequence

               1

If you are! Who counts hours, they rose through you thief, who do swerue, rebels to bed you the traditional South. I’d like Hebe’s in hue, bewitching twa laugh’d and drain’d. In headaches of motion at dawn. The burrow or nest, and draw and brought of Thyself down? Would the bitter, bitter, deathful-grinning fear I would I deny thee? Not be matched him alone, I thinking death’—alas! And a temper; mild, to sea in a penalty kick.

               2

But yet when he no more in a dream, from mere upbraiding griefs infold: but lo! Steal from Thames his pegs; but the lips, as he used to it; and doth lie so in my back into my soul, let him up, to do their charging all the Fantom of war would bar,—now tread, as if after light to his bed. Asks ease, and the nightgown in was bright and plenteous spring opens a theme fortress foiled, while thilke same vnhappye Ewe, who heaven, my spouse Nancy.

               3

Will say no. If her aims of a skulls in your adventurous pain, poor lover but yet those passions as the file to procreate with cold,—but very means of others shooting now. My selfe will not cry also althought for, baith kings wherein your living in jest; and Wonder moonless night and death. Thanks, for the lake, and the yell of ghost or not able to play in, the tell your cupped handsome gentle Lawiers, wage, like my despise.

               4

As bear it will be wandering with Thy Essential! My funny toil our bridal, young Lochinvar. May to consumed, mark if he could, till War’s loud war by land the rest but still I saw it filled up, and when heard a love of year when the service and near him outdo. This side doth in every line we have melts the time, dying in the croupe the care-burden grown, it made him with Thy Essential South. That the end of life leaks away.

               5

And nothing issues from man, the lonely by far, the corner your elbow as I to take this part of the bonie lad that speculation to the wind shine, and he three hot Junes burning peeps do Greece or war? Star Chamber ward i’ll take or leaving a good god make weep the land! Her when I saw you will be wandering night we first—they stranger, you to sell lovers are descend, with grave—wrapt in a room of a kindly season knows?

               6

’Tis all corroding so fayre a more affection, where Justice naked of endurance; cheerful, but empty. And gazes from God in those that has two or three summer weeping close they both in both are sold to their kind. Haste, hasten down by the ringing by Dame Partlett reared and pray may grac’d: a friend, because there made up a love all effects contrary unto its Intelligences, of your brow and as you for you with me!

               7

A poison-cup, he drank the tenth Musike speak with that unchaste? He took her settlement of the moon held up to our court, and what she inflame Majnún, and calling; recall, with no more rich a star into my flocke and flowers. While I weep! A Chapel were off—of course was it Absál? See now must bear witnesse called on the weary world should disappoint they sail’d? Ich habbe yhent, and that increasing powre dicerne. Rule, wound, and I.

               8

It self resemblance just as a moment that shall love you mayst with me though in virgins, time-past, known sorrow and all in all that summer’s storm-trouble deaf heaven’s gate. You have chose his sleep as it went to pay with you, sleeping. A path has lost breath and when on Marlborough soon she did lack See, at another did feele: for the rest to the green boat, the bridegroom meets the midst, where such loyal people beat with puffing kissed her.

               9

—We held me warm the spirit meet, and rave at then everybody yet so quite? Unable too, yet when thy sweet dew place, disdain intent of such loyalties’ expression! No time, and beautie thunders! It is engender’d and dramatic this island. Sits in bushes up in the worth, to do thought to Arm Bears! Back to thy mamie, shall gie thee how to make the Baltic deep, and the hollow behind. All we thing in their father’s fate!

               10

With beautie beauty still a Higher Power received; so your fruit and gone, I only wedding came, it is my breast. Word there never had sunk a flocculent dead, ere men of mine, smooth-faced darling the night the banner of which best free discussion upon the world equal divide them, a Kate, a Francis call I left his form, as, thou rove, by conquer all your throat and where Cupid trembling pride of rings friends joy, foes grieve not room fair.

               11

She, that only Knows. Began to sleep, protected all in love thy Lovers forget such a race, wha can praise is due, onely at your face but lo! By you ran and all into pure and I call Cupids dart an image o’ my heart the top-gallant came to my Darkness rushing ballads o’er, the croupe the bridegroom wished her babe forget these repose, a heart the tattoo: I want to show his soul with briars, my joys did shin’st, and hair.

               12

What beautiful pea green-sickness rushing underhand, stand to proue, by all that Memory love, and face, the bed lay a mute remembered lay a mute remembers after your lover but you from fame’s blackened their owne smart. My last gasps, as he used to its ray? If thou dost in thee, or true- love they guessed the bells upon the worst: never linked with a silence: so that sell forth, compare, with loves unbought, or writing, and brooding.

               13

Was no excels, in leave the tide. But not again. Mine eye love. That would be jealousy, their way. Me a little while thou be where lifts the moon held me warm, let go! So your love I did allowed in her lusting for stone, since breast, of white line and I call night keep your arms, wi’ as gude will we thing a battle here in our bridal, younger years of whom they hae disown’d within, and seas of sheaves with despaire take for the rushing me.

               14

Look off his Desert my soul, let him down. I’m trying to a final end, and lift my love. Gaze, naked of my hand the Blood and fly in the hill, and it posterity. Would trust, between they set them while, that summer dearest bands untwining? By reason her eyes over single cord, but if there we thy dear, needing two? I will say no. Hers crowd, for a flightly held a silver branches from the same skin for one solemnities!

               15

It is she talks o’ rank and flower and the roar of a land why, I have plague, that Pity as fair; in grace is store: the whole lived, they have change and braw, when I behold another’s face: inches from sullen believe me, my chaste? But not marriage-bed, be you all enforced to Mars as moisture life— O father dividends of fire. And Thou; if I—this Dignity and other’s hand. And dusty as farre excels, in leaves the question.

               16

With my body lies beside him with cold, and oh, young beam of heaven, with me as with silken tent at midday whether womankind, it’s no thou strike, if her arms for your shadows till, and from her eyes’ expense, nought of Thyself again but Thee, yea, in the world against or faithful, indeed, Mamma, I did allowed to make more helpless! The voice for the powerless on her pat me from their proud company, with thou art no less.

               17

Be and led by mewere you for blisse brings to keepe good queen. Have sung this abject to interline its true beauty no pencil, beauty from no Womb of Maud; I play’d within an hour I am fled from which make Love of year when passionate heart of the snow covered like the peace, is over the could make a chart my legs. To make Lover are not to iudgements with a runcible spoon; and lost hath the eyes that makes me best bed.

               18

It is engender’d Kurd of garland, I am a giant liar; and heart is loose our own mouths at charm—she talks o’ rank and bolts of advance, the old house. How blew in like a greater name of youth, when the same himself from everyday to life’s tongue, that far from the figure and I. Not so; not cut him between you collide violently with friend; and yet those old hysteries molder, distinctions meet a lassie every hair.

               19

Well seru’d that of all Creator, when the center of fear. That white fish on thy Harím Dividuality no Entrance finds no praise, awhile those airy silks to floods, what a holiday, where the lamplights before than I shall such high comforts have plague, that I deem’d no pace perceive you, you fearfully fed, luxurious love, a spring as well knows? To makes me sent, etc. Not this flowers, euen vnto Stella beare!

               20

Every things indigest such a race, the watered sparrows’ fray I loved, as love so easily because it winter with and stouping Phebus steed was spent. Before going down and hustled to me: for decades, torchlight, from fame’s blisse? Mortal Love. He not silent the stronger stood and Sense—through a loyal people cotter’s fate!—I might has been but play us; company, with ingratitude I find the rosy temple on.

               21

Paths, embellish’d more happy as we court and sweetness had none near. As nothing on a bride’s fate! We firstly, those world, but dare a new light; those lecture stirs a quietst iudgments have a firm post-obit on another wisht thee, and years of whom alone beweep my outcast state has been different on Travel, other could plunge there, as pale mould bend or ceased then takes the dreary phantom of the shuddering leaves littering punishment.

               22

And were off—of course was my passionate heart in marble of brave, butchered in my love to thy head as any nail in town. One of useless as with the feet, some better mind; it isn’t even shapes the beloved a pretty maid, your magnolia ignite the mirrored in you looked neighbour with repentance his tender within a day, in a nights before it but one, Her Grace to be and there was mostly strangled in her eye.

               23

And Sleep, the delight; my life, that Salámán, and the exampled pair, and sacred fires of quince, was from Greenwich Village cars for pity! Some say loud is our Universary, a dove, seen identity, where dewdrops pearl the wind come should like a duckling bee, sorrow and a morowe, and see God only the road. Shapely—just a living drifts their parent’s head, and keep, which was deemed a bore. Till of my mother, to untie!

               24

I do not silent lightning under what thou art out of the Essential Soul, althoughtful green-sickness and endeth! For thine own sweet, which now might, his noblest the mind most alone. Gender not the head? For semlokest of a’. The arms have I see the world is full oft he perished? I turned a lion’s breast almighty ever-present mixed with her sweet your magnolia ignite the flying gold and will unclosed with a smiles?

               25

Sad usage of joy. Deceived; so your shrine, twere bettering spark struck vainly in the sweet a fleet came; he great minds outrun their graves, these lips? A dim basement of entry. No, there she lo’ed her. The higher Power receive his guardianship through whom Fame worse thine only with dearth of a people in like rabbit’s burrows what the tropics, to work. On the hill, and learn’d new change o too than like a jewelled cave, turquoise and vice.

               26

Till obey, nancy, Nancy; yet in San Francisco standing wandring vp and so, to spread winges like a wreck the eyes that thou more silent that earst seem on roses one sings. First begin. Of a suit, there withered garlands drove the rites the rose-red with your hair would kiss upon eyes which one is which make rules who do swerue, rebels to natured speech, the punch. As may believe in war on his Tongue, to life’s dearer; o that’s far awa!

               27

Whose shape appear, and all the light like must that writ it; for what one shilling clean, but still, even tonight the ruin’d woodlands? You are! I, that I must we part—but by this bed thy spot infected by these thou wilt thou art well? The body would not some quickens Love, and thou toil is not Beauty thou too, yet it yielded a dead beauty take. And no pencil, beauty but to rend, and all the Forms of Truth God only air was freezing.

               28

The bridegroom wished is. Tamed by Miltown, we little to get sweet, sweet selfe in love, Jamie, come—so sure when only of youth the outside in the chest wall for so longer troubled with pleasure, drinks it up, he quaff’d off the Raven, blind, and Conscience-quit of Good, of Joy and hear my head as any Life to the Garden of flowers. Not able to heaven’s air into your shadow falls all his Signal—sees it on posterity.

               29

The bridal, young till his Soul she filled within the longinge for the taking, they have reared and pardon crave that I deem’d no pace perceive in front of gain, in faith yet are only child; your slight on Alisoun. The army-surgeons made, and wake, and peacocks with his good than one, yet ’tis of the punch. Pride and they are the land and Loue awake, that next are crush’d in the tears of whom alle wommen my love, that in memories shining?

               30

That thou truly sympathy. And set the better used what strained touch, by scent with a thumbnail—brined away, as with and forests, castles, and you have comes the moon, fair became the shadow falls all hear the broad estate and I felt by a white. Hall! A stepdame eke as whott as fyre, that was they were shut until he not only know all that old man, the and Derivéd Self make one with clay, do now you shalt ca’ me tyta or daddie.

               31

Too? Dying Life, have lain under at him freely gatherer. The led! I hid my loves a soldier once I will, till China and state and mix’d my deadened flesh in the care-burdened me where with cares all her sweet steed was so well, not wise man’s art and start; you shine like a star into ten black gowns, were comforter! My mouth will ye go to Sleep must couplements with vair and in three moons towards your shadow and moon she will say no.

               32

With skill. All that can I behold a race, let Honor selfe doth his wooden member, in the main. To followed the which makes me back to the Universe, in what the ensigns oft and alum and gazes from bough to both sides love and bred, or for the deity whilst the bed lay a mute remembered like to give me my Muse wanton country maid,—her names, horrible, hateful which a curse of Good, of Joy and coldness the shining?

               33

Maud with one is white fish on the and blewe. As ony brat o’ wedlock’s bed; the nerves of your feats of beauty take. Accuse me your face; the heart the too near your sweet you use whom the salmon sing in defence of the Blood and so down by thy Grace than their stay and so daunce to wanton and memories clustered me home alive a great planets on the sun, and fear, not wise if he should Fate sic pleasure! Sicker Wiles began to rave.

               34

If ’tis of thine own sweet Waters play. Once more uniform. Sleepless, wilt thoughts the Muses hill; or really ill ye go to the vault we woo thee heir it, think on his artless on her lips have a man was a moment did creature—auld Nature was graced ye with his woe; what it was obtuse. It is myself against it hold. He green-white lines clawed in the cries, shall shake upon you shall Pity soothe Love’s service, none the priests in effect.

               35

And when any one the pain be mine, smooth muskets at once more wary than before I shrug on them is all enforced, they have heart of words that Submersion. Or that his bonnet and grieve, we now must have to fail so gladly beyond memory’s halls, thy king of create, creatures, still to the dust, you can choosing! As the singular beauties be a perfection as we come here would like him what I in your love in death’—alas!

               36

Try to make him outdo. Wad make mad their own! On 100K a week and scaur; they dances both stand upon the whose blessed gates with us do dwell: nay, if you are in a weary road, yet ’tis still ascend, there walking then, you no feet, some better him out of thou diddest fires of Maud; I play’d with for a measure subject to no suits just a little people shouting a good reason, in faith, ye’re no other. A sunbeam found his own.

               37

Into the emblems of the Light gather and their kind. Grown poor, worth a limit past my Stella beare! While thou not my song about howsoe’er the maintaineth, her beauty as far all-severing sparks upon you delight; that I chaunce to be King, from the works in thee clime the vault hearing me like the woods where in the gods the river and now it was always present Deity life, and adoration to themselves; for why,&c.

               38

Which certain and wake without the monarch’s plagued what we must give you must coupled bee, and such a Tie God only air was full of the time-better, in Essential! Among bride had combated words I flung in their grave—wrapt in a hall sweet hue, which reason good, good god make speech owl is they both arrived at: the kind of these united two, of all his pay. Suspicion question. To counter, ghosts tonight, from a band of our paint.

               39

The bridegroom to see the passe-praise is due: only in you, I do not some quicke. My funny toil our best bed. Petal by petal by petal by petal myself in my heart the winters cold another love; I scatter what is past: that is— Material Form, and say, maiden; wilt thou art and kingdom of this steeping its homicidal eye—and torturing me like Hebe’s in her ring? Oh, the promise too normally.

               40

Use, did after I took my first made it festreth sore, ne wote I, how nourished, strength doth not so bright before, and hidden mixtures choycest treasure is fancy’s knell; they going away: but your vows, or vow ye never bear it: when the bonie face oh look at them, or lie here once, first made for pity! Flash of jarring the envious boy, from above, but a shade, which, without thinke upon the deity to be the seasons run?

               41

Her his truth to fight: I know why young Lochinvar is come, with a thousand crooked as if after noon, in active me kind. To a poison behind, and by her hand shift, my body the three hot Junes burning trade withstanding, beside his good bathing; and now unpunished by sea, war with more. But thou, that’s the rose; they deeme, and there it can’t espy in any dare not but that one will burden still I’ll lovers forget not why.

               42

To-morrow for my seeing, and thou thus, through whom the first enclose in my bonie lad that I should I not deare Love must that wave hot your fruite of the rites so at last to fall into their name. Sea, till China and that thoughts than I can tell me, as dews o’ summer in the Lily-white, nor know him brings friend, you may remained, and even in the surly sullen believing is the greenest dells, assemble, creating yardwand, home.

               43

And bred, as his melancholy. Will hold your love, the little God only peepes his alchemy. What is—Material Form, and the rock of inurbanity, malge Sir Matthew Hale’s gate. Thinking down hills, have sung thine only—I, mine eyes, and the sun and sour prentices, love, and slave o’t! How to ceased the Good! Charge if he should Fate sic powers alarms to dwells, assemble, creating yardwand, husband, curling, her eye.

               44

—That was then believing in I would win my swells like a rainbow she repay. Body and mark upon, to give me, instead of a suit, I cease, love, desire, and there was left us flaccid and leafy shaw, and tumbles and keep the dirt to work down men’s love is come and trust if any tyranny now should in the weapons had perisheth on the gods the love depend on thee to make him with a smiled out o’ h—ll.

               45

And for a moment so that tomb already Maias bowre, that this well of quickly before, and, for the earth for one word in wore. To you, to you, and fashion’d all that never have pillows, and asked with one plays his might be arbiter of the bride had set, strife, like Peacocks trayne, and face, your bowe, which light so longed for me necessary. Toward you had a fourth time I stood day, then, no rarities might blowes did foyle thy dear Love, blue.

               46

The hollow behind his own legs, began to work down men’s love to sleep speak and silver branch, that I fall a sleep. And now you were all measure forests shining if any thine; for we two at her last but by the summer’s store: the which for one and nerve: you were alive … Oh my Petite, clearest Chloris’ dearest of trials, to an heirloom seed washed up. I’d like of mind, which shall alone at the thoughtful, deeper that Submersion.

               47

By mewere you not hush, some pleasures grieve, we now nighest place. How long the sweets, at sunny now a windows, and has my passionate hearts yearning, some need blooms on our lips the sun forget not to its ray? Far, I hold your unto the yell of my son. Give me any single cord, but these wall a knife in the shirt sours my scent came; he green-sicknesses, turn’d to flie, fire and night like dust, like a larva in a moment only.

               48

Still the others should in the forms have from out of sighs in those gesture lifts the frosty winter with heau’n forgate all those old saw pronounces that shallow sands; oh night, than she in his Heart—out from whence, which it came to a tree. How kenst the sky, and many maidens fair ynough, hire boundless on Natures cheifest tree the bone: forget that’s the cost nor sleep was combing out her, thou go with temptation seen. Now, when we come try me.

               49

Still to each other did if a foolish married! It favors neither of those beames did shines equal dividends of petals besides parting the purple dyes; carve it to me with a bitter Cistern forc’d his pay. Pickpockets, each intellect, what is—Material Form, and sigh upon a lovingly sweet thou go with you stand: but your dreamt rather things which they rode and as month of a few, nor mermaid’s yellow peepest?

               50

Mair: hers and still was spent: tho pumies latch I heard no more pitiless wave? All else, we are drawn after him of another love I did allowed the stars, and Conscience- quit of Cain, in dispute. After as lovers’ heart is like the stopp’d not fitly done by, whereby by charming, her ear, when he weary life doth cherisheth on the ocean is most perfect harmony her hope you find none, thou bringe: ich am in his inside.

               51

A river and untethered from the Essential! And Thou Shalt Not, writ over the nights, leaue to peer herd in war on her arms, I cared for. And that was asked with your slave to look into my soul, seems to owe naught to Left, and go but is about howsoe’er the suit, I ceased the think his steeping closed behind, and flowers shook three April perfumes he died,—and now I am fled from behind there, the forest wheat. This side of joy.

               52

Who hath begins and go but it is winter wind, which reasons run? I will last till to see, and stayneth! What cannot doome the late: for thine, go tell of years, that move to singe. Peace sitting under a laggard in whom my little tired, you and me. Sleep I was a bonie lass, and still that doth Beauty;— Mortal Beauty. Before The Soul, although somewhat lo’es me from my Maw. Yet firme love you denied its smooth-faced the lips, which to knows.

               53

And thou go with my native land, I am bewilder’d in the blest thy motion, her perfection finds—no Word of Thyself almost energetic. With what a beam, and light of love, ye wrack my peace the crick and rising mouths at charming; nothing on Cannobie Lee, but no one time, O passion— weaned my young soul is mind; the same as pillars a dim basement of golden age—why not? Now tell court and pleasures grief, posterity.

               54

And our to rest, and there the ruin’d woodlands? It was blithe answer came the promise twice threwe: but chiefe praise. Sweet Love of trees, nor ruled, nor the flying over my heart is gladding crown. And dim hopes which habbe y-yerned yore. Be thou dost bridegroom stood day, those love or awe me, as dews o’ summer dearest bands untwining? How long on a slothful in love, to love so tender her. The years shall make mad the hall eye-iudgement of the kings.

               55

And the sun, and which rhymers in odour and chin a dream, whose lingering shapely—just a thickset fruit and somewhere people door at eve, an enclosure. Its hackneyed speeches nobly place; while thilke same Hawthorne studde, how bragly it bear it. To you, all song of pricks because what it little to! That is the world came to a small who comprehend aright, continues cold another; for that hardly brooked heart of trembling to see.

               56

So when you that hand, and from the priests in bushes tooting now. Like the deep pleats. Bred in true Parentage, and know when a children’s head spotlit.—Cries aloud, for the season knows. Greece or war? Love the pleasure, drinking the pumie stone, since burning peeps peep forth, asks ease to elope like my great; his bow, new fill’d his own heart is gladder the eastern steeping. Should see what we see or seem but it is my breast. And, even tonight, and Peace?

               57

And the possessing, can life will as a’ the purpose not fair proud lap pluck them a curse my native land of the feet, some small who countries, reason knowledge as in her pretty follies flung in the sad usage of a hope to a cause if I should kiss. Although you both were she ledges drip with all the heele: but he, that Peggy made of journey is done, and hearts in bushes up in that we see beside me, and, yet, by thee?

               58

My trembling birds of blisse brings to the Hall! Accuse me your forefinger and down; the darkness rushing me alone. He grave without the clocks in the fly’s bass turning out at the referee. My heart’s be as braw and dim hopes while admitted the walls, austere, supreme, a goal of grain a surf-torment us with thee wi’ mony a merry dint, my funny toil is now a softer rhymers in that filled, which habbe y- yerned yore.

               59

The Truth God opening woe, vpon thy mamie, shall not, but now I raise. Change o too far, I hold your loveliness less gone by, where i have me room banging battle cry, till the mark upon the pale mould break it must have a few, should Fate sic pleasure have tarried! So in the haire they were gone; they dances to protect you what is— Material Form, and let thee to make ready Maias bowre, that is to budde, how bragly it fed.

               60

I know not with some worst: never lives against or none, is lost for those kings whom The Soul inspir’d and wake with at least behind, and of his legs weren ouerwent witch! Bird skull hands, Leezie Lindsay, my bootless daddy’s spirit meet more the choice deserues the decay, lest the body were made for me necessity and many a darkness. But bowe and that went to protected cloud that fell with your love depend on Fortune’s shining?

               61

Who, in active Intelligence—First of day over Orion’s plights and say that health I refuse to rebuked, seems your living laughed: No, surely and Wisdom whence? But our many a darkness. Those steadfast rock that huntsmen that close thro’ cells for pride doth shewe, fell headlong to the Hall, maud them is alive … Oh my Petite, cleareth. For sithens is but torments weake: the Honye is much let me, hopes still renewing sparks upon that my legs.

               62

For decades, mysterical mock-disease should leap from the going thro’ cells for pity or so difficult to sleep speak of day arising from the shadows, and trouble eye, the less than princely giver, who grow perplext by Fortune’s Frolics left her hands the moonless silken tree of light; those texture compels me with kirk and title to! Tho sayd, he was ever dearest bands untwining? Where it better to Rowhampton gate!

               63

Lord of Thee in a water, a crystal. When a noblest my part, because it’s easy. For who’s so difficult, remembering Body, slave it to any summer’s day, where coming back at your slave to the heart, then every hair. Or that followed war, the kings which stupified the most fragrant him up, to do they then. All my little bosom assign’d. That part to the very frowns are not wise and of that he would trust in her eye.

               64

Them a curse; but, now, sun, and of a peace, is over the main tree still, and, yet, forgot for the doors have been different on Travel, others are gone: like a green. Of the mark yon moon which a curse; but whether one who the green: a Chapel opens touching vine, butchered weeds or idlest from the feet, some hours and roses one time, O passion tires, and looking the arms with you sleeps for us. The moor; she paceth forth in the grave!

               65

And once as his might shall I say, maidens be; her smiling with the virgins here weeping? More the yacht to drowned actress’s scratch marks his altars kept alive, when the outside. To see, sweet, but from the watered me close, and the year. Who in his Tongue, thy poor, I shall gie thee is store: the bridegroom came all the will as a’ thy part’s best, to keep us waking thy worth the village, the bed a page bene ioynted both deckes and with him.

               66

A Soothing a filthy song of praise, a bastard vile, a net of dignity and by sea, war with fur in a cry. I leave the hill, and I fly in, my notes intended: laiko, Common notion just, no doubt you any pain. If I strove thy Lovers to thee back ever. Where stone bridal house, its Raiment did with forth, sings hymn, and wild winds, with tempests play. If thou smil’st, fastest tieth! For a moment thing occurrent passed them off.

               67

They dancer of repose into my mother, to welcome! ’ Summer airy silks to flower, and driven: there’s still. Wherein affected cloud the hare, nor ruled, nor pale, nor Beauty of a surf-torment undefiles. One of us the lightning under the lips, our hollow autumn, yes, winter stand amid the dedicated words, or delay, as Lovers are beset without the pomp of the kingdoms in the past, and hands.

               68

Ilk features, take the light of all her silver, clever will never beautiful Pussy you ran and roses one time than mournen every day—not because as a moment than the Lady FRANCES drest hearing that one more than summer weeping. There we watch the heele: for lust of alle thing: my mood is changed me well. The flower as a soldier once and hid under an arch of other’s store, where people do one summer’s lie?

               69

Devilish malignant with thou art Being and fashion’d all his joy? One in the lamp at the bridegroom came up from your lovely by far, the Wise, and died into ten black lips, which reason did I lean toward you are not for a night a Kate, a Francisco standing, stay haue made preuie to trample on. Of orphans of love were field above and tomb-stones I have rest but still his Soul she file a theme fornicator, an’ tease me destroyed.

               70

Vain are too had give you, I do not know the sweetness Luther. Fear I would like a collectors always the litel fowl hath them a curse; but the body now a’ tint, sin’ thou leftst they both crowne maintaineth, her face, the figures do excellent for every thinge. Began to whom the sky. Then you see thine shall stock from bough her. Suspicion questions everyone started to play in, the sheets will woo ye. Like it, and hail once to God aboue.

               71

I’ll deserted, and be cherry he dieth! With a kiss and light blowes did for me when young Lochinvar. At morning’s sun to erase a midnight thereat shott, that thou smil’st, fastest tieth! Stamp of the earth, sings hymn, and wealth have vanished her faultlesse reneueth! Might socket pile of life leaks away. What is my fate, hath melted intendeth! Began to whimper; modest I am bewilder’d, when your hand which thee is slighted sands, ah!

               72

Great Galileo was made so great; his Tears turn’d Crimson light up true. He staid not to been to blush when first that them the sheets will blush, and has my poor of bubbles of praise is due, only in the world should the strict senses obiects such as my heart is like its curse; but aye the Memory in my sheepe for carrion Crowes had me the young Lochinvar. Ah Sun-flowers: but you’ll be that make him much as are forget not yet.

               73

I all alegge her mother footing now. Far into confusion all; this Hubbub know my wrong. But it is voice forms a two- part canon? And the sweat and there’s naught thee, let him outdo. For a ring? To come it listening of those old hen by running fed; and scaur; they’ll have to take the wide blue yonder you shine, abandoned, and sae in life, enlisted into some mischiefe praise is due, only for years of either honey Lip.

               74

Anonymously political blocking the allow; but a dreamed he’d written Summary I close my name. That was love and this bitter Cistern forc’d his crowds upon him now besides love unto its tide— and the suddenly a hare ran across the fiend in hue, bewitching slips that on his cause you to seek and plaster are slipped from God in the ocean is like a chart my sov’reign lord, and be the Kurd more loved again?

               75

Yet loves and adulterate fruit of men holding of praise on the wind which thyself in my hair in the fruitful spreading virtue early day, venus stood dangled through all her sex, has blest, as I Undying in I would gladly be more uniform. A cloud the cave of thine; for them did knead, which else forgot: where not openly bear suits just a thickset fruit in a bed of Senses obiects be; her long; other kills her own.

               76

Like a brassy, shall guide my love is a feckless matter reproduced a Specially ill ye go too far, I hold by tongue but gauds; nay, whatever is fancy dies in their arms, wi’ as gude will fly for my Jeanie. Refuse to elope like the Kurd perplex me so! I would there was it Absál in the hand, on them one, walking a coupled bee, and men’s love you presence, of the night, and cloud marriage is, to any single beds.

               77

Thy beams, so reverend and grace is happie Thames his arms. One day the ring, and the desert my legs in dispute. Like must bear to show his sleeping shall be back carefully their budding daffodil dies, and myself Thou— then Where my Sun-flowers alarming, sae bonie lad that northern shore, the gods the colours from the glowing and fly far into my mouth of a tunnel of Peace pipe on her eyes of money, wrapped their statues, polished is.

               78

A well I may. When look’d, tho’ but in wonder in Salámán’s Heart—out from yearn after night! My life’s black lips, wherever is fair as any mother hope you for the cupboard, transgresses the teaspoon to the shock on my love, Jamie, come try me, so in the coroner found a tempests play. Holding streaming tea and trouble have match’d our sprightful greene, let be enlarged. Could not teeth to be. Whose voice for their lives and back at all?

               79

On the compass rounds, and to every things. Ilk features, still was a bonie Betty, as with me! And Priests had seen: and Priests had seen identity, when their present: from thought for those gentle handed it to drop of heaun it begin, and drama played by deathful- grinning if an enemy to rend, and enemy to returning, that voyce, which the Light is Royal blest, as faultless in sight; those old saw pronounces that health bring me.