#“Will I ever be forgiven for the crime of my life?

[architectpoet]

If I follow the starlight and call your name

Will I see you again on the astral plane?

Why did learnin' the truth make me feel worse?

Tell me, how does a man change the universe?

The Balancer’s Eye - Lord Huron

[chaoticamalgamation]

I've come to the realization that being put into catholicism at a young age really fucked me up in so many ways, but especially in the way that I view both sex and my own body as a taboo subject

if I ever looked at myself in the mirror when I was younger, and even now to this day, I would feel like I was bearing witness to something I should not look at for too long, even though it was my own body

and honestly, that's how I came away with such a lot of trauma, always finding ways to censor myself or to feel shameful about things that are inherently human. I had nothing to be embarrassed about, I was a literal child. children, by large, are just large little human sponges that soak up whatever information you give them, so they can't do anything sinful unless that is what you inform them of. it's like God in the garden if eden, if he'd have never told the two that the tree was forbidden to eat from, they would have never committed the great atrocity because there would have been nothing atrocious in indulging in a garden you were told was yours.

[saintsenara]

If Voldemort had repented and felt remorse like Harry offered him, what exactly would have happened to him? Would his soul have been healed and he forgiven? I mean, I’m pretty sure he would definitely be thrown into Azkaban for life, but would he be normal again? Like, no longer that bald, no-nose snake face creep and his soul intact.

thank you very much for the ask, @hollyparker! i can think of no question more suitable for this season of allhallowtide.

canon is clear that genuine remorse would have resulted in the fissures in voldemort's soul being healed:

"Isn't there any way of putting yourself back together?" Ron asked. "Yes," said Hermione with a hollow smile, "but it would be excruciatingly painful." "Why? How do you do it?" asked Harry.  "Remorse," said Hermione. "You've got to really feel what you've done. There's a footnote. Apparently the pain of it can destroy you. I can't see Voldemort attempting it somehow, can you?"

so, the only thing necessary to trigger the healing of the soul is the feeling of remorse. there's no need to perform any sort of public penance, nor even to actually say out loud that you're sorry. you just need to be sorry, and the slate of your soul is wiped clean.

[that is - as we'll come to below - your salvation is achieved by faith alone, rather than by works and rituals...]

so yes, voldemort would be forgiven. but only in the theological - rather than the psychological, social, or legal - sense of the word.

his victims wouldn't suddenly be expected to be fine with him, his slate wouldn't be wiped clean in the eyes of the wizarding legal system, and he would still be expected to be punished for what he'd done. if he survives putting his soul back together, instead of dying on the spot, he's definitely looking at life in azkaban - if not a capital sentence - and he'd deserve it. and if he dies, he's still going to be remembered as an evil man, rather than the history of his crimes being erased by his deathbed repentance. he would simply rot in azkaban and/or die with an intact soul.

but what about with an intact appearance?

canon doesn't ever discuss what would happen to voldemort's body if he healed his soul, and either option - that his appearance would revert or that it wouldn't - is justifiable. but my view is certainly that healing his soul would trigger the transformation of his appearance.

[i don't have a preference on whether this means he would revert to the body he had when he first split his soul - that is, his appearance would be as it was when he was sixteen - or if he'd be his canonical age, just with a human face. either makes one hell of a premise for a fic.]

voldemort's physical degradation is directly caused by making horcruxes - right down to the very first time he splits his soul - and it accelerates as he goes beyond the norms of even this darkest of magic. the version of him which visits hepzibah smith - who has made two horcruxes: the diary and the ring - is very thin, very pale, and heavily implied to look quite sickly, and he also has a red gleam in his eyes. the version who comes to see dumbledore for a job interview - who has made four or five horcruxes: the diary, the ring, the cup, the diadem, and possibly the locket - is unnaturally pale, has skin which looks like melted wax, has eyes which are starting to look permanently bloodshot, and [much to harry's disappointment] is no longer good-looking. creating harry - rather than his resurrection ritual - is what seems to cause his looks to degrade further, since the voldemort of philosopher's stone is described facially in identical ways to the voldemort of goblet of fire, although the creation of nagini probably makes these features even more horrifying.

as a narrative device, voldemort's physical changes has an enormous amount in common with the gradual disfigurement of the portrait in the picture of dorian gray.

in both texts, damage visited upon the soul - and, indeed, damage visited upon the soul in pursuit of immortality - is visited upon the face [although in dorian's case, this damage is confined to the portrait, while his flesh-and-blood self lives behind a mask of false youth and beauty]. at the end of the novel, dorian - horrified at the portrait's appearance - resolves to mend his ways, but only does so half-heartedly [by deciding that not seducing a woman he feels nothing for is enough to cancel out murder and driving two people to suicide], which causes no change to the portrait. in a fit of rage, he destroys the portrait rather than attempting true repentance. this kills him, and when his body is discovered his appearance is the monstrous one of the painting. that is, he - like voldemort - finally has to wear the damage to his soul on his face.

from which we can reasonably suppose that the impact of true repentance on the soul would reflect similarly on the face. voldemort being returned to his former humanity - then - would be the proof [since, as we've seen, he wouldn't need to prove his remorse through works or words] that his repentance was genuine and he had - again, only in the theological sense of the word - been forgiven.

but he's still going to be thrown in azkaban, or hurled through the veil, or die on the spot even if he's pretty again. it doesn't change anything about what he's done on earth.

what it changes is his experience in the afterlife.

the text approaches the possibility of voldemort's remorse very interestingly. by which i mean, it presents it not just as a purgative act, but as a quasi-baptismal one.

the wizarding world canonically has two stable spheres of existence - life and afterlife. there's no suggestion in canon that this afterlife attaches a moral price to admission - that is, it doesn't seem to function as [the christian] heaven, and nor does there seem to be an in-universe version of [the christian] hell - but it does require something: an intact soul.

in between these two spheres is a liminal space - the theshold between life and death which appears to harry as king's cross. this threshold exists so that the newly dead [those who aren't harry, whose experience is unique, at least] can make a choice - to move on to the afterlife or to return to the sphere of the living as a ghost.

there's some implication in canon that it takes some people longer to accept the need to move on to the afterlife than others - and so there's some sense of the threshold serving a similar purpose to purgatory, and serving as an intermediate space in which an intact soul sheds all the baggage it's carried with it from life before it settles happily into death.

but in voldemort's case, it represents something very different... limbo.

and, specifically, the limbo of infants.

this term refers to the permanent - rather than liminal - sphere in which the souls of unbaptised babies linger, unable - since they've never been cleansed of original sin via baptism, but also haven't committed any sins of their own [since, y'know, they're babies] - either to access heaven or to be condemned to hell.

within the metaphysics of canon, then, voldemort's mutilation of his soul has a similar impact to the state of unbaptism. it prevents him from moving across the threshold between life and death, thus causing him to get stuck forever - in a baby-like form! - in the liminal space of king's cross.

and this is fascinating.

as deathly hallows reaches its climax, the themes and tropes the doylist narrative draws upon are overtly christian. harry freely chooses to die for the salvation of the world, rises again from the dead, and then protects anyone who believes in him from coming to harm at voldemort's hands with the supernatural force of his love. numerous other characters have arcs in the final book which have similarly christian overtones - lily as the virgin mary [who crushes the serpent's head, before her son defeats him entirely], dumbledore as john the baptist [who teaches and guides harry-as-christ, but is subordinate to him in greatness], and ron as st peter [who abandons harry-as-christ and then returns to him].

but - crucially - its christian tropes are not simply christian. they are protestant.

and voldemort - as much as his christian-literature archetype is satan [hence all the snake imagery] - is approached by the text, especially when it comes to the text's treatment of his horcruxes, with christian allegories which are catholic.

the horcruxes are relics, and his belief that they - rather than faith in the power of love as the text understands it - will save him is delusional. jkr has heavily implied in several interviews that they are created via a cannibalistic ritual - which calls to mind the doctrine of transubstantiation in the catholic eucharist. there are seven of them, just as there are seven sacraments in the catholic church, since voldemort believes seven to be the most powerful magical number - something he's wrong about, since the seven-fold power of his horcruxes is nothing in the face of harry's faith in the trinity of the hallows. and his clinging to them condemns him to a post-death state which calls the limbo of infants - which, while not official catholic doctrine, is a hypothetical concept only catholic theology entertains; all mainstream protestant and orthodox denominations reject it entirely - to mind.

it's a really interesting example of what both the doylist and watsonian texts believe him to have transgressed through the creation of horcruxes.

because, of course, he's not condemned to limbo for the sin of murder, he's condemned to it because he puts his faith in something other than faith [or love] alone.

[theheirofthesharingan]

The way everything Itachi does and says gets twisted to make him look despicable will always be hysterical.

Itachi: I committed a crime by annihilating my clan. I deserve to be punished. This is why I pushed Sasuke towards the path of hatred, so he could hate me enough to kill the person who committed such a severe crime.

Fandom: Itachi planned his own suicide as a way to escape punishment. What a selfish bastard.

the same people: He doesn't get enough hate.

the same people: He doesn't get punished for his crimes. He deserved the worst.

Itachi: Only I deserve to be blamed for the massacre. Only I'm responsible for the mess.

Fandom: Why doesn't he take the responsibility? He got away so easily.

the same people: He's justifying Konoha. Konoha bootlicker. He should take the full responsibility and also blame everyone.

the same people: But don't blame his parents and the clan though. They CLEARLY did not use him for their own gains. They were only the victims. :(

Itachi: I don't deserve to be forgiven for what I did to Sasuke. He doesn't have to forgive me. As a result, I cannot allow myself to show him much affection because I'm not worthy of it. He should be around people who love him and haven't hurt him like I did.

Fandom: He showed Sasuke SOME affection. He manipulated Sasuke and turned him into a Konoha bootlicker too.

the same people: Itachi was so cruel before his goodbye. Why couldn't he show Sasuke MORE affection?

the same people: Itachi wanted Naruto to manipulate Sasuke and have him do what Itachi thought was right.

Itachi: I have felt nothing but guilt and regret for my deeds my whole life.

Fandom: So what? Why is he acting in accordance with that guilt? Why is his behavior not a perfect reflection of what I want him to do?

the same people: He himself says he had no regrets before his death. No mistranslation spotted there. To defend my favorites, though? I'll make sure to use the best sources to justify them. Not Itachi. No mistranslation in manga can ever exist.

The hypocrisy in this fandom is boundless.

[enby-axels]

probably my most unpopular mdzs opinion ever is that lan wangji is trauma bonded to lan xichen. and i mean that in the truest sense of the term in which a victim feels emotionally attached to their abuser, not referring to the distorted, pop psychology definition of two people bonding because they experience trauma together.

i know people wont like this because they cling to the idea of lan xichen being made of idk sunshine and sparkles. but you can be a superficially nice person and also enable horrific violence; this is literally one of the main points mdzs is making about his character. similarly, you can love someone and want what [you think] is best for them, but also harm and, yes, abuse them. this too is true of lan xichen, who — in his position as his clan's leader — punished lan wangji nearly to death for the crime of protecting the love of his life, who himself was just trying to protect war refugees from collective punishment. and then let his clan participate in the murder of said refugees and also the love of his brother's life. (yall: lwj injured 33 of his clan's seniors! me: and who put him in that position. why were they following him in the first place. do you seriously think he would raise his sword against his own clan unless he had no choice)

and like you can make up a million excuses for lan xichen, tell yourself it wasnt that bad or that it cant possibly qualify as abuse even though there's an established power imbalance and a violent exploitation of said power imbalance which lan wangji is in no position to defy, even by the end of the novel. and im sure lan xichen himself made similar excuses to himself to justify his actions so he could sleep at night, but the fact of the matter is that mdzs the novel is naaawwwwt condoning his actions. there's a clear perpetrator of violence here, and also a clear victim

all this to say that lan wangji's relationship with his clan and his direct blood relations is much more complex than popular interpretations acknowledge. as if this isnt clear enough from him being the second jade, the spare to his brother the heir, the politically less important brother who was sent to the wen indoctrination while his older brother fled, the secondborn son whose truths are repeatedly subordinated to his clan leader's lies. twin jades of lan is an ironic title, in the same way twin heroes of yunmeng is ironic. theyre not twin anythings. they were never equals, in moral character or political power

so yeah, lan wangji does love and has probably even forgiven his brother. but what other choice does he have?

[piratefishmama]

Forgiven not Forgotten | Part 5

Two years.

Two whole years in that void.

Two years of his life. Gone. And he remembered none of it.

He didn’t even have time to ask questions either, because the moment the words “what happened?” left his lips, someone was pushing to get into the room.

“Everyone not involved with the Hawkins incident, I want you out of this room immediately.” A badge was flashed before the officials could argue, and a woman, unfamiliar to Eddie, but clearly having been through the ringer herself missing an arm and sporting one hell of a scar over the left side of her face, pushed her way through. “That means you officers, out.”

They didn’t argue, both leaving without question. Government.

“Stinson?” Steve was the first to identify her, while the others just looked on in surprise “you’re alive? Is Owens—”

“Despite the real effort those things put in to make it otherwise, yes. I’m here. Owens is permanently wheelchair bound but he’s okay. Mr and Mrs Harrington” She nodded to the two in the back, Steve’s parents holy shit. Okay. “I’ll allow you to stay on account of the fact that I don’t know what you’ve been told already. Mr Thompson, I thank you for your attendance however the government will take over from here. You’re not needed.” ‘Harold’ took one look at the Harringtons, then another to the men waiting outside the door, and chose wisely.

“Sorry John, government. I’m way over my head here.” He uttered, before making his quiet exit.

“I’m never hiring him again.” John sighed with a roll of his eyes, while Lynda stared Stinson down with an air of contempt.

“As if you could make us lea—"

“I’m the government, Mrs Harrington, I absolutely could have you removed. Now—” she turned back to the kids “I’ve already spoken with Hopper and the others, this… this issue is more important than their involvement. I know you don’t want to sign them, I know you have every right to tell the government to go fuck itself, I would too in your situation.” She rummaged through her bag, it took a little more effort than it would have normally given the missing other arm, but she made do, producing a folder from within. She placed it on the bed and opened it. A stack of NDA’s. “The government are prepared to clear Mr. Munson’s name, completely, without it ever going to trial, we have a number of names to take the fall for it, all perfectly believable with fabricated eye witnesses, but they only do this, if these are signed.”

“Are you blackmailin—” John spoke up, only to be cut off by the woman with a stern glare.

“Yes. Yes I am. I would rather not be. Listen, they will throw Mr. Munson under the bus, without hesitation, he’s the easiest person to pin this on as the story is already out there and people already believe it. You want their help, it needs to be a two way street. They are prepared to completely clear Munson’s name, and pin the crimes on someone else, they are prepared to create false witnesses, they’re even offering money. What you know is worth millions, and they will pay it to keep you quiet, but if you do not sign these… the second he’s cleared for release, he goes to jail for the murders of Chrissy Cunningham, Fred Benson, Patrick McKinney, and the attempted murder of Maxine Mayfield. You sign them, he leaves with you, a free man. His name will be publicly cleared by the days end. We’ll even make a hero out of him.”

“He is a hero” Dustin argued, a frown on his face.

“Exactly, I agree. The public don’t though. They will when we’re done with them. We need you to sign these” She looked at the Harringtons. “All of you. I’ll leave you with these and wait outside, call me back in when you’ve made your decision.” And with that, she walked out unhindered, leaving them all struck silent.

Until Steve moved. He grabbed the folder first, picking up the pen.

“Steve” Eddie started before anyone else could.

“You’re not going to jail, Eddie. I don’t give a fuck. It’s one piece of paper to sign and honestly who’d believe us if we told anyone anyway? Monsters running or flying through town killing people? Evil vines putting slugs in dead people, spores that kill shit, toxic air? Other dimensions? We’d be called insane, they’d probably class it as a mass hallucination from a gas leak or some shit, they’d put us all in the looney bin the second we opened our mouths. They’re offering to clear your name, and all we have to do is sign some stupid piece of paper. So I’m signing it.”

It was signed before anyone could stop him. And being legally an adult, it was binding. He passed the folder to Dustin, who while not legally an adult, signed it anyway. Then, both young men turned to the adults.

“Steven…”

“Sign it. Sign it and he’s cleared. These people don’t mess around, mom. No doubt the others have already signed. I get you don’t think it’s right, really I do, but—”

“Give it here, son.” John stepped forward and took the offered folder and pen, and was about to sign on the dotted line when—

“Good heavens, at least read it, John” Lynda took the folder from him, eyes on the document, skimming the lines on the page for anything that could fuck them over. “…Oh, give me the damn pen” she took that too, quickly scribbling her signature on her own before passing it back to her husband to sign. “The nerve of these people. This is blatant blackmail. Did he even—was he ever even guilty? Of anything?”

“No, he wasn’t. Unfortunate case of wrong place wrong time… twice. As unbelievable as that is.” Steve sighed, a huge feeling of relief washing over him. Eddie would be okay. He wasn’t dead, he wasn’t going to jail, he’d be fine. This incredibly stupid boy would be okay. “He’ll need a place to stay, Wayne’s—"

Eddie was sat up in an instant, his body complaining but he ignored it “Where’s Wayne? Is he okay? Is he safe? Is he—"

“Whoa whoa, big guy,” Dustin was quick to his side, a hand on his shoulder to steady him as that heart monitor went wild “calm down, Wayne’s okay, he got out before the barricades went up. We don’t know exactly where he went, but we’ll find him, okay? It just might take a bit of time.”

“In the meantime, he can stay with us.” All three sets of eyes turned to John Harrington as he closed the folder, holding it in one hand, Lynda smiling beside him, apparently content with the idea “Our current house only has two bedrooms, but we’ll make do until we can arrange to purchase something larger. I assume Miss Buckley will be staying too until we can find her parents. It’ll be a full house, might be a bit cramped, but we’ll manage. I’ve been stuck in stuffy boardrooms with more people for hours on end, and we hated each other. It’ll be okay.”

“I… dunno, is that—” Steve hesitated, of course Steve hesitated, Eddie didn’t blame him, they barely knew each other. Sure they had shared trauma but that didn’t really mean much between complete strangers. “I mean—” Steve looked at him “will you be comfortable? Staying with… with me?” and wasn’t that just the weirdest question Steve could have asked him.

“Dude… shouldn’t I be asking you that? I’m the freak here, why wouldn’t I be—sure! I’m fine with that, I mean, stranger things have happened, right?”

“Heh, right… if—if you’re sure it won’t make you uncomfortable or anything…”

“A jester in a palace, hanging out with a king, my my, how in the world could I be uncomfortable with that?” He smiled, wide, teasing, his cheeks dimpled as Steve rolled his eyes with obvious fondness.

Lynda grabbed her husbands’ arm subtly, taking his attention just long enough for her to utter the word “Dimples” at him while Dustin kept the others attention with his complaining about Steve getting to stay with Eddie. Steve immediately firing back with the fact that Dustin was staying too until they could find Claudia and not to be dumb.

He looked down at her with a small frown, then back at Eddie, realisation dawning on him just as quickly as it did his wife.

“Dimples.”

Part 7

[prinzrupprecht]

To Live or Die

Chapter 5 - the truth and acceptance

I’m back to my next level of Okita stage coping since the leaks. If you’re new here, read the previous parts! Click on synopsis and see all the chapters linked.

Synopsis

TW: hurt/comfort

WC: 965

Kondo-san and your uncle were in another room talking. You assumed they were practically catching up over the years. Souji was quiet like you were. Were you both waiting for the other to break the silence? You sighed while deciding that Souji won this game with the awkward tension. “It’s been a while…” you mumbled while keeping your head down.

You couldn’t even make eye contact with him. He was just as shy and nervous as you were. “How have you been?” he asked. It was better to change the subject for the better. His question made you think after the war you didn’t honestly expect to see him again. His words struck you before how he wanted to help his friends in battle fighting for their lives and beliefs. Souji said if he were to die then it would be in a spectacular battle. What changed?

“I’m… doing okay. What about you?” You had no idea whether you were telling the truth. Were you okay? Probably not. Your heart started fluttering again. You casually brought one of your fingers up to your cheekbone while awkwardly smiling. You tilted your head a bit to get a good look at him.

“I told you already with the letter I sent.” He muttered as if he was more disappointed with your response. You looked down and thought for a moment what he said. Was he hinting how he missed you?

“Sorry, I’m not great with words.” You muttered and it was silent for a good minute between you two. You didn’t really give him much about your new life in your letter. You wanted to ask him things as he did but neither of you knew how to talk to one another properly like before. Were things completely ruined between you two?

“Are you still mad at me?” he gripped the top of his knees unsure if what he did would ever be forgivable to you.

“To you? No. I am with myself. You shouldn’t apologize when I can’t even properly give you one.” Your words affected him when he knew you all too well. You still somewhat resented him for leaving and choosing to fight in a war that wasn’t winnable. What did you mean by that? He has already long forgiven the things you said.

You were closing yourself off from people getting close to you again. “No. I can’t ever make up for the past. I don’t regret choosing my beliefs and keeping my promises to the others, and Kondo-san. I still always cared about you, it was just the wrong place at the wrong time for both of us.” Okita realized what he was saying would hurt you, but he couldn’t lie either.

You kept silent and pursued your lips from getting emotional. “But— but we’re here now right?” Okita saw how saddened you were. You tried to crack a smile at his enthusiasm.

“Ya… I suppose,” you quietly said. Kondo-san and your uncle returned laughing with one another. You and Souji looked at them wondering what they talked about.

“What is going on?” you had asked and your uncle looked at Kondo.

“I think you should go back with them,” your uncle broke the tension in the room. You stared at him with confusion.

“Huh?” You were wondering why. You looked at Okita who didn’t make eye contact with you.

“I don’t… understand?” This was difficult for Arashi to explain to you how the area is consumed with illegal gangs and former members of Tosa have migrated down to Yokohama to operate their crimes in the dark.

“You’re just not safe here, if you can at least give them a chance… you’ll find that closure but it won’t be here. I know things have been hard for you.” He stopped and saw you looking down at your hands. Kondo stood back in silence while he was relatively glad you weren’t resisting the temptation to stay in Yokohama.

“What about you?” you asked. Your uncle sucked in a breath before looking at Kondo.

“After you got attacked earlier, that man knows your face and the gang he associates with… it’s too dangerous for you to stay here.” He avoided your question and it was difficult for you to decide.

You wanted some time to decide whether you would risk your life staying in Yokohama or go back with Kondo and Souji. “You didn’t answer my question.” You chewed the inside of your cheek.

“I’ll— I’ll be fine, I promise. Your life is more in jeopardy than mine. I run the docks down here, they won’t come for me.” Arashi ruffled your hair a bit making you pout. You had no idea if he was telling you the truth or just making the situation sound less bad than what it already was.

“If anything we’ll come back if Arashi-san is in trouble, right Kondo-san?” Souji spoke up. You crossed your arms but thought of it as him trying to get you to leave but maybe he was right and that your life is in danger now. Who would be better to keep you safe? The obvious answer would be Kondo and Souji.

“Fine, when do we leave?” You looked at Kondo and back to Souji.

“Soon, I have to get back to the department in a day or so since I’m here without proper clearance.” You briefly looked at your uncle and excused yourself to grab a few of your things.

How did things have to turn out this way? Now you’re returning to live with them again like old times? It feels incredibly odd and not real. The war took that from you, right? You were hurt still but maybe over time you’ll heal again and move on. Only time can do that.

Proceed to the next part

➤ Chapter 6

[tritoch]

wild to me to see posts like "wow everything in the tempest is named after shakespeare...emet you melodramatic bitch you sure loved theater". because the prospero-emet thing gets played up so hard in the english script and you can carry it so far!

like prospero is an asshole magician who, after being deposed by his brother as duke of milan, settles himself and his daughter on a remote island, enslaves the local spirits using his magic, and bitterly plots to reclaim his past glories. he rules through violence and deceit, and only survives and is reconciled when his plots reach their fruition and his brother is taken to his remote island and plots ensue and everyone decides he was totally right all along and they were huge dicks to him and they're sooooo sorry and he gets to go back and be duke again wow! and it's okay because he's like "i was only doing mean magic to get my rightful spot back and now i'm giving it up because magic is evil. :)"

the tempest is what emet wants his life to be. prospero is not a villain in the text of the tempest. he is barely treated as antagonistic by the text and framing of the play itself. all his abuses, his neglect and control of his daughter, his enslavement of caliban and ariel (local spirits/monsters/people of the island), his deception and plots against his brother, his abuse of magical powers (not awesome, from the pov of the contemporary audience), all that ultimately gets swept aside in the rightness of his return to milan and the warm feeling of the world being set to rights. prospero can't undo the years he spent on the island but they are ultimately a blip in his life before he returns to the rightful state of affairs. his abuse and enslavement of caliban, easily the worst thing he does in the play, is totally set aside when caliban goes "wow now i see how truly benevolent my master is. i love him and see the ways of christian good and i'm so, so appreciative he chose not to kill or beat me even though he totally could have and would have been in the right. he's so just and intelligent." everyone loves and forgives him and they all agree both his management of the island and his ultimate return are so good and so wise and so right.

emet comparing himself to the tempest (or being compared to it, depending on how you want to read the diegetic status of the place names) is absolute wishcasting. it is an attempt to manifest the happy ending he will never, ever get because his sins cannot and would not be forgiven in the way he wants. he wants to imagine himself as the righteous returned duke whose crimes, including the enslavement, abuse, and exploitation of those he saw as his rightful inferiors, were totally worth it, i promise. and if emet is prospero, the warrior of light is his caliban.

[calbeeko]

"will i ever be forgiven

for the crime of my life?

will it haunt me 'til i die?"

[certifiedrat]

Will I ever be forgiven/For the crime of my life?

This song is very Jotarocoded I think… anyway here’s a piece that took forever to render. I’m really happy with how it turned out though! The symbolism is a little on the nose I think but that’s alright

[moirindeclermont]

Welcome, welcome Bridgerton folks!

It's time for the third episode of "The Captain and The Spy", aka Captain Colin Bridgerton, Pirate and an agent of the Queen herself, forced to marry the recently discovered Lady Whistledown - who must act as a spy for the Queen to have her crimes forgiven.

(Today a bit early but I'm going to the cinema after this... My brother convinced me to give Solo Leveling a chance)

---

Several days pass and Pen do not know what to think, to be honest. Everyone on the ship is very kind - she did not expect this but the cook told her that Captain Colin did not tollerate disrespect towards women, elders and children... As if she had to find one more reason to like him.

He was gorgeous and a mind to match her in way she never expected to find.

She knew she was being seduced by him, but day after day her resistances and reticences were being shredded by Colin.

As far as she knew she was the only one allowed to call him Colin ("a courtesy to my wife" he said about it and her knees almost gave out).

The thing that really confused her was that Colin was telling her things. He was confiding in her, like he would do with a wife (even knowing she had to report back to the Queen).

Ever more confusing was that he listened to her tale about lady Whistledown and to her surprise, she didn't lie.

He was an attentive listener and asked her deep questions about her motivation and what she wanted to know after the Queen forgave her (the fact he also believed the Queen would forgive her was bonkers).

They passed daya and then weeks, just talking. Colin sometimes looked at her with a look in his eyes that told her he wanted to kiss her (or more) but he didn't follow through.

Until everything changed.

They were near the coast of France when she heard him telling everyone to be ready, and the moment after he was near her, taking her hand. "You stay in your apartment, I'll tell you when it's safe to come out," and he was very serious about it, so serious that she didn't question it.

He accompanied her and she realized in that moment he might fight... Or worse.

Colin, in the middle of barking order left and right, noticed her being suddenly nervous.

They were now on the entrance of her apartment. "What is it, Pen?" (He started to call her like that, and everytime she smiled like an idiot at the nickname, but this time she was too worried)

"I've just realized how dangerous your life is..."

He smiled "you want to go back?"

"I'm worried for you, dummie!"

She told him, surprising even herself.

He looked at her dumbfounded!

And then she heard him murmuring "Screw this" and the moment after she was pick up, the hard wood of the door on her back, as Colin stopped literally on her lips. "Tell me you don't want this..."

Pen gulped, looked at him and shook her head. "I want this.." she said instead and Colin moaned before closing the almost inexistent gap between them.

When she imagine her first kiss, it was something sweet and tender, a trembling contact.

Instead... This was fire and passion.

Colin took possession of her lips and didn't hold back. She was being devoured and the only thing she could do was trying to devour him back.

She didn't know that kisses could be so messy but there wasn't time. She could hear the first clash of swords and Colin, reluctantly, put her down.

"Thank you love. Now, I know we can win. And after, I'll come back here and reprise this conversation."

And with that he give her another light peck on her lips, before going and closing the door behind him.

She traced her lips with her fingers, hoping she would see him again. "Not now," she prayed, "don't you dare, God, to take him away from him now that I love him".

The thought come unbidden but it made total sense. She was in love with a Pirate. It was going to be a wild ride indeed.

Tbc

[billyshakesp]

In the Hope of a Future Forgiveness

Forgiveness has huge symbolic implications in the Locked Tomb for many of the characters, namely Gideon and Harrow and their quest against religious trauma. I could write so much about this, but that would be more suited to a literature classroom (or AO3) than to Tumblr, so, instead, I want to focus in on one particular example that I hold very dear. Disclaimer: this is one interpretation of Harrohwark's words which I have come to. If this has already been said by someone else, I do not know of it. If you don't agree with this take, please share with me.

In Harrowhark's self-adressed letter outlining the parameters for the rest of her life as a Lyctor (which, by the way, she hoped would "extend into the next myriad," but Harrowhark's lobotomy era only lasted nine months, so RIP babygirl), she signs off with:

In the hope of a future forgiveness, I have remained, Harrowhark Nonagesimus

It's clear that Harrowhark has huge conflictions with her right to exist as a human being; thus, the most obvious interpretation of this line is that she hopes to be forgiven for the crime of breaking into the Tomb, and also for the genocide her parents mandated. However, this begs the obvious question, "forgiveness from whom?"

Harrowhark Nonagesimus wrote this in her pre-lobotomy era, so we don't have to reckon with the implications of Harrow digging her cavalier out of her skull, along with a few spoons of grey matter as collateral damage. With that in mind, forgiveness from whom?

To her knowledge, her entire house is dead. She is the last person left. I'm not too confident as to pre-lobotomy Harrow's relationship with God, but she definitely holds her accountable for Gideon's death. I don't think she cares for that man much (Which is good. Fuck God).

Gideon, of course, is the one Harrow wants to forgive her, whether she admits it to herself or not. Harrow has given her life to justify her birth, to become the greatest necromancer her house has ever produced, and perhaps the greatest necromancer the Nine Houses has ever seen. She says herself that she wants to make herself a living monument for those that died so that she could live, and live powerfully. And yet, at the end of Gideon the Ninth, Harrow attempts to offer her own life to Gideon in a desperate and albeit half-baked plan to save her cavalier. The gesture of self-sacrifice is sweet and all, but it really, really hits powerfully here; when Harrow gives Gideon her life, she is essentially saying to Gideon that Gideon is the justification of Harrow's existence. One could argue that she was sacrificing herself to the Tomb, but I think that if the Tomb was what Harrow truly cared about, she wouldn't have been so eager to let herself die. Also, she probably wouldn't have been so eager to drive a hammer into her skull.

In not so many words, Gideon is Harrow's absolution. She is her forgiveness. For Gideon Nav, Harrow sees her life as "worth it," and for Gideon Nav, Harrow sees her death as "worth it." I know I'm romanticising this with my language, so I want to take a brief moment to say that Harrowhark is so, so, so fucked up by her childhood trauma. This isn't beautiful, this isn't the perfect friendship, the perfect love; it's a mistake. Nonetheless, it's Gideon that embodies the reason for her existence. Gideon is forgiveness.

When Harrow writes the letters in "the hope of a future forgiveness," it is in the hope that she will find some measure of absolution for the crimes committed by her parents. It is also in the hope that can save the first flower and the last child of her house. She "remains Harrowhark Nonagesimus" for Gideon. She lives in the immortal hope of Gideon's resurrection. I think there's so much grief and tragedy and sorrow carved into just those few words; so much more than I originally saw in them.

Thanks for reading. Drink water, eat food, and worship the ground your friends walk on and the air they breathe. If you're reading these words as the product of the deaths of a generation of children, then know that if you just live, and live for the people you love, then that's enough. <3

[sunset-telepath]

i powered through unraveled mostly out of a morbid sense of horror and disbelief and i must ask, will we ever be graced with sunset's thoughts on this magnificent and infallible work of literature?

Very bold of you to assume I have opened the cover of this brand new item in Ms. Messenger's oeuvre (or that of Stellarlune, for that matter). As a responsible critic, I cannot give a review of the book itself - but I can give a readout of my immediate emotional response to the plot points I heard from various commentators as they went chapter-by-chapter reacting to the plot of the book.

In summary, my response is also perfectly described as: "a morbid sense of horror and disbelief." Thank you for putting my immediate reaction into words because I hadn't yet. I would compare the feeling of hearing what's going on in the series to seeing a train crash into another - you know it's going to happen and yet you can't help but be shocked as the trains violently crash into each other and become crushed and wrecked.

In the same way, given the foreshadowing planted in Legacy, I had a sneaking suspicion that Shannon was going to do something with her bizarre attempt to make Alvar pitiable and pathetic with the mysterious disease. In this book we got to see the decadently indolent, utterly flagrant, and completely shameless cashing-in on this with Alvar and Keefe being best friends in the Forbidden Cities as Keefe angsts about Sophie. Now note that Alvar was one of the people who kidnapped and tortured her in the first book (if we may harken back to a halcyon (and long-gone) age of good writing) and who betrayed them in Neverseen and committed various other crimes and reprehensible actions.

But to bring this up requires us to acknowledge the swarm of chickens flying home to roost in this whole plot point - that Keefe and Alvar are treated differently by Shannon and she has basically written them a blank moral and narrative check. Characters never acknowledge or denounce them for their immoral actions - just watch how Keefe was completely forgiven after betraying them in Neverseen and after cowardly running away in Unlocked (I mean - come on - at this point, put an ankle monitor on him) and faced no serious repercussions for this. Or how Alvar was given total absolution in Flashback and Fitz was treated as crazy or unreasonable for thinking a terrorist might - gasp - commit future terrorist actions and ought to be punished and/or locked away. And how Fitz is portrayed as particularly violent/dark for not. working overtime to save the life of his terrorist brother after stopping said brother from attacking people while a larger terrorist attack was taking place. Or that Fitz was treated as some psycho in Legacy for wanting to find Alvar and finally bring him to justice - and flipping out when Sophie and Keefe upstaged him, found Alvar, and threw away all of his work to find Alvar by letting Alvar go.

I mean. what do you expect at this point? The prospect that these characters are ever going to face consequences for their actions has been vehemently rejected again and again. At some point, true shock simply isn't possible. Just a morbid sense of disbelief and a feeling of bizarre unreality.

Will I read the rest of KOTLC in the future? Probably not. I have better things to read. I think I have grown beyond it. I do, however, enjoy hearing what has happened to it - in the capacity that I need resolution to this series and I must know how something I spent years of my life obsessing over ended (though with the current pace of this series I'm fearing it may never end). And the fandom is amazing and I am deeply loving the new memes out of these scenes:

*Alvar talking about how great it is that gay people exist and matchmaking doesn't in the forbidden cities*

Keefe: I know what you are

I suppose I didn't cover my reaction to the presence of more gay people. I liked that. It's nice to finally be represented in this series. I don't really talk about it anymore, but if you want a more thorough analysis of Keefe and of the series, I can't recommend @the-way-astray enough. They are very talented and I agree with nearly all of their conclusions.

As a final note, anon, you talk in a way that's really familiar and I can't help but ask - are you a past internet friend/mutual? I have some suspicions lol...

[toram-toram]

Do you have a father. Thats like. Actively in your life 😭

LMAAAAOOOOO

I CANT STOP LAUGHING OH MY GOD

THAT IS THE BEST QUESTION I HAVE EVER RECEIVED

YES ANON I DO HAVE DADDY ISSUES. A severe case of Daddy Issues even.

I have a dad but growing up he wasn't really there, and when he did, it was always a traumatic experience.

But nowadays we are good! I have forgiven him.

But we still rarely see each other. We live very far apart

So yeah. I'm extremely attracted towards old man. AND IF THATS A CRIME THEN LOCK ME UP OFFICER

Wait until you see my severe case of mommy issues

[hiroeghjj]

I’m terrible at English nor writing, so plz go easy on me on this one

Imagine that one scorpion’s invasion ending, but instead of Hanzo, it was Harumi who had to witness the Shirai ryu massacre, the death of her husband and son. She became Scorpion, and traveled through timelines to find one where her family enjoy a happy life, but that scenario never happens. Filled with rage, she exterminated timeline after timeline, until she was confronted by lord Liu Kang. Of course, a spectre is no match for a god, and she was forced to submit.

“ All I wanted is to see my son grow up, to grow old together with my husband, to observe my clan thrive to prosperity. Was that too much to ask?”

Hearing those words, a part inside Liu Kang felt pity for her, but she had committed countless crimes against humanity, and cannot be forgiven. Therefore, the god made an offer: he will guide Harumi to meet Hanzo, where he lives happily with his loved ones, but in returns, she will face the consequences of her actions, meaning she has to endure terrible punishments and be sealed away forever in Netheralm, a fate worse than death. She accepted the deal. After all, to see her lover lives in peace, it’s all she ever desires.

this is straight up dsmom, but I want Harumi not to be a forgotten npc, at least give her a personality or moments with her husband, and stop ruining Hanzo and Kuai characteristics. I demand justice for three of them

Sorry for the terrible writing btw 😔

[jewreallythinkthat]

You know I actually don't think we talk enough about the notions of irredeemability and mortification of the flesh which is so intrinsic to a lot of the left wing, especially (and I know people won't like this but it's true), ex-christian atheists, generally younger Millennials and Gen Z.

I first noticed it in fandom spaces, and it's become even more apparent since October 7th.

In fandom spaces, there is a belief that a character is either fully justified in their actions or completely irredeemable. Murder, assault, abuse is OK if it is directed at the deserving character. I've watched people justify characters being assaulted into heir own home and then accuse those calling out the abuse of being racist because the perpetrators was not white. The victim was not allowed any sympathy (objectively, also this person literally followed a request from their sister to not tell people where the sister was. That was the crime...) and the assault was justified by progressive members of the left because their personally had decided the crime was punishable by violence.

More recently, they have turned against queer characters, belittled the queer experience because nothing could ever make up for the behaviour of people decades ago in a much more homophobic world. It really is so very recent that people could be openly queer safely - laws protecting people's rights do not mean the people are safe and I think a lot of leftists seem to forget this. I, a queer man, made plenty of "gay jokes" at school to avoid being outed (like a lot of people who have come out since we left school) as an act of self preservation. I'm not proud of it but it was something that happened when I was a young teenager and I acknowledge that. According to a huge swathe of the left, I can never be forgiven for this, and I must spend the rest of my life repenting.

The revertion to these puritanical, medieval beliefs on sin - that we are never able to atone for mistakes of the past is a very, very, Christian notion which has permeated the left and is actively spread by a lot of people will push it in one breath and then decry everything Christianity has ever done in the next.

Since October 7ths, the Jews (they often say "Israelis" but it's so clear that they mean "Jews" - as shown by the number of times people accidentally say "Jew" and then try and correct themselves to "Zionists" or "Israelis") have become the ones who embody irredeemability. Nothing we do will be enough to make up for the sin of being Jewish. The left has become a whirlwind of conspiracy and (((they))) are at the centre of every single one.

I mentioned the mortification of the flesh before. There is an obsession in the left of self-flagellation. That because there is suffering in part of the world, then those in others parts must suffer as penitence. Israeli peace activists are only peaceful if they die in the pursuit of the destruction of Israel; peace activists fighting in Israel for Palestinian rights and the establishment of Palestine alongside Israel are not doing enough because committed the crime of being born in Israel and they must suffer to make up for it; people in "The West" are not allowed to have any enjoyment of anything until the suffering deemed most important by the Left has ceased.

Physical suffering, self-immolation, death in pursuit of The Cause has become the most pure one can be. This is identical to early Christians, it's just that The Cause is no longer Jesus but is Palestine (at the moment). Forgoing your own needs will not help end the war but people will do it to demonstrate their commitment rather than putting in the effort to push for sustainable and feesable solutions.

The strands of puritan Christianity that are twisted into the social justice of The Left are many, and people do not like to think or acknowledge them because that would imply Christianity has affected them, but heres the thing. If you live in any country which has been around a significant time and was, literally at ANY point a theocracy, then the beliefs of the religion that ruled the country will be infused into the culture there. That's not necessarily a bad thing, it's just how society evolves. Turning a blind eye to the influence of Christianity on countries like the US, UK, Canada, lot of Europe is willful ignorance and historical revisionism. The Left should be better than this but instead, it has decided that we are born into the sin of the crimes of the country we were born in and must atone for them for the rest of time, but anything other than physical suffering and death will never be enough.