#“Will I ever be forgiven for the crime of my life?

[architectpoet]

If I follow the starlight and call your name

Will I see you again on the astral plane?

Why did learnin' the truth make me feel worse?

Tell me, how does a man change the universe?

The Balancer’s Eye - Lord Huron

[chaoticamalgamation]

I've come to the realization that being put into catholicism at a young age really fucked me up in so many ways, but especially in the way that I view both sex and my own body as a taboo subject

if I ever looked at myself in the mirror when I was younger, and even now to this day, I would feel like I was bearing witness to something I should not look at for too long, even though it was my own body

and honestly, that's how I came away with such a lot of trauma, always finding ways to censor myself or to feel shameful about things that are inherently human. I had nothing to be embarrassed about, I was a literal child. children, by large, are just large little human sponges that soak up whatever information you give them, so they can't do anything sinful unless that is what you inform them of. it's like God in the garden if eden, if he'd have never told the two that the tree was forbidden to eat from, they would have never committed the great atrocity because there would have been nothing atrocious in indulging in a garden you were told was yours.

[kabsey]

Why am I suddenly obsessed with the idea of a forgiven Illario being gravely wounded in the last battle?

Like he stumbles his way back to where the Crows have gathered, covered in blood and grime and gore, and he wants to cry with relief when Teia rushes to his side. She has to hold up almost all of his weight as she leads him to one of the few empty cots left in their field hospital. And then she leaves him and he wants to cry again, near delirious with pain and blood loss and an all-consuming dread that his end is waiting, just out of sight, to swallow him whole.

The minutes trickle by, and as he lies there, surrounded by the moans of the other dying and gasping for breath that can barely squeeze through the agony, he starts to think that maybe this was how it was always meant to happen. That maybe he was destined to die alone and unmourned, just another body on a mass pyre. When he begins to fade in and out of consciousness, he's grateful because he's no longer aware of every second counting down until his last.

In one brief flicker, he hears voices above him, muffled and far away as if he's underwater.

"—wasn't like this when I left him, I swear, Lucanis."

"Get a healer. Now."

-------

In the next, he's fairly sure he's still dreaming because he's wrapped in a blanket and curled in a wheelbarrow of all things being pushed by a qunari of all people.

-------

When he wakes again, he barely notices because the room he's in is so dark. He's lying on a soft bed, and a black silhouette watches him from the shadows just outside the circle of banked firelight.

"Lucanis?" he croaks. Every inch of his skin feels soaked through with cold sweat, but his throat is so, so dry.

The silhouette leans forward to reveal a pointed beard and a pointed gaze that had always seemed to accuse him, even before he had committed any of his crimes.

Illario sighs, too tired now to feel the panic of before. "Here to... finish me off?"

He's already drifting when Viago answers.

"If I were here to kill you, you wouldn't have woken up."

-------

The next time he opens his eyes, pale grey light fills the room, filtered through gauzy curtains. Both he and the world feel more solid. He's not in his own suite in the villa but a smaller room in the guest wing. And the man sitting at his bedside is, as ever, the person he most and least wants to see in the world.

"You're going to live," Lucanis states, and his voice and his expression hold no clue as to how he feels about that.

A huff of wry laughter escapes Illario. "My apologies."

That prompts the tiniest of furrows in his cousin's brow. "Why were you there? No one expected you." The furrow deepens. "Were you even fighting for our side?"

The jibe should sting, but Illario feels as if all of the aches and weariness from every moment of his life have settled deep into his bones. "I killed Venatori. Even a few darkspawn."

"So you betrayed your allies again?" Lucanis sighs. His exhaustion is clear in the slump of his shoulders and the circles beneath his eyes.

"The Venatori were never my allies."

Lucanis straightens at that, showing a little of the fire that Illario had always wished he would. "You were going to let them into Trevsio."

"I wasn't going to let them stay. After they pushed out the Antaam and protected us from the gods, we could have gotten rid of them."

"And the blood magic?" Lucanis accused.

"I needed to be able to defend myself."

"From me?" his cousin demanded, a spark of violet flickering in his eyes. "Or your Venatori lover?"

Illario lets his eyes fall closed. "She was just a tool. They were all just tools."

"That's all you see, isn't it? You look at the world, and instead of people, you see only tools to be used."

"Of course," Illario agrees. He opens his eyes and almost laughs to see the look of surprise on Lucanis's face. "Just as we were taught, no? Even we were only tools to Caterina."

He settles deeper into the pillows, the pull of sleep tugging his eyelids down again. "But maybe being the favorite tool was almost like being human."

For a few long moments, only the crackling in the fireplace answers him. He expects to hear the creak of the chair and Lucanis's fading footsteps at any moment.

Instead he hears a quiet murmur. "It wasn't."

The low tone is a hook in Illario's heart. Even decades later, he can hear the echoes of shared secrets in the nights after hard days, when he would sneak into Lucanis's room and curl up on his floor so they could commiserate in their mutual misery. He struggles to breathe around the tears that prick his eyelids and tighten his throat, the effort just as wrenching as trying to breathe through the pain of his wound.

And he thinks then that he has not learned his lesson, that maybe he will never learn his lesson. Because if some power alighted in that room and promised to send him back to those years, even if it meant that Thedas would suffer blight and war and demons and elvhen gods all over again with no guarantee of a repeated victory...

He wouldn't hesitate for a moment.

[outtamynoggin]

The Gymanstics Kids from Nightwing 1996 Issue #126: “Payback”

Dick Grayson had dealt with a lot things in his life: crime bosses, metahuman threats, alien invasions - so many. He’d fought against assassins and warlords, juggled hero work with civilian duties, lead an entire generation of crimefighters, and somehow still managed to stay on his feet despite getting barely 3 hours of sleep per night. His greatest achievement? He’d even survived being raised by Bruce Wayne. He turned out alright!

But nothing - and he meant nothing - had prepared him for this.

“Coach Grayson!”

Dick barely had time to react before a body slammed into his, arms wrapping tightly around his torso in an iron grip. Years of training were the only thing that kept him from toppling over. He instinctively braced himself and refrained from Judo flipping the thing that collided into him, instead looking down to see a face that was somewhat familiar...

“...Alex?” His voice came out in disbelief. Wait, was this the little teen he'd taught when he was working at the gymnastics gym 10 years ago?

“Teach!”

He pried himself free from the boy-man-Alex(?)'s-clingy grip just in time to catch sight of the rest of them. 7 men and women. Each and every one of them. He was staring at a lineup of old memories. And little terrors.

10 years ago, when he was still settling into himself in Bludhaven, Dick had taken a part-time coaching job for the gymnastics team thinking it would be a relatively low-stress gig. He could pass on his experience, brush up his skills, have fun teaching some kids, and, for once, avoid getting shot at (unlike his previous job where it had practically been a job requirement). That had been the plan.

A simple plan.

Now, all of his past decisions came back to haunt him.

There they stood. His old students from his time coaching in Bludhaven’s gymnastics club years ago. The very same students he had fondly trained when he was still trying to balance being Nightwing and holding down a ‘normal’ job. Each and every one of them was now standing in front of him, dressed in Team USA’s official leotards and tracksuits, grinning like wolves.

This was bad.

“You didn’t tell us you were coming back, Teach,” Reina, the one he had once nicknamed ‘Menace’ (affectionately), pouted. Her piercing green eyes gleamed with something that made the hairs on the back of Dick’s neck stand up.

“I wasn’t exactly expecting to see you guys here,” he admitted. “At the same time. In one place. In my apartment building.”

“We’re national-level now,” Alex said proudly, ignoring his last words and still bouncing on his heels like an overexcited puppy. His blonde hair only added to the image of his being a golden retriever puppy. “Thanks to you.”

“That’s… great,” Dick managed, already mentally preparing his exit strategy.

“Oh, don’t think you’re getting away,” Reina cut in smoothly. “We missed you, Teach. And you left without saying goodbye.”

Layla nodded, the black braids in her ponytail swinging with every moment. "We were so sad. It's almost like you didn't want to spend the time we wanted to with you.”

Dick tensed. He did not like the way she said that. It sounded like an accusation, which was technically fair. He had left rather abruptly when his Nightwing duties had gotten in the way. But in his defense, he had not expected all of them to become Olympic-tier gymnasts and then hunt him down like a pride of lions who had finally found their lost cub.

“It wasn’t personal,” he tried. “I had… other responsibilities.”

“We know,” Kai, an ever-smiling boy replied sweetly. Only this time, his smile didn't have the same heart-warming quality as it had 10 years ago. “That doesn’t mean we’ve forgiven you.”

“Oh, boy.”

And then they descended.

Kai hooked an arm around his neck, dragging him into a headlock while Reina pinched his side in a way that made him twitch. More joined in—Sora, the quiet one, was suddenly behind him, tugging at his jacket like a child with a toy they refused to let go. Caleb, the one he distinctly remembered having difficulties with anger when he was younger, pulled the grocery bags from his hands with a smile and with a sharp jab of his leg, broke the handle on the door, slowly letting it swing open on its own. He then stepped to the side and waited politely, all the while still smiling.

Dick felt a shiver running down his spine. What's a house? Who needs their old things, huh?

Forget it, it's time to start new anyway. Dick turned around at once.

Tomoe, who had once been his shyest student, smirked as she executed a perfect flip over his head, landing gracefully in front of him just to block any potential escape route.

“We have so much to catch up on, Coach,” she said with a smile that was anything but innocent.

Dick took a slow breath. He had fought crime lords, outmaneuvered Slade Wilson, and stared down the barrel of countless guns. And yet, looking at the familiar, determined faces of his old students, all united in their goal to reclaim their beloved ‘Teach,’ he felt something he hadn’t felt in years.

True, unfiltered fear.

He was so, so screwed.

[theheirofthesharingan]

The way everything Itachi does and says gets twisted to make him look despicable will always be hysterical.

Itachi: I committed a crime by annihilating my clan. I deserve to be punished. This is why I pushed Sasuke towards the path of hatred, so he could hate me enough to kill the person who committed such a severe crime.

Fandom: Itachi planned his own suicide as a way to escape punishment. What a selfish bastard.

the same people: He doesn't get enough hate.

the same people: He doesn't get punished for his crimes. He deserved the worst.

Itachi: Only I deserve to be blamed for the massacre. Only I'm responsible for the mess.

Fandom: Why doesn't he take the responsibility? He got away so easily.

the same people: He's justifying Konoha. Konoha bootlicker. He should take the full responsibility and also blame everyone.

the same people: But don't blame his parents and the clan though. They CLEARLY did not use him for their own gains. They were only the victims. :(

Itachi: I don't deserve to be forgiven for what I did to Sasuke. He doesn't have to forgive me. As a result, I cannot allow myself to show him much affection because I'm not worthy of it. He should be around people who love him and haven't hurt him like I did.

Fandom: He showed Sasuke SOME affection. He manipulated Sasuke and turned him into a Konoha bootlicker too.

the same people: Itachi was so cruel before his goodbye. Why couldn't he show Sasuke MORE affection?

the same people: Itachi wanted Naruto to manipulate Sasuke and have him do what Itachi thought was right.

Itachi: I have felt nothing but guilt and regret for my deeds my whole life.

Fandom: So what? Why is he acting in accordance with that guilt? Why is his behavior not a perfect reflection of what I want him to do?

the same people: He himself says he had no regrets before his death. No mistranslation spotted there. To defend my favorites, though? I'll make sure to use the best sources to justify them. Not Itachi. No mistranslation in manga can ever exist.

The hypocrisy in this fandom is boundless.

[thorns-and-berries]

Will I ever be forgiven for the crime of my life?

Will it haunt me 'til I die?

To the end of time

The Balancer’s Eye - Lord Huron

[enby-axels]

probably my most unpopular mdzs opinion ever is that lan wangji is trauma bonded to lan xichen. and i mean that in the truest sense of the term in which a victim feels emotionally attached to their abuser, not referring to the distorted, pop psychology definition of two people bonding because they experience trauma together.

i know people wont like this because they cling to the idea of lan xichen being made of idk sunshine and sparkles. but you can be a superficially nice person and also enable horrific violence; this is literally one of the main points mdzs is making about his character. similarly, you can love someone and want what [you think] is best for them, but also harm and, yes, abuse them. this too is true of lan xichen, who — in his position as his clan's leader — punished lan wangji nearly to death for the crime of protecting the love of his life, who himself was just trying to protect war refugees from collective punishment. and then let his clan participate in the murder of said refugees and also the love of his brother's life. (yall: lwj injured 33 of his clan's seniors! me: and who put him in that position. why were they following him in the first place. do you seriously think he would raise his sword against his own clan unless he had no choice)

and like you can make up a million excuses for lan xichen, tell yourself it wasnt that bad or that it cant possibly qualify as abuse even though there's an established power imbalance and a violent exploitation of said power imbalance which lan wangji is in no position to defy, even by the end of the novel. and im sure lan xichen himself made similar excuses to himself to justify his actions so he could sleep at night, but the fact of the matter is that mdzs the novel is naaawwwwt condoning his actions. there's a clear perpetrator of violence here, and also a clear victim

all this to say that lan wangji's relationship with his clan and his direct blood relations is much more complex than popular interpretations acknowledge. as if this isnt clear enough from him being the second jade, the spare to his brother the heir, the politically less important brother who was sent to the wen indoctrination while his older brother fled, the secondborn son whose truths are repeatedly subordinated to his clan leader's lies. twin jades of lan is an ironic title, in the same way twin heroes of yunmeng is ironic. theyre not twin anythings. they were never equals, in moral character or political power

so yeah, lan wangji does love and has probably even forgiven his brother. but what other choice does he have?

[wolfwafflez]

Can I please.

Talk a little bit.

About...STELLA.

Or rather, Stella DEFENDERS. And how much they PISS. ME. OFF.

Now, before anyone's hackles get all raised, I wanna say. I like that Stella exists, in the story. I don't like HER, but she's an important character and it's good she's there.

HOWEVER.

You've probably seen how many so called fans absolutely loathe Viv over her characterization of Stella alone. I've seen people call her SEXIST over this, for fuck's sake. As if Stella is the first character ever of her kind. As if having such a female character is a COMPLETELY new concept, and a CRIME that Viv should never be forgiven for.

As if we needed another reminder that people are not familiar with media literacy at all. In the slightest.

Long story short, I got into an argument with someone who claimed that Viv "sucks at writing" because of how she did Stella. I asked them to elaborate. They went on to say that Stella's character is weak because she "is the way she is for no reason." They find the way she's written problematic, and in poor taste, because she was just meant to be a trophy wife for Stolas. She has no title (we don't know that) or powers of her own in the Goetia and was just married off to produce an egg. I in turn, said, "...yeah. That's called royalty. That was the life of most women born into royal hierarchy, title or not, for a very long time. And yes, most of the time it did turn them into bitter, nasty individuals. If you want a reason for why she is the way she is, then...I mean, it's not hard to understand." Of course, me saying it's not hard to understand is assuming someone has basic media literacy, and I guess that's my bad.

I also pointed out to this person, who kept saying Viv has made Stella a horrible manipulative harpy for no reason, that they speak as if Helluva Boss is over. It's clearly not. And Viv has said we will get Stella's backstory before too long. If they were making these kind of claims using Stella's WHOLE story, then I would have taken them more seriously, but as it is, it sounded like they just wanted to complain because Viv isn't writing Stella the way they think that she should. That's really what it pretty much always comes down to, isn't it? This whole thing started because someone else said, wouldn't it be nice if Stella was a NICE character instead? Why can't she just be NICE? Why can't she be sweet and fun and a good, supportive friend to Stolas? Why do they have to be enemies and blah blah blah blah.

Because stories need conflict, that's why. Because a lot of people really sympathize with Stella and I don't understand why?! Just because she's written as a mean woman?! It's almost like they don't remember, or don't even KNOW, that mean women exist in real life. Mean, nasty, horrible, manipulative women. A LOT of them. And they didn't have to be raised in a royal hierarchy and sold off into arranged marriage to be so. Viv is not sexist just because of Stella. She also does not "suck at writing" for having a character of this nature. I told this person as such and they said they still had a right to criticize her. It's like, of course you do. However, just saying someone "sucks" at something is not criticism, and just because you don't like the way someone is doing something in their story (especially if they haven't revealed the full thing), doesn't make it weak or problematic.

[lacunammmm]

I love Dabi/Touya but honestly your post about him had me nodding my head in agreement 😭 but hey Dabi had to be a disaster to someone because let's face it - at best he was a small thorn in his abusers path of "redemption" because well it's not like anyone even gave a shit about Enji being an abuser, the civilians were just pissed he did a poor job at stopping Shigaraki in the first war and about Dabi's kills but they don't give two shits about him being a domestic abuser, all the "heroes" don't give two hoots about it either because he cried a lil, changed and is good at his job 😒 like literally has his sidekicks still beside him and hawks is his little cheerleader and well hey he's apparently going to be "atoning" for the rest of his life but hey that falls flat when we learn kids STILL want to be like him in the future!

Real talk. Imagine a universe where Overhaul is a hero and was found to be experimenting on Eri. Let's say a young Kai Chisaki was found by All Might and raised as his son, but then All Might getting hurt by AFO drove him a bit mad. He heals All Might but gets obsessed about "solving" crime by removing people's powers and putting the tools in the hands of heroes to take quirks from villains at will. During a raid on a yakuza base, he finds Eri and The Boss' notes about her power, and he gets some ideas. He takes the kid in as his foster daughter and then her life becomes hell. To the people, he's a famous hero scientist and healer. But behind closed doors, he's an abuser.

The guy could have just done an apology and they'd have forgiven him. "Sorry, I needed to torture that girl because quirk erasing bullets would ensure a society of JUSTICE! But I realize now what I did was wrong and I'm trying to atone." Imagine if this also got leaked during the first war arc, so we've got Endeavor, Hawks and Overhaul all addressing the crowd's complaints at the press conference. But then the only thing people ask Overhaul is "Will you continue to use your quirk to heal us?" And "Will you fix the roads and the damaged buildings using your power?" And he says yes, and they're appeased. None of the good guy characters have an issue with what he did, suddenly, even if they really should. Oh, but it's fine because Eri forgave him, right? An extreme example, but given how no one even thought twice about forgiving Aoyama when he got outed as the traitor and the characters don't even discuss the controversy with Hawks and Endeavor's actions? We had what, a brief conversation when Tokoyami rescued Hawks where Tokoyami told him he did the right thing? And nothing else. The good guys just don't engage if another good guy does something morally dubious. I believe this is entirely on brand for this series. It was pure plot armor and dumb luck that no one ever died as a result of Aoyama leaking information. Imagine if Moonfish had successfully skewered Shoji's heart and then ate him. Imagine if Mustard had gunned down both Kendo and Tetsutetsu and they died from their injuries. What about if the League successfully kidnapped both Bakugo and Tokoyami, but Shigaraki decided he only wanted Bakugo, so he films himself turning Tokoyami to dust so he can send the video to the heroes and news stations to highlight their failures to protect kids? That was entirely outside of Aoyama's control but his classmates didn't care that they all only continue to exist because the villains were thankfully too incompetent to kill them. The crimes of heroes just don't matter. These people allegedly enforce the law but only when a villain is the one doing the law breaking. Heroes are allowed to make mistakes and get forgiven.

[piratefishmama]

Forgiven not Forgotten | Part 5

Two years.

Two whole years in that void.

Two years of his life. Gone. And he remembered none of it.

He didn’t even have time to ask questions either, because the moment the words “what happened?” left his lips, someone was pushing to get into the room.

“Everyone not involved with the Hawkins incident, I want you out of this room immediately.” A badge was flashed before the officials could argue, and a woman, unfamiliar to Eddie, but clearly having been through the ringer herself missing an arm and sporting one hell of a scar over the left side of her face, pushed her way through. “That means you officers, out.”

They didn’t argue, both leaving without question. Government.

“Stinson?” Steve was the first to identify her, while the others just looked on in surprise “you’re alive? Is Owens—”

“Despite the real effort those things put in to make it otherwise, yes. I’m here. Owens is permanently wheelchair bound but he’s okay. Mr and Mrs Harrington” She nodded to the two in the back, Steve’s parents holy shit. Okay. “I’ll allow you to stay on account of the fact that I don’t know what you’ve been told already. Mr Thompson, I thank you for your attendance however the government will take over from here. You’re not needed.” ‘Harold’ took one look at the Harringtons, then another to the men waiting outside the door, and chose wisely.

“Sorry John, government. I’m way over my head here.” He uttered, before making his quiet exit.

“I’m never hiring him again.” John sighed with a roll of his eyes, while Lynda stared Stinson down with an air of contempt.

“As if you could make us lea—"

“I’m the government, Mrs Harrington, I absolutely could have you removed. Now—” she turned back to the kids “I’ve already spoken with Hopper and the others, this… this issue is more important than their involvement. I know you don’t want to sign them, I know you have every right to tell the government to go fuck itself, I would too in your situation.” She rummaged through her bag, it took a little more effort than it would have normally given the missing other arm, but she made do, producing a folder from within. She placed it on the bed and opened it. A stack of NDA’s. “The government are prepared to clear Mr. Munson’s name, completely, without it ever going to trial, we have a number of names to take the fall for it, all perfectly believable with fabricated eye witnesses, but they only do this, if these are signed.”

“Are you blackmailin—” John spoke up, only to be cut off by the woman with a stern glare.

“Yes. Yes I am. I would rather not be. Listen, they will throw Mr. Munson under the bus, without hesitation, he’s the easiest person to pin this on as the story is already out there and people already believe it. You want their help, it needs to be a two way street. They are prepared to completely clear Munson’s name, and pin the crimes on someone else, they are prepared to create false witnesses, they’re even offering money. What you know is worth millions, and they will pay it to keep you quiet, but if you do not sign these… the second he’s cleared for release, he goes to jail for the murders of Chrissy Cunningham, Fred Benson, Patrick McKinney, and the attempted murder of Maxine Mayfield. You sign them, he leaves with you, a free man. His name will be publicly cleared by the days end. We’ll even make a hero out of him.”

“He is a hero” Dustin argued, a frown on his face.

“Exactly, I agree. The public don’t though. They will when we’re done with them. We need you to sign these” She looked at the Harringtons. “All of you. I’ll leave you with these and wait outside, call me back in when you’ve made your decision.” And with that, she walked out unhindered, leaving them all struck silent.

Until Steve moved. He grabbed the folder first, picking up the pen.

“Steve” Eddie started before anyone else could.

“You’re not going to jail, Eddie. I don’t give a fuck. It’s one piece of paper to sign and honestly who’d believe us if we told anyone anyway? Monsters running or flying through town killing people? Evil vines putting slugs in dead people, spores that kill shit, toxic air? Other dimensions? We’d be called insane, they’d probably class it as a mass hallucination from a gas leak or some shit, they’d put us all in the looney bin the second we opened our mouths. They’re offering to clear your name, and all we have to do is sign some stupid piece of paper. So I’m signing it.”

It was signed before anyone could stop him. And being legally an adult, it was binding. He passed the folder to Dustin, who while not legally an adult, signed it anyway. Then, both young men turned to the adults.

“Steven…”

“Sign it. Sign it and he’s cleared. These people don’t mess around, mom. No doubt the others have already signed. I get you don’t think it’s right, really I do, but—”

“Give it here, son.” John stepped forward and took the offered folder and pen, and was about to sign on the dotted line when—

“Good heavens, at least read it, John” Lynda took the folder from him, eyes on the document, skimming the lines on the page for anything that could fuck them over. “…Oh, give me the damn pen” she took that too, quickly scribbling her signature on her own before passing it back to her husband to sign. “The nerve of these people. This is blatant blackmail. Did he even—was he ever even guilty? Of anything?”

“No, he wasn’t. Unfortunate case of wrong place wrong time… twice. As unbelievable as that is.” Steve sighed, a huge feeling of relief washing over him. Eddie would be okay. He wasn’t dead, he wasn’t going to jail, he’d be fine. This incredibly stupid boy would be okay. “He’ll need a place to stay, Wayne’s—"

Eddie was sat up in an instant, his body complaining but he ignored it “Where’s Wayne? Is he okay? Is he safe? Is he—"

“Whoa whoa, big guy,” Dustin was quick to his side, a hand on his shoulder to steady him as that heart monitor went wild “calm down, Wayne’s okay, he got out before the barricades went up. We don’t know exactly where he went, but we’ll find him, okay? It just might take a bit of time.”

“In the meantime, he can stay with us.” All three sets of eyes turned to John Harrington as he closed the folder, holding it in one hand, Lynda smiling beside him, apparently content with the idea “Our current house only has two bedrooms, but we’ll make do until we can arrange to purchase something larger. I assume Miss Buckley will be staying too until we can find her parents. It’ll be a full house, might be a bit cramped, but we’ll manage. I’ve been stuck in stuffy boardrooms with more people for hours on end, and we hated each other. It’ll be okay.”

“I… dunno, is that—” Steve hesitated, of course Steve hesitated, Eddie didn’t blame him, they barely knew each other. Sure they had shared trauma but that didn’t really mean much between complete strangers. “I mean—” Steve looked at him “will you be comfortable? Staying with… with me?” and wasn’t that just the weirdest question Steve could have asked him.

“Dude… shouldn’t I be asking you that? I’m the freak here, why wouldn’t I be—sure! I’m fine with that, I mean, stranger things have happened, right?”

“Heh, right… if—if you’re sure it won’t make you uncomfortable or anything…”

“A jester in a palace, hanging out with a king, my my, how in the world could I be uncomfortable with that?” He smiled, wide, teasing, his cheeks dimpled as Steve rolled his eyes with obvious fondness.

Lynda grabbed her husbands’ arm subtly, taking his attention just long enough for her to utter the word “Dimples” at him while Dustin kept the others attention with his complaining about Steve getting to stay with Eddie. Steve immediately firing back with the fact that Dustin was staying too until they could find Claudia and not to be dumb.

He looked down at her with a small frown, then back at Eddie, realisation dawning on him just as quickly as it did his wife.

“Dimples.”

Part 7

[prinzrupprecht]

To Live or Die

Chapter 5 - the truth and acceptance

I’m back to my next level of Okita stage coping since the leaks. If you’re new here, read the previous parts! Click on synopsis and see all the chapters linked.

Synopsis

TW: hurt/comfort

WC: 965

Kondo-san and your uncle were in another room talking. You assumed they were practically catching up over the years. Souji was quiet like you were. Were you both waiting for the other to break the silence? You sighed while deciding that Souji won this game with the awkward tension. “It’s been a while…” you mumbled while keeping your head down.

You couldn’t even make eye contact with him. He was just as shy and nervous as you were. “How have you been?” he asked. It was better to change the subject for the better. His question made you think after the war you didn’t honestly expect to see him again. His words struck you before how he wanted to help his friends in battle fighting for their lives and beliefs. Souji said if he were to die then it would be in a spectacular battle. What changed?

“I’m… doing okay. What about you?” You had no idea whether you were telling the truth. Were you okay? Probably not. Your heart started fluttering again. You casually brought one of your fingers up to your cheekbone while awkwardly smiling. You tilted your head a bit to get a good look at him.

“I told you already with the letter I sent.” He muttered as if he was more disappointed with your response. You looked down and thought for a moment what he said. Was he hinting how he missed you?

“Sorry, I’m not great with words.” You muttered and it was silent for a good minute between you two. You didn’t really give him much about your new life in your letter. You wanted to ask him things as he did but neither of you knew how to talk to one another properly like before. Were things completely ruined between you two?

“Are you still mad at me?” he gripped the top of his knees unsure if what he did would ever be forgivable to you.

“To you? No. I am with myself. You shouldn’t apologize when I can’t even properly give you one.” Your words affected him when he knew you all too well. You still somewhat resented him for leaving and choosing to fight in a war that wasn’t winnable. What did you mean by that? He has already long forgiven the things you said.

You were closing yourself off from people getting close to you again. “No. I can’t ever make up for the past. I don’t regret choosing my beliefs and keeping my promises to the others, and Kondo-san. I still always cared about you, it was just the wrong place at the wrong time for both of us.” Okita realized what he was saying would hurt you, but he couldn’t lie either.

You kept silent and pursued your lips from getting emotional. “But— but we’re here now right?” Okita saw how saddened you were. You tried to crack a smile at his enthusiasm.

“Ya… I suppose,” you quietly said. Kondo-san and your uncle returned laughing with one another. You and Souji looked at them wondering what they talked about.

“What is going on?” you had asked and your uncle looked at Kondo.

“I think you should go back with them,” your uncle broke the tension in the room. You stared at him with confusion.

“Huh?” You were wondering why. You looked at Okita who didn’t make eye contact with you.

“I don’t… understand?” This was difficult for Arashi to explain to you how the area is consumed with illegal gangs and former members of Tosa have migrated down to Yokohama to operate their crimes in the dark.

“You’re just not safe here, if you can at least give them a chance… you’ll find that closure but it won’t be here. I know things have been hard for you.” He stopped and saw you looking down at your hands. Kondo stood back in silence while he was relatively glad you weren’t resisting the temptation to stay in Yokohama.

“What about you?” you asked. Your uncle sucked in a breath before looking at Kondo.

“After you got attacked earlier, that man knows your face and the gang he associates with… it’s too dangerous for you to stay here.” He avoided your question and it was difficult for you to decide.

You wanted some time to decide whether you would risk your life staying in Yokohama or go back with Kondo and Souji. “You didn’t answer my question.” You chewed the inside of your cheek.

“I’ll— I’ll be fine, I promise. Your life is more in jeopardy than mine. I run the docks down here, they won’t come for me.” Arashi ruffled your hair a bit making you pout. You had no idea if he was telling you the truth or just making the situation sound less bad than what it already was.

“If anything we’ll come back if Arashi-san is in trouble, right Kondo-san?” Souji spoke up. You crossed your arms but thought of it as him trying to get you to leave but maybe he was right and that your life is in danger now. Who would be better to keep you safe? The obvious answer would be Kondo and Souji.

“Fine, when do we leave?” You looked at Kondo and back to Souji.

“Soon, I have to get back to the department in a day or so since I’m here without proper clearance.” You briefly looked at your uncle and excused yourself to grab a few of your things.

How did things have to turn out this way? Now you’re returning to live with them again like old times? It feels incredibly odd and not real. The war took that from you, right? You were hurt still but maybe over time you’ll heal again and move on. Only time can do that.

Proceed to the next part

➤ Chapter 6

[firequakerr]

Alrighty strap tf in . I lost my old account so I'm posting this here too. Ignore grammar I ain't worrying about that

In my opinion,Javert is one of the most complex, well written characters to ever exist. For some reason, most people believe that Javert is the antagonist of the book “les miserables”, however; I completely disagree. I think he was an honest man, a victim of the law just like Jean Val jean. Starting with the musical, first and foremost the lyric “I’ll escape now from this world from the world of jean valjean” which means that he finally realized he was chasing an innocent man solely because he thought he was doing “god” had assigned him to do . That he was being loyal to a country he loved so dearly and if you think about it, In the end the law did win. Another lyric to further prove my point “canthis man be believed ? Shall his sins be forgiven? Shall his crimes be reprieved?”its growing more and more evident that Javert is starting to truly realize Valjean’s innocence , he’s beginning to doubt just how righteous the system he’d built his very life upon. This is further proven by yet another lyric “and must I now begin to doubt, who never doubted all these years”. Another thing I love about javert is how he is truly just a copy of Jean. They are two sides of the same coin, the humanitarian and the human in his rawest form. This is proven yet again in the musical as both Val Jean’s soliloquy and Javert’s suicide are the exact same song, not just in melody, but also in emotion. Both tell a story ridden with anger and regret; however, whilst Jean speaks of new beginnings, rebirth. Javert , on the other hand, speaks of the end, a flame that once burnt so bright now extinguished with no chance of re-ignition. In the movie, as god awful as is Javert gives Gavroche his medal, pinning it on his dead body. It was painfully obvious to anyone who bothered to analyze Javert’s body language that in the very moment he truly realized just how messed up the entire revolution was. He deemed the child that died in an attempt to make living in France as a non-aristocrat possible. In a world Where the poor are left to scavenge through filth and lick their own wounds in private; whilst the high and mighty had their entire existence handed to them on a silver platter. He knew that child was braver than he had ever been. However; I believe that seeing valjean carry a wounded marius , a boy no older than 18,through the filthy sewers was what finally broke his resolve . At that moment guilt consumed his very being it seeped out of his pores and clutched his soul like a vice . He saw suicide as the only way to cleanse his soul of all the “sins” he’d committed. That perhaps if he died then the lord may accept his soul, cleanse his being of said guilt, he viewed himself as a martyr.

In the book, he believed that no righteous man could sin. He believed the nun that hid Jean Valjean without a second thought since he believed they were incapable of lying. Want proof that he cared for the innocent to a certain degree? He didn't think to capture Valjean after his supposed "death" since he was worried he'd be framing another innocent man, just like he did during that court meeting. That's sadly all I can say about the brick. I'll update y'all when I finish it again

[switch347]

Touhou Project x Panel de Pon Bios (Wave 1)

Sometime has passed since my first 3 commission to @dreamysuite. Now I'm going to make some lore for these commissions, because reasons.

Blossoming Barrier (Lip and Reimu)

If I were to tell you that Lip and Reimu are really good friends, you'd be forgiven for being shocked at the very idea. After all, they have differing personalities, and even Reimu herself thought that this tomboyish fairy would be nothing more than a nuisance, due to how Gensokyo-native fairies tend to act.

However, despite ALL of these factors, the two, in fact, are on very good terms with each other. Even after all of her time in Gensokyo, this strange and mysterious land never stops surprising Lip; it confuses the flower fairy just as much as it amazes her! As such, she looks up to Reimu as a mentor of sorts, often looking to her for guidance, which Reimu will usually supply, even if she finds doing so annoying at times.

Between often going out of her way to help Lip when she needs it and letting her hang around the shrine, some of Reimu's associates tend to joke about Lip being the shrine maiden's little sister. Even her best friend, Marisa, likes to get in on the fun. While Reimu insists that this is not true, it does feel like she's slowly starting to feel this way about Popples' future queen...

Breezing News (Windy and Aya)

Aya Shameimaru is a rather infamous figure in Gensokyo. She runs the Bunbunmaru Newspaper and is notorious for exaggerating her stories and even outright lying. Suffice it to say, most who know her find her very, very annoying. So when Windy came into her life, she seemed to finally get a taste of what everyone thinks of her.

This playful wind fairy is known for her affinity with birds, and it just so happens that Aya is a Crow Tengu. As such, Windy seems to take a shine to her. Or it could be because she finds Aya funny. I kid you not, that's what she said about her.

And in a shocking turn of events, Windy actually manages to run the crow tengu ragged! She's constantly following Aya around, pestering her, and on top of that, she's always calling the crow tengu "Chirpie!" Plus, despite Youkai Mountain being serious about keeping outsiders off the mountain and even going as far as to kill any intruders, for some reason, Windy seems to be able to easily get past their security EVERY. SINGLE. TIME! Eventually, Aya gave up on trying to lose this playful wind fairy and just let her hang around while she works on her stories.

One time, Aya did try sending the wind fairy off with her camera to look for a scoop, just so she could stop bothering her. Windy used up all the film taking pictures of birds, and Aya has never let Windy touch her camera again ever since.

Freezing Mischief (Sherbet and Cirno)

Sherbet is an ice fairy. Cirno is also an ice fairy. It's almost as if fate itself dictated that these two would cross paths (thanks (for nothing), Remilia).

Ever since her partner in crime, Windy, started hanging out (read: bothering) Aya, Sherbet has been more or less doing her own thing. She eventually met Cirno while hanging around Misty Lake (the former was planning on freezing the lake to use as her own personal rink, but the ensuing chaos made her forget all about that plan).

The relationship between these two ice fairies is... complicated, to say the least. One moment, they're working together to cause trouble for Gensokyo's populace; the next, they're getting at each other's throats over a snide remark Sherbet made towards Cirno. The snide remarks occur quite a bit due to of Cirno's mountain-sized ego.

Because they're both ice fairies, it's become something of a running joke to lump the two together. One would say, "The ice fairy is causing trouble again," to which another would usually respond with, "Which one?"

[tuliptiger]

The number of times I've rewatched Arcane is truly astounding. There is a new facet of each character I get through every time, it's such a show that rewards you when you take another look at it.

It's really weird to me people are taking such harsh stances on Vi, Jinx (specifically not Powder) and Caitlyn. People's opinions are their own full stop but I think all of these extreme views of these characters could be changed by just watching the show again?

Caitlyn -

At the end we get an entire scene dedicated to both Jinx and Caitlyn saying PLAINLY, where we rarely get obvious, that they do Not hate each other anymore. They've grown, they've empathized, they've moved on. Forgiven? Debatable but they have for sure moved past hating.

My interpretation of what Jinx said, about blowing the building up with Caitlyn's mom, wasn't ever intended to be an apology. I think it was to reply to what Caitlyn said, Jinx was saying I don't hate you either, I wouldn't have changed my actions but it wasn't personal to you and I don't hate you personally. She definitely still killed her mom, but it wasn't because of anything Caitlyn did and it wasn't personal.

Has anyone considered Caitlyn's feelings on that entire situation too if we follow that lens of the jail scene? She definitely blamed herself in some way for her moms death. Either for her hesitation in not killing Jinx, which she's stated, or she may have even felt that Jinx took her hatred of Caitlyn out on her mother directy. With Jinx's words in the jail scene, Caitlyn can walk away knowing that it wasn't anything she did to influence or cause her mom's death, Jinx was going to do it anyway and she literally could have had no way of knowing that.

Are they besties and love each other and want to be in each other's space more than they maybe have to be? That's up to peoples interpretation on that one because we don't really get any canon for that to go on. I'd say based on everything that is Caitlyn, she'd try to be cordial and make nice awkwardly.

Caitlyn's character as a whole is so subtle compared to what media normally gives for any and all characters in general. It's in the details, it's in the subtleness of facial expressions and eyes, and it's absolutely in all of the flown by one liners that have incredible story weight. The number of things I've personally missed in season 2 where they give us a huge explanation of what's going on, and it's in a montage and it's 3 words long. Caitlyn is IN those lines.

It's in her comparisons, it's in her parallels with JINX. And that's not even subtle or a stretch they're everywhere. What each scene and each parallel scene means... is harder to interpret for me honestly but I can see it and recognize it all the same. Caitlyn is such a sweetheart, she really is. She's also a hard worker, dedicated and strong willed. All of this is shown in the show and people don't...ever talk about this or say the complete opposite. Many people have said how people are harder on Caitlyn than Jinx for similar or same "crimes" and I have to agree.

Vi -

Vi haters I sincerely, I don't get you guys I'm going to say that straight up. Vi only ever chose with her heart, she's like the most normal person out of everyone in this show. Like if you picked any random stranger off the real world street from anywhere I personally feel like she'd act like any regular person.

Maybe not the giant fist gloves cuz that's scary and being up close fighting is also scary. But using fighting and alcohol to fight off your demons and go into a mad spiral when your life falls apart? That's real shit. Choosing your family over most things? That's real. Choosing your significant other over things is also real.

These are all things in real life that people do all the fucking time and it either pans out or it doesn't but the POINT is when it comes to making choices in relationships it's not ALWAYS about choosing what makes sense. Or what's "morally" correct, she was choosing with her big old stupid dumb truck of a heart and she loved and she believed and she wanted to do everything she possibly could to support the people she loved.

She spent like 7 years in a horrific hell prison and that, as an understatement, does stuff to you especially being put in there at what 16?

She was, I'm going to go out on a limb, in MY interpretation of her character, and say she was not selfish a single time the entire series. She did everything to get back to Powder, and then she learned Powder was Jinx, she tried to help Ekko and Caitlyn as an in-between. And she still chose Powder even if she didn't get to make it to her. Her everything was always helping others, what were her grand motivations and goals? Like nothing, there's nothing there other than loving and being around people she likes.

She had a moment of weakness where she lost everything and was in an incredible amount of pain emotionally and physically when she hit Powder. And she was going to go back for her after she had a MOMENT to try and clear her head after watching her FAMILY DIE AND hitting her sister out of anger. And hitting Powder HORRIFIED her after she realized what she did. Let us not forget Marcus wouldn't even be there if not for Silco working with him in the first place btw. Silco will come up again.

Jinx -

She's my baby. I love her. She's so tragic it kills me and we get a clear picture of who she could've been with love and support in the AU. With Vander and anyone other than fucking SILCO.

Silco side note - People Love to ignore how shitty he was for her. Yes he sincerely loved her, I think he was well written and a compelling character. He also lied, manipulated and directly put her in harm mentally and physically constantly. He encouraged and grew her into a monster, be it for her own defense or more likely for himself and his own hurts he never dealt with.

In the au, I guess when she doesn't accidentally kill her family, she turns out healthier too. And I can't stress enough she DOES accidentally kill her family at...12 years old.

Another more related side note, people also love to look past or not even mention the unbelievable and stupendous fact of bombs and explosives in this universe. Who in their right mind would expect to find a magical bomb during a robbery. Who would expect Jinx to pull out a magically charged fuck-you shark cannon and blow up the counsel building. She just recognized that the bombs were related to the apartment explosion, I doubt she was really thinking HOW explosive they would be packed together in one of her bombs that famously never work. Idk man I don't regularly expect things that shouldn't explode to explode or for them to come up in any scenario really.

Anyway! Not even getting into how fucked it is to be a preteen in general, not getting into how fucked it is to grow up poor and in a violent environment that is Zaun and have the meager and small body type Powder had like. Vi also had to deal with most of that but at her age she had her mom and dad and Vander and Silco. Powder had Vi, as a child herself, and Vander.

ANYWAY. Totally not counting any of that, a 12 year old unknowingly partakes in the Arcane's grand plans to completely fuck over her life and accidentally kills her family. Is, in her mind, disowned by the only person left in her life. Is then collected by Silco who subsequently fuels her insecurities and shatters her identity, sense of self and mind.

At 18! 18! Her world is shattered once more many times over in rapid succession by learning Silco lied to her, Vi is alive and looking for her, Vi is alive and actually she replaced you (in her head) with another blue haired blue eyed sharpshooter who's cooler and better than you ever were and she's a cop. Great awesome and you accidentally snap during a mental breakdown and for the second time kill one of your dads. And you don't get to stay with your sister because you think she doesn't love you anymore.

Jinx and Vi were also not given one single god damned moment alone to talk and clear the damn air and it's a tragedy. I KNOW it's a tragedy but it's still frustrating as hell.

And I don't want to go into every single moment and every single wrong doing on her part, it'd be exhausted. Mental health isn't ever satisfying. Period. There's never a good reason or an acceptable reason why someone does a shitty thing and it isn't an excuse for the action. It's just a reason and if it makes that reason a little more understandable then that kind of sucks when you just wanted to hate that character. When you just wanted the moral high ground.

She bombed the council building. She kidnapped and traumatized Caitlyn on more than one occasion, with the traumatizing part. She killed innocent people. She gassed an entire population of people untargetted and unspecifically. She was planning on dying during that attack. She helped Silco with his drug empire, and his oppression of his own people.

She was 18. Piltover oppressed and took advantage of Zaun for decades if not centuries, any time is too long but the important part was that it was her entire life and her loved ones lives. She was struggling with her identity, not the normal "who am I" we all deal with growing up but a real identity crisis. Powder, the nothing, the Jinx, the can't do anything right, the weak one, and the family killer vs Jinx, a Jinx by choice and to others, a predator, strong, capable, inventive, independent and dangerous. She lost everything over and over and over again and sincerely believed it was her DIRECT fault everyone around her died. She was so in her own head she didn't have the capacity to look at the reality around her and make sane decisions.

She needed help and she needed a rock in the middle of a torrential river to take a break on. She needed a life vest and she did everything she could to keep her head above the water in the ways she was shown how.

It doesn't excuse her actions or take them back. To me, it's hard for me to look at every facet of what happened and only or fully blame Jinx though. That's what she did the entire show and it was objectively not true. In another life, in different circumstances she chose differently because she was in a place to do so. They made an entire episode dedicated to this fact. To me, she was like a caged tiger trained to eat people being released into the wild and then people are mad it ate people. And shes 18.

There's not a neat way to wrap up all of this. If you don't like a character then that's your prerogative. Everyone has different interpretations of what some scenes and symbolism can mean too, but there's some blatant truths about all of these characters in the show. The only way I see some people believe their takes is to ignore the characters entirely tbh and it makes me sad. Or they need to be reminded who the characters are and rewatch the show, which I recommend because you get to watch Arcane again.

[tritoch]

wild to me to see posts like "wow everything in the tempest is named after shakespeare...emet you melodramatic bitch you sure loved theater". because the prospero-emet thing gets played up so hard in the english script and you can carry it so far!

like prospero is an asshole magician who, after being deposed by his brother as duke of milan, settles himself and his daughter on a remote island, enslaves the local spirits using his magic, and bitterly plots to reclaim his past glories. he rules through violence and deceit, and only survives and is reconciled when his plots reach their fruition and his brother is taken to his remote island and plots ensue and everyone decides he was totally right all along and they were huge dicks to him and they're sooooo sorry and he gets to go back and be duke again wow! and it's okay because he's like "i was only doing mean magic to get my rightful spot back and now i'm giving it up because magic is evil. :)"

the tempest is what emet wants his life to be. prospero is not a villain in the text of the tempest. he is barely treated as antagonistic by the text and framing of the play itself. all his abuses, his neglect and control of his daughter, his enslavement of caliban and ariel (local spirits/monsters/people of the island), his deception and plots against his brother, his abuse of magical powers (not awesome, from the pov of the contemporary audience), all that ultimately gets swept aside in the rightness of his return to milan and the warm feeling of the world being set to rights. prospero can't undo the years he spent on the island but they are ultimately a blip in his life before he returns to the rightful state of affairs. his abuse and enslavement of caliban, easily the worst thing he does in the play, is totally set aside when caliban goes "wow now i see how truly benevolent my master is. i love him and see the ways of christian good and i'm so, so appreciative he chose not to kill or beat me even though he totally could have and would have been in the right. he's so just and intelligent." everyone loves and forgives him and they all agree both his management of the island and his ultimate return are so good and so wise and so right.

emet comparing himself to the tempest (or being compared to it, depending on how you want to read the diegetic status of the place names) is absolute wishcasting. it is an attempt to manifest the happy ending he will never, ever get because his sins cannot and would not be forgiven in the way he wants. he wants to imagine himself as the righteous returned duke whose crimes, including the enslavement, abuse, and exploitation of those he saw as his rightful inferiors, were totally worth it, i promise. and if emet is prospero, the warrior of light is his caliban.

[calbeeko]

"will i ever be forgiven

for the crime of my life?

will it haunt me 'til i die?"