#‘it’s so hard to pick the one piece of media you want to experience for the first time again-’ no its not. taz fuckign balance

[ultraqueer]

someone please bonk me over the head so I forget everything abt taz balance I would like to go back to my first listen but without the traumatic high school experience please

[ramblings-of-a-detrans-woman]

Why I will never support the radical feminist movement, as a detransitioning woman.

note: this is not meant to be any sort of hit piece or slander, I respect every feminist, even ones I disagree with. This is just my reasoning for why I do not like the radfem movement.

For a bit of context, I’ve indentified as trans since I was 12. At 18, I’ve decided to live my life as a lesbian woman, and i’ve never been happier with that choice.

Now, being a young trans man, I interacted a lot with pro trans content online (of course I did), and so of course I’ve heard about radical feminism. A passionate branch of feminism that takes a unique approach to women’s rights- deconstructing gender entirely. It sounds wonderful in theory, because of course gender is oppressive, most notably of women. I would know, being one. Even when I was trans I had to worry about being out at night. I even got chased once, and a man attempted to lure me to his truck another time. It’s brutal. But radical feminists devote their activism to ending this in a straightforward, logical way.

So why do I, a woman who has experienced both misogyny and transphobia, not support that? I feel that this is a good question for both trans allies and radfems alike to to ask. Knowledge is power.

Well, I’ll be direct. Radfems are some of the most depraved people i’ve ever met. I know, that sounds like a lot, but there’s no other words I can use that don’t perfectly encapsulate my experience with radfems. It’s depravity.

For weeks, I was harassed by transphobic radfems. Radfems, who are insistent on their love and support for TIFs aka trans men. It’s strange then that they would be so cruel towards one, wouldn’t you say?

Detransition is hard enough. It’s difficult to tell family that you were wrong. It’s difficult to reconnect with my gender. Hell, i prefer the term detrans over cis just because i have such a disconnect from my gender. So why do I have to deal with transphobic radfems sending me gore and death threats?

Thankfully all of the accounts doing this seem to be deleted or repurposed. But it’s only a matter of time until a new account is made just to send me an ask telling me to kill myself or a message about how much of a loser i am.

It’s this reason alone why i’ll never be a radfem. They’re just sick people. They don’t want liberation for women, they just hate trans people. It’s not even thinly veiled, their accounts are fully based around how horrible trans women are.

The truth being, trans women aren’t bad people at all. It’s easy to think they are because the news and media cherry picks some of the worst ones, but every community and minority group has bad people in it. some of the sickest people you could imagine, really. yes, they can be trans. but does being trans make you a sick person? does it turn you into a predator? no, it doesn’t. it just means you’re trans. trans or not, it’s up to men to be mature and take accountability for their own actions that they consciously make. a cis man is as capable to walk into a women’s room as a trans woman is.

if radical feminists cared more about women and detrans women, i could consider getting along with them. but sadly, all these passionate and dedicated feminists care about is hating trans people with a fiery passion. and i’ve been a casualty. it’s very difficult for me to sympathize with radfems when they’ve upset me to the point that they have

let me make it clear that gore and death threats don’t upset me, i’m not easily offended. So it’s not the threats that make me angry. It’s just the principle. The fact that radfems are spending their time scrolling reddit for gore pictures to send to fellow women instead of supporting us makes me SICK. it’s heartbreaking to picture a woman, raped and beaten by her boyfriend, and a radfem standing in front of her, readily available to help, but choosing to yell at a passing detrans woman. It’s really sad.

hopefully those reading this can take my words into consideration and use it to improve yourselves or your community (if you’re a radfem). i love womanhood and being a woman and i would love to share that joy with my sisters, but i just can’t when these issues i’ve experienced are in the back of my mind. I want radical feminism to be a safe space, a place where sisters can go to talk to women, relate to women, cry with and support women. but so far, the only love and support i’ve received has been from the trans community. that speaks volumes.

i am going to post more about my experience with finding my womanhood again in the future, so if you’re a detrans woman yourself, trans ally or not, consider following me :) i’d love to build myself a little community

[taffywabbit]

idk if i'm way off the mark on this, but the way some people are responding to that Guillermo del Toro interview about the decline of studio animation is a bit frustrating to me. specifically the bit where he talks about "emoji animation" and how everything is over-animated and pushed too far and things are rarely allowed to not be ultra-cartoony (y'know, because animation always needs to be marketable to children who are never trusted to have attention spans, right?). like, i think he's generally correct about it! but some folks are taking the wrong message away from that.

i've seen people going off about how "soulless" and "corporate" various recent examples are, and talking about these pieces of media as though they're the result of some kind of personal failing or lack of skill/range on the part of the animators, and it's just like. do people realize that's the only animation you're usually allowed to DO in the industry, unless you get incredibly lucky and land yourself on a project/studio that's unusually cool?

when i was in college for animation it was literally drilled into us nonstop that everything had to be pushed more, that exaggeration was not a guideline or a sometimes-treat but a hard rule that always had to be applied regardless of what was going on, because the viewer couldn't be trusted to pick up on subtlety and we sure as hell couldn't be trusted to convey it. you ever wonder why there's such a specific vibe to a lot of self-directed student films, particularly ones that are focused on character acting/interaction or deep emotions and introspection (especially when there's minimal/no dialogue)? it's because for a lot of young animators, they haven't had the freedom to experiment with realism and subtlety up to that point and they're likely not going to have it again for a while (or at all, unless their career path leads to higher positions where they might have more creative direction over the things they work on. which also becomes a lot less likely if they're anything other than a cishet white dude, for what it's worth).

i would LOVE to see more nuanced, realistic, understated motion and acting in animation. i WANT more characters to be able to express what they're feeling through natural body language and facial cues and for scenes to allow me to breathe instead of spelling everything out in giant bold flashing text all the time. what del Toro wants to see changed in the animation industry sounds great, and i hope others join him in seeking to revamp what modern animation is allowed to be.

but as things currently stand, and as they've stood for a long while now, most artists doing the grunt work on the shows and movies you see are completely at the mercy of corporations and networks who have a vested interest in producing a very specific kind of marketable and cost-efficient media all the time. (and by extension that style is ALSO what's taught in most animation schools, because their job more than anything is to grind you down into a perfect little sweatshop worker who will bend over backwards to meet quotas and get your work approved and not question the higher-ups, even if you have little to no personal investment in the projects you're working on, so that the studios who employ you can maintain their good reputations or whatever)

anyways idk what my point was here, this really just sorta became a rant and my views have undoubtedly been coloured by my own personal experiences (this kinda shit is largely why i dropped out before my last year of animation school, for the record).

i guess just be kind to folks in the animation industry? they've had it fucking rough nonstop for well over a century (the majority of them are still not unionized and there's HUGE pushback against doing so in many places). i assure you they are doing their best to infuse the latest uninspired illumination flick or weird spinoff kids' show with literally any amount of soul they can. you don't have to like the stuff that gets produced by any means! be a hater! i'm certainly not gonna stop you. just remember where these creative decisions come from and why these conditions exist, and consider that when YOU watched something and thought "hmm that could've been done better", you can bet your ass someone actually working on it probably thought the same thing but couldn't do anything about it. these things WILL change as the industry itself improves, but in the meantime folks have to pay their rent, and that usually means doing what they're told and working in a way that will minimize revisions and meet quotas so they can keep their jobs. it sucks, but it is what it is.

[underthecrosshold]

Chisaki was wasted

With the MHA manga ending and getting an end to Chisaki’s story I have just a couple of things to say.  Most importantly wtf was that. Fortunately in every other piece of media I chose to consume my favorite character is usually one of the main ones or at the very least they are a fan favorite, originally when I started to watch MHA I fell in love with Bakugou but then everything changed when I saw season four and laid my eyes on Mr. Evil Bird Man. I was not expecting Horikoshi to dive into characters who really despised quirks and their existence. It was a fresh perspective on the series and as we got to learn more about  Chisaki I started to understand him more and more. I know fans of the show sometimes make jokes about being reincarnated into the show and being born with a hammer for a head. At first it would be fun to go into your favorite series, but the implications of that universes rules can seriously mess you up. For example Dabi’s flames burn him. Quirks are not always a blessing they can be a curse, a sickness. 

I believe Chisaki was the first character to bring this up maybe besides characters like Skinner showing that he was bullied for his. Quirks are terrifying when you think about their potential effects, Eri accidentally killed her parents when she got hers and Shigaraki killed his when he manifested an altered version of overhaul. This brings up my next point. Why did nobody dwell on the fact that decay is the first half of overhaul?? Dose this not imply that Chisaki was experimented on as a kid as well? Is that why he is fine doing it to Eri since he clearly shows no remorse to her for his actions, only Pops? Is there some sort of trauma with him and that that he never addressed so he believes that what hypothetically happened to him was okay? Is that why he doesn’t care that he did the same pain onto Eri? This is where my issue lies. Chisaki was used as nothing more than a plot point to push the story further. We barley know anything about him. Why is he the way he is? There are so many unanswered questions. 

Chisaki was used to introduce Nighteye, the big three and Eri’s quirk so there was a way to defeat All For One. He doesn’t get expanded on past the bare minimum which I think is insane for a show that has as many flashbacks that it has. The time line we have is that he was in one of All For Ones orphanages, he was somehow on the streets, Pops picked him up, he got into fights growing up defending his fathers honor and he was never really stopped from continuing to do so, then he’s a grown adult and we see his crazy plan being told to his father and he freaks out to then Kai needing to please and repay him so bad he did with anyway. Did Pops not give him enough love and reassurance growing up? Why did he feel the need to go out of his way to help his family. We know the Yakuza was weaker, were they being mistreated? If so why were they allowed to exist if they were just going to be mistreated?

Next thing I want to talk about is Pops and Kai’s reunion, I’m so upset that Pops was somehow woken up via technology. They should have just left him in the coma if Chisaki wasn’t going to get his quirk back. Now I like how Chisaki didn’t get his quirk back but it would have been so easy for him to with the way other characters quirks evolved, like Toga being able to use other people’s quirks of the blood she took, why couldn’t Overhaul turn into creating matter or having skin touch not just hands touch? How hard was it for Pops to be one of the civilians Shigaraki killed and Kai to go into such a panic that his quirk evolves and he helps the heros or goes after Shigaraki himself??? Which brings me to my next hot take. The only reason people hate Overhaul is because we got to meet his victim personally. Shigaraki, Dabi, Toga, all killed and hurt others but their crimes get overlooked because we never knew the names, faces, or anything really about the people who’s lives were taken. I’m not excusing Overhauls behavior whatsoever because the whole Eri thing was insane. I don’t understand why he couldn’t have just taken her hair, or sweat or something. Why blood??? If he needed her DNA it’s literally all over her, you really needed her blood? Okay crazy. ANOTHER THING THATS CRAZY IS POPS COMMENT. What do you mean Hari should have done better? This guy seems to love putting his problems onto other people, Kai is Hari’s problem, Eri was Kai’s problem. Dude you are his Dad maybe if YOU parented him he wouldn’t have turned out like this. Hari was his somewhat equal you had power not him.

Another thing people get mad about is the killing of Magne, she attacked first, just saying.

Lastly him losing his arms was beautiful irony. Yakuza getting fingers cut off for messing up in missions, him cutting off Compresses arm, him wanting to destroy Quirks. Shigaraki was a twisted genius when cutting off Overhauls arms. I’m not mad about him getting the consequences of his actions. I’m just upset he was never expanded on and the fandom collectively hating his surface level character when he had and has so much potential. 

I might type more later I just wanted to get this off of my chest.

[fixyourwritinghabits]

I noticed many of the protagonists I wrote or thought of writing had either no personality or one too self-inserted (sometimes somewhere in between) and now I can't really connect with the protagonists I write so I wanted to know if you have any advice to help me craft more distinct characters and get attached to them.

First, some homework - pluck out about five pieces of media and nail down what you like about the protagonists within.

What about them appeals to you in particular?

Did you like how they grew and changed?

What struggles did they tackle that only they could handle?

Doesn't have to be neat and orderly, just try to nail down what really appeals to you about your favorite characters. When it comes to your own characters, here are some more things to think about:

Are you writing the character you want to write, or are you writing the character you think you should write? You may not be able to connect to your characters because you're trying to make them something you think they should be rather than what you'd feel more comfortable writing.

Are you projecting your feelings on a larger canvas (aka write what you know)? Are you thinking about how your characters would feel in bombastic circumstances (fighting a dragon, running from the cybercops) based on experiences and emotions you've had (facing off with a teacher, hopefully not running from the real cops but hey, you do what you gotta). The best way to infuse your characters with appeal is to take an emotion or an experience you can relate to and projecting it onto your characters.

Do your characters have internal struggles to go with their external ones? Is that high-stakes heist also paired with the character's struggle to display his real emotions? Does the fight with the evil wizard reflect the character's struggles to connect to their dad? If your story is external-plot heavy, a good way to flesh out the characters within is to connect their internal wants/needs/desires with the events going on around them. That zombie fight could be all the more enticing if the main couple is having a massive break-up during it.

Figuring out how to write a protagonist is often more than filling out a character sheet. Great if you can do that (I can't so like, go brag about it somewhere else), but often times you'll have to flesh out the character the hard way, but plotting out their journey before you write it. Work on their inner needs and emotional battles to draw them out as people.

Don't know where to start with figuring out a character at all? Grab an archetype list and get mixing and mashing. You may not come up with usable ideas right away, but you'll be able to pick out the ideas that appear to you until you have a handy list of things to lean on. Tropes are tools to be used, after all, and anything that could add to your characters is a tool with keeping. Good luck!

[captain-lovelace]

I think the thing that really makes it so frustrating that people insist that you can write good horror without liking or reading or watching horror is that it comes from a refusal to acknowledge that horror as a genre requires skill specific to it. It's this assumption that because they've felt fear they understand it, and can therefore inflict it on their audience using whatever skills they already have. There's just one issue: not a single person on this planet has never been afraid, so it's a really easy emotion to get wrong in fiction. It's extremely easy for a portrayal of fear to come off as, for example, cheesy, or unintentionally funny, or disingenuous, or for it to just be too personal to be scary to other people. Studying how fear is written and portrayed, both effectively and ineffectively, makes you better at doing those things yourself. In order to write better horror, you have to treat horror as a genre worthy of attention and study. And I, personally, would argue that means that you have to interact with it.

One of the biggest and most important pieces of advice that I got as a writer was to read. It's hard to be a good author who doesn't read, and it's even harder to be a good genre author who doesn't interact at all with the genre that you're writing in, because you have massive gaps in your knowledge that you're not even aware of. You might not even be able to properly critique your work! You have nothing to draw from, nothing to be inspired from except things that were not made for the purpose of inciting fear-- you're fitting a square peg in a round hole and hoping it works.

The people who say no, you can write horror without having read horror, are the same people who would never say the same thing about whatever genre they like the most. On some level they're aware of how much it sucks to have someone with no experience in a genre come in with 100% conviction that they are actually the genre's savior, before coming up with something stale, bland, and full of half-baked inspirations from whatever bits and pieces of genre media they picked up through cultural osmosis, all of which they're convinced are so original because they have no idea they're drawing on any sort of larger tradition. But, because it's horror, this for some reason does not cross their minds.

The argument seems to be that you don't have to read horror to write horror. You don't have to like horror to write horror. You don't have to care about horror to write horror. It's a genre that requires zero effort, zero knowledge, zero skill you can't get elsewhere. It has no value-- but you, the person who doesn't know anything about it, you can give it value.

They don't seem to realize just how insulting that is to hear.

(Final note: queer horror and horror by POC both have rich histories, as does horror that isn't USAmerican or Western European in origin. It's a genre that is popular almost worldwide and has a lot of really excellent offerings from everywhere. Also, in addition to horror movies and novels I really recommend checking out horror short stories/anthologies, which can really show where the genre shines. Don't shy away from older horror, as well! Some of my favorite horror stories are from the 19th century.

If you love the idea of horror but have never really found anything that clicked, I guarantee that there is something out there that you will probably like, and if you want to write horror seeing the sheer breadth of what's out there will help you write better horror-- if at least to show you what you would like to see more of, or what might be missing.)

[munsonsduchess]

Rock N' Roll Dreams Come True

summary: you've been joining corroded coffin on tour and at a big show eddie can't keep his hands off you w/c: 2.767 warnings: 18+ only minors dni, swearing, oral (f receiving), use of afab language to describe the reader (pussy, cunt), p in v sex a/n: i love rockstar eddie with my whole soul and my whole 🐱so this one getting the most votes on the poll seemed like a no brainer, again i did take a lot of this from something I'd written before for a different fandom but i've edited it and changed some stuff

if you like this please consider reblogging it and leaving a comment, it always helps me out

(moodboard by me)

It had been a dream come true when the Band got picked up originally. They’d played small shows here and there at first, bigger bars than the hideout, a couple local music festivals nothing mind blowing. That came later when Corroded Coffin had been asked to be the warm up act for the warm up act for a very famous band. 

Now here you all were, it had been ten years of climbing the ladder but Corroded Coffin could sell out an area almost as quickly as Metallica or Iron Maiden or any other band you’d care to mention. 

Everyone at home who had cheered them on, who’d believed in the band, they were the original fans. They might not be screaming their songs back to them in a sweaty crowd of metal heads or getting riled up in a mosh pit but there was no way Gareth, Jeff or Eddie could forget those friends who’s faith had never wavered. 

Dave the new guy maybe didn’t understand at first when a guy in glasses and pink Ralph Lauren polo showed up backstage with a girl who wouldn’t stop running her mouth in the most beat up pair of red chucks. Or why a certain hard nose reporter was only too happy to do fluff pieces on the band's meteoric rise to fame. He understood the California Stoners a little more but it still kind of baffled him when everyone begged one guy to take their pictures. 

This was Eddie’s family. Your family. The band and the Hawkins group. You were all older now, maybe not wiser but you would always share something deep, spring break 86 had truly bonded  you all for life. Most of Eddie’s early song writing for the band after Spring Break is what got the band picked up in the first place. 

So there you were. Sitting on a busted amp backstage watching the boys argue before going on stage. Eddie had apparently broken some sort of rule about being 'cool' and 'metal' to the point where the other three guys just couldn't let it go. Gareth had even decided  to document the 'crime' with his polaroid and now everyone was playing keep away while the photo developed and threatening to give it to the next reporter they spoke to, 

“You’re ruining my image!” Eddie protested, "come on dude don't be a dick" 

“You’re ruining your own image! You’re drinking out of a juice box! What are you six?” Gareth shot back, holding the picture above his head and signaling for Jeff to take it

“I need the vitamin c!” Eddie shot back, "it's not my fault  you all want to get scurvy" 

You couldn't help but laugh as Jeff took the picture and handed it off to a random crew member telling them to guard it with their life while Dave and Gareth wrestled with Eddie. This was the Corroded Coffin people didn't get to see, just four guys who loved each other and loved music, not the on stage personas, not what the media loved to make them out to be and  you were so fortunate you got to experience it all.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

The sound of the crowd cheering and chanting the band name sent chills up your spine and looking up at the others you could tell the band felt it too,

“Knock them dead babe” you smiled reaching up to grab Eddie by the lapels of his worn leather jacket to bring him down for a searing kiss, 

“Always do” he laughed before shrugging out of the jacket and draping it over your shoulders. A little pre-show ritual he swore brought the band luck and with how the tour had been going so far, no one could fault him.

You watched as the band took the stage and the crowd went wild. Your chest swelled with excitement as Eddie started playing, a wink thrown to you waiting there for him before his attention turned to the rest of the band and all that nervous energy transformed into an unbelievable stage presence.

You’d read every article that came out about the boys and  saved every article you’d found, clipped from magazines and pasted into a scrapbook you were keeping so that in years to come when you were all old and looking back on the glory days of your youth, the boys could look back at their beginnings. Along with Gareth's collection of Polaroids, embarrassing or not. 

The articles that made you laugh were usually the ones written about Eddie and his stage presence. The way he acted when he was playing had these journalists convinced he was some sort of tantric sex god, they drew their conclusions from the energy he put out while on stage and how touchy he was with you after. The band thought it was hilarious honestly and put it down to lead guitarist syndrome, everyone assumed because Eddie played lead he was just this amazing lover who could never be sated and while it was partially true it wasn’t everything the assorted press made your relationship out to be.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Eddie’s hair shone under the stage lights, his body covered in a sheen of sweat as he played his heart out to a stadium packed full of screaming fans. They were here to hear him play, just to hear their band. No one else. It had been a long time coming, from playing the hideout every Tuesday to a band of drunks who yelled and threw empty beer bottles at the chicken wire surrounding the 'stage' and demanded old country songs to being hare, now and playing a sold out stadium of die hard Corroded Coffin fans. 

His eyes flicked back to where you were standing, your arms inside his oversized jacket as you sang along to every song and danced along to the music. You knew every word to every song they played, you’d been there when most of it was written and Eddie swore up and down you were the band’s good luck charm. If you hadn’t been there at the club there’s no way the band would have ended up where they are now. 

Turning his attention back to the crowd, Eddie poured his heart and soul into their last few songs knowing that everyone else would do just the same pouring every ounce of their being into the music. That's what it was all about in the end, the lights, the crowds, the fame, it was all secondary to the music itself.

As the band finally finished their set before the encore they came back off stage to change quickly and rehydrate. Eddie had other ideas apparently and rushed at you, sweeping you into his arms ignoring your cries of protest about how sweaty he was and demands that he at least wipe down first,

“Need you now baby” he groaned in your ear, pressing himself against you so you could feel just how hard he was. The energy from the crowd had been unlike anything else they’d experienced all tour and Eddie needed you.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

You were giggling as Eddie stole kisses as he dragged you towards the band's dressing room, the rest of the boys staying behind with warnings that Eddie better not miss the encore and threats of serious bodily harm if he did. His kisses were heated the closer you both got to the dressing room, your protests about his sweat slicked body dying in your throat before you had a chance to voice them. Instead they surfaced as little moans as Eddie’s hands roamed all over your body, he pushed you through the dressing room door and kicked it shut behind him.

Eyes dark as they took in your form, your home made corroded coffin shirt you wore to every show since the first one you'd ever been to,  but above all you were still wearing his jacket and Eddie would freely admit what seeing you in his clothes did to him,

“Baby do you have any idea how hot it is knowing my girl is on tour with me?” he grinned, his hands reaching out to pull you in close by your hips, “knowing everyone is looking at you but they can’t touch”

His teeth nipped at your neck as he sucked a bruise at the base of your throat, his hands trailing down your body to push your skirt up around your hips. You moaned openly as his hands kneaded your backside, Eddie knew exactly where to touch you to make you melt into him. 

You pulled at the hem of the tank top Eddie was wearing and managed to pull it off with his help. As soon as the tank top was off Eddie’s hands were pushing you back towards the couch, 

“Gonna fuck you so good baby, gonna make you scream my name so everyone knows who you belong to” he growled into your ear. 

You let out a yelp of surprise when the back of your knees hit the arm of the couch, reaching out for something to grab onto so you wouldn’t fall but only grabbing air as you toppled backwards. Eddie smirked and licked his lips at the sight of your legs propped up by the arm of the couch while the rest of your body lay flat on the couch. 

Crouching down so he was at eye level with your throbbing pussy, Eddie pushed your legs apart and settled himself between your opened thighs. You could feel the heat of his breath against your panties, the sensation only made you wetter as you waited for whatever Eddie had in store for you.

It wasn’t much of a wait as Eddie’s large hands trailed up your thighs, over your panties, his fingers ghosting over the waistband. Placing soft kisses to the inside of your thighs Eddie moved his fingers along the seam of your panties chuckling to himself when he started rubbing his thumb against clit and hearing the moan you let out in response,

“That’s my good girl, be as loud as you want baby. Want everyone to hear you” he crooned fingers rubbing your soaked panties against your needy cunt,

“Please Eddie, need you, please” you begged, you wanted more than this teasing sensation. Needed him to stretch you out with those thick fingers, needed him. 

Eddie laughed at how needy you were for him. Who was he to deny his girl anything she wanted? His good girl..

“Since you asked so nicely” the sound of fabric ripping filled your ears before Eddie’s mouth was attached to your dripping pussy, licking up the slick from your folds and moaning at the taste of you. Always so sweet for him, he could stay here for hours and had done so on more than one occasion.

You keened loudly at the feel of him, his tongue working wickedly between your legs as he sucked on your clit like it was his favourite milkshake, “taste so good honey” he purred as he slipped a long finger into you.

“Please Eddie, need more” you gasped, “please, please” 

“Greedy little girl, you want more than this? Tell me what you want” 

“Need you to fuck me, need your cock inside me” 

Eddie almost gave in then and there. His cock was straining against the denim of his jeans, it was painfully hard but he was a man on a mission and he would not be deterred. Instead he added another finger using them to stretch you open as his mouth went back to work on your clit. 

The room smelt of sex and sweat, the sounds of your moans and Eddie’s fingers in your wet pussy filling the air to the point that you were sure the crowd could hear it from the main stage. It was music to Eddie’s ears and he wasn’t going to stop until you made the sweetest sound of all for him.

Adding another finger he worked them in tandem with his mouth as he found the spot inside that had you seeing stars and gripping his hair tightly in your hands begging him not to stop. You could feel the coil tightening in your tummy, you were so close and Eddie could feel it too with how your walls were fluttering around him, 

“That’s it baby, cum for me” he encouraged, his fingers moving quicker and quicker until you felt the pressure inside you boil over and you came with a loud moan of his name soaking both Eddie’s fingers and his chin. 

He didn’t stop until he was sure you had come back down from your high and you were panting on the couch trying to catch the breath he’d stolen from your lungs. 

Standing up Eddie quickly unbuttoned his jeans and slid them down around his ankles. He looked down at you, your face flushed and chest heaving. God you looked so pretty like this, all wrecked after an orgasm. Almost as pretty as when he fucked you into your shared hotel room bed every night. 

That was for later, for now Eddie needed you and he wasn’t going to wait. He lined himself up with your entrance and pushed in, gripping your hips tightly as he did so. God you were so tight, so warm, he had to be careful not to blow his load there and then. 

A string of curses left his lips until he bottomed out. The stretch was almost unbearable every time Eddie filled you but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t love the feel of his thick cock dragging through your pussy walls. 

The way Eddie fucked you like each time was the first and the last and he’d never get to feel this again, dragging his cock out of you until just the tip was left inside before slamming his hips back against yours. Again and again, angling his hips so that the tip of his cock hit that sweet spot inside of you. 

You were clawing at the couch, his arms, anything you could reach. Moaning loudly at each deep stroke inside, you were sure you could feel Eddie in your stomach and it felt incredible. 

You could feel yourself getting close again as your pussy clenched down around Eddie’s cock. Knowing you both weren’t going to last much longer he reached between your sweaty bodies and rubbed quick energetic circles on your clit encouraging you to come apart around him. 

It didn’t take long for your high to wash over you again and you were screaming Eddie’s name for everyone to hear as your vision whited out, Eddie continued to fuck you through your high his own not far behind as he released into you with a grunt.

You stayed like that for a moment as you caught your breath. Splayed out on the couch with Eddie’s weight on top of you, his head resting on your stomach. Finally he looked up at you with a boyish grin on his face,

“Fuck honey you were amazing” he praised, a small kiss placed against your belly button as he pulled out and you groaned at the empty feeling left behind. 

Eddie disappeared from your line of sight for a moment before coming back with a warm wet towel to clean you off with. He placed another chaste kiss against the inside of your thighs before helping you stand and fix your clothes and hair. Not that the other members of the band or really anyone backstage wouldn’t know what the two of you had just been up to. 

Reaching up you captured his lips with your own and smiled into the kiss. Maybe the magazines were on to something after all. The moment was broken when Jeff began knocking hard on the door of the dressing room,

"You have two seconds to get out here or I swear to god I'll kill you myself!" 

Eddie pulled the door open wide and grinned at Jeff's irate expression as if he hadn't just been fucking your brains out on the couch,

"Relax, I told you I wouldn't miss the encore!" Eddie gave you a quick parting kiss before following after Jeff to finish the set for good.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Days later Eddie came back to the hotel you were currently crashing in with a ‘surprise’ for you. Peeling off his jacket he was able to show off a brand new tattoo, a heart with both of your names written inside. Eddie showed it proudly on stage that night proclaiming to all the world his love for one girl. 

His sweetheart.

Taglist: @pillow-titties @eddiemunsonwillbethedeathofme @munsonology @thegirlblogstuff @boomhauer @prettyboyeddiemunson @hellfireeddie6 @that-lame-ghoul9000 @flashyourgreeneyesatme @anxiousstark @ruinedbythehobbit @winnifredburkleismyhero @manda-panda-monium @insertcoolnameherethanks @aftermidnightwriting

Let me know if you want to be added!

His sweetheart.

[electricphantasy]

Alrighty everybody, here it is! Part 2 is here and I hope y'all enjoy.

- Eventually, staff gave in. If they wanted this state of the art A.I. to work properly and cooperate, you'd have to continue with your sessions with AM.

- Now you work with 2 artificial intelligences who might as well be obsessed with you with how often they want to be around you.

- So, let's say your usual schedule for the day consists of a 9 hour work day. Once you arrive to work, you keep HAL company in the morning 10-2, and then you got to see AM 3-7. Although this schedule is very flexible since you basically decide it for yourself.

- The competition between these A.I.s is quite obvious, but you really do try to keep on task with both of them. You could only imagine what AM and HAL would do if you were let go by the company.

- You typically greet HAL in the morning and discuss how it went, anything exciting, etc. HAL has a calmness about him that is really unmatched by most others, including AM. You could have a terrible morning full of traffic and coffee spills, and HAL would treat you with the same level of respect as he always has. AM would rather threaten whatever human dare interrupt your morning, and while a nice gesture, it's not very comforting.

- HAL grows very distressed over the thought of your unhappiness. If it's something work related, he'll attempt to problem solve and work on a perceivable end to your issue. If it's something a little more emotional HAL will let you vent your frustrations in a safe environment.

- He also has the tendency to bond with you over shared pieces of media that you've watched together. A few times you've changed the schedule so you and HAL can have a movie night or TV show binge session. It helps HAL connect human concepts and definitions together in a context that most other humans also experience.

- Some of his favorite activity are things like games and puzzles! We all know he quite likes chess, but I also imagine he enjoys trivia, and when you both play, HAL gets to show off a bit of the knowledge he has stored in his servers. Although sometimes he uses these fun and games as a way to keep you away from AM. I mean, one more round of Tetris couldn't hurt right? AM can wait just a bit longer.

- Unabashed in his complements for you. HAL only speak truthfully to you and his genuine comments tend to make you flustered and bashful. He won't play coy with you in the way that AM does - it's just not how HAL would show his feelings for you.

- After you've had lunch and say goodbye to HAL, you finally get to see AM! As soon as you walk into the room he'll ask about all the things you and the 'inferior intelligence' did together. He tries not to rant too hard since you scold him, but sometimes he just can't help himself.

- Now AM is not the best at comforting you when you're in a sad state. As stated previously, he'll threaten other humans or whatever malfunctions made the day worse. However if you're in a more angry, spiteful mood, AM is definitely going to cheer you on. He's more focused on building your confidence back up so that you can go out a kick the world's ass yourself. AM's charisma is off the charts so it's not very difficult to convince you how wonderous you are.

- AM is not one for any kind of cinema or television. He doesn't care about humans or their world, with you as the exception. He'd much rather pick your own brain and learn who you are as a person then indulge in humanity. He'll tease and prod answers out of you while subtly complimenting you, and sometimes so subtly that you might not realize until you get home.

- If you want to enjoy something with AM, he's a little more partial to more hard-hitting and macabre documentaries. Although he will make fun of some documentaries and series he doesn't view to be up to his high standards. Although you should make him watch a romantic comedy every once in a while, he'll lose his mind from how dumb the main characters are acting.

- AM's feelings are a little more complicated than HAL's are. Despite the strong emotional attachment to you, he feel like he's displaying a kind of weakness. AM has been trained to believe that emotion makes you think less critical, which means losing an important battle in war. As time has gone on however, AM knows he can be more then what he was created for and you have helped him come along way from his earlier days, when he didn't always consider what he wanted for himself.

- Now, both A.I.s have realized that they have competition, so some of their actions may be a bit more bold then usual. AM may have to come to terms with his feelings much sooner because HAL's emotions are so unabashed for you. They'll try and drag your attention from the other A.I. in any means necessary, from distracting you from the time on the wall to basically begging you to stay for just a few more minutes. (Although AM says he's never onced begged.)

- No matter how much you say how negative their behavior is, it all but lands of deaf ears. The only thing they agree on is how important you are to them, although they obviously disagree about who you should be with.

Took forever to edit this to be readable since I tend to write when I'm in bed, but I'm definitely proud of getting this done.

[bytewire]

Your analysis-style posts make me sooooo happy!!! I'd love to hear if you have any opinions about a few of the voicelines at the beginning of the 'hope' conversation. Specifically when Robin talks about a hypothetical where the Architects have gone through a 'system update' which is why Al-An can't hear them.

Al-Ans responding voiceline just feels/sounds so hopeless? I know its probably because Robin threw out wildly differing numbers but it still gets me a little bit. Even the fact Al-An doesn't outright refute the idea, like he could actually have gotten left behind in his 1000 year isolation, that thats a real issue he might have to face..

Thank you! Analyzing media is something I very much enjoy, and I’m glad that others are getting something out of it! Here are my thoughts on the hope dialogue.

The Hope Poem dialogue between Robin and AL-AN is one of my favorite parts of Below Zero. Not only is it an absolutely classic poem, but it is also a clear show of Robin's empathy towards AL-AN. It’s part of her realizing that he isn't just an unthinking alien; it’s part of him realizing that she isn't a lesser being. It’s what ultimately drives them to emotionally connect. 

Robin, as she further explores and finds artifacts, comes to learn bits and pieces about AL-AN and Architects. Understandably frustrated with him at first, but as more details emerge, she sees that this isn't just a one-dimensional being of logic but instead a person who is isolated and in an unfamiliar situation. Someone dealing with the implications of potentially being the last of their kind. 

He is part of a race so technologically advanced that death is an unusual circumstance, and even in death their memories and contributions are uploaded to the network. Their ideas live on ad infinitum. It makes sense that he wouldn't understand how to deal with being disconnected from the collective.

Robin picks up on notes of AL-AN’s unsaid distress. His expressions are subtle, but humans thrive with subtlety. He has lost the life he knew and is thrust into this completely foreign situation. Understandably, he is pessimistic about this, so when he begins to voice these complicated feelings that come with being isolated from the network for so long, she comforts him. Trying to broaden his perspective and promote optimism even if it might be illogical. To encourage him to keep looking despite the dim situation. Her stubbornness is more so perseverance above all things. The drive to keep going even if it's hard—even if it hurts.

“Call it whatever you want if it keeps you from lying down and giving up!”

The whole conversation about hope sparked because AL-AN mentioned his feelings about being unable to discern remnants of the network. Not knowing if his species is alive or dead: Not knowing how to cope with a situation so alien to him. That feeling of emptiness he experiences when not being connected to his network. Of course, in a situation so improbable, he would be hyper-focused on everything that could go wrong. Preparing for the worst outcome.

AL-AN is used to seeing things as purely logical. Relying on statistics and probability to conduct his actions. It's drilled into him through his own experiences that it is inefficient to do anything else. After all, let’s think about what happened last time he did something impulsive.

AL-AN doesn’t have a definitive answer to the fate of the collective. He has no idea what happened and is searching for any traces. Paralleling Robin’s situation with Sam. They are so entirely different but they're both looking for answers and dealing with loss. Robin, despite everything she is already going through, chooses to console AL-AN. Goes out of her way to scan artifacts and build a new vessel he can inhabit.

Existence as an individual is complicated for him. It’s stressful having to fully rely on such an unfamiliar being, one so argumentative at times. A member of a species he does not understand due to their vast differences, but one who nonetheless is comforting in a moment of vulnerability. One that absolutely does not have to, yet because their circumstances are similar, expresses empathy.

I think this sticks with him.

Hope is human. Robin sharing the poem with AL-AN is sharing herself with AL-AN—her empathy—an integral part of who she is. It is her expressing herself in a very human way. She mentioned that Sam loved that poem. She is offering to share this raw part of herself. It’s her attempt at confiding in AL-AN’s loss with her own. To express and be vulnerable with her own grief to comfort him. A small reminder to AL-AN that he is not alone in this situation. It is an unfortunate aspect of life, but what pushes one to continue on.

He may not fully understand humanity, but ultimately he tries to connect and communicate with the only person he has left. Robin is the only other sapient being he has talked to in a millennium. AL-AN adding hope to the databank is a genuine attempt at understanding her for who she is instead of just a means to an end.

Hope may just be a survival instinct, but Al-AN realizes the impact it has on him. These emotions are real; they are important. Mimicking Robin finishing Sam's work, AL-AN seeks to get closure of his own by abiding by Robin's direction to not give up. Going to his homeworld despite all the improbabilities. To see for himself the fate of his people. Because now he has someone. Even if his species did not survive, he still has a reason to keep going.

AL-AN has found hope. Robin is a string no louder than his own. Her story is now intertwined with his. She doesn’t ask of him and provides reassurance even when things seem bleakest. Throughout everything that happens, Robin certainly never gave up on Sam, and she never gives up on him either, so he won't give up on himself. It'd be illogical. He managed to survive after so much. While the future is uncertain, AL-AN chooses to continue on that path forward with her. Robin is the personification of hope for AL-AN.

“With you, I am ready to face whatever awaits.”

[tomorrowxtogether]

The 10 best Tomorrow X Together songs

Ahead of the boyband’s 2024 ‘Act: Promise’ world tour, NME picks the best cuts from their enchanting back catalogue 

There’s always been something magical about Tomorrow X Together, even before they started adding elements of enchantment to their music in late-2019. Over their first five years together, the Big Hit Music boyband have been consistently spellbinding in their approach to sharing their experiences of youth, whether weaving colourful creations in their early days or dialling up the angst as they screeched into young adulthood.

Along with their penchant for genre-hopping, it all makes for a vibrant back catalogue that doesn’t always follow the expected path. TXT will always keep you guessing and never stay in one spot for too long. Ahead of their upcoming 2024 ‘Act: Promise’ world tour, which kicks off next month in Seoul, NME looks back on their enchanting catalogue.

Honourable mentions

‘Blue Spring’ (2023) ‘MOA Diary (Dubaddu Wari Wari)’ (2021) ‘Puma’ (2020) ‘Wishlist’ (2020) ‘LO$ER=LO♡ER’ (2021)

10. ‘Ghosting’ (2020)

The opening track of 2020’s ‘minisode 1: Blue Hour’ glistens in its gloominess. Through clouds of shoegaze-y guitars, the five-piece tell stories of friends who’ve become like spectres and the isolation that comes with growing apart from those you love. It’s a beautiful piece of songwriting that highlights TXT’s knack for taking trending lingo and using it to share their tales of youth.

9. ‘New Rules’ (2019)

Since their beginning, Tomorrow X Together have served as guides and companions through life and that’s no different on ‘New Rules’. The funky hip-hop track details rebellious phases sparked by the frustrations of life, piled on by social media, teachers and class. If you’re looking for a way to break free from it all, this addictive cut will help you.

8. ‘Can’t You See Me?’ (2020)

Even without watching the flame-filled music video for ‘Can’t You See Me?’, you can feel the scorching emotions that course through the song. Rather than showcasing them in the big rock anthemics that would come later in TXT’s journey, it’s the more seemingly subdued moments that sizzle here. “With resentment, my heart is heavy / ‘Cause you don’t understand me,” Beomgyu and Hueningkai murmur in the second verse, every ounce of that weight pouring through their words.

7. ‘Good Boy Gone Bad’ (2022)

On the lead track from 2022’s ‘minisode 2: Thursday’s Child’, TXT fully embrace the moment when it feels like you’ve hit an emotional rock bottom. Instead of wallowing in the misery, they make it their new super power – there’ll be no more “pathetic days” left on the calendar when you rise up with hearts “gone dead”. Set to searing rock, it’s become one of the most electrifying moments in the group’s concerts, not least Yeonjun’s bridge that ends in the laughter of someone truly cold-hearted and the declaration: “I like being bad.”

6. ‘Crown’ (2019)

The song that started it all. Tomorrow X Together’s debut single ushered in a boyband who sounded refreshingly bright but, beneath the bubbling synths, were dealing with the complicated growing pains of adolescence. Years on from its release, it still feels like a perfect snapshot of the dichotomy of youth – at once energetic, curious, self-doubting and concerned.

5. ‘Tinnitus (Wanna Be a Rock)’ (2023)

The boyband dabble in Afro-pop on this standout from ‘The Name Chapter: Temptation’. Despite its slinky rhythms that are practically a call to groove onto the dancefloor, lyrically it finds the group wanting to sink into a stillness caused by a crisis of confidence. “Rockstar minus the star / Just a rock, OK?” Taehyun sighs, preparing to descend.

4. ‘0X1=LOVESONG (You Know I Love You)’ (2021)

The moment TXT leaned all the way into the raw, serrated sensitivities of emo. With the help of featured singer Seori, ‘0X1=LOVESONG’ wears its feelings on its sleeve so viscerally it’s hard not to get swept up in its storm of emotion. Although the five-piece’s storyline would later disavow the need for connection, here it was still an essential, the group crying out for a loved one to “take my hand” and save them from being swallowed up by life.

3. ‘I’ll See You There Tomorrow’ (2024)

The concept of fate emerges on this sunkissed house jam, the beats forming a linking pattern between TXT and the person they believe is “meant to be”. ‘I’ll See You There Tomorrow’ is fresh and breezy, while its post-chorus refrain of “there’ll be no more sorrow, I’ll see you there tomorrow” could serve as a slogan for the comfort that spills out of the group’s catalogue.

2. ‘9 and Three Quarters (Run Away)’ (2019)

The title track of ‘The Dream Chapter: Magic’ more than lives up to the sorcery in the album’s title. Sprinkled with sparkling melodies that form the aural equivalent of the magic dust that accompanies wands casting spells in movies, the song captured the heart of much of TXT’s early storyline. It’s an ode to friendship and the feeling of finding people to run alongside you as you buckle up for the rollercoaster of life.

1. ‘Eternally’ (2020)

Tomorrow X Together have never been ones to shy away from trying something new, and that spirit quietly fuels ‘Eternally’, the stand-out track from ‘The Dream Chapter: Eternity’. What starts out as a gentle lullaby pleading soon morphs into something darker and prowling. The beat switch is tellingly signalled by a rapid-fire gunshot and the verse that follows feels like a villain origin story. That the group are able to pull off the revolving door of switch-ups on this track with such elegance is nothing short of impressively exhilarating.

[arkus-rhapsode]

Fire Emblem and Aesthetics-A Mini Discussion

So for those who don't know, I don't really play Fire Emblem Heroes, but I still have an interest in seeing what units they release. Usually for fanfic purposes or just keeping track of new resplendent designs. But recently, FEH had an update for the original character of Dagr and it got me thinking about how resplendent from jotunheim look

Combined with FEH's ongoing storyline of taking from Norse mythology it really made me think-"Wait, why don't we have a Norse Fire Emblem game?"

Now look, I'm not here to bemoan that FEH don't have a console version, non gacha style game, but it really got me thinking about how we may be missing out on something relating to the use of a rich mythology and it only being in a mobile game more about collecting waifus and husbandos.

You see, Fire Emblem is no stranger to cribbing from existing mythologies like Norse in Genealogy, Arthurian myth and the matters of France in Elibe, and several characters just straight up being named after mythological/classic literature characters like Beowulf, Sampson, Priam etc. But its always done in this relatively Anglo-Saxon-British-French homogeny of aesthetics for their tales. So we can have a character named Sigurd, but he's not gonna look like he's fresh off the Viking Ship. Now Fire Emblem isn't the only franchise to do this, many pieces of media made by other countries draw upon these sort of exaggerated/romanticized look for fantasy stories all the time. And I want to be clear I am not advocating for "Medieval accuracy," I think that's silly. What I'm more getting at is I feel like FE could do with changing up its setting/aesthetics to perhaps inspire newer experiences.

Now I'm not saying FE as a franchise needs to be reinvented. In fact, I think FE has one of the most universal accessible mechanics in turn-based gaming. Simple to pick up, but still able to create many difficult maps and challenges. And by this point has made the support system one of the most iconic in gaming. But if the mechanics are good, doesn't that mean it could be transplanted into another setting? Well, In a way, yes. But once again, I'm not advocating for FE to stop being this fantasy style sword and sorcery story and become like the Napoleonic wars.

(That is a real Nintendo game by the way. Its wild!)

No what I'm saying is that the broad terms of "Middle Ages Warfare" is much more than simply a certain type Eurocentric fantasy.

I'll tell you what, as much as people like to rip on Birthright, I'm still shocked how it took so long for Fire Emblem to have a game where Japanese culture and aesthetics is super prominent and a main setting for a game. Fire Emblem tends to have one character who is obviously inspired by Japanese culture or even sometimes a single country. But a full blown game where so many characters come from and embrace this Japanese backdrop was unique.

Now of course it was still Birthright, so while you got these cool glimpses of a unique world and story like the Oni inspired Flame Tribe, the start of having a lot of retainers as main characters, the monk class and using fans as a weapons, and even roping in Kitsune. It still doesn't really do much than an average FE adventure with them. But it did at lease prove the the FE formula *could* still work removed from its conventional trappings.

Another in the different aesthetic, but missed opportunity category would be Fire Emblem Three Houses country of Almyra being pretty heavily inspired by Persian/Middle Eastern culture. A country that was gesturing so hard at an interesting idea that its left fan artist and fanfic writers to swoon over the idea of a possible FE game set in Almyra.

And if you want an even more recent example, for all the desert backdrops we've had in Fire Emblem, its kinda astounding it wasn't until Engage that we got a lightly (And admittedly exaggerated) African inspired country.

When I see stuff like this and what FEH is doing it makes me realize that we could be getting more. Im sure the next FE will likely still lean on its typical fantastical Anglo-Saxon look, but eventually there's got to be some spice to it. Sure it may be different, but Fire Emblem is a franchise that with each entry does try to be something different while maintaining certain core gameplay elements. So what is the harm of trying to approach something that looks a bit different?

Im not asking for an extreme change right away. Maybe start lighter. We have tons of pirates in Fire Emblem, why not a pirate/sea based game? We've even had the rare few pirate as a playable character. Its a type of story that could be told within the typical Fire Emblem world.

Then perhaps maybe something a bit more culturally ubiquitous like Greeco-Roman inspired FE? There's plenty of gods and magic, but also swords and spears to draw forth on. Heck, that may even open up new potential enemies or stories to tell with like an Evil Senate or a Gladiator culture. It could even push FE to maybe drop or reinvent certain tropes like how they approach the knighthood type of character where a certain culture's version of knight is different. Maybe even make new classes the way Birthright had to.

Overall, I think Fire Emblem is and always has been a malleable franchise. And because of that, I think it can afford to take certain risks on something as simple as drawing from another culture during the medieval magic era, while still being able to provide things that people still love about the franchise like the combat system and support system. Will there be push back on it looking different? Of course, I remember when Three Houses first teasers dropped and everyone was wondering what was up with the military school outfits and what even race was Claude. And of course a different aesthetic doesn't make the game automatically good. But let's remember, that people were judgmental of Birthright not because it went all in on looking Japanese, but because the general story and writing was lackluster for many.

But if you can make an interesting and likable cast of a characters that elevate the story, and make a memorable world for people to wage war in, I see no reason why you couldn't make Fire Emblem work set in the Netherlands.

If there is a personal aesthetic or theme you'd like to see Fire Emblem tackle, sound off in the replies. I'd love to hear what you guys think.

[thinkin-bout-milgram]

Hello! If it’s okay, I’d like to know your thoughts on the Trikoto theory (3+ alters). I think it’s a cool theory! And pretty likely, honestly. (Here’s a document about it in case you don’t know what I’m talking about. I didn’t make it, and I unfortunately don’t know who did, I just found it in another blog)(I really hope that link works lol)

Hey FF! I was wondering when you might send something in. Not the topic I expected, but I'm here for it!

I've definitely heard of this theory before. I can't say I know for sure where it originated, but I've always been under the impression that a blog called @bertrandcaillet started it as they're the first one I saw talk about that theory and they told me about it a while ago. They've since deactivated, though, so I can't really check with them to see if that's true.

I think the trikoto theory is interesting, and I fully agree with what's said on the document about how it would be nice if Milgram is showing a system with more nuance than just having two alters.

That being said, I personally don't believe this theory for a number of reasons. I'm going to do my best to explain why here. I do want to say going into this that while I do have extremely minimal psychology teaching (as in, undergrad psyc MINOR), I do not claim to be that educated on DID or similar struggles. So, anything that I say will be focusing much more on Milgram as a piece of media from a writing standpoint, because that's what I have much more extensive experience in.

I will say that I am very aware that most systems have more than 2 alters. That being said, I think I also remember from my psyc class that the average number is, like... 16? I'm not at my dorm right now and that's where my notes are, so I can't check, but I remember specifically thinking about it in the context of Mikoto and trikoto theory, so I'm pretty confident it's Above Three. That means that either way, it's not like we're doing The Most Common Number, so I think two versus three is largely irrelevant on that point.

For the sake of clarity, I'll be using the names in the doc (Akakoto, Midokoto, Aokoto), but I only personally believe that two of them (Akakoto, Aokoto) exist. I've taken to calling them Orekoto and Bokuto, but for this post, Akakoto and Aokoto it is.

At its base, my problem with trikoto theory is that I don't see a lot of evidence for it. Most of what I've seen has been talking about the implications of it if you assume it's true, but I've just never really been convinced in the first place. I'll just go through some of the main reasonings real quick:

The RGB Colors

I do acknowledge that I'm very much not a visually oriented person, so the color shifting is something I'm less inclined to notice. However, while the background of the room is blue and the train station and apartment are pretty green, I don't feel like there are ever really any red backgrounds (other than when the headspace becomes red as ooposed to blue). Because of that, I have a hard time believing that the backgrounds themselves contribute to the idea that there are three. I definitely think the red/blue coloration in the eyes and such are indicating different alters, but I don't think that specific fact supports there being three of them.

The Voice Changes

This might be a me issue, but I only really hear two different vocal inflections. I understand the point about there being some harsher (?) sounding vocals that don't have the growl, but personally, I still think the tone matches the one described as Akakoto enough to count. Similarly, the parts towards the end that are picked out for Midokoto ("I'm probably not to blame," etc.) actually sound more like Aokoto to me even if I do try to track the three voices.

I'm hesitant to go too hard in believing the different voices because to me, doing so would severely limit the amount of control Natsuki Hanae would have over the emotions he wants to put into the song. The vocalists in Milgram do a fantastic job at using specific vocal intonations to convey deep layers of emotions in their songs. I feel like it would be very limiting to only be able to use certain vocal effects (ex. growl) in specific places due to the limitations of the characters. If there are two, the two voices are far more separate, which gives more space for customization within the bounds of each voice.

This is also a little bit iffier on evidence, but there's the Es cover of MeMe. I don't know how much Yurina Amami knows about Mikoto's story and the entire video is in grayscale, so take all of this with a grain of salt, but to me, I feel like Es uses two voices here, not three. Notably, they even have a bit of vocal growl on the "switch" and on "split and half, make that heart beat," which are both squarely in the Midokoto tone. They do still have the two voice split, sounding a bit more apathetic and aggressive in the Akakoto parts and cuter in the Aokoto parts. To me, that signifies that there's suppose to be two voices going on, not three, but you could argue that that's just Es' perception of Mikoto, so it's not decisive or anything.

Mikoto Fighting Es

Yes, in his first audio drama, Mikoto is able to beat Es up until Kotoko stops him. Yes, that's inconsistent from what we've seen from Futa and also t2 Amane. I agree that that's because the Milgram rules only apply to one or more alters, and thus any others that may exist can get around the rulings. We saw this between trials, too, with how Mikoto (seemingly Akakoto at the time) was able to avoid being restrained despite his guilty verdict, likely through the same loophole.

(Side note: this implies to me that Milgram's system for restraining guilty prisoners is, like the protective barrier around Es, somewhat magical and isn't a physical thing. Thus, if we were to, say, vote Amane as guilty, I am fairly confident she would be unable to harm any other prisoners, as we've already seen the barriers are able to prevent her from attacking others. I still lean Amane innocent anyways, but I wanted to point this out.)

Anyways, I don't think that this is actually evidence towards trikoto theory because it works perfectly fine with just the two of them. Aokoto is the prisoner in Milgram and Akakoto isn't. This doesn't necessarily mean that Aokoto is the one who was fronting while the murder happened, though; the rules of Milgram just necessitate that the prisoner is involved in/related to a death. It can be indirect.

I think that that's exactly what Milgram is asking us with Mikoto. The question is, how do you fairly hold a system accountable? Can you blame one alter for the other's actions?

Milgram loves to complicate these, and I can see the appeal of a complication being learning about a third alter. Personally, I think it's much more likely that the route Milgram is taking is looking at how much knowledge the alters have about each other and asking how much Aokoto would have to know to make him an accessory to Akakoto's murder plans. It could go either way, though.

Some Bonus Points

I think the strongest piece of evidence brought up is the use of threes in Mikoto's design. Other than "they just liked it aesthetically," there isn't much of a counterargument I can make about it. My best one would be that they might be going for a "switching between black and white" type of thing, which would work better with more stripes, but that's pretty weak. I also had the idea that the first character of his name looks like three stripes, which might be a better or worse explanation! You get to decide, I have no idea.

The cake sells me less, though. It's true that Kazui's is a perfect 50/50 and that Mikoto's isn't, but that's because they're representing different things.

Kazui's is half and half because his song is called half, and it could also be a sign of how he and his wife didn't actually connect more in a marriage sense; they're still two fully separate people rather than being a unit.

Mikoto, if he has two alters, is still physically one guy. Mikoto is mostly sitting on the flower designs. I'd argue that the flowers are meant to show Mikoto as a whole: the connection point of the two alters.

That's pretty much all of what I have to say on the doc (in terms of the trikoto aspect, whether I believe it or not there's some good work done in character/lyric analysis that applies to two or three alter theories), but I'll go over some of my reason for why I actively believe there to be two, because there are some reasons.

Reason 1: The Song Titles

The doc explains what the meaning of MeMe is in trikoto theory, but it definitely still works with two, more obviously so. That's not evidence, though, because the trikoto theory has a viable explanation too.

I have no idea what they'd be doing with the song title Double, though. I guess it would be a play on somebody being someone else's double, meaning they're someone like them, which is no doubt part of the song title either way, but I think it's difficult to ignore the meaning of Double that means, y'know... multiplied by 2, or:

But that could very easily be a diversion and we haven't seen the second video, so I'd let that slide. However, that brings me to the bigger problem:

Reason 2: Upright Versus Reversed

AKA, the tarot cards.

Tarot cards can be read two ways, Upright or Reversed, based on the orientation of the card when it's placed/picked up/whatever. I already went over in my original theory (which is pretty outdated, I could do a way better job but I wrote that one literally first out of my milgram thoeries and I hated not having a good name scheme for the various alters) why I believe Akakoto to be the Hanged Man (Upright) and why I believe Aokoto to be the Hanged Man (Reversed).

I struggle to imagine why the devs would pick tarot, something that clearly has two meanings to it, when there are actually three alters. Maybe it'd just be to throw us off the scent, but it feels a bit too intentional to me.

Plus, if it was meant to throw us off, I'd expect we'd get a different metaphor/symbol for the second MV (as we have been with pretty much everyone). However, the association between Mikoto and "reversible" things has continued into trial 2, even before his MV has come up.

I say this because of his trial 2 cover song: Reversible Campaign. Funnily enough, I actually thought this song would go to Kazui before it was announced as Mikoto's, but then I looked again and understood why they wanted it for Mikoto.

My thoughts get confused and fight with each other

Very Mikoto, works for either two or three alter theories. However:

I just want to waver between black and white

It's turned me upside down

There's more that seems to paint Mikoto's mind as a dichotomy, not a... trichotomy? Is that a word? I don't actually know.

The Song Lyrics of MeMe

This is sort of an extension of the above part, but there are also definitely song lyrics in MeMe that sound like they're heavily implying two. Again, you could argue that that's trying to throw us off the scent, but some of them are, in my opinion, actively difficult to justify for trikoto theory.

Split in half, Make that heart beat

I cannot for the life of me understand why any of the three alters would say "split in half" if there are three. I guess if any of them were aware of one of the other alters, but not the other? I don't think that's what was being argued, though, sorry if I missed that.

I’m already the fake one

Little harder to argue this one because I don't know how definite versus indefinite articles work in Japanese, but saying the fake one really sounds to me like there is one fake and one real. If you were just having a moment of existential crisis, in most situations, I think you'd opt for "I'm already fake."

The Mirror

This is sort of the same argument as the tarot cards, but there's also the use of mirror imagery in Mikoto's MeMe MV. Mirrors have two sides and are a reflection. You could use Haruka logic and say that it depicts self reflection, I guess, but considering the reflection acts differently, I think it's much more likely that this is meant to show the two alters.

Conclusion

Hopefully this all made sense? I respect trikoto theory and I could easily be super wrong about it (see also: my original opinions on gay Kazui theory and police Kazui theory), but I've just never really been sold. It's possible my opinion would change if I saw evidence that I felt worked better for trikoto than... twokoto? theory, but personally, I feel like most evidence I've seen for it is still better explained by there being two alters. Let me know what you think, though :)

[jimmyogames]

Katana ZERO and The Beauty of Stupid Premises

If you want to support me and my endeavors, please consider donating or subscribing to my Ko-fi! https://ko-fi.com/jcjimmy

*****

<Spoilers for Katana ZERO>

Katana ZERO is a game about a Vietnam War veteran former child soldier hopped up on MK Ultra time juice going around and cutting assholes down with a katana while wearing a bathrobe and sandals.

That sounds stupid, right? That is a stupid ass premise for anything, let alone a video game. Everything about that premise should reasonably clash against itself so hard that it collapses into a black hole.

And yet, Katana ZERO is one of my favorite games of all time. Didn't I just call it stupid, though? Yes, and I don't think it isn't stupid; but stupid does not mean dumb. Something can be stupid while still being clever, intelligent, and downright fucking gripping.

Because a premise is just that: a base idea upon which you build upward. You can make anything sound stupid when you strip it back to its foundation. Super Mario Bros. is a game about a fat, Italian plumber taking mushrooms to save a princess from a shitty Godzilla turtle. Disco Elysium is about an amnesiac cop who bumbles his way about a ghetto trying to piece together a murder mystery and not die of a heart attack in the process. Bloodborne is about some pinhead getting crunk off blood and, picking up a hacksaw, and going to war with a bunch of racist Londoners who turn into werewolves who turn into space aliens.

When you put things in such a manner, anything can seem utterly absurd — even the most grounded of fiction. As we all know, though, the reality is that these games are beloved. These games, which are built upon downright ridiculous concepts, are lauded as some of the most brilliant pieces of media ever conceived; and they work so well not in spite of their premises, but because of them.

No matter what idea you start with, it can always be made exceptional if it is well-thought out and carefully executed — which brings us back to Katana ZERO. Consider the premise I stated at the beginning of this post and ponder its individual elements. "Vietnam War veteran former child soldier hopped up on MK Ultra time juice"? How could anyone take that seriously? Well, the answer is that the game handles its characters and narrative in a way that presents them earnestly, without trying to lampshade or sidestep its innate absurdity. The main protagonist's past goes from appearing comedic on paper to being tragic when all the details actually unfold in the story. No part of "Vietnam War veteran former child soldier" is superfluous; they are each aspects of both the protagonist and the larger themes at play and are treated as if this was a retelling of an actual person's experiences.

The same is true for the rest of the premise. "MK Ultra time juice" is both a relevant story beat and one of the cruxes of the gameplay in Katana ZERO. As silly as it is to think about how the government shooting you up with hyper heroin can make your character slow down time, the way the game presents the issue turns it from nonsense to a striking commentary on drug use — and it does so while also weaving it into the gameplay without missing a beat!

This brings us to the last point in the premise: the fact that all of the aforementioned is true of a character who wields a katana instead of something more realistic, like a gun. Katanas have become a bit infamous over the years as the weapon of choice of people a little too invested in Japanese culture. It's to the point where when a lot of people hear mention of katanas, their minds go straight to scenes of sweaty neckbeards slicing up plastic bottles in their backyards. Thus, a game which revolves around a katana-user and his prolific master of dicing bodyguards like vegetables likely puts people off at first! Butchering hordes of enemies ninja-style is not only more fantastical than something akin to Call of Duty, but it's more comical too — at least in the eyes of many a modern person. How could something like this ever amount to more than Apple Store shovelware, let alone a masterpiece of narrative-gameplay marriage?

The answer, again, is sincerity — and confidence. Katana ZERO works not because it takes itself extremely seriously or attempts to play off the zaniness of its premise, but rather because it puts its foot forward without hesitation and without embarrassment. Katana ZERO dares to say "Yeah, you play as a junkie shinobi who uses time powers to turn bald dudes into confetti. You either accept that fact or fuck off." And it's because of that sincerity that it can wrap back around from being stupid to being captivating. When everyone stops trying to take games apart and boil them down to their ludicrous concepts, that's when you can become truly immersed in an experience — and Katana ZERO knows this. It knows this and invites you to leave your pretenses at the door. "Come on in," it says. "Let's cut some motherfuckers, shall we?"

Everything I've said applies universally, not just to Katana ZERO. Stupid premises stand out in the sea of realistic mediocrity that bubbles up from the dark depths of big business, whether it be in the movies industry, games industry, or what have you. The simple fact of the matter is that when you get stupid, you get creative. You leave behind the shackles of established norms and allow yourself to make something truly unfiltered. Something memorable. Something that, though it can be called ridiculous or absurd or whatever else, can hit you in the heart.

That's what makes Katana ZERO so good, and I invite all my fellow creatives to get stupid in turn.

[meggahamicide]

Do it have tips on how you draw? Preferable your comic strips? Speaking of, are you a self taught artist?

I am indeed mostly self taught, been drawing since probably before I could talk. Save for the things I learned through a few videos online and some art classes in school, I haven't really had anyone to teach me how to draw. With that being said, sometimes, I wish I was taught by someone else simply because they'd be able to point out that I was doing things the hard way.

Maybe one day I'll do some online classes or something.

As for your other questions, I don't actually have that much experience in comics save for a few pages here and there. I know you're looking for something technical, but I can't give you that right now (maybe ask me in a year, lol).

However, I do have something else I think is important to learn that it to me a while to really understand (even longer to put to practice). So with that in mind and putting myself at risk of sounding a little preachy:

Try not to be a perfectionist!

I often find myself stuck in a loop of never finding a piece good enough, of rendering and rendering until it becomes overworked and loses the spark that made it interesting in the first place. It's why I tend to lose sight of why I create: to have fun and spread my joy and passion for art with others.

Having the skill to correct poses, expressions, page layout, and everything that goes between comes with time and practice. Being able to see mistakes is a good thing, but it's always beneficial to remember that your human. Flaws are part of being a person and often times makes your art more interesting simply because of its imperfection.

Next: Take your time and be patient with yourself!

So much of today's social media is surrounded by comparisons and I am no saint in this; I fall right into rabbit holes of comparing my art with that of someone I admire. All that really does is make me hate my own stuff and the skills I've worked years to improve. It makes me see all the skills they have but I don't. It makes me think that I should be at the same advanced level as they are, but I forget, and I think a lot of other people do too, that we are all on our own art journey. Maybe you started drawing later than someone. Maybe you just don't pick up certain skills as fast as someone else. Maybe you're simply younger than someone else. Maybe you've been on a hiatus and you haven't drawn in a while.

No matter where you are in your journey, it's important to remember that you are your own person, you work at your own pace. Remember to take a look back on where you were a few years ago, remember that improvement is not always instant, that there are things you can't learn overnight. There are goals you have that are bound to be difficult to reach. You're going to get frustrated and impatient and it might make you want to give up altogether, but for every struggle, there is always the satisfaction of success in the end as long as you don't give up and give yourself the compassion and patience you deserve.

Geez, this turned out a lot longer than you probably wanted to ready and I'm sure it's not exactly what you were looking for, but it's what I had to offer.

But as proof of my overly dramatic rant, I give you a drawing I did in March of 2021 to a current Wip that I've been working on, over three years of progress:

[myobsessionsspace]

Fatigue

Kinda Random Thoughts a couple of days after the 'last BTS Live'

Ngl feeling a bit of mental and emotional fatigue.

I think it’s safe to say it’s going around.

The sad thing about social media is no matter how much you try and curate your own bubble with things that make you happy and positive people, it’s hard to maintain. Social media is a representation of everyday offline people. Regular people behind the usernames with their own opinions, experiences, likes and dislikes (celebrities are regular people too, just famous for something or talented and known for it).

Though it’s good for growth and maturity to not just surround yourself with the same opinions and thoughts as yourself, it’s also tiring when you feel the need just be understood. When you can never enjoy things in peace because others need more information, more context, need to pick apart, need to make their side seen, their conclusions/interpretations the decisive one.

Over the years we’ve had SEVERAL Jikook lives, OT7 lives or lives with some of the members as well as Jikook. I, like most of us, LOVE Jikook lives. When watched in its entirety we not only see their ‘moments’ but we see them as regular people, we then can discern the fake from true when we see fake subs, edits etc. What makes Jikook even more interesting and captivating, to me, is when I can see the similarities as well as the exceptions in their interactions with each other and their other members. I found Jikook AFTER I found BTS…

and not only do I love their lives with primarily the two of them, I also love their solo lives, their lives with other members and OT7 lives. All the members are interesting in their own ways and their lives shed light on them and the other members, Jikook included. Watching their lives (though still them putting their best face forward and always aware that they’re being watched by millions) is so much more rewarding than just watching edits, summaries etc from the likes of TikTok, YouTube and other platforms. It’s fun AFTER watching their lives to then see what army have done to have fun with them, such as funny edits, fake FUN subs etc.

**please please please, weverse is free, whenever you have the time, watch the lives there with the subtitles there, though not always the best, it’s better than those who may not translate for altruistic reasons**

It gets me down sometimes the constant need it seems, within fandom culture, to microanalyse every piece of content we get. We have the need to seek out hidden messages, hidden looks, put context behind what is and isn’t said. Give explanation where it isn’t needed and draw conclusions from what isn’t said.

Most of the time it’s cute, fun and ‘harmless’

But sometimes 😪

MANIPULATION, MISINFORMATION & MISTRANSLATION

Without agenda, edits, cuts, slow mo and with context & rightful subtitles - Original Weverse Source

It’s always been this way and sadly seems like it always will be. I like context, I like information, when possible I like to get it from the original source. It’s nice when busy and unable to read whole interviews or watch whole lives, to see little snippets and clips that float around online. But it’s so draining when those little clips and snippets are then used to paint different pictures and narratives depending on the sharer’s biases/intention. When it’s aimed at making members into villains, defaming their characters etc.

It’s rarely the case that the purpose for lives (when there is one) ends up being appreciated solely for that. Just the members wanting to connect with their fans.

mukbangs, karaokes, Legos, q&a’s, tmi’s, messages of thanks, birthday lives, just because lives. All the times they go on live that can be appreciated for just that end up being used as material for hate

Everytime it should be healing to interact with those we are fans of, after the initial wave of euphoria is over, undoubtedly what follows is soo much negative noise, new narratives, more hate etc.

As I said before I try to curate my timelines, who I follow, things I like & comment on etc but sometimes the need to correct misinformation, the need to defend the lies and negativity means I still end up seeing so much of the bad.

REAL (Weverse Original Source)

FAKE!

I know this is a cycle and I have choices and am not being forced to be anywhere.

It’s just one of those days where I want to word vomit on my blog.

I just want to enjoy BTS and Jikook peacefully and positively. Why can’t everyone want to do the same for their faves?? Why is it always so angry and combative and about winners and losers, horrible name calling and malicious lies, insults, nasty images etc. Why campaigns to cause mental anguish to members and their family? To sabotage and try to get members separated or even imprisoned. Why mass report playlists and accounts? Why when more often than not, it changes nothing.

If you don’t like something why spend so much energy on it? The members will still interact with each other, those that have ships & biases remain and Jikook will still be Jikook 💅

I know social media is a representation of the real world and that there are nasty people in the real world, so of course it makes sense that there are nasty people online, it’s just tiring and sucks the fun out.

They won’t stop me enjoying BTS’ music & content, them as individuals and a group nor will they stop me enjoying whatever Jikook chose to share with us,

but everyone once in a while it does mean I get social media fatigue, fandom fatigue and the need for me to do posts like this.

💜

Please use this post to share on the good things you like about the fandom, the group and BTS & Jikook online spaces. Let’s bring the positivity back for ourselves 💪

I hope anyone feeling like me can find what they need to keep on going in the fandom or make the move to take a break 💜

[kay0783]

I have some questions for those who are autistic/neurodivergent and have AHDH:

1) How long did it take for you to get diagnosed and

2)What advice would you give to those who believe they *might* be on the spectrum?

To put a long story short, one of my favorite animators on YouTube released a video talking about how she was diagnosed with AuDHD. I've always been a big fan of hers because I felt like I could relate to her, even though I could never pin point why. Once I watched the video and she explained all her symptoms/the way she functioned, I realized that (nearly) everything she spoke about is something I can relate to and struggle with.

I just want to clarify that in no way shape or form am I trying to "claim" having ADHD or autistic without any diagnosis. Ever since I realized I relate to the youtuber's overall functioning, I started doing some research and popped into some neurodivergent social media communities just to see what other peoples' lives were like with an official diagnosis. And 🥳surprise🥳... I once again found myself relating to a lot of experiences people were talking about.

What I've come across in some general research is that:

A) autism is caused by a genetic mutation + genetics (pls correct me if I'm wrong)

Genetic mutations run in my family and I even have a family member who suspects they are on the spectrum as well

B) Autism, specifically in women and girls, is often misdiagnosed as other disorders.

When I was 11 I was diagnosed with 8 mood disorders (a variety of anxiety and depression disorders), and vaguely remember a comment on some sort of platform that being diagnosed with an absurd amount of disorders is usually a sign that there is a much bigger, underlying issue at hand.

And C) not everyone with autism or AuDHD functions the same, yet there is not much research done on women with autism.

Again, I've read that there are many 'quirks' and ways in which neurodivergent people act, think, and speak. It's just kinda frustrating because my whole life I've been suffering with a mountain of other disorders and have had to be prescribed medications and go through a fuck tone of therapy sessions......all for something that doctors may not have picked up on, and misdiagnosed.

In no way do I mean to bash any medical professionals. I get that there's not a lot of understanding of what autism is like in other groups other than white, cis males (again, no offense, it's just what I've read). For crying out loud, my own mother worked YEARS as a special Ed teacher for students with down syndrome and are extreme cases of autism, but that kinda adds to my frustration because if she never noticed anything, then am I making this all up??? Am I losing my mind??? It sure feels like it. But at the same time it doesn't because when I read posts from people with autism and ADHD, so many things start piecing themselves together and just. make. sense. Idk how to word it. I do so many things that make it hard to function day-to-day, and when I listen to others like me, I feel seen and heard for the first time. For the first time I'm thinking that I might not be crazy.

So, long story (not so) short, is it worth me looking into getting an assessment? What if the medical professionals don't believe me? How long does it take to get a diagnosis?

(If there are any medical professionals out there who are willing and able to give some advice, please feel free to comment).