#| should i stay or should i go | queue
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😊 - It makes me happy to see you on my dashboard!
💙 - I love your muses!
💜 - I love you, the mun!
🤎 - Your characters are well developed and deserve more love!
💞 - I’m glad we are friends!
#*U GIVE ME TOO MUCH LOVE#*;_;#familybyerstm#| ooc | sammy talks#| positive vibies |#| should i stay or should i go | queue
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is it me or is everyone on this website so fucking miserable about everything these days. about every show every movie every book every musician/band every post regarding social issues every art piece. actually not even just on this website on all social media type platforms. the sheer amount of posts/youtube videos i see titled “x is bad and here’s why”. y’all talk about people/problems that have never even remotely crossed my mind as a possibility of existing like it’s plaguing the earth as we speak. things that people act like are major problems in [x fandom] or whatever that i’ve straight up just never seen before. in circles i’m active in. not even in a “let people enjoy things!!!” type of way. just why are you so hung up on something minor clearly making you so upset. i’m a guy who loves to fight but like why are we fighting when it’s not even fun for either of us. and you know what i’m probably guilty of this too at this point but jesus christ. whatever. can we all just sit outside in the park and smoke a blunt and chill out like we used to.
#talking to myself#says the guy who picks fights over any opinion she disagrees with#everyone should agree with me all the time about everything then we can all be happy i think ❤️#when the mcr/fob fan fighting was at its worst the amount of times i wanted to just post ‘you are all so fucking miserable ❤️ god bless’#LIKE WHO WAS FIGHTING. I NEVER EVEN SAW ANYONE FIGHTING JUST PEOPLE COMPLAINING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE FIGHTING AND BLAMING IT ON THE OTHER SIDE#like i love this website it’s my last little corner of the internet that still feels fun for the most part#and i WANT it to stay fun. but my god.#and normally i’d be like ‘oh i’ll just unfollow some people’ BUT ITS NOT JUST SOME PEOPLE ANYMORE#again whatever i am in new orleans i am going to chug this hand grenade and throw this in my queue and forget about it
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hi. for people who saw gatsby: an american myth. do you remember mckee asking nick for lunch. and then gatsby in like the next scene inviting nick for lunch. because i remember.
#not pjo#chitter chatter#when gatsby was like 'we should do lunch' i was like. hello. fucking. hello. are we. hello.#gatsby really said we just met literally 5 minutes ago. come meet my father figure. normal normal thing to do jay.#to be clear gatsby also asks him to go to lunch in the book. but like. there's a time skip. and also#in the show after mckee asks they immediately start making out on the couch. none of this ... nonsense#so the vibes are a LITTLE different in my brain.#i saw a few people say they didnt think gatsby and nick flirted enough and like while i do think that think part of it is we're#in nick's pov but not his HEAD#he DOES start singing about gatsby's smile for no reason until jordon is like. alright buddy. lets talk about daisy.#like nick was just Doing That. pull it together carraway.#but i got the vibe (JUST my take) that gatsby was like. kinda into nick. zero reason to be leaning into his space like that sir.#however when he actually MET daisy again he became kinda singularly focused on her again#i mean he built his whole lifeup to this moment#he says it at the end. he murdered pieces of himself to bring himself here. for DAISY.#him snapping back to daisy mode makes sense to me but he still reaches out for nick as a comfort in the sense that hes like#nick do NOT leave please stay with us. daisy does the same. and ofc part is that theyre really. fucking awkward. but like.#LET ME HAVE MY OWN NONSENSE INTERPRETATIONS. HES TRAPPED BY WHITENESS AND CLASS AND HETEROSEXUALITY.#hes already so much of an outsider trying to fit in. (i also think he loves daisy or an ideal at least. and she's EASIER to love. safer.)#nick inherently has more freedom even as a gay man in the sense that hes richer and white and an ivy league dude i mean you understand righ#right????????#even if its in the book i do wanna point out the parallels between those moments. im choosing to see it as deeply intentional <3#this show had a lot of repetition and parallels (see daisy and myrtle in a lot of songs and scenes)#(one i LOVE is tom giving myrtle a necklace and daisy later giving TOM her necklace in case he sees anyone he knows. idk love that shit)#im...gonna queue this#im embarrassed to talk about this show so much. so. into the queue it goes!!!#all the worlds a stage#so like. anyway. thats where i think nick's mind immediately went when gastsby asked him for lunch. personal headcanon <3#gatsby after one convo: we're doing lunch // me and nick immediately: oh ok! guess that's a date then!
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OH MY GOD
#40 BIOGRAPHIES?!#I'm not going to be normal after reading the Ingeborg of Norway chapter#and so many others!!!!!#scandinavian history#history media#October seems so far away now...#(and it should stay far away because I have to submit my post-grad applications during that time. but still!!!)#queue
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tbc these are the notes for a gifset of a show i dont watch, but fans barely interact w/ the works of creators like this and wonder why there ends up being a dearth of fandom activity and dwindling sense of community, assuming that energy picks up at all to begin w/.
#FTR its smthn im always trying to be better about myself (my bad habit is liking things to come back to later)#so im trying to queue things as much as possible even if i dont have time/cant bother to tag it properly#i dont fux w the 'you should rb!!' shaming PSAs either but its just wild to me?? 1K likes and <300 rbs?#like i've not rbed posts bc op was like “reblogs>likes!” in the caption and that's just straight-up Off-Putting#but i blabbed abt this yday like i *stayed* in a fandom and met my gf *thru* said fandom *bc* she left nice tags on my art#like no one has to go that extra mile but a rb goes a long way but damn!! 300 to 1000 huh! man.#i think IG/TT and people just binging shows contributed to this a lot. maybe it's rose-colored glasses bc i remember the ratios were more#leveled 10+ years ago#xantalks
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okay my boss has FINALLY agreed to raise my salary
it's really not by much :/ but it's better than nothing
#i'm so so conflicted whether I should stay in the company or whether I should leave#the timings are very convenient and i get to work from home for now because they're redoing the office#but the money isn't great. but I'm living with my parents for now so it's not as necessary#I'm also planning on going abroad for my masters (iirc I might be applicable for a great scholarship and I'm really keen on it)#and may stay there if the opportunities are good (and i'm sure they'll be better than here lol).#so whatever job I do is gonna be temporary in any case#idk#queue
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this turned into a vent post 🧍
like
it's not like I'm not used to be the person that constantly gets left out of what goes on
mainly because I'm bad at reading cues, and I don't like to hang out much, or party, or videocall (or be around more than one person. and I need to really really feel comfortable with them)
but i still try to put in the effort and be a good friend and stuff. I always offer my help, or to listen when people need to vent or have a problem, and to hype their accomplishments and be interested in what they find interesting
but that's apparently not enough for other people to put in the effort for me y'know? I don't think it's malicious of them, only that, "oh it's v they won't care" "they'll say no anyways". and in some ways that's true. I don't mind that I can't talk about my shit with them because I have my writblr in here. and yes it stings to find out through social media that they met up without asking me, but I'm used to it and it's not that big of a deal for me.
it ends up being a vicious cycle because I won't share things because they won't care about it, and they won't care about what I have to say because I never say anything at all
this still isn't the reason why I started writing this but oh well
i guess this specific thing triggered it all, because everything else are just little things that pile up over time. but this is concrete and easily comparable. and the differences are harsh
and it does hurt
#brain it's been 4 weeks maybe let it go already#← will stay salty about it all#the og post i made is still rotting on the queue because i have almost 300 posts in there#but Things Happened and now i wanna complain in real time#vent post#i guess#should i communicate all of this?#yes certainly#but I don't want to appear petty#and it's not like it can be fixed#or that they will really care#like 'oh sorry that happened v'#and then onto the other and most important big thing#not p qost
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Turns out, brute-forcing it still works, especially if you're Giovanni. The Kanto VA rerun makes so much sense now.
There's really not a lot of strategy here, just steamroll it. Giovanni can make a quick work of Terrakion, especially assisted by Bianca, and Sycamore can take +6 Attack Sacred Sword from full health without defensive buffs, and he still has 1/3 health. Though, quad-queueing helps to accelerate the battle faster. Giovanni survived the Bar 3 Sure Crit Earthquake only because of his Psychic gears and matching theme skills with Bianca. Still recommended to take the Endurance grid.
Oh yeah, I think proc-ing at least 1 MPR of Psychic Terrain is better so Bar 1 don't take too long to take down. 1 Psychic Terrain for each HP bar.
#personal#pokemon masters#well now i know what team i'm gonna use if terrakion is gonna be added into gauntlet#by that i mean please don't#giovanni stays winning#when i failed quad queueing at bar 3 i thought 'oh gio is gonna go down'#and was surprised that he survived somehow#and when terrakion used sacred sword i thought sycamore's gonna go down#he doesn't#this team is full of surprises#i should call this team 'live dangerously'#also hey finally making use of that power reserves i guess#22k damage of psychic there
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I mean like. Not to bring the mood down but... you guys know that's because American media is everywhere right? Like the world is unable to avoid some version of American accent on a regular basis. Of course ppl find it easy to mimic. This is absolutely not restricted to ppl in the UK, its really common for ppl who learn English as a foreign language to have perfect 'American actor' accents (cause the reason everyone's so good at the American accent that's expected of them as actors is cause at large there's little distinction between regions in the 'Hollywood accent' that ends up on TV and films and stuff. You guys have massive regional differences in pronounceation, but what makes it on to TV (in 9/10 cases) is a very standardised version of American English.)
But yeah. It's not just actors lol. Most British ppl can speak in a passable american accent, as can loads and loads of people worldwide. I'm not saying this to be like 'you should feel guilty! 😡' but it does always stun me when Americans are unaware of the impact their country has worldwide on all versions of English (and even on use of native languages. Many countries are using English more and more over their native languages and dialects , and yeah, historical colonialism has had an impact there.)
But in the last few decades things have progressed way way faster and that, is thanks to the impact of anglo/american/ect lead capitalism. I'm in no way dismissing the impact the UK has on this, but in recent years, its the US that is largely pushing that train .While the UK and several English speaking commonwealth countries are very involved in this kind of capitalist imperialism, there's a reason that more and more people are speaking American English. Not one of the many UK dialects, not Australian English, or NZ English. Across the world more and more people are increasingly speaking in the same standardised american dialect that's in so much of the media you export. Hollywood based media, with that standardised accent/ dialect and the standardised 'normal american life', has a stranglehold on the world and I just find it crazy that a lot of you guys don't even know.
It's stupid stuff like. So many countries are importing american cars and are widening their roads/ changing town planning to account for it (this is less of a thing in the UK but I see it more and more when I travel). Its the food becoming avaliable everywhere. Its the influence that for profit healthcare has even on countries with socialised health systems. Its houses being built to account for American style appliances. Fashion trends. Worldwide, everything is slowly evolving to be closer and closer to this 'American standard' which honestly? I really don't think actually represents the lives of real American people either. You've been turned in to products, the system has taken an unrealistic snapshot of 'American life' and it's being sold to you all day in day out, but it's also being sold to the rest of us. It's being pushed on us all.
Kids in the UK go through phases of talking only in American accents. Anyone born later than the 90s is carrying round 2 sets of spelling and vocab, cause we're all so used to the American way, that you barely know which one you're using half of the time. In the UK we have always had really strong regional accents yeah, and dialects differ between areas that seem tiny to you guys, I know. But like. Those dialects are being lost cause all UK accents are evolving to become closer to this standardised american and yeah not great, but at least we share a language! US American society is largely rooted in the same foundations as UK society, largely we have the same flaws! But oh my god. What about the rest of the world.
It's global. This impact continues to be seen, steamrollering ahead, in places that had completely different starting points. UK culture isn't that dissimilar to that of the US, so we aren't losing nearly as much as cultures that had something completely different. So much is being lost.
Languages and dialects and everything else is just being wallpapered over so we all meet the same ideal of the 'American life' and it's not even real! It's just a product based on how ppl were actually living in the US, manipulated until it's the most marketable mould. You guys are victims of it as well but like. It's based on your culture so you don't lose as much if you conform to it. Just like how in the UK, if we conform, we lose more than US, but nowhere near as much as countries that had languages, dialects and cultures that were so so different to UK/US culture. The less like the US, your starting point, the more there is to lose.
And look. I said it to start with. I'm not having a go. That's not what this is. But you guys really need to be aware, you need to make an effort to understand the impact that this plastic Hollywood american culture is having on the rest of the world. You need to actively look for it, and make an effort to not pay in to it. Because when Americans see other cultures represented in media and say its not relatable, when you guys go on holiday and make no effort to learn local customs, and try and pay in dollars and spend your time abroad like you're still in America, when you see cultural differences and immediately argue that the American way is better and of course everyone should have giant cars and never dry laundry outdoors and live in American style homes, without any kind of critical thought. Just 'this is how we do it so why wouldn't everyone else do it this way. This is the only way. The American way is obviously best.' When you guys do that you are individually feeding in to this absolute bulldozing of cultures (including American ones!) to allow for better marketability.
It isn't any one individual American citizens fault that things are the way they are, and you guys are victims of the same system, but you need to have some self awareness when it comes to the fact that as individuals you are unknowingly, helping driving this forwards and as individuals, there are things you can do to limit your personal impact (and no arguing that you have no culture is not it!!! Being all self deprecating doesn't do shit. Take some responsibility and accept that individual Americans didn't create this system, but currently, individual Americans really are doing their bit to keep promoting it, to keep pushing it on the rest of the world.
And I've already rambled for an age so I'll stop here but I just want to make clear as an ending note here, that this really isn't about piling on Americans and being all 'boo it's all America's fault. They should apologise. Their culture isn't worth anything.' Not at all this is the opposite of that. The fact that millions of Americans have been convinced you have no culture, all while a mimicry of American culture is plastered on to the rest of the world, and while you as individuals are encouraged to help that happen, often without even realising what you're doing; is a crime. You've been wronged, as have we all.
And America is not the problem. The problem is imperialism and it didn't start with you guys. It started in Europe, and Europeans, particularly British ppl, have a responsibility to push back and be self aware, take some fucking responsibility and not inadvertently keep feeding in to that system, just as you guys do. The US didn't start the fire, imperialist capitalism is a fire that started burning long before the United States was even considered, but its on all of us, to do what we can to not feed that fire. And right now? You guys are the face of it.
This idea of what America is, is the face of imperialistic capitalism, and that means that even if you don't mean to, you guys are feeding that fire more so than the rest of us. You're responsible for spreading it, more so than the rest of us. And if you don't step up and take responsibility, accept that you're gonna get it wrong sometimes and you need to try to do better; if we don't all do that. There will be nothing left. They'll paper over it all, the lives of real Americans just as much as those in Scotland and India and the Netherlands, and 100 other cultures, that are at risk, thanks to this fire, that's currently, largely coming from America.
So yeah. It's absolutely not just on you guys and ppl who act like there's no racism or wealth divide in Europe or anywhere else for that matter are complete idiots, however, this Americanisation of the world (and I hesitate to call it that. Because its not a representation of real American lives. Its simply wearing an American face.) Its real. It's happening.
And we don't tell you about it to make you feel guilty (those of us who aren't dicks at least) ,we are telling you. We are kicking up a fuss. Because it isn't fair. It's not right and while individual Americans ignore that and refuse to take responsibility where they can (small apples. We aren't asking for you to call a violent revolution in our names. Just take some time to learn about the rest of the world. Stop assuming America is always right and examine your biases. When you find them. Stop personally pushing them.) , while that is happening, as individuals, you are contributing to this. It's not even altruism. This system is hurting Americans too. It's hurting us all. All we ask is that you do what you can to not personally contribute, and keep an open mind, be aware. That's all any of us can do.
when a british actor does an american accent everyone’s like “i didn’t even know they were british until they were on colbert.” but when americans do a british accent everyone’s like “they’re supposed to be from east cocksford but their glottal e’s are north dicksford. shameful.”
#so yeah sorry to rant but honestly#I'm so tired of ppl refusing to take responsibility on every side of this#imperalistic cruel capitalist regimes going 'well hey. at least we aren't America. this is their fault.'#meanwhile. Americans contribute to the bulldozing of their own cultures to make room for a capitalist monster wearing them as a mask#and if you call out any Americans or make them aware of something they are doing individually that isn't helping. it's either#refusing to see/ accept their own bias. or just as bad! yes! just as bad!!! america is beyond help. there's nothing worth saving#nothing we can do. that's bullshit and making stupid excuses like 'oh our schools don't teach us to respect other cultures'#'we don't know how.' fucking learn! try! that's all anyone asks of you. nobody cares about your schooling. school is shit for working class#ppl in most countries!#you think the english curriculum is any more balanced? we're subjects of a colonial empire. it's propaganda and its not even competent!#i don't think the average American understands how many more hours of schooling they get vs a lot of places. I'm not saying it's right#but teaching time? you guys have longer school days and you stay in school till youre older. our national curriculum ends the year we turn#16 in the UK. year 11 finishes in June. you can leave school 2 months shy of 16 to get a supermarket job. (and many working class ppl do)#and our government still pat themselves on the back and say its eqv. to high school finishing at 18 in other countries. like for context.#i haven't had a geography lesson since i was 13. my last english lesson? i was 15. that's completely normal here. so yeah. the#'our schooling was shit so we can't use Google to learn a bit of geography' falls pretty fucking flat. sorry.#they should have done better by you but they didn't. join the queue. do what you can and take some fucking responsibility now#the only way out of this is for us all. American and otherwise. to do what we can. be self aware. try to be better. keep learning#because if you fall to apathy? capitalism wins. if you believe the propaganda? capitalism wins. if capitalism wins we all lose#the system is designed to wear you down so you're too tired to remember that it doesn't have to be this way.#that's been happening for decades and it's why things are such a mess now. the only way out. is remember there is a way out#climb towards it. do what you can. it seems like low hanging fruit. it doesn't look like enough to change anything.#but there are more ppl being hurt by this system than those benefiting. 99% of us. if everyone picks an apple. that's a lot!#that's a fucking lot! keep going even when it seems like you aren't making progress. make your voice heard. vote. don't passively support a#system that's on its way to destroying you. destroying us all. do what you've got to do to live. but don't forget that all the things that#seem like they don't matter? really really do matter once you add up everyone's contributions. you can't control other ppls actions only#your own. but your contribution matters. your vote matters. your voice matters. join the union. educate yourself. stay curious. question.#the informations out there go online learning 1 thing. challenging 1 bias is better than all or nothing. i dont have time to learn anything#small apples. low hanging fruit. the oceans made up of billions of drops. the longer you don't try. the longer you've no chance of success#we can do better. we can absolutely all do better.
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✏️✏️✏️✏️
Send ✏️ if you like my writing
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Saw a video of someone drawing a more realistic style and thought I'd give it a shot myself with Paris (who happens to be my artstyle guinea pig atm lol 👉👈)
Im ngl my knowledge of anatomy is nonexistent but it think this turned out okay! This didnt turn out looking as realistic as i was aiming for but i sort of got the effect i was going for so that counts!!
#TME#TME art#Paris Valerian#im so inconsistent with these tags#into the queue this goes owo#i LOVE drawing TME's characters so much waaaah#im going to keep posting TME fanart thingies and probably fanfics on AO3 whenever i get the time to sit down and draw/write#so i dont have a schedule for posts but i promise ill make more TME fanart!#it's so funny how i feel more confident drawing Paris than I do Helene#also ik i keep fucking up on Paris's eyes but i legitimately keep forgetting to change his eye shape when i draw it#the eyes should curve downwards instead of upwards and yet i keep defaulting to my typical way i draw eyes#he's got a funny kind of half-lidded look to his eyes in the manhwa that makes him feel soft and thoughtful yet kind of dumb#and idk i really appreciate how his eye shape helps sell the way he's rarely truly interested in things bc it's relatable af#Paris absolutely clicks with me as a character and the amount of cognitive dissonance i feel towards him bc of it is really funny to me#anyways my eyes are watering from staying up too long so into queue this goes~
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Remember when Brodie Grundy and Tim Broomhead were broommates
#i want to be a broommate#goals#Tim's in Albury now and Brodie's in Sydney#do you think Brodie takes trips down in his caravan to see Tim#he walks into Albury and there's a huge billboard with Tim broomhead on it#in the town square there's a statue of Tim#Brodie just like 'oh my god is Tim the mayor of Albury?'#asks the locals about Tim and they all gush about his heroic feats#holding up the queue at the grocery store because he asked the cashier about Tim and people push their trolleys over to join in#they live in a mansion on the hill#Brodie is worried that Tim's moved on and is so popular now that he's forgotten his old broommate#Brodie nervously knocks on Tim's door and Luka answers like 'daddy there's a strange man here'#'Luka finish your caviar I'll get it' Tim says as he comes into the foyer and he sees who's at the door#'it's me' Brodie says hope spreading through his limbs that Tim hasn't forgotten him#'Brodie' Tim says amazed 'come in'#shows Brodie around the mansion where there's a bedroom for each child plus a room for every cat#dea steps from the kitchen 'hey i was just in the middle of a Belgian feast Brodie stay for dinner'#'oh i really should get going---' Brodie starts and dea looks at her boyfriend 'have you shown him the basement yet?'#Tim blushes shyly and shakes his head#'oh what's in the basement?' Brodie asks intrigued 'is that the wine collection?'#dea pushes Tim toward the basement stairs and he cautiously descends into the basement Brodie following#Tim waits until Brodie is standing next to him in the darkened basement then flicks on the light#The room illuminates and reveals framed Grundy portraits on the walls and every newspaper clipping ever written about Brodie Grundy and#everything shining and polished and gleaming and 'i come down here to polish it all every day' tim boasts#'what's that?' Brodie points to an old dusty couch in the middle of the room#'sometimes i come down here and sit there and just think' Tim says 'it's our old couch from our broommate days'#'when we'd sit together and discuss the world's problems' Brodie reminisced wistfully#'it's beautiful' Brodie said walking throughout the room and gazing at all his paraphernalia with his name on it#'I even had a Brodie Grundy inspired chess set made' Tim said gesturing to the porcelain pieces on the coffee table#'awww you changed the chess pieces to incorporate my ideas for them!' Brodie cried picking up the two kings
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i don't know if i could EVER part HIM I mean, Just thinking about it tears through my brain like PAPER IN A SHREDDER I'm stone cold at a memorial thing 4 my late uncle but I think about losing HIM & tears start coming because he just fucking. Like how the fuck am I gonna do this i just wanna start ripping at my flesh & muscle because thinking about leaving him gives me the feeling that something is writhing under my skin I just wanna tear it out & make it stop ^^^^^^^^^ I imagine a world without both of my darlings & i think i would just k#(*%(^ll myself!!!!!!!!!!
#cw sui#]]H0K0#QUEUE#08/02/23#GL00MY . . .#struggling 2 front cuz im just messing it up so bad !!!!#but a lot of us HIM!! its not just me so im not the problem!!!!!!!#trust me if it was just that id have myself skewered by now#the whole point was HE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ME#I CANT LEAVE HIM#THATS THE WHOLE POINT I CANT DEAL WITH PEOPLE LEAVING ME ANYMORE#its hwy i have this stupid fucking illness bpd i hate it I HATE IT I HATE IT#cuz it just makes everything WORSE#i claw at people wanting them to stay but it scares them away or i HURT them enough to make them go away#it fuck ing sucks i wanna crack my head open like an egg & slice my brain in half like a loaf of bread#im genuinely wondering if i should continue. like. idk if its worth it#whatrver i wont go too in depth in that#but im sort of obsessed with having a goodbye letter but i think thats primarily a me (hoko) thing#i also really care about the date but idk if i could wait for our anniv or his bday
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✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄ blessings ⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧
↬ summary: nanami kento tries to be the perfect husband and father but when a tough night fighting curses ends badly it results in nanami snapping at his daughter.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ minors / ageless / blank blogs (dni) ↬・tags: nanami x female reader; hurt/comfort; nanami has a daughter; domestic drama; being a jujutsu sorcerer is hard; momotarō is a famous Japanese folk tale :c ↬・ wc: 3,383
↬ notes: hi, everyone! I'm currently not really active at the moment so please don't feel disheartened if I haven't been responding to your messages or tagged posts. I'm taking a small break and only coming online for a bit to catch up on some messages, read fics or queue posts. I'll be back to properly posting and interacting soon but in the meantime I wanted to share that I finished up this draft over the weekend. I was actually debating if I should post this but then just decided to go for it! sending all my love xx
nanami’s head is heavy, completely clouded with despair, and it tints his brown eyes a shade of murky gray. the walls of his beautiful home feel narrow, almost claustrophobic, which explains why he’s struggling to catch his breath right now. stepping into the hallway, he instinctively peeks into the dining area to find you and his daughter eating dinner together. she’s sitting on the chair, her legs far too short to even touch the ground, holding a half eaten onigiri between her small hands. you are by her side, sneakily tidying up after her as you brush away the stray beads of rice trickling onto the table.
a little glow blooms in nanami’s heart at the sight of you both but there is a vicious creature residing in the pit of his stomach that veils the bright light away.
he quietly takes off his jacket, his bruised fingers loosening the tie around his neck. he clears his throat before announcing with exhaustion to you both that he’s finally home.
your eyes meet his, the muscles on your face falling immediately. he can practically feel the blood rushing through your veins as worry washes over you. the reaction makes his chest uncomfortably tight, but he knows that he can’t hide his expressions around you like he used to.
you both move together so fluidly now, like a single body of water that ebbs and flows to its own natural current.
he escaped the night’s fight with a few cuts and a couple of bad bruises, but there is currently a student on shoko’s table who barely made it through. the young man arrived at jujutsu tech only a couple of weeks ago, but his naive and charismatic qualities turned into fatal flaws in the world of sorcery.
he bit off more than he could chew by trying to take on a special grade curse.
shoko promised nanami that she would heal the boy, but admitted there was only so much she can do in regards to the aftermath of his injuries. the sorcerer couldn’t bare to leave him behind, but gojo refused that he stay and insisted that he return back home to his pretty wife and adorable daughter immediately.
“I’ll handle things from here,” is what his superior said, while nanami’s guilt climbed up his throat.
that student was his responsibility...
...and he failed him entirely.
“papa’s home!” his daughter chirps. the pitch of her voice ringing in nanami’s ears to pull him back to the present and far away from the scene where life and death were dancing together in a tango. “papa, look, look...mama and I made onigiri!”
her feet bounces up and down, and there’s a touch of a pink against her cheeks when her mouth stretches into a beaming grin. the innocence in her eyes makes nanami falter and he can feel himself falling deeper into the abyss. for a minute he resents himself for selfishly bringing such a beautiful thing into this world, only to gamble with the fact that she may potentially be in his shoes one day.
he begs for that outcome to never happen, beseeches whatever higher power above him that exists to spare her from this life. she should never have to go through this, never have to experience these heartbreaks that only wither a person down.
“I can see that,” nanami replies in a low voice before shifting his attention to his feet.
right now, he can’t stomach an ounce of her purity, and it radiates around her like a halo. she's so unbothered by his presence, so completely unaware of the sudden change in the atmosphere around her...
“we made tuna, salmon, and veggies...” she babbles on.
“how nice...” nanami curtly interrupts, before anxiously running his fingers through the strands of his messy blonde hair.
“which one do you want, papa?” she questions eagerly, pointing her sticky hands at the plate to show off the selection of triangles.
“sweets,” you interject just as nanami turns on his heel to walk in the other direction, “how about we finish up eating our dinner, and we can save some for your daddy tomorrow...”
“nooo!” she whines far too loudly, which forces nanami to stop dead in his tracks. he glances over his shoulder to see her puffing out her bottom lip with disappointment, “you said...you said we make it so we eat together!”
she’s only six.
she can’t perceive that her father is struggling to hold himself together. deep down inside nanami knows that, but it isn’t enough to keep his cool. he doesn’t know why his daughter’s insistence causes him to pinch the front of his brows with annoyance or why he shoots a frustrated look in her direction.
he doesn’t know why he’s suddenly picturing shoko calling the student’s parents to deliver the news that the man who was supposed to protect their child was unsuccessful in his duty.
he doesn’t know why he feels at fault for everything that happened, even though the circumstances of the events were completely out of his control.
he doesn’t know why he’s imagining himself on the receiving end of a very similar call, or why he can’t stop picturing his precious daughter on that table instead…
all of this pummels into him, and the monster emerges out from it’s cave.
“be quiet and stop making such a fuss.”
his voice comes out sharper than expected, and the expulsion of his frustration allows him to see the crystal clear picture before him.
the room is dead silent.
your face is in full shock at the hissing tone of your sweet husband snapping at his darling baby girl who he only ever speaks to with a gentle voice.
what truly unravels nanami is the look that his daughter is giving him - her angelic features are sullen, but her eyes remain wide with surprise. her bottom lip is slack, and the only sound he can hear is her uneasy breathing. her eyes, the most beautiful gems in existence, twinkle as tears begin to form and she tries to quickly blink them away before turning her attention back to her plate.
nanami doesn’t know he managed to stop time itself but the three of you remain frozen in place.
he regrets his words immediately.
he wants nothing more than to pull his precious girl close into his chest and smother her with apologies. the part of him with sense tells him to follow through and make things right with her, but instead he begrudgingly continues to wallow in his own self pity as he walks over to his room.
・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・
the house is unusually quiet now, the music of domestic joy morphing into hushed murmurs and whispers outside your room door. you settle your crestfallen daughter into her bedroom before moving to check on your husband next.
fresh out of the shower, nanami is seated on the edge of the bed with his exhausted eyes pressed firmly into the palms of his hands. he exhales a heavy breath, his dirty work clothes still piled just outside the bathroom, and your heart nearly collapses seeing him in such a state of disarray.
you kneel before him, two hands sliding across the soft material of his sweats as you brush them along his thighs before carefully bringing them up to circle around his wrists.
“kento?”
he allows you to pull his palms away but your throat constricts when a band forms tightly around your neck. you swallow the lump with an upturn of your brows as you are greeted with red, exhausted eyes. you cup that handsome face in your hands, your thumbs sweetly motioning back and forth across his cheeks as you try to soothe the tension away.
after all this time together, it hurts you to see that he still tries to hide his tears. nanami constantly holds himself to the highest standard, always ensuring that he can solidify himself as the rock for you and your daughter to depend on through thick and thin. it’s so rare for you to see him crack, to watch him crumble under the overbearing weight of the things that he is burdened to carry.
“you had a rough night,” you point out in a low, sympathetic voice and he simply just nods his head in acknowledgement.
his eyes flutter close again when you lean forward to press a tender, reassuring kiss on his brow. “you want a talk about it?”
the way his voice shakes makes you shiver, but you tentatively listen as he relays the events of the night before finally concluding that satoru called him only a few minutes ago to reassure him that the student in question is alright.
“he lost an eye, but at least he’s alive...” he concludes somberly, the warble in his final statement prompting you to wrap your arms around his neck as you pull him in for a protective hug.
nanami receives it with gratitude, strong arms circling around your waist as he buries his nose into the crook of your shoulder and breathes in.
your scent is a reminder of his permanent sanctuary.
a safety, a reassurance of home.
you stroke his blonde locks between your fingers until he exhales, "i'm so sorry," he breathes, "I...I didn't mean to snap like that..."
a tiny smile tugs at the corners of your lips, and you unravel yourself to cup his jaw into your palms once again. "I appreciate the apology, but I don't think I should be on the receiving end of it..." you hint sweetly.
nanami closes his eyes guiltily. "I'm a horrible father."
you click your tongue with disappointment, your face falling as your disapproval pinches between the space of your brows.
"you're just human," you remind him defensively, "you're a wonderful father, the best man that our daughter can look up to"
"did you see the look on her face?" he replies, his voice unnaturally small. the tender expression he gives you is filled with regret, and it's enough to make your heart ache all over again.
"kento," you contend, "don't do this to yourself. we're both going to have days where we mess up, but that doesn't mean that the problem can't be fixed."
you thread his hair between your fingers, like your brushing through rays sunlight. "she's waiting for me to read her a bedtime story," you explain, "but I'm sure she would rather be with you instead..."
"I doubt that," your husband replies as he reaches for your hand to kiss the inside of your palm.
"we will always love you, kento," you answer back, "unconditionally. on your good days and your bad ones"
he didn't even know how desperately he needed to hear that, for your certainty to remedy away all his sorrows, until they actually left your lips.
your husband's throat tightens, tears pricking his eyes once more but he hides them away when he leans in to seek out a kiss from the woman whose heart he deeply adores.
・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・
nanami leans his shoulder against the frame of his daughter's room. his heart patters lightly, making him realize that he might actually be nervous. it's strange, he thinks, that he would feel hesitant to approach his own child considering that he was her guardian but nanami had never allowed his professional life to fracture into his personal one like this before.
she's seated on the floor next to a pile of books and her stuffed rabbit secured tightly underneath her arm. there's a warmth in his chest when when he makes note of the soft toy, because he purchased that himself the day she was born and the pair have been inseparable ever since.
he clears his throat, bringing his scuffed knuckles to gently knock on the door.
"my love?" he calls out to her.
his daughter perks up, her breathing changing slightly as it rises and falls with a hint of apprehension. she glances over her shoulder to see him.
"where's mama?" she asks, her question shattering the man into a million pieces at her subtle dismissal.
"taking a shower," he answers cooly, "but I'm here to get you ready for bed..."
her lovely eyes refuse to lock into his own, and she simply tucks her lip between her bottom teeth to avoid giving nanami a reply.
she looks so much like him when he was a child. he remembered when his parents used to scold him too, and how he would also hide away in his room. the only difference is that nanami's parents were far more traditional - a time where elders were never submissive to young hearts.
"may I come in?" he requests politely, ensuring that his daughter knew she had a choice if she wanted to speak to him.
her nostrils flare slightly while she considers him, but to his relief she nods her head eagerly.
nanami steps into her room, always feeling largely out of place amongst her things. "did you find a story for bed?" he asks.
she again quietly nods her head and picks up her favorite book; a compilation of japanese folktales with beautiful illustrations. you both have been reading one for her each night ever since she got it it as a present from her grandparents.
he crouches on his knees to meet her at eye level. "you've really been enjoying this one, haven't you?" he carries on, hoping to coax more words out of her.
“yeah,” she replies in the same mousy voice of uncertainty. she shifts her attention away when she stands on her feet, clutching onto the stuffed bunny tightly while her other hand swings the book by her side.
“and what tale are we reading tonight?”
she shrugs her shoulders with indifference, a hint of pink blushing her cheek. “I dunno. I…I can just until mama is ready…”
nanami visibly slumps. her rejection an entirely new painful experience that he's never endured before. he scratches the back of his head anxiously, finding himself at a loss for words. the seconds pass, an awkward bubble surrounding both father and daughter. it’s only broken when nanami exhales a sigh, and reaches his hands towards her waist to draw her into his frame.
“darling,” he addresses tenderly, “can you look at me?”
“no, you were mean…” she blurts out, her bottom lip trembling slightly.
nanami’s heart sinks.
that’s the first time he’s ever heard those words from her lips.
“I know,” he murmurs shamefully.
her mouth forms into a tiny button of a pout but she meets his eyes for the first time as he acknowledges his behavior.
nanami arches forward to kiss her forehead, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that, sweetheart. I’m so sorry if I upset or scared you”
she fidgets with the book in her hand. “did you not want onigiri?” she asks, her innocence tugging the corners of her father’s lips into a small grin.
“it wasn’t the onigiri, my love,” he reassures, “daddy just…had a bad day at work…”
“why was it bad?”
nanami sighs once again.
she still doesn’t know that he’s a sorcerer. you’ve both reduced his position to her by simply explaining that nanami “helps and protects people".
thankfully your daughter doesn’t pry too hard to ask any further questions.
“someone I know got hurt. so, daddy was a little shaken up when he came home…”
"shaken up?"
"scared, my love"
his daughter shakes her head in disbelief, “nu-uh, you never get scared, papa” she rebuts.
nanami huffs out a laugh, flashing her a full grin now as he brings his fingers to his chin to to ponder her sweet statement. he quirks his brow and cheekily replies, "we can't all be brave like you," in an attempt to lighten the mood.
his daughter narrows her eyes towards his hand, her mind instantly distracted with other things already. "you got hurt too papa!" she gasps, dropping the bunny by her side to point at his knuckles.
nanami glances at his fingers covered in red marks.
"wait!" she exclaims as she places the book by his side. "I have something!"
she spins on her heel and rushes towards one of her drawers. meanwhile, nanami just takes her in with his love soaked eyes, watching as she rummages through her stuff with determination until she scurries back his way.
"got it!" she squeaks with a smile, and to his surprise she jumps right into his arms with such nonchalance it nearly make him crumble on the spot.
your voice echoes in the back of his mind: "we will always love you, kento. unconditionally. on your good days and your bad ones"
"mama bought it for me," she explains, regaining her father's attention once more.
nanami rests his cheek on her shoulder, and inhales her powdery scent as he keeps one arm warmly secured around her waist. he watches her peel off the plaster of the band aid, lbefore grabbing his hand and placing it unevenly over his knuckles.
"now a kiss!" she adds, as she brings his hand to her mouth and exaggerates a loud "mwah" sound for emphasis. "mama says the kiss is what makes it all better"
nanami instantly feels significantly better from this remedy of love. he extends his digits out, and looks at the hot pink "hello kitty" band aid that now rests comfortably on his knuckles.
"thank you, my darling," he coos and peppers her cheek with a few kisses before turning her to face him once again. "you made me feel a lot better"
she flashes him an equally large smile in return, showing off her missing teeth.
"I did?"
nanami chuckles as he scoops her up in his arms to give her a well deserved bear hug. she laughs as he stands on his two feet, and sheds away any lingering thoughts of apprehension that may have stuck.
"you always do," he reassures, his soul vibrating back to life when he feels her return his embrace. “you think you can forgive me for how I spoke earlier?”
“yeah,” she confirms and squeezes him just a little tighter. "I love you lots, papa"
"oh, my angel," he hums, "you have no idea just how much I love you too..."
・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・
after winding down from your evening pampering session, you decide to pass by your daughter's room to check on your little family. you peer through the cracked door to find nanami spread out on your daughter’s bed, with your daughter curled into side and her head resting on his chest.
“did I come from a peach too like momotarō?” you hear her ask, but your heart flutters at the sight of your husband’s pearly whites.
you’ll never get over how much you love seeing him smile with such genuine emotion.
“no,” you hear nanami reply calmly, his finger lightly holding the page open. “you remember your mother explaining how you used to live in her stomach first?”
“oh yeah,” your daughter replies with a hint of disappointment over the fact that she was not birthed from a piece of fruit as mentioned in one of her favorite folk tales.
“shall I carry on?”
“uh-huh,” she answers and she readjusts her position to get even more comfortable. "I think if we look hard enough we might find momotarō..."
"you think so?" your husband wonders with honest curiosity.
"I know so, papa!"
"how many peaches do you think we need to check?"
"hmmm," she mumbles, "maybe a million?"
"a million?" your husband dramatically replies, "that's a lot of peaches don't you think,"
"I mean, it's less than a billion..." she responds quite matter of factly.
you catch his gaze from between the door that’s ajar. his expression fully relaxes, and you smile knowingly in his direction at the sight of father and daughter making up.
“papa?” his daughter questions upon his sudden silence, but your husband keeps his focus on you as he hums in acknowledgement before replying, "you're not wrong, but it'll still be quite a challenge to cut through a million peaches..."
"we might need some help," your daughter adds on.
you blow him a secret kiss as to not interrupt further, and quietly close the door before heading back to your bedroom.
#[peach is away.💌]#[peach queues.🧡]#nanami x reader#nanami x you#nanami x female reader#nanami x ofc#nanami kento x you#nanami kento x reader#nanami kento angst#nanami angst#nanami hurt/comfort#jujutsu kaisen angst#nanami fluff#jujutsu kaisen fan fiction#jjk fluff
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Chosen p.t 2 || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader love island au
Summary: read part one here
Warnings: angst
Word count: 1,173
A/n: help i forgot i had this in my queue LOL mb!!!
MASTERLIST (love island au masterlist)
divider by @h-aewo
You laid in bed, staring at the ceiling, Rafe’s absence a hollow ache beside you. You’d grown used to the warmth of his arm around you, the gentle rise and fall of his chest that lulled you to sleep each night. Without him, the bed felt colder, lonelier, and you couldn’t shake the memory of Kayla’s confident words as she chose him, as if she held a secret you didn’t.
Leah rubbed your arm in comfort, her eyes softening. “Yeah, must be tough after last night. The whole situation was shit. I don’t know what Kayla was thinking.” You managed a small smile, but it didn’t reach your eyes. “Neither do I, honestly. Rafe said there was nothing to worry about, but then she just… picked him. It just doesn’t make sense.”
You caught Sofia’s gaze, and she gave you a small, reassuring nod. “Maybe it’s not as deep as it seems,” she offered. “Maybe she just picked him because he looks good on paper—he’s confident, attractive, all that. She probably just wanted attention.” You nodded, trying to take comfort in her words, but the unease still simmered.
You nodded, trying to find comfort in her words, but the uncertainty still twisted inside you. Rafe had reassured you last night, had looked you in the eyes and held your hand with that steady, familiar touch that always made you feel seen. But now, with the memory of Kayla confidently choosing him and the doubt simmering beneath, it was harder to trust that feeling.
Leah’s voice broke the silence, softer now. “Have you talked to him about it?” You sighed, closing your eyes briefly as if that might ease the knot in your chest. “He tried last night. But I… I couldn’t. I was too hurt, too angry. I didn’t even know if I could believe him.”
Sofia’s hand found yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I think he’s probably feeling the same, People make decisions that don’t always make sense because they’re worried about what everyone thinks.” You leaned your head back, closing your eyes for a moment as you tried to steady your breathing.
Maybe they were right—maybe it was all just the game getting in your head, Kayla’s pick a calculated move, an attempt to create drama or stir things up. But the memory of Rafe looking away as Sophie announced your single status felt too raw to ignore.
~
Later that morning, as you sat in the makeup room, humming softly to yourself as you applied your skincare, a knock sounded at the door. The other girls exchanged glances, then called out, “Yeah, we’re dressed!” The door creaked open, and Rafe peeked in, his gaze instantly landing on you. He lingered in the doorway, holding a tray with coffee and breakfast.
“Hey,” he said quietly, his expression somewhere between hopeful and tentative. “Brought you breakfast.“ You blinked, caught off guard by the gesture. “Thanks,” you replied softly, surprised at how sincere he looked, how he seemed to truly want to make up for the night before. He set the tray down beside you and took a step back, as if unsure whether he should stay.
“Could we… talk?” he asked, his gaze flickering to the other girls, who quickly exchanged sympathetic glances. Leah gave you a small nod, then ushered everyone else out with a quiet, “Alright, let’s go, girls.” You sent her a grateful look as they slipped out, leaving you alone with Rafe.“Can I sit?” he asked, watching you closely, his eyes searching for any sign of welcome.
You nodded, and he pulled up a chair, watching you as you took a sip of coffee. It was exactly how you liked it, and that little detail twisted something in your chest. Neither of you spoke for a moment, the silence thick with unspoken words. Finally, he sighed, running a hand through his hair as he struggled to meet your eyes.
“I need you to believe me,” he began, his voice barely above a whisper. “I swear, I didn’t think she’d actually pick me. I thought I’d made it clear I wasn’t interested.” You looked away, biting down on the emotions that threatened to spill over. “Rafe, you don’t understand. You were there, comforting me, telling me everything was fine… and then she chose you. It felt like a slap in the face.”
He nodded, his expression pained. “I know. And I’m so sorry. I tried to make it clear to her, but I should’ve done more. I shouldn’t have let her think there was even a chance. I just… I don’t want to lose you over this.” For the first time, his words began to chip away at your hurt. His eyes held that raw sincerity, the vulnerability that he rarely let anyone see.
And as much as you wanted to cling to the anger, to shield yourself from the fear of being hurt again, a part of you knew he was being honest. You bit your lip, studying his face as he spoke, trying to gauge his sincerity. He looked back at you, a hint of desperation in his gaze that you couldn’t ignore. “You have to believe me,” he continued, voice almost a whisper. “I don’t want anyone else. It’s just you.”
Your shoulders relaxed, the anger ebbing slightly, though the doubt was still there. “Okay, Rafe,” you said finally, your tone soft but uncertain. “But actions speak louder than words. If you really mean it, you’ll have to prove it.” He nodded earnestly, relief flickering in his eyes as he reached for your hand.
“I will,” he promised. “I’ll prove it every single day if I have to. Just… give me a chance.” You nodded, feeling the weight of his words settle over you. He gave your hand a gentle squeeze, then smiled—a genuine, soft smile that reminded you of all the moments that had made you fall for him in the first place. “Finish your breakfast,” he murmured, nodding toward the tray. “I’ll be right here.”
#love island!rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#outer banks#obx fanfiction#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron imagine#rafe obx#rafe cameron smut#outer banks fanfiction#rafe outer banks#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader#drew starkey#drew starkey x y/n#rafe cameron x kook!reader#drew starkey x reader#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron angst#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fluff#rafe cameron outer banks#outerbanks x reader#rafe fanfiction#rafe imagine#rafe cameron and you#rafe cameron and y/n#rafe cameron and reader
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IT'S ABOUT THE POWERLESSNESS OF A CHILD AND YET THE OVERARCHING POWER OF CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES.
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DO YOU HEAR ME THAT'S SO ORV!!!
See here. BSD is a story about how all of our characters were once children. How the scars and wounds and secrets of their past will always haunt them to the present. We see it with Chuuya, Yosano, Ranpo, even Odasaku briefly, Atsushi, Tachihara, Akutagawa, Kyouka and Kenji right now, even Kouyou just a little bit. They've all overcome it or they've allowed it to consume them. And yet that brief glimpse into a past where they were young and scarred shows us once again just how human they are...every criminal, ever person, was once a child wounded by or protected from the world and doesn't that count for something even if it doesn't excuse the atrocities they commit today?
#okay this is my last reblog addition to this but i was overwrought with thoughts#and sorry to bring it back to orv BUT IT IS!#It's about the way the child is so HELPLESS against the world and yet the way the things that happen in your childhood...#stay with you for the rest of your life??#AGHHHHHH#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bsd spoilers#orv#orv spoilers#not really but i did tag it as spoilers for bsd...#orv musings#bsd musings#character analysis#spitting nonsense#oh yeah this is also a good place to announce im likely to not be on tumblr much#unfortunately i cannot keep up with things....#i may be back but for now everything will just go into the queue including stuff for the latest eps#i say this as i look at all the drafts i didnt queue and scream.....#but yeah i need to take a step back before tumblr starts not being fun....#so if i dont reblog your stuff its because i wasnt here or because its in the queue :(#anyway watch as bsd and my actual life and orv and other medias slowly destroy my sanity#edit: also i should mention that y'all are amazing too thank you for indulging my rambles
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