#[tw: mention of dehydration]

[goldkirk]

.

[valewritessss]

Something about me is that I’m always dehydrated.

I always have been. I went to the ER in first grade because I didn’t drink water all day during summer camp.

I feel thirsty but for some reason I can just ignore it and I forget I’m thirsty.

I get constipated because I never drink water. I have so much water retention because I never drink water. My skin is suffering because I never drink water. I’m low on energy because I never drink water. My hair falls a lot because I never drink water.

Part of the reason I forget to drink it is because two years or so ago, I hated that I would get bloated after taking a sip of anything (I also hated the way I looked I thought I was fat but this was why) so I decided to just not drink water until I got home from school. I also started skipping meals which made things worse but this is about water right now. Obviously, this made the matter worse because I was already dehydrated to begin with so I started to get even more bloated, more tired, I felt like shit all the time, and my anxiety levels skyrocketed. Then I went to the doctor and told her about it in hopes that she would give me some magical solution. She just told me to drink water and I was like oh…

Long story short, drink water. I started drinking a lot more water and my skin sighed in relief, my hair is try thriving, and I get less bloated now. I overall feel more confident and energized, I would definitely recommend.

I still forget to drink water a lot since it kind of became a habit to ignore my thirst but I’m working on it and it’s helped a lot

[snowfolly]

Tonight was one of those Friday nights where I just needed some shitty beer, shitty junk food, a good candle burning and a BG3 marathon — gonna have a headache but it was worth it 10/10

(Plus getting close to Astarion’s confession to durge au Tali ahhhhHHhhh)

[mosspapi]

I truly do not understand how my parents expect me to just. Be totally chill and normal and have no rules or issues with food completely out of the blue, as if they didn't spend literally my entire childhood from ages 0 to 19 like. Fully banning 90% of "junk" food, not allowing anything other than water or juice more than once a month on special occasions, only letting us have fast food more than once a year (if we were lucky) when it was literally medically prescribed to me bcuz I was so underweight and deficient in shit I needed a neurologist to tell me if I didn't eat Pringles every day I would probably die, literally saying to my face that the blood sugar gummies I ate bcuz I was too sick to keep anything else down were "too high calorie", saying that even iceberg lettuce is unhealthy, and so much more. Like. You guys. Why are surprised that I'm not comfortable having two cups of iced tea in a single day. I unironically feel like I should be taken out back and shot for doing this. And that IS your fault. You cannot act surprised that I'm like this when you are the ones who raised me to be this way.

[incorrectquotesideas-deactivated]

Person A, reading the pre-written eulogy Person B wrote to them: “Hi, I’m Person A. Gee, I hope I don’t roll this eulogy up and smoke it.” Is that what you really think of me? I’m not just a drug guy, you know? I speak latin!

Person C: Yeah, sure.

Person D: Yeah, dude, you love weed, we get it.

[caterpillarinacave]

You know that feeling when your so anxious it makes you sick, but the idea of being sick makes you more anxious, so now you aren’t sure whether your sick, anxious or just going to vomit

[robertsbarbie]

i was supposed to prettify my etsy today but i fell asleep and now i have a migraine so that’ll be tomorrow’s problem

[watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees]

Thank you

masterlist

tw: self harm, forced self harm, depression, captivity, triggering someone on purpose, knives, blood, non-con touch (non sexual), threats, blood loss, breaking someone’s psyche beyond repair basically, kidnapping mention, weightloss and malnutrition mention, dehydration, healed scars, multiple whumpers mentioned, flashback

I wrote this on my way home from university for the weekend (which is like a 4 hour train ride) and I made myself cry with it, and I haven't been able to proofread it or anything so,,, here it goes i guess

Tw again: This is a very fucking heavy piece, i cried through writing it im not even joking biggest dead dove do not eat

To be fair, she was totally unphased by the sight of the knife in Cole’s hand. She welcomed the pain that was to come as an old friend, crying or begging never helped, there was no relief when she was angry at the world, angry at the people keeping her captive, so she just accepted it. It was quiet and calm, maybe not the best decision, but the circumstances left her no choice.

He walked back to her from the table where he kept the array of knives and other fun devices to torture the girl.

“Stand up, please” he reached under her chin, lightly touching the skin. As she was standing up it looked like he was lifting her by the chin just with one finger, and though physically it didn’t work like that, the sheer threat behind the touch basically lifted her. She was a feather and he was the wind making her float.

She was noticably smaller than the man, even though they were almost the same height. Her figure was frail and weak. The long sleeved t-shirt she was wearing covered both her arms, whose muscles used to show through them, not in a bulky way but in one that earned some respect at the gym and she walked around freely, without worrying about being overpowered by someone; it took years of martial arts classes and trainings. It was all gone by now. She didn’t remember how or when it happened but she stopped caring. They didn’t allow her to work out even though she was promised to be let “doing her thing when she wasn’t needed” at first it was the restraints, then the comments turned into threats and punishments that slowly made her stop. It has been too long.

Now she was standing in front of the man, not being able to even breathe without his permission. Cole was always stronger and now he seemed superhuman compared to her.

He looked her up-and-down, twirling the knife in his hand. He seemed to have decided when he looked back to her face, patiently waiting for her to make eye contact.

“Roll your sleeves up” he gestured towards her lower arm with the knife. He grabbed her hand when she did so, and glided the knife playfully over her arm.

He must’ve felt the unevenness of her skin because he held the blade away from her and started carressing the barely visible scars.

She shivered from the touch, it wasn’t necessarily cruel or mocking like it usually is when he touches her, but these scars were different and he seemed to treat them differently and somehow that was so much worse. It was unpredictable.

“Was it… was it Luke?” he asked already knowing the answer was no. She looked away to the floor, felt her cheeks blush with a feeling similar to guilt but she couldn’t quite put a finger on what it actually was.

“No” she whispered. His hand stilled for a moment before carrying on with carressing her skin and turning the knife back towards her.

“Then you’ll be comfortably familiar with this feeling” he smiled and without a second of hesitation drove the knife into her skin. The blade didn’t go too deep, just enough to draw blood.

She stared at the fresh cut and suddenly she was back in her room. Some tiny red drops got onto the carpet and she was thinking about how she’ll have to scrub it out. There wasn’t anyone holding her hand, she was resting it on her lap for a moment. She promised it to herself so many times not to do it again, but she felt like she couldn’t help it when she found the tiny blade in the drawer on her desk. She held it up to the light and read the brand name again, feeling a bit sorry for the small piece of metal, it wasn’t designed for this purpose.

She drew another line on her skin, reveling in the radiating pain that shot up her arm again. It hurt so bad and still not as much as whatever she was dealing with at the time. She felt in control. And she did it again.

She caught herself falling against his chest, grabbing onto her bleeding arm. Not remembereing how she started crying.

“It’s okay” he held her by the elbow. He turned her around hugging her from the back. WIth his left still holding her wrist. The right accidentally dripping blood on her shirt and pants searched for her right hand. She desperately held onto him. As if holding his hand would bring any reconciliation. Suddenly the knife was in her palm and his hand over hers, making her hold it up. It looked so much bigger in her hand. The clean part of the blade glinted dangerously as the grey light from the window hit it. It was already dusking.

‘Your turn” he whispered into her ear, not even waiting for a response just pushing her hand back down, pressing the blade down for the fourth time.

His warmth disappeared from behind her. She was sitting at her desk again. Drawing her own blood over and over again. There was no purpose to it anymore. The pain from the wounds all mixed together it didn’t make a difference.

Why did she even do it? Everything was alright for a while, and all of a sudden it weighed her down. Did she really want something good turn for worse again? Was having it good a bad thing? She didn’t think she deserved it after all. That must’ve been behind the thoughtless movements. Breaking the skin over and over again. Opening old wounds. Creating new ones. Covering it all. That was the rhythm for weeks.

It all stopped when that particular someone held her hand for the first time and helped her up from where she was sitting in her room.

Now the feeling of the hand over hers was much colder. It didn’t radiate warmth and safety through her veins, making her feel at piece with whatever came along the way; it was empty as if Cole’s touch made it all evaporate into nothing cutting through space and time.

He rested his chin on her shoulder inhaling deeply, enjoying the shivers each breath sent down her spine. He felt the warmth of the tears that ran down her face staining his cheek as well.

“Now, thank me” he whispered, slolwy lifting her hand with the knife up. It took her a few seconds to understand the words though she still wasn’t in the place to comprehend them. “Did you hear me?” he asked gently, still threateningly. She moved her head in a way that could’ve been mistaken as a nod and that was enough on his part. He knew she wasn’t grabbing onto the knife so he let go, letting her hand fall limply down to her thigh and the knife to hit the cement ground with loud metallic clatter. She flinched back into his chest with a bit of delayed reaction time. He repeated the order, slowly and quietly.

“Tha- th- thank y-y-you” she stuttered.

“For what?” He let go of her cut up hand to reach across her torso and pull her into a snakelike hug from behind. He pushed a kiss into the crook of her neck smiling, when she didn’t know how to answer. She breathed in, but the air got stuck in her throat and no words came out.

“What are you thanking me for?” his smile grew even wider.

“F- f- for hurting me” her tone suggested she wasn’t sure of the answer being right.

“No” he answered sweetly “You hurt yourself, remember? You held the knife” he tightened the embrace making breathing even more difficult for her. She was panicking, he felt her pulse through her neck quicken.

“for holding m- … -lf” The correct answer struck her like lightning, she couldn’t get it to be audible the first time. Of course it was the one that hurt the most. She took a deep breath, and the words fell from her lips whether she wanted them to or not.

“Thank you for holding my hand while I hurt myself”

[sleepys-sunny-garden]

hi friends i am definitely mentally stable 👍 (< lying)

[yaboy-miz]

Also off topic but did you know that both Prozac and Adderall can make you pee more which can contribute to dehydration? If you take one or especially both, please for the love of god drink water. Also, if you vomit from dehydration, you should go to the doctor.

[warsinmyhead]

When the Quartermaster’s Away, the Agents Make it a Competition

@sovrumana

[galaxialauthority]

Headache from insomnia? Headache from split? Headache from not eating? Headache from stress? Headache from dehydration? Headache from dissociation? Headache from switch? Headache from-

[mosspapi]

Bruh I had bloodwork done this morning and they ended up trying both my arms (which unfortunately they seem to have to do very frequently which. Whatever ig I just have finicky veins lmao) but now they're both super fucking bruised and sore and I'm just. Owie :(

[bboisawesome]

Considering I have collapsed and puked from not drinking enough water, about 3 times now. I can guarantee that I am not in the percentage that drinks this much water.

Please don’t be like me. Being dehydrated is not fun. :D

u know those water cooler jugs?

fun fact your body consumes about one of these per week. those are 20 liter/5 gallon jugs; it varies by individual but for most people that is roughly how much water you drink in a week, give or take. one week. that is insane. that is so much water. why do humans need this much water. naughty little thirst slut. i hope u wither

[whostolemygoldfish]

I am feeling awful, I'm feeling sick and tired and stressed as hell from classes starting up again, my disability is only getting worse, everything hurts, my stomach and throat hurts because I made the mistake of trying a banana again (I'm allergic, I get anaphylaxis) because my dumbass wanted to know if they were still poisonous to me (they are), I'm so tired but I can't sleep, I've had a pounding headache since 11 this morning, I've realized that I only drank like a can of sparkling water every day for like the last week so I forced myself to drink four cups, the first two I gulped down, the last two I struggled to keep down because I've also not been eating right and my stomach was empty, I think my ED is coming back, I've been going to bed at two and waking up at six for the past week and a half, I should probably go back to a therapist again but it's expensive as fuck, my organs are screaming at me, my dysphoria about my chest has been making me feel like shit recently, I put on a binder and I still have very visible boobs, I can't bring myself to make anything but the most vent art ish art, whether it's my writing or my drawings or my songs, everything hurts everywhere.

All of my awful memories are creeping in again and I'm forgetting things more often, I'm not going to self harm again because I'm better than that and I'm a year and a half clean but I can still see all of my scars and that's upsetting to me because people bring them up and then I either have to tell them that I was abused as a child or that it was self inflicted because both are still visible, my bad grandparents who abused me could show up anytime and I would never know beforehand.

I really just want to feel better in the morning

I'm going to go to sleep and hope that I don't throw up and choke on it in my sleep.

[poughkeepsies]

My calorie intake is way too low I need to get on that