#[ I TOOK 200 YEARS WITH THIS BUT OH WELL 8)))) ]

[despairforme]

The box is innocuous. Brown Kraft cardboard. FedEx branded and messily taped shut with poorly cut cellophane packing tape. Addressed to on Nnoitra Gilga. His address printed on the post-office produce mailing order. No return to sender details.

If Nnoitra were to shake the little box, the sound of crinkling plastic and the shuffle of items inside would be detected.

Inside: a plastic ziplock bag filled with eyeballs in a soup of vitreous humor. Optic nerves still attached. All of them dark browns and blacks.

The sticky note attached reads: Hey bugaboo! try these on for size. -P xx 🔪

[assassins au - a little gift for Nnoi]

A box addressed to him was immediately suspicious as fuck. Especially when the sender's name wasn't anywhere to be seen. It looked like it was trying to be too anonymous. Cheaply anonymous. Nnoitra's very first thought was: It's a fuckin' bomb. As if it would actually have a ticking timer, like in movies, he placed his ear against the top of the box, and listened. Not a sound. So, it was high-tech then.

Of course he was going to open it, even though it might explode in his face. It wasn't the worst way to go.

When he opened it, he wasn't careful about it. If it was going to explode it better just fucking get on with it.

Nothing happened. No explosion. No smoke. Nothing. It was almost underwhelming. Nnoitra tipped his head to the side as he looked at the content.

It was a ziplock bag filled with what looked like guts. Blood, at least. Nnoitra took a closer look and realized it was a bag of eyeballs. It made him breathe out a short laugh. Someone was poking fun at him for only having one eye, huh? There was a sticky-note attached, and that kinda gave away who it was from. Nnoitra had only heard one person ever call him "bugaboo". It was that weirdo with the blue hair ( Nnoitra had forgotten his name ). He held the bag up and slushed the inside from side to side like it was a stim-toy.

❝ Yanno, my eye 's grey, yeah? ❞ None of these were the right colour to match the stormy colour of his single remaining eye. At least he could be pretty sure this wasn't some sort of threat. It was just supposed to be funny. Which it kinda was. Too bad he didn't know the guy's address, or he would've sent him something in return. What would he have sent? Hm. Who knows.

[sweetlady555]

My Personal Solar Return Observations Pt III

reminder to check your degrees in your sr chart as they play a big factor in how certain sr placements would play out!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Venus 5H 17° SR - when i had this in my sr chart for 2023-2024 i saw myself experimenting more with different creative styles/looks. i would try to find inspiration from different creatives on instagram. while i was doing this, i started talking to a well known designer in that creative scene who had messaged me because he liked my style. it was a secret relationship because he cheated on someone to be with me which i thought they were completely done but he kept going back to her then back to me. he was obsessed with me and it was a really weird relationship, he would only come to me when his lustful desires were acting up and then would go when he was satisfied 💀. i was tired of this so i started talking to someone else and he found and his little ego got so hurt and he blocked me thank fucking god 😭😭!! I was also approached by another creative because he wanted to use my face as inspiration for his clothing brand hehe ( the 17° rules leo & fame )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Aries Rising 2° SR - when i had this i felt like i was really impulsive i did lots of things without thinking twice. i had my chart ruler in the 5h that year so it might be different if you end up having your asc ruler somewhere else in your sr chart, but for me i was impulsive when it came to switching different styles. i also started drinking and partying for the first time when i had a aries rising in my sr when it was placed in my 5h. aside from this, i was very determined on finishing goals i set my mind to and i was very consistent in trying to build a good foundation for myself. ( the 2° rules taurus & early stages )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Moon 7H 4° SR - most of my relationships that i had that year were lowkey codependent, the guys i talked to that year were very emotionally dependent and attached to me. they would usually call or message me out of nowhere to vent or open up to me which would be random asf lmaoo ( the 4° rules cancer & security/protection )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Mercury 3H 28° SR - I started talking to my siblings more and my relationship grew closer with them. I also started becoming more vunerable with my siblings. My relationship with my siblings were more nurturing compared to the past. ( the 28° rules cancer & heightened sensitivity/vulnerability )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Mars 5H 21° SR - I went out a lot more when i had this in my sr chart with my sisters friends who would randomly go out just for the fun of it 😭, like it was last minute most of the times but it was so fun tho! i got to do lots of things on the trips we went to! I was also more open to expressing my creativity like making clothes and putting it out there and such. ( the 21° rules saggitarius & travel/freedom )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Jupiter 1H 8° SR - I was more optimistic about life when I had this placement in my sr chart. I also felt like I was really lucky when it came to travelling more. places ive wanted to go to forever i ended up going to! things i wanted to experience i experienced! it was a good year for experiencing new things. ( the 8° rules scorpio & transformations )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Uranus 2H 21° SR - yeah i dont know where my money went that year 💀 money would come fast and then it would go even faster 😭 i saw my money as a source of freedom and thought of money so recklessly like, “oh these shoes are $300 but i just got fired? dont worry the money will come back *BOUGHT🧾*” so i didnt care much about saving or anything 😭 it came back though!! but then it went bye bye the next day😍 also for some weird reason whenever i took money out from daily pay which is a app where you can take money out early from your check when you work, whenever i took it out it ended up saying i had to pay back the amount i took out? like uhhh im pretty sure this was my money i took out 😂🤔… so now im -$200 but they gotta catch me in person cuz im not paying that 😹 ( the 21° degree rules saggitarius and freedom )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Pluto 11H 29° SR - i ended two 5+ year friendship that year, it was hard but it was a trio and i found out that the both of them would ditch me to go hangout and do substances and i feel like that didnt align with my path because you are who you hangout with!! i also saw my goals/path changing that year, I completely re-evaluated what i wanted to do 🙏. ( the 29° is a anaretic degree that rules major transformations/completion/endings )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ Chiron 1H 19° SR - I was VERY critical on how others percieved me and my self image, i had multiple identity crises. I was super insecure the year I had this in my sr chart i cant even lie, despite so many people telling me how beautiful I was I just couldnt see it. 2 months before my birthday in 2024 i ended up understanding who i was and finding out what I LIKE and not what other people expected of me. im not facing multiple identity crises anymore which i thank my nn in my 1h from that year 🙏. ( 19° rules libra & can make a person more erratic and critical )

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 1H SR in 5H SR - I was more open to showcasing my creative talents, designing clothes, starting lots of creative projects. I was also having sooo much fun that year i miss it so much but lemme stop reminiscing 💔 I was also more flirty and playful that year leading me to have a few romantic encounters this year. Lots of creativity, fun, and sexual encounters happened that year.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 2H SR in 5H SR - I spent most of my money on clothes and on creative projects just things that made me happy!!!! I was also recieving money from a lot of guys who wanted sexual things from me but they got #finessed and i didnt care because who do you think i am???????

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 3H SR in 3H SR - when i had this i started getting into astrology more, i was also reading a lot more aswell. I was really curious and i needed lots of mental stimulation from something that was neverending and astrology just so happened to be it 😹. I was also making tons of short trips that year.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 4H SR in 7H SR - my family life was lowkey stopping me from getting into any relationships, i came to the realization i wouldnt be able to get into any relationships while living with my parents because of how controlling they can be. Also my sister got into a new relationship that sr year.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 5H SR in 7H SR - I started talking to a creative designer the year I had my 5h in my 7h. I was also getting involved with creative partnerships aswell, promoting eye contacts/lashes/having my face used for someones brand. I also attended more parties and was going out more so i found most of my relationship encounters were through that.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 6H SR in 4H SR - i changed my diet when i had this in my sr. I also didnt know how to balance my work life and home life so it clashed terribly and i got fired😭. I was also going out more with my sister so my routines have changed from never going out at all to going out every week.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 7H SR in 5H SR - I met lots of new friends and different social circles through fun plans like partying, girls trips etc.. I also had lots of fun romantic encounters when i had this in my sr whether i met them when i was drunk or at parties it was lots of fun lol. There was so much childlike joy when it came to my relationships that sr year.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 8H SR in 5H SR - i lost my virginity the year i had this in my sr😶 but besides that my relationships in that sr year really shaped my understanding of love and myself. i was also recieving money from relationships i felt like a sugar baby🙈

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 9H SR in 1H SR - BABY I WAS OUTSIDEEE😭😩 okay besides that, that sr year when i had this i experienced a lot of new things that helped me discover who i was on the inside 😊. I was focused on self growth especially that year!

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 10H SR in 12H SR - I thought a lot about what I wanted to do career wise and how it would align with my goals and my purpose . I had this in my sr when I got fired 😭 and i realized I would prefer being my own boss when it came to my work life

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 11H SR in 12H SR - I unfriended my closest friends after re-evaluating our friendships that year. I also found out shady shit about them and I didn’t like that which led me to unfriending them

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 12H SR in 2H SR - i was manifesting money a lot the year i had this and im not even gonna lie it was coming!! so if you have this in your sr this year, manifest that moola$$$!!!!! i was also receiving money behind the scenes from other people the year i had this in my sr chart .

if my sr chart for that solar return year was a song it would be definitely be this song 🥲 #willforevercherishthatyear

dont forget to check out my other personal sr observations if you enjoyed this one :) !

[phantomrose96]

OH FUCK I KNOW WHATS DRIVING ME TO DRINK ABT 938SPS

it's that Mendoza DOES put up with it! It's that everyone's put up with Carson until that single moment! It's that Mendoza nearly went with it! It's that everyone that's ever paired with Carson has been like, wow he's odious. He's the worst. But either not a single thing can be done about it or it never occurs to anyone to do anything about it, especially in conjunction with "well 8 days our time is 41 years, so what is there really to be done?"

It feels like this job would self-select for assholes & people who don't want to deal with problems - it's not like anyone will remember you by the time you get fed up and leave, after all. And where would you go, if you had a problem with a crew member? You're stuck there until you're fed up, and then where do you go from there? It's like the universe's worst cult or something. Everyone that could have talked you out of this is dead in like. 2 weeks time by your reckoning. A month out? Fucking forget it. You're stuck here before it might even hit you that you're stuck, and now the only people alive that could possibly understand you are the other schmucks that signed up for this. Honestly im unwell over this world you very casually built. Barkeep I'd like your finest chocolate milk pronto

(938 Seconds Per Second)

YOU GET IT YOU GET IT YOU GET IT YOU GET IT YOU GET IT.

That tongue-in-cheek thing Mendoza says right at the beginning about "They'll trash your application if you have anyone who could even be mistaken for a loved one" is literally because everyone you've ever known in your entire life will be dead by Week Fucking Two of your first mission.

This job cannot have--as in they WILL NOT TAKE--the kind of person who might get homesick, might miss friends and family they knew, might regret it 2+ weeks into the job at the realization that everything they ever knew is dead and gone and launch into a complete mental breakdown in deep hyperspace traveling 0.99998c where the first pit stop they could even boot your sorry ass at is 200 years ahead of and 200 lightyears away from anything you ever knew.

And you know what? This doesn't just rule out weak-willed or weak-constituted people. This rules out anyone with any human connection. This rules out nearly everyone.

And the only pool of applicants this leaves you with is dangerous. So the best you can do. The best you can select for. Are the subset of applicants who will Put Up With It. And there's no saying what "it" is. You can't expect comradery, or friendliness, or amicability, or respect. Not from a pool of workers defined by their lack of social connection. Not from people willing to take a job which kills everyone they've ever known in 14 days. The best you can select for is people who will just put up with each other. Who will endure.

Dorian is drunk out of his mind 24/7 and stubborn and stupid, but he does his job, and he causes no real trouble, and he endures. Carson fucking sucks but he does his job. Mendoza is probably the star employee of the fleet as a grounded and reasonable man who's simply prickly and anti-social. Sampson is the closest to normal and he's coming apart at the seams, because he's NOT a true shipmate, he's a scholar sent from his dying culture. Everyone he knows is dead and he's so very fucked up about it.

But there's nothing to be done. There's only enduring. Because there is no recourse that can be sought from outside the ship. What greater body is there? Anyone who might hold that power to mediate conflict or dole out justice was born and died in the 2 weeks it took for attempts at self-mediation to fail.

Someone could take a stand against Carson. Someone could get morally fed up with him, and quit in a fit of indignant rage. Give in their notice and walk off the ship whenever the next mission ends. Walk off onto some planet with no one and nothing they've ever known on it and try to start over from nothing.

And the ship would take off. And that person would be dead in 2 weeks' time. Bones on some speck of a planet. Gone. No one on the ship would have any reason to think about them ever again. That could be you, too, if you ever got properly tired of Garret Carson.

There are certain lines that can't be crossed. Killing a shipmate would get you fired. Would get you kicked off, penniless, at the next rest stop planet with whatever local officials exist being informed of your infraction. Once you're OFF ship, then laws, and governments, can apply to you.

But not on ship... Not on ship... and if you're smart--in the unfortunate way that Carson is smart--you can push your luck, right up against that line where no consequences will ever find you. Carson has done nothing fireable. Carson would have continued his days on that ship never doing anything that actually counts as fireable.

It's like the universe's worst cult or something. ...and now the only people alive that could possibly understand you are the other schmucks that signed up for this.

These people have no one going in. They have no one going out. The only human beings even still alive with them are the insufferable assholes stuck with them on the ship. There is no recourse. There is no safety net. There is no justice and no plan except to endure, because the pay is good, because you're being paid for thousands of years of work, and one day you can retire somewhere you've never been with enough money to not have to care that you know nothing and no one.

And until that day, you endure.

[ywpd-translations]

Ride 761: Reserve

Pag 1

1: Please get ready the allen key, the allen key

Time is going by

Yessir!!

6mm

Yessir

4: You gotta calm down

Ye.... yessir, teh!!

You're frozen stiff

Pag 2

1: Sugimoto-san, where do I put this

The supplies box is under the foil bag over there, so put it in there

2: Ah, here?

Wait

3: Whose shoulder bag is that?

Kaburagi-san's....

4: (NdT.: the writing says “Kaburagi”)

7: This way, you won't have to look for it when you'll have to take it out

Oh... thank you so much!

Time is short when you have to hand it over, so you need to take your time with preparation beforehand

8: 40 minutes before the start!!

Pag 3

1: Alright, let's get your heartbeat up one more time

Yessir, teh

Is he alright?

Soon my role as a reserve will be over

Pag 4

1: Pfuui, it's hot

Together with the signal gun at the start....

3: No....

4: I guess it's already over?

6: These six people are already rock solid

Pag 5

1: I'm sure they'll run a good race

2: How about you sit down? Sugimoto-kun

The preparations are almost done

3: And you've been standing on your feet working since this morning

Pag 6

6: I feel.... disappointed

7: Even though I lost during training camp, I was still told I'd be the reserve

I guess I still “felt like I had a chance”

Pag 7

1: Say, Sugimoto-kun

Huh

Ah, yes!?

2: Why did you start riding bikes?

4: Ah, yeah, I've never told you?

5: Yeah

Well.... it's a silly story

It's just an ordinary story that's not worth listening to- you still want to hear it?

Yeah

7: My father used to ride a road bike

He suggested it to me but I was scared so I didn't

Pag 8

1: But, one day.... ah... well, my father's family home is in Okayama

In the north of Okayama at the border with Shimane, there's a huge mountain called “Mt. Daisen”

2: One time, when he made me get on a rental bike and run, he said “let's go there”, and took me there even though I didn't want to

3: For some reason, I was deeply moved

That majestic mountain's scenery kept changing as I advanced

4: I thought it was really interesting

5: Even though I said I was scared of falling, I soon got absorbed in riding

Pag 9

1: And I thought it was fun

2: I could ride this forever...

3: that's what I thought

4: After that I asked my father to take me to, like, Lake Kawaguch or Hakone on the weekends. We went to Hakone three times, three times (haha)

5: But still, the first time you see the scenery from a mountain is the best

Pag 10

1: Maybe I wanted to see the scenery for the first time

3: When I became an high-school student, I met Naruko, Onoda, and Imaizumi

Well, I had already heard about Imaizumi in middle school races

Those three....

4: I saw them running in the Inter High giving their whole body and soul

Midosuji!!

5: I saw them from up close

Onodaaa

Onoda-kun!!

Onodaaa

Pag 11

1: In my third year, I thought I wanted to see this Inter High's scenery

3: from inside the course

6: For sure

Pag 12

1: It didn't come true though

3: No no

4: Hahaha!! Why am I talking about such gloomy things before the start!!

Sorry, sorry, forget what I said just now, forget it!! Let's be bright!!

5: I'm their support, after all

My role is to be their backup!! Yes!!

Pag 13

2: The participants will be at the starting line soon

3: I give up....

4: Ah, ah

What's wrong?

5: Ah, every year we gather cyclists from each school who failed to enter the race in the “selected team”, right?

6: Yeah, the team with white jerseys and number bibs in the 200s!!

There's a vacancy there

Pag 14

2: Give it your all!

Yes, senpai!!

3: Thirty minutes until the start!!

4: We were informed just now

Are you looking for someone to fill in?

Well... there are conditions... and there's probably no one....

5: who can be ready within fifteen minutes from now

Pag 15

2: Oooii

3: Oh... it's Touji-san

He's in a hurry

Are there troubles? It's the first time I see Touji-san running

4: Sugimoto!!

5: Huh!?

Onii-chan?

6: Why are you in such a hurry.... everyone has finished getting ready, we're going soon

Sugimoto-san?

Huh? Me?

Pag 16

1: Do you want to ride in the Inter High!?

2: Huh!?

3: Run!? In the Inter High!? Eh!?

You're saying this to me!?

I just got a call from the director

4: He's speaking with the main office right now

Pag 17

1: But the the team's six people are rock solid...

2: It's not Sohoku!!

It's the team with white jerseys and number bibs in the 200s!! There's a vacancy there

3: They asked us to lend them a reserve!!

4: You only have fifteen minutes to get ready

Moreover, it comes with strict conditions!!

6: Still, will you run!?

Pag 18

1: Sugimoto....!!

2: Sugimoto...!!

3: Sugimoto-kun!?

5: Sugimoto-san!!

6: Ehy ehy

No, no!!

7: Sadatoki, set the wheels on Sugimoto's frame!!

On!!

Pag 19

2: Wa- wait please. This is the third Inter High and I've always been working for this team behind the scenes

And, I mean, supporting is also an important.... role

Ye-yes, that's it

3: The Inter…..

4: High!?

Me!?

5: This is the important last Inter High, so I'll reliably support Imaizumi, Naruko and Onod-

Pag 20

1: Is there anyone who would throw away their dreams for someone else?

2: My Colnago

Pag 21

1: It's a great opportunity

Run!! Take....

2: This chance!!

Imaizumi....!!

4: That day was hectic for me

Until up twenty minutes before the starts I was frantically doing preparation for the race for everyone

Pag 22

1: And after that, somehow, I wore a jersey I had never seen before

2: And, shaking, I was standing at the starting line of the Inter High

[woahg-i-am-thoroughly-confused]

Hiiiiiiii

I saw your oc and its really cool so drop some lore on meeee

(if you don't mind)

OMG ING IMG IMG OMG AAHHHH SOMEONE ASKED SOEMONE FINALLY ASKED AHHHH YAYAYAYAYAYAY OH MY GOD OH MY GOD ITS HAPPENING IT’S REALLY ACTUALLY AHPPEMED AIIANHHHHHHH AYYAYAYYAAAYYAYAYYAYAYYAYAYA AHAHHHHH I’m normal I swear.

okay so my OC is Amber! They are gender-fluid, (he/she/they and I will use them interchangeably) and they are 17 (I think I actually haven’t written this all down yet but I have thought about a lot.)

UHH HEAVY TOPICS BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY I HAVE TO TRAUMATIZE THEM BEYOND GOD. (Tw, suicide, alcoholism, child abuse, that kinda stuff)

when Amber was born their dad was an alcoholic, and was gone before Amber was 3, so then it was just her and his mom. Their mom was extremely mentally ill due to the abuse she took from her ex husband(ambers biodad), so she began to neglect her child(Amber),

when Amber was seven her mom lost her job due to her illness’s, and they quickly became homeless, within a year, her mother had sold Amber to a sketchy guy in return for a large sum of money, Amber was then ripped from her mother, and put in an “orphanage” of sorts.

The world was slowly falling apart and due to on going wars between countries, the country Amber lived in started about 200 programs of soldier, assassin, and defense training camps. Amber was put into an assassin training camp.

Ambers training began once he was 8, and it started with tortuous training regimens. She would wake up at 6am and train until 9am. then if they did good, he would get breakfast. From 9:30-10:30 was lunch, there was educational training from 11-4, and then more physical training from 4:30-9:30pm, and then they would be given dinner(if they earned it) at 10pm. by the time Amber was 10, they began “mini missions” and were expected to hunt. Amber was always good at it. They always beat everyone near them. But a part them wished it wasn’t like this. She did get to meet some people though. And it wasn’t all bad. Except at exam days.

exam days, the children would be taken 2 at a time to fight. The winner, would get the other child’s food rations, stuff, and blankets, while the loser child would just- disappear. No child knew what happened to the loser. But they knew it would be nothing good. Amber always won. But, by winning, she often ruined friendships. By getting rid of peoples friends, siblings, and sometimes even partners.

by the time she was 12, she had either gotten rid of, or pushed away everyone. He was alone. Ambers brain began to change after that. They stopped trying to make friends. Or anything. They had never been interested in romance to begin with,(aro/ace icon here) but he gave up on friends.

the programs staff were well aquinted with Amber. As Amber often times got into fights, or pushed themselves far too much, or hurt themselves, to try to cope with the anger and pain.

when Amber was 15, they “graduated” from the program, leaving blood and people behind. She began talking on missions then. And he found that they LOVED, killing the bad people. It was conditioned that anyone they were assigned to kill, was born to die.

they lost their mind a little, everytime they ended a life. He enjoyed it more. Knowing she was getting rid of filth. But, there was a part of him that wanted a human connection, so when they were 16, she decided to take a month off, to try and make some friends in his field.

they met Rey(design in process) and he was so- just impressed? They began taking on partner missions together and even though their job abused them to hell and back, constantly over working them and threatening them with their lives, he knew as long as he had Rey, it would be okay. (QPR THEY HAD A QPR AND I LOVE THEM) Rey and Amember lived together after a while, and had been for almost a year and a half, they’re were both 17 when

When well, Rey wasn’t there. Rey went on a 4 day mission, and didn’t come back. Amber vowed to never come close to anyone ever again. Amber then honed in on her work, climbing the ranks and becoming pretty well known.

she couldn’t feel. Not for a second, it was kill, kill, kill, and that’s where they are now.

OKAY THATS IT, THATS ALL I HAVE RIGHT NOW I KNOW THERE ARE SOME PLOTHOLES BUT IDC RIGHT NOW!! THANK THANK THANK YOU. FOR ASKING THIS I AM SO HONORED LIKE AHHHHHHHH

[astarionslittlejuicebox]

The Promise of Eternity (Part 8)

Author: @astarionslittlejuicebox

Imagine: The reader helped Astarion ascend and became his spawn. After saving the world from the Elder brain and it’s destruction, the reader and Astarion set out to take on the world together. While he promised to never forget the gifts the reader has given him, Astarion has seemed to have changed his attitude towards the reader in the last century…. After someone breaks one of  Astarion’s rules, how will this affect the reader’s fate?

Pairing: Astarion x F!Reader

Trigger warnings: potential for minor spoilers, suggestive themes, language, mentions of death, mentions of blood, abusive relationship, mention of slavery

Word Count: 702

Imagine Series

Side Notes: 

This imagine series takes place 200 years after the events of Baldur’s Gate 3.  Everything you read in here is a story from my mind outside of the original BG3 character Astarion.

In this imagine series, Astarion is a bit more unemotionally unavailable, and this series will follow the decisions and consequences of that change. This is not canonically accepted and it is just an idea I’ve had in my head! (I do believe Astarion might truly care for the reader after Ascension, but that is open to individual interpretation.)

In this series, TAV is mildly based on my first character I played in BG3; she is a drow and I will make references to her in her background and knowledge as well. I do apologize that it is not 100% your own imagine, but the name for TAV is up to you as well as anything else that I can think of leaving to you, the reader, to decide.

I appreciate everyone who reads the imagines and this series, and I hope you enjoy the story!

TAV POV

I hovered around the yard as I looked for any sign of the tiefling arriving at our doorstep, and I noticed a couple of figures standing at the edge of the pathway. Taking cover in the nearby shrubbery, I focused on the two figures: one figure was a beautiful looking woman with blonde hair and striking golden eyes with pointy ears, and the second figure was an older elven male with golden brown hair and piercing green eyes. My eyes narrowed on their own accord as I recognized the elf as the chef we had just recently hired before the tiefling’s arrival, Ahriman . The other figure bore a striking resemblance to the tiefling that disrupted our lives.

“Are you sure that the plan will work?” Ahriman asked the beautiful looking woman, who smiled sinisterly in response.

“My darling pet, you have planted the seeds to enable my entrance into the mansion. Did you give him the potion as I instructed?” The chef nodded eagerly in response. 

“Of course, Hiedra. He drank it with his evening cup of wine, and he was none the wiser.” I felt the blood in my dead veins boil at the interaction as the woman transformed in a flash of blue light to the familiar tiefling that ruined my life.

Hiedra? That name sounds familiar. I thought to myself as I watched the interaction. Where have I heard that name before?

“Excellent. Then everything shall work, and in a few years time, his guard will be let down enough for me to get exactly what we need from him. Once we have that, we can figure out how to utilize him to take over the world as our servant.” Ahriman laughed as the woman finished her sentence.

“Good. Then the fucking bastard won’t be able to terrorize anyone any longer. What will you do for his consort?” The tiefling laughed.

“Oh, she will leave of her own accord once she realizes that he won’t have any time for her after my arrival.” He gave a nod to her before they went their separate ways; she went to the door and the chef returned the way towards the servants’ quarters. Once they disappeared from sight, I found myself back in the rock cave—seated on the floor in the middle of the circle. I took a moment to reflect on the events I had just witnessed, and I could feel myself getting pissed at what transpired the night that tiefling showed up, but I knew I couldn’t do anything without any proof. 

Now to figure out where I know the name Hiedra from, what the liquid is they’re giving Astarion, and what the hell she’s doing with his blood. Gathering my stuff, I hurried to get back to the castle.

Before I entered the castle, I recast the invisibility spell on myself and snuck into the castle. No one noticed me as I stealthily walked through the hallways. I stopped by my bedchambers to grab two flasks and a small vial before I made my way to Astarion’s bedchambers. I paused outside the double doors and pressed my ear against the solid wood. Closing my eyes, I focused my highly sensitive drow ears on any noise coming from behind the door and quickly moved to step away from the door before the doors flung open. The tiefling herself strolled out from the room.

“I’ll see you later.” She nasally spoke to someone in the room before she started walking down the hall. I stepped out from behind the door as Astarion exited the room and shut the door behind him. My heart told me to reveal myself and tell him of what I saw, but my head knew that I needed to figure out all the shit with the tiefling first. You never go into war based on a measly assumption. My mother’s cold and cruel voice spoke in my head. Assumptions are what threaten the delicate balance of power, but proof of wrongdoings will enable you to wage any war. Heeding my biological mother’s advice, I followed the tiefling as she rounded the corner and made haste towards the servants’ wing of the castle. I prayed to any and all gods listening that I could find out what that shapeshifter was hiding.

[jpitha]

Hidden Depths 19

Awakenings 1 2 3 4Hidden Depths 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18Hidden Depths: A Side Story Hidden Depths: Another Perspective

Alia, being the only biological person, ate her dinner with gusto. Gord took a few bites to be polite, but stuck with coffee. Lucas, who never really liked the idea of eating anyway, just sat.

"So, how's the colony?" Alia asked, as she went for another serving of pasta.

"Eh, it's not much to speak about." Gord said. "The planet is much too dry for the K'laxi, so they really only have the one town and that's it. All the excitement happens on Starbase."

"Oh? Tell me about it."

"It's pretty great. It's the first joint Human/K'laxi place we set up, so it's been around the longest. Humans and K'laxi have been living together for more than a century there."

"Wow, the things you miss while you're in hibernation for five hundred years." Alia giggled. "Tell me about the K'laxi. How are they?"

Gord smiled. "They're pretty great. They come from a planet that is almost, but not quite Earthlike. Smaller, lighter, around a sun that's more orange, and get this: they don't have seasons."

"No. Way."

Gord nodded. "God's honest truth. Their planet is straight up and down, no tilt at all, and their orbit is practically a perfect circle. It's basically a cool fall day there every day, all the time."

"What are they like?"

"Every one I've met has been incredibly nice, no exception. You've seen photos?"

"There was one, her name was Fellmeli I think, who sent us the messages."

"Oh yeah, she's one of the Administrators of Starbase. Good head on her shoulders. Anyway, so you've seen them. Those ears of theirs? They're very expressive. They practically do all of our facial expressions with their ears. Takes a minute to learn them, but once you do it's innate. Same with their tails. They're prehensile, they can move and grab with them. They get along well with us and humans too. I know of at least a few pairings that wound up in marriage and a K'laxi dating a human and vise versa is no big deal. K'laxi serve on human ships and humans have posted to K'laxi ones."

"Wow. So we have new friends in the galaxy" Alia said

"That's just it. New friends." Gord said smiling.

"That's nice and all..." Greylock cut in. "But you and Lucas and Resort and Express wouldn't be here if it was all fluffy bunnies. Fellmeli said that there was an incident. What's going on?"

Gord's face darkened. "Venus. Venus is going on."

Alia looked surprised. "The resort planet?"

"Not anymore. They've decided they would rather be in charge than fleece vacationers. They built up a navy in the last one hundred years and took over the Sol system. I think the OPA is holding their own, but it's probably just because they're so small and spread out. Earth is under Venus' control and they set up a Vichy government. Previously, they let Earth manage the colonies but it looks like they're tired of that. When I left there was a Venusian dreadnought and troop carrier coming into the joint Starbase."

Alia shrugged. "That's bad for Earth, but I don't see how the colonies care. One government to complain about is basically the same when you're between 25 and 200 light years away."

"Alia, they don't think AIs are people."

"What? That's ludicrous. That question was answered two millennia ago."

"I know, I know. I was there. And yet. They think I'm not a person and have decided to enforce that ruling."

"Well fuck them then. We gotta stop them." Alia finished her dinner. "How do we help?"

Back in the Mindspace, Gord looked at Greylock. "Hey Greylock, you have the cargo manifest?"

"Got it right here Gord. I think I see where you're going. We have a light Frigate, a heavy Destroyer, a cargo ship and a smaller dry dock class printer."

So three ships, and we just so happen to have three folks here who have the ability to pilot them." Gord said, grinning. "Lucas, you want to be a Frigate again?"

Lucas shrugged. "Sure, I can do that."

Gord clapped him on the back "Beauty. Greylock, I've got some ideas about the ships, let's see about applying some upgrades before we link in. Shouldn't take too long to print since you have such large printers. Did you get the wormhole generator and ancillaries done?"

"We got it done a while ago Gord." Alia says. "Ran the simulations too, it should work fine."

"Excellent. Greylock, I'm going to toss you some plans, let's get those printers cooking and get these ships upgraded. I want to have a surprise for Venus when we link in."

Greylock looked at the plans. “You sure, Gord? These look…suspicious.” Gord grinned. “I’m super sure. Don’t worry. They’ll work a treat. I’ve done it before.”

Greylock raised an eyebrow but said "You got it Gord, I'll get the printers going and the remotes can do the installs while we brake."

While Gord and Greylock were talking, Lucas turned to Alia. "Alia, can I ask you about your augmentations?"

She side-eyed Lucas. "Maybe, Lucas. What do you want to know?"

"Well, you volunteered for it right? Why?"

"Oh that's easy. I thought it would be really cool to be able to connect directly to computers and possibly be able to get upgrades to my body."

Lucas was taken aback. "That's it?"

Alia nodded "Why? What's wrong with that? Do you know how much stuff Humanity has done because it seemed like a cool thing to do?"

"I guess." Lucas looked disappointed.

"Wait, you were thinking there was some kind of underlying reasoning for me wanting to become a cyborg? Not really. I saw the ad asking for volunteers on the subway as I was headed to my dead end job and thought it looked neat and so I signed up." She shrugged. "It was super cool, and look!" She gestured "This is WAY better than just being a nobody who works at a coffee shop. I'm co-captain of a colony ship!"

Lucas changed tactics "Okay, but why is Gord always grumbling about the program and why does he always look pained when he speaks about it - if he speaks about it at all?"

Now, Alias face was serious. "The program was a failure. Most humans who underwent the surgery died. Either from infection or from their bodies rejecting the mods or from the mods themselves causing problems."

Lucas' eyes went wide. "How many people were a success?"

Alia thought a moment. "I don't remember." She turned and looked at Gord. "Hey Gord, how many people survived the cybernetics trial?"

"14" Gord said flatly.

"And how many volunteers were there?"

"Two hundred and seventeen made it through the screening. There was over ten thousand applicants before we closed the application process."

"Oh." Was all Lucas could manage. "Why didn't it effect you?"

Alia looked thoughtful. "I don't know really. My mods were all computational and brain augmentations. I wasn't on the group that did limbs or organs." She thumped her chest. "I'm all meat here." She pointed to the base of her brain and her eyes flashed blue. "I'm computer here. Maybe that was part of it."

"Are you glad you did it?"

"Sure. Look. By the time I came on, Gord and his team knew that it probably wasn't going to work. I was in the last accepted group before the program was shut down. I probably have the latest versions of the mods, the ones most likely to succeed. If they had kept the program going, they probably would have been able to make it work for just about everyone. People got spooked though at the deaths, and so the funding was pulled."

"For good reason." Gord said. "We should have stopped sooner. Over two hundred people died for no good reason."

"Gord, we've been over this. They knew the risks. Hell, I remember you telling people that it was going to be harder than you had thought and that people's bodies were rejecting the mods, and anyone could leave the program at any time and receive a full payout. How many people left?"

"Three." Gord said sadly. "The only smart ones in the group."

"Don't be mean Gord." Alia chided. "You know how medical trials go. The people that don't want the tech don't sign up. Everyone who was left knew what they were in for."

"So you think the program should have continued?" Lucas asked, carefully."

Alia nodded. "Yes. I am biased because I made it through, but I see a real benefit to my mods. It's easier for me to come in and out of hibernation, I can interface directly with AIs and computers, I learn languages just by loading the software, I can even be taught gross motor skills. Refinement takes practice, but it's a real shortcut. Look!"

Alia gets up and from a standstill goes a backflip. "That? I didn't know how to do that until I was modded. Now, I can do a backflip. It's not super useful, but it's a great demonstration. I really truly believe that if more people got cybernetic mods this whole AI aren't people thing would disappear. The differences would blend until people would barely be able to tell!."

"Or the anti AI folks would have a whole new group of people to oppress." Gord added darkly.

Alia was sanguine. "I think in the end, most people are generally good and want to do good where they can, how they understand it. If we were able to get the side-effects of the cybernetic mods curtailed, people would jump at the chance."

"The point is moot anyway." Gord said "Nobody will open up that can of worms again."

Alia raised an eyebrow and looked at Lucas. Lucas said nothing and shrugged.

"Okay, so Gord. Tell me about next steps. We have to stop right?"

"That's right Alia. We're going to thrust at a combined eighteen gee to get you slowed down relative to Starbase in 4 days or so, then we'll activate your wormhole generator and link all of us over. Venus doesn't know what we're doing and doesn't know about Mt Greylock, so it'll be a complete surprise. Then, between our ships, the colony ship, the Starjumpers and any help Chloe was able to scare up, we should be able to run Venus off."

Alia looked at Gord. "That's your plan??"

"Yes?"

"Gord, that's so..so you." She said, exasperated. "That's barely a plan at all! It relies on so many external factors going exactly the way you expect them to."

"Chloe knows her stuff. She'll get us help. She can link beacons around to the colony worlds and to the other AIs, they can also send folks to talk to the K'laxi direct. It won't be just us. Trust me Alia." Gord said gently.

"I do Gord, you know I do." She thought. "Okay, eighteen gee is probably fine for you all, but what about me? How am I-" and she glared at Gord here "-and all fifty thousand people in hibernation going to do it?"

"That part is actually easy." Greylock said. "You'll just get back into your hibernation cabinet. Everyone already there will be fine. I'll adjust the pressure settings and make sure they're oriented flat to the plane of acceleration. They can take it fine."

"But, I'll need to be awake to coordinate. I can't go back into hibernation."

"And you won't. You'll maintain your neural link and be completely in the Mindspace, coordinating with Gord, Lucas, Express, and Resort. You just won't be able to use your body for a while then."

Alia looked skeptical. "And you're sure that'll work."

Gord spoke this time. "It'll work. I've talked it over with Greylock. Your mods will take over the heavy lifting while you're under, but you'll still be there, you'll still be you and you'll be helping us while we brake and coordinate our response. In fact you're going to have to pilot one of the ships."

"By myself? I've never done that before!"

Gord smiled "First time for everything. It'll be fine. You're helping out with a big colony ship. A Heavy Destroyer is nothing."

Alia looked surprised. "You just asked Lucas to be the Frigate. I figured you were going to be the Heavy Destroyer."

Gord waved his hands dismissively. "Nah nah, I'll be the cargo ship. Greylock and I have added new toys to it and it's more my speed anyway. I've been a warship. That's not for me anymore."

Express chimed in now laughing. "Don't worry Alia, we won't haze you about your first run as a ship."

"At least, not too hard." Resort said also laughing.

Gord looked at both of them "Be nice you two. I remember when both of you were newbies. Did I make fun of you?"

"Constantly." Express said.

"Every time you saw me." Resort said.

"Yeah, well it was done out of love." Gord said grumbling. "Anyway, we'll get you in your cabinet, and moved over to the Destroyer. You'd ride things out there, and when we link in you can launch and we can kick some Venus ass."

"Gord." Lucas said seriously "What about naming?"

"Hmm? Gord looked over at Lucas."

"The ships in Greylock are just empty shells right? We have to name them when they get occupied."

"Good point." Gord said, nodding. "I knew there was a good reason to keep you around. Yes, the ships will need to be named." Gord thought for a moment. "I'll take the name...Gordian Knot."

Everyone groaned.

Lucas said "Really? Really Gord? Fine. I'll be...Friendly Wave"

Gord laughed. "Hah, I like it. Ironic." He turned to Alia. "Okay hon, your turn. What's your new name going to be?"

"Hmm...I'll be Superliminal. Because I got here the slowest, right?"

"A little on the nose, but it has a nice ring to it." Gord said. "Okay, get to your cabinet. Lucas and I will wheel you in and strap you down and get the connections set. Then we'll go over to our ships and do the same."

"Hey Alia?" Greylock said.

"Yes Greylock?" Alia looked at her old friend. In the mindspace, Greylook smiled sadly. "Thanks for being captain with me. We did good work together."

"Oh Greylock." Alia ran over and hugged her friend. "We did great work. And it's not done yet. We still have to get our passengers home and kick some Venusian ass."

"Damn right we do." Gord said. "Let's go everyone. We've got a busy schedule"

Part 20

[matthew-gray-gubler-lover]

October 31st: Halloween

It is officially Halloween, the day of costumes, candy, trick or treating, and the day that you spend all day watching the Halloween movie marathon, eagerly awaiting the nightfall so you can show off your costume.

" it's Halloween!" Matthew said with such joy.

" yes, it is. I'm so excited to show off our costumes and to give out our Gubler M&Ms to the little Trick or treaters"

" i can't wait to see everybody in their costumes and see how happy they are with their goodie bags and comment everybody on their costumes and people who just come dressed in T-shirts and say this is my costume. Always one of the greatest nights of the year" matthew explained all the details that he was looking forward to today

" and don't forget we have our gourmet popcorn to eat while we watch the Halloween horror movie franchise marathon" i reminded Matthew.

" how could I forget eating pumpkin spice flavored popcorn on Halloween? This is going to be amazing."

After breakfast, we put on the Halloween marathon we spent the day watching the scary movie until it was time for us to put on our costumes and get ready to pass out the candy to the trick or treaters.

We put on our costumes Barbie and Ken we felt that it was the perfect couple costume.

" oh my gosh, you are the best-looking Ken doll I have ever seen in my life" i told him.

"well thank you and you are a beautiful Barbie" he told me.

Trick or treater came, and we were so excited we opened up the door and she was a Barbie herself a little 8-year-old barbie.

"we match" i told her before putting a goodie bag and a bag of Gubler M&Ms.

Matthew and I had so much fun passing out the candy and commenting on all of the trick or treating costumes until the final bag of candy was given out. We didn't have any more. All 200 bags gone.

" so I guess we go out and trick or treat now" i asked Matthew, shrugging his shoulder, not really sure if we should be going out at our age. Trick or treating.

" i think it will be OK even if the people don't want to give us candy, we can at least show off our costumes" Matthew answered.

We walk up and down the street showing off our costumes. A few of the people did give us candy i had a bright pink plastic pumpkin that went great with my hot pink Barbie dress.

When we come back home, we see all of the decorations that's all over our front yard. Even though we've seen them all month long, there's something a little bit more special about it when you see it on actual Halloween.

" it's 11:59 PM" Matthew told me, a little sadness in his voice as he looked at his watch since Halloween is one minute away from officially being over.

" yeah, it is Halloween is almost over. That sad but we had a really amazing October and I enjoyed every second of it, I told him as I took his hand.

"I did too, and I look forward to spending the rest of my Halloweens with you" he told me.

"and i look forward to spending the rest of my Halloweens with you, i think we need to go to bed now, I'm really tired" i told him with a yawn.

Bonus part November 1st

It is now November 1st and Halloween is officially over i make their morning coffee and walk into the living room and notice that Matthew isn't there. I see him out our front window, sitting in our front porch swing it is a nice cold November morning i'm wearing a white pullover sweater, tan pants, and white fluffy boots.

I see Matthew wearing his tan teddy bear sweater i walk out onto the front porch and hand him his cup of coffee. Now that I have put our Halloween mugs away, I have taken out our fall mugs. They are white and have fall leaves on them.

When I go Out the door, I noticed that Matthew has a blanket on him that says Happy Fall

" here's your coffee, honey" i said, handing him the mug of hot coffee.

" thank you ,i'm just sitting out here enjoying the nice fall air make it back in before the coffee was done. But time got away from me just sitting here looking at the leaves and the trees and all of our Halloween decorations that need to be taken down now"

" yeah, they do. It's sad, really. We worked so hard on it. But we leave the scarecrows out until Thanksgiving, so the front yard shouldn't be too empty" i said before taking a sip of coffee.

" that's true you know what that means once Thanksgiving is over then we get to decorate for"

" Christmas!" we both said at the same time.

We both laugh at how we said it at the same time

" plus, we get to look forward to decorating the lawn for Halloween next year" matthew adds.

" yes, we do"

We both sit on the porch, swaying slightly, swinging back and forth, watching the leaves fall from the tree. one lands on the blanket that we're sitting underneath.

" the first leaf of November" matthew says, picking it up " maybe I should make a November leaf photo album for us to go with our Halloween and Christmas albums"

" i like that idea" I told him as I snuggled up closer to him, putting my head on his shoulder and sighing.

Both of us looking forward to the many adventures that await us for the rest of this year, and looking for of the adventures that we will share together for the rest of our lives.

So much for reading the 31 Days of October with Matthew Gray Gubler. I have enjoyed writing these so much and I hope that everyone enjoyed reading them.

[gallifreyshawkeye]

Chapter 8 of Reclaimed. I actually wrote an almost 11K chapter in a week, y'all! Boom! 😄

Summary:

Aziraphale accidentally discovers inconsistencies with the A(a)rchangel rosters and that there are potentially multiple archangels that have simply vanished. He also gets a message from Furfur who wants to meet, and the message is brought by an unknown angel who reminds Aziraphale so much of a certain red-haired angel that it can't be coincidence. Meanwhile, Crowley is pushed beyond his limits to the absolute brink by Satan and remembers a secret experiment he had worked on shortly after the Fall and that he had kept hidden in case he ever needed it. He hadn't for so long he had completely forgotten about it. Until now. And it might save his life.

Excerpt:

“Supreme Archangel! Sir!” 

Aziraphale turned around to see a breathless angel dressed in… khaki trousers with a black belt, a button-up sea-foam green shirt with rolled up shirt sleeves, a black tie, and dark grey shoes?! waving his hand to get Aziraphale’s attention while finishing jogging up to him from the opposite end of the long corridor. The angel leaned over as he reached Azirapale and rested his hands on his knees, catching his breath before standing back up and arching his shoulders back while taking a deep breath and finally settling into a normal posture.

“Whoo I should probably run more,” the angel said, “Hate running though. Frightfully boring. And so awful . I do not understand the humans and angels who do it on purpose. I mean, the idea sounds nice, especially the endurance running stuff. You know what I’m talking about? It’s where humans go for, like, 50, 100, 200 miles on purpose through, like, deserts and wilderness? Now that would be an accomplishment and super cool. But the training for that?! No. Couldn’t do it. Not in a million years. I bet demons don’t run on purpose. Ever. Or maybe they do because it’s awful. No, wait! I bet it’s, like, something they’d wager for the loser in a bet like, ‘I bet you 50 laps around the Infernal Pit that….’ uh, I’m not sure what demons would bet on. Maybe that one of them didn’t know that Beethoven actually did write a 10th symphony? He did, you know. Did you know that? But you get the idea. That’s how terrible running is.” The angel grimaced and took another deep breath like he needed to fill the very bottom of his lungs. “Whooo, that’s better!”

Aziraphale was staring in utter, boggled astonishment. Never in his existence had he met another angel like this one. Well, aside from Crowley-ish. When the demon was devoid of carrying the fate of the universe, this was not remarkably dissimilar to how Crowley could get on those rare occasions when he felt safe and uninhibited and got going on a subject he was passionate about whether it was passionately negative or positive. Who was this angel?! 

“Can I help you?” Aziraphale asked at last when the unknown angel in front of him didn’t say anything further and simply stood there, rocking back and forth from the balls of his feet to his heels while absent mindedly swinging his arms and… humming? something under his breath.

“What? OH! Right! Yes!” The angel’s eyes jumped back from wandering around the large corridor to focused on Aziraphale’s vicinity like he’d completely forgotten that he’d been the one to grab Aziraphale’s attention in the first place.

[partmathpartmagic]

masterlist i guess?

i am working on getting these all on tumblr but it'll be a minute!

Give me six months (formerly Disarmed)

“I think, my love, that if we survive this, I have some work to do.”

Mina/Astarion | 11/11 chapters | Mature (I'll mark the smut chapters!)

This began from the idea that Astarion's friendship ending feels (to me) like his most happy and self-actualized ending, and maybe he needs those 6 months on his own before he can have a romantic happily-ever-after.

But it turns out she was used to being the one in the relationship with her shit together and when that's no longer the case she has some shit to figure out as well...

This is so fluffy, y'all.

Read on AO3: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 (very mild smut) | Chapter 10 (actual smut) | Chapter 11

Read on tumblr: only chapter 5 is posted here so far (because it's my fave and it stands alone decently) but i will update as that changes!

A flip of a switch (formerly At Your Mercy)

Being as beautiful as he was, people wanting him the way they certainly seemed to everywhere they went, it must be impossible for him to feel safe anywhere. To feel whole. To feel like a mind attached to a body rather than floating outside of it. Gods, but he had such a good mind. … Did he know that? What if he didn’t know that? What if he thought she only wanted his body? Surely he wasn’t that dense? Oh gods, she realized. He absolutely is.

Mina/Astarion | 6/6 chapters (for now) | Mature

A prequel to Disarmed, picking up a few nights after the tiefling party/the first time they sleep together. Focuses a lot on Astarion working through his shit, the two of them figuring out sexual and non-sexual intimacy, all that good stuff. Also very fluffy. I took destiny into my own hands and changed the title and I don’t hate it anymore!

Read on AO3: chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | chapter 5 (smut) | chapter 6 (smutttttt)

Read on tumblr: only chapter 6 posted so far

The Gift

"I left you alone, and I’m sorry, and it kills me knowing I hurt you, but everyone is going to leave me alone in the end, even you.”

Rielle/Astarion | 4/? chapters | smut-free just sad as hell

Rielle hasn't seen Astarion for two centuries, and then he shows up at her art show (where several of the paintings are of him) for a painful reunion.

This is set 200 years after the events of the game, so the only surviving members of the core party are Rielle (tav), Astarion, Halsin, and Shadowheart, and Halsin and Shadowheart are near the ends of their lifespans. It's about Astarion wrestling with losing the first people he ever allowed himself to care about and the fact that he's an immortal spawn who's just going to keep losing people- is it even worth loving them in the first place?

If you can't tell this is just pure angst lol I am hurting my own feelings by writing this fic

Read on AO3: chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | chapter 5 | chapter 6

Read on tumblr: chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 6

And isn’t that just like a sister?

"She wants to destroy you—but with her, for the first time, you think you make sense."

Female Durge/Astarion | 2/2 chapters | smut-free

An exploration of Durge and Astarion's complicated relationships with their sisters. I edited these minimally so they're a little more stream-of-consciousness. Ch 1 is Durge pov (2nd person though, you are Durge and Durge is you) and ch 2 is Astarion pov.

Read on AO3: chapter 1 | chapter 2

Read on tumblr: chapter 1 | chapter 2

We Were

“If the timing had been different, do you think we ever could have been in love?” “We were, darling.”

Female Reader/Gale/Astarion | 2/2 chapters | smut-free

You and Gale are happily married, but an old friend's wedding gets you thinking about the past and how things might have been different. Bittersweet and sad in the way life is sad.

Read on AO3: chapter 1 | chapter 2

Overlooked

You ask yourself, gently: what if you were the one he wanted to kiss? What if you were the one he looked at with those big, round, trusting eyes? Impossible, you think, and your mind pushes the thought away instinctively, but you hold it in place, letting your thoughts adjust.

Female Reader/Astarion | 2/2 chapters | smut-free for now?

You and Astarion are besties, but he's been really weird the past few weeks and you don't know why... friends to lovers and slow burn, will likely end with some smut

Read on AO3: chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 | chapter 4 | chapter 5 | chapter 6 | chapter 7 | chapter 8 | chapter 9 | chapter 10 | chapter 11

[filipinosamflynn]

RED RISING BOOK 1 CHARACTER TIER LIST + FULL THOUGHTS! >:D

Below is my review of book 1, I'll go into spoilers. After this, I'm either gonna move onto a different book or try to find golden son. Not sure which one will happen.

But yeah, great book, 4 stars, or 8/10! Definitely just set up for things to come in the trilogy, but also a really good setup & story.

PREFACE: This is from the perspective from somebody who DOESN'T read books for fun too often. Red Rising was the first book in a long while I chose to read for fun since Harry Potter in 1st year high school (I didn't even finish the series, I stopped at the start of Half Blood Prince). So you're dealing with one of the most casual guys who went into the series. Another thing: I came into the series thinking it would be similar to Nimona (2023) or Sylas's story from League, since I brought up these two things when I first asked for book recs, so my expectations were HORRIBLY wrong (kind of, sylas's lore is pretty similar and the only difference is that sylas gets STRAIGHT into action but also his characterization sucks). So my perspective is strange, is what I'm saying, and I am far from the most valid person to be seriously reviewing this book. I'm just sharing this for fun lmao :P

I'm just writing the first few things that come to my mind, so stick with me people! These are messy, unfiltered thoughts.

This book is rough, really whumpy at the start of the book, but it's good whump. It's just setting up and establishing what's to come and to make all the payoffs feel better by showing us the insane suffering Darrow goes through. But also? Damn. That was rough. it felt like grimdark (this is coming from the perspective of a guy who actively avoids all things grimdark - with the exception of whump fanfics on ao3).

And then we get into the institution, and I just went, "oh. This is hunger games harry potter." I was a bit disappointed to be honest, I know the book is called "red rising" and it literally means "the slow rise of a red" so he still needs to prepare himself for what's to come, but also... eh?????? Someone in Reddit called this segment "pierce brown kidnapping fans of the hunger games when it was at the peak of its popularity", which ✨️iconic behavior✨️ but I was a bit confused as we took this academy stuff seriously. But slowly, I grew into it when the characters started interacting. I liked it when Darrow was interacting with others since the first half of the book felt so isolating. I liked every single scene Sevro shows up since he brings so much chaos and fun to a story that had so much downtrodden underlying sadness. The chapter 9 reveal is still hitting me, like "damn FUCK THESE GUYS BRO, WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS PLANET HAS ALREADY BEEN TERRAFORMED???" Also because sevro's fucking awesome, but that's besides the point. The same goes for Darrow's scenes with Virginia and pre-sword fight Cassius, but they aren't as iconic as Sevro.

Darrow is a super compelling protagonist for the story he's in. Making him this power fantasy fulfillment guy makes things feel all the more liberating when he beats the shit out of a guy, it's sort of like a shonen anime protagonist, I guess (i don't watch anime btw). Bro talks about Eo a bit too much though 💀 it got to the point where it got a bit funny, but some moments do hit... before virginia came into the picture as the better love interest since she's girlboss and eo is seraphine from league of legends.

Most of the characters are well written or awesome! The proctors are real loveably hateable pieces of shit I wanted 200 feet below the dirt, and I loved seeing them get beat up. Except you Fitchner, you are iconic, and you gave us Sevro. I love you. Antonia, Cassius & Jackal are just set up here, and it's mildly disappointing? I am super happy the finale ended up being "FUCK THE PROCTORS" but also that stole time away from finishing off the inter-student conflicts. Yeah those will 100% be explored in the rest of the books with more time to do so, but damn :/ the last time we see Antonia, I think she just stands there at a castle to remind us she exists??? Whatever, watching the proctors get shit on was exactly what I needed to want to see more out of this series.

I was a bit disappointed when Darrow ended up being the only red we explore in this book. I was kind of disappointed when Darrow just speaks with a gold accent the entire time, I hope later in the series he speaks like a red again because I have a red bias and hate fancy ass shit. From a book called "red rising", there aren't too many reds after part 2 which I found odd for a revolution story about a red taking control over the system. Titus? Ohoh! FUCK HIM! why did they write him to be this rapist guy, and he just exists to let darrow know he isn't the only fake gold at the institute. I was mildly hoping we would get to see another red-turned-gold team up with darrow as a 100% trustworthy ally since I felt like we needed it after all the loneliness Darrow goes through, but sadly no :(

OH AND THE ACTION SCENES HELL YEAH!!! Reddit wasn't kidding when they talked about how bloodydamn GOOD the fight scenes are. I got spoiled that "Clang! Clang! Clang! Confess!" means something, and I don't even know who is fighting who, but I want to read the whole series just to get to that point because it sounds badass.

But uhhh this series came to me at a rough point in my life. It was hard to read some parts of it and I took a few breaks. Yeah, I read the whole thing in 2 weeks, but also just to fill myself with some sort of closure when I felt sad. I felt good coming out of it, but during? UHHHHHH-

These disorganized thoughts are getting messy, if you have any questions about specific things, comment them for me to answer. I might. 🥰

Story: 7/10, just set up but good set up

Characters: 9/10, bloodydamn good, almost all of them. I can tell, despite my initial disappointment for some of them since I know this is a book SERIES, so we will be seeing more of them soon.

Personal Enjoyment: ????/10, felt too sad at some points, absolutely adored this book in others.

Quality: 9/10, amazing writing, I want to buy all the books JUST to support Pierce Brown, I'm not even sure if I will be reading them, I just feel like throwing money at him.

Overall Score: 8/10, scared to continue, but damn I want to continue.

[lucientelrunya]

Twenty questions for fic writers

Tagged again by the wonderful @forerussake, thank you!! <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

10

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

446,816

3. What fandoms do you write for?

At the moment only DMBJ and those are the only fics I've posted on AO3. I've written for other fandoms before and posted those on other sites, mostly HP and original works. I've also written things for Sailor Moon, Stargate, Lord of the Rings, Grimm and Stanger Things but never finished those, so they were never posted (and most are veeeeeeery long ago).

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Like a lonely house (284)

The Crystal Menace (256)

Promise in the Dark (200)

We go deeper than the ink beneath the skin of our tattoos (76)

Stolen Moments (54)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yeah, always. Since I don't have that many fics on AO3 yet, it's not a lot to do and I love the interaction with readers, love hearing about their theories, what they liked and all that. And I want them to know how much I appreciate that they took time to write a nice comment and how happy that makes me! And as a reader myself I love it when authors answer my comments, too.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Ooof. Everything I write is angsty and hurt/comfort. But I guess the angsties one would be The Crystal Menace, because it's the first part of a trilogy and the ending is quite sad and gives a bleak outlook for the future. But it's not the real ending of the whole story, so I'm not sure it should count?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hmmm, actually everything I write has a happy ending (you know, and if it's not happy then it's not the end). But I think the truly happiest ending would be Like a lonely house because at the end Zhang Rishan is truly happy for the first time in a very long time.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Hmmm, very long ago one of my original ffs got a very unkind comment, but I'm not sure that should be considered hate, the person was still civil and I don' even remember much. So, I'd say no :)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do. It's not always the easiest thing to write, but when the muse strikes, I greatly enjoy it. I'm not sure what different kinds of smut there are? I do write PWPs that are just about the sex, but I also do smutty last chapters to long-fic.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Uhhhh... I think I might have started one or two, once upon a time when I was a teenager. But I never got very far with those, my focus tended to shift a lot more back then. I don't know if I would write crossovers today, at least not classic crossovers. But fusions are very interesting, like putting characters from one fandom into the world of another fandom, replacing the original characters. Or at least a world very inspired by another fandom.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so, no. It's already such a small fandom and since I only do one pairing the audience is even smaller. As for the older stuff, well, I might love the stories but they were objectively speaking very badly written so I don't think anyone would want to steal those.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Oh yes, almost all of my old stuff was co-written in role-play-style with someone else. But not big role plays, just me and my co-author creating characters and planning stories. Those were my teenage years and it took me very long to learn to write and do all the work all by myself.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Oh dear. I've had so many ships over the years and one I've written quite a lot is one I do not want to think about (because of the Terfling). I've been obsessed with FuBa for two years now and everything I've written since then is about them, so I'll say FuBa.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Definitely my Stranger Things ffs, those were the first things I started writing all by myself and I am quite proud of how far I did come with writing out a lot and not only the good scenes, but then my dad died and I couldn't really write for a year or something (until I hyperfixated on FuBa to kinda distract myself, I guess?) and the series kept on going and I didn't really like where it went, (I did mostly stop reading ffs after season 3 dropped), so I'm not sure I'll ever finish those.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I honestly have no idea. I just write what i want to read and kinda soldier on to get where I want to get.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

When I look at writing advice I always feel like I do everything wrong, but most of that advice sucks anyway XD. My weakness is definitely that I tend to get too many ideas and start too many new stories, keeping my focus on one and going through with it not easy. It gets easier when I post an ongoing fic, at least if I know people like it and are waiting for the next chapter :)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Hmmm, not sure about this. I wouldn't do it, I think, not even for languages I do speak. I can imagine different scenarios, like when a character ends up somewhere, where a language is spoken that the character doesn't understand. Mostly, if we are with that character, (first person, third person), we as the readers shouldn't understand the language as well and I would just say "says something in an unknown language". Because if characters speak a different language and it's relevant to the plot, then there has to be a translation and I personally would mark the dialogue as "spoken in X language", but still keep it english.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Oh dear. The first fandom I read was actually Stargate SG-1 and I think I wrote something for that? But it's so long ago, I'm not really sure. It might also be Sailor Moon, because I remember a weird crossovery story idea with Stargate. Who knows. That was more than 20 years ago ^^°°°

And also I remember a time when I had just learned to write and I wrote silly little one-page fairy tales that always ended with a happily ever after, so maybe fairytales are my real actual first fandom? XD

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Uhhh, this is a hard one because I love all my stories (even the badly written old ones). But it's Like a lonely house, I think. The first story I wrote (and finished!!) all by myself and my first story on AO3. And I still love most of it and re-read it frequently :)

Ooooookay, who to tag? Maybe @spinecorset, @daydreamorama, @elletromil, @lacommunarde, @s1utspeare, @kholran, if any of you want?

[37q]

so yall know i gotta lor sis righ. well. fuck dude. those obligations from earlier. part rant part support seeking skip to the very end for that second part

context. 17 y/o not in school, homeless, lowkey estranged from her parents. father is unemployed and lying abt it, abusive and his ego is constantly reacting to his material precaritys impact on his manhood, sits at my old shop all day doing nothing. mom, actually employed, covering for dad, also used to work at my old shop before being fired for stealing a stack of cash, getting worse w her precarity and also sits at the shop a lot a lot. no idea where her lor bro sleeps. no idea how old he is too, could be 12 in an 8 year olds body for all i kno

so i pick her up at 1030, we go to the mall and check the ubreakifix type place and they dont work on iphone 8s. bet. we have a spare XR she bought off her big bro. missing sim tray, got a free replacement from the shop. go to the apple store, the XR is permalocked unless factory reset from the icloud acct tethered to the device (truly dystopian imo), schedule genius bar appt for tmrw at 11. take her back to her friends house, the one i hired a month before i left so she could have a comrade and a place to stay nearish work that isnt her moms (although they were kicked out of their motel right when i hired steven i think. so, unhappy coincidence?).

sis works then so i drop her off at work at 9 and take her phone w me. go home come back to the mall. genius at the bar says its busted, whatever. not like i been sayin that. its missing like the bottom 1/5 of the backing like straight up exposed circuitry and she leans it on its bottom edge on whatever flat surface she can find at her perpetually wet food service job. refurbished options more expensive than the cheap 'new' products, not saying much tho. deliver busted phone and info to her -- her mom and dad are there ofc -- go home. later pick her up that night (last night) and drive her to her gfs in the heights. oh also dropping steven and their mutual friend off at stevens on the way. whatever its like literally en route its actually kinda perfect every time.

apparently im picking her up this morning. Okay. oh yeah shes locked out of her paycard account. she locks the card when shes at 0 in case she gets an auto withdrawal thatll overdraft her. she got paid today so she was gonna unlock it but how did she access her acct previously? thumbprint. no password memory whatsoever. pretty fair, id say? she texted me asking for the last 4 of her SSN this morning. nobody picked up her call to the bank(?) until she called them in the car with me. the form required to change login credentials when u dont have account access required those digits and a form of photo id. no ability to access it from her ADP because the pw changed at some point but it still took her print.

reminder. shes homeless and out of school. she has a birth certificate but thats where my certainty of her documentation ends. ive run into this before where i wanted to start a real bank acct for her but they require legally viable photo id and even non driver state ids require 1. proof of permanent residence (X) and 2. proof of enrollment in school for minors (X) at the MVA.

so anyways weve kinda hit a wall with the limitations her unsupportive parents / guardians have provided! its taking up a large portion of my emotional, mental, physical, and temporal space in life right now so i wanted to make a post about it. my little bandaid desire is to at least set her up with a new phone which i estimate would be $200 minimum for actual 'verified third party vendors of used phones' but ugh i didnt budget for this.

oh the support seeking! if you know me and wanna ease the load on my sisters shoulders a but, id be grateful for some help raising funds for a new phone! ill include some $ links. if were unacquainted but youre reading this anyway and have a spare $5 wed love the support! thanks for reading :)

cashapp: $rmwperfect | venmo: @rmwperfect | paypal: @37q

[xhybridm0mentx]

Day one: My Diary for CK3 that no one asked for.

It's been over a year since I played... I have a total of 125 hours in the game..and have the slightest of slight on how to play.

Date: 10/20/1070 AD

Name: King Malcolm III "Canmore" Of Scotland. Wife: Queen Ingebjorg Finnsdatter of Scotland

Children: Donald- Duncan- Malcom, & Taco my only daughter.

I forgot that I was an absent father and husband before I left the game. When I came back my wife and I had daughter named Taco. Little did I know, She had a hostile scheme against me... Well I made her a court physician. She tried to poison me! It caused me to be disfigured. Fighting for my LIFE I decided to murder her. Now I have a new wife, I must sway. My New wife is Brave,Generous, Sadistic, and a charming negotiator. She is 33.

I am at war with some Duke. I am in over my head, I have allied with Denmark, because I accidently betrothed my 6 year old son to his 16 year old daughter. And to Norway; for pretty much same reason.

The very disrespectful Duke Mael-Snechtai of Moray is starting a faction against me to be dethroned.

Mean while... My NEW wife just had TACO TACO! 2 daughters in the fam!

NOOOOOOO My new wife died from child birth to my third Daughter :(

1/8/1077 AD

My New new wife..already promising. She has educated Taco and Taco Taco; as well as My Heir Duncan.

I'm being over taxed; and I lost the first war. Lost 200 Gold. I did get tossed in jail by the Rude Duke above.

I did however escape! And now I am plotting his murder. The scheme failed twice, and only added hard ship and stress to my life.

Some how Taco Taco is in Jail..she's 3?!?! She remained in jail for 2 years.

Oh crud, I accidently hit on my Daughter in law AHH and she has the plague!

Holy mother it's now 3/8/1082 AD and I have 4 Grandchildren. Rick Sanchez, Snail, Ichigo, & Salami

I have almost to much stress due to me plotting the murder of the king who took my place.

I accidently betrothed my 2nd son to a lesbian, now I have no hope of a son for him. whooops

The end for now.

PS if you read this I hope you laughed, because this game is hilarious!

[animarune]

Hi how have you been?

I am still alive! Just turned 29 too!

I just saw a trans health care person to talk about my desire for top surgery. I have an appointment in two weeks to start going over paperwork for an application!

I just started my 6th season working in landscaping, after finishing block 1 of a horticultural apprenticeship. After block 2 next year I will write the Red Seal test and I will be certified to work anywhere in Canada.

I firgured out several years ago that I'm aromantic and bisexual, and polyamorous. I have a girlfriend and a boyfriend. I've been involved in the kink community in my city for almost a year. My friend just got me a Violet Wand for my birthday which is super fun~⚡ It's a neat zappy toy and I brought it home to show my family because I knew they'd all think it's cool too and I was right! (I knew, because when I was like 17 we had this electric fly swatter with which they all took turns hitting each other 😆)

I can't remember when we last spoke, but I was diagnosed with ADHD sometime when I was 21 or so, and last year I figured out that I'm autistic as well.

I moved out to go to college in 2016 and my cat Shadow died in January 2017 and it broke my heart and I dropped out. Completed the horticulture diploma program 2017-2019. In 2018 I got my cat Harley. She is the most precious purrtato.

I've been living with my friend and work partner for four years. We live in a small apartment with my cat, and her cat and three rabbits, and a brown anole who came from a house plant and hatched in our bathtub. Also, at least 200 isopods.

I'm still friends with Shika! We don't talk as often but that's okay. I took her to the MCR concert in Toronto in September and it was amaaazing!

I'm still into writing fanfiction but I still haven't finished anything lmao Currently (for like 8 years now) I'm writing a Dragon Age: Inquisition fic. I keep changing my Inquisitor's backstory lol

Oh! And I am beyond hyped for Tears of the Kingdom!!! It looks so freaking fun oh my gosh!!!

[blossom-adventures]

Hello friend! I have more questions XD

1, 8, 10

What is your writing highlight for this year?

My fic reaching 200 hits on AO3, I didn’t think anyone would be interested in it so seeing that counter reach so high in such a short amount of time was great, I might even get to 250 by Christmas

What 3 things are you looking forward to next year?

Progressing into the Dragonborn era of my story, which will include the Thieves Guild, Ulfric, the Civil War, Ulfric, and obviously the main story line… did I mention that Ulfric’s coming back? I did? Oh… sorry

Seeing what my writer friends on here come up with next, I’m bouncing between a lot of fics at the moment and I’m very excited to see where everyone’s stories lead

I’m thinking of potentially writing for more than just Skyrim, I have a well established character in the Dragon Age universe, and I’m slowly slipping into the Final Fantasy universe (specifically FFXV)

Which character turned out differently to what you had planned?

Jaina, she took the story and ran off with it, she has gained skills and head canons I hadn’t planned for her and I don’t want that to change