#//-be able to understand them otherwise
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Additional information post to go with a prior post about the Babel Bracelet because I forgot to include this detail. Whoops.
While the Babel Bracelet allows the user to speak and understand whatever language they want, it only translates spoken words. It does not translate written words. Signs and books? Try to read any of them with a Babel Bracelet on and you're not going to understand it, the same way you would if you weren't wearing one or never had one to begin with.
This is intentional, of course. A hinderance that's purposefully built into it to pressure the user into learning the language of their choice because again, it's meant to be used temporarily. It's not supposed to be a crutch, just a quick band-aid solution until the user learns enough to not need it anymore.
#//shaking my head at myself#//this is such an important detail idk how i forgot to mention it#//i say pressure but its more like this feature is intentionally left out BECAUSE its supposed to help with learning the language#//by only having them understand being spoke to and not reading it's supposed to be like a nudge into actually learning the language they-#//-want to know#//if that makes sense?#//also deeply ironic how it's not supposed to be a crutch and yet lambda relies on it to communicate with two of his friends bc he wouldn't#//-be able to understand them otherwise#//there's a reason for that but also dude! dude! sit down and actually learn! shakes him#//anyways yeah! more fun translator bracelet info! :>#hidden depths: {info}
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She came up with a new activity
#snake#snakes#Hognose#hognoses#pets#In her defense I also didn't realize the reason she couldn't move it at the end was because her tail was no longer under the basket#So instead of sliding over her it just bumped into her and was stuck#to her credit she did listen to me and follow my directions! But neither of us realized the problem.#ah it was cute while she did it#she was going a bit before I started recording#she comes up with silly fun activities#i should let her play with the hammock again#it's funny when she found it she'd gesture to me with her head when she wanted me to lift it and put it down#and it was like a weird elevator parachute game#i think she might have been extra delighted she was able to communicate her wants to me and I did them#We both got practice with that the other day when we played climbing ball#I misunderstood a few times#she is much more patient and less easily frustrated than her sister#she was asking for climbing ball and I thought she was asking for kisses#i did eventually figure out what she actually wanted#i suppose it helps she likes kisses too#when i say kisses I'm not putting my lips on her#I let her flick her tongue at the tip of my nose and make little kiss sounds at her#she either understands this is affection or otherwise likes it#Because she will often go to my nose and I'll give her kisses like this#I don't kiss her because the bacteria and stuff in my human mouth could be dangerous for her#I know reptiles and such can also have salmonella#But I'm really not worried about that part tbh as I keep my girls pretty clean#They are princesses#And know it
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Sitting outside during a storm, watching, listening; enjoying the rain and the lightning and the thunder and thinking of Lord Zeus.
Thinking about his stories; what I know and how much I know I'm oblivious to. Wondering what I can learn from him. Reminding myself to research him later.
Thanking him for the storm. For every drop, every flash; every rumble.
Thunderstorms are something we have always adored both collectively with my system and together with our family/mother. But this one was truly magical because I got to experience it with Lord Zeus in mind.
I love religion 💜.
#commentary#helpol#hellenism#hellenic worship#hellenic polytheism#hellenic polytheist#zeus#zeus deity#lord zeus#zeus worship#tagged commentary#For so long we were afraid of religion; angry at its existence.#It wasn't until fairly recently (with the last two years) that we've been able to expand our worldview.#Christianity and other Abrahamic religions may be major religions but they are also the exception.#Religion isn't supposed to be riddled with morals like everything Christians believe are expliclty sins.#Religion isn't supposed to be hateful and controlling.#Religion is beautiful and wonderful. It allows people to understand and appreciate the world around them and the things that happen to them.#It allows them to connect with supernatural beings (deities or otherwise) and find purpose and meaning and belonging in their lives.#Our religion with Aquarius saved our life (quite literally) and so will Hellenism. Like many others we thought Hellenism was dead...#Oh how wrong we were. This religion and this community and these deities are all wonderful and I am so happy to have found out about it all.#– Odysseus 👑#{{he/it}}#date — 10 August 2024
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im having the worst body day in a good while in terms of pain but i refuse to lay down. for there lies the road to the devil (mental health spiraling with nothing to distract from it). i SHOULD cook. but im not sure ill be able to with the pain. especially since the pain is because it feels like literally nothing is sticking together, like im much more bendy and hypermobile and useless than normal, which severely affects both motor skills and body strength. not to mention that this is causing a bad jaw day where so chewing is pain cause i already cant keep it in place and keep my mouth properly closed. i keep complaining but like, holy fuck i want off this illness ride
#i wanna paint my nails also but i dont need to i just feel like it and also thatd cause worse pain but also hhrhgghh#glitter................. sparkles.....#but also i wanna shower cause im cold but i wont be able to stand up right now AND handle potentially passing out#id like to not slip and injure myself if i can at all help it if thats not too much to ask...#man im typing and causing myself pain from it but like what else am i supposed to fucking DOOOOOO#GGRRREAAAAAAAAA#im struggling to comprehend how its NOT the norm to be like this#like what do you MEAN this isnt the default human experience. what do you mean there are people who are free from this#at first i didnt understand i was fucked up because everyone told me im overreacting and everyone has it#only to find out that no they fucking dont and ive been damaged beyond repair trying to reach other peoples ability level#like how do you NOT feel angry and bitter about that? i dont WANT to be but abled people sell you a fucking lie#and then punish you for noticing signs that somethings amiss. and then YOURE the one whos demanding for being burnt out beyond repair#and unable to pretend youre fine and just like them for their comforts sake. god im sorry im just so#i cannot explain this as anything else but an ongoing process of grief and trauma and mourning#and i want to believe in reincarnation solely so that i could have another chance at life#where im not sick and forced to continue giving up the only things that made this pain at all bearable in the first place#im sorry ill be fine or rather i HAVE to be fine because otherwise i dont know what to do with myself and thats crushing me from within#silvi talks#i need a tag for my stupid annoying whining about my fucked up flesh lmao
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The thing about Sylvester is the things that make him a great person make him a terrible Aub.
#ascendance of a bookworm#honzuki no gekokujou#Sylvester aub Ehrenfest#and controversially these are all traits Rozemyne has too#Myne can compartmentalize slightly better#SLIGHTLY#but she too cares too much about her ppl#but shes willing to help them in whatever they choose and not just decide for them#dont get me wrong she will still hulk out for her homies#the only thing keeping sylvester from doing the same is him being raised and socialized in yogertschmidt#also Myne has Ferdinand to keep her from doing anything too stupid#and eventually myne will understand and be able to temper her modern morals with that culture's nuance and then she'll be gucci😎#i had a whole essay written about my beloved sylvester#but this was my main point#i also think hes one of the most forward thinking nobles period#but i dont really know the others well the machine translation gremlins can tell me otherwise
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Uhhh tangent of a tangent. "Hb critical fans" looove spewing bullshit, 100%, but I do understand where much of their frustration with Stella's treatment by the fandom comes from, because you've literally got people opposing the idea that maybe developing a character past being a cardboard cutout of what constitutes as a "bad person" would be good for both the plot and the main characters' conflict with them
#the thing is. you kind of have to be able to afford a character that's ''just evil and that's it. born like that. nothing else''#and hb can't. for the simple fact that if you're going to (rightly) expect people to look at the mcs and the conflicts between Them#with understanding and sympathy and nuance#then you must extend that same ''grace'' to the villains. because you run the risk of trivialising the mcs' conflict with them otherwise#you can afford a character that's ''just evil'' even less when i can clearly see in my mind's eye how when put in a certain situation#someone might say ''ykw fuck it all'' and grow up to be the biggest piece of shit that there ever was#like at that point you Have to develop them#which is the thing with stella. (and striker. but the fandom doesn't bitch about Him nearly as much)#helluva boss#stella of the ars goetia#series#mytext#like if you go there with the mcs you can't Not go there with the villains. is the thing
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the way I've been raised has shown itself in a recent awful experience I had and the realization won't leave me because I'm not sure what to do about it.
I don't like feeling anger/upset and it's rare for me to feel it anyway but it's led to me being unable to tell what's worth getting upset over anymore. If my wants upset somebody, then, well, maybe I shouldn't have them? What is so serious that I need it to go completely my way...? What desires am I allowed to have. It's not that serious, it's okay if not, you can't always get what you want....
every time I feel Upset I am later wracked with guilt because it wasn't a big deal and I was just being selfish... What IS a big deal then? How can I tell? Its admittedly never a big deal... But I keep being upset. And stepped on....
#talkys#this is what led to me Staying for as long as i did#there would be issues but if I brought them up i wld then be made to feel guilty for feeling that way#but i cant reverse that bc well!! its true like is it really a big deal? life isnt that serious I dont need to get upset...#i get upset at something my parents do and in the end i feel ungrateful and selfish#i really cant tell anymore which is why i Stayed as mentioned above#in the sense of well yeah the way im being treated doesnt make me feel good but why do i need to feel good?#isnt that selfish...isnt that asking too much...isnt that making yourself out to be Better Than...#i really dont know. i get so ready to give up my position on anything because I dont want to be selfish#and because im no better than anyone else#my mom caused some drama on my birthday wrt my sister's family and it led to me not being able to go to the duck#pond on my birthday... which is the only thing i really wanted to do on an otherwise uneventful day#i was meant to feel shame abt it because well we can always go any other day!!! relax!!!#and it is true....!#we can go any other day why did i get upset? its not that serious...nothing is that serious...i feel so guilty + spoiled + selfish#i just felt humiliated for wanting to go in the first place. and for getting upset that we couldnt go. like a toddler.#*not that i actually get Toddler Level upset...but it always Feels like i did...ykwim#i just dont understand......idk if i can Repair this....
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fansites that blur the other members faces are so funny to me. like why. we know who he's standing next to.
#the concept of following them around but being like no ONLY this one guy#the others are not worth showing !!#strange as hell#like i'd understand if a bro looked bad in the bg and you decided to do him a solid and throw a blur but otherwise#not talkin about cropping bc they want to show off their fave thats normal#i mean the ones where they just put a blur for no reason. block their faces. could have cropped but didnt.#people overdo the akgae thing nothing wrong with having a fave but there has been a few accounts on twt ive come across#that actually do pretty blatantly only like 1 member and dislike the others and its so interesting to me#bc i just cant imagine being able to enjoy skz if i disliked any of them let alone most of them or all of them bar 1#like how are you going to a fanmeet and watching them all interact if you beef with 7 of them i cant understand it#are you even having fun or are you like grrr whenver they're all playing around ? how does it work?
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something something Adam's voice in the ending, going from flat and detached to melancholic and emotionally raw. His mannerisms and expressions, the sincerity and regret he carries openly, whereas in the beginning he was vague and secretive. Revealing himself with all his flaws, admitting to his mistakes and expressing his wish to save both the humans and the Andro-Edios even if no one were to believe his motives to be true. He holds no credibility with all that he had done and the manipulative ways he used to achieve his goals, but he remains earnest and doesn't hide behind excuses but rather shows the truth as it is with all its ugliness ... I think about this way too much ...
#* musings.#// there are many contradicting opinions about his motives towards the end#// but there's a sincerity and sadness in him that was too real to be a lie#// he did lie a lot but it was to maintain the continuity of his kind#// this is what bothers me in the fandom#// the argument 'well yeah but he lied'#// ... yeah of course he would#// everyone sees the story from the Andro-Edios' eyes but what about the only surviving human ???#// he had to live with those that slaughtered his people and even if he doesn't harbor that hate towards them anymore -#// im pretty sure he would prioritize humanity first#// he only had himself to survive he could trust no one and probably never would#// not to mention the guilt he carries for being the one who caused the wars and humanity turning into the monsters they are now#// he lied YEAH HE DID#// his wish to still save the Andro-Edios after everything that happened speaks of the humanity he has left#// being able to show remorse and try so very hard to atone and fix his mistakes is human#// I'm so over the hate he gets - the ending explained his reasonings and gave me a better understanding of him#// if I see the game writing him otherwise in the future I will simply ignore it ✋
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I wasn't prepared for how wanting a hug from a friend that's thousands of miles away would feel like a stab in the chest. They don't tell you that shit hurts and you can't do anything about it
#light vent#personal rant#vent except its mostly in the tags#vent#dare i say i wanna feel *safe*. dare i say i wanna be *warm*#who else out here yearning to be loved like you're truly worth something#there was a time when I was little that i wouldnt fall asleep unless i was bein held. cant go back to that without rlly having someone there#they don't tell you how isolating it is to only be able to hold friendships online. I think there's just something wrong with me#I dont get to feel warm and loved and safe irl. i cant remember the last time i did#i should be able to walk into my friends rooms and annoy them bc we know no ones really angry. BUT NO. other side of the country or canadian#i should be able to show them reels in a silent room where we laugh every so often but it's quiet otherwise#I should be able to give them random rocks I find but no#and i hate knowing im one of the only people who cant seem to hold a friendship irl. i wanna know whats wrong with me so ppl dont leave irl#what is so wrong with me that i cant love correctly? why cant i say i love you back? why does my chest tighten and i get scared? why why#its not fair?? theres gotta be something wrong with me for ppl to not like me irl i text first im nice i engage in their interests i help em#what am i missing?? we hang out for so long then BOOM ghosted. they were so cool and fun but no matter how many times i did anythin. NOTHING#i cant even say it's because i didnt get a cue or anything because they were autistic/adhd/disabled too. i didnt do anything mean did i?#i feel like im missing something that makes people human or something because i never know what i did and no one ever says i did anything#am i doing something wrong? do i like things wrong? do i love wrong? do i laugh wrong or smile wrong or talk wrong I DONT UNDERSTAND#the only place i feel safe and loved is with my friends online. they're *safe*. I'm not scared to laugh or talk. I feel at home with em#i havent felt at home in a while. they're all *home* to me. im glad y'all convinced me to make a server.
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local cry-baby complains about her sad little life and self-created problems again, pt 325
#i keep seeing ads for summer festivals and feeling sad because of no blind channel in them#sad because i miss them yes but also sad because if there's no BC it means i'm not going to music festivals next summer#as there's no other finnish band or artist that i care enough about to travel around the country for and pay those expensive tickets for#and none of the non-finnish bands or artists that i like ever come to finland#except for alvaro soler who has a gig in tampere#but it's at this festival for middle-aged people lol and i'm not sure i wanna go there alone#yes i can and likely will do it alone if i must. i actually have no problem doing things alone. i have done things like this alone before#but some things are just more fun NOT done alone ya know#and so. if i'm not going to music festivals i'm probably gonna do fuck all next summer#and that's just gonna be sooooo much fun 🙃 the brain absolutely loves that 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#my local music festival is gonna have max. 3 artists that i'd like to see. all performing on different days of course#and i don't like summer music festivals _that_ much that i'd pay for a 3-day ticket just for one artist per day#in fact summer festivals are pretty terrible lol there are so many people there and so many of them are drunk or otherwise annoying#and again i'd be going alone which only adds to the terribleness of the experience#BC was the only exception for me 😭#i would travel to another city and pay for an expensive ticket and tolerate all the terribleness of summer festivals#because i knew that the 50-60 minutes i'd get to spend with my boys (and my friends) would be worth it#and omg yes i understand how incredibly privileged i am for having been able to do so in the past summers#ultimately this rant is not (just) about blind channel
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i think a lot of people have never been in a truly desperate situation but think they have, and this causes them to pass really harsh judgment on people who made bad choices when either irrational or having no good choices to pick instead, and i really wish people could get some fucking self-perception and work on their compassion skills and not fucking do that as much anymore
#jack facts#people be banging on about empathy this empathy that#and like sure maybe people have a measurable capacity for it but i can tell you what#that sure as fuck don't mean any fucking one of them ever bothers to make use of it when it matters lol#and i mean on the other hand it's hard to conceptualize how you would feel going through something you've never experienced before#i just wish people would be AWARE of the fact they don't know!#or like that there's a difference between ''i can't afford anything but instant ramen'' and ''i can't get any food or water''#or a difference between being freaked out by spiders and having clinical arachnophobia#or a difference between ''my loved one is sick and i'm really worried about them'' and ''my loved one is dying in front of me''#etc etc etc etc etc#anyway the longer i live the more i'm convinced that empathy is a garbage concept#and actually a more reliable way to act with true compassion is through at least some capacity for relative objectivity#the ability to say ''i don't know how that feels and i cannot understand it through comparison'' and to be able AND WILLING#to take people's self reports on their feelings thought processes or lackthereof in good faith and with sympathy#and also the ability to acknowledge that doing a bad thing for good reasons does not negate the bad thing being bad#but also should and does change what consequences are appropriate and/or most effective#and also like............... things people do in desperation or other irrational states do not represent Who They Are As A Person#or what it's like to hang out with them in a day to day situation#another thing i keep getting more and more aware of is like. if y'all can't even handle an irrational or impulsive choice that does harm#done by an otherwise ''good'' person under short term desperate situations#that they then do their best to reduce the harm of after the situation is over#i can not even imagine how absolutely unforgiving you must be of anyone who has delusions#and i mean real delusions and real psychosis not the hyperbolic babytalk version lol#like i don't think most of you even know what the fuck a delusion even is the way you act about things as simple & straightforward as like#fear. hunger. pain.#absolutely fucking exhausting
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i think this is what happens when leftists avoid conservative beliefs and talking points as much as possible- to the point where they can't even recognize it when it's in their own spaces. you have to familiarize yourself with the enemies arguments to be able to actually have convictions you can defend. if a conservative brought up their fear of hormone blockers and the best argument you have is "well trans people deserve to exist and be happy", then you're not able to defend your beliefs, then your beliefs easily crumble when someone gives a more convincing counter argument to yours, and you could very well be convinced that person is right if you don't know better. learn their beliefs, educate yourself on the material, come back and correct them bc 9 times out of 10 conservatives are always making some shit up, its actually really satisfying to catch them on that and give them the correct information. but if you don't know how to do that you're no better than the average person who doesn't know what dogwhistles are and doesn't get what the big deal is about tolerating capitalism
#ignorance is bliss for you but suffering for everyone else#thinking x minority deserves x rights doesnt mean you know WHY they need those rights or how it even got this way#or what arguments the people against giving those rights are making to be able to counter them#theres a difference between passively accepting everyone bc you dont care about controlling ppl and understanding why you should#accept people and understand why they havent been and understand why its an injustice#its not that the first thing is bad- its good to not care what other people do- but its not enough to call yourself an activist.#educating yourself and being able to defend your beliefs are what makes you an activist.#i mean- whats the point otherwise if you're not changing minds? you're just a hippie who doesnt care. which is like. fine#but you're not an activist bc you dont care what ppl do. use yer feckin voice
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So there's this webserial called 'worm' about a world where superpowers started suddenly showing up in the 70's, and I'm trying so hard to think of a way to merge it with the stans-and-fidds 70s-and-80s plot events. The thing is, powers are caused by going through a traumatic event, and the powers are tied to both that event and to the person's various issues in ways that sometimes seems cruelly ironic. So you see my dilemma here, with there being so many options for events that could've given these guys powers
#godsrambles#fidds is easy: within worm's power classification system he'd be a tinker#which is where you get a superpowered understanding of how to create things that would otherwise be impossible#e.g. making killer robots far more advanced than current science is capable of#if working on the portal was what gave him powers though...... he could either get tinker powers specifically related to making portals#or if it was the greloblin then somethjng related to memory erasing#for stan. idk what would be the most upsetting. shapeshifting restricted to looking like other humans probably.#great for evading the law and for pretending to be ford for 30 years though#oh maybe ford would get precognition. ability to see hundreds of potential futures#maybe in combination with no longer needing to sleep. able to trap himself in literally endless rumination as he tries to figure out-#-how to stop bill#none of these are the Fun Flashy kind of powers though. stan would have fun with fire powers#oh wait. even worse for stan: powers that evoke leeches. able to temporarily steal or drain powers from others or something#or able to copy others' powers permanently in a weaker form than the original power. and he can have multiple weak powers at a time#in this world the mob would have powered folks in it of course so maybe a situation involving them could cause that power#OR. if his powers happened in the aftermath of the portal incident.#ability to teleport anything and anyone within his line of sight directly to him.#he'd be mad for 30 years straight about not getting that power before ford fell through the portal#that or the ability to summon common tools out of nowhere. such as a long rope#idk the powers are always very specific. pretty sure no one following me knows what worm is.#but you can at least appreciate the exercise of thinking up what powers would deal the most psychic damage to these guys
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i love not knowing if i'll ever be healthy again i love all of the time i've used to move my body become nothing i love spending my adulthood wasting away year after year for various reasons baby!
#i know i'm being dramatic and privileged etc etc right now but i hate living like this#i probably had covid in the beginning of august and since then my heart and lungs have just been fucked#so now i'm probably looking at at least 2 years of long covid and maybe permanent neurological damage#could i be lucky and get better in few more months? maybe. do i believe that will happen? no. optimistically maybe next summer id be better#my symptoms are not that bad considering what i know other people have suffered but at the same time that makes it feel not real#otherwise i'm pretty much fine except i feel like fainting alot after standing up or excerting myself and anything beyond walking#spikes my hr to 160 and right now even laying down my hr is around 80. this comes with the associated shortness of breath etc#what fucks me up about this is that my normal hr is low with my rhr being under 50bpm and i'm physically active#so basically i've went from regular running and half marathons being no issue to not being able to jog 1km at the slowest pace possible#without spiking my hr to zone 4#so now with the recovery time of this being however long if properly ever i'll have to basically start all over again with everything#i biked to the grocery store yesterday and that took me out for the rest of the day because my heart rate just didn't go down afterwards#outwards i look fine and i wouldn't be as affected if sports and moving wasn't a part of my life and relationships but it is#i've read studies about recovery times and a lot of them don't feel applicable because the test groups are either very different from me#based on the baseline health info such as activity levels or they're elite atheletes which i am not#some have given me hope that keeping my hr under like 130 by doing activities like walking until maybe someday things get better works#but who knows and even if it does this will be yet another thing that takes the littlest bits of muscle tissue i have on me away once again#because besides deconditioning muscle loss is yet another symptom. so i will be even weaker than i am right now#i don't know how much of what i'm experiencing in terms of mental effects is from anxiety over my physical health and how much is brainfog#but we'll see i'll just have to start walking a lot every day and keep up with simple and slow strenght training so i'll want to die less#i don't think my family will ever properly understand because almost all of them are athletes and the one who isn't never does any excercis#so either i just look like i'm weak but i was always weak so it's not a big deal or my experience isn't really that important#this is so so so pathetic both my reaction and the issue but it's difficult to not feel this way especially with the uncertainty#shit talking
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coos world was a good manga. but this little connection was special to me even if it didn't last long. kaya must've felt good connecting to renei like that during the journey, and getting to feel like a person again because of it. if she spent her whole life ostracized and called a ghoul being close to another girl and literally inhabiting her body for a short time must've been nice
#im honestly curious why this manga was so insistent on its muddled pedophilic aspects. the chapter in v2 where kaya/renei tries to get coo#to have sex with her (despite both girls not really understanding what sex is) was odd. especially in comparison to how renei talked#about her feelings for her brother otherwise/how coo talked about his pedophilic attraction to renei#like neither of them are able to take it seriously at all. but its still scary#especially coo trying to convince renei that the waking world was actually her dreaming. that made me uncomfortable#what could he have done to her if shed stayed :(? how could i trust anything he did after that
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