#// being able to show remorse and try so very hard to atone and fix his mistakes is human

[nyt1ba]

something something Adam's voice in the ending, going from flat and detached to melancholic and emotionally raw. His mannerisms and expressions, the sincerity and regret he carries openly, whereas in the beginning he was vague and secretive. Revealing himself with all his flaws, admitting to his mistakes and expressing his wish to save both the humans and the Andro-Edios even if no one were to believe his motives to be true. He holds no credibility with all that he had done and the manipulative ways he used to achieve his goals, but he remains earnest and doesn't hide behind excuses but rather shows the truth as it is with all its ugliness ... I think about this way too much ...

[chaoticallysapphic]

the great trial part five

summary: This was meant to be the easy part. The part filled with brightness and love. The war was over and you had the love of your life all to yourself. No more Baatar, no more secrecy and no more lies. But with the calm comes the realization as all the adrenaline finally leaves you. Now you know, this is the hard part.

a/n: Y’know I was reading part one yesterday and already our girls have come so far like they are still dysfunctional but it’s a lot healthier than before, especially if you read part one of tgd and than the latest part of tgt. We love to see growth. Thank you at @medeliadracon​ and @ladyxffandoms​ !

word count: 4k

The next few days are tense, at night you don’t put the barriers back up which Kuvira feared would happen, but you don’t make any move to hold her like you used to. You're stiff as a board until you fall asleep where your unconscious body seems to relax and you roll over to cuddle against her. You continue with the eye contact in the morning like always but you can’t get seem to get past fifteen seconds.

It’s unbearably quiet during the day, you’ve caved back into yourself to try and protect what little bit of your heart you have left. Kuvira doesn’t know but when you close your eyes that awful image reappears in your mind. That anger that still simmers within you wants to lash out again and push her away but you’ve worked so hard to get where you are that you rein it in and force yourself not to snap. 

It’s on the third day during breakfast that Kuvira suggests something, hoping it may help. 

“I think we should do the first exercise on Dr. Hanika’s list,” she says, her voice quiet and hesitant. You’ve been mostly silent, only talking when you need to and Kuvira’s respected that. She wants this to get better, not for the sex but because it broke her heart listening to you cry in the bathroom the other night. That face you made before you left the bedroom will forever be ingrained in her mind. 

“I don’t know…” You rack your brain as you try to remember what number one was. When you finally settle on it you're filled with an uneasy feeling pooling in your gut. 

Talk about your fears, be open, and accepting of what your partner has to say.

“Please Y/n, I think it’ll be good for us.” These past couple of months she’s used that word more than she ever has. The old Kuvira, the one who didn’t feel your blood on her hands, that didn’t think what she was doing was wrong, that felt no remorse would not believe her eyes if she saw what she is now. 

She admitted her mistakes in Republic City in front of the court, helped the Avatar take down what used to be her men, apologized to Baatar, and spends her days trying to atone for what she’s done to you. Out of all the things she regrets, hurting you is at the top of that list. 

You bite your lip before shakily nodding. You don’t want to hurt her but the fears you have are brutal and it feels like they’re killing you at times. Knowing what it feels like to be on death's door gives you the chance to know first hand how bad it truly is. And honestly, these images of another great betrayal hurt just as badly. 

“Uhm…” You wet your lips, you're so tense and you struggle to find the words. What do you fear? Lots of things, you fear Tigerdillos and Bolin five days without showering (it only happened once but the stench could have taken out an army). 

You fear she’ll leave you once her two years are up. Or better yet, she’ll keep you around like she did before but turn him into her little secret. You fear that once the anklet comes off, Kuvira will revert to her old self, and with time and self-reflection you’ve realized that the old Kuvira isn’t good for you. You fear that if she does turn into her old self, you won’t be strong enough to leave.

“I can start?” Her tone is soft, she never used to talk so calmly. Even in her softer moments, there was still that edge, but now it’s replaced with this hesitant nature. You can feel the sincerity in her words now, there’s no second-guessing her like before. You nod again. 

“I fear that you’ll never trust me again,” she slowly reaches across the table to thread her fingers through yours. You gulp, that’s the most touching you two have done since that night. “I understand why you don’t, but I fear that we’ll never reach a healthy place, one where we don’t need weekly sessions with Dr. Hanika.” 

“I...” Kuvira sighs, her shoulders slumping. “I fear I’ll never be what you need and that soon enough you’ll leave me because of it.” 

Your eyes widen at her words, on instinct you want to soothe her and tell her everything is going to be alright. You want to hold her like before and ease her fears like you used to do during her raging moments. You have to hold yourself back to keep from doing that. Lying to her won’t do either of you any good. 

She waits for you to reply, the clock ticks by as you struggle to find the words. As the second's tick by Kuvira feels panic swell inside of her. She doesn’t like being vulnerable or open, she’s gotten better at it but still hates the exposed feeling it comes with. 

Your mouth suddenly feels dry, you use your free hand to pick up your glass of water and take a sip. Her eyes follow your movements, and she has to look away when you place the glass back down, her mind wanting to focus on your lips. In the past, she could ease her fears with physical activities. She could pull you into a breathtaking kiss that did all the talking for her and feel ten times better afterward. 

“I understand your feelings,” you think of your sessions with Dr. Hanika. Of the exercises, she gave you months ago about how to healthily speak to your partner. “And I can’t make any promises because I don’t know what the future holds but… I know that it might seem small, but we’ve made progress.” 

You give her hand a gentle squeeze. “I couldn’t stand the idea of touching you again last summer, but we’ve worked through that, we’re talking again too. It’s slow but it’s progress and I think if we keep trying and accept her guidance we can reach a much better place than what we used to have.” 

She lets out a shaky breath, “You think so?” You nod, and you see some of that tension in her wash away. You know it’s your turn now and you’d rather go hide under the covers than talk about your fears. But Kuvira talked about hers and you know that took a lot of effort and courage on her part.

“I guess I’m afraid that once you're given your freedom back you won’t want me and all the effort that comes with loving me, and you’ll go back to him because I know the two of you were friends growing up.” 

Baatar was the only one out of Suyin’s kids to care for her. Huan was never mean, he just pretended she didn’t exist and, no matter how hard Kuvira tried to rein in her temper at times (which she never did a very good job at), Opal hated her guts. With the arrival of Wing and Wei Suyin’s time was spread thin, and suddenly she wasn’t able to give Kuvira the attention she needed anymore. 

So maybe she lashed out at the twins a lot growing up, and she knows now that she was wrong. But Kuvira craved love and attention despite not showing it, she desired it more than anything. It’s why she latched onto you after meeting, why she pressured you into following her around the earth kingdom. 

Baatar was her temporary fix until you came along, they weren’t very close, but they were friends. She knew he was infatuated with her and it always weirded her out quite a bit but that long-lived infatuation of his helped her in the long run. 

But it also cursed her in a way, she got what she wanted out of him but at the price of your happiness and trust. If she hadn’t used him you guys would be fine, you could kiss her for more than a few minutes and finally say those three words she craved. You haven’t said them in so long.

“And I’m afraid of being hurt again, I was always on edge and ready to cry back then. I know now that’s not healthy and I fear that if you revert to your old self, I’ll let you walk all over me again…” 

Spirits, your words sting, it’s like a stab at the heart, and Kuvira can’t help but flinch at them. To be honest, a part of her does fear that one day it’ll all be too much, and she’ll explode. That she’ll exhaust all of Dr. Hanika’s suggested coping mechanisms and bite back with enough malice to put the old her to shame. 

She’s trying to undo her whole life, to be honest, she’s been this aggressive, arrogant woman with a temper the size of Ba Sing Se since she was a little girl. Her father thought Suyin could get her to change and for a while, it seemed like her tendencies were subdued a bit once she joined the guard. 

But she could still snap, still blow up and put someone in their place just for breathing wrong on her bad days. On the train, with the stress of the Empire on her shoulders, Kuvira turned into the old her without even realizing it. She used to hold herself back, and she did a decent job at it but it’s not enough now. She needs to be better than ever, for you. 

“I, like you, can’t make any promises, but I am really trying Y/n.” 

“I know you are.” 

“I want this, I want us to be happy and I want you to one day know that I am not leaving you. I won’t even so much as touch another person because you’re all I want.” She pulls your hand up and slowly places a kiss on your knuckles. 

“I love you, and I know I hurt you but I want to make this right. When you were-” Kuvira’s eyes begin to water at the thought, “When you were bleeding out it put things into perspective for me. It showed me what’s really important and you are what’s important to me. Not power or immense control or adoration from my followers, just you.”

Tears well up in your gorgeous eyes, making them glisten like freshly polished glass. You gently pull your hand away from hers to wipe at them, you feel like you should say it back. But you're not ready to open your heart back up, it’s still healing from the damage dealt by none other than your lover.

“I can’t get it out of my head,” you whisper. Baatar’s cruel words he spat out in his jail cell still come back to haunt you at times and those images seem to have staked a claim in your mind for life. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust you around him, even if I begin to trust you the second he’s near it’ll all fall apart.” 

“Then I’ll steer clear of him, I can happily live in a Baatar free world.” 

“I shouldn’t have to make you cut someone out of your life,” your tone is laced with annoyance as you place your head in your hands. “You should be able to reconnect with the family that raised you without causing me to panic about my place in your life.” 

Kuvira realizes then that she never told you about talking to Baatar during her temporary leave. She didn’t mean to not tell you, it just never came up. Honestly, you didn’t ask any questions about it, you were just happy she was home safe. 

“I should tell you,” Kuvira begins, her heart racing, “that when I was helping Korra I had to work with Baatar.”  

Your eyes widen at her words, head still in your hands your whole body freezes as you try to process her words. You try to think back to anytime she might have mentioned that trip and then you remember finding out about her being in Zaofu a few days before her return. She never came back for those few days, never sent someone to check in on you. 

“Nothing happened.” You still don’t respond to her words, verbally or physically. “I needed his help to create a device for Korra… Y/n?” 

“Did you know she fucked me? Multiple times.”

“Did you know she moaned my name as I drove into her?” 

She reaches forward to touch your arm, to try to bring you back down to earth. You yank away from her, your head shooting up to look at her with a look of pure outrage. Your walls are beginning to slam back into place and everything Dr. Hanika told you begins to burn away. 

You push your chair back, making a beeline for the bedroom. You hear the skidding of a chair behind you before Kuvira grabs your forearm. Her grip isn’t bruising but you know no matter how hard you try you won’t be able to rip her handoff. 

“Don’t shut me out.” Her voice drips with desperation as she gently tugs you to face her. “You can’t keep shutting me out like this.” 

“Why not?! You did it to me for three years!” 

“Yeah, and we’re in therapy because of it!” 

“You know how I feel about him, you know it and you still saw him? You kept all this from me for what? Because the only reason I can think of is you fucking him again!”

“I didn’t sleep with him,” she looks so hurt, but you can’t help all of your insecurities that just keep intensifying. “We had to work on a project together to help Asami. I apologized to him and told him I love you, please Y/n.” 

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” Your brain convinces you she’s lying, she has to be. But she never lied in the past about sleeping with him, she was way too open about it. But now is different, now you’ll leave. 

“It honestly slipped my mind. I was just happy that you were talking to me again. We never talked about that trip and suddenly you were touching me again and I-I could only think about making you happy.” 

“I’ve loved her since I was thirteen years old.” 

“He wouldn’t just let you go, I can’t believe that he just backed down and accepted that you weren’t his anymore.” He would kill for her, you're pretty sure he did. Baatar was many things, and stubborn was definitely one of them. 

“I won’t lie and tell you he didn’t try something but I shot him down and made sure he knew we were strictly working together.” Her hands slide up to cradle your face, you debate pushing her away and locking yourself in the darkness of your room to brood. It seems so appealing. 

“I learned my lesson Y/n, I know I fucked up big time and I just want to make it right. You have to believe me.” She pulls you closer until your foreheads are touching and sighs, “we can’t keep going in circles.” 

You know you can’t, sooner or later you’ll have to either fully put in the effort to learn to trust her or finally leave. Both ideas terrify you, you don’t want to lose her but you also don’t want to open back up. Being with her all those years felt like having your heart chained up, anytime you tried to be, well you, the chains tightened, and that suffocating feeling became more intense. 

Her thumbs gently brush over your cheekbones as she patiently waits for a reply. You don’t know what to do or what to believe, the gnarled, rotten part within you screams at you that she’s lying. But the part of you that’s hopeful, that still loves Kuvira and wants a future, begs you to believe her. It’s a waging war within and you don’t know which side you want to win. 

“Do you still love me?” You’ve taken too long to reply. Kuvira’s worries are beginning to intensify. She knows she should wait and give you time, but she can’t keep doing this whilst in the dark about your feelings. She, if anything, loves you more than ever. 

Kuvira had never seen this domestic side of you, the gentle care you pour into your plants and Lily makes her dream of a future child with you. You hum when reading which she doesn’t think you know, and she won’t tell you because she loves it. Without the fear of being caught, she can hold you until mid-morning when you finally wake up. She gets to watch you peacefully sleep for a while, hear you murmur an unintelligible word or two as you snuggle up close. 

On the train Kuvira held herself back to an extent, she forced herself to focus on uniting the Earth Empire which meant putting you on the back burner more often than not. But now all that’s left is you and fuck does she love it. 

“I…” You begin, the words are stuck in your throat, they feel sharp and painful. You know what to say, you know you need to tell her the truth. If you shy away now you won’t be the one walking out that door, it’ll be her. “Yes.” 

You settle on that, yes is easier to swallow. Those three words seem monumental and you aren’t there yet. You do still love her, but to say it out loud makes you vulnerable, it means taking off the metal armor you’ve bent around your heart.

Kuvira tries not to show her disappointment at your response, she knows she should be happy with what she’s been given. But it’s almost been a year and part of her is becoming desperate. She took your love for granted back then. You used to tell her every night before you drifted off to sleep how much you loved her. She sucks it up and accepts what little you can offer. 

“Then don’t shut me out again.” 

“Okay.” 

      4. Have a calm conversation where you ask each other questions. 

Three weeks later and now you can make it to 33 seconds. Despite feeling a bit better due to it, you know not to push the boundaries like last time and continue to keep sex off the table. You continue to compliment one another and Kuvira starts to regularly say ‘I love you,’ again. You always just smile as a reply and nod. It hurts but she’ll take it. 

It still takes a while to work back up to before, she knows to hold herself back as you hesitantly brush your fingers against hers or hug her for only a few seconds. At the end of week two, it gets a bit easier for you. During your last couples session, you both talked more in-depth about your mistake. You owned up to being the instigator and the cause of it, just wanting to feel normal again. 

Dr. Hanika has you begin journaling your thoughts and feelings to help keep you check but also to make sure nothing bottles up. It’s almost embarrassing when she gently reminds you of the work you’d both put in to not shut yourself out again, but she doesn’t scold you or anything, simply tells you it’s okay to mess up but to keep trying. 

You both casually compliment one another throughout the day and at night you’ve gone back to snuggling up close whilst still awake. It’s in the evening as the both of you are laying down for the night the silence calming as she pulls you closer. 

“Are you sleepy?” You ask, Kuvira shakes her head as she places a soft kiss at the top of yours. Your insides flutter at her actions and sigh, “I’m not either.” 

Before, if neither of you were tired you’d claw away each other's clothes and devour each other until the point of exhaustion. But that was before and this is now, so a new solution, one that involves keeping your clothes on needs to be created. 

“We could… Talk?” 

“What about?” you look up, your noses almost touching as you raise a brow. Kuvira has to use every ounce of self-restraint she has to keep from kissing you. It’d be easy, you're close.

“Well we could ask each other stuff, there’s bound to be a lot of things we still don’t know about one another.” You smile at Kuvira’s words and nod. You guys talked back on the train and got to know each other but for the most part, your relationship was physical. There was a lot she probably didn’t know. 

You twist your body around so your chin is resting on her chest so you can easily look at her, one of your legs tangles with hers. You decide to be brave and gently reach a hand up to run your fingers through her hair. Kuvira’s eyes squeeze shut at the action as she leans into your hand, this level of affection from you makes her want to cry. Just a few months ago you couldn’t even look into her eyes. 

You twirl a strand around your finger before asking “what did you wanna be when you were little?” 

“Like career-wise?” You hum in response and Kuvira sighs as she tries to think of it. She tried to push anything before sixteen out of her mind most of the time. “It’s embarrassing.” 

“C’mon! I wanna know,” you grin at the slight flush to her face. She’s never embarrassed, always so sure of herself and her actions. “Please, for me?” 

She hates that you know that’ll work. You’ve got her wrapped around your finger, and she’s not even sure if you're all too aware of how far she’d go for you. 

“I wanted to be a pro bender…” You lean up a bit at her words, your face softening. 

“You still could, you're the best earth bender I’ve ever seen.” Kuvira rolls her eyes at your words, to be a pro bender involves being likable. No one would want her on their team or cheer for her. “Kuvira, once our house arrest is over we can start over and do whatever we wanna do.” 

“What do you want to do, once yours is up?” You know she’s deflecting but decide to drop it, for now. 

“I wanna take dance lessons again if Suyin will let me.” 

“I worked everything out with her. Besides, you broke her family out, so I don’t see why she’d have a grudge against you,” she hesitantly lifts one of her hands and softly trails her fingertips up your arm. You let out a soft sigh as she brings it up to cup your cheek. “You were a great dancer back then.” 

You chuckle at her words, not believing any bit of it. “I was not, I kept messing up and falling over.” Especially during your private practices with Kuvira, focusing on anything that wasn’t her proved to be impossible. 

You’d always zone out as you watched her braid swish back and forth with her movements. More than once did she have to guide you through the motions with her hands on your hips. You definitely couldn’t focus then. 

“For a newbie, you did amazing, much better than I did my first few months.” You know she’s just being nice. Kuvira spent most of her younger teenage years training to one day be a guard and such a job requires coordination, so she must have been amazing at dancing from the beginning. You can’t imagine her being bad. 

“You humor me too much,” you say, your tone light and happy. Right now all the bad moments are at the very back of your mind as you lay in this rare state with Kuvira. 

“I’m not lying!” 

“You are! I vividly remember stepping on your toes at least twice.” 

“Well I said for a newbie you did amazing not that you perfected it the second you walked into the room.” You both quietly laugh at that, at some point you stopped twirling her hair but instead just gently held the piece between your two fingers. As your laughter settles down, Kuvira gently rubs her thumb across your cheekbone and asks “What did you wanna be? When you were little.” 

“Oh, just like my mom,” you bite your lip to try and stop from grinning.  

“Really?” 

“Yea, I used to wear her helmet around the house all the time and got so excited when I found out I was an earth bender. But then I got older and realized all the job entailed.” Kuvira tries to picture a mini you racing down the halls of your home with an oversized metal helmet on, it most likely bounced on your shoulders as you ran. She determines she likes that image quite a lot. “I was never cut out for fighting, I definitely inherited my dad's pacifist nature.”

“Do your parents have any pictures of you growing up?” Kuvira knows they do, she remembers the one hung up in the hallway and how there were a dozen others just like it. 

“Yeah, my dad never seemed to put down the camera. Especially after my mom made Lieutenant because she wasn’t home as often, so he tried to take extra photos for her.” 

Kuvira’s hand that was once on your cheek travels down to your waist where it finds a home. You lean your cheek against her chest, never breaking eye contact. “Is there… any photos of you when you were younger?” 

She won’t have anything before Zaofu. Her parents left her with a sack of clothes and a few toys before ditching her to have a stress-free life. But Suyin must have a few photos of her tucked away somewhere. 

“I don’t know. I wouldn’t be surprised if Suyin destroyed them after I left.” You find that hard to believe. You might not be a massive fan of her after she tried to assassinate Kuvira but a part of you knows she’s kept at least one.

“Well… I guess we’ll just have to take a bunch of new ones. Y’know I think my dad has some photos of us from Winter Solstice.” Tiredness slowly creeps into your features, instead of bidding her goodnight you continue. “Are you really happy, Kuvira?” 

Last year it seemed the only way for her to be truly happy was to conquer the Earth Kingdom. Nothing satisfied her for long but the power she possessed always left this triumphant glint in her eyes. Now she cooks meals for the both of you and quietly draws during the day. Sometimes the both of you dance after dinner and others you simply cuddle on the couch with Lily laying at your feet. It’s nothing like her old life. 

The hand resting on your hip slides up to cup your other cheek, your face is gently cradled between her hands. She doesn’t know how to properly word how happy she is. Kuvira used to think to be happy she had to be at the top. 

Control was a necessary element in her life and for the longest time, she thought she’d simply perish without it. But circumstances change, events mold people into something new, and she knows if the old her saw her now she’d laugh. Old, arrogant Kuvira would think this all a lie and carry on with her life, that chip embedded on her shoulder. 

She wonders what would have happened if she had gone after Republic City. Would she have won? Would you have found it in yourself to stomach the sight of her? She knows the answer to the last question, remembering the face you made the day she told you of the final act in her plan. 

But now she can simply breathe with you and lay with you. There’s no pressure to be anything but herself, no need to appear strong at every given moment. There are things she misses about the outside world, but your company helps her forget about them all. 

“I think, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been,” is all she manages to say. But it’s enough for you judging by the loving grin you give in return. 

[hogwartswelcomesyou]

The Mods Discuss: Severus Snape

Tory: Okay, so first off, I would start with this contention – Snape is a prick, but he’s done some noble things. And more importantly, those traits do not have to be mutually exclusive. 

Star: To me, you can like a character, and still loathe them as a person. Snape in the real world would make me really angry, and he is completely evil, but as a character, he is incredibly well written, super complex and very flawed, but also has a lot of strengths. He’s done some very awful things, but he has also done some good. To me though, the bad outweighs the good.

Tory: Me personally, I wouldn’t say he’s evil – just completely and totally selfish. He has a very narrow and shallow world-view, and that means that he has an underdeveloped sense of empathy for others. I’ve known people like that, and they can definitely be frustrating. I guess it comes down to the question: is a good action done for a bad reason still good?

Star: bullying loads of students and exposing Lupin as a lycanthrope isn’t evil to you? Lupin was never able to find a job after that, and his assigning the paper on werewolves meant Lupin had to read essays from his students describing how to kill him, and he was likely overrun with panic of a student working it out. He also told Voldemort he didn’t care about Harry or James, so long as Lily lived, which is giving Voldy PERMISSION to kill a toddler, who has done nothing to him. As awful as it is, I can kind of understand his willingness to give up James, seeing James was awful to him at least the one time, but LETTING SOMEONE MURDER A BABY? And to answer you Tory, I don’t think so. If there is 0 other option and you absolutely must do something bad to achieve a good end, it’s not as bad, but if you do it out of laziness or inability to think ahead, then no.

Tory: Well, admittedly, the only one who actually finished the werewolf essay was Hermione, but that’s beside the point. I guess for me I personally have difficulty labeling someone as “evil” unless they are beyond redemption or any shred of goodness. Voldemort is evil. Bellatrix is evil. Umbridge is evil. Snape is a piss-poor excuse of a human being, capable of great cruelty and spite, but he also had the ability to love and was capable of great courage and selflessness. I guess for me I just see “evil” as an all-black term, with no potential for moral grayness – and Snape I do see as a gray character. 

Star: okay, so he’s not quite on the level of Umbridge or Voldy, but I still think he’s a gutless person. The fact that Neville is more scared of Snape than Bellatrix (the woman who tortured his parents into insanity!!), says a lot to me. And when it comes to Snape and Lily, i think for him it was more obsession and idolization of a person, I really don’t think it was love. And even if only ONE student completed the essay, he still had to read his best student who could have worked it out and turned him in, explaining how best to kill him, which would scare me silly. 

Tori: I’m also not comfortable labeling someone as evil, but for different reasons. ‘Evil’ is a subjective term that people can manipulate to fit their desires. In everyone’s eyes, the other person is evil. I do understand that there are characters, such as Voldemort, who are written to be the embodiment of evil. However, there were also circumstances that were beyond his control in the first place. (Ex: he had no capability to love.) To me, Snape is not an evil character. He certainly is not good, as we see him time and time again be emotionally abusive to students. I also agree with Star, I don’t think he actually loved Lily, but rather was infatuated with her. Love is an active choice, and Snape actively turned his back on Lily, the people she cared for, and the things that mattered to her. It was only until he realized that his choices were going to lead to her death that he felt remorse. Snape is not a good guy; he’s a jerk with some childish grudges that he needs to learn to let go. He’s also not completely bad either; he’s able to see the error of his ways. I think we as a fandom should stop trying to paint him as absolutely heroic or demonic, and just let him be the multi-faceted complex character that he was. He was man who made very bad decisions, and attempted to atone for them. 

Jinxy: I agree with Tori and Tory. I think that Snape definitely is a morally gray character who truly isn’t evil, but isn’t really good either. He does some awful things, he does some not-so-awful things. He recognizes that he did some bad things, but he was also the person who decided to make those decisions in the first place. He was very cruel to Harry for most of the series, and he’s driven heavily by his feud with James and feelings(?) for Lily. He does some seriously not okay stuff, but we do slowly see him try to correct his wrongdoings. I don’t like Snape as a person, he truly is cruel and mean, no matter what he does to try and fix it. But, as a character, he is one of the most intriguing, complex, characters that I have seen, which is something that I think that the fandom needs to recognize more. Someone can be a terrible person, and still be an interesting, complex character!

MoMo: Snape will always drive me insane. I was never a huge fan of him. He was rude and let his emotions control him and that’s not something I can find myself admiring. However, I’ve seen many arguments supporting his actions due to his past, and not just based upon his desire for Lily; he was abused, and everyone copes with abuse differently. On top of that, he’s sometimes interpreted as a creep, because of how he felt for Lily, but is it really so unreasonable? When she said she didn’t have romantic feelings for him and asked for him to back off, that’s exactly what he did. All he wanted was a friend, and that’s exactly what he never got. I’d be bitter too.

Boudica: Snape…..I definitely have no love for the man. While I support the efforts that where made for the Order where great. Overwhelming it’s a hard no. Everyone who’s ever been abused has a choice to make. How will I move on from my own trauma? Will I break the cycle or continue it? At nearly every point where he could have he didn’t. Color me not impressed.

Tori: I think we’ve come to an agreement that Snape definitely isn’t a good guy. I suppose it boils down to your interpretation of evil. 

Tory: I think that’s fair. To change gears slightly, I actually find the debate about whether or not Snape loved Lily quite compelling. I personally am in the middle – he definitely did not always put Lily’s feelings first, but he did still put a lot on the line solely out of devotion to her and her cause. Coming from someone who has people in my family who love me despite also consistently being self-centered and completely ignorant about my wishes, I could believe that someone can love another person while also not fully understanding everything love entails. And I could also believe that one’s definition of love can change. As an example, Darth Vader tries at first to coax Luke to the Dark Side so they can “rule the galaxy together as father and son” – I would argue in Vader’s self-focused, Dark-Side-corrupted head, he is showing love for his son, because he wants them on the same side, rather than as enemies. Later, however, he learns the true meaning of love when he sacrifices himself to save Luke. Even my own father has tried to pressure me into certain career paths out of misguided love. So I do feel like love can be expressed badly or not always fully understood.

Squish: Hm…Honestly I think everyone has these stages when it comes to Harry Potter (about Snape). The first stage would be hating him because you’ve only read some of the books and you may think he’s evil. The second, would be thinking he’s the hero of the whole thing, which may be true in some way (barely but okay). Finally, realizing that even though he did some good towards the end, he was a total creep who never got over his childhood crush. He even went so far to abuse her son because he reminded Snape of the man she truly loved. I’m sorry if I’m being harsh, but I really don’t like Snape as a character. It’s been brought to my attention of what it might’ve been like if Harry was a female, maybe looking more like Lily. I’m not saying that he would’ve gone as far as what you may be thinking now, but like… imagine. Me personally, think Snape is very messed up as a whole. He even only really helped when he was dying, by the way.

Tori: I think you can definitely care about someone without loving them. Love is not a feeling, it’s a choice, and I think one thing JK Rowling definitely did was challenge the notion of love, and make us analyze whether or not the relationships in Harry Potter were OK. Yes, I think Snape cared about Lily, but he didn’t love her because he never respected her. Respect is the key of any relationship. If you don’t have it, it’s not healthy. 

Jinxy: Maybe it wasn’t love but more of a lust? Desire? Obsession? Long after she dies, he still brings her up. He never really moves on from her, and I think that that’s really unhealthy, both for him and his mental health and for their relationship. I’ll wrap this up by pointing towards that one famous quote: “If you love something, let it go […]” Snape really doesn't do that, does he?

What are your thoughts on Snape? Tell us below! And feel free to let us know if there are other things in the HP universe that you would like to see us discuss!