#zoom in…just trust me
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my-blooming-darling · 2 years ago
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if this song was a person
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shalom-iamcominghome · 4 months ago
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I've been doing a lot of reflection as of late, especially after this past class.
This past class was about the Torah and Tanakh in general, and the way the rabbi talked about the commandments (specifically the ten commandments) has made me really reflect on how I interpret them, specifically the fifth commandment, or honoring your mother and father.
This is a commandment I have wrestled with for a long time - in fact, it brought me away from g-d at multiple times. I was severely abused when I was incredibly young by my mother, and I used to feel insulted at the implication that I were to honor her while she got to live a better life. It was hypocritical, in my eyes.
But this rabbi surmised that this particular commandment was because parenthood is an act of creation, something that is like the g-d from which we come from. My realization is this: I don't think we're necessarily meant to take even these commandments literally.
I this particular commandment is more of a call to honor creation - creation is a gift, and like any gift, many people simply will not like it and will discard it. The person who abused me created me, but she did not honor creation. She didn't honor me, but I can still honor it.
I have started to honor creation much more. I'm too young, too unstable, not mature enough to be a father (though I fantasize about it), but I create all the time. I create relationships, I create with my hands through crochet. I create memories, I create my world. And I can honor who I am and where I came from that made me who I am. I've been learning one of the mother tongues of my family (Italian, since part of my family originates there) and it was judaism that inspired me to do this.
I don't think g-d wants me to honor my abuser. I think He wants me to remember the Holy action of creation. When I am a father, that act of creation will be Holy, and indeed, I am already joyful about the thought.
I have seen many people struggle with this particular commandment, but I think this perspective helps me personally. I don't think I ever have to forgive my abusers (plural), and I don't think I am commanded to simply because they happened to be family. I am commanded to recognize the holy, to elevate the mundane. In doing so, I will remember g-d. Through creation, I honor g-d and everything he has done for us, for me, and for our collective people.
#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#abuse tw#i am not sharing this for the sake of pity and i also ask not to be told to divulge my abuse story. that isn't relevant#i have been needing to engage with this topic for a long time though and judaism has helped me a bit in navigating healing#but i decided to share this publicly in the hopes it will help other survivors specifically of familial/parental abuse#i know how it feels (in general). it's so lonely and you can really harbor (understandable) baggage about this particular commandment#i have a meeting with My Rabbi (sponsoring rabbi) and i might bring this up. we've only spoken once face-to-face (zoom)#so that might be really Intense to bring up to him but he is very kind and i trust him (which is why he is My Rabbi)#and he has already told me that he WANTS me to wrestle with g-d and His word *with* him#again i am posting this publicly so i can document my thoughts and keep them straight but also with the hope it MIGHT help others#if it even *casually* inspires another survivor i will feel so grateful (though it is THEIR achievement and not mine to claim)#i want us to survive. i want us to eat well. i want us to smile#i will say that this must be a very sudden whiplash in tone from my last post about sex. from sex to awful horrific abuse#my stream of consciousness is just Like This though in the sense that i have very sudden realizations and tonal whiplashes#so you're just getting a very frank look into how my brain is structured and what my brain thinks are important enough to think about#if i seem much more verbose it's because i needed to write this on my laptop which makes typing and more importantly yapping even *easier*
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coldflash-corner · 13 days ago
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Speaking of Barry being able to read Leonard Snart scarily well, imagine that Barry notices how Snart reacts to people Barry knows, and files that away in his opinions of that person
Barry is in the cortex with someone he finds kind of annoying but harmless, Snart walks in for Definitely-Not-Flirting-While-Doing-Business Reasons, and starts lowkey acting like this guy is an Immediate Threat that he's trying to act cool around to not set him off. And Barry immediately knocks like 5 points off of the "how much do i trust this guy" ranking. Subtly starts telling him less things, looks into what he's doing on the downlow, treats him as potentially suspicious And turns out... The guy does have bad intentions
Leonard comes in and meets some of Barry's new friends/coworkers, and clearly seems to mark one of them as more trustworthy/less of a threat than everyone else. And when Barry needs help or someone to confide in, he goes to that person over everyone else
Barry comes in to Saints and Sinners and sees a regular he's run into before, but hasn't seen interact with Snart. He thought the guy might be pretty cool. But today he walks into them talking, and Immediately sees that Snart is closed off, jumpy, does NOT like that guy in his space. And Barry immediately takes cues off of that, turns the guy down when he later asks to have drinks together next time Barry drops by Saints
If Snart seems unnerved by someone Barry knows, Barry trusts his instincts. Even if Leonard never says anything to Barry out loud, he still takes note of that. If Snart likes someone, or just thinks they're reliable, Barry will trust that instinct.
Even if Snart doesn't say his feelings out loud, Barry trusts him so innately that he will listen to Snart's instincts when it's clear he's feeling a type of way
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yarrowdraws · 1 year ago
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inspired by @ spilledkaleidoscope's disco sapphics portraits
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skrunksthatwunk · 1 year ago
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landing
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mushroominaforest · 4 months ago
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Can I get some Human anatomy tips ? I'd Google it but I like hearing from fellow cartoony artists. If you have no tips or anything u can just ignore me :)
All you gotta do to achieve good humans with accurate anatomy in your art is to only draw Canadians in the winter
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Jokes aside, honestly just practice. There’s no quick and easy trick to do good anatomy, you have to put in the time. Study references, do billions of figure drawings, look at skeletons, bone structures, muscle and fat formations etc.
Dont just practice drawing people standing in the pick your character/sims stance. Draw ‘em walking, playing an instrument, playing a sport, (yoga is a good one for more complex pose practice).
Bear in mind this is coming from an art major, so I probably have snobbish opinions about the « right » way to draw lmao.
And if all else fails, just draw Canadians in winter.
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banditblvd · 6 months ago
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notebookcast.com was an experience and a half
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einsatzzz · 4 months ago
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If Chrome tells me to jump off a cliff, I will simply just jump off a cliff no questions asked
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lordzuuko · 1 year ago
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I'm not ashamed to admit I took Carlo out just so I can see him walk and jog in those pants while his bag and Gemini jiggles. (¬////¬)
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vengeful4ever · 1 year ago
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okay hear me out, this may be a bit more tin hatish than I normally go but.
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I think this Nathan guy faked this screenshot. when I got a closer look at them the font seems too small and when you send links on instagram it normally has like a picture of whatever it is, for this it would be the cover image of the article, but this doesn't have that. on top of that, theres also the fact that they dont follow each other, instagram makes you invite someone to chat if you dont follow each other, so thats suspicious in my opinion. also, wouldn't you think if worm was trolling, he would just say it? This just doesn't make sense to me at all
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tacagen · 1 year ago
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WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT HOW THIS SUCKER NOT ONLY GOT A NEW DESIGN BUT FUCKING DIED AGAIN EXACTLY 3 PAGES LATERRR
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homosekularnost · 1 year ago
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the murderbot au in which political convictions are only ever expressed through novelty mugs continues
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valentinedagger · 10 months ago
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i have determined that bimonthly updates are a good pace for me to build up a backlog of chapter drafts, but a horrible pace for audiences remembering the serial exists.
at this point, just trying to get the entire thing drafted as quickly as possible so that i can switch to weekly updates (edits take significantly less time than drafting) and crossing my fingers hoping that there'll be a bit more interest in the beta discord in the next few months. obviously, weekly updates still aren't possible if i can't get any beta feedback at that pace, but... look, book 2 is slated to be about 40-45 chapters, and i do not think anyone wants it to be stretched out over 80+ weeks. holy fuck.
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kaninchen-reblogs · 8 months ago
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“D&D races tier list” “What your favorite FFXIV race says about you” “ranking every fantasy race” stop it stop it stop it stop it STOP IT STOP IT
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starrypawz · 10 months ago
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Had the experience of hearing my eldest brother basically talking shit about me and going down his 'i'm implying my sibling is an idiot' routine yet again
🙃
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thechronicmasochist · 2 years ago
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I had a category ten autistic moment over a week ago and I'm still not recovered from it 🙄 social anxiety is annoying i just want to embrace my inner freak and move on
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