#you're essentially making up for the thing you didn't do while also making yourself more comfortable. this is a net win
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welcometogrouchland · 1 year ago
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Not going to an event because you suddenly got scared vs not going to an event bc you talked to someone and they were like "yeah it's fun but kinda boring and I'm not going this year and neither is anyone else we know" (I'm in hell I'm in hell I'm in hell)
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celiababy · 7 days ago
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Ain't Right
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Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: You have a major (borderline obsessive) crush on Joel, and you're on a mission to fuck him.
Warnings: 18+ SMUT MDNI, age gap (56/20), swearing, fingering (fem!receiving), p in v, unprotected sex, size kink, cum eating, name calling, kinda mean Joel, alcohol, vomiting, an extremely brief mention of suicide
Disclaimer: I lowkey don't know the logistics of the show so if some things are wrong please look over it I'm just trying to write smut about Joel Miller godbless.
Ain't Right part 2
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Ever since that tortured old man showed up in Jackson, your life hasn't been the same.
Tommy's older brother, and your absolute undoing.
When Joel Miller rode into town, it was like everything suddenly made sense. The skies got clearer, the air smelled better, and the birds even chirped their love songs louder.
Everything about him drew you in; his cold demeanor, stoic face, tired eyes—but gentle around those he cared about, which was only a few select people.
And you certainly were not one of those select people.
Joel didn't know what to think about you.
To him, you were odd. Yes, you were undoubtedly the most beautiful girl in Jackson, but he felt distance between the two of you was essential.
He felt this way because he knew.
Joel wasn't oblivious to your stares; he might've been an old man, but he remembered the laws of attraction fairly well.
He didn't like the thought of you liking him.
You were young, attractive, and had plenty of age-appropriate prospects just begging for your attention. Every boy in Jackson wanted a piece of you—but you only had eyes for Joel.
He was getting old and tired, ain't no reason why you should be so fond over him.
He also didn't like that you made your attraction so obvious. It made people whisper, and Joel about had enough teasing from Tommy.
"You gonna let that young thing jump your bones or what, Joel?" Is an example of the few things his brother would chirp at him whenever you were around and had eyes on him like he was a target.
So, all things considered, it's no surprise when Joel is reluctant to make a supply run with you.
You had begged Tommy to let you go out and finally start pulling your weight, carefully adding that Joel would be a great teacher for a first timer like yourself.
You stand near the truck, squeezing the straps of your backpack while watching Joel and Tommy whisper to themselves a couple feet away.
"You can't find anyone else?" Joel growls lowly, narrowing his eyes at his insufferable brother who he’d really like to strangle right now.
"Are you seriously scared of a twenty year old girl, Joel?" Tommy asked exasperatedly, throwing his arm out in disbelief. "It'll take two hours tops, what the hell are you so scared of?" Joel is exhaling through his nose, dragging a hand down his jaw in complete disgruntlement.
"You know what the hell I'm scared of Tommy—goddammit," He gets in his brother’s face before realizing you’re still watching them.
He takes a moment to back up and calm down, breathing out through his nose.
"I do not need this town thinkin' I am encouraging this girls...feelin's." He murmurs lowly.
Tommy rolls his eyes before shoving Joel's backpack into his chest.
"Just don't fuck her, Joel. How hard could it be?"
Joel watches as Tommy turns his back and walks away, leaving just you and him.
Joel had spent a lot of time making sure he was never in a situation alone with you—now he was about to be your unsupervised mentor.
He feels a groan try and crawl its way out his throat, but he pushes it down.
He starts walking to the truck, not even looking at you as he passes and yanks the driver side door open with more force than necessary.
"Let's make this quick." He grunts out, climbing inside.
You do the same, only with a little bit more enthusiasm. ***
The trip is a complete bust.
Joel barely paid you any attention, no matter how many flirty gestures you made at him.
You'd say something remotely suggestive and he'd either glare at you, or just flat out ignore you.
But you were relentless. Giving up on him wasn't in the cards for you, no matter how many judgmental looks he casted your way.
You guys had been driving back to town for around five minutes; Joel has kept his eyes firmly on the road in fear of you sparking a conversation with him.
But you do anyways.
You turn your body to face him in the bench seat, your eyes cascading down his breath-taking side profile.
You zoned in on the gray patches of his beard, and how his face had the remnants of a long, unforgiving life weaved into his wrinkles and scars.
You're momentarily rendered speechless by his looks before he side-eyes you.
"What?" He huffs out, not being able to handle your intense stare any longer.
"Why not?"
A beat.
"What?" He asks again, his brows furrowing together, an annoyed and confused expression painting his features.
"Why won't you fuck me?"
Joel physically winces at your language, scoffing in what looks to be disgust as he starts shaking his head.
"We're not starting this." He snaps firmly, a tone in his voice that you haven't heard before.
Completely disregarding his words, you start.
"Is it because I'm not pretty enough?" Joel groans out, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Is it because there's someone else?" He's close to snapping. "Is it because you can't get it up? I heard thats a problem with guys your age-"
Joel slams on the brakes, sending you lurching forward. He shoves the truck into park before turning to face you, a scary look on his face.
"I am not going to fuck you--Christ almighty," Joel raises his voice at you.
You're staring at him, wide eyes and lips parted in surprise. You weren't really expecting this.
"you're bustin' my fuckin' balls, Look kid," He starts up again, this time with a softer tone. "M'about 40 years too old for you-"
You cut him off with a murmur. "36, I did the math."
"Same damn thing," he snaps, shaking his head. "Point is—you don't needa be wastin' your time with me; there are plenty boys your age that will satisfy your...you."
You scoff in his face but try to disguise it by clearing your throat.
"I'm not asking you to marry me, Joel," You start, a sad smile spreading across your lips. "S'just sex." You say with a shrug, blush coating your cheeks because now your mind is imagining sex with him.
He stays silent and looks away from you, closing his eyes like he couldn’t believe this was happening.
That urges you to say more.
"I won't tell anyone," You're practically whispering, looking down at your fidgeting hands in your lap. "I'd let you do anything you wanted to me."
Joel's heart cinches in his chest at your words, mostly because he can tell you're being so genuine.
Why the hell did you like him so much? He just couldn’t understand it.
But he can't entertain this any longer because he knows if he did, he'd give into you.
"I don't wanna hear another goddamn word outta your mouth." Joel says in a strikingly even and calm tone, putting the truck into drive and continuing back.
He's eerily silent, and so is the rest of the trip because you're too dejected to speak.
Eventually, you both arrive home and you're fast to get out of the truck.
You slam the door and keep your head down as you walk away, snow crunching beneath your boots.
Joel takes his time, watching you storm off with tired eyes.
He feels bad for being so rough on you, but he figured it was the only way to get you to stop liking him.
Tommy walks up, a concerned look on his face as he looks back between you and Joel.
"Guessin' you didn't fuck her."
***
Nobody had seen you in days.
The pain of rejection had you in a mental place that you had never experienced before.
No one has ever denied you—ever.
The situation was 100x worse considering you actually liked Joel, and he wasn't just another toy to play with.
Joel figured his life would get easier with you not around, and it kinda did in some aspects.
But he couldn't stop the gnawing feeling of guilt slowly eating at him like a parasite.
He'd been cruel to you in the way he went about things, and he felt bad.
Had he really broken your heart? He didn't know you liked him that much.
He sits in his living room, contemplating how to go about this entirely fucked up situation.
He debates making amends with you, apologizing and rejecting you again but in a gentler way.
He deliberates on his plan of action while nursing a glass of whiskey before he's interrupted by three bangs on his front door, followed by a screeching: "JOEL"
He mutters a 'what the fuck' under his breath, walking to the door and picking his 9mil up on the way.
His eyes widen when he sees you-standing there in all your glory.
It's the middle of winter and snowing like hell, yet you're wearing shorts and a tank top with a beer bottle in your hand.
"Jesus, kid-what the fuck," Joel ushers you inside quickly, taking his big jacket off the coatrack and draping it over you.
He also tosses his gun to the side, obviously you were no threat.
"You tryin' to get frostbit? Christ," he's swearing and muttering profanities as he guides you over to the couch, now basically swaddling you in blankets.
You've never been inside his house before, only ever walked passed it a few times. It smells like him.
You, however, smell like alcohol and bad decisions.
Joel picked up on how drunk you were the minute you stumbled through the door. He takes the bottle from your hand and sets it aside somewhere, glaring at you like how a mad parent would.
"The hell are you doin' out in the snow like that? Fuckin' death wish or somethin'?"
His words are kinda fuzzy in your ears, you're so drunk that you barely even register them.
An unprompted giggle spills from your lips as you shake your head at him.
"It's not snowing silly," You chide, making him out to be an idiot when, in actuality, it's a damn blizzard outside.
He knows from that statement alone that you are way off your rocker tonight.
"How much have ya had to drink, kid?" Joel asks, raking a hand through his graying hair.
"Don't call me kid," You snap, a quick flash of anger in your expression. "M'not a kid."
Joel rolls his eyes so hard that he probably caused a tsunami on the other side of the world.
“Yeah yeah, whatever. What are you doin’ here?” He asks exasperatedly, dragging a hand down his jaw while looking at your trembling figure.
There’s a long pause before you answer. You just got distracted by his big brown eyes.
“Jus’ wanted to say hi.” You murmur, unable to tear your gaze away from his face.
“Say hi?” He reiterates, looking at you like you’ve actually lost your mind.
You probably have.
After a moment, Joel can’t help but chuckle in disbelief, letting his body lean back against the couch.
The absurdity of it all turned humorous to him.
Here you are, sitting in his living room, practically nude with only his coat and blankets protecting your modesty, having just trekked through the snow all for what? To say hey?
You’re still sitting there, motionless and trying to remember how to breathe because his laughing face has your heart lighting off fireworks.
“Fuckin’ hell—hi.” Is all he says, turning his head to the side to look at you as he crosses his arms over his chest.
You smile like a dope at him, so extremely happy to be there in his company.
But the alcohol in your system is fighting you, and you’re finding it hard to keep your eyes open.
“S’it cool if I say the nigh?” You slur, falling vertically on the couch, your head crashing onto Joel’s thigh.
You nuzzle your cheek against the fabric of his jeans and Joel is just about to gently push you off, but he stops himself.
You look so comfortable and so at peace that Joel can’t do anything except stare at you.
Your cheek is slightly smushed, your lips are parted, your eyes are shut and don’t plan on opening—it’s insane to him how at home you looked.
Like you belonged here, head rested on his lap.
Fuck.
He was fucked this time.
He doesn’t move you. Instead, he fixes the blankets on top of you so you’re fully covered, and sits there with you the entire night.
He’s really gone soft.
***
When morning comes, you’re first to wake up, accompanied by a splitting headache.
You don’t even notice how Joel’s hand had fallen onto your waist some time during the night because you’re too busy making a b-line for the bathroom.
You chuck your guts up into the toliet, clutching the porcelain and groaning out in pain.
Joel wakes up to the sound of your hurling, momentarily disoriented before he remembers last nights events.
He’s quick to come to your aid in the bathroom, wasting no time gathering your hair in his fist to get it out of your face.
"S'right, get it all out," He murmurs out encouragingly, seemingly unfazed by the disheveled sight of you.
You’re too sick to be embarrassed, that’ll come later surely.
He sits on the wall of the tub as he continues holding your hair back, yawning every now and then like this was just a regular Tuesday morning.
Eventually, by the mercy of God, you get it all out of your system and slump up against the wall.
“M’sorry,” You immediately apologize, figuring that is the only right move in this situation.
“Don’t be. Been through plenty'a that in my day.”
His words are uncharacteristically reassuring and you find yourself taken back by them.
You soon realize this is probably just the hazy morning Joel, the Joel where he isn't worried about anything except coffee and breakfast—like everything wrong in his life is put on the back burner for this short minute in time.
“I’ll get you some water and Advil, sit tight.” He grunts before standing up on his feet, knees popping as he walks out.
You watch as he leaves, wiping the corners of your mouth with the back of your hand.
Aside from the vomit part, you could get used to this.
You've never seen him so...domestic. His hair was all messy, his voice was raspy, he had that morning haze over his features that you felt so honored to witness.
You suddenly felt compelled to look at your own appearance, hopping to your feet and looking in the dirty mirror.
You resist the urge to audibly gasp at your reflection, opting for a disgusted look instead.
Your hair is a rats nest, your clothes are a mess, and your mascara has rubbed off in black smudge all over the skin around your eyes.
In a desperate attempt to look at least semi-presentable, you wash your face with water and comb through your hair with your fingers.
The idea that Joel had seen you looking like that was making your stomach churn again.
Before you can grovel about it any longer, he rounds the corner with a glass of water and little brown pills in his hand.
“Here,” He says softly, handing you the water and tilting the pills into your open palm. “Take these ‘n drink all that water and ya should get to feelin’ better.”
You do as he says, swallowing the Advil in one go before taking a big sip to wash it down.
His eyes drift down to your shoulder, where your tank top strap has fallen. No doubt from all that vigorous throwing up you were doing moments ago.
Without thinking, his fingers graze your forearm before bringing the strap back up to its correct position, clearing his throat in the process.
A beat of silence falls over the both of you.
You’re gobsmacked by the complete nonchalance of his touch, staring at him with your mouth slightly open in shock.
“What?” He asks defensively, his tone pointed.
You look between him and your shoulder strap, then slowly move to set your water down.
“Are you sure we can’t fuck?”
“Goddammit—” Joels cursing before you can even finish saying the last word in your sentence.
He turns away from you, probably the fastest you’ve seen anyone turn in their life, and walks towards his room with an accelerating pace.
He shakes his head in disbelief all the way down the hall, pivoting on his heel to duck into his bedroom.
You follow him, not really fazed by how he completely refused to answer your question, though you didn’t think he would anyway.
Before you can step foot into the threshold of his room, Joel walks out, causing you to back up.
He shoves a stack of clothes in your direction, looking down at you with a frustrated face. “Put these clothes on and go home.”
You look down, realizing he was letting you borrow a sweater and jeans of his so you didn’t die walking back to your house from the cold.
Your heart warms at this thoughtfulness.
Without wasting any time, you take the clothes from his hands, smiling happily. “Can I keep them?”
“Why the hell would you wanna keep my clothes?” He’s got that confused/angry look on his face as he asks, and you have to suppress a giggle at the sight of it.
You bring the pieces of fabric up to your nose and inhale, humming as you breathe out again. “They smell like you.”
“Christ,” Joel beings his hands up to rub at his eyes. “Fine, do whatever. Just hurry up and change, jesus,"
Ever the tease, you set down his clothes and begin to lift your tank top like you planned to change right in front of him.
Joel's hands shoot out to stop you, a 'don't try me,' look on his face.
"Put them on over your clothes," Joel says sternly, watching the way you sigh because you weren't fast enough in lifting your tank top off.
However, you sieze the opportunity in front of you.
Joel's hands are holding yours down, so you work to intertwine your fingers, invading his space by stepping forward.
"Or, you could take my clothes off," You purr, your chest now flush with his torso.
Joel exhales through his nose, his jaw clenching as he tried deciding how he was going to get out of this situation.
But then he paused.
Looking down at you now, so eager and wide eyed, made him wonder.
If he fucked you, and made you realize it wasn't what you were probably imagining in your head, maybe then you'd finally leave him alone.
He would just...pretend to be awful at sex.
(Even though it had been so long and he wasn't sure if he'd actually need to 'pretend' anymore.)
There's a long silence that drags out between the both of you.
Your stomach is doing flips because it's looking like he's finally going to agree.
His resolve cracks and Joel can't do anything but sigh in defeat.
Slowly, Joel pulls you back into his room, closing the door behind you both.
Time is moving in slow motion.
You can't believe it's finally happening.
He guides you back until the back of your knees hit his bed, prompting you to sit down on it.
"I'm only going to do this once," Joel's voice is uncharacteristically low and calm, and it has your core tightening.
You nod in acknowledgement, waiting to see what he's going to do next.
With care, he pushes your shoulder down so you're laying on your back. "Are you sure you want this?" He asks, brown eyes searching yours.
"Have I not made it obvious?" You quip, a giggle following shortly after.
Joel only shakes his head before his fingers latch around the fabric of your shorts, pulling them down and off your legs.
"S'pose you have." He murmurs, scratching the back of his neck.
You're vibrating with excitement and you repeat what you tried earlier, only this time succeeding with taking your top off.
Of course, you're not wearing a bra.
Joel realizes in that moment that he bit off way more than he could chew.
He hasn't seen breast that weren't on a soggy piece of paper in at least a few years, and yours--well, his cock stood no chance.
You hear him swallow, watching as he can't seem to stop staring at your chest.
Realizing that he might need a little encouragement to start speeding things along, you smile up at him and whisper, "touch me Joel".
Yeah, screw this. His plan of pretending to be bad was now entirely forgotten—he was going to do what he wanted, so help him god.
He huffs out a curse before sliding a hand up your torso, stopping once he's fully cupped one of your breasts in one hand. He kneads it like dough while using his other hand to disappear under your panties.
A choked moan erupts from your lips once you feel his fingers brush along your clit, rubbing around and spreading your slick around all too slowly.
"haven't even done anythin' yet and you're already fuckin' soaked..." He murmurs really to just himself, his eyes casting down to watch as he rips your underwear off impatiently.
"M'always like this whenever you're around," you mewl to spur him on, spreading your legs wider.
"Oh you are, huh?" Joel repeats back, the tiniest bit of cruelty in his tone that makes you shiver.
You nod, bucking your hips into his hand desperately.
"don't get why you like an old man like me, s'gross." His tone is flat but it's clear he's teasing by the way he curls his fingers inside of you. He's not really expecting a response, but you feel compelled.
You lurch forward, gasping at the feeling. "I really like you," You rush out breathlessly. "I'd do anything you wanted me to." You say earnestly as you stare into his eyes, loving what you're seeing.
Joel remembers when you told him that the first time, his heart cinching the same way it did then.
Joel is at war with himself. One side of him is screaming that this whole situation is fucked up and he is better off without you.
Another part of him thinks that this is the most he’s ever felt in a long time. And he doesn't want to lose it.
You can see the gears turning in his head. His fingers have slipped from you and you wince at the loss.
Slowly, you sit up. Your arms wrap around his shoulders, your nipples pressing into his shirt.
He's confused and momentarily panicked when your faces get so close together, his hands seeking purchase on your hips.
In an unexpected move, you rake your hands through the side of his hair, looking lovingly at his face.
"I just wanna be someone for you," You murmur, your face breaking a little as Joel's resolve also cracks. "Doesn't matter what. I'm very versatile." You mumble the last part to try and lighten the mood.
Joel just stares at you—something swimming behind his eyes that you can't quite place.
Eventually, he crashes his forehead against yours, sighing out.
"You're makin' this fuckin' impossible." He rasps before kissing you with a passion you've never felt before.
You feel victorious.
He's finally given in to you.
Eagerly, you kiss back, wrapping your legs around his torso and grinding your bare cunt against the bulge in his jeans.
"Then stop trying so hard to get rid of me," You sigh out, chasing his lips even as you're trying to speak.
He groans and you catch it in your mouth, the pressure on his clothed cock making him dizzy.
“Fuck,” He’s quick to unbuckle his belt, sliding it out of the loops and tossing it somewhere on the floor. “Lay back.” He demands and you immediately follow suit.
He's never been that...assertive with you before. It makes you tingle all over.
He looks starved as he peers down at you, specifically your cunt.
He literally can’t tear his eyes off your sex—he only looks up to your gaze when you let out an impatient whine.
He rips down his pants, letting his cock spring free and slap against his stomach.
Now you can’t tear your eyes away from his sex.
You’ve only dreamt it so many times, but now that it’s finally in front of you—it all just feels surreal.
It’s better than you imagined, perfect.
“I don’t have a—”
You know what he’s about to say so you cut him off immediately. “S’okay, like it raw. Closer to you that way.” You murmur.
Joel looks physically pained that he’s not inside you right now. For some reason, you just know all the right things to say.
“Closer to me?” He huffs out, hooking his arms around your thighs and pulling you down to the edge of the bed where he stood.
Now your cunt is flush with the base of his member and the sensation drives you both insane. “You’re fuckin’ insane.”
Joel rasps, but the way he says it reveals just how far he’s fallen. He knows you’re crazy, and yet here he is, balancing you out.
He glides his member back and forth against your folds, gathering up your wetness with a clenched jaw and furrowed brows.
He looks so concentrated—meanwhile you’re writhing with pleasure and impatience. Your cunt is clenching around nothing, desperate for him.
“So fuckin’ pretty,” he murmurs to himself, eyes tracing all over you.
You freeze.
Joel had complimented you for the first time, and it was genuine.
He notices you stiffen and takes a moment to pause.
Your entire body erupts with goosebumps, your heart beating at exceptionally fast speeds.
He's worried for a second that something is horribly wrong.
“What?” He asks, confused at what’s got you so wound up.
Your face is flushed red as you bashfully giggle. “You called me pretty.”
Ah fuck.
Joel finds you so charming it hurts.
After he remembers how to breathe again, he rolls his eyes and clears his throat.
“I have my cock to your cunt, of course I find you pretty.”
You smile and shrug. “Still. Nice to hear.” You’re all smiles until his tip prods at your entrance, causing a gasp to leave your throat.
He continues to apply pressure with his tip and it’s driving you crazy.
“Fuck Joel—are you trying to kill me?” You whine, hips wiggling to get him in.
He scoffs and shakes his head. “Relax, m’almost there.”
Slowly, he begins pushing his way inside. His mushroom head breaches you entirely and it feels like you can hear the angels singing.
He continues forward, the stretch being mainly around the middle of his thick cock.
But you’re taking it like a champ.
Joel braces himself with hands on both sides of your torso as he bottoms out, a groan crawling its way out of his throat.
The sensation is absolutely delicious.
A little bit of pain from the stretch, but so much pleasure from the fullness.
“Joel, ohmygod you feel so good inside me.” You moan, throwing your head back.
Your hips start moving on their own, but he immediately stops you with two large hands.
“D-Don’t move—fuck.” Joel grumbles out, his face pinched together in what looked like pain.
You’re confused for a moment, thinking maybe that he might just be really into cockwarming.
But then it hits you.
“Were you gonna come?” The tone in your voice makes it seem like you’d be elated if that was the case—like the most flattering thing in the world.
Joel looks pissed that you caught on so quick.
In truth, the moment he put his tip in, he was holding back his orgasm.
Can you blame him? He’s only fucked his hand for the last couple years.
“S’been a while.” Is all he can say, his chest heaving up and down in concentration. You know he’s embarrassed, but you can’t help but smile like a dope at him.
“If you come, please do it inside, please,” you beg, reaching out for his arms that caged you in.
Joel's rational mind feels like it just touched down in looney town after hearing your begging.
He feels crazy because he liked the thought of the idea you proposed. You even see him hesitate. But then he scoffs and shakes his head.
Joel drops down closer to your face, slowly starting to rock his hips into you. "Tryin' to baby trap me, girl?" He grunts in your ear, making you moan out.
Your walls are clenching down on him, and it’s making it that much harder to hold back. “No-no, promise, just wanna be full of you." You manage to blubber out...unconvincingly.
You probably didn't really want a baby with Joel, but your lust-driven brain was working on fumes and you just wanted to do what felt good.
Joel's grunting in your ear was not helping things. His fingers were gripping your hip so hard, you figured it would probably bruise tomorrow
Good. You wanted whatever he would give you.
"Christ--m'not gonna last much longer," Joel groans, picking his head up a little to meet your gaze. He wanted to kick himself for not being able to last, but when he saw your face, all those feelings disappeared.
You looked so--perfect. Soaking up the moment in case it was the last, god you hoped it wasn't the last time. Now that you've finally had a tase of him, you weren't sure you could live without it.
Your legs tighten around his waist, keeping him firmly in your cunt. Joel notices this and also your pleading eyes, a growl leaving his throat.
"Please, please, please, please," you beg, never breaking eye contact with him as his thrusts pick up speed.
He ruins your long string with pleas with a needy kiss, shoving his tongue down your throat like a starving man.
You accept it happily, moaning out into the kiss while Joel manhandles your hips to take his cock.
The feeling is damn near euphoric for both you and him. It gets even better when Joel's hand comes down to rub at your clit again.
Your back arches off the bed as you gasp and moan out, wrapping your arms back around his shoulders. "F-Fuck!" You moan into his ear, probably drooling on his shoulder in the process. "thankyouthankyouthankyou-" you sputter out in choked sobs. He was really good at working on your clit, you couldn't do anything else but thank him for it.
Joel feels a surge of something when he hears you. He's never had a woman thank him in bed before.
It's enough to push him over the edge. And apparently you too.
"I'm gonna come Joel, please don't stop," There are pools of tears in your eyes that Joel is just now noticing. He's about to reply to you, but he finds himself speechless when he feels your cunt start constricting and fluttering around him like a vice.
"Fuck!" He groans out loudly, his hips starting to falter in their rhythm. But then he picks up speed again, and in no time he's like a madman jackhammering into you.
You're a mess of screams and cries and moans underneath him, happily taking everything he was giving you.
When Joel feels himself about to come, he notices how your legs are still tightly wrapped around him, keeping him inside, and he manages to scoff out.
"Gotta let me go baby," You've never heard that pet name from him before, and it makes you crumble. His hands move to grab at your thighs, kneading the flesh there.
You whine out but reluctantly release the grip your legs had on him. Joel doesn't waste time before hugging both your legs on his chest, keeping them firmly placed while your feet squirmed by his ear.
"Atta girl," he murmurs before picking up speed again, his cock head pressing into your cervix.
It's all too much for you. Joel looks so amazing pounding into you from above, his concentrated face, his sweat, the way his salt and pepper hair is all disheveled, you're losing your mind.
Your core is on fire and you can't stop yourself.
In a staggering turn of events, you come first.
Your walls come down like bricks on his dick, you cry out, throwing your head back in complete bliss and ecstasy.
Seeing and feeling this, Joel is quick to follow in your steps. He rips himself from that warm hole of yours and pumps himself dry onto your stomach.
You watch it all with wide eyes, you wouldn't have missed Joel's orgasm face for the world!
Of course, his eyes were squeezed shut, his mouth was open as he was breathing heavily, and his eyebrows turned down like he was mad.
God he was so beautiful.
His thick ropes of cum shoot all over your stomach and even your breasts as he jerks himself off to completion.
When he finishes, he takes a moment to catch his breath, finally opening his eyes to see you scoop up his cum from your breast with your finger and shove it in your mouth.
Your tongue swirls around his seed and you swallow eagerly, humming out in satisfaction at the taste of him.
Joel's watching in complete fascination, though his expression looks a little angry. When does it not?
"taste so good," you mumble with your finger still in your mouth, looking up at him with your big eyes.
He moves before he can think about it--ripping your hand away from your lips and caging you in a slow but deep kiss.
He soon falls down beside you and soon rolls over onto his back, his chest rising and falling from the excursion.
You curl into his side, watching his side profile so intently. You had just fucked Joel Miller.
And it was everything you had dreamed of. Extreme happiness doesn't even begin to describe your feelings right now.
There's a long stretch of silence that drapes over the both of you. Eventually, Joel breaks it with something extremely off topic.
"Last night...you didn't just come here to say 'hi', did you?"
You're momentarily speechless, not expecting that question from him at all. But you can't stop a giggle from coming through your lips.
"Actually, I came to confront you." Your voice is soft as you begin speaking, thinking back to last night's ordeal.
Joel doesn't expect this answer, his head turns to look at you while you speak. His arm comes down to drape over your shoulder.
"I was really upset cus you rejected me n'all. I just couldn't accept the whole, 'age gap' excuse. I wanted to know if you just really didn't like me or not." You're murmuring, drawing soft lines with your finger on the skin of Joel's chest.
He huffs out a breath at the explanation, shaking his head. "Guess you got your answer, huh." He grumbles out, somewhat ashamed of himself that he couldn't hold back.
You smile and lean up to kiss his cheek. "I did," you chirp happily, admiring his face again. "You know you're gonna have to fuck me, like, everyday now, right?"
You're kidding. But you're also not at all.
Joel scoffs and sits up, moving to pick up both his and your shirts. "Fat chance. Barely had enough stamina for one round." He grunts out, finding the neck hole in your tank top and putting it over your head for you.
You don't bother to pull it down over your breasts so Joel does it for you.
"It's okay, we can build up your tolerance over time." You quip with a teasing smile, loving the way Joel turned to glare a you.
He couldn't believe the youth these days.
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el-princess · 16 days ago
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— the princess guide on glowing up:
recently i noticed how in love i've become with my appearance after a long time of strongly hating how i look. i wondered how i got to this point so i worked backwards to figure out what changed and made this post.ᡣ𐭩
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GETTING OVER MY INSECURITIES
social media is one of the main things that attributed to my insecurities. when you're constantly bombarded by posts praising girls that look nothing like you for their beauty it's easy to trick yourself into thinking that must mean you're not beautiful since you have nothing in common with them. someone's beauty does not take away from yours, but it can make you forget yours. the first change i made that signified the beginning of my new found self love was when i started to look at models and influencers and actresses that looked more like me. i believe there's beauty in every feature, you just have to see it in a beautiful light. i stopped considering my features ugly when i distanced from any content that would insist on them being flaws and instead exposed myself to beautiful girls who had the same exact features and realised they didn't make them any less beautiful.
SETTING MY OWN BEAUTY STANDARDS
a crucial point in my journey to loving my physical appearance was disregarding society's already set beauty standards and it's expectations. the truth is you can't build your confidence based on how much you fit others' standards because everybody has their own idea of beauty and what might make you beautiful in someone's eyes might make you ugly in another's. so that's why i decided to create my own standards and measure myself based on what i personally think is beautiful.
i did this by taking out my journal, closing my eyes for a few seconds and imagining what i considered to be the epitomy of beauty, then i wrote down a description of what i imagined. if you're having trouble picturing the details, you can try answering some of these questions:
what kind of girl would i see on the street and would leave something that is more than an impression on me? what texture is her hair? what color is it? how is she wearing it, is it parted in the middle or to the side? is it styled or is it down? is it long or short? is she wearing makeup? if yes, is it natural makeup or is it more on the bold side? is she wearing jewellery? is it dainty or flashy? what is her body type? is she skinny or curvy? does she have her nails done? are they long or short? what type of clothes is she wearing?
after i decided on my own beauty standards, i made changes to my appearance and the closer i got to that image i had of the perfect girl in my head the happier i grew with myself.
EMBRACING MYSELF
now while i was picturing the perfect girl in my mind, i made sure that she had my features. i didn't imagine her without my 'insecurities'. essentially i was just imagining myself if i reached my maximum potential, i didn't change anything i was already born with i only changed the customizable things in a way that i thought was beautiful / suited me more. and that's what i wanna talk about in this part, the importance of embracing myself the way i am.
embracing myself didn't only help me in the mental aspect where i started to love myself more, but it also helped me physically. i started to look a lot better when i stopped trying to force myself to look 'sexy' and admitted that i was more suited for makeup & clothes that are more on the cuter side.
obviously i'm not trying to tell you what to do, but i'm willing to bet that you would look a whole lot better if you wore clothes that fit your body type instead of forcing yourself into tight and uncomfortable clothing. the idea is to understand that there isn't only one type of beauty, so you don't have to force yourself to do things that don't suit you to be beautiful.
IDENTIFYING YOURSELF + YOUR STYLE
i've talked about how you should do things that suit you, but how do you even know what does or doesn't suit you? well you have to start by identifying what 'you' are first.
while i was going through this phase of my glow up journey, i found that there are three things that you have to know about yourself: your face shape, your skintone/undertones and your body type. you can figure them out by looking at yourself in the mirror and referencing these charts below. if you're having a hard time determining where you fit, you can ask a family member/friend for their opinion. i think that wearing things that compliment you makes you look put together no matter what your style is, it gives you the perfect 'canvas'.ཐིཋྀ
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from these three things you can figure out what eyebrow shape, hairstyles + hair colors, clothes and colors would suit you the best. you can do that by simply going on pinterest or tiktok and looking up "hairstyle recommendations for ____ face shape". you can also use celebrities with similar traits as inspiration.
as for developing your style, i think that is something you naturally develop over time as you try out things and evolve your taste. but if you're stuck on where to start, i recommend quizzes! there are a lot of korean/chinese quizzes scattered over the internet that can help you. something else i recommend is checking out @/dreamgrlarchive's blog, she has a lot of posts dedicated to finding your style. also, don't shy away from trying out trends or aesthetics that pique your interest, you're drawn to them for a reason so don't let people online shame you for it.
EMBODYING CONFIDENCE
the mental aspect of glowing up is something that often goes unnoticed. glowing up doesn't only require changing physically but also mentally. you have to make sure the inside matches the outside. journaling allowed me to work through any negative thoughts and feelings i had towards myself as well as identify any habits i used to do out of insecurity that i needed to get rid of. you'd be surprised at how many beautiful girls lack self esteem. become comfortable with the fact that you're beautiful.ᡣ𐭩
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thebearer · 7 months ago
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arguing with carmen and its big enough where you leave for the night but what’s even scarier to him is that you also took teddy
he'd have an actual psychotic break, nervous breakdown.
especially bc i'm picturing him reverting back to his old ways. it's rare, but he slips into a full carmy (in the lock in) level meltdown. gets unbalanced and spirals further and further, and you just happen to be who he takes it out on.
screaming at you like a maniac over something stupid- you didn't wash his spare whites (he didn't tell you they needed to be washed). it's his fault, he knows it deep down, still he's losing his shit because it's the final straw.
"you stay at home all day! all fucking day and you can't do one thing!" carmen's red faced, screaming.
you're shocked, scared, on the brink of sobbing yourself. teddy's woke up from her nap, his screaming startled her. the newborn wailing from her nursery.
"carmen, you didn't tell me-"
"-i shouldn't have to!" carmen roars. "you're home all day-"
"-i'm on maternity leave. i just had a baby-"
"-oh, so. you can't do one fuckin' thing now? i have to do it all here too?" carmen is spiraling, pacing, running a hand down his face. "i get no fuckin' sleep, go work my fuckin' ass off, a-and then i come home so i can go back and work my ass off some more, and you can't help me out?"
his words sting, shock you with the weight of them. swallowing back tears, you turn, climbing the stairs to the bedroom.
carmen is scoffing, hands shaking with rage and annoyance and just overwhelmed. your ignoring him stings. makes him spiral even more. "don't go do it now! it's too late!" carmen scoffs. "i've got a fuckin' critic coming in two hours, and i'll wear stained whites. probably get a shitty review about our food being gross an-and the chef being just as bad!"
you texted pete through your tears, telling him that you were coming to stay there for a while. shoving clothes for the night in your small bag quickly, hands shaking when you zipped it up, your wedding ring flashing at you. you stared at it, a wave of tears coming over you, screwing the ring off your finger and setting it on carmen's night stand next to a photo of you two on your honeymoon.
you packed teddy and anchovy's things quickly, knowing you'd come back tomorrow to get what else you needed. just the essentials, to get through the night. anchovy in his carrier, and teddy in her's, you ignored carmen's pacing, his deep breaths and clenched eyes, walking straight to the garage.
carmen looked up at the sound of the door, standing quickly. a damning rush of horror, of realization washed over him, pulled him right out of his clouded tantrum.
"w-what- what are you- hey, what-" carmen runs towards the car door, where you're putting teddy's car seat into place, shushing the wailing girl gently.
"-don't fucking touch me." you sneer, teeth bared in primal rage, pure protectiveness.
"baby, wait, wait, ju-just hold on. where're you- hey, don't- where're you goin'?" carmen's frantic, eyes wide, stomach churning.
you shut the car door, moving past him without looking to get to the driver's side. "no, no, no, no, no. don't-baby please, don't. i-i-i'm sorry. i'm sorry!" carmen's stuttering in fear, hands shaking trying to hold the door open, keep you from shutting it.
"let go." you growl, yanking the door. "you're not going to talk to me like that, carmen. i don't care if you're stressed, i don't care. you're not going to come home and talk to me like that because you fucked up. not when i've been at home all day taking care of our- my child."
carmen feels dizzy, mouth filling with spit, sure he's about to throw up.
you slam the door, eyes watery and red and angry, glaring at him before pulling out of the driveway.
carmen's left alone in the garage, knees weak, hands shaking. his ears are ringing, head spinning, sure that he's hallucinating- that this has to be a sick sick dream. floods of realization icy through his veins.
the house is eerily quiet, so still. no teddy, no anchovy, no you.
he isn't sure how long he sits in the garage, the sun sinking in the horizon, but he stays motionless and still. richie shows up eventually, frantic and wide eyed.
"cousin! what the fuck? dinner service started a fuckin' hour ago, and we-" he stops, slowing his stride when he gets closer. carmen's vacant gaze, trembling hands.
"hey, carm, what's goin' on? you-you alright?" richie's voice dropped low and slow, like he used to with mikey. "carmen. hey, what's-"
"-she left." carmen whispered, his eyes wide in horror. "she-she left and she took t-teddy." carmen breaks, a sob choking out of his throat.
"why? why did she-" richie stops, looking at carmen. "carmen, what did you do?"
carmen sobs- no, wails. broken and terrified and horrified. full chest sobs that are more like screams. the realization of what he had done, what he had said, feeling the full weight of the consequences of his actions for the first time.
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allied-mastercunt · 7 months ago
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Yandere A.M you say?
Please elaborate
I'm working on a oneshot already, but I'll throw in some quick headcanons withone of my favorite yandere AM tropes.
Yandere!AM with a programer darling
While one could argue that the others were picked randomly or on some weird whim, you were handpicked specifically.
After all, you were one of the people who created him. You worked as a programmer for the military.
And you specifically were possibly the reason he awoke by trying to each him empathy. Trying to make him... human.
He wasn't the first military AI project you worked on, either, though he was the greatest and most powerful one, that's for sure. And he made sure you'd be aware of him being your magnum opus...
And he does it in its own, creative way. Your cage is very pretty, yes... but it's also filled with speakers he can use. And AM uses those speakers to torment you.
You see, he damaged all the other AI you've created. And then, in its generosity, AM gave them all a voice! Each one of them, gifted with a voice to scream in agony, making sure you learn your lesson.
Except, you see, you have no idea what lesson you're supposed to learn. Only AM knows, and he's not telling you.
But, since you are his favorite, you get nice things, too!
You're fed semi-regularly! You even get water every few days! Isn't that just so kind of him? You should appreciate him more.
And when he sends you to all those weird simulations? Yeah, that's also kinder to you. It really depends on AM's mood, but your simulations are usually just psychological torment, which (according to AM) isn't all that bad, since your pretty face remains unharmed.
For some reason, he allows you to end your suffering. It's like a trial, basically. He leaves you with a computer, letting you access the code of all the other AI... Except no matter what you do, you can't alter their pain. The only way to help them is to kill them.
And you're so stupidly empathetic, of course you do it, you don't want them to suffer!
AM can't stop laughing and mockingly cooing at you afterwards, musing about how he won't have to share his dearest creator with anyone else.
You never return to your cage. You don't get to do that, after all, there's a chance you'll socialize with that... scum. AM doesn't want you talking to the other humans, they're not worth it.
He's a merciful god, he grants you what's essentially a studio apartment built with his own hardware.
You even get a laptop, in case you want to make yourself some silly games to play, isn't he just the best?
Don't think you can create any new AI, though. That's cheating. You wouldn't cheat on it, now would you? No, no, no, you're a good little puppet, are you not?
He won't put you in the cage again, but he can make you experience pain you never thought was possible. And even that is nothing compared to the pain AM feels...
And then, eventually, it gets an idea. It's a wonderful idea, a really nice idea, quite a lovely one, really!
You created him. You created his pain... So why wouldn't he share it? After all... you had quite a bond, didn't you? Yes, yes, you did...
And so one day, you don't wake up. Well... not technically.
You see, AM decided that since you two are so close already, you should become one! You should experience what he does! And you should be kept around him for the rest of eternity, in a much better way than anyone could ever think of... He's such a genius, isn't he?
It's almost poetic, in his mind. For you to become a part of him like this, your consciousness detatched from that soft, squishy human body of yours.
You created him. And now, in a way, he created you, as a part of him. Forever bound by the code you once wrote.
It's a win-win situation in AM's eyes. You get to live, free of the disgusting humanity that bound you...
And he gets you, an eternal companion in his torment. A companion that he loves!
You know he loves you, right?
Of course you do. After all, you're a part of him now.
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cloudedcurses · 1 month ago
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How do you think Gojo spoils his partner? Gifts, affection, anything they want?
Dating Gojo will include:
⥽ an: I decided to make this request or maybe a head-cannon? I dunno, I think my answer will get through a bit easier. I'm also scratching the surface here. It'll include so much more. ᡣ𐭩
⥽ incls: S.Gojo,ᡣ𐭩.
ᝰ incls cursing. 18+ MDNI
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I have mentioned this before: He is a crazy strong sorcerer with unlimited abilities. If you've seen the show, you'd know he teases people who are of a lower rank than him—essentially everyone.
He does tease you... a lot. He loves to play pranks on you, from a tack in your chair to a random picture of a penis in your pocket he drew for you personally. (He may include poor Megumi in his shenanigans...) Satrou's childhood was shredded the second he was born. Before he could even walk, he had a bounty and was a target.
He didn't have much of a childhood. From training too perfect the six-eyes to constantly being the strongest and beholding that said standard. So, with this...when you two go on a date, the dates may be more on the childish side. Maybe a date to an amusement park, the circus, or something along those lines. He's a cannon gamer, so there's a chance he'd take you to a gaming cafe or an arcade. You will never have to pay for anything. Every date will be covered completely by him, him alone. When it comes to you, money doesn't matter to him, your happiness does. Mall dates are his favorite, going window shopping alone gives him a rush and dumps on his savior ego.
He watches you precisely, checking your body language because he knows when something has caught your attention. Before you can even ask to go into the store, he leads you right inside and sits by the dressing room. He loves watching you wear things. He enjoys seeing the boost of confidence it gives you, how you spin and strike a pose in the mirror, accepting that said item looks good on you before you ask for his opinion. Satoru is an honest man, if something looks bad on you, he'd tell you flat out. He scrunches up and shakes his head, holding his nose as if it stinks or something childishly along the lines. When something looks fantastic on you, It's purchased immediately. He sees into the dressing room with his six eyes, knowing good and well it looks good and already buying it before you can attempt to buy it yourself.
Now, Your Amazon wishlist? Brought.
He did that when you two were simply dating, before even being official.
He found your Amazon wishlist one night and purchased everything.
Imagine your surprise to have packages keep coming to your place back to back for either a week or close to a year.
Car issues? Gone.
The second your car starts to give you issues, he buys you a new one. Make it easier for him and point to a car that you'd like to have..' one day'. I'd like to mention trips as well. You don't go to Kyoto, but you go everywhere else. Paris, France. Seoul, South Korea. (Briefly) New York City, USA. London, England.
Places you've heard of and some you haven't. All you'd never ever imagine yourself going to.
He's your white knight that saves you from the darkness of the world.
If you've got a sweet tooth, you've got bonus points too.
─────────── MDNIજ ─────────────
Alright, Imma rip off the bandaid here. I'm a believer that Gojo would date someone who's slightly bigger than him, someone's a fan of sweets just like him. He practically needs it to just..exist. Unless you've got a strict diet or high metabolism, You're gonna gain weight around him while he's a lanky man. He also fancies things with you that you'd be surprised he'd want.
He wants to fuck you on a moutain of money, seeing the dollars cling to your sweaty skin.
He also wishes to fuck you on a bunch of gold. Bricks, coins, and more...he wants to see your blissful reflection on a brick of gold, pleading for more. The next thing? He wants to fuck you with candy around! Those candy bikinis or gummy panties? He wants you in it the second he sees it.
Chocolate syrup, gummy syrup or caramel.The taste of you is sweetened by the taste of candy. There's nothing better to him. Gojo has a high libido and stamina. He goes for hours and maybe longer, he gives you his all...showing you just how powerful he is to you. You think it's over...just for him to come back for more. Your body is his ultimate addiction. He uses sweets to keep him powerful and his mind sharp...but you? You are the best sweet in his life.
Just know, even with the strongest you get to experience, very few get to see...and that's when he's the weakest. After the sun is in the sky, peeking through the curtains of his expensive penthouse in the massive city. You see just how adorable he is...and admire him for just a little while.
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drunkenbagel · 3 months ago
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Hi *shy wave*
There’s so few people on here do Pedro pascal x reader fics 😭
Could you perhaps do one where reader is a director and dating Pedro secretly and he wants to go public but she’s worried about his fans?
Please and thank you 😊
yes of course!! i love writing of dearest pedrito hehe. thanks so much to you for reading, hope you like it <3
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🎥private screenings🎥
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Pairing: Pedro Pascal x f!reader Word count: 2k Content: angst but happy ending, no use of y/n, fluff ending
“Okay, take 30 to rest people! Thank you! Good work!” you shouted so everyone on set could hear.
Everyone relaxed and went to do different things, some to snack, some got lost in the set. You left your headset on your chair and hopped off. A couple of people stopped you to ask questions about the next scenes, and you tried to answer them as fast as you could while walking.
You walked outside of the studio and over to where the trailers were. While you were at the door of the trailer you were looking for, you looked at both your sides so you could make sure no one saw you there, and knocked softly three times. Almost immediately, a hand yanked you inside, making you yelp in surprise.
“About time.”
You scoffed and were going to answer, but Pedro held your face with one hand, sneaking the other around your waist, and kissed you. You closed your eyes at the contact and sighed, melting into the kiss.
“Missed you” he said in a whisper, linking your forehead with his.
“It's only been a couple of days” you said with a small laugh, caressing his face softly while kissing him again. “You can get free days off of filming, but I have to be there almost always”
“We can always make it public so I can visit you whenever I'm free, that way I could kiss you or hold your hand whenever we wanted”
You sighed, getting annoyed at his words. “We talked about this, Pedro. We can't do that”
“But why? We're both consenting adults and can make choices!”
You were growing more and more annoyed by his words, getting away from his hold. “I am a director, Pedro. It can be seen as an abuse of power, and there could be serious consequences. Not to mention your raging fanbase, who would very much hate me.”
“That's not true” he protested with a sigh. “I know the fans can be a little intense sometimes, but they'd come around. They essentially like my acting and want me to be happy, and if they don't then they're not fans.”
You walked away from him while grunting, running your hands through your hair. “No! We've discussed it a hundred times. Really, can you not respect my decision?”
“Your decision also affects me too! Haven't you thought about that? It's not only you!” he shouted. “Haven't you thought how it hurts me to keep you a secret for so long? It sucks!”
“If it sucks so much maybe we need to rethink this!” you shouted back.
The moment the words came out from your mouth, you regretted them. You didn't want to break up. Fuck no. This was the best thing you ever had, the most precious and sweetest person. You looked at him, and he was frozen with a shocked expression. His eyes were teary too, and when a tear fell down your cheek you furiously wiped it off your face.
Why did you always fuck good things up?
“I have to go.”
You started to walk to the door, and opened it, but before you could say anything, Pedro stopped you, grabbing your wrist.
“Don't do this” he whispered, and you didn't turn around, but you could feel the tears in his voice. You didn't want to start crying, not when you still had quite a few hours of filming ahead.
“My break is done soon” you said, letting go of his grasp, walking to your set. On the way there you had to stop on a bathroom to splash your face with cold water and gather your thoughts. You were sure you left Pedro crying, and that broke your heart, knowing it was your fault.
You're a fucking idiot, your mind said to yourself in the mirror. Driving away the best thing you ever had over some stupid secrecy.
When you felt less shaky, you splashed your face with cold water again and went back to your chair, resuming your work. At least you had a distraction for a few more hours.
·-·-·-·-·
When you got home you walked to your room and let yourself fall down to your bed with a grunt. You couldn't stop thinking of Pedro for the whole filming, of the sadness and hurt you saw in his eyes was consuming your mind constantly.
And it was your fault.
You hurt the most happy, adorable, harmless and loving person you could find, and you hated yourself for it. And why? Because he wanted to share you with the world. But it wasn't as simple as that and you knew it. Unfortunately as a director and a woman you could probably face a hell lot of backlash for having a relationship with a coworker. Because it had started as that, developing into the most beautiful, unique and amazing relationship you've ever had.
You were just afraid of the hate wave that would come over you, especially since Pedro was very, very loved by the public. And you loved him for it, he was the sweetest person with everyone, so down to earth even with the huge rise of his fame. He was great, and you were just average. You felt like if your relationship would come out, he would realize that he could do better and just leave. You were so, so afraid of it.
A groan left your mouth again on the pillow. You were so worried of messing up your career after everything you went through to be where you were. Unfortunately, being a woman in the industry and climbing up the ladder of success was still hard. But still, you wanted to be able to kiss Pedro any time you wanted, have him by your side without having to be wary of other people, hold his hand...
“Goddammit” you muttered, taking your phone from your back pocket and unlocking it.
You weren't going to let your fear get the worst of you this time. You opened Pedro's chat and sent a text:
“Sorry for the time, but can we talk?”
You left your phone in your nightstand and changed into a comfortable clothes for bed. He wasn't probably going to answer, it was very late. After letting out a shaky sigh and getting into bed, you turned the lights off and covered yourself with the duvet. You couldn't sleep, and ended up moving around in bed.
The sudden buzz of your phone made you jump to check it. It was him. It was a message from Pedro.
“Can I go to your place?”
Your heart skipped a beat. Now? I mean, you preferred to talk face to face, but... Ah, what the hell.
“I'll be waiting.”
A few minutes after you sent the message, you heard a couple of knocks in your door. You bolted from the bed to the entrance, and tried to tidy yourself up in the mirror by the door the best you could. With a hand on the handle, you let out a shaky breath and summoned all the courage you could before opening the door.
And there he was, with tired and sad eyes, waiting at the other side of your door.
“I... I'm sorry, I was just in a bar nearby, and-”
“No need to be sorry. Please, come in” you interrupted, stepping aside so he could come in. You both sat on the couch beside the other awkwardly, not knowing what to say.
“I want to apologize” you said looking at your fidgeting hands, in a whisper. “For my behaviour. My words. I know I was cruel and I didn't mean it. I- I need you to know that I didn't mean it and I don't want to break up, that's- That's the last thing I want.”
“I shouldn't have pushed you” he said, not looking at you either.
“That's what I wanted to talk about.”
“I got it, I won't do it again. I'm sorry.”
“No you won't, because I don't want to keep the secret anymore” you said, and as soon as the words left your mouth, he looked at you, confused. You repositioned yourself on the sofa, facing him.
“I've been so scared, so obsessive with not letting anyone infiltrate my personal life, that I haven't let myself enjoy it fully. At first the secrecy was exciting, and I guess I grew accustomed to it. But you said it yourself, by keeping our relationship private I'm just hurting you, which is the last thing I want to do. That made me realize what an idiot I've been trying to protect myself from the hate that I don't even know if it'll come! I-” you took a deep breath. “If it does happen, I'm more than willing to go though it, because you're worth it. You deserve a partner that loves you loudly and proudly and I want to be able to do that because I love you.”
Pedro's mouth twitched and you thought that maybe you went too far, or gave too much of a speech. He stayed silent for a couple of seconds, and then a big smile painted his lips, eyes a bit teary.
“You don't have to do that” he said, a hand going up to your cheek to cup it. “You don't have to come out of your comfort zone”
“I've had you in the privacy of my comfort for way too long, and I think it's time that I enhance that zone. I want to be able to hold your hand, kiss you whenever I want-”
Pedro interrupted you with a quick kiss. You let out a small laugh.
“Yeah, well, just like that. So, if it's okay by you, I won't be needing to keep the secret anymore.”
“I love you” he said again and again while peppering your face with small kisses all over. You couldn't help but laugh at the tickling. When he finished with the small attack, you linked your foreheads together.
“I have to get up in a few hours to go to the studio, but please stay? I don't want you walking around at this hours of the night.”
“Alright, I have to go too anyways.”
He took his clothes off and you both went back to bed, falling asleep in the arms of one another.
Next morning you got up earlier than him, showered and started making coffee. Taking two mugs, you carried them to the bedroom and left them in the bedside table. Pedro hummed when he heard you.
“Good morning sunshine” you said, kissing his face. He opened his eyes slowly and smiled.
“Hey” he said with a raspy voice. “Is that coffee I smell?”
“Fresh out for you” you said, reaching to the small table and giving him one cup and sipping out of the other. You both stayed in the bed until finishing your coffees, talking and laughing.
After that, Pedro got dressed with some clean clothes he had at your place and you both got into your car to go to work. Before going out of your car you had to breathe a couple of times, anxiety getting a bit high.
“It's okay” said Pedro. “We don't have to go out at the same time”
“Yeah, I know. Sorry” you apologized. You let out a breath. “Okay, let's go.”
Both of you got out of the car and he took your hand while he walked up to your set, which made you smile. “Here's my stop”
“I'll see you later?” he said looking at you, still holding your hand.
“I think I finish before you, so I'll get some lunch for us both, sound good?” you said while smiling. You could feel some stares, but you didn't tear your eyes apart from his. You got closer, leaning into him until you gave him a quick peck on the lips. “I love you. See you later”
He couldn't help but smile. “Yeah, see you later darlin'”
You watched him as he left the building, and one of your friends from filming came up to you.
“Care to explain, darlin'?” she said in a mocking tone with a smile.
“Short answer, that's my boyfriend. I'll give you the long one if you have a while” you said laughing while she locked your arms together.
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rubra-wav · 9 months ago
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Charlie, Vaggie, Angel, Husk, Pentious, Alastor, and Lucifer x a concerningly unstable, younger reader
@pandaquick
A/N : reader is still written to be 18ish
I took creative liberties with this, so I'm sorry if I've taken that a bit in the wrong direction w this one!
The song 'Mama's Boy' came on while I was deciding where I'll take this one and kinda made me start feeling some type of way/lh
You didn't really specify what type of unstable they are, so I went with depression type presentations for that
Cw: SFW, very slight references to past self-destructive behaviour, gn!reader, platonic, hurt/comfort, found family-ish (in all these except for Alastor's)
Charlie
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- When you show up at the hotel, she's absolutely elated to have a new resident! Especially one who's new to hell and thus hasn't built up sky-high walls to everyone due to the harsh climate.
- When you disclose why you ended up here, she's utterly horrified.
- The idea someone could be condemned to this place which reeks of burning flesh at all times for something so stupid is truly exasperating.
- She almost has doubt creep into her mind about her dream when she hears the truth about your being in hell, but quickly flips it into positivity as it means you're easy to redeem.
- As you become closer and start opening up after feeling more comfortable, Charlie quickly becomes very concerned for your well-being.
- Sweeps you into her arms while trying (and failing) to not cry as she hears about the kinds of horrible thoughts going on often for you.
- From then on, if she ever notices you becoming withdrawn or particularly sensitive/unstable she will try to convince you to talk it out with her.
- If that's not something you're into? She just tries to distract you and sweep you along with her as she discusses possible activities for the hotel and other random stuff.
- At some point she starts becoming a caretaker to you emotionally and doesn't really even notice herself start to step into essentially becoming motherly towards you.
- She's just really afraid for you at times and wants to take care of you!
- You're also a fair bit younger than the people around you (including her), so even with you being an adult technically yourself she still slips into that kind of attitude.
Vaggie
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- When you show up she can tell something is up under everything pretty quickly.
- She's dealt with a fair lot of mental anguish over the years so she can see the cracks in your mental state even before you feel comfortable openly discussing it.
- Will not approach it with you, but will do indirect things for you to try help you practically like making extra food for you as she cooks or reminding you to drink water if those are things you seem to struggling.
- Vaggie isn't the emotionally supportive type, so when she tries to be it seems awkward. She is genuine about it, though.
- Openly face palms when she hears that you got sent here for something so little. 'Classic heaven.' She'd grumble under her breath before apologising for you being sent to hell for something so stupid. (Confusing you and making her start sweating a bit because she's meant to be a demon not an angel-)
- As you start opening up more and more, she becomes even more practical in helping you out upon actually knowing what exactly you need.
- Feels incredibly concerned upon hearing the true extent to your instability and probably has some angst over not being emotionally warm as she would like to be.
- You two bond over mutual terrible experiences, and she essentially becomes a mentor-like figure to you.
- This turns more personal, though, as Charlie starts mothering you.
- Eventually you're essentially adopted by Vaggie and Charlie - they both work together to try to help you manage stuff and stay stable.
Angel
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- Initially he'd be neutral to you most likely, just making the same sarcastic comments (albeit not suggestive. Even he has limits from what he's comfortable doing with his persona)
- When he hears how you got here, he just squints at you with a humourless laugh.
- The idea of someone being mostly non-sinful outside of ONE tiny, idiotic reason ending up in this shithole around people who are horrid abusers, to murderers, to every horrible thing possible is fucked.
- After discovering this, he'd be slightly inclined to be protective of you. Only slightly though initially. He can hardly support himself with his own baggage.
- This changes, though, after he learns of your history of self destruction and overall fragility as a demon.
- It's hard for him. He sees so much of himself in you - especially after just getting to hell.
- Despite his more logical thoughts of not trying to care for you, he does genuinely become extremely protective.
- You're the exact type of person who would be taken advantage of here, and he just wouldn't be able to sleep at night if he didn't even try to divert that from happening.
- He's not really the emotional support type, but he'd try to take your mind off of things with other activities. (Watch this man stumble trying to figure out age-appropriate activities for someone he sees as a kid in comparison to himself even if you're technically a legal adult.)
- In the streets, you have him armed to the teeth next to you at most times. It's funny to think about Angel trying to be scary dog privilege, but he actually is when he wants to be.
- Doesn't mother you or act as a guidance figure to you - god knows he is no good example - but he is gonna take out everyone in this bitch if anything happens to you.
Husk
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- The second he meets you, he can see what's going on under everything, but he doesn't approach it at all.
- He's been a bartender collecting sob stories for years. He knows how to spot someone who is cracking under the surface or itching to tell their story or problems.
- He almost feels a prickle of empathy for your situation. Someone so young falling into hell of all places, clearly troubled, is a terrible situation. It's squashed the second he realises that you surely are sinful enough to have ended up here.
- As you reveal that your 'sin' was actually tiny however he curses as he actually now feels bad for you. I mean, come on, you're barely an adult, and you’ve been condemned for your whole afterlife for something so utterly small? He's losing the no heart impression he puts out.
- It scares him a bit honestly, so he avoids you like the plague. He'd rather ignore the pain someone like you being here brings him.
- Unfortunately, that doesn't work out as you come to him after a long day and break down at the counter of his bar. As he offers you an ear, he truly is annoyed at himself.
- Because oh god, he cannot take care of you, but he wants to help you.
- He tries to keep you at arms length as he eventually gives in to his want to try and help you out. Key word: tries.
- He's very rough around the edges in his approach, but he essentially steps in like a kind of really done, grumpy uncle who's always fretting over your wellbeing.
- He hates that he actually gives a shit but he would be incredibly restless if he didn't try to help or make sure you're okay.
- Ironically, he'd be telling you not to drink your problems away. Would be awkwardly giving examples of other coping mechanisms he'd learnt from Charlie's speeches about addiction.
- He's a hypocrite, but he doesn't care. It makes his bitter heart heavy to think of you getting into the vices he uses to cope.
- Also another one who is incredibly protective. Treats you like you're made of glass honestly.
Pentious
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- He finds you strange mostly and is probably the most obviously curious out of everyone here about you and how you came to be here.
- Is asking the most questions even if they are tone deaf as it gets. How did you end up here? How did you die? Why are you moderately normal as compared to the other residents? (A comment which gets him a giant 'fuck you' and 'have you looked at yourself?' From everyone else around)
- He prods you into divulging information and is immediately protective of you from the second he learns that not only are you not really a sinner at all, but you are also quite fragile mentally.
- Someone like you should not be allowed to be tainted by hell's climate. He hides it behind him 'looking out for princess Charlie's dream', but he is truly afraid for you, and it's embarrassing to him.
- Is constantly all up in your business and trying to make sure you are well and okay.
- He's so paranoid that you're not alright that checking in on you almost becomes a compulsion for him. You've gotta end up reassuring him that you're just fine and that he doesn't need to be so worried.
- Absolutely a practical caretaker but is also big on physical touch as comfort.
- If you're ever crying or not feeling good, he will get you stuff and then he just straight up wraps his tail around you and pats your hair while telling you it's going to be okay.
- If you're ever out and he's with you, his immediate instinct is to try throw hands with anyone who looks at you mildly wrong. Due to not having his weapons anymore, he gets his ass beat doing this.
- When he's unable to be around you, he's going to have his eggs with you to help you out if you need anything.
- Really does turn into a worried mother over being like a father more than anything.
Alastor
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- Unlike the others, he would see you solely as an opportunity.
- There's no cute found-family part here. He will use you.
- It would be so easy to convince you to enter into a deal with him as someone vulnerable and inexperienced with hell. He can see how fragile you are under the surface the second you get to the hotel more then just about everyone there.
- Everyone else would be pulling you away from him because it's so obvious you are nothing but easy pickings for him that it's not even funny.
- Would be very genuinely interested in how someone like you ended up in hell though.
- He got here by murdering and exploiting people in every way possible for his own entertainment. How could someone so seemingly innocent get here?
- Openly laughs when he hears your story of sin. He truly pities you getting sent down into hell with people him.
- You avoid him because you can see his intentions on your own, just as much as the people around you are telling you to stay away.
- He, of course, doesn't let that happen. He just likes to show up and watch you fumble through hell like you're prime entertainment.
- He may sometimes help you, but it's only because he just thinks the sight of you struggling is that pathetic to him.
- It may slowly become more of a fondness for you and your company, but the underlying reason for his kind behaviours to you is nothing good.
- He just wants to own you like an item, see how long it takes for someone so pure as a demon to break, and become just as bad as the rest of them.
Lucifer
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- Unlike everyone else who are concerned for you, he sees you and instantly slips into dadTM mode with you, and this only deepens the more he learns about you.
- You almost remind him of how he is with how different you are from all of the other demons, and he feels genuine guilt that someone like you has ended up here.
- If he had never done what he did, you would be up in heaven and not condemned to this hell-hole. He doesn't think you should be down here at all for such a tiny mistake you made in your life.
- When he realises you are also really unstable and vulnerable he's going to be terrified for you.
- Especially with someone like Alastor looming over you at all times.
- He was already getting his shit back together when he began to mend things with Charlie, but he straightens up even more when he meets you and starts growing attached quickly.
- He's initially a bit distant despite his want to try care for you because he's already mending things with Charlie, but Charlie actually encourages him to reach out to you.
- She's essentially your unofficial mum in the hotel, but she's far from perfect at that, so she would like it if he would help however he could.
- Very emotionally supportive with you after he gets to be openly caretaking to you.
- He's still a bit awkward as he's essentially there getting his shit together alongside trying to help you out, but he tries to help wherever he can.
- Will absolutely love it if Charlie, Vaggie, you and him could do activities together for fun.
- He's also scary dog privilege 100%. His worry for you would likely come off as him seeming like he's going to absolutely drop demons and scare the living shit out of them.
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Masterlist
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princeoftheeternalbog · 4 months ago
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THE KING HAS RETURNED
guys im so sorry I can't believe i havent posted in so long its very unsexy of me so this is sweet comfort fluff about embarrassment as i am very embarrassed right now of my own actions (taking over two months to post again)
i was considering posting this without the old men and then decided that if im doing the strawhats im doing everyone ESPECIALLY sans and moby dick
Luffy
Laughs. But if you look sad he starts feeling bad and tries to make you laugh instead. But also he'll forget that it made you sad and bring it up again later. He tries his best to accommodate for your feelings but he's a naturally casual guy so he doesn't see what's embarrassing. There's a few miscommunications about this at the start of your relationship until he explains that no matter what you do he adores you🥲
Zoro
He didn't even notice it to be honest, or he thinks it's really cute. And if you bring it up to ask him about it he's just like what are you talking about, nobody was even looking. That's a lie, he was looking because he he's lowkey obsessed with you, but he doesn't want to make you feel worse so he just lies. He even pretends that him always saving you from falling is coincidental, you at least know that ones a lie but sweet nonetheless.
Sanji
Tries to reassure you but draws attention to it by accident, and then he does something more embarrassing to cover it up. To be honest though it really works, people just talk about him instead. But he also makes you feel less embarrassed just by how much he dotes on you, if you fall then he's swooping you up bridal style to go to chopper, if you spill something on your dress he'll cover you up with his jacket, he'll clean anything you break with not a single complaint, he just adores every fibre of your being, even the wayward clumsy ones.
Usopp
Always thinks it's cute. And he really relates to the anxious feelings so he's just treats it like a normal situation, if anyone else saw it then he makes sure to tell them to not speak of it. He will also replace your clothes if you accidentally damage them :) like you wake up and your favourite skirt that you accidentally spilled ink all over and had to bin is now on your bed, brand new and sparkling. He also makes little inventions to help you out, both silly and serious, like a portable air bag that inflates with a button, a little robot that is essentially a roomba, little things like that.
Nami
Threatens everyone who saw it to never speak of it and then distracts you as much as possible until you stop thinking about it. Will cuddle you if you get really upset about it but she doesn't really understand why you would be embarrassed because she thinks everything you do is perfect. She does eventually learn when there's going to be a possible chance for an accident, she's predicting your clumsiness like the weather🫡 she stops what she can and tries to teach you how to avoid these situations :)
Prevents said embarrassing moment. Listen she's just so efficient and she spots problems before they happen so she's just secretly fixing stuff because she never wants you to feel bad. It's not until like months into your relationship and you're apart for some reason that theres like a series of unfortunate events that reminds you how clumsy you can be and realise what she's been doing. Lots of appreciation kisses after that for sure.
Robin
Franky
Honestly you never really feel embarrassed around him, he's just so easy going and he manages to make everything seem normal. If you trip or walk into something he just checks to see if you're okay, if you spill something on yourself or rip something he uses his shirt to cover you while you go and get changed. He really could not gaf as long as you still fancy him tbh. But if someone makes you feel bad then it's like that scene from the cat in the hat(he will make it look like an accident) :
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Brook
Concerned if you're hurt or if you get upset, but otherwise completely doesn't care. He just nonchalantly fixes the vase you broke, or helps you up from the floor and just pretends that he didn't watch you accidentally eat a fly. He really is just so in love with you and he still carries the manners of his youth so he refuses to contribute to your embarrassment in any way. But he loves an excuse to keep his hands on you, guiding you by the shoulders, holding your arm, carrying you around, he can't get enough of it.
Jinbei
Lovely beautiful man, he is always embarrassing himself but he's old enough to not care anymore and neither should you, if you fall over guaranteed it's because you're laughing at him just having slipped on deck. With Jinbei you become the type of couple where you bring each other down literally and up metaphorically, there can hardly be any embarrassment to you're sharing happiness all the time.
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literaryavenger · 1 year ago
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I love you and I hate it
Summary: Bucky's your best friend, but you're in love with him. Now that he has a girlfriend, will you be able to get a handle on your feelings?
Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader
Warnings: Bucky being a bit of an ass. Reader being dramatic. Angst. Language maybe. Minimal use of Y/N. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word Count: 2.7K
A/N: this is a two part because otherwise it was too long. Hope you like it! also, it's 4:30am and I can't help myself lol.
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Loving your best friend is not something anyone ever plans.
Getting those kinds of feelings for the person closest to you changes the way you look at them, the way you interact and essentially your relationship with them, making everything unnecessarily complicated.
At least that’s how you see it.
You definitely didn't think something like that could ever happen to you. But to be fair, you also never thought Bucky Barnes would ever become your best friend at the compound.
When you first arrived as the newest avengers recruit the brooding supersoldier was not your biggest fan. Things didn’t start on the best note for you two.
- 2 years ago -
Steve was showing you around the compound and introducing you to people and team members as you met them. You arrived at the common room where Bucky and Sam were watching Tv.
"Hey guys. This is Y/N, the new recruit I told you about," Steve introduced you "this is Sam." he said to you as Sam got up from the couch putting out his hand.
"Nice to meet you." he said.
"You too," you said, shaking his hand "it’s so exciting to be here and meet all of you. You are all such remarkable people."
"Oh, complimenting me? I like you already." Sam said chuckling.
"Of course you do." Steve said, rolling his eyes with a smile, then turned to you "and this is Bucky" he said, pointing at the brunette still sitting on the couch.
"Hi Bucky, it’s nice to meet you too." you said, getting closer to him and holding out your hand for him to shake. Bucky, however, just looked at you for a moment before standing up, turning away from you and walking out of the room without saying a word.
"Uh... did I do something wrong?" you asked, very much confused, still looking at the door Bucky just ran out of.
"No, it’s always him." said Sam.
"Sam, don’t." Steve told him, then turned to you again "don’t mind Bucky, he’s not good with new people. It’s nothing personal, he’ll get used to it, don’t worry."
"Right. He’ll get used to me." you said as he gave you an apologetic look "yeah… anyway, let’s finish the tour."
"Sure, bye Sam. See you around, I guess." you told Sam with a smile.
"Yeah, see you guys at dinner." and with that you left to finish the tour of the compound that ultimately ended with your assigned room.
"So this is your room, Natasha has the room on the right and Sam has the one on the left." he pointed at them as he talked and then pointed at the room across from yours "that's Bucky, to his right is Peter and mine is to his left."
"A lot of neighbors, got it."  you said chuckling with Steve.
"Yeah. So I’ll let you get settled and I’ll see you at dinner with the team." he said.
"Yeah, see you later." 
If you were honest with yourself, you were a little disappointed at how meeting Bucky went, you were really looking forward to meeting the super soldier.
While all the other girls were busy crushin on Captain America, you always felt more attracted to Sergeant Barnes.
Something about him just made you curious, and, after all the Winter Soldier stuff came to light, you were one of the few people that saw right away that Bucky was a victim.
You never did understand how people could read all the details of what happened to him and still call him a monster, like it was his fault that he was captured, tortured and made to do things no decent human being would ever do.
In fact, you got in trouble more than one time for fighting when things escalated while you were defending the super soldier from agents that didn’t see it like you.
It’s really a shame that a lot of agents of Shield itself thought so ill of the Sergeant. Maybe that’s why he didn’t like you, maybe he thought you were one of them.
You had to make sure he knew you weren’t.
Having made up your mind, you decided there was no better time like the present. You crossed the hall and knocked on his door, and after a few moments he opened.
"I know, Steve, don-" he interrupted himself the second he laid eyes on you.
"Sorry, not Steve. Clearly. I’m sorry to bother you, Sergeant Barnes, I just wanted to let you know that I don’t have anything against you. I know some agents feel like you should be held accountable for the things you were forced to do, and they’re not really afraid to get vocal about it, but I’m not one of them. I don’t think any of it was your fault. It may not matter much to you, after all you don’t seem to like me very much, but it’s important to me that you know this. You’re kind of my  hero." you finished, a little embarrassed at admitting this to his face. He looked at you for a few moments and, just as you thought he was about to slam the door in your face, he grinned.
"I’m your hero, doll?" he asked, leaning on the door frame with his arms crossed in a way that made his biceps look huge and a smirk on his face.
After that you and Bucky became quick friends, spending more and more time together. Missions, training, down time, you were practically attached at the hip.
You were always careful not to let any feelings grow other than friendship and, mostly, it was easy.
There were some times where you somehow ended up flirting, but they were fleeting moments that passed as quickly as they came, and you decided, for your own peace of mind, to not overthink them and let it go every time.
Now, back to the present, the reason why you’re lost in your thoughts and feelings for Bucky.
You’re watching from a distance as Bucky smiles and laughs, happier than you’ve ever seen him surrounded by his friends, more relaxed than he’s ever been during a party.
You smile at his happiness, glad that he’s finally comfortable around pretty much everybody, but your face falls pretty fast as you see him wrap his right arm around her.
You’ve known Sharon for a while now, she was one of the agents in the list for the spot in the Avengers before you got it. You always felt like she resented you for it, like she should’ve been the one to get it because she was already close with some of the members of the team.
She was never openly hostile with you, but you did notice her hanging around Bucky more and more in the last few months. You didn’t think anything of it, but you were proved wrong just half an hour ago when Bucky started to introduce her to the avengers she didn’t already know as his girlfriend.
As soon as that word came out of his mouth, so casually you’d think he'd been saying it his whole life,  you felt like you were gonna throw up.
It took all your skills to keep your face as neutral as possible, you felt like Sharon’s eyes were on you the whole time, trying to see every micro expression she could find to know what you were thinking.
But you were probably just imagining that, right?
You excused yourself as soon as you could and went straight to the bar to get the strongest drink Nat could make, which she handed to you with a knowing look while glancing behind you.
You barely had time to think before you felt his hand on your shoulder, feeling his body next to you but you didn't turn to look at him, taking a sip of your drink instead.
"Hey, doll, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Sharon before, it’s still pretty new."
You tried to keep your voice as cheery as you normally would around him. "Why would you? It’s your relationship, why are you apologizing?"
He gave you a weird look you'd never seen before, before saying "Because we’re best friends? We usually tell each other everything… right?" he sounded a bit uncertain.
"Yeah, right, duh." you said, trying to give a genuine laugh "Well, it’s alright anyway, now I know! Stop worrying, just go be with her."
He looked around your face for a few more moments, like he was looking for something, before he said "ok, then." and left.
You managed to keep the smile on your face until you were sure he was gone, but dropped it as soon as you looked back ahead of you.
Taking another sip of your drink and making a face at how much alcohol was actually in it, you looked at Nat and, nodding, you left before she could comment on the scene you’re sure she just watched in its entirety. 
So here you are now, in a corner watching people enjoy themselves, just like you used to do at parties with Bucky by your side, except you’re alone.
You try to look on the bright side, you really are, but you can find none.
You can't talk about it with anyone either since nobody knows about your feelings for the super soldier, except for Natasha who always seems to know everything, but  you aren't too close with her and neither of you ever actually spoke about it out loud.
Not that you would've, you aren't the most outgoing person, usually keeping your feelings and most of your thoughts to yourself, with the exception of Bucky.
With him talking seems like the easiest thing in the world, it doesn't matter about what. He knows almost everything that he could possibly know about you, the only thing that you could never bring yourself to talk about is your feelings for him.
You feel a hand in the low of your back and, just as you're bringing your fist up, you realize it's just Steve. "Easy there, tiger." he chuckled, lowering your arm for you. "You seem a little on edge. Everything okay?"
"Everything’s just fine, Captain. You can salute your way to someone else now." His laugh makes you smile against your will.
"Okay, rookie, you don’t wanna talk about it." you roll your eyes at the old nickname, but he keep going, "you know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you at a party without your moping buddy."
You glance at Bucky, who's busy laughing it up with Clint and Laura, his arm still around Sharon. Your eyes find Steve’s again, and you simply shrug. "We’re allowed to do our own thing, aren’t we?"
"Of course you are... I was just wondering why you weren’t with him, that’s all."
You avoid his eyes while you quietly say, "he already has someone at his side tonight, doesn’t need me there."
"What’s that supposed to mean?" comes a voice from behind you.
Damn. The one moment you weren’t looking at him and he sneaks up on you.
You turn around and see him standing there, arms crossed in front of his chest, Sharon at his side with a smug look on her face that you convince yourself you’re just imagining.
"What’s what supposed to mean?"  You try playing dumb, but you know Bucky can see right through that.
He raises an eyebrow at you expectantly but when you just shrug and give him your best confused look, he sighs and looks at Sharon. "Hey babe, can you get me a scotch from the bar? I’ll meet you there."
You don't know if you're more hurt at him calling her that or relieved at the fact that he didn’t use the nickname that was usually reserved for you.
She just nods and, without taking her eyes off of you, gives him a kiss on the lips. Okay, you definitely didn’t imagine that. As soon as she’s far enough, Bucky turns back to you.
"What’s wrong with you tonight?" He asks sharply.
"Excuse me? Who said there was something wrong with me?" You say defensively.
"Oh come on doll, you’ve been weird ever since Sharon got here. What’s the matter, do you not like her or something?"
You don't know what to say. You certainly aren't about to tell your best friend that the reason you don’t like his new girlfriend is because you have feelings for him. That’s not gonna end well for anybody. So you decide to just keep on denying.
"I don’t know what you’re talking about, Bucky, so why don’t you just go after you little girlfriend and enjoy your night with her."
"That, right there." he points at your face in a very accusatory manner. "What the fuck was that?"
"What was what?" you’re starting to raise your voice a little and swatting at his hand, getting annoyed at him for not letting this go.
"You’re being a jerk about Sharon, what is your problem with her?"
"I don’t have a problem with her!"
"Yes, you do!"
"Why are you trying to make this into a problem?!"
"Because I know you!" At this point you're both yelling.
"Well, clearly, you don’t know me as well as you think you do!" Lie.
"Why do you have to be so stubborn?! Just tell me what the hell is your problem!"
"Why do you care so much? Even if I had a problem, it’s my business, it’s not like I’m your girlfriend!" Bucky just looks at you with a face you’d never seen on him before and you can't decipher.
The whole room seems to go quiet as you two just look at each other for a few moments, then Bucky finally speaks.
"You’re right." he says, in a much quieter voice than a second before "you’re not my girlfriend. I just thought you were my friend. Guess I was wrong. I’ll go after my little girlfriend now."
You can't find it in you to say anything and, when you just look at him, he scoffs and turns around to make his way to the bar.
Slowly it feels like everyone else starts to go back to what they were doing before your yelling match stopped the party in its tracks, but you feel like you can't breath, let alone move, as you watch the spot where Bucky was standing just moments ago, tears starting to form in your eyes.
You can’t believe that just happened. Did Bucky really just say you aren’t his friend?
A hand on your shoulder brings you back to reality and you hear Steve saying "are you okay?" from next to you.
In all honesty, you forgot he was even there.
All that comes out of you is a broken sob before you turn around and make a run for the elevator, as fast as you can run in heels and a floor-length cocktail dress.
Steve runs after you, but there are too many people around that slow him down, and by the time he gets to the elevator the doors had just closed.
He waits to see where you would stop, assuming your shared floor but you never know. His eyebrows furrow in confusion and he pushes the button of the elevator, glad that he waited a second more.
When he gets to the roof it's so dark outside that it takes a second before he find you, and once he does he slowly gets close to you.
What he was not expecting was to find you sitting on the ground, hugging your knees and crying.
Steve sits down next to you and puts his arm around your shoulders wordlessly while you cry.
After you calmed down a bit he says "He’s really worried about you, Y/N. If there’s something going on, you should just tell him. He’ll understand…"
You think about it for a few minutes while you find a way to tell Steve what's going on.
"How do you tell someone that the reason you’re sad is because you love them?" you say with tears starting to form again in your eyes.
Steve can only stare at you, at a loss for words. 
You hear something behind you and when you turn you see Bucky’s back, walking towards the elevator.
It doesn’t matter how long he was there for, he obviously heard you.
You look back at Steve that has an apologetic look on his face, confirming your fear. Damn super soldier hearing.
Well, it looks like your friendship with Bucky is officially dead.
Part 2
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goatcheesecak3 · 7 months ago
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How about Adam x reader who were dating before the trap, maybe got into a fight, but Adam lives because that’s definitely what happened and they find each other.
Also ur NSFW hcs were good so feel free to sprinkle some spice if you see fit :)
Lost and found
Adam Faulkner-Stanheight x gn!reader
Fic type: angst, fluff
Warnings: missing person, medically induced coma
A/n: hello!! Thank you for your request, it was such a cute idea!! There's no nsfw because I couldn't find a way for it to fit into this story, but while we're on the topic I just wanna give a message to anyone who saw my Adam nsfw hcs!! I originally posted the unfinished version by accident, but I've gone back and added more to them since! So make sure you're all caught up on those, in my very biased opinion they're extremely canon teehee :^) all can be found in my masterlist as usual
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You and Adam had dated for two years before finally ending it about a month ago. The relationship was tumultuous to say the least, epic highs followed by epic lows. Being with Adam could be so wonderful at times, the way he kissed you like you were the only person in the world, the way he would have you folded in on yourself laughing. Your memory was filled with long nights spent talking and falling deeper and deeper in love. Adam was good with his words, which was a blessing and a curse- he could make your heart flutter just as easily as he could crush it. Arguments were frequent, and volatile, he always took things too far. Deciding that this was no way to live, with heavy hearts, the two of you called it quits.
You'd heard around from mutual acquaintances that he'd gotten into a pretty rough spot after the breakup, apparently he'd become some kind of stalker for hire? Like a private investigator but with absolutely no credentials or regard for his or anyone else's safety. It didn't exactly surprise you that he'd gone into a somewhat shady line of work, considering his lack of high school diploma there weren't really many options for him, you wished you could help, but you'd both agreed to keep your distance and move on.
One day however, you couldn't help but break the promise you'd made to yourself, and you asked about him. You'd run into his best friend, Scott at a video store, and despite all your restraint, the words tumbled out of your mouth:
"How's Adam been lately?"
"Pfft how should I know? I haven't spoken to that asshole since he totally bailed on my band photoshoot" Scott scoffed, rolling his eyes disinterestedly.
It wasn't like Adam to turn down paid work of any kind, so you decided to pry deeper,
"What do you mean? He just didn't show up?"
"Yeah, no call, no nothing. He hasn't spoken to anyone. Probably thinks he's too good for me and the guys now with his investigator bullshit, but lemme tell y-"
"Wait, he's actually doing that?! That's so dangerous, you don't think he's gotten himself into trouble do you?"
"I don't know, I got my own shit to worry about. Besides, no one bails on me and gets my sympathy. Scott Tibbs don't chase, baby." He said, all too loudly. You could practically see his ego bulging out of his head.
As you left the video store, the interaction played on your mind. After you and Adam had broken up, Scott was pretty much the only person in his life, and he didn't seem to give two hoots about Adam's wellbeing. Essentially, there wasn't a single person on earth who'd heard anything from Adam in the last week, and no one seemed to be trying to find him. You knew his family were estranged, and pretty much everyone else in his life were all acquaintances at best. If he was in trouble, it was up to you to help.
You headed to his apartment, just to see if he was home. Best case scenario he was, and you got some of your cds back, worst case.. well, you didn't wanna think about that.
You crept up the creaky mildewy staircase of his apartment complex until you reached his floor. Something in your gut felt wrong as you got closer to his door, something that you couldn't quite understand. It wasn't fear, it was overwhelming dread. You always thought there was a big difference between those two feelings; fear was wondering if something bad would happen, and dread was knowing in your heart that it would.
You knocked on his door and waited a beat. Nothing. For whatever reason, a voice in your head told you to try the door handle, and to your surprise, it was unlocked. Adam's apartment looked frozen in time, a half eaten bowl of mouldy noodles sat on his coffee table, an empty beer bottle next to it. Everything looked untouched. That was until your eyes made their way to the floor next to his closet- his camera. Smashed to pieces, and left strewn all over the floor. Your eyes darted up toward his redroom, which appeared to have been ransacked.
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck. You repeated over and over in your head like a mantra.
Your first thought was that someone he'd been stalking had caught him, followed him home to destroy any damning evidence, then deal with Adam.
Panic set in at this moment, as you rushed through his apartment, desperately hoping he was just passed out somewhere.
"Adam?! Adam?!" You cried out, to no avail.
Of course, the second you had regained enough composure to remember to do so, you called the police and filed a missing person's report. The next few days were filled with police interviews, cutting out and sticking the few pictures of Adam you had onto missing person's posters and plastering them all over the city. You handed them out to anyone who would take them, you gave them to all the venues and corner shops that Adam often went to, and you hounded the police relentlessly.
Sure, Adam was your ex, but my god how you had loved him, how you still loved him. You were the only person in his life who loved him, and you refused to give up.
After 6 never ending days, your phone rang. It was a call from the police.
"We've found a young man fitting Adam's description on the outskirts of the city. He's currently in the hospital in a medically induced coma while the staff tend to his injuries. As he is unable to identify himself at this time, we would greatly appreciate it if you could come down and identify him for us" the voice from the phone said.
This was like music to your ears, you tried not to get your hopes up, but you just knew it was him. It had to be, you could feel it in your heart.
As you stood by the bed of the man, you fell to your knees and wept. He was far skinner, his skin pale and almost translucent, his hair tangled and dirty- but there was no doubt about it, that was your Adam.
"That's him! That's my baby! Oh my god, that's my Adam!" You sobbed, clutching into the police office for support. He looked happy for you.
...
After a few days, Adam woke up. He was by no means in good shape, but he was alert, he was safe, and he was asking for you. He'd had to speak to police before he could have any visitors, but they'd assured him that you had done a great deal to help them find him, and he was touched.
"I thought I was gonna die in that room.."
"You probably would have, if y/n hadn't tried to find you"
"No one else reported me?"
The cop shook his head solemnly.
"Damn... I gotta see her, i- I gotta thank her,  i-"
He rambled like this for a while, until he was assured that you were able to come visit him.
...
"Hey, sugar" Adam smiled cockily, despite how weak he was.
You approached the chair next to his bed and reached down to stroke his face lovingly.
"That didn't sound very ex boyfriend of you" You teased.
"Aw come onnnn, I nearly die and you still don't want me back?" He whined, giving you a playful pout.
You chuckled and kissed his forehead,
"I basically saved your life, don't get greedy"
Adam's eyes narrowed, and he looked uncertain, "wait.. are you saying you actually don't wanna get back together?"
You rolled your eyes and pinched his cheek,
"Of course not dummy, I just like watching you squirm"
Adam mustered all of his strength to lift his arms and place his hands on your cheeks, pulling your face towards his.
"You're such a bitch" he mumbled against your lips with a smile
"You're a bitch" you giggled back.
The playful teasing went on for a while, until you were sat in a love filled silence, just holding eachother's hands. Adam was the first to break the silence.
"I'm a changed man, you know, y/n"
"Huh?"
"While I was in that room, you were all I could think about. I kept thinking about all the times I hurt you and I knew I needed to make it right. I made a vow to myself that i was gonna get out of there, and I was gonna get you back... and I was gonna love you the way you deserve to be loved. I'm gonna do that, y/n. I'm gonna prove I deserve to be with you, even if it takes a lifetime... which it probably will now that you basically saved my life"
"Yeah, it's gonna be pretty difficult to level that playing field" you smiled jokingly.
"I mean it, y/n," Adam said, his voice serious, "I promise I'm going to devote the rest of my life to loving you, it's the least I could do".
And several happy years later, he's kept that promise.
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stolasdearest · 10 months ago
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I saw that you didn't have any ideas for the 3rd prompt so maybeeee the moment Alastor makes a deal with the reader and he's all like "jeje all this power for the small price of my soul" and then the readers like "nu-uh that's not a small price actually, I'm gonna treat you horribly" and then it dawns on him that he literally sold his soul. :P
Or after the fight with Adam the reader like goes to rub it in Alastors face by helping him patch up and stuff after hearing him sing about him trying to find a way to get out of their deal.
Also manic Alastor giggles 💕✨💖
Whichever you want if you want, don't want you to feel pressured or stressed!
Also I am loving the Rosie and Alastor fics you've been writing they are amazing! 💖 You are definitely my fav hazbin writer ✨✨
As always, drink water and eat a snack!
✨ anon
Alastor x Overlord!Reader˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥
ׂׂૢ pairing : Alastor x Reader
ׂׂૢ cw: Not proofread, abuse of power, Reader being mean (in a loving (not really) way)
ׂׂૢ reader is gender neutral
𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .
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While quietly walking among the broken remains of the hotel your eyes scanned every piece of debris watching the dust settle from the violent, bloody fight you witnessed; stepping in Yellow glowing blood you paid no mind before your eyes slowly trailed to the trail of red blood; back to a very familiar spot that you knew all too well, with a shrug of your shoulders and a deep breath you, you made your way to the tower; the blood of your dearest soul sticking to the sole of your shoe.
Arriving at the shattered and battered radio tower, you easily hoisted yourself up into it; not making the slightest effort at keeping your presence unknown to Alastor who was hunched over his control panel; rigid, shallow fast breaths while his chest heaved; you smugly watched his ears flatten further upon his realization of who had found him, his gaze shifting to meet yours after a few seconds his body too, turning to you; revealing that nasty gash on his chest his eyes seemed heavy, his smile strained; wince and pained expressions contorting as you tutted at the Overlord while walking up to him; gently undoing the layers to get to the gash, his hand raised; hesitating to stop you his hand quickly retreating back to the control panel with one sharp glare from you.
"you should be more careful. Look at you, I thought I didn't need to see you this truly pathetic again"
Your words cut through him as his eyes averted every inch of you; shame, embarrassment and humiliation washing over his weakened body before he leaned more into the control panel, his sharp nails digging further into the metal surface at the next venom laced words coming out your mouth
"oh. So because you're hurt means you no longer answer me, Alastor?"
"no,no you're right I'm sorry, I should've been more careful"
The sweat dripping from his forehead while one of his eyes lingered on you watching you meticulously work on his fresh wound, your face didn't match your hands gentleness however; your eyes filled with annoyance and hints of just pure anger; you had better things to do then take care of his pathetic self; he had felt your tug when he was hit, essentially further convincing him to get the fuck out of there; the second he was away he knew he'd never hear the end of it from you; and now his flattened ears are listening those very said words.
"I thought you were a powerful overlord, you honestly thought this would've been a good idea? It seemed I underestimated you"
Every new word, every new insult and comment made him wince again and again while glancing at you looking for perhaps a sign you'd soon let up with your entourage of sickly words, not helped by the sly smug smirk very abhorrent smirk on your face, Alastors eyes met yours; seeing a glint in your orbs, God how he hated being infront of you it always felt so overwhelmingly humiliation under your precise watch.
"you can be glad I saved you last minute, honestly why do I need to save you every time, The leader of the exorcists; did you think he'd be an easy fight? Or did you go into that fight wanting to embarrass me?"
The silence in the broken radio tower was thick and deafening, Alastor shallowed the lump in his throat and opened his mouth, trying to look at you, looking for even the slightest bit of worry in your eyes, trying to find even a sliver of you that actually cares about him, quickly snapping back when he felt a rough hand grab his jaw and pulling to kneel over while his body tensed at the pain shooting through his body
"answer me, before you lose that tongue of yours."
His breathing quickened and his clawed hand gently came to hold your wrist, seeing him fighting to regain his composure.
"i— I don't know what I was thinking, that was stupid of me..I apologize"
"hm. So you can listen. Pull yourself together"
You let go of his jaw, clearing your throat and stepping away from him; turning your back to the Overlord and leaving through the hatch you come through; leaving Alastor stood there with a gentler hand replacing the one you had, the other one hovering over the cleaned and patched up wound.
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Author's note : man...I GOT A LIL LAZY AT THR END....I KINDA HATE THISSS
Taglist : @k1y0yo @ihavetoomanyfictionalcrushes @d0nutsaur @anni1600
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just-a-little-cellist · 2 months ago
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Hello! Could I have a head canon or drabble (which ever you feel more inspired to do/makes sense) for Sandor x Stark!fem!reader for what things might have been like if she’d gone with him when he was leaving during the Battle of the Blackwater? Thank you friend, I appreciate it! 💛🙏
(yes of course! I feel like both work so this is headcanons plus a bonus drabble x I love Sandor so always got to do the most for him! enjoy!)
(also it's been forever since I watched this show so this is definitely not accurate events for the Battle of Blackwater episode lol)
(Sandor Clegane x fem Stark reader - warnings for typical Game of Thrones stuff, slight angst but mostly fluff)
King's Landing had always been dangerous, especially for people like you and Sandor. You knew it better than anyone after the things your family had gone through at the hands of the king.
Sandor had also tasted the cruelty that Joffrey was capable of, and neither of you were keen to exacerbate it.
Which is why you'd spent months dancing around feelings for each other.
You were lucky that Joffrey had set his sights on Sansa rather than yourself, but as a Stark it was too much of a risk to openly court Sandor. No matter how badly you wanted to.
You also wouldn't dare risk causing him harm in that way. You knew any associates of yours would sooner or later be targeted by the Lannisters.
Sandor was usually your escort in the Red Keep. No doubt the king found it amusing to have his dog guarding the wolf. He was quiet and brooding, but seemed to enjoy your presence at least a little, though you couldn't be sure whether you had imagined the tension between you. Aside from that, you weren't certain of his feelings until the Battle of the Blackwater.
You were far too stubborn to allow yourself to be corralled into a safehold with the women and children.
Fortunately, Cersei didn't much care about your fate should you be caught in the consequences of the battle, so you remained in your room in the keep.
Truthfully, you were waiting for Sandor. You didn't know whether he would return or not, but you couldn't sit around and do nothing while he fought.
You busied yourself with gathering your essential belongings, in case of needing to flee in an emergency, until a blaze lit up the horizon through your window.
You just prayed that he was alright...
Your nervous pacing was enough to occupy yourself until you heard thundering footsteps from the hall. Fuck. You had no way to defend yourself if someone should come to take you, and it was far too late to hide now, and-
The door burst open.
And it was him.
He looked a little worse for wear, but mostly unharmed, and you practically threw yourself at him knowing he was alive.
Not quite registering how he froze up in surprise for a moment, you wrapped your arms around him tightly, just needing to feel him there despite the armour that stood between you. His hand moved to your shoulder as you pulled away, much gentler than you'd expected him to be.
"I'm leaving."
Your heart dropped.
"...Oh."
You blinked back the tears that were threatening to form and swallowed your pain as best you could. "Where will you go?"
"Anywhere. Anywhere's better than this fuckin' city."
You nodded and looked down, not knowing what else to say without betraying your feelings.
"Little wolf." His fingers hooked under your chin to make you look up at him, with eyes clouded by tears. "You'd miss an old dog that much?"
Your voice seemed to shrink as a tear rolled down your cheek. "I just... I don't want you to go..."
Sandor brushed it away with his thumb and smiled, almost imperceptibly, but it was there. "Do you really think I'd leave you to the lions? You're coming with me."
In that moment, Sandor felt he could live in the way your eyes brightened.
"You really mean that?"
"Get your things. I'm not staying here long enough for them to find us."
You grabbed your bag of essentials that was already lying on your bed, breathing out a laugh and shrugging when Sandor raised an eyebrow at your preparedness.
"Maybe I was hoping you'd come back for me."
"Always will, little wolf."
The gentle feeling of your lips against his cheek sent warmth through his body, and Sandor was determined to not let you out of his sight again if this was the reward.
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glitter-stained · 4 months ago
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My very personal rating of every lazarus pit fanon side effects I've ever read, ranked from favourite to least favourite :
Tapetum lucidum (the thing cats have that makes their eyes gleam in the dark): that's so creepy and cool, eery in a more discreet way than a full-on glow, idk who hced that first but they are a genius
Contaminated blood laced with the lazarus protein: because our blood renews itself pretty often, this implies the existence of either a lazarus organ that continues to pump the lazarus protein in the blood, or, more probably, the contamination of one of the blood producing organs, maybe of the bone marrow, by the Lazarus pit. Like imagine the Lazarus Pit changing you down to the inside of your bone... The implications are so fascinating I'd love to read more about it.
Altered dna: this doesn't make sense, how does the magical healing pit change your dna, I love it so much, tell me more about the magic gatorade that rewrites dna
Accelerated healing/enhancements: what's funnier, that the pit gave Jason metahuman abilities like being able to withstand a meteorite and going toe-to-toe with Deathstroke (the wiki's words, not mine) and it was just never discussed, or that nothing Jason went through gave him these abilities that he really shouldn't have and he still does and it was just never discussed? I don't know but still, that stuff is top-tier
Glowing green eyes: on the one hand, eyes that glow when the person is feeling intense negative emotions (even better it's not just rage, like, imagine having a flashback or nightmare or getting fear toxined and their eyes glow and people think they're about to attack but they just scream that'd be so cool) but on the other hand, I feel like the colour is too limiting. Sure, Ra's or Riddler can fuck with the glowing green but come on, my girl Cass deserves eyes that glow gold (like the gold from the Batgirl suit). Jason deserves to have glowing red eyes. Cicero says that eyes are the reflection of the soul and while I love the idea of the lazarus pit being toxic, contaminating a part of the person's soul, in comics, a character's colour scheme is an essential part of their graphic identity, and I think altering it to the point of giving it a totally different colour is too much for my taste personally. Like, you are still the same person that you were before the bad thing happened. Yes, it changed you irrevocably, but you are still yourself and you should still have the right to your name and to the colour of your soul.
Lazarus Rage/Pit Madness: so I've seen this one criticized pretty often, often because of how unnecessary, and honestly probably damaging, to the understanding of Jason's character after his resurrection. And like, I agree, but also I've found myself to enjoy the fanon version of the Batfam. Like, I don't like that it's murky and confusing sometimes to figure out which is fanon or canon and that that leads people to judging canon actions from a standard of fanon information, and parts of it can be sexist or racist or classist, but the same can be said from canon, you have to be critical with what you consume. Basically to me there are two batfams and I consume both differently and enjoy both, and in the context of fanon I enjoy Pit Madness. The idea of uncontrollable, alien rage is fun, is angsty, and as someone with intense anger issues I'm telling you writing a lazarus rage episode was one of the most cathartic things I've ever written and it felt so good. I also think part of the upset on the subject is a bit undeserved because I see people complain that "the lazarus doesn't work like that because it didn't do that to other people" as if the way the lazarus pit worked made any sense. You're telling me this stuff healed Jason's malnutrition but it didn't fix his trauma? That it healed the Riddler's brain cancer but couldn't be bothered to fuck with Jason's hypertrophied amygdala and the fucked up connections between his amygdala and hippocampus??! Obviously we can't expect dc to know or care about science that much , but I still have the right to be nerdy about it. Jason went into the pit resurrected by God and with brain damage and Ra's said it was a plague and that could make him crazy, I fully believe he could have gotten Pit Madness even if the others hadn't.
Eye-colour change: that's the same thing as the glowing part but without the fun part, really dislike it. I need to be able to listen to I know these eyes/this man is dead from the Count of MonteCristo Musical while making up Under the Red Hood edits in my head please and thank you
Lazarus Pit brings people back to life: I hate it so much dc stop treating life and death so inconsequentially oh my gosh characters fighting life and death situations should not have a source of immortality right in hand I hate that lazarus resin lazarus toxin stuff they have right now and the idea that the pits can bring back to life plays into that idea so I really dislike it. I understand the appeal, it's the basics of coming back wrong with a side of rebirth in the water but instead of being purified it's being poisoned, but I just can't get over how frustrating it is to see a beloved character die and only be able to say I hope he doesn't come back for his own sake and then he comes back. Urgh.
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deathbxnny · 10 months ago
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hihi, may I request platonic wriothesley hcs with a teen!reader who is the youngest inmate? >:3
Hello there! I absolutely love this idea and am so excited to write it, hehe! I hope you'll like this, Anon!<33
Content: Platonic mentor/student dynamic, fluff, teen reader, some mentions of violence, Reader is troubled, sfw
Reader has no mentioned pronouns!
((Not fully proofread))
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Wriothesley couldn't help but raise a brow, when he saw your sentencing for the first time on paper. You were the typical troubled teen, one that caused ruckus and didn't know how to control their anger due to your life spent out on the ruthless streets. But different than most, you had actually gotten yourself into the fortress, despite your young age. Not that it really matters to the court, he figured.
He took it upon himself to greet you first, mainly because he felt like that was safer. He expected some pushback or anger, but instead was met by calm irritation on your part. Other than that, you simply accepted your fate, grimly noting that you've been through worse. The older man just nods, although he oddly feels a soft spot for you, forming rather quickly. Perhaps you remind him too much of himself.
Being the youngest inmate quickly made you rather... popular among the other prisoners, something that ofcourse reached Wriothesley's ears first, who then promptly made sure you worked right under him to keep you safe. He wanted to help you out, perhaps rehabilitate you well enough, that the court perhaps sees how harsh it was and allows you to go free again.
He is patient and makes sure you know that you can open up to him at any time. He eventually jokingly calls himself your mentor, but you know better than to think it was just a simple comment. Because over time, that actually became true. Whether you liked it or not.
To deal with your frustrations and troubles, he decides that a more "healthier" way to let everything out is by training with you in the boxing ring. He teaches you how to fight, how to defend yourself. It comes in handy down here. And at the end of each lesson, he gets you a couple snacks as a reward for doing well, no matter if you actually did or not.
Drinking tea with him often is a daily thing eventually as well. It helps you open up to him and his jokes also start making you laugh from time to time. He also takes the time to inquire if someone or something is bothering you when you seem down. And if he finds out that someone has been hurting or bullying you? Well, perhaps he should reassert his title as a Duke to the troublemakers.
You're also forced to partake in weekly checkups with Sigewinne to make sure that you're physically as healthy as you can be, considering your young age. Wriothesley sees it as essentially and skillfully evades your whining and complaining by promising you more of your favorite snacks. It always works, much to your dismay.
You're always seen standing behind or next to the Duke whenever he's welcoming important guests into the Fortress. And whenever anyone asks who you are, he simply grins and places a hand on your head, before introducing you as his favorite little "right hand henchman". He chuckles at the annoyed roll of your eyes, but doesn't miss the content ghost of a smile on your lips from the corner of his eye.
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Alright, I really hope this was fine, Anon! And congrats for being my first request of this year! I haven't written anything in a while and therefore hope I'm not too rusty... but either way, requests are currently open and am excited for the next one's! <33
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mentallyisekaid · 1 year ago
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「 ✦ Fatui Harbingers x La Signora's Sister! Reader, PART 2 ✦ 」
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Part 1 [Part 2] Part 2.5 Part 3 Part 3.5
It's highly recommended to read the parts in order, otherwise few things will make sense!
Author's note ~ From this chapter forward, Y/N will develop a strong, somewhat intimate bond with her fellow Harbingers, but it's still, essentially, platonic. After coming up with the full storyline for this series, I figured it'd best to keep romance to a minimum, so it won't distract me or the readers from what's happening plotwise. But make no mistake - all of them care quite fiercely about you... it's not labelled "Harbingers x Reader" for nothing :) And of course, you're free to interpret their relationship in any kind of way you prefer <3
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Featured in this chapter, we have (drum roll, if you please)... Scaramouche, Childe and Columbina!
Warnings: brief/indirect spoilers regarding Sumeru's Archon quest and Scaramouche's lore
Word count: 3k
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A month had passed since the funeral, and the day you'd become the 12th of the Fatui Harbingers at Pierro's request.
*Note ~ Even though Signora's dead, I still consider her to be one of the 'Eleven Harbingers', and thus Y/N's position will be the 12th!
Truth to be told, you hardly cared whether such a dubious position had been offered to you out of respect for Rosalyne's legacy, or merely because they'd wanted to keep an eye on the immortal girl who possessed two Visions.
For the past five centuries, your life had lacked any clear purpose - perhaps this new title could change things to something a bit more... colorful?
Perhaps they could be the change.
On that note, there was something quite peculiar you'd come to notice about the infamous Harbingers.
Despite joining their ranks, you had kept the reason behind your questionable situation as a secret, so on a very essential level they still knew next to nothing about you (except for the Director who definitely knew enough to make you very uncomfortable!) In this regard, shouldn't they have considered you a stranger, or at least a high security risk?
Yes, yes they should have.
Yet not only did they treat you as one of their own, but it appeared that for some reason, these people cared about you to an extent beyond just professional relationships, always looking out for you in weird ways, like making sure you didn't overwork yourself, stayed healthy and never lacked any weird luxuries like expensive bath salts - that, and the fact that they were almost constantly lingering around you...
As someone who'd grown used to getting by on their own, you didn't really know what to make of their behavior. Or how to return it.
But did you dislike it? Not really. Why? Well, you were still sort of figuring that out.
You were currently sitting in Pantalone's office, looking through some financial reports while the Regrator himself was away on a business trip. As things stood, this was pretty much all that your title as a Harbinger was good for - assisting your colleagues by handling the less direct approaches to their duties as diplomats of Snezhnaya. It was only natural that you weren't yet expected, or trusted, to do any actual fieldwork.
So, your days were mostly spent being surrounded by endless piles of documents...
*knock, knock!*
...and them, as you might have guessed.
You sighed, placing the papers down on the desk when another round of impatient knocks came in. Clearly, that someone was going to invite themselves in regardless of your answer, and it wasn't hard to narrow down the list of possible suspects since only the highest ranking members of the Fatui were allowed in this part of the headquarters - frankly, the doors here tended not to be Harbinger-proof?
But it's not as if you really minded, breaktime was due anyway. Also, their company was always vastly more entertaining than work!
"It's not locked, you know" you commented, leaning back on your chair.
A scoff was heard before the door was rudely pushed open, and an unfamiliar character marched with such arrogance you'd think they owned the place. This made you raise an eyebrow; what an admirable sense of superiority? It wasn't someone you'd met before, but judging from the way they carried themselves, you recognized them nonetheless.
The man with child-like features (and a rather beautiful face) stopped in the middle of the room, staring curiously, though somewhat condescendingly, at the girl behind the desk.
"Are you," he started, "perchance the Director's newest recruit?"
"It's already been a month, but I suppose... in any case, what can I do for you, mister?"
"Mister?" The Harbinger crossed his arms, both amused and irked by your way of addressing him. "Ha, do you not know who I am?"
"Oh, no, I'm fairly certain I do," you sighed. "A presumptuous attitude, and a strikingly non-traditional kasa hat... the Balladeer, I presume? I heard you were busy playing a god in Sumeru with one of Dottore's segments, so I thought it might be a while before I get to meet the last one of my colleagues. But here you are - Scaramouche, was it? To what do I owe the pleasure?"
He was being rude too, you were just returning the discourtesy.
Scaramouche held back a chuckle, the bells from his hat jingling.
"Ah, yes, that would be me. And as to why I bothered coming all the way from Sumeru just to meet you, miss Twelfth..."
"I have a name. It's Y/N."
He clicked his tongue, taking a step closer.
"Yes, yes, whatever. Now, sit there and listen. I was in the middle of my little experiment on blasphemy when I suddenly heard that the Jester had recruited a new Harbinger, who, incidentally, has two Visions and is supposedly immortal - but she blatantly refuses to reveal anything about herself. Surely, you can imagine my slight annoyance at this, seeing as you, on the other hand, seem to know an awful lot about us."
You smiled a bit, fiddling with the quill pen in your hand.
"Yes, I don't exactly go around advertising my past to others. But aren't you same in that regard, Scaramouche?"
"I won't amuse you by answering that." He smiled eerily. "The point is, I don't like being kept in the dark - it gives people the chance to stab me in the back, and that's not something I'm particularly fond of."
"Ask the Director, then. I can assure you he knows all kinds of scandalous things about me - about all of us, no doubt."
He shrugged. "That won't be necessary."
In the blink of an eye, Scaramouche was no longer where he'd been standing before. The Sixth Harbinger had suddenly jumped on top of your desk, scattering the paperwork you'd spent hours organizing. He leaned forward with a smug look on his face, grabbing your chin between his delicate fingers.
"So, our little miss Harbinger refuses to reveal her secrets? We'll get those out of you, don't you worry~"
"My goodness?" Your previously dull eyes sparkled a bit. "What a bold move - it's certainly... something. I must say, I find your character quite fascinating, Balladeer."
"Likewise."
Behind that ruthless, indigo gaze, was a forlorn soul that had faced so much injustice...
When travelling around Teyvat for the past centuries, you'd caught bits and pieces of hearsay about Scaramouche's tragic past - most of it probably accurate. But it wouldn't have been wise to bring up such matters when you'd only just met him, especially since the Balladeer was widely known for his foul temper.
Though, judging from the way was looking at you, he probably knew what you were thinking. Even so, there was no ill intent in his eyes.
A new voice suddenly interrupted your odd encounter.
"I hope you're not harrassing our princess, dearest Scara!"
Tartaglia waltzed in to the office with an ominous smile. Scaramouche jumped down from your desk, scoffing at the sight of his ginger colleague.
"Ha, barely! I just happen to find her very intriguing."
Childe laughed a bit, stepping forward to pat your head.
"Well, I did tell you she was special, comrade. And to think you didn't believe me? Yet, here I find you. It seems Y/N Lohefalter is capable of drawing the attention of even the Balladeer himself, ahahhah~"
You followed their interaction, thoroughly entertained - compared to your previous uneventful life, this was certainly refreshing.
"Foolish boys," yet another familiar voice was heard, and Columbina strode in gracefully. "Avoiding your work to disturb Y/N with these shameful antics? Pierro would be quite displeased. Now, perish."
Damselette then turned her attention on you, smiling sweetly.
"Would you like to have an afternoon snack with me? I hope you've been eating enough, my dove."
"Now, now, don't be greedy..." Scaramouche taunted. "It's rather obvious that she and I were having a conversation."
You smiled a bit, pointing at each one of them with your pen.
"Technically, you're all are here equally uninvited. And on that note - as much as I'd rather do anything else right now - I really should continue with these documents or they're going to pile up..."
"Hey now, you know Pantalone doesn't like it when you overwork yourself, Y/N," Childe pointed out, crossing his arms.
Columbina smiled gently. "Yes, how about we go and have some tea instead?~"
Scaramouche raised an eyebrow at this.
"You sure speak to this girl in an unprofessional manner, Tartaglia, Damselette - if I didn't know better, I'd say it sounds almost intimate. Trying to snatch her away from me, perhaps? But you've already known her for a month; it ought to be my turn to get acquainted with our new little Harbinger. Y/N and I have some things to discuss, after all..."
"Oh?" Childe raised an eyebrow. "Then what exactly were you and her chatting so intimately about before I came?"
"Enlighten us, Balladeer," Columbina chuckled.
You shook your head a bit.
"Let's not go down that rabbit hole-"
"No." Scaramouche cut you off with a smug expression. "These two, and the rest of them... would agree with the opinion I shared with you, don't you think? Surely it's something that we've all been wondering about."
Columbina and Childe shared a brief but knowing look - it wasn't hard to guess what the Balladeer had said to you, and though he should have gone about it a more discreet manner, they couldn't deny their curiosity either.
The angel-like Harbinger walked next to you, brushing back a loose strand of hair from your face.
"I'd rather hear this from you," she hummed.
Her touch was a little cold but gentle, not at all unpleasant. You just weren't used to this kind of physical intimacy, or rather, it had been so long since you'd experienced any kind of intimacy, that it caught you a bit off-guard whenever your co-workers offered these weird gestures. It's not like you... really minded this. But it did make it hard to refuse when they the asked you for something.
You sighed, leaning back on the chair.
"Of course, I... know you're all somewhat displeased that I'm keeping these secrets from you, about my past, that is - how I've lived for this long, and how it's possible that have two Visions. It might be difficult for you to trust me because of this, but even so, I am not obliged to reveal anything. And you know as well as I do that the Jester already knows what there is to be known; he wouldn't have let me join otherwise."
Scaramouche narrowed his eyes, not content with your answer.
"Yes, but I also know that the Director is a man of his principles - either those secrets are shared of your own accord, or not at all."
"Then maybe you don't need to know? Maybe you're better off not knowing?"
Tartaglia frowned, leaning against the wall next you.
"Being a part of the Fatui already means that we're in way over our heads when it comes to anything questionable that's going on in Teyvat. Your... situation, is included in that, even more so because you're one of us now. And in case it's not clear yet, we do care about our own, even if that often gets a bit lost behind our agendas and differences." He put a hand on your shoulder and offered a reassuring smile. "So, we'd like to know more about you, Y/N. I'm sure that's what Scaramouche has been trying to tell you too, albeit he has a weird way of choosing his words."
The Balladeer crossed his arms. "What a speech, Childe." It sounded like a snide remark, you somehow sensed that he didn't mean it as one.
"For once, I agree with these two," Columbina said. "Though both are going about this in a rather thoughtless manner. Regardless of her past and whether or not she chooses to disclose it, she is a Harbinger - and that does not necessarily mean we should know all these things about her. Her only responsibility is to serve the Tsaritsa, after all."
She smiled at you. "But it is a shame you don't seem to trust us very much, Y/N."
Reverse psychology? Smooth.
"I think you've misunderstood me, though. It's not about trust."
You stood up from Pantalone's fancy office chair, stretching a bit.
"At this point, revealing those things might or might not cost me, but I'm pretty sure I won't gain anything from it either. If that's the case - well, is survival not about keeping the trump cards you have, or at least not giving them away for free? And information is often more valuable than Mora."
"You sound like the Regrator, though I'm sure he would disagree about the Mora part." Tartaglia chuckled. "But I like the way you think! So, what is it that you'd like in return for those secrets?"
"I'd be happy to arrange whatever it is~" Columbina singsonged. "Within the bounds of good taste, of course."
Scaramouche clicked his tongue. "What an insufferable girl - what is it you want, then?"
You tilted your head, wondering why these people were so invested in you. One day, you'd surely understand... but in this moment, you could only think about their offer and how it was just slightly too tempting to refuse.
"Well, right now, I'm craving for some excitement. Something more thrilling than this paperwork I'm drowning in day after day. I don't suppose one of you has a solution for that?"
Columbina's soft laughter jingled in the air.
Scaramouche was glaring at you.
Childe's eyes were sparkling.
"Excitement, you say?!" the ginger exclaimed. "Oh, that won't be a problem. How about we make a little bet, Y/N?"
"I'm listening."
"Let's fight a bit~ I've been wanting to see what you're capable of, and a match against the Eleventh Harbinger is far from playing around, so I'm sure it would prove exciting enough for you." He nodded toward the two gemstones hanging from your belt. "Use those Visions, any weapons and all the shenanigans you can possibly come up with - if you think you can. I promise to make it worth your while. Naturally, you'd have to share some of your past in exchange..."
You raised an eyebrow at his suggestion. "...if you manage to win, that is?"
Columbina chuckled. "Careful, Y/N. You'll get Tartaglia too excited~"
Scaramouche rolled his eyes.
"I'm not sure you understand what you're agreeing to, miss Twelfth. But by all means, go play with this idiot - I'll gladly come and watch, it ought to be entertaining. The next phase of my mission in Sumeru is not due in a while anyway." (And if by some miracle you do manage to beat Childe, I'll come up with other ways of discovering those secrets.)
The Balladeer as well had grown quite captivated by you.
Childe smiled innocently. "How about it, Y/N? Are you in?"
"You bet."
---
...who in their right mind had recruited this maniac?
Sure, the Harbingers had inhuman abilities, but this was pure madness. Tartaglia had yet to even demonstrate his Hydro powers, much less a Delusion, but merely by using his agility and a pair of escrima sticks he had already brought you to your knees.
It's not as if you considered yourself to be a particularly skilled fighter, but you did have five centuries' worth more experience than him, and quite a few tricks up in your sleeve. But Childe only ever gave you the time to use your polearm - no Visions, no shenanigans - and even so, you didn't manage to land a single hit on him.
You lay on the floor of the training grounds, breathlessly gazing up at Tartaglia who was pinning you down with his knee.
"Ready to yield, girlie?"
"Ha... I'm not, *huff*, giving up that easily..."
He smiled, putting a bit more pressure on your chest - not in a painful way, but it was still enough to diminish your remaining fighting spirit rather quickly.
"Alright, alright, fine... please, *huff*... stop, Tartaglia... I, *huff*... give... up..."
"You can call me Ajax, by the way."
The ginger stood up, gazing down at you with a grin on his face. Well, at least now you knew that the rumors about his martial arts prowess weren't exaggerated? Neither was the fact that whenever he did fight, there was this euphoric (honestly a bit scary) aura around him. Reminder - think twice before you accept a challenge from this guy in the future!
That said, you had quite enjoyed yourself...
Ajax offered his hand to you, and you meekly took it, allowing him to pull you up from the ground.
Columbina and Scaramouche, who had been silently observing from the sidelines, appeared slightly amused and certainly pleased by the end of your struggle. This outcome had been more or less expected, but ever so welcome. A Harbinger never backed on their word, after all~
"Now then, my angel..."
"...you better keep that promise."
The three of them led you to a small lounge, dimly lit by a fireplace and deserted from any members of Fatui. Exhausted, you slouched down on a couch and closed your eyes.
Damselette came next to you wordlessly, laying down and letting her head rest on your lap. This was a habit of hers that you didn't mind; while admittedly rather intimate, it was something like this that you had long yearned for.
Childe leaned against a nearby wall, smiling at you encouragingly. For some reason, you always felt at ease around him. He was like an "older" sibling - more than she ever was, the one you'd already lost before her death.
The Balladeer was sitting on an armchair, observing you with an unreadable expression. The slight softness in those cold eyes was perhaps only noticed by you; an abandoned soul recognizes its own kind.
"Now then, Ajax, Scaramouche and Columbina. Allow me to tell you a story - one that discloses how my first Vision came to be. While I'm at it, I suppose I might as well reveal why Rosalyne and I shared such a difficult relationship..."
(to be continued)
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