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deadly-diminuendo · 2 days ago
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A Fitting Reunion
a tailor (spawn) astarion x fem!tav reader fic | nsfw | ~13.7k words
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(dividers by @saradika-graphics)
Summary: After a rather embarrassing experience at the reunion party, you have been nervous to see Astarion again. You manage to gather the courage to visit his tailoring shop for dress alterations—and to be a better friend to him. And maybe there is just a little part of you that still hopes for something more. But he couldn’t possibly want that—or could he?
Tags/CW: anxiety, piv sex, oral sex (both ways), post-game, fluff/smut/mutual pining
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Breathe. 
Inhale. Hold. Exhale. Again. Then again. And again.
You can do this.
He is your friend.
A friend you used to sleep with.
A friend you never stop thinking about.
Ever.
Hells.
You have not seen Astarion since Withers’ party. The one where you drunkenly suggested you would not mind taking a stroll together back into the woods where the two of you once used to go. You could still remember the way.
You might have phrased things a little less delicately at the time.
And of course he said no.
“Darling, flattered as I am, I think it’s best we get you to bed. Your own bed, to be clear.”
A more gentle rejection from him than you perhaps deserved. What must he have thought of you? Coming on to him like that when you knew a night of passion was probably the last thing on his mind? You are supposed to care about him, not treat him like a piece of meat.
Not that you ever thought of him that way—but still you worry how it seems.
Fuzzy though the details are, you remember enough to know Astarion was the one to ensure your safe journey home that night. The one to step through the portal with you, to help you up the stairs, to tuck you under the covers. And how did you repay him?
You made yourself a stranger.
You should have gone to see him sooner. Apologized. Been a real friend.
Granted the party happened only a month ago. A month is not too long a wait, is it? People live busy lives. Some of your friends you only see a few times a year.
Or maybe it has not been long enough. Maybe you are making too big a deal of this, and you will only be making an even greater fool of yourself by doing this now.
The garment bag draped over your arms feels heavier and heavier. Maybe a purely social call would have been a wiser choice than this transactional one. On the other hand, you do want to show your support for his new business venture. Any friend would do that, right?
Breathe, you remind yourself. Just breathe.
You repeat your exercises as you try to calm your rapid heartrate. A near impossible task knowing he will be able to hear it the second you walk through that door. Gods, your heart is hammering so hard that you worry he might already hear it through the walls. Curse his vampiric senses.
You can still turn back around. Come back another time. When you are ready.
Who are you kidding?
You will never be ready.
But, if the choice is between now or never—between the shame of showing your face or the pain of never seeing his again—you know what you have to do.
Swallowing your pride, you manage to free a hand enough to turn the handle, lean against the door, and push.
The bell rings.
Its shrill announcement of your arrival sends you spiralling. You think of running. Hiding. Just dropping to the ground and crying.
But there will be no escape because the second you hear that achingly familiar voice sing out the word, “Coming,” your feet are frozen to the floor.
Then comes the inevitable moment, when you see him and he sees you, and you look away, and you look back, and you try not to avert your gaze, and you try not to stare, and gods help you through this for his beauty stuns you still.
He briefly mirrors your silent stupor before you see the crinkle of his eyes and the crook of his charming smile. “Hello, darling.”
Frantically you ask yourself what this means. You sift through every detail you know about the man before you as you try to deduce the thoughts running through his mind. Whether he is truly happy to see you or if he only pretends to be. Whether this is his real face or once more the mask.
You have imagined this scene a million times, practiced every possible variation of it in your head, but when you try to think what to say your mind runs blank. You settle for a few words that are simple and true. “It is good to see you, Astarion.”
“And same to you, my friend,” he says, and you manage a small smile. Are you really worthy of being called his friend after all this time apart? Is an honest-to-goodness friendship even possible between the two of you?
You do not speak so he continues. “And might I add that you are looking more delicious than ever.”
Oh. He is flirting with you. Falling back on old habits, perhaps. Or maybe he seeks to lighten the mood, to ease you into a conversation that clearly makes you feel awkward. Nothing more. Still your heart flutters as it always used to back in those early days. 
Back when you were foolish enough to believe he might be your forever.
“I was hoping you could help me,” you tell him, trying to get yourself back on track. “I have a gown that needs alterations. I take it you have heard about the upcoming Ravengard ball?”
“Oh, yes,” he says, reaching out to take the garment bag from you, and though you are glad to be free of its weight, you are not quite sure what to do with your hands. “I have been invited myself, but honestly, I expect the whole affair to be dreadfully boring. I suppose I could always introduce a little chaos into the mix myself, but…” He shrugs. “I’ll likely just skip it.”
“You’re not going? Not even for Wyll?”
Not even for me? That third question burns in your mind but you dare not ask it.
“We were not exactly the best of friends if you’ll recall.”
That is true. You remember many a tense exchange between them—Wyll needlessly cruel at times, Astarion spitting back with an understandable but equally vicious venom—no real surprise that the unlikely alliance between a monster hunter and a vampire spawn would also be an uneasy one.
The fact that you once shared a dance with the Blade did nothing to help matters. The tenderness in his touch and the awe in his eyes told you he wanted something beyond friendship. A true love, a happily ever after, a tale straight out of the pages of a storybook—tempted though you were, you could not envision that future with Wyll. Not while you were still spending your nights tangled up with Astarion.
Even knowing now how it all turned out you would not have chosen differently.
You consider encouraging him to attend, expressing how much you would appreciate having his company there, but you let the moment pass as you follow him deeper into the shop. “It seems you have done quite well for yourself,” you comment—your words still feel more stilted than you would like, and your gaze meanders about the shop rather than meeting his—but at least you are here.
And he really has done well for himself, you think. The front of house proudly displays a tasteful array of apparel—a combination of carefully curated selections from local clothesmakers and his own elegant and inventive fashions. Perhaps you should have commissioned him to design your dress in the first place.
“I have, haven’t I?” He lets out a little hmph as he considers it. “I thought this life might be a little, uh… pedestrian, for my tastes, but… to my surprise, I like it. It suits me rather well.”
“I agree,” you say with a genuine smile as he stops you in front of a series of curtains—the dressing rooms, you assume. Sure enough he pushes one open and gestures you inside, hanging the garment bag on a hook.
“Well, darling, let’s get you out of those clothes and into that dress, hm?” Your breath hitches. You almost let your imagination run away with you, but of course he gives you your privacy. “I’ll be here whenever you’re ready.”
You peel off each layer one by one, trying not to think about the fact that your former lover is on the other side of this curtain, trying not to remember the slow and sensual ways he used to strip you bare.
But you do think about it. You do remember.
You are just friends now, you remind yourself. No more. And no less, you hope. To be without him all this time has left a hollow in your heart. You want to fill its empty spaces with his presence. You want him to be part of your life again.
So why does being here only make your heart ache harder?
And why are you still so godsdamned nervous?
You sigh and slip into your gown, admiring its A-line silhouette and its delightful shade of purple. Not quite the right fit, but that is why you are here after all. Astarion can surely fix that for you. He does work wonders with his hands.
Hands that you now realize will have to lace up the back of your dress because there is no way you’ll be able to accomplish that by yourself.
Hugging the loose garment tight against your chest, you call for help. “Astarion?”
“Yes, dear? Don’t tell me you’ve managed to fall into peril right here in my dressing room. You do seem to have a knack for finding trouble wherever you go.”
“Just… come in, please.”
He pushes through the curtain and you are instantly and acutely aware of just how snug this little space is.
“Ah, you need to be tied up, I see.”
Of course he would choose to phrase it like that. Now you are thoroughly convinced he is thoroughly enjoying your embarrassment. He always did like to make you squirm. In more ways than one, the Astarion in your head adds. Ugh. You feel a fleeting sense of relief as you spin around, but the mirror betrays you, putting your mortified expression on full display while the look on his face remains a mystery to you. The chuckle you then hear at least helps you picture his smirk.
He takes his time with you. Like he always did. Words he once said echo in your mind. A treat like you deserves to be savoured. Does it tempt him still to be so close to you? To sense your blood pumping through your veins? To see your neck so deliciously exposed? You ponder and you reminisce and you catch yourself tilting your head to one side.
It seems the tempted one is you.
You wonder if he noticed. He may be ��tying you up’ as he so eloquently put it, but you feel more like he is undressing you. Like he is uncovering you bit by bit, inch by inch, piece by piece. Like he could reach into your mind and read your most intimate thoughts even though the tadpoles are long gone.
“There we are,” you finally hear him say, snapping you back to reality. You pause in front of the mirror together and you wonder what it isn’t telling you. What he thinks when he looks upon you. 
“A fine choice, my dear,” he says as you both step out of the dressing room. “Much better than those hideous rags and that horrid armour you wore on the road.”
You roll your eyes at him. “That horrid armour kept me alive. Forgive me for picking function over fashion.”
“Oh, come now, fashion need not be sacrificed. Yours truly had both, thank you very much.” He gives you a playful bow.
You snicker—and then a full-fledged grin spreads across your face. To have this bit of banter with him again feels right. A bit of good-natured ribbing is something you can handle. What you do not know quite how to handle is—
“Luckily for you that smile more than made up for your questionable wardrobe.”
And just like that you no longer know what to say.
Astarion guides you over to a fitting platform, circling you as he sizes up what needs to be done. And though you know this is all about your dress and not you, you begin to fidget under his intense scrutiny.
“Much too long, obviously,” he remarks. “Typical. It should be taken in at the waist, too. We must do justice to that pretty figure of yours after all.”
Another flirtatious comment from him, another internal panic for you. You are not given much time to ruminate on this one though before he asks you a question that catches you off guard.
“Did you bring your shoes?”
“My shoes…?”
“Shoes, darling,” he says, elongating the rounded vowel as he repeats the word. “You have heard of the concept, surely. They come in pairs? You wear them on your feet?”
“I know what shoes are,” you insist, glancing towards the open dressing room where your trusty boots remain on the floor.
He follows your line of sight, and you nearly laugh when you look back to witness his eyebrows raise in horror then furrow again in exasperation. “Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. You will not be wearing those ghastly things to a ball.”
“They’re comfortable, and no one will be able to see them,” you say with a shrug and a smile, and this time you do laugh at the indignant noise he makes in response. Really, you did plan on wearing something more suitable—but you are enjoying this little opportunity to vex him.
“Absolutely not. As an upstanding citizen of this fine metropolis, I cannot stand idly by while you commit this outrageous crime against fashion.”
“Upstanding citizen, huh?”
“Of course,” he says with that mischievous smile of his. “I’m hardly the ‘help every poor unfortunate soul in sight’ type—that, my dear, is unique to you and you alone—but perhaps a smidgen of your do-gooder nature has rubbed off on me. Now,” he continues, returning to the matter at hand, “let me find you some decent shoes. We’ll need them to measure the length.”
Ah, that makes sense. You pout and you nod, playing your little game, but you do look forward to a new pair of shoes. Your adventures did leave your boots well-worn, not to mention covered with so much gore and grime that not even repeated scrubbings could remove all the stains. Your boots really did see everything.
He disappears into another part of the shop then reappears with a few options in hand—a selection of flats and modest heels you can actually picture yourself walking in—all simple but elegant. He knows just what you like.
“Sit and try these on,” he says, extending a hand out to you—an offer to help you down from the platform you presume—and you take it.
His touch is pure electric shock. Or maybe it is only the chill of undeath that leaves you shivering. And then you think on it, that pleasing tingle, the texture of his skin, the way his long, slender fingers interlock perfectly with yours, and your heart is fluttering, and he lets go all too soon, and you are lost. Empty. Incomplete.
And right now you are not ready to consider what that means.
You push your confusion out of your mind as you take a seat on the edge of the platform, refocusing on the task at hand. You pick out a pair of off-white kitten heels and try them on, and you find yourself pleasantly surprised by how comfortable they feel. To be sure, you take a few steps, you test other pairs, you return to the first—yes, these will do.
“Satisfied?” Astarion asks, and you nod. “Good. Back up you go, darling.”
You step onto the fitting stand once more—without assistance this time, which is somehow both a relief and a disappointment. Astarion sets about his work, pulling pins out of the small cushion tied to his wrist and pushing them through the hem, all while you stare into space and contemplate whether or not you should say anything.
You should say something, you decide. You did manage to catch up with him a little at the party last month before your drink got the better of you, but you are doing a poor job of it now. You’ve barely even talked. Not really. How can you call yourself his friend if you cannot even gather the courage to speak to him?
“How are you?” you blurt out. Those few trite words do little to express how much you truly care for his well-being, how every day you wonder if he is fed, if he is safe, if he is happy. Quickly you add, “With the whole ‘vampire tailor’ thing, I mean. No monster hunters at your door, I hope?”
His nature clearly isn’t a secret. The many mirrors give him away if nothing else.
“Not a one,” Astarion says, glancing up at you from where he kneels. “I am, after all, one of the great heroes of Baldur’s Gate. The fact that I also happen to be a vampire spawn is not so much a threat, but an… eccentricity. And a bit of eccentricity is right at home in this city.”
“I’m glad no one is giving you any trouble,” you say. Another question needles your mind, one you are almost afraid to know the answer to, but you ask it anyway. “And… are you feeding well?”
“I have my sources.” Oh. Good. That is good. Yes. Definitely. Not like it matters who or how. Not like the mere thought of him sinking his teeth into someone else crushes you. Not like the scene plays out in your mind no matter how much you don’t want it to. Your eyes shut. Your stomach twists. Your heart sinks.
“None quite like you,” he adds, and beneath that sultriness he so likes to tease you with, you detect a softness there. Or maybe it is only a trick of the imagination. A pretty lie you tell yourself.
And yet, when your eyes flicker open, all you can see is his boring back into yours, staring, seeking, searching.
Breathe. You must breathe.
And then the moment is gone, and he shifts out of your sight, concentrating his efforts on the back of your dress.
The minutes pass in screaming silence.
You wish he would fill your ears with little jokes, or idle chatter, or something, anything to save your mind from spiralling. Anything to save you from you.
You regret all you have done wrong and all you have failed to do right. And yet, you want, and you yearn, and you hope.
“It really has only ever been you, you know.”
His words shock you back to your senses and suddenly he is standing on the platform with you, mere inches away.
“Oh,” you say. Gods, what else can you say?
All is quiet between you. He fusses with your straps, and the fabric of your bodice, pins everything into its proper place. A hand lingers at your waist.
“You once told me that the world can be a kind place. That has been truer than I expected. But no one has been more good to me—and good for me—than you.”
What?
No. Whatever you think this is, you are wrong.
“I’m not so sure about that,” you protest, your heart pounding. “That night at the party… I wasn’t thinking, I… I know it wasn’t what you… I’m so sor—”
He stops you, shushing you softly. “Oh, no, no, love, you will not apologize for that. A little drunken fancy is nothing to be ashamed of. You were nothing but sweet. And it was sweet of you to worry. Unnecessary, but sweet.”
Your head is spinning. You were far from a good friend that night. You did him wrong. You were so sure.
But he does not seem offended in the least.
Quite the opposite, really.
“Although,” he says, and you hear the mischief in his voice as he leans in to speak into your ear. “I am rather curious about those pretty words you said when…”
The bell rings.
The two of you startle and separate.
“Oh, Astarion, dear?” a voice calls out, singsong yet sharp.
The scowl that then sullies his features tells you all you need to know. He curses under his breath before singing out an answer. “Just a moment, Lady Furrington. I am finishing up with another client.”
Astarion is all business now as he checks over his handiwork, and as he ushers you to the dressing rooms, and you cannot help but to mourn what could have been had no one else stepped foot through that door. You wonder what he would have done. What he would have said. What might have sparked between you.
You will lie awake tonight wondering and wondering and wondering.
You pause together just outside the dressing room, and he says, “My apologies for the abrupt finish, darling. Her requests are endless, but her coin purse is bottomless. Enough so that an extra charge here and there goes unnoticed.”
“You have to do what you have to do,” you say with a shrug. You take a step into the change room, and to your surprise, he follows you inside. You shoot him a quizzical look.
“The laces?”
“Uh, yes. Right. Thank you.”
He reaches around you as he begins to pull them loose. He is close. Impossibly, maddeningly, enticingly close. His gaze falls to your lips and, gods, you can almost taste his.
“Astarion?” cries out that same shrill voice.
He steps back. Another moment lost forever.
“Come back tomorrow night?” he asks.
Sooner than you thought, but you do not question it. You simply say, “Yes.”
You leave. You start your trek home. And, as you walk, an inkling of something forgotten—something you wanted to forget—itches within your brain. What was it he mentioned about that night? Something about ‘those pretty words’ words you said?
You think, and you think, and you think, delving deep into your fragmented memories, searching for the missing pieces you need to complete the puzzle.
You stop in your tracks.
You remember.
That night, as he put you to bed, at the height of your foolishness, you told him the most mortifying thing you could have told him.
But in wine there is truth.
You felt it. You said it. You meant it.
You love him.
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It was the right choice. The right choice. The right choice.
How many nights have you lain awake, desperate to believe in the truth of those words? You thought one day they would sink in and soothe you. Instead their endless echoing always felt more like a pulsing headache.
Funny that, last night, the very opposite thought is what kept you awake.
What if, all this time, you were wrong?
You were so sure back then that friendship was the right choice. A hard choice, but the right choice. Never had anyone given him anything without the expectation for more. You could be that person, right? You should be that person. You wanted to be that person. A friend was what he needed. What he deserved. That superceded any silly notions of romance you had in your head.
Your offer of friendship meant everything to him, or so it seemed. Not a friend in the world until you, he said. His sincerity and his soft words melted your heart, and when he took your hand in his, and gazed into your eyes, you knew you were hopelessly in love with him.
You fought it. You denied it. You cried and cried and cried over it.
Still your feelings stayed the same. And so you did the only thing you could do. You resolved to keep your secret hidden under lock and key.
As if anything in this world under lock and key is safe from the likes of Astarion.
You love him. You have always loved him. You still love him.
And it seems he knows it, too.
And maybe, just maybe, there exists the teeniest tiniest trace of a possibility that he might be interested in you?
No, no, no. Surely you are mistaken.
He thought about kissing you, though, didn’t he? You saw him glance at your lips, right? Or did you?
No, no, no. A figment of your wild and wishful imagination, nothing more.
He would never want you.
Still you primp and you preen before the mirror like you are prepping for a date, not a dress fitting. Still you want to impress him, enamour him, pretend you stood a chance with him. Still you wonder and you worry that, maybe, improbable as it seems, you did once stand a chance with him, denied him and deprived him, denied and deprived yourself.
“You deserve something real. I want us to be something real.”
Those words of his still echo in your memories. You thought, then, that friendship was the realest thing you could ever hope to share. But, if you let yourself try, you could have been something more, couldn’t’ve you?
Maybe he did want you, could want you, does want you.
And if he does…
No. Do not let yourself go there. Do not get your hopes up. Never get your hopes up.
You take a moment to breathe, pull yourself from the mirror and leave through the front door. You will go to this appointment and you will be normal and you will be sane and you will be the friend you promised him you would be, not some gawking idiot full of foolish desires.
Twenty minutes is what it takes to walk from your place to his. Twenty minutes of exercise? A good thing, of course. Twenty minutes of cycling through these same tired thoughts ad nauseum? A not-so-good thing. That will not help you through this.
Maybe it won’t make much of a difference. After all you are quite capable of sending yourself into a frenzy in a mere twenty seconds let alone twenty minutes.
When you finally arrive at his door your head is still swimming.
Breathe. Just breathe.
You did it yesterday. You can do it again today.
The bell rings.
The silence that follows is enough to deafen you.
Well, it would seem you underestimated yourself before. You thought it would take twenty seconds to achieve total panic? More like five.
Astarion appears in the blink of an eye, all elven grace and vampiric mystique, emerging from what feels like out of nowhere but in reality must have been somewhere back of shop.
He is somehow even more gorgeous today, if that is even possible. His hair, perfectly coiffed; his vest, exquisitely embroidered; his whole ensemble, impeccably tailored to emphasize his broad shoulders and slender waist. His sleeves are rolled up, and his shirt is a little more open than it perhaps needs to be at the chest, and gods, are you blushing?
You are here for a reason, and that reason is not to ogle him, tempting though it might be.
“Darling!” he says, greeting you with that brilliant smile you so adore. “I’m glad it is you, and not a certain patriar that so rudely interrupted us yesterday. There is only so much of that particular displeasure I can endure. My patience is thin enough as it is.”
“And yet you have managed to endure,” you remark, laughing a little at the thought of him attempting to navigate customer service. “The coin is that good, huh?”
“Oh, it is. Satisfying as it might be to deny my services to the worst offenders, a few of these annoying but harmless ones must be tolerated. Bad for business otherwise. Today, though, I made a point of keeping my schedule clear of all other distractions. My only priority now is you.”
You. The way he purrs out that one little word sends a thrill throughout your body.
But you must not read into that. You must temper yourself.
Be normal. Be sane. Be his friend.
“Alas, your gown is not quite done yet, though. I was just finishing up the hem when I heard you come in. It won’t take long. Follow me into the back, if you will?”
“Oh, uh, of course,” you say. You had expected more or less a repeat of the previous day—trying on the dress, making sure it fits correctly, changing back into your regular clothes, returning home. A nice, predictable order of events.
You like predictable. You like all its safeties and comforts. You like how it acts as a balm to all your anxieties. If you can predict, then you can prepare.
Unpredictable, though. Unpredictable is unnerving. Downright terrifying, even. And yet it is rife with possibilities.
The best things in your life have come from unpredictable. The greatest adventure you’ve ever had. The happiest memories.
The man you love more than anything.
Even if what passion you shared was fleeting. Even if this platonic connection is all that remains. Even if that glimmer of hope you cannot quite quash, no matter how unwise you think it, crushes you one day. You will still tend to and treasure your bond in any and every way you can.
So you take a deep breath and you follow him.
Astarion leads you into a room just big enough to double as a work area and a storage space. Rolls of fabric, diverse in colour, pattern and texture, fill the shelves lining the walls. What you notice most, though, are the in-progress projects draped over the mannequins. You would love to watch him at work. You suppose you will get one little taste of that now.
You also spot the base of a staircase in one corner, and that sparks an even greater curiosity within you. This lower floor is his business, but that upper floor is his home. A place entirely his own, and you hope he has filled it with anything and everything that makes him feel safe and happy and free. Maybe he will invite you up those stairs someday—you are friends after all—but for now you both seat yourselves across from each other at his work table.
“A good thing you came to me for this, darling,” he says, and you try not to stare as he licks the tip of his thread and pulls it through the eye of his needle with ease, “—else you would have been out of luck. Wait times are usually much longer than this.”
That is true, and you know you should have planned for this better. The ball is only a tenday away. “Oh, I’m sorry for the rush, you didn’t need to—”
“Hush, hush, my sweet,” he says, a gentle chiding that reminds you of yesterday. “It was not a bother. Not in the least. Although…” He pauses and smirks. “You haven’t paid me yet.”
Aghast, your mouth drops open, but he stops you before you can blurt out your hundred apologies.
“Now, I know that one so honest as you would never make such a mistake on purpose. Our time was cut short after all. Then again, not all of our gold was acquired by honest means, was it?”
“Thanks to your thievery,” you remind him. “Gods, you practically cleaned out the whole Counting House.”
“And yet I don’t recall you objecting. True that I picked many locks during our adventures, and why was that I wonder?” He makes a show of his hums and his haws and then one final aha. “Oh yes, that’s right. Because you asked me to.”
“Our mission was important,” you insist. “We needed gold, intel, resources… We did what was necessary to succeed. To survive.”
“Oh? Tell yourself that if you must, darling, but I think you just liked to watch my hands.”
That comment instantly warms your cheeks—and the realization that you actually have been watching his hands as he starts to sew absolutely scorches them. When you glance up to his face, you find him grinning at you.
And just like that you’re grinning too. You are embarrassed, yes, but you must admit there is something especially endearing about seeing Astarion like this—the skill, the passion, the care he puts into his work, the way his smile softens as he settles back into his state of calm and contented concentration—he looks happy.
It makes you happy. It makes you calm—or at least as calm as you can be under these circumstances. It makes you love him even more.
“You’re not exactly subtle, you know,” he says, shifting back in his chair, pulling the garment from the table and into his lap, pulling farther away from you. Have you been staring too much? Has he taken offense? Does he no longer want you here?
He pauses, and gives you a pensive look, and you look back, lost as to what to do or say or think. Maybe you should go. Give him some space. But, he invited you in, didn’t he? Said it wouldn’t take long? You can’t just leave.
And you don’t want to leave. You hope that he doesn’t want you to leave either.
He breaks the silence with a chuckle, resuming his stitching like nothing has changed. “You never were. Not that I mind, though. If you want to watch a master at work, then who am I to deny you?”
“I can hardly see what you are doing now, though.” You try to keep your words matter-of-fact. Try not to show just how unsure and insecure you are in this moment. In too many of your shared moments.
“A shame. I’m afraid you will have to settle for admiring the stitchwork when it’s done. And it will be well-worth the admiration, I assure you.”
You try to read him. He gives nothing away, offering up no more than a little smirk as you study him. He was always better at reading you than you were reading him.
You want to know. You need to know.
“I will,” you say, and that need to know brings out a boldness in you that was not there before, and though your inner voice scolds you and screams at you, you add, “though I would rather admire you.”
His eyes briefly flicker to yours, then back to the dress. You swallow hard.
“Then, by all means, bask in my presence and shower me with your praises.”
Good. No scrunching up his nose, no recoiling in disgust, no sign you went too far. But neither did he give you any indication that his feelings mirror yours.
Not that you truly expected that, of course.
Still you continue to examine him closely. He seems relaxed, focused, comfortable. There is a hint of fang to his smile and a gleam to his eye, and when he next glances at you, he raises an eyebrow.
Wait, does he actually want you to praise him? Should you? What can you even say? Oh, Astarion, you are clever, and funny, and talented, and gorgeous, and I am completely, absolutely, madly in love with you?
The greater your panic, the greater his amusement, until he can no longer resist clicking his tongue at you. “So shy now, darling. And yet you were not the least bit shy for me the last time I had you on your back.”
Oh. Whatever you expected, it wasn’t that.
Your wide-eyed, open-mouthed, heart-thumping shock earns a hearty laugh from him.
“Gods, you’re so adorable.”
Words fail you, and so you let out a giggle, its pitch too sharp, its volume too loud, its presence awkward, your presence awkward.
“It’s a good thing, my love,” he says softly, sincerely. “Trust me on that.”
My love. You zero in on those two words, and though your head tells you to dismiss them, your heart tells you to keep them and to cherish them.
And you are growing quite the little collection of words to thrill and fill you. Adorable, on your back, tied up, pretty figure, looking delicious, that smile, nothing but sweet, good to me, good for me. My love. You have not forgotten a single thing he said.
But you know it would be foolish to treat every flirtatious remark and sweet nothing as a romantic overture.
Even if you want to. And, oh, how you want to.
You seek distraction now, glancing at the table in front of you. It is a rather cluttered space, various tools of the trade scattered about—spools of thread, scraps of fabric, scissors and needles and pins—but what catches your eye most is a messy little pile of papers. Sketches.
“Are those your designs?” you ask, nodding towards the stack, leaning a little closer—just enough to imply a second question: “May I see them?”
“Yes,” he answers, and though he rolls his eyes, he smiles. “Go on, then. Take a look.”
Carefully you gather up the pages and begin your perusal. His sketches immediately impress. Astarion, the artist—you had never pictured it—but perhaps it should come as no surprise that a man with a skilled hand and a keen eye would take so well to pencil and paper. The time, the effort, and the creativity he poured into these—into every aspect of his work—is clear, and you are glad to see this side of him.
One by one, you look through the sketches, giving thoughtful attention to each and every one before moving on to the next. Some are still in their early stages, little more than rough outlines, while others are fully realized with intricate detail and vivid colour. The designs range from the everyday to the formal, from the simple to the elaborate, from the masculine to the feminine, and everything in between. A little something for everyone.
It eases you, this repetitive motion, this comforting quiet, this sweet glimpse into the life of the one you love.
Until you see it. Until your fingers tighten against the paper. Until you freeze.
Not because of the clothing, but because of the model. The shape of her figure. The shade of her skin. The style of her hair. The familiarity of her face.
It’s you.
He drew you. Like you are his muse. Like he could not help but to think of you. Like he is as in love with you as you are with him.
No, you try to tell yourself, this must be some coincidence. And even if it isn’t a coincidence—and really you should just admit to yourself that this cannot be a coincidence—it cannot mean what you want it to mean, right?
Maybe it is just because you are his friend. A real person he can easily visualize in his mind’s eye. Yes, that must be all this is. Yes, of course.
You quickly flip through the remaining pages. There is no Karlach, no Gale, no Shadowheart, no Wyll, no Lae’zel, no Halsin, no Jaheira, no Minsc—not that any of them got to know Astarion as well as you did, though. All you find are faceless figures, generic and unremarkable. Until, oh, there you are again. Oh, and once more. And again. And, by the gods, again.
“Did something catch your eye, darling?” Astarion asks, lips curled into a smirk, looking and sounding every bit like the cat that got the cream.
You pull that first sketch of you out of the pile and set the rest down, holding it in the air for him to see. “Is this me?”
“Ah, come to think of it, I did have you in mind when dreaming up that particular outfit, yes.” He shrugs, and the nonchalance of it all vexes you.
“And not only this one?”
“Not only that one, no. I do think of you often, you know.”
No. You don’t know. But maybe you are beginning to know. Beginning to let hope blossom in your heart, brave and beautiful and boundless.
He pauses his work, stares at you a moment, meets you eye to eye—and, gods, you feel like you are connecting heart to heart. Soul to soul. He speaks again, eventually, shifting back to a less serious, light-hearted tone. A retreat into his own comfort zone.
“What more can I say? I like to imagine you in my clothes, darling.”
And out of them, you can almost hear him say. Honestly you could go for a little body to body as well, but you know not to push him. Hells, you are not even a couple.
You never will be, says a different voice. An unwelcome voice. Your own voice, ever cruel and destructive. But maybe that voice of yours is wrong. Maybe it isn’t never. Maybe it is just not right now.
And you can live with not right now.
“Actually,” Astarion continues, “I’m not sure imagination is enough anymore.”
You blink at him.
“I’ve always thought working with a live model could spice things up a little. Someone to be my canvas, so to speak. Perhaps you might be willing to step into that role sometime? I rather like having you around.”
He wants you here more often. Does not mind being up close and personal with you. Wants to be up close and personal with you.
The very notion of it makes you giddy with an excitement you are no longer able to contain, and so when you open your mouth, what slips out is, “I like you, too.” Gods, what are you saying? “Like being around you, too.”
Embarrassing, yes, but you decide that grin upon his face and that laughter rippling out of him are worth it.
“If it is what you want, then I will be here.”
“It is what I want,” he says, and there is a conviction to it that sets your heart fluttering. You watch as he reaches for a pair of scissors. “Well, darling. It’s settled then. And I am pleased to tell you your dress”—a pause, a snip—“is complete.”
Oh. You were starting to wish this would take the whole night.
He sets down the scissors, the needle, and what remains of the thread upon the table, standing as he smooths out the gown—and that is when you realize it. That thread. It is thick and gold, not fine and colour-matched like you would have expected. Granted, you are not the expert here, but it is a curious choice—and a choice that makes you curious.
But, before your mind can wander too far down that path, Astarion’s voice startles you back to the present.
“Well, darling? You do realize you will have to try it on again?”
“Yes, of course,” you say, your chair screeching backwards as you push yourself out of it. “And thank you. For everything.”
“It is my job, after all,” he says, slathering his words with a thick coat of exasperation, but even he cannot hide the pride underlying them. “And for you? It is my pleasure.”
Always the flirt. But, for the first time in a long time, you allow yourself to believe there might be more to it than a little teasing or empty flattery.
And, small and insignificant as it seems, you are still wondering about that thread.
He leads you out of the back room and over to the dressing rooms, back to that same snug space you shared with him yesterday, pushing the curtain to one side and hanging up your gown. You step inside and pull the curtain closed.
You undress, and you think, and something he told you tickles your brain. Something about the stitchwork. “It will be well-worth the admiration, I assure you.”
Hmm. Maybe you should take the time to admire it.
You lift the hem and examine its inner edge, following that neat, flawless line in its circle, not a single speck of gold to be seen—
Until you find it. A hidden message, simple in design, yet elegant in execution. Four words. Four earth-shattering, heart-warming, life-changing words.
I love you too
You want to laugh and you want to cry and you want to sing. You want to wrap your arms around him and squish him and squeeze him until he can take no more. You want to tell him how much you love him, tell him a thousand times, then a thousand more, and gods, you want to hear him say it.
But to embroider those words so lovingly into the fabric is the sweetest confession he could have made to you.
You love him even more for it.
You can hardly wait to tell him—properly this time, not uttered out on some drunken late night like before—but, for now, you slip into your dress, and step into your shoes, trying hard to suppress the squeals begging to burst out of you.
He loves you. You spent so much time—too much time—convincing yourself that such a thing was impossible. But he loves you.
You exit that little room, and you see him, and you know it would only take seconds to close the gap between you and hug him and never let go. But, your dress is hanging open in the back, and you’re shaking, and you don’t want to ambush him with your touch if he is not yet ready for that.
The moment will come.
Or maybe it is time to take control of this. You will find that moment, and if you don’t, then you will create it, and then when you do, you will make it count.
Automatically he walks towards you, steps behind you, laces up your bodice, so close yet not close enough. You wish you could touch him, and the next thing you know, he is offering you his hand, and so you take it, and you squeeze it.
And he squeezes yours back.
He guides you onto the fitting stand. You catch a brief glimpse of yourself in the surrounding mirrors—the perfect fit of your gown, the way your smile shines—but the only thing you want to look at is Astarion.
He completes a single revolution around you, and when he stops in front of you, and you beam down at him, he stares back in admiration, in adoration, in awe. Like you are the sun itself. Like you are the centre of his whole world.
How could you not have known?
“You love me?”
His eyes grow wide as those words fall out of you. It’s all surprise, at first. But then it is openness. Vulnerability. “Ah. So you saw it already, then?”
“Yes,” you murmur, afraid to make a wrong move lest you wake up from this dream before you hear those words you want to hear more than anything. “You love me?”
Silence. You panic, and you retreat, pulling back, looking away. “Not that you need to say it out loud, of course. Not if you don’t want t—”
“I love you.”
Your eyes snap back to his. You watch him draw nearer and nearer, and you feel his hands find their place at your hips, and you breathe in that nostalgic scent of bergamot and brandy.
“I love you,” he says again, and you are so happy you could cry.
You throw your arms around him, pulling him into a hug that feels like home. You needed this. You needed him. And, when his arms wrap back around you, you know that he needed you, too. Here, both of you are snug, and you are safe, and you are loved.
And though you know he must know it by now—that he must see it in your eyes and feel it in your embrace—you say it anyway. “I love you, too.”
You both pull back, but only a little, just enough to smile at each other.
“This time on my own,” he begins, “it has given me the chance to think about what I truly want. All of this,” he says, gesturing around the shop, “I may not have expected to end up in a life this domestic, but… I’m happy. Mostly happy, anyway.”
He pauses, and you tilt your head, waiting, wondering, hoping.
“I want more. I want a partner. And who better than the woman who stood by my side through everything? Who always treated me with kindness and understanding? Who I just so happen to utterly adore? I want you.”
Tears well in your eyes, and you are smiling so hard it hurts, but you are sure this is the happiest moment of your life. “Then I am yours.”
And then he cups your face in his hands and kisses you.
You melt into him, into his softness and his sensuality, into the comfort of his embrace and the heat of his touch. This is perfect. This is right. This is where you belong. You pour all of your affection into every press of your lips, willing him to feel your devotion, your desire, your love down to his very core. But, when you part your lips to meet his tongue, he breaks away.
You fear something will break inside you—but his reassuring grin steadies you.
“Just a quick moment, darling,” he says. “There is but one little thing I need to do.”
Astarion steps off the platform and heads towards the front of the shop. At first you are confused. And then you understand.
The bell rings.
The ‘open’ sign is flipped to ‘closed.’
The lock clicks in place.
And, tonight, the bell will ring no more.
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Astarion locks the door and locks eyes with you.
You remember the day you met him as if it were yesterday. Little more than a beautiful stranger to you, back then, all elegance and ice. Even as your lover he felt unreachable, with you by midnight and gone by morning, no more real than a dream.
But now, as you gaze upon him, he is warmth, and he is sweetness, and he is truly, honestly himself. Mask off for you and only you.
Unbelievable, really, how far the two of you have come. And yet, with your whole heart, you believe it.
The man before you is your best friend. Your love. Your partner.
And tonight, together, you will take your first steps towards a life intertwined. Whatever that looks like.
And, gods, what does that look like? What comes next? Will he invite you into his arms? Into his home?
Into his bed?
The mere thought of it, you all wrapped up in him, sets your mind racing and your heartrate rising. There is a familiar hunger to his pretty eyes as he draws near, and you wonder if that rapid rhythm in your chest is still, to him, the irresistible siren song it once used to be. If he longs to taste your blood, your lips, your—
Oh, but you should not get too far ahead of yourself. He might not yet want what you so evidently crave. You must not forget that.
You can be patient. You will be patient. You will give him as much time as he needs.
Not that Astarion is making this easy for you. Certainly not with the way he grins his roguish grin, nor the way he wiggles his fingers as he reaches a hand to you, coaxing you down from the platform.
Maybe patience is not so necessary after all.
But surely there are important conversations to be had, which you very much want to have, and surely a night of sweet kisses and cuddles would be a good place to start, the perfect place to start, even, no matter how much you want to—
Oh. A hard pull, an audible gasp, and you are flush against Astarion. His intense stare is holding you in place just as much as his hands on your hips are.
“What’s that look for, my dear?”
“What look?”
“That mind-going-a-hundred-miles-a-minute look. We’re not overthinking now, are we?”
“No.” It's a weak attempt at denial, and you know it. “All right, maybe a little.”
“A little, she says? Just a little? Well, even if that were true, I’m afraid even a little is simply unacceptable, sweet love. Not when I’ve got you like this. Whatever shall I do with the likes of you?”
His hands shift upwards, every bit eager as they sweep along the curve of your waist, every bit assured as they cup your face. In his eyes you see your whole world spinning, and your mind continues its endless spinning along with it.
“Well, darling. I suppose then I’ll just have to kiss”—a brush of his lips—“you”—so plush and perfect against yours—“senseless.”
There is an urgency to the way he kisses you now, to how his tongue tastes and his teeth tease, and it makes you drunk with desire you have too long denied. You match his every insistent press against your lips, the need blooming between you escalating into a feverish frenzy. Your mind is indeed rendered senseless—but your body is awash with sensation.
His mouth leaves yours, leaves you breathless and boneless, but still wanting more. And more is exactly what he gives you as he kisses a trail along your jaw. To your neck, perhaps? No, to your ear, and you giggle when he nibbles at your lobe.
He whispers, "Come upstairs with me?"
As if there were any chance you would say no to him now. "Yes."
And yet he makes no moves to whisk you away. Instead he pulls you back into the blistering heat of his kiss, his apparent haste to have you making you doubt whether you will even make it up to his quarters at all. His every impatient touch has you envisioning how he might take you—bent over his worktable, or pushed against the dressing room wall, or laid out on the floor, anywhere, everywhere—until, oh, he is tugging loose the ties at your back.
It is all suddenly a bit too much. A bit too fast. A bit too real.
Is he actually truly ready for this?
Astarion instantly senses the change in you, moving back, but keeping close. And even though he is calm and composed, and gives you a kind smile, you cannot help but feel that this precious moment is in ruins, and the reason is you. "I'm sorry, I—"
"Oh, my love. Always so full of apologies even when there is no need for them. How about we go upstairs, make ourselves comfortable—change back into your everyday clothes first if that would suit you better—and we'll sit and have a chat, hm?"
You take a deep breath to steady yourself. "That sounds wonderful. Truly."
"Good," he says, nodding towards the dressing rooms. "Off you go, then. I'll be waiting right here."
You make your way inside, glancing at your flustered face in the mirror before you slip out of your gown, your worries creeping their way back into your frazzled mind.
Where did it all go wrong?
To connect through touch is something you want desperately. And, by now, you are almost entirely sure Astarion wants to share in that with you, too. But therein lies the problem: almost isn't enough, is it?
What if he is only doing this because he thinks it will please you?
And how can you be sure when you hardly know how to be sure of anything?
Part of you still feels ashamed for lusting over him, knowing all that you know. The other part of you just feels ridiculous—here you are, pulling on layer after layer of clothing, when every indication suggests he wants to get you naked before the night is through.
You analyze every moment you've shared tonight, searching for even the slightest of signs that this is all just a performance.
Yet you find none.
Maybe the best thing to do is to just trust him. Trust him to make his own choices, to decide his own limits, to navigate all of this together with you.
After all, if you are sure of only one thing in this world, it is that Astarion loves you.
You gather the hem of your dress into your hands one last time before you leave it behind, tracing over every line and every loop of his embroidered message, committing those beautiful words to memory. It is exactly what you need to bring a smile back to your face.
And, when you finally step out of the dressing room, Astarion matches that smile the moment he sees you.
The two of you walk hand in hand into the back room and up, up, up the stairs, your anxious anticipation growing with every single step you take.
"I'd tell you I'd give you the grand tour, but I'm afraid my home is far too humble for that," he remarks, and for the first time tonight, you notice a bit of a shake to his laughter, an irregular height to its pitch.
And here you thought that the only nervous one was you.
What if that means—
No, you'd better not worry what that means.
No matter what happens, you will be here for him as he is here for you.
You give his hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'm sure it's perfect. And I'd take a nice, cozy, humble home over a palace any day."
"I might not have always agreed with that sentiment, but now?" Reaching the door at the top of the stairs, he pauses long enough to smirk at you before twisting the knob. "I find that I do."
You step inside, taking in as much of the surrounding space as you can. The only light emanates from the fireplace, its flickering flames casting a sensual glow across the room. The open layout is typical of city merchants' quarters—no walls needlessly taking up the already limited space—a sitting area on one side, a small disused kitchen on the other. A pair of strategically placed dividers offers some sense of separation, and behind them—oh, yes, that is most definitely his bed.
Best not to linger too long on that thought.
Although you do make a mental note that it is big enough for two.
Taking both your hands in his this time, Astarion pulls you towards the loveseat in front of the fire, playfully pushing you into its comfy cushions and planting a single kiss upon your lips that you hope is a promise for many more.
He does not yet take his place at your side, however, instead lighting a candle on the coffee table—and it is then you study the scene before you.
A now-lit candle. A vase home to a single blush-pink rose. Two goblets and a bottle of your favourite red wine. A spread that is romantic. Meticulous. Premeditated.
You let out a chortle.
"What?" Astarion asks, eyes narrowed, but lips curved into an unmistakable smile.
"It's just so"—a bigger, brighter laugh bursts out of you—"so obvious."
"Obvious? Obvious?" He tosses his head to one side as he scoffs. "Are you really only realizing this now? Darling, I have been obvious this entire time. You, on the other hand, have been hopelessly oblivious."
And, in retrospect, you can admit that it's true what he says. The evidence was everywhere, even if you could not, would not, thought you should not believe any of it.
But you do now.
He settles next to you on the loveseat, warmth rushing to your cheeks at his sudden nearness. His fingers, cold to the touch though they are as they interlock with yours, do nothing to cool you. No, if anything, they have quite the opposite effect; the whole of you hot and molten beside him.
"Tell me, love," he begins, the purr in his voice and the mischief in his grin telling you he intends to use every ounce of his charisma to its fullest extent. "Should I have serenaded you with song? Recited to you a sonnet? Scattered a trail of rose petals from your door straight to my bed?"
"Maybe, though it's not too late," you suggest. "If you would like to regale me with music and poetry, I won't complain."
"Oh, my dear. I wouldn't be quite so sure of that. I am a man of many talents, yes, but I'm no bard. Although, if the result is hearing you laugh again, then it might still be worth a try."
You grin. "Then try."
Astarion clears his throat dramatically, and with his back tall and straight, and his nose held high in the air, he starts to speak.
You cannot even begin to take him seriously.
"Your skin so sweet and lips divine, / your blood the most delicious wine. / Each precious bite is my delight; / so let me make you mine tonight."
"You're ridiculous," you say—but you are indeed laughing.
"Why thank you, darling," he says, lowering his head in a mock bow. "Ridiculously eloquent, I hope? Or ridiculously charming? Ridiculously good-looking, at least?"
"Just ridiculous."
He gasps. "Oh, how you wound me. And here I was, professing my profound affection."
"It sounded more like you just want to eat me."
"Maybe I do want to eat you"—he leans in enticingly close—"in every sense of the word."
There is no mistaking his meaning now, is there?
You want this—you can feel it in pounding heart, and your weakened limbs, and your aching core—you want, you want, you want.
And yet you fear. Fear falling back into the dark depths of doubt, panic dragging you deeper, deeper, deeper down until you're drowning.
But you do not fall for it is Astarion's hands that keep you safe on solid ground.
"Oh, my sweet, lovely, darling girl."
And it is not only his hands, but his voice that soothes, and his eyes that blaze with such fierce certainty that you wonder how you could have ever failed to see just how much he cherishes you.
"Let me state the obvious because it seems obvious is what you need: I love you."
How new to your ears those words still are and yet you already think the sound of them sweeter than any song. You beam at him, because of course you do, and he beams right back, because of course he does, because this, this togetherness, is what you both want, what you both need, what you both deserve.
That look, so full of adoration, beckons you forward, and so you move in slowly, kiss him softly, hold him sweetly. He does the same, at first, an arm wrapping around your back, the opposite hand snaking its way down to cup your backside. Not that you resist. Nor do you resist when, unexpectedly, he pulls you hard against him, laughter bubbling out of you from the surprise and the clumsiness of it. And yet, here you are now in his lap, and here he is guiding your legs to straddle him, and it dawns upon you just how suggestive this new position is.
Even the slightest roll of your hips might have… well, quite the arousing effect.
Oh, he knows exactly what he's doing, the sneak.
And, if this is how he wants you, then that must mean—
"And," he says before you can finish the thought, "I want to explore anything and everything that loving you means."
Anything. Everything. Never have those two words sounded so sublime, his voice like velvet, his implication indisputable. Your imagination runs rampant, unlimited and unsuppressed, your mind opening itself fully to passion and possibility.
And you hope imagination will blossom into beautiful reality.
Astarion buries his face into your neck, peppering it with little kisses—maddeningly where you know he knows it tickles—revelling in every giggle he draws out of you. Vexing though it is, yes, the levity of it amuses you, calms your nerves.
You did, back in those early days, feel most ease with him whenever you would let yourselves be silly. You remember it well. Perhaps so does he.
And then—when tension fades, when you are limp and pliable in his arms—the mood shifts. Then, he kisses you where it doesn't tickle. Then, those sounds spilling out of you are decidedly not laughter.
His mouth moves to meet yours. A heady mixture of love and lust swirls about in your mind, and you succumb to it, to him, to every brush of his tongue and graze of his teeth. Almost embarrassing how little it takes to make you squirm about in his lap—but his body answers yours just as readily, the twitch of him against you leaving no doubt to his burgeoning desire.
This is really going to happen, isn't it?
"And"—you mourn the loss of his lips—"if all of this is somehow not obvious enough"—but his husky tone has you enraptured—"then let me be clear: I will not be satisfied tonight unless and until I've fucked you thoroughly."
Oh. You stare in stunned silence, mouth agape, as you process the filth you just heard: his lust stated so exquisitely explicitly that you long to press into the hardness you know you will find there, kiss him wildly, pleasure him endlessly.
And that, you decide, is exactly what you will do.
But your affection is too soft and too shy to plunge any deeper without testing the waters first. You kiss him once, then twice, then again and again and again, tentative touches turning tender then teasing as your courage grows. Astarion welcomes it all, wants more of it all, urging you to take this further in all the ways he can: pulling you closer, holding you tighter, kissing you harder. When at last your hips begin to undulate against his, he matches your rhythm, eager for you to feel the full length of him against your wet and wanting core.
With shaking hands you unfasten the singular clasp that had been holding his vest closed. That ever anxious part of you waits a moment for his objection, expects it, dreads it—but it doesn't come. Instead he only gives you his gentle encouragement.
"Go on, love. Undress me. Touch me."
You nod and you smile. Yes, there is anxiety in your anticipation, but so is there desire that drives you, and elation that thrills you, and such deep, overwhelming love for the man before you that how could you not want to devote yourself to pampering him?
Button by button you work your way down his shirt, exposing more and more of him until every fastening is undone. You examine the hard planes of his chest, first with eyes and then with hands, delighting in the way his smooth skin and firm muscle feel beneath your palms. He purrs his approval, rocking his hips against yours with such abandon that you curse your clothes for preventing him from pushing inside you.
Your fingers trail downwards, delicate but daring as they dance towards their destination. When at last you reach to undo his trousers, your eyes dart up to his, one last search for any sign he doesn't want this—but the look he gives you, part lust, part unwavering, undying trust, tells you what deep down you already know.
And it is all the permission you need.
Your attention returns to where he wants it to be. The sight of him, his arousal straining against fabric in his desperation for you, intensifies the throbbing between your own thighs. And so, with eager hands, you set him free.
You know his body well. Studied him with all of your senses. Learned how to glide and twist him into a whimpering mess with only a hand. And yet, practiced as you are in his pleasure, you cannot help the gasp that escapes your throat when you finally set eyes on his cock. To see him so riled and ready, to know it is all because of you—it fills you with awe, and with pride, and with overwhelming desire to put all you have learned to good use.
You start with a stroke of the hand, sliding up and sliding down his shaft, pulling the sweetest of sighs from his lips. Oh, how you love it when he is needy like this, hips moving in time with your every repeated motion. You keep touching him and teasing him, hand gliding up and down and up and down, thumb sweeping across the milky bead gathered at the tip.
But what you really want is a taste.
You lean forward for a kiss—only a fleeting peck, nothing more—and, if the way he huffs and pouts is any indication, it isn't enough. But you have quite a different use for your mouth in mind, don't you? You withdraw your hand, and he opens his mouth in protest, but no words come—for by now he is wide-eyed and mesmerized as you lick your thumb clean, savouring his salty taste. You lower yourself to your knees.
"May I?" you ask, smiling slyly up at him.
"Oh, my love. There are few sights so delightful as your lips wrapped around my cock."
His lewd words bring fresh heat to your cheeks, and he laughs.
"Hmm, I must say that flustered look of yours does have its appeal, too," he says, and you try to maintain your composure as you grab one of the little couch cushions, settling it comfortably beneath your knees. "Especially when it means you're imagining me inside you."
Oh, that unabashedly wicked, aggravatingly arrogant, adorably lovable man. The advantage might be his now, but he won't be the one holding it for long.
"And," he continues, growing more smug by the second, "come to think of it, there are many, many positions that suit you just as beautifully. Like when—"
The words die in his throat as you lick a languid stripe along his length, earning from him a low, pleasured groan. The sound pleases you immensely. But what a shame it would be if he were to leave his filthiest fantasies unspoken.
If he loves to tease you so, then why should you not do the same?
You run your tongue all over him: exploring every inch, tracing every vein, flicking against the tip, but never quite taking him into your mouth. When you have him whimpering the way you like, you pause just long enough to prompt him to say what he failed to before: "Like when…?"
"When— gods—"
Oh dear, it seems language is lost to him again the very moment your lips close around him. You bask in your triumph, sucking him and swishing him with your tongue, watching the way he watches you. And though at times his eyes flutter shut and his head falls back, his gaze always finds its way back to you.
You keep working him, using your hands to pump him and play with him as your mouth performs its magic, rediscovering all the little things that drive him wild. It feels good to make him feel good. It feels even better knowing how much he truly desires this.
"You want to know what I like best of all?" he manages, eventually, his tone dark and throaty; you hum your enthusiastic assent, and the vibration of it sends a shudder through him.
But the words he says send a shudder through you.
"The sight of you lying utterly helpless beneath me."
Oh. Well. You do love this—relishing his pleasure as you bob your head along his length—but you very much love that, too. You remember well how it felt. How letting him have his way with you could awaken either of his extremes. The vampire at his most feral, or the man underneath, a secret softness reserved only for you.
When all was done between you, you used to worry those tenderest moments were only part of his act. But maybe you were wrong.
Maybe they were always real.
"I've been thinking about you"—you ache more and more for your own satisfaction now though you never stop giving him his—"fantasizing about you ever since that night at the party. Wondering what it would be like to have you in my own bed."
And you know at once his bed is soon to be your destination when he leans forward to give you a gentle nudge. You still, letting him slide out of your mouth with a wet pop.
"And, my love," he whispers into your ear, "I intend to find out. Now."
Far be it from you to deny this beautiful man anything he wants.
Astarion rises to his feet, shrugging off his open shirt and pushing off his trousers. To see him like this, so gorgeously and gloriously nude, leaves you speechless.
"Well, darling?" he says, shamelessly eyeing you up and down. "I assure you you'll have much more fun without your clothes."
Needing no further encouragement, you start to disrobe—but your pace is found wanting and Astarion is all out of patience. He steps forward, tugging and tearing at your layers, eager for you to join him in his state of undress. Sure enough you hear a button clack against the floor, fallen victim to his reckless haste.
"Careful!" you insist, but really, you're more amused than annoyed.
Not to mention aroused.
"Oh, don't you worry, my dear. I'll fix that right up for you."
"You'd better."
"Of course. I'm your personal tailor for life now."
For life. This really is it for you, isn't it? You are his, and he is yours, and for however long you both walk this realm, you will spend your days and your nights together.
You wouldn't have it any other way. And neither would he.
When at last you are beaming and bare before him, Astarion takes a step back for a better look at you.
He stares.
And then he strikes.
You are swept into his arms, into his passion, barely conscious of anything but the feel of skin against skin and lips against lips—though it is abundantly clear he is a man on a mission. He pulls you along in his mad shuffle to reach the bed, sacrificing finesse to gain speed, unable to wait a second longer than necessary to have you.
And indeed he wastes no time in lifting you onto the mattress and pushing you flat on your back beneath him.
"Finally," he growls and he grins, and you're already there bucking on the bed before he has even touched you where you need him. "Finally I have you right where I want you. Right where you belong here in my bed. Right here with me."
The thought of this one day becoming your bed—your home—thrills you almost as much as his impatient touches do.
But, as eager as he is, he still recalls exactly how to excite you. Still gives ample attention to all those places most sensitive and secret. Still treats your body like his sanctuary—a sacred thing to be revered, to be relished, to be worshipped.
And, as he settles between your thighs, you know the pleasure he'll, oh, so willingly provide will be nothing short of divine.
He starts with a single lick—one long and languid glide along your slit—and already, all at once, it's too much, and it's not enough, and it's the most wonderfully perfect sensation you have ever known. It pulls from you a shake and a cry, and in turn, a soft laugh from him as he takes pride in his ability to please you. He licks you a second time, and then a third, and again, and again, until his tongue is lapping at you with a steady fervency.
The bliss he brings you is better than you remember. Countless times you tried to relive your memories—desperate to return to him, if only in daydreams—but your fingers always paled in comparison to the way his tongue dips inside your cunt and flicks against your clit.
Although maybe it is better than ever now that you know he loves you.
You grasp for his hand and he grabs it gladly.
And he certainly knows how to work you well. You writhe about, your moans mewling and wanton, your body wanting more, more, more. The pleasure you crave is close now. You glance at your lover—mussed up curls and pink-tipped ears, his attention focused wholly upon your undoing—and to know that Astarion is the one making you feel this way intensifies the heat coiling in your centre.
A little more is all it will take. You ready yourself for it, your grip tightening, your limbs trembling, your feet bracing against his shoulders. And, when he tongues you with the quick, precise flicks you like best, you yield, wave after wave of pleasure crashing into you. Astarion does not relent, continuing to devour you until you are thoroughly sated and spent.
You lie there, panting hard, basking in the pleasant tingle that still lingers in the aftermath of your orgasm. Gods, you haven't felt this good in ages. And, from the smug smile that begins to spread across his face, it seems he knows it, too.
"Well," Astarion says, licking his lips as he sits up. "You look positively wrecked, darling. And all because of me. You want more, don't you?"
Such self-satisfied bravado. Not that it stops your core from clenching at his suggestion. Nor do you deny him when he shifts over you, cock gliding along your swollen folds, ready to push inside.
Oh, you want more very, very badly.
And so you invite him in. "Yes."
Slowly Astarion sinks into your sex until he is buried to the hilt. A perfect fit. You did always take him exceptionally well. He pulls back, and pushes in, and pulls back, and pushes in, coaxing gasps and moans out of you, ensuring you feel each and every inch of him as he makes love to you.
And it is love, this time. Love that underlies the lust in his eyes. Love that fuels the languorous rhythm of his hips. Love that urges him to lavish you with little kisses.
You return his love in every way you can: touching, holding, caressing, kissing, enjoying all that is nostalgic and all that is new. You roll your hips. You cry his name. Surely the extent of your adoration is made abundantly clear—but, if by any chance all this isn't enough, you sing it out loud: "I love you!"
He lets out a laugh, a soft and elated little sound. "I love you, too."
But, for all his sweetness, so is there carnality, frantic and feral and finally free. He thrusts harder, moves faster, pours all of his passion into every motion he makes. Of course you are more than happy to allow him this indulgence. The addictive friction, the lewd noises of bodies colliding, the delight of being filled so completely—every intoxicating detail feeds that familiar heat building within you.
Sensing your impending release, Astarion lifts his head from where it had been nestled in your neck and draws back just far enough to reach a hand between your legs, rubbing circles into your clit with his thumb. You imagine you must be quite a sight—all shivering and squirming under him as you begin your surrender to bliss—but his stare is locked only upon your eyes.
And it is then that you lose yourself to the euphoria he gives you. Then, that your walls clench around him; then, that you let out a keening cry; then, that pleasure radiates from your core to every extremity of your body. And where you go, Astarion is quick to follow, groaning as he empties himself inside of you.
He collapses on top of you, and you pull him into a tight embrace, vowing you will never, ever let him go again.
You missed him so much. Love him so much. And, to be with him like this, so close and connected, makes you feel that all is finally right in this world.
A comfortable and contented silence falls between you.
Until it breaks.
"I wasn't entirely honest with you before."
His words hang heavy in the air as panic takes hold. What if this was too much, what if this was too fast, what if he did not want any of this at all?
But then, when you feel like you might never catch your breath again, he takes your face into his hands and grins devilishly. "What I really like best of all is that I can take a single glance at you and tell just hopelessly in love with me you are."
Oh, that infuriating and wonderful man.
"Don't scare me like that!" you say, scolding him. But, despite his foolishness—maybe because of his foolishness if you're really being honest with yourself—you lunge forward for a kiss. Then another. And another.
When your lips breaks apart, and his eyes are again heavy-lidded with lust, he makes his suggestion: "Perhaps I might… find some way to make it up to you?"
You think a moment. And then you grin. "Why, yes, I do happen to have one idea in mind. About the ball… be my plus one?"
He does not roll his eyes, nor does he complain of the tedium he'd have to endure, nor does he make any attempt at denying you. He answers only with a soft smile and a single word.
"Always."
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Tag List: @preciouslittlebhaalbae, @roguishcat, @zozoparsnips, @goodgirlgonebard, @amoremagnificentbastard, @hellethil, @xxnashiraxx, @vividiana, @dramatiquechipmunk (join tag list for future fics here!)
Thank you so much for reading!
Special Note: This will be a series on AO3 as well, plus all entries will be crossposted here on Tumblr!
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pluckyredhead · 3 days ago
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my life for the kon clark thoughts, i love hearing your takes on the superfam
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Okay this bait wasn't QUITE as powerful but it still got the job done lol. Also I won't be talking about the YJ show as I only ever watched the first episode, sorry!
Anyway. The thing I want to talk about is Is Clark Kon's Dad Discourse, which honestly is less discourse so much as it is half of the fandom cheerfully writing Kon as Jon's big brother and the other half going "Ummm Clark and Kon are actually more like brothers as they have said many times in canon" (they have not). And more than that, the question of whether Clark is actually a good dad/brother/cousin/whatever the El he is to Kon (he is not). (Sorry Clark I still love you.)
Content warning: rape, both hypothetical and in-canon statutory, will be mentioned.
TL;DR: 1. Like Dinah and Roy, Clark and Kon have a complicated relationship that English doesn't have a word for, and to reduce it to "father and son" or "brothers" is doing a disservice to the interesting dynamic that actually exists, and 2. unlike Dinah, Clark does not come off well here, although it's important to take the Doyleist argument into account here as well as the Watsonian one.
Let's take the second thing first. There have been several times in canon that Clark has been presented with a teenage biological relative and gone "Well, I'm not going to take responsibility for that." (Three separate continuities with Kara, two with Kon, although to be fair in post-Crisis he did make a half-hearted effort with Kara.) Most infamously, when he first met his 15-year-old recently orphaned cousin Supergirl in 1959, he put her in an orphanage. There are two reasons for this, editorially:
DC doesn't want Superman tied down by a kid.
Equally if not more importantly, DC doesn't want the kid tied down by Superman.
It took 77 years for DC to give Clark permanent custody of child, when Jon was born. But also...DC designed both Kara and Kon to have their own adventures and eventually their own books. That's a lot harder to do if they're under the literal Super-vision of Clark. DC wanted these kids to be reasonably independent and autonomous, so it's hard to "blame" Clark for that when this is such a good example of how, uh...he's a fictional character and doesn't get to decide what he does.
But a Doyleist argument only goes so far if the writers don't bother to give Clark a good reason to behave in a certain way. So switching back to the Watsonian side of things: does Clark actually have a responsibility to Kon, and did he fail to meet it?
I have seen people argue that Clark doesn't have a responsibility to Kon, because he did not consent to having his DNA used to create him, and thus Clark is analogous to a rape victim being forced to care for the resulting baby. I understand the logic behind this argument but I don't think it's a fair one because, well, Clark wasn't raped, and it's inappropriate to say that he was. It's closer to someone stealing donated eggs or sperm from a clinic - not exactly like, since those are obviously donated consensually, but much closer. And regardless, we don't consider the donor responsible for the baby that results, so it's not like that analogy puts more onus on Clark.
However. I do think there is a difference between being responsible for a child in the sense of being obligated to raise that child, and being responsible for a child in the sense of making sure the child is okay. That holds true whether you are biologically related to the kid or not. If I see a small child running down the street without an obvious adult guardian, I will ask that child where their grownup is, because we live in a society and it's the right thing to do.
Obviously Kon was not a small child when he first appeared, although I don't think we should underestimate his naivete - he was physically and mentally 16, yes, but he had literally zero life experience. But while I don't think Clark had a responsibility to make up the guest room for Kon, I do think that he had a responsibility to make sure Kon was in a safe and healthy environment. Quite frankly, I think Clark had more of an obligation than an ordinary person, because he's Superman, and he's supposed to be the best of us. Ethics aside, it's out of character for him not to do the right thing.
And this is where things really fall apart, because for much of his original solo series, Kon was not, in fact, in a safe and healthy environment.
I'm not talking about crime fighting, or any danger or injuries that resulted from that, because it's just a function of the genre. Kon would have nearly died from clone plague whether he was superheroing or not. I'm talking about:
The fact that one of the adults in a position of semi-responsibility for Kon was Rex Leech, a man who very clearly intended to financially exploit Kon as much as he possibly could, and pimped out his own daughter to get Kon to sign with him.
(The other adult responsible for Kon was Dubbilex and he has never done anything wrong, ever, in his life. <3 u Dubbilex.)
Kon's long-running relationship with an ADULT WOMAN, Tana Moon, which was so sketchy that all of her coworkers were like "Ummmmmm what's up with you dating a 16-year-old?" but literally no one ever intervened on Kon's behalf.
The Knockout storyline, in which it's heavily implied that their relationship was sexual, making it very much statutory rape, and to which Kon has a pretty clear trauma response afterwards.
The fact that no one except that one poor truant officer is making this kid go to school.
Pretty consistent housing insecurity (Kon only has housing at Cadmus and later in that one building where he's the super because he works there, which...he's a minor).
This is quibbling because it never (to my recollection) comes up in the comics, but what is Kon's legal status? Is he property of Cadmus? Is he a person, as far as the government is concerned? Does he have a social security number, citizenship status, legal rights? I'm guessing no because he literally doesn't even have a name until Clark gets around to giving him one *checks notes* six years after they first meet.
I want to talk about that issue because it's extremely important to me: Superboy #59 (1994 series). Clark shows up and takes Kon to the Fortress for the first time:
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Look at Kon's first speech balloon. Not only does he not know that Superman is Clark, he doesn't know that Superman is Kal-El, and he had no idea either possibility existed. He knows absolutely nothing about Superman, and he's completely severed from his own Kryptonian heritage. Clark has given him nothing.
Until now.
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According to this timeline, the original Kon-El was a Kryptonian who was adopted into the El family. Also, the Supergirl they're talking about isn't Kryptonian, which is why Kon implies that she isn't automatically entitled to the S-shield but is granted permission by Clark.
I'm fascinated by the different ways Clark and Kon view family here: Kon, whose life has only ever consisted of being a superhero, sees being part of the family as...branding, basically. It's Clark who sees it as having to do with who they are as people. (Yes, Clark is being weird and cold here in the art - he was going through some shit in the Superbooks, don't worry about it.)
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MY HEART IS GOING TO BURST. YOU HAVE A NAME, BABY. YES YOU DO.
But, like...as lovely a moment as this is, it's also a pretty dire indictment of Clark. Having a name means so much to Kon that he weeps - and is such a fundamental part of being a person - and you only got around to it now??? And fine, maybe it wasn't Clark's responsibility...but it should have been someone's.
The other specific comic I want to talk about is very different tonally: Superman #155 (1987 series), in which Kon shows up at the Kents' house for dinner, and Clark is a giant pissy baby about it:
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For context, Kon still doesn't know Clark's secret ID, and this is several years before he moves to Smallville. He says he stopped by for dinner because he met the Kents "a few months back" and they invited him to visit anytime because he "reminded them of their son" - but actually that was six years ago, which just kind of goes to show you how fundamentally deprived of family and human connection this boy is, that he would remember and take them up on this offer after so long.
Orrrr maybe he's just doing some detective work, because Clark is sure Kon is there because he's figured out Clark is Superman, and sure enough, Kon does drop a few heavy hints that are juuust this side of plausible deniability. Either way, Clark spends the entire issue being a pissy, bratty child about it:
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LITERALLY HE GOES INTO HIS ROOM AND TELLS KON TO STOP TOUCHING HIS STUFF. Big only child energy. (He also, notably, does not know the name of Young Justice. Dude is FULLY checked out of Kon's life.)
Anyway, Pa is finally like "Listen, if you trust him enough to let him be Superboy, don't you trust him enough to tell him the truth?" and Clark's like "But being Clark is my private, personal life, and I don't want to share it with too many people," and Pa's like "HE IS A CHILD WITH NO PARENTS CAN YOU PLEASE GET A GRIP."
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Clark realizes he's being an asshole, and though he doesn't come right out and confess, he does relent enough to teach Kon how to milk a cow:
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Yes, the metaphor here is that Kon is trying to milk Clark's secrets out of him, complete with the, um, imagery in that first panel. Anyway, I'm not sure if there's actually an issue where Clark explicitly tells Kon that he's Superman, but this issue ends on a note that makes it pretty clear that Kon knows, and that Clark knows he knows, and that Kon knows he knows he knows, so. (It's obviously explicit by 2003 when Clark makes Kon move in with the Kents.)
Anyway, I love this issue because Clark is allowed to be 100%, undeniably, unequivocally wrong. He is being petty and jealous and immature...and human. His behavior here is totally understandable and relatable, even when he's being a brat - and because he's called out on it, he's allowed to improve.
And that, I think, is what we're missing in the Clark and Kon dynamic. Though there are external narrative reasons for it, Clark's neglect of Kon is, in the gentlest possible terms, Not A Good Look.
(Also not a good look: barging into Kon's life in 2003 after paying zero attention to him for years and forcing him to live in a town he hates wearing glasses he also hates. Did Clark tell Kon he would be honored if he would also accept the name "Conner Kent?" Was he given a choice at all? YOU'RE OVERCORRECTING, CLARK. And then he just totally bails again and makes his elderly parents do all the actual work of parenting! There is a super (ha) telling line in Supergirl (2005 series) where she asks Ma why Clark didn't ever have her (Kara) live with the Kents, and like...why does Clark get to decide who Jonathan and Martha have in their house? WEIRD.)
Again, I'm not saying Clark needed to adopt Kon, but I do think that he bore some kind of responsibility to at least make sure he was well taken care of and to check in regularly - and it would have felt more in character. But he didn't...and because that looks bad, it has gone almost completely unacknowledged for 32 years except for Superman #155 and that bit in Superboy: The Man of Tomorrow where Kelex calls Clark out on not noticing Kon was missing for two weeks.
Because if the comics admitted that Clark wasn't stepping up to the plate, they could also tell us why. Clark's reasoning in Superman #155 is not actually a sufficient reason, but it's completely understandable and makes us sympathize with him. My personal headcanon is that immediately upon meeting Kon, Clark was recovering from the profound trauma of, you know, dying and being resurrected, something that goes largely unaddressed in the comics. I would absolutely buy that he didn't have the mental or emotional capacity to deal with "oh a lab cloned a replacement of me which they activated because I died and now the clone wants to hang out." I would even buy that the longer he didn't involve himself in Kon's life, the guiltier he felt, and the more he thought he might be unwelcome for not doing so sooner. But none of that is actually canon, because again, the comics pretty much completely ignore Clark's failure here...and that makes it look so much worse, because it looks like he just doesn't care.
Finally, to address the question of what to call their relationship: arguably Clark and Lex are Kon's biological parents, which yes, is very funny, but also the terms we use for clone relationships tend to be very driven by how old the clone is rather than a donor/donee relationship. Like, I might say Kon is kind of Clark's kid...but I would never say that Match is Kon's kid, because Match and Kon are approximately the same age, which goes to show how much these terms come from appearances rather than biological relationships.
Instead, I'd rather look at how they refer to each other, like I did with Dinah and Roy. This post is already insanely long so I'm not going to dig through three decades of comics for the relevant panels, but trust me when I say that especially in the 90s, it was a running bit that people would assume Superman was Kon's father and he would say "He's not my dad." He is very, very consistent about that, and always in this sort of awkward, uncomfortable way rather than a rebellious one. (My baby, let me hug you.)
You could argue that their dynamic is more "brothers with a large age gap," since they were (eventually) raised by the same parents - Kon calls Martha and Jonathan "Ma and Pa," not "Grandma and Grandpa." They do occasionally fall into something that feels like those roles - see Superman #155 above, and really any time they are talking about the Kents. But they also aren't close, by any definition, which is certainly possible with siblings, but it doesn't feel like a lived-in dynamic to me. When Clark used it at the end of Superboy: The Man of Tomorrow, it felt very jarring and unearned, and I can't think of a single other time either one has used the word to refer to the other. (If I'm wrong, please let me know! I'd be fascinated to see other examples.)
Finally there's Superboy #59, where Clark chooses to name Kon after an adoptive cousin he never met. Which, not to make a joke of it, but feels much more like how Clark actually feels about Kon. And certainly "cousin" is a term Clark is comfortable extending to the rest of the Superfamily: Kara is obviously his first cousin, but he used it for Matrix and Linda Danvers (not related to him or even Kryptonian), and it covers a wide range of alternate universes/clones/Daxamites/look it's complicated.
Ultimately, Clark and Kon don't really have a familial term they use for each other on any kind of consistent basis, but if I had to pick one, I think "cousin" would be the one they would both feel comfortable using - and I think Kon would also happily apply it to Kara and Jon, too. (Although I did once read a fic where Jon refers to Kon as his "bruncle" and every day that is not canon is another crime against humanity.)
IN CONCLUSION:
They aren't father and son.
They aren't really brothers, either.
But it would be very funny if Kon started calling Lex "Pops."
If you are going to have a character who is supposed to be a paragon of virtue act like kind of a dick, you should acknowledge it in the comic so that he can maybe improve his behavior a little or at least explain it.
Kon's bad at milking.
THE END.
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katetorias · 5 months ago
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yes a sense of unity and collective “You” is good for systems to have but why are some people on this website acting like letting alters have individual sense of selves is going to tank your chances of recovery. denying parts their selfhood would involve not listening to them, accommodating or helping them feel happy (which is really hard to do as part of a system!!! for obvious reasons!!!!!)
forcing them to consider themselves just one person when their lived experiences do not match up with that is literally making things worse. some systems feel like they have been just one person their whole life, some don’t! some systems are very differentiated from each other, some aren’t!!
systems are as uniquely individual as literally every person on earth! everyone on this planet has lived different lives from each other and in turn will experience the same things differently from one another. that is like a very simple thing to grasp. it is very easy to not be ableist.
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sonic the hedgehog tumblr dashboard simulator
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💠 extremegayr Follow
got held up in traffic today cause some noob couldnt drive the fucking loop-de-loop. lmfao fucking coward
15 notes
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🎛 420zone Follow
ok but robotnik's kind of a dilf tho
🌫 wispgender Follow
he's literally a war criminal can we NOT do this tumblr
🎛 420zone Follow
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📰 its-no-use Follow
@wispgender dont u literally simp for nominatus like who is one to talk
🌫 wispgender Follow
NOMINATUS ISN'T REAL????
🛜 viralsensation-destructorofworlds Follow
that you know of
🌫 wispgender Follow
what
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🔷 sonicinthewild
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43,834 notes
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☣️ lineinthesand Follow
saw sonic the hedgehog irl once. he showed up at my village, released 30 feral pickys in the town hall, paid the ice cream vendor roughly a thousand rings for a single chili dog, told me not to waste my life worrying about the little things, and then caused a fucking tornado
🧿 spiralhillspindash Follow
ok and??? you're not special
☣️ lineinthesand Follow
THIS WAS A PERSONAL POST GO AWAAAAY
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🌠 chaoinspace2electricboogaloo
sucks that sticks the badger hates all technology you know she would do NUMBERS on here
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☸️ r0u3e Follow
being an islander be like "are those the kind of eggsplosions i should worry about or the kind of eggsplosions that are gonna repair our crops, fix the economy, and bring my dead grandma back to life"
🌁 eggpawnkindathicctho Follow
being a continenter be like "oh great what primordial diety has risen from the grave to block traffic and fight a 15yo today"
🥭 chao-official
being a chao be like "chao chao chao chao chao"
🌁 eggpawnkindathicctho Follow
you said it my mans
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🏵 sprinkles-the-chao Follow
hold on if sonic the hedgehog is jewish then how is he santa claus
🤖 e123-omegaverse Follow
dont question him
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☣️ sparkygoboom Follow
hey guys real question are human/mobian relationships problematic
💠 extremegayr Follow
op is about to start the anthro church schism of the fifteenth year all over again
🛞 mobotropolis Follow
ok but in all seriousness did your mom never teach you that part of history
🎢 marxiobros Follow
someone doesn't know about the united federations public school system
🛞 mobotropolis Follow
what the fuck is a public school
⏭️ drowningmusic Follow
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⚄ paradoxprism Follow
are we gonna talk about op's chaos radiation fetish
💠 extremegayr Follow
OP'S WHAT NOW
🏞 mobiancrossing Follow
ok but am i the only one who thinks that the public school system would be a good idea if handled right? like i know it's traditional to learn from your parents and then experience the world on our own from the ages of 7-13 but like combining all our knowledge and learning together doesnt seem like a bad idea
☠️ fabian-vane-number-1-hater Follow
bitch that's what the internet is for
🌅 s0leanna-apple-barrell
yeah where else am i gonna learn to make infinite chaos emeralds
❇️ freesurge Follow
"infinite chaos emeralds" that's called the phantom ruby
🏳️‍🌈 rainbowwispforgayrights Follow
everybody on this site has brain damage
❇️ freesurge Follow
yeah. from the radiation
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🐸 froggysfriend
caught this today
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🏝 digginginthegroundfortubers
if anything happens to this blog i genuinely hope eggman blows us all up as punishment
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🐊 teamchaotixofficial
Hey guys! Sorry to do this again but rent's a little tight this month :( If we've ever solved a case for you guys or made you guys smile, please consider sending a ko-fi our way! we just need a few rings to get through the month <3
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🖼 give-the-koco-a-gun Follow
do we ever talk about that time the sky turned blood-red and shadow the hedgehog's demon dad descended from on high to murder us all and we only barely survived
❤️‍🔥 songoose4evr Follow
shadow fixed it it's fine
🎮 n0cturnity
yeah that was like twelve apocalypses ago move on
🎆 robotniksbignaturals Follow
kinda wanted to bang black doom tbh
🖼 give-the-koco-a-gun Follow
THE DEVIL???? FROM THE BIBLE????
🎆 robotniksbignaturals Follow
yeah. move over gayboy i'm boutta be shadow's new dad
856,301 notes
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🗑️ berrybarry
starting a conspiracy that time hasnt moved since 2006
🗑️ berrybarry
why the fuck was i shadowbanned after posting this
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🤡 clownfinite Follow
tfw you finally save up enough rings for ice cream and you go outside and get hit by swatbot pieces and the rings just go fuckin everywhere
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🔷 sonicinthewild
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34,452 notes
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🌌 h-o-l-o-l-y-n-x
so did y'all see that genesis wave or was it just me
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🆙 planetsgiantcrack Follow
the virgin tweeter "if you use a bad word in the same tweet as the word 'cream' you get obliterated off the site" vs this chad site of "i want to put knuckles back in a microwave"
💟 presidentyaoi Follow
BACK????
69,849 notes
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⬜️ chao-and-wisps-4-ever-so-cute-2 Follow
ok posting my first fanart to this site pls be nice! <3
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🌔 emeraldfwuitgummy Follow
why does tails look like he's always about to say "it fucken WIMDY"
🦊 miles-prower-official
Hello, @emeraldfwuitgummy!
I actually quote that image on a constant basis! Sonic thinks it's hilarious every time. He's quite the fan of memes, and it's nice to get a laugh out of him!
Formally,
Dr. Miles "Tails" Prower, PHD
🌔 emeraldfwuitgummy Follow
SO WAS ANYONE GOING TO TELL ME THAT TAILS WAS ON THIS FUCKING SITE OR--
🏅 iwishhumanswerereal Follow
do. do you not know he created tailblr. dude it's in the name lmao
🌔 emeraldfwuitgummy Follow
he
WHAT
🍭 milfwisp Follow
didn't eggman invent this site???
🪫 veganswatbot
THE EGG ABANDONED SCRAMBLR IN ITS TIME OF NEED AND THE FOX RAISED US FROM THE ASHES. YOU WILL NOT DISRESPECT HIM
🦊 miles-prower-official
Hello, @milfwisp and @veganswatbot!
Very good question! This site was Eggman's until I ate his bones. Thank you for engaging! :D
Formally,
Dr. Miles "Tails" Prower, PHD
🌔 emeraldfwuitgummy Follow
YOU
WHAT
🌭 sonicsays
what's not clicking
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batmanisagatewaydrug · 9 months ago
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So I’m a minor (16 to be specific) and I frequently watch and read stuff with explicit sexual or 18+ content in it. I live in an extremely conservative Christian household and things like explicit fanfic are pretty much the only option I have for learning about sex that isn’t abstinence only. I do feel bad about it, especially when I see adults online say stuff like “oh i watched lots of inappropriate things as a teen that i really shouldn’t have” and it makes me feel like I’m ruining myself in a way that I won’t realize until I’m an adult? Right now I don’t see what the big deal is but i get the feeling that when i’m 24 or something I’ll wake up one day and be ashamed of this for some reason i’m not mature enough to know yet. Should I just stop and wait until I’m 18 to continue or what?
hi anon,
okay. I'm gonna hit you with something:
turning 18 does not actually change the way you feel about porn or sex or anything. the difference between being seventeen and 364 days and being 18 is nonexistent. there's not a magical switch that changes you as a person; that comes from lived experience. if you're 18 and your experience is still that porn and smut and what have you i something that you should feel bad about, it's still going to feel that way and a birthday won't change that.
look, the whole notion of "I saw [x] that I shouldn't have when I was young" is like. okay. so you saw something that was a little mature for you that you didn't quite get? awesome. did you die? no. most people's hangups about sexuality don't come from seeing a rogue titty when they were a teenager, they come from the culture that person was raised in that made seeing a rogue titty feel like something to be ashamed of instead of a completely natural part of life.
story time! when I teach my 4th-6th grade OWL classes (Our Whole Lives, great human development program) I always start by holding a meeting with the kids' parents. I've been doing this for seven years, and every time without fail some of the parents will recall seeing porn for the first time as a kid. these guys were kids when printed porn magazines were still a thing, so they were discovering them in all kinds of places - the bedrooms of their parents or their friends' parents, at bus stops, in the woods, once even stowed in some farm equipment. and they remember it feeling illicit and exciting, sure, and possibly making them confused or even horny for the first time in their young lives, but like... that's it. none of these people are irreparably damaged by seeing porn. in fact, they've grown up to be the kind of people who go out of their way to make sure their young kids are enrolled in a queer-friendly, body-positive, diversity-embracing sex ed class to counter stereotypes and misinformation they might receive elsewhere.
looking at things that arouse you is morally neutral. it can be a great way to help you learn about what turns you on, and even if it's not the best source of factual, realistic depictions of sex, it can still help you discover things - hell, I only figured out what the clitoris was by reading Young Justice fanfic (shout out Snaibsel).
you can't ruin yourself, at any age, with the media you like to consume. what makes you uncomfortable and anxious is the attitude you've been taught to have about that media, which is something that has to be actively unlearned, because it's certainly not going to just disappear on its own when you become a legal adult.
tl;dr obviously no one is making you watch porn and you shouldn't if it makes you uncomfortable, but if you drop it right now and come back when you're 18 don't expect to feel any different if you haven't done any more unpacking re: the conservative Christianity of it all.
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luveline · 3 months ago
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hey lovely!! can we maybe get some more pregnant bombshell and spencer??
“What I’ve decided,” you say, reclining back against Spencer’s lap with all the air of a resting empress, “is that I don’t actually like being pregnant.” 
Spencer startles, as does Hotch. JJ doesn’t flinch. “It’s awful,” she says. 
You’re too pregnant to terminate the pregnancy, now. Thirty weeks, your stomach a bump you pretend doesn’t exist when you aren’t holding a hand to it. “I love my baby,” you say, letting Spencer relax again underneath you, “but this is inhumane.” 
“It’s one of the most human experiences you could ever live through,” Spencer says. People have been having babies since the beginning of time. 
“I wonder if you’d feel that way if you were the pregnant one.” You slip further down into his lap, shuffling across the jet’s couch to let your head rest on his thigh. Your chin tips up, your lips curling into a painted smile. He could kiss every bit of lipstick off of your mouth if you didn’t have an audience. 
“I just mean, it’s intrinsically human to reproduce. Not that your feelings aren’t real. Sorry.” 
“Ooh, sorry,” you mumble, giving him a playful, almost daring smirk. “Doghouse for you, handsome. You know you’re supposed to agree to everything I say.” 
“I know.” 
“Is it hard?” Hotch asks. Not unaware that it is, in fact, very hard, but probing you to open up further should you want to. Spencer probably should’ve asked you first, he thinks. He holds your face in apology. 
“Hotch, it’s like… It’s hard because it doesn’t stop. Sometimes I don’t notice, I don’t feel any different, but when I’m nauseous or when it’s barely five and my back aches like I’ve been carrying a dumbbell all day… I don’t know.” 
“It’s alright to not enjoy it,” Spencer says. “You don’t have to think it’s fun. You can hate every second of it, if you want.” 
“I don’t. Really, I don’t. Just tired.” 
“You could be in the field less,” Hotch suggests. 
You cover your eyes with your hand. “Don’t suggest big things to me.” 
“It’s up to you when you want to stop. But don’t think you can’t take a break. Even if next week you want to come back.” Hotch smiles. “After all, you’re the brains of the operation. You can consult through video, like Penelope.” 
You laugh at being called the brains, stretching your legs out, stockings shining down the lengths of you like they’ve suffered a sudden rain. “It’s not about being tired. I’m exhausted, but it’s just strange sometimes, that’s all. I don’t always feel like me.” 
Spencer lets his hand fall to your chest, rubbing a short line under your collar he hopes is soothing.
“It’s the emotional aspect too,” JJ says. “All the hormones.” 
“Yeah, it is,” you say. 
Spencer hears the unhappiness threaded in your tone, but he’s not sure what to do. Hotch and JJ realise you’re done talking for now and return to their own devices, a new quiet descending over the jet, the only sound the rush and hum of air. Spencer keeps on rubbing that same spot over your chest. Your eyes close. He knows you too well to think you’re sleeping. 
“Are you really unhappy?” he asks quietly. 
“No, Spence. Didn’t mean it like that.” 
“I know. It’s alright if you aren’t happy.” 
“I’m mostly happy.” 
“I want you to be a hundred percent happy.”
“I don’t think I can be right now.” 
He lets his pinky dip under the neckline of your shirt. Your skin is soft. “Okay. Don’t be happy if you can’t be. I’m here no matter what.” 
You sigh softly and twist on your side, your nose pressing into his stomach, the heat of your breath slowly transferring through his shirt to his skin. Spencer brings his hand around with you, holding the back of your neck as you make yourself comfortable. 
“I love you, I swear,” you whisper. “And her.” 
“I know it’s not about love. Pregnancy can be an evil, heavy, horrible thing to go through. Don’t feel like you have to pretend it’s not. There’s gestational diabetes, morning sickness, high blood pressure, night sweats, depression…” Spencer ducks down to press his cheek briefly to your temple. “If you liked all that, there’d be something wrong with you. There’s nothing wrong with how you feel, okay?” 
“Okay.” You kiss his shirt. 
“Massage?” he offers. 
“Yes!” You wriggle closer to him and shiver happily as his hand finds the knot between your shoulders. “That’s a pro for this whole ordeal. You could open a massage parlour with hands like that. They’d call it Reid’s Reflexology.” 
“Yeah? Is that a hint for a foot massage?” 
You giggle like you’ve been tickled. JJ groans in her seat with reluctant fondness, while Hotch murmurs, “Let’s keep it PG-13, please.” 
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screampied · 11 months ago
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can you please please write manhandling & squirting w gojo :(
❤︎ ໋𓈒 telling your best friend satoru that you can’t make yourself squirt
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warnings. fem! reader, manhandling, praise, fingering, talking you through it, rev cowgirl, dirty talk, squírting, mdni.
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legs sprawled, toes all curled up, you were desperately trying to make yourself squirt. it’s never happened to you and you wanted to experience what it was like—you read through various erotic stories of how it feels way different than just your everyday ordinary orgasm. with your teeth softly digging against your bottom lip, your fingers gently rummage throughout and against your clit. after a while though, you end up sighing—on the verge of giving up before as if on literal cue, your best friend gojo opens the door.
“hey, is it any more . . oh! uh,” he’d murmur, walking in on you with your legs sprawled all open. gojo suppresses a giggle that was about to escape from his lips before he utters. “. . . should i come back another time? you seem busy.”
there was smugness dripping underneath his tone and you were far too aroused to feel embarrassed. “no,” you puff. “i need help, satoru.”
“yeahh you seem like it,” he snickers. running a hand through his hair, he hums to himself before his eyes avert towards your lazily slid to the side panties. “is that what you call fingering yourself?”
“. . . shut up,” you chastise, and his sly smirk only widens. gojo stares at you for a long while before inching closer towards you—plopping down beside you. the mattress jolts a bit from his weight and he cocks his head to the left in pure amusement. “i need help. i can’t … i can’t squirt.”
gojo sneers. “oh, you sure can. you just don’t know what the fuck you’re doing, angel, heh.”
he had such a smart mouth, the dramatically frustrated sigh that deserts past your lips was too adorable—in his eyes at least.
the way you were so dedicated to making yourself have a proper finish was so cute . . but you couldn’t, you needed his help—you wanted his help.
“hm but okay,” he shrugs with a cheeky grin, getting right beside you. gojo lightly grabs your wrist, peering at how you’d already soak two of your digits with sloppy amounts of slick before he titters. “aw, poor thing. these useless fingers just can’t do shit, huh?”
“just fucking help me.” you grouse at him, a pouty scowl ceasing against your lips firmly.
“fine, girl fine,” he rolls his eyes. “i’ll take it from here.”
and he does because once he starts to ‘help’ you, it’s in a way that has you merely speechless.
with your neck slightly whirling towards the left, you’re mindlessly bouncing up at down on his thick cock. you’re faced the opposite way, your back leans up against his chest. gojo holds you up with no problem, a brief squeeze on your thighs and you start to whimper at how close his fat tip thwacks against a particularly sensitive spot.
“f— fuckk, ‘toru,” you’d whimper out, feeling him reach the deep components inside of you.
so deliciously good, you felt a few droplets of your own saliva trickle past your lips as you slump back against him. “so deep, stuffin’ me f— full, ‘toru.”
“. . . hah,” he pants heavily, tensed abs flexing each time he drags you up and down. he’s treating you like a rag doll. you didn’t expect him to do all this, having you all up and down. although, who were you to complain—he was reaching every spot without an ounce of trouble. “guess i can reach better than those fingers ever could, hm angel?”
“y—yes, yesss,” you stammer, your voice all shaky, trembling on each syllable that you spat out. “satoru, harder. fuck me, f—fuckkk me.”
you repeat the same words out your spit-glossed lips. with such a firm grip, he’s making your hips slam up and down—such a rigorous rhythm…
you try to grind a bit against him but you only end up slouching against his bare chest. it was simply no secret, gojo was known to be lengthy, longer than thick when it came to his cock. every orifice, he makes sure to locate every spot inside of your gummy walls with the crown of his shaft.
gush after gush, you’re spasming on him and you make a cute attempt at grabbing his wrist, clammy hands piercing into his skin. “s-so good, more ‘toru. right there, pleaseee . . !”
“i got ya.” he huffs, warm breaths waft right up against your earlobe. he’s holding you in place, each time he bounces you up again and again.
your eyes do that cute thing where it rolls all the way back into your cranium. it’s cute, lewd . . but cute.
with your pretty pupils dilated, all you see is nothing but pure splotches of white. his cock’s buried so deep that you’re stuck in a trance, a trance you never wanted to escape from.
“. . . awww,” he purrs against your ear, a big hand softly cupping your chin. he feels some of your translucent spit pour down the sides of your lips before smearing it over your mouth with his thumb. “such a messy baby. you feel it comin’ don’t you?” he teases, nipping a kiss near your neck once you squeeze his wrist a tad bit tighter. “oh. you want me to hold your hand, is that it?”
“sato—ru,” you whine, a cute trembly voice making a special appearance.
but oh, the stretch…
it was so good simply divine.
each second is spent with gojo’s dick delving into your clenched walls. a syrupy ear ringing whimper snatches right out of your throat before you speak once more, “satoru, ‘toru, s—satoru.”
“hey, that’s me,” he grunts with a coy grin, feeling how well you clamp down on him—of course, he’d make a joke out of nearly anything. you’re like a bobbling doll, feeling your cunt squeeze him tight before within seconds, your thighs began to quaver.
with your legs quavering, it was as if a volcano was preparing to erupt. violently, your legs start to tense and you’re steadily pulsing and pulsing. something’s coming and it’s coming fast…
it had to be exactly what you were thinking. it felt a bit different though. pressure presses down against you and you feel gojo’s fingers intertwine with yours. “heh, you’re kinda dramatic, huh?” he teases—and right before he can give you another snarky reply, he brings your hips to an abrupt halt. teeth chomping down together, your jaw insignificantly tightens and you feel a certain sharp twinge for at least three and a half seconds.
“i- i’m about to s-squirt, ‘toru,” you warn him, and he nips another chaste kiss near the crook of your neck.
“nuh uh. you’re going to squirt, trust me. give it to me, yeah. grind against me ‘n just listen to my voice, mhm.”
his voice.. just the way he spoke to you in such a playfully deep tone was enough to make you finish on the spot.
gojo holds you still. he’s still buried deep inside. stuffing you fill of hefty inches before he brings a hand towards your swollen puffy entrance. “damn, she really is so fuckin’ sloppy,” he grunts, starting to maneuver slow circles against your pussy. he makes haste with it though, and your lips part before moaning once you even hear the evidence yourself.
squelch, squelch, squelch..
it’s loud, it rings throughout your ears—each time, it’s louder than the next. he’s so sloppy with it too, no shame whatsoever. gojo then drags a soft thumb down your slit that was just sopping. everything felt so fervent - the way he’d strum his fingers against your cunt, only to then give it a concise spank.
“s-satoru, fuckkk.” you’d gasp, leaning way back with your legs still sprawled, “i—”
“now—don’t be rude, angel. she’s tryna speak to me, let her do her thing, baby,” and he clearly referring to your dripping wet pussy. he continues, rubbing against your clit at a much more rapid speed now. your legs could barely hold themselves open. mouth twitching, you feel a rupture on the very brink of rippling out of you before his spanks against your pussy come again, and again, and again…
“sloppy girl with a sloppy … fuckin’ … cunt.”
his words get more raspy and degrading and he’s way too into it to pause. with a thumb slowly tickling against your spasming nub, he watches at you moan a shrieking whine before not even seconds later, it happens. you gush out, and it’s a lot to where you even dampen gojo’s lap. thankfully he was prepared, keeping a towel underneath you just in case you were a bit too much of a soaked.
and soaked you were, it felt so good that you didn’t even know what to say… more like, you didn’t know what to think.
your mind was blank, equivalent to an empty canvas. he’s so mean, whispering such filthy murmurs into your ear before he lets you ride out your orgasm.
wet, you felt that entire word right between your legs. gojo’s still playing with you, cock stuffing your pussy full to the very brim before he feels you bare around him.
“. . seeeee,” he pants, humming in a soft tune.
he squeezes your folds tighter just to hear that honeyed mewl rip from your sweet lips. he gradually pulls out and now you’re just laying back against his chest with the dumbest expression. “told ya you didn’t know what the fuck you were doing,” he chaffs before making you turn your neck, dragging you into a deep kiss.
it catches you by surprise, you connect your lips against his and that’s when he makes you fall back. you watch with glossy eyes before he then grabs ahold of chin with one hand, brushing it tenderly against your skin. “say ah, open that pretty mouth for me ‘n taste what a messy girl you are.”
you felt your heartbeat go straight between your legs. once you loll out your tongue for him, staring right into his bright cerulean irises, he stuffs your mouth with two fingers. the same fingers that were covered in nothing but your sweet wet arousal. “yeah, run that tongue around my fingers ‘n taste it all, baby.”
you moan, swirling your tongue alongside his digits before you briefly end up gagging at the tips of his fingers massaging against the very back part of your throat.
“good girl,” he whispers—pulling his fingers out real slowly, he does this purposeful. a sheeny trail of your glistening saliva follows out from your lips before he gives you another long kiss before departing. “now, let’s do it again. but this time,” he utters, making you lie back against your back. “i’ll make you squirt just from my tongue, angel. let’s make that cute squirt velocity a little stronger, hm?”
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multimilfs · 5 months ago
Text
Agatha Harkness x Fem!Reader x Rio Vidal: The Prize
Summary: Agatha has been fighting to reclaim her prize from Rio for a long time.
AO3
Included: dark themes, lesbian drama & yearning, near-death experiences, smut; biting, orgasm denial, praise kink, degradation, s&m, blood, fingering, cunnilingus, use of pet names, begging
Words: 9.7k
Tag List: @multifandomfix @ghostsunderstoodmysoul @escapetodreamworld @white--lillies @imtrashinflames
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1750
Glowing hands press over the seeping wound, magic swirling around them, diving inside. There’s no satisfaction of watching the flesh knit itself back together. Instead, your magic drifts right back out like smoke. 
Oh Goddess. 
“Do take your time.” Agatha snaps, voice strained, “I have absolutely no plans.” 
Five types of poison are immune to tangible magic. You know antidotes for three. Staring hard at the wound, you look for the blackened edges consistent with Nightrot, finding the flesh as red and irritated as to be expected. Is it swelling or screaming that goes with Alewife’s Revenge? A glance up at her face finds it normal. Her lips are pursed. 
Your hands shake, one hovering over the open wound in her middle, the other clutching your head. Remembering has never mattered more so why is your mind empty? Pieces of information slip through your fingers like sand. Dozens of cadavers, hundreds of hours of study; useless. 
Unable to rely on your memory, you scramble across the floor for the dagger that’d flown from the wall. The little light coming from the boarded windows prompts the metal to glint. The edge of the blade is sticky with blood, beneath it a metallic sheen that can only be a witches poison. You hold it up to the slant of light to see the color. 
“Are you out of your mind? Heal me!” 
You drop the dagger the second the poison glints purple. You slap your hand over your mouth, panic beginning to course through your veins; the body’s own special brand of poison. 
How are you going to tell her?
“I’m trying!” You snap, voice breaking. 
It’s a cruel joke that the poison should be so well matched to the witch bearing its effects. You stare at the edge as it rocks from being dropped, your stomach turning when the color doesn’t change. If only you could be wrong this once. 
Were you a lesser witch, you’d curl in a little ball and quail under the weight of your failures. The idea is seductive. Yet, you turn to Agatha where she lies, pale and sweating on the floorboards. The pallor of her skin makes you whimper. 
“Agatha,” You start, your voice holding just enough, “it’s Saura’s Dread.” 
Things click into place behind her eyes despite the glazed-over look to them. She fights to find a way out of this, but you know well that the reality cannot be avoided. 
“Give it to me. You’re wrong.” 
“I know poisons better than most.” You hand the dagger over anyway. 
“That’s not saying much.” 
The comment stings, but you let it slide off you. You cannot give into petty squabbles now. With so little time to find a solution, you have to focus. 
She stares hard at the blade as if willing it to change. 
“Brew the antidote.” 
“I can’t.” You whisper. 
There’s a flicker of something in her gaze that looks suspiciously like rage. Your own internal fire leaps to meet it; of all the emotions to look upon you with—rage? As if this is your fault? You’re not the one that dragged her into this old cabin, intent on sifting through the contents. 
It’s not your fault. You know that as the truth. Yet, shame floods you. 
“You’re a healer.” Agatha spits, “What good are you if you don’t know the antidote?” 
“Someone didn’t let me stay with my coven long enough to learn it!” 
“The next time someone tries to keep you from me, I’ll let them.” 
The fire in your chest ebbs. An old argument at an inconvenient time. There will be no rough makeup sex following this argument, no unspoken apologies in Agatha’s kisses. All the time, all the bodies; they cannot be for nothing. They mean too much. 
Fleetingly, you feel pity for your old coven. In their minds they had attempted to do the right thing. Keeping you from Agatha must have seemed reasonable. But you remember how many bodies they made, how pleased it made Her. 
Saura’s Dread takes its victim within six hours. This, you know confidently. The demise is slow and painful, a poison intended for torture. You can’t stand to see Agatha in this kind of pain. You’re not ready for her to be just another body.
“I’m calling Her.” You say. 
“No.” Agatha counters, “She’ll never let me live it down.” 
“You won’t live down anything if you’re dead, Agatha.” 
“I won’t die.” 
She’s an idiot. 
Magic flowing into your fingertips, you trace familiar symbols on the floor. They glow bright and then dim as they wait. Around your neck sits an old, jagged bone, tied by a thread; you use the end of said bone to split your palm and drip blood over the symbols. 
Agatha’s mouth is moving, but you don’t listen. You mutter the incantation in latin under your breath. The words—old and comforting—curl your tongue in ways that you’ve only known between two pairs of legs. You end the incantation with the key that gets you around the waiting list; Her name, Her true name. 
There’s a blinding flash of light and a puff of fog, but the symbols contain it. You catch the glint of white teeth. 
“You rang?” 
Rio smiles, clad in darkness and bone and that same beauty that always stops you in your tracks. Upon seeing her, you breathe easier.
“We need your help.” 
“You wouldn’t have called so formally if it was quality time you wanted.” Amusement dances in her eyes. 
She eyes the symbols on the floor. They no longer glow, but still they contain her. She scuffs a foot along them. 
You smudge the symbols and the containment drops. Stepping over the magic as it sinks down into the earth, she catches you by the waist and devours you; lips and teeth and tongue dominating your own, leaving you helpless to do anything but give in. And you’re all too willing to do so. 
When she pulls back, you’re breathless. Somewhere in the fray your lip has begun to bleed. Rio soothes her tongue over the wound and you feel it close. 
“Hand.” 
You offer the demanded appendage, palm up. She places a kiss in the center and licks the blood from her lips. 
Rio turns her head to where Agatha has dragged herself to sit against the wall. The rise and fall of her chest is slow, but there. She glares at the two of you. You flush while Rio grins. 
“Hi, sweetheart. You look like shit.” Rio says, delighted. 
“A side effect.” Agatha grits out, “The same can’t be said for you.” 
Rio tilts her head back and laughs. It’s deep and rich and fills you with thoughts that are not appropriate for this situation. The hand on your waist squeezes as if she knows. Then, she releases you. 
She crosses to crouch before Agatha, devious smile shifting to something softer. One of her hands works through a lock of Agatha’s hair, brushing it out of her face. 
“What did you get yourself into?” 
Agatha’s eyes drop to Rio’s lips, but she stays silent. 
“Saura’s Dread.” You choke out, shame winding itself tight inside you, “I don’t—I can’t brew the antidote.” 
You should have done more to push off Agatha’s agenda; just so you would have finished your research. A few extra days wouldn’t have hurt. They would’ve infuriated Agatha—and Rio by extension—but then you would know the solution instead of watching her slowly wither away. 
Rio doesn’t look away from Agatha, but you know the soothing tone is for you, “It’s okay.” 
Something passes between the two that you miss. One moment, Rio holds Agatha’s face in her hand, while Agatha—hesitantly—leans into the contact. The next Rio is standing between the two of you, toying with her knife, all business. 
You feel a chill pass through you at the unfamiliar territory; staring into Rio’s eyes and finding the affection buried away. It stings more than knowing how you’ve failed. 
“You’re asking me for life in a bottle.” Rio says, grinning, “What do I get in return?”
Short of knowing that Rio would fix it should you ask, you find yourself shamefully bereft of anything with value. You search the space for anything to bargain with. Agatha’s eyes should be looking at you with knowing, but her gaze doesn’t leave Rio. 
When Agatha tilts her head and grins, turning on the bedroom eyes, you pause. 
“What you’ve wanted for years.” Agatha says, “Brew me a little potion and you can have her all to yourself.” 
Rio’s brows shoot sky high. You tilt your head, then freeze. It’s you. Agatha’s bargaining you.
There should be a sweetness in knowing you’re the only thing of value she has to offer, yet the taste is sour on your tongue. The words feel like a punishment, a reprimand—and not the kind you’ve begged at her feet for. That awful part of you would rather Agatha die than ever willingly give you up and Rio eyes you as if she knows it. Does it please her to know how they’ve twisted you?
One mistake, you think bitterly, and Agatha throws in the towel. Despite all the near-death experiences you’ve endured at her side. Despite the years you’ve spent together. You never expected a punishment of this proportion. 
You bite your tongue. At your sides, your fists clench and unclench. They glow with the anger you can’t keep hidden. 
Pride rears its unhelpful head and you speak before you can stop to think, “My life for Agatha’s.” 
Rio’s full attention is on you, then. Her eyes are bright. 
You speak directly to her, “I’m bound to you and The Road until such time as Agatha traverses it to collect me.” 
Had you not been so focused on Rio, you would have noticed Agatha flinch at your suggestion. Her wide, glassy eyes stare at you. You do not give her the satisfaction of your attention. If she is going to be cruel, so can you. 
Your terms are a challenge; and Agatha doesn’t turn down a challenge. 
Her devious, wicked mask clicks back into place. Rio’s expression is pensive. Despite the poison working through her system, Agatha almost looks as powerful as her best day. 
“You’d let me steal her away, O Death?” Agatha teases. 
The comment is salt in your open wound. You glare, wishing more than anything that you could wrap your hands around her pretty neck and squeeze. You want her not only to beg—but to apologize. 
But Rio’s eyes haven’t left you for a second. 
“Alright, sweetheart.” Rio says, “Your life, bound to mine, until Agatha comes to get you.” 
In it you understand the desire you both share; to have Agatha, one way or another. You wonder if the desire for possession is your own or something you’ve learned from her. 
From her pocket comes a small glass vial. She tosses it to Agatha, who only barely catches it. She cradles it like something precious. 
“Drink up.” Rio orders. 
Then Rio is there, arm around your waist, holding all your pieces together. You lean into her comfort as color returns to Agatha’s cheeks. 
“Te veo.” 
--
1754
“She waits for you.”
Agatha whips around, purple crackling at her fingertips. At the edge of the clearing, Rio leans her weight against a gnarled tree, eyeing the withered husks of once-witches in the grass with interest. She looks almost predatory. 
“Does she?” 
Rio nods, eyes shifting to Agatha, “Like a puppy. It’s almost pathetic.” 
It is pathetic, is what she should say. Time and affection have curbed her tongue on this small thing at least. On you. Agatha’s smile is knowing. 
Rio has pulled her punches toward you since the beginning. Agatha’s never minded. It’s almost sweet watching the oldest force in the multiverse tiptoe around a witch barely into her second century. Is it that craving for ancient knowledge in your veins that renders Rio down, or is it simply your pretty face? 
Does it matter? 
“I don’t have what I need yet.” Agatha rolls her eyes, “Witches these days don’t have the power they used to.” 
“Or maybe you’re leveling the population before they have time to strengthen.” Rio raises a brow. 
Agatha thinks, deliberately dramatic, then shrugs, “No, that’s not it.” 
With a shake of her head, Rio steps out from the treeline, and closes the distance across the clearing. Agatha watches every step with dark eyes. The stench of death and magic sends a chill down Rio’s spine; there’s nothing more delicious than a life snuffed out. 
The wind slows in the trees as if sensing her. Birds silence their sweet tunes. There is frantic rustling in the trees somewhere as creatures do all they can to get away. 
Yet Agatha stands, waiting, and allows Death to pull her into her embrace. 
One of Rio’s great loves is watching skin split so she can lap up the blood at her own pace. Yet, when her hands settle on Agatha’s hips, they’re gentle. She doesn’t open wounds with her teeth. Rather, she moves her lips over Agatha’s until she can’t breathe. Agatha is wary when she pulls back. 
Rio shrugs, “A message from her.” 
“I see. Forgiven me, has she?” A slow, taunting grin, “Anything from you?” 
“Have you earned it?” 
“These bodies didn’t make themselves.”
A tilt of her head, as if considering, “Maybe you’ve earned something small, then.” 
And they meet in a clash of lips and teeth. Rio’s hands are everywhere, leaving behind deep claw marks that make Agatha moan into her mouth. Agatha’s own nails pierce through cloth and skin at her hips but draw no blood. She tries to push Rio backward toward one of the trees, she just needs a little leverage and Rio’s thigh to—
Rio pulls back. She grins something wicked at the flash of Agatha’s purple.
“Something small.”
Agatha makes a face, batting her lashes. Rio doesn’t give in. 
“You’re awful.”
“You love it.” Rio says, then her face takes on something more serious, “Don’t keep her waiting, Agatha.”
Then she’s gone as if she was never there; the only evidence being the bleeding marks on her skin. Agatha stares at where she stood for a long time before moving on.
--
1801
The Road changes, you’ve seen, as the covens come along. Small cottages, ancient ruins—the most interesting was an old system of catacombs, though it lacked the remains you’d been intent on studying.
Your favorite, though, is the bower, absent of any illusions or spells.
Beneath a canopy of purple leaves upon a seat of grass, you watch the events unfold from afar. An old curved trunk sits at your back keeping you upright. The animals—lost familiars, mostly—wander up to you here, nibbling at fallen leaves and taking up residence in your lap.
From outside it could be mistaken for a simple tree. Yet, beneath it, the world is at your fingertips. The position of your place presents the underside of millions of glowing leaves to your view; lives, Rio said, witch and non-witch alike.
You find the one you love best among the foliage. You trace your finger down the purple veins, hoping she feels you, thinks of you, misses you. The veins seem to glow a little brighter at your touch.
Rio doesn’t enjoy you toying with them; worried a wrong move on your part will take a life too soon, upsetting the greater balance she’s beholden to. But she taught you how to handle Agatha’s. Trace, never prod. Caress, but never pluck.
A black cat settles in your lap and you sit straighter.
Soothing a hand down her back, she purrs. Her little body presses against your stomach and basks in your warmth.
“You really are too predictable.” Rio says.
She stands a few feet away, clad in dirt and muck, yet still beautiful. Always beautiful.
“I like it here. It’s comforting.”
“You like being close to Agatha.” She corrects.
The leaf in question glows brighter as if sensing the mention. You trace a finger along the edge, willing all your love into it.
“This is all I have of her.” You admit.
Something like softness creeps into Rio’s face. As soon as it appears, it recedes. She joins you under the canopy. The cat in your lap startles and leaps from your lap, darting back into the underbrush.
You had never thought to secure some token of Agatha’s, then. Now, with nothing of her’s to hold close, you settle for her life-line, begging it to tell you her whereabouts and if she’s safe; it is always silent. Rio is, too. She doesn’t mention much when you ask, though you know she knows the actions of every life tied to her.
The Road is a wonderful home. Rio is an attentive partner. But you ache, still, for the other set of hands you knew; those who were predictable in their firmness, balancing the sudden changes of Rio’s own.
“You’re crying.” Rio says.
Her face is dark, but fury lingers around the edges. Something like worry flutters in and out of her eyes. You have nothing to say, so you only nod.
Then you’re in her lap. Rio’s bunching up your dress to your waist, canines embedded in your neck. Her nails dig into your hips and the blood warms you. You whimper.
Lips kiss down your neck while a hand hovers between your legs. You bear down, desperate for any friction to dull the ache. And she gives it to you. Her hand is exactly where you want it, fingers rubbing and pressing, and you grind your hips hard, harder until you’re right there.
And then her hand is gone.
You whine. Your hips move of their own volition, searching for that pressure to send you right over the edge. Rio’s lips catch your own in a bruising kiss and you whimper into her mouth.
Needy, desperate, you can almost hear her say.
But when she pulls away and digs her nails in harder, she whispers, “Cry for me, sweetheart.”
She alternates between giving you what you crave and rescinding it for hours. You whimper, moan, and beg. She laughs and repeats herself—cry for me. You lose count of how many almost-orgasms tighten your body just to go unfulfilled. You do cry. You sob and she’s there, tongue licking up your tears and knuckle deep inside you, thumbing over your clit until you have what you want.
You’re not sure how long you lay there, after, crying against her.
--
1833
Rio’s arm is warm where you’re wrapped around it. She leads you through the winding stone streets, around grand buildings with stained-glass windows. Some of the scenes depicted in the glass are beautiful, simple; but the majority are Catholic in nature, dripping with sadness and guilt. You shake your head.
Passersby nod or tilt their hats, but don’t seem to see you. Their eyes go especially glassy when they look at Rio.
Whereas you’re clad in a dress of rich layered fabric, Rio has opted for more masculine attire. The low heels of her dress shoes click upon the stone. The unwrinkled fabric of her suit smells of smoke.
Your heels don’t quite agree with the stone. After the fifth time of a near-twisted ankle, you huff, “Could I not have worn flat shoes?”
“The heels compliment your legs.”
“You can’t even see them.”
“Yet.” She winks.
You roll your eyes, ignoring the heat suffusing your cheeks. Another nod to a passing couple and Rio makes a sharp turn. You’re led into a damp, dim alleyway.
The ground is made from rough slabs of uneven stone. You curse when your heel slips and only Rio’s strength keeps you standing. Water slides down the walls on either side, thick moss growing in the cracks. You reach out to feel it only for your hand to come away red.
If not for Rio pulling you along, you’d have screamed. Blood cascades down the walls. From it grow dark, twisted plants you’ve studied beside The Road. Beneath the plants and out of them come bones; most have yellowed with age, but there is the occasional bright-white specimen.
Surprise aside, you lean toward the bones with interest. Still, Rio presses on.
The alleyway is growing slimmer by the second. Should it continue to do so, you’ll be forced to walk behind Rio, and the thought makes you tense.
Rio squeezes your hand, “Relax, sweetheart.”
“I’d relax more if I knew what we were doing here.”
“Where’s the fun in that?”
Before you’re forced to walk single-file, you come to the end. Rio traces a counter-sigil upon the stone. With a shudder, a door is revealed. Above the silver knocker, embedded in the door, sits an unblinking eyeball. The blue pierces you.
Rio pulls and slams the knocker. The eyeball falls from the door and hits the ground with a sickening pop. You nearly shriek while Rio makes noises of delight.
“Ooh,” She chuckles, “we’re not the first to arrive.”
You try not to think about what the eye must look like now, “Can I go home?”
“Why so squeamish all of a sudden? You handle the cadavers I bring you just fine.”
“That’s different. That’s research.”
“Who says this isn’t, sweetheart?”
The door opens soundlessly. Inside, the scene is much the same; another dark, slim space, though notably absent of plants and body parts. The owner of this place must be allergic to candles, the lighting situation is just pathetic.
Rio waits. When you make no move to walk inside, she sighs, nudging you with a hand on your lower back, “Ladies first.”
You’re not sure if being first or last is the worst. If anything is to jump from the walls now, you’ll take the brunt of it; you’re reminded of that day with Agatha all those years ago. Rio’s warmth at your back offers the strength you need to continue. Though, you do cling to her hand the whole way.
The hallway empties into a full room. Dark shelves match the height of the walls, on them jars full of ingredients. There are tables boasting dozens of drawers, though none sit open. Glasses and tools and cauldrons line the tabletops. In the center of it all are two figures; well, one figure and one corpse.
You can’t catch your breath. She’s as beautiful as the day you lost her.
“Agatha.” You whisper.
Agatha turns and smirks. She doesn’t look nearly as surprised to see you as you do her. Upon seeing you, her expression softens, eyes full of affection and longing. It hardens a bit when she glances behind you.
“You ruined the surprise.” Rio says, arms crossed, though one motions to the corpse, “We needed her.”
“What could you possibly need with a poison witch?”
“Our darling healer wanted to study with her.”
Something like regret turns Agatha’s face when she regards you. With a wave, she produces a thick book full of yellowing pages. You tilt your head when she offers it to you.
“Her life’s work. I’m sure there’s more here somewhere.” Agatha shrugs.
You take it and hold it to your chest reverently. All this time you thought Rio was putting you off about finding a competent poison witch and yet here you are, standing in her apothecary. She lies dead on the floor but you couldn’t care less when the real gift stands before you.
You long for her. You ache to feel the gentle caress of her hands on your face, the threat of her nails on your scalp.
A look at Rio tells you she isn’t entirely pleased with the turn of events. Yet when she sees your excitement some of her ire dissipates. The yearning in your eyes must be plain, since she gives you a single nod.
Book of poisons tossed onto the tabletop, you throw yourself into Agatha’s arms. She’s as steady as you remember. Her hand grips your chin and forces your lips to hers. Her hands are predictably firm wherever they land. She grips you as if afraid you’ll slip away. But her kiss, oh gods her kiss; soft lips and taunting, sharp tongue. The length of her body pressed against your own and so warm.
There are hands in your hair and this is all you’ve wanted—all you’ve craved for years. Why, then, do you feel the urge to cry? To rip the heart from your chest and banish it to where it won’t hurt?
Agatha is warm and steady. You bury your face in her neck and her in yours. Your hands shake with the force of clinging to her.
The feeling is bliss. Yet, it isn’t complete.
You glance over Agatha’s shoulder to Rio. She stands in the doorway, watching the scene with dark-eyed interest; but there’s a weariness in the set of her shoulders.
“Beloved.” You call, holding one of your hands out to her.
Rio raises a brow. Her eyes don’t stray from your outstretched hand.
“This is your gift, sweetheart.”
“And it’s incomplete without you.”
Her eyes stray to Agatha, who has taken to watching her, too. This time, Agatha’s eyes don’t harden. They maintain that soft look you melt for.
Agatha extends her own hand alongside yours.
“Come on.” Agatha urges, soft.
You watch the resolve break moments before she wedges her way into your embrace. Her fingers lace through yours, but her face is pressed into Agatha’s neck. She pushes and nuzzles like she wants to become part of her. It reminds you of the cat that visits the bower—Ebony—but you don’t dare say so.
Agatha’s hands leave you to caress Rio’s face. A thumb rubs along her cheekbone. You press yourself against Rio’s back, unable to glimpse her face but sure of the longing in her expression.
In a perfect world, there would be no separation between the three of you. No clothes, no emotional barriers, not even flesh to keep your hearts from mingling into one. You settle for Rio’s hand in your own and Agatha’s blue eyes locked on you.
You lean over Rio’s shoulder and kiss Agatha, your free hand fumbling with getting into the former’s pants. She chuckles darkly in your ear. It ignites a spark in your chest; a dangerous longing for this to remain, to be always. You try to push it away and focus on how Rio moans in your ear instead.
--
1869
“Will you walk with me?”
Rio nods, smiles grandly, “Of course.”
You laugh. She holds out her arm, ever the picture of a gentleman, but you lace your fingers through hers instead.
As a rare treat, you lead. You pull her along the road. The leaves change beneath your feet, from silver and black to the hues of autumn and then to pure green. The Road opens its arms into a clearing bathed in the color. Only the stone building in the center stands apart.
Upon your approach, flowers grow in the flattened grass where you step; honeysuckle and heliotrope, baby’s breath and red chrysanthemum. Rio glances over her shoulder as the blooms spring forth.
Ivy grows up the walls of the building. You brush a gentle hand over the leaves.
Crumbling, worn headstones en masse wait behind the building. 
Rio tilts her head, “What is this?”
The door is unlocked. You knew it would be. The Road cannot keep you from this place. 
Inside is warm and hazy. Papers with elegant scrawl cover every surface, books half-open litter any free spaces. Shelves line the walls, jars bearing various specimens. Plush couches overflow with deep, red cushions, begging you to sit and stay. A fire cracks in the fireplace.
Rio turns this way and that. She wanders around the room, flipping through books. A fingernail taps against a jar full of eyes. An errant paper is plucked from where it sits haphazardly atop the mantle. She stops.
You know the paper the second she comes into contact with it; can remember the way you wax poetic about how beautiful she is, how safe you feel in her arms. She picks another, then another, so on, and you know every word the second she touches them; the way she unwinds in Agatha’s arms, her face twisted in perfect fury, the lightless turn of her eyes when she teeters on the edge of wickedness.
She looks at you, vulnerable and unsure, “What is this?”
“My heart.”
“That… then why is all of this here?”
Her hand shakes the papers for emphasis. You resist the urge to laugh, lest she think you’re making light of her. Death can be cruel, but you try not to be.
You step close. Gently, the papers are extracted and returned to their places. Rio stares and hardly breathes as you take your face in her hands.
“You pulled away after that night.” You whisper, finger tracing her cupids-bow, “Do you think I touch you only because it is convenient?”
Rio’s lip curls. Fists bunch at her side, crackling with green light. You feel the rumble of her anger working through her chest. She tries to pull from your hold, but you don’t let her.
“Do you think I kiss you and pretend it’s her?”
Rio snarls, “I will kill you if you don’t stop talking.”
You smile. The threat is a real one, but you don’t fear it; the outcome is remaining by her side. With one hand you reach and pull one of her fists between you. You unravel it, trying not to flinch against the bursts of power over her skin. You press the palm of her hand over where your heart resides inside your chest.
The snarl fades just so. Fury still lingers in her eyes. You press your hand over hers and will her to see, to know.
“Look at the walls.” You order.
Upon the walls, plain and dark, shimmering scrawl appears. Agatha Harkness, it reads in shaky lettering; like a name carved into a tree. One signature turns into ten and ten into countless. Purple and shimmering is Agatha’s brand upon you. Rio yanks and reaches for the dagger she keeps handy.
Rio’s true name appears in shimmering green letters, then. Same as Agatha’s, there are countless signatures. They conjoin and overlap until the walls of your heart look like nothing more than a child’s colorful scribbles.
She stares at the walls in disbelief. The knife in her hand clatters to the ground.
“I’ve carved your names upon my heart so I’ll never forget who it belongs to.” You whisper.
“Sweetheart…”
You bend and collect her blade, pressing it into her hand, “Now do it yourself.”
Her hand wraps around the handle reflexively. Rio’s hand doesn’t leave the spot over your heart, feeling the steady, truthful beat.
“It’ll hurt you.” Rio says. She doesn’t bother hiding the desire in her voice.
You urge, “Make me hurt.”
Each artful stroke of her blade is slow. You whimper, but grip her wrist and push the blade deeper into your flesh. She scoffs when tears flood your eyes. The tears run down your cheeks while you smile, filled with bliss and ache in equal measure.
It’s a gift to love so deeply it wounds you. You never want her to stop; who, aside from your shared scar, holds such power? Who else in the world could touch your heart truly enough to carve into it?
There’s delight in her every movement. She consumes the pain of millions and yet, none of it is of her own making. She can only relish in what others have done; torture for a being who remains eternally intimate with the greatest methods of drawing out agony. Death has no free will but that you offer her—and she takes what none else would give, ravenously.
Is it enough?
Not forever, something tells you, you think it might be her, but for now.
--
1925 
“You called?” Rio asks. 
“If I didn’t know any better I’d say you’re avoiding me.” 
Agatha leans against the wall beside a small window. The pane has been slid upward, letting in the sounds of the city below, releasing the smoke of Agatha’s cigarette into the air outside. 
The cigarette is clutched in gloved hands. Her expression is amused as she draws in and releases the smoke, watching it form the shapes she wills. Though it has no effect on such a witch, Rio admires the object’s capability of bringing Agatha infinitesimally closer to her. 
“We’ve been busy.” 
“Busy or not, I’d say twelve bodies earns me a visit. And with the bulk of good booze I just removed from the market, I’d say I’ve earned a little more.” 
An obvious lure with paltry bait, still Rio bites, “What do you have in mind?”
“Let me see her.” 
She should. You’ve come to accept Agatha’s absence in your life, but she sees how much time you spend in the bower, and how you flinch when her name comes up. Rio hadn’t expected the frequency of Agatha’s name on the lips of covens walking the road to be so overwhelming, but it always drives you right into her arms; that she will relish. 
But Death is not giving. She takes. Taking is, in fact, her favorite hobby. Twelve bodies is not enough to make up for the haunted look in your eyes. She wants more—will have it. Agatha has to earn you. 
“I’ll need a little more from you.” Rio drawls. 
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to kill that many witches here with the nightlife?” Agatha throws her hands up. Ash flies from the forgotten cigarette. 
The sounds of Chicago seem to grow louder, as if to aid her point. Rio grins. She crosses the small space and takes the cigarette, snuffing it out on the back of Agatha’s hand. The action prompts a quiet moan. 
“It shouldn’t be a problem. What I want, you have an abundance of.” Rio’s smile widens as she manipulates Agatha’s hand, removing the glove, pushing and prodding until purple flashes along the flesh. 
A cooling breeze sneaks in the window and rustles the fringe along Agatha’s dress. It’s a beautiful thing, short and decadent. Rio knows you’ve enjoyed the few sightings of the period fashion you’ve glimpsed, but like her, you’d enjoy this specific dress in a pile on the floor. 
Agatha’s eyes stare at where Rio’s flesh meets her own. Her eyes are contemplative, calculating. She hesitates. And that is her fatal mistake. 
Rio throws her across the room with a shove. Agatha’s side hits one of the walls and she falls, face-first, onto the mattress she’s been sleeping on. The springs shriek at the sudden weight. Agatha snarls, throwing out a blast of purple that slams into Rio’s chest. Rio moans something filthy. 
There’s a brief struggle where Rio does her best to keep Agatha pinned; to the bed, to the wall, wherever there’s a surface. Yet Agatha is slippery. Her magic whisks her right out of the hold Rio puts her in and wherever Agatha wills it; which currently, is behind the other witch so Agatha can kick the back of her knees. Rio kneels not of her own volition. 
She braces to stand, only to find the blade of her own dagger at her throat. 
Rio’s gaze has lost any warmth. Her affection is buried deep, beneath layers and layers of earth she craves to bury Agatha in right this second, “You’re breaking her heart.” 
“That shouldn’t be a problem, you like seeing her cry.” 
“When I’m the one responsible.” 
Agatha rolls her eyes. She maintains a carefully ambivalent expression. Rio knows better; knows, under all that forced emotion, that Agatha’s heart is waging against her head, warring over her selfish desire to keep every bit of power. 
Then, something shifts. Rio feels it. Agatha has made her choice and it isn’t you. And it ignites a rage in her chest unlike anything she’s felt in centuries. 
She snatches the dagger back from Agatha’s grasp and only just barely resists the urge to bury it in her chest. If she has to drag Agatha back to you kicking and screaming, she will. You would like that, wouldn’t you?
“I’ll kill you.” Rio vows, and means it. Agatha can’t run away from the two of you if her soul is Rio’s to keep. 
Agatha’s eyes flash with fear. Then, she grins around it, “If you can catch me.” 
Latin words roll off Agatha’s tongue faster than Rio can comprehend. She recognizes the words and what they mean, where they’ve come from. Rio reaches out with her magic for the Darkhold too late; it, and Agatha, have completely vanished from her awareness. 
When she returns to The Road and finds you pacing before the bower, she stops short. 
“Did you—is she dead?” You ask, worrying your lip. Though your eyes dart every which way, looking for whatever manifestation of Agatha you believe she’s brought you. 
“Sweetheart…” 
--
1937
“Do you think if I cut you open you would heal too fast for me to do any research?” 
Rio tilts her head, considering. She’s sprawled out on the plush couch inside the physical manifestation of your heart, toying with her knife, having a staring contest with the unblinking jar of eyes while you jot down thoughts into notebook number… well, she’s lost count. 
“Probably.” She answers, “I’m also not sure I have organs.” 
You pause, “How is that even possible?” 
“Magic, sweetheart.”
Leaning back, your mind begins to race; given how old she is, it would only make sense that the organs the body came with are gone, rotted away—but would the flesh not go with it? You massage your temples. Life magic is no easier to understand than Death magic. 
There’s only one way to test your hypothesis. You stand from your place at the table and cross to her, straddling her hips where she lay on the couch. 
“I want to see.” You say, holding out a hand. 
Rio hands over her dagger and sinks further into the couch, as if that is possible. She grins up at you with no shortage of delight. You do your best to tamp down on your own grin. 
The flesh beneath your hands is warm and smells of damp earth where you peel away her shirt. Her eyes darken with every inch of flesh revealed to you. Firm and unafraid, you press the tip of the dagger down against her sternum. The action earns you an exaggerated moan. 
You rip the dagger away, glaring, “Behave.” 
“Or what?” Rio taunts, tongue pressing against the inside of her cheek. 
“Or I stop letting you watch my dissections.” 
She tenses, “You wouldn’t.” 
“Wouldn’t I, beloved?” 
“Get on with it.” 
You lean down and steal a quick kiss. It melts away the darling little pout on her lips. 
When you press the dagger back down, the flesh bends, but doesn’t open. You tilt your head and press harder. Rio watches, unphased. There is absolutely no give to her flesh. It gets to a point where you’re pressing your entire body weight behind the dagger, but Rio only laughs, squirming as if the action tickles. 
You whine and sigh. The dagger is dropped unceremoniously onto her chest while you lean an elbow against the back of the couch, sinking somewhat into the cushion. 
“If you want live specimens, we can collect some.” She soothes. 
The idea isn’t intolerable, but you shake your head. 
“They scream too much.” 
“Anesthetic exists, sweetheart.” 
“I suppose that’s true.” 
You look away, tracing the walls and their offerings with your eyes. Upon them hang paintings of your own making; scenes of life, death, love, fear—mostly fear. 
The human condition fascinates you, always has. Of the emotions to study, fear is the hardest; it is always fleeting in your wake; your face is too kind, too trustworthy, wiping away any sense of the unease you seek to study. You stare at your paintings and feel only distaste, knowing they’re not quite right. 
You can’t claim to have always had such taste. No, a cultivation for the finer flavors of life and death takes time. You can pinpoint where the itch started, however; that day in your childhood village when a dying soul reached out to you—scarcely were you a day older than four—and found no assistance. 
How beautiful it was; grisly, messy, but beautiful. You did not flinch away. Rather, you found yourself drawn in, eager to see more. And being of a coven of healers, your desire was fulfilled. Death was yours before you knew her name. 
Looking down at her, she stares back, unashamed to be caught. The heart in your chest—which has felt so stagnant in recent years—warms toward something almost pure. 
Rio will one day claim your soul. This, you know, and accept; your soul belonged to her the second you watched that woman die. You fear the when. What becomes of you when she claims your soul? What if you have yet to conduct all the research you desire? There is so much still to learn and you know she’ll abandon it for the chance to keep you. 
You love her, but you’ll never forgive her the knowledge you’ll one day lose. The warmth in your chest doesn’t ebb. 
Her top is still splayed open from your attempt at dissection. A healthy amount of flesh is bared to your eyes. You trace one finger from her neck to the center of her chest and tap, just above where a heart should be. 
“When you come for me,” You say, “I want to hold your heart in my hand.” 
“You already do.” She utters. 
“Will you let me study it, then, when I’m but a soul?” 
“You can study whatever you wish as long as it leads to me.”
--
1989
Agatha dwells on mistakes, often. She just doesn’t allow them to distract from her purpose. She is ruthless, to her very core. 
She spends an embarrassing amount of time trying to open the damned door to The Road. One coven after another, all failures. There is an obscene beauty in claiming a reward for what would otherwise be failure on her part. 
Time passes, enemies made, promises broken. She shrugs them all off. Yet she can’t shake the feeling of your hands in her hair, on her face. The lingering whisper of your kisses haunts her. The Darkhold whispers to her, oftentimes in language she shouldn’t comprehend, and it offers her the solution, should she just be patient; 
The Scarlet Witch
--
2026
The power that floats before you is biting and all too familiar. 
It fights against your hold, twisting and writhing like a wild animal, desperate to return to its mistress. But you’re stronger for now. The Scarlet Witch threw this power into the ether in her attempt at playing Death, and now it is yours to hold until Agatha comes for it. 
Anger rubs against the heart in your chest like a cat. You lean into it, feeling your own power respond to subdue that which isn’t yours. 
Rio watches beside you. She runs her fingers through the purple electricity contained in your palms, laughing when it fights her. Lips press against your temple. 
“Not long now.” She assures you. 
You feel longing and fury in equal measure. 
“I want her soul, Rio.” You whisper. 
A small chuckle, low beside your ear. It sends shivers down your spine. Her hand grasps your chin and turns you to face her, her lips meeting your own. The kiss is soft. You melt into it. 
She pulls back, tone careful, “You didn’t walk The Road, sweetheart.” 
You have not earned what The Road promises to grant. 
--
2026
Agatha doesn’t expect the end of The Road to look like Agnes’ Westview home, nor does she expect to see Rio perched on the roof, leaning back, as if waiting. But every step closer to the front yard makes her more furious. 
She is owed her prize. 
Upon her first step in Agnes’ yard, the front door opens, and she is blasted with something so strong that it knocks her back to The Road, on her back. She groans. Yet, she feels more alive than she has in centuries. Her body shudders with its missing piece; her power curling up in her veins, pleased to be home. 
She sits up, wincing at the ache in her bones that continues despite the gift she’s received. Leaves stick to the back of her arms, little pieces having crunched beneath her weight and adhered to her skin. She does her best to brush them away while getting to her feet. 
Rio remains on the roof, grinning. 
There, on the porch of Agnes’ house, is you. All the glory of you. 
Agatha’s heart leaps in her chest despite the scowl on your face. To her, you haven’t aged a day; still the young, fresh-faced witch following at her heels, dizzy on knowledge and the thrumming power inside. Time has not erased the love she has—so great it threatens to bring her to her knees. 
“Dearest…” Agatha murmurs, taking a half-step forward. 
“You have your prize.” You sneer. 
Your heart aches, begging you to go to her; hasn’t it been centuries? But your pride holds you back. She left you here while she gallivanted around the world getting what she wanted. 
There’s a brief flash of hurt on Agatha’s face, before it morphs into a wicked grin. Her posture changes, too, to something more proud, as she slinks across the yard toward the porch. You resist the urge to take a step back. 
“No, I don’t.” She drawls, “Are you going to be a good pet and come home willingly, or do I have to put you on a leash?” 
Something inside you burns for her. You ache for her touch, for her to force you to do what she wants. It creeps through the cracks of your pride and turns it into something else. You stick out your chin. Agatha snickers. 
Magic pulses in your palms, pulling various items from around you to throw—not fast enough. Agatha has you kneeling with your hands bound in a blink. 
“That’s not very nice, dear. And after all I’ve done to get here.” 
You regain some of your fight, snarling, “You left me here.” 
Agatha hums. 
“Into the deal you stumbled your way into. I’m not the one who tied herself to The Road in a fit of pride.” 
“You were leaving me regardless. If I was going to be handed off, I was going to do it on my own terms.” 
“Did I specify a length of time in my proposal? Was there any explicit mention of how long She could have you before I came back?” Agatha asks, mean-spirited joy in her eyes upon watching the realization dawn in your own. All that time you spent agonizing… when you had shackled yourself, “Years lost because you wanted to be a self-righteous brat.” 
There’s a lilt to her voice that clues you in to everything you’d once seen instinctually; Agatha has been in just as much anguish as you have, left to walk the world alone. You see the pain in her eyes. Just like then, you try to get to her now, eager to fix it, to wipe it away. 
The binding around your arms keeps you stationary. You whine and pull against it. 
“Agatha,” You whine, “I’m sorry.” 
“You will be.” She says. Then she turns to your left, finger poised and accusing, “And you—you kept her away from me.” 
Rio shrugs, smiling, “I couldn’t just make it easy on you.” 
Agatha waves a hand and Rio is kneeling on the porch at your side, similarly bound. Yet where you look pained, she is delighted. 
“I’m sorry.” You repeat, “I didn’t mean to be bad.” 
“That doesn’t change that you were.” 
A cloud of purple smoke announces your arrival to the inner bedroom of Agnes’ house. It doesn’t look like what you’ve seen from Rio, though. Where Agnes had been bland and cookie-cutter, this is rich fabrics and deep wood. It is Agatha through and through. 
You and Rio kneel side-by-side at the foot of the bed, where Agatha perches. Her beautiful blue eyes don’t miss the slightest movement you make. She’s clad in a dark robe with snakes and flowers that has Rio leaning forward in interest. 
Agatha’s eyes lock on you, “You’re going to apologize. Properly.” 
“I’m sorry—” 
“With your tongue.” 
Leaning back on her forearms, Agatha spreads her legs, and you feel the desire in your body rush through you. It’s so strong you feel your head begin to pound. She’s pink and dripping and all you want is to do a good job for her. 
Yet, ever the brat, you lean forward and start with kissing her inner thighs. With every press of your lips to the delicate flesh you murmur an apology. She sighs. 
A hand weaves into your hair and yanks you back. Her eyes are dark. Her face is set in a punishing expression but you see the yearning in her that matches your own. She yanks again, lighter, and you moan. 
“What did I say?” She asks, before directing you where she wants you. 
Witches don’t subscribe to the idea of what a human would call heaven, but upon tasting her, you think you could get behind it. She’s warm and sweet. You flatten your tongue and drag it along her slit just to collect a better taste of her. Agatha’s hand presses you in harder as she moans. 
Without the use of your fingers, you have to use your tongue well. You stiffen it as much as you’re able when you delve inside her and hope it is even slightly close enough to satisfy. The pathetic sounds reaching your ears—breathy moans, sweet whimpers—tell you that you’re doing fine. 
“Good girl.” Agatha breathes out. 
You clench around nothing. You’re sure that you’ve ruined your undergarments thoroughly from how wet you are. 
Eager for more praise, you direct your attention to that small, fleshy bundle of nerves begging for your attention. You swirl your tongue around her clit and her hips stutter, before they grind against your face with a renewed sense of purpose. You smile. 
“Yes—there, more—” Agatha stutters. 
You were born to do as she commands. All you want is to make her happy. Following her directions is as easy as breathing. 
The tip of your tongue alternates between circling her clit and flicking it. Every flick earns you a high-pitched oh! and a firm grinding of her hips. Her thighs are tightening around your head, but she’s putting up a good fight. Her legs quiver. 
“There—there—I’m going to—” Is all the warning you’re given before Agatha shrieks and comes while rutting against your mouth. You lap up every drop of her wetness you can get with glee. You did this, you brought her this pleasure; the knowledge sends a happy jolt through you. 
Agatha’s grip on your hair releases and you lean back, taking in big lungfuls of air. She stares down at you with a thoroughly fucked-out expression that makes you preen. 
Then she leans over and pulls your lips to hers. She moans against the taste of herself on your lips, tongue collecting the flavor from your lips. You throw every ounce of love you possess into the kiss—willing her to understand the longing you felt, the thousands of hours you spent watching her lifeline just to make sure she was safe. 
“Good girl.” Agatha murmurs, pressing little kisses all over your face, “My good girl.” 
“All yours.” You agree.
She laughs, low and smooth, “That’s not quite the truth, is it?” 
The two of you turn to regard Rio in unison. She remains in the position Agatha left her in, kneeling and bound. You admire her restraint at not breaking the bindings. Though you guess Agatha wouldn’t take kindly to that. 
Rio’s eyes are black with desire. They dart between the two of you. She takes in the wetness on your face, licking her lips. You can feel her eagerness for a taste. 
She’s writhing a bit in her restraints, pressing her thighs together and wiggling, looking for any source of friction she can find. Agatha tuts and she stops. If it were up to you, your face would be between her thighs, ears enjoying every sound she makes. But it isn’t up to you. 
Agatha scoots back up the bed until she’s sitting against the headboard. That’s when you feel the restraints on you fall away. She beckons the two of you with a finger and you both follow the command, eager. 
“Come here.” Agatha urges you specifically, patting her bare thigh. 
You obey and straddle the appendage, shuddering against the feeling against your throbbing clit. There’s a split second where you think of just grinding down and taking what you want. But you don’t—you have to be good. 
Words pass between Agatha and Rio during your silent struggle. When you look, she’s lying along the length of the bed, legs bunched up and spread wide next to you. 
“What am I going to do with you both?” Agatha muses. 
“Fuck us?” Rio drawls. 
“You, my good girl,” Agatha says, ignoring Rio as she soothes a hand through your hair, “are going to use me until you come. And my bad girl isn’t going to come until I tell her she can.” 
You shudder, whimpering, while Rio whines next to you. Agatha kisses your forehead while dealing a slap to Rio that makes her groan. 
A hand settles onto your hip and begins to guide you through the motions of grinding against her. The friction is difficult to attain with how wet you are, but you do what you can, crying out everytime the pressure is just enough to make your toes curl. It won’t take long for you to finish. 
Your face is buried in Agatha’s neck, where you press loving little kisses to the flesh. As a result you cannot see Rio. But you hear her; every movement of Agatha’s deft fingers through her wetness, every growl and keen of desire, every slap of Agatha’s hand when she gets a bit too eager. She won’t last long either, from what you can tell. 
The image of Rio and Agatha in your mind is enough to push you toward that delightful little taste of death. Your hands tighten over Agatha’s shoulders. 
“Agatha, can I—please?” You plead. 
“So obedient, asking for permission even when you don’t need to.” Agatha praises, “Go on, darling.” 
With her hand guiding you and her voice in your ear, you come so hard you see stars behind your eyes. You’re not sure what sound leaves your lips, only that your throat aches afterward. 
You tune back in to hear a brutal slap of flesh on flesh. Rio snarls. 
“Beg.” Agatha’s voice commands in your ear, though you know it isn’t for you. 
Rio stays stubbornly silent. 
The sounds of Agatha toying with her come to an abrupt halt. You don’t have the strength to lift your face from your refuge, but you can imagine that stubborn, yet pleading look in Rio’s face; wanting so deeply but not willing to give up what is required. 
“If you don’t want to behave, she can have your pleasure instead.” 
“No! I’ll—” You hear Rio grit her teeth, “Please, Agatha. Please let me come.” 
Agatha laughs. 
“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” She coos. 
Seconds—or maybe minutes—before Rio wails. There’s something primordial and animalistic wrapped inside it, almost like a growl. It makes you shudder. Then all that's left in the room is the sound of breathing. 
You spent so long aching for something just like this. It’s beautiful, though you know it can’t stay; all three of you are far too ambitious to live a domestic existence, but it’s nice for now. You missed them. The heart in your chest feels complete again, filling to the brim with affection. 
Tears seep from your eyes and you pull back before Agatha can question it, though you do feel her stiffen. You press kisses to her neck, her sternum, the inside of her wrist; then you grab Rio’s hand and press kisses to every pad of her fingers. 
With every kiss, you murmur I love you. 
--
2027 
“If you don’t sedate him at least a little bit, his heart is going to give out.” 
Rio’s sudden voice next to you isn’t surprising. You’ve grown used to her coming and going—Death waits for no one, after all. Her lips press to your cheek and you accept the affection. 
“She did sedate him. Three times.” Agatha’s voice calls from the next room. 
“Oh, I see.” 
Rio leans over to examine the man on your table with no shortage of interest. He stares back, eyes impossibly wide. His heart rate picks up. 
“What is he?” She asks. 
“Not sure. Rapid regeneration, odd capabilities. Mutant, maybe?” 
“He’s certainly not a witch.” Agatha’s leaning against the doorway now, arms folded over her chest, “Though it is taking a fair amount of magic to keep him subdued.” 
“He’s no match for you, naturally.” You compliment. 
Both Agatha and Rio grin at that. The former comes up behind you, hands settling on your hips. Her lips press against your neck. Then, she leans over and steals a kiss from Rio, who is all too eager to meet her halfway.
You smile. The heart in your chest threatens to burst—not unlike the specimen in front of you. 
“Well, aren’t you sweet today.” Agatha comments. 
“Aiming for a reward?” Rio asks. 
Rio kisses her way up the flash of skin available to her eyes, making you sigh, leaning back into Agatha’s hands. Then Agatha’s lips fasten to the other side of your neck. Your head falls back and you laugh. Then you moan. 
The experiment on your table is forgotten as you’re dragged into the next room and bent into all sorts of shapes you couldn’t even imagine on your own. Oh, well; if he dies before the six hour mark, you can always just find another one. The same cannot be said of the witches bracketing you. And oh, how beautiful that is. 
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quarterlifekitty · 4 months ago
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cw: dubcon, intox, general nasty talk, also reader is a big girl in this
Imagine being with Nikolai as a bit of a late bloomer.
He’s the first real boyfriend you’ve ever had, and he takes almost too much pride in that.
Every guy who’s ever tried to get close to you before has been a boy. Didn’t know how to handle you right. Didn’t know how to caress a sensitive doe like you. Didn’t have enough weight to pin you with. Didn’t know that sometimes when girls like you start backing away, it’s because they want to be chased.
Nik is sweet, really. Always worried about how warm you are, how comfortable you are, if you’re relaxed. He knows you’re fidgety— that you need to feel one of his weighty palms on you before you’re able to settle.
He knows his malyshka is a skittish thing. Not used to being around men. No, you were used to boys that wanted to get themselves off, while males of Nik’s variety won’t stop until you’re devoured.
Pliant. That’s how he wants you. Relaxed, hazy— not enough thoughts in that pretty head for you to start worrying when his touches get heavier. That’s why he keeps holding his drink to your lips, telling, saying “take another sip for me pchelka, yeah? There you go— good girl.”
Pchelka is a good name for you, he thinks. Little bee. He’s having you sip nectar so that you make plenty of honey for him later.
Nik usually likes to drink something that puts hair on the chest, but for you, he’ll nurse at something sweeter for a change.
He knows you’re ready when he feels the warmth of your cheeks while you slur against his skin.
Nikolai never fails to grope and squeeze at your softest parts when he has you spread and gasping under him. When you’re too drunk to redirect his hands, embarrassed by how fixated he is with your hips, stomach, and thighs. He has experience, and he learned long ago that laying with a plush girl is the closest a mortal man can ever get to laying with Venus.
He pinches at your cheeks and coos down at you, swooping to suck at your tongue and teethe gently at your lower lip.
“This is just what my girl needs, yes? Nice and spread and relaxed for me… that’s the only way I’ll manage to fit this thick cock into you, malyshka.”
He drowns your fear, your fight or flight, with liquor and syrupy words that stick in your mind better than your own thoughts.
He keeps his weight on you, just enough to keep you still without smothering. The way you quake when he bottoms out brings his smile all the way up to his eyes. His hand settles on your stomach, beneath your navel.
“You feel me in here, zoloste? This place is just for lovers. And you keep it nice and warm for me, don’t you, malyshka? Must’ve been so lonely all this time, waiting for a man— your man— to keep you settled enough to push all the way in here…”
He laughs to himself as if he’d remembered an inside joke, still caressing your skin.
“It’s a place only your husband should be, don’t you think?”
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yanderenightmare · 1 year ago
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TW: nsfw, dubcon, coercion, bullying
fem reader
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Your bully says he’s always been curious about what it’s like to fuck a geeky good girl like you—and that he’ll leave you if you let him have a taste.
You knew he was probably mostly joking when he offered… but you were sick and tired and perhaps a little desperate for the chance of him finally leaving you alone—so you balled your fists within his shirt, dragged him inside an empty classroom, and told him he could do whatever he wanted.
You don’t know who was more surprised.
He never knew you to be so brazen—but it’s not like you’re some blushing virgin, either.
You have experience. However, most of that experience is with nicer guys… not someone like him…
It’s not like you expected him to go easy on you, but still…
You bruise against the desk he has you bent over on—dewy-faced and panting, lying cheek-down in your own drool as he fucks full-chested moans right out of you. He snickers when your thighs shake, whistling with a grin when feeling your tight cunt flutter around him—slick dripping to the floor in a little puddle.
“You’re so wet it’s embarrassing.” He laughs.
He’s got your arms tussled behind your back, using your shirt as bindings—having balled your skirt up around your waist in two tight fists, knuckles white while using it to keep you still as he pounds into you with a mean snap of his hips. 
Your heart drops when you hear a rip. A second time when, you feel his movements still, and a thick warmth starts to fill you.
“Ah—fuck—don’t squeeze so tight—I’m ‘bout to—” He grunts, but it’s already too late once he pulls out.
Panting heavily as his cock drips with the last drop—hunched over—his eyes fall to your glossy cunt, half-mast while staring at the way his cum slowly leaks out of the still-fluttering little hole. 
He feels a cute-aggressive urge to slap it but doesn’t want to get his hand all sticky.
He pulls his pants up instead, only bothering to button his shirt up halfway, tie hanging loosely around his neck. Anyone with eyes could guess what he’d been doing with his sweaty hair and that flushed look on his face.
And yet he starts leaving without a care or a word. 
Already halfway out the door before you get your wits back.
“No—wait!” You warble, unknotting your sleeves to wrap your shirt around you. “You can’t leave me like this—my skirt…” You hold the tattered piece up for him to see, showing him the tear he’d made, rendering it unwearable.
His hand is still on the doorknob, only bothering to acknowledge you with a jaded look over his shoulder. “How’s that my problem?”
Your brows cinch that pitiful way it always does. That cute way that has his gut bubble and fizz. “Please…” You plead, and it’s almost enough to make his cock perk up again. “Just bring me a skirt from lost and found… please?”
He sighs—the door at his back as he leans against it with arms folded upon his chest. “Tch—and what's in it for me?”
You nibble your lip in thought—but you already know the answer. 
“I’ll be better at it next time—just... please?”
“Hm…” He hums in thought, a small smirk playing at the corner of his lips, tugged as if your words had pulled it with string. “Wait here, I’ll be back.”
The door closed with a click, and you were left in the classroom alone.
A few minutes passed. You doubted his return. 
You could always call a friend… but you didn’t want to get anyone into any trouble—calling them when they’re in class. Also, how would you even explain it to them? What type of person skips class to have sex in an empty classroom? Not to mention, they’d ask who you’d done it with—and there was just no way you could tell them. It’d be too embarrassing—you might just die—and if anyone else ever found out, he’d more likely kill you himself.
Well… suppose you could always make the run to Lost and Found yourself. The hallways should be mostly empty at this hour, but there’s really no guarantee. 
In the end, the thought of someone catching you in cum-soaked panties makes you hold onto all hope that your bully would return as he’d said.
And fifteen minutes later, he does. Black school skirt in one hand and strawberry milk in the other. Seemed he’d taken the time to stop at a vending machine.
But you don’t care. Breathing out a sigh of relief—gratitude on your lips as you leap over to him. “Thank you—” 
You eagerly accept the skirt—putting it on just as quickly.
He leans back against the door again, sipping his carton while watching you fall still with dismay. Humored at the pout that takes your lips as you look up at him with those pitiful doe-eyes.
“This is too short…”
He hides his smile with a tilt of his head. “Oh?” He grabs his jaw and pretends to assess your bottom half with focus. “Hmm… turn around, lemme see.”
You listen trustingly—as though you actually believe he cares. It almost makes him laugh out loud at how fucking gullible you are. But he keeps his act tight. Humming at the sight of the skirt only barely covering the crease of your cute ass.
“You’re right—something’s off.” He admits. 
You look back at him just in time to see his smirk before he grabs you. 
Keeping you still with an arm wrapped around your waist, he tips you over and grabs your panties—pulling them despite your body's protests as you wiggle in his hold. You cry as the fabric wedges up between your asscheeks, kicking your legs behind you until feeling it rip.
“There you go…” He coos while letting go of you, twirling the torn string in his hand. “Now it fits perfectly.”
He chuckles at the pretty tears clumped upon your lashes as you look at him with your lip tucked between your teeth until you finally get the grit to say what’s on the tip of your tongue.
“You’re an asshole.”
He sneers with a smile and bags your panties in his pocket—then turns around and opens the door. Leaving you worse off than before.
“Never said otherwise, buttercup.”
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BNHA – Bakugou, Dabi, Shigaraki, Hawks, Shinso, Kirishima
JJK – Sukuna, Geto, Gojo, Toji
DS – Akaza, Sanemi
HQ – Kuro, Miya twins
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im-ovulating · 5 months ago
Note
For Kinktober: anything with Jasper Whitlock, but preferably size kink (short reader), voice kink, hand kink, and some on top of the clothes action / sex in the clothes. Choose all of it or one, I don't care, just having a brainrot about him: my ovaries explode every time I see this gif
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(A/n: Kinktober Day 6/15! I wanted to keep all of this year's kinktober fics below 2.5k, but this one got away from me ;v;)
Word Count: 3,842
Summary- Well, you HAVE to take on his challenge -I mean, experiment. It's only the responisble thing to do as his study partner.
Warnings: Strip game, Fingering, PIV, Creampie, Cocky! Jasper, Not proofread
Age Rating: 18+ Minors DNI
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Jasper Whitlock x Fem! Reader: Study Buddy
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"Did you know that predators have front-facing eyes, but prey normally have eyes on the side of their faces?" You ask Jasper as you scan your textbook. He had agreed to help you study for an upcoming test. "It's because the prey has to be able to look out for danger."
Not only is evolutionary bio not your strongest subject, but your professor is an asshat so you really can't afford to fail this test.
"I did," he mumbles as he highlights a section that he thinks you should go through again. "Did you know that when two animals make eye contact, the first to look away is the submissive?" Jasper asks back.
"That's gotta be BS, right? What if one just doesn't want to look at the other's ugly mug?" Your retort is weak, but your tone has the confidence of a straight, cis, white man who's telling you what your own name means.
Jasper lets out a small, huffed laugh and finally looks up at you, warm gold meeting e/c. "I don't think animals think that way, darlin'."
"Are you an animal whisperer?" You snark, crossing your arms with a cocked eyebrow.
"Do you really think it's not real?" He gets back on topic. When you shake your head, he turns his chair towards you before doing the same to your own so you both face each other. "Really? Then, let's test that theory, hm? You seem pretty confident in yourself, so what's the harm?"
"I seem pretty confident because I am pretty confident." You mark your place and shut the textbook.
He chuckles with a small shake of the head. Leaning back in his chair with one arm thrown over the back, Jasper says, "Let's play a game."
"We're supposed to be studyin-" "It's a science experiment."
When you fall back against your seat, he continues. "We'll make eye contact, we'll stare at each other, and the first to look away loses. And if you lose..." he smirks a little, "you lose a piece of clothing. Best out of five wins."
You chew on your lip as you mull it over. You're confident that you can keep eye contact. And the submissive thing is bullshit, anyway, so it's not like your pride will take a hit. "So, strip poker but with a staring contest?" He nods.
"Exactly."
"...okay."
You meet Jasper's warm golden gaze, determination etched on your face. There's no way you're going to lose this little game of his.
"I know what's going to happen. You're going to give in; you can't take the pressure." You ignore him, zeroing on a small fleck of dark gold in his eyes to ground your thoughts.
As the seconds tick by, you resist the urge to look away, focused solely on holding Jasper's stare. His voice, low and smooth, sends shivers down your spine. "That's a good girl, keeping those pretty eyes on me."
Your breath catches at the sudden praise, your lips parting in a small, silent gasp. You won't let him distract you that easily, though. You're in it to win it.
Jasper's long, slender fingers drum lightly against his jean-clad thigh, drawing your gaze for just a moment before you force yourself to look back into his eyes. His lips curve into a knowing smirk.
It takes you a second to realize. "...fuck!"
"That's my round, darlin'." He goads.
With a small grumble and more force than necessary, you all but rip your socks off and throw them at his head. He catches them before they even get close. You're less coordinated in your attempt to dodge them, and all you can do is grumble more when they hit you square in the middle of your face.
"Stop looking so smug - there's still plenty of time for me to whoop your ass." You can't decide if you want to wipe that dumb-ass, unfairly charming smirk off his equally handsome face or if you want to pull him in and kiss him silly. Probably both... Yeah, both is good.
Jasper's eyes gleam with amusement as he watches your continued huffing and puffing. He leans back in his chair, his fingers still tapping against his leg.
"Don't be so sour, darlin'," he grins, his voice low and velvety smooth. "The game's just getting started."
You narrow your eyes at him, determined not to let his distracting voice and looks throw you off this time. "Just shut up and start the next round, Whitlock."
He chuckles, the sound rumbling deep in his chest, and leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he holds your gaze. The air crackles with tension as you both refuse to back down, each daring the other to be the first to look away.
The seconds tick by, the only sound the quiet rhythm of your breathing. You can feel the weight of Jasper's stare, intense and captivating, drawing you in. Your pulse quickens, palms growing sweaty, but you refuse to lose again.
Just when you think you might actually win this round, Jasper's lips curve into a slow, predatory smile. "You know you want to look away. You want to give in, to submit; it's in your DNA. C'mon... Just look away, prove what we both already know: that when it comes down to it, you'd do nothing but roll over and show your belly..."
You roll your eyes in a subconscious attempt to ignore how his words, no matter how much they were shit talking, made your heart leap into your throat. With a triumphant smirk, Jasper declares, "My round again."
"That's not fair! You shouldn't be able to annoy me into losing!" You lie through your teeth about the true effect he's having on you.
Barking out a laugh, he says, "The only rule was that we can't look away. We never decided talking or touching were off limits. You lost fair and square, sugar, so lose an item."
"But-" "Three seconds before i decide which one," he interrupts with a cheeky grin. "and you might not like what I choose... Three. Two-" You let out a frustrated groan, quickly removing your shirt and tossing it to the side. His laughter only serves to further stoke the flames of your competitive spirit. "There we go! Good girl."
"I thought we're supposed to be studying." You try to feign nonchalance as you sit there, bra exposed and with only three items left. Technically, you're tied in terms of clothing remaining, but it's also not lost on you that it's currently 0-2 in Jasper's favor.
"We are studying; this is a science experiment, remember? Unless you're ready to admit that you're wrong AND that you're submissive. That would be quite the win on my end." Well, shit. Now you can't back out. You'll be damned if you let him have something to hang over your head.
"Just you wait, Whitlock," you snap, trying to regain your focus for the next round. "I'm just getting warmed up."
You narrow your eyes at Jasper, determined not to let him fluster you again. The stakes are higher now, but you've got this.
Taking a deep breath, you meet his gaze once again. The tension in the air is palpable as you both refuse to back down.
Jasper's lips curl into a challenging smirk, his long fingers still tapping a steady rhythm against his thigh. You force yourself to focus solely on his eyes, blocking out everything else.
Seconds turn to minutes as you hold his stare, your heartbeat thundering in your ears but you refuse to waver.
Just when you think you're finding a groove and might stand a chance at winning, Jasper leans forward, his voice low and sultry. "You're doing so well, darlin'. But I can see it in your eyes - you're starting to crack."
A shiver runs down your spine at his words, but you grit your teeth and push on. You will not lose this round, no matter what underhanded tactics he tries.
The room fills with an intensity that almost makes it hard to breath as you continue your silent battle of wills. Jasper's gaze is unwavering, a predatory gleam in his eyes that makes your breath catch and waver.
Jasper's hand suddenly moves, his fingers slowly inching up your thigh. Your eyes widen and your pulse quickens but you refuse to look away.
"Good girl," Jasper acknowledges, his cool touch burning through the fabric of your jeans. "Just keep your eyes on me."
His fingers continue their slow, tantalizing trek up your thigh, causing your breath to hitch in your throat. His gaze is electric, drawing you in despite your best efforts to maintain composure. Your heartbeat thunders in your ears, but you refuse to break eye contact, stubbornly holding his molten stare.
"Jasper…" you breathe, unable to keep the quiver out of your voice. His lips curve into a knowing smile, fingers inching higher.
"That's it, darlin'," his voice is low and velvety smooth. "Just focus on me. Don't look away. It should be easy for you, right? You're a strong, dominant girl, after all."
The temptation to give in, to let your eyes slip shut, is nearly overwhelming. But you dig deep, summoning every ounce of willpower to maintain the intense eye contact.
Jasper's hand reaches the waist of your jeans, his fingertips dancing along the sensitive skin just above. Your pulse quickens and a shiver runs down your spine.
"J-Jasper…" you stammer, grip tightening on the arms of your chair.
His eyes shine with a predatory gleam as he watches you. "C'mon, sugar. Just a little bit longer… You can do it. Keep those pretty eyes on me.
"Or you can look away, let me take these pants off." he adds with a self-satisfied smirk.
You know you're teetering on the edge, your resolve rapidly crumbling under the onslaught of his touch and his words.
The seconds stretch on, the tension in the room palpable. Jasper's fingers continue their torturously slow ascent, and you find yourself struggling to keep your focus on his eyes.
His fingers dance along the underwire of your bra, "And after that, I'll pull those panties off of you with my teeth; maybe dive right in and see if that pussy tastes as good as I think it does." Your eyes flutter shut as a white-hot spike of arousal shoots straight to your core. He pulls his hand away and when you reopen your eyes, you see a triumphant grin has spread across Jasper's face. "That's my girl." Your eyes widen as you realize - you've lost. Again.
"You've got two chances left. Still think you're going to win?" Jasper asks. "I'm sure you can do it. Right? You can turn it around. Round 4."
As you settle in for yet another round, he gets in another jab. "You're gonna break. You're going to and it's going to be really fast."
His hand returns to your thigh; this time it only takes a second for him to reach the hem of your panties, his fingers dancing along the elastic. You swallow harshly, but keep his gaze. "You're not even trying to fight it; you're just letting me touch you."
"You're gonna keep looking me in the eyes when I move your panties to the side and slide my fingers in, aren't you?" Your breath hitches. "No, don't lose yet. Come on, look at me. Don't look away, I don't want you to look away." It's hard to fight against the urge to hide your face but you manage. You can feel how hot your cheeks are, and you can only imagine the expression on your face.
"Good girl," Jasper murmurs. "Don't look away. Don't you dare look away." You start to squirm a little, clenching your thighs desperate for some friction. "Why are you turned on?" He teases, his fingers still threatening to dip under the thin fabric. "Is it because you're submissive and you like losing? There's fight and flight, but you... you freeze. And you're gonna let me take what I want."
He finally tugs your panties aside and dips two fingers into you. your teeth dig into your bottom lip as you try to focus. You're so wet you swear you can feel it dripping down towards your ass. Fuck this is embarrassing but you realize you'd rather die than stop now; you want this. You want to just let go and let him take and take and take.
You crave his touch, crave to be used by him.
Jasper's fingers crook up into a spot that has stars dancing in your vision. Somehow you manage to just barely keep your eyes on him.
"C'mon, don't lose. I only have three pieces of clothing; you can still win this..." he taunts. "Don't look away, don't look away. Don't look away. Don't lose. Come on, look at me in my eyes. Good girl- don't look away."
"There it is..." He muses, pressing his fingers into your g spot as your back arches away from your chair and a debauched moan rips from your throat. "You lose again, darlin'." He brings his hand up to his mouth to clean your arousal off his fingers.
You let out a frustrated whine, your chest heaving as you try to catch your breath. Jasper's smug grin only infuriates you further - he's clearly enjoying this power he has over you.
"That's not fair," you pant, your body still tingling from his touch. "You're cheating."
Jasper chuckles, leaning back in his chair as he examines you hungrily. "Darlin', I don't need to cheat to make you submit to me. You want this just as badly as I do. Like I said earlier- we never agreed 'no touching'."
You can only glare half-heartedly at him, knowing he's right.
"Hey," Jasper ducks his head to catch your eyes as you look at the ground to avoid his gaze. "You got one more. It's the last round. You're still in this; you can still win. You've got to get at least one piece from me. you can't lose every time - that would just be pathetic..." You go to smack his arm, but he avoids it.
With a resigned and frustrated sigh, you unhook your bra and let it fall to the floor. "Let's get this over with already." you grumble. you want this to end partly to stop the embarrassment of losing this badly, but mainly because the sooner this is over, the sooner you can fuck him.
As the final round starts, Jasper reaches up to grab your chin, tilting your head up to barely brush his lips against yours. His eyes never leave yours as he asks, "Why don't you just look away on purpose so I can take these off and fuck you?"
His other hand reaches down to press his thumb against your clit, causing your eyes to shut as you let loose a shaky moan. "Oh- you lost..." The grin he gives you can only be described as devilish.
Faster than you can process, he is picking you up by the thighs and setting you on the table.
True to his word, he drops to his knees between your legs and. after pressing a few possessive kisses along your belly and the apex of your thighs, he takes your panties between his teeth and starts to slide them off of you.
You shudder with anticipation as Jasper's cool breath ghosts over your most intimate area. With painstaking slowness, he tugs your panties down, revealing your glistening cunt. His eyes never leave yours, molten gold boring into your very soul.
A playful smirk graces his perfect lips as he tosses the flimsy fabric aside. Calloused hands caress the soft skin of your inner thighs, urging them to part further. You comply willingly, heart racing in excitement.
Jasper hums appreciatively, drinking in the sight of your exposed cunt. Leaning in, he trails feather-light kisses along your dripping folds, teasing you mercilessly. Just when you think you can't take the anticipation any longer, his talented tongue darts out, parting your swollen lips and delving deep.
An involuntary moan escapes your lips as pleasure courses through you. Jasper sets an agonizingly slow pace, savoring every twitch and tremble of your body. His hands grip your hips, holding you steady as he explores every inch of your most sensitive area. "Fuck, I knew you'd taste amazing..." His low groan vibrates against you and forces another small gasp to leave you.
Jasper's skilled tongue continues its agonizingly slow exploration, eliciting more breathless sighs and whimpers from you. His grip on your hips tightens as he senses your growing desperation for release.
With a low growl, he suddenly picks up the pace, licking and sucking with purpose. Your back arches as the coil of pleasure tightens, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.
Just as you feel the first tremors of your impending climax, Jasper pulls away, leaving you panting and aching. He gazes up at you with hooded eyes, a smug expression on his face.
"Not yet, darlin'," he murmurs, his voice dripping with dark promise. "I have other plans for you."
Jasper's hands grip your hips firmly as he effortlessly maneuvers your body, guiding you to bend over the sturdy table. A gasp escapes your lips at the sudden change in position.
With your upper body pressed against the cool surface, you feel impossibly exposed and vulnerable. The long-forgotten books and scattered papers crinkle under your weight as Jasper's powerful frame looms over you, his presence radiating a primal dominance.
A shiver runs down your spine as his fingers trail along your spine, eliciting goosebumps in their wake. Leaning in close, he places a series of searing kisses along the back of your neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin before pulling back and undressing.
Trembling with anticipation, you arch your back, silently begging for more of his touch. Jasper growls low in his throat, the primal sound sending a shiver down your spine. His large palms slide up your sides, calloused fingers caressing the curve of your waist.
You whimper, desperate for him to finally fuck you.
Jasper chuckles, the deep rumble of his voice sending sparks of desire through your body. "So impatient," he murmurs, his breath hot against your ear. "Don't worry, sugar, I'm just getting started."
Jasper's grip on your hips tightens as he slowly, teasingly, presses his body against yours. You can feel the hard lines of his muscles and you ache to have him inside you. His hands slide up your sides, caressing and exploring your body.
Finally, after what feels like ages, he lines his cock up with your sopping pussy and starts to press in.
You gasp, arching your back as the head of his cock teases your entrance. "Jasper!" You moan, shuddering with anticipation.
Slowly, agonizingly slowly, he slides into you, inch by delicious inch. You feel every millimeter of his legnth as he fills you up, stretching and claiming you. His grip on your hips tightens, and you can feel the way his forearms bulging as he struggles to maintain control.
"Fuck," he growls, finally bottoming out inside you. He holds still for a moment, his lips pressing against your neck as he regains his breath.
Then, without warning, he begins to move, pulling almost all the way out before plunging back in with a force that takes your breath away. Over and over, he thrusts into you, his hips slapping against yours in a rhythm that is both primal and possessive.
You drop your head to the table, letting out a long, keening cry as you feel his cock hit your sweet spot, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body. "Jasper!" You cry out, your voice echoing in the room.
His hands move to your breasts, tweaking and pinching your nipples as he fucks into you harder and faster. You can feel the heat building between your legs, the sensation growing more intense with each passing moment.
"I knew you were a submissive little thing," he says between grunts. "We could've gotten here a lot quicker if you had just dropped the act earlier, darlin'." You can feel his shit eating grin against your shoulder.
"Really?" you gasp out, body sliding against the table with each thrust. "You want to argue about that now?"
His chuckle is low in your ear. "Just making a point, sugar." Jasper presses a kiss to the space just behind your ear before leaning back and fucking into you harder.
The rough wood of the table bites into your shoulders, but you don't care. All that matters is the feeling of him inside you, claiming you.
"Jasper," you moan, your voice filled with pleasure and desperation. "I need… I need you to cum inside me." You beg, your back arching impossibly more as he reaches around to toy with your clit.
He picks up the pace even more, slamming into you over and over again. "Almost there, doll," he says, his voice rough with lust. "Just wait for it."
You clench around him, trying to draw him deeper inside you. The sensation is almost too much to bear, but you're so, so close.
You feel your body tense and then release in a wave of pure pleasure. Your muscles clench around Jasper's cock, milking him as you experience your orgasm. A loud moan escapes your lips, and your hips buck against the table unconsciously. Sweat beads on your forehead, and your skin feels flushed with heat.
As your climax subsides, you feel a cool rush between your legs. Jasper's release. He groans deeply, his body shuddering against yours.
After a minute of him staying plastered to your back, keeping you bent over the table, you feel him slowly pull out of you, and you can't help but whimper in disappointment.
"Don't give me any of that, doll," Jasper gently chides. He scoops you up in his arms, cradling you against his chest. You wrap your legs around him, holding onto him tightly. The chill of his skin against your heated sex is comforting, soothing the ache.
He carries you to the couch, setting you down gently before standing up and pulling his boxers on and heading into the kitchen. While he's gone, you take the opportunity to catch your breath and compose yourself. When he returns, he has a damp cloth. He gently cleans between them, his touch soft and careful as he wipes up the remnants of your tryst. Neither of you speak as he cares for you, reveling in the comfortable silence that blankets the both of you.
Once your cleaned up, he helps you redress; he helps you pull your panties back on along with his shirt. He scoops you up into his arms again as he lays on the couch. As you curl against him once more, he kisses the top of your head. "There's my good girl," he whispers. "I've got you."
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kedreeva · 18 days ago
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Hi Ked! Having chickens when I finally get my own place has been something I've wanted for a while (am currently putting it on hold despite in the near future acquiring said own place due to H5N1). However, I have become a little enamored of quail recently in comparison. My goal would be to have eggs and fluffy yard buddies, do you recommend either one over the other?
If you want birds that can free roam your yard, it can't be quail. They are game birds, like pheasants, and will just leave (or get immediately eaten by.... everything, but especially hawks and domestic cats.
If you don't mind having them contained, then 100% quail are a better option right now.
Quail don't take up nearly the same space; an average sized quail tower takes up approximately a 2x3 foot space, and depending on how many levels you have and how densely you populate them can hold anywhere from 15-40 quail. That amount of space cannot even house 1 chicken long term.
Quail are not NEARLY the same initial investment; on average people end up investing around $200-500 in quail equipment/caging/birds depending on how into it you want to get, and $2k+ in appropriate chicken equipment/caging/birds. These costs can vary greatly depending on how handy you are and what connections you have to acquire scrap materials, or how fancy you want to get.
Since quail are not kept on raw ground, they have MUCH fewer health problems on average- they rarely get parasites, they rarely pick up bacterial infections, they rarely pick up anything viral (and if their caging is kept in a more enclosed/covered space there is almost no chance of them picking up HPAI). Since they're contained, there's not very much chance for them to injure themselves (although like any bird, if there's a way they have the will to find it).
Their eggs are more nutritionally dense than chickens. You can compare nutrition per gram anywhere online.
They're (in my experience) more consistent layers than chickens; give them light and feed, and they will lay daily year round, only taking a break to molt in the fall.
Quail's full lifespan is shorter than chickens. This may seem like a downside, but the productive years for a chicken are generally 2-5 years, with a lifespan that should be 7-12 years. Quail have the same 2 years of production, but on average only live 3-5 years, so even if you don't want to butcher the spent hens (which most people do), you aren't caring for nonproductive birds for many years.
Quail are easy to butcher at home with almost no equipment- all you need is a hefty, sharp pair of kitchen shears, a 5g bucket (with or without a liner), and some ice water in a big bowl. No plucking, no scalding, no killing cones, nothing special for cleaning. They can be packed for freezing whole in vacuum sealed sleeves.
If you get or build rollout cages, the eggs gently roll to the front of the cage and "out" into the tray, where they can be picked up clean!
If you get or build wire-bottom cages, you don't technically have to buy bedding. Cost efficient! You can provide resting boards or have solid-bottom portions of the cage, and giving them a sand bath bin will be REALLY exciting for them.
Coturnix quail come in such a huge variety of color and patterns that you can surely find some type you like.
Both species can come with aggression issues- it takes FAR less time to breed it out of quail because they hit breeding age in a matter of weeks, not months.
The downside to quail is that most coturnix quail are not terribly cuddly. you might be able to imprint one (I did once, because my pigeons hatched him and then didn't like that, so I took Robert in), but the majority will just be cute look-don't-touch birds. They are FASCINATING to watch though, so it works out imo.
the downside to both species is. the roosters crow. terrible noises in both cases. I couldn't handle chicken roosters.
Anyway, I think that in all honesty, when MOST people are considering getting into chickens, what they ACTUALLY want is the experience of having quail. Small, cute, easy to handle/raise, genetic manipulation through generations of selective breeding easy to hatch, cute eggies. There's a LOT of people getting into chickens right now because they think it will be a solution to the expensive eggs in the supermarket, but it won't be. They'll end up spending more on the chickens than they ever would have on just getting eggs, and throw a stone in a chicken group on fb and you'll hit 17 people who have had horrific health issues related to parasites, illness, injury, predation, etc.
Meanwhile.... quail groups are largely chill and questions are usually about colors and feed/housing (since most of the problems are bad feeding habits or caging, or genetic issues).
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michellesneptune · 4 months ago
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HOW THE MOON SIGNS ACT WHEN THEY LOVE YOU pt. 2
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cancer moon/4h
ultimate cuddlers!!!
this is really biased and feral but i feel like people are here for the tea??
although i think they can be extremely sweet and loving, my opinion remains the same: not all cancers are to be trusted. i think it’s heavenly to be in their good graces, but i also feel like the closer you get, the harder it becomes to be genuinely accepted by them. that is, of course, if they don’t see you as fully deserving of their love. i have yet to be in a relationship with a cancer sun/moon that gives me their full trust. i always feel like they’re frugal with their love towards me. their intentions seem a little hmmm unclear? like they will not speak up about something they don’t accept about you but slowly, in their hearts, they turn away from you??
i am of course speaking solely from my experience. moon is at home in cancer, embodying the archetype of Demeter — the goddess of fertility. when Demeter gets back her beloved daughter, she blesses the whole earth with months of fertile spring. however, when things don’t go her way and Persephone returns to Hades, everyone has to suffer from her sadness during the barren winter months.
if they perceive you as a really worthy partner, they will spoil you with affection. nevertheless, i’d rather not get the short end of their stick!
leo moon/5h
leos have this innate need to feel proud of their lovers. potential partners should possess the it factor about them, da special sparkle. this also applies to their friends! it makes sense, as the sun in them shines so bright, they want their people to illuminate as brightly.
i believe their standards are even higher than virgos’ or capricorns’ and it’s not talked about enough! leos will not engage with just anyone! they have this splash of royalty in them, they can sense a weak self-esteem from a mile.
they want to be able to talk and talk and boast about you. and they want you to make them feel like the only girl in the world.
but here’s the clue. if they feel like you’ve become too boring, their loyalty won’t let them break up with you but slowly the flames stop burning. i’ve seen this happen in a leo moon-taurus moon relationship which makes sense, as taurus prefers persistent, daily acts of service that build a steady, reliable love over time, whereas leo lives for the drama, for the promise of an eternal love, big displays of affection, achieving greatness together.
i’m so sorry if this sounds harsh. i find leo placements to be lovely, all the people i hold dearest to me have them (it’s my descendant sign!). they’re so so open and warm, nearly everything is easy with them.
scorpio moon/8h
i need a scorpio moon friend right. now.
they seem like small, adorable babies who will give up everything for the true, devoted love. their feelings’ depth knows no bounds. extremely loyal, obsessive in the best way possible, what they seek in the other person is a safe haven to hide all their emotions in.
they’re portrayed as very secretive and closed off, even manipulative, but inside they are dying to show somebody their real self. because yeah, behind the darkness there is a small sleepy kitten i feel like.
also here’s the thing: they didn’t choose the darkness, it chose them. their intensity is draining for you, but it’s them who have to deal with it non stop. their emotions are turbulent and it’s often hard to be peaceful, but if you’re willing to accept them as they are and share your own darkest vulnerabilities, they’re yours forever.
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aquarius moon/11h
these natives are the best of friends that you could ever wish for! they’re extremely invested in their friend groups, always making sure to initiate contact and check in. they need this as much as they need to breathe and eat! as we know, aquarius is traditionally ruled by saturn, so maybe that’s why they act like glue, keeping their friendships alive, not letting the bonds fall apart as they often sadly do without proper nourishing!
in this situation though, a hierarchy is formed and, sorry to inform the hoes, you come after bros :((.
these guys can be so unpredictable with their feelings i guess there’s no formula on how to get them. i would say befriend them first and then be eccentric enough to still spark the electric interest, the one that they seek in potential partners.
what’s worth noting is the fact that aquarius is a fixed sign, so whatever their quirks may be, they ultimately are loyal and devoted. they are a great paradox and even if they seem detached, they pay attention to their surroundings. whom they need is a persona as big as theirs, someone that shares their passion for the world and everything it has to offer, preferably concerned with big ideas and humanitarian causes. they notice magic in the mundane so their spouse needs to be special as well! when they find you and you find them, you become their person.
the bond they create with lovers might seem unusual to those of more traditional views. aquarius natives need their time away and a lot of solo time to detach and recharge. however, in turn, they will blow your mind with extraordinary thoughts and you will never look at life the same!
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ninikrumbs · 20 days ago
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This love
pairing: spencer reid x reader. pure fluff. spencer reid is a yearner of the highest order. established relationship. First spencer reid fic, hope I got it right. Summary: After a long and exhausting case, Spencer's feet leads him right to your doorstep. word count: 900 words.
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Spencer stared up at your apartment building, specifically at your dark apartment window. Considering how late it was, the streets were silent and the air was crisp. He felt like a stalker, but after such a long and exhausting case, his feet somehow led him straight here. To you.
But it was midnight, you were probably asleep, tired from your own day job so he didn’t wanna disturb you no matter how much he just wanted to melt into your embrace and hear you say his name in that tender way only you knew how.
For now, this was enough. It was enough to have you close by even if you were three floors away. Just the thought of your slumbering form under the warm covers comforted him, chasing away the monsters that often plagued his mind after a case. You had that power over him. Your touch was magic, and your arms a solace. He didn’t believe in any religion, but if there was a God out there, he’d thank him endlessly for sending you his way.
Morgan would most likely tease him for being so pathetic, but he didn't care. In fact he prided himself in how gone he was for you, because how lucky a man could he be to experience this soul consuming type of love.
His gaze never strayed from your window, you blinds swaying slightly from the breeze. Maybe another hour or two, then he’d leave. He’ll definitely see you tomorrow.
“Spence?”
His head snapped to the sound of your voice so quickly, he wouldn’t have been surprised if he heard a crack. There you were under the streetlights,a plastic bag in hand, in your sleep shorts and your-or should he say his oversize hoodie. Your hair was a bit of a mess and there wasn’t trace of makeup on you face. Yet, you were absolutely beautiful and it took it his breath away every time.
It only took him two long strides to get you, strong arms immediately pulling you into his chest. The sigh of relief he let out was palpable, his worries melting away as he breath you in, leaning down to tuck his face into your neck. You drop your plastic bag, and try to hug him back as best as you could in his tight embrace.
Once he was temporarily sated, -because lets be honest, he will never be able to have his fill of you— it could have been minutes or hours, he didn’t know. He pulled back just enough to see your face, one hand caressing your cheek, the other holding you by your waist. “What are you doing outside?”
His tone wasn’t accusatory or demanding, it was soft and gentle, and genuinely curious and worried as to why your walking the streets alone in the middle of the night.
You smile softly, leaning into his touch, amusement dancing in your eyes. “I should be asking you that, Spence.”
“I-” He could feel the blood rush to his ears and cheeks, “-I wanted to see you.”
Smiling cheekily, you gave his forehead a light tap with your pointer finger, “Why didn’t you call me then?”
“I thought you were asleep so I didn’t wanna disturb you.”
You tilt your head, “Yet you came anyway?”
He smiled bashfully, a bit embarrassed that you found out about his stalkish tendencies. “I wanted to be close to you regardless.”
You stared at him in disbelief, “Oh, Spence.”
Standing on you tiptoes, you wrapped you arms around his neck, pulling him close once more. His hands found your waist as he leaned his chin on your shoulder with his eyes fluttering shut.
“Long case?” You whisper softly against his neck. He hums in response.
You ran a hand through his curly locks. “I'm here.”
Those two words made him hold on to you tighter. You were here. And it made a world of difference,
After a moment, you pulled away and grasped his hand, “Lets go inside.”
“Okay.” His eyes land on your plastic bag, finally noticing it. His refined senses don’t seem to work as fast around you. “Did you go to the convenience store?”
You grinned, “Yeah, I couldn’t sleep so I decided to buy some unhealthy convenience store food.”
He felt bad for thinking this, but he could help but be a little happy that you couldn’t sleep.
Once inside your apartment, your eyes traced over Spencer’s relaxed state as he pulled out the contents of your food haul on the kitchen counter, a big comparison to the tension in his body when you saw him standing in front of your building.
“Hey, Spence?”
“Yeah?”His big hazel eyes met yours and your almost forgot what to say.
Making your way to his side, you leaned your head on his shoulder as you intertwined both of your fingers together. His hand almost swallowing yours whole. The sight making you smile. “Next time you wanna see me, just call me, okay?”
“You don’t have to do that.”
You raised your head and looked at him seriously, “You’re right, I don’t, but I want to do this, Spence. Because you have to know, I want to see you just as much as you want to see me. I doesn’t matter what time it is, text me, call me, or throw a rock at my window. Anything works.”
He laughed at the last one, “Throw a rock? Won’t we wake your neighbors?”
“I don’t really care.” Its true, you don’t care because if this man needs you, you will damn be there.
His smile widened into a grin as he leans into you, pressing his forehead onto yours, hands trailing up to caress your warm cheeks. “I hope you know I don’t deserve you.”
You clasped your hands over his, lifting your chin enough to press a chaste kiss on his lightly chapped lips. “For the first time in your life you’re wrong, Dr. Reid. Your the only one who does.”
AN: Obsessed with criminal minds lately, especially our boy genius.
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yanderedrabbles · 1 month ago
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Letter from your Yandere Valentine
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You. You. It's always been you. Tempting, treacherous you.
God, I hated you at first. Always so pretty, so put together, so fucking alive. You had it all - the friends, the good grades, the effortless charm.
Every damn day I would spend hours imagining what it would be like to have just one day in your body. Just one day where I could be... perfect. Or as close to it as one person can get. You don't get it. You've never had to long for something as much as I have. Never had to be the loser, the kid at the back of class, the one person without a Valentine's card in their locker.
I know you had your own problems too. But it's total bull to say all problems are created equal. What did you have to worry about? Denting daddy's Mercedes?
I hated you. But... I wanted you. I still want you.
We ended up at the same college. I don't think you know that. Thousands of undergrads, why would you notice me? Even if we did go to high-school and elementary together, I was probably just a face in the back of your mind. As unnoticeable and unimportant as any background character.
I thought college would dim your sparkle somehow. Maybe you'd be one of those people who peakin high school and then it's all down hill from there. Chain smoking and cheap liquor and payday loans. I wanted that, honestly. To see you ripped down.
But no. You thrived. Had the picture perfect college experience. When I was stuck working two jobs to cover my tuition, you were studying in some fancy café and going out every weekend. When I was so haggard with stress that I could barely see straight, you were at pilates or out hiking or lounging in a sauna.
How is that fair? Hmm? I put in the work until my hands were fucking raw and all I got for it was minimum wage and leftovers.
And don't get me started on Valentine's. Fucking Valentine's. I'm almost glad they beheaded the guy way back when. I'd do the exact same thing if I could.
Every Valentine's day, you'd have a date. Rarely ever the same person, but somehow all of them had a propensity for huge gestures. Do you remember the one guy who hired a whole horse and carriage for you? Or the girl who took you on a late season ski trip?
Do you want to know what I got for Valentine's? Cafeteria mashed potatoes and mandatory overtime. Romantic, right? I'm swooning at the memory.
I tried to work on myself. Tried to overcome the differences in our birth and get on your level. What an education in disappointment that was. Turns out it's pretty fucking hard to spend two hours at the gym and three in the sauna when you're scheduled to work fifty hours a week and still attend lectures.
You graduated with honours. With a dozen glittering trophies for volunteering and leadership and student organising. You couldn't even hold them all.
I think that was the day I hated you the most. I couldn't stop thinking that should be me.
I thought I was rid of you after that. Thought I could finally go about my life without constantly comparing myself to an impossible ideal. Ha! As if I'd get so lucky.
I saw you again on at the start of February. Newest hire at the office, bright eyed and busy tailed despite the miserable fucking weather.
What are the chances of that? We're both working at the same company, in the same department.
I expected to hate you all over again. But then you introduced yourself to me. Actually shook my hand.
And oh, how I understand those idiots and their grand gestures. Their desperate need to please you.
All my life I've watched you from afar. Seen other people dazzled by you and never fully understood why. Always wondered why I seemed to be the only person bitter and jealous towards you.
I get it now.
You sparkle. You look in my eyes and I feel like I'm part of your world, like I belong in your fancy country club and at your VIP table. When you look at me, I don't feel insignificant anymore.
How do you expect me to let that go? I've spent decades watching from the sidelines and now I finally get a taste. How am I supposed to be normal about it?
I can't let you go. I don't care what it takes, I'm going to be part of your life.
It was always supposed to be me. Not your parade of dates, not your one night stands, none of them. It was always supposed to be me.
Why else would our lives run parallel? Why else can I always find you in a crowded room?
You're meant to be mine. I'm meant to be yours. I don't care what I have to do to make it happen.
Your Valentine,
X.
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gay-dorito-dust · 1 month ago
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I’ve seen fics where Joaquin is hurt, so I thought why not do things a little differently…I’m unhealthy addicted to this man. (Have since the show but didn’t capitalise on writing for him then, grave mistake tbh though there still wasn’t much for him back then either.)
The mission with Sam and Joaquin was a success but one reckless misstep caused you to be put right into a hospital bed with a uncharacteristically quite Joaquin by bedside, his hands clasped together tightly in front of his face as his beautiful dark eyes seemed distant and unfocused as they gazed at the wall across from him.
‘You can quit mentally going over funeral arrangements for me, I’m still alive to continue being a pain in your ass.’ You tell him once you had awoken, but it seemed as though your attempts of making light of a serious situation only seem to put Joaquin even more in a sour mood.
‘You sure have a weird way of trying to comfort me you know? Making jokes about your own hurt and thinking that I’ll just laugh along?’ Joaquin said as he looked at you, eyes sharp but filled with worry as they looked over your bandaged figure. ‘Is nearly dying really a funny experience for you?’ He then adds rhetorically. It was obvious that you being hurt had more of an affect on Joaquin then it did you, maybe because you had time to be accustomed to how dangerous the job was, which resulted in giving you a weird sense of fucked up humour when you find yourself on the hospital bed.
‘Joaquin-‘ you began as you reached out for his hand but it seemed as though your friend and mission partner wasn’t quite done.
‘Do you know how I felt when I found you hurt?’ Joaquin starts, unable to keep the feelings with him any longer then he already had, hating how helpless he felt upon finding out that you were hiding an injury as serious as this as though you didn’t view yourself as someone valuable. ‘And the fact that you kept it from us, from Sam but most importantly,’ Joaquin paused when he felt himself letting his emotions rise to the surface as tears brimmed his beautiful eyes, ‘you kept it hidden from me, we’re meant to be partners y/n, partners.’ He adds in a way that made you know that what he felt towards you was a lot deeper then you two just being partners.
‘Are we not partners?’ Joaquin asked.
‘Of course we are!’ You replied without hesitation, reaching out and grabbing his hand and intertwining your fingers together. ‘You’re my best friend and the best mission partner I could have ever asked for-‘
‘Then why did you feel the need to hide your hurt from me.’ Joaquin interrupts you, though you noticed how tightly he held onto your hand as though he was scared to let go of you, and in the moment you hated yourself for making Joaquin worry over you like this. You truly were the worst when it came to these things but with Joaquin you wanted to be as transparent as possible with him, expect when it came to needing help and your feelings for him it seems, and you couldn’t help but feed into the idea that due to this Joaquin deserved better…better than you at least.
‘The mission comes first Joaquin you know this as well as I, so why should it matter if I’m hurt or not.’ You said to him, hating how it seemed as though Joaquin could see through you whenever you looked in his dark eyes, bringing you under the impression that he seems to know you better then yourself and you feared that that was the truth. You wish you could hate him but you knew you’d be lying if you ever said that because you knew you’d love the man until you couldn’t, making you fear how far you’d actually go for him and vice versa.
‘Well it matters to me! You matter to me! So sorry for not wanting to watch my best friend and love of my life die on a hospital bed.’ Joaquin exclaims suddenly, taking you both aback by the outburst of repressed emotions but Joaquin pushed through as he moved his hand from your grasp, moving to hold your face within his hands instead as he rests his forehead again yours. ‘Especially not when I have so much to say to you that I should’ve said far, far sooner instead of hiding.’ He adds softer this time as he moved to press a tender kiss your forehead, making you smile softly at the feeling, before pressing his head back against there.
‘And what would those things be my dear falcon.’ You asked analog sheepishly as your hands reached to keep his hands again your face, caressing the backs of them with your thumbs, smiling at how while this wasn’t the ideal place for you to admit your feelings but it didn’t feel any less magical then it did right now.
Joaquin smiles for what felt like the first time since he’s been sat beside you. ‘We’d be here for a really, really long time if we want to go into specifics,’ you both laughed at this, knowing that you would spend just as long listing of the things you loved about him in return, ‘but to keep it short all you need to know is that you’re the best part of me, my better half and the one person who could make me feel like this when I’m under the impression that I could one day loose you forever.’ Joaquin sighed and closed his eyes, leaning further into you as though trying to convince himself they you were still here with him.
‘I don’t ever want to see you like this ever again, not as long as I can do something about it to keep you safe from this day onward.’ Joaquin admits and you felt yourself becoming warm and giddy it made you forget why you were in the hospital for brief moment in time, for you were too focused on the beautiful and brave man in front of you holding you like you were everything and to him you very much were.
‘Then I can only promise to be more carful on missions from here on out if it’s to keep your heart from breaking, for I wouldn’t want to hurt someone as important to me as you Joaquin,’ you then moved your hand to wipe away the unshed tears from his eyes, taking your time with it as well as you caressed his tear stained cheeks with care and held the weight of a death as though you were in fact scared of hurting him. ‘I never went to see you shed a single tear more of my reckless ass.’ You add and this time Joaquin laughed along with you as he kissed your palms sweetly, smiling against them.
‘Then I guess you’ll have to deal with me being a little overprotective on the future missions.’ Joaquin says barely above a whisper.
‘I wouldn’t mind that at all, not a single bit.’ You replied, kissing his nose and smiling, happy to know that your feelings weren’t unreciprocated like you originally thought, but also happy knowing that your heart was in the safest hands you’ve ever known.
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