#you really DO have to be delusional to see more to it than that...
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hiii, can I request a fluffy and angsty college au of jealous Semi(player 380) x reader like where the reader is younger than Semi and has a crush on her for a long time. However, Semi rejects the readerâs confession or like doesnât care abt the reader bcoz of her popularity or for other reasons (you may choose). Then, the reader starts spending time with someone else, which makes Semi(player 380) jealous and prompts her to try to win the reader back. Thank you so much in advance, and I love your writing!!!
Thank you! Iâll try mixing the two a bit cause it sounds interesting
Tw: angst ig? And maybe some
Cursing
Se mi x gn! Reader
College au
You sighed in the hallway tugging your books
Should you do it? Should you tell *her*?
Se mi your first and only ever crush maybe you were delusional I mean she was only like two years older then you but still! You have a chance
You were friends with herâŚ..to an extent I mean
She stared at you for more then three minutes that one time! There was hope maybe-
âYou arenât thinking about Se mi again are you?â
Your friend piped up walking towards you seeing your sighing they could swear they saw hearts in your eyes
âShh! She might hear you!â *You hushed them down they laughed a bit in amusement*
âY/n no offense or anything but you make it so obvious you stare at her all the time you stumble and stutter when she asks you simple questions youâre justâŚ.â *She looked at you up and down* âA mess.â
You rolled your eyes âWell no help from *you* Iâm finally gonna confess to her!â *Their eyes widened a bit like they were just told the most unbelievable news then erupted into laughter* âYour humorousâŚy/nâ
You rolled your eyes ready to give a glare then they punched your shoulder âIâm just messing Iâm just glad youâre *finally* going for it how long has it been since youâve liked her?â *You pondered in thought taking it seriously* âEight years?â *F/n gave you a thumbs up* âThen why donât you give herâŚâŚeight roses, to show her how long you liked her?â
You smiled at the idea âGeniusâŚâŚwhat if she doesnât accept?â *Your friend immediately covered your mouth* âDonât you DARE start thinking about that stuff listen here y/n youâre gonna go up and confessâŚ..when exactly?â
You shook her off âOk ok! Iâll do it this afternoon where am I gonna get the roses?â *They gave you finger guns* âIâve got you covered babe.â
Just as they said that the bells ringed signalling time for class i waved back with a knowing look and head to chemistry
Ahh chemistry
Se mi was in that class!
You headed in and there Se mi was leaning on her seat hanging around most of her friends
Well half were just people wanting to be her friend but honestly you couldnât blame them Se mi was wellâŚ..there was a lot of things you could say about her
For one she was extremely prettyâŚ..she was awesome at well everything even the stuff she was bad at and she was popular but not meanâŚ
Lucky for you, you were seatmates! Which is why youâve gotten somewhat closeâŚ..in your eyes anyway you often wonder what those pretty eyes of her see you as
The other students headed off to do there own business and the teacher was heading in soon so you smiled at Se mi and she smiled back
âHey y/n whatâs up?â
Your stomach fluttered with butterflies by her simply acknowledging your existence
âHey Se mi youâŚ.busy later?â
She pondered in thought as if she was thinking deeply then she smirked
âMessing Iâm not really do anything why, you need something?â
You felt nervous but you already went front you canât go back âCan we meet at the backyard later? YkâŚ.nothing bad or anythingâ
She twirled a bit of her hair
âSure why notâ
âAlright class!â
That sound cued you both to take your seats she winked at you and class begun
*Time skip to where you meet up with your friend*
Your heart began to race heavily time was getting nearer you really werenât sure if you wanted to do thisâŚ.
Your friend noticed your shaky behaviour and shook their head âHey, you donât have to do thisâŚ.except youâre definitely gonna regret it if you back out now.â
You shook your head âIâm fine. I justâŚneed someâŚ.did you get the roses?â *Your friend winked playfully and handed them out to you*
âThank youâ *You stared at the eight roses for how long youâve liked herâŚ.wow you really have liked her too long huh*
âWhat time is it now?â *You spoke out of the blue your friend pondered in thought* âSome time between the afternoon definitelyâ *Panic began to erupt in you* âShoot! I asked Se mi to meet up with me around this time Iâve gotta go!â
You ran out before your friend could even comprehend what happened
You reached the backyard of the school and Se miâŚwasnât there? That relieved you for a secondâŚ.maybe it was early?
You realised your phone was in your pocket so you checked the time and it wasâŚâŚâ3pm?â
You noticed Se mi walking with some of her friends and you instantly hid the roses behind your back while walking up to her
âHey Se miâŚcould you excuse us for a bit?â *You tried to ask her friends nicely a load of them seemed confused or irritated but they shrugged off and walked off Se mi quirked an eyebrow*
âUm Se mi remember i asked you to meet up? Itâs okay if you forgot! Was askingâ
Se mi looked confused then realisation came upon her and laughed a bit
âOh yeah i forgot about thatâŚ.sorry about it canât be that serious though like you said what is it?â
It honestly kinda hurt you even though you told her it didnât when she said she forgot but whateverâŚ..âUm wellâŚ.â *You handed her the roses and she stopped staring at them* âIâve liked you forâŚ..eight years. Iâm not good with romantic lines soâŚ.i just want you to know if youâŚ.perhaps feel the same way?â
Se mi then sighed thinking and pacing âFuck y/n this isâŚ.kinda..youâve liked me that long?â *You nodded almost shamefully* âThis isâŚ.kinda awkward iâŚ..Iâm sorry but iâŚ..youâŚIâll be upfront cause i trust you but I donât feel the same wayâ
If your heart could it would have shattered in the moment but you just stood there your brain was screaming with random things you couldnât make out âOhâŚ.â âIâm sorryâŚâ
You forced a smile âNo itâs okay we can still be friends i hopeâŚ.right?â
She smiled back âYeah I donât let things like this get awkward with friendships welll see ya laterâŚI hope youâre okay these roses are pretty thoughâ
The two of you walked separate ways and just as she led the tears threatened to spill you felt like a fool a dummy a stalker all bad things and you couldnât get them out of your head
You met up with your friend who was ready to cheer excitedly then noticed your gloomy behaviour
âOh no babeâŚ.that happened Iâm sorry-â *The second you reached to her you began to sob uncontrollably. You felt like a crybaby that you couldnât just take it well maybe then she would have liked youâŚ.*
Your friend walked you back to you and their dorm and gave you a bunch of blankets and tissues and whatever else you like
âIâllâŚgive you some time.â
You lied down in bed and processed everything i mean itâs not like she humiliated you or anything itâs justâŚâŚ.i mean what were you expecting honestly? âNow she probably thinks Iâm a freak for liking her that longâŚ.â *You couldnât help but say and think these things are true i mean what if they are?!*
Eventually you got worned out and passed in a blissful sleep
Eventually once you woke up you felt a sudden dreadâŚ..why?
Oh yeah your crush rejected you
And that you had to face her today
I mean you said it right? You donât wanna make it awkward honestly you regret saying that maybe avoiding her was betterâŚ.
You honestly didnât know
*As you got up and brushed your teeth and hair and got ready your friend was tying their shoes and went up to you*
âHeyy y/nâŚ.you doing okay?â
*You simply stared at them and they got the hint were you supposed to be okay?*
âSoâŚdo you plan on talking to her?â
*You sighed*
âI mean I told her it was fine soâŚ.i donât wanna make it awkward so i might as well try to act like Iâm fineâ
*Your friend stared in empathy*
âWellâŚIâm sure after this day youâll be fineâŚitâs just a day right?â
You sighed and forced a small smile
âYouâre rightâ
You headed out and even if people werenât it felt like people were staring at youâŚis it anxiety is it real? You didnât know and that made you even more scaredâŚ.
Luckily one of your later classes were with se mi so you had all day to prepare to see her which you did
*Time skip to your second or third class*
It was time. You were gonna see Se mi
You took a breath and walked into class trying to seem as normal as possible and there was Se mi
Leaning on the chair just talking to her friends she noticed you and smiled like usual
âHey y/n we were just talking about the teacher giving us an extra strict lectureâŚ.teachers sure are funnyâ
You force a smile you didnât wanna make things awkward she didnât deserve that
âReally? Wow they probably just want us to learnâŚâ
Se mi snorted a bit and talked to you as if yesterday never happenedâŚ.
It sorta relieved but upsetted you at the same time like wow it hit hard
She really doesnât like you back. A truth you finally have it fully hit
After some time the teacher came in and you sat next to Se mi youâd normally be thrilled to be seatmates with her but right now? You donât feel like youâre ready to face herâŚ.
*Another time skip Iâll just make it short*
The day was mainly just you trying to make se mi know or atleast think things were cool between you two eventually the day ended and you felt drained and you barely did anything
You layed down in bed thankfully tomorrow was a weekend most people would leave to visit families you planned on staying you can use this to relax all day
Eventually that day came by and well you were a mess
You groaned as your friend turned on the lights in your face
âOh come on y/n thatâs enough petting! Itâs been two days you have to be strong nowâ
You only stared at her blankly
âWell what am i supposed to do? Get over it?â
You friend pondered like what if they were about to say was bad âWell you could you know get over it..â
You sighed âWell obviously I should butâŚ.i loved herâŚ.â
Your friend had a small pitied look
âWellâŚthereâs plenty of people around I donât know try making a new friend or somethingâŚâ
You sighed then got up as if you suddenly got a burst of energy âOkayâ
You got ready and headed out and went outside in the backyard and a student happened to be sitting on your usual spot
You mentally decided this was the perfect time to make a friend! Who knows maybe something else could happenâŚ.
âHey this is my usual spot nobody usually goes around hereâŚ.names y/nâ
The person shot there head up âI donât see your name on it.â *they smirk a bit jokingly*
You scoff smiling a bit âI basically claimed it pleaseâŚ.you got a name?â
They smiled âIâll let you guess starts with A ends with Zâ
Se miâs pov
Se mi just left her dorm ready to do whatever she wants in her free time
Her mind wandered to y/n oh y/nâŚ..was interesting
Se mi wondered why she was so interested in being around themâŚ.they confused her in a good way
Like she felt like she missed something rejecting them and still wanted them around her? Usually if she rejected someone sheâd atleast distance herself a bit for their sake
But for y/n? She wanted them around even moreâŚ..strange
Speaking of y/n wonder where they are anywayâŚ.might catch up a bit she was worried where they were yesterday
Just as she thought that while heading outside she saw y/n! AndâŚ..some person sheâs never seen
She wouldnât have been bothered if it seemed like the two or atleast the other person wasâŚ..flirting?
Wait why is she bothered! Y/n is free to do whatever they want!
ButâŚ.eh whatever
She headed over anyways
âHope Iâm not interrupting anything.â
The two turned to Se mi
Y/n laughed a bit âUh hey Se mi this isâŚ.a new studentâ
âHey! I just said Iâve been here awhile i just didnât talk much to othersâ
Y/n rolled your eyes playfully Se mi quirked an eyebrow
âWell what classes are you in?â
She couldnât help but question
âClearly in none of yoursâ They laughed a bitâ
Se mi tried not to frown she didnât like this persons attitude
âHey she asked you a question!â Y/n playfully giggled
Se mi tried to hold back whatever these feelings were âHey so guys wanna hang out?â She mainly gestured it to y/n
Y/n nodded smiling while the other person shrugged giving a small smile
Oh boy
Itâs been a week now and the two pair have gotten really close each time Se mi saw them her stomach twisted in a way she didnât seem to get was she jealous? If so why? She rejected you why-
âHey y/nâ *Se mi approached them*
âOh hey Se mi barely talked in awhileâ *Y/n smiled while Se mi felt bad*
âYeah itâs just that guy hasâŚ..whatâs there name?â
âWonât say itâs a joke of theirs!â *Y/n giggled a bit Se mis eye twitched*
âYeah well have they ever said anything? Like about you know serious stuff justâŚâŚ.looking out for youâ
Y/n quirked an eyebrow âNot sure it matters but there flirty a lot but Iâm assuming their jokes most of the time..â
Se mi deadpanned you âmost?â
Your pov again
Se mi kept on backing you into a corner asking you questions about you and him you had enough
âOkay Se mi youâre acting weird just why are you so bothered?!â
âCause I like you!â
Your heart paused
Se mi seemed confused by the words she said then had a serious look
âYeah i do and Iâm sorry it took me a simple jealousy fit to figure it outâŚâ
You didnât know what to say was this a dream all you did was kiss her
âWill that help you figure it out?â
She nodded smiling âIâm sorry for whatever pain i put you throughâ
âShut up! Iâm still thinking whether if this is a dream or notâ
Soo the ending is kinda rushed but i hope itâs worth it also happy late new years!
#x reader#character#fanfiction#squid game#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game season 2 x reader#y/n#Se mi#Se mi x reader#squid game se mi#squid game season 2 Se mi#squid game se mi x reader#squid game season 2 se mi x reader
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Astro Observations: How did my 2024 Solar Return chart manifest for me? (First Astro Post!! :3)
(Disclaimer, I am not an astrologer just a silly girl that knows a ton of information on astrologyđ¤)
10h Taurus moon- I was SO lazy. So tired like a lot of the timeđ. Honestly didnât really do much during this time & still donât LOL.
10h stellium- Felt very out of place in public settings. A huge theme this year revolved around feeling uncomfortable being perceived in the public eye. I think the context of how this stellium shows up more through the moon ,chiron, & northnode being there. No career changes⌠(yetđ
, i still have 3 months left until next sr!)
Cancer Rising- The first few monthsâŚ.I. Was. A. Wreck. I cried so much it was crazy. I was so emotional and moody throughout this entire year for sure.
5h vertex & 5h ruler in 7h- Experienced a fated romantic encounter. This was also in an Aries degree, and this relationship moved very quickly, and ended just as quick.đ¤
7h Aquarius pluto- Pluto here adds more context into the type of partners that i would surround myself this year. I had two pretty transformational relationships, where the person i was getting to know had mental struggles. This was also in aries degree too and both of the relationships started very intensely & moved fast. Also met both of them online!!
Pluto Sextile Venus- With pluto aspecting 9h venus (which i have natally too!) I did attract partners that were of a different ethnicity than me, were some form of long distance relationship , and one of them even drove 95 miles just to see meâŚ
Pluto sextile Vertex- And Pluto aspecting vertex encouraged the narrative of a fated âintenseâ or obsessive relationship dynamic being brought to me this year.
Descendant @ 24°- I have 5h neptune natally so I already idealize and see what I want to see in relationshipsđ. But having this in a pisces degree?! Looking back on it now, I can speak on just how truly delusional I was over these ppl LOL.
Thank you guys so much for reading!! I have been in the Tumblr astro community for years now, and wanted to give my spin on astrology observations :)
I hope you guys enjoyed my first post. âĄ
#astro placements#astro community#astrology observations#astro observations#solar return#solar return chart#solar return chart observations
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this may be a bit random, but could you write something for Choi Wook-Seok (the guy who plays rock, paper, scissors, minus one + helps with the search)
Iâve seen nothing about him online at all but I really liked him (maybe Iâm just delusional)
It would be amazing if you could do something where the reader was an ex coworker (or just a friend) of Jun Ho and gets pulled into the little take down mission from episode 2. There she meets Wook-Seok and he gets really flustered around her or something.
thank you so much and good work on all your fics
Woo-Seok - Flustered
Synopsis: Woo-seok thinks you're really pretty and gets quite shy
A/N: Sorry this took so long to post i've been drowning in requests!!
Warnings: none
âSo, just to clarify, you want me to join you to kidnap some guy who is apparently hosting death games and killing hundreds of people yearly on an unknown island?â you speak as you look at Jun-ho. When your old friend texted you asking to meet, you thought he had wanted to go out for a coffee and catch up - not try to convince you to help him find some guy running some deadly game on an island he's been trying (and failing) to find for two years now.
âI know how it sounds but Iâm not making this up,â he says as he looks at you with a serious look. Jun-ho was well aware that his story sounded like the words of a mad man but there was really no way to not sound crazy talking about something like this. He was hoping that you'd just trust him and agree to this because your help would be valuable to getting this done.
You could see the look on his face that showed he clearly wasn't joking around and was dead serious about needing your help with this. However, as much as you did want to help him, you werenât a police detective anymore. You had quit long ago and taken up a different job that didnât put you in any danger. Something like this could be seriously dangerous and result in the harm of a lot of people. You let out a sigh as you ran a hand through your hair.
âJun-ho. As much as I want to help, you know I donât do that stuff anymore. I left it behind me years ago,â you say as you look at him with an apologetic look. You werenât confident that you could just jump back into work like this. After all, if he was telling the truth, this would be a lot more than just a simple kidnapping and arrest. Itâd be an all-out war - the one thing you wanted to avoid.
Jun-ho understood where you were coming from but he didnât want to give up on you. When you used to work together in the police department, you were an excellent detective. You had a talent and it was being wasted for things that didnât matter. This mattered. âJust keep watch then. You donât have to come with us inside. I just need the skill I know you have to help us,â He says as he puts a comforting hand on your shoulder.
You stayed quiet for a few moments as you just looked at him, analyzing him to figure out whether you should listen to him. Were you really going to join him on a mission to kidnap some potentially dangerous guy? You let out a sigh before looking off to the side with slight annoyance. You took a deep breath before looking at him again. âIâll help,â you say and Jun-ho immediately smiles, glad to have you on his side. He trusted you with his life and he knew you would prove a great help.
He pats your shoulder twice before pulling his hand away. âGood. We're meeting here tomorrow,â he says as he hands you a small piece of paper with an address. You looked down at it and nodded your head slowly. âTime is valuable so be here early,â he adds as he puts his hands into his pockets.Â
âGot it. I'll be there first thing tomorrow morning,â you say as you shove the piece of paper into your pocket and look up at him. Jun-ho nods his head in approval before swiftly walking away and leaving you on your own to think. If Jun-ho hadn't been such a good ally when you worked in the force together, you would've never agreed to this wild goose chase. But, unfortunately, he had done you a favor one too many times so saying no was off the table.
You let out another sigh as you looked to the horizon and thought about what tomorrow might bring.Â
âThey better have guns,âÂ
â§ď˝Ľďž: â§ď˝Ľďž:
The next day, you arrived at the rather strange choice of a meet up place. It looked like a run down motel that offers its rooms for ridiculously cheap to those who couldn't afford anything better. You stare at it for a few moments before heading towards the door. When you went to open it, it didn't budge, so you looked around to see if there was something you could open it with.
Your eyes quickly landed on a camera watching you from above which you decide to wave at in hopes that the door would open for you. Thankfully, it did as you heard a buzz indicating it was now opened. You quickly walked in and began to climb the stairs to the correct floor written on the paper. You could hear the faint sounds of gunshots - something that made you more relaxed because thank god they do have guns in case this goes south.
When you arrived at the correct floor, you could already see Jun-ho waiting outside a room for you. He seemed anything but relaxed and you couldn't blame him. Something like this was a whole other level of dangerous. They pretty much only had one shot at getting this right or else it'd be all over.Â
âThis way. The rest of the team is in here,â Jun-ho speaks as he leads you down the hallway and into a room. When you walk in, the first thing you notice is the shit ton of won lying on a bed. Your eyes widen at the sight as Jun-ho leads you past into the bathroom which was filled with a shit ton of guns. You looked around the small bathroom in slight shock at how prepared they happened to be. You weren't going to ask where they got all these guns from but you could guess they were all illegally obtained from the black market. There was also a lot of ammo for the guns too.Â
Finally, Jun-ho pushes back a blue curtain revealing a hole in the wall that led to a giant space which seemed like it used to be separate rooms before the walls were removed. There were three guys shooting at the targets all the way on the back wall while three other guys stood behind them. They clearly meant business.
Woo-seok noticed the presence of Jun-ho and immediately looked at him. He had yet to notice you standing right behind Jun-ho. âThese guys were in the marine corps!â he shouts out as he looks over at Gi-hun with wide eyes. He was rather impressed with himself for managing to make a team with professionals.
âThese guys were in the UDT,â he shouts again while walking forward and gesturing to two other guys. âand these guys were in the ROK Special Forces,â he finishes as he gestures to the last two guys. âOh, and this guy is just a former cop,â he says as he points at Jun-ho.Â
âMe too,â you say, making Woo-seok snap his head towards you. He immediately froze up. He recalled Jun-ho saying that he'd bring an old coworker and friend but he didn't think that he'd bring someone as pretty as you. You had him rendered speechless so quickly and suddenly, he was very aware of the people looking at him.Â
âThis is my co-worker. I told you about her,â Jun-ho says as he steps back a little so you could have some space to reveal yourself. âShe was great at her job when we worked together so she'll be a big help,â he adds. Gi-hun seems to nod his head before looking back at the men shooting but Woo-seok couldn't tear his eyes away from you.
â..Is there something on my face?â you ask as you rub your face once-over just in case. You didn't know what he was staring at you for but it was kind of endearing in an odd way. âno! Sorry. I'm Woo-seok,â he quickly introduced himself as he tried to calm down and not grin like an idiot. God, he could feel himself start to sweat.
âGlad to be on the same team,â you say as you hold your hand out for him to shake it. He quickly grabs your hand and shakes it vigorously, taking you by surprise at the suddenness and aggressiveness. âuhm- me too,â he stutters out before quickly pulling his hand back after realizing he was holding yours for a little too long.Â
You stare at him with slight confusion as you couldn't tell what brought along this behavior. He seemed awfully sweaty all of a sudden and his face seemed to flush a reddish color. He could also barely get a word out without stuttering. Usually people only acted like when they had a crush-
Wait. Did he have a crush on you?? He certainly seemed to display all the signs of a potential crush. Maybe you could just ask. Would that be too straightforward? You didn't want to embarrass him, you just genuinely wanted to know if he liked you but asking him out right might be a little much.
âuh- so you used to be in the police department?â He questioned, making an attempt at small talk with you in hopes to hide how nervous he was. He really didn't want to give a bad first impression to a girl so pretty. You nodded your head and started to talk about it but he could barely focus. He was suddenly hyper-aware of everything about him including his mannerisms.Â
Was he smiling too much? Was his stance weird? Did you feel uncomfortable with him looking at you? His mind was too consumed by the thoughts of what you thought about him. He thought about making a joke but maybe you wouldn't find it funny at all and there would be an awkward silence. It was just too much for him to handle. He'd much like to disappear now just to avoid doing something embarrassing in front of you.
â..woo-seok?â You call out as you look at him weirdly. He seemed to be in his own world right now. Something was evidently stuck on his mind. You, probably. You could easily tell how he felt about you. You did use to work as a detective after all. Reading people is what you do. You sigh and shake your head at his nervous behavior before speaking up.
âIf you like me, just ask me out,â you say, making his eyes widen as he snaps out of his trance. He looked at you in disbelief, not entirely sure that he actually heard you correctly. âWhat?â He says as he feels his heart race a million times faster than it had been previously.
âIf you like me, ask me out,â you repeat seriously. You found his shyness quite cute honestly and you actually didn't think you'd be against the idea of going out with him. He really just seemed like a sweetheart.
â..really?â He said as he nervously smiled. He sheepishly rubs the back of his neck with his hand before looking around at the other's. âwell.. if you don't mind..â he says as he looks at you with a hopeful look.
âYou gotta ask me like a man, câmon,â you say playfully as you push his shoulder gently with a smirk. He laughed shyly before taking a deep breath. âOkay,â he says as he composes himself before looking down at you.
âWould you maybe like to go out sometime?â
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I think you missed my point! I'm not trying to say that transmisogyny is strictly directed at trans women. Though I can see how my wording makes it seem I'm trying to say that.
It's just two different words for two different types of experiences with transphobia. Misandry isn't the point of transandrophobia- though I've heard a few convincing arguments that there are *situational* issues with trans men having to deal with actual literal terfs. But that's not so much the issue that gets talked about with this.
Like- my core experience as a trans man, is being denied masculinity, and being treated like shit for BEING a man. Yeah, some of this can be connected to misogyny- but there's something very very different about growing up in extremely right wing environments. Not being allowed to cut your hair short, not being allowed to dress masculine, having horrible things done to me specifically because I am presenting as a man- something that I am not supposed to have access to.
I used the "two sides of the same coin" because it feels like it fits for this discussion. This isn't a mirror of transmisogyny- its intrinsically tied to it in some really awful ways! Both with the transphobia element- and the misogyny element.
Two sides of a spectrum of experiences with transphobia.
Actually- I'm trying to recall the username of the person I spoke to about this, hopefully she sees and can add on- she spoke about how being a butch trans lesbian has given her experience with both transmisogyny and transandrophobia- because presenting as a butch woman brought on hatred both for being a woman, AND presenting in a masc nature within her womanhood.
The way she explained it was very nice, I feel like im doing a huge disservice here. Like you said- it's not the opposite of transmisogyny. It's just different.
Two sides, one coin, same horrible root cause (hatred or trans people, gender non-conformity, and a whole garden variety of horrific misogyny)
On the same note, I've dealt with transmisogyny personally, too, as a trans man. So I know for a fact it's not just The Thing For Trans Women Only or Transphobia But Pink- it affects many, many queers in many different ways. As I mentioned before-transandrophobia isn't just for trans guys either.
It's also highly contextual- like. Not everyone is gonna get the same flavor of transphobia directed at them. It varies, sometimes they get mixed- sometimes it's just All the bigotry (racism compounding on transphobia compounding on misogyny compounding on transandrophobia)
And. I think another thing worth bringing up is that the -androphobia is very intrinsically tied to the "trans-" portion of the word. You can't dissect it without going through religious history, and wading through veerrryy specific political climates that lead to some very real very brutal happenings towards trans men, and masculine presenting people. I understand not many people like talking about it, because we automatically assume that everyone everywhere is way more chill with GNC "women" than GNC "men" when in many cultures, many places, if you're GNC at ALL you can be punished or killed for it. Plus there's the added bonus that trans men, and trans mascs up till recent haven't really been talked about all that much.
Actually! That's another good point to kinda show what I mean- trans women get talked about non stop, and it causes enormous issues. They're hyper focused on. Targeted. It's not good- but neither is complete Silence and erasure. Trans men get the other side in this scenario- it's rooted in the same issue (transphobia) but presents itself way different because. No one wants to pay any mind to "delusional little girls". Until they grow beards and get muscles and become a "threat" to "other delusional little girls"
I'm trying to find the best words for all of this. Really my argument is just that it's all intrinsically tied together, and that fighting about what words we use isn't really helpful in the long run. It would be better if we could all just talk about our experiences and find the common ground, give each other support in the areas we may not personally understand.
Anyways, thank you for listening to me ramble. I hope my brain fog today hasn't made this a chore to wade through.
my core issue with the transandrophobia nonsense is that it paints transmisogyny as some kind of âpink transphobiaâ, rather than the intersectional form of oppression that it is
this is especially annoying when the transmisogyny tag get glutted with people talking about how little they care about transmisogyny!
#we arent trying to mirror it. we are literally talking about the same thing!!!!#some of this we are making the same point!!!! i think the way im wording things might not be helping#but i do appreciate the conversation bc you do bring up some good points#i dont like ALL the points EVERYONE tries to make about transandrophobia. but ive found it very helpful in discussing many of my own#experiences dealing with this stuff#like androphobia is VERY real when you are a trans man. you arent supposed to have access to manhood. u are supposed to âstay in your laneâ#like. im not saying WOMEN hold power over men. thats not at all it.#the TRANS part of Transandrophobia is a big and verybimportant modifier to âandrophobiaâ
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midnight - satoru gojo
summary: gojo's new year's resolution is to tell you how he feels, but people keep stealing you away before he gets a chance
warning: fluff, friends to lovers trope, gojo pining after you, a bit of a power dynamic, small amount of angst, kissing
gojo stands near the edge of the room, one hand gripping a glass of something amber and strong, though itâs been forgotten. his other hand rests in pocket, fingers twitching with restless energy. heâs satoru gojoâjujutsu highâs golden boy, the strongest sorcerer, the life of the partyâŚand yet, tonight, heâs anything but.
his sharp blue eyes, usually so carefree and confident, are laser-focused on you standing across the room, leaning into a conversation with a group of his friends.Â
youâve always had this intense power over him, even when you werenât trying. itâs in the way you moveâ completely unaware of how effortlessly you draw people in. itâs in the way you smile, disarming and genuine, making everyone in your orbit feel like theyâre the only person who matters.
but for gojo, itâs your eyes that get him the most. the way you look at him commands his full attention, every time. you see him, really see him, in a way no one else does. and it makes everything else fade away.
youâve caught him staring more than once tonight. each time, he sees that same knowing look in your eye, your lips quirking into a subtle smile that feels like a challenge. like youâre daring him to do something about the way he looks at you.
his grip tightens around the glass. gojo takes a shaky breath, trying to steady himself, but itâs no use. heâs starting to lose his mind.Â
youâve been stolen away from him at least five times tonight. first, it was yuji, grinning ear to ear as he swept you into an animated conversation. then geto had pulled you aside, his smooth charm keeping your attention longer than gojo liked. now, youâre surrounded by a group of people whose names gojo didnât even bother to catch, their laughter mingling with yours in a way that makes his stomach twist in jealousy.
itâs maddening.
every time he musters up the courage to approach you, someone else beats him to it, pulling you away just before he can do the one thing heâs been too terrified to risk for years. every missed opportunity gnaws at him, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth that even his drink canât wash away.
because satoru gojo is in love with you.
he always has been. from the moment you first smiled at him with that effortless warmth, he was all in. but fearâsharp, unfamiliar, and relentlessâhas kept him silent. the thought of losing you, of ruining the bond youâve shared for years, has held him back, no matter how much itâs tortured him to watch you be with other people.
it ached to see you cry on his shoulder over an ex who didnât deserve you. it hurt even more to hear himself giving you advice he wished he could followâadvice he wished he could prove to you himself. but through it all, he stayed the supportive best friend, locking his feelings away and pretending that watching you love someone else didnât shatter him every time.
but tonight, gojo feels different. maybe itâs the champagne fizzing in his veins, making everything feel a little lighter. maybe itâs the delusional bravery that comes with every new year, the promise of new beginnings and the freedom to act on desires that have been bubbling under the surface. or maybe itâs the way you keep looking at him like thatâlike youâre waiting. like you already know.
his chest tightens as he lifts the glass to his lips, downing the drink in one long, burning swallow. he grimaces, but the rush of liquid courage steadies him momentarily.
enough is enough.
glass abandoned on a nearby table, gojo straightens, his towering frame cutting through the crowd with ease as he makes his way toward you. his pulse is pounding, his nerves are screaming, but his eyes stay locked on you, unwilling to let anyone else take you away this time.
âcan i steal her for a sec?â gojo interrupts smoothly as he approaches the group. his tone is casual, but thereâs an edge to itâa subtle claim that leaves no room for argument. his towering frame and commanding presence seal the deal as his hand presses against your back, guiding you away without giving the others a chance to respond.
you let him lead you, a soft smile tugging at your lips as you glance up at him. he feels the warmth of your gaze, the way it lingers, and it does little to calm the pounding of his pulse.Â
âfinally decided to come out of your corner, gojo?â you tease, your voice low and laced with amusement.
âi wasnât in a cornerâ he lies. your raised brow and knowing grin let him know youâre not buying it for a second.
âright. and i wasnât waiting all night for you to talk to meâ you counter smoothly, the challenge in your tone making his stomach flip. the glint in your eyeâmischievous and just a little smugânearly crumbles him. he stammers for a moment, trying to form a response, but nothing coherent comes out.
âyouâve been avoiding meâ your voice drops in volume as you step closer. the intimacy of the gesture steals the air from his lungs.
âi havenâtââ
âyou haveâ your voice is firm, but still laced with that teasing edge that drives him insane. âyouâve been staring at me all night like you want something, and yet, here i am, talking to everyone but youâ.
gojo swallows hard, his throat suddenly dry. youâve cornered him effortlessly, your words peeling away every excuse he might have used to deflect. the way your eyes hold his makes it impossible to look away.
youâve been watching him just as closely as heâs been watching you, dissecting every glance, every subtle shift in his posture. youâve caught him staring more times than you can count, and each time, the slight tilt of your head and that knowing look in your eye made it clear: you know.
you know exactly how much power you have over him.
and youâre enjoying it.
itâs infuriating, the way you have him so completely wrapped around your finger without even trying. but itâs also exhilarating. heâs satoru gojoâuntouchable, powerful, confident. no one has ever left him flustered, never made him second-guess himself. but somehow, youâve brought him to his knees without even trying.
âten... nine...eightâŚâ the crowd begins the countdown, but he barely hears it, drowned out by the pounding of his heart. now, as he stands before you, the room buzzing with energy and the countdown ticking dangerously close to zero, he knows he canât wait any longer. the way youâre looking at himâ like youâve been waiting for him to finally catch upâsends a thrill racing through his veins. itâs the curve of your lipsâthat faint, maddeningly confident smileâthat has him completely at your mercy.
thereâs no time like the present. either he steps forward and starts the new year without regrets, or he lets the moment slip away and risks losing the person most special to him forever.
âthree... two...â
he doesnât wait for âoneâ.Â
without another second of hesitation, gojo pulls you closer, one hand wrapped around your waist and the other cradling your face as though youâre something fragile and precious. his thumb brushes gently against your cheek as he leans in.
the kiss is everything heâs ever dreamed of and moreâsweet, passionate, and filled with longing after years spent second-guessing and holding back. itâs not just a kiss; itâs an apology, a confession, a promise all wrapped into one moment.
your arms slide up instinctively, fingers threading into his undercut, pulling him impossibly closer. the gesture is possessive, grounding, and when you kiss him back with equal fervor, satoru knows heâs a goner.
youâre everything heâs ever wanted but was too scared to ruin. and now, with the taste of your lips on his, satoru is sure heâs addicted. he feels relieved, euphoric, and he wonders how heâs managed without this for so long.
when gojo finally pulls back, your foreheads rest against each other. youâre both breathless, chests rising and falling in unison.Â
âtook you long enoughâ you tease, your voice brimming with warmth. your thumb lightly grazes his bottom lip.
for all his usual confidence, thereâs a vulnerability in the way he looks at you now. his normally playful eyes are earnest, his gaze searching yours as if afraid this moment might vanish, like a dream slipping through his fingers.
âyeah, well⌠i like to keep you on your toesâ satoru quips with familiar cockiness.
the smirk on your lips a reminder of the truth: heâs in your hands. youâve always been the one in control. but tonight, you let him have this moment, let him play at being the one holding the reins.
you hum, the sound low and pleased. the way youâre looking at himâwith affection, amusement, and something he doesnât dare nameâhas his heart racing. for a second, he wonders if his knees might give out entirely.Â
âhappy new year, gojoâ you say. your fingers brush the nape of his neck.
âhappy new yearâ he murmurs back, eyes fixed on yours as if heâs afraid to miss a single second of this.
then, before anyone can pull you away again, before the world outside this moment can intrude, he leans in, stealing another kiss. itâs slower this time, less hurried, but no less consuming. the intensity builds, unspoken feelings spilling over with every shared breath, every gentle press of his lips against yours.
itâs just him, you, and the undeniable connection you can no longer ignore.
when you finally part, both of you breathless, he lingers close, hand cradling your cheeks. thereâs a softness in his gaze now, a vulnerability thatâs rare for him, but is entirely genuine.
as the sound of cheers and laughter signals itâs time to celebrate with everyone, gojo laces his fingers with yours before leading you back toward the others. his grip is firm but gentle. he doesnât let go, not even when youâre surrounded by the lively crowd.
instead, he gives your hand a squeeze, his thumb brushing against your knuckles.Â
heâs determinedâno one is going to steal you away again.
not tonight. not ever.
--
a/n: happy new year, everyone. this is my first fic of 2025!! one of my resolutions is to write more. please send some requests my way!! <3
creds: found on pinterest so iâm not sure who the creator is!
#levisjinchuriki#my works#jjk x reader#jjk#jjk au#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fluff#satoru gojo#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jjk x black reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen fluff#gojou satoru x reader#satoru#jjk satoru#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu gojo#gojo x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo saturo#gojo#jujutsu satoru
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Okay Aarons Angels and Pierre princesses (just came up with those- they sounded cute âşď¸) our love is a hot topic on Twitter (X-I will never call it that) right now because of his J HUD tunnel video and of course while all of us are salivating at how good he looks and his third leg here comes some annoying ass bitch(s) trying to ruin the fun đ first off ppl saw ONE picture of this man with a white woman (the 2nd pic) and all of a sudden he doesnât like black women. Like I understand thatâs itâs annoying and tiring seeing celebrity black men, whether they be actors, athletes, singers, etc., primarily with non black women. And I get that even in tv shows and media itâs hard to find a black woman thatâs not biracial or ambiguous looking as love internet or main character (thatâs a whole other story) but I wish ppl would stop projecting this on to every black male celebrity we find attractive. Iâm not naive. I know that if you look through a manâs dating history (which I have no desire to do with Aaron tbh) or even his likes and follows on social media you can tell his preference. But making assumptions like that off of ONE picture is just ridiculous. And also it really seems like ppl get a kick out of telling black women that the BLACK man theyâre thirsting after would never look their (our) way. Itâs like âha ha yâall think a good looking black man would actually like you black bitchesâ and honestly itâs so disheartening. Like weâre not delusional (I am a little for this man but I still got my sanity đ¤) we know that we will never meet or date this man but damn why canât we enjoy shit in peace as black women. I could understand if he was saying negative shit about black women specifically or seemed to go out of his way to exclude black women but I havenât seen that from him. Itâs like ppl canât wait to tell black women that we are no more than support tokens or meal tickets to our race of men and that the only interest they have in us is âpanderingâ so that weâll support them and give them money. Plus I havenât seen Aaron do any âpanderingâ. Heâs just been doing regular interviews and talking about his work. He hasnât went out of his way to âcaterâ to any particular group in my opinion đ¤ˇđ˝ââď¸ I know this is a lot but this shit just really annoyed me man.
#aaron pierre#rebel ridge#the lion king#mufasa#kelvin harrison jr.#michael b jordan#black panther#black actors#black women#black writers#killmonger#tâchalla#erik stevens#terry richmond
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Some plots that I want to see for Arc 3 before I actually lose my sanity bcs I WILL be throwing hands if Netflix doesn't give us a sign:
Planning for the return of Aaravos (obviously). Claudia's return alongside with it too dont forget. (i wonder how she'll look like)
Callum learning all the arcanums. I feel like this is really important because this will help with defeating Aaravos since it's been shown he knows all primal sources. I want to see Callum at his strongest too it's gonna be so cool ngl.
Aanya and Ezran + Soren and Corvus TOGETHER PLEASE đŻď¸đŻď¸đŻď¸
Kim'dael (or however you say her name) What happened to her? Where is she and why did they completely forget about her existence? I was expecting Rayla to go against her in a battle especially after what she did to her as a kid, but ig we were robbed once again. We could've maybe seen her in a bloodmoon form if that is possible for normal moonshadow elves to do.đ
Claudia either having the most emotional redemption arc (I still have a tiny bit of hope left for my girl), or becoming a full fledged villian. Maybe even worse than Aaravos. No inbetween because as much as I love this show sm, it can be a bit undecided with it's plots here and there.
Rayla finds out she's pregnant. Guys just hear me out. It could be such a good plot, kind of like Twilight: Breaking Dawn. Whilst planning for Aaravos's return, they also have to deal with the first halfling baby that hasn't been seen in Xadia for years (i think), and if it will have more abilities than usual. And I saw on someone's post that it being born at the end could represent the love and a new era between human's and elves. And other than that, it'd be cute seeing everyone stress over Rayla being reckless the entire time. (I'll pray for them all, especially Callumđ)
Zym becoming the new archdragon king. This is another important plot needed because I'm pretty sure he's the only archdragon left. Unless he goes on some sort of journey to see if there are any other archdragons out there to help rule alongside with him. Plus, we legit heard him talk bruh. I NEED MORE OF DRAGON ZUKO!!!
WE NEED ARC 3 ABEG đđžđđžđđž
(these are just my personal thoughts i daydreamed abt delusionally btw, if i have any other ideas I'll do another post at some point)
#the dragon prince#giveusthesaga#continuethesaga#They may as well let me write it tbh#tdp fandom#rayla#rayllum#tdp#tdp arc 3#arc 3#callum#tdp ezran#tdp soren#corvus#aanya#netflix#im way too obsessed with this show its concerning now#WE NEED ARC 3 PLEASEEEE NETFLIX#im acc crying#tdp zym
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Hazbin hotel critcal while i'm happy to have space to express my distaste and grievance but can we please do not be ableist? Not just on psyhical disability but also mental disability like aspd. Because the way people describe character using word as delusional narcisstic psychotic just annoyed me. Then with lucifer look whether people can see him as autistic or neurodivergent or not that would have different respond but why do some people really anti with lucifer being autistic because i remember quite well someone said they don't believe lucifer is autistic because they have brother who is autistic. Another person chime in claiming lucifer can't be depressed because he caused depression mind you i believe this is the same person who accuse lucifer being a groomer!
Moving on with Charlie look i get it she is badly written but i swear people treat her as some kinda monster proceed to demonizer her (i know this is a very weird choice of word) I remember reading one person post about how much they hate charlie they show their blood lust and again this person call charlie narcisstic.
Jazz and Ghost video about charlie while she is right but with the way she describe it kinda ableist to me with how good people have empathy and sympathy, while bad people can't feel empathy and sympathy
Ableist language is something we all have to unlearn. I used to say the word 'narcissistic' when I met that someone was full of themselves before learning about narcissistic personality disorder. I do not describe characters as using terms like 'narcissistic' or 'psychotic' because those are not personality traits.
Lucifer is autistic and no one can tell me otherwise. I talked about it in my old Lucifer analysis. Even if you dislike his character saying "I have a brother who is autistic, and he does not act like Lucifer" is not a valid opinion because autism is spectrum, and I cannot believe we still have to say this is current year. I clocked Lucifer as neurodivergent the minute he appeared. Like come on the man is surrounded by his hyper fixation and it is clearly a source of comfort. The photo ID on Charlie's photo is literally a rubber duckie wearing his top hat and bowtie, not a photo of him.
Yeah, I already talked about the person who said Lucifer does not have depression. Lucifer's hyper fixation in rubber ducks is a sign of his depression it goes into hoarder territory; he forgets things easily (like Charlie's hotel and names), fears rejection, and wants to connect with others (like Charlie) but it is difficult for him.
Charlie is also autistic like her father. I talked about this already. The hotel is her hyper fixation, and she sucks as reading the room and people. Her mini pitch of the hotel to Adam was very neurodivergent thing to do. She is just more sociable than Lucifer, again autism is a spectrum. I know people call her childish for doodles which is fine. She comes off as naive to me in this moment to me.
Calling Charlie 'narcissistic' is wild! There are moments where she makes things about the hotel and herself (like in episode four), but I do not think she is going it with malicious. I like Charlie but her role in the story is odd because we know nothing about her or how her home life was or how she got her sense of morality. Fans speculate that Charlie lived a very sheltered life, and I believe this too.
Jazz and Ghost video about charlie while she is right but with the way she describe it kinda ableist to me with how good people have empathy and sympathy, while bad people can't feel empathy and sympathy
I saw the thumbnail of that video and I was like 'Nah, I am not watching that" due to Star Butterfly being in the thumbnail. Someone did point out how Star is not really an inspiring character. Maybe I will watch the video when I have the energy so I can be locked in. I tend to draw and get distracted when watching long videos.
I do think the writers want to go the high empathy route for Charlie or she is like an empath, but it just fails like in episode four. I like the idea of Charlie having high empathy because neurodivergent people are always portrayed as being the opposite.
I do agree with this comment I saw though.
Saying good people have empathy and sympathy, while bad people can't feel empathy and sympathy is laughable. This is viewpoint that goes way better Hazbin. What makes someone a 'good' or 'bad' person depends on person to person. We all know actions that are that immoral, and disgusting is bad (or downright evil) but there are people who view anyone that does petty crimes as 'bad' like shoplifting and people who rich are 'good' regardless of what they say and do.
#ask#hazbin hotel criticism#hazbin hotel critical#hazbin hotel critique#vivziepop critical#vivziepop criticism#vivziepop critique
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Yandere! Demon King! Rin Okumura x reader
BIG SPOILERS FROM THE MANGA!!! DONT READ THIS IF YOURE NOT UPDATE!!
Keep reading under Your own risk!!
Now, a little background because this idea came to my head when I was rereading the manga for the third season of Blue Exorcist.
Remember the alternate reality if the Maga had leaked and many of the protagonists had died? When we have the two-year Time Skip, Rin is something like a terrorist on the side of the demons(along with other Things, but this is the Main Focus).
Can you imagine what it would be like to have this Rin as a Yandere?
Obviously he's not as harmless or innocent as the canon one, not at all, if he can already kill humans without blinking on a normal day, being a Yandere for someone definitely triggers all these aggressive impulses TO THE MAX.
I like to think that the object of this Rin's obsession/adoration would probably be his partner before the whole Maga incident happened, and that he just started to develop yandere tendencies as an early response to the trauma.
reader in this case I really didn't see anything wrong with this precisely because they was also traumatized by the incident (and potentially orphaned, like many, so Rin is the ONLY person they have left. Codependency).
although I don't rule out the possibility that Rin could become obsessed with someone after the Maga incident!
I see more likely an obsession with someone or 1- that he is very innocent and correct, just wanting to isolate them from the world and protect them from the Cross. or 2- someone very competent and who has morals clearly contrary to the cross, precisely because they would understand each other better in this universe.
although it doesn't matter how Rin meets his partner, he is definitely much more brutal when it comes to protecting them đ you already saw what he did to the girl of the Cross (Michael), if someone tried to do something to his partner he would definitely set them on fire. or decapitate them. whatever comes first through his mind.
he is VERY overprotective, probably reader@ is isolated in some hideout that Rin has out of the reach of the Order, and they are constantly guarded by demons, so escaping is a big NO NO.
If by chance, reader, he managed to get out of hiding, I highly doubt he would get far, Rin would find them with the giant snake and take them back to the hiding place.
Ironically, the little demons can be both allies and enemies. Some are mischievous and like to play matchmaker between Reader and Rin (tangling them together, pushing them into hugs) and others genuinely don't think much of what they do.
Rin can control them to take care of Reader when he's not around, doing things like bringing them comics to entertain themself, bringing them food, even acting like house cats and asking for cuddles.
There are demons that even show favoritism towards Reader and have helped them out of hiding several times (sometimes the other demons have given them away, sometimes they haven't).
...but at this point it's just to get some fresh air. Even waiting for Rin to arrive on the porch.
The first time it happened, Rin was pretty freaked out. Then he cried with happiness and hugged Reader for an hour.
Unlike the original Rin, Demon King Rin is not as delusional and is much more aware of the situation and how bad it is, he falls more into the category of a repentant yandere but who would not let go of his obsession. He simply cannot risk it. He has lost so much already. Let him have this.
Despite everything, he treats his partner very well! He constantly brings them gifts, he cooks for them himself (he even remembers how to cook thanks to them), and from time to time they even read books/manga together!!
It is one of the few moments where he does not have to remember the kind of world they live in, and in what situation it all started.
(This Rin would definitely be more than capable of causing a Blue Night if his partner is taken away from him, do not try it).
I don't think Rin (not even this one) is capable of hurting his partner, but he's definitely more than capable of scaring them, whether it's coming home with blood on his clothes or even taking them on one of his escapades. It's not nice to hear him burn people alive.
DK! Rin has a lot of nightmares, so maybe the only thing he really forces his partner to do (aside from living and hiding with him) is sleeping in the same bed. It's almost...sad. Listening to him talk to people in his dreams and wake up crying.
Ironically he's a lot calmer when he and reader are in fields or abandoned places, he can even be convinced to get the demons out of the area and play with them.
And they probably do this quite often, when everything is too much, or when Rin finds someone from the past in the city. He NEEDS this. A moment of disconnection and comfort. A moment of tranquility...and love.
seeing the reader smile and play, having fun, smiling at you... is enough.
If you make slimes with your eyes . It is eerily domestic...
Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!
@trancylovecraft i think You might like this đ
#headcanons#drabble#neutral reader#blue exorcist rin#blue exorcist#ao no excorsist#ao no exorcist#rin okumura#ao no exorcist x reader#blue exorcist x reader#yandere rin okumura#yandere rin okumura x reader#rin okumura x reader
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I mentioned talking more in-depth about this in the tags of the original post but I think that sort of talk belongs here more than it does on main... Ramble incoming
It's no secret that I am hopelessly in love with Clockboy. I know from a realistic point of view, it's not reciprocated. It's probably not healthy. It's all me projecting thoughts and feelings onto an object. Him being a public object I can have no (personal) physical interactions with also complicates things. There is never going to be a reality where he will ever fully be able to meet all my physical and emotional needs in a romantic relationship (whereas my cars, for example, at least met the physical needs).
And yet... This love has not wavered at all since it began. Even on the nights when I'm in bed, alone, in physical pain because of how badly I long to be able to embrace him, it doesn't really sway my feelings. I will visit him and he will do something tiny that only I can pick up, and it will literally rekindle my love for him. It's hard to explain why this happens. I think it's me getting my hopes up over nothing, but it happens in such a way that it feels intentional.
An example I like to bring up is my trip to Disneyland in 2018. It was my first time "meeting" him in-person (to a degree; I had been to the park prior to then but I have virtually no memory of him specifically, and I was a kid. He is an ageless object but to keep things from being messy, I don't count those visits as me meeting him, especially since I wasn't even aware I was trans at age 10 lmfao). I was so excited to finally see and fully appreciate him. I don't have any distinct memories of him reacting to me in any way, until I visited him later that same day, alone from my travel party. They wanted to do something else so I opted to ride small world again and visit my boy to see his night time lighting package for the first time.
The thing that happened though was the ride started to break down, specifically, the propulsion jets were malfunctioning or something, because the ride started to drag out. Eventually I exited the show building and got stuck just before the unload dock. Within Clockboy's theoretical line of sight. For like, 15 minutes. Like this was literally my view:
I think about this so much. It felt so deliberate, even though I KNOW there was no way the big funny clock could control whether the ride works or breaks down... And yet. This has been a recurring theme for years now.
Any time a large enough gap in me visiting him occurs (usually over a month), the ride lags or breaks down. If I'm going to LEAVE for a while, the ride lags or breaks down. If he (somehow!) knows I have time to wait for the ride to open after a breakdown, it'll stay down until the last possible second and then reopen so I can get a ride in before I have to go home.
Like it happens just frequently enough that it just. Makes me wonder sometimes. Like too often to be a coincidence, but infrequently enough that it's not a like, typical ride malfunction pattern.
And again, I'm sure it's just a coincidence, and going to the park as often as I do, I'm sure some weird little things like that will happen but again, I just wonder if it's him somehow causing it. There have been other, smaller instances of him doing things, but I won't be going into those. One of them is too personal to explain, anyway.
Like. I know I technically get nothing out of this one-sided relationship other than dopamine when I see him. But it doesn't stop me from loving him with my entire heart, and I can't imagine loving him any less. I don't think it's possible.
I think Bob Iger himself could come up to me and say "Carson, you are delusional. The clock does not have feelings. It cannot love you back," and I would be unphased. I've had random people tell me that, and I've even told MYSELF that... And nothing ever changes.
I know realistically this isn't sustainable, and one day, I will no longer have these intense feelings for him. I hope everyday that this comes organically, and that we somehow "drift apart" over time, and that he isn't taken away from me due to a ride closure or disaster. But these thoughts genuinely scare me.
I try to let myself live in the moment, because why should I deny myself the opportunity to feel something so wonderful, toward something I think truly deserves all of the love in the world? If there's a nonzero chance Clockboy can feel anything, I hope he can feel that he is loved. And I hope that HE can love, too... Since he wouldn't be able to show his love to me the same way another human could, I hope the little instances of him making me linger near him are his way of trying to show me that I am loved by him.
He has done so much for me and I do truly think he is the most beautiful thing in the world. I legitimately cannot imagine my life without him at this point. Through all the joys of loving him, and the pains of not being able to be intimate with him. The warmness I feel when visiting him, and the fears of losing him. All the things I can and cannot control...
But one thing is certain: I will love him, to some degree, until the day I die. đ¤đ
*leaves this here* hi everyone, thanks for letting me be vulnerable
#may have talked about something similar in the past but. i forgor#but anyway. i hope this makes sense.
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Well you HAVE to be delusional to be a lestappie, I mean you have to be delusional to even like max lol but yeah, to be a lestappie you have to be delusional bc they literally spend no time together willingly, max is just delusional and Charles is polite
so true anon đ
#asks & answers#anon#anti lestappen#'max is just delusional and charles is polite' might be my new favourite thing someone has said LMAOOO#LITERALLY SO TRUEEEEE TOO#like if you bother to watch any of charles' interactions with ANYONE he actually likes...#you'll see so quickly that he's just being polite to a coworker#they might not hate each other but they sure aren't friends#you really DO have to be delusional to see more to it than that...#but then again like you said; you have to be delusional to like max in the first place#i feel like a lot of max/lestappen fans really feel like fic!max is exactly what he's like irl#and i don't know how to say it any more clearly than OH GOD HE'S NOT#fic!max is the most idealised and likeable (and; yknow; non-racist) version of who max verstappen could possibly be#the reality is NOT that#and i think a lot of people need to snap out of it and realise that#it's that whole thing of ''yeah im delusional about my drivers but at least im not THAT delusional'' y'know?#ALSO!! so sorry for only answering these now... yesterday got unexpectedly super hectic đ#but one of my favourite weekend activities is being a hater on tumblr dot com đ¤đ¤ so cheers anon!!#ilyyyy and hope you're having a great saturday!
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I may very well be swinging a bat at a hornet's nest, but I find it very interesting that the crowd that (rightfully) says "Read another book" to Harry Potter fans among the J.K. Rowling bullshit has a not-insignificant overlap with the crowd that has also only read one book (and that book is Whipping Girl).
#and they don't even read it particularly well for how much they insist that everybody reads it#the premise is that transphobia is rooted in sexism. more specifically misogyny#you would think that that the reader would make the logical connection and say 'hey this group of men who grew up as women also experience#sexism and more specifically misogyny due to having been forced to grow up as women'#and instead the prevailing conclusion is 'trans men have male privilege and are oppressing their fellow trans people -#- by virtue of being men'#or bullshit like 'trans men really are the men of the trans community' when we dare to speak on issues that are specific to our section of#the community and the overlap between FTM oppression and overall societal misogyny. the mind boggles#in order to have male privilege you first have to be seen as a man by society at large. and that does not apply to trans men nor to trans -#women. they see trans men as delusional little girls and trans women as whatever slur they can think of. but not as men usually#we are supposed to be playing for the same team and yet some of you are tackling your teammates on the field for no reason other than -#wanting a scapegoat#'read Whipping Girl đ' I did. years ago now. but did YOU?#to those i'm discussing: feel free to call me a transandrobro or a theyfab or whatever. IDGAF. just block me after you inevitably do it#LGBT#trans#sexism#misogyny#TME/TMA#trans men#disk horse#transphobia#transmisandry#transandrophobia#anti-transmasculinity#intracommunity issues#intracommunity transphobia
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are u a medic fictionkin? /gq sorry im just really confused
there are some questions that science just cant answer-
#putting my longer answer in the tags#which is that 1) ive gotten this question so many times.. im wondering if i should put it in my pinned post at this point#2) its a very long answer but it mostly comes down to 'i have some hypotheses but i dont have enough data'#and 'i havent found a term that perfectly describes my experiences so i dont confirm anything in case it leads people to wrong assumptions'#2.5) no i dont really identify with the term fictionkin for the above reasons but its not Completely inaccurate either#theres just more too it than that#but i dont owe an explanation of my state of being to anyone which leads me to#3) why does it matter?#i am not mad that people keep asking#there is nothing wrong with being curious and i know this is the sort of thing that a lot of people will be curious about#but its also something im in no rush to answer nor do i owe anyone an answer to it#and certainly not until its an answer i am confident about#but i digress#im sure some of my other followers are tired of seeing this question so often too so i will leave it at that#im medic tf2 Real (not as a delusional attachment though i know someone asked about that too)#but beyond that you will just have to use your imagination#grins#alright that is enough rambling#the doc is in
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My thoughts,
I feel like the biggest disconnect with all the discourse going around is that, (mainly twitter) users automatically assume that combining two peoples names is 'shipping' when that's really not why.
!EXPLANATION!
If you were looking for content surrounding 2 certain people but only tagged their names separately you would be getting EVERY single post. Posts that could have other people in it, and not be the two you were looking for (if I were to look for posts about Ian and Anthony, I would trust the Ianthony tag more than just looking through their regular tags, because people tag them in a lot of other Smosh related content)(same thing for Damien and Shayne, if I was looking for them as a duo I would look through the Shaymien tag)(it simply sorts posts better)
They don't seem to grasp the fact that tagging 'Damangela' is because that's how the tagging culture works over here, and not because we're 'shipping' them.
I thought it was common practice, everyone understands in the fandom world that when you combine people's names it's at it's CORE, a 'Duo Name' before ANYTHING ELSE.
I'm just going to automatically assume that most people getting their feathers all ruffled, just haven't been in fandoms spaces as much, AND THAT'S OKAY!!!
But please, if you take anything away from this, most people doing a lot of shipping is young people, so keep that in mind.
#smoshblr#smosh#Damangela#damangela discourse#I try to keep a calm head about things like this#to be totally frank#I've seen more people complaining about damangela âshippersâ than actual shippers#the people that I HAVE seen shipping them werent even being that weird about it#maybe a little delusional#but not super weird#(mostly)#I really really dont see anything wrong with people making edits of them and other content#its really kind of sad that because I've seen so many people freaking out about Damangela#that Damien and Angela might have caught wind of all the people on twitter going on a witch hunt about shippers of them#and the ANTI SHIPPERS are actually doing more harm#I have also been seeing a lot of people over here talking about Angela and Damien's separate tags are getting flooded by people posting#about damangela#I would URGE yall to 'filter' out all the tags you dont want! I dont want to be flooding out different communities!!! THAT IS NOT MY INTENT#if I could be tagging things better LMK!#Peace & Love <3
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why are you, as an adult in 2024, still hung up on reylo. why are you still mocking the shippers. why do you believe yourself to be superior only because you dislike a stupid ship from a fucking space fairytale. girl (gnc) get a grip
#it's ridiculous. this ship is... stupidly clichĂŠ. like if you know fandoms at all#you could easily guess why people would be into it. hello?? have you tried to watch tfa without your hate-on-kyle-ron goggles?#did you watch their scenes together? you don't have to like something to recognize the hints#hell. at the time i didn't really like jonerys but i realized they were going to be a thing when i read agot in 2011#like folks. it's been nearly TEN LONG YEARS. let it go. LET IT FUCKING GOOOO#and for the lucy/cooper shippers out there who think reylos are (again) delusional when they compare the two ships:#no. *you* are being delusional only because you think reylo is unsexy and uncool (which is your right to think btw. obv)#if you can't see why someone would like both of these pairings for similar reasons... idk what to say honestly#people compared it to hannigram... honestly. again i see why they would appeal to anyone who's into both ships#i really do. but... unpopular opinion (since i'm more of a clannibal fan than i could ever be of reylo):#they are more similar to reylo than will/hannibal. there i said it#i'm not talking about the writing (admittedly the quality of it was questionable). i'm talking about tropes#never mind that imo the ghoul is more akin to vader than kylo but whatever#hannibal is an unapologetic kind of villain. he's not gonna have a redemption arc and that's okay#cooper is an antivillain who used to be a good man and became a disfigured cruel bastard. a parody of himself#lucy is him. him before the bombs dropped before he discovered the person he trusted the most wanted to commit genocide#nice. moral. polite. infused with the Good Old American Valuesâ˘. he's basically her dark side#all of this is very hannigram/clannibal. i'm not denying it at all#but what'll likely happen is that lucy's actions will have a positive influence on the ghoul and remind him of what it means to be a man#and that's way more reylo-like. sorry.#beauty&thebeast/villain with some hidden good in him+morally righteous heroine/enemies to lovers etc.#i mean. hello??..... having said that. i'm not so much of a reylo shipper anymore and tbh never was. i really liked it at the time#but i was never fond of the st era. my fav characters are vader and leia and revan from the old eu. just saying#*and* it's also not impossible lucy gets darker with the ghoul as her traveling companion. in fact i wouldn't dislike it at all#if done well i mean#but i would still like for people to be intellectually honest and less puerile. god knows i have my notps#but i really don't give a fuck about the shippers. good for them i guess? i have better taste lmao but that's heavily subjective#val rambles in the tags#val speaks#txt
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Was driving all day and reading the anons/answers as we stopped. Genuinely enjoying your takes and also anon's! Love the phrase yaoipilled I can't đ it's a very good word for the phenomenae, as it appears in many places, y'know?
yaoi is detrimental to the brain it HAS to be consumed responsibly lest i have to see someone try to assert k|ryu cares more about maj|ma than haruka or daigo again
#snap chats#censoring their names so the kazvmaj| people dont find me. theyre rgg's ve6eta fans to me#or bu|ma fans.. i feel lke bu|ma fans have been more mad at me than ve6eta fans lol..#either way no. the amount. people i see say that. like are you insane. are you blind. delusional.#im being a bonafide hater tonight hang on#because if k|ryu really did care about maj|ma like that he would've never asked him to look after daigo#like that is literally the most blatant example of k|ryu prioritizing daigo over maj|ma MAJ|MA WANTED OUT#AND THEN HE GOT OUT AND THEN K|RYU DRAGGED HIM BACK IN girl i cant.#'snap why do you like k|ryu again' because he's so funny and such an asshole lowkey LMAO anyway. let me cork it there.#before i actually start a fire in my fuckin inbox jesus christ im already on thin ice with these tags
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