#you learn by talking and engaging

[lover-of-mine]

I don't think people seem to understand that they could've given up. We know fox was blocking bisexual Buck and that probably means they were blocking buddie, so they could've given up. Buddie is a love story. Their devotion to each other is canon. There isn't anything the show can do that's gonna convince me they don't love each other. But they could've given up at any point. Backed off, actually give any other love interest a fighting chance, double down on them being best friends and not make it bigger. They choose not to. They kept adding to this love story as best as they could. They are best friends. They are partners. They are family. They would die for each other but they also have fun together. They have one braincell they keep pingponging between them. They love each other. That's a fact. That will always be a fact. They are each other's person. And now we are at a place where that can be explicitly explored. It's a slowburn. It's a network slowburn. The desire to rip your hair out comes with it but it makes the moment they finally get their shit together that much sweeter. We're getting there. Somehow y'all had more hope when all we had to go on was a couch. Buck is actually queer now. This time last year Buck and Eddie were getting a comphet ending. Now one of them is actually queer. We're gonna get there, but they are not just gonna trip into a relationship because they are too careful with buddie as a friendship to not address the issues and make things natural before getting them together because everyone involved in this madness knows what they have in their hands. They know once they get buddie together it's forever, they're not gonna rush into it now they have actual room to play.

[aro-culture-is]

aro culture is getting really annoyed with the relationships unit in your sociology class because the whole thing is just 100% amatonormativity.

:\

if think your teacher, professor, and/or TAs might be interested in discussing the concept, I have some idea of bringing up the topic?

I'd personally say something like, "Hi, During our section in sociology around relationships, I couldn't help but think it would be interesting to discuss how a sociological theory called "amatonormativity" might relate to these lessons. I gathered a few sources from the professor who coined it, a thesis written on it, and a law review written about the connection between it and laws in the USA. There's some connections between its use in feminist thought and in queer theories, and I'd love to know your thoughts about it. I personally was thinking of when [specific statement] was said, and how I would apply this theory. I hope it's as interesting to you as it is to me."

Coiner's current webpage: https://elizabethbrake.com/amatonormativity/

Thesis: https://vc.bridgew.edu/honors_proj/330/ (click download in upper right hand corner for the PDF, depending on the individual it may be worth downloading and sending that rather than a link)

Law Review: https://uclawreview.org/2022/06/09/amatonormativity-in-the-law-an-introduction/

[puppyeared]

i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you

[paranormaljones]

Okay media consumers, I'm gonna ask you to follow some lines of logic with me.

For good stories to exist, there needs to be conflict.

For conflict to happen, one or more characters will almost always need to make bad choices.

Just because a character makes one or a few bad choices does not automatically earn them the label of "toxic".

Just because said character does not experience immediate consequences due to their bad choices does not mean that they never will (especially if their story is not yet finished), nor does it mean that their creator is romanticizing or portraying their bad choices in a good light.

I mean, come on. You guys love a good slow burn romance. The least you can do is get used to the idea of slow burn conflict.

Edit:

DO NOT INTERPRET THIS POST AS ME SAYING THAT YOU SHOULDN'T DISAGREE WITH ANY CHARACTER'S ACTIONS EVER. DO NOT DO THAT.

I can tell some of you are already thinking about doing that.

Don't.

Please.

I don't have the energy for that.

[shiraishi--kanade]

I remember hearing a video essayist for a different fandom saying a lot of people are having wild takes on the media in question because it's becoming more common to get information about the books second-hand than to actually read the books. And I think something like this happened with pjsk. Except worse because we don't even have video essays we have tiktoks. And that's why We're Like This

[edwinisms]

pro tip if you want a positive fandom experience: do not follow confession blogs. you’re just asking for a bad time if you do that just don’t

[nams2]

Talking to other partnering aros: Yeah so I've been reading original fics on AO3 to try and find some good queerplatonic stuff. Theres a steady stream if you filter by the queerplatonic tag which is nice. The problem is that most of it's either too short for me or just underdeveloped background characters but its something. Yeah it sucks to settle for that but you know how dire it is finding rep.

Talking about being aro to allos: No Im aroace. That means aromantic and asexual. They're different things. It- no asexual means a lack of sexual attraction. They can be different.

[batsplat]

OT3: casey stoner/his neuroses/the concept of valentino rossi that mostly exists in casey’s head

y'know I have this casey stoner... idk what it is. thematic mind map (literal), let's say, that I like fiddling with and adding things to when the mood hits me. and it does always strike me just how many of his struggles during his careers and issues with the sport can in some way be linked back to the valentino rivalry

casey's sense of isolation? super valentino related. casey's feelings of cultural alienation in a paddock dominated by europeans? even when it's not really related to valentino, casey is the one linking those two things together. casey's issues with other riders not being respectful enough on track? very obviously repeatedly about valentino. casey's discomfort with the performance and entertainment-related aspects of the sport? more valentino. casey feeling treated unfairly by the manufacturers, the media, the marshals, the fans.... keeps coming back to valentino. casey's mystery illness really shouldn't be as relevant to the rivalry as it is, but somehow through this combination of public discourse and whatever comparisons casey's brain is cooking up at any moment in time... there valentino is again

one of the most charming things about valentino's feuds is that in each and every single one, both participants end up being deeply weird about each other? just keep knocking off these banger quotes about the other where you read them and go. hm. what's going on there then. I don't want to make it sound like I think casey is the worst offender with this (not when marc and valentino have their whole thing going on, bidirectionally)... but I do think he's the most susceptible to conflating his valentino issues with like... everything else that was going on in his career. to the extent where his alienation with the sport as a whole, his extreme disillusionment from everything related to motogp, really cannot be meaningfully disentangled from the valentino rivalry. at times it feels like, to casey, valentino literally is the sport. and that's the thing casey dedicated his whole life to!! which means you do inevitably end up regularly going 'wow there's a lot to unpack'. add in a dash of neuroticism...

and yeah you're so right anon!! the neuroses are what end up creating the version of valentino that mostly exists in casey's head, a version that casey is just a touch obsessed with. I always think it's interesting how aware casey is that he doesn't know valentino as a person - and to the extent casey does know him, he gets on pretty well with him... but valentino the person isn't all that relevant to him. it's valentino the character who matters - and can you even really know a character? in the end, all casey can do is rely on his own understanding of that character, as imperfect as it is. and, well, in a way casey is trapped with that character forevermore. if one man comes to embody a sport to such an extent and if that sport has been your life's work, how can you not be a little bit trapped? as he tries to make his peace with the sport and his experiences within it, so too has casey settled on a narrative of valentino that helps him make sense of it all... a very specific understanding of his rival that casey has shaped in his mind and still trots out now when he sells his own version of events to the media. casey learned from valentino, casey learned to be a little more like valentino, casey learned to fight valentino with his own tools, casey tells himself a story of that fight. he still continues to do so - and in the end he will never be entirely free of valentino

[arson-09]

How people are trying to change fandom (the rise of hatred against non-canon media)

This was inspired by the rise of backlash against the "Rhysta" ship.

Traditionally throughout the history of fandom spaces on social media, a very important factor has been creativity of course. Art and Fics by fans being the backbone of a fandom. Including non-canon ships, Aus, etc. And of course there was drama (when is there not drama?) BUT there wasn't as much hate because there was an understanding that it's not REAL. People in fandoms understood creativity and thinking outside the box (canon)

But something interesting happened in 2020 with the pandemic, people who weren't apart of fandom spaces started joining cause what else were you going to do? but there started the divide. These people wouldn't have joined fandoms originally because they didn't have that sort of creativity. Which isn't a bad or negative thing, everyone is different and that what makes the world go around, but these people were not used to fandom spaces and that divergency. To them, things have to be how it was written and non-canon things, ships or au's that can't hurt you or become canon, were blasphemous. Because why change the foundation if you liked the original media? this also ties into the "why do you read or interact with this media?" questions when people engage with media in their own way even if they dislike the majority of it. which is valid to do, I do it personally with acotar. I dislike the majority of acotar from the way it's written to lots of the characters, but I interact with a certain subset of the fandom that shares a love for the same characters as I.

But these people, these mostly neurotypical, TikTok people, intrude into these safe creative spaces and cause a ruckus over non-canon Aus and ships. for no reason! Ships like Rhysta are harmless, of course people who make and consume this media don't think it's going to be real, and that's the misconception! Making and consuming non-canon media doesn't mean you think it's going to happen or want it to happen, it's just existing. existing for the sake of existing and stretching creative muscles. You can't grow as an artist if you do not break from the mold, from the restraints of canon.

What you are doing by constantly harassing and posting shit about non-canon media is showing you lack a fundamental understanding of Fandom. Policing what people do is a fruitless endeavor. of course, calling out actually problematic creators is okay, when what they're doing is actually harmful and not them being creative or God forbid, a little weird.

There has been and still needs to be respect in the places. Filtering tags for things that upset you and blocking creators you disagree with is key to being someone people will actually listen to and respect. If you refuse to do that, no one you harass, or attack will take you seriously. and maybe that's not your objective but that means you're going to be blocked on main and made fun of. And this segment is somewhat targeted at someone who has been consistently harassing my mutuals, but I've seen so many people like this and it's a real issue. And its such an issue in Booktok popular books and shows, and media that becomes popular with the masses.

Fandom spaces aren't meant to follow canon to a T. People will have non-canon ships, opinions on how they think the series should have gone, opinions on characters, etc. Constantly harassing and targeting creators won't change that.

I know this won't stop this behavior, it will continue to happen but it's been bothering me and maybe this will change some people's minds on how they interact with the media they like, and they hate.

I love rhysta, I think that the dynamic is very interesting and that people are free to explore that and say whatever they want about how it could have gone in canon. None of that means i think its going to happen or that it should. Lord, people are just having fun. Like they should in fandom places.

[whywoulditho]

not saying the holocaust wasn't bad. but i need people to understand that it wasn't the only genocide that happened in the same period of world history. not because i want you to pay less attention to holocaust but because i need you to ask why it's the only one we ever talk about. it wasn't the longest occured massacre of a marginalized group, it wasn't the most gruesome, it wasn't the one with the most casualties, it wasn't the first and it wasn't the last one. i need people to think about why we didn't pay much attention to all the other holocausts after WWII that happened simultaniously and were just as horrible. it says so much about media, the news we are fed, and that our empathy is BOUGHT by the same people that keep funding genocides all over the world.

[allygatoor]

i think it's time that we as a society realized that actually eternals wasn't bad it was just not standard marvel fare and that's okay

[pekoeboo]

ugh. some thoughts.

really been trying to find the joy in drawing/writing again and honestly it's been such a challenge. friends have told me it's most likely depression that's making it hard to feel motivated and tbh they're probably right.

hoping to get back into being creative in the way I Want to be at some point tho. I miss it. there's still so much with my stories and characters that I haven't been able to share or explain and I wish I knew how without it feeling like this daunting, impossible task.

I don't know when I'll get around to actually sharing art again (or writing, if ever). was hoping that I'd manage to get some of my mental and physical issues in check recently for just long enough to get back into the swing of being creative, but that hasn't seemed to work. everything feels bad, both artistically and physically. I'm struggling to keep up with the frantic pace at which my brain comes up with story concepts and intriguing character interactions, even tho everything in me wishes I could turn it into tangible artistic expression so I can get it out of my head and share it. it used to be easy. I don't know why it's not now.

I'm just . tired, I guess.

[tariah23]

I rly don’t see how ppl be 20+ shipping kids anymore tbh… like, it’s so rampant and I don’t see the appeal to it anymore being as tho I’m in my late 20’s.

[is-this-even-relatable]

I’ve seen this a few times and I wanna address it. In the phandom, as a fan of Danny Phantom, you can be a fan however you want.

You’re not wrong for liking what you like. If you don’t care for AU’s and fanon and all the rewriting and fix-its and shipping… then good on you. If you watched the show as a kid and are a fan because you like canon and the show itself makes you happy, then good on you. If you discovered the show recently or as an adult and are diving into a new passion, then good. on. you.

We all love the show, or at least the concepts and vision behind it, that’s why we are fans. (especially the theme song, THAT I think we can all agree is a hecking banger.)

ASIDE 1: What this post is addressing is the concerns from some people who only like canon, or prefer majority of canon over fanon, about feeling left out of the phandom. I’ve also heard some people, who grew up with the show, who’ve said that Butch Hartman is their childhood hero, and feeling awkward and off to the side in the phandom, while people bash on him and the show.

While yes there are problems, and I truly recommend everyone who reads this looking up “Why don’t people like Butch Hartman?” or “What did Butch Hartman do?” and doing a bit of research on your own, this doesn’t mean you can’t still have that childhood respect.

It’s a bittersweet sort of thing, where someone doesn’t turn out to be as great as you’d envisioned they were. Where you have respect for them from the past, and are learning that they’re not who you thought they’d be, and you feel betrayed because maybe your trust was misplaced. But that’s not on you, and you shouldn’t be shamed for wanting to preserve that memory and keep the innocence of your childhood heroes alive.

I myself, have had a huge part of my childhood and formulaic memories, had to be reevaluated once I got older and realized that hey… that was definitely problematic. I was a kid, and didn’t know any better, but the organizers definitely did. I’m glad to have done it because those experiences really mattered to me, but I feel guilty for thinking that because I also now have the knowledge that it wasn’t right. Cultural appropriation is a huge disrespect to the things I thought I was respecting when I was young. So although I appreciate the memories and the time I spent and who it made me today, I can say for a fact I do not condone the ones who orchestrated it, because I have become an informed individual. Because I know better. So I will continue to love the ideals introduced to me, but I will go about it the correct way.

In that thread, I do think that it’s good for everyone to educate themselves on the media you consume, especially on subtle contexts and perhaps why some things get spread around like “butch hartman sucks” rather than just accepting or rejecting hearsay without confirming it for yourself. If you don’t know something, seek to understand it!

But, and I stand by this, any existing or future issues with the show’s aging or it’s creator does not give anyone the right to make any other person feel unwelcome. And if anyone, phandom or otherwise, yells and kicks and screams and or otherwise has a hissy fit at you for liking canon or anything like that… then fuck em.

Nobody can stop you from loving what you love! We are all on earth together, and you truly only live once. So don’t waste the amazing time you have doubting yourself. Don’t spend time reading and consuming content that you don’t want to. If you wanna read canon fics only, never reading crossovers, then you. go. damn. do it.

If you’ve never created anything in your life, never drawn a doodle or written a blurb, you are still a part of the phandom, and we are happy to have you. Leave comments, likes, and reblogs to show your presence and appreciation! Tell the content creators you like the most that you appreciate what they’ve done!

In the end, we are all just people, who one day found ourselves reading/watching/looking at a silly ghost boy who was just 14, and found that we couldn’t look away.

[waywardsalt]

bc its been bouncing around in my head i think another little tiny grievance i had with totk is that i got to the end and just felt a sense of ‘well what the hell was that all for then’

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

You know, I'm glad that some of us take the step to embrace things that we like even if they're "cringe" or "objectively bad"

But perhaps we could take the next step forward and embrace the idea of reading into books/shows/movies/etc even if they don't seem deep. Perhaps we could understand that the two kinds of media aren't either "shallow and meaningless so you're weird and brainrotted to read into it" or "incredibly and profoundly deep in every way so if you don't analyze every single angle of the thing then you're brainrotted". Some media is deeper than others, but all I propose is that no matter how deep it seems it's acceptable to dig into the thing and take the media seriously instead of just assuming that because of ____ thing (such as target audience or how cringe it is) the media not deep and will never be deep and everything good about it happened on accident.