#you know my father and yours get real
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Smoking toddlers. The world is fucking insane.
#I might have tried it when dad was drunk and not paying attention :0#it is frustrating when both the father and his two sons are all capable of that evil shit....#but I have to at least say thanks to someone for it#even if I am still like it's your ine redeeming quality but you're sephiroth or kepirot or whatecer#storm blows through I am like you better get those roots back down Mr Oak#and it listened to me#slowly those roots are pulling back down#is it a matter of jist riding out this Pixel 4a#all of this makes it easy to think it's real#look I don't know what to tell you about changing my view on simulations#I kinda loaded us into one of those matrix things though I guess#well you got loaded and went into it anyway#like jane....did you want me to have a gf that didn't get down are you serious#you know my father and yours get real#doesn't mean I can't be better than them at it I am I am the best#mercy right I will believe it when I taste it#the selective flags on fake news#and yes baby they look real as fuck#perfect#I could get used to sucking on them on the regular real fast#but I am also like we gotta be close#🤔 she does look like edward kinda#smh crazy#it's not bad it's just so fucking outrageous#also me: why the fuck am I such a cynic#cyan is like the sad man#I am like oh my little one your mother is frustrating me#coop will think it's a cool name fho#and his opinion always has merit#he's just mad! no these fucking modern mods man I don't get it
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kids when they hear that their dad is back in town VS. kids when theyre hanging out with a conman that accidentally stole their wallet once
im not even joking btw
bonus heres me being crazy about them in dms ^^^
#mob psycho 100#mp100#shou suzuki#sho suzuki#reigen arataka#i know sho doesnt actually BELIEVE his dad is back but even just that split second reaction is a weird one to have over your dad coming bac#he was like 'say sike rn... wait that aint right.'#shou watching them on the bottom floor while being isolated up in the corner at the end of the third stage play. and saying#'it's nice that they're so easygoing.' all wistfully???? im killing somebody#reigen calling him a poor thing and worrying about him DESPITE knowing his mischievous ways. ugh#gonna quote my reaction to clip rq#'bro [shou] heard him [reigen] talking about guardianship over children and making sure theyre safe over anything else and was like-#'this is getting too real for me i gotta make fun of him immediately.''#idc WHAT yall think to ME that was such a thick layer of defense mechanism that even though reigen's guardianship speech wasnt directed#at Sho he still felt the intrinsic urge to shoot back because of what hes experienced with people who are SUPPOSED to be protecting him.#would yall believe me if i told you i am totally insane#there are SO MANY THINGS. woven into their interactions that really enhance it#its totally silly! yes! but also! it is a legitimate ARC of GROWTH within their relationship! we watch as Sho starts off#with no trust in the man at all (although for a pretty good reason)#and over time he realizes hes NOT total shitbag#of course this doesnt mean hes completely vulnerable with him. its easy to infer that his distrust in certain people is formed from#a lifetime of being let down and incapability of dependency on certain trusted adults. his defense must be so heavily built up#even after gaining some sort of trust from Shou Reigen will NOT be exempt from his impish defense mechanisms.#sho will not make himself emotionally available as he would then be open to being hurt by someone else he thought could trust#his 'carefree and prankish' behavior is the wall between himself and such an intense feeling of disappointment and hurt and loneliness#but i like to think hes also just silly. hehe#man that stage play huh. shoots every fatal drug directly into my bloodstream#shou's trust and father issues VS stupid conman who has the common sense to not let children be beat up by grown ass adults. who will win.#i mightve forgotten something but. i think this is pretty packed full already so i am pleased. thank you for reading <3#meowmeow art
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flying perilously close to spoilerposting here but one thing that's SO fun about garashir is how they have such complementary daddy issues and yet neither of them really fully grasp what the other one's problem is
#emily if you see this post DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT#julian 'if your dad sucks why not just go no-contact and refuse to talk about it ever' bashir#elim 'well MY father could visit any number of horrors upon me For The Greater Good and i'd be fine as long as he acknowledged me' garak#guy who would do anything to be useful to his father in any capacity#vs guy who would do anything to be useful in general but only if it's got nothing to do with his father.#like if they ever sat down and discussed their respective damage i think they would both misunderstand each other SO badly.#and of course i love to think about this in the context of them getting married#where garak is like. well obviously we'll be inviting your entire extended family for our big cardassian wedding.#since you're lucky enough to still HAVE a family#and julian is like no the hell we won't be. are you insane.#obviously by this point garak knows why julian isn't on speaking terms with his folks but he doesn't quite grasp it emotionally#and can't help but perceive it as some sort of slight since family is such a big deal to cardassians#and after he let julian stay when [REDACTED FOR SPOILERS] he can't understand why julian won't at least introduce him to his parents#meanwhile julian thinks he's doing garak a favour by keeping them separate :/#and can't understand why garak is SO determined to dismiss julian's discomfort and force his way into this part of julian's life#cue a lot of petty sniping to mask very real hurt feelings before they actually talk it out.
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also just for the record. no matter how much utterly stupid shit i say or draw about him, frank actually makes me so deeply sad. this old man should be picking up his grandkids but he cant. i think about him too much and im so sad
#marvel#frank castle#the punisher#this is true for like most of these guys [gestures vaguely to comicbook men] but frank is the one that makes me want to chew on rocks rn. s#like yeah i selfship with him for fun and i like to think about cutesy or funny stuff involving him but the reality is he makes me so sad#ig thats part of why i do it. you make me so sad old man. but youre not real so in some version of not real you can be a little better#not happy but yk better#but like. just. fuck man hes so deeply damaged and hurt it drives me up the wall. my hurt person hurting people#as always i struggle to string words together this isnt news if you know anything about him you know exactly what im getting at#he would have been a wonderful father and husband. the way hes so devoted to them still. always. its killing me#sometimes i see canon moments of him where how just fundamentally deeply broken as a person he is and augh#nothing can help you nothing can make things any better but my god you cannot be left alone in this state#eh maybe thats it. i cant help him i cant make him feel better. but i cant let him be alone like this#i dont think he should have to be alone like this#bleh sorry word vomit. im tired and sleepy. i wrote 4 essays this week. need to write 2 more. going a little bonkers#brain is fried.
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S5 E1 Supernatural
I SWEAR TO GOD! They need to take shots of holy water everytime they see each other! Bring back Cristo, this is ridiculous. But Meg's back! Bobby, sadly got possessed, but he resisted cus they were gonna make him hurt one of his boys 😭😭😭 John could never. This poor Nick dude is going through it, but he is funny. 'Ok Satan 🙄 tell me to quit drinking before bed' 'if it's all the same to you I'd like to wake up now' 'why the hell would I do something like that'. Dean is the vessel for Michael. All but two Angels are massive dicks. But guess who's back to save the boys? Castiel, being a bad ass and....carving things into the boys ribs.
AHHHHH BOBBY REASSURING SAM THAT IT WAS THE DEMON THAT TOLD HIM TO LOSE HIS NUMBER 😭😭😭 CUS BOBBY BELIEVES FAMILY IS FAMILY NO MATTER WHAT AND IT DON'T END IN BLOOD. But Dean doesn't think he can trust Sam anymore cus he took a demon's side over his brothers 😭😭😭
#also megs name isnt meg are we just calling her meg out of simplicity?#also how do they know what demon is what if they get a new vessel and dont introduce themselves. sm walks in a goes MEG#how do you know that Sam? do demons give off a vibe? like `ah yes its meg again i can tell cus of the aura she has`#dean winchester#sam winchester#supernatural s5#batcavescolony watches supernatural#batcavescolony watches#bobby singer#castiel#apparently Dean had a GED which makes sence for him.#Of course the fangirl ships wincest 🤮. if the author of my favorite book series called to tell me the series is real I feel like#I'd have a bit of decorum. Your fanfic history is between you can god#supernatural#i feel for sam he was manipulated by ruby but it must be a kick in the teeth for him to be acting like john especially when he used to be s#against john.#something something hes fathers son even though he tried so hard not to be#speaking of non dick angels.... where is anna?#spn
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begging twitter to stop showing me tweets of people with no reading comprehension misrepresenting things I said but since i was going to make this more in-depth post Anyway .
when i say imogen is better read as a metaphor for generational trauma than she is a metaphor for queerness or chronic pain, i’m not talking about legitimate traits she has as a character. obviously she is queer. obviously she experiences some form of chronic pain (though i would argue her magic better suits chronic illness not pain because she states that it’s Not always painful, but it does always influence how she lives her life).
when i talk about how well she’s understood as a metaphor, i’m talking about when i’m looking at her as a part of a story, as an arc that i am witnessing rather than in the more typical fandom way of this is a fictional person who interacts with exandria as real people do. and that is a fun way to interact with characters, i enjoy it a lot! but when i say imogen (to me, as i for some reason have to clarify on my own blog which implies that these are my own opinions and not absolute fact that needs to be accepted by people on the internet with different experience and opinions than me) is best read as a metaphor for generational trauma, it isn’t a dismissal of her queerness or her illness, it’s just me thinking looking at her from that angle is more compelling.
imogen has been one of my favourite characters and least favourite characters in campaign 3 because i tend to analyse her through a lens of generational trauma and she ends up looking extremely familiar to me as someone with a family that carries their’s heavily which is as comforting as it is frustrating.
for me the main thing that looking at imogen through a queer lens of literary analysis fails to account for is harm. on the one hand - the harm that imogen experiences, not because of how people treat her for who she is, but that exists simply as a factor of her being ruidusborn. on the other hand a the harm that imogen causes. not to say that she is some malicious villain waiting for her chance to harm others, but that there are things about being ruidusborn that very much do incline her towards violence in a way that she might not otherwise be - i think about the conversation after she went nuclear and chet brought up people being scared of her connecting that to her father keeping distance. the only harm that queerness provides comes from society, and that isn’t the case in exandria. even metaphorically, the thing that society fears in ruidusborn people (while it has certainly been exacerbated by centuries of superstition and practices like we saw in zephrah) is a tangible threat. imogen’s magic when not controlled can wipe out a city block, but queerness poses no threat.
that’s why i’m not compelled by imogen’s backstory as a queer metaphor. not because i’m some imodna anti (i very emphatically am not but this fandom kinda makes me wish i was sometimes) or because i think exandria’s lack of homophobia/transphobia means that characters can’t be viewed through a queer lens or that critical role doesn’t contain some of the most compelling queer metaphor i’ve encountered. imogen just isn’t one of those characters, not because she isn’t queer, or because i think her story shouldn’t resonate with queer people, just because i find the generational trauma angle more consistent.
it’s similar with the chronic illness angle, which i will refer to as illness but you’re welcome to emphasise pain, we all have different vocabularies for the experiences we face. but just to give context i’m running off laura’s comparison of imogen’s powers to her own sensory issues and anxiety which while often Lead to pain, fall more into chronic illness in imogen’s context to me. and i do think there’s substantial comparison for imogen’s story as a metaphor for chronic illness, but i think that was much more true earlier in the campaign than it is looking at her from the current context. her beginning motivation being her search for knowledge about her powers really resonated with me as similar to someone experiencing symptoms of chronic illness but who could neither figure out how to treat them or what they were caused by.
but then imogen got more information, specifically about her mother, and her priority became not understanding her powers but understanding her current state as a person - how had she become the person she is, inclusive of her powers but very much emphasising her lack of a mother who became more and more present in the unweaving web of ruidusborn lore. that’s when i was less compelled by the chronic illness reading and more compelled by viewing her as a metaphor for generational trauma. had that not been enough on its own, imogen’s visit to relvin and her recent thoughts on her mother would be enough to convince me.
the part that makes me hesitant about this post is that generational trauma is so intensely linked to the contexts under which it is created and perpetuated. so i can’t really point to specific scenes as evidence of specific things that prove generational trauma is the most compelling and i don’t really want to unload that much of my own experience to clarify my thoughts on a character. but vaguely, i will say that imogen’s relationship with her parents is obviously the clearest source for my reading her as a metaphor for generational trauma. the fact that relvin, the only person in her family without the thing that draws society’s ire, is also the person that she has the most willing anger at is also indicative of this to me. in general, imogen’s rage that so easily transitions into sadness and vice versa comes out a lot in conversations about parents. most recently, i think about ashton’s lovely speech about found family and his distrust about parents and how as they were speaking, laura seemed to be playing imogen as sadly in thought versus months ago when fearnes parents showed up with striking similarities to liliana and imogen’s words of wisdom were let’s hurt them all.
and like. to me that angersadnessvengeancegrief is particularly evocative of the feelings that arise when you are in a family with generational trauma, especially when you are aware of it. because imogen can and has followed the logical steps that have led her and her family to where they are. early on when recounting her relationship with her dad she seemed wistful but understanding of the distance between them. in nearly every encountered with a parental figure imogen seems to be some level of distrusting for the most part, but she’s still holding out hope that her mother will see the good side. and further, there’s the complication of how dire her losing her powers seems to be, and how inextricable her powers are from every aspect of her life. she’s also southern and from a blue collar family. this means nothing except it also means a whole lot.
this is messy and not well organised but if you want a good essay you’re gonna have to pay me money for it but tldr: i say things i believe on my This Is My Opinion Blog and i don’t think i need to explain my thoughts to strangers on the internet but this was already half written in my drafts and if people are gonna shit on my opinions please at least do it in good faith and shit on my actual opinions not the ones you’ve decided i have.
#it’s just the. your mother leaves and you know nothing you don’t even know that she Chose to leave you just know she’s gone#and your father is there in every way he can be which isn’t Enough#and then. you do the same thing your mom did and you find the answers she found but. you’re finding a way out of it . not Completely .#and not Perfectly. but enough that you’re angry that the world wasn’t kind enough to her to give her a way out#and you’re angry that she probably wouldn’t have taken a way out if she found it#and you’re just. getting hurt by her over and over and you’re putting your life and friends at risk over and over in the thin Hope#that this time when she hears you out she’ll actually Hear you#also . just in general. i do not worship the ground of the mn campaign for anyone to accuse me of thinking cr characters can’t be queercoded#i’m stronger than you . i see the queerness of fjorester which only people with real reading comprehension understand .#anyway this is all light hearted if i was actually like . Mad this would be like. one sentence long#imogen temult#cr3#critical role#the temults#cr meta#listen man. imogen is personal to me i hate her i love her i want to hit her i want to hug her i can’t look at her i wanna study her#my posts
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every time you draw joe you get his face so spot on!!!! i love when you draw him!!!
Thank you!! I adore him, I'm in love with him, I say this all the time but he is The Most Beautiful Man In The World. Let's all look at him together. Look at the plains of his face. The silhouette of him. His eyelashes, nose, lips, hair. He's godly why is he so beautiful.
#joe if you need another family i GOTCHU#not wrecking your family but simply promoting you to another one bc youre such a good husband and father so you get 2#im in love love love with this man if i could marry him i would in a heart beat and id live such a happy life#everyone go listen to joes podcast and jerk off about him thats an order itll do your heart good#watch an interview where he smiles and your troubles will be healed#boa hancock isnt real but joe trohman is#i need to be kissinf him#id let this man come inside me for several years#lockin it doen woth him#lord his nose aughhhh#okay hahahahahahhaha these are my feelings about joe in case you were wondering#thank you for the vedy very high praise bc if my drawings have captured a flraction of the feelings i have for him then we've come xloser to#depicting divinity itself#joe#yall bringing me joy#yall being kind about my art#not art#ask#anon#i cant believe there was a time i didnt know who joe was#yall introduced me to him isnt that funny
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using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.
#but jesus christ coming back home while already knee deep in a suicidal episode was an awful idea#like i was maybe on the verge of improving and then i came back to all of this family bullshit#and the place as well like it’s so. i don’t want to say isolated necessarily. but so much it’s own little bubble#and i spent the last eight or nine years i lived here depressed and the last six suicidal#and being back here feels like the actual place is telling me to die#and i don’t think it helps that every place i go i know or know of someone who successfully committed suicide#like. oh this person drowned themself here. or that person hung themself in these woods. or several people jumped off the side of this clif#like. it all feels like reminders of my failures. and it’s like. cmon. wouldn’t it be easy. all you need to do is jump. is slit your throat#is find a decent piece of rope. idk. but everything is so much and i just want it to stop and it feels like the ground itself#is giving me a way to do it.#i genuinely feel like i’m like 16 or 17 again. and everything that isn’t within these hills#feels like a haze and not actually real. like the concept of buxton doesn’t actually exist and my friends do not actually exist and nothing#actually exists except the place i’m in and my family and the pub#i think going back to work at the pub was a mistake; i think it’s making this worse. especially because it’s henry’s dad’s local#and where henry’s wake was. and nothing there has changed at all. it’s like the whole last year never happened.#and i only need to get through two more days but it feels like an impossible task and i keep thinking being back in york will fix me but id#if that even true like. i was suicidal before i left. and it’s going to be intense and stressful and then i have to leave again.#come back here and do three full weeks of this all over again. i haven’t even managed two yet this time around. and i feel like#such a failure and such a drain on my friends (and on one in particular) because it just#is so much and has been so long and everything is complicated and awful and i think if i hadn’t come back i’d be in a normal mental state#by now. that’s the worst fucking part. and also the whole thing of i know how to be suicidal here. i know how to not give a shit about#living here. i know how to do that. but ive never had to try before. like im trying to improve and im trying to hold on and hold off the#urges to kill myself or self harm or whatever because i said i would and because i KNOW it can be better than this and bc i love my friends#and they love me and i don’t want to upset them or make them anxious or anything like that and kat made me promise to try and im trying so#fucking hard and it feels like it’s not even worth the effort because it’s so much effort and everything is so overwhelming and awful and i#hate the way my family interacts and i just want everything to stop and idc if suicide is the cowards way out or selfish or whatever#bullshit people say it feels like the only option i can actually withstand because everything is so much pain and so much effort and so muc#everything and i can’t deal with it anymore. and also i forgot just how much i have to fucking mask in front of my parents and especially m#father and it’s so exhausting and i can’t sleep and there’s so much yelling and i just need it all to stop#i’ve had major breakdowns the last 3 nights about wanting to die so much & trying so hard to not let myself & idk how much longer i can tak
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anyway as soon as i pry myself off this couch im gonna share some screenshots of bg3 protags on my sideblog. just gotta like. reach the desk first.
#all i can think about is the shelves im gonna get installed here over the next little bit fdghj#yall dont understand its so hard to keep things clean and brain friendly when you just dont have anywhere to put stuff.#hellish#& then i get overwhelmed and turn into a massive bitch when i try to get it under control fdgh#instead its been like. 2 straight days of dopamine i fucking swear?? my body probably definitely wouldnt let me do this for a living#(my hip is screamingggg dfghgjj) but actually if i could & if i could work in a team then yeah. ykw i enjoy it.#organization go brrrrrrr#i dont think she was expecting me to work that fast either but ive been like a feral animal. skittering over clutter.#finding Spots for Things#okay i lied the flood was actually beneficial in one way to me specifically.#estranged father just forgot a Bunch of tool sets here & ive claimed them now fdghjk#that nail gun is MINE#she suggested i look out for an actual tool chest/bench thing (ykw the ones with wheels and stuff) for everything and i havent been that#excited for anything in months fdgh tools are expensive alright. too bad he took the table saw.#i dont talk much abt my Masc Hobbies as i call them lmao no real reason to but hoooboy i love to Build Things#give me that ikea desk ill have it done in an hour or less every time#maybe trade school is still on the horizon for me gfhj always wanted to Weld Stuff i think id be good at it#as much as i fuckin loathe yard maintenance i was a real garage sooooo bad its not even funny#shame i wasnt just inherently expected to know car stuff tm i feel like i would have loved it too#scarrier to learn on your own later in life especially with a lease vehicle but ill get there eventually#anyway yeah bg3! new mods. new ocs#have not done much with them yet but they Exist and theyre pretty
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things that make me wanna do beautiful conceptual illustrations of melliwyk's party's bard's dad
#KADE HEARTWOOD THE MAN THAT YOU ARE.... OOOOUUGGHH#also: thing that makes me realize that kade being Like That was possibly not a coincidence and reaffirms how cool our DM is#my biggest regret in mel's campaign is not dancing with kade during the fancy ball infiltration session and getting to talk to him#because 1) only quinton knew that was his dad and was not on good terms with him-- in-character mel didn't know who he was#and 2) both melliwyk and I in real life got too caught up in 'oh I know EXACTLY which of these people is our mysterious contact'#'haHAA I have Solved Your Puzzle I don't NEED to talk to quinton's dad cause I already know it's not him :D'#[me rattling the bars to my own past] noooo jaaay that's why you talk to EVERYONE ELSE IN THE ROOM FIRST! JAAAY!! LIKE VIDEO GAMES!!! JAAAA#and then later quinton accidentally got him banished back to the afterlife (where he was supposed to have been the whole time)#before we got a chance to MEET HIM AND TALK TO HIM once we KNEW MORE OF HIS SECRETS RAAAAGGGHHH#.... tl;dr kade had been a champion of the raven queen thousands of years ago and we found his dead body sealed in a hidden vault#the kade who fathered quinton was breaking the rules to send his soul out into the world as a living thing (for Reasons)#the risk of which was that his body was Pure Soul-- if he'd died like that it would have destroyed his soul permanently#ANYWAY THIS IS VERY FUNNY TO ME BECAUSE I'M MAKING MYSELF CRY IMAGINING THE ART I WANNA MAKE ABOUT KADE#BUT I DON'T REALLY CARE ABOUT ACTUAL PC QUINTON AT ALL AND FRANKLY HE OFTEN PISSES ME OFF LMAO#melliwyk's DM is one of my favorite DMs and also fellow players because he's Really Fucking Good At This ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#about me
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tomorrow is my first day of classes as I go back to school for the first time in eight years and my family has picked today to blow up at each other and drag me into it
#VERY long story short#after my Papa died my dad buying the house out from my mom became a real possibility again#so all of us slowed down on the house sale stuff#and that included me shifting my focus from packing and looking for a place to getting ready to start school#but as of about two and a half hours ago my father is again freaking the fuck out#and saying we need to have the house ready to go on the market in seven fucking days#bc my mom has asked for a downpayment which he says he can’t afford#(when I asked him how much she was asking for he said he didn’t know. so it’s less ‘can’t’ and more ‘doesn’t want to’ but whatever)#anyway I asked him to ask bc if it comes down to it I would prefer to loan my dad the money for the downpayment#bc in exchange I get stability while I go back to school and the money I lose in interest would just be going to increased rent anyway#so now I get a text from my mother saying ‘do not give your father money for the downpayment’#and I’ve been trying so hard to be supportive of them both without it seeming like I’m ‘taking sides’#but I kind of snapped and said ‘I love you but don’t tell me what to do. I’m not doing this to ‘bail dad out’’#‘I’m doing this bc it’s the best option for me right now.’#and now she’s not responding to me#I fucking hate this#she needs the money. I need a stable place to live. let me loan him the money so YOU have the money mom!#I know you’re worried he won’t pay me back bc he’s proven to be less than honest with his finances in the past but also.#I’m his only kid. not to be macabre but I’ll be getting it back eventually one way or another unless he somehow writes me out of his will.#just fuckin. I’m supposed to be reading through my syllabuses and figuring out bullshit websites for school rn.#I don’t want to be dealing with family drama and impending homelessness rn pls chill#personal
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i just gotta say peoples' obsessions with writing toxic relationships just concerns the shit outta me on this hellsite.
#ooc. your local bodega kat.#[everyone: i love complex relationships! what everyone means: couples fighting is normal! so if they're horrendous to each other#sometimes it's normal!!#couples fight like... of course. it's unhealthy NOT to fight. but there's a level where it's....uhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHH and some of what's said#or done that people condone on here is wild. if i had a nickel for every time i saw someone say their character was a wonderful spouse and#then display like 10 reasons why they're covertly emotionally or verbally abusive. the rpc has such a tendency to refer to dv in one#specific term when it comes to ic ships and it's always physical but everything else is 'complex' and man that's worrying. see also: why#i was taught in grad school never to teach streetcar with marlon brando because students excuse him immediately due to his looks and his#bullshit angst. it's alarming as fuck. coming from parents who were sometimes physically abusive (to me and each other) like... this also#needs to be recognized in self-critical media. there's so much shit that needs evaluating. and it's not like i've never written a toxic#ship. i wrote the fucking WORST on at one point because i was too chickenshit to get alana out of it. and it ended in her being DESTROYED.#you know. like those kind of relationships tend to end in. like. my ex-father beat the fuck out of a dude in a bar who hit on my mom and#then when he found out the guy died a day later it was military or jail and he went military. and then my mom took him BACK. this is REAL#LIFE SHIT. writing it is virtually incredibly depressing and writing it without making clear it's fucked up is worse. whether you've been#through it or not. in that case: why even. shit hurts enough when you go through it. why would you want to vicariously go through it#being a fake person if there was no way to turn the outcome through healing and positive growth. sorry for being an optimist basically.]#domestic violence mention /#domestic abuse mention /#abuse mention /#murder mention /#[i'm just thinking back on the most toxic fucking verse i ever had and how glad i am said person and i no longer speak.]
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When you're feeling down, sad or Feeling Unmotivated, just remember,
At least you didn't born in U.S.A.
#fuck the usa#meme#united states#for real imagine going to school wondering if you will get shot today#one time in my school there was a rumor about a kid saying that that day he was gonna shot everyone there#this was enough for the cops show up#also imagine living knowing that the random crack head can just buy a gun#“my father has a gun” unless your dad is a cop or a drug dealer you will never hear anyone saying that at school#what kind of crazy person really thinks having a gun at home with kids is a good idea#“bullying” my bullying was calling other kids son of bitch#not fucking flushing their head in the toilet#what kind of psychopath does that?!#my country sucks sometimes but in comparison this is paradise#“freedom” HA
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still funny that arakawa wanted to leave an impression/impress ichi when they first met and then bro's surprised when the kid shows up for the next three months. ichi was like a little baby duck and brother arakawa just became a father of two
#snap chats#technically he's always been a father of two but now its official. theyre officially reunited#he said Go Home Dont You Have Parents ??? and ichi said No I Dont and it was officially free real estate#kazama got kids from killing their parents and feeling bad. arakawa gets kids from The Most circumstances imaginable im deceased#yeah you left an impression alright. now the kid's imprinted on you congratulations pops. second-time pops. second-time pops to your bio ki#Its A Thing we know the situation#the concept of animals imprinting is the funniest shit though like its the BABY that goes You're Gonna Parent Me Now :)#anyway i didnt eat today. youd think id feel it but i dont#ill be sure to eat tomorrow its too late in the day to have a meal now#'snap why are you talking about being hungry' because it's explaining my delirium#im always delirious but theres more reason for it now#'snap i thought you just said you couldnt feel it' SSH. accept my excuse......
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Man I love dndads season 2 I wish it was good
#sorryyyyyy you know I have to be on my shit again#(angry posting about Glenn close character assasination)#not defending Glenn or saying he’s a good person or dad#becuase he’s not either of those things but#cmon now folks do u not remember what ONE THIRD of season one is about#sorry glenn wouldn’t fucking do that!!!! the only thing he cares about is Nick!!!!!#once again season one literally ends w glenn going hey I know I’m not your father anymore but I still want to be in your life#I still want to put in the effort#just for him to end up at square one again the next time we see him????#I’m not against a character getting worse#in fact I LOVE it it’s why I think scary and normals arcs are so interesting and fun#but that’s not where Glenn ended#you can’t just have him show up and go btw all the change u saw in season one wasn’t real#and actually he sucks worse now#nothing he went through or did matters lol#it’s dumb!!!#and it makes his WHOLE arc in season one#nothing but pointless martyrdom#sorry this is not really the most articulate#I’m just mad#how come all the other dads get to be their changed fully realized selves#but Glenn gets the shaft#not even saying you couldn’t do the whole ‘there’s no fixing this’ thing#it just should have been done a different way#Glenn could still have been there and Nick could have still held undealt with resentment from when Glenn wasn’t there before#anyway
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it would be nice if actually NMH4 was smart and pulled a whole 'actually the real villain was inter-generational trauma all along!' and that it re-contextualised the overarching narrative of NMH to be about the about the Touchdown Family's struggle to end the toxic cycle of violence that their family has been stuck in.
#I DOUBT NMH4 will be that smart. (assuming it will ever happen) but it would be neat if they did lean into that#the reason why the ending of the cycle is so important is that it kinda adds a nice book end / call back to alice twilight#the whole ‘free us from the red crimson sea of madness!’ as a cry for help by assassins asking Travis to help them leave the life#of being an assassin still kinda gets to me#I mean the whole reason why NMH2 happens is that many of the characters are there BECAUSE of Travis. many envy him because he was the one#that became number one. AND WALKED AWAY.#plus in NMH2 travis says ‘we may be fucked up but assassins are human too’ and GAH HES SO RIGHT ABOUT THAT#like really one thing that does bother me about flesh and blood episode is that Travis is VERY NONCHALANT about killing henry. like hey.#that’s your brother who literally just told you not long ago that he saved you and (their) sister jeane from their father!!!#like?? wouldn’t you have a mental breakdown about that revelation?! like I get human emotions are complex#but like at least SOME FORM OF REMORSE WOULDVE MADE THE SCENE BETTER. even him perhaps scolding Sylvia for being nonchalant about the death#of Henry would have made the situation go from ‘oh god the horror’ to ‘don’t you dare say that about my brother#’he did everything to keep me and my sister safe and you have the audacity to think I was okay with killing him?!’#like seriously where did that small bit of familial bonding/friendship development with Henry and Travis go after NMH2?????#like Henry didn’t just save Travis in the Nick of time with the jasper batt jr fight for NOTHING.#Travis failed to save jeane! so make him at least try to help Henry!! he’s his only real blood relative and knowing the person who’s done#their best to keep you out of very specific life threatening danger - I think you owe your sibling to try and save them from whatever#is happening to them that’s making them take irrational decisions of world domination#SUDA HIRE ME TO BE YOUR WRITER TRUST ME I CAN FIX YOUR SILLY LITTLE UNIVERSE I SWEAR#nomoreposting#suda51posting#nmh3 spoilers#shallow rambles#sorry I’m have deep thoughts about this series and it’s implications sorry#yeah I’m kinda in denial of the whole Henry’s domination of the world thing (not that I hate it!! good for him!!)#but also I wish there was much more build up and development before hand you know? the last time we got development was in NMH2#<- NMH2 was released… 13 years ago and even then henry still doesn’t have that much screentime either so is that even character development#if you’re reading tags. dear goodness thank you for putting up with my ramblings. /GEN
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