#you know like everything else with the skill
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Judging from the comments I feel like a lot of people don't know that small talk is also something a lot of neurotypicals also aren't very good at or like to do? It's something that's socially conditioned as a whole and varies from culture to culture and person to person haha. I'm neurotypical but with pretty bad social anxiety and small talk was never natural for me, I ended up having to consult and take classes for it. It's a skill that has its benefits to learning just like everything else, it doesn't need to be some big revelation that you either do or don't understand if you don't want it to
I'm trying to figure out a good way to say "you really should actually learn the basics of small talk" with sounding like I'm biased against autistic people.
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(im back, christmas break is here!!)
tw: mentions of abuse, violence, sexism (but secondary gender), omegaverse dynamics, crying, heavy angst no aftercare (again)
The uncomfortable tension in the room was palpable as they all sat in their usual debriefing room. Usually, the nest was a place for such a personal and volatile topic such as this, but none of them felt worthy of being there now. Not with how they’d treated you.
Soap was tapping his foot against the floor, the pattern uneven and sporadic, until Gaz snapped at him.
“Could you quit it, mate?” It had come out harsher than he’d meant. Soap huffed through his nose but obliged. They were all tense and on edge, their usually oh-so-controlled scents now sour and bitter with unease and anxiety.
In the field, they had their skills and weapons to fix problems, to take out the enemy. But here, back home? They had absolutely nothing in this fight. No amount of backup or fights could win this for them. In this fight, they were the enemy, and the only way to win this was by fixing the sacred little strand keeping you together that they had so carelessly unwound until it had snapped.
Ghost looked to Price. His hand was in his beard, thoughtfully running through the hair, stressed as Ghost has ever seen him. A sour pang of guilt shot through him. If he hadn’t tried forcing you to his scent gland, then you wouldn’t be in this position, and he wouldn’t have messed everything up, again—
“Y’re thinking too much.”
Price muttered, Simon’s feelings clear through the thick scent that somehow seemed to overpower everyone else’s in the air. He swallowed thickly. They needed a plan of action, some way to fix this, and the only way Price saw things being mended was by a lot of time and effort.
Gaz let the silence simmer for a moment, before speaking up.
“Cane Baker Syndrome, I looked it up yesterday night, it’s just like the med’ said. PTSD. Do you think…?”
An alpha being abused wasn’t as commonplace as it had used to be. Only 50 years ago, if you’d stepped into the common era, you’d see alpha’s being forced to work for a family they’d been forced into providing, their protective instincts abused. Among the more insane practices had been scratching out an alpha’s scent gland, so they couldn’t scent or get attached to their offspring, meaning the omega got the child all to themselves.
Awful things such as that had been outlawed years ago, but still happened in little forgotten corners of the world where loopholes existed.
“We can’t know for sure, but based on their reaction, I’d say we have a safe assumption. When they’re in a better….state of mind, we can ask a few questions.”
Price answered, voice heavy with an edge of guilt that seemed to grow richer by the second. Soap’s incessant tapping started up again, anxiety clearly chewing away at him. He couldn’t defuse you or the situation they’d created so easily like any other bomb he might during a mission.
“Could we get a background check on them?”
He asked, a hint of desperation in his tone. All he wanted was for you to be better again, for things to go back to normal, for a second chance.
But as they all split up, and he went to the nest, usually all so warm and comfortable and smelling of their sweet, rich scents combined, all he found was isolation among his team, sour scents mingling with rotten ones, a few sniffles and the salty scent of tears, he knew one thing.
They’d made their bed. Now they had to lie in it.
(sorry for the short part I’ve been playing cod bo6 multiplayer a lot and I’m kinda addicted + depressive episode, but there’ll be more soon I promise!!)
Part 1 | Part 2 |
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Older bf! Matt and sweetheart! Readers … First kiss
Matt had invited you to his house while his brothers were out to bake cookies. You were excited to spend time together, completely focused on the fun of baking, and still oblivious to the fact that Matt had been flirting with you all along. Little did you know, he had something else in mind for the day…
When you get to his house you knock on the door, excited for the activity he had planned.
Matt opens the door with a warm smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Hey," he greets softly, stepping aside to let you in. He closes the door behind you. "So, I thought we could make the classic, chocolate chip cookies”
“Hi, yeah that sounds perfect.” You say with a soft smile.
Smiling back at you, he leads you to the kitchen. "Come on, I'll get everything laid out." he says, taking out the ingredients and putting them on the counter. "I thought maybe we could make a little tradition of this."
“Yeah! We could even make them depending on the holiday. Like for Christmas we make gingerbread man cookies, for Halloween maybe we could decorate them on theme etc.” You say showing interest in his idea, and helping him out with the ingredients.
He leans against the counter, smiling at your excitement, and can't help but tease gently, "There you go again with your sweet ideas." He pulls out two aprons, one for each of you. "Let me put this on before we make a mess..." He puts his one on and then grabs the other one and walks closer to you to put it on.
You get slightly nervous when he gets close and puts on the apron on you. “We look funny in these.” You chuckle softly.
He chuckles too and ties the apron strings around your waist. "We do, don't we?" He says with a soft smile, his hands lingering on your waist for a moment before he steps back. "Now, let's get started on these cookies, shall we?"
“Let's get started” you agree. You guys start making the cookies, following instructions from a recipe you found online. You start adding and mixing ingredients.
As you work, Matt can't help but steal glances at you, admiring the way you concentrate on the task at hand, the way your hair falls in loose waves around your face, and the way your lips purse slightly as you focus on measuring out the ingredients. But he can’t help wanting a little bit of extra fun. So he puts a bit of flour in his hands and spreads some on your cheek. “Opps, looks like you got something on your cheek.” He laughs.
“Maaatt!” You laugh. “I’m gonna get revenge.” You say as you try to do the same thing he did to you.
He dodges playfully, a wide grin spreading across his face. "Oh no, I don't think so!" He teasingly grabs your wrists just as you're about to flour him, pulling you slightly closer.
“Not fair” you mumble.
"Life's not fair." He teases back, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "But if you play your cards right, maybe I'll let you get me next time." He slowly releases your wrists but remains close.
“Just a tiny bit on your nose pleaseeeee” you ask with a smile.
He pretends to think about it, tapping his finger against his chin dramatically. "Alright, alright. But only a tiny bit, promise?"
“Yeaaaaah only a bit” you say, but take the opportunity and spread flour all over his cheek and a small dot in his nose as you laugh.
He laughs out loud, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "You lied!" He wipes his hands on his apron. "Okay, I guess we’re equal now."
You guys laugh it out and continue with the cookies. Once the dough is done you put them straight in the oven.
“Okay! In 30 minutes we’re gonna have some amazing cookies” you say.
"Thanks to your excellent flouring skills." He teases, still wiping flour from his face. "You know, you're really good at this baking stuff." He compliments softly, his smile warm. "You're really good at a lot of things actually." He says as he steps closer leaving you in between the counter and him.
You get slightly nervous as he gets close again and can’t help but blush a little at his compliments. “Thank you.”
He notices your blush and softly reaches up to brush a slight smudge of flour off your cheek, his fingertips lingering for a moment longer than necessary. The way you react to his compliments makes him want to give you more, to see that pink spread across your cheeks again. "You don't have to be shy around me, you know?”
You get even more nervous and you look away. “I-… I’m not shy, I’m just-”
He tilts your chin up gently with his fingers, forcing you to look at him. "Just what?" He asks softly, his voice low and gentle. His eyes search yours, looking for the answer in their depths.
“Well… maybe a little shy,” you admit.
He chuckles softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "A little shy?" He repeats, his thumb gently rubbing your chin. "I think you're more than a little shy." He teases gently. His eyes are locked with yours as he gets even more closer. “Can I kiss you?”
You’re shocked by his question. You don’t know what to answer. So you just slur out the first thing that came to your mind. “I- I’ve never kissed.”
His heart skips a beat at your response. He gently lifts his hand and brushes a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering on your skin. "You've never kissed anyone before?" He asks, his voice barely above a whisper. Well what else could he expect from someone as innocent and shy as you, he thinks.
You shake your head feeling slightly embarrassed.
He smiles softly, his heart melting at your shy demeanor. "And here I thought you were just really good at playing hard to get." He jokes lightly. He steps even closer, one hand still gently pressed against your waist while the other cups your face. "Would you... let me be your first?" He asks, his voice tender and respectful.
A pink shade spreads through your cheeks as you feel even more nervous. But your head nods yes.
He lets out a soft sigh of relief as he gently leans in, his lips pressing softly against yours in a gentle, sweet kiss. It's a kiss filled with tenderness and care, as if he's treating something precious. His hand at your waist tightens slightly as he deepens the kiss gently. While you kiss back trying to mimic his movements.
A soft smile curls his lips at your innocent attempt to mimic him. He gently slides his hand up to cup the back of your neck, while keeping the kiss slow and tender. After a moment, he pulls back slightly to look at your flushed face. "Perfect.”
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02. The Gentleman — By Order of the Black Pirates
An 'Ice On My Teeth' Comeback Special Series
Pairing: gang member!Seonghwa x fem!reader
AU: gang au
Word Count: 21.5k
Summary: The Black Pirates' poised diplomat, celebrated for his refined demeanour, sharp wit, and unmatched negotiation skills, is always in control. But his composure falters when he encounters an unwilling captive trapped in the Red Room—a ruthless training ground for spies. Driven by an unexpected urge to save her, he finds his carefully maintained boundaries beginning to unravel.
Genre: angst, hurt/comfort
Trigger Warnings: violence, torture, abuse, human experimentation, scars, murder, language, contains dark themes in general
SERIES MASTERLIST | ATEEZ MASTERLIST
"Ooh, look who's in charge of the Red Room alliance now," Wooyoung teased, sauntering into Seonghwa's office with his usual swagger. The eldest, meticulously double-checking the contents of his briefcase for the upcoming critical meeting, barely spared him a glance. "I'm busy," he muttered, rolling his eyes. "Go bother someone else."
Unfazed, the Charmer smirked and plopped into his brother's vacant chair, spinning it around before propping his legs up on the desk. "Oh, come on, hyung. You're about to be surrounded by women—not just any women, mind you—the finest of the fine. Think you could put in a good word for me? Maybe convince Hongjoong hyung to let me tag along? You know we'd make an unbeatable duo." He winked cheekily, his grin as mischievous as ever.
Seonghwa sighed, snapping his briefcase shut and securing the safe after confirming everything was in place. He turned to face the younger man, his expression deadpan. "You? Of all people?" he scoffed. "I'd sooner bring Yunho—if only he were available. A word of advice: focus on your own mission. You can't even handle one bodyguard, let alone navigate an entire organisation of trained spies."
Wooyoung gasped dramatically, clutching his chest in mock offense. "Ouch, hyung! Why so harsh? Last I checked, Cap's the one nursing a broken heart, not you."
At that, the Gentleman's demeanour shifted, his gaze sharp as he stepped forward and smacked the younger man's feet off the desk. Wooyoung stumbled forward with a surprised yelp, glaring up at the elder. "That's quite enough, Woo," Seonghwa said sternly. "I'd advise you not to push your luck with Hongjoong right now. One Mingi is already more than enough."
There it was—the unshakable calm and maturity of the Black Pirates' eldest member. Even the most chaotic among them couldn't rattle him. Recognising defeat, Wooyoung grinned sheepishly, standing to nod at his brother. "Fine, I'll behave since you asked so nicely," he mused, watching Seonghwa nod in approval and stride toward the door. "Safe journey, hyung. Get back in one piece."
The taller man paused, glancing over his shoulder to offer one of his rare, gentle smiles. "I will," he replied confidently. "When have I ever let you down?"
For fuck's sake, who the hell was I kidding?
Now, he wished he could smack himself across the face for his foolish confidence. If only he had known how it would all turn out, how the plan would go sideways so suddenly. He reclined against the stiff guest room bed, the pristine white ceiling offering no answers to the storm brewing in his mind. He rubbed his face with both hands, trying to sort through the frustration. The weight of his earlier decisions pressed against his chest like an iron vice.
Just what in the world was he doing? He replayed the day in his head for the thousandth time, dissecting every detail. The mission had started seamlessly—his confidence unshakable. He had left the mansion that morning, projecting the poise expected of the Gentleman, cautioning his brothers to behave in his absence, and promising Hongjoong he'd return triumphant.
His arrival at the spy training facility had gone smoothly, his awe carefully masked by quiet professionalism. The place's grandeur was undeniable—dark, imposing, yet breathtaking in its meticulous design. He marvelled silently at how these women had built something so formidable, so self-sufficient, despite centuries of systemic oppression.
The security was tight, the multiple checks before getting to the building's main entrance were a testament to their efficiency. By the time he was greeted by Madame Scarlet, an elegant woman who appeared to be in her fifties and the enigmatic founder of the Red Room, his admiration had only deepened.
"We hope you had a wonderful journey here. The Red Room welcomes you, Captain Kim of the Black Pirates," the woman had said, her tone formal yet inviting.
Seonghwa had bowed lightly, offering his most disarming smile. "Thank you, Madame. But I must clarify—the Captain was unable to attend due to urgent matters back home. I am his right hand. You may call me Gentleman Park."
The lady's subtle reaction—a raised brow and the slightest tightening of her lips—didn't escape his notice. Still, he handled the rest of the meeting with the same elegance, navigating their discussions with ease. Everything had been on track.
Until it wasn't.
One step—one final step—was all it took to close the deal and forge the alliance. All he had to do was say yes and sign the contract. He cursed under his breath, recalling the words that had left his mouth—words that had deviated from every carefully laid plan.
"I would like to think this over a bit more. While I agree that this would be in both parties' best interests, I would just like to spend some more time here to have a clearer picture of how things work, to better understand our ally, if you will. I hope that's alright with you."
The room had stilled, the practised neutrality of the Red Room's representatives masking their surprise. But one person couldn't hide their reaction—the sole reason for this madness—you.
He saw it, the way your shoulders stiffened, the slight lift of your head as you dared to glance his way. Your wide eyes met his, and for a fleeting moment, the world around him disappeared.
That moment was his undoing.
It was supposed to be simple: finalise the alliance, leave without looking back, and report a flawless success to Hongjoong. But you... you had thrown a wrench into his perfect plan.
The deal could have been closed smoothly, had it not been for one of the trainees who captured his attention almost the moment he stepped through the doors. You stood out like a sore thumb among the neat lines of female operatives in training—your trembling eyes and subtle gulp betraying your struggle to hold back tears. Maybe you were just having a bad day, he reasoned, perhaps a failed performance during a gruelling session. Training couldn't be easy here; the Red Room was notorious for its brutality.
But his curiosity refused to fade. Throughout the visit, his gaze kept drifting to your fragile, trembling figure trailing behind Madame Scarlet and her trusted aide. It wasn't just your withdrawn demeanour or the way you seemed to shrink into yourself—it was the unmistakable fear etched across your features. Pure, unadulterated terror surfaced when a trainer called on you, and in that fleeting moment when your eyes met his, there was desperation—a silent plea for help that cut through his composure like a blade.
You didn't belong here, not even the slightest. Something deep within him stirred, a compulsion he couldn't ignore—a need to act, to intervene, to save you.
His reasons for staying defied logic, and he knew it. By lingering, he jeopardised the alliance, risked his position in the gang, and invited potentially disastrous consequences. Yet the pull was undeniable—an unrelenting drive to uncover the truth about you and why he couldn't let you become just another face in his memory.
Now, in the stillness of the guest room, Seonghwa sat up, elbows resting on his knees, his head cradled in his hands. With you finally out of sight and his mind beginning to clear, the sharp sting of rationality returned. He couldn't help but imagine how the rest of the gang would react once they learned of his recklessness. Everyone had trusted him to seal this alliance, especially Hongjoong. The man was already grappling with enough turmoil—this was the last thing he needed.
And then there was Mingi. If he messed this up, the Firestarter would never let him or the Captain live it down. Not that the tall bastard's teasing mattered in the grand scheme of things, but the stakes here were monumental. This alliance was vital; without it, the White Serpents could easily exploit their instability. So, what the hell was he doing, letting himself get derailed by a girl—a trainee, no less? If only he had minded his own business, he'd already be on his way home, mission accomplished.
But no, here he was...
Yet, deep down, he couldn't shake the memory of your terrified expression. That raw, unfiltered fear—it wasn't something he'd seen in a long time. Not like this. Fear wasn't new to him; in their line of work, it was an almost daily occurrence. But those pleas for mercy typically came from people who deserved their fate, criminals and scumbags who'd wronged others. This, however, was different. Your fear wasn't rooted in guilt but in helplessness.
For a brief moment, Seonghwa wondered if this was what Hongjoong had seen, too. Was this the same spark that had ignited his leader's own impulsive choices?
Shaking his head, he let out a quiet groan. Even if he wanted to help you, how? He had no plan, no resources. He was alone here, without the gang's collective strength. Yunho and Yeosang's clever solutions weren't at his disposal, nor were San and Mingi's brute force. Jongho's unshakable composure, which always kept their missions on track, was sorely missed. Hell, he even found himself longing for Wooyoung's antics, if only to lighten the suffocating tension.
If Hongjoong were here, none of this would have happened. The Captain would have stayed focused, unyielding. But then... what would have become of you?
"Goddamnit," he muttered under his breath, the weight of frustration and uncertainty bearing down on him. He dragged a hand through his hair, his voice dropping into a bitter whisper. "We're fucked."
ـــــــــــــــﮩ٨ـ
The dim light of your cell-like room flickered faintly, casting long shadows against the stark walls. Sleep, elusive as ever, teased the edges of your consciousness but refused to claim you. Your mind was restless, tumbling through a cascade of thoughts, and for the first time in what felt like an eternity, they weren't entirely about the nightmare you endured daily.
They were about him.
The man—the Gentleman, as Madame Scarlet had introduced him—was unlike anyone you'd seen before, not just because he was the first male face in years, but because he looked at you as though you were more than just another broken thing in this place. His dark eyes had lingered on you, his gaze following you like a soft, unspoken question. You felt it, even when you tried not to.
You had no idea why he stayed. It was madness, sheer idiocy, for him to risk what should have been a clean, uncomplicated deal. That was how it always worked—outsiders came, signed the agreement, and left as fast as they arrived, never daring to peel back the pristine mask of the Red Room's operations. But he didn't follow the script.
Why?
The question burned in your chest, twisting into an unfamiliar ache. You wished it were annoyance, that you could dismiss him as another arrogant man playing a dangerous game. But it wasn't. It was fear—raw and desperate fear—not for yourself, but for him.
He had no idea what he had walked into. You could tell he wasn't oblivious; his calculating demeanour and sharp wit proved that much. But he was still a fool to stay. What did he hope to accomplish? Surely, it wasn't because of you.
Your heightened senses—the ones the Red Room had painstakingly sharpened until they bled into paranoia—picked up on every stolen glance, every small, deliberate movement. From the moment he entered, you knew he had noticed you, not just as an anomaly but as something... else. You'd been trained to anticipate motives, to understand what people wanted, but his attention baffled you.
It scared you.
The others didn't miss his glances, either. You'd caught the sidelong looks of the senior operatives, the way Madame Scarlet's lips had curved just slightly at the edges, a subtle acknowledgement that she was watching too. It was only a matter of time before they decided he was a liability.
If he stayed, they'd break him.
You clenched your fists tightly against the rough sheets beneath you, trying to quell the overwhelming tide of emotions threatening to drown you. Emotions—weaknesses, as they called them here—were the enemy. You had learned that the hard way. But now, despite everything, your heart betrayed you, pounding with the terrible clarity that he wouldn't last a day if he truly understood what went on here.
You shut your eyes, trying to block out the memory of his face, his voice, the ridiculous bravery in his words as he locked eyes with you and said he needed more time. If he knew—if he lived even a fraction of what you endured—he would've bolted at the first opportunity.
"Fool," you whispered into the stillness, your voice barely audible over the quiet hum of the facility. "What did you get yourself into?"
You hated him for staying, for giving you this fragile, fleeting sense of hope that things could change. You hated him for being so careless with his life. And yet, more than anything, you hated yourself for wishing—just for a moment—that he might be strong enough to do what you couldn't.
Run. Escape. Fight.
Save himself.
Because if he stayed, the Red Room would devour him whole, just as it had done to you.
Perhaps it was already beginning to.
On the other side of the building, the guest room felt colder than it should have. Seonghwa, too, lay sprawled on the rigid mattress, the pristine white walls around him offering no comfort, no reprieve from the maelstrom of thoughts battering his mind. He flipped onto his side, then his back, then his stomach, a frustrated growl escaping his lips as sleep evaded him entirely.
His mind was a battlefield, each thought warring for dominance. Was this all a trap?
It would make sense. The Red Room was too efficient, too methodical, to let someone like you slip through the cracks unnoticed. Maybe your fear, your weakness—it was all calculated. Perhaps they had planted you there, your trembling frame meant to bait him, to test him. Maybe the terror in your eyes wasn't actual terror at all but a meticulously crafted act designed to lure him into a false sense of sympathy.
What if you were a rebel?
His fists clenched tightly against the sheets, jaw set as the possibility burned in his mind. If you were working against the Red Room, you'd have every reason to use him, to exploit the cracks in this precarious alliance. And if you weren't a rebel, then what? Were you a spy? An assassin in training? A failure?
"Dammit," he muttered, running a hand through his dark hair. He couldn't shake the image of you—those wide, haunted eyes that seemed to plead with him, even though you hadn't said a single word. He cursed himself for the millionth time that night.
This wasn't like him.
He wasn't the kind of man who acted rashly. Calculated precision was his forte, keeping his emotions locked behind an impenetrable wall. Yet the moment he saw you, it was as though something inside him had cracked, and all the logic he prided himself on was thrown to the wind.
What the hell was he doing?
His brothers were counting on him. Hongjoong, who had trusted him enough to send him in the Captain's stead; Yunho, who would've meticulously planned every contingency if only he'd been given more time; Yeosang, who'd always had a knack for seeing through deceptions; Mingi and San, whose combined strength could've handled this mess in a fraction of the time. Even Jongho, with his unflappable calm, would've been a better choice to stand in this precarious position.
And Wooyoung... God, Wooyoung would never let him live this down.
The Gentleman sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed, head cradled in his hands again. He felt the weight of their expectations, of the responsibility he carried, bearing down on him like an iron chain. He had to get this done. He had to sign the deal, leave, and return home with good news.
Not fuck this up over some girl.
You weren't supposed to matter. You were just another face, another casualty of this ruthless place. He had seen plenty like you before—broken people trapped in broken systems. He had told himself he was immune to that kind of thing, that the world was too harsh for him to care.
And yet, when he thought of you, the logic he so carefully cultivated unravelled.
The terror in your eyes wasn't like the fear he was used to seeing—the kind born of guilt or desperation. This was deeper, rawer, something that twisted in his chest in a way he didn't understand.
And he hated it.
He hated that he was here, that he'd let himself get dragged into this, that he'd let himself care.
But no matter how much he hated it, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was already in too deep.
"Tomorrow," he muttered, his voice a low growl in the empty room. "I'll get it done tomorrow."
He repeated the words like a mantra, as if saying them enough times would make them true. He would go through with the deal, close this chapter, and walk away.
But deep down, he knew the truth.
Things weren't really going to go his way.
ـــــــــــــــﮩ٨ـ
Come on, you can do this.
It has been hours since the chamber door hissed shut with a deafening finality, the sound echoing in the narrow space like a harbinger of dread. You sat on the cold metal chair, your wrists clamped to the armrests by invisible shackles of terror. The fluorescent lights buzzed above you, their harsh glare illuminating every crack and scratch on the otherwise featureless walls. No windows. No exit. Just four oppressive walls closing in on you with every passing second.
The robotic voice came through the unseen speakers again, its clinical tone devoid of any humanity.
"How do you feel?"
Regret. Endless regret.
You squeezed your eyes shut, teeth clenched as if that could hold back the flood of emotions threatening to betray you. Your hands trembled in your lap, but you forced them still, your fingernails digging into your palms hard enough to draw blood.
"Nothing," you whispered, the lie cracking in your throat.
The tears you had fought so hard to suppress welled up in your eyes. Regret clawed at your insides like a caged animal, howling against the walls of your mind. It had been there since the day you were dragged into this living nightmare, growing stronger with every dehumanising test, every soul-crushing exercise designed to strip you of your essence. But they couldn't know. They could never know.
"Tell the truth. How do you feel?"
The voice was a hammer against the brittle shell of your composure, striking again and again.
You let out a shaky breath, your chest tightening as if a vice had clamped around your lungs. "Nothing," you repeated, louder this time, willing yourself to believe it even as the walls seemed to close in on you.
The isolation chamber had become your recurring purgatory. You had been here so many times you'd lost count, but the panic never abated. No matter how many hours you spent in its suffocating grip, the claustrophobia seeped into your bones like a cold fog.
The lights dimmed suddenly, plunging you into darkness. You stiffened, knowing what was coming next. A low hum reverberated through the walls, growing louder until it drowned out the sound of your own heartbeat. The vibrations rattled the chair beneath you, a disorienting rhythm meant to shake loose any remnants of control you clung to.
Your mind spiralled back to where it all began.
Regret.
You were just a struggling college student, barely scraping by, when you saw the advertisement. It promised compensation for volunteers to participate in what seemed like harmless clinical trials or government-sponsored programmes. The language was vague, but the money was too tempting to ignore. You signed up, thinking it was your ticket to financial stability.
And then they took you.
Regret.
You learned too late what you had walked into—a secret experiment buried in the heart of this monstrous training facility. Madame Scarlet's calculating gaze haunted you at every turn, her icy demeanour radiating an unsettling confidence. She watched your every move, her success hinging on breaking you, the so-called pioneer of their new programme.
Regret.
You were their first, their proof of concept. The goal: emotion suppression and control. To strip operatives of fear, guilt, and compassion, leaving only a cold, efficient shell. They chose you because of your heightened emotional sensitivity, believing that if they could break someone like you, they could break anyone.
And so they broke you.
The lights flickered back on, brighter this time, the sudden glare piercing your eyes like needles. Your breathing quickened, panic clawing at your throat, but you swallowed it down. You couldn't let them win.
"Repeat your response. How do you feel?"
Your lips quivered, the taste of iron on your tongue from where you had bitten the inside of your cheek. You couldn't let them see.
"Nothing at all," you said, the word hollow and lifeless.
The voice paused, as if deliberating. Then, with clinical detachment: "Well done, Subject 01. See you in your next session."
The door hissed open, and you sagged in the chair, your body trembling with the effort of holding yourself together. You were alive. For now. But the endless regret followed you like a shadow, a constant reminder of what you'd lost and what you could never reclaim.
Fortunately or unfortunately, you weren't the only one drowning in regret. Unbeknownst to you, someone else shared the same sentiment.
The dining room exuded a haunting elegance, its dark, polished wood surfaces and deep red drapes creating an ambience that felt both regal and oppressive. Seonghwa sat stiffly at the long table, his hands clasped on the white tablecloth as he worked to maintain a composed exterior. The weight of his regrets pressed down on him like an anchor, but his resolve was firm.
Today, he would end this. No more distractions. No more detours.
He tightened his tie, adjusted his cuffs, and forced a charming smile onto his face as Madame Scarlet settled into the seat opposite him, her presence both commanding and chilling. Her sharp gaze landed on him, and he inclined his head respectfully.
"Good morning, Gentleman Park. I trust you had a restful night?" she greeted, her voice smooth and calculated.
"Good morning, Madame. I did, thank you," he lied, his tone courteous but distant.
This was it. Today was the day he would close the deal, leave this place behind, and never look back. No more pity for doomed souls. No more foolish meddling. He had learned his lesson the hard way.
He was done—done trying to help people whose fates were already sealed. He should have learned from his past mistakes, should have known better than to get involved. But flashes of a helpless child's face resurfaced in his mind, haunting him. He squeezed his eyes shut momentarily, willing the image away.
That child… the one he'd thought he was saving, only for his interference to lead to a fate worse than the one he'd tried to prevent. The memory was a dagger he couldn't dull. He had sworn back then that he was finished with helping anyone. From the moment he became a sworn member of the Black Pirates, he had vowed to leave his misguided sense of justice behind.
With a deep breath, he straightened his suit, slicked back his hair, and forced his face into an impassive mask.
This is it—no more nonsense.
But then you entered the room, and every shred of determination faltered. Oh, fuck me.
Your entrance was unassuming, yet the impact was seismic. The elegant wisteria ruffle lace ballerina dress you wore flowed around you like a delicate mist, a stark contrast to the utilitarian uniform he had seen you in the day before. You looked almost otherworldly, as though you didn't belong to this cold, merciless world.
His breath caught, and he cursed himself silently. He quickly averted his gaze, chastising himself for the slip. But it was too late—the image of you was already seared into his mind.
You bowed respectfully to the founder, then to him, your movements poised but weighed down by an invisible heaviness he couldn't ignore.
"Ah yes," the lady said, a hint of amusement lacing her words. "Our star trainee has arrived. Gentleman Park, you mentioned wanting to better understand our work and methods. As requested, we have arranged for only our best girl to accompany you."
Seonghwa's polite smile tightened, his jaw clenching slightly at her words. Our best girl.
The way she said it unsettled him, her tone almost lecherous, as though you were a prized possession rather than a person. He caught a fleeting look in your eyes—disgust, fear, or perhaps both—before you quickly masked it with a practised smile.
His stomach churned. Something was deeply wrong here.
You moved to take the seat beside him, your steps graceful but hesitant, as though the act of simply approaching carried an unspoken risk. He noticed the stiffness in your posture, the way your hands folded tightly in your lap as if to stop them from trembling.
The elderly woman continued speaking, her voice droning on, but the gang member could no longer focus. He nodded along automatically, his mind elsewhere.
You were too composed, too controlled. Every subtle movement screamed restraint, like a bird in a gilded cage. And while he knew the Red Room's operatives were trained to suppress emotion, there was something uniquely disconcerting about your demeanour. This wasn't the hardened stoicism of a seasoned spy. This was survival.
Why were you so different from the others? Why were you here?
The questions swirled relentlessly in his mind, chipping away at the resolve he had built that morning. Curiosity gnawed at him, and worse—a protective instinct he didn't want to feel.
He stole a glance at you, catching the way your gaze remained fixed downward, avoiding both him and Madame Scarlet. The tension in your shoulders was palpable, and he swore he could feel the unease radiating from you.
What were they doing to you?
The founder's voice snapped him back to reality.
"Gentleman Park, I trust you will find her guidance enlightening. She is one of our finest examples of what the Red Room can achieve."
He forced another smile, though his mind was spinning. "I look forward to it," he replied smoothly.
Beside him, you shifted slightly, your hands tightening in your lap. He wondered if anyone else noticed the subtle cracks in your otherwise perfect facade.
As the conversation continued, Seonghwa found it harder to concentrate. The more he observed you, the more his suspicions grew. Every interaction, every gesture seemed to hint at something darker lurking beneath the surface.
And despite the thousand regrets that weighed on him, despite his earlier resolve to stay detached, he felt the pull again—that unshakable need to understand. To help.
But helping had only ever led to ruin.
Under the table, his fists clenched in frustration. No more distractions, he told himself, repeating the mantra like a prayer.
Yet as you sat quietly beside him, your presence a silent cry for help, he couldn't help but feel that fate had other plans.
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The dining room was suffocating. Every clink of cutlery, every flicker of the ornate chandelier above, felt like a weight pressing down on you. You sat rigid in your chair, the elegant wisteria dress clinging to you uncomfortably—a constant reminder of how little say you had in your own existence here.
The meal in front of you might as well have been poison for all the effort it took to take a bite. Every mouthful felt like swallowing stones, your throat tightening against the gnawing anxiety twisting in your gut. You tried to focus on anything but the endless discomfort—tried to ignore the way your skin crawled at the thought of what Madame Scarlet had planned for you.
Your mind drifted back to earlier, to the icy shower they'd thrown you into after pulling you from the isolation chamber. You'd been scrubbed raw, the roughness of their hands leaving you feeling violated, though that was nothing new. That had been your reality since the day you were dragged into this hell. But today was different. Today, they'd put you in this dress.
You knew what it meant.
The dress marked you as "special," a chosen one to entertain the esteemed guest. But this dress… this wasn't like the others. The fine fabric and intricate lace were almost too much, too extravagant. And that terrified you. This wasn't going to be simple. Whatever they had planned for you—and perhaps for him—wasn't ordinary.
You risked a glance at the man seated beside you. Gentleman Park of the Black Pirates. He didn't belong here, not like the others you'd encountered before. He was the only one foolish enough to willingly extend his stay in this nightmare.
Why?
Before you could dwell on the question, the elderly woman's smooth voice broke through your thoughts. She was halfway through one of her rehearsed speeches—the kind meant to dazzle and manipulate—when her right-hand woman entered the room, leaning down to whisper something in her ear.
Her sharp eyes flickered, and she nodded, her painted lips curving into a smile. "Goodness, I'm so sorry to have to excuse myself, but there is an important phone call that I must take," she said, her tone dripping with saccharine politeness.
The man beside you inclined his head slightly. "Of course," he replied, his voice courteous but distant.
Madame Scarlet turned to you then, and you immediately straightened in your seat, your spine going rigid under her gaze.
"I shall leave you in the good hands of our chosen one," she announced, her smile growing sharper. The weight of her words made your stomach churn, and your blood turned cold as she continued, "I trust you to take care of our guest, darling. Show him around a bit, dance for him, won't you? Do what you do best."
Her wink sent a shiver down your spine.
"The success of this deal depends on you, I'm afraid," she added with a lilting laugh that felt like nails against your skin.
You swallowed hard, lowering your gaze as you bowed your head. "Yes, ma'am," you said softly, your voice steady despite the panic clawing at your insides.
The Gentleman beside you cleared his throat, the sound breaking the heavy silence. "Don't worry about it, Madame," he said, offering a polite smile. "I'm sure this young miss will do excellently."
You caught the faintest flicker of tension in his jaw as he spoke, his discomfort almost palpable. But that didn't stop the lady from seizing the opportunity to twist his words.
"Oh, I'm sure she will," she said, her grin turning suggestive, her tone dripping with implication.
The room seemed to freeze.
You felt your cheeks flush with humiliation, though you forced your expression to remain neutral. This was nothing new; you were used to being reduced to a pawn in their games, to being paraded and objectified.
But the gang member's reaction caught you off guard. His polite smile faltered ever so slightly, and you saw the flicker of realisation in his eyes—realisation of how his words had been twisted. He cringed, his discomfort evident as he averted his gaze, a faint flush colouring his cheeks.
"I didn't mean it like that," he murmured, almost to himself.
But the damage was done. Madame Scarlet's laughter echoed through the room as she swept out, leaving you alone with him.
The silence that followed was suffocating. You kept your gaze fixed downward, your hands folded tightly in your lap as you tried to make yourself invisible.
For his part, Seonghwa stared at the table, his mind racing. He hadn't meant it that way, hadn't meant to disrespect you or contribute to whatever hell you were enduring here. But the way the elderly woman had twisted his words, the way she'd left you here as if you were some sort of offering… it churned his stomach.
The tension in the room was suffocating, thick enough to choke on. You tried to steady your trembling hands by folding them in your lap, resisting the urge to fidget.
He cleared his throat again, shifting uncomfortably in his chair. He could still feel the weight of the founder's suggestive tone lingering in the air, her insinuations poisoning the atmosphere even after she was gone.
You didn't dare to look at him, your eyes fixed on the untouched plate of food in front of you. The silence stretched between you, heavy and oppressive, broken only by the distant clinking of cutlery from the other rooms.
He studied you from the corner of his eye, his brows furrowing slightly. There was something deeply wrong about all of this. He couldn't place it exactly, but your subdued, tense demeanour set off alarm bells in his head.
"Look, I... I really didn't mean it like that," he said suddenly, his voice low but firm.
You blinked, startled by his words. Slowly, you turned your head to glance at him, wary and confused.
"I mean what I said earlier," he clarified, his expression earnest now. "About you doing excellent. I just meant… I trust you're good at what you do. Whatever that may be."
Your lips twitched in the faintest semblance of a bitter smile, but it didn't reach your eyes. Good at what I do? You wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it. What were you even supposed to be good at here? Surviving? Being obedient? Being… entertaining?
"Thank you," you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. It was the safest response you could muster, even though the words felt hollow.
Seonghwa's jaw tightened. Your tone only deepened the unease coiling in his chest. He leaned back slightly, forcing a casual posture, though his mind was anything but at ease. "They really put a lot of pressure on you, don't they?"
Your fingers tightened in your lap, but you didn't answer. It wasn't safe to.
"I'm sorry," he added after a pause, his voice softer this time. "If I made you uncomfortable earlier."
His apology caught you off guard. You glanced at him again, searching his face for any sign of insincerity. But his eyes—dark and guarded—seemed genuine.
"It's fine," you murmured, though the words tasted bitter on your tongue.
It wasn't fine. Nothing about this was fine.
The silence that followed was heavier than before. The man struggled to focus on the reason he was here, on the deal he needed to secure, but your presence was proving to be a distraction—a quiet, aching reminder of things he'd tried so hard to bury.
He hadn't come here to get involved. He hadn't come here to care.
But the way you sat there, so small and subdued, made it impossible not to wonder. Impossible not to remember.
His thoughts drifted unwillingly to a certain little boy from his past—the one he had failed so utterly, so completely. The one whose blood was on his hands, no matter how many times he told himself he'd been trying to do the right thing.
And here you were now, another fragile soul caught in a similar cruel web.
He clenched his fists under the table, willing himself to stay focused. He couldn't let himself care. Not again.
But then you spoke, your voice trembling just enough to make his heart lurch.
"What deal is she making with you?" you asked cautiously, barely looking at him. "If you don't mind me asking."
The question threw him. For a moment, he didn't know how to answer. Madame Scarlet's words echoed in his mind: The success of this deal depends on you.
He hesitated, studying your expression. Your guarded eyes, the slight furrow of your brows, the way your hands trembled ever so slightly in your lap—it all spoke of someone desperate for answers, for any shred of control in a situation that offered none.
"I'm here for… business," he said vaguely, trying to sound nonchalant.
You didn't press him further, but your expression betrayed your thoughts. Business. Of course. That's all anyone came here for. Deals made in shadows, forged with blood and broken spirits.
He didn't miss the way your gaze dropped back to your lap, your shoulders sagging slightly as though his answer had only confirmed what you already knew.
Something twisted in his chest—a pang of guilt, perhaps, or regret. He wasn't sure anymore.
"Listen…" he began, his voice low and hesitant. "Whatever this is… whatever they're making you do…"
You looked at him sharply, your eyes wide with alarm. "Don't," you whispered urgently, cutting him off.
Seonghwa froze, startled by the intensity of your reaction.
"Please... don't say anything," you said, your voice trembling but firm. "It'll only make things worse."
The fear in your voice was palpable, and it hit him like a punch to the gut.
He nodded slowly, though the knot in his stomach only tightened. He didn't know what they'd done to you—what they were still doing—but he knew enough to see the cracks in your facade, the quiet desperation you tried so hard to hide.
And despite every warning screaming at him to stay out of it, he felt the pull again. That damnable instinct to help. To fix. To save.
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"Dance for him, won't you?"
The phrase echoed in your head, relentless as you changed out of the heels they'd given you and slipped on your worn pointe shoes. Your fingers trembled as you tied the ribbons securely, each movement automatic from years of practice. Ballet—your biggest nightmare—had been drilled into you until it became second nature. It was one of the Red Room's many requirements, justified with cold rationale: flexibility, endurance, stealth, elegance, performance. They were all virtues of an operative, but here, ballet wasn't just about utility. It was a tool of awe and seduction, a weapon veiled in grace.
Perhaps, on some cruel level, this was what you did best—or what you were left with no choice but to excel at.
You stepped into the mirrored practice room, the walls reflecting infinite versions of yourself. The grand mirrors felt more like prison bars than windows of elegance.
And there he was. Seonghwa sat stiffly in the centre of the room, the single chair isolating him like a king on a throne. Except he didn't look like a king. He looked like a man caught in the wrong place, his discomfort etched into every line of his tense body. His hands gripped his knees as though anchoring himself, and when you entered, his gaze darted to you and quickly away again, like he couldn't bear to watch but couldn't bring himself to look away.
You curtsied, the movement sharp and deliberate, your head dipping just enough to complete the mockery of submission. "Enjoy the show, Gentleman Park," you said, your voice carrying an edge of bitter politeness.
His jaw tensed as he sat up straighter, trying to project composure. "Please, you don't have to do this," he said, his voice tight, a plea slipping through the cracks.
A smile ghosted across your lips, brittle and humourless. If only that were true. Madame Scarlet's orders weren't optional. If you refused, she would know. She always knew. And the consequences of disobedience… No, there was no room for refusal.
"Nonsense," you said, shaking your head as though dismissing his concern. "You are our esteemed guest, and I have been bestowed with the duty of entertaining you. So, please—allow me to do what I do best." The words were delivered with a practised calmness, but the insincerity in them hung heavy in the air.
Seonghwa slumped back into his chair, defeated. He didn't believe you, and you didn't expect him to. His hands fidgeted on his lap, his fingers clenching and unclenching as he watched you take your place. The way you carried yourself—head high, movements precise—might have fooled anyone else into thinking you were eager, even proud. But he wasn't fooled. He could see the misery you carried like a weight on your shoulders, even as you rose to your full height, poised and elegant.
And then you began.
The first step was light, a delicate glide that barely disturbed the air. Each movement flowed seamlessly into the next, your arms creating arcs of motion while your legs executed every step with breathtaking precision. The choreography was mesmerising, a performance of impossible beauty.
But to him, it was unbearable.
You were stunning—he couldn't deny that—but beneath the grace and poise, he saw the truth. Every pirouette, every leap, every extension of your arm carried the bitterness of a caged bird forced to sing. This wasn't a gift. It was a sentence.
He clenched his fists in his lap, nails digging into his palms. This was his fault. If he hadn't asked to stay, hadn't let Madame Scarlet pull him into this world, you wouldn't be here, dancing for him like a puppet on strings. He should have known better. He always did this—lingered too long, cared too much, and inevitably made things worse.
When will I learn?
His gaze dropped to the floor as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block out the image of you, but it was futile. Flashes of the past flooded his mind. The boy's face haunted him—a child he'd thought he was saving. His naivety had cost that boy everything.
He could still feel the small hand clinging to his, the hope in the boy's eyes as Seonghwa had whispered promises of escape. He had meant well, but his actions had backfired spectacularly. The traffickers had found them, dragged the boy back, and exacted a punishment so horrific that he could barely think of it without feeling sick.
He had thought himself a hero, but he had been a fool. Good intentions didn't save anyone—they only destroyed.
Now, as he sat there, forced to watch your anguish play out in the guise of artistry, that guilt returned with a vengeance. He wanted to save you, to rise from his chair and demand that you stop. But what good would it do? He knew better. Intervening would only bring more pain, more suffering, and this time, it would be yours.
"No more," he whispered to himself, his voice trembling. "No more of this madness."
As you spun into another turn, the sight of his head bowed, his attention elsewhere, sent a jolt of despair through you. I've already lost him, you thought, the words clawing at your confidence. A failure, even at this. So much for excellence. The self-criticism came sharp and unrelenting, and in your distraction, you misstepped. Your foot slipped out from under you, and you tumbled forward, a small, startled yelp escaping your lips.
The sound shattered his trance. His head snapped up, eyes wide with alarm. In an instant, he was on his feet and kneeling before you. The swiftness of his reaction caught you off guard, but it was the touch that followed that left you paralysed. His gloved hands found your bare shoulders, steadying you with gentleness so foreign, so alien to you, it almost broke you.
Concern radiated from him—real and unguarded. It was something you hadn't felt in so long that it almost hurt more than the fall. Your chest tightened, the ache unbearable. Why was he doing this? Why was he making it harder to keep the walls up?
But you couldn't afford to dwell on the warmth of his touch, nor the kindness in his gaze. The room felt smaller, suffocating now, as the weight of your mistake bore down on you. You had tripped, faltered—something they would undoubtedly notice. And in the Red Room, mistakes weren't just mistakes. They were crimes. Punishable ones.
Shit.
The realisation hit you like a punch to the gut, and it took every ounce of control not to let the panic show. You forced yourself to meet his eyes, but as you did, your gaze flickered past him—toward the cold, unblinking lens of the camera perched high on the wall. You knew it was watching. They were always watching.
He followed your line of sight, turning his head slightly. By the time his eyes returned to yours, you had schooled your expression into something harder, even as your heart hammered in your chest. The trembling breath you took gave you away, though, as you leaned closer and whispered, your voice barely audible, "Never let your guard down. Not here. No matter how untouchable you think you are, no one is immune to the hands of the Red Room. Not even you, Mr. Park."
His brows furrowed in confusion, but before he could respond, you tilted your head ever so slightly, drawing his attention to the camera again. That was when it hit him. The room wasn't just a stage—it was a cage. For you. For him. For both of you.
When his gaze returned to you, your words came softer but with an edge sharp enough to cut. "If you know what's good for you, you'll finish whatever business brought you here and leave. Today." Your voice wavered, but your warning was resolute. "Do yourself a favour. Go. Run while you still can. And forget."
The words cut through him, a dagger sinking deep into his chest. He stared at you, his throat tightening, the air around him thick and suffocating. He hated this—hated the helplessness, the way your truth wrapped around him like chains. The echoes of his past whispered cruelly in his mind: You can't save anyone, not without destroying them first.
After a long, agonising silence, he released you, his hands falling away slowly, reluctantly. The absence of his touch left you colder than you wanted to admit, but you forced yourself to push that feeling down, deep where it couldn't hurt you. This was for the best. It had to be.
He nodded, the motion stiff, his jaw tight. "You're right," he said finally, his voice strained, every word sounding like a defeat. "I'll go."
You offered him a sad, weary smile, one that didn't quite reach your eyes. "Good."
The weight of your final word lingered in the air between you. As if on cue, a firm knock on the door had you both stiffening, like deer caught in headlights. The door creaked open, revealing the founder's right-hand woman. "Gentleman Park, the Madame is ready to see you again," she announced, throwing you a sideways glance that sent chills down your spine.
It did the same to him. Rising to his feet, Seonghwa hesitated, casting one last glance in your direction. His eyes spoke volumes, but you knew there was nothing he could do. And then, with a quiet exhale, he turned and walked away. The door clicked shut behind him, and the silence that followed was deafening.
Your knees buckled, and you sank to the floor, the ache in your chest blossoming into something unbearable. You pressed a hand to your heart, willing the trembling to stop. But it didn't. It never did.
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The founder's voice was a symphony of mockery, laced with faux regret. "Oh dearie, I heard our star trainee did not perform too well. We deeply apologise for that, Gentleman Park," she said, her smile sharp and deliberate as she gestured to her aide. The woman stepped forward with a sleek black folder, placing it delicately on the polished mahogany table between them. "Rest assured, we will train her better. We do not tolerate such mistakes in the Red Room. Please know that through this alliance, we will only provide our best spies where needed. After all, one bad apple does not define an entire tree, now does it?"
Seonghwa's stomach churned at her words, the subtle cruelty wrapped in politeness. He straightened in his seat, his jaw tightening. "Not at all," he said quickly, shaking his head. "There's no need to apologise for that. She did—" he hesitated, swallowing down the knot in his throat, "—amazingly."
Madame Scarlet tilted her head, her smirk widening as if she found his words amusing. "That was hardly amazing," she countered, her voice silk laced with venom. "There's no need to be lenient on her behalf. She lost your attention early on and completely butchered her routine. A failure through and through." Her eyes glinted as she slid the folder closer to him, a pen perched on top. "But we appreciate your understanding. If all is well, the Red Room is happy to finally solidify this treaty with the Black Pirates."
His hand hovered over the pen, his fingers trembling as he picked it up. He tried to steady his grip, but the weight of her words bore down on him like a crushing tide. Look at what you've done, his mind hissed. Your hesitation, your distraction—it's your fault she'll suffer for this. She'll pay for your mistakes.
The pen hovered over the pristine paper, but his vision blurred as a storm of conflicting thoughts raged inside him. You need to leave, he reminded himself. That's the mercy you can give her. Don't make it any worse by staying.
The faces of his brothers flashed in his mind—waiting for him, relying on him. He couldn't jeopardise their safety over this. Caged birds like you existed everywhere, caught in a world of power and cruelty he couldn't fix. He had to let it go. This isn't your battle.
His resolve hardened as he straightened his back, forcing all thoughts of you from his mind. He tightened his grip on the pen, its barrel pressing against his fingers with an almost painful intensity. It would all be fine, he told himself. As long as he got out of here, far away from whatever nightmares took place in the Red Room, it wouldn't be his problem. None of it ever was. He exhaled shakily, lowering the pen to sign.
Then, a sudden, sharp thud jolted him from his thoughts.
He froze, turning toward the source of the sound. Through the decorative latticework of the lounge's window, he caught a glimpse of movement in the corridor beyond. His breath hitched as his eyes landed on you—stumbling, tears streaking your face, a trainer gripping the back of your neck like you were some unruly beast.
The trainer yanked you forward, her other hand poised in warning, but it wasn't the rough handling that made his chest tighten—it was the bruise blooming dark and vicious on the side of your face. Even from a distance, his sharp gaze caught the slight trembling of your legs, the way your breath hitched as you struggled not to cry out.
This is what "train her better" looks like, he realised, the Madame's earlier words reverberating cruelly in his head.
His heart clenched, a searing ache spreading through his chest as the sight of you being dragged away ignited something primal within him. The pen in his hand creaked under the force of his grip, nearly snapping in two. He closed his eyes briefly, drawing in a shaky breath to steady himself.
But he couldn't.
The image of you—broken, trembling, afraid—was etched into his mind, refusing to let go. Every instinct screamed at him to do something, to stop pretending he could walk away unscathed. The storm inside him threatened to break through, but he forced himself to bury it, replacing the turmoil with the practised mask of a Gentleman.
He set the pen down deliberately, the click of it against the table sharp in the heavy silence. "No," he murmured to himself, his voice barely audible.
Straightening in his seat, he lifted his head, a disarming smile curving his lips despite the turmoil beneath. "I agree, Madame," he said smoothly, his tone light and persuasive. "It would be our greatest honour to solidify this union. But where's the rush?"
The lady raised a sharp eyebrow. "Oh?"
"Do you reckon it would be alright for me to stay another day or two?" he continued, the words flowing effortlessly despite the storm within. "I believe it would be to our benefit to get to know one another better before taking such a significant step."
Her eyes flickered with intrigue at his sudden shift in tone. Her sharp smile widened, but it was the calculating glint in her eyes that unsettled him. "Hm, a Gentleman who values thoroughness. How admirable," she purred, leaning back in her chair as though savouring the upper hand she thought she held. "I see no harm in prolonging our discussions. After all, alliances built on patience tend to be the strongest, wouldn't you agree?"
Seonghwa nodded, though his throat felt dry, each word a bitter pill. "Absolutely."
Inside, his heart was a cacophony of regret and determination. The image of you, bruised and terrified, was burned into his mind. The sight of you being hauled away like some disposable object clawed at his resolve, unravelling all the arguments he'd carefully constructed to justify his departure. You can't save her, you fool, a voice whispered in his head, cold and unforgiving. You'll only make it worse. For her. For yourself. For everyone.
But another voice—quieter, trembling yet insistent—refused to be silenced. What if you can?
The Madame's voice cut through his thoughts like a blade. "Well then, Gentleman Park, consider yourself our guest of honour for another day... or two, if you'd like." She gestured to her aide, who deftly whisked away the unsigned contract. "We'll arrange better accommodations for you. Do let us know if there's anything you require during your stay."
His lips curved into a polite smile, though his stomach churned with unease. "Your hospitality is most appreciated."
The elderly woman inclined her head graciously, but there was no mistaking the glimmer of suspicion in her eyes. "It's always a pleasure to work with someone who values... thoroughness," she repeated, her words deliberate. She waved a hand dismissively. "You're free to explore as you please, though some areas remain restricted for your safety, of course."
Seonghwa bowed his head in acknowledgement and rose to his feet, his body moving automatically, though his mind was elsewhere. The moment he stepped out of the room, the air felt heavier. He couldn't shake the image of your trembling figure, the bruise on your face, the sheer hopelessness in your eyes.
He paused in the corridor, clenching his fists so tightly that his nails bit into his palms. Get it together, he told himself. One wrong move and you'll only get her killed.
But what was the alternative? Walking away while you endured unspeakable horrors? Letting his silence serve as complicity in your suffering? He felt as though he were drowning, the weight of his choices crushing him from all sides.
The sound of muffled cries pulled him from his thoughts. His head turned sharply in the direction they came from, his steps unsteady but driven by an undeniable force. He trailed the sound through the maze-like corridors, his heart pounding in his chest. His mind screamed at him to stop, to turn back before he did something reckless. But he couldn't. Not when the echoes of your pain were right there, slicing through the walls like jagged glass.
He rounded a corner and froze. Through a half-open door, he could see you kneeling on the floor, a trainer standing over you, barking orders. Her boot slammed into your ribs, and you crumpled further, a choked gasp escaping your lips. The sight hit him like a physical blow, and he felt the air leave his lungs.
He should leave. He should turn around, walk away, and pretend he'd seen nothing. That's what he'd been taught—to compartmentalise, to prioritise the bigger picture over fleeting emotions. But as he watched you struggle to breathe, watched you choke back sobs and force yourself to stand under the trainer's cruel gaze, something inside him snapped.
This wasn't about logic. It wasn't about alliances or gang politics. It wasn't even about you, not entirely. It was about what this place represented. The Red Room was a cesspool of power wielded without mercy, a machine that broke people and discarded the pieces. And you—you were a living reminder of everything he despised about this world, everything he'd tried to escape.
He turned on his heel, his jaw set, his movements deliberate. There was no time for hesitation. No time for second-guessing. If he was going to do this, he had to do it now, before his courage faltered. He made his way back to the lounge, his stride steady but his heart pounding.
Madame Scarlet raised an eyebrow as he re-entered the room. "Back so soon? I trust everything is—"
Fuck it.
"I have a request," Seonghwa interrupted, his voice calm but firm. He saw her brows lift in surprise, but he didn't give her a chance to speak. "I'd like to oversee her training."
The silence that followed was suffocating. Her expression shifted, her eyes narrowing with interest. "Her training?" she repeated, her tone laced with curiosity. "And why, pray tell, would a Gentleman of your standing wish to concern himself with such matters?"
He met her gaze, unwavering. "If this alliance is to succeed, I want to ensure that every asset provided is of the highest quality. She shows potential, but she needs refinement. Let me handle it." His lips curved into a disarming smile, one that masked the storm raging beneath the surface. "Consider it my contribution to strengthening this partnership."
The founder studied him for a long moment, her expression unreadable. Then, slowly, she leaned back in her chair, her smile returning. "Very well," she said, her voice dripping with amusement. "Let's see what Gentleman Park can do."
He inclined his head, hiding the relief that flooded through him. He had no plan, no clear idea of how to fix this. But for now, he'd bought you time. And he'd be damned if he let that time go to waste.
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"He's extending his stay... indefinitely?!" Wooyoung burst out, pushing his chair back with enough force to send it skidding against the floor. His voice, sharp with disbelief, rang through the meeting room. "What in the world is going on there?!"
Hongjoong sighed deeply, pressing his fingers against his temples as if willing away the tension. "That's what the messenger said. I don't—"
Mingi cut him off with a scoff, leaning back in his seat with arms crossed, his expression a storm of frustration and doubt. "First, it was a day. Then another. Now, who knows if Seonghwa hyung's ever coming back? What kind of lion's den did you send him into, huh?" He tilted his head, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "So much for being the 'best leader.'"
Jongho shot him a warning look and reached out as if to calm him, but the taller man pulled away, his resentment tangible.
The Captain's gaze turned icy, his composure hanging by a thread. "What exactly are you trying to insinuate, hm?" His tone was sharp, the growl in his voice betraying the pressure he was under. His mind was already a whirlwind of guilt and worry. First, his love was sent away, and now his closest brother was stranded in that infamous and dangerous training facility. What was keeping him there? Had the Red Room made unreasonable demands? Was the alliance at risk? Why hadn't he gone himself instead of sending Seonghwa? He should've been the one bearing the risk.
The Firestarter laughed bitterly, rising to his feet, his frustration reaching a boiling point. "What I'm saying is that you think everything's fine just because you were noble enough to send her away? Don't act like we haven't noticed you're still wasting our resources to keep tabs on her, to protect her from afar!" His voice was biting, the weight of his accusation filling the room.
Hongjoong stood as well, the anger in his chest clawing its way to the surface. "Watch your damn mouth, Song Mingi," he snapped, his voice low but dangerous.
Before either could escalate further, San slammed his fist on the table, the resounding thud silencing the brewing argument. "Will you two just stop already?!" His tone was sharp, cutting through the tension like a blade. "Is fighting about the same damn thing over and over going to bring Seonghwa hyung back? Will it help us figure out what's happening to him?"
His words hung in the air, and for a moment, no one spoke. The Tempest sighed, his frustration simmering beneath the surface. He hated this—hated how divided they'd become, the bond they once shared splintering under the weight of their choices. They used to be united, inseparable. Now, everything felt fractured, and the cracks were only growing. Didn't they see how short life was? How fragile their bond could become?
"Listen to me," San continued, his voice quieter now but steady with resolve. "I say we go after him."
The leader's jaw tightened. His instincts screamed at him to agree, but Yunho shook his head, breaking the silence. "Absolutely not," he said firmly. "We can't make a hasty move like that. What if it backfires? What if we put him in even more danger?"
Yeosang nodded, his voice calm but resolute. "Exactly. Have you all forgotten the code for danger? If Seonghwa hyung were truly in trouble, he would've used it. Whatever's happening, it doesn't seem like he's in immediate danger."
"Not yet, at least," the Anchor murmured, drawing everyone's attention. His voice was quiet, but the weight of his words settled heavily over the group. He opened his notebook, flipping through its pages until he found what he was looking for. "If we're serious about helping, we need to focus on crisis management. Let's map out every possible outcome and prepare contingency plans for all of them. We need to be ready for anything."
The room fell into a heavy silence as Jongho's words sank in.
Hongjoong exhaled slowly, the tension in his shoulders easing just slightly. He hated the idea of waiting, of being passive, but he knew the youngest was right. Losing his temper, indulging in Mingi's provocations—none of it would help their brother.
"That's the best course of action for now," he admitted, his tone quieter but steady. "Thank you, Jongho."
The team nodded in reluctant agreement, though unease lingered in the room. As they began strategising, one truth resonated in each of their hearts—no alliance was more important than Seonghwa. He was family, and they weren't about to let him go without a fight—even if it meant jeopardising the entire deal.
Forgive me, my brothers.
While the Gentleman shared their sentiment, something else weighed heavy in his mind as he strode through the shadowed halls of the Red Room, every step measured, deliberate. His brothers—his family—would never understand this choice, this betrayal of their trust. But they weren't here. They hadn't seen what he'd seen, hadn't felt the cold weight of torment that clawed at his insides. For now, he had to shut them out. He had to focus.
Stopping just outside the door where he had last seen you, the memory of your broken form flashed like a burn mark across his mind. He straightened his shoulders, setting his expression into a mask of indifference—a carefully crafted lie. The trainer inside sensed him immediately, turning to meet his gaze. Her eyes, calculating and hard, met his as though he were an accomplice rather than an outsider. Seonghwa offered a curt nod, polite but distant, and received the same in return.
His gaze flickered to you, and time seemed to stretch thin for a moment.
There you were—collapsed on the cold floor like a discarded doll. Your body was unnaturally still, save for the faint tremble in your fingertips and the shudder of your uneven breaths. Whatever they'd done to you had left you completely drained, your small frame appearing even more fragile than before.
The trainer crouched beside you, the scrape of her boots against the floor grating against his ears like nails on stone. The gang member remained rooted to the doorway, his body rigid, his expression unreadable as she reached out to you, fingers threading mockingly through your tangled hair.
"Look at you," she sneered, tucking a strand behind your ear with a gentleness so condescending it twisted something sharp in his gut. Her hand shifted, suddenly locking around your jaw with enough force to make you flinch and whimper. "This should teach you. The Madame has high hopes for you, little one. Stop disappointing her like this, will you?"
Your red-rimmed eyes rose weakly, glazed and unfocused, but you managed the smallest nod, your breath stuttering painfully in your chest.
It wasn't enough.
Her grip tightened cruelly, claws pressing into the soft skin of your cheeks until you whimpered again, the sound soft but devastating. "Answer me," she demanded, her tone low and icy.
"Y-yes, ma'am," you choked out, the words barely more than a whisper.
Satisfied, she released you, and you slumped forward like a puppet whose strings had been cut.
Seonghwa's fists curled tight at his sides, his knuckles white from the pressure. Every muscle in his body screamed to move, to tear her away from you, but he forced himself to remain still. The mask didn't crack—not yet. When the trainer finally turned her gaze to him, he managed to shift, allowing a smug, composed smile to play on his lips as though none of it mattered to him.
"You've worked hard, comrade," he said smoothly, his voice calm and polite. "Let me handle the rest."
The trainer smirked, standing to dust off her hands as though your pain had tainted her. "How kind of you, Gentleman Park," she cooed, her mockery like acid on his ears. "Very well, then."
With one last unsettling grin, she turned on her heel and marched off, her boots echoing ominously down the hall until she disappeared.
The silence she left behind was suffocating.
He remained still, standing by the door, though his chest burned with the need to move—to act. He was cautious, his sharp mind reminding him of the cameras lurking in unseen corners. He couldn't afford to rush to your side, not yet. Any show of care, any crack in his facade, would confirm their suspicions. They had eyes everywhere.
He forced himself to stay rooted in place, his gaze lingering on you as you stirred faintly. Slowly, painstakingly, you began to force yourself upright. Seonghwa's heart twisted at the sight of your trembling hands and the way your body shook with every small movement. It was as though each muscle screamed in protest, but still, you pushed forward. The sheer determination etched into you was unlike anything he'd seen. You weren't just enduring—you were surviving.
Blinded by pain, you didn't notice him.
Your silent tears fell unchecked, and you hugged your bruised arms to yourself as you limped toward the exit, your steps slow and agonising. Every inch you covered showed your strength, but it also burned an ache deep in his chest. You shouldn't have to fight this hard just to move.
Finally, you reached him. Your head was still lowered, so at first, you only saw his shoes. You froze, your breath hitching sharply. Slowly, your wide, tear-streaked eyes lifted, and when you registered him standing there, shock overtook your features.
Your legs wavered, weakened beyond their limit, and you began to fall forward.
That was it. Seonghwa moved without thought, his body acting on pure instinct as he lunged to catch you before you hit the ground. His arms came around you securely, holding you steady. You gasped softly, fresh tears clouding your eyes as you struggled weakly to push yourself away from him.
"Stop it," he murmured, his voice low but steady, as he bent to scoop you into his arms. "You're hurt enough as it is."
The fight left you at his words, and you slumped against him, the side of your forehead pressing tiredly against his cheek.
"You goddamned idiot," you whispered brokenly, your voice trembling as quiet sobs escaped you. "I told you to go. You're going to get yourself killed…"
Your words hit him like stones, each one carrying the weight of your desperation and anger. You hated him for this—for being so stubborn, so damn stupid. And yet, there he was, carrying you like you weren't a burden at all.
You hated him for giving you hope. Hope that maybe the world wasn't entirely cruel. Hope that not all humans are monsters. Hope that maybe, someday, you'll get to escape this hell.
He didn't speak, but his hold on you tightened just a fraction as he carried you toward your room—the place they'd told him was yours at least. In that moment, nothing else mattered. Not the Red Room, not the cameras, not the precarious alliance.
All that mattered was you.
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Seonghwa tightened his hold on you as he carried you through the cold, labyrinthine corridors of the facility, the weight of your frail body pressing against his chest. Every step he took was deliberate, his movements careful to avoid jolting you any further. He didn't speak, the silence filled only by your shallow, uneven breaths and the faint sound of his boots against the hard floor.
Somewhere along the way, he felt you soften in his arms. The tension in your body—a tension he imagined had been present since you first stepped foot in this hellish place—began to ease. Your head nestled into the crook of his neck, and your arms, though weak, clung lightly to him as if afraid he might disappear.
Then, your breathing evened out, soft and rhythmic, and he realised with a pang in his chest that you had drifted into sleep. He couldn't explain the mix of emotions that overcame him. Relief? Guilt? Fury? That here, in this wretched place, in the aftermath of torment, his presence could bring you enough comfort to let down your guard. It shouldn't be like this. You shouldn't have had to fight so hard just to feel the smallest sliver of peace.
You, meanwhile, were lost in the strange sanctuary of his embrace. For the first time in what felt like a lifetime, the gnawing sense of danger and fear slipped away. You couldn't understand why—what it was about him that allowed you to let go—but it was undeniable. The warmth of his body, the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat, the steady strength of his arms around you—it was unlike anything you had felt since the days when life was simpler, kinder.
Your mind wandered back to those days. College. Classes. Part-time jobs. A life that was chaotic in its own right but filled with a kind of normalcy you now yearned for. You missed that life, the one where being tired meant something as mundane as staying up late to study or pulling extra shifts. Not this. Not exhaustion born from fear, pain, and endless suffering. You wished, futilely, that all of this was some terrible nightmare you could wake from.
But it wasn't.
As if your subconscious sensed the reality of your surroundings, your eyes shot open, your body jerking in reflex. A cry of pain escaped your lips as fire shot through your nerves, the abrupt movement too much for your battered body.
"Whoa, hey, it's okay," came a deep, familiar voice, steady and calming. Gentle hands pressed against your shoulders, guiding you to lie back down. "Don't push yourself."
Your gaze darted toward him, and the memories came rushing back. Park. The Red Room. The training. The punishment. It all settled over you like a heavy fog, suffocating and undeniable.
Blinking against the dimness, you squinted at your surroundings. The room was unfamiliar. Plain walls, a bed—a proper bed—and a small desk. Your breath hitched in disbelief.
"Wh-where the hell am I?" you croaked, your throat raw.
Seonghwa frowned, his expression confused but soft. "It's your room, is it not?" he replied, his tone gentle, almost questioning.
You let out a humourless laugh, shaking your head weakly. "My room?" you repeated, incredulity lacing your words. "People like me don't get rooms."
Your voice was a whisper now, bitter and hollow. "They lied to you."
The implication of your words made his chest tighten painfully. His mind raced with the possibilities, each one worse than the last. Where have you been sleeping? On the floor of some cold cell? In a corner, chained, left to fend off the darkness alone?
He didn't ask. He couldn't. Not yet.
Instead, he looked at you, his jaw tightening as he swallowed back the anger boiling within him. You didn't need his rage right now—you needed his steadiness.
"I'll make sure they don't lie to me again," he said quietly, a promise woven into his words. He reached for the blanket at the edge of the bed and gently draped it over you. "For now, just rest. You're safe."
Safe? Here...?
You sighed, shaking your head. "I don't think that's something within your control, Mr. Park. Clearly, they're deceiving you for a good reason. If you know what's best for your own safety, you'd go along with their every wish and leave this place at your first chance."
Your eyes burned with tears forming in frustration, but you were too drained to argue, muttering weakly again, "Why... God, why are you even still here? You're insane..." You trailed off, the blanket's warmth and the bed's softness—luxuries you hadn't known in so long—lulling you into an uneasy but welcome stillness.
Perhaps you were right. Perhaps he really was insane for this. But Seonghwa knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that if he walked away today and left you behind, he would never be able to live another moment in peace.
As he sat by your bedside, his dark eyes lingered on your face, the faint lines of pain etched into your features even in sleep. He couldn't stop the rush of emotions building within him—a storm of guilt, admiration, and something else he couldn't quite name.
Your earlier words echoed in his mind. "Why are you even still here? You're insane..." Even in your weakened state, you had been more concerned for his safety than your own. How was it possible for someone who had suffered so deeply, endured such unspeakable cruelty, to still care for someone else? For him, a stranger who had inadvertently become the reason for your suffering.
His chest tightened painfully as he thought back to the chain of events that had led to this moment. If he hadn't pushed so hard for answers, if he hadn't drawn their attention to you...
I'm so sorry. You suffered all because of me.
His jaw clenched. It wasn't your fault. None of this was. You had simply been caught in the crossfire of forces far beyond your control. And yet, you bore the weight of it with a quiet resilience that humbled him.
If only he knew the truth—how your unyielding empathy had been the very trait that had landed you in this nightmare. The kindness that allowed you to care for others, even at the cost of your own well-being, had marked you as a failure in their eyes. To them, your compassion was a flaw to be eradicated, not celebrated. If their experiments had succeeded, if they had stripped you of every last shred of emotion, perhaps you wouldn't have to feel any of this now. Perhaps it would have been mercy.
But mercy wasn't what they had given you.
Seonghwa exhaled shakily, forcing himself to focus on the present. His gaze dropped to the small bundle he had brought with him—an emergency kit he'd tucked into his coat before leaving his quarters. Pulling out the small jar of ointment, he opened it carefully, its sharp medicinal scent filling the air.
This seemed as good a time as any to use it.
He dipped his fingers into the ointment, its cool texture spreading easily against his skin. His movements were slow and deliberate as he leaned closer to you, his free hand brushing your hair aside to get a clearer view of your wounds. You stirred slightly under his touch, but he froze, waiting until your breathing evened out again before continuing.
As he worked, the Gentleman couldn't help but notice the scars that marred your skin, each one a painful testament to what you had endured. His hands hovered over the worst of them, as if hesitant to touch. But he pressed on, spreading the ointment with a feather-light touch, determined not to wake you.
The faint lines of pain on your face seemed to soften as the salve worked its magic, and he found himself watching you again. Not just your wounds, but you—the curve of your cheek, the faint flutter of your lashes, the subtle rise and fall of your chest. He wondered how someone who had been through so much could still carry this quiet strength, this humanity that he wasn't sure he would have been capable of holding onto if he were in your position.
Something shifted in him then, something he couldn't quite name. It wasn't just guilt or admiration anymore—it was something deeper, something that unsettled him even as it stirred a strange sense of purpose within him.
"You shouldn't have to feel this," he murmured softly, the words meant more for himself than for you. "None of this."
His hands paused briefly, trembling as the weight of his emotions threatened to spill over. But he steadied himself and resumed his task, meticulously tending to your wounds until every last one had been treated.
When he finally sat back, exhaustion tugging at his own body, he couldn't bring himself to leave your side. Instead, he stayed there, his gaze never straying far from you.
Seonghwa had made many promises to himself over the years, but as he watched over you in the dim light of the room, he made one more—a silent vow that whatever it took, he would find a way to free you from this nightmare. Even if it cost him everything.
I won't leave you behind... not this time.
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The next morning unfolded in a fog of tension and fleeting memories that lingered in his mind as he sat across from Madame Scarlet. The dining room, grand and dripping with opulence, felt more like a gilded cage than a place of comfort. The soft clink of silverware and the hum of hushed conversation grated against his nerves, the air heavy with artifice. His grip on his utensils tightened as your words echoed in his thoughts, each syllable etched with quiet despair.
"It's not as simple as you think, Mr. Park. There's more to this place than merely spy training. They have more... elaborate plans. And I'm... part of that plan."
Your voice had wavered, the fear laced within it unmistakable. He could still see the way your eyes darted to the door, your movements taut with the paranoia of someone constantly monitored. Your unfinished confession repeated itself in his head like a haunting refrain.
"I'm not just a regular trainee here... I'm—"
The memory was interrupted by the sharp sound of boots in the hallway, the rhythmic echo cutting through the tension like a blade. Your voice had faltered, replaced by a gasp as the footsteps grew louder. And then she had entered—the woman you called your trainer. Her expression was stern, impassive, as she spared Seonghwa a curt nod before dragging you away without explanation. The sight of you, so resigned yet terrified, had left a bitter taste in his mouth.
Before he could so much as process what had happened, another figure had arrived, the right-hand woman, beckoning him to breakfast as though nothing had transpired.
And now, here he was, a mask of calculated charm concealing the storm within as he faced the Madame. The founder, draped in her cold authority, watched him with an unsettling smile, her words poised and deliberate.
"So, you find our ways effective?" she asked, her voice dripping with saccharine diplomacy. "I knew we could trust decisive men such as yourself from the Black Pirates to agree with our methods."
Her praise felt like poison, each word curdling in his gut. Seonghwa forced a smile, swallowing his revulsion with practised ease.
"Of course, Madame," he replied smoothly, his voice betraying none of the turmoil beneath. "It is only necessary. After all, the best diamonds are produced in the rough."
Her approving nod was like ice slipping down his spine. As she turned her attention to the next topic, his thoughts drifted back to you, unable to ignore the gnawing questions.
What were you going to say? If you're not just another trainee, then what are you? What twisted plans are they weaving around you?
He pictured you before this nightmare—living a life untouched by the horrors of this place. Perhaps you had once been a girl who laughed freely, who dreamed without fear. The thought felt like a knife twisting in his chest.
What are they doing to you now? What are they turning you into?
"Gentleman Park?" Madame Scarlet's voice cut through his spiralling thoughts, sharp and expectant. He blinked, his façade unbroken as he nodded and delivered a fabricated report of your supposed punishment. Each lie tasted bitter, but he forced it down.
I'll find out. Whatever it takes.
Deep under the building, the isolation chamber felt alive, its oppressive darkness wrapping around you like a suffocating shroud. The relentless hum of machinery echoed in your ears, each vibration a cruel reminder of your imprisonment. Your body trembled, exhaustion weighing heavily on your limbs, but it was nothing compared to the weight of your thoughts. Then came that voice, cold and devoid of humanity, slicing through the silence.
"How do you feel?"
Your fists clenched, nails digging into your palms as a spark of anger flickered to life. "Nothing," you bit out, your voice shaking with frustration. But even as you said it, the word felt hollow, a lie you couldn't quite believe. You didn't feel nothing—no, it was anger, sharp and scorching, that had taken root inside you. Frustration flared hotter with every second, fed by the memory of Seonghwa's words, echoing in your mind like a cruel whisper.
"I'll be here to stay... indefinitely now."
You had stared at him, disbelief coursing through you like a tidal wave. "Wh-what do you mean indefinitely?" you had asked, your voice unsteady, heart pounding with the weight of implications you couldn't yet comprehend.
He hadn't looked at you, his gaze fixed on the jar of ointment in his hands. You hadn't noticed it then, but now, in the suffocating dark, the memory of his careful hands tending to your wounds replayed with an unexpected tenderness. The way his fingers had moved—gentle, deliberate—like someone who cared. His voice, soft and almost hesitant, echoed in your mind.
"I... proposed to oversee your training."
You had blinked at him, confusion and frustration crashing together in a storm of emotions. "What...? Why? Whatever for?" you had demanded, searching his face for answers.
And then his eyes met yours. Determination burned there, fierce and unyielding. It caught you off guard, stole the breath from your lungs. "I'm going to help you," he said, his voice steady, as though the very idea of failure didn't exist.
The memory of his words ignited a whirlwind in your chest—anger, disbelief, and something else you weren't ready to name. Help me? The thought had made you scoff, a bitter laugh escaping before the tears threatened to follow. You had shaken your head at him, the hopelessness in your heart spilling out like poison.
"You don't even know what's happening here—hell, you don't even know me. Why would you risk everything for someone like me? You can't save me from something you don't understand. And they... they'll never let you find out."
You remembered the crack in your voice as you pointed to yourself, desperation seeping into every word. "This... this isn't something you can fix, Mr. Park."
The robotic voice snapped you back to reality, the chamber's suffocating atmosphere closing in again. "Subject 01, how do you feel?"
You bit your lip hard enough to draw blood, trying to steady your breathing. You needed to focus on something, anything, to keep the darkness at bay. And there he was again in your mind, that damned determination lighting up his face. His words refused to let go of you.
"Well, they don't have to let me. I'll find out myself, one way or another. And besides..."
You could see it so clearly—the way he smiled at you then, soft and genuine, so different from the carefully constructed smiles he wore for everyone else. It wasn't fair, the way it disarmed you, the way it stirred something you didn't want to feel.
"I have you."
Tears pricked at your eyes again, but this time they weren't born of despair. They carried something heavier, something far more dangerous. Hope. And you hated him for it—for giving you something to hold onto when you had spent so long letting go.
The voice interrupted again, clinical and uncaring. "Subject 01—"
Your eyes flew open, defiance blazing in them as you glared into the black void where you knew the camera was. "Nothing at all," you said, your voice steady, though the fire within you burned hotter than ever.
"Wonderful," the voice responded, its detachment grating against every nerve.
But for the first time, you didn't care. Your focus was sharp, your resolve harder than steel. You would convince him to leave, to abandon this reckless idea before it consumed him too.
And yet... a part of you wanted him to stay.
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The week crawled by in a haze of calculated cruelty and simmering defiance. With Madame Scarlet's permission, Seonghwa was now a near-constant presence in your training sessions, his sharp eyes watching from the shadows or perched casually at the edge of the room. Most of your sessions, anyway. The ones he was allowed to witness.
The others—those sessions—took place far away from his sight, shrouded in secrecy and hidden deep within the facility's labyrinthine corridors. Those sessions were the ones that drained the light from your eyes and left you stumbling back to your dormitory, wearier and more hollow than before. And each time, he noticed.
Though the trainers and the founder kept him occupied with mealtime conversations or endless discussions about "enhancements" to your regimen, he saw it. He saw the shadows under your eyes deepen. He saw the tremor in your hands as you reached for water. He saw the stiffness in your movements, as though your body were fighting a losing battle with pain.
It enraged him, but he hid it well. He always hid it well. Instead of letting his anger show, he catalogued each new bruise and each broken look. He filed it away as fuel for his determination.
Today was no different. Another training session, another round of impossible tasks. The founder herself was present, her sharp gaze piercing through the room like a predator sizing up prey. She pushed you harder than ever, setting you up for failure with tasks that even the strongest would falter under.
"Faster," she barked as you stumbled mid-sprint. "You call that speed? A child could outrun you."
The other trainees averted their eyes, some wincing at the venom in her tone. But you kept going, jaw tight, pushing your battered body to obey despite its protests.
When you managed to finish the drill, she sneered. "Pathetic. And here I thought we were cultivating something special."
Seonghwa, standing to the side with his arms crossed, broke the silence. His voice was calm but firm, cutting through the tension like a blade. "I've seen worse recover faster. She's more resilient than you think, Madame."
The founder turned her sharp eyes on him, her expression unreadable. "Resilience isn't enough, Gentleman Park. What we need here is excellence."
"Excellence takes time," he replied smoothly, his face a mask of polite detachment. "And she's proven capable of rising to challenges when given the opportunity."
His words deflected her attention just enough to ease the pressure on you. And you hated it.
You hated the way he intervened, hated the risks he was taking by challenging the founder—no matter how subtle. It was reckless. It was dangerous. And it was entirely unnecessary.
When the session finally ended, you didn't linger. You stormed out of the training hall, your body aching and your mind racing. But as you turned the corner into the hallway, there he was. He leaned casually against the wall, waiting for you with an unreadable expression.
Your anger boiled over. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" you hissed, marching up to him. "You don't need to make my battles yours!"
His calm demeanour didn't waver. He straightened, meeting your glare head-on. "I'm not trying to fight your battles."
"Then what the hell was that back there?" you snapped, gesturing wildly toward the training hall. "Do you have any idea what you're risking? Why do you keep—"
"I'm just trying to make sure you live to fight them," he interrupted, his voice low but steady.
The words hit you like a punch to the gut. Your breath hitched, the anger in your chest faltering as something else crept in.
His gaze softened just slightly, but the determination remained. "You don't have to like me being here. Hell, you can hate me for it. But if I can take even one ounce of that weight off your shoulders, then it's worth it."
Your fists clenched at your sides, words caught in your throat. You didn't know what to say. You didn't want to believe him, didn't want to let that flicker of hope take root again.
But damn him, he made it so hard.
You're being stupid, Park. You'll regret this.
Later that night, the training room was cloaked in dim light, the overhead bulbs casting fractured shadows across the walls like shards of glass. It was late, long past curfew, but the ache in your chest and the founder's voice echoing in your mind wouldn't let you rest. The sting of humiliation lingered like a wound left raw, and you poured it all into the combat routine—every sharp strike and block an attempt to claw your way free from the weight crushing you.
But your body betrayed you, trembling under the strain of endless days without reprieve. Exhaustion blurred the edges of your movements, and frustration burned hotter with every imperfect step.
The quiet sound of a door opening went unnoticed until a voice sliced through the haze, steady and low.
"Your form's a little off."
You spun around, fists raised on instinct, only to find Seonghwa leaning against the doorframe, his presence unassuming yet commanding. His gaze lingered on you, calm but observant, and it unsettled you in ways you couldn't name.
"What are you doing here?" you snapped, wiping sweat from your brow, your voice sharper than you intended.
He stepped closer, each movement deliberate but unthreatening. "Couldn't sleep," he said simply, his tone betraying no judgement. "Figured I wasn't the only one."
Your glare hardened, walls snapping into place like armour. "I don't need you here. Go back to your room."
Instead of retreating, he crossed the room with measured steps, his eyes flicking over your stance. "You're letting frustration get the better of you. It's making you sloppy."
His words struck a nerve, cutting deeper than they should have. "I don't need your help," you bit out.
"I'm not offering help," he countered, his calm tone steady as steel. "Just advice."
Before you could fire back, he gestured to the training mat. "Show me what you're working on."
For a moment, you hesitated. Letting him see you like this—raw, vulnerable, struggling—felt like exposing a wound to someone who could twist the knife. But there was no mockery in his gaze, no condescension. Just an infuriating patience that chipped away at your defences.
Reluctantly, you demonstrated the routine, your movements sharp but uneven. He watched silently, his brow furrowed with concentration, and when you finished, he stepped closer.
"Your footing's off here," he said, nudging your leg into position with his foot, the warmth of his touch seeping through the fabric. "And your weight—it's leaving you open to counters."
You flinched at the proximity, but he didn't retreat. Instead, he adjusted your arm with a careful, steady hand. "Try it again."
This time, your movements flowed with more control, more precision. When you stopped, he nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Better. But there's still something missing."
"What?" The word slipped out before you could stop it.
He stepped behind you, his hands hovering just above your arms, his voice a quiet murmur. "You're too rigid. Combat isn't just about strength—it's about flow. Anticipation. Trusting yourself."
His closeness was overwhelming, the heat of his presence and the steadiness of his breathing weaving into the moment. His hands guided your movements, the gentleness of his touch unravelling something tightly wound inside you.
The routine transformed, no longer a drill but a dance. Each motion flowed seamlessly into the next, and for the first time, you felt a sense of grace beneath the weight of your exhaustion.
"You're stronger than they'll ever give you credit for," he murmured, his voice soft, like a secret meant only for you.
And just as the moment began to settle, he stepped away, leaving a hollow space where his presence had been. You stood there, breathless and unmoored, the room suddenly colder without him near.
He turned to leave, his steps quiet, but something within you resisted. Before you could think better of it, you called out, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Mr. Park... thank you."
He paused, glancing over his shoulder, his expression unreadable.
"Seonghwa," he corrected, his smile faint but disarming. "Just... call me Seonghwa. And you're welcome, my lady."
And then he was gone, leaving you alone in the stillness, your thoughts tangled and your heart betraying you in ways you hadn't thought possible.
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"Message from Seonghwa hyung."
Jongho's voice cut through the suffocating silence of the Captain's office, and Hongjoong's head shot up from his hands immediately. The younger man stepped forward, closing the door firmly behind him before placing a neatly wrapped package on the desk.
"He sent this through the secret messenger," the youngest continued, his tone laced with urgency.
The leader's stomach churned. That alone spoke volumes. Seonghwa wouldn't have risked using such a method unless it was vital. His hands trembled as he tugged at the twine, unwrapping the package with uncharacteristic clumsiness.
"A secret messenger…" he muttered under his breath. "If the Red Room finds out—"
"They won't," Jongho interjected firmly. "He knows what he's doing. But you need to see this, hyung. It's important."
The package fell open, its contents spilling across the desk in a disorganised heap: photographs, documents, and a few unmarked videotapes. Hongjoong froze, his unease morphing into dread. With a sharp nod toward the small TV in the corner, he gestured for the Anchor to play the first tape.
As the screen flickered to life, a chilling silence settled over the room.
The grainy footage revealed sterile white rooms filled with cold, metallic equipment. A girl restrained on a table. Her eyes, wide with terror or dulled by sedation, seemed to pierce through the screen. The audio crackled with muffled voices—clinical orders interspersed with the occasional scream.
"What the fuck…" Hongjoong whispered, his knuckles whitening as he gripped the desk.
Jongho's face remained impassive, though his jaw was set tight. The footage shifted, showing a stark, windowless chamber—a single chair in the centre equipped with electroshock restraints. The same girl. The same hopelessness.
"This isn't just training," the youngest said, his voice thick with disgust. "This is something else entirely."
The Captain's fingers sifted through the documents spread before him: test results, progress notes, and schematics outlining the chilling details of the experiments.
"They're not just training spies," he murmured, his voice hollow. "They're manufacturing weapons. Breaking people down and rebuilding them into... into something inhuman."
His hand faltered as he reached the bottom of the stack. A profile sheet caught his eye, its clipped photograph grainy but unmistakable.
A lab rat.
No—a person.
His stomach dropped as he scanned the page. The subject's identity was stripped away, replaced with a mere clinical description:
Female. Mid-twenties. High pain tolerance. Physical capabilities surpass expectations.
Jongho broke the silence, his voice grim. "They're trying to turn her into a machine. Stripping away everything that makes her human."
"And Seonghwa..." Hongjoong's voice cracked, the weight of it crashing down on him. His eyes caught the scrawled words on the package's exterior:
Project Android by the Red Room.
A cold shiver ran down his spine. The eldest wasn't there for diplomacy anymore. He was trapped in the epicentre of something far darker than they'd ever anticipated.
The leader slammed the final page onto the desk, his gaze locking onto a message scribbled in their coded language:
"Keep this evidence safe. I'll work on getting her out while securing this deal. I'll use the code if I need help. For now, have faith in me. Sorry for letting you down, Joong."
His jaw tightened, his gaze snapping to the Anchor. "We need to come up with a backup plan. If things go south for him—"
Jongho nodded sharply. "And the girl?"
For a moment, Hongjoong faltered. The weight of it all—the impossibility of what they were up against—threatened to break through his composure. But then his resolve returned, hardened like steel.
"We don't leave anyone behind," he said firmly, his voice steady despite the tremor in his hands. "Not if we can help it."
He leaned back in his chair, his mind already racing through contingencies. Sure, the Black Pirates weren't exactly saints, but even they had their limits.
And this?
This crossed every single one of them.
Back at the Red Room, Seonghwa could only hope his package had reached its destination safely. It was the sliver of hope keeping him tethered amidst the suffocating tension that defined this place. What you didn't know—what no one knew—was how far his determination had driven him. Every moment he wasn't with you or under the watchful eye of Madame Scarlet and her loyal hounds, he was spying. Not because he trusted the system but because he trusted himself more.
He knew he couldn't endure this oppressive environment much longer, and he refused to leave without you. So, he worked tirelessly. Nights passed with little sleep as he used his sharp senses and meticulous skills to catalogue every camera, memorise the labyrinth of hallways, and navigate spaces no one else dared to. His stealth was unmatched, a testament to his experience. At times, he found it bitterly ironic—this was a spy training facility, yet he roamed freely, undetected, a shadow in a house of shadows.
He'd known for some time now what you were to this place. He knew the pain you carried, the torment hidden behind the veneer of precision and obedience. But he hadn't found the courage to confront you about it, not until tonight.
Like many other nights, he found you awake past curfew. Tonight, you were in the ballet practice room—the same room that had led to your punishment, all because of him. This time, you finished your routine with precision, each movement a testament to your perseverance. When you stopped, his soft applause startled you, but only for a moment. By now, his late-night appearances had become so common you no longer questioned them.
And yet, you feared the comfort they brought you. Comfort felt dangerous here.
You sighed, turning away as the corners of your heart warmed against your will. "Can't sleep again, Mr. Park?" you asked, your tone guarded but laced with weariness.
He clicked his tongue in mock annoyance as he sat beside you, just far enough to respect your boundaries but close enough for you to feel the warmth of his presence. "Told you to call me Seongh—"
"Mr. Park," you cut him off, sharp but not unkind. Your eyes met his in warning, firm enough to halt his words.
He sighed in surrender, leaning back against the mirror beside you. The room fell into an uneasy silence, the tension between you as palpable as the moonlight streaming through the tall windows.
You broke the quiet, your voice hesitant but unwavering. "Why..." The single word hung in the air, weighted with the unspoken questions you hadn't dared to voice until now. "Why are you still here? Be honest with me. You're Gentleman Park—a feared member of the Black Pirates. Mercy isn't exactly your calling card. And yet, you're here. Risking everything. For what?"
His lips curved into a bittersweet smile, his eyes unfocused as if staring at a memory only he could see. For a moment, you thought he wouldn't answer. Then, in a voice as soft as the moonlight, he began.
"I once tried to save someone like you," he said, the weight of his confession pressing against the fragile quiet of the room.
"When I was young, before the Black Pirates, I wanted to make a difference. Believe it or not, I was studying to join the police force, still naive enough to think I could change the world." His voice carried a bitterness that made your chest tighten. "One day, I met a boy begging on the streets. He looked so lost, so scared. I found out he was trapped in a human trafficking ring. I thought I was saving him when I helped him escape."
You watched as his expression hardened, his jaw clenching against the flood of memories.
"For a little while, I thought I'd done it. I believed I'd saved him. But those bastards retaliated. They found him again. And they punished him." His fists curled tightly in his lap. "What they did to him… It was worse than anything he'd suffered before. And he didn't survive."
Your breath caught at the raw anguish in his voice.
"I thought I was his hero, but I was the reason he suffered more. After that, I joined the gang and stopped trying to save people. I told myself the world didn't need heroes—it needed survivors." He looked at you then, his gaze piercing but soft. "And then I saw you. At first, I thought I'd learned my lesson. That getting involved would only make things worse. But—"
"Your first instinct was right," you interrupted, your voice calm but resolute. "You should've left me behind."
Seonghwa flinched, your words slicing through him. "You don't mean that," he said softly, almost a plea.
"Don't I?" You turned to face him fully, your eyes sharp but heavy with exhaustion. "You think I don't know what I am to them? What I am to this place? My life is already ruined. But you… Look at what you've dragged yourself into because of me."
The words hung in the air, a thick, suffocating silence settling between you. If you thought your harshness would drive him away, you were wrong. For, instead of retreating, something inside him warmed, a flicker of hope igniting in your pain. You weren't angry at him for making your life worse. You were still thinking of him. You were still asking him to leave, to protect himself. And that thought alone was enough to keep him from walking away.
"No," he said at last, his voice steady, more resolute than you'd ever heard it before. "My first instinct was wrong. The old me wasn't strong enough to protect the people I cared about. But now, I won't make the same mistake. This time, I'll protect you. No matter what it takes."
People he… cared about? Me?
The weight of his words hit you like a freight train. For a moment, you were speechless, the walls around your heart trembling under the sheer force of his unwavering conviction. He wasn't just speaking to you; he was believing in you. And for the first time, a small, fragile seed of hope took root inside you. Maybe, just maybe, he was someone you could trust. Someone you could believe in.
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"Quick, in here!" Seonghwa whispered urgently, pulling you into the narrow closet in the corner of the ballet practice room. The door shut softly behind you, his hand lingering on your wrist to steady your trembling form. You were both about to leave for the night when the unmistakable echo of footsteps down the hall froze you in your tracks. Instinct took over as you tugged him toward the nearest hiding spot—the changing room.
The space was suffocatingly cramped, every breath shared between you as you tried to steady your racing heart. The faint rise and fall of his chest told you his was no calmer. Only a sliver of moonlight seeped through the slats of the door, illuminating the tension that now filled the air.
You swallowed hard, throat dry as you became painfully aware of how close he was. Barely an inch separated you, his broad chest right there, the faint, intoxicating scent of leather and spice curling around you. When your eyes met his, they held a storm of unspoken emotions. Another inch closer, and your lips might have touched. The thought made your breath hitch, but the sound of approaching footsteps snapped you back to the danger at hand.
The two of you froze—not from the proximity this time, but the unmistakable panic that crept in as the footsteps entered the room.
Turning away from him, you leaned forward slightly to peek through the slats in the door. As you shifted, your hair moved, revealing the nape of your neck. In the dim light, Seonghwa caught sight of something he hadn't seen before—seared into your skin was a barcode. Below it, the words: Subject 01.
He stiffened behind you, and though the footsteps eventually faded, it wasn't until silence filled the room again that you dared to exhale.
"She's gone," you whispered, relaxing slightly as you turned back to him. You reached for the door, but his grip on your arm stopped you.
"Did it hurt?" His voice was soft, almost tender, but the barely concealed edge betrayed the anger simmering beneath the surface.
"Did what hurt?" you asked, frowning. Then his gaze dropped to the back of your neck, his fingers brushing the spot lightly, almost reverently. The touch sent a shiver down your spine. Realisation hit you like a wave. He'd seen it.
The gasp that left your lips was involuntary as you instinctively stepped back, but his hold on you was firm, steady, as though he feared you might crumble under his touch.
"It's okay," he murmured, his tone calm despite the fire in his eyes. "I know. I know everything—what they've done to you, what they plan to do. I know that you're... Subject 01 of Project Android."
His words sent a chill down your spine. The strength drained from your legs, and you would have fallen if not for his steady arm supporting you. "H-how…? They'd never—" you stammered, your voice barely a whisper.
He sighed deeply, leaning forward until his forehead rested gently against yours. His breath was warm, grounding, even as your mind spun in chaos. "Like you said," he muttered, his voice laced with a hint of bitter irony, "I'm Gentleman Park of the Black Pirates. There's nothing I can't uncover when I put my mind to it."
Your hands balled into fists against his jacket, your voice trembling with anger and despair. "So you knew?" you asked, incredulous. "And you stayed? Do you have any idea what these people are capable of? You should've signed that contract and left. There's nothing you can do for me. Like you said, doomed souls are everywhere. I'm just another one."
Your eyes narrowed, challenging him. "Why are you even here? Why are you working so hard for me? It's not because of me, is it? It's because this experiment poses a threat to your crew. If Project Android succeeds, it'll be a threat to the Black Pirates too, won't it? That's the real reason—"
"Stop." His jaw tightened, and for a moment, you thought he wouldn't answer. Then his expression softened, his eyes meeting yours with a raw, unfiltered vulnerability you hadn't expected. "You silly girl," he said, shaking his head lightly. "Do I really seem like that to you? After everything I've told you? It's… it's because I can't leave you here."
The quiet admission hit you like a punch to the gut. His voice was raw, carrying the weight of emotions he wasn't trying to hide. "I tried convincing myself this wasn't my fight," he said, his tone steady despite the tremor of emotion beneath it. "That it wasn't my place. But I can't look away—not from you."
You stood there, stunned, his words unravelling every defence you'd spent years building. For so long, you'd believed no one cared, that you were nothing more than an expendable experiment. And yet here he was, defying all logic, holding on when anyone else would have let go.
For a fleeting moment, it felt like more than just a declaration of resolve—something deeper lingered in his tone. But there was no time to entertain such thoughts. Survival was the only thing that mattered now.
"Seonghwa…" His name escaped your lips in a fragile whisper, but he shook his head gently.
"We'll talk later," he said firmly, the resolve in his voice leaving no room for argument. "Right now, we need to focus on getting you out of here."
And for the first time, you didn't argue.
The hallway was eerily silent as he guided you through the winding maze of corridors. His hand hovered near your arm, not quite touching, as though even the smallest contact might betray too much. You followed in reluctant steps, each one heavier than the last as the realisation sank in: he wasn't leading you to the fake room they'd assigned you for appearances. No, this route was different. Familiar.
Your heart clenched when you recognised it—this was the way to your actual room. Or cell, as it truly was. The sterile walls, the reinforced door, the cold, suffocating solitude that awaited you there. He really did know everything.
Your thoughts spiralled as you walked. Did he also know how you ended up here? Did he also know the pieces of you that had been stripped away, piece by agonising piece, until nothing but a shell remained? Did he also know about the dreams you used to have—the kind of dreams the old you had cherished? The ones where you imagined falling in love with someone kind, someone who could see the best in you? Someone like him.
But he wasn't supposed to be here, warming the frozen corners of your heart, making it ache in ways you'd long forgotten. He wasn't supposed to make you hope.
"We're here," his voice broke through your thoughts, soft yet steady. You stopped, realising you'd reached the corridor just outside your cell. He'd led you to a blind spot—where no cameras could see—but this was as far as he could go.
For a moment, neither of you moved. You stared at the path ahead, the one that led to your isolation, and swallowed the lump in your throat. "We are," you whispered, your voice barely audible.
"Seonghwa," you started, your gaze dropping to his hand. Your fingers twitched, hesitant, unsure whether to reach out. The war between your heart and your mind raged louder than ever. Before you could decide, he closed the distance, his larger, warmer hand enveloping yours.
Your breath caught as his touch sent a jolt through you. His grip was firm yet gentle, grounding you in a way nothing else ever had. You looked up, finding his eyes already on you—deep, searching, and unguarded in a way that made your chest tighten.
"Yes?" he asked, his voice a soft murmur that carried so much weight it made you dizzy. He didn't know it, but your world shifted with the way he looked at you, as though you were the only thing that mattered.
You opened your mouth to speak, only to falter as the emotions welled up, threatening to spill over. Gratitude. Guilt. Longing. Words felt inadequate. Instead, you squeezed his hand, a small, fragile gesture that felt monumental in the space between you. "I…" You swallowed hard, summoning the courage to continue. "I just want to thank you for trying so hard. For… caring."
His brow furrowed slightly, but he stayed silent, letting you finish. "I need you to know," you continued, your voice trembling. "It doesn't matter if I get out of here. I'm just… glad to have met you."
Your heart ached with the weight of the truth behind your words. You knew what you were saying wasn't fair to him, that it sounded like a goodbye. Slowly, you began to pull your hand away, but he held on, his touch firm yet tender, as though he couldn't bear to let go.
And then he did something that made your breath hitch—something you didn't expect.
Leaning in, Seonghwa pressed his lips to your forehead. The gesture was soft, deliberate, and filled with more emotion than any words could ever convey.
Your eyes closed instinctively, your breath catching as his warmth lingered. When he pulled back, his gaze burned with a fierce determination that left no room for argument.
"No," he said, his voice low but resolute. "Don't say that. Don't act like this is the end. I already have a plan, and rest assured…" His hand tightened around yours, his determination radiating through his touch. "I will get out of here tomorrow—with you."
The certainty in his voice left you stunned, your chest tightening as tears brimmed at the corners of your eyes. For a fleeting moment, the silence between you spoke louder than any words could. How...? you wanted to ask, but the question stayed lodged in your throat. You were exhausted—exhausted from fighting, from merely surviving. For once, you wanted to let someone else carry the weight for you. So, you didn't question him.
You simply nodded, unable to summon your voice. Turning to walk the final stretch alone, your steps felt heavier with every inch that separated you. Still, an inexplicable pull made you glance back one last time. His eyes were on you, unwavering, filled with a promise that neither of you dared put into words.
The moment stretched, unspoken yet profound, and though nothing was said, everything was understood.
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"How has he been?" Madame Scarlet asked, her tone sharp and expectant as she gazed at your trainer.
The woman lowered her head respectfully before responding, "He's… unexpectedly cooperative and professional, ma'am. He's provided us with some excellent ideas for enhancement and has never once intervened in any of Subject 01's training—the sessions he was permitted to supervise, at least."
The founder raised a brow, a self-satisfied grin curling her lips. "Hm. Perhaps the Gentleman truly does admire our ways," she mused, leaning back in her chair. "I suppose his extended stay would only be beneficial to us. After all, we'd be foolish not to recognise his value as an influential figure within his group. His prolonged presence serves as leverage. Keep him close—subtly manipulate his loyalty and extract information. The Black Pirates wouldn't even realise we're gaining the upper hand in the alliance."
A low chuckle sounded from the doorway, smooth and familiar. "How smart," Seonghwa drawled, stepping into the room with deliberate confidence, "but not nearly smart enough."
The founder's grin froze, her eyes snapping to the intruder with disbelief. You followed closely behind him, your heart hammering as you caught the flash of unease in her expression—a crack in the armour of control she always wore.
"G-Gentleman Park," she stammered, rising from her seat. Her composure wavered, but she quickly tried to mask it with a welcoming smile. "You're surprisingly early today. And you, my darling," she said, her gaze shifting to you with forced sweetness. "Aren't you supposed to be—"
"At her daily isolation chamber session?" the gang member interrupted smoothly, his lips curling into a sardonic smirk. "Ah, Madame, do you take me for a fool?"
The trainer stiffened, her hand twitching toward her hidden pistol. Madame Scarlet's smile faltered as her eyes flicked to the briefcase in his hand. Her mind raced, trying to assess the situation.
Seonghwa stepped closer, placing the briefcase on her desk with a measured grace. "I believe I've overstayed my welcome," he said casually. "On behalf of my Captain, I declare it's time to finalise our alliance and take my leave—on one condition."
The lady narrowed her eyes, her voice cold and sharp. "Name it."
"I'm taking her with me," he said, gesturing to you without hesitation.
The founder's face darkened, her calm slipping further. "Over my dead body," she hissed.
He chuckled, a low, dangerous sound. "That can be arranged."
The trainer moved, but he raised a hand in mock surrender, laughing lightly. "Relax. I'm only kidding. How would our alliance flourish if you were dead, Madame?" He tilted his head, amusement dancing in his eyes, though his tone carried a weight that silenced the room.
"You're playing a dangerous game," Madame Scarlet warned, but her voice lacked its usual confidence.
"Oh, I never play without knowing I'll win," he countered, his smirk sharpening as he opened the briefcase. Inside lay meticulously organised files, a hard drive, and a stack of DVDs. He slid a folder across the desk toward her.
"In here," he began, his voice dropping to a measured calm, "you'll find all the proof you need of your inhumane operations. Experiment logs, surveillance footage, and even testimonies from staff who've grown tired of being complicit. What do you think would happen if a third party were to get their hands on this?"
The lady's hand trembled as she opened the folder. Her lips pressed into a thin line, her eyes scanning the damning contents.
"You wouldn't," she said, her voice low and dangerous.
"Oh, I would," Seonghwa replied, leaning forward slightly. "And I'll make sure your rivals and the authorities receive copies if you refuse my terms. Imagine the chaos that would bring to your empire."
Her composure shattered for a moment, her nails digging into the desk as she glared at him. "You underestimate me."
"No," he said, his voice soft but firm, "I don't. I know exactly who you are, Madame Scarlet. That's why I'm giving you a choice: agree to let her leave with me, or watch your empire crumble under scrutiny."
Her fury was almost tangible, her chest rising and falling with barely contained rage. But she was cornered, and they both knew it.
Madame Scarlet's nails dug into her palm, her usual composure shattered as she took a step closer to him. Her voice, laced with venom, quivered just slightly. "You realise what you're risking, don't you? My network reaches farther than you can imagine. The Black Pirates may be formidable, but do you truly believe your Captain will protect you once I make you a liability?"
Seonghwa didn't flinch. Instead, he tilted his head, a faint smirk playing at the corner of his lips. "Oh, Madame, threats only work when they hold weight. Do you think I'd walk in here unarmed? The Captain knows everything. This"—he gestured to the briefcase—"was sent with his blessing. Your reach ends where my ship begins."
The elderly woman's jaw clenched, her desperation now thinly veiled. "If you expose me, you'll bring chaos to yourself as well! The Black Pirates thrive on secrecy and reputation. Do you want to be the man who compromises that for some… experiment?" Her gaze flickered to you, cold and calculating.
"Nice try," he said, his tone turning colder. "But let's not pretend this is about me. The difference between you and me is simple: I protect the people I care about. You exploit them."
She growled in frustration, turning her attention to you. "And you?" she demanded, her voice suddenly softening as she changed tactics. "You're really going to leave with him? After all we've done for you?" Her words dripped with artificial kindness, a mask of sympathy stretched over her true intentions.
"I saved you from a life of obscurity," she continued, taking a step closer to you. "You'd still be a nobody if not for me. I gave you a purpose, a reason to exist. Is this how you repay me? By abandoning everything I built for you?"
You hesitated, her words striking a nerve. But the warmth of Seonghwa's hand slipping into yours steadied you, his unwavering presence a reminder of what truly mattered. Taking a deep breath, you turned to face her fully, your voice trembling at first but growing stronger with every word.
"You didn't save me," you said, your eyes locked on hers. "You broke me. You took everything I was—everything I could have been—and turned it into a weapon. You didn't give me a purpose; you stole it from me."
Her face darkened, but you pressed on, the weight of your emotions spilling over. "And now, you want me to feel sorry for you? To believe that what you did was for my own good? No, ma'am. The only thing you ever gave me was pain. And I refuse to let you keep me in chains any longer."
Her façade cracked completely, her expression twisting with rage and disbelief. "You ungrateful—"
The Gentleman's voice cut through her outburst, sharp and final. "Enough." He stepped between you and the founder, his presence a wall of protection. "You've lost, Madame. Accept it with what little dignity you have left."
Her hands shook, her gaze darting between the two of you. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came. The power she had wielded so effortlessly for years was gone, slipping through her fingers like sand.
As the gang member led you out of the room, you cast one final glance over your shoulder. Madame Scarlet stood frozen, her empire teetering on the brink of collapse. The desperation in her eyes was a silent scream, her ironclad control shattered. For the first time, you felt no fear, no guilt—only a liberating wave of freedom as the door began to close behind you.
But then, in a heartbeat, that freedom threatened to slip away. Your blood ran cold as you spotted your trainer's hand darting to her concealed weapon as she muttered one last, "You're not going anywhere." The barrel of her gun gleamed, aimed directly at your saviour's back.
"Seonghwa—" you started, your voice catching in your throat.
He didn't need the warning. As though he had anticipated every move, he spun around with fluid precision. The room seemed to freeze, the air electric with tension. Before she could even pull the trigger, a single gunshot cracked through the silence.
The trainer's body crumpled to the floor, her lifeless eyes wide in shock. A gaping wound marred her forehead, blood pooling beneath her as her weapon clattered uselessly from her grasp.
You stood rooted in place, your breath caught in your chest. The woman who had tormented you for so long was gone—forever silenced, her cruelty ended in an instant. A part of you felt the weight of her death, but a stronger, quieter part of you reveled in the knowledge: she could never hurt you again.
Seonghwa lowered his gun with practised ease, his expression unreadable as he turned to the elderly woman. The faintest smirk tugged at his lips as he tilted his head, mock apology dripping from his voice. "Oops," he drawled, his tone light but laced with menace. "I warned you there'd be consequences."
He took a deliberate step toward her, the dominance in his presence impossible to ignore. "This alliance between us is hereby solidified, by order of the Black Pirates. I trust the terms and conditions are now clear, Madame Scarlet?"
Her gaze flickered from the corpse of her loyal trainer to his unyielding stare. Fury bubbled beneath her trembling exterior, but she nodded sharply, biting back the venom she longed to unleash.
As Seonghwa turned back to you, his hand steady and reassuring on the small of your back, you caught the flicker of regret in the founder's expression. She had underestimated him, underestimated you. Letting your paths cross was her greatest mistake—a mistake she would carry for the rest of her life.
With every step you took away from that room, you felt the weight of your chains fall further behind. This time, freedom was not just a fleeting thought—it was real. And nothing could take it from you now.
The tension in Seonghwa's shoulders finally eased as he guided you into the sleek black car waiting outside—a vehicle Hongjoong had discreetly arranged to ensure your safe departure. The weight of what had just transpired lingered heavily in the air, but for the first time in what felt like forever, the Gentleman allowed himself a quiet moment of relief.
The engine purred to life, and as the car rolled away from the Red Room's shadowed compound, he turned to you. His smile was soft, almost hesitant, as his dark eyes met yours. There was no victory in his expression, only a quiet resolve.
"You're safe now," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "With me."
But even as he said it, his mind remained sharp, calculating. He knew the cost of what he'd done. The alliance between the Black Pirates and the Red Room is now balanced on a precarious thread of necessity rather than trust. Madame Scarlet's eyes would always be watching, her reach always extending, waiting for an opportunity to regain the upper hand.
And then, there was home. The gang wouldn't welcome you without question. The members' wrath would be swift and fierce—his brothers would demand an explanation for his actions, for the risks taken, for the unknown you now represented. What would they do with you? The uncertainty gnawed at the edges of his thoughts, but he pushed it aside for now.
The road ahead would be anything but easy, but Seonghwa had made his choice. He couldn't promise to bring you back to the life you once had, couldn't undo the scars left behind. But what he could do—what he would do—was protect you. No matter what it took, he vowed to keep you safe.
As the car disappeared into the night, leaving the hellhole behind, he leaned his head back against the seat. His fingers brushed yours, a silent reassurance. Whatever came next, you would face it together.
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"Huh, so he actually managed to threaten the Red Room and come out on top?" the figure mused, his lips curving into an impressed pout. "Looks like the rumours about him weren't exaggerated after all. The Gentleman really isn't someone to be underestimated."
With a smirk, he snapped the file shut and tossed it carelessly onto the pile beside the Captain's already-closed dossier. "Too bad he's gained a weakness in the process. Watching the Firestarter's reaction to this is going to be... entertaining."
His subordinate stepped forward, handing him another file. "Indeed, sir. But for now, the Enforcer appears to be making some interesting moves at the Prestige Asylum."
"Oh, is he now?" The figure's grin widened. "How charming."
So, uhh... if I said I wasn't at all feeling pressured while writing this after the amazing reviews Hongjoong's chapter received, I'd be lying. I'm worried it might be slightly disappointing since this contained a lot less of the 'romance' aspect compared to the Captain's story - but I wanted it to be realistic, and realistically speaking, I don't think the danger would leave them much space for romance.
Anyway, I still hope you enjoyed this! I'm super excited to hear what you all think about the concept and whether or not you've noticed the subtle details relating to the ATEEZ lore.
As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3
General ATEEZ Tag list:
@aurasblue @marievllr-abg @itsvxlentine @minghaoslatina @huachengsbestie01
@evidive @weedforthoughtz @minkiflwr @cheolliehugs @ho3-for-yunho
@the-kpop-simp @itstheghostofmypast @vantediary @green-agent @skzline
@sharksandminhos @writingwieny @heyitsmetonid @tinyteezer @hollxe1
@pandabur666 @vampzity @tournesol155 @lilactangerine @oddracha
@haven-cove @idfkeddieishot @vic0921 @vnessalau @apriecotte
@bangtannie7 @vtyb23 @khjoongie98 @scuzmunkie @anxiousskylar
@bunny4yungi @zl-world @quailbagutte @astudyoftimeywimeystuff
By Order of the Black Pirates Tag list:
@bethelighthalazia @tsunchani @starboyyoongi @soulphoenix1618 @dimeb29
@naps-over-degree @uniq-tastic @baeksofty @hanoishere @star-my
@skteezcursed @soocore @mountiiny @londonbridges01 @lemon-sage17
@ffenjoyerdazme @frequentlykit @callmeagardengnome @side-angel @byeolttongbye0l
@cotton-candycloudz @foxinnie8 @atinyreads @iwishiwasrichasfuck @sansaurora9904
@megseungmin @frobin4ever @holytidalwavechees3cake @hyukssunflower @babigriin
@haipyeongie @hyuninslutbbgirl @nuggiesnuggetdog04 @skersey33 @h3arteyes4mingi
All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.
#edenesth#by order of the black pirates#the gentleman#ice on my teeth#ateez#ateez fanfic#ateez fanfiction#gang au#park seonghwa#seonghwa x reader#ateez fic
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Hi, I'm curious about your headcanons for Mr. Gap please please
Hello~ You got me thinking! I decided to make it in an iceberg format. It will start with cute headcanons, then dive into the darker, sad, or anxious ones. ✦ . ⁺ The Surface ⁺ New language: If Mr Gap picked up some human words, they’d definitely be swear words. And he’d easily find situations to use them. ⁺ I’m in your bed: He doesn’t have a concept of many things, like not fully understanding that he can cause pain (bites worse than Mr Chopped, be careful) or even what personal space is (try teaching him to knock first).
⁺ Give me that: He’s super into random little things from our world. Like, who else would sit there flipping through magazines, right? So of course he’d want to grab something cool for his collection. Personal items are probably a lot safer than, you know, body parts.
The Icy Current ⁺ Solitude: He likes it when you talk to him. But he’s usually ignored, so he acts this way to get attention. And he really doesn’t like it when you spend too much time with other. Jealousy? He won’t admit it, but he’ll do something to put a stop to it. ⁺ Am I good?: Mr Gap definitely has a praise kink. He absolutely loves it when you tell him he’s good. It’s important for him to prove he’s better than everyone else. ⁺ Obsessive Attachment: He was incredibly bored, but with you, life feels fun. Of course, he doesn’t want to lose that. Dark Waters ⁺Just Like Others: He watches others and listens to them. He mimics their behavior. It’s quite possible that he started asking "Are you okay?" after noticing others doing it and seeing the positive reaction it gets. ⁺ Everything has a price: Mr Gap doesn’t like doing things, especially not for free. That’s why he always asks for something in return, like a heart or hair. But in the scene with Mr. Scarletella, he steps out of his role as an observer because he can’t let him take you. ⁺ His Plan: Mr Gap seems to manipulate events around you invisibly, ensuring you stay close to him and free from any distractions. It all appears coincidental, but it’s clearly anything but. The Depths ⁺ Why a Heart?: Mr Gap probably doesn’t feel good without his own body. That’s why, when he asks for human body parts, it’s like he’s trying to fill that emptiness. ⁺ It will be my way: Mr Gap has an ability to move through space. What’s interesting is that he can bring the MC back from one world to another. Time is probably not under his control, but he can literally take them anywhere he wants. This is a powerful skill. ⁺ Immortality: He claims he cannot be killed. Even though //spoiler// we can kill several key characters with our own hands. ✦ . ⁺ Something like this, most of it is based on dialogues I’ve read, and I feel like it’s quite accurate.
#mr gap#homicipher#文字化化#homicipher spoilers#homicipher x reader#homicipher headcanons#mr gap x you#homicipher fanfiction#mr. gap#homicipher mc#homicipher mr gap#visual novel#otome game#隙間の男
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Alfred had caught everyone in the batfam trying to cook at some point.
Bruce
He was trying to cook Dick his favorite food after a particularly bad patrol night, but he didn't actually know Dick's favorite food or how to cook. Bruce had his phone in one hand covered in raw chicken and opened up on a recipe, and in the other hand he had..sugar? The kitchen was an absolute mess.
Alfred came in and immediately kicked Bruce out to take over. After he was done he sent Bruce back in the wash the dishes and clean up. Bruce never tried to cook again.
Dick
Wally had given him a recipe to try, since the speedster was always eating he knew all kinds of good foods. Everything was going surprisingly well as Dick followed the recipe step by step to not mess up- until it was time to cook the food in the oven.
Alfred walked into a smoke filled kitchen and a panicked Dick holding a burning pan of food. Luckily nothing had been damaged, but Dick smelled like smoke for the next week and was never allowed *unsupervised* in the kitchen. Alfred surprisingly was okay with helping him learn to cook though.
Jason
He was trying to cook a nice meal for Roy after they both got into a pretty bad fight during a joint patrol. He also maybe wanted to impress Roy too. He ended up spilling multiple items, used the wrong seasonings, and undercooked the meat.
Alfred showed up before Roy could eat it, probably saved them all a hospital visit honestly. He did promise to help Jason remake what ever he was trying to make, but sent them both to rest while he cleaned up. They ended up getting sandwiches from Alfred.
Tim
Since his parents were never around, and he had no one to cook for him Tim actually learned how to. Once getting adopted by Bruce he never really cooked anymore(other then at the tower for his teammates), but he would often bake!
Alfred liked Tims chocolate chip cookies and allowed him in the kitchen whenever with a promise to clean up. No one else knows, they just never question the baked goods that show up every once in a while.
Damian
He sucks at cooking. Like, under cooked or over cooked food, either no seasoning or too much, he doesn't know what taste good with what. However, Damian is amazing at baking. He can easily bake the most complicated things and it always turns out so good. He doesn't bake a lot though, but sometimes during special occasions he will for others. He probably learned how to bake only out of spite or something.
Alfred has seen him baking once or twice now, always leaving him be since he looks so peaceful when in the kitchen. He absolutely loves it when he will come in after Damian had left and finds some baked good with a little note written for him. Highlight of his week/month.
Duke
Don't let him in a kitchen. Let him in there and you will be replacing everything. No one has ever figured out exactly what he does in there but Tim and Dick are sure it's radioactive experiments at this point.
Alfred takes a week off everytime he sees Duke walking into the kitchen alone. He had given up on trying to stop the boy. He just leaves before whatever mess can happens, and returns once the kitchen is out back together. (Sometimes the batfam sends him in just got the purpose of getting Alfred to take a vacation.)
Barbara
She isn't the *best* at cooking, never having thought to learn past the basic skills, but she likes to help Alfred cook sometimes! It helps her relax on stressful days, the easy routine that sets into place when she joins Alfred.
Alfred likes having Barbara's help. He will have her doing good prep as he does other things before starting to cook. Sometimes he will teach her some things, maybe even give her a recipe that only he knows. Whenever she attempts to cook alone with him only watched and gets the meal perfect Alfred has a sense of pride!
#Alfred is so tired of the batfam#the kitchen has beed fix or replaced over a dozen times now#tim and damian secretly bake together#at least when they are arguing over whos better at it#tim drake#jason todd#damian wayne#bruce wayne#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#duke thomas#barbara gordon#cooking#baking#fluff
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Viktor x Reader Personal Pigments (Part 15) - Rich Gold
This is a jayvik x reader fic now but it'll still be labeled as a Vik Fic until it's fully implemented. Ft. a visit from Mel! Find my imagine that inspired it here. Previous and next chapter will be linked at the bottom.
Planning on writing as much as I can this weekend to post in bulk before Christmas week, I'll be traveling a distance away and can't bring my laptop with me.
stay tuned and Thank you for reading <3
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The two men had been working over there for the last hour. The last thirty minutes of which they had spent muttering too quietly to discern. When you cast a look their way, curious about the whispering, you are presented with something very interesting. Jayce was standing by Viktor’s chair, his hand tracing a pattern you couldn’t make out on the lithe man’s back. That usually would not be cause for concern, it wasn’t something you had really seen before but nothing that risqué. The fact that Jayce was bent down by Viktor’s face whispering something that made his pale skin glow red? That was new. And intimate. And something you probably shouldn’t be seeing.
It stirs a warmth deep in your stomach that you furiously try to tamp down. Whatever was happening over there was not your concern. The sketch you were working on was. When you had shown Viktor and Jayce your sketchbook they both lingered at the same spot. Answer enough. You had several iterations of it sketched out, that should have been a sign. You’ve had this happen before though. Where your subconscious had fully decided on something, and pushed it to you again and again, and it took something else to make you realize that you already knew what you wanted. So you tear your gaze away from whatever flirtations the two were engaging in to go back to your sketch.
General composition confirmed. Now you need to decide on little details. Foxgloves for ambition. Or Hollyhock? The former also could represent ambition for another person, not just your own glory. Fitting for their commitment to each other and their Hextech dream. Golden Rod for encouragement and Grapes for charity. King Cup for yellow to go with the Golden Rod, and to represent their wish for it to prosper. Purple or yellow for the Carnations to show pride? So many options. The petals of all of these flowers and more were sketched out in front of you. Changing their colors, layering, placement. Part of your panic in selecting a final composition earlier was knowing that Mel would be visiting today.
She had come in a few days ago looking for Jayce. Something about their next council meeting, What to and not to say. Who to kiss up to. Who to placate. Versing him, and Viktor by association, on the proper etiquette. Viktor had told you once that Jayce already knew everything he really needed to know from his patrons the Kirramans. Yet he listened to her with rapt attention. When she was done with them she floated by your station, ever graceful steps on the tile. Her jewelry clinked softly with each movement, like a quiet chorus of bells and crystals. Something about her presence was anxiety inducing and enchanting all at the same time. She thrummed with something otherworldly.
Mel had set a date and time for her to visit with you, something that you considered a luxury. A councilor taking interest in your art was one thing. The idea had crossed your mind when you had applied for this project, part of why you had considered it in the first place. Not to climb any ladders, but to make sure you could stay here in Piltover. Now you were teetering on an edge of potential friendship or securing stability. You felt that you were not one whose words were graceful enough to secure, well, anything. Felt that your skills laid in your hands. Hands that you were doing your best to keep moving despite the appointment you had set grew closer and closer to the present.
You were finally hitting a groove when there was a familiar sound pulling you away from the sketchpad. A scraping sound. The lab door is opening and Mel’s gentle footsteps clack against the tile floor. Smooth and swift movements to cross over the lab. She held a box in one hand. This time she didn’t immediately stop at Jayce’s or Viktor’s station. Direct line of motion to you. You stand and brush your hands against your slacks. When you glance in the men’s direction, they had separated and turned to the both of you. You realized that you did not know if Mel was aware of how deep their partnership ran. A blush on both their faces. It was cute and you try not to smile at the sight. You instead shift your gaze to Mel and offer her your smile instead.
“Forgive the intrusion,” her voice like honey, “are you ready?”
“Yes! Just a moment.” You’re grabbing a pouch and sketchbook. Today was going to be more of a walk-and-talk situation, you doubted you’d have the time to really draw anything. Still, you wanted to be prepared. As you’re gathering your supplies you hear Mel talking with Viktor and Jayce.
“Councilor Hoskel sends his regards.” You turn to see Jayce opening the box, the largest bottle of wine you had ever seen and two glasses inside. Piltover’s iconic gold filigree crawling up the bases, stems, and swirling around the bottom of the bowls. Expensive.
“Whatever for?” Viktor’s holding one of the glasses now, turning it in the light of the lab. Watching as it glitters, it seems that there may be small jewels set into the whorls and swirls. Very expensive.
“Truth be told, it’s a set he gave me. I thought that it would be better enjoyed here. I know that these meetings are growing repetitive. Consider it an incentive to continue your hard work.” Usually Viktor would scoff and mutter some reply about how they did not need incentives, but he’s eyeing the bottle of wine. It’s Jayce who stutters out their thanks and puts the box on the table behind him.
Mel just nods, pristine and simple before turning to you. “Shall we?” You give Viktor and Jayce a nod of your own and trail behind her when she starts walking towards the door. The two of you make your way to the hallway.
“Thank you for making time for this Counc-,” Her head tilts with her raised brow. “Mel.”
“Despite the finery and brilliance here in Piltover it is hard to find minds worth talking to.” Your cheeks heat. That was a compliment right? “If those two let you stay with them, then you must be intriguing.”
“I’m just painting.” It’s hard to keep the doubt out of your voice. Doubt that she thinks you are worth spending her little free time with. Doubt that Jayce and Viktor find you intriguing.
“You have grown close with them. I'm glad. The two are so busy I worry that they forgot how to make friends.” When she notices you falling behind she slows her pace. Having you at her side like you were equals.
“You're a friend too aren't you?” A genuine question. Jayce had a crush yes, but her frequent visits didn’t imply to you that she returned the sentiment. Her energy was so kind, warm like the sun. It was hard for you to believe that she didn’t want companionship.
“Mmm. Perhaps. I'm not sure both of them would agree with that." You both give faint laughs at that. She continues. “I would like to be a friend to you though. We will need to find time to paint together soon.” The statement settles around your shoulders, the air around your ears buzzing.
“Yes, I’d like that too.” This time it’s your chest heating, swelling at the thought of being friends with Mel Medarda. “Those two could probably use a solo lab day.”
“You know with your skills, you could help promote them.” Your steps falter for a moment.
“What do you mean?” Promote them how? Why? Questions she is reading on your face.
“Job security after your painting is done. They'll need someone who can help them advertise, especially once Hextech goes public.” She says it like it’s the only logical conclusion. Finality in her belief alone.
You hadn't thought about that. Well, you had. When you first met them you had brought it up as an idea for someone else to do. Not yourself, you hadn’t assumed it would be you. And the look on her face tells you she knew that. Like she knows everything. Not in a patronizing way, but in a calming one.
“I’m not sure how they’d feel about that.” They both didn't like the amount of schmoozing they were having to do now. If you helped with anything it could be selecting designs but you weren’t a designer or typographer. And if the other advertisements you’d seen plastered around Piltover spoke for what she would want you to make, it would be their faces. Having their faces plastered around everything is not something you thought they'd like either. This city is all about claiming credit for things that went well and sweeping things under the rug if they didn’t.
“They are fond of you. I’m sure they would agree to it.” You give a friendly scoff at that word. Fond of you? The word makes your heart warm more than it has already. And your face. The upturn of Mel’s lips doesn’t help either. Nor does the hand she places on your shoulder. “Consider it for a friend?”
You’re looking at her hand, her arm. Eyes meeting hers. Such genuine eyes. Green and glittering with the gold in her hair, on the freckles speckling her face. You raise a hand slowly to place on hers. “For a friend.”
“Good!” She pulls her hand away and motions for you to walk with her. “Enough talk of those boys.” You join her side again as you travel around the halls of the Academy. You talk about art, about the pleasant memories you had of Zaun and she lets very little slip of her childhood in Noxus. She shares artists you recognize the names of, some you don’t. You shared that you make your own paint as a hobby. Leading the two of you to the topic of what paints you each preferred. It was nice. Talking to someone about things you truly did understand. Viktor and Jayce would explain their work to you, and you would listen. But finally talking to someone that was just as knowledgeable about art as you were was a breath of fresh air. You were explaining the process of tempera paints, and why you liked making them, not using them when someone calls for Mel.
A woman holding folders approaches, giving you a onceover before closing the distance.
“Elora. Is it that time already?”
“Yes, it seems that-”, she pauses before looking at you again. When Mel nods she resumes. “That there��s been a development on those trade routes we discussed earlier.”
“Hmm, it’s always something isn’t it.” She turns to you. “Thank you for our time today, a nice escape.” Mel places her hand on your shoulder again. “I do hope you’ll keep our talk in mind.”
“Ofcourse.” With that she leaves, Elora following behind her. When they round a corner you can hear their voices talking in a hushed tone. Imports and merchants being discussed as their voices and footsteps trail away. You’re left standing in the hallway. Realizing that with the couple hours that have passed you and Mel had traversed to a part of the Academy you were not familiar with.
A groan leaves you as you turn to where you had come from. So if you had taken a right here, then you should see a vase on your left…
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------------‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙· Master Fic List *̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊--------------
#I feel like Mel would be radiating arcane energy long before she became a mage and that plays into her playing wolf and fox so heavy to me#I honestly want to write an angsty melxreader fic where she wonders/realizes how much the people around her are there for her and not there#<- becuase she unwittingly manipulated them via the arcane. Not what is happening herebut i wonder#<- <- also i want her to be happy and writing her sad hurts me#fanfiction#fanfic#arcane#viktor arcane#x reader#viktor league of legends#viktor lol#jayvik#jayvikmel#jayce talis#mel medarda#elora arcane#artists talking like artists
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what a second... do you like the yandere trope 👀 not a formal request but like... the well is running dry on yandere versions of the lads men, any possibility you can write smth for them? u can do just Caleb if that makes u comfortable!! I just need yan!lnds but not many people in the fanbase do it 😔
i LOVE yandere!! especially when it’s well written 👌🏼
tbh, aside from caleb and (maybe) xavier, i can’t see any of the lads men as the yendere type, especially sylus. however, i think zayne can go down the yandere route at some point in his life.
i don’t have any plot ideas :( but i can tell you which types of yandere they are or they might be :)
caleb:
i think caleb would be the type of yandere who inserts himself in your life and plant his seeds of his possession from the start. he’s the type that will manipulate you into thinking he’s the only one you need. and that takes time and training. he’ll use a punishment and reward type of system; you do something wrong; he’ll either ignore you or give you short and clipped answers. you do something right and he’ll return to his usual self, praising you with smiles and a head pat.
he won’t outright isolate you from your friends but he’ll somehow convince you that they aren’t a priority.
xavier:
i don’t know anything about him since i always skip what he says lol so pls don’t came at me when i say he’s the jealous type of yandere.
he’s the type that has to be better than anyone else; stronger, faster, smarter, richer and so one and so forth.
xavier doesn’t like when guys approach you because he thinks they’re useless and aren’t worth your time.
zayne:
if zayne ever became a yandere, he’d be the overly obsessed type of yandere. he literally knows everything about you. What size shoes you wear, what type of toothpaste you use, what time you came home after work, the random elderly woman whom you helped cross the street and he even knows that you lost 0.5kg from a single glance.
he has to know who you’re with, where you are, why are you talking to someone, etc.
zayne even has several photo albums that he organized based on date, day, time and sometimes mood or weather. this guy’s nuts tbh.
sylus:
like i said, i can’t see him as the yandere type but if he were one, he’d be the harmless type. he’s aware of obsession over you so he knows how to control it.
sylus would be obsessed but not like zayne. he’s the type that places you on a pedestal, views you as a superior human so he must work hard to please and satisfy you.
he has you living in a gorgeous home. he’s showering you in money and adorns your arms in expensive jewelry. sylus is cooking delicious food, so good, that you never dine out or oder in anymore.
sylus loves you unconditionally, flaws and all. even when you do something wrong, he still accepts them because it a part of you. he doesn’t feel hurt because you often come around and correct your wrong doing.
rafayel:
he’s also the harmless type of yandere. his mantra is, “if you’re happy, then i’m happy.”
rafayel knows how to read you so he knows how to adapt to your mood. you’re upset? then he’ll be the perfect shoulder to cry on, the best therapist there is, he’d so anything to see you smiling again.
you’re feeling bright and bubbly? then rafayel is also intoxicated with exuberance. in need of a best friend, rafayel is there too.
like caleb, he molds himself into the perfect object for you to rely on. and if he doesn’t know something or doesn’t have a certain skill set, then he’ll teach and train himself until he masters them.
you don’t need friends, family or lovers to rely on when you have rafayel right there by your side.
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🎡 Wonderlands x Showtime's Affect On Eachother: An Analysis(? idk) 🎡
The thought of WxS never meeting eachother makes me so sick. Cough Cough this is from twitter but I will proceed to post on tumblr because. Smiles. Let's all learn on how WxS would've been if they all never met! With Poor Explanations
Tsukasa Tenma 🌟
Tsukasa probably wouldn't have taken steps to stardom, maybe his absolute selfishness would have not improved at all? Nor remember what he was TRULY aiming for? Maybe there could've been another way, but nobody knows. But how he acted in main story definitely wasn't gonna get him anywhere.. If he didn't agree to doing shows with Emu then, he wouldn't be where he is right now.
Sure, he would pass auditions and do shows in other places, but again, he wouldn't remember why he was going to be a star, and still be the same as he was in the main story. Tsukasa wouldn't realize that the Wonder Stage would absolutely help him in the future... and had no idea this would make so much beautiful memories.
Emu Otori 🍬
With Emu, the wonder stage would probably have gone boom already, with Phennyland also getting its "improvements". She probably would've been so saddened by it, having her dead Grandpa's place be changed like this, she SWEARED to protect it :( WxS literally were the ones to help her out when she was feeling down and confused on what to do over the possible change of Phennyland. They planned out the amazing show in Wonder Magical Showtime to save Phennyland, and they did!
And so on, Emu had gotten herself friends that she would always love and do shows with. And she is thankful for everything they've done for her, for the stage, for the park.
Nene Kusanagi 🤖
Nene has changed A WHOLE LOT. She's probably a bit shy still, but she has improved on her anxiety and trauma so much. That show in middle school she forgot the lines to affected her so much she had almost given up her dream of being an actress. Tsukasa yelling at her made it all WORSE. Using a robot to perform because she didn't want to face her audience after the incident, but it just made things worse. She didn't want to do perform ever again; But after getting reassurance from Tsukasa, maybe she could take a step forward.
Actually, from the support of everyone including WxS she was able to overcome her fear, and improve from her trauma, slowly getting more confident as time passed, and improving on her singing skills too, as seen in Canary. It's also thanks to WxS she improved.
Rui & Nene's Friendship 🎈🤖
If it wasn't for them, where else would she be right now? Where else *her and Rui* could be? Would they also have fixed their friendship if it wasn't for WxS? Short answer: Probably not. Actual answer: Since in middle school they were so distanced, it was obvious that they probably wouldn't speak on High School either. Rui did talk to Nene when he found WxS for the first time, but would they talk again after Nene messed up another show? The chances are low, because Rui would still be "doing shows alone" like how he said in Middle School. And yet, Nene still wouldn't find a way to help him.
So yes, if it wasn't for WxS, Rui and Nene wouldn't have closed the distance on their friendship. Nene would have been hopeless, just playing games as she used to say and Rui still alone, still being seen as a weirdo.
(ik he's still considered a "weirdo" but. you know what i mean.)
Rui Kamishiro 🎈
Do NOT get me started on this one. Rui said it himself, that WxS is his treasure. WxS literally changed his entire life, but mentioned by him, it is especially Tsukasa that "gave him the opportunity to change", since Tsukasa was the one to get him back in the troupe and in Wonder Halloween, even brought back his confidence to make shows his own way; Between so many other things. But both Emu and Nene have certainly given him a reason, too, and you all should never forget that. Rui treasures ALL of them dearly.
If he didn't join WxS, or atleast didn't join back, he would still be doing shows all alone. Maybe he would still be like how he used to be in Middle School. All alone. And in that case he wouldn't have so many other friends other than wxs like how he has them currently.
And there's a chance he would never have been scouted for Arcland? Well if someone there finds him doing shows maybe yeah prooobably but hey. Who knows?? But other than that he definitely wouldn't have healed if he didn't meet WxS.
Conclusion:
If WxS didn't meet eachother, they all probably wouldn't be where they are right now; The futures of the members wouldn't have been as much bright, and some specific members' mental health (such as Nene & Rui) probably wouldn't have improved much.
"But Asteroid yk they can find another ways right???" I am aware, BUT. As I said, Tsukasa would need to remember why he was truly a star and not be so selfish in specific occassions.
Emu,, well nothing much happening with her except for the fact one of the things that are most important to her was turned into something else, very much saddened by it, also some people probably wouldn't help her much with that fact.
Nene as I mentioned never reaching her dream due to her trauma surrounding her.
And Rui still doing shows alone, no one stopping by to see them, like always. Yeah someone actually kind could go and reach out to him but however that would turn out, I doubt that would do much of a change for him. PERCHANCE.
Yeah. WxS definitely changed eachother for the better and all of them wouldn't be more thankful. They are eachother's light of the darkness they were all once in.
The end. Long live wxs 🎡
#project sekai#wonderlands x showtime#tsukasa tenma#emu otori#nene kusanagi#rui kamishiro#analysis#prsk analysis#i think#WXS FOREVER!!!!!
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Love-Me, Love-Me-Nots Daisy : A Guide on Navigating In-Sys Relationships
Romantic relationship, situationship, friendship, kinship, partnership.. There's way too much to list in just one sentence!
Here's a random fact for this topic; People say first impression is reliable to know of the other person, and surprisingly they're only 51% accurate when it's about judging wether a person is extroverted. But will you be able to judge better when it comes to your own alters as you technically live in the same headspace?
All that aside, this post will address inner relationships as a whole. Use this chance to see this topic outside of the romantic stereotype that we always see! (X-mas Activity included)
FAST PASS: Not available--this is an important occasion, read the full post!
What's a "relationship" with no romance, then?
according to this quote,
"a continuing and often committed association between two or more people, as in a family, friendship, marriage, partnership, or other interpersonal link in which the participants have some degree of influence on each other’s thoughts, feelings, and actions." - Merriam Webster
Basically, it means there's atleast two people committing with the connection they have formed with each other to qualify as a relationship, no matter the form.
When it comes to systems, it is up to themselves to see alters as separate people, or as different versions of itself,, the idea still can be applied here: as rebuilding the connection you lost/dissociated with your yet-to-be-integrated personalities/facets.
Being a system is a relationship already?!
Well--yeah!
But let me explain a bit here.
As a complex living being, our brain is made to adapt through tasks that requires multifaceted thinking. This would mean you would incorporate both logical and emotional thoughts, curious and cautious perspectives, and any behavioral or social habits or patterns you have learnt which all condenses into one singular conclusion or action that seems to be the best for a current situation--which is also dependent on how your thought processes work.
That is the basic depiction of integrated thinking to agree on a solution, but for systems--this is fragmented, leaving short-sighted solutions based on each facets, which bypasses the "filter" to integrate multiple ideas as one. Now, creating many different solutions or outcomes you could take, which is equal to the amount of alters actively participating on the discussion.
I... guess you're still confused, which is why i prepared this visual representation:
This should explain everything i had described beforehand. Now im not sure if the quality is the best..
So yes, as a complex being, you had already own different views which take skills to talk it out into one unified resolution.
Especially, if your different views you have can influence what actions, feelings, or reaction you get. That's your own emotional and mental dynamic when it comes to navigating your own map of thoughts. A literal relationship with the self..!
Eg. "I love this food! But i can't eat too much or else i'll feel sick" When you have a passion of food driven by emotional resonance, you still have a logical side that completes the thought to exact a reasoning without over-eating.
A.. Self Relationship..?
It's not a cringe thing at all. Trust. No cap.
There's literally a concept named self-care, which focuses on maintaining your health, emotional wellness, and enrichment in your life. Another term accepted widely by society is a self-date where you treat yourself similarly like a partner, focuses on practicing self love--this one would talk about how do you approach your different views (or alters, for systems), as a form of self regulation and processing.
To put this within context, you're a system, and, that means there are multiple parts of yourselves (or people) that are separated through dissociative barriers. This means you are disconnected with the majority of your multifaceted nature,, which also means you do not have a good relationship with yourself.
Simply put, this is where you learn to meet your needs again. As described from the hierarchy of needs by Maslow.
--
From a more general view, a negative relationship with yourself looks like:
A sense of distrust with your gut feelings
Unable to accept certain feelings or traits of your own
Self-blame/hate
Ignoring/neglecting your emotional and mental health
Unsure of your likes, dislikes, or favorite things
Not allowing yourself to be authentic (masking)
Operates in shame and focusing on failures
Not feeling you have worth or deserving of good things
Internal suppressing (notable for alter dynamics in systems)
System things that branch out from a negative relationship with yourself additionally appears as:
Fighting for front with different parts
Oftentimes arguing, playing down other's opinion
Feeling uncomfortable around headmates
Crippling sense of loneliness/disconnection amidst your alters
Things like shame, guilt, negative opinions of others, or poor treatment often shapes an unhealthy relationship with yourself.
The reason behind this is when your external environment is an enemy (eg. instead of supporting, you're being blamed) to you and your integrity, you may consciously or unconsciously pick up behaviors where you must abandon yourself to appease others and survive better, which means you have been taught to be an enemy of your own in order to live. Absolutely not nice.
Oh god. Can i ever break from this habit?
Ofcourse you can, but oftentimes your system are not in terms with some or most alters at the first place. It is normal to have a difficult or a conflicted dynamic within your other selves, and, you totally can shift this negative relationship with your own parts into a healthier and cooperative one!
It's better to take it nice and slow--i'll briefly show the steps on how to start demolishing this tensioned dynamic:
Inspire yourself with the idea of how working together would help in tackling difficult days.
Be aware of your negative thoughts or reactions when interacting with your parts, make sure that you don't act out on it. Also take this as a sign to un-learn some sabotaging or passive aggressive behaviors!
Help bringing awareness to the collective of their reactive behaviors, and reflect what can be done to increase better communication without conflict involved.
Parts often listen to their own egos--not caring about other alters and doing impulsive things while fronting. Bring clarity to how their actions impact the collective, and even themselves at the future. This would help foster more teamwork.
After some degree of awareness and cooperation has been established, do small acts of kindness for each other to strengthen the bond. This is also a good time to give roles and jobs, ensuring trust and that your back is covered.
The rest of this phase is up to you and how your natural dynamic and system works, good luck!
Waddya think of in-sys romance then..
We've briefed ourselves on what relationship constitutes as, and what does it mean generally to systems. Which means, In-sys partners and their romantic relationship is a valid (plural form) of fostering self love, akin to self-dates.
A good cooperation with your alters means a good relationship and terms with any alters you have--wether they have a purpose or not in your system. When it comes to internal romance situations, it focuses as a specific integration that your alters are going through. This will create a fusion between two or more headmates due to the dissociative barriers between them broke down.
It takes a long way to start loving yourself after years of internal disputes and conflict which perpetuates the high dissociation with each other, don't feel ashamed of it!
Are romantic relationships mandatory?
No they are not, but they are one of the most intimate, personal forms of self bonding. You still can heal and bond through cooperation and camaraderie, and everyone's styles are different, so let's not judge 'em.
Of course, romantic relationships within your system offers some pros that a normal comrade-dynamic cannot replicate:
Deeper understanding of your alters emotionally
Getting your love-needs met when you never received any proper care
Often faster to start integrating than a typical relationship
Another way to work around negative sense of worth and habits
Definitely, with some cons too:
Some alters are not compatible together, which creates friction
Unresolved habits or beliefs that blocks them from truly embracing love and care
Often frowned upon to have in-sys partners by communities, that prevents them from fully immersing in it
It brings up uncomfortable or painful truths or unresolved trauma, then to be faced and healed from
Not an extensive list, but you now got the idea. Use this list to prepare or broaden your knowledge on what romantic relationships look like!
Lastly. Did you also know that you can have parental dynamics in your system? it is similar to the romantic one, yet now driven with a different kind of love, just like a caretaker with their child parts. They are also important to heal, and feel safer after having trauma from younger times.
Takeaway & Together Activities
At the end of the day, no matter how many daisies you've plucked, a flower can't tell what's the answer to your internal relationships--romantically or not, for your system.
How do you see system dynamics differently now? There are many lessons packed in one posts that you could bring home. I definitely think that internal relationships are rarely discussed, so i gave it my all to create this entire topic, consisting of different system dynamics!
Lastly, internal relationships don’t need to be limited to serious work--they can also be fostered through shared joy and celebration! With Christmas approaching, here’s the five-day activity plan to build your bond together as i promised previously:
DAY 1
Reflect on how far you've all come. The year is coming to an end, what are the proudest moments or milestones of your system journey this year?
DAY 2
The day after reflection, what gratitude do you have for your alters? It's best to let them know you truly appreciate their work and efforts to keep things afloat before new years--let them know you feel supported by them, and willing to support them back!
DAY 3
Discuss how you would spend the whole day with others/your partner. Do you like outings? Watching movies? Or do you have multiple recommendations to do? Even if you are limited to night time only, go for it! You deserve a day to do the things you want.
DAY 4
There's one day left before the famous holiday, Take a moment to ponder on what you could get for others--if there's no money, consider a homemade gift like a memorial art, or letters,, make sure to keep them a secret before the day.
DAY 5
Don't forget to give each other's presents if you have prepared from the day before. Any consumables are also allowed to be bought on this day. Merry Christmas everyone!
On a personal note. This post took two weeks- augh-
- c
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Learning you by heart (8/?)
I'm gonna be posting a bit more frequently from now on! :)
Chapter 7: The Grinch at the Christmas market
Natasha held you in her embrace as you leaned into her side, her hand in your hair, playing with the messy locks that she herself had tousled up. It was silent around you, the TV volume at the lowest possible level so that it wouldn’t disturb your sleeping form that was curled up against her. Natasha looked around the decorated living room, the movie playing in front of her failing to maintain her interests. The Christmas lights created a dark golden glow into the house, the warmth of your body and the lingering smell of cookies providing Natasha with everything she might have needed to relax, but she couldn’t. Not when you were in her arms, her overheated mind whirring like the machinery of a busy factory. She didn’t know what she was doing. She was already in love with you. She had been in love with you from the moment she had seen you despite knowing that you weren’t the person she had once married. However, she couldn’t ignore the similarities either. You were still the same Y/N. You were still the person she was looking for regardless of any altered minor details. She wanted you desperately because without you she had nothing. She had no one else with her in her new life. She would have to begin from ground zero if she wanted her life to have any kind of meaning. The Avengers didn’t exist, her skill set wasn’t needed in this reality. She desperately wanted to have a purpose, and you just so happened to be it. You were the thing she was chasing, the very reason she now found herself in a strange reality, and as exciting as that was, it was scary. What if things didn’t work out? What if you weren’t meant to be in every reality?
You moved, adjusting yourself in your sleep to burrow closer to Natasha, your face nuzzling more into her breast than her shoulder where it had originally been. She felt a jolt of excitement go through her, her cheeks heating as she tightened her arm around you. It was like old times. It was like past Christmases when you fell asleep in her arms after eating too many snacks and losing to the battle of keeping your eyelids open. It was everything that Natasha had been looking for, everything that her soul had been craving for ever since your passing. She closed her eyes, dispelling every confusing, ethically concerned thought from her head to focus fully on your soft and warm body against hers, the smell of your perfume that sometimes reached her nose, and the quiet breathing that warmed up the fabric of her shirt with every puff.
Natasha didn’t sleep much, but she did manage to drift in and out of sleep during the early morning hours when her racing brain was finally worn down enough to stop functioning. She was nonetheless very thankful for the dreamless sleep that she had managed to get when she blinked open her eyes, immediately recognizing the weight that was pressed up against her body. She was horizontally on the couch, your legs tangled up with hers, your face pressed into her side, your hand on chest, right over the lower set of ribs. She couldn’t help but smile, her grin facing the ceiling as she stroked her hand over your head. The feeling of joy in her heart was so overwhelmingly wonderful that all she could do was close her eyes and enjoy the feel of your body touching her own, your head resting against her side. She didn’t know how you had ended up in such a position during the night, but she did not care in the slightest. She had not been as happy since all the trauma she had gone through.
You responded to her movement, starting to stir awake from your slumber, your face heating furiously as you slowly came to and realized that you were nuzzling your face into something other than a pillow. You were between her and the couch, your body on its side, leg draped over her thigh, your hand gripping her front like you were clutching a pillow —something you had always done as a habit ever since your toddler years. Only this time your pillow was something else, someone else.
“Oh, my god”, you whispered under your breath as you slowly pulled away, realizing that your fingertips had been way too close to groping her breast, a delicious warmth pooling in Natasha’s lower abdomen at the rasp in your voice. You caught her gaze by accident after intending to discreetly escape the situation. Instead of witnessing a look of disgust or disapproval, she simply smiled at you.
“Shh, malyshka (baby).” She kept you close to her by rubbing her hand over your arm, prompting you to still. She didn’t want you to waste a second on feeling embarrassed when your cuddles were all that she could ever need. “Did you sleep well?” She sank her hand into your hair, scratching your scalp gently, her heart bursting with happiness to see the way your eyes fluttered shut on their own. It was amusing that you couldn’t seem to escape your mannerisms even across realities. How could you not melt into her when she spoke to you so sweetly, and touched you so delicately, yet so firmly?
“Yes”, you sighed, allowing your head to droop down, resting your forehead against her abdomen. You were still all too groggy to really function, the thrill you got from Natasha’s attention only adding fuel to the fire. You felt like melting into her. “Did you?”
“I slept amazing.” It was true. She couldn’t have felt better even if she had tried to because you were quickly filling up the dark abyss, the black hole that her heart had become.
“I’m sorry if I was a little… handsy.” Your word choice made her laugh.
“More than alright, darling.” She stroked her hands over the back of your head. “I like a handsy woman.” Your cheeks felt warmer once again.
“Me too”, you whispered. You looked at each other, feeling a sense of shyness build up between you. It was so obvious that you liked each other, yet you were still nervous to make advances. It was exciting but slightly nerve-racking to be so close to her and breach the barriers of intimacy that normally existed between new acquaintances. There was so much you wanted from her, so much you wanted to do with her, but she made you feel a childish kind of thrill that knocked down your confidence. You wanted her to like you because you liked her, and that made you flustered. You gave her a small smile, one that came off coy before allowing yourself the pleasure to lower yourself back down onto the couch when she started rubbing your back with her hand, both of you able to enjoy the physical connection better knowing it was welcomed by both parties. You yawned heavily, hiding your face against her to cover up your rather obvious sign of exhaustion.
“Go back to sleep. You still have, what, half the day until you need to be on the stage again.” You mumbled something in response. Natasha smiled to herself. You had always been a sleepy one.
“I wanted to go to the Christmas market with you today.” Your breath warmed up Natasha’s side as you spoke.
“Christmas market?” She frowned in mild confusion, tilting her chin down to see you. “The Grinch going to the Christmas market. I better warn them ahead”, she mused playfully, earning a small slap from you.
“I’m not the Grinch.”
“Alright, Grinch. We’ll go to the Christmas market. I’ll wake you in thirty.” You nodded your head against her side, your body falling limp in a heartbeat. Natasha had always been rather jealous of your ability to sleep anywhere and everywhere. One place where you were almost impossible to keep awake at was her embrace. It made Natasha almost laugh out loud when she recalled a time you had both made an agreement not to cuddle during movies so that you would stay awake to see the end of it. The cuddling ban had never worked. It had only made you clingier, resulting in a tension that stole all your focus away from the movie. The weight of your body on hers felt right. It felt like it belonged there. It grounded Natasha in the new reality that she was to make her home. She brought her hand back into your hair, playing with the locks, twirling them between her fingers before moving on to drawing circles into your back as she thought about her predicament, her previous life, and all the little moments she had shared with you, feeling just a little better than she had at night.
Fifteen minutes into you catching up on sleep, the front door to the brownstone opened and closed, letting Wanda in from her night out in the city. The disheveled appearance of your roommate brought a small smirk to Natasha’s lips, but other than that she did not react, wishing to let Wanda choose whether to approach her or not. Wanda set her bag down and took off her scarf and coat to hang them up on the coat rack. It took her a second before she noticed you and Natasha on the couch, a small smile finding her face, but it was quickly wiped away when her gaze met Natasha’s. Wanda came slowly into the living room, as if hesitantly, making sure to walk quietly to avoid disturbing you. She and Natasha looked at each other, Wanda’s calculating eyes never easing up on Natasha.
“You’re not from here, are you?” It was rather straightforward, but Natasha had also expected it. She had recognized the look of suspicion and doubt on Wanda’s face upon first meeting her. You might not have actually believed Wanda to be a psychic, but Natasha had no doubt about the validity of that information, yet she wanted to keep her past concealed and try her best not to involve you or Wanda, or anyone for that matter, in any of it. “Don’t lie.” Natasha was taken aback by Wanda’s firm tone. It was as if she had been inside of Natasha’s head to see her construct a credible lie. Natasha gave up, knowing there was no way around Wanda.
“No, I’m not from here.” Natasha shook her head in emphasis. Somehow, they seemed to both know that here entailed that there was some other place, a place that the average person was incapable of reaching.
“I can tell you mean no harm”, Wanda continued, her eyes moving down to your sleeping figure. “But whatever baggage you come with, whatever brought you here, don’t involve her in it.” Natasha’s face was contorted into a sad frown as she looked down at your relaxed features.
“It’s too late.” Wanda looked away, pursing her lips as if in defeat, nodding in understanding, the gesture exuding disappointment. There was a brief silence that took over, both women contemplating what Natasha’s presence entailed. Wanda was just about to leave the living room when Natasha spoke.
“Do you know about it all?” Natasha couldn’t help but to ask since the topic had already been brought up for discussion. “About what happened?”
“No, but I know that this isn’t the only reality I exist in. And the same goes for you and her.” The look on Wanda’s face seemed to convey that the pieces weren’t hard for her to put together. “Keep her out of the multiverse. I mean it. Her life is good here.”
“I know it is. I don’t want to take her away from it. I want to be a part of it.” Natasha could see from Wanda’s face that she understood where Natasha was coming from. It was almost like she could feel just a fraction of her pain, but her attitude did not mirror it.
“You’re not from here.” The words seemed to speak for themselves. Natasha wasn’t welcome. “If you hurt her, I will make sure that whatever this is, ends.” She pointed at you and her, an earnest look on her face. “You do not get to pick and choose what you want from each reality. You should stick to what you got.”
“It was your idea”, Natasha shot back, displeased by Wanda’s stubbornness. “You brought me here. I cannot leave.”
“I’m…” Wanda sighed heavily as if frustrated with the misbehaving versions of herself from other realities. She remained quiet and in thought for a moment. “What I said still stands. I need some time to… think.” Wanda backed away from the living room, clearly still gathering herself from her night out. Hopefully Natasha was reading Wanda’s tone right and she had just amended at least a part of herself to Wanda.
“How was Monica?” Natasha asked in a slightly teasing tone before Wanda could leave.
“Shut up.” Wanda rolled her eyes, clearly trying to dislike Natasha to the best of her abilities, but Wanda walked up the stairs with a foolish grin on her face. Maybe there was still a chance of persuading Wanda. It couldn’t have been that hard. Especially since she seemed to have an understanding of the multiverse. Doing her best to keep the recent conversation with Wanda off her mind, she focused back on you, deciding to savor every last second she had with you before you would be up and about, out of her reach, at least cuddle-wise.
“Good morning, detka (baby). Time to wake up”, she hummed in her low voice, rubbing your arm and back a little more aggressively to wake you up. She had already taken an extra five minutes with you for herself. You blinked your eyes open, registering the even thud of her heart right beside your head. It was a low, rich sound that felt oddly comforting so close to your ear. You let out a long sigh, preparing yourself to get up and seize the day.
“Mmh, come on, darling.” The endearment brought a warmth to your chest, the jolt of excitement that went through you enough to make you want to get up. You had half a day to spend with her.
“I’m up”, you whined, dragging yourself upright to bring your groggy face and messy hair into her view. She smiled brighter than you had possibly ever seen her smile, her hand coming up to cup your cheek before attempting to tame some of your hair. You got up and headed straight for the bathroom to make sure you looked and smelled presentable, giving Natasha the opportunity to do the same. Not that she wasn’t already overly comfortable with you. She came into the kitchen five minutes after you to watch you make coffee as she sat at the dinner table with her chin in the palm of her hand, admiring you rather unabashedly. You glanced at her, feeling your cheeks warm up from the look on her face, immediately recalling the kisses, the cuddles, the words she had said the previous night.
“What do you wanna eat?” Natasha eyed you for a moment longer before responding.
“I’ll eat anything. Whatever you have.” You noticed the way her eyes lingered on your fluffy robe that you had changed into to get a little more comfortable for the morning. “Cute.” She didn’t elaborate, simply smiled again as she got up from the table to come help you with breakfast.
“We have all the basics.”
“I’m good with coffee and some bread”, Natasha hummed, spotting a loaf of bread that peeked from a bag Wanda had tossed onto the counter after work. Natasha moved behind you, her hand brushing over your shoulder as she kissed your hair, gently moving you out of the way to grab the bread. You could barely breathe after that, dumbly staring ahead at the pot of coffee that you were holding in your hand, ready to pour into a mug for her.
“W-Wanda’s bread is really good.” How dumb of you to try to stutter anything when you felt like you suddenly knew what the physical feeling of love felt like.
“I would love to visit her bakery someday.” She simply carried on with the conversation, her hand brushing down your back over the fluffy robe. “Thank you for the coffee, detka (baby).” Her voice was velvety smooth when she spoke so close to you, the tone low and intimate. You looked down at your hands to realize you had indeed poured her a cup before handing it to her.
You didn’t really think about what you did next, not that you could have made your brain function anyway, pressing your lips on hers in a hasty, sort of clumsy kiss that you definitely were embarrassed by, but Natasha welcomed it with open arms. You pulled away quickly after realizing how sudden and awkward the kiss had been, but Natasha simply let out a quiet chuckle as she opened her eyes to see you. She noted how flustered you looked, but she did not seem to feel the same way, her smile only widening as she set the cup of coffee back down on the counter and took a step closer to you to erase the gap between you. She brought her hand up to your cheek, leaning in for another kiss as if to properly give you what you had been looking for. Her lips connected with your own, gently at first, simply allowing you to feel their softness and warmth. You melted into her, your hands finding her waist, body leaning into her embrace as your cheeks heated up. That’s when she deepened the kiss, her tongue slipping past your lips to meet your own, turning your knees into jelly with that single action. Your heart began to flutter, your lips parting wider for more of the dizzying touch of her tongue, but she pulled away. She admired your flushed expression for a moment as you waited with bated breath for more, her thumb caressing your lower lip briefly before grabbing her mug of coffee.
“I won’t bite, baby.” She gave you a teasing smirk as if to tell you to keep up your brave advances before returning to the table with her coffee and bread to cut a few slices for you both. You grabbed the edge of the kitchen counter for support, putting conscious effort into not squeezing your thighs together. You let out a small, awkward chuckle hiding your face by going to the fridge to cool off and find toppings for the bread. You loaded the table with butter, jams, spreads, ham, cheese and anything else one might have wanted on top of bread before toasting a few of the slices of leftover sourdough she had cut for you. Finally, after finding plates and cutlery, you took a seat opposite of Natasha as she was smearing butter over a slice of crispy bread, watching the spread melt and seep into the bread. You grabbed a slice for yourself, selecting your favorite toppings to go with it.
“So, what’s at the Christmas market?” Natasha asked in curiosity, taking a bite of her butter and jam toast.
“Nothing. I’ve just never been.” You omitted the fact that you wanted to please her by choosing Christmas themed activities for you to do.
“Really? Did you have one in mind?” She took a sip of her steaming coffee, those emerald eyes observing you carefully. She looked beautiful in the golden, morning sunlight that made her pale skin glow and her auburn hair shine.
“The Bryant Park Christmas village. I saw something about it a while back.” You moved your leg as you got more comfortable on the dinner table chair, your fluffy-sock-covered foot touching hers beneath the table. Just that small bit of contact made your cheeks warm, the effect intensifying when her eyes met yours. She allowed her foot to stroke yours, a small smile finding her lips. She had a matching pair of socks that you had lended her after you had both frozen your toes off on the front steps the previous night.
“I haven’t been this year either.” Her touch was gentle, her fluffy sock softening the contact. You saw the slight blush on her cheeks, her smile deepening alongside the tension between you. You took a bite of your toast to distract yourself, but it did nothing to alleviate the butterflies in your abdomen. You moved your foot up her calf, hiding behind your mug of coffee. You continued your silent conversation beneath the table as you ate, sharing shy glances and smiles with each other as your fluffy-socked feet danced around each other.
•••
The decorations were gorgeous in the Bryant Park winter village, all the bright lights and baubles around you creating an overwhelmingly festive atmosphere around you. Natasha’s hand found your lower back to guide you in front of her to get through the concentration of people in front of you, her hand returning into your own after you had passed through the crowd. You looked around you, marveling at the lively energy of the people, Christmas music blasting everywhere. It was definitely something you had not quite expected from a marketplace. You had expected it to be rather mundane, but you had been oh-so wrong. There was so much to see that it was downright baffling. There was a carousel, booths upon booths of food, decorations, and other types of handcrafted goods that made your jaw drop from how beautiful they were. There were cookies, candy, drinks, donuts, cakes, chocolate, savory food options beyond measure, even performances. You had never realized how huge the winter village was. You had never known what you had been missing out on. Natasha gave you a knowing smirk as you walked through the narrow aisles, admiring all the decorations, smelling all the delicious scents around you, simply doing your best to take in as much as possible to savor the thrilling experience.
“I wonder where people got those hot chocolates from”, you hummed quietly, Natasha leaning a bit closer to you to hear you better.
“Does the Grinch want a Christmas treat?” She asked in a teasing retort that made you punch her in the arm. She laughed unabashedly.
“I’m not the Grinch. I just want hot chocolate. Did you see they put a toasted marshmallow on top?” You turned to look at her, your gleaming eyes laced with excitement.
“I did see.” She nodded her head, glancing around her, soon spotting the booth that had a small line to it, people who exited the stand leaving with mugs topped with marshmallow. “This way, darling”, she hummed, her hands guiding you into the right direction. Every time she found an excuse to touch you, you felt your heart jolt in your chest from excitement, purposefully lingering close to her just so you could be near her as much as possible. You found it incredibly endearing that she liked giving your lower back an unnecessary stroke when you took a turn or entered a shop. It felt oddly intimate and caring. You came to a stop in front of the booth, eyeing the options available.
“It’s so big. It’s probably gonna be too sweet”, you lamented, but before you even managed to quite finish your sentence, Natasha was on it.
“I’ll share it with you.” She turned to look at you, your smile only widening.
You continued to walk around the village, sharing the marshmallow-loaded hot chocolate between you as you went from booth to booth, admiring the Christmas ornaments on display before buying a few treats to take home for the evening. After the hot chocolate was gone Natasha managed to coax you to ride the carousel. You sat side by side on two separate horses that bounced up and down as the carousels spun around at a moderate pace. You looked at Natasha, unable to tear your eyes away from her as she went gently up and down in your vision, the carousel music filling up the silence as you just looked at Natasha’s gorgeous face, the lights and the spinning sights of the market flashing by behind her. You had no words for her beauty, no words for the feeling inside you. There was nothing you could say, nothing you could think because all your attention was consumed by Natasha’s ethereal being.
“What?” She asked quietly, just loudly enough for you to hear over the music.
“You look angelic.” It was the honest truth. There was no way around it. She smiled, her jade eyes escaping your reach as she looked away, her reddened cheeks seeming to get just a shade darker. She didn’t respond, but she didn’t have to. Her blush spoke for itself. By the end of your tour around the marketplace, you ended up at the root of a giant Christmas tree. You and Natasha stared up at it in awe, taking in the magnificent sight before you. It was almost too beautiful to be true. Your eyes went from one red bauble to another, the lights, the golden ornaments giving you enough to look to last the whole day. You backed away slightly to be able to see the large star at the very top of the tree, feeling so small beside the incredible sight before you.
“I love the golden bauble garland”, you commented softly, watching how said decorations wrapped around the entire tree.
“Me too. And the snowflakes”, she hummed, tearing her gaze away from the tree to look at you. Your eyes met, a small smile finding your lips as you turned to face her, recalling her comment from breakfast. Your kisses were welcome. She would not bite you. Her smile only widened when your eyes dipped down to her lips, a sudden excitement bubbling between you at the thought of kissing the other.
You let out a small chuckle as you leaned in, wishing to make the moment by the tree even more significant and more memorable. Your lips pressed together, her warm mouth welcoming you into a slow and sensual kiss that allowed you to feel every movement of her lips as she carefully sucked on your bottom lip. You kissed a few times, your lips parting just enough to only fit her lip between your own. The kiss stayed gentle, Natasha’s lips spreading into a wide grin that made it hard for her to kiss you back. She giggled quietly, a sound that tickled your ear in the most pleasant way possible. You pulled back to look at her, failing to contain your own grin as you just looked at each other, her hands reaching for your waist to bring you closer to her body. You glanced at the sublime tree beside you, Natasha’s eyes following your line of sight before you faced each other again, managing to wipe off your silly grins to be able to kiss each other again. She gripped your waist firmly enough for you to feel it through your coat, your mouths pressing together once more, her tongue pushing up against your lips in a dizzying caress that made your stomach lurch from arousal.
You had to pull away, the thoughts that flashed through your mind all too risky for the public, a sheepish smile lingering on your lips as you looked Natasha in the eye, your hips burning with such fervent need for more as they pressed gently up against hers. She had a smug, little smirk on her face as if she would have known exactly why you had pulled away, as if she had noticed something specific you did that gave your predicament away. You pursed your lips, trying to wipe off the smile from your face, but you didn’t quite manage as the heat inside you spread all over your body, Natasha pressing a final kiss to your forehead before pulling you away from the tree to go back to the final booths of decorations before you would inevitably have to leave so that you could head to work on time.
“Somehow we always end up doing Christmas related things”, Natasha commented casually as you once again strolled through the booths, this time toward the exit. “Does that bother the Grinch?” You rolled your eyes, nudging her a little.
“Actually no.” You chuckled when she nudged you back, nearly making you stumble over your feet. “Because I’m not the Grinch. It’s just Christmas. It’s nothing special.”
“You say that now…” Natasha hummed ominously, knowing full well that there was a little Christmas elf inside you that was just waiting to be let out of her cage.
“Why are you so adamant about me liking Christmas?”
“I’m not.” You gave her a look. “Seriously. You just seem the type to enjoy pointless traditions.” You couldn’t do anything but giggle, she was such a tease. You walked to the end of the aisle of booths, one of the stands catching your eye right before you were to exit the village. Your eyes remained glued on the beautiful ornament that hung from the ceiling of the booth among a wide variety of unique baubles. Your attention was stuck on a bright red glass ball that had golden carvings all around it. The thin gold lines were detailed and curved beautifully around the ornament, but they also left a good amount of the glass bare which allowed you to see through the ball when the booth’s lights hit it just right. It made the glass glow blood red, the effect reminding you vaguely of the way sunlight reflected from Natasha’s hair.
“What is it?” You had gone quiet, prompting Natasha’s to figure out what had derailed your conversation.
“N… nothing”, you mumbled as you took slow steps forward, intending to leave the beautiful decoration behind because you really did not need it, but Natasha knew that look in your eyes. She steered you right to the vendor as if by accident, focusing on all the other decorations while you stared up at your red glass ball. After a while of you admiring the ornament, Natasha came to your side.
“You should buy it.” You glanced at her as if to check if she was seeing what you were seeing.
“Maybe for Wanda. She would love it.” You could buy it for Wanda so that you could take it home and look at it all you wanted. It made more sense than buying it for yourself since you didn’t celebrate Christmas.
“Yeah, for Wanda”, Natasha said in a slightly mockery tone that slipped by you. It was so obvious that if you were going to buy it, you would never end up giving it to Wanda. Your eyes were practically gleaming with desire.
“You wanna take it down?” The vendor-man asked you after deciding to seize the opportunity to make another sale for the day. Natasha nodded her head before you could even answer. You felt a bit dumbfounded, like you were wasting everyone’s time, but when the vendor placed the stark red ball into your hands you felt yourself relent.
“I’ll get it for Wanda.”
“For Wanda.” Natasha nodded solemnly, biting back her smile as you bought the ornament, paying for it as the vendor wrapped it up and placed it into a paper bag. You said your goodbyes and exited the winter village right after. You were planning on taking a thirty-minute walk to the Metropolitan Opera House where you would part ways.
You walked through the city hand in hand, chatting casually about your impressions of the marketplace as you made your way north, navigating your way toward Lincoln Square by memory, all too familiar with Manhattan to need any kind of directions. Natasha’s heart felt light as she watched your hands swing back and forth between you. She was beyond pleased to be holding your hand, her smile seeming to linger on her lips no matter how much she tried to keep her features neutral to appear at least somewhat normal, but she couldn’t deny the excitement, the joy and the thrill she felt. She was falling in love with you all over again. She was relearning what –or rather whom– she had once known by heart, and it was better than she had anticipated. It felt more right than she had imagined. You felt like you, and she felt like herself. All seemed to be right in the world, or at least whenever you two were in your own little bubble of Christmas nonsense. She thought about your kiss by the Christmas tree, her mind wandering as you talked about the variety of cuisine available at the market, planning on having lunch there someday. Natasha felt her knees give in at the mere thought of the kiss. Your lips were so delicious, so irresistible that it took everything in her not to kiss you harder, deeper, and for longer. She glanced at your face, a slight, adoring frown appearing on her own at the look on your face as you brought up a few booths you would want to give a try. Her gaze moved down to your lips and then it moved away from them when she felt a visceral reaction somewhere south of her abdomen.
Over half an hour later, to your utter dismay, you reached the Metropolitan Opera House, despite your efforts at slowing down your walking pace. You didn’t want to part from Natasha. You really did not. The last thing you wanted to do was to get on stage and sing when you had something much more prevalent on your mind, or rather someone. But alas, you had no choice. You needed to show up at work because the entire production was counting on your appearance. You both paused by the front doors where you had seen her exit what felt like an eternity ago.
“I kind of don’t want to go in”, you admitted, looking down at your joint hands, reluctant to let go.
“Yeah”, Natasha echoed quietly, meeting your gaze, offering you an assuring smile. You were clearly on the same page, your bashful smiles mirroring each other. Maybe you could prolong your little date for just a tiny bit longer.
“Would you wanna come in for some vocal warmups?” Your tone was hopeful, her brow arching up almost playfully.
“Vocal warmups, you say?” There was a hint of suggestiveness there, the ridiculous innuendo failing to slip by you as you shoved her gently toward the entrance door, ignoring the ripples of electricity that the thought of all the sounds she could elicit from you crossed your mind.
“Shut up.” You let out a long laugh, following her inside the building.
#natasha romanoff#natasha x reader#ao3#kinktober#lesbian#eventual smut#marvel cinematic universe#romance#sapphic#winter aesthetic#snow#cold#winter wonderland#snowflakes#winter#holiday#merry christmas#merry xmas#holidays#holiday season#christmas#xmas#christmas tree#festive#marketplace#new york#new york city#central park#manhattan#hurt/comfort
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Day 82
Another one that I love!~ Gonna be a lot of those from here on if you couldn’t tell!
Junko’s the Ultimate Fashionista (in the english release at least but hey Ultimate Gyaru has to have a little crossover right??), so of course she handles Mikan’s wardrobe the moment she’s allowed to. So . . . Extremely cute scene of her having Mikan try out clothes to see what she does and doesn’t like.
An opportunity for Junko to pamper Mikan, AND i get to draw Mikan in a sweater???? Heaven. Also like are we all in agreement that sweaters just look fuckin amazing on Mikan?? Like I admit, I think I just like drawing Sweaters on Mikan but they just make her look so much cuter because of how god damn cozy she looks in em.
Unfortunately that’s all I have to talk about for that topic? I think? So instead let’s shift over to a recent development involving Junkan!
I’m in the midst of working on the Junkan Christmas Eve comic, which hopefully will be getting posted on time a few days after this, and during the process of making there’s been something new with my current abilities.
I have officially hit the point of proper freehanding on these two.
Y’see this probably won’t make too much sense but i’ll do my best to explain.
So normally when it comes to sketches I’ve done things a bit less proper compared to more professional artists. I usually get a little start on the anatomy, and then just start sketching all the character details and moving out from there. It isn’t often that I do a full sketch for the basic anatomy of a character, I only do it when I really wanna not fuck up a pose. And as you also know up till now only one piece in this event was drawn normally. Everything else is a sketch that i cleaned up and colored, or just a sketch.
This is because generally speaking I can’t do art using my normal pen tool without a sketch to work off of, it requires a lot more finesse to use the G-Pen both because of the larger shifts that can occur in line width, and the slightly looser feel it has compared to my Pencil Tool.
That’s all to say that I have drawn Junko and Mikan so many fucking times that I can just, draw them without proper sketches now. I’m at a point where I just need to draw the head, torso, and legs for an anatomy sketch, and then with the G-Pen I can just, draw from there. That’s big for me personally, and also fucked up because god how even??? There hasn’t been a drop in quality either so far, i’m still able to refine the expressions and i haven’t fucked up with the arms too much yet, I’d even say it’s resulted in some of my favorite Junkos and Mikans period.
Now, the catch is that again, this is only Junko and Mikan. I could prooooobably get to this point with Mukuro eventually just because her design is much simpler compared to other DR Characters? I struggle with getting her colors right rather than linework, but that’s about it and still not really useful in my main line of work unless I memorize every character that’s ever existed, and it took like 150 fucking times for Junkan I can’t do that for an obscure RPG character that I might get commissioned once and then never again.
It’s also not something that I think i’ll apply to my normal Junkan works, because I am a perfectionist to a fault when it comes to pieces I care about and I want to make sure every detail these is exact. I need to be meticulous for ship art like this, every detail is important. And I can maximize that with sketching.
This new skill is basically useful for one thing. Speed.
I pride myself on my efficiency, even if I have waned over the years due to burnout and overwork, when I get into it I can fuckin move with my art. And so if I need to say, make a 28 page comic in under a month? Being able to mostly skip an entire phase of the art process is very, VERY useful, ESPECIALLY because it’s a comic. Something which generally takes more time than my normal art by nature of it’s format and what it involves. When making the Comic for Day 60 it was all sketches, which was equally fast but could leave small imperfections at the time that either went under my radar or I just let slide because i was trying to be efficient.
This is basically perfect for having to speedrun a Junkan comic, it’s all the speed with the usual amount of visual quality.
So in short . . . I’m turning into a nightmarish hell machine but specifically for drawing Junkan. I am genuinely curious how much farther I can go up from here, like, what the hell else could I be capable of with this???? Am I just gonna learn how to fuckin beam the art onto the canvas with my brain???
Moral of the story is just get mind numbingly obsessed with a ship and I guess you’ll get better at stuff??? I have no idea, i’m still kind of processing the comedic value of what this year has been because I was desperate for these two to make out.
As always, Reblogs, Comments, and Little Notes in the Tags are appreciated!~ They always make my day!~
#danganronpa#junkan#junko enoshima#mikan tsumiki#junko x mikan#tsumiki mikan#enoshima junko#enomiki#shipping#junkomikan
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Inside Carnal Knowledge • Part 2
🧵 Outlander_Starz: The cannons include a little nod to Production Designer Mike Gunn and Set Decorator Stuart Bryce. Made originally for the battles in the first half of Season 7, Gunn and Bryce couldn't resist the opportunity to immortalize their names in metal when they were rebuilt for the market in Part 2.
🧵Outlander_Starz: Another Easter Egg: some of the background signs display the names of our hardworking and talented Outlander crew!
Not only are the signs an opportunity for the Art Department to have a bit of fun and feature their names in the show, but it actually helps with legal clearances too, moving them through much faster.
🧵 Outlander_ Starz: Who else was shocked seeing the usually so dignified Lord John battered, bruised, and a little bit unhinged?
To create the effect, David Berry traveled to London to have a mold taken of his face. Then, a prosthetic was made to fit over his eye (which, by the way, cut off his vision). Application took an hour.
"It looks very realistic," said Berry. "So realistic that the amount of sympathy and shock I got from people on set was quite a thing to experience."
🧵Outlander_Starz: I definitely feel for William but can we all agree he was a little bit messy this episode? So was the fight scene location.
Said Charles Vandervaart, "That was such a miserable day in terms of weather. There was so much rain. Lots of mud. I felt really bad for the wardrobe people because every time I would fall over I would just be covered in mud and they'd have to scrub it off for the next take. But it was also such a great day. I'm so fortunate to have great cast mates like Izzy and John."
🧵 Outlander_Starz: The drama continues for William at the brothel, where he meets the intriguing Arabella aka Jane.
For the screen, liberties were taken to highlight Silvia Presente's beautiful hair. Said Hair and Makeup Designer Ann McEwan, "Silvia's hair is gorgeous. Everyone was really happy with it... The producers wanted her hair down, which wasn't common for the time, but it suited the part and suited her."
🧵 Outlander_Starz: As for the brothel space, Production Designer Mike Gunn and Set Decorator Stuart Bryce opted for a dark, simple color palette, electing instead to build color and texture through textiles, props, and an abundance of flowers.
Conceptually, we just kept adding more and more. If you look closely, there are different layers of time within everything we put in that room.
There's some really ragtag, tatty looking stuff. There's some stuff that looks quite crisp and sharp.
The same goes for the flowers in the floral displays. We tried to make a visual feast of dark with pops of color everywhere. — STUART BRYCE, SET DECORATOR
🧵Outlander_Threads: In this episode, Jamie Fraser is reacquainted with the one and only George Washington, who bestows upon him a great honor: a promotion to Brigadier General.
Though WE of course know Jamie Fraser as the King of Men, the writers put a lot of thought into making sure his ascent up the ranks this season felt earned. I'm just glad the future President of the United States now sees Jamie the way that we do.
We've always shown Jamie as a revered leader... whether it be his guys at Prestonpans and Culloden-his Scottish guys that know he's a great leader-or his guys from the Ridge-his Ardsmuir guys that would follow him anywhere-he's always been the top dog. But now that he goes north and joins the revolutionary cause... he's kind of a nobody. He's in a much bigger army now...
We crafted it very purposefully to start him small as just one of the guys making suggestions but turning out to be right. Little by little, he proves himself... He becomes this leader to where finally, George Washington recognizes his talent and skill and makes him a general. — TONI GRAPHIA, EXECUTIVE PRODUCER & WRITER
Threads 🧵
Inside Carnal Knowledge • Part 2 of 2
Remember… some of the background signs display the names of our hardworking and talented Outlander crew.
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So, ah, it's been a while; but this will be finishing it off, for this year.
THE ANTARCTIC: A Fangame? by @ringedretrospective I am genuinely curious if this IS a fangame OF something; and if so, what, because "penguins fighting against angels in the long day, and other penguins in the long night", sounds RAD AS HELL.
Core Competence by @rathayibacter I always like "pick a beneficial trait, and take the detrimental trait which comes along with it", and that's like the base concept of this whole thing. It'd benefit from some examples -- ideally a wide range of skills and their corresponding restrictions to choose from -- but that's what you get with a 200-word limit (and also "coming up with good examples of stuff" is hard work).
Dagobert et Saint-Eloi by @bossarmadimon It's things like this which make me glad I can read French at a functional level. I highly respect the mindset of "doing it because someone said it was impossible", plus the game itself seems like fun. I'm probably missing a LOT of the context, since my exposure to francophone culture consists of two non-sequential months spent in Quebec in the mid-late 00s.
Destiny: Keep Dusk by @notsomeoneyouknow I already liked this just from the title; I've a weakness for things that are just synonyms of what they're based on. I love the concept of picking a Summons by just getting a random wikipedia article. Everything else feels like it would be hilarious if I knew more about Fate Stay Night.
Earth, Sun and Rain Grow a Plant by @cornishpatsy I just really like the bit about how it works out to okay if there's two much of two different specific things, because it balances out.
Expert Professional Liars by @souridealist I appreciate something that starts with "here's a weird thing to use as a randomizer" and then continues to "what type of thing would most fit with the results pattern given by this".
from nothingness by @kalinary That's something I don't think I've seen before, where everyone gets randomly assigned a trait and THEN only one person gets to keep it, I'm assuming here that it's their "true" trait and not something they were just "acting as" in the moment, going by "best embodied". I always love coming across new shiny concepts.
I'm an English Major, Not a Scientist! by @coopbella This concept amuses me. Like, I always love "everyone is secretly an X pretending to be a Y, and they think everyone else is actually a Y", but "librarians on a submarine" is great.
Interlocked Fates by @thefaewriter I respect the idea of having a bunch of games all together, which are all linked. But more than that, I like all the "again" in the vampire one; you can TASTE the frustration and annoyance with those damn vampires, and I love it. The rest of the stuff seems pretty good too.
AN INTIMATE INTERPLAY OF SWORDSMANSHIP ATOP A SUNLIT PEAK by @seth-a-nahk I really like that dice mechanic here. That's… not much to say, but there's not much TO say; it's not like I write a poem extolling the virtues of baked goods every time I eat a cookie, even a really yummy cookie.
Naive Rules to Argumentative Fantastical Play by @meticulac From the notes about this, it seems really cool; I love the concept. From the text of the game itself, however, that… wasn't so clear. This is another of those games that would really benefit from some more words; this one in particular, I want to read a version of it done WITHOUT a word-count limit, because some ideas simply can't be compressed beyond a certain degree without losing what makes them worthwhile (compare the album art done for vinyl records, vs the album art done for things that will play online and it'll mostly be seen in thumbnail), and I don't know what its "full proper size" would be.
On God's Desk By End Of Days by @krawkpaladin There were a bunch of things posted on the last day of this event with the theme of "oh frick it's nigh the deadline and stuff still needs to get done" (for obvious reasons). This one though actually feels like its own game, prolly due to the setting/concept (which is cool).
Prototypes by @derpravener I do not care about mech stuff; I don't HATE it, I just don't find it intrinsically cool. That being said, I like this, with the different options it has available to choose from.
Quaint Seaside Town Stuck In A Time Loop by @believerindaydreams Gotta say, "changing up who you are and what your role is" WORKS for a "stuck in a time loop" situation, can't believe I'd never seen that before. (One thing I need to point out, though: d66 means "roll a d6 for the ones place, and a d6 for the tens place", and leads to a total of 36 possible results, not 66.)
Secret Agents of the 60s by @wrrdbrrd I can't articulate what exactly I like about this, but I like it.
Sneaky Snack by @blueberrybananasmoothie This is simply DELIGHTFUL, large smile on my face.
TANGERRITORIAL by @certified-llama-chauffeur I'm just impressed that someone managed to figure out a way to make a TANGERINE part of a game. And the whole thing seems pretty functional, which… isn't a given for this event, and ESPECIALLY isn't a given for weird gimmicky stuff.
!(Zombie Apocalypse) ? Proceed As Usual : CYOA by @that-house I fucking hate Choose Your Own Adventure stories, and I have ever since I was a child; it doesn't matter the quality, I just hate the whole genre or medium or whatever it counts as. Still, I have to respect someone who manages to a) write this and b) get it all within the wordcount.
So that's it for the stuff from this event; I've talked about all the ones I found interesting enough to talk about. If I've mentioned one of your games on here or on the previous thread, and you want further feedback on it, feel free to hit me up. If you have a game I didn't talk about here... I can still give you feedback if you wish, I just likely won't have much to say and/or a decent chunk of it would be criticism, but it's your choice.
Continuation from my previous thread (because it got long), of stuff from @200-word-rpgs that I find interesting.
THE CURSE: A Rabbit and Steel Fangame by @ringedretrospective I'm not sure I've even HEARD of "Rabbit and Steel" before, let alone know what it's like. But having "apologize for what you did last night", as the single sentence for the "day" phase, amuses me greatly.
Make Brown by @thee-rat-king I like colour stuff; I also appreciate how "should or shouldn't end up brown" is a 50% thing determined at the start of the game. And that's just SUCH a cool concept, how one player gets their colour combined with that of the other.
Paleolithic Fantasy by @cavetalesz I agree with the writer (whose url is PERFECTLY fitted for this game), we need more stuff set in this… setting. And also more FANTASY stuff in that setting; heck, if we're going from the thing we commonly see in fantasy of "magic has been fading from the world", then the earlier back we go, the more room there is for magic (and also it's not like there's any written documentation to contradict it). As to the game itself, I appreciate how the "stuff you find" table includes entries with relevant stats, and then at the end there's just "the antlered man", no detail given.
Elegy For A Better Yesterday by @notsomeoneyouknow I don't have enough familiarity with John Woo movies to properly appreciate this. But from the design notes, it seems like a lot of thought went into mechanics that properly match the theme.
Mires by @i-exist-for-spleen and manguypersondude I appreciate something that, as they put it, turns "how partial a GM is inevitably going to be" into a feature and not a bug. Also, something that started with a design requirement ("no dice math") and then built from there. And yeah, when you just stumble upon a theme or concept that ties everything neatly together, that is SUCH a good feeling; the spark of inspiration that lights up the tinder you've prepared from your own efforts.
You Know How This Story Ends by @indraklyr I just think it's cool; everyone has things that will happen, then those things get placed in an order, then you play out how the things happen.
You Sunk My Battleship! by @ineffable-gallimaufry Gotta respect something that finds a way to turn BATTLESHIP, of all things, into an RPG.
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the more we learn about silver and its place in elderling society the more insane it is how much fitz and the fool just fuck around and find out with it
#kestrel was right all along.#oops.#i kind of expected the elderlings to be chill about it you know and you just have to be trained#you know like everything else with the skill#once thymara was explaining amarindas dragon hide gauntlets i was like. yeah so the fools just really fucking lucky huh#cant wait for them to meet the elderlings and for the elderlings to find out abt their incredibly liberal use of it#rote liveblog#estarriol mute this#thymara hears abt the fool just randomly touching shit with it and starts vibrating
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My mom (and my sister) said that both baby Stan and Ford are adorable but Ford is cuter and she likes him better and I think my heart is shattered.
This post is dedicated to my favorite kid Stanley panels:
My mom didn’t even like him when I showed the one where he murders those two kids 😭😭😭 that’s the best part!!!
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stanford pines#I just wanna hold him and tell him he’s wonderful and creative and amazing#he’s trying his best#hes just a baby HES JUST A BABY#she doesn’t like that he’s a con man but MAYBE he wouldn’t have become a con man if he had a better support group 😤😤😤#I mean c’mon this kid had practically NO ONE#the only one there for him was his brother#and he was always over shadowed by his brother#everything he did in comparison wasn’t enough#and so yeah he takes shortcuts to catch up and then all he knows to do is lie and cheat because anything else he tried to do got shot down#HE WANTED TO DRAW COMICS DAMNIT#and really he was also pretty skilled in crafting! like foot bot and the boat he built with his brother#he probably just didn’t realize that that was impressive because of course it wasn’t his brother was doing things ten times cooler#YOU GUYS WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND HIM THE WAY I DO#😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#AND THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH MY CHILDHOOD#WHERE I WAS *ALSO* OVER SHADOWED BY MY SIBLING AND FELT THAT I WAS NEVER GOOD ENOUGH#AND I’D GET IN TROUBLE FOR SHIT I DIDNT DO#AND WAS CONSIDERED THE SCREW UP#THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT.#SHUT UP.
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