#you don't have to read this but I'm going through an... interesting time

[starry-on-ao3]

Okay but this is actually a perfect metaphor for-

Hold on

*scramble to get a projector screen and flashcards*

*clears throat*

One of the best pieces of writing advice I've seen recently that really helped me with my current WIPs is to just go ahead and write The Perfect Scene in the middle, and figure the rest out later!! Break free of the myth that you must write in a linear fashion!! Yes you must eventually fill in the bits before and after The Perfect Scene, so that the readers understand whatever wild and wacky journey you're bringing them on, but it shouldn't be a slog to get there - by the time you get there, you'll have muddled through the before bits and struggled so much you'll either resent the fic and give up, or The Perfect Scene won't live up to your ridiculously high expectations because of how long it took you to get there.

✨For example ✨

the current WIP I'm working on I'm estimating will have 25-30 chapters (and probably an epilogue). I have written as far as chapter 10 and have posted as far as chapter 4. I am estimating the dramatic resolution of the plot will occur in or around chapter 23-27. That's roughly 13-17 chapters in the future. Now that the holidays are over, and I'm back to work and various other commitments, I have no idea how long it'll take me to get there! It could be weeks or months! So I can't guarantee that I'll have the same enthusiasm for The Perfect Scene in weeks or months from now - and, in case I don't, I may as well partially write it now just as insurance. Even if it's not perfect, I can change it later, and at least I have an ideal to work towards!

More juicy writing advice

Another small piece of advice is to keep a note of the things that inspire you - for me it's song lyrics, which is why many of my pics begin with a playlist. In my tumblr drafts I have two posts where I'm writing a reflection on the writing process for this WIP and for a series which soon will be ending (sadly). Nobody ever necessarily needs to read your reflections, but it helps me to write these reflections as if I was planning on sharing them here, which I may do if there's interest. (but also it's your blog?!! you can do wtf you want with it?!! If you want to write critical reflection of your own work then just do it because I guarantee it will interest other fic authors, I love hearing about other fic authors experiences and writing journeys!)

Anyway hope this helps somebody 🤗🫶

[tanenigiri]

Like several others in the fandom, I'm still recovering from the feels that Chapter 25 of Hirano and Kagiura has given me, especially the scenes that paint Hirano in a rather green and purple light. As someone who only recently came to terms with being aro and acespec, seeing Hirano go through very familiar struggles felt like an out-of-body experience.

It also made me want to revisit some manga that I've read so far that have featured characters in the aro and ace spectrums. Since I mostly consume BL, there understandably haven't been a lot that's come into my radar, but the few I've read have all been great, and I wanted to take this opportunity to give them a shoutout.

I Want to Be a Wall by Honami Shirono - Definitely my favorite in this list and one of my top 5 fave manga overall, this stars an aroace woman and a gay man who get into a marriage of convenience. It deals with expectations from their families and society as a whole about what an ideal marriage should be, but it also spends a lot of time exploring how Yuriko comes to terms with her asexuality and how the people around her react to it, especially her husband Gakurouta - who also deals with his own issues about hiding his homosexuality and his very apparent attraction to another character in the series who's presented as straight. On top of dealing with all these issues very tastefully, it's a great slice-of-life manga with a lot of humor and fluff squeezed in, so if you want a feel-good read with depth and lots of soul, I really recommend this one.

Is Love the Answer? by Uta Isaki - The manga on this list that's most blatantly about aromanticism and asexuality, this explores the story of Chika and her journey to discovering, questioning, and accepting her romantic and sexual orientation. It goes very in-depth into this journey, and it even has multiple other aroacespec characters that she deems as role models, such as a professor who serves as a mentor for Chika and many other characters in the series as well as an older brother figure who had a much rougher time discovering his own asexuality. If you want to read a coming-of-age story where the lead comes to terms with her asexuality much in the same way that many BL and GL manga leads come to terms with their own queer identities, I highly recommend this manga. (Trigger warning for a brief sexual assault scene at the start - it's not graphic, but it definitely shows the attempt, so stray away if a scene like that would unsettle you.)

I Think Our Son Is Gay by Okura - I've talked about this manga before, and in my previous posts I mentioned that my favorite character is Yuri, the brother of the titular son Hiroki. Turns out I was onto something, as throughout the manga, Yuri mentions that while many girls in his school have expressed interest in him, he always turns them down, saying that he doesn't really get why everyone's making such a big deal about love. That already got my attention, but there's a scene in the fifth volume where Yuri actually goes into this more and researches why he's feeling that way, and it leads to a certain label we all know and love. Sadly that fifth volume is also the series's final one, so we don't get any more after that, but it really solidifies Yuri's journey throughout the manga, making for a nice parallel for his mother's own journey about accepting Hiroki's identity.

Our Dreams at Dusk: Shimanami Tasogare by Yuhki Kamatani - I've also talked about this manga before, and just like I Want To Be A Wall, it has pretty much cemented its place in my top 5 fave manga overall. What made me fall in love with this manga is how it explores so many types of queer stories in a very realistic light, dealing with issues like discrimination, family acceptance, and identity crises in a way that really shows how serious they can be. Expectedly, one of the types of queer stories it explores is about Someone who's aroace (whoever's read this manga - yes, that was a pun), though unlike the other characters in this series (and unlike most of the other characters in this post), that character is already at the point of their journey where they're comfortable with their sexual identity. Instead, the author uses Someone-san as a mentor throughout the story, helping other characters come to terms with their own identities and running the safe space that most of the story centers around. If you're looking for manga that's explicitly about the aroace experience, I don't think this would be the one for you, but if you're looking for great queer manga in general, this should be at the top of your list.

Bonus:

Cherry Magic by Yuu Toyota: I can't end this post without talking about queen Fujisaki. In the manga and anime, she takes on the role of a fujoshi who's a big fan of Kurosawa and Adachi's relationship even before they get together. But her role in the Japanese TV series (and movie) was changed, toning down the fangirlism (though hints of it are still there!) and instead giving her a unique storyline, one that eventually reveals to Adachi (though not explicitly) that she isn't interested in dating anyone. There isn't any explicit confirmation about her sexuality beyond this in the show, but there have been interviews from the showrunners where they do mention it. And honestly, as someone who was only starting out with BL at that point, seeing a character like her have that kind of background was already so incredible to me.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I hope you check these manga out, and if you know of other manga with great aroace rep, let me know!

[madamspellmans-met-tet]

🍷Illicit Affairs🍷┃ Ch. 3

Lilia Calderu x fem!reader

wc: ~ 3.2 k

summary: Lilia has a stressful day at work and wants nothing more than to enjoy a hot bubble bath—but she is interrupted.

*******************************************

All of Lilia’s pants had been in the washing this morning, leaving her with no other choice but to wear a pencil skirt that she didn’t dare bend over in for fear it might rip. The new concierge had been paying her enough attention today without the need for a spectacle. Who was she kidding? She would’ve laughed her pretty ass off if it would’ve happened. 

She drove home through the dense autumn fog after her shift and nearly ran into an unfortunately positioned trash can, but after a day of yelling at people to get their shit together because the hotel inspectors were bound to show up any day now as they did every year, she didn’t have an ounce of energy left to work herself up about it. Her scalp ached from a day of wearing her hair tightly pinned up, even now that she’d tugged it loose. 

In her driveway, she left the car without her parka but regretted it as soon as she'd stepped out. She was plucking the house keys from her bag when the front door opened. Alice came out with her hair curled and a tinge of scarlet on her lips that matched the ends of her fringe—a highly unusual sight. 

"Mh, where are you going?" Lilia sang. 

"Just Stephen's."

"Stephen." She weighed the name on her tongue. "He has a name. So it's serious."

"Well, we've had a few nice dates, and he's—he's a good guy, mamma, I promise. Even mom said so, and she—"

The house key dug into her palm as she clenched her fist around it. "Lorna has met him?"

“He was in the area, and—and you don’t like men.”

She huffed, blinking the ache away, swallowing, and nodded. While she might not have the same interest in men that Lorna did, she would have hoped Alice knew she would never mock her for dating one. Didn't she know that she loved her no matter what?

Alice sighed, a breath heavy with guilt. “Are you mad, mamma?”

“No.” She stepped closer and fixed Alice's lipstick with the edge of her red nail, holding her face between thumb and index finger. The smile didn't reach her eyes. “Just sad.”

Alice pulled her into a hug and squeezed tight, squishing her cheek against Lilia's as she'd done since she was a little girl. Lilia put her hand on the back of her head and felt the hurt in her chest melt away. Even when she drew away, Alice kept her arms looped around her neck, and Lilia put her hands on them, rubbing her thumbs in crescents. "You look beautiful, piccinia. Bellissima."

"Thanks." Alice smiled and let go of her. "I'm off now." She kissed Lilia's cheek. "Don't wait up for me."

She set about to leave, but Lilia stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. "Wait. Have you heard from my docezza? She left so suddenly after the concert—"

"She cancelled band practice this week. Not sure what's going on, but I'll give her a call tomorrow."

Lilia took the information in, but it did nothing to quell her worries. Her mind went spinning with possibilities of what could've happened. "Va bene. Have fun, my love." 

"Bye, mamma."

She ran off with a wave, and Lilia looked after her for a moment before going inside. It was quiet. Her house was hardly ever quiet. Having Alice live with her again after the divorce had ensured it stayed that way, but now she was once again leaving the nest. When Alice had first left for college, it had thrown her into a midlife crisis that had led to her ripping the tapestry off the walls one night and then renovating the whole house. This time, she was developing a crush on the sinfully much younger best friend of her daughter.

She tossed everything aside—her bag, her coat, her shoes—and went to the bathroom to open the tap and draw herself a hot bath. Letting the water run, she headed for the bedroom to fetch her bathrobe, reading glasses, and the copy of Wicked Witch on her nightstand. While she was at it, she let her clothes pool at her feet and stood naked in front of the floor-length mirror. 

-> continue

[ethereallyjade]

Pick a Card: How Will Next Semester Go?

Choose a photo that calls to you and the cards will tell you a message. As always, this is just for fun. Do not take anything seriously or above legal or medical advice. If you're interested in personal tarot readings and want to support me, check out my Paid Readings! Masterlist

1 - 4

Images are not mine

⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻

ℙ𝕚𝕝𝕖 𝟙

It's gonna be real smooth. You're getting it all put together. I'm sensing that many of you may be graduating this semester. Older sibling/senior energy. There's a sense of everything finally coming together or something wrapping up nicely. Something is finished. I'm hearing 'Good riddance!' Signed, sealed, and delivered!

Your grades are going to be gorgeous. There's some kind of celebration, lots of smiling. You're going to feel very happy and abundant this upcoming semester. You'll have all your ducks in a row and feel very ready for whatever is next for you.

ℙ𝕚𝕝𝕖 𝟚

I'm getting a kinda ridged energy here, but you guys will make it through. You might have a really hard class this semester, but I'm seeing that the thing that's standing in your way the most is yourself. Do not be afraid to ask for help: talk to your teachers, find tutors, watch youtube videos, etc. Put the time in. But most of all, don't allow negative thinking to get in your way. Don't tell yourself that you're gonna fail or that you can't do it, especially before the class even starts. That kind of self talk feels like nothing in the moment, but if you keep doing it it will affect you in the long run and not only adds unnecessary stress on you but can lead to other disorders. So, like, nip in before it gets out of hand.

Give yourself the chance, do your best. You might not get the grade you want, but you will pass this class or whatever it may be. Things might start rough or confusing, but I'm seeing that you'll start catching on towards the end. So, just put in that extra work when you can and you'll be fine.

ℙ𝕚𝕝𝕖 𝟛

Similar to the last group, things might be a struggle at first, but you will catch on fast. Are some of you doing something new? A freshman? I keep seeing a young person going into college for the first time. Like, they didn't take things seriously, they were partying, going out to eat too much, hanging with friends, not doing homework, but then something happens and they're like 'Oh sh*t, this is real.' Can you relate to this? I'm seeing that you're gonna get hit with that wave of 'Oh, I actually have to lock in this time around.' There will be no avoidance or immature behavior this semester. The cards are saying to start getting your sh*t together lmao.

Not to wish bad fortune on any of you, but I'm really getting the sense of like... you will fail if you don't put in the effort. Like, go talk with your advisors, talk to your teachers, get a calendar. Everything you need to succeed is right in front of you, but no one can help you if you never ask. Watch your spending habits, don't cheat, do your homework, surround yourself with supportive good people, organize you work and time. This semester is really what you make it.

ℙ𝕚𝕝𝕖 𝟜

I'm seeing giddy, more energetic, friends, and fun. This is a more laid back semester. You've been working hard, been very mature in your schooling so far, and I'm seeing that you'll just be reaping the rewards from your past efforts. Maybe you'll be working on a passion project or doing an internship. Something that doesn't feel like real work, because you'll be so into it. You'll be feeling stable and calm this semester, feeling accomplished and just better.

You might be getting more popular. I keep seeing that kind of student that walks into any room or class and just knows somebody. If that's not you, you might just be a familiar face to a lot of people because they've seen you all over campus or at events. Either way, others are starting to recognize you for something. If you don't have good and supportive friends already, you might find them this semester.

[kinthulou]

This is all so so so true! I have had so many friends be too shy or anxious to share their writing with me because I'd shared mine first, and I'm always having to tell them that the only reason I'm so good at the writing thing? It's because I've been doing it since I was old enough to hold a pencil. Stories have been my Autistic Special Interest (TM) since I learned to read when I was two years old. All I've got that my friends don't is time and practice and I would never ever judge them for just starting out. I want to see their stories! I want them to feel encouraged and motivated to keep practicing! It's an art form!

And this is a shyness that I know super well from a different art form. My entire immediate family is incredibly talented in the music sphere. And I do mean talented--my youngest sib had no music lessons whatsoever and taught themself how to play piano and violin incredibly quickly. Middle sib picked up guitar as a teen like it was nothing. The mother unit was a stellar soprano in church choir, and the father unit, who was raised by a music teacher and so had a lot of encouragement and probably all the lessons he wanted, is not only a fantastic singer but can pick up any instrument for the first time and within ten minutes have figured out how to get music out of it. I had lessons galore. Lots of instruments. Choirs to join. All the encouragement. Almost none of it stuck. I was awful at music. Couldn't sight read music to save my life--and still can't, turns out I had an undiagnosed-at-the-time learning disability that impacts that skill--couldn't figure out my way around a string instrument, and my singing voice was so terrible I was constantly being told to stop.

Fast forward to last night, when I was listening back through a recording of a song I'd learned on ukulele last week. There were plenty of flaws in my performance, but when I listened to the vocal warm-up, in which I just sang the song a cappella to make sure my voice was good to go and I didn't need to refresh on the melody?

Fucking blew me away. You guys? Somewhere along the way I got good at singing? Like actually, legit, super pleasant to listen to, would buy an album of this stuff if it wasn't MY OWN VOICE, that kind of good????? What????? My music skills are catching up to my writing skills! I have more talent in writing than music, which is why there was a gap between getting good at writing and starting to get good at the music, but like. Just keep at it, everyone. It's just practice. Once day you'll look at your art, whatever its form, and be blown away by how far you've come. You just have to be willing to let go of perfection and give yourself the chance to try!

So earlier in art class today, someone drew a characters hands in their pockets and mentioned that hands are really like the ultimate end boss of art, and most of us wholeheartedly agreed. So then, our teacher went ahead and free handed like a handful of hands on the board, earning a woah from a couple of students. So the one from earlier mentioned how it barely took the teacher ten seconds to do what I can’t do in three hours. And you know what he responded?

“It didn’t take me ten seconds, it took me forty years.”

And you know, that stuck with me somehow. Because yeah. Drawing a hand didn’t take him fourth years. But learning and practicing to draw a hand in ten seconds did. And I think there’s something to learn there but it’s so warm and my brain is fried so I can’t formulate the actual morale of the lesson.

[scara-writes]

100% perfect

GN!Esper!Reader x Y!Guide!Male OC

Note: hello im back. A lot happened, I had an anxiety attacks, my mind has been having a lot of bad thoughts, my dog passed away last year—three months ago... I didn't have a lot of time for me to write since I've been grieving for my dog's death up until now but I'm okay, I'm healing... Anyway, my writings is rusty and probably didn't improve. I know some of you guys really tried to reach out through ask and I'm kind of happy. Thanks. For now I'll give this to piece of one shot for a new year. This Esper x Guide thing I made might not be accurate. All i know is they are similar to Alpha x Omega shits except the curse thing on espers. This might be cringe. i will try to edit it. I will try to update the other oc's as well.

-also please do not do this, i do not condone anything in this story. This is purely fiction and be kept as a fiction.

CW: implied se(g)s, implied suicide(mention), yandere, drugging, manipulation, dynamic power, etc.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

"(Y/n)!!" A ginger haired male rush up to you, hugging you by the time you step on the greenery field of the university. Pastel blue of sweater was the first thing you see before you were envelope by a hug. You tense when his arms coils around your waist, hearing him breathe out of relief as he buries his face on your left shoulder. 

You don't know what to do everytime he does this. There were eyes everywhere and it doesn't seem like he is bothered by it.

Of course why would he?

Micah Clarke is not only popular and prettiest student in this campus. He is known for being famous as the youngest champion of ice skating 3 years ago, defending his title until now. His luscious natural lips, his hazel eyes that could make you halt on what you were doing, the type to make yourself give him a third glance because he is so pretty. So pretty that you sometimes envy his glassy skin, igniting a insecurities to yourself. His soft curly ginger hair and freckled face that matches his glossy alabaster complexion. The type of guy who prefers cute, pastel than those typical guys—omg so unique(lol)—that always choose to wear dark or dull colors. Everyone finds him attractive including yourself. Everything about him screams beauty and elegance. He can hook up with men and women if he wants to but he chose not to.

From what you heard, he is a rare S-rank Guide. Most espers would try hook up with him atleast make a contract with someone like him. He would rather spend his time painting his nails, crochetting, organising or planning his time, practicing his amazing skills on ice skating, or rather do hundred routine for his skincare than hook up with other people. Quirky, Alright. Still, this doesn't stop people from wanting to go between his pants and his fame.

To people he is a swan. He is epitome of perfection.

You always see him pass by to your department, always getting called by the principal,inviting him to do a photoshoot, using his face as an advertisment for upcoming enrollent or any event inside the university. You never dwell yourself to swoon on to him whenever he pass by. Fine, you do like him. But not the kind of like where you are romantically interest to him. You just admire his looks, his talents and that's about it. You just don't like he was too friendly, there's nothing wrong with that but invading someone else personal bubble space—and the feeling of shame on yourself for being near someone kind as him—as if you two are already close is not your thing to a person you rarely talk to. Unlike him, you are the quite the opposite when it comes to socialising,You like being alone, you aren't anti-social, atleast, that's what you think you are. You are confident by yourself. An Introvert.

You just like the silence. It eases your deteriorating mind—(stupid esper curse) Somewhere peace and quiet,reading books, listening to music—gosh laufey and wave to earth and even (favorite singer/composer) always sound so good, spending time with your pets, to drown out insanity voices piling up in your head. Although you just have a few friends, you love to be alone. You once dream about getting a job. To work hard and earn a good money, once you have enough money. You would spend it to buy a house and lot somewhere away from the city and nearby the countryside with a small farm. Letting your family and friends to visit you time to time in occassions. Where you can spend the rest of your life alone and happy. A dream that would be come true if only you didn't awakened as an esper after you reach 18.

As for the guy who has the entire school and other people folded for him. He is choosing you to lend his attention, to a person who doesn't like attention. So why was he talking to someone who is a nobody like a B-rank Esper like you? The only interaction you had with him before he let himself in your life was when you pull him away from the bridge—you didn't know him at that time—a few exchange greeting—which of course he would be the first one to initiate it—and.... The party....

"N-ngh!!!" A whiny moan escape his lips. Your lips were on his neck drinking each of his soft sound coming from his mouth. The blaring party background can be ignore in the background thanks to the closed lock door of this room the both of you are in.You bite and nip his skin as if animal marking its prey. You didn't care if you torn his shirt, you just needed his guide seep through more, letting your body gone addicted to him. "(Y-y/n)!" The whay he whimpered your name made you groaned. The way every pulse from his body sends his guiding through your body.  You were delirious, you can't resist him—

"Missed you! Why aren't you checking my messages? You know I got worried when you didn't reply." He whined, his orbs shows concern and sadness. You look away.

"...hey." you greeted him with quieter tone. You pulled away from the hug not liking the way your body just relaxes everytime his guide powers automatically seeps through your body. You don't hate it but you don't like the way that your body depends on someone just for the sake of being sane and relax.

.... The shame you are feeling over the past few weeks.

You still feel guilty and ashamed about it everytime you remember those memory.

"I... I was busy. Had to do homework. I fell asleep and forgot to charge my phone." You told him. Another excuse. You just put your phone on do not disturb.

You don't have the guts to tell a sweet person like him to leave you alone. Well you did because you are ashamed to face him but he insisted it was never you fault. It always ended up him spending time with you. You can't—you owe him more than anything—Especially now that all people's oggling to you too now that you have the attention of the star. They would try to befriending you so that they could get closer to him.

Gosh, you are getting tired. Why can't people leave you alone?

You missed the old times where you can be at peace. No drama, nowhere near on people who wants attention.

"O-oh. Well that's alright."he chided before grabbing your hands with both of his. His smooth hands rubbing against your ragged callouses. He continued, "well actually I was wondering could you hangout out with me? This friday? I know you don't have schedule at that time since you showed me your schedule—And I want to spend more time with you!" He beamed. His smile was out of this world and it blinds you.

"I uhh .. have a plan on that time..." You words went silent as soon as your eyes sees the smile from his lips slowly fell down to his face."really?" The grip on your hands were getting uncomfortable.

"Umm.... I just wanna be on my home and well—"He gasped, his smile is coming back on his symmetrical face as he clung to your right arm."oh! Why didn't you say so? We can hangout together in your home!"

Giddy, he press his front closer to you which made you feel suffocating. His guide power automatically seeps through you again.

"N-no, Mikah... What I meant to say is I plan to rest, like spend alone on that day. A peace and quiet." You slowly pull away your hand gently from his clinging hands.

You didn't expect he would react like this. Tears are already in the corner of his eyes. His lips quivering. "W-what? Are you saying that I'm boring, I-I'm too loud? Did I do something wrong?"

The people who were eavesdropping at your conversation sent a glare and unwanted resentment towards you. 

You quickly shook your head. Your free hand clasping against his clutching ones that is gripping your poor unavailable hand. "No... It's not like that. You didn't do anything wrong.. I just want a me time... You know when... Uhhh before you and I become friends.... I just want to relax by myself.... You're a good friend and a good company but... We've been hanging out for a while... Ummm w-what I'm trying to say is... I want some time to be alone. You... You know what I mean right?"

Micah gave you a blank stare. You were getting uneasy. You bite your inner cheek. Will he lash out? He never seem to be the person who never received a refusal on his entire life. As soon as 2 seconds has passed, you noticed his eyes were akin to sadness. You feel the guilt running up to your spine.

You tried to avoid his gaze looking straight his frowning lips before getting replace by a forced grin. "Oh! I get that! You wish a time for yourself! Self care stuff in all that!" 

Your heart beats a little faster in excitement, is he finally leaving you for a bit? You were about to thank him for understanding. He does l—

"B-but!!" He grabbed your hands again.

You internally groan. Does he even know the word no? Of course he don't.

He never had someone says no to him. Everything he request would be at his feet. You can't yell or be rude. That's not in your nature and plus if you done it. His fans would kill you.

"I need to be with you o-on friday! You know... I wanna spend my birthday with you.. P-please? your presence alone is enough a gift for me." He stammers. You blink in surprise. "I-I promise I won't bother you the next day if you really wanna spend t-time for yourself..."

Birthday?

"T-to be honest.... I don't like parties uhmm..." He lick his lips as if the word 'party' is a taboo between the two of you." Especially my birthday parties because a-although people greet me a happy birthday or any party occasion and stuff they never really mean it. They... Always use that as an excuse to use me for my fame or my money that I earned so hard in those competitions... I.. I plan to not throw one b-because m-my family isn't forcing me anymore... I just want to spend my birthday w-with you. Y-you're the only d-decent person who treated me normally."he stammer.  You feel a lump on your throat when he says you're a decent. "I... I know... Umm I'm asking to much f-from you and I know... you didn't mean to do that—" he continues to rambles that some of his words can't form a right sentence. You noticed his eyes were in the verge of tears, threatening to drop from his eyes. 

"I'm.... Not a decent person." You told him looking away from him, ashamed and hurt were written in your face.Your voice grew quiet but the man Infront catch on what you said, already refering to the 'incident' between the two of you. He bit his lower lips and almost yelled. His face pull out a sad look. It made him look cute if it's from a tears of joy."Y-you are ! You are a decent person! You know it's not your f-fault! You were d-drugged a-and I... I was drunk! W-we both know we weren't in o-our right minds! You never hurted me—!" He starts hiccuping. "You're a-a good person! W-what happened between that night s-should b-be buried! Y-you're a good friend! It's not your fault! It's not your f-fault!" With that he burst into tears.

You didn't expect for him to cry. You panic mentally. What should you do on these type of situations? You pull him for a hug—albeit stiffeningly."Ok... Ok... Don't cry.... I don't like it... When you cry.. I'm sorry." You told him honestly, truthfully this is not the first time he argued about the incident with you.

You still feel ashamed of yourself. You really do. 

The party. If only you didn't come to your friend's party. The guilt won't eat you. No matter how many times Micah convinced you that none of it was your fault. You feel like you can't face him. He did say he was also drunk at the time but still... You could have gotten home earlier and didn't force yourself on him.

You cried and apologised so many times from him at that time, swearing you will turn yourself over to the police and never let him see your face again. You saw how his whole body was full of marks, hickeys, and bruises. He look like he got ravage. His clothes were thorn and you wish the drug in your system that time killed you.

Micah's eyes light up and a smirk forming from his lips as he nuzzle his face on your neck, pretending to cry even more. Everything is planned, everything worked for him to get you under his palm. He can feel the guilt eating you. 

"... it's okay... Hik... " He sob sneaking in to kiss your neck. You are to busy awkwardly and hesitantly patting his back and hugging him and the man love every second of it.

From the moment you save him from jumping off the bridge, he needed to make you his. Someone who genuinely cares for him from this greedy world is something he needed to treasure.

Oh how he had you wrap around his fingers the moment you accepted that drug-disguise juice from one of his friends offered by the man himself. It's your fault.

It doesn't matter. You're under his palm forever. Everything is 100% perfect.

[apalapucian]

1:31 AM

they moved the bed by the window two weeks ago, for something to do, for harry to watch the birds from. for them to feel closer to the world as much as the house can afford them.

james used to put two-way soundproofing charms in his room, on the curtains around his four-poster. he needed the quiet to sleep, and he needed sleep to win the quidditch match the next day. lily used to put the wireless on to drown out the world, the more mellow weird sisters b-sides echoing in the background of her dreams.

now, they welcome the clatter. they eavesdrop on their neighbors, revel in them singing and fighting and discussing, live in the pauses of their lives, in their leaving the door and coming back home and settling back in. tonight, crickets chirp and an owl hoots close by, and lily closes her eyes in content, ventures back out to the world through these sounds. sinks further into james's embrace. her head on his chest and their hands laced together. new moon tonight, but the street light permeates the room through the window. half of james's arm is bright orange.

his gryffindor hoodie is old and soft and familiar. he is warm. he is home.

"the cat learned how to knead," she tells him, eyes still closed.

james shifts. "huh?"

"the cat made biscuits today. on the couch."

"out of nowhere? are you sure?" he asks, in awe and disbelief. "it's been two years!"

"i know."

"and we researched."

a lifetime ago: going to a muggle library in muggle clothes, lily finding him so fucking cute in that environment and feeling the need to kiss him every two seconds. but also reading there that cats who get taken too early from their mothers don't learn how to knead. that some cats just don't do it. they were worried about the cat (that's just the cat's name, sirius named him) not ever doing it, but it turned out it's normal. but today —

"i had the same reaction," she says. "he seemed hesitant at first, so i thought he was just scratching it again, but it was actual kneading! he did it, like, a good five minutes."

"did you watch the entire time?"

she chuckles. "i burned my lunch, yeah."

"i can't believe i missed that."

"i can burn it again tomorrow."

he reaches up to pinch her nose. "the cat."

"you needed to see sirius."

quieter: "i did, yeah." it was driving him crazy. the house, not being able to fight. she could tell. besides, she felt it, too.

"he'll do it again," she reassures him. "he did it quite a few times after that, before you came home."

"why do you think is he only doing it now? he has no one to learn from here."

"i don't know. maybe it took him two years to feel comfortable with us?"

"oh my god, he likes godric's hollow? he likes it so much he literally summoned his ancestral abilities?"

well, at least one of us likes it here, she thinks, but doesn't say. she laughs — he does, too — and then they go quiet, and she knows he's thinking the same. knows he also chooses not to say it.

"what did you have for lunch?" he remembers to ask, and it's when he does this, asks these mundane questions about her in a way that makes it seem like it's the most important, most interesting things in the world, that she feels the biggest about him. that she feels a sudden surge of optimism, like she's bigger than the prophecy, than the war.

she says, reeling from the intensity of it, trying to stay in the pace of the conversation, "bacon." she feels like laughing at the whiplash. sometimes she legitimately thinks she's going crazy. "and, um. the last of the sourdough from remus."

"we should ask him for some more. that was really good."

"agreed."

"you okay?" of course he notices.

"yeah. sorry. i'm just — feeling it again."

"the house?" which is to mean everything that comes with it. the dread. the frustration. the hopelessness and uncertainty and unfairness of it all.

"yeah."

he holds her tighter, presses a kiss on the top of her head. "it's not always going to be this way, lil." he's said it so many times. to his credit, the conviction has held up. james is home. james is home.

"i know," she says, even though she doesn't. not really. "i know."

"i'm sorry it's the way it is right now though."

"you're in it, too."

"i know. i'm sorry still."

"hey."

"hm?"

"i love you. you have no idea how much."

he reaches up a second time to tip her face up and kiss her.

in another universe they don't need the neighbors to fight and the crickets to fucking chirp just to feel sane. in another universe the night can be dead still and it is fine. they kiss in the silence and it is fine. he goes out to meet his best friend and lily doesn't need the cat to distract her from being a hair away from a panic attack the entire time he's away, almost crippled with worry, her thoughts spiraling into images of unseeing hazel eyes and broken spectacles. in another universe she loves him and he loves her back and they make out in his old school hoodie as husband and wife, as parents, and that is all there is to it.

"i love you, too," he says, "and i'll live my entire life trying to show you how much."

she chuckles a bit. "geez. it's not a competition."

he laughs, the sound reverberating through his chest, literally felt on her skin. "if it was, i'll win. you'll see."

she will, unfortunately.

but for now there's this, home in her palm and the entire world through the window, her heart soaring and breaking at the same time.

//

[read/subscribe on ao3]

[valleyofthedolls777]

･ﾟﾟ･｡Dolly's sleep paralysis method for shifting

🌟 You heard that right. This is a method I'm sure someone else has thought of already, but I'm putting it into words for you guys.

Now, this method is weird and can even be scary to some. I recommend it to those who have gotten SP before or just aren't afraid of anything. But anyone can do it, really!

This is my favorite method, I've been able to minishift multiple times with it. My little brother also uses it to lucid dream :)

1. How does it work?

It's very simple. Have you ever tried shifting through a lucid dream, only to end up waking up in your cr bed, not being able to move? You might even see or hear things, what some people call "Sleep paralysis demon"

Now, here's the thing: sp demons don't exist.

🗣️-"But Dolly, why do I see, feel and hear things when I'm in sleep paralysis? It freaks me out!"

🐇- Sleep paralysis is a state, during waking up or falling asleep, in which a person is conscious but in a complete state of full-body paralysis. During an episode, the person may hallucinate, which often results in fear.

It happens when you pass between stages of wakefulness and sleep.

(If you're interested in the science behind it)

During REM sleep the body enters a state of temporary paralysis called muscle atonia. This state is likely a mechanism to prevent sleepers from injuring themselves by acting out their dreams. That's why you can't move!

Many experts believe that hallucinations during sleep paralysis occur when people experience the vivid dreams of REM sleep while they are awake.

So, don't worry about this so-called demon. It can't hurt you. Its just your half-asleep brain!

PRO TIP: When you find yourself in SP, don't open your eyes. Just relax, and remind yourself it's just your body being half asleep. If you have scary thoughts, shake them off. Sleep paralysis can even be fun if you learn how harmless it is.

2. And how can you shift with it?

Because SP is a state of half-sleepiness, it's the perfect time to manipulate your consciousness into being somewhere else.

I'll separate this method in two parts:

1.How to get sleep paralysis?

I've always gotten SP when my sleep is disrupted. That is, if I go to sleep at my usual time, like 10pm, and put an alarm to wake up at 2am (3-4 hours after falling asleep is perfect), and stay awake for a few hours, then fall back asleep, my brain will be all like: whaaaat?

My little brother also uses this method to lucid dream, and it always works for him. So, in steps:

Go to sleep when you're comfortable. Put an alarm to wake up 3-4 hours after falling asleep.

Wake up with that alarm, and now chill! Go to the bathroom, watch some youtube videos, read a book, wake yourself up, and wait until you're sleepy again. This usually takes me 2-4 hours awake. It's best to do it in weekends, please don't do this on school nights 😭

Fall back asleep. This might be hard, but just spend some time in the darkness, daydream about your dr, just relax and let your body slowly fall asleep.

You might wake up paralysed. That means it worked! (Scroll down a bit to see what you do at this point)

There are other methods to get sleep paralysis. This is just my personal favourite, but everybody is different!

2. I'm in sleep paralysis! Now what?

Now, just relax. Calm your mind, remind yourself: this is just my brain half-asleep.

Keep your eyes closed. Take your time to affirmate. My personal favourite is "I am shifting" because it's easy to remember.

Try to visualise your desired reality. Imagine you're already there. Because you are.

You might feel really strong symptoms, but I personally find them fun.

If you're very scared, don't worry. You can always wake up from SP. Just try moving a bit, and after a few seconds, you should be back to normal.

🐇

Anyways, tell me if you have any questions. I'm super bad at explaining so I'm sorry if something doesn't make a lot of sense! This is just a method, and everybody is different so what works for me might not work for you! Happy shifting 💗

- Doll

[beef-brisket]

Charlie gasped as a spear touched her throat. Once Adam and Lucifer realised she wasn't following, they turned and saw a short haired woman standing behind Charlie. Her spear outstretched.

Exorcist: Holt! In the name of the Father!

Charlie's eyes widened and slowly turned around. The woman's mouth hung open as she looked at the taller woman, her spear dropping.

Vaggie: C-Charlie...?

Charlie smiled and gently cupped her check: I'm so glad you're okay-! I thought they would have made you fall!

Vaggie leaned into her touch, resting her hand on top of Charlie's: N-No, I didn't fall. They... made a lot of threats. But I'm okay. And you're... with Adam?

Charlie glanced back at the two men who had unreadable expressions: Uh, yeah. It's a long story. Look, I think I'm going back to Hell, so maybe I'll send word to you somehow.

Vaggie: Okay, love. If not... maybe I can see you during the extermination-.

Lucifer: Extermination?

Adam: Hey, babe? Maybe not now.

Lucifer glared up at Adam: "Not now"? What do you mean by that? I'm the king, I should know about whatever this extermination is.

Adam rolled his eyes: Don't throw that king bullshit around with me. It won't work. Second, there's a lot of shit going on in Hell that you need to know about. But that's a conversation for when we get back.

Lucifer wanted to argue but decided not to. This wasn't the time or thr place, and he wasn't sure what headspace Adam was in.

Kissing her girlfriend, Charlie promised to see her again before going to the men's side to continue their way.

Charlie: Okay, we should be further enough away for you to open a portal, Lu.

Lucifer nodded and did as suggested. As Adam and Charlie walked through the portal, he felt eyes on him. Turning around, he saw Michael standing a few yards away.

He couldn't read his emotions. His face was blank, and his eyes looked dead. It was actually unsettling. But with a glare, Lucifer stepped into the portal and arrived back in Hell.

Once he stepped foot into his palace, he saw Adam checking over Charlie, making sure she was okay.

Charlie: I promise Adam, I'm fine! Really!

She laughed as he checked her hair and face.

Adam smiled: I don't know, kid. I could have sworn you were fighting the first man by yourself.

Charlie scoffed: Like he was a match for me.

Adam smiled. He felt bad for not really working with her when it came to her powers. Life seemed to keep getting in the way.

Adam: That's good to hear... I uh... how about later on, I show you how to do some cool shit, yeah? I've kinda been slacking on that front.

Charlie beamed: Really?! Can you show me how to summon a weapon?!

Adam: Sure, kid!

Lucifer: Adam. Can I speak to you out here?

Adam glanced at Lucifer before turning back and reassuring Charlie. He walked over to Lucifer, and they left the room.

Adam: What's up? Why do you sound so serious all of a sudden?

Lucifer: ...I understand it might be hard for you, Ad. But I need to know what happned once you arrived in Heaven.

Adam tensed: ...Why?

Lucifer: Did they tell you anything? Whatever this extermination is, I need to end it and gather as much dirt on Heaven as possible.

Adam sighed: Babe. You're fighting a war you can't win. And Hell has enough of those already.

Lucifer: Please, Addy. I... I'm in control, I need to know.

Adam: ...you've been in control for a few days. You can't rush into this, you know-?

Lucifer: Just- TELL me, Adam!

Adam: ...they told me how pathetic I am. Is that good enough for you? Or do you need it more words? How about this, they read me the letter you sent. Over. And over. They threw your ring at me. Told me you hated me. You never loved me. They cut off my fucking legs and arm, Lucifer! They didn't say anything interesting, just how much they want me dead and how funny it would be with my blade. So, don't pull your king of Hell shit out on me. I'm fucking, Adam! And Adam's had a rough fucking day. alright?!

Lucifer: Adam- u told you the latter was a lie-!

Adam: Oh yeah? Was giving them your ring a lie?

Lucifer: Yes-!

Adam: Then why didn't you grab it?! They threw it around and you didn't take it!

Lucifer: I'll make a new one-!

Adam: That's not the fucking point-!

Lucifer sighed; Then what is?!

Adam: I gave you that ring! I picked it out! Specifically for you! And you just... gave it to them... fuck, maybe it's a stupid thing to be pissed about, and it doesn't help that I haven't been laid in nearly a week, but fuck, Lu. I've... felt like fucking shthese last few days. First Seth and then Heaven... you gave me to them... like I was nothing to you. And maybe I am... Look. I don't want to talk about this now, I have to train the kid. Like I said, I would.

Adam rubs his face and walks out of the room, leaving Lucifer alone with his thoughts.

Lucifer: ...Shit...

I miss our God!Adam Au

Sequel 👀

In Canada Eh! Lmao

CANADA FOREVER

Yes plsss! I miss our stupid, power-hungry boy 😫😫

[ravinoforre]

So I saw an opinion on a character that I, respectfully, don't agree with at all, and it isn't the first time I've come across this particular take either. I don't like nor want fandom discourse, making counter points to arguments in general make me nervous, but as someone particularly attached to them and their related characters, I have a lot of thoughts I want to get out there in the hopes that maybe they can be seen from a more positive perspective. So um, here they are. Get comfortable, this is gonna be a long one. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In Defense of Lily (Pokémon XD).

Those of you who've played this might already know what I'm referring to, so I'm just going to rip off the proverbial band-aid. Right at the start of the game, as you, the player, are being introduced to her, one of the first things she says is;

...and ok yeah, I admit. This is kind of a weird thing for her to say (in front of her son too, oops). This is usually one of two instances that people latch onto to prove she's an awful mother, but there is, at least in my opinion, some hidden context to her words. First of all, she's not wrong; the whole lab does in fact constantly sing their praises and fawn over both these kids (which is adorable tbh). Secondly, it's not unreasonable for her to believe that lots of inflated praise on a child, no matter how well meaning, may have negative consequences on their development. A kid receiving a constant stream of "you're so cool/special/talented" may end up with an inflated ego and become depressed, or even lash out in anger, if that praise either stops or something comes along to disprove it (like failing a test or making a mistake).

(Side note, I came across some partially related studies (x), (x) and an article from a parental psychologist (x) that go into different types of praise given to children; person, or ability praise ("you're so clever") vs process, or effort praise ("you worked really hard"), their effect on self esteem, personal growth, and performance, and how ability praise actually negatively effects a child's sense of worth compared to effort praise or even no praise at all. It's a lot to go through right now and this post is already going to be super long, but I mention them here because I'll go into something later that you may find rather interesting. I know I do. They're fascinating reads, too, I would recommend!)

Now listen up! Lily, contrary to the belief that she's a cold-hearted mother who shuns her offspring, actually does praise and engage with her children! Throughout the story, she'll talk to Michael and say some interesting and wonderful things as his adventure continues! The problem is that unfortunately, a lot of this proof is hidden throughout each story beat in a section of the lab that is no longer required to enter to progress (and most people won't bother to go back and speak to their own mother who apparently "hates" them). Off to find Jovi:

🥹 baby... Before saving Phenac City:

🥺😭euuhhbbebeh father mentioned During the Phenac City hostage situation:

After the Phenac stuff:

"I'm proud of you." You literally cannot get a more explicit form of praise than I'm proud of you. Hell, I can't even recall a time my own mother told me that. Fucking hell. Also. Pampered?! You hear that? She's practically contradicting those accursed two lines! By her own admission, the kids are pampered babies! Her concern isn't that people will spoil them—because they're already spoiled!

(Jovi is a pampered baby princess). I think Lily's worry in her comment is that may roll too far; it's like she says—spoiled rotten.

Ok one more example for this section:

(disclaimer: these screenshots are from the romhack XG which is why her name isn't in all caps; trust me, this same line is in base XD too) Remember the types of praise I mentioned earlier? Ability (person) praise and effort (process) praise? And how the former could be damaging to a child's self esteem? Do you notice anything particular about the way she speaks to Michael and praises him? "You've become an outstanding trainer in your own right." Not "You're so strong." "You're doing so much for the good of others." "Your courage will save the Shadow Pokémon." Not "You're so brave." "You did it all by yourself without anyone's help." She's praising his actionable efforts! She's applying process praise! (Pleeease read those studies and article, at least the first study I linked, it's genuinely insightful and fascinating, and it's even more amazing that an example of it is featured in a video game by a character most people won't interact with beyond necessity! I love this game! So! Fuckinhg!! Much!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

Ahem. She's also not saying that people shouldn't praise her kids either; only that she wishes it wasn't gushing praise all the time. Too much of a good thing could be harmful, after all. Let's see...

Sounds reasonable so far, right?

...Galactic peace?! My brother in Arceus, all he did was beat you in a friendly Pokémon battle—a battle that Michael's already been led to believe he'd win anyway thanks to that previous comment from his coach (those screen caps are in chronological order)! Even without the fact that by this point he's midway through a dangerous fight against a criminal organization, it's probably not a good idea to give a developing young teen a literal God complex; what if he gets so full of himself he genuinely believes he's unbeatable... and then loses? That child's mental state is going to plummet. So even if you don't agree with Lily's praise comments, you might at least better understand where her concerns are coming from if this is potentially the kind of thing that's being told to her kids regularly.

Moving on, try putting yourself in her shoes a moment. She's a working, grieving, single mother of two who, according to an NPC in the lab "has an exceptionally high sense of responsibility".

As a scientist with the necessary expertise, she has the heavy task of helping realise a sensitive project—sensitive not just in terms of urgency (as Krane predicts Cipher is going to be a threat again), but also in terms of emotional weight; this project was something her late [husband] poured everything into until his death, so both her and Krane continued on with it; by the time the game starts, they're agonisingly close to completion. And time is of the essence. Quick tangent: watch the cut scene post Krane kidnap again. The camera rests on Lily an awfully long time. The father of her children died before this project was finished, and now Krane, a close friend of both of theirs, has been taken away by force. Both her children have witnessed something traumatic. Her daughter is sobbing. She's literally being told the situation is "hopeless" by a colleague. Imagine the sheer anguish this woman must be going through before having to push through all of it and take complete charge for the sake of finishing the project. For the morale of the entire lab staff. For the sake of keeping her kids calm. For the fate of the region itself. Anyway, because of this project, and how close they are to finishing, she isn't able to afford much, if any, time off to spend with her kids "this instant". It's probably why the lab staff have pitched in to help look after them (which must make her feel pretty damn guilty with that high sense of responsibility of hers). It's why she asks her son to go find his little sister in her stead.

And this brings me to point number two that I've seen used countless times to slander her:

She just lets Jovi run off on her own, and doesn't care what her kids are up to.

Which... no, sorry, hang on here. Lily isn't letting Jovi run off on her own. For starters, both her and Krane believe she's in or somewhere outside the lab grounds, playing hide and seek with the caretaker, Adon.

A game of hide and seek (particularly if they're taking turns hiding) is likely why nobody's seen her since lunch, by the way, and not Lily not giving a damn about the whereabouts of her child. And when she's found and brought home again, Lily says this;

This implies she's spoken to her daughter about running off on her own before, and we do later get to know that Jovi has a habit of running off ahead; she runs off down the steps in Gateon ahead of her brother, she rushes off to deliver the machine part by herself to the chamber, and even though Michael is the one asked, she runs off to go see Datan—despite Lily telling her she doesn't need to do that. This means if Jovi gets invested in something, it's apparently hard to stop her. Visiting Kaminko's is a recent fixation of hers, and if Adon is already aware of where else she might have gone off to if she's nowhere on lab grounds, it might mean she's been there before (that, or Adon was the one who caved and told Jovi where to find the place). I might even speculate and say Lily has specifically told Jovi before about not running off to the manor. Anyway, check out what she says when you find the little runaway but come back empty handed.

The heart-sinking realisation and disappointment in that "...Oh" alone....

So no, Lily isn't letting her young child run off on her own—Jovi is disobeying her mother. She's either used the game of hide and seek as an excuse to dip (and then forgot about Adon entirely), or she got bored midway through and decided to head to her new place of interest despite any of her mother's previous objections. (And before anyone says anything, no, that doesn't mean Jovi is a bad kid, either. She's, what, around 7 yrs old? She is doing typical little kid things, emulating her older brother, and discovering and pushing her boundaries as she grows up. I have seen some putrid, abysmal hate for her over the years too. She is a child, leave her alone.) Onto the second half of the above statement; she doesn't care what her kids are doing. As in, Michael is on a treacherous journey against a dangerous group of people and she's totally ok with letting her kid do that (as if that isn't the case with practically every mainline entry protag mother but alright, I'll bite).

Introducing one of my favourite exchanges with her in the game. During this time, the purify chamber still isn't complete, and they'll need to use an alternate way of purifying Shadow Pokémon until then—the Relic Stone in Agate Village.

oh it worries her, does it? You know what happens when No is selected?

And then she drops the conversation. There's no endless loop to get him to go, which would have been the more convenient thing for the devs to implement. But this was a very deliberate choice that tells me more about a character than I've seen done in a video game before. She's respecting her son's decision to stay home. She is not forcing him to do something he isn't comfortable with. Of course, as a video game, the purpose is to progress to the next story beat. So he has to go. Better talk to her again.

I don't even think I need to add any extra commentary, this should really speak for itself at this point.

I've also reached the image limit on this post so it's probably time I wrapped this up, so in conclusion; is Lily a bad mother, as I've seen people claim? No, and I believe I've showcased plenty to prove she isn't. She's not perfect, no parent is, but she's a damn sight more involved in her children's lives than the mainline moms, who are often nothing more than out of the way Pokémon Centers that don't acknowledge their child's journey in any meaningful way. So then, was she in the right for saying what she did at the start of the game, right after Krane praises her son, who is in earshot of this conversation? Well... also no. She could have picked a better time and place to bring it up, honestly. But God forbid a woman make a mistake or voice a concern, lest her be mischaracterized and demonized forever by two unfortunately worded lines of dialogue.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ "Michael, you're finally going off to the ultimate battle, aren't you? You've really grown in stature. As your mother, it makes me feel conflicted. I'm happy and proud on one hand, but I'm also a little sad. Go and get rid of Cipher, and make it quick! And come home safely."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ If you've managed to reach the end of my ramblings, I'd like to say thank you. Hopefully I've given you some food for thought. Maybe I've even changed your mind about her. And even if I haven't, I appreciate you taking the time to read this regardless.

[kbookblurbs]

Wind and Truth - Brandon Sanderson (Stormlight Archive #5)

4/5 - midseason-finale ass book; he needs to scrap this editor; this book simply never ends

MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW!! LIKE FIRST LINE!!!

We finally come to the end of the first arc of the Stormlight Archives and they are going to need a new name. Before we dive in, I want to clarify that I did enjoy this book! I think it tackled a series of very hard-to-conclude plotlines in a relatively good way, and I think it sets Sanderson up for success in the latter half of this series. With that said, I'll be splitting this review into four parts:

Kaladin, Szeth, & therapy speak

The Spiritual Realm plot

Azir

Book mechanics

Kaladin, Szeth, & Therapy Speak

Now first of all, anyone who's read anything I've written knows I love Kaladin - he's one of my favorite characters of all time and his journey through depression is one of my favorite parts of this series. That said. I find the whole timeline of this healing to be highly suspect, and his attempts at therapizing embarrassing at best and deeply annoying at worst. What context is there for him to go from literally attempting suicide in the last book to semi-competent therapist in no time at all? Need I remind Sanderson myself that there is no time skip between the end of RoW and WaT?

The language is also just bafflingly modern in a way that nothing in this series has been before, but we'll get to more on that later.

The flip side of this criticism is that Szeth's plotline was easily my favorite of the book. His completed arc might rise to rivaling Kaladin's (thus far) in terms of how much I enjoyed it. His backstory is so tragic (slay for the almost successful military coup though?) and I truly believed he wasn't going to make it through the book until the very last page. His moments with his father, in the past and present, brought me to tears more than once.

The Spiritual Realm Plot

This whole plotline took too long and frankly, it was boring. Watching Shallan slay her demons for the umpteenth time and deal with Formless again and kill her mother again was, and this may be controversial, not a very interesting plot point to me. She's done all this before. I feel that this book, as a whole, gave diminishing returns on her pagetime to character development ratio. I also don't feel that Shallan, with all her everything else, needed a Herald as a mother as another twist, but maybe that will be more relevant in the future. For that reason, and that reason only, I'll bite my tongue on criticizing it unnecessarily

While it was nice to see Renarin and Rlain get together, I have to admit that Renarin's POV didn't add much for me. I think Sanderson could have written the entire plotline for these two from Rlain's perspective and it would've been far more interesting since he is, in my opinion, the more interesting character between the two of them. Renarin's POV does not reveal anything that isn't already clear from other POVs.

I also just wanted more of Ba-Ado-Mishram. She was haunting the story but not present. I understand that's likely for later plot reasons, but it did make this section drag. Dalinar contributed to that but  we don't have time to get into that right now. I was happy he died though (long overdue, in my opinion).

Azir

Adolin #1 character of all time? The only one to save their assigned city and did it with 0 Radiants and the power of friendships? Nobody is doing it like him.

I loved the founding of the Unoathed and, particularly, Yanagawn's development. I'm really hoping that Yanagawn becomes a more important character in next major arc, since he was so sweet here.

I did not love that we spent probably 25% of the book in Azir fighting battles. Contrary to the opinion of Sanderson many fantasy authors, there is an upper limit on how many battles you can include before I get tired of reading them. There's only so many ways you can swing a sword or block a pike etc etc before I'm bored.

Book Mechanics

Overall, I find this concluding book to be much weaker than the other 4 in the series. Whereas it had seemed that the pacing was improving in Oathbreaker and Rhythm of War, here we were back to all over the place. While I liked that he split the plot into each day leading up to the contest, the timeline genuinely made no sense.

Beyond that, this entire book was filled with oddly YA-style prose that has never appeared in the Stormlight Archive until now. I think whoever edited this book must be different from the other four because, in my opinion, it was much too modern, not as tight, and frankly, not as good. And I know this might be controversial, but I did not think Maya calling Adolin a slut was funny. Why would she even use that word? Whore or prostitute would've been acceptable because they've been referenced here before but I found that example and others like it to be jarring.

Conclusion

I liked this book, but it's by a longshot my least favorite in the series. It was too long and frankly, some of the characters didn't even sound like themselves. I know that Sanderson can do better than this, but it leaves me a little wary for the next arc.

There's lots here I didn't cover (Jasnah my beloved, Sigzil! I'm in mourning) but this was already quite long. DMs / ask box are always open if you'd like to chat more.

[blueraspberrydreams]

rye ✩ he/them/it pronouns!! ✩ big age: 23 ✩ little age: ??? ✩ sfw only!!

!!! my main non-agere blog is @lord-janus-of-feral-plains but please do keep in mind that it might not be entirely sfw over there!! be careful!!!

current blog status: semi-active ✩ last updated: january 7th 2025

➤ this is my safe and cozy place where i can be me!! little me!! in other terms: this is my own personal agere side-blog!! ≽^•⩊•^≼ i'll be using this place to kinda reconnect with my younger self and just enjoy my interests in a more calming, positive format...if that makes any sense!!!

also!! feel free to go follow and interact with @dearestlittlefawn, who is my darling irl partner and fellow agere buddy!! love you, sweetie!!! 💙

i don't really know if i'll be making content or any stuff like that, but it is something i can think about! i've never done something like this before, so this community is somewhat very new to me. i'm excited to join however and hope to make new friends and have a good time!!

in all honesty, i don't really mind who interacts with me here, if you're another agere adult or an actual minor - as long as you are a good person and sfw, then you can chill here!! i am a bit shy tho, so do not be too surprised if i'm not the most talkative kiddo at first... (˶º⤙º˶)

⚠ i sometimes enjoy content that may be scary and/or unsettling to other people, like certain animals or games that i tend to find comfort in. please do block/mute the correct tags if you wish to engage with my blog safely!! i want you to feel safe and have a good time here!! ⚠

also!!! this blog is a secondary/side-blog alongside my main, so if you see me following you through my main, that is why!! if i could follow you all through here, i would!! but do not worry!! i want to be mutuals with all you lovely friends!!! let's all have an awesome time together!!!

🔹💙ALL OF MY PERSONAL TAGS 🔵 PLEASE READ!!! 💙🔹

🐋certified rye post🐋 ➜ original posts made by me!! (rye!!)

🐳totally ryecore🐳 ➜ posts that are much like me (#relateable)

🌊rye reblogs🌊 ➜ for all of the things that i reblog onto this blog!!

🎨rye the artiste🎨 ➜ my drawing tag!! i do draw sometimes! i do!!

📃writing with rye📃 ➜ i also like writing too!! this is for my writing!!

🦊scary rye moment🦊 ➜ for any scary/horror content (mostly fnaf)

❔ask little rye❔ ➜ a tag for any posts regarding ask box things!!

🎮ryes ask gaming🎮 ➜ another tag for specifically any ask games!

⚠ important!! ⚠ ➜ self-explanatory (for anything that's really serious)

🐟🐬✷ about me ✩ boundaries ✩ my interests ✷🐬🐟

🌌 credits for banners & dividers: sealife banner // blue star divider // double squiggle divider // blue ocean divider // blue seacore divider 🌌

[34saveme34]

me when I read a fanfic and it isn't the not being able to keep one tense going through the fic that puts me off for a second but the idea that 3 doesn't know he has feelings for 4

I honestly think he knows he likes 4 since about

hm. I'll say when he was exiled

I think he had time to think

yknow, despite all that happened before, you'd think that he would hold more against 4 but he doessnnn'tttttttttt

and I knoooow the meme life cicle but I think he was still very casual about it despite that

I think he realised then and overtime like thought it went away

and then 4 appeared again and thought he was fine, he was good

but then he gets to figure out he's basically 4's soulmate and it least now a lot of things start to make sense but not others and he's all over it again

for 4 it's IGBP 100% but only after a while

like he's throught he shock

maybe after all the annoyance with his living situation and he finally lives in his fuckin- don't remember the name of it but he settles down in the back to relax and his mind drifts back, thinks about 3 a little too much, the words he said still burning on his mind and it makes him so giddy and then it hits him like oh- oh huh, guess a lot of things make sense now. better repress!

I mean just- just think about it

neither of these idiots are brave enough to say anything like that, they're both scared of being vulnerable but 3 is more so. BUT 4 is way way more scared of rejection than 3 is. I mean they're basically the same amount of scared but from different perspectives. Like they see themselves this way is why I'm phrasing it this way, 4 is scared to be vulnerable like that too but he specifically thinks about the idea of 3 forever rejecting him and losing him all over this.

3 is also heavy scared of rejection but he's more scared of the idea that if he doesn't keep up his tough persona and tells 4 how he feels he'll be made fun of forever and no one will take him seriously ever again, not even as little as they already do, at least in his eyes.

then again I do absolutely think wotfi23 was a step forward from this

with 4 not trying to snoop around so hard to find out what 3 thinks, and 3 having less of a high wall up around 4, especially since 3 was drawing them not only in that specific art style but also with like.... the expressions are so specific. I do think 4 brings 3 a lot of joy, something that should be explored more

because got theough.... yknow what fuck it I'm overanalyizing that drawing, lemme put it here first

so like this piece of shit drawing <3

one thing first and this is gonna sound insane first but 4 takes up more place

and also has a more complex albeit not by that much pose

also his pose exudes energy, also with the face he makes as well

I think this is how 3 truly sees 4, like a bundle of sunshine who is full of unneeded energy

another interesting thing you might notice is 3's corner of his mouth

that little line by his beard.... he's cringing a little bit, almost like he's trying to mask enjoying 4's company. And in general, his eyes too and once again back to his posture and how he takes up less space than 4 it feels like he's holding back. Once again back to him being kind of intimacy. And when he tries to reach out it hurts him, he cringes and he's like fuming and crazy about it

WHILE he views 4 as being more open, more fun than him, more jolly than he'll ever be

it's crazy how jealously he is in love still despite everything

and we didn't quite see development from this

he loves him so much and still envies what he has with his whole soul

maybe one day the love will overtake the jealousy, especially with how 4 is like, slowly and slowly being more open (and a lil gay) about caring about 3

unless it's a one step forward one step backward type of thing

like imagine first episode of the year and we witness them step backward from a better and more truthful relationship they could have

because honestly, it isn't only about love. It's about communication issues, greatest example of that being Trash Friends of course (oh trash friends, how I miss watching you for the first time)

and it would be genuinely so genius if they, with 4's development about dropping more hints about just how much he thinks about 3

like being vulnerable

and if it was used against him OOOOOOH it would the BIGGEST step backward

if 3 let jealousy win while 4 is trying to be vulnerable with him

imagine the fall out. imagine 3 breaking, being like maybe 4 was right, maybe I really only think of myself

while 4 fully closing off, hurt

their relationship is SO conflict prone. which is why it's so fun to talk about, like why I've been rambling here for a long while now oops

I was reading a fanfic before I almost forgot 💀 anyways I do believe in 4 realising his feelings for 3 later than 3 does for 4, I think that's probably the more popular opinion in the fandom

might make a poll aboutt ittttt :3

[serenova]

I literally have 3.5" FLOPPY DISKS with fanfic saved to them from the 90s

I started downloading fic back then because dial-up internet wasn't something you could just.... sit on for hours a day. People needed the phone. So I'd save the webpage as an HTML file (basic shit, you just go to file>save as ) and then I'd read them offline on the big old CRT monitor my mom had

Then I wanted to be able to read them when travelling (back in the early 00s when planes didn't have wifi)

Over time I just basically made it my personal policy that if I liked a fic, I downloaded it. I still do this, even with sites like AO3 because, well, people do delete stuff they shared there. So about once a week I'll go and download any stories I bookmarked since the last time I did a download.

I use an ebook management program called Calibre to manage the epub files, and I use a plugin for Calibre called "FanFicFare" to bulk download from AO3 .... it used to work for ffdotnet but their new cloudflare thing means you can't do that anymore (boo hiss). Though, tbh, Calibre, and the extension aren't the easiest to get setup, but once they are it's pretty good!

I've got a few stories that I only have access to still because I've been doing that for years now.

People delete things, or change their minds, or whatever. And I get that. But I'm also a mildly obsessed AuDHD person who has a special interest in reading fanfic, so I make sure I can always access a story I want to go back to.

I'm also just a bit of a digital packrat as well 😅 I basically never fucking delete anything if I don't have to ... Hell, I've got a Plex server set up with 24TB of available storage... so like.... that's a thing 🤷‍♀️

I don't even want to talk about the gigs of unorganized fan art I have just.... in folders ... I'm just gonna kick that back under the metaphorical desk.... if I ever methodically go through all my external hard drives, I'll do something about it

This is your daily reminder to archive your favorite fandom stuff!!!

I've been a voracious archivist/data hoarder ever since I first got access to a computer, and it's paid off more times than I can count. Just the other day I came across a PDF copy of an analysis post for one of my fandoms. The post was made on an old forum and is the most detailed and interesting analysis of a particular story element I've ever seen. Back in like 2012 I saved the post as a PDF, because even then I saved everything I liked.

Anyway, flash forward to 2025 and I decided to see if the URL included in the document was still live. I wasn't very surprised to see that the forum is long dead. However, even the Wayback Machine had no record of this thread. If I hadn't saved a copy of it way back when, I would have never, ever been able to read this analysis again!

The Internet Archive is sadly not infallible, especially when it comes to things like forum threads. You can do your part by manually saving things to the Wayback Machine, but I also recommend keeping your own archives. Aside from just saving pages as PDFs, I highly recommend a browser extension called SingleFile that lets you archive pages as HTML files.

[dsntwrk]

help me i've gotten so deep into the steddie rabbit hole i haven't gotten this stuck on something since destiel

this really isn't good for my health

THESE ARE THE FICS THAT I SUBSCRIBED TO / LIKED READING (I'VE BASICALLY READ 1/5 WORTH OF STEDDIE FICS COMPARED TO DESTIEL FICS - I GOT INTO DESTIEL 4 YRS AGO, I ONLY STARTED READING STEDDIE FICS SOME TIME LAST MONTH WTF)

tbf, i have taken breaks from destiel to read other fandoms/fics so, ig the timing works out? if you think about it?

[icewindandboringhorror]

I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently