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#you can tell i have no experience with this stuff
daddyygh0stface · 2 days
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Hi yes I'm alive sorry for not being around. I kinda lost my job and haven't really figured out what I am doing to do or how I'm going to pay for bills or what the fuck is going to happen But yeah I am here and alive unfortunately. I probably won't answer ask or dms for a while don't really feel the greatest right now and sure as hell don't feel like talking to anyone right now.
Rant time i guess? Getting a job in our current market is hell everything I've applied to just never gets back to me. Its funny because growing up I always told you need college to get a job or be able to do anything in life, man I have friends literally went to some of best colleges and still can't even get job. It just feels like I'm constantly being lied to about everything. Weird how I'll forever be told people like me just don't wanna work yeah man I don't wanna be able to live comfortable pay my bills and be homeless. Let's also not forget the fact jobs will require you have a set amount of experience in a certain area but no job will hire you for that field without experience HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO GET EXPERIENCE THEN DUDE? Then a week before all of the job thing family member sits us all day and tells us they have cancer. This fucking disease has taken so many family members from me. I lost my grandma what will be a year ago in January I was starting to just come to terms with everything and feel somewhat okay. I will never truly get over her death but I feel like that is normal. I've had so many family members taken from me just from cancer alone this stuff runs in my family I believe and coming to that realization fucking sucks because I just want to help them, but there isn't anything I can do. I truly don't know what to do or what to think anymore.
Writing this really late into the morning and i'm going to schedule the post sometime not sure when
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apostaterevolutionary · 22 hours
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I am so sorry, apparently it’s 2024 and I’m arguing about dragon age again lmao. How did I get here! Why is this happening!! Time is a flat circle!!!
Anyway. People can feel how they want about the past games not mattering in this game. If you’re cool with it, I’m happy for you. But there’s one particular argument in defence of this choice that is really, really bothering me and I have to rant
The thing I keep seeing is “well all this other stuff has nothing to do with the main plot or Rook, so it should be cut” and that’s. Not a good way to tell stories in my opinion. Because here’s the thing: it’s not about the Big Overall Plot. It’s about the characters that live in this world, big and small
I’m going to use the example of Varric and Hawke cause I think it’s the easiest to explain quickly. Varric is a storyteller. That’s the defining trait of his character. He tells stories, and sometimes they’re true and sometimes they’re not and sometimes it’s something in between. In DA2 he tells you about his brother. In inquisition, he talks about hawke and there’s banter about several of the companions. Most of these are just little one liners that don’t “serve the overall plot” but they serve Varric’s character
And that matters
So if we take this character known for telling stories about people that have been in his life, well, he largely can’t do that now. How can he talk about Hawke, someone who can be a very close friend of his, without even their gender being a choice you can select? Or whether Varric should be saying ‘is’ or ‘was’ about them? How can he talk about the companions in DA2 or inquisition when a lot of them don’t have to be recruited or can die? Will he limit himself to only characters that are guaranteed to be a part of it and alive? Or is it that he and Rook will have such a shallow relationship that Varric, of all characters, never talks about his life and past exploits?
Or has Varric as a character changed so much that he doesn’t even want to tell stories anymore? That Hawke living or dying means nothing to him? That the friendships he built with people in 2 games mean nothing to him? That he’s become literally unrecognizable?
This is where the problem is. Sure, Rook maybe doesn’t care about these people they’ve never met. But do they care about Varric? What about if a companion mentions an old friend of theirs, talks about an experience they had that made them who they are - is that only okay if that experience isn’t from a previous game? Or are all the characters so flat that we never learn anything about their connections to others outside of Rook? Is this story SO focused on this player character and this plot that NOTHING else matters, even within the world, and there’s no depth to be found in any of the characters that feature in it?
Writing characters so that they only ever talk about things that “directly serve the plot” is how you get flat, unremarkable, boring, forgettable characters. And that’s not something I would have accused bioware of doing even if some instalments are stronger in this area than others. But it sounds like that’s what they’re doing here, at least with the past characters. Cause sure, maybe Morrigan is so closed off she’ll never mention her son and partner. That’s believable, even if iffy given that they’ve said she’s going to be more involved than we think. But Varric? VARRIC??? Never mentioning ANY of the people he used to spend time with and care about except Solas and maybe some of the inquisition characters that can’t die or not be recruited but also carefully skirting around what happened to them in the game? That’s literally not the same character
And I would expand this to like. A letter mentioning this or a codex mentioning that, or ambient dialogue about so and so - that makes the world feel deep and those random, unimportant NPCs feel richer by connecting them to the larger world. It’s not about “serving the plot”, it’s about making your world and characters deep enough that they feel real, lived in, and like something we can actually care about
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mogamuncher · 1 day
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Heeey I'm back! It's finally time for the full Cakeverse analysis gang!
Ok, so, for a refresher:
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There's the Forks, the Cakes and the Plates (normal people), and it goes like this:
Plates are just normal people, the majority of the world population, nothing new here.
Forks: Can't taste and sometimes can't smell either, sometimes they used be able to taste but lost it with age; either way, they can only ever taste cakes.
Cakes: Basically normal people except that they're delicious, everything from them (flesh, tears, saliva, etc) tastes like cake (or other foods if you want). You can't tell who's a cake or not unless you're a Fork that's tasting them in some way.
Now, I have to add some stuff that's really interesting and that the og author said, that we'll be getting into today.
• Forks go absolutely bat shit insane when they taste the Cakes most of the time, that can lead to a lot of things, cannibalism, sex, or (if you're cultured) both.
• Both Cakes and Forks suffer from their own societal plights. Cakes die a lot, and Forks when discovered are instantly pinned as murderers, criminals and perverts, even if they haven't done anything wrong yet.
• Cakes can derail a Fork's entire life, and Forks are like sin and temptation to Cakes.
Now, I want to talk about these because they absolutely fucking vexed me and now I want to make this all of y'all's problem.
「The First Taste」
It's essentially a common rule as said by the author that the Forks go insane after feeling the taste of a Cake, now, let's talk about: Why?
See, Cakeverse is technically an Au based from the likes of Omegaverse, which you can see by the structure being similar to Alpha/Beta/Omega with the three types of people out there. But, in ABO the Alphas going insane is due to a specific event, heats, which are there specifically for reproduction and are said to bring out animal instincts out of people's control, while Forks are based on simply taste, food, and not something as biological.
Of course it's up to the individual writer to an extent, but my interpretation of why Forks lose it when they taste Cakes is more psychological when compared to Alphas in the Omegaverse.
Imagine that you are completely unable to see color, never once have you seen one, you grew up hearing all about how wonderful colors are, you saw others compliment the colors of several works of art, you heard all about the colors of the world around you, but all that you see is beige and grey. Now, imagine that one day you bump into someone, and suddenly you're able to see all the colors, for the first time ever in your life, you can finally experience blue skies and green grass, you can see the same way the rest of the world sees, something that was fundamentally missing from you is finally gifted to you by this stranger on a silver tray.
You're finally complete.
That's the reality of what Forks go through, years of eating tasteless food, seeing people enjoy food wholeheartedly and rant about the tastes, hearing about the differences between expensive food and cheap food, and then suddenly finally tasting cake. Of course they go insane and fixate on it, it's like the final puzzle piece finally sliding into place, something that they've been missing this whole time being manifested with only a taste.
Before, eating was a chore, something simply to survive there was no joy in it, no fun to be found in desserts or snacks, but with only a single kiss the Fork finally feels what it is like to crave food, to want food for the taste.
Cakeverse in nature is oddly psychological, playing with the concept of taking away something extremely core to the human experience, taste. It's inherent and everyone has it, you'd probably feel like a freak of nature if you didn't have something while everyone else has, right?
That's what Cakes bring Forks; normalcy, joy and purpose, it's basically like a shot of endorphins all at once straight into your bloodstream, there's a good chance it'd hit like a truck and fuck you up majorly.
Forks acting rashly probably looks different than when Alphas do the same, because the motive is inherently different, but the desperation is arguably more raw.
A lot can be written on what that reaction would be:
Immediately trying to taste the Cake (kissing, licking, biting), trying to play cool only to strike later (potential kidnapping, manipulation, planning and scheming in general), the Fork can try to resist temptation or maybe the Cake can notice the extreme reaction and run away, maybe the Cake can instigate and bait the Fork to take a bite.
It could lead to fluff, to relationships starting, relationships ending, it could smut, it could be gory cannibalism, hell, it could be both.
Either way, the sheer amount of character study that could be made out of this tidbit alone is insane, and the story concepts don't stop there!
「We Do, In Fact, Live In a Society」
Cakes don't know who they are until it's too late, but I can imagine that in society they'd be treated with a lot of extra care if they are known beforehand, as they are constantly in risk of dying.
Imagine that they'd also be majorly babyfied, the "nooo poor babies that can't do anything wrong, poor helpless and weak Cakes, they clearly can't take care of themselves, they're so vulnerable, don't worry I'll speak for you to protect your honor" would be insane. Any Cake that consensually and willingly gets with a Fork will be doubted if they truly wanted to do it, think nosy people pulling them aside to ask if they're ok and pressing to see if they're abused, think people immediately thinking that Cakes can't consent to anything with a Fork on principle despite them being grown adults.
Online discourse would definitely have people saying "Cakes are minor coded" or some shit, mark my words.
While Forks would be instantly persecuted for everything. Because of something they didn't choose, that was inherited at birth, they now are fully seem as murderers, kidnappers, rapists and just the lowest of the low. People will gossip, people will get defensive, people will cower any time you slightly raise your voice, you're seen as a predator, treated no different than a wild bear. To society at large, you're an unruly dog, and all eyes will be on you forever, watching, waiting for the day that you take a bite.
In a sense, it's almost like any Forks that do commit crimes instantly have a justification to do so, it's expected, really, you're a Fork, if course you'd snap one day. It's both maligned and normalized, everyone expects it and it almost gives Forks a reason to do so. Forever a self fulfilling prophecy.
Now I'm sorry that I'll keep bringing the Omegaverse up, it's just that it's really handy for comparison, but I find it fascinating that in a way, the societal effects of this are a mish mesh of the societal views seen in ABO, but like, in a way that doesn't make me want to vomit.
Can I be so fr with you guys right now? I don't like the societal parts of the Omegaverse, ever since I was a kid in the early hay days of the internet, that always made me uncomfortable, and it's also a bit lazy in a way. The problems in society with the Omegaverse are basically just Sexism, it's misogyny with mpreg, and a lot of fics end up feeling like a Handmaiden's Tale with mpreg. Replace Alphas with men and Omegas with Women and you get the Omegaverse, though it gets a bit interesting since there technically is a built-in "fuck or die" and aphrodisiac system with heats/ruts, but very few writers do something interesting with it.
My problem is that it's always either uncomfortable or outright boring, very little fics do it well and most of the time authors simply choose to side step it altogether, which I completely understand and actually prefer at this point.
I bring all this up because Cakeverse actually brings a lot of interesting concepts up in it's consequences on the world at large, the nature of Forks and Cakes mirrors a lot of real life concepts, but leaves enough fantastical elements that there's still intrigue in what could be explored and seem from authors writing certain details of it.
Would there be Cake support groups? Would there be Fork rights activists? Would there be people who are both Forks and Cakes, like a hybrid type? What are different relationship types seen as in the eyes of society as a whole?
It's all so complicated and the problems are different between the both of them, also, they're evenly split, which is a breath of fresh air.
Now, it's time to get even deeper into this, what are exactly Forks and Cakes relationship with each other like?
「Would You Still Love Me If I Was Cake?」
According to the author, Cakes can derail a Fork's life and Forks are temptation to Cakes. Now, why is that?
Imagine you're a Fork, living your life trying to do what you can with what's been handed to you, probably being discriminated against if you haven't been able to hide it well, when suddenly you taste someone (kiss or by accident, like a shared water bottle), and next thing you know you lise your mind. Your entire world falls apart, thoughts of dreams, future, your own sense of morality, it all melts away like sugar in water because you just experienced heaven and now it's all you can think about.
Someone completely normal beforehand, suddenly driven to obsession with just one moment, an entire life detailed into the unknown because they just had a taste of cake, thoughts being all about one person and their taste, the inability to stop even you're desperate to do so. It's madness, and almost like a tragedy, doomed by their own personal narrative of Fork meets Cake, the Forks turns into a starving beast whether they want to or not.
But Cakes? Imagine you have someone you love, and they want you so badly it drives you mad, imagine kissing the same lips that want to be stained with your taste, imagine putting yourself in the way of jaws that any of these days can close down on you and swallow you whole. You're constantly in contact with someone that could just straight up eat you, consume you whole and leave nothing behind, but your heart aches for them, you present yourself in a silver platter again and again.
Maybe you want to be eaten, to be consumed. Maybe you like being wanted, maybe you enjoy providing something to to others, you made them so happy that it doesn't even matter to you that they are taking chunks out of you, you'll gladly let yourself be torn apart if it means someone else is satisfied.
It's all about the usage of "Cannibalism as a Metaphor for Love™", it's all about loving someone but constantly wanting to eat them into non-existence, it's about to struggle between your brain heart and stomach.
It's about having your cake and eating it too.
The themes, the metaphors, the opportunities are endless and frankly I'm driving myself insane just imagining all of it, the angst also would be utterly fucking insane, imagine you live someone and you eat them, wouldn't you be upset? You loved them and you killed them yourself, with your own hands, their taste is on your lips and you locked your plate clean.
I'm screaming and crying and throwing up as we speak, the number of things you can do here are endless, soooo. . . Let's talk about some of my ideas!
「All My Fanfiction Titles Are Just Songs」
Last post I basically tagged a bunch of fandoms that I wish would use this trope (I'll also be doing that with this post), so now I'm going to showing some of the ideas I had for this AU that I might or might not write in the future, all of which you guys are totally free to use as prompts as well (just tag me on them lmao)
So, going ship by ship:
「Loveit」: Dead Plate fanfic, Vincent x Rody, Fork!Vincent and Cake!Rody. I imagine that the moment Vincent finds out is during the Best Served Hot ending, after biting Rody's ear, his reaction would show instantly on his face and Rody would notice right away. After that it can lead to a lot of things, fighting, smut and cannibalism galore, their relationship would only get more complicated after such a discovery. Hell, you can even have Vincent find out earlier, if you truly want more juicy drama, maybe Vincent will attempt to make Rody into the meal instead of Mason this time? For funsies you could even reverse it, Rody as a Fork would be fascinating to see, him bonding with Vincent that he also can't taste anything, only for him to find out later that he can taste Vincent himself, holy shit the intrigue.
「Eat You」: Death Note, Lawlight, Fork!Light and Cake!L. Imagine Light both having to hide the fact that he's Kira, but also having to hide the fact that he's a Fork, imagine the never leaving stain that being a Fork would be on his own self-perception of perfection, imagine the so called god that punishes criminals also being considered a criminal by default in society's eyes if he's ever found out. Kira selling out his own kind because most criminals would likely be Forks (whether they were rightfully convicted or not), and then comes in L, a detective, a nuisance, Light's equal and a Cake. Maybe Lights would find that out later on, maybe while they're playing as friends in college or while chained together, and now L had effortlessly thrown another wrench in his life yet again by default, like they're meant to be opposed by fate itself, where Kira is a Fork L is a Cake. L would likely goad Light on, trying to bait Kira out, by any means necessary, even if it means being eaten.
「Eat You Piece by Piece」: Hear me out, Batjokes. Fork!Bruce having to hold himself back from breaking his own morals due to finding out Joker is a Cake, Fork!Joker only getting deeper into his Batman obsession after tasting a Cake!Batman, Both Forks bonded by not having taste, maybe both are Forks that differ on how they react to Cakes (Joker regularly eating them while Bruce retains his morals and chooses to not hurt them), maybe both Cakes that got here because they were almost eaten (different Batman and Joker origin stories?). The opportunities are all intriguing and promptly end in bloodshed, expect angst and discussions of what is moral, also just so much angst holy shit this shit hurts.
「I Eat Boys Up」: Dungeon Meshi, Labru, Fork!Laios and Cake!Labru. I'm thinking post canon by accident, maybe something like sharing utensils, and I'm going to be so fr with you right now, this story coming from me would be a lot of romanticism through food metaphors and unending smut, feral Laios is my equivalent of heroin and I could imagine him describing Kabru's taste in detail to him while eating him out. But if smut isn't your jam, exploring how Laios and his monster obsession, especially in the form of food, as someone who can't taste would be intriguing, in a story so closely tied to food, you have to wonder how it would all change if the main character couldn't even taste. Also, I doubt Kabru would take the knowledge of him being essentially prey well, so there's that bag of worms to go into if you want.
「Blame Gluttony」: This one is purely self indulgent but like, Re:Zero with any ship, Cake! Subaru and Fork!anyone else. Imagine Subaru's world doesn't have this Cakeverse nonsense at all, but the world he's transported to has, imagine how scary it would be that one loop he suddenly finds out that he's essentially universal prey here (maybe in the second loop with Elsa), imagine the weight of all the things that already are trying to kill him along with the fact that he's also got a new thing to worry about? Maybe instead of just the rabbit loop, there's now multiple loops where Subaru is eaten alive, maybe there's loops where his dear friends themselves are eating him. Can you imagine if Emilia was a Fork? If he found out after the kiss of death and she commented on the taste of his lips as he was dying, if it came up again after their kiss, Subaru having to tackle with his love and heart belonging to someone that would one day eat him whole. Imagine the witch not longer just wants to touch his heart or kiss him, but she also bites him when he tries to tell the secret. Imagine maybe Rem is also a Fork, imagine that his death by her hands also involved her tearing into him chunk by chunk. What if Otto was a Fork, what if Reinhard was one? Seriously all the opportunities are equally traumatizing and I'm living for it!
Honorable mentions include: Persona Shuake and Shuada (Fork!Protags and Cake!Detectives) for the optimal mutual murder extravaganza, Okegom DSP Satanivlis (Fork!Ivlis and Cake!Satanick) for a rare case of role swapping, South Park Kyman (any way works tbh) for mutually assured destruction, Slay the Princess (Fork!Princess and Cake!Birb) because themes, Soukouku (Fork!Dazai and Cake!Chuuya) for making canon even worse than it already is, frankly any investigrave game would be peak here, Hannigram for obvious reasons.
But that's all I have for now, so, what have we learned here?
We learned that: I'm mentally ill and you need to write about the Cakeverse NOW.
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bluepandadraws-log · 3 days
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I wanted to say something, and I'm not trying to be rude in any way.
I have autism, and I've known about it for my entire life. People bullied me in school, but they would mostly wonder why I was so annoying. I was never targeted because of my autism, the kids just didn't know any better.
When I hear about people who don't know from the beginning and think something is wrong with them, it breaks my heart. Hearing names called just because of who someone is, and something they can't help, angers me. I consider myself extremely fortunate that I have a family who knows about that stuff and can help me through anything.
My point is, I'm not sure what your story is, but I appreciate you bringing awareness to this, and I can tell how you care. It means a lot to me, and I can only imagine how it does to people who are going or have been through similar experiences.
And if you are going through stuff like this or have been in the past, I'm very sorry, and as a nobody on the internet, I'm rooting for you. 💙
I'm very glad my silly story about and Anxious Autistic jester is connecting to similar experiences! I write from what I know and have been through in the past and present(and most likely future), and the story is low key based on how I'd get mocked and called... bad things, cuz I was "too passionate" about a topic.
Like Pomni, I also don't want anybody to feel like they're nothing,and everyone deserves understanding. I'm sorry you went through that as well. Hopefully, we both can grow stronger!
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ninnosaurus · 18 hours
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The boys vs substances
HELL-O I've been seeing a bunch of stuff where the brothers smoke and drink so
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I started thinking
So here's some more headcanons I have with the boys, nicotine and alcohol. Because I live in ✨Sweden✨ and the Funny Grass is illegal here, so I have no experience with it. 🤷🏻‍♀️
All boys have tried both nicotine and alcohol, of course. Even before getting help from April to get stuff, they ordered shit online.
They can get slightly buzzed, of course but they need ALOT to get actually y'know blasted hammered shit faced drunk, which is why it's rare for them to reach that point. This is due to well, their mutation. Because it gets ✨expensive✨.
They get a very slight rush of nicotine, but it doesn't really have any actual dangerous effects on them thanks to their mutation.
Raph likes beer, scotch and dry ciders. Preferbly, dry apple ciders. My guy will kill someone for anything apple flavored.
Mikey is a Smirnoff Ice kinda guy. He likes all of them, but his absolute favorites are "Mango" and "Pink Lemonade". He's also the shots kinda guy when he's really in a party mood.
Leo is 100% a cocktail man. Please, he loves cocktails of all kinds. Give him a daiquri and some strawberries and he's content with LIFE. Really loves piña coladas too.
Donnie is the wine guy. EXCEPT! Red wines. He tries to find a red wine he enjoys but to him, all of them tastes the same and is too dry. He's got white wines and rosés DOWN, though. April often ask him for advice <3. Is known to drink whiskey too, however. He and Raph online windowshop expensive whiskeys and scotches sometimes.
Raph is known to smoke ciggs from time to time on the topside. He likes going up there alone during rainy nights and sit under some plastic roof or tarp. The sound of rain hitting the plastic + the cigg makes him relax.
Mikey and Leo doesn't smoke. Never like the taste of it.
Donnie vapes. I'm sorry, but he does. Mostly because he can chew on them while thinking about something when working. Has a collection of flavors. (don't tell Leo I said this but despite not liking to smoke he stole one or two of Donnie's vapes)
TAGS WOHO: @redsrooftopprincess @the-cauldron-witch @thelaundrybitch @avery73 @thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos Please let me know if I missed you :3
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prentissluvr · 2 days
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sam would be the best boyfriend when ur on ur period, he’d immediately know what to do, he’d go to the store and buy you what ever pads and/or tampons you need, snacks, everything. there’d definitely be a time where he’d make a little gift basket out of the stuff and it’s just so cute. he fills you a hot water bottle, lets you braid his hair (he claims to not like it but he deffo does), he lays your head like where his bellybutton is and plays with your hair whilst talking to you in a velvety voice and gives you so many cuddles and tells you how beautiful you are if you get bloated or breakout or anything and gives you lots of kisses on your body wherever you’re comfortable with it
-💽
babydoll you sent this at the perfect time!! because i just got my period yesterday lolll so i was totally thinking about this <33
tw mentions of throwing up, passing out, and overall bad period pain rip lol
i like to think about how younger sam had almost no idea about periods. he probably heard things here and there about it whenever he was able to be in school, maybe even learned about it on his own because he's a curious, intelligent, and kind sweet boy!! but he's never very close with an afab person until he meets jess. he's naturally sweet and caring, so he learns quickly with her.
so when he's with you, he's ready and prepared to be the best boyfriend in the world. he learns what you need specifically and what you like best and it ingrains it in his memory!! (crying i know this isn't about samjess but everything is about samjess to me, so i'm thinking about the fact that he still remembers what jess liked the most :((( sobbing . like what if the first time you text him to pick up pads or something, he unconsciously grabs the kind she'd buy before remembering he can just ask what you want. he probably knows your favorite candies by then, so he doesn't think to grab jess's, but he does remember. i just love them a lot SORRY) ANYWAYS !!!
i'm crying at the idea of sam only letting you braid his hair when you're on your period because you'll get upset if he doesn't LOL but that he secretly really likes it and would totally let you do it any other time if you ask him sweetly enough. (he's down bad and will do anything that you want. he caves so easy). and he like. feels like he should be playing with your hair instead, but he knows that playing with his hair calms you so he just sits there in utter contentment like. wow i'm soooo in love with them :,)
AGH laying on his belly makes me so :(((( that's when he gets to play with your hair to relax you <3 wahhh and i'm crying about how assuring he is with you <333 he's so so incredibly sweet and just pours on the compliments when he knows that you need them. so so so many kisses!!!
and on the topic of laying on tummies <3 for some people, pressure makes cramps feel better. and i just imagine sam absolutely melting and wanting to CRY at how in love and endeared he is with you if you ask him to lay his head on your tummy to help with the pain. while he's there, he'll tell stories and gently massage your legs or just lightly rub over your sweet skin <3
speaking of massages i think he's the bEST at giving them!! his hands are so big, which helps massively, and then his touch is so gentle, yet steady and it is just so completely soothing <3 he loves being able to take even a little bit of your pain away. and he hatesss to see you in any pain he's so :((( so he does everything in his power to make it as bearable as he can!!!
ofc everyone has different experiences with their periods, but i know that in the hunting context, i personally would have such a shit ass time with my period because i doubt it'd be too easy to get birth control to tame my horrible cramps. so i think about how concerned sammy is when he realizes just how bad it can get :( headcanon that jess probably got pretty bad period cramps too but i can imagine she had access to birth control or meds to help out, so when he sees you in so so much pain he's so so worried :((
he feels soo so awful seeing you throw up or get faint or even pass out from the pain because he knows he can't fix it. so instead he's just so so caring and soft and perfect about it. especially if it gets this bad for you, he's extra careful to keep track of your period to make sure that you're never going to be doing anything strenuous during that time. if you're in pain while on the road, he gets in the back seat with you to hold you and put his warm hands on your belly until you can stop at the nearest gas station to get you a hot water bottle or something for the pain. he's perfect and i love him so much and i need need need him to take care of me while i'm on my period lol
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How I Come Up With Compelling and Fun Characters!
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Back at you again with another TedTalk.
Coming up with well-rounded characters is my favorite part of the writing process. I like to come up with convoluted plots, so ofc convoluted characters have to follow. While I am someone who is VERY guilty of injecting my own traits/experiences into my characters (because I like to live vicariously through them or use them to cope don't @ me), I try to do that once I've established them as their own people. Because then they just end up being other versions of me, and we don't want that trust me
The adage I like to live by is "when the character feels real to you, they'll feel real to the reader," so I try to go out of my way to know as much as I can about them before I start to put them down on paper.
I know full names, birthdays (down to the hour), exact heights, blood types, favorite colors, foods, etc. and I try to know most of the surface-level things. I'll try to delve a little deeper but I do like to let my characters breathe when I'm writing them because sometimes they do things that make me stare into the camera like I'm on the Office and I want to give them the room to do so because that's like 60% of the process (in my humblest of opinions as a self-taught/ professional hybrid)
When I first started writing my novel, I could tell you off the top of my head that my protagonist, Odette Harmonie Cinq-Mars, was born in the little fictional town of Pendulum Province, France on December 14th, 1997 at 8:16pm, her blood type is AB+, she's 5'0, she's left-handed, and her favorite color is royal purple. I could also tell you she has anger issues, is hyper-observant, is a classically trained singer and dancer, and is kind of cold as a person. That last trait ended up writing most of itself out as she developed, but it's how she started, and I never got much deeper than that until I wrote her.
But, rewinding a little bit, I like to come up with ideas for my characters from tropes and stereotypes. My truest formula for coming up with characters is:
Trope/Archetype
- Some tropey traits
+ Traits you might not normally see in that trope/archetype
+ As many details as possible
+ Putting them in random situations that come to mind and watching them figure it out (even if it might be unrelated to the plot)
+ A little bit of yourself (always optional)
For example:
My "tropiest" character's name is Noel Masse; he was heavily based on the archetype of the peacocky gay theater kid who kinda has a hoe streak. Before you come for my neck, hear me out.
What are traits of this trope I could erase (or heavily modify) for him? From my experience theater kids get kinda cliquey--not all, but some--Noel has his friends, but he's the type who wants to be friends with everyone. He doesn't like to judge unless people give him a reason to. Theater kids might have their heads in the clouds all the time, and Noel airs on the side of keeping himself grounded when he needs to.
What are some odd traits I could add to him? What can I expand on? Noel has severe indecision--he's a theater kid who doesn't know if he wants to be theater kid. He has dedicated his life to being a musical theater star, but he has a calling in mystery solving, coding, and all things tech. This indecision often cripples him, and even seeps into his love life, which leads to some promiscuity~
What are the little details I know about Noel? Noel Coretyn Masse is a natural born witch, born in a little (fictional) city in France called Athamera on September 9th, 1997 at 12:11am. He is 6'0, 175 pounds, blood type O-, ENFP-T, right-handed, his favorite color is royal blue, and he has a gifted vocal octave range (3.8), and is very good at most forms of dance.
What scenarios have I put him in that helped him build? This was actually how I decided he was good with technology and all things coding, hacking, computers, etc. I figured out he was good at this stuff when I needed a character to hack something later on in the story and I threw him into the mix just to see what would happen and it stuck IMMEDIATELY. So, this category can also help build category 2 for sure.
Bits of me? His dedication to the arts and his desire for a large friend group hope I didn't just roast myself lol
DISCLAIMER: I want to make a note for anyone who thinks that this is overkill: yes, it probably is. But, I also want to note that I have been told time and time again that my characterization in my stories is my strongest point. So, clearly I'm doing SOMETHING right here.
I also want to note that this is NOT the "correct" way of coming up with characters. In fact, I don't think there is a "correct" way (as is with most things artistic and creative). This is just MY way of doing things. If you have a way that you come up with characters that works for you, I'd love to hear about it!
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redux-iterum · 1 day
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So I’m curious about Goldenflower’s reaction! We’ve seen how aggressively she reacts when kits or young cats are put in danger (ie. Fireheart being left out alone). So I was surprised she allowed the ceremony to proceed. Is Bluestar’s failing mental health the reason why she didn’t react more strongly and shut that shit with Aspen/Ash/Cloud down? Also where do the clans draw the line in regards to someone like Bluestar when they’re not stable enough to really be held accountable, but they are putting other clanmates in danger through their actions?
There's a couple things going into this, so bear with me.
This whole situation is extremely difficult for everyone in a position of power, let alone the average warrior. Ideally - that is, how the Clans imagine stuff like this to go in stories - the leader can be disobeyed and disregarded by their followers, no questions asked, the instant they fuck up or do something dangerous. The matriarch has all the power over kits, the deputy can step in as the proper head of the Clan, the elders will be looked to and the seers have all of StarClan to give out judgements and commands. This is a sort of checks-and-balances type of society! It's going to be so easy to handle if it ever does happen!
Realistically, though, Clans are hardwired to obey their leaders above everyone else. It's why Brokenstar got away with everything for so long, it's why Tigerclaw would have been so much more dangerous if he'd gotten there, and it's what's allowing Bluestar to keep her position even though her mind is visibly failing. Leaders aren't untouchable, theoretically, but it is so very hard for a Clan to look at the cat who's so important to their society that they have an entirely unique suffix just to denote their rank and tell themselves "I refuse to honor them and do as they say", even if they have a good reason, or several. Even at this point, ThunderClan will obey their leader over their matriarch, and the matriarch will be forced to go along with this, not knowing what else can be legally done.
To disobey says so much about the warrior and the Clan as a whole: they made a mistake placing such massive responsibilities on this cat's shoulders, they have nowhere to put the demoted cat that will go smoothly, they're threatening the unity and structure of the Clan by shaking the very foundation of what they've grown up and lived with. It's so hard for a cat, let alone a warrior, to adjust to severe changes like that, especially ones that imply something at fault within themselves - which, inherently, following a bad leader for any length of time will shine a light on. Sometimes it's easier to keep silent - or, at the most, mutter complaints to your friend while doing nothing.
There's another aspect of this botched apprentice ceremony: the apprentices themselves. Changing from a kit to an apprentice is such an important, valuable, special thing for everyone; it's the biggest change in your life so far and it marks you as ready to serve your Clan and grow up to be someone great. To go through with the ceremony and then rip away that gift from cats so young and new to the world is a particularly cruel sort of disappointment, bordering on punishment in the eyes of that kit. Can you imagine being a grade schooler, about to enter middle school, and then being told you have to go back to kindergarten because someone else fucked up your paperwork? How awful would that be?
Speckletail made about as good of a call as she could in that moment, taking the apprentices' ages, their mentors and the Clans' culture into account. Let them be apprentices until they prove they're not ready, and if they aren't, they can go back to being a kit. This sort of solves the problem in a way - the apprentices will be eager to prove they can keep their -paw's and will work hard to do so, and if they fall behind...well, maybe they can just stay in camp for another month and then come right back to training with some experience already! It's not ideal, but it's the best Speckletail could do.
As for the final question... did you know that it was believed that planting an elder tree by your door would keep the devil away?
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cerastes · 9 hours
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This might be too broad of a question and sorry if it is (also sorry if it's been asked before?), but I wanted to ask if there are any particular books you may recommend to someone learning about psychology?
Also what did Rosmontis do if I may ask
Rosmontis: here.
Psychology: I personally recommend learning about second-order cybernetics, in which the observer is circularly and intimately involved with/connected to the observed. The observer is no longer neutral and detached, and plays an active role in system. This is key to Brofenbrenner’s Ecological Model. Basically, this stands conceptually opposite to the Lacanian take on Freud’s psychoanalysis, as Lacanian purists will insist you exist as an extraneous entity to the focal point being observed. You, as a psychologist, are still human and a mutable, mutation-inflicting aspect of any life you wander into. The psychologist as an outside-above observer is a flawed concept in my opinion.
All this prelude is to say: Read Ludwig von Bertalanffy’s “Organismic Psychology and Systems Theory”, 1966, and get to know the General Systems Theory. One cannot work with one part of a system, micro or macro, if one hopes to truly help someone. What people often call “illness” tends to be symptoms of something else, and each person is a whole world.
Specifically about working with kids, I like Donald Winnicott’s works. “Playing and Reality”. Winnicott puts lots of emphasis on how creativity and play are incredibly good tools in understanding and communicating with babies and children, and this can and should be used alongside other techniques to create a platform of conversation, if needed, with older kids that for one reason or another struggle with conventional communication. Winnicott also proposes the “Good Enough Mother” theory, which is to say, the best parent/caretaker is one who is good enough to healthily provide for the kid in all areas, and still messes up or lacks some skills overall to provide children a safe, controlled space of adversity; it is through this safe adversity that children learn to be self-sufficient by learning to make up for what the caretaker lacks or doesn’t do perfectly. Overprotective parents, then, run counter to healthy development of the child, something that proves right more often than not.
Finally, Humberto Maturana’s “The Tree of Knowledge: The Biological Roots of Human Understanding”. This is also about second-order cybernetics, more focused on how we learn, the science of knowing how we know. You know how someone telling you “two plus two is four” is meaningless, but if you add two and two, you get four, and now that has any meaning to you because you got to that realization through internal processes that organically lead to the answer? Ok, you know how it does jack shit to tell a depressed person to think happy thoughts, but if lived experience and rationale eventually leads you to “life is worth living”, then that a life-changing effect on you? Well, it’s got to do with techniques on understanding this process and being an active agent in doing this with others.
I dislike psychoanalysis but it is worth reading Freud’s stuff, especially to understand where all of this comes from originally, and the technique isn’t necessarily bad as much as it was a technique used in a place and time that is not where and when we currently live. Second-order cybernetics is something I especially like in psychology, because of how closely it relates to actual lived experience. A simple example is, if you throw a basketball to the hoop, you likely will miss, but your second attempt will be closer, and the third attempt, you’ll likely nail it. This is because the previous attempts have given you input and information that you then incorporate to throw more accurately. This is first-order cybernetics as you are the sole, individual variable, but imagine you have a coach, and the coach isn’t teaching you in a way that helps. The coach then changes their approach to suit your way of learning how to handle the element (ball), so the observed system (you, ball, act of throwing, hoop) is now changing, but so is the system observing entity (coach), as observer cannot be separate from observed system if aiming to meaningfully change it.
These should set you out to a good start, in my opinion.
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hms-no-fun · 2 days
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i have an intense love/hate with godfeels because it is beautifully written but it also makes me viscerally uncomfortable. something something disturbs the comfortable and comforts the disturbed probably. engaging with that discomfort teaches me more about myself and is definitely worth it for something like godfeels. any advice for constructively engaging with media that Pisses You Off, by no fault of the creator? what would you say to your haters in good-faith, if you could?
well, to be fair i have said plenty to my haters in good faith previously, but that was a very direct response. if you and i were having a polite conversation amongst the two of us, my first question would be "how far did you get?" godfeels has been going for six years now (!!!), and it's gone through many phases in that time. i'm at a point now in my life where if someone tells me gf2 didn't click with them, i'll probably nod and say "yeah it's rough around the edges, there's a lot of stuff i'd do differently today." the most vocal contingent of haters i've ever gotten were the handful of people who dipped at gf2.2 when june got superdrunk and accidentally murdered a bunch of people, assuming the story was going to be about how cool and based that decision was. anyone who's actually read gf2 to completion should find that misconception laughable. it also makes a difference if you finished gf2 and stopped there, or started 3.1 and fell off, or if you got through chapter 8 and fell off, or if you're currently reading Double Album. each of those is a slightly different conversation with its own pros and cons. whether or not i'd try to talk someone into continuing their read depends entirely on those questions (and also how self-confident i'm feeling in the moment).
i guess i would say to someone who is not enjoying godfeels that they should stop reading godfeels. it's an extremely heavy story that digs into a wide variety of traumatic subject matter. it is also deeply personal in a lot of ways, which is perhaps a weird fit for a Homestuck fanfiction. so i can understand someone from the wider fandom hearing about godfeels as "the June Egbert fic" being disappointed that it's not fluff. i've documented in the past how gf2 emerged out of my dissatisfaction with the image of "Hairclips June," whose transition exists off screen and whose acceptance by her friends is an obvious expectation. i kind of feel bad for how that shook out in the long term since, between the lengthy hiatus of hs2 and the broader strangulation of the post-canon movement during the pandemic, the canonical "Hairclips June" story (or at least "June Who Doesn't Suffer 100% Consequences" story) doesn't seem to exist. i don't mean literally canonical, i mean "seeped into the fandom's collective unconscious" canonical, like Detective Pony. there are plenty of fanworks that do a good or at least interesting job with June, but they're not *about* June in quite the same way godfeels is. it's entirely possible that such a thing DOES exist and IS popular (i freely admit to being out of touch with modern fanworks), but for better or worse godfeels still seems to be the thing that comes up most often-- and not always in a positive light.
for a while now i've been working on an "Author's Introduction" which on the surface is an attempt to contextualize the phases of godfeels for new readers, but in actuality is more of a history of/commentary on the post-2019 fandom and the so-called "Homestuck Renaissance." i see this as necessary because godfeels is an extension of that moment, in particular the loudly recuperative pro-Vriska boosters and their exquisitely galaxy-brained VrisRezi meta. then gf3.1 responded to the fandom backlash, chapter 8 responded to my experience watching every foundation of my post-transition life crumble during the pandemic, and then Double Album is an exploration of building yourself and community back up in the aftermath of tragedy.
it's not that this context is necessary to understand or appreciate godfeels, just that i think it helps put things in perspective. when i started gf1, i hadn't written fiction in nearly 7 years. today, the series is sitting just shy of the 500,000 word mark. at every step of the process, the quality and ambition of my writing has increased exponentially. there's a reason i've written Double Album as a jumping-on point for new readers-- besides being better in virtually every way that matters to me, it's also largely shorn free of the baggage that can make godfeels a hard sell for folks. whether or not it actually SUCCEEDS as a jumping on point is another conversation entirely.
so i guess all of that is to say, if we were having a private conversation just the two of us, i freely admit that godfeels is a wildly disjointed story on top of being extreme and often emotionally masochistic. i am proud of this work from start to finish, but it fundamentally is the process of its authorship in a way that a thoroughly drafted and edited novel simply isn't. i used to publish chapters the instant they felt done to me, with only minimal revisions. these days i let chapters bake a lot longer and put much more thought into how they fit into the larger whole. i kinda miss the old way but the new way results in much better work.
i'd be curious to hear what exactly it is that Pisses You Off about godfeels, and why you nevertheless feel it's a worthwhile reading experience. you ask me for advice on how to constructively engage with media that pisses you off, but i don't have any because in general i don't engage with media that pisses me off. i stopped reading fanworks after 2020 because everything that survived seemed to cater only to the sector of the fandom that harassed my friends out of their jobs and platforms. i found their interpretations/extensions of canon lacking, their tendency for straightforward fluff rather grating. i COULD have made that everyone else's problem, but what would be the point? i wasn't the target audience. i didn't enjoy the work, so i stopped reading it. i'd rather move on to media i enjoy than suffer through media i don't.
BUT. there's a fine line here, because it actually takes a lot to Piss Me Off. i don't really believe in rules or standards in art as Inviolable Laws Of Nature. my measure of whether something is good has a lot less to do with its inherent quality and a lot more to do with the balance between intention and execution. it rarely matters how amateur something is, if it meaningfully accomplishes the thing it set out to do then i'll probably like it (or at least respect it). i look for expressions of authenticity, moments where the artist and the medium are in perfect sync. there are plenty of critically praised pretty-looking movies and games with big production values that i don't particularly like. sometimes that's because they're a naked moneymaking enterprise disguised as art. sometimes it's a problem of too many cooks in the kitchen. and then sometimes an artist is just full of shit and doesn't really know what the hell they're talking about (i like to call these people "Californians"). mostly, i just embrace that art-making and art-viewing are inherently subjective experiences, and i find little value in numbered rating systems of any kind.
a lot of my favorite movies and albums underwhelmed me my first time through. they challenged me in a way that i at first interpreted as incompetence, but have come to see as brilliance. there's stuff i found alienating in high school and early 20s that i find deeply relatable in my 30s. as a film student i've had so many conversations with so many people who have wildly different takes on the same movie that i've completely given up on the idea that anyone is an objective arbiter of what's good and what isn't. the only real thing is if it works and if it works for you. i search for the best in everything, because at the end of the day i'm just here for the love of the game and i don't much enjoy hating things. for media to really Piss Me Off, to elicit a genuine I Hate You response, it has to be more than just, like, poorly edited or whatever. it has to embody a repulsive worldview, be a tool of jingoistic propaganda, or otherwise act as an extension of corporate greed and wealth extraction. these days i reserve my hatred for that which has connection to real Power and exerts a mass cultural Influence, or that otherwise blindly reproduces the same problems.
i think it's far easier to critically engage with work you don't like when you search for the things that work, rather than the things that don't. when it works, when it really clicks, you see what they were going for, and only with that perspective can you see why what doesn't work doesn't work. all i ever ask is for readers to take my stuff as it is, good and bad, and judge it on those terms. i find your use of "comforts the disturbed, disturbs the comfortable" funny and fitting. art that wants to be for everyone is art that cannot be for anyone. it is a perfectly round grey sphere that all who gaze upon it can agree "exists" and "succeeds at what it's trying to do." good art is imperfect, because it is the result of a perspective you may not share. i've never wanted to make art for the masses. i want to make the kinds of things that i wished existed when i was younger. there are a surprising number of people who feel that godfeels positively affected their lives, and i know that i have very little to do with that. godfeels is an object that exists in the world. i had ideas of what it was when i wrote it, but i can't control what anyone else sees no matter how much digital ink i spill trying to explain my original vision. if it truly comforts the disturbed and disturbs the comfortable, then on some level i must have succeeded in what i was trying to do even if the path to getting there was spotty and rough.
i did the best i could at every stage of writing godfeels. i would do things differently today, but i also wouldn't be here at all if i'd done it differently back then. i try to extend this grace to other artists as much as possible, that we're all just figuring it out as we go along. but i also know that everyone goes to art for different things, and finds value in different aspects of its expression. really, all i ever want is to have a conversation about the object without the looming specter of Respectability Politics and Moral Hazards. it's when people start acting like godfeels is Dangerous, and that i'm dangerous by extension, that i start having opinions about where critics are fucking up. tell me what it does or fails to do. point at the text and show me you've read and comprehended it by citing your sources and arguing through the text instead of around it. absolutely fuck off with the moral hand-wringing about Transgender Representation and Glorifying Violence and Perpetuating Toxic Stereotypes. it's a fucking Homestuck fanfiction, for god's sake.
but anyway you're not doing that, so, good job! i'm glad you find the experience of reading godfeels illuminating even if it pisses you off. i hope you found this lengthy answer enlightening, and maybe a bit annoying also. consistency is key, or so they say
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shehimin · 1 day
Text
Edgaring time!
Tutorial on how to make your own responsive Edgar :D I will try to explain it in really basic terms, like you’ve never touched a puter (which if you’re making this… I’m sure you’ve touched plenty of computers amirite??? EL APLAUSO SEÑOOOREEES).
If you have some experience I tried to highlight the most important things so you won’t have to read everything, this is literally building a website but easier.
I will only show how to make him move like this:
Tumblr media
Disclaimer: I’m a yapper.
Choosing an engine First of all you’ll need something that will allow you to display a responsive background, I used LivelyWallpaper since it’s free and open-source (we love open-source).
Choosing an IDE Next is having any IDE to make some silly code! (Unless you can rawdog code… Which would be honestly impressive and you need to slide in my DMs and we will make out) I use Visual Studio!!!
So now that we have those two things we just need to set up the structure we will use.
Project structure
We will now create our project, which I will call “Edgar”, we will include some things inside as follows:
Edgar
img (folder that will contain images) - thumbnail.png (I literally just have a png of his face :]) - [some svgs…]
face.js (script that will make him interactive)
index.html (script that structures his face!)
LivelyInfo,json (script that LivelyWallpaper uses to display your new wallpaper)
style.css (script we will use to paint him!)
All of those scripts are just literally like a “.txt” file but instead of “.txt” we use “.js”, “.html”, etc… You know? We just write stuff and tell the puter it’s in “.{language}”, nothing fancy.
index.html
Basically the way you build his silly little face! Here’s the code:
<!doctype html> <html>     <head>         <meta charset="utf-8">         <title>Face!</title>         <link rel = "stylesheet" type = "text/css" href = "style.css">     </head>     <body>         <div class="area">             <div class="face">                 <div class="eyes">                     <div class="eyeR"></div>                     <div class="eyeL"></div>                 </div>                 <div class="mouth"></div>             </div>         </div>         <script src="face.js"></script>     </body> </html>
Ok so now some of you will be thinking “Why would you use eyeR and eyeL? Just use eye!“ and you’d be right but I’m a dummy who couldn’t handle making two different instances of the same object and altering it… It’s scary but if you can do it, please please please teach me ;0;!!!
Area comes in handy to the caress function we will implement in the next module (script)! It encapsulates face.
Face just contains the elements inside, trust me it made sense but i can’t remember why…
Eyes contains each different eye, probably here because I wanted to reuse code and it did not work out and when I kept going I was too scared to restructure it.
EyeR/EyeL are the eyes! We will paint them in the “.css”.
Mouth, like the eyeR/eyeL, will be used in the “.css”.
face.js
Here I will only show how to make it so he feels you mouse on top of him! Too ashamed of how I coded the kisses… Believe me, it’s not pretty at all and so sooo repetitive…
// ######################### // ##      CONSTANTS      ## // ######################### const area = document.querySelector('.area'); const face = document.querySelector('.face'); const mouth = document.querySelector('.mouth'); const eyeL = document.querySelector('.eyeL'); const eyeR = document.querySelector('.eyeR'); // ######################### // ##     CARESS HIM      ## // ######################### // When the mouse enters the area the face will follow the mouse area.addEventListener('mousemove', (event) => {     const rect = area.getBoundingClientRect();     const x = event.clientX - rect.left;     const y = event.clientY - rect.top;     face.style.left = `${x}px`;     face.style.top = `${y}px`; }); // When the mouse leaves the area the face will return to the original position area.addEventListener('mouseout', () => {     face.style.left = '50%';     face.style.top = '50%'; });
God bless my past self for explaining it so well, but tbf it’s really simple,,
style.css
body {     padding: 0;     margin: 0;     background: #c9c368;     overflow: hidden; } .area {     width: 55vh;     height: 55vh;     position: absolute;     top: 50%;     left: 50%;     transform: translate(-50%,-50%);     background: transparent;     display: flex; } .face {     width: 55vh;     height: 55vh;     position: absolute;     top: 50%;     left: 50%;     transform: translate(-50%,-50%);     background: transparent;     display: flex;     justify-content: center;     align-items: center;     transition: 0.5s ease-out; } .mouth {     width: 75vh;     height: 70vh;     position: absolute;     bottom: 5vh;     background: transparent;     border-radius: 100%;     border: 1vh solid #000;     border-color: transparent transparent black transparent;     pointer-events: none;     animation: mouth-sad 3s 420s  forwards step-end; } .face:hover .mouth {     animation: mouth-happy 0.5s forwards; } .eyes {     position: relative;     bottom: 27%;     display: flex;   } .eyes .eyeR {     position: relative;     width: 13vh;     height: 13vh;     display: block;     background: black;     margin-right: 11vh;     border-radius: 50%;     transition: 1s ease } .face:hover .eyeR {     transform: translateY(10vh);      border-radius: 20px 100% 20px 100%; } .eyes .eyeL {     position: relative;     width: 13vh;     height: 13vh;     display: block;     background: black;     margin-left: 11vh;     border-radius: 50%;     transition: 1s ease; } .face:hover .eyeL {     transform: translateY(10vh);     border-radius: 100% 20px 100% 20px; } @keyframes mouth-happy {     0% {         background-color: transparent;         height: 70vh;         width: 75vh;     }     100% {         border-radius: 0 0 25% 25%;         transform: translateY(-10vh);     } } @keyframes mouth-sad {     12.5%{         height: 35vh;         width: 67vh;     }     25% {         height: 10vh;         width: 60vh;     }     37.5% {         width: 53vh;         border-radius: 0%;         border-bottom-color: black;     }     50% {         width: 60vh;         height: 10vh;         transform: translateY(11vh);         border-radius: 100%;         border-color: black transparent transparent transparent;     }     62.5% {         width: 64vh;         height: 20vh;         transform: translateY(21vh);     }     75% {         width: 69vh;         height: 40vh;         transform: translateY(41vh);     }     87.5% {         width: 75vh;         height: 70vh;         transform: translateY(71vh);     }     100% {         width: 77vh;         height: 90vh;         border-color: black transparent transparent transparent;         transform: translateY(91vh);     } }
I didn’t show it but this also makes it so if you don’t pay attention to him he will get sad (mouth-sad, tried to make it as accurate to the movie as possible, that’s why it’s choppy!)
The .hover is what makes him go like a creature when you hover over him, if you want to change it just… Change it! If you’d rather him always have the same expression, delete it!
Anyway, lots of easy stuff, lots of code that I didn’t reuse and I probably should’ve (the eyes!!! Can someone please tell me a way I can just… Mirror the other or something…? There must be a way!!!) So now this is when we do a thinking exercise in which you think about me as like someone who is kind of dumb and take some pity on me.
LivelyInfo.json
{   "AppVersion": "1.0.0.0",   "Title": "Edgar",   "Thumbnail": "img/thumbnail.png",   "Preview": "thumbnail.png",   "Desc": "It's me!.",   "Author": "Champagne?",   "License": "",   "Type": 1,   "FileName": "index.html" }
Easy stuff!!! 
Conclusion
This could've been a project on git but i'm not ready and we're already finished. I'm curious about how this will be seen on mobile and PC,,, i'm not one to post here.
Sorry if I rambled too much or if i didn't explain something good enough! If you have any doubts please don't hesitate to ask.
And if you add any functionality to my code or see improvements please please please tell me, or make your own post!
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thegamingcatmom · 1 day
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Helloooo, you asked for RE village asks.
What kinda pampering do you think Miranda likes? (Especially from an s/o)
I think she'd like having her wings massaged but only if she really trusts the other person.
YES HI HELLO
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I meant to answer you right away, but then I got distracted writing a lil smt about Miranda and her housewi-I mean assistant. It´s a one-shot, so it shouldn´t take all too long to finish, hopefully. 🤭
...And then I got distracted writing a lil smt about Miri the Workaholic, which you will find further down. 🤭
SPEAKING OF-
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(Someone´s very much looking forward to this one...)
First of: It is crucial to understand that I view Miranda as a rather...practical being. She´s not big into all that lovey-dovey stuff, simply because she prefers getting straight to the point. Everything else is a waste of time in her opinion, and while she does technically have all the time in the world (perks of being immortal), she quite lacks the patience for it.
Besides, she´s a workaholic. Ynow what has her undead heart soaring? Seeing her papers neatly organized in separate stacks. Bonus points if they´re labeled. 😩🤌
So, when it comes to actual pampering (as in: things you do to her), what immediately comes to mind is preening because that actually has a use, yknow what I´m saying? Yknow, plucking those loose feathers (gently, if you know what´s good for you), and keeping the good ones nice and clean. That may or may not include a bath.
(She does quite enjoy those, it has to be said. With or without feathers...)
But yeah, it´s not so much about what you can do to her, and more what you can do for her. (That also includes looking pretty for her btw.) Therefore-
Pampering Birb Momma would include:
keeping her lab nice and clean
just like her feathers
taking notes for her so she can do other stuff in the meantime (she´s a sucker for proper time management)
keeping her jewelry spotless (mask, handchains, etc.)
handing her tools, adjusting the light, anything she might need when she experiments on someone (that one might get a satisfied smile out of her)
awaiting/welcoming her when she gets home like a good little waifu
that will do wonders for her mood, especially when she´s had a rather tiring day with her "children"
bonus if you´re wearing an apron (they just...do smt to her, it´s all about that domestic stuff I´m telling ya)
polishing her cutlery (she has no use for it, but she loves shiny things)
(...she´s part bird yall, cmon)
luring ppl into her lab for her to experiment on so she can take care of other things in the meantime (it´s all about that time management, ppl)
bonus if you wrap them up like a present, bow and all
that will actually get a laugh out of her
(Miri has a rather dark humor)
applying her makeup (not that she´d ever admit it, but...that one drives her wild)
So ye, any kind of pampering is more related to how you can help her with her work because that IS all she does, basically. That´s what she lives for. However-
She could be persuaded into taking a break now and again. Perhaps. If you ask real nicely. Apron and all.
What I´m saying is: Don´t use words. She´s not listening anyway because she´s already knuckle-deep in her next specimen, mumbling to herself as if possessed. If you wanna get her attention, you have to demand it. Be the aggressor, yknow?
...Meaning:
HOW TO APPROACH A WORKING BIRB MOMMA 101:
(Participate at your own peril.)
Start by grazing the tips of your fingers against the feathers located at the very edge of her wings - known as the primary feathers. Go nice and slow, so as not to spook her. (Failing to do so could result in fatal consequences.) A light ruffling of wings or a flitting of eyes in your direction typically means your touch has been accepted. (Should you find yourself faced with neither of those things, don´t let that deter you! You´re still standing, which means your presence is tolerated regardless.) Proceed with firm but gentle precision as you slowly work your way to the base of her wings. You may apply slight pressure here and there, but make sure to keep your eyes trained on her face and posture at all times to avoid missing any signs of discomfort or unease. (Failing to do so could result in fatal consequences.)
Those signs could include:
a furrowing of eyebrows
a twitching of her jaw (typically a result of chattering)
a puffed up chest
a sudden and strong ruffling of wings, usually accompanied by a puffed up chest (a defense mechanism to appear bigger and more threatening)
a strong release of air through mouth or nose (resembling a hiss)
a low humming sound (resembling a growl)
in extreme cases: loud, harsh squawking or screaming
Body language is a primary form of communication for many species, and knowing hers is essential for survival.
By now, you should have reached the feathers located midway between the base and the outer wings - known as the secondary feathers. Those are more sensitive to the touch, so start by softly running your fingers along the plumage towards the base - your goal. Now, the same strategy applies: Be on the lookout for any signs of discomfort or unease as you move along. (Failing to do so could result in fatal consequences.) If you find neither of the aforementioned signs, you may also try and slip your fingers between the feathers. As those are more sensitive, your touch might evoke a stronger reaction, such as a violent twitch or a strong ruffling of wings. If that happens and it is not accompanied by a puffed up chest: don´t.panic. It is vital to understand that this isn´t a sign of discomfort, and showing fear or hesitation in such a moment could trigger a fight or flight response. Given the nature of her species, fight is the more likely reaction. (Which will most likely result in fatal consequences.)
This is why I cannot stress this enough: understanding her body language is crucial.
If you´re able to read this: good job! You´ve made it to the base - known as the tertiary feathers. Those are the most sensitive, so it is strongly advised to proceed with caution. (Failing to do so could result in fatal consequences.) If any pressure is being applied at this point, lessen it until the mere tips of your fingers are resting against the feathery coat. Due to the sensitivity of that area, you might notice a slight tremor - let it guide you! Tremors are a telltale sign of victory, so continue feeling for more as you draw closer to where wing and body meet. The trembling might become increasingly more violent the closer you get, so don´t let that deter you. On the contrary: you´re nearly there, so keep pushing forward! (Failing to do so could result in fatal consequences.)
You will know you have reached the spot when her wings begin to droop, as if gravity is gently pulling at them. Once that state has been achieved, initiate the ultimate checkmate by dancing your fingers along her spine - pressure optional. Proceed to watch in a mix of awe and self-satisfaction as her head tilts back and her eyes begin to close in complete and utter bliss. If you listen very closely, you might be able to perceive a low humming sound.
Got you.
Your hand finds purchase on her shoulder, but before you can apply the slightest pressure, she yields, sinking into the chair behind her with an irritated sigh that more resembles a hiss.
Someone´s angry.
If there is one thing she detests more than failures, it is resting when she could be doing something instead.
You saunter around the chair with a little more sway to your hips than usual before claiming all the space her lap provides to make sure she stays resting. Her muscles ripple beneath you, and you choose to ignore the fact she holds enough power to obliberate armies.
If she wanted to, she could throw you off with a mere flick of her wrist. But, alas...
Her icy blue eyes glint dangerously as she opts to stare at you with a mix of resentment and irritation, eyebrows furrowed and full lips flattened into a thin line. In fact, her gaze is so vicious that you almost believe she wants nothing more than for you to drop dead on the spot.
Almost.
If it weren´t for the fact her arms had wrapped around you as soon as you sat down.
"And what, pray tell, do you think you´re doing?"
How she manages to sound calm despite the storm clearly raging within her never ceases to amaze you. It used to terrify you.
A long time ago.
"Sitting," you reply with feigned innocence, even going so far as to throw your arms around her shoulders as far as the halo adorning her back would let you to settle in further.
"I see that."
...
"Cool."
Conversations with her are always so fulfilling.
"Why?"
Ah, there it is.
"...Why what?"
You can´t help it. Pushing buttons and testing boundaries has become your favorite way to pass the time. You blame the endless spiral of cleaning, and cleaning, and some more cleaning. You get that you have to contribute something, but your mind craves stimulation.
Hence you being a massive pain in her ass from time to time.
"Dove..."
Sigh.
She´s no fun when she has the patience of a boiling pot.
"You work too much…" you admit meekly, avoiding her piercing gaze as your fingers gently bury into the feathers closest to them.
"I wasn´t aware this was for you to decide."
Fair point.
"Well..." you sigh dramatically, making no move to untangle yourself. "If my presence causes such pain and misery for you, then I guess you can always just...let me go?"
Both of you are aware that you aren´t merely talking about her arms currently wrapped around you. They tighten their hold at the mere mention, causing you to risk a peek.
...
It takes everything in you to keep from grinning like the Cheshire Cat as the fold between her eyebrows deepens and the glint in her eyes transforms into an ominous glow.
Got you.
Again.
With slow and deliberate movements, your right hand shifts from the feathery prison of its own making to her face, where your index finger begins to smooth out the persistent crease between her eyebrows with gentle precision.
"I´m bored," you whine, uncaring of the fact you sound like a petulant child.
Now it´s her turn to let out the most dramatic sigh in history. "I´ve given you tasks-"
"Yeah, cleaning. Which I´ve done, by the way. Everything´s spotless."
A moment of tense silence passes.
"Don´t interrupt me, little bird."
Sometimes, you forget that she still scares you. And then you go and do something stupid.
Like interrupting her.
"...Sorry," you mumble, your finger trailing down the bridge of her nose, focusing on how perfect her skin is rather than acknowledging the weight of her judging gaze.
Another sigh fills the air before her hand catches your wrist, stopping your fidgeting and drawing your attention back to her words.
"As I´ve said..." she emphasizes, throwing you a pointed look that makes you want to go back to admiring her flawless skin. "I´ve given you tasks. Tasks that go beyond cleaning, as you well know."
You do know. And you’ve tried your damnest to avoid them since she gave them to you weeks ago.
"I...I don´t wanna..." you admit meekly before letting your gaze drift down to her necklace.
Her chest rises, lifting you slightly as she takes a deep breath - probably to keep herself from tearing your head off in sheer frustration over discussing this topic at least once a day.
You brace yourself for the worst, as always.
...
But it never comes, as always.
Instead, a finger rests against the underside of your chin, applying slight pressure to force you to meet her gaze.
It´s not the all-consuming fury you expected, nor the silent judgement you had grown accustomed to. Instead, it´s something far worse:
Disappointment.
"You don´t wanna?" she mocks you, the crease you fought hard to smooth out now back in full force as her eyebrows furrow in irritation. "Are you truly so selfish to deny me? To deny The Black God? We all must make our sacrifices, little crow. I have told you this time and time again, and I am tiring of this conversation. My patience is but a flicker, and you have long since extinguished it."
And yet, it's been weeks since she tasked you with the ultimate betrayal.
Or the ultimate proof of devotion, in her eyes.
"...Sacrifices?" you echo in disbelief, the temper you fight so hard to contain in her presence starting to rear its ugly head. "You´re asking me to send innocent people straight to their doom! People I´ve known my entire life! People I love!
You try to break free from her grasp, fully intending to storm to your room, lock the door, and remain there for the rest of the day.
You barely manage to stand before her arm shoots up, forcing you back down as it curls around you in a vice-like grip. You begin to thrash and push against her, but her other hand surges up to seize your throat in a firm hold, yanking you back towards her in one swift movement.
Her hold doesn´t hurt much, but it serves as a reminder that it could.
"Was it not you who wished for variety?" she hisses, her breath hot against your cheek. "Was it not you who wailed about setting foot outside again? Was it not you who wept for those pests to quench your thirst for companionship?"
Her grip tightens at that, reminding you of her possessive nature. She doesn´t show it often, but you know it´s there - lurking just beneath the surface, waiting to be unleashed.
"That is what is due," she snarls. "That is your sacrifice."
She releases your throat, but her arm remains firmly wrapped around you. You feel her piercing gaze drilling holes into the side of your head, daring you to oppose her again.
You say nothing in response as you keep your eyes trained on a speck of dust on the floor that you somehow missed, stubbornly refusing to meet her gaze. You know how much she despises that.
Being ignored, that is.
"Perhaps I´ve made a grave mistake by placing my faith in you, hm?" she continues in a low hum, trailing the back of her finger along your cheek. "Perhaps it would serve me better to have you strapped to my table? Transformed into my next specimen? Perhaps then you will discover a sense of gratitude for the position I´ve so generously offered you."
It´s not the first time she´s playing that card - trying to bend you to her will by threatening to make good on the promise she made all those months ago, when you first stepped out of line. Maybe that´s why, instead of fearing for your life as you probably should, all you feel is exhaustion.
You refrain from opening that can of worms, however. Despite all evidence to the contrary, you´re not that stupid.
Just like you refrain from addressing the fact that you were never really offered anything. An offer implies having a choice.
Instead, you continue to ignore her, your eyes idly scanning the floor for any more dust particles you might have missed. How can such a small space get dirty so quickly? It feels like once you’ve reached one end, you could start all over again. It´s ridicul-
A finger on your jaw interrupts your thoughts, turning your head to face her once more.
Her eyes are the only sign that you´re getting under her skin - that ominous glow is back.
"Don´t tempt me, dove..." she warns. "My tolerance for your perpetual insolence is tied solely to your more appealing qualities as a potential vessel, should I ever find myself out of options. Keep testing me, and that day might arrive sooner than you think."
You know you shouldn´t. You didn´t merely poke the bear today - you speared it. The best course of action now would be to keep your mouth shut, nod in humbled defeat, and hope you look convincing enough doing it.
But you´ve never been one to follow your own advice. If you were, you wouldn´t be stuck with the Devil today.
"...You think I´m appealing?"
...
There is a moment of silence.
And another.
And another.
The silence stretches on as you watch her watching you. Her eyes take their time mapping your face, scrutinizing every inch with a precision usually reserved for the unfortunate souls strapped to her table. You´ve yet to feel the hard wood pressing against your back or the cold leather cutting into your wrists and ankles, but you very much feel the raw power she radiates.
And then her eyes stop.
Her finger trails along your jaw towards your chin, where it lingers - tapping once, twice, thrice, as if considering something - before your jaw is seized between her pointer and thumb. She uses the hold to pull you closer, stopping only when the tip of your nose nearly brushes hers.
You can´t stop your eyes from mirroring hers as they dart down, fixating on her plush lips.
The breath catches in your throat.
"I think you have tasks to complete."
And just as quickly, it´s released again as you sink into her, your body deflating in a frustrating mix of relief and disappointment.
Only to feel disappointed in yourself for feeling disappointed in the first place.
And then you take the time to acknowledge her words, and a new wave of frustration washes over you. You know she won´t yield on the matter, but you can´t stop yourself from pushing it one last time.
"...Can´t I just...sacrifize a goat or two?" you sigh, fingers starting to fiddle with her necklace. A nervous habit of yours.
You´re surprised when, instead of finding yourself on the receiving end of one of her outbursts, a low, melodic chuckle reaches your ears. It´s a beautiful sound, and one you´ve managed to evoke only a handful of times since she bound you to her service.
You´re unable to stop the hope from blossoming in your chest-
"Insolent little bird..."
She says nothing more in response, and that hope wilts again like a dying flame.
This conversation is over.
With a heavy sigh, you release her necklace and begin the process of untangling yourself-
Her grip tightens.
You glance at her in confusion for a moment, taking in the slight curl of lips and the lidded eyes, before you realize-
They have yet to leave your lips.
The realization barely has time to settle before her thumb begins tracing your lower lip. Her touch is no more than a whisper, nearly prompting you recoil from the ticklish sensation.
Her icy blue eyes snap back up to yours then, keeping you rooted to the spot as her thumb continues to drive you mad.
It´s clear what she wants, but she makes it your responsibility to provide it. She always does.
Another way of proofing your devotion to her.
Your eyes stray downward in response and, at this point, you´re no longer ashamed to admit that the tantalizing sight clouds your mind almost instantly, pulling you in like a moth to a flame.
She always does.
Just before your lips brush hers, you´re hit with the compelling urge to seek out her gaze once more.
Her eyes are burning.
Then, suddenly, the world around you darkens, and your eyes just so manage to catch a glimpse of feathers before you´re plunged into total darkness.
Save for those burning eyes.
And then, you´re burning. Your lips have barely grazed hers before she´s consuming you, the restraint she´s shown until now discarded as she takes what is due.
...
It´s not the stimulation you had in mind, but you´re not about to complain. Lest she does make good on that promise...
At least you got her to stop working.
.
.
.
Any mistakes you might find: keep em. I was too lazy to read it back. 💀
Besides-
Since this will become the 1st part of (hopefully) many of my planned series (which is really just a way for me to indulge in my obsession for Birb Momma without having to worry too much about the plot), this version will probs undergo some tweaks and adjustments first before it´s released on ao3 too.
Hope to see yall there! 🐦‍⬛🖤
(The next part is already in the works. 🔥🤘)
.
THANKS A LOT FOR YOUR ASK! 💋
(Btw: I´ve been rewatching the part of Shadows of Rose where Rose meets Miranda to get some inspiration, and DUDE-
Miri´s eyes are positively crazy, I cant- 🫠❤️‍🔥
Also the way she breathes the words?? Yknow what I´m saying?? 😩🤌
Also also: TALL. 🫠)
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creature-wizard · 1 day
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So is realizing you were sexually abused as a child as an adult always false memories? Because I’ve been deciding if I should try to find a therapist about this if I ever get insurance and it’s like: 1: I don’t remember a Big Event, but a bunch of smaller, weirder things (being forced to undress around relatives, being watched shower that kinda thing) that seem to gesture to ‘probably got molested’, 2: I can’t create a Narritive of it, I only have flashes and a vague idea of when it probably started, 3: I had a terrible head injury at age 11 that was left untreated bc my parents refused medical care (long story, not a religious thing) & i don’t actually remember a lot from before age 10, what I do is consistent with those flashes, but 4: when you look at csa warning signs my child self had All Of Them.
I know false memories are a thing, I understand the science there. But I really don’t have the mental fortitude to be called a liar by another mental health professional. Spent a lot of high school begging the school psych to send child services to my mom’s house at least for my siblings sake and got told I should just be a better daughter. My sister’s a therapist & is always joking about how her clients ‘make up rape stories.’
So like: in your research did you ever come across adults realizing they were sexually abused that seemed legit or is it all cults and scams? Because I do think the trauma or whatever is negatively impacting my life and a big chunk of my mental illnesses but also. If I made it up I don’t want to be branded a ‘liar about their lovely father’
I think you’re doing important work, and please don’t feel obligated to answer this.
Oh gosh no, I wouldn't say that it's always false memories. It's always possible to have memories that you can't quite access because the neural pathways to them have become weak, and have something kinda jostle them later. I've experience this kind of thing myself on occasion (the memories didn't involve abuse, btw). It's just that when you go trying to force memory recall (such as through hypnosis), it's very easy to start confabulating, and exposing yourself to conspiratorial content can give your mind stuff that can get mixed in with memories of very real abuse and ultimately muddle what actually happened.
IMO, you shouldn't necessarily need to create a Narrative around these? It should be fine to just write them down and bring them up with a therapist, and tell your therapist what you suspect. It probably wouldn't hurt to bring up your sister's behavior, either. No good therapist is going to accuse you of lying (and your sister really should have her therapy license revoked).
Editing to add/clarify that dissociative amnesia is also a real thing! So like, yeah, it's entirely possible for someone have memories of trauma that their brain can't fully access because they were dissociating.
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superpyodan · 2 days
Text
This is a silly little thing I wrote of @clarisinne's Cringefail Farmer, my Kenny, and The Harvey Debacle™️. Seeing the fanarts inspired me but I wasn't in the mood to draw, so now this exists. It's very self-indulgent (because i am Obsessed with cringefail) but PLEASE... enjoy...
—————
‘’And then,’’ Clarice says, flinging her arms into the air dramatically, ‘’I felt his dick on my leg!’’
Kenny stops dead in his tracks and turns to look at Clarice, comically slowly. Really, he should have been expecting it. She asked him to go out for a ‘walk’, and despite how uncharacteristic it was, Kenny assumed she meant well. It’s a nice day — Maybe she just wanted to get some fresh air, or a break from her farm work. But, she hasn’t stopped talking about Harvey since the second she and Kenny locked eyes. Even when she’s not talking about Harvey directly, he still drips from her words.
‘’Okay? That’s- That’s good though, right? Or bad? Honestly, it’s hard to tell, with you.’’
‘’Uh, bad, obviously. Like - What the fuck do I do about that?’’ Clarice asks. She’s obviously flustered, but hiding it under a thick layer of feigned irritation. Usually, she’s feisty. A firework on the brink of explosion, a person born from the embers of a campfire. Her emotions don’t come out gently, and being abrasive is not something she shies away from. Kenny has seen this exact type of person a million and one times, and there is no way he’d believe that Clarice genuinely believes that she is in a bad situation. Difficult, maybe even a little embarrassing, but not bad.
‘’Was your real motivation for asking me to hang out, to ask for sex advice?’’ Kenny inquires, squinting a little. He figures it’s better to rip the band-aid off instead of dancing around the subject. With Clarice’s temperament, they’d get nowhere doing the latter.
Immediately, she goes bright red, a defensive look spreading across her face. Her instinct, Kenny assumes, is to immediately deny. They’re just friends, hanging out, and talking about friend stuff — Until they’re not. Something Kenny’s been forced to learn over the years is that sometimes, you need other people. Even if it’s embarrassing, or awkward to talk about, you need other people. He can be ‘other people’ for Clarice, if only she’d admit she actually wants help.
‘’Fuck no. Obviously not. I’m just- I’m just saying!’’ She exclaims, just as Kenny expected. So, he holds his palm up to her, preventing a continuation.
‘’No. If you want to talk about this, we can.’’ He assures. Clarice looks straight at him, frantic eyes transitioning into a softness, defensiveness turning into quiet nerves. Quickly, her intentions become clear. She did want to talk about it.
Clarice sighs, and collapses cross-legged into the grass. Kenny shuffles a little then lowers himself to sit in front of her, their knees touching.
‘’I tried to talk to Shane,’’ Clarice starts, ‘’But he was useless. He wanted nothing to do with it.’’
‘’Uh, yeah. Shane’s great at emotional support, but… Yeah. He’d never in a million years discuss sex with anyone. He caught me and Alex making out once and almost killed us and then himself.’’ Kenny reminisces, and it makes Clarice laugh.
‘’Do you fucking know what he said? He was like, ‘I wasn’t even aware Harvey had a dick before all this’, and then started yelling. And then I was yelling, and it was chaos, and I’m never fucking talking to him about anything ever again.’’ She explains, much chirpier than she was while telling the Harvey story. That’s the thing with Clarice — It’s important to match her energy. If Kenny doesn’t make it weird and awkward, she won’t either.
So, he giggles along with her, leaning back on his hands and allowing the sun to hit his face. ‘’Right, well, I’m not gonna yell at you. So, like.. Shoot. I know I seem kind of lame, but I do have experience under my belt, especially with men. Excuse the pun.’’
Clarice grins up at Kenny, before closing her eyes and taking a deep and contemplative breath. It’s a little strange, but he’s grateful that she’s willing to confide in him about something so personal. Sure, he doesn’t know Harvey very well. He can be a bit of a mess, and just as anxious as she is. If Clarice doesn’t get anything productive out of the conversation, at least she will have spoken. For Kenny, that’s good enough. He understands the importance of being able to get things off one’s chest.
‘’I just… Ugh. I don’t know how to go about this situation with him! I haven’t been in a relationship for so long, and like… I really like him. What if it gets ruined if we have sex? What if he thinks I’m a loser?’’ Clarice rambles a little, stumbling over her words, a dust of pink sprinkled over her cheeks. Kenny, however, furrows his eyebrows.
‘’Uh, dude. He got hard just from kissing you. I don’t think you need to worry about him thinking you’re a loser.’’
‘’Men are just like that, though! They’re easily entertained!’’ Clarice retaliates.
‘’Yeah, exactly. If anything, he’s the loser. Men are losers. You’re cool and pretty and literally don’t need to worry about any of that. As for the other stuff, though…’’ Kenny trails off, allowing himself a moment to really think through what he’s going to say. Sensitive subject, sensitive words.
For a moment, he thinks back to the beginning of his relationship with Alex, trying to pull inspiration and advice from that. he was cautious — Terrified of making Alex uncomfortable, terrified of something going disastrously wrong. But, neither of those things happened. They fell into each other very naturally, eventually throwing caution to the wind and exploring each other in a way that suited them both. It seems to have been the way in every relationship Kenny’s had.
‘’I think having sex with someone is something that just, kinda… Naturally happens, over time. If you feel the need to discuss it first, you will. If it just randomly ends up happening, as long as you’re both comfortable, then so be it. Just, go with each other’s flow, you know? I bet Harvey’s nervous about it too, but you guys will come around. It’ll work. And if it doesn’t, then you can just try again. God knows me and Alex had some blunders at first.’’ Kenny says, trying his best to articulate himself well. Clarice nods thoughtfully, but Kenny’s advice isn’t quite enough.
‘’But what do guys even like? I haven’t had sex in so long. What if I’ve forgotten how?’’
He tries to suppress it, but Clarice’s question makes Kenny laugh. Amusement born from love, but amusement nonetheless.
‘’Uh, you definitely haven’t forgotten how to have sex. You forget that humans have been having sex since literally the beginning of our existence. For most of us, it’s pretty hard-wired. You just need to get to know him, explore your options, even ask him straight-up. Genuinely — You’ll figure it out. I know you’re shitting yourself about it now, but, I can promise you with almost one-hundred percent certainty that it’ll be okay. Good, even.’’
Clarice unties the ribbon from her braid, then starts re-braiding it in silence, giving herself a moment to let Kenny’s words truly seep into her brain. It seems to be working — Visually, she’s less tense. Her face is softer, and her shoulders aren’t attached to her ears anymore. Kenny knows that his advice isn’t going to magically absolve her of her anxieties, but if her body language is anything to go by, it’s managed to absolve something. Something is better than nothing.
‘’So, what you’re saying, is that I need to get over myself.’’ Clarice concludes, retying the ribbon in her hair. Kenny smiles at her.
‘’Well — Maybe a little bit. It’s normal to be nervous, but like… I genuinely think you’ll be okay. And if you’re not, you know where to find me, yeah? And please. If you guys do have sex, I want to know all about it.’’
‘’Pervert.’’ Clarice remarks playfully. ‘’But, yeah. Thank you, Kenny. Seriously.’’
‘’Of course. Any time.’’ Kenny replies, soft and sincere.
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firewolf111 · 3 days
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Hello!! If you’re still doing these-
Could I maybe have like a Prinxiety one please?
Maybe angst and then a happy-ish ending, like the others are being jerks to Roman in just the canon-ish fashion, and he like gets upset (I headcanon, for example, that sometimes this happens and he goes nonverbal), and Virgil notices and kinda quietly goes to help him calm down? Idk just the first thing that popped into my head, if you do this, do what’s comfortable/what you want‼️
Thank you for reading this!! Have a good day/afternoon/night😁
Thank you for the request! <3
Took me a bit and turned out much longer than planned. But I hope you enjoy!
Also, I based Roman's troubles speaking off of my own experiences, so it may not be perfect.
Roman stands with his hands clasped in front of him. It's a basic meeting to discuss video ideas, yet his hands fidget with each other and he fights the urge to pace. Each flip of the page has him closer to giving in to that urge. The silence is loud, only interrupted by the occasional hum of thought and the flipping of notebook pages. He is on the verge of giving in to the need to break the silence when finally someone speaks.
Logan: None of this is usable.
Roman: *freezing as his blood runs cold* Pardon?
Logan: I said, none of this is usable. Were you too distracted by your frivolous daydreams to listen? That would explain the lack of quality in this work.
Patton: I'm sure it's not that bad.
Silence once again returns as Logan hands the notebook to Patton. Patton flips through it. His expression is one of hesitant disappointment. The truth is in his eyes, though it is clear he is reluctant to admit it. He hands the notebook to Janus, who until then was watching the whole thing with an unamused expression, opting to check his gloves instead of even bothering to look in Roman's direction.
Patton: Hey, Jan? What's your opinion?
A small anger flickers in Roman's chest briefly before sputtering out. He shouldn't be surprised that Patton is asking for Janus's opinion instead of offering his own. It means he can simply agree without having to be the one to break the bad news. It's a familiar dance, though it didn't use to be Janus he would ask, he had become the most common side he'd ask recently. He wishes Patton would just outright tell him he is a disappointment instead of playing the good cop, bad cop game he does.
Janus: Hmmmm. Logan is right. None of these are useful. Best to toss them and start again.
Roman: But-
Janus: There isn't much argument to make. It'd be quicker to just start over than to try and fix these. The viewers do expect a video soon. I doubt you'd want to disappoint them.
Roman: Well, no-
Patton: Well, there we go. Problem solved!
Roman: Hold on-
Logan: I expect the new ideas by the end of the week.
Janus: Well, this was eventful.
Virgil: *glancing between Roman and the others who have began packing their stuff up and preparing to end the meeting* Hold up guys-
Roman: You're not listening to me!
Everyone freezes and looks at him. Surprise quickly gives way to frustration, disappointment, and annoyance.
Logan: Now you don't need to throw a tantrum.
Roman: I'm not throwing a tantrum!
Janus: Mhmmm. Clearly not.
Roman: Well, it's not my fault you guys are out here talking about my ideas when you don't know what it takes to make them. You wouldn't know a good idea if it knocked on your door and introduced itself.
Patton: Now, Roman, let's play nice.
Logan: *scoffing* Clearly, you're the one who doesn't know what a good idea looks like if you think this *Gestures to the notebook* counts.
Roman: Do you know how long I worked on those?
Janus: Hm. Clearly not long enough.
Roman: You stay out of this, snake!
Patton: Roman!
Janus: Well I may be a snake, but you're the one throwing a hissy fit.
Roman: I am not throwing a hissy fit!
Patton: I mean...you kinda are. But that's okay! You're upset that your ideas aren't as good as you expected them to be. Of course, you're upset. But how about we channel that energy into something more productive.
Roman rubs his palms against his pants. Leave it to Patton to treat him like a child. He wants to scream. He wants to cry. He wants to run and hide. He wants to show them what a tantrum really looks like. His eyes remain on Patton's. He doesn't move or speak. He remains quiet, like a good little child.
Virgil: Guys. Don't you think you're being too hard on him? Surely, they weren't that bad.
Roman: Thank you, my violent violet.
Virgil: No problem. Though, don't let your ego get too big. Your singing is still annoying.
Roman: *rolling his eyes* At least I can sing. You sound like a dying cat.
Virgil: *opening his mouth to retort* Oh yeah. Well-
Patton: Roman! Now that was rude. Apologize.
Roman: What?
Patton: You heard me. Apologize.
Logan: And perhaps apologize to the rest of us for the time waste. Especially since you can't seem to be bothered to stay on topic.
Roman: But Virgil-
Patton: No excuses, mister.
Virgil: Guys. It's fine. I'm not at all offended. Besides, I was the one who pulled him off topic.
Logan: That's kind of you, Virgil, but Roman needs to take responsibility for his own actions.
Roman: *sighing* Fine. Virgil. I'm sorry for insulting your singing. I do actually quite like it. And I'm sorry for getting off topic and wasting your time.
Logan: Good. Now, back to the discussion. You are going to have new ideas by the end of the week. Correct?
Roman: But-
Logan: And these ideas will actually be usable and decent?
Roman: *swallowing* Of course, but-
Janus: *scoffing* You might be asking too much of him there, Logan.
Roman: *glancing at Patton, who says nothing*
Logan: Maybe. But does this sound agreeable to you, Roman?
Roman takes a breath before he becomes aware of the fact that his tongue feels like lead. He goes to speak, but only air comes out. He begs, not again, not now.
Logan: Well?
He tries. All he has to do is force the words out. He's done it before. Just force the words out. No matter how hard or uncomfortable. He manages to get his throat to move and his mouth to form the words, yet his vocal cords refuse to work. He can talk. He knows he can talk. He has forced himself through this before. It's all in his head.
Janus: I think you hurt the Prince's feelings and now he's giving us the silent treatment.
Logan: *sighing* Real mature, Roman.
It takes a few times, but he manages to get a few words out
Roman: sor- *he swallows and takes a deep breath* sorry. Was lost in thought.... *he takes another breath* I'll have it done by the end of the week.
Each word feels like it was dragged through his teeth and forced from his mouth, but he got it out. He can speak. He was just being over-dramatic. It doesn't matter if he had to force every word and overthink each syllable. He can speak. He just has to stop faking.
Logan: Good. Glad we figured that out. If that's all, I believe we can finally call this meeting to an end. An actual end this time.*He gives a pointed glare at Roman*
Roman just simply nods. He doesn't think he could argue again even if he wanted to. As everyone leaves, he heads to his room. Too wrapped up in his thoughts and the weight on his tongue, he doesn't notice Virgil's concerned looks as he walks away.
The door gets looked behind him as soon as he is in the safety of his room. He flops onto his bed and curls up into a ball under the blankets. He should start on coming up with new ideas, but he doubts he could focus at that moment. He'll start tomorrow.
The silence sits heavy in his mouth. It weighs down his tongue. He swears he can feel it slipping down his throat and curling up uncomfortablely in his chest. The silence converges on him. It squeezes his head and drills into his ears. It weighs heavy on his shoulders. Silence runs through his blood and veins and he hates it. Hates the way it feels tangible on his skin. He wants to claw the quiet away, to force out the words if only to get rid of this feeling.
He remains in his misery for 5 minutes, though it felt like an eternity, before there is a knock on the door.
Roman opens his mouth to respond, he isn't sure whether "come in" or "go away" would have been what came out, but it doesn't matter as nothing comes out. He exhales and opens his mouth to try again before deciding it isn't worth the energy. He reluctantly stands and opens the door, mentally preparing himself for a lecture from Logan or a "I know you can do better" speech from Patton, or even just some simple mockery from Janus. Yet, what greets him at the door is none of those things. It's Virgil.
Virgil: Do you mind if I come in?
Roman is tempted to turn him away, but he longs for the company to drive away the silence. Especially if it's Virgil. So, instead, he steps back and gestures Virgil in.
Virgil: *entering and watching Roman close the door* Are you okay?
Roman opens his mouth to speak, wanting to assure Virgil he is fine. He just has to force the words out. He can speak. There is nothing keeping him from speaking. He has forced himself out of moments like these before. He just has to speak. Just speak. Force it out. Suffer through it. Just. Speak.
And he almost manages to force out the words before Virgil stops him, realization clear in his face.
Virgil: You're nonverbal right now, aren't you?
Roman shakes his head. Because he isn't. He can talk. He's just being over-dramatic. There are people who are actually nonverbal or semi verbal. He was just being over-dramatic. He can talk, which means it isn't actually him going nonverbal or having a verbal shutdown. He can talk. He can. He just has to force it out. But he can talk.
He opens his mouth to tell Virgil that much when Virgil beats him to it.
Virgil: *opens his mouth, ready to argue before shaking his head* Okay. Do you want to talk right now?
Roman pauses. Was not speaking actually an option? Forcing words out seems like so much energy and it wasn’t the most comfortable. He wouldn't necessarily mind not talking. But would Virgil be okay with that?
Roman: *shrugs*
Virgil: That's okay. You don't have to talk if you don't want to. Do you want me to stay?
Roman: *nodding without hesitation*
Virgil: Okay. Do you want *he holds up one finger* silent company,*he holds up a second* comfort, *he holds up a third one* or a distraction?
Roman: *flips between two fingers and three, torn between the two options*
Virgil: Both comfort and a distraction?
Roman: *nods*
Virgil: Okay. How about we cuddle and watch a movie?
Roman: *considering it for a moment before nodding*
Virgil: Disney?
Roman: *giving him his best "do you even have to ask" look*
Virgil: *understanding the expression and chuckling* Fair enough
It doesn't take long for them to get the movie on and to curl up under the blankets. Roman ends up curled up against Virgil's chest, one of Virgil's hands carding through his hair as the other holds him close. As the intro plays, Roman can feel the heavy weight of silence slip off his skin and he no longer feels the need to force himself to speak. The room is filled with music from the movie. He breathes a deep breath and feels at peace, even if his tongue still remains lead in his mouth. He simply whispers airy whispers beneath his breath as the first song plays. He doesn't bother forcing himself to hum or sing or even bother making the words into something more than a simple breath. He just let's the quiet rest gently on his tongue, and he is at peace.
He doesn't need to speak. Virgil understands.
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kaytub · 2 months
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the house fixation is so strong they're actually making me draw irl people now
anyways is this anything guys
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