#you apologize to take accountability
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Rekindling a friendship (bad quality :( sorry!!)
#chloes speech is deliberately scattered#doesnt rlly follow a flow yk#she doesnt know how to apologize#the ppl who owe her an apology (ie her parents) wont#and everyone else just apologize to her out of fear#chloe is mentally ill and is a teenage girl#peeople should be less hard on her#but some people should also be more hard on her#find the balance#her apology might rekindle her friendship w adrien#but not with others#and thats ok!#you dont apologize for forgiveness#you apologize to take accountability#it wont heal wounds but it could work as an ointment#mlb#miraculous ladybug#chloe bourgeois#chloé bourgeois#adrien agreste#sabrina raincomprix#nino lahiffe#sneak hehe#not a ship post gangalang#progression au
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my heart dropped when i read the statement that sm put out re: taeil, genuinely the last thing i expected to read today. i’m shocked, disappointed, but most of all- i’m angry.
angry at what he’s done, angry at seeing some fans defend him, angry at those turning this into a gotcha moment to promote or lift their faves up. please, this isn’t just some discussion on the internet- there is a very real victim, a very real woman at the heart of all this. i hope she gets the justice and healing she deserves.
#apologies for coming in and dropping this#ik i havent written in a while#truly i have not been in the best emotional state but i needed to let this out#this is an issue that hits close to home to me and i just feel sick to my stomach at the news#always ALWAYS believe victims#goes without saying but moving forward i will not be supporting taeil#it’s a piece of a much bigger picture in how south korean women are being treated#i’ve been seeing a rise in the digital space of them raising awareness and advocating against the sexist rhetoric and harassment they face#i know this is an au account BUT very real women are being affected. real life will always take precedent over silly little brainrots#morals before kpop always#anyways sending love and light and hugs to those who need it#esp the czennies / taeil biased that are disheartened and disappointed#don’t feel guilty for having once supported him- we were all blindsided by the idol persona#idk when ill be back. truly need a bit of a mental health break#but ill see you all again soon <3
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Do you think if the trolls all came back, like everything in the main comic did happen and they were alive again. Do you think Feferi would actually forgive Eridan? Or want to even be his friend after everything? I don't personally like the erisol and fefertasprite interaction…felt rushed…..so I just wanted to know your opinion if things were different! :)
Yeah, I think they would be! Feferi is one of the trolls who takes dying the least badly (relentless optimism) and Eridan does genuinely feel bad, which means a lot when it's Eridan. I think she really is genuine when she says she wants them to be friends and also that she's really not the type of person to hold a grudge, and like... death is SUPER cheap in Homestuck, it's really not the horrific, irredeemable, irreperable damage that it is IRL - and if you're talking about (Feferi) and (Eridan), then they're both dead (and irrelevent) now, so the score is kind of even.
In general, the fandom - I mean, people in general, really - tend to have difficulty divorcing themselves from other people. We tend to assume that the people and characters they like will hold similar opinions to themselves. This is how people who like Karkat and don't like Eridan can mentally gloss over or even block out their clear, close friendship, or how people who dislike Cronus can end up overlooking that Meenah actually takes his opinion seriously and unironically defends his wizard thing. Feferi really isn't mad at Eridan or upset about dying the way we probably would be, because she's friends with the horrorterrors, relentlessly cheerful, comfortable with death in general, and death is also just not really that big of a deal in this setting. "I'm really sorry about that, that was shitty of me" is honestly probably all the apology she needs, especially if they came back to life anyway.
#i dunno in general the fandom loves to blow stuff up#and make it all way way angstier than it needs to be or was even shown to be#by all accounts feferi takes dying really well#im sure shes still not STOKED to be eridan's friend again but out of all her faults#holding long unreasonable grudges isnt really one of them#(that's a kanaya thing actually)#eridan's always gonna be an annoying pest to her in large doses but i think she basically thinks of him as a friend#also eridan responds to problems overwhelmingly with Fight#so this idea that eridan will be forever mopey and angsty also doesnt ring true to his character#if anything i can see him becoming annoying again because now he won't stop fucking apologizing#like bro chill its fine already oh my god why is everyt)(ing suc)( a PRODUCTION wit)( you#because thats the last point too like#homestuck always returns to humor#hussie even says in the book commentary that homestuck is lighthearted and comedic at its core#that it keeps returning to that as a touchstone#even during its tensest moments like murderstuck theres just constant funnies and gags#so i just end up going kinda :/ when an interpretation is purely maudlin or cathartic#like its more homestuck when its funny and characters treating murder with the same gravitas as irl#not only doesnt make sense in universe where death is cheap - ESPECIALLY for trolls#but also just doesn't really feel very homestuck to me#but that is 100% personal taste so if you like that stuff by all means keep enjoying it lol#you just arent going to get uber angst from me u_u
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for all our days and all our trials // the damen/laurent wedding fic
captive prince | rated E | 40k | post-canon | laurent pov | character study | worldbuilding | half sex, half politics (often at the same time) | a soft absurd future fic
When Laurent set out to plan a royal wedding between two 1) men, who are 2) actively ruling kings, of 3) tenuously peaceful lands, with 4) widely-known reasons to have killed, or possibly 5) still kill each other, he expected the process to come with a few difficulties. He did not expect getting his perpetually amorous new husband aroused on their wedding night to be the hardest of them. (Or: ‘Not in front of the court,' said Laurent, as if this were unspeakably foolish, 'in front of the Council.’)
Read on AO3.
it's here!! it's done!! after three years of sporadic work, it's finally out in the world!! 😭😭😭 i may be biased but this is my favorite thing i've ever written and i'm so excited to finally share it with everyone!!
big huge thanks to @ming85, @delilahsdaydream, and @i-am-a-story-goblin for responding to my call for betas two years ago; y'all's suggestions made the fic way better than it would've been otherwise. (a round of applause especially for ming85, who saved an ancient tapestry from the horror of grass stains and generally made the wedding event much more kingly than i, in my infinite unwordliness, had intended to.)
thanks also to @damiaanos for being my wall to bounce things off of more recently as i finally committed to getting this thing done no matter what. legitimately don't know how i would've managed it without your excellent balance of "you can do it" and "it's fine, stop stressing". if any other perfectionists are reading this, find people like that, they're great.
shoutout to @slecnaztemnot for throwing me the idea of putting Loyse on the Council when i had been stuck on the fifth member for a year, and gratitude to @kingsrising for being a visible fandom hub that i could turn to when i needed community and had no idea where to look for it
fandom is the best and i'm really excited to start being a more active part of capri's
as i mentioned, i've been talking about this fic on tumblr for over two years, so i will now proceed to tag every person who interacted with either of those posts, on the off chance that they would appreciate receiving an update on this fic that is now a real thing that they can go read (if they wish to, obvi)
from the kingsrising ask: @ladykyrin, @afantasyghost, @gildedgaze, @westealtoys, @timburtonknewmyoceans
@plushdragon, @blue-eyed-korra, @foreverskies29, @bumblebee-whiskey, @stardust-at-midnightt,
@brinkleyheights, @lavendercoded, @meraki-ii, @nonothatsano, @not-a-coral-snake
and from the call for betas: @caeli-phantomhive, @laurents-laces, @jaks21, @auroralunasoleil, @captaindamianos
@airebellah, @certainbirdkitty
@marrieddorks, @i-want-delfeur, @morgenti, @goose-fish, @farrukh-schumann,
@theoverlyenthusiasticwriter, @p1n4ta, @deleteitold, @lovelovelove, @hennike
@nczakiis, @theoraclephobetor, @angelshineyourlightonme, @naisvalta, @pienenpienileppakerttu,
@aristosakielon, @foreverfraancis, @fangirlfortress, @whynotme12, @naturaldisaster,
@gutstrings, @dreamerthief18, @aladybetween2majors, @k04, @burntpercy
#captive prince#laurent of vere#damianos x laurent#lamen#damianos of akielos#captive prince fic#mine#my writing#ok TAKE TWO let's try this again#apparently tumblr prevents new accounts from appearing in tags or mentioning people#which seems like a reasonable tactic to prevent spam or w/e but i kinda WISH I WOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT before posting this the first time#so apologies if you've been tagged twice i promise i'm not trying to spam you i'm just 97% sure nobody got a notification a week ago#anyway so far the response to this fic has been incredibly lovely <3#someone said my writing was 'exquisite' so. y'know. *flips hair*
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the plagiarist posting an "apology" to creators, including myself, who he has ripped for months on end despite us asking him not to while he still has us all blocked is... a choice
#to echo mercymaker:#some of us are literally on mobile#also by 'apology' i mean a statement that is still more about saving face and spreading even more lies while making a pathetic play#at trying to garner scraps of sympathy from the people still supporting him#rather than truly accepting wrongdoing and taking accountability#saying your friends had to tell you to formally apologise and you didn't think it was worth it bc it would fall on “deaf” ears while having#us blocked is already not a great start#and any play at sincerity falls apart the moment you try to pretend you didn't actually do what you did#i have to quote one of my friends here:#trying to STILL pass the hands set off as a coincidence/accident is as bold as it is stupid and disgusting when it was a frame for frame#rip off right down to the scene arrangement#frames and caption#with the greater context of having also stolen almost *all* of my other larger concept sets#it's absolutely insane to me i'm ngl esp considering that this is supposed to be an 'apology'#what are you even 'apologising' for at this point if you are still trying to deny what happened? getting caught?#once again this just goes to show how sincere his 'apologies' truly are#this one is about as worthless as the first from months ago to minthara + mercymaker#text: personal
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i couldnt stfu about it so here it is again;
(theres more under the cut)
I made 2 version for the llojavi ones bcus im not sure which one looks better.. or just more appealing looking
AAAND heres Alicia :)
..... i'll make more soon . i just have a bit of an ava/m brainrot rn༼;´༎ຶ ༎ຶ༽
#teh talks#senart#tged stickfigure au#dear God you take one look at how i draw stylized stickfigures and can tell that i hail from rhg#Im writinf a personal apology to anyone who follows me on my main account . all i could talk about rn is stickfigures
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I love it when characters realize their mistakes and apologize.
Because there is nothing wrong with admitting that you are at fault when you realize that you have been mistaken.
#kei's mumblings#gabi braun#gabi#aot#snk#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#Anyway#I'm not saying that Gabi is innocent#if I can hold Reiner accountable for his crimes#I can do the same with Gabi#But I think the good thing with their characters is that they learn#even if it takes time because brainwashing doesnt get undone at the drop of a hat#the important things is that they acknowledge their shortcomings#and are able to realize where they've gone wrong#and do something to make amends for them#that takes guts and courage to admit your faults#to bow your head and apologize when you otherwise would have not#I think that kind of growth is relatable#and something that I admire regardless of whether it's a trait possessed by a fictional character or a real person
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Which version of this do you prefer?
See tags of original post for further notes
#so the books *are* a series#and some of these adaptations have sequels or prequels#however because whether a given adaptation covers multiple books or doesn't is quite variant#so I'm not listing things as series/groups in the case of either the books or the adaptations that have sequels/prequels#just because it kind of changes what the original source material is (to take all the books into account)#and I'd probably need to leave off adaptations that are only the first book#or are looser adaptations#doing it this way lets the poll be more inclusive of more versions that I'd like to list#and you can kind of take sequels into account as you would like#I also thought about including the 1956 version but I cannot find clear confirmation of its current availability#also I apologize if 1985 is slightly mislabeled and is in fact a tv film and not a miniseries#I'm seeing conflicting labels and its been too long since I saw it for me to remember the specific format#polls#tumblr polls#adaptation polls#anne of green gables#anne shirley#lucy maud montgomery#anne with an e#lm montgomery#anne of green gables 1934#anne of green gables 1979#akage no anne#anne of green gables the musical#anne of green gables 1985#anne of green gables the animated series#anne of green gables 2016#books#films#animation
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part of the process of learning to take responsibility for your actions is learning what things you can't take responsibility for. not just to protect you (e.g., from your own feelings of guilt; from people taking advantage of your willingness to take responsibility by attributing blame to you unfairly), but because to take responsibility is not just to say "it was my fault and i'm sorry" but to actually do things (to make amends and to mitigate and prevent future harm), and if you don't understand what to take responsibility for, you aren't going to understand how to take responsibility.
there is a lot that's outside of your control. people put a lot of emphasis on forgiveness in a way that i think is missing the point. being forgiven is not my priority. my priority is that i am doing what it is in my power to do. i can't control how that's received. i'd like it to be received well; i'm doing what i'm doing because i want to repair harm that i have caused to another person, so it matters to me if what i'm doing is actually achieving that goal or not. but there's only so much that i can do to achieve that goal, and if i'm doing it, and the harm is not repaired, that's okay. that's beyond my control. i have to make my peace with the fact that i've caused harm to another person that is not resolved, because i'm doing what i can and i have to continue living on this earth, and in continuing to live i'm going to be living with the fact of that unresolved harm. the most important thing at that point is for me to use my knowledge of the specific ways in which my actions harmed that person to change my behavior going forward to avoid causing that harm again, to the extent that that's within my power.
it doesn't do anyone - you or the people you have harmed - any good for you to assign responsibility to yourself for things that you can't control. if you're going to attempt the active work of repair and change you have to first identify what it's possible to repair and change. you can't actually repair a relationship all by yourself! you can only change your own behavior. you can only offer amends to the other person that they may or may not find sufficient. not to go all serenity prayer on you but guilt for the sake of guilt just makes you feel way more powerful than you actually are (because you think that everything happened because of you) and at the same time completely incapable of exercising your power (because you don't understand what your power actually is). to effect change you have to focus on the things you can actually change. focusing on the things you can't change is a problem not just because it's taking your focus away from the things you can change, but because it means you don't actually understand the sphere of your own influence. you're operating under what is essentially a self-centered worldview in which you could make everything better, you could prevent all harm, if only you were trying harder, if only you were a better person. who does that serve? it doesn't reflect reality. it makes you hate yourself and feel sorry for yourself at the same time, and it doesn't actually improve things for the people you harmed. it doesn't help keep you from harming people in the future, because you don't understand the territory and the limits of the causal relationship between your actions and other people's reactions to them.
you can only do what you can do. what you can't do, you can't do, and you can't take responsibility for doing, either in the past or present. after you realize that there is harm to repair the next step in the process of repair is to ask yourself what your responsibility is for the past and what your agency is going forward. everything else will follow from that. you simply cannot skip that step.
#this is so hard to think about and talk about because it's so nebulous. it's comforting to have some hard and fast rule instead#'take responsibility for the harm you have caused' sounds good but what does it actually mean?#you are responsible for your harmful actions. you can't be responsible for the actual feelings of other people#it obfuscates what you can actually do. which makes you think that you are both all-powerful and#powerless to make amends or change#but adding any nuance to the discussion just sounds like apologism. and could easily be used by bad actors (e.g. abusers)#to justify their completely insincere attempts to apologize and change#accountability#responsibility#restorative justice#guilt#learning and growing#apology#forgiveness#wow i have a lot of tags relevant to this haha#my posts#you can tell i gave up on sleeping and got out of bed because of the absence of typos which means i have my glasses on#fare thee well to my theoretical night of restful sleep. hello day before me that i have to navigate on three hours of sleep and#terrible head neck and shoulder pain :/
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Title: Rokurou repays a debt
Artist: Katsura ichiho
Source : Tales of Berseria Comic Anthology (DNA Media Comics), Chapter 10
Nb pages: 8
Link: Full res on imgur
#tales of berseria#eleanor hume#rokurou rangetsu#rokunor#(i hope tagging this as ship is ok? i think it's pretty shippy but....)#borrowed the info format that was oft in use on taleslations i hope that's fine aaah aaaaah#i just think it's neat#undescribed#this is like from 3 years ago originally i had a link to the imgur page on my twitter account#but then somewhere down the line that account got suspended for inciting violence against the CEO :/#so i thought hey maybe tumblr's the better place for it!#anyway this is like#baby's first mango translation for me#that takes me back; i was really unqualified to do this back then!#(i still am)#konslating#apologies for how rough and amateurish this is#i dont know japanese#you know the drill#(power move on my part to link to the artist's twitter with my unauthorized translation and reposting. if i die i die)
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i guess im never fucking posting mcyt again bc that's like the 5th wilbur supporter that's been in the notes of that little pig drawing
get the fuck away from me, this isn't "discourse" or "fandom drama" anymore he's just an abuser
#might as well make your damn url ''i love abusers''#''i dont take victims seriously'' ''my support is all performative bc my favorite man comes first''#his 'apology' was just him admitting he really did all that shit. WHAT do you see in him#even his friends dont support him DROP HIS ASS!#anyways GOODNIGHT i cant sleep -_-#keep checking socials to distract myself a bit and all it makes me wanna do is delete this account lmao
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and while i’m on the topic, it’s insane how much time the reunion spent belaboring how hard it has been for sam since the show has been airing and like. respectfully. this is not a case of a bad edit. this is just natural consequences. this is cause and effect. if you behave like a piece of shit, people are going to treat you like a piece of shit. if you go on a fucking netflix show and behave like a piece of shit on an international stage, soooooooo many people are going to know what a piece of shit you are and all of those people will respond to you accordingly. like, are people right to be cyber bullying him? maybe not. but did he invite this? absolutely. don’t try to get me to feel bad for the man. i’m not going to feel bad for him.
#love is blind uk#also the fact that he stated unequivocally on the reunion i’m not a bad person when he was supposed to be apologizing???#number one who are you trying to convince us or yourself#number two hey buddy i see what your priorities are here. i see what message you want the audience to take away#number three just like i’m not gonna trust anyone who has to explicitly tell me to trust them#i am also not going to believe someone is not a bad person just because they’ve announced as much#no accountability. just talking points#the absolute lack of self awareness is entirely baffling#i want someone to drop kick him into a dumpster#love is blind uk reunion
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Teddy Bear halfway (actually, a little over) check point. I have pulled myself out of my full life disassociation to take a break. I moved a little into episode 9 because episode 8 ended with the lead up to Nut's birthday and this was clearly going to be important.
They had been giving all the flags about Nut's childhood. It wasn't that his mother just picked his father and they had a happy little life, albeit not with the man she loved. No, Nut's childhood was not great. And as with many people with childhood trauma, some of it culminated around his birthday.
It was really satisfying to have Nut get the recognition from his mother that she had been passive and selfish in more than just the recent years of her mental illness. We all know this won't wash it all away completely, but it was healing start for the both of them.
And all of this is happening while Nut is opening his heart to Tofu. There is way too much "I'll stay with you forever" for my liking because I haven't been fully spoiled, but my sense is Tofu's time is limited and he will not be with Nut for the long term (at least in this particular manifestation of himself).
I'm feeling pretty satisfied that most of my thoughts about where this was going have been revealed to be true. An indication of good writing, for certain. It's the same reason why I know Tofu can't stay. Despite the beauty in how Tofu and Nut have started to love each other, it is a fantasy love. Tofu has no needs, except to be close to Nut and love him. That isn't how love between people works. This show is entirely about how messy it is to love each other because people are complex and flawed.
Still Tofu's love is incredibly important to this story. The love he gives Nut is unconditional. He has seen all the worst of Nut, seen all the messiness that is in and outside of him and his love has not faltered. You can see it healing Nut in real time on screen and it's so beautiful.
Even between complicated people, you can experience radical love like that, it just isn't all you get. It comes along with the messiness of life. Nut isn't ready for that though. He hasn't experienced that uncomplicated love before, that unwavering love, even though I know his mother has that kind of love for him, she wasn't always able to put him first. Tofu does that for him. Nut finally gets to experience that.
I've paused in part because it feels like this is when shit is going to really get real. It's a bit counter intuitive since we've already trudged through a lot of trauma, but we still have half of this drama to go and we have not unpacked most of what happened with Tarn.
Knowing that @lurkingshan and @twig-tea have said this is a happy ending makes me want to get to know Tarn more. I have to believe that Tofu is some sort of manifestation of his love for Nut and that Tarn will wake up and he and Nut will get a chance again to heal from whatever went on between them.
#the miracle of teddy bear#I have so many complicated feelings about all the characters#I was starting to want to yell at Nut for how much he was punching Tofu#thankfully Gen yelled at him and also Nut has apologized#Nut's reactivity makes sense when you see the father he was raised with#but he needs to also take accountability in understanding that about himself and growing past his pain so he can love others too#It hits so many soft spots as someone who has not always had the easiest relationship with my parents and wants to do better with my kids#I think I feel like I need a break honestly to just sit with it all
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While I hop through all of my art wips, have this ship chart I made for nordegrim!
#these are mostly based on my headcanons so take that into account when looking at this#feel free to make your own version for them if you have different headcanons for them :]#I’d love to see different interpretations of their relationship#for once in my life I actually finished one of these#probably because I’m not trying to make it look fancy#btw the Neil sketch is one of my favourite drawings I made of him#the sketch’s were made for another one that I never finished so why not reuse them here!#I also added the song I associate with them the most here cause music heavily influences my headcanons and other fan stuff i make :]#not too mush though might I add#I put both of the ages they canonically have cause i didn’t know which one to put down#apologies for my somewhat messy handwriting :}#gotta say this cause it is a bit hard to read sometimes#scott pilgrim#anyways I’m gonna stop rambling in the tags now so it doesn’t turn into a paragraph#or a very long one at that#scott pilgrim comic#scott pilgrim takes off#young neil#neil nordegraf#stacey pilgrim#nordegrim
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this is probably gonna be super incoherent but I'm currently thinking about how throughout all of Chain of Memories, the traitor duo is portrayed as less sympathetic than the basement trio even though the guys in the basement are for the series's token Evil Organization and Marluxia and Larxene are against it. the enemy of my enemy is not my friend
they're all villains but they've got their own conflict going on. one side takes action, the other side tries to pick up the pieces; one side aims to hurt sadistically, the other only hurts because business is business; one side gets what's coming for them, the other side begs for their lives and apologizes and gets stabbed in the back in ways that make you go "wow, that was messed up. this game is for kids?"
both Marluxia and Larxene are killed by the protagonist with no remorse, while Vexen, Lexaeus, and Zexion are all taken out by people who you'd think would be on their side. isn't that clear divide so fascinating
#kingdom hearts#chain of memories#organization xiii#larxene#marluxia#vexen#zexion#lexaeus#thinking about them today as you can probably tell#this is not accounting for gba com lexaeus#who doesnt apologize to anyone and doesnt get killed by ansem and tries to take riku down with him#for the other points though i have sources i can cite#me post
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I keep trying to write an update and then being embarrassed about it and feeling like I’m trauma dumping on people by updating and I just..I know it’s on me to manage my crap, I know. I am trying (not very well but I’m trying) and it’s just…I don’t know. I don’t even know.
#please know i have thought about hospital but hospital would#genuinely make it worse (like I cannot even tell you how much worse)#i think I’m legitimately just…having a trauma reaction on top#of a jewish trauma spike#and dentists and having to move (I may have cleaned till I shook today also my arm#does not look great#i feel like i don’t actually verbally have the words#(i have tried not engaging i have tried engaging they both feel awful)#(hashem i don’t know would you even embrace me would you…)#(it’s not a meds thing (I take meds for mdd and I know what that looks like and this isn’t it)#(it’s hard to explain the difference between CPTSD and like a panic attack or a depression)#(except that I feel like I’m so so tainted and not in my body or if I’m in my body I’m in my body somewhere else#abuse cw#i didn’t ask for this cptsd and no tshirt was offered#this will disappear probably#UGH#(i am seeing my therapist tomorrow i just..i know i need to reach out to)#(to like my current landlords and ask if I could just pay for a cleaning service to come in)#(i know i need to be like ‘unfortunately my CPTSD is Fucking Terrible Right Now and I need)#(just a bit of grace apologies)#(i do not want my parents to know i do not want that)#(aside from the fact that I am already a burden to them anyway)#a stupid flop of a person i am crying thinking about how i had plans for kids and a wife and travel and…I’m nothing#(everyone else is something I’m not I don’t deserve grace lbr)#it keeps running through my head how many people i thought loved me want me dead#and it’s like I can fake it so well#(i don’t know I may be like sending words to people)#to run through the steps of not being alone#i’m truly sorry i am always not taking accountability and playing the victim and clinging to people#to get reassurance i don’t deserve that its a good person it isn’t it isn’t a person
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