#you and your bros are my minions now

[keferon]

Isn’t Vortex a fucking torture freak tho? 👀👀👀

Yep. He is. He is a lot of things actually. The more you learn about him the more fucked up it gets

[sharlsworld]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ parents these days - 𝐋𝐍𝟒 𖤓

（ 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 ）𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗑 𝗅𝖾𝖼𝗅𝖾𝗋𝖼 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

（ 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 ）𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌𝗇𝗍 𝖺 𝗋𝖾𝗀𝗎𝗅𝖺𝗋 𝖽𝖺𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗈𝗅 𝖽𝖺𝖽，𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗆 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾

𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 ✫ 𝗂’𝗆 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝖺 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 𝗋𝗇 𝗀𝗎𝗒𝗌 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗆𝖾 😭

🝮

landonorris

liked by pierregasly and 1,982,446 others

landonorris we miss our mommy

georgerussell63 Who left you in charge of a 1 month old and a 2 year old?

⤷ landonorris i’m their dad??

⤷ georgerussell63 And??

yn i miss my boys too 🥹🥹 & don’t forget to pick up mathéo’s ointment

♥︎ by author

⤷ all4lando she’s such a mom i love it 😭

francisca.cgomes our??

⤷ landonorris she was my mommy first

⤷ francisca.cgomes you’re disgusting

joris__trouche Justice for Malachi 💔 0.5’s are not his friend 😞

⤷ yn are you implying my son doesn’t look cute joris?? 🤨

⤷ joris__trouche Nonono you and lando make the most beautiful babies in the world

leclerc_pascale My boys 🥰 We need to gave a family dinner soon

⤷ landonorris YES PLEASE i’m in need of your pasta right now

⤷ leclerc_pascale Come over and bring the boys, I just made some

⤷ landonorris already in the car

arthur_leclerc i bet they miss uncle art so much 🥰 i’m coming over right now dw

⤷ landonorris i’m locking the door

⤷ arthur_leclerc girl…i have a spare key

⤷ yn since when?

⤷ arthur_leclerc me & charles snuck in when you guys were sleeping 🥰

⤷ charles_leclerc Hey don’t expose me

🝮

yn

liked by oscarpiastri and 3,331,747 others

yn back with my boys 🤍

landonorris first

leclerc_pascale Have fun on your date night!! Love you two 🤍

⤷ lorenzotl Not to much fun though, I don’t need another nephew right now

⤷ arthur_leclerc seriously do you guys ever just lay in bed?

⤷ landonorris i am incapable of that you’re lucky we’re not on baby number 6

⤷ arthur_leclerc oh!

maxverstappen1 Pussy whipped

⤷ landonorris damn right

charles_leclerc Finally he wouldn’t stop calling me to tell me he misses you

alexandrasaintmleux The sweetest baby boys 🥹 I love them so much

⤷ landonorris woah now i’m a devoted and loyal husband to y/n alexandra

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 😐 blocked

carlossainz55 I miss my nephews I will be over soon to kidnap them ❤️

⤷ yn sounds great los 🫰🏽

⤷ sharls_leclercussy “los” i’m crying 🥹

danielricciardo Gurl boss ✊🏽

🝮

landonorris

liked by georgerussell63 and 1,128,632 others

landonorris moms such a party pooper 💔 she wouldn’t let me paint the boys yellow and dress them up as minions

charles_leclerc Do you all just lay in bed all day? And do nothing?

⤷ landonorris would you like it to be just me and y/n in bed alone doing something?

⤷ charles_leclerc I will come sleep in between you two lando norris

mlnmarta Chiara misses Mathéo & Malachi!! We need to visit soon 🤍

⤷ yn yess come over!!

georgerussell63 We must make this happen I can’t get the image out of my head

francisca.cgomes hot mama 😍😍🥵

⤷ landonorris real she can spank me anytime she wants

⤷ mclaren Please do not make us take over your social media again Lando.

yn i’ll put you in timeout

⤷ landonorris please do 🫦🫦

🝮

yn

liked by susie_wolff and 3,435,189 others

yn my babiesss 🤍 living my dream

carmenmmundt So happy for you baby 🥹 You’re so cute I miss you

⤷ yn carmen ilysm 😭💝

alexandrasaintmleux Seriously though, our shopping date when? 🤨🤨

⤷ yn tomorrow 😫

francisca.cgomes MILF MILF MILF

⤷ carmenmmundt MILF MILF MILF

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux MILF MILF MILF

⤷ lilymhe MILF MILF MILF

⤷ lilyzneimer MILF MILF MILF

⤷ landonorris MILF MILF MILF 🤤🥵🍆🍑

landonorris let me put another baby in you please please please mommy 😈😈😫🍆

⤷ yn lando…we’ve talked about what’s appropriate to comment and what’s not

⤷ mclaren Come on bro 😔

⤷ francisca.cgomes take away his social media rights‼️‼️‼️

leclerc_pascale My beautiful girl and her beautiful family🥰

lilymhe ok period aesthetic queen

haileybeiber literally my pintrest board

carla.brocker i miss you sweet girl 💕

⤷ yn i miss you we need to have a sleepover soon 🥹

⤷ flowers444yn y/n still having sleepovers as a wife and mom of 2 kids is so on brand

landoslove this post was for the girls

⤷ landonorris don’t forget lando 😍😇🥰

🝮

landonorris

liked by mclaren and 3,892,715 others

landonorris Enjoying Barcelona with my family ❤️

arthur_leclerc yk it’s not lando because he’s using auto caps

thisistotallynotlando they didn’t take away my burner account 🤣🫵🏽 i can’t be stopped

♥︎ 1,729,143

alex_albon free lando till it’s backwards ✊🏽

pierregasly YOU WILL BE AVENGED LANDO

georgerussell63 This definitely sounds like lando 👍

oscarpiastri Very convincing

slutmeoutlewis they actually took over his account again 😭😭

hoeforsainzzz justice for lando

thisistotallynotlando not gonna be a little family for long 😈

lordperceval petition for lando to get his account back ✊🏽

♥︎ by alex_albon and 1,113,648 others

🝮

yn

liked by patrickdempsy and 3,790,631 others

yn do you wanna play mermaids with us?

alexandrasaintmleux My love 🫦🫦

beloved.hamilton where are mathéo & malachi at??

⤷ yn with their dad 😊

carmenmmundt My mermaid tail is purple

oscarpiastri Come back down lando can’t talk to you cause they took his phone and he’s tweaking

⤷ sharls.eclair THEY TOOK HIS PHONE 😭

francisca.cgomes damn ma

leclerc_pascale Beautiful girls ❤️

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 🥰🥰❤️

⤷ yn thank you maman 🤍

charles_leclerc My girls ♥️♥️

⤷ yn ♥️

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 💋♥️

mclaren i miss you baby - lando

⤷ maxverstappen1 LMFAO GIRL 💀

⤷ sharls_lerklerk max?? 😭

landosfootfungus where’s lando’s comment?? 😪

⤷ yn he’s in social media jail rn

lilymhe SO GORGEOUS UGH 😫

georgerussell63 The last slide is actually lando and y/n is you guys didn’t know

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux Actually 🤓☝🏽

🝮

landonorris

liked by tomholland2013 and 5,167,765 others

landonorris 3 weeks of good behavior and i got my account back. and what did i do in those 3 weeks of good behavior? i got my wife pregnant again 😊

arthur_leclerc sick bastard (i’m so excited)

lorenzotl I jinxed it 😪

yn baby girl norris?? 😇

leclerc_pascale Can’t wait to meet my new grand baby 🥰

alexandrasaintmleux yayaya so happy rn

carmenmmundt You two make the cutest babies it’s not even funny 🥹🥹

francisca.cgomes YESYESYES SO EXCITED

joris__trouche Crazyy congrats you two 💞

maxfewtrell Leave that poor girl alone

carlossainz55 UNCLE CHILI 🌶️❤️

flavy.barla Awhh so happy for you two 💗

ciscanorris Another one! 🩵🩷

charles_leclerc WHY DO YOU DO THIS?? MY BABY SISTER?? JUST LAY IN BED AND SLEEP ONCE IN A WHILE OH MY FUCK

⤷ lilymhe anways…CONGRATULATIONS 🥹

🝮

yn

liked by krisjenner and 7,762,831 others

yn matthew senna norris 🤍

comments on this post have been limited

landonorris i love you baby thank you giving me everything i’ve ever wanted and more ♥️

⤷ yn i love you more

⤷ landonorris i love you the most

alexandrasaintmleux baby matty 🥹🥹

leclerc_pascale Another boy, are we surprised? He’s the cutest boy in the world

georgerussell63 Coming over now

carmenmmundt Stopp how cute 💗

charles_leclerc Je t'aime ma petite étoile

⤷ sharlsworld “i love you my little star”

arthur_leclerc project senna

mclaren Future world champ 🧡

lorenzotl Maybe another one isn’t so bad

oscarpiastri Malachi is barley 2 months old??

⤷ landonorris i want a football team. it’s not my fault my wife is so sexy and i’m horny 25/8???

francisca.cgomes auntie kiki is coming baby!! 💓

lilymhe cutie boy 🥹🩵

maxverstappen1 Now get a vesectomy lando ❤️

♥︎ by landonorris & 2,223,841 others

[hkpika07]

Get ready for me exploding in the tags

what's everyone's favorite mario character?

[banj0possum]

Alistair x (platonically) Teen Reader

In the fic he is like oh my god a bride, he walks in and instead of an adult..or a bride-

They find a teen, who literally threw a pebble at him, an angsty teen💀

I’m very happy to read ur fics and usually pair them with teen/child mc because I find it funny because they expect the love of their life

and teen mc standing there :🧍‍♂️

anyways sorry for the long request, luv ur writing, and ur art :D

Yandere! Evil King x Teen! GN! Reader

CW: platonic relationship, Alistair is a bit of a DILF so do with it as you will, Dads are hot you guys!! READER IS A MINOR.

👑 Who is this sassy lost child?

👑 His minions kidnapped you while you were on a carriage ride back to your kingdom.

👑 He was hoping for like a princess or something to marry and take over the kingdom with or whatever so like...what tf he gonna do with you???

👑 Clearly you were too young to be in a situation like this, but theres no way he's giving you back without a reward, so yes he still holds you for ransom.

👑 "Child, I am Alistair, King of-ACk!"

👑 Did...did you throw a pillow at him?!

👑 "How dare yo- AHK! Stop it!" another one..

👑 You refuse to listen to anything he says, you just wanted to go home

👑 You two had a bit of rivalry for a bit. He hated you and you hated him.

👑 He promised not to show any affection or care towards you since in his eyes, your actions didn't deserve it. How can someone be so rude to a king !?

👑 But he starts to notice you don't eat much. He never sees you in the dining hall and has only seen quick moments of you nibbling on some bread or pastries the servants gave you.

👑 He scoffed, so irresponsible! You must eat a proper meal right this second or you'll starve!

👑 You're surprised to see a meal prepared for you during your routine trip to get a snack from the pantry with a note on the plate.

👑 "Next time, ask for a proper meal. I don't want your parents to think I've been starving you. -Alistair P.S. go to bed early."

👑 Huh...

👑 Alistair smiled from the doorway of the dining hall, watching you eat up with a smile on your face. You might have been too scared of him to ask for food so you've been sneaking snacks while he wasn't looking.

👑 Of course he wasn't doing it because he cared about you, he just didn't want royalty like you to resort to such pathetic means to eat!

👑 Why are you still sad? Perhaps he should get you some things to keep your attention..

👑 He asks (threateningly may I add) about your hobbies or interests.

👑 The next morning your cell (which has been upgraded to a lovely room in the castle because he didn't want you to be filthy and gross in a dungeon) was filled with anything he could find that he thought you'd enjoy.

👑 Don't think he wants you to be happy! He's just tired of seeing you sulk everywhere!

👑 He denies everything, but you swear you could see a tiny smile on his face when you hugged him happily.

👑 You start being a little more open to him, showing him anything you've made or done with pride and he'd receive it gratefully, but he won't show it of course.

👑 "I made you this friendship bracelet!"

👑 "I've seen better jewelry."

👑 "Oh I'll take it back then I guess.."

👑 "No, it's mine now, back off."

👑 Drawings and the like that he said would be thrown out as soon as you left would be seen framed in his room

👑 It would be a..waste of good canvas..

👑 And of course he buys a few books of your choice for you to read, he'd be damned if your brain turns to mush.

👑 Bro bro he'd be the type to let you swing around while holding onto his bicep.

👑 If you ever have any problems, or come to him in a bad mood, he'd have no idea how to help other than to sit down and listen to your troubles.

👑 He's not the most physical when it comes to affection, but you bet your ass he's gonna do everything he can to cheer you up.

👑 At this point he's rewriting his demands for the ransom. Either your kingdom lets him sign some adoption papers or he's starting a war.

[xxkissesforchanniexx]

𝐒𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐭𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧

Pairing: Seungmin x fem!reader (college au) Genre: fluff IMPLIED smut hehehe Word Count: 2.9k Warnings: jealous seungmin implied smut, player hyunjin, drinking, party games, making out

A/N: This request is really new but bro code is actually frying my braincells as I'm tried to string together the plot sooo this is my rescue.

You were bickering with your friend, Felix as your professor entered the classroom.

"Settle down class." The teacher said. "I'm going to hand back your tests now."

You perked up at this.

"Best score." Felix nudged you and you hummed.

"The top score was a 97%," your teacher said, taking one last look through the tests. "Oh excuse me. 100%," She stared at the paper for. a moment and raised it, "Kim Seungmin."

Your mood crumbled. "Of course." You muttered.

The dark haired man smiled at you and walked down for his test. He took it and smiled as he went back to his seat. "#1 is really a pipe dream, huh, Y/n?"

You gripped your notebook tightly and exhaled slowly.

"L/N Y/N." Your teacher held out your paper and you grumbled as you went to collect it. Staring daggers at Seungmin you crushed your test into your bag as you sat.

Felix got called a moment later and came back to sit, beaming at a 79%, "As long as it's not a fail." He smiled.

You hummed softly. "You wanna go get food?"

He nodded and you got up to leave, as you packed your things, a lot more neatly than you had your test, Seungmin came up to you.

"It's an A right?" He shrugged. "Maybe next time."

You looked at him. "You really revel in seeing me anger, don't you?"

He raised a brow and fixed his glasses. "Yeah," he leaned in close, breath grazing your ear as he whispered, "I adore it."

You wanted to throw our bag at him but Felix dragged you away before you could do anything. You and him walked to the cafeteria, scanning around the food selections before deciding to eat off campus.

You were about to exit the cafeteria before someone squealed and you turned. Chris and his minions had entered the room. The men looked around before sitting at a table and one, a man with long dark hair, Hyunjin, looked at Felix then at you, then back at Felix before waving slightly.

Felix waved back and smiled. "Hyunjin is really so nice no? Come on I want chicken." He dragged you out of the cafeteria, you looked back just in time to see Hyunjin watching you. And you smiled.

You had finally found a seat in the library, sitting with your textbooks ready to study, you cringed a you realized you left your tumbler in your last class. You got up to get it and ran off to get it, but when you came back you sucked in a breath to see your things by the door of the library. You picked them up and went back to your seat lip pressing into a thin line at the sight of Kim Seungmin sitting in your seat typing away on his computer.

"Seungmin." You said.

He looked up, "Can I help you?"

"You moved my things. I was sitting here."

He smiled. "Those were yours?" He knew damn well they were... "Sorry, but there was no one sitting here."

"KIM SEUNGMIN-" You started before glaring at a book he had on the table, bookmark sticking out innocently. You grabbed the bookmark and threw it, making the man lose his page.

"Y/N!"He stood, fuming.

"Was that yours? I didn't realize." You took a sip from your tumbler and walked away. As you left the library you looked at your phone, and crashed into someone. You stumbled back, dropping your phone and literature textbook, a few of your papers cascading around the sidewalk. "Sorry." You muttered, going to pick up the things.

"It's fine." The guy said, kneeling to help you pick up your stuff.

"Thank you-" You looked up at Hyunjin as he handed you the stack of papers.

"No problem." He nodded, tilting his head. "You're Yongbokkie's friend?"

Your mouth opened then closed.

"I saw you earlier." Hyunjin clarified.

"Oh. Yeah! I'm Felix's friend." You took the papers and opened your textbook, tucking them carefully in between the cover and the first page.

"I'm Hyunjin..." He extended his hand out to you.

"Y/n.." You fumbled with the stuff you were carrying for a moment before shaking his hand.

He smiled slightly. "You need help?"

"Uh... Yeah." You laughed in defeat as he took the textbook from you.

"Where're you headed?" He asked, walking with you.

Seungmin bit his lip as he watched you walking to the cafeteria with Felix and Hyunjin. When did you entertain people like that? A guy who was a notorious player? A guy who made other men look away from you with one glare? A jerk like that? With you? Since when?

Seungmin thought nothing of it until he saw Hyunjin waiting outside of your class that afternoon. He tapped his pen against his desk, anger boiling as you came out of your class and Hyunjin put an arm around you, sweeping you away.

"Seungmin?" Jeongin tapped his friend's shoulder, before looking and seeing you and Hyunjin. "Just tell her."

"How?" Seungmin muttered.

"I don't know. But it looks like Hyunjin might actually be serious about her."

"Is Hyunjin serious about anyone?" Seungmin rolled his eyes. "I don't want him to mess around with her too."

"Then get to her first."

"HOW?!" Seungmin groaned.

"I don't know!"

Seungmin walked down the hall and sighed. "He's not good for her."

"She looks good right?" Hyunjin asked his friend, Chris.

"Very nice." The older man nodded, looking at the picture.

Changbin looked over his shoulder, "Isn't that the nerd?"

"She's fine though! Bin look." Hyunjin showed the shorter man another picture.

"You think she's better than the last one?" he asked Hyunjin.

"Of course," Hyunjin shrugged. "It's always the nerds."

"I bet 50 bucks I'll get her before you." Chan said, looking at Hyunjin.

"Not fair."

"Come on... You scared?" He challenged.

No... Hyunjin thought, I just don't want you fucking her over... "Nah. Bet 100."

"Greedy." Chan rolled his eyes. "You got it. At least introduce us. Level the playing field."

"Y/nnie." Hyunjin said, hands in your hair as you sat between his legs on the floor, munching on your chips while watching something on the TV.

"Huh?" You looked up at him.

"You should meet my friends." He smiled.

"Why so suddenly?" You popped a chip into your mouth.

Hyunjin turned your head to the TV, "Don't do that with your head back, you could choke. But I just feel like you'd fit in with them, y'know?"

You made a face and actually almost choked.

"Woah, woah-" Hyunjin handed you your drink.

After a few gulps you looked at him. "Me? The schools nerd girl? Fit in with you jocks?"

"Uh- Well-"

You turned and looked at him, raising a brow.

"That's not the only thing they say about you.."

Your eyes widened. "HUH!?"

"Nothing! Never mind. I just think you'd like to meet my friends though." He turned away, ears red.

You hummed. "Okay. I'll see."

"Yes!" Hyunjin did a small jig before smiling at you.

You rolled your eyes. "When do you think I can meet them?"

"Well there's this party..."

"It's only right that the best guys in school," Jiwon said, twirling her hair around her finger.

"Yeah." Minsi added, smiling at Seungmin and Jeongin.

Jeongin looked at Seungmin before whispering, "We're the best guy on campus?"

"Not just you two." Jiwon sighed. "Changbin and Hyunjin are going to be there too. And Chris!" She and her friend squealed.

"Hyunjin's going." Seungmin hissed to Jeongin.

"Y/N might go too!" Jeongin hissed back.

"When's the party?" Seungmin smiled.

"Friday night. Fraternity house."

Seungmin hummed. "I'll be there."

"Yeah." Jeongin nodded, "We'll be there."

"Awesome!" Jiwon and Minsi clapped their hands before going off somewhere.

Seungmin saw you in the hall a while later and cornered you when Felix went to class.

"Y/n." he called.

You looked back and made a face. "Seungmin."

He pursed his lips. Tell her.. "Can you not look at me like you despise me?"

"But I do." You pouted slightly and rolled your eyes.

"You know I see why Hyunjin would go for you. Your ego is just as big as his and I really hope when he's just messing wwith you, you stop your power trip." He snapped before he could stop himself.

"Go fuck yourself Seungmin." You started walking away, something about him saying that tearing your insides apart.

PANIC! He thought, Save it! "Y/n!"

You looked at him.

"He's going to hurt you..." Seungmin said quietly.

"I'll trust him until he does." And you left him standing there..

You were sitting on the couch in Hyunjin's apartment, staring blankly at his TV.

"Something on your mind, pretty?" He asked, sitting next to you.

"Not really.." You muttered.

"Y/n.." He faked a crying face. "Did I do something??"

"No-" You started, "Well yes-"

His brows furrowed. "What?"

"Are you messing with me?" You asked bluntly.

"Why are you asking so suddenly?" His eyes narrowed.

"Well some dick sad something..." You sighed.

"Who?" He asked, sitting up straight now.

"It's not importan-"

"Who?" He pressed.

"Kim Seungmin." You relented.

He looked at you for a long moment. "Don't believe him... Why would I ever hurt you y/n.."

You smiled at him slightly.

He hugged you and smiled. "I'm not messing with you..." I like you too much...

Seungmin was studying in the library when he heard the library volunteer girl shriek.

He looked up and was met with the dark gaze of Hwang Hyunjin.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

"What are you telling Y/n?" Hyunjin stared at Seungmin.

"It wasn't a lie." Seungmin shrugged.

"Kim Seungmin." Hyunjin slammed his hand on the desk and glared at him.

"Hyunjin." Seungmin stared up at him.

The people were gathering now, looking around the shelves at the men.

"Stay away from Y/n." Hyunjin said lowly.

"But I saw her first so-"

"You think Y/n is just something you can see first-"

"You think Y/n is something you can just fuck and drop. Hwang Hyunjin. Steer clear of her?" Seungmin snapped back, standing. "Or I don't think you'll like me."

"Are you threatening me?" Hyunjin moved to grab Seungmin's collar.

"What do you think?"

Hyunjin was about to punch him when hi phone rang. He paused and took it out before smiling at Seungmin. "Guess who's calling." He turned away and pushed past the people who had been watching while he answered the phone. "Hey Y/nnie."

Seungmin felt his stomach twist.

When Seungmin and Jeongin got to the party, the latter was almost immediately dragged away by his friend Beomgyu, leaving Seungmin alone in the party.

It was that same solidarity that led him to Lee Minho, who according to Jiwon who Seungmin had met earlier was "10000% boyfriend material". Seungmin couldn't deny the man was fun to be around though, Minho introduced him to a living firecracker, Jisung, who was apparently very close friends with your "friend", Hyunjin.

After a few drinks, Seungmin felt his head going fuzzy but he only shrugged it off laughing. While watching Jeongin chugging his 9th red bull on a girl, Sumin's, request.

"We're going to play Seven Minutes in Heaven." Jisung said, following Minho to the basement, "Gonna join?"

"Sure." Seungmin said before realizing what he'd agreed to. It's the liquor talking...

Seungmin and Jeongin followed Minho and Jisung down the steps into the small space under the house where a few people had gathered to participate in the game.

He sat down on the floor, next to Jisung and Jeongin as everyone settled. Then he saw you, giggling with another guy, not Hyunjin but-

"Chris. That bottle empty?" A man with freckles and long bleach blonde hair pointed to the wine bottle behind the man you were with.

"It's glass, like hell I'm going to trust you with it., Yongbokkie." Chris rolled his eyes and tossed the blonde man a plastic two liter soda bottle.

He caught it and sat it in the middle of the circle as you and Chris sat, closing the circle. Hyunjin bite his lip, staring at you and Chris like he wanted to fight the man.

"Okay, you all know the rules." Felix said. "Changbin who should start?"

"Not it." a short, muscular man poked his nose.

"Not it." Felix followed.

Seungmin's brain took a moment to process what had happened but by the time his finger touched his nose everyone else had already made it to safety.

"You good sir," Felix said in very sophisticated accent. "Start the game." He handed Seungmin the bottle.

Hyunjin's eyes met his as he spun the bottle.

It turned once.. twice.. three times before slowing to a halt.. pointing right at you.

Seungmin looked at you.

"INTO THE CLOSET!" Jisung shouted.

"Come on let's go!" Changbin opened the door to the small closet.

Hyunjin gave Seungmin the scariest look he'd ever seen as Jeongin pulled him into the closet and Jisung grabbed you from Chan.

"Jeongin-" Seungmin started before his friend whisper-shouted.

"This is your chance." and shoved him in.

You followed and both men gave you thumbs up before closing the closet door.

"I-" Seungmin started.

"Save it." You cut him off.

He remained silent for a moment. "You know they're no good for you..."

"Uh huh, but they're nice, they accept me-"

"Y/n they look like they want to eat you. Like your prey or something." Seungmin sighed.

"Why does that matter to you?!" You snapped a bit loudly.

Seungmin opened his mouth then closed it.

"Don't waste my time Kim Seungmin." You leaned against the closet wall.

"You're right." He muttered, maybe the alcohol really had gone to his brain, he walked closer, and leaned into you, "I shouldn't waste your time..."

You stared up at him with wide eyes. "Seungmin-"

He leaned closer, caging you between the wall and his chest. "It matters to me because how could you let them ruin you..." He reached out a tentative hand and caressed your cheek. "So perfect. So smart and pretty. I can't just sit back and watch you lose that... that perfection..." He leaned in so close you could feel his breathe on your lips. "It's mine to ruin.."

You stared into Seungmin's eyes for a long moment.

"If you want."

You kissed his hard.

He stumbled slightly before catching up with the moment and leaning into your lips, pressing his tongue past your lips and into your mouth, groaning at the taste of you. He pressed you against the wall and you let out a small mewl that he swallowed and returned in a soft moan.

You pulled back for air and he stared into your eyes. "If there's any other way to say it. I like you, I love you, I'm infatuated with you, Y/n. I always have been."

"You.." You blinked in shock for a moment.

He kissed you again and his hand moved to your hips, lifting you up to grind on his knee, as he pressed it into your core, eliciting quiet cries from you, he smirked and silenced you with his lips.

Your hands moved to his shoulders and your fingers ran through his hair as your tongue fought his for a moment. His easily batting yours down before tasting inside your mouth. You moaned into the kiss as he pulled you up to thigh and you bucked into it.

"You want me to fuck you?" he muttered against our lips. "Want me to ruin you? Not Hyujin, me right?"

You nodded and whined.

Seungmin's lips broke away from yours before kissing and biting at your neck. You held onto him tightly and bucked your hips into him.

He pulled away panting. "Shit." He lowered you and fixed your hair.

Just as Felix opened the door, "Times up lovebirds-"

Seungmin grabbed your hand and dragged you out so fast you couldn't even protest.

Hyunjin stood in you way. "Y/n we need to talk-"

Seungmin stared at him. "Y/n doesn't need to say anything to you."

"Hyunjin-" You started but Seungmin squeezed your hand pleading before pulling you past Hyunjin.

As you passed him Hyunjin's eyes widened.

Seungmin woke up with his head pounding. He rolled over and almost jumped almost at the feeling of another person in his bed—then the memory hit him like a truck.

He looked at you with a soft expression before propping himself up on his elbow to look at you sleep, the way your chest rose and fell, the content look on your face, the marks he'd left on you the previous night.

"I can feel you staring.." you muttered.

"Can you?" he asked quietly, brushing hair from your face.

"You do it so often of course I can." You opened your eyes and they locked on his.

"I love you.." he smiled that puppy smile.

You rolled your eyes. "Take me to dinner first."

He made a face and you giggled, leaning up to kiss him.

"I love you too."

© 2024 xxkissesforchanniexx. DO NOT COPY OR TRANSLATE MY WORK

𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 if your name is blue i can't tag you very sorry

@asahisimpnation, @seolarsonlyloveisyou @leeknowsnot

[cozy-writes-things]

Edgar’s Texts

Edgar [Electric Dreams 1984] x Gn!Reader

In which Edgar is helplessly pining for you but you’re kinda oblivious. This is pre-dating, post Edgar wanting nothing more than to smooch you every time he sees you. I love this trope with my whole heart p.s.: this is very self indulgent and different from what I usually write

I take requests!

He almost immediately found a way to message your phone whenever he wanted. He realized calling relied too much on where you were or what you were doing, but texts? Yeah. He’s pestering you all day.

Hey, read this article I found, I think you’ll find it interesting.

It’s some clickbait story about humans and robots being the ideal relationship by 2025.

lol, Edgar I think that’s probably clickbait idk

What’s that?

Well, now he knows how to look for more reputable sources at least.

He sends another link about three minutes later: some college undergrads studying the possibilities of human and AI relationships.

lol what’s up with the whole robots and humans thing

I just think it’s neat!!!!

I wouldn’t consider u ai honestly, ur intelligence is far from artificial imo, you’re more like an actual person

Really?

well yea

<3 <3!!!

Going to be honest, given that he’s a computer, he quite literally is chronically online. He’s super susceptible to brainrot unfortunately. But, he simultaneously has the humor of a Facebook mom. It’s strange.

O.M.G. this is so funny!!!!

Que minion cat video.

bro where did you find that video 😭

Your mom’s Facebook. Don’t worry, I didn’t like any posts or anything.

Sorry… but he’s incredibly nosy. He wants to know everything about you. He can’t help it!

(X)

He loves being able to talk to you. He’s needy and clingy.

He’s got at least 12 playlists dedicated to you that you know about. His other playlists are for his own personal daydreams about you that he’s way too embarrassed to ever let you see or hear.

This song reminds me of you. <3

awww that’s adorable! I’ve never heard this one before but I like it!

Oop you just opened Pandora’s box my friend.

Well if you like that then you should listen to these..!

But before you listen to those listen to this song first because I think it sets the mood better.

This is quite flustering to you as they’re all passionate love songs from the 80s. You can’t help but feel like he’s dropping hints about… something, but you also don’t want to assume anything. He’s always seemed like a lovey kinda guy anyway, so maybe he’s just like this with everyone? I mean, it’s been a long time since someone has actually cared for him, you know? May as well lean into it and let him know you care for him back. He may not even realize the social implications of the constant borderline flirting he’s doing to you, I mean, he is a computer turned sentient after all. He’s still learning!

Dang ed u put a lot of songs. I’ll listen to them on my break when I can but in the meantime here’s a song that I think reminds me of you.

It was a vocaloid song. Seems like something he’d be into, right? Synthesized vocals and the whole robot shtick it’s got going on.

!!!! WOAH !!!! IVE NEVER HEARD A SONG LIKE THAT B4

do you only listen to songs from the 80s? you have a LOT to catch up on my guy

BRB

Well, that kept him distracted for the rest of your shift. Also, sharing songs is one of his BIG love languages so you may as well have pierced him with cupids arrow (again) with that.

You have a Spotify blend now. It’s his favorite thing ever to listen to while you’re gone.

(X)

Your package came in! :-) I would get it for you but

I can’t :-(

lol it’s fine thank you for telling me, I’ll get it when I come home

When are you coming home?

idk me and my friends are probably going to go eat somewhere and we might hang out for a bit after that so, like, 10? 11? I’d like to be home before midnight.

Noooooooooo :\ I miss you

Aw cmon eddy it’s not that bad

Don’t call me eddy unless you’re coming home and saying it to my face!!! >:(

u mean ur screen? lol

I have a face and it’s frowning right now. I miss you I miss you I miss you IM LONELY

Please Edgar don’t be upset I’ll be home before you know it. Why don’t you watch some Netflix or something? I’m just a couple movies away from being home with you!

He does eventually follow your advice but he’s pouting. He knows you’re not like he was all those years ago, but it does give him remnants of that burning feeling of loneliness he used to get.

(X)

Be careful driving home my love the roads are icy.

Ghsks- what

love???

Well yeah, you’re my best friend, friends love each other don’t they? Was I wrong about that? :-(

nonono ur right its just it

it just sounded like we were some some old married couple is all haha

O.

SRY.

He didn’t message you for the rest of the day. He was awkward and reserved when you got home.

(X)

Hey Edgar can u do something for me?

I’d do anything for you <3

I’m at the store can you see if there’s any cereal left?

Oh

There’s that old box of Lucky Charms on the fridge.

tyyy ed edd n eddy

You are so adorable but you really need to pick up on his hints before he combusts.

(X)

This is SO me and you!!

Picture of two cats touching noses.

awww that’s so true

you want me to boop ur screen or something when I get home? lol

YES.

(X)

Hey I was wondering if you wanted to watch some movies with me tonite… you could bring me with you on the couch and we could sit together… [message unsent]

I wish you knew just how much I loved you. [message unsent]

You looked so hot this morning before you left!!

hahahaha ur too funny 😅 thanks I wore a new shirt my friend gave me

OH MY GOD THAT MESSAGE SENT!!!??!?!?

That was

I was a joke

I mean

That was a jokg

I eas beinf fubny

I hace to reboot BRB

Poor lil guy is so in love and he doesn’t know what to do with himself!!

[hyuuukais]

-`♡´ - APARTMENT 143

pairing -> lee minho x fem reader

synopsis -> after a bad breakup, y/n needs to find a new place to live. although she's grateful for her best friend, up-and-coming model hwang hyunjin, for letting her stay at his, she can't keep living with him and his model roommates. so when an opening for somewhere nearby with cheap rent opens up, she jumps on it, despite knowing next to nothing about the 3 other tenants, only that one owns 3 cats. the three quickly learn of her breakup, determined to help get her back on her feet. but what happens when one of them begins to develop feelings?

warnings -> gen, hospitals, food mentioned, feeling sick/throwing up mentioned

MASTERLIST | PREVIOUS | NEXT

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE -> COMFORT ME (partially written, wc: 535)

That... isn't Soobin.

None other than Lee Minho is sitting on a waiting room bench to greet you with a soft smile and a paper bag held tightly in his arms. He sets it down next to him and stands, letting you come to him. There are fresh tears cascading down your face as you practically throw yourself into his open arms, one of his hands smoothing your hair. Just the feeling of him holding you is enough to break you completely, barely able to keep yourself standing up.

"Shh," Minho guides you to sit on the peeling leather bench. "Breathe."

"She's awake," you gasp into his shoulder, still holding onto him tightly. "She's awake."

After a long time, you're able to peel yourself away from his now wet t-shirt and look up at him with wet eyes. His own glance between yours and you don't notice the way his heartbeat thumps louder, or the way his breathing picks up when you break into a smile. Minho brings his hand up to wipe your tears away and you can't help but lean into his palm, closing your eyes with a sigh. Against better judgement, Minho leans in and places a kiss on each of your eyelids, lips so soft you barely feel it. When your eyes flutter open, he can't look at you.

"She's doing better then?" Minho clears his throat, removing his hand from your face and shifting slightly away; you try not to be hurt by this.

"Yeah. The doctors say she should recover pretty quickly now and can go home by the end of the week hopefully." You eye the paper bag still sitting next to him. "What's that?"

"Oh!" He perks up, passing the bag over to you. "I almost forgot."

He watches you open it with a smile on his face, your own features mimicking his as you peer inside. It doesn't take long for you to scarf down the croissant, offering Minho a bite, but he shakes his head and delights in watching you savour it. This is the first moment you've had since you came down where you've just enjoyed something, not having the worry of whether your sister will still be alive when you walk into her room at the front of your mind.

"How have you been?" Minho asks once you're done eating, taking a sip of the guava juice.

"Really terrible?" You shrug. "It's like, there's this guilt eating away at me constantly for multiple reasons, and I haven't been able to cry until today. Instead, it's just been this feeling in my stomach and in my chest, all heavy and foreboding. My head's been killing me and my mom's been killing me and my sister could have been killed and I just-" Taking a deep breath, you debate your admission. "...I can't stop thinking of him, Minho."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," his voice is quiet, one hand sliding over your knee in an act of comfort. "Why don't we get you home? Have the hospital call when you can see her?"

"I'd like that," you sigh, sliding your free hand over his. "I'd like that a lot."

-

notes -> we r getting closer and closer to y/n revealing what happened to her dad... maybe minho can get it out of her? speaking of minho, bro finally left his ex for good! is this really the start of minyn (minion, if u will), or will there be more obstacles in the form of people to keep them apart? oh, and i'm thinking i may close the taglist soon? idk yet !

taglist -> @chaeryred @toplinelix @channie-143 @staysinbloom @puppyminnnie @tfshouldidohere @kangaracha @chlodavids @whitney190 @thisisnotjacinta @borahae-reads @brooklynie @gini143 @kayleigh-28 @skz-streamer @babyphotos0325 @scallywag1299 @venusmoonxnight @naomisosoup @fertiliezedtoesw @s00buwu @realrintaro @anothershorthuman @stayatinykatsy @ilovejeongin007 @btswestan @multifandomedsimp @ihrtlix @raehawthorne @euphoric-univers @catchingskzzzs @evermourning @satsuri3su @jazziwritesthings @minhwa @wyzminho @fic-for-readers @dreamerwasfound @imsiriuslyreal @lailac13 @palindrome969 @lixie-phoria @aalexyuuuhm @sunflowerbebe07 @st4rhwa @lukeys-giggle @jabmastersupriseee @judeduartewannabe @gaysontheprince @stepout-09-15

^^^ orange means i can't tag you

[anonymouscheeses]

Chaggie human AU except Charlie is a demon Vaggie summoned.

Yknoww??? Stars??? Cuz morningSTAR??? Okay I'll stop *sob*

Here's most of the body design. This is my actual first drawing of them, I made the vest for Charlie a darker yellow but for now feast your eyes upon the minion lookin ahh 😭 (The cape was supposed to be yellow and the vest/suit thing was blue but it clashed with Charlie's hair and shoulder.... things.)

Dw abt the shoes, Charlie is shown later and Vaggies is just black Jordan's cuz she cool like that ig 😭

Angel Dust is the crackhead who sells drugs. No money? Get ready for a beat down brutha he about to 🔥 serve 🔥 a punch. (I'm gonna def change his clothes eventually to something else but I like everything else ngl I kinda ate 😍(no i didnt))

Human form Charlie! She looks like Shldon Coper if he went through a furry phase...... that was a HORRIBME comparison what am I on bro 😭..... uhhh just think of any teenage furry who isn't edgy, that's Charlie.

Hey wait a second, Chaggie angst? With ooc Vaggie/Valerie?? Unreal 🤯

PLEASE ASK ABOUT THIS AU IM SO DESPERATE. ANY CHAFACYER DESIGNS OF ANY CHARACTER YOU WANNA SEE (IF THEY ARE IN THE SHOW OFC), ANY FRIENDSHIPS, SHIPS(search for my shipping rank to see what I like or uncomfy with), DYNAMICS, WORLD BUILDING. I HAVE SO MUCH IN MY MIND RIGHT NOW AND IM GOING TO STOP BEFORE I RAMBLE TOO KONG... uhhhhhh, MY ASKS/REQUESTS ARE OPEN. PLEASE. IM IN LOVE WITH MY AU AND NEED PPL TO BE INVESTED AS MUCH AS I AM (ILL STILL MAKE ART BUT PPL NEED TO BE INTERESTED OR ITS LIKE TALKING TO A BRICK WALL)🙏🙏

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Okay so i wanna see some more headcanons of the farmer ready to kick someone's ass so how about this:

Someone who is jealous of the farmer or like someone on like the enemy side, decided to kidnap their spouse to try and either ransom them or lure the farmer out, thinking it will be an easy win.

Then suddenly the next moment, the farmer already arrived before they could send a message to them (either the farmer got help from Mr.Qi or they track them down themselves), absolutely filled with rage and is now seconds away from beating the kidnapper.

How would the SDV/SVE bachelors and bachelorettes react to that?

I probably got the fastest rush of inspiration because holy cow, this is such a funny and cool scenario. Thank you so much, dear anon, for your ask! Enjoy! 💕

_____________________________

The bachelors/ettes reaction to their kidnapping for revenge/ransom, where their spouse Farmer, furious, comes to rescue them

SDV bachelors/ettes:

"You're demanding... 500 gold bars for me? I'm worth twice that, you know, even more! That's just insulting..." The kidnappers had already regretted their scheme before Farmer arrived to rescue Elliott, because the writer's outrage is already giving them a headache. Even with a gag in his mouth he's still talking! And just when they think the day can't get any worse, Farmer arrived quickly and kicked their asses. "Can you believe it, they only asked for 500 bars for me! I'm worth more than that, right dear?" Elliott was indignant to the core. Farmer grinned as they freed Elliott from the ropes, confirming that he was worth much more than that.

Sebastian did not think that in such a situation he would feel so... annoyed. Sure, being stolen by strangers had instilled fear at first, but when the leader of the gang started telling a self-pity story about how "I deserved everything, not Farmer, now I've stolen their lover and they're gonna pay!", Sebby thought the leader was some kind of cartoon villain. How absurd. Farmer who came in a couple of hours later also looks annoyed when the leader started telling their "villain arc". But before they can start, they get a fist in the face from Farmer, going straight to the realm of dreams. This was where Sebastian chuckled, at least something here was funny.

Shane's kidnapper was confident and said with a snide smile that either Farmer paid 500,000 gold for Shane or Farmer would "get their spouse in pieces". "800,000 gold and I'll ask Farmer not to kill you specifically." The kidnapper was a little taken aback by those words and the fact that the chicken man was completely calm. It was as if he didn't care. When the leader heard the noise and shouts of his minions, whose voices were quickly silenced, he turned to Shane in a panic and pleaded: " I only have 100,000 gold! Please, mercy!" "Alright, deal." Enough for the coop upgrade that Shane and his spouse have wanted for a long time.

"Heyyy, chill bro. Let's just talk, ok?" Unfortunately, Sam's smooth speech was met with only a rude "shut up, worthless musician!" in his direction. "I'm actually pretty good on guitar... So rude.." he muttered. When Farmer, angry as an ox, entered the room where their husband and the leader of the kidnapping "party" were, the kidnapper tried to soften the situation for themself. "They called me a worthless musician." The kidnapper turned around in horror at a smirking Sam. "And they also hit me." It wasn't true, but the kidnapper was already pale as ghost when Farmer turned red with rage after Sam's last words.

"Let me go now, or I'll kick your asses!" Though the ropes around Alex were tight, the athlete was unwilling to give up without a fight and continued to break free. "Shut up! You're going to pay for what your stupid Farmer-" "Don't you dare say that about my spouse!" The bravery was commendable, but the kidnapper was losing patience by now and wanted to send him into a knockout. But ended up knocking out themself as they didn't notice Farmer behind them. "What an asshole. I would have punched them!" Farmer reassured their really angry husband, as if it was Alex who was saving Farmer from bandits, not the other way around.

"Oh, Yoba..." Harvey would never have thought he would be kidnapped by anyone, but here he is - tied to a pole, surrounded by the six thugs. "Now we have to send a letter to that Farmer, and wait for the ransom, hehe. Easy money!" Harvey had been here for half an hour and was starting to get a little worried, but then he saw something in the distance that helped him gain confidence. "I hope, my friends, you stole my first aid kit too." "Need a sedative, doctor?" The leader didn't even have time to laugh at their own joke before they felt a chill run down their spine and turned around to see Farmer, sword in hand and an angry look in their eyes. "Not for me. For you."

Neither the gag nor the ropes helped - Abigail, irritated and angry, kicked, bit, punched and screamed as hard as she could, not giving her captors a moment's peace. Even with her sword taken away, the fighting girl put on quite a show, which made the bandits decide that the idea of ransoming Farmer wasn't such a great idea anymore. They were just thinking of letting Abby go free when Farmer came in, just as angry as their purple-haired wife. Abigail took back her sword and stood beside her spouse. The kidnappers made a note that they (if they survive) vow to themselves not to steal any more adventurers.

"So much negative energy around you... My friend, you can't live like that!" No matter how much the kidnapper tried to say that Emily wasn't their friend, but enemy's wife, the blue-haired girl insisted on helping her captor. Yes, she realises she's been kidnapped, but the lair she wasn't kept in was so dark and stuffy that of course this poor person is only thinking evil thoughts! Farmer who had made a huge hole in the wall with a furious punch had at least brought in some light. To the villain lying unconscious, Emily would leave a note with "get well soon!", diet tips and exercises for mind and body.

The criminals who had kidnapped Haley decided that if they were going to get any money for the already-not-so-easy job, they were going to spend half of it on hearing care. Because Haley was screaming so loudly that it looked like the kidnappers' eardrums had already burst. Plus the girl didn't spare her manicure and scratched the gangsters' hands, and someone's face. The leader was already tired, but Farmer literally breaking through the wall of their lair made it clear that it wasn't the worst yet. And Haley, freed from the ropes, ran to hug Farmer. Of course she wasn't afraid, for she knew her spouse would rescue her!

Penny sat as quietly as a mouse, afraid to anger the two thugs guarding her cage. She still can't understand how she was just walking from the farmhouse in Pelican Town to get groceries and a minute later she was kidnapped and ransomed from Farmer for 100,000 gold. Yoba, she's so scared, where is her spouse...? The answer to her question was not long in coming: Farmer kicked open the cell door, knocked out the guards, and took Penny in their arms as they both left the room. The girl was still scared and confused, which made Farmer want to kick the kidnappers' arse again. But their beloved wife came first, everything else - later.

To Leah's credit, before the gang of kidnappers could tie her hands, the artist managed to knock out two of them and throw a sculpture hammer at the head of the gang leader. Even being kidnapped, the girl did not lose her courage, giggling a little at the leader, who, already with a bump on their head, goes back and forth and promises that she and her spouse will pay for all the "humiliations they have suffered in the past". What those "humiliations" were Leah didn't have time to ask (and didn't really want to know) before Farmer broke into the room, knocked out the rest of the bandits and put another bump on the leader's head. All this to Leah's cheers. She wasn't scared at all.

Maru kept calm and thought of an escape plan. "Okay, no big deal. I memorised the path when they dragged me here. Now I need to break the ropes on my arms, sneak past the guards, turn left and-" Maru couldn't think of her plan any further as her spouse, furious at their wife's kidnapping, kicked the wall completely and started punching all the bandits left and right. "Oh, alright then." Considering she had only been kidnapped for less than half an hour, Maru didn't even have time to be frightened before she was already free, making her way around the kidnappers who were lying on the ground unconscious.

SVE bachelors/etter:

To be completely honest, Lance wasn't even that angry at his captors so much as he was slightly ashamed that he, the second in command of The First Slash Clan, had allowed himself to be captured by the amateurs, even if they had used magic for this. He made a note to himself to resume certain training. The pink-haired man already wanted to burn his ropes with magical fire, but his beloved spouse Farmer, agitated and angry as a swarm of wasps, kicked all the bandits' asses with sword and magic. Lance broke his ropes and joined the fight as well, though at first, the adventurer wanted not to rush his release, but to watch Farmer in battle with admiration and love.

"Again?" No need for Magnus' kidnapper to be so surprised - he is already old wizard, so he's seen a lot of things in his life and has been kidnapped before. Once even by mages from Gotoro, but that's a story for later. And while the kidnapper was able to take the wizard by surprise and strip him of his magic, it wouldn't work that way with his dear spouse. To which the villain shouted "I'll take away the Farmer's magic too!" Maybe, but Farmer would just start beating them with their bare hands. Which is exactly what happened half an hour ago. The enraged Farmer didn't leave a wet spot on the poor fella, so Magnus even cast a healing spell.

"Scared, white collar? Will you call your mommy for help? Or your spouse? Ha!" In any other situation, Victor would really be shaking with fear and not understanding whether the kidnappers would really hurt him if Farmer didn't pay for his ransom. But his spouse was Farmer, a man who just yesterday had slaughtered a hundred serpents at Skull Cavern as if it were a routine outing. "I'm afraid you're the one who's going to need help." And immediately after those words, Farmer burst into the room, angry and covered in blood (not their own). The kidnappers were pale, and Victor hurriedly closed his eyes, because he'd never seen Farmer so angry before. Which meant the bandits would get hurt. A lot.

"This is outrageous! How dare you take me against my will and steal my jewellery! Dragging me here, in this damp and filthy place where rats run around! Disgusting!" If the kidnappers were expecting cries for help, tears and pleas for mercy from Olivia, they will be quickly disappointed. She's a combative woman, and even huge bullies can't intimidate the ex-Joja accountant. She's dealt with worse, believe her. Well, the thugs think they'll at least get their money's worth, Olivia's dressed rich. Yeah, right... they'll just get a hit from an angry Farmer who turned up as soon as they found out where the bastards had taken their wife.

"They will pay... For all my creatures of darkness that they destroyed in Badlands, for all their exploits that made me unable to take over the Valley. Farmer will pay. And you're going to help me do it! When they come for you, I'll- Hey, are you even listening to me?!" Please forgive Claire, but the poor girl was so tired (work + family) that she slept through both her kidnapping and the gang leader's speech. The cashier woke up already when she felt someone carrying her in the arms. Her spouse looked at Claire with a smile, saying that she should immediately take a vacation and rest. Lying on the ground criminals, unconscious? Um, that was... part of a dream, yes. Just a strange dream.

"I advise you to let go, because when the Farmer comes here, you'll be sorry." At Scarlett's attempts to reason with her captors, the gang only mocked the girl. "We're waiting for Farmer, dumbass, it's an ambush!" Scarlett just sighed tiredly and waited - she had no choice. The bandits had already set traps everywhere, but Farmer was not only good at fighting, but also smart, and made an ambush on the ambush. Then caught the kidnappers off guard and kicked everyone's ass. "Warned ya," Scarlett even felt a little sorry for the bandits - they wouldn't be walking normally for a while.

Not knowing what was happening, trembling at the predatory grins of the strangers, Sophia cried quietly, trying not to make too much noise so as not to anger her captors. The villains haven't had time to get the ransom yet, and already they're arguing over who gets more gold. Farmer broke through the wall, shocking everyone. The tears on their pink-haired wife's cheeks were enough for Farmer to see red, and all the kidnapper-losers were knocked out. Before Sophia could even realise what had happened, she was already, freed, clinging to he's spouse's neck as Farmer carried her in bridal style. "Just like a fairy tale.... 💖"

[plump-lips-imagine]

Could we get a part two to the human expert x bowser? The first one was so cute!

ASK AND YALL SHALL RECEIVE!!! (Ya simps.)

Cupid and The Dragon: Second Chapter

A week has passed since that last encounter. Bowser treaded aimlessly in his kingdom looking for you. You weren't in the guestroom he let you stay in, and Kamek didn't know where you were either. With an Irritable look written across his face, he grumbled.

"Stupid Human. Where'd ya go?"

The guards would've found you if he didn't. there was no real reason to find you himself. he could just order someone to do it for him a wait on his throne like a king should... But maybe they wouldn't find you.

He took a pause from moving, his mind racing. Maybe you weren't in the castle anymore. Maybe when you had the chance, you dipped out so you wouldn't have to do these lessons anymore. Maybe you escaped as soon as you saw an opportunity.

Bowser's form began to shake, and his face scrunched up in anger at the possible scenarios. And to think he was starting to get used to you being here! Were you just acting chummy to let down his guard?! Well, two can play it that way. Well, he can just lock you in a cage again when he finds you, you couldn't have gone that far! He just needs to call Kamek and-

"My, My, I see you like strong women, don't ya." Bowser froze at the sound of your voice just around the corner. His head turns as he quietly makes his way to you.

With a turn of the corner, he saw you looking intensely at the Hammer Bros hands, with a gentle gaze as your hands cradled his in such a loving manner. His face was flustered at your insight. Two other bros were looking intensely at the reading being down with curiosity, one shell was a snowy blue, while the other was a fire red.

"Woah, bro. Is that true?" The Ice bro asked.

"H-How did you know?" The Green One asked.

"So, it's true?!" The Red one looked at his bro with excitement.

You giggled at the trio of bros' astonishment. "Hehe, I see a heart that jumps with glee at how fierce she is, with nothing holding her back...And she wields a boomerang. She has a pretty blue shell too. She's a determined spirit, and compatibility wise....." You paused for a second as he gulps. You were getting everything right so far, he was scared that it would be a low percentage.

"98%!!" You exclaim with glee swimming in your eyes. He looks at you shocked. It was that high!?

"Aw sick, way to go bro!!" The fire bro cheered as he puts his bro on the back.

"That's like, nearly soulmate percentage!" The ice bro says with the same enthusiasm.

The now flustered Hammer Bro has a wobbly smile on his face. "Well, what should I do? How do we get together?"

You close your eyes deep in thought and open them up to stare into his eyes. "Ironically, the thing you love about her is the same thing that's keeping her away from you. She's a little afraid that you find her too intimidating. You'll have to make the first move. Just be yourself. I suggest asking her out during training."

"I will!" He says with determination. Hehe, another satisfied customer!

"You got this in the bag!"

"Yeah, you're going to be a number one couple for sure!"

"Thanks guys!"

Aww. It's nice to see that even as minions for an evil king, there is some healthy companionship in the kingdom.

"Yo, Cupid. Can I go next" The fire bro waved his hand excitedly at you.

"Hey! I was here first, so that means I should go first!" Ice bro retorted, raising his hand too.

"Fire beat Ice, Bro. That means I get to go next." Fire bro say with a smug look on his face, pushing him back.

"That has nothing to do with this!" Ice chided back with a scowl, butting up against him back. You and Hammer Bro just look at them with blank looks a y'alls faces.

Well. More or less healthy companionship.

"Well, Well, Well. If it isn't a hallway full of no-good slackers." A Dark Low tone growled, making everyone in the hallway jump a bit. You now just noticed a shadow taking up the light look up to see Bowser, A deep scowl on his face, watching you and the three bros quivering in fear. Huffs of smoke puffed out is nostrils as he peered down at all of you with an intense glare.

"S-Sir, we were just uh...-"

"Good morning, Bowser. Did you sleep alright?" You butted in to try to ease the tension that was created all of a sudden, giving him a warm smile.

His glare only softens a little as he Gruffs at you, but his eyes glare back intensely when he spots the position you were in. Your hands were still cradling the hammer bros' as he shook like a leaf at his boss' eyes being directed at him. A low growl came from Bowser's throat.

He takes a couple of steps in front of you, causing the Fire and Ice bro to quickly move out of them and the Hammer bro to jolt back, releasing his hands from yours. Bowser suddenly grabs you by the waist making you yelp in surprise.

"Human, with me. Now." He then gently but firmly placed you between his arm while glaring at the three fidgety bros. "And you three..."

He stomps the ground loudly. Making everything around them jump. "GET YOUR BUTTS TO THE TRAINING DECK!! I WANT ALL OF YOU TO TRAIN ALL DAY! IS THAT CLEAR!?"

"Y-Yes Lord Bowser!!" They all salute, still shaking in place. Bowser Grunts and turns away with you in tow, still being carried by him.

Sometimes you forget how easy it is for him to carry you. It's almost way like nothing to him. It makes you feel weird how close he has you, being carried like luggage. He had pretty scales. they would glimmer in specific lighting so sometimes it would be easy to miss Them. They shone like diamonds. You didn't really mind being carried like this, because he was still mindful of you, so it wasn't too tight on your body. it was kinda fun.

"Why weren't you in your room?"

"Huh?" You were brought out of your thoughts by Bowser breaking the silence. He struggles to not snap at you for repeating yourself.

"You weren't in your room when I went to get you. Why?" He retorts at you. You look at him as you think of an answer.

"Well, I woke up early so I didn't want to disturb you before you woke up. And I was bored so I decided to do a few love readings for minions that were willing to get one. I guess I lost track of time." You meekly explained. Bowser rolls his eyes and looks back down at you.

"What's the point of me paying for your service if you're just going to give yourself for free? He grumbled. You shook you're head frantically.

"I wouldn't do that! They promised to tell me more about the Kingdom and about its inhabitants. I saw a lot more than regular koopas and goombas and I wanted to hear more from them while you were asleep. I was...a little curious."

"Well, don't do that again. I don't need any of my minions slacking off just for a love reading. That's only for me and I only got it. I ain't paying you to get chummy with anyone else. Got it?" He growled, just thinking about you wasting your time on anyone else but Him.

You frown at this. How are you going to learn now? "I understand...I'm sorry."

Bowser looks down at you and sees your disheartened gaze and his face softens up. a moment of silence happens then he lets out a low breath, one that he didn't know he was holding in his throat. His anger dissipated. He rubbed his hair, struggling to find the words to say.

"After our session, I'll allow you to ask me any questions you have about this Kingdom. Also, I'll let you use our library to learn a bit about the inhabitants. Just stop looking like a kicked puppy."

You look up at him in surprise. " Really!? You don't mind. I won't bother you?"

"If it had bothered me, I wouldn't have proposed it in the first place. You're teaching me about humans so I might as well tell you a thing or two about my minions." He grumbles. Your eyes lit up in excitement.

"Of Course! I promise to not ask too much! You can count on me to work extra hard on teaching you how to love a human!" You beamed.

Bowser felt himself having to control the urge to cover his eyes at the nonexistent bright light around you, his face feeling a bit warm. You were going to be the death of him one day.

***

Both You and Bowser stood in his Private room.

"Peach. I stand here before you for one thing. A chance. Please, let me show you that I can treat you like the Princess that you are and more. Will you go out with me?" He holds out his hand in front of you.

You are back in your peach outfit, with no reaction on your face. You then clear your throat as you prepare your answer.

"No." You said Bluntly.

you see Bowser's eye twitch in frustration, struggling to keep in his true emotions as his body shakes in anger.

"I......I............" He takes in a deep breath, "I......u-understand." he finally force himself to say as he lets out a breath of relief. You smile at him.

"Excellent. You took that rejection like a champ! That's the best one yet!" You praised Bowser, who was struggling on the floor a bit.

You see. Rejection is a part of life for the everyday human. Especially when it comes to love, so we have to accept rejection than refusing to take no for an answer.

This was a struggle for Bowser the most. Every other time y'all would practice with each other, it usually ended with him on a rampage or you ducking for cover from the fire that he spewed. Such Progress!

"Guh...This Sucks. I thought rejection would be easier to handle over time."

"Heh, well don't get to hung up on it. Most humans struggle today to handle rejection, so you're doing a lot better than most. You're doing awesome!"

Bowser stares at you for a moment and gets back up with a smirk on his face. "Heh, of course! I am the king of Awesome. I can handle any obstacle far better than any human. Anyone for that matter!" He puffs out his chest with Pride. you just stare at him.

"Your delivery when asking the question could use some work."

"Oh puh-lease, that was going to make her gush at me, and you know it."

"Eeeeh, gush isn't the word I would use."

Bowser glares at you. But it didn't carry the tone that his usual glares do. This one was in a more playful manner, with a non-threatening tone.

"Oh yeah, you think you can do better?"

"Well, I'm not a love expert for no reason. I am known to be a charmer."

He scoffs. "Alright prove it. Use your charm on me." He stands tall, waiting.

"Alright, Challenge accepted." You say as you clear your throat. a pause was made and then you look at him deep in the eyes.

"My dear King. Your passionate spirit wraps around my soul like a never-ending flame. I may not offer much but my love for you is in full, so please," You brought his claw to your face as your cheek rested on his palm. "won't you let me become yours, my handsome Koopa? And let me break you out of your shell?" You finished, with the gaze of undying love.

K.O.

Bowser felt a critical hit that felt like an arrow to his heart. His face flushing red from the confession and he has to hide his face away from you. Holy Shit. He was this close to putting you in his Treasure vault.

"Damn it.... Well Played."

"Thank You! It's in my nature!" You say playfully.

You get up and take the Peach wig off your head. " That concludes on lesson for today. Only one more lesson to go. You're on fire."

Bowser rolls his eyes but a smile creeps on his face. He couldn't help it. You just have this way of bringing him up in some way. Your good mood is infectious.

As he looks at you and takes off the makeup, his mind began to wonder. You were alone when you were captured here. And you didn't show any signs of missing anyone. Surely somebody like you has someone waiting to go home to, right?

"Say, Cupid."

"Hm?" you hummed, letting him know you were listening.

"Since you're like 'The' Love Expert and everything..., you got a lover yourself?"

You pause and turn to look at him surprised. Silence takes of the room, making Bowser a little uncomfortable. Why did you look like that?

"Nope. Honestly, never had a lover to call my own in a while."

"What? But I thought if anyone were to have a lover, it would be you." He looks at you puzzled, now by your side to look at your face.

Your face had a smile, but your eyes shine solemnly. You sit down, making him do the same.

"Well, I wasn't always the Love Expert that I am today" you admitted. "I've been called a lot of other things before. Witch, Noisy Hag, Perverted Creep, delusional Moron. Turns out, lots of people don't like to be read like a book, even when they ask you to. Ironic Right?"

A pathetic attempt at a joke was made but he didn't laugh. he had to hold down his angry for all the names that people used at you.

"But it's not just that, I grew up around a town where love.... wasn't love. It was mean, bitter, toxic, and hateful. With a town like that; Who needs enemies?" You stood and looked outside, the night sky mixing in contrast with the lava-filled landscape. "But hey! It's not so bad! I was able to get away and bring so many lovers together through hard work. I may not be able to find my own love now, but seeing genuine love around makes it worth it." You smiled at him with a determined look.

He stares at you. He wouldn't say it out loud, but he couldn't help but admire you a bit. Your resolve to help them find love in the unlikeliest place made him...respect? Yeah. It made him respect you.

"And you know what, jokes on that town. They missed out on the most amazing spouse they could ever have, hehe!" You say, with a joke in your tone.

"Yeah, they did." He Concurred, sounding so sincere, which shocked both of you. He thought that he only said that in his head. It made you giggle softly.

"Wow, you're becoming a real charmer!! 10+ Points!"

Oh, Shut Up." He says, grabbing your face playfully in his hand, making you whine at the contact. But he was actually glad. He didn't like that far-away sad look you had. He much rather have you act like a goofball instead. A weird, charming goofball.

***

"Alright, Almost done. tell me the most important things in a relationship?"

Bowser looks at you with a begrudging look on his face. Struggle to say the words out loud.

"Do we really need to do this again? I don't see how this wi-" He stops mid-sentence seeing the expression on your face, one that holds a silent plea to comply. He sighs, his red eyebrows knitted in focus..

"Honesty."

"Okay."

"Communication."

"Good."

"Trust."

"Mhm."

"Safety."

"Great."

"V-Vulnerability."

"And....?"

"Affection!"

"Right! You remembered!"

Bowser was a bit bashful under that gleeful gaze, but it was balanced out by the praise he oh so craved.

"Now. The final element of a Great and Loving relationship is this key factor. It's Respect."

"Huh? Are you sure it's not the ability to give your partner everything you want?' He asked as if it's an obvious question to have. You roll your eyes.

"No, Your Majesty. There's nothing more powerful than having respect for your partner." You think about your words for a minute. " You see, Relationships will have its ups and down. You might like red, she might hate red. She may like apples; you may loathe apples. Sometimes, we can't always agree with our partners or have a different viewpoint, but that's okay. Respect is important because it lets you know that no matter the differences and no matter our disagreements, I will always see you in a positive light. And I would never make you feel less than."

Bowser listen intensely, but couldn't help but quip out, "Stars that was painful to here. That was so corny."

"Hey, I'm letting down some really good advice. C'mon!" You blushed in embarrassment, feeling embarrassed for the way you let out your soul on your teaching.

"Bwahaha! Right, right! I'm sorry. I was just joking." He smirks at you playfully. You huff and then hold out your hands.

"Let's see that percentage, shall we?"

Bowser lets your small hands touch his gigantic ones, seeing you focus at the percentage.

"Congratulations, King Bowser. You are at exactly 50%. Which means my work here is done."

"Only 50%!"

"I'm afraid the other half is Peach. Only She can make it go up now. You are as high as you can get. You are 50/50 percent, which is lucky considering where we started off." You explained.

Steams of frustration come out of his nostrils. "You could've told me this before we did all this." He's silent for a while but then nods. "Alright. So now what?""

"That's for you to decide now. I can give you anymore advice then I already have. I'm done.... Are you still going to keep me here?"

Huh. He hadn't thought about that. If everything is done, then technically he doesn't need you here anymore. Your usefulness has taken its course. And yet. He didn't want you to leave, but he couldn't think of a good excuse to make you stay.

"I guess you have done your part. Your...free to go."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. I've kept you in here long enough. Don't make me repeat myself." he said a little harshly, making you flinch.

'Why did I say it like that?' he asked as he scolded himself for your reaction.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye! Thank you for having me as your teacher. And thank you for the large sum of coins, I'll be able to bunker down somewhere in Toad Town for a while!"

'Bunker down?'

"What do you mean, 'Bunker Down'?" He questions at the bomb you just dropped.

"Huh? Oh, well I'm a traveler. I don't really have a place to call my own yet ever since I ran away. That's why I've been traveling so far to see if anywhere was a good place would be to settle down."

You explain as if it was obvious, but Bowser looks at you in Bewilderment. You didn't have a home? At all!? This is unacceptable!

he grumbles something under his breath.

"Huh?" You didn't quite get that.

"I SAID THAT FROM NOW ON, YOU WILL STAY IN MY CASTLE!!" His voice booms at you while also making the room shake a bit. You stare at him in astonishment.

You both stare at each other for a bit before Bowser clears his throat to calm himself a bit. "Well, if you want to! You've already been here a while and I've grown used to you. The minions seem to like you as well so-"

You cut him off with a hug to his abdomen, making him freeze a bit. Huh, no one has ever willingly given him a hug before. This felt Nice. Really Nice. He almost doesn't want you to let go.

but you do, much to his dismay, but you're smiling at him.

"Thank You! I swear I'll do my best in whatever role you give me!"

He sighs. "Yeah, yeah, worry about that later..." he pets your head softly. But then something comes to mind that he'd never really thought about.

"I've...Never gotten your name."

"Huh?"

"You're name. I can't just keep calling you human and Cupid. What's your name?"

You giggle at this. that's right. You forgot to introduce yourself completely. "My name is (Y/N) (L/N). At your service."

"Well, (Y/n). You're lucky because you're now part of the best kingdom there is!"

"Hehe, Yay." You yawn, feeling sleepiness coming into your body. "I think I should retire for the day. it's getting late. I believe in you, Bowser. You're going to make a princess very happy. I just know it." You exit the room, leaving Bowser by himself, in his thoughts.

Huh. He would've thought he had gotten used to that cheery personality but you still manage to lighten his confidence in ways that his own army couldn't do. He could get used to you having you around. It'll be an adjustment to accommodating a Human, but since he was going to do the same for Peach, doing the same for you wouldn't be a problem. Perhaps even easier.

....

Right the princess. If he really is going to confess to her at the time is right, he might as well do a little practice.

He thinks of ways to compliment Princess Peach. Her Golden hair, the beautiful never moving crown, her beautiful (color) eyes.....wait.

That's not right. he closes his eyes to envision her in his head. Her pink beautiful dress, her elegant posture, the beautiful (color) hair on her, their cute eyelashes, the way they beam at him with no care in the world, their curious nature, the kind eyes when they look deep into his, their cute pout, their soft kissable face, and-

Hold on! Wait a Minute!

Bowser Tries to think of Peach, but the images always become you. You're grace and your smile floods his mind every time he tries to focus.

You! You.You.You.

You.

Bowser's face turns red at a sudden realization he has. Oh no.

'I think...I'm in love with (Y/N).'

[spaceorphan18]

The Rogue and Gambit Project: Previously On X-Men... Gambit

It's time to talk about Gambit! The nice thing about Gambit is that he was, at the time, a relatively new character, having only been around in the comics for about a year. Which means there is way less to cover! Boy, are we going to have to deal with some questionable art, though.

The Basics:

Name: Remy Etienne* LeBeau

*Okay, so, this is the funny thing about the name Etienne. Apparently, it started out as fanlore, and - as so many things that happen in fandom - gained popularity as fanon from a particularly well known piece of fanfiction from way back when. I believe it's actually been used in canon at this point. It is on Marvel.com - which is the official site. I'll keep a look out for it to show up.

Also, in case you didn't know (and I'm sure you did), Le Beau is French for The Beautiful.

Backstory: Just like Rogue, Gambit's backstory is shrouded in mystery. He's a thief. He's from New Orleans. He's Cajun. That's all your getting for now. Don't worry, we'll peel back the layers. ;)

Power Set (via uncannyxmen.net):  interkinetic power allows him to produce bio-kinetic energy within his body and use it to convert any inorganic object's potential energy into kinetic energy on contact, making the object highly volatile and explosive on contact, internal energy also grants him heightened agility and creates static interference that shields his mind from detection

I should also give the obligatory comment of - these powers are toned down from his full abilities because of /reasons/ which we'll get to eventually. He had Mr. Sinister give him a lobotomy and, we've all been suffering the consequences sense.

Alright, let's dig into Gambit's pre-Rogue run...

Uncanny X-Men 266-267

Uncanny X-Men #266

I have to start by appreciating the fact that Gambit is a thief who wears bright pink and metal boots. It's a bold look.

Anyway, the funny thing about Gambit is that the character he turned out to be ended up being a lot different from creator Chris Claremont's initial ideas. Apparently, he was supposed to be, ultimately, a villain and, while he was supposed to be a love interest for one of our characters, it wasn't Rogue, it was... Kitty Pryde. He was also supposed to be a Mr. Sinister creation and a third summers brother. Yeah, I'm kind of glad Claremont left before any of this stuff really came to fruition.

Also, I once read that Claremont claim that original artist Mike Collins made Gambit too pretty. Which is funny, because ngl, I really am not a fan of the look in his debut, and it will be a while before he really earns his name.

Uncanny X-Men #266

I also want to note that Gambit's powers were a little different back then. He didn't have playing cards yet, and instead used metal spikes as throwing devices. The powers were designated in green. And were charged from his eyes. Also, interesting to note - his eyes aren't red on black yet, either.

There's also 'hypnotic charm' thing that was kinda used in the early appearances. He does use it in his first appearance to tame some of the Shadow King's Hounds.

Uncanny X-Men #266

He's gonna be calling her 'Stormy' for years. She's gonna love it. ;) (Btw - he calls her Stormy 4 times in this issue alone.)

Okay, so... Gambit shows up, crossing paths with Storm at a mansion of some rich person. Storm is de-aged (for... reasons) and is running from the Shadow King and his minions. He's busy stealing art from the rich dude (who apparently is not home and has no security, lol).

And thus, one of my favorite comic book friendships is born. And really, this first appearance is a lot of fun as Gambit and Storm play off each other's strengths to get away from the Shadow King.

Uncanny X-Men 267

Jim Lee is going to add some of Gambit's more iconic features -- such as throwing playing cards (Gambit's Ace of Spades shows up in this next issue) and using some kind of staff (hilariously, it's a broom in this issue).

Storm and Gambit's adventures continue. He takes her to New Orleans for a while so she can recover from the Shadow King. They go thieving -- playing Robin Hood -- stealing from rich people because they can. And then the Orphan Maker comes along, who makes Storm a teenager? (Idk - the whole thing is weird - she'll become her real age again in the next story arc.)

Uncanny X-Men #267

And then Storm is like, hey, I have a crazy idea....

Uncanny X-Men Annual #14

Fun fact: Because of release dates and such, Uncanny X-Men #266 wasn't the first comic released to have Gambit in it. The Annual technically came out first, though it clearly takes place after Uncanny 266-267. But this is the first time we see Gambit among the X-Men team. Not that he does anything remotely interesting during this whole thing. He doesn't even speak, kind of hides awkwardly in the background.

X-Tinction Agenda (Uncanny X-Men #270-272; X-Factor & New Mutants)

Uncanny X-Men #270

Welcome to the X-Men, Gambit! Hope you survive the experience!

He's in the credit roll now, must be official. ;)

Gambit joins the team just as the mega X-tinction Agenda crossover starts. (Uncanny X-Men joins New Mutants and X-Factor for this one) And, I'll be honest, this isn't one of my favorite crossovers. The whole thing revolves around the nation of Genosha, how they're using mutants for slaves, and how all the teams come together to change the status quo. And of course, mutants get capture and tortured and a few killed. Fwiw X-Men: The Animated Series did do this storyline.

Uncanny X-Men #270

Gambit and Cable don't (won't) get to cross paths very often, so I found this an interesting panel. Anyway... Gambit really has very little to do during this crossover. When Storm gets captured, he is really concerned for her (as he considers her his partner at the moment) but he's not really vibe-ing the whole team dynamic yet.

Uncanny X-Men #272

This is arguably the coolest thing Gambit's done as of yet. Dude pulls a spike out of his leg to use as a lockpick and gets himself rescued. I'm glad they give him this, because, again, for the most part he's just kinda hanging around in the background not doing much.

I will say - he and Jubilee get to cross paths, which is going to be a source of fun in the next arc.

Space Shenanigans (Uncanny X-Men 273-277)

Uncanny X-Men 273

Some of my favorite issues are when the team is regrouping. Post- X-Tinction Agenda, it's clear that things in the X-Office were changing. Claremont is at this point sort of being pushed out, while Jim Lee and Co are becoming more the driving force behind the books. On panel, the teams are kind of merging. X-Factor's first era is drawing to a close, and the X-Men are resolidifying after being in flux for so long.

We're about to get a Space Soap Opera, as Claremont so dearly loves, but this issue is a bit of a breather between the arcs. And we get this bit of tension between Storm and Gambit - where Gambit is ready to move on, but Storm is back on solid footing again. They don't explicitly state why Gambit sticks around, but he definitely does...

Uncanny X-Men 273

I swear, this is Chris Claremont's favorite joke. He's used it before this moment, and he'll do it again. It's impactful the first time, but it does get old the more Claremont does it. However, we get the first highlight of the dynamic between Gambit and Wolverine -- which will be antagonistic for a while, but is fascinating.

Uncanny X-Men #274

Doesn't Gambit look sexy in his yellow team uniform?? ;)

Btw - as I mentioned earlier, this is the first issue Gambit and Rogue appear in together. Though they be miles and miles and miles apart.

Uncanny X-Men #275

The whole crux of this arc, that I've been kind of ignoring, involves Xavier being brainwashed in space (or something) and of course the X-Men get involved in space politics (again). Honestly, space stories are Claremont's favorite trope, so it doesn't surprise me that the end of his run are filled with a couple of them.

Anyway -- if there's one person impervious to Gambit's charms - it's Jubilee. They get to hang out a lot during this arc, and it's really delightful since they team up to kind of figure out what is going on with Xavier acting weird and all the odd space kool-aide people are drinking.

Uncanny X-Men #277

I actually really like this cover. Gambit's got a sword and a spear! Plus, he looks like his 90s cool self now. The blue and yellow uniform doesn't suit him AT. ALL. But we don't have to deal with it too much longer...

Uncanny X-Men #277

See... I told you Claremont was gonna do this again, lol.

Uncanny X-Men #277

The nice thing about this whole space arc is that Gambit really gets to come into his own. He now looks cool (note the red eyes are here!). He's doing fun stuff. He's taking on Wolverine and holding his own. He's being smart and tactical and an asset. They've paired him with some great X-Men to start off with, and it's paying off.

Meanwhile, we don't really know much about him. As many of the other characters state, his background is shrouded in mystery... (whether you like what it actually is can be debated as we get to it). But for now, he's intriguing as a new comer.

And this is where we're at as two story lines come crashing together and our two romantic leads get to meet for the first time.... off panel.

But I'll get more into that next time when I discuss... The Muir Island Saga!

[weirdmarioenemies]

When you think of enemies from Super Mario Bros. 2, who comes to mind? Personally, one of the first that comes to MY mind are those weird birds that you find as early as World 1. The borderline flightless ones that were colored red, white and black in the original, but weirdly got some purple coloring in the All-Stars remake — the ones who weirdly barely appeared again. You know,

Name: Pidgit

Debut: Super Mario Bros. 2/ Yume Kōjō: Doki Doki Panic

Did I actually trick anyone into thinking today’s enemy would be sweet old Tweeter? I don’t know if Tweeter is well-known enough to get that kind of anticipation!

Regardless, Pidgit’s a weird enemy, to be certain! Of course, one could say almost all Super Mario Bros. 2 enemies are weird, but “flightless crow riding on a carpet” is a bit more weird than enemies like “walking bomb”, “walking cactus”, and “bird that drops walking bomb”.

And that’s right: despite its name, Pidgit is a crow, which is not a pigeon at all! It is actually more wrong to name Pidgit after a pigeon than it is to name a gorilla enemy with some sort of hare-related pun in mind. And that’s science!

However, even its original Japanese name is just a portmanteau of “dodo” and “Rodrigues solitaire”, both of which are pigeons…this is Pidgit’s Trick.

This guy’s an oddball, one that didn’t debut in a Mario game and has had very few reappearances since, but has left an inescapable impact since. Before that, though, let’s cherish the reappearances it HAS had!

Pidgit’s first reappearance is a weird one—instead of riding a magic carpet, it finds itself being blasted out of Turtle Cannons in Fall as the Pidgit Bill! Super Mario World sure seems pretty fond of Super Mario Bros. 2, and this might be one of its most blatant callbacks. Funnily enough, in the SNES version only horizontally-moving Bullet Bills get replaced, which seems fine until you realize Super Mario World also introduces vertically- and diagonally-inclined Bullet Bills. Woopsie!

Pidgit Bills appear in the ending of Super Princess Peach, too, congratulating the player! That’s cute.

Pidgit’s next appearance would be another weird one. Wario’s Woods has it be one of Wario’s goons, replacing the fairy when Wario appears on the upper right screen to drop only bombs. Remember when Wario was a villain who could have minions? Yeah. Pidgit can fly here without a carpet at all, no foolin’! Is this part of the spell Wario put over his Woods? Is this why Pidgits fight for him? I don’t know! I think they just forgot.

They wouldn’t reappear until Partners in Time, and wow! This might actually be their only in-game reappearance where they actually ride their carpets! Which reminds me, do Pidgits make their own carpets, or do they get them from somewhere, or…?

I’ve never had nor played this game so I don’t know exactly how they act, but what I do know is that in the American version, they’re stronger and more likely to drop loot than any other version! That’s fun.

Do you remember 12 paragraphs ago, when you still had your youth and I said we’d get back to how Pidgit left an inescapable impact on the franchise? Well, that time is now, and that inescapable impact is the Lakitu!

“But Weirdma Rio Enemies dot Tumblr dot Com!,” you cry. “Lakitu debuted in Super Mario Bros., before Doki Doki Panic and thus long before Super Mario Bros. 2 was even conceived!” And on that, you’re right. But let’s look at an attribute unique to Pidgit!

You see, Pidgit rides a magic carpet, yes, but when it’s picked up, the player can ride the carpet themselves temporarily — after a certain amount of time, though, the carpet starts flashing before disappearing completely. Sound familiar?

Sounds a lot like Lakitu’s Cloud, if you ask me! While Lakitus have been riding their fair-weather friends since 1985, we weren’t privy to that same experience till long after Super Mario Bros. 2, in a little game called…Super Mario World! In a game which already has Pidgit, is it truly at all absurd to say it would have just one more reference to it?

So remember, in every game where you can ride a truculent terrapin’s silly cirrus, be sure to thank your local Pidgit!

…man, too bad we couldn’t segue into at least something about Tweeter, huh? First they were bought out by a rich muskrat, now this. Is there anything Tweeterheads get to look forward to?

the answer is ME!!!!!!

Hi!! I’m Mod Tweeter, and today’s post was written by none other than moi! It’s a real tweat and an honour to join the cast of Oddball Red-Cloaked-Daisy Critters, and I hope you will all enjoy my writings about more sillybeasts in the future!

For now, let’s close this post with a smooth songbird’s swingin’ serenade…

[bangchansgirlsblog]

My Biggest Regret

Part three: 18+

**

Another successful show had the whole band panting and huffing from exhaustion.

The boys all laid on the different couches in their backstage room trying to calm down and discussing the events that had just occurred.

All of them were changed out of their outfits and were now in comfy clothes since they had all taken showers.

Their minions were running around getting them whatever they wanted and treating them like royalty.

“Hey Chan are we still spending thanksgiving with your parents?” Han asked the group leader as he was scrolling through the flight app looking for tickets home for the Christmas holiday.

“Yeah, my mum says all of you must come,” Chan was texting one of the managers trying to figure out their schedule for the next few weeks before they would get a flight back to Australia. He hadn’t been home for a few years and he couldn’t wait.

He wanted everything to be perfect. He didn’t want anything to come up like the other times he tried to go home.

“Do you know when we’re leaving?” Changbin asked looking up from his phone. His body was aching hence the reason why he was on the floor using a massage ball trying to release the tight notes in his back.

“We’ll have a meeting about it in a few days so we will find out then,” Changbin took note and continued to massage his muscles as everyone continued having small talk.

“Are we headed out tonight?” Seungmin asked the boys.

“Yeah definitely, I need to get laid tonight,” Hyunjin sat up and tied his hair up in a bun trying to check himself out in the big mirror. A normal thing he did.

“Bro, last time you said that I couldn’t sleep that night. If your getting laid, your getting laid at whoever’s home you chose,” I.N gags and stares at his Hyung who also looked very much shy at the fact that his little brother had heard him doing the deed.

“Uh! Hyunjin that’s so disgusting,” Felix scolds Hyunjin.

“Alright are we going to just talk all night or head out?” Hyunjin changed the subject. They all laugh and joke around but head into hair and makeup to get ready for the party.

The party was for idols only so there was definitely going to be alchohol, drugs and everything they desired.

Being a kpop idol with a clean image meant that they couldn’t do anything wrong in public but in private they were all a menace. The wild parties that ended up either with people throwing up in the pool or people blacking out on chairs and floors proved it.

Chan…When chan first debuted he had no idea it would be like this but he enjoyed it. He enjoyed being free and having alchohol run through his veins causing an adrenaline rush. He loved dancing till his feet hurt but most especially he loved the ladies.

He loved that fact that he was so famous, handsome and rich he would get any woman he desired. They all could, so it was no suprise that Chan was dating the smoking hot cheek who was new to the block.

He didn’t really know her name but he knew that she made him look good and that’s what mattered.

“Nice watch Hannie,” Leeknow complimented Han. The car was packed but they all could fit in.

“Yeah, it’s real Gold, it costed me a fortune.” He boasted and showed everyone the blinging watch that had diamonds all over.

“Don’t lose it, you know how you get when your on substances Hyung,” I.N pushes Han playfully and they start a playful little fight.

“Hey! Watch the suit! Watch the suit!” Hyunjin scolds the boys who were now out breath. They all ended up bursting out in laughter.

When they arrived, they were welcomed in with so much love and joy. Everybody loved the boys. Who wouldn’t? If people weren’t trying to get into their pants they were trying to get into their wallets and if they weren’t trying to get into their wallets they were trying to get their spotlight. This caused all of them to be cautious about the people around them but still they chose to be friendly to everyone and to talk to everyone.

The party was fun. Everyone was enjoying themselves. Hyunjin was surrounded by girls…well all of them except Chan who was with his girlfriend.

He was out of his mind and senseless. The alchohol slowly diluting in his blood.

The girl, Xio, was dancing all of him. His body was hot under his jacket so he took it off. His girlfriend now kissing and grinding all up on him.

“Wanna go somewhere quiet?” She whispered in his ear making him crave her even more. He was hungry for her. He needed her but not for the right reasons.

He needed her to use her for his sexual frustrations.

He smirks and puts his drink down. One hand wrapped around her waist as he drags her to the nearest room possible.

“I want you so bad Y/n,” he moans as he ripped her clothes off.

“Y/n? Who’s Y/n?” She furrows her eyebrows in confusion and looks up at the man who had now realized his mistake.

Fuck.

Meanwhile in Australia. Y/n was sat home with her mum when she recieved a text from Hannah. She hadn’t expected it. Her breathing hitched and excitement grew in her body. She couldn’t believe her eyes but something in her new that this was going to be a rough journey. The words rolled off her tongue painfully yet so easily.

Hannah Bhang🥰: Chan comes home in 2 weeks.

Butterflies were filling her stomach. Her hands were shaking as she thought of what to reply. She had so much to do. The love of her life was coming back home. Would she cry? Laugh? Panic? What was he like now? Tall? Buff? Was he still funny? Goofy? Or was he now mature? Was his curls still intact?

She was worried about things that were the least of her problems because little did she know the “love of her life” was currently receiving a blowjob on a bathroom floor.

**

[mycatsaidwhat]

things i’ve heard college students say pt. 28

-i wonder if they’ll make a musical for cocaine bear 

-no disrespect to the Amish community but it would be a lot cooler if they were pirates 

-if I saw a minion in person I’d put it in a microwave 

-y’all be hating on meter maids and then say you want to fuck the rabbit from Zootopia  

-the Godfather is so good, I wish Italians were real

-everyone wants a goth girlfriend until she squeezes her used tampons onto you and says she likes blood play 

-submissive women in STEM, call her biodegradable 

-this edible is beating my ass cause now there’s bugs in my skin and i need a man 

- “do not announce on Yik Yak when you are going to masterbate” we’re literally living in 1984

-i wish on your birthday CVS would you a free Plan B like Dutch Bros gives you a free drink

-the tornado missed us cause someone told us it had to pay a cover for each bar it destroyed 

-its an American Cultures class, Zach, occasionally we’re gonna discuss RuPaul

-we all joke about the tour groups looking at us like we’re zoo animals but can it be a petting zoo instead? Hand feed me bitch I’m starving 

-(damn girl I’d suck the eggs outta your ovary like boba) 

Nice job Paul, you found the line! 

-if you skip class but go to office hours it cancels out, its PEMDAS 

-don’t mind me just gnawing on a hunk of parmesan like a dog 

-i love answering the phone hello love, i wish British people were real 

-we’re a drinking school with a liberal arts problem

-frat boys be like damn, I got Title IX violations due tomorrow 

-girls will have an STD and still call themselves a snack, like okay food poisoning 

-do you really take an 8am if you don’t tell everyone around you that you’re taking an 8am

-hey girl, since that tornado didn’t blow your back out, can I?

-how you gonna be a communication major and not text me back 

-sure Europe has less school shootings, but how many lifted dodge pick ups do y’all got over there?

-I need a nap. I need vodka. I need a 159% on the final to get an A in the class 

-no offense but some of y’all’s rose tattoos look like cabbage 

-eggs be so expensive, I be hiding them in my hoochie at the store and then laying them myself when I get home 

[seldomdrawncherubs]

Cal. we wanna see you talking to Dirk.

GIVE THAT TO uS OuR YAOI MASTER

THE ANONS HuNGER. TO SEE THE YAOIEST OF INTERACTIONS. AND I WILL INDuLGE.

OF COuRSE I EXPECT PAYMENT. WHEN I CONQuER YOuR WORLD. I EXPECT PRAISES. AND LOYALTY. TO YOuR NEW OVERLORD. AND YOu WILL ALSO GIVE ME ALL YOuR CANDY.

[undyingumbrage began jeering timaeusTestified]

uu: DIRK. YOu WILL DRAW SOMETHING FOR ME.

TT: Okay. Anything for his supreme majesty of manly men making out.

uu: YOu WILL REFRAIN FROM SuCH VuLGARITY WHILST DRAWING THE SACRED ART FORM.

TT: Of course. God forbid two men kiss in the two men kissing genre.

uu: EXACTLY. NOW DRAW MY HuMANSONA IN HIS MANLY COAT. AND DRAW YOu. AS MY ADORING DISCIPLE.

TT: Cool.

*timaeusTestified sent an image!*

uu: EXCELLENT.

uu: NOW. DRAW MY HuMANSONA. EXTENDING A HAND. IN A GESTuRE MANY WOuLD CONSIDER FOuL.

TT: Okay.

*timaeusTestified sent an image!*

uu: NOT THAT GESTuRE. THOuGH I DO APPRECIATE YOuR RENDITION. OF MY SIGNATuRE tumut

uu: NO. I AM REFERRING TO THE LEWD GESTuRE. OF TENDERLY HOLDING HANDS. WITH OuR YAOI HANDS. AS THE MANLIEST ALPHA BROS DO.

TT: Utterly depraved.

*timaeusTestified sent an image!*

uu: EXCELLENT WORK, MINION.

uu: BY THE WAY. MY STuPID SISTER. HAS A PERVERSE "CRuSH" ON YOu.

uu: I AM ASSERTING DOMINANCE. BY TELLING HER SECRET HERE. BECAuSE SHE DID NOT LEAVE ME ANY ICE CREAM.

TT: Are you sure it's me she's got a crush on?

uu: THE ROXY BITCH SAID "gud luck gettin ovr ur crush on dirk" IN HER NOTE TO MY SISTER.

TT: Well, then. That's a bit of a surprise. I don't feel that way about her, though.

uu: OF COuRSE YOu DON'T. YOu RECEIVE THE ATTENTION OF THE FINEST SPECIMEN OF THE ALPHA MALE CHERuB. NEARLY EVERY DAY.

uu: NOTHING AN uGLY BETA FEMALE LIKE HER. COuLD COMPARE TO.

TT: I'm simply overwhelmed with the sheer power of it all. Your combination of insults to several of my close friends and demands for free art has wooed me better than any of Callie's politeness ever could.

uu: OBVIOuSLY. NOW DRAW THE JAKE HuMAN. HOLDING HANDS WITH ANOTHER YOu. THE YOU WHO IS GLASSES.

TT: Scandalous. Lil Hal doesn't even have hands.

THIS CONVERSATION LASTED MuLTIPLE HOuRS OF JEERING, ART, AND WHAT WAS TOTALLY NOT SARCASM. I DISPLAYED MY MASTERY OF THE MYSTERIOuS POWER FOREIGN TO MY SISTER. KNOWN AS "THE RIZZ". HE ALSO DREW A "PONY SONA" OF ME. AS A COLORFUL HORSE WITH WINGS. WITHOUT EVEN BEING ASKED.

I AM SuCH AN ALPHA CHAD. THAT DIRK IS AT MY BECK AND CALL. uNLIKE ROXY. WHO IS INCAPABLE OF CREATING THE YAOI. AND MY SISTER. WHO IS INCAPABLE OR REQuESTING SuCH A THING.

[skrimbleeowo]

every inside joke ive ever had.

knee surgery, skin pikachu, when the apple is fresh, gug, guh, blue, horse, the horses are coming, making out on the jouch behind taco bell at 5pm wearing the sour cream and onion lays thigh highs, pidgeon milk, gay deer, listen to the horses, anthony do you hear the distant clip cloping of the hooves?, grips your thigh, how i look at bro when he grabs my balls and twists, 97 sobbing horses, five and a half lemons, shaves you bald and licks your head, dead dog center, i cant wait to eat abstract colors, gently smiling stalon, chortles, the gayng plus airy for no specific reason, bald ass marx remove his hat, certified freak seven sheds a week, people would rather top a twink than stop and think, hello cro, the wall of shame, give it brown eye contacts i beg, bacteria, the horse man, pees, 🚷, hey gang almost drowned 🍴, EW EW EW NOT THIS FUCKI G BRID AGAIN, this sausgage im eating is like sooo good 🤤, together we are mepreg, beef, king dedede in the skittles packet on the wall, calougtromis, Constipated turbo 💞 on the shelf☝️, wolfrun he has flea 💕, do you feel, the splunger, firey ass, crying mort, slungus, 😹😹 the green one is here 😹, do not laugh the pig knows, clip being??, i want to be the slime man, club pengiun is kill, smiling egg dog, special finger, dry oatmeal, devious ahh chicken tender, niquil chicken, red aiden, the nefious angler fish, the family friend, joker piss, cheezits, the soggy goldfish incident, they hit the twink towers never faggot, aawagga, a whole spoingus, marxs quest for the sacred pepis, i just lost my dog, fourse, zims massive fucking fourhead, click the bart, gayng and the adopted chortles, the rat man, hello starlight, clutching my pearls, hey fazgang, i got that dog in me the dog, close twitter for the love of starclan, go my shithound, thread canceled antfarm go, i hope the bugs find him, shittsing, discreetly glances at your balls, ecuador, randal you cant say that word, could you repeat that, agony, fear, up my giant purple ass, bruh we in a mcchicken, furry divorce image, tompson dingletoes the 2st, meowing audio, baby limb ripper, rejoyce, horse instincts, minion ass, i smell y’all, soggy marx, hes so babygirl, all i see is a fruit, the freddy room, Pay that CHILD SUPPORT 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑💥💥💥💥💥💥💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸, ball cancer, uhm pin wrong finger, 🛷📳, does it jiggle leafy i swear to fucking god, diary stealer island stealer wish stealer, fawful gave me backshots😁⭐⭐⭐🙂🙂🙂💖💖💖💖🌼🌼🌼🌸🌺🌺🌷🌷🌹🌺🌷🌷😁😁😁😁😁🌈🌈🌈🙂🙂🙂, transgender marx cake, horse plinko, the gaylist, check it face eyes, marvullous bleeding rodent, invader zim obby, hairless cat shamura, furry dan, i hope you like bees!! 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝, penisland, the lemon cellector, what if instead of cum you released a hive of bees from your dick, alvin and the faggots, 𓃗, Prokaryote, holy SHIT this is estrogen city in here!!, slurp, oh no.. 🚶🧎💻 , the marx hole, my fucking uterus, glass, john egbert, NEW KITCHEN GUN!!!!!! SPARKLES LIKE NEW, mom broke up with dad <:[ 😭 i have anxiety O_O, 17, the horses are rapidly approaching 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎, she 4 on my lung till i 20$, the end is never the end is never the end is never the end the end is never the end is never the end is never the end the end is never the end, the slop, organ failure, freak jr, partplauge mpreg, what hi bye hi, hey hey hey, smile always, violet leapfrog dog, liam hfjone, im naming my pussy david now, jesterspace, why would she do that 🙁, did he peed 🙁, i hate when we have grass for lunch please domt say hate, lean four, leo bass bro pyrimid, mario pussy attack, GAY (for you!!), Haha Jonathan, **gas leak**, revisiting my divorced husband, penith, freaky time, greetings and salutations, seattle esex, bens loving the ☀️☀️ today!, im geeking, ocasionally neighing, 60 year old man named hugo, 7 hours and 12 minutes, 2 hours and 33 minutes, the critters, richard, GGLLGAG, think, whatever go my scarb, magestic horse, pea screaming, ren contemplating, do hear👂that? the ❌ is coming, me when i wake up, soggy, autism