#yes i'm autistic how could you tell?
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can't wait to pirate the new season of dw
#me + my personal vendetta against rtd#i am just feeling really eh with the show after the 60th specials#it has been five(ish) months and i still hate what rtd did with biregeneration that i can't bring myself to care about it#why would i when it isn't technically the doctor and the tardis anymore? it's just a copy#yes i'm autistic how could you tell?#also the whole millie stuff? like rtd just seems crappy to his actors#anti rtd#dw#rtd critical
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"Did you know that you have a tell?"
"A tell?"
"Yes, a tell. A crack in your poker face." Cyno rolled his eyes at the suggestion. "I'm the general Mahamatra, Tighnari, I cannot afford to have a tell."
"It's a tell specific to your TCG game," Tighnari's smile was barely visible as he peered over his deck, but the humour was clear in his eyes. "You're not funny," Cyno frowned. "I'm not trying to be, dear."
"Go on then," Cyno began after rolling his dice, "what is it?"
"What's what?" Tighnari hummed as he grabbed the dice for his own turn rolling. "My tell," Cyno said, placing down a strategize card. "And why would I tell you that? Tsk tsk Cyno, don't you know I want to win," Tighnari's taunting grin grew behind his cards. "You're the one who brought it up," Cyno huffed, playing a support card. “And you're the one with only one character left, I just wanted to let you know why,” Tighnari said, the teasing lilt of his voice forcing Cyno to glare.
“You haven't won yet,” Cyno grumbled as he attacked, dealing 3 damage to one of Tighnari's last two characters. “No,” Tighnari conceded, beginning his round by equipping a weapon, “but I'm about to.” Tighnari used his ultimate, leaving Cyno’s card with 1 health. “I hope you have some food cards, sweetheart,” Tighnari said, “though I know you don't.”
“You don't know that," Cyno said, eyebrows furrowed as he searched through his hand. “But I do. As previously mentioned, Cyno, you have a tell.”
All Cyno could do at this point was attack again, though the 2 damage it dealt did very little when both Tighnari's cards had consumed food cards. He barely managed to break one character’s shield. Tighnari forced out a yawn. “Done?” His mocking smile served only to further frustrate Cyno. The other man nodded.
“My turn, general,” Tighnari smiled, looking through his hand. Cyno groaned. “Why bother looking through your cards when you're obviously going to win now?” Cyno asked, shoulders and jaw tensed for defeat. “Because it's fun seeing how worked up you get,” Tighnari said, “you're a terribly sore loser, dear.” With that, Tighnari used a card to switch character without ending his turn, before equipping a bow and attacking.
As the final blow to Cyno's card- and his ego- was dealt, Tighnari's smile softened. "Your tell, my love, is non-existent. I was merely bluffing to throw you off your game," Tighnari stood up and, with a kiss to the other man's temple, left the flustered general to stew in his frustration at being so easily tricked.
#silly Cyno#what could you even have a tell for in tcg#Anyway#yes this is how they flirt#yes it's because they're autistic little nerds#and yes I adore them#uhhh what else#i haven't played tcg in a while so sorry if anythings off#And sorry if there's any mistakes I'm tired I don't want to proof read#And thanks for the love on my last lil thing <33#genshin#genshin impact#cynonari#domestic cynonari#autistic cyno#cynonari drabble#my writing#autistic tighnari also#uhhh what else PAHA#cynonari fic#its short but sweet#Ok bye
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Maybe I am autistic.......
#Reflection/semi-vent incoming#I just ranted in my head about how I hate that people don't make their tone clear on the internet#And how the line between jokes sarcasm irony etc. and genuineness have been blurred so much#I just want people to be clear and upfront about their feelings... Then I thought “hang on isn't this what autistic people are on about”#OBVIOUSLY this isn't exclusive to autism (or even a symptom of neurodivergency)#I've just been.. thinking. I've always wondered ever since my irl friend asked if I've ever considered myself autistic#Let me tell you a secret dear friend: I've always considered it ever since I was a kid#But when I brought that concern up with my parents they laughed at me and made fun of me calling me an attention seeker#And I've been forcing myself to not even think of the possibility that I'm neurodivergent anymore#But... maybe. Maybe I am. It's so scary to think about using the language on myself#I just wish I could figure this out easily and get a clear yes or no. I wish this was easier.#chris p fried what?!
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Collecting the people's opinion bc I don't know how to draw my trans guy Sigma's chest hair
#shaved/none is absolutely not an option!!!#polls#bsd#bungou stray dogs#sigma#serek#bsd sigma#sigma bsd#headcanons#I NEED THE DATA#GIVE ME THE DATA#IT'S IMPORTANT RESEARCH#yes I'm an autistic that overexplains how could you tell
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I will never forget the day my former boss looked me dead in the eyes on my orientation day and said: I'm a great judge of character. I can tell that you're an extrovert.
Me nervously laughing because every time I had interacted with this man I was masking my ass off to get this job and most certainly was NOT an extrovert but also didn't want to somehow risk my new job by saying otherwise: Yep! You got me!
#there was also this one time i got this male customer by himself at noon so ofc he just had to talk to me#and this bitch literally asked are you always this bubbly?#and i said yes ya know like a liar#because wtf else am i supposed to say?#no i'm actually never like this and if my wages didn't come from GENEROUS tips of my customers i'd never show a single ounce of emotion#bc im autistic (didnt know it at the time tho) and i really hate dealing with bitches like you first thing in the morning#and then this bitch had the NERVE to ask me YoU wErE rAiSeD bY ChRisTiaNs WeReNT yOu?#and i was so shocked i didn't know how to respond and ended up fumbling out I'm actually not Christian#AND THIS MOFO HAD THE AUDACITY TO SAY oh i can tell but that's not what I asked#LIKE BITCH WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE#so me just wanting desperately for this conversation to be over i nervously say yes#and he says yeah i can tell you were raised by a good family#WHEN I TELL YOU THIS WAS THE CLOSEST I EVER CAME TO BREAKING I COULD FEEL MY EYE TWITCHING WITH HOW ANGRY I WAS#I SWEAR I WAS ALMOST SCREAMING AT THIS MAN ABOUT HOW TRAUMATIC IT WAS GROWING UP WITH A CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIAN FAMILY#luckily i kept my composure (and my job) and awkwardly replied haha yeah... i should go check if your food is done now#AND WHEN I TELL YOU I FUCKIN SPRINTED TO THE KITCHEN#istg you couldn't pay me all the money in the world to work customer service ever again#fuck that fuck olive garden and fuck that guy in particular#there's reason you was eatin lunch alone bitch
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ngl having low empathy expression is wiiiild fr. like someone could be talkin to you about how everyone in their family died and now they have no one and you're just like "damn dude that sucks lol - anyways uhhhh want me to get you a slushy"
#“yes i'm autistic with NPD traits how could you tell?” ahh post#like really why am i like this fr /nav#autism things#npd things
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One exhausting thing about being fat is the endless understanding and forgiveness you have to have to maintain any personal relationships. I overhear my mother saying how disgusted she is by fat Autistics. I’m a fat autistic. I can’t say anything about how deeply hurtful this is without being sensitive. My friend says only fat people will die of covid, so it’s not such a big deal. So I don’t deserve to live? Or the classic:“Ew I’m getting fat”. If you start a fight each time someone around you implies you don’t deserve life or your body is vile, you’ll spend your whole existence arguing.
I empathize with this so much, anon. My family (and some friends) are SO deeply invested in diet culture and fatphobia. I have a parent who is a lobbyist for the pharmaceutical company that sells ozempic and wegovy, and no amount of education or asking for human empathy will change their mind or make them treat me better. It's a hard reality to accept that you can't change everyone's minds. and it is so, so tiring and emotionally exhausting to have to advocate for your existence 24/7. I get burned out doing it too often. The thing is, you don't have to offer endless forgiveness. I'm currently working with my therapist on what to do about this, and the unfortunate solution is to set harsh boundaries (yes, even if they will never understand it or think I am too sensitive, or crazy... it is VERY uncomfortable but I am working on being okay with being misunderstood!) and distance myself from people who refuse to respect said boundaries. Next time my parent berates my food choices, tells me I'm going to die young, or compares me to an anti-vaxxer for not losing weight, I'm removing myself from their presence and tell them these types of comments are driving me away. If they want me in their life, they'll learn to respect me. It hurts, and it's so fucking hard when it's immediate family.
As for non-familial relationships, I've curated my social circle to (mostly) friends who are fat positive and it's one of the best things I could have done for my wellbeing. If I meet a potential friend who starts spitting some fatphobic bull, I avoid hanging out with them from the get-go. I've met most of my fat positive friends in social groups made for fat people, check out facebook groups to see if there's any fat community in your area!
Tbh I have always had this idea of carrying around little pamphlets or cards that are like fat liberation 101 for strangers, I would keep them in my pocket to hand out to someone who says something fatphobic to me so I can avoid confrontation (and exhaustion)... if I made those would you guys want them? 👀
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Arranged marriage?
Chapter two.
Royal au
Pairing: princess (to be queen) Natasha X autistic queen reader.
Warnings: Natasha being an asshole. (She gets better... Just not yet.) Natasha getting feelings?
Y/n pov:
The gardens. Meant to be peaceful and calming. But unfortunately I have another meeting with a seething princess Romanoff. She's mad because of how our last interaction went. Me having a meltdown over scrolls and books. Well Natasha calls it a meltdown. I call it being rationally upset over precious history being damaged. But I don't think I could get away with telling Natasha to leave again so I let her rant. Not that I'm listening. I've always been terrible at that..
"are you even listening to me!?"
I'm startled out of my thoughts by those angry words. I glance at Natasha again. I blink slightly as I register the question.
"oh uh.. no."
I then realised that's probably the wrong response as Natasha goes into another loud rant. I'm surprised she's known for her rich kingdom and powerful presence and not overly loud rants that don't need to happen. I would much rather be on the molten wyrm walk down in the southern parts of my kingdom that's happening right now but princess Romanoffs family insisted we meet up today at this time. It's as if the entire family doesn't want me to enjoy my dragons.
"yes princess Romanoff I apologise for my insolent behaviour from our last conversation."
The words come like clockwork. The amount of times I've apologised to this woman I don't even know. But then again it may not be that many since I never counted. I stand up wanting to at least try and get this meeting to come to some sort of an agreeable end and I offer my hand to Natasha.
"perhaps you would entertain a walk with me around my gardens?"
Natasha pov:
I'm pissed. Very very pissed. I'm meant to marry an incompetent woman who seems to have no dignity or self confidence. She's a push over but perhaps this could be useful in further advances to kill her later on. I despise the fact that y/n is offering a walk. As if I would like to walk with her. I would like to shove a knife in her skull. But I can't. Not until we marry and my parents are content. So I shall have to agree.
"very well then. Let us hope your insolent nature doesn't intrude this time."
I scowl as I take queen y/n's hand. And despite the fact I despise the queen with every inch of my existence I must admit her hands are soft and warm. But I ignore it and walk.
Thus far this walk has been uninteresting and a disappointment all round. And I've made that known by complaints. Queen y/n seems to be taking it well. But I doubt she's listening. That wretched woman never is. It's always dragons with her. Something wyrm this something serpent that. Nobody cares about the creatures because of how common it is to find plant drakes and poison lily wyverns in one's garden or even a mouse dragon in one's walls. But it seems as though this woman is stuck on the things.
"and did you know that while Treetailed pixie dragons are commonly found small and the size of someone's palm they actually grow to be the height of any other tree but nobody notices them because of their specially designed tails. So if you look close enough in woods or even orchards you might find one living there unnoticed."
Queen y/n spouts. She's been talking about these dragons nonstop since we were walking. The only break I get is my complaints about how the walk is stupid. I glare down at y/n as she keeps yapping away. But I'm caught off guard when my immediate first thought is she's cute.
Now I'm upset with myself. Why was that my first thought. Queen y/n is anything but cute. She's a weird queen who holds no grasp over her kingdom and is obsessed over common creatures such as dragons. Though I suppose the ones she mentions are ones I never learned about. And it's endearing when she rants. I internally smack myself at that thought. No. Absolutely not. Y/n is not cute or endearing. She's annoying and weak. And she'll be just another murder under my belt in a few more years.
Y/n pov:
I hardly focus on princess Romanoff beside me as I talk. I had spotted a Bumblefluff quetzalcoatl and hadn't stopped talking about dragons since. Though I can see Natasha getting upset with me about it. I internally sigh as I slow down my rant. Perhaps I should be known for my rants considering I do it as much as Natasha. Only my ants are useful. Not mean. Like princess Romanoffs are.
I glance over at said princess and notice her deep in thought with herself. She looks angry. I suppose that's my fault. Must've said something to annoy her. Though it could've been my entire speech. I don't know. Reading people is hard no matter what anyone tells me.
"princess are you ok?"
I'm asking, trying not to be rude like Natasha herself is. I hope it doesn't come across as nosy. I never can tell how people will take my inquiries. Almost always to offense though.
"does it look like I'm ok!?"
Natasha snarls. I never knew she could snarl like that. It was almost animalistic. Too real. I flinch away slightly and fidget with my fingers. There's no books to take my attention away here. I sigh and shake my head.
"no."
I mumble softly. Though this causes a worse reaction out of Natasha. Now she's yelling about how stupid am to ask if she's ok when she's definitely not. I was trying to be nice. But I guess she took it the wrong way. I dodge one of Natasha's hands as she flails them around as she screeches at me for the millionth time. I let her get it out of her system before talking again.
"I apologise princess."
*I speak gently. I hate when people yell at me. Their screaming irritates my ears. I'll avoid social interaction for a while after this. Maybe forever. That sounds nicer than a life condemned to princess Natasha Romanoff. I sigh and keep walking. Now in silence with Natasha. Until I see another Bumblefluff quetzalcoatl and get excited again.
I rush over but slow as I near the small dragon. It's on a lead as of current looking between an orange or yellow flower. I sit a bit away and watch in silence as the small Quetzalcoatl goes about its business. And by the colours it's a female. The yellow and black have been dulled to a near white and grey. The makes are normally brighter and have twinges of orange in the larger ones. I practically squeal with delight as I watch the Bumblefluff quetzalcoatl.
Natasha pov:
I ranted to y/n. This time about my frustrations with her and her dragon obsession. I also slipped the fact I'm going to murder her. Only to test if the queen listens. She doesn't even comment on it. Though I feel guilty when I see y/n flinch. That's not what I had intended. I stop screaming after a few moments and our walk falls to silence. Until queen y/n exits my side and rushes over to a second bumble fizz cutie colt or whatever she said it's name was.
I groan lightly as I stop walking and watch the woman who's meant to be a queen act like a young princess. But y/n does look adorable as she watches the funny dragon she's examining. Wait now she doesn't. Y/n is a frail queen I'll destroy when the time is right.
Y/n is not adorable, endearing or cute. Y/n is not adorable, endearing or cute. Y/n is not adorable, endearing or cute. It's like my fucking mantra now. I'm just repeating it over and over in my skull. Me and the queen are walking again and the gardens end is in view. I practically jump in delight but that's not queenly behaviour so I don't. I'm just trying to keep myself together for the remainder of this horrid walk. Queen y/n is yapping about small dragons again. I'm forcing myself to think it's rancid. And I'm mad I'm needing to force that opinion when it should be natural.
I try not to make a happy noise as the gardens finally come to an end and me and y/n are back where we began. Though I know I'm probably glowing. I can leave. And hammer in the thoughts of queen y/n being only an obstacle again. These thoughts of the queen being sweet are hindering my plan to assassinate her later. I won't have that.
"it seems our walk has ended. And just in time too I need to leave."
I speak in a passive aggressive tone. Though I don't think y/n realises I'm was being passive aggressive since she agrees with me. I hurry over the goodbyes. Desperate to leave this dreaded castle and it's dreaded owner and her dreaded influence over my mind. I eventually get out of the castle grounds and I'm back in my carriage. Going home. I need to get my priorities straight again before these thoughts get in my way.
A/n: I decided to write a Nat pov for this chapter since I could imagine how her side of this interaction would go. Not all chapters will be spilt povs but some of them will. Hope this suffices as a chapter.
Taglist:
@cd-4848
If you want to be added to the tag list ask in the comments :)
#natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff x reader#natasha x you#black widow#natasha x y/n#natasha romanoff x fem!reader#black widow x reader
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Whumptober Masterlist/Overview
Hey guys! I'm going to be attempting to participate in Whumptober this year (though admittedly I did kind of mash together a few different prompt lists). I have about 20 days planned out right now, and I really hope to get through them, but no guarantees unfortunately, because I do have other stuff going on in my life. Also most of these are in fact just going to be hurt/comfort because I am a weak man. Also yes I am aware that the variation in these characters is kind of insane, don't come at me.
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Day One - Survivors Guilt/"It's not your fault." - Robert 'Bob' Floyd - An accident during a training hop leaves your WSO badly injured, and you can't help but blame yourself. Bob makes it his mission to convince you otherwise.
Day Two - Migraines - Darry Curtis - Juggling a migraine and the Curtis gang is not the easiest thing in the world. Luckily, Darry is there to come to your rescue and tell the others off
Day Three - Overstimulation - Diego Hargreeves - (1960s, autistic Reader) - Between the prison break, Diego's strange brother, and home movie footage showing the assassination of the president, your not sure how much more you can take.
Day Four- Field medicine/"Hang on, we're going to have to improvise." - Fili - Even with the battle beginning to turn in your favor, there are still many losses to come, no matter how hard you work to prevent them.
Day Five - "You don't need to earn this." - Tommy Shelby - When your surprises and gentle treatment catch Tommy by surprise, he questions what he'd done to deserve it.
Day Six - Hostile environment/"I don't know how anyone could survive that." - Alfie Solomons - (War Era, Male Reader) - A poorly planned attack leaves you stuck in no mans land. Even if you make it back to the so called "safety" of the English trenches, nothing will ever be the same.
Day Seven - Needles/Stitching - John Shelby - After being sent on another needless errand by his brother, John returns late, exhausted and bloody.
Day Eight - Panic Attack - Aaron Hotchner - When a case that hits too close to home has too many missing pieces, and seemingly no end, you can't help but fall prey to a growing sense of panic.
Day Nine - Falling Asleep in a hospital room - Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw - When a training incident gone wrong lands Bradley in the hospital, you take it upon yourself to stay with him.
Day Ten - "Shhh, I've got you now, I'm here." - Alfie Solomons - Sabini's men kidnap you in a desperate attempt to get a leg up on your husband. When Alfie finds out, he's ready to burn the world down to get to you.
Day Eleven - Chronic pain - Boromir - The first day of a cold spell causes your pain to flare up, but you're determined to grit your teeth through the pain. Boromir however, is determined to get you to rest.
Days Twelve - Fourteen Break Days
Day Fifteen - Hiding an Injury - Aragorn - Somewhere in the thicket of Helms Deep, you're injured, but in the chaos that follows, doing anything about it seems to slip your mind.
Day Sixteen - "I did good, right?" - Umbrella Academy Unit - A mission gone wrong forces you to over use your powers, pushing you too far.
Day Seventeen - Bleeding Through Bandages - Kili - After being injured in escaping the Orcs, Oin does his best to heal you, but miles down the road, it doesn't seem to be enough.
Day Eighteen - Nightmare - Alfie Solomons - Night after night, you are plagued with nightmares, and Alfie seems to be the only thing that can cure them.
Day Nineteen - Scars - Diego Hargreeves - While patching Diego up after a fight, you see his scars for the first time.
Day Twenty - "Who did this to you?" - Dallas Winston - You get jumped, Dally plots revenge.
Day Twenty One - "You haven't done anything wrong." - Aaron Hotchner - (Autistic reader) - After a particularly long day, you find yourself overwhelmed and unsure. Luckily Aaron is there to help you calm down, no matter how much you protest.
Day Twenty Two - Chronic Pain (again) - Alife Solomons - Getting Alfie to take a day off when his sciatica is bothering him is a full time job.
Day Twenty Three - Exhaustion - Darry Curtis - Darry has been working himself to the utter bone. You take it upon yourself to make him rest.
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These might not get posted consecutively, but I'll do my best.
#whumptober 2024#no official prompt lists used#teddy06 attempts a writing event#teddy06 writes#teddy06#teddy 06#teddy06writes#The outsiders x reader#Darry curtis x reader#dallas winston x reader#peaky blinders x reader#tommy shelby x reader#john shelby x reader#alfie solomons x reader#Criminal minds x reader#aaron hotchner x reader#umbrella academy x reader#diego hargreeves x reader#the hobbit x reader#fili x reader#kili x reader#lotr x reader#aragorn x reader#boromir x reader#top gun maverick x reader#radley rooster bradshaw x reader#robert 'bob' floyd x reader#wish me luck
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Interesting thing about the results so far:
Autistic people and allistic people seem to have very similar opinions. When one option goes up for autistics, the other similar option goes up for allistics.
At first it was looking like autistic people had stronger opinions, which I expected, but over time that hypothesis seems to have been disproved. Like, Dislike, and Don't Know/Care have almost exactly the same percentage of difference across autistics and allistics.
Conducting very important scientific research
#applying the scientific method to a fucking tumblr poll#yes I'm autistic with a sciencey special interest how could you tell?
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So recently I've been rewatching Danny Phantom, and I still retain that it's a pretty great show kid's super hero show, the fights, the characters, the (not so) witty banter, the whole schtick is good imo, but there's one thing I didn't notice when I was a young girl that I'm noticing now for the first time, and that's how hard they lean into the "Bumbling, Idiot Father" trope, and how utterly contradictory it is to the actual characterization they have for Jack Fenton.
Man constantly invents new, operational, and effective Anti-Ghost technology on the regular, but the show treats him like he can't add 2+2. Yes, Maddie is OBVIOUSLY the Smarter of the two, but I really wish they'd forgone the "Idiot Father" trope to go along with something like what they did in The Owl House, with Amity's dad.
Like, it doesn't have to be 1-to-1, there are other zany "Scientist turned Parent" archetypes that aren't Heavily-implied-to-be-Autistic-and-X-is-their-Special-Interest. You could lean more into Mad Scientist, or Special Talent, or something, but it's just really jarring for Jack to be treated like an incompetent, bumbling fool one scene, then the next seen he's surprising Maddie with a new, operational, and actually effective gadget she's never seen before (like the Fenton Spector Deflector) when in the scene before, he's shown to be a complete and utter idiot that, despite being a Ghost Obsessed Ghost Hunter, couldn't even tell the person who delivered his mail was a ghost.
I want to see a Jack Fenton who doesn't listen to social graces because Ghosts don't care about manners, so why should he? I wanna see a Jack Fenton who doesn't want to deal with Mr. Lancer because it takes time away from his inventing and/or investigation Ghosts, not because he's somehow a Scientist that's also an Anti-Intellectual. I want to see a Jack Fenton that cares about Danny's education, in-so-far as it pertains to Ghosts and Ghost Hunting Activities.
I WANT A JACK FENTON THAT FITS THE GHOST OBSESSED GHOST HUNTER THAT HE IS, WHILE ALSO ALIGNING WITH THE SCIENTIST HE IS!
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Sniper tf2 mentality
Today I will be talking about Sniper's personality because I often see people portraying him DRASTICALLY different abd I wanted to understand what's going on and why all of the interpretations are correct (in my opinion)
Let's name the most prominent thesises:
Sniper is shy and introverted.
Sniper is unhinged and bloodlusty and is annoyed by people.
Why do i think that these aren't exactly contradictory?
I think at this point it's safe to assume Sniper is autistic (I mean lol this is easier to prove than to disprove). As an autistic person myself, I can see why he could be perceived like that.
Sniper doesn't talk to people and mostly observes them and the situation. Very in tune with his profession. That, however, might be perceived as being shy or very introverted or both. People love talking and expect others to share information, yet Sniper never says half of the things he's thinking about.
But let me tell you, it's NOT because he's shy. If he was shy, it would show in his body language as being stiff and rigid. He's not. His body is pretty relaxed and takes enough space. Still crosses his arms, but in a "don't bother me" way, not a "please don't judge me" way.
He's just disinterested.
I relate to it a lot in real life! People at my job think I'm too shy to talk to them, but no, I just DON'T WANT TO. I'm not scared of any if you, there's just nothing to talk about. I don't know your business, you don't know mine, our interests don't collide. If I talked to you about my interests you wouldn't listen anyway. Small talk? Ew, are y kidding me?
However, I like to listen. I'm an extrovert personally (unexpected huh) so I love being around people, but it doesn't mean I have to takk to them. I'll just sponge the information they are babbling about so I know my community better. When I meet new group of people where everyone knows eachother but me, I'm not going to feel awkward, it's perfectly fine to observe.
Sniper seems to fit into this kind of behaviour too. So he's not shy in a social anxiety sense".
NOW LET'S TALK ABOUT THE BLOODLUST!!
Yeah you all know his in-game voicelines. You feel either horny or assaulted after he rolls these sadistic words on his tongue. Yes I said sadistic, are you gonna argue?
"We professionals don't give speeches we just take a shot" he says in the comics. OH YEAH? IS THAT WHY YOU HAVE THE MOST FUCKING VOICELINES OF ALL OF THEM??
Have you ever noticed how much attention he puts into saying how 'professional' he is? Like, yeah no shit, they all kinda are. But why, unlike other mercs, he insists on calling himself a professional with standards and morals, detached from emotions and feelings, so much???
There's literally no reason to be ashamed of being a killer and to admit that you enjoy killing people, you were hired to Mann Co. for that specifically!!!
My assumption: it's a personal disgust towards himself and his anger issues. I've said it before already and I will again.
His so called 'shadow side' that he suppresses so much. It loves to cause people pain, it loves releasing the inner anger, it is being feral and impulsive in nature. Sniper cannot let himself be like that for whatever reason. He's already built a clear picture of what he is in his head and he doesn't want to destroy that.
The only time he allows himself to be a monster is in the battle because it comes naturally. However, when it's not a situation of adrenaline rush, when people want to talk about his persona face to face, he starts to defend himself and bury his face under the lies he believes in.
And THIS is anxiety. To be scared to be truly perceived. Not like many people tried, but I assume he wouldn't like it.
Bro really thinks he doesn't have feelings lmaoooo imagine being so emotionally immature the only way to process your emotions is to shot a human dead.
So, is Sniper anxious? Yes. Is this social anxiety? No, he's not shy. Is he an unhinged murderer? Yes. Does he identify as one? No. It's really a little bit more complicated than the two thesises from the beginning.
He's a person. Obviously not mentally healthy. High dimensional. Can be potentially broken or healed in terms of a good character study.
I might be very wrong though and most of the assumptions are simply guessing by grasping the patterns, but usually when I analyze someone like thus, it turns out mostly right. But correct me if you feel like it.
#tf2#tf2 sniper#sniper tf2#just my rambling#I've been thinking about this mf a little bit too much#He is so NOT self aware#Can anyone see that????#His childhood traumas were never addressed he's just suppressed them#I wish he had more backstory#Bleh
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John and Yellow (Mirrors and Monsters)
Reblogs much appreciated 👍
1. Julio Cortázar, Los Reyes // 2. Malevolent - Part 23 // 3. Brené Brown, Daring Greatly // 4. Brutus - The Buttress // 5. Malevolent - Part 40 "The Order" II // 6. Minotaur Forgiving Knossos - Moonface // 7. Dawning Night by Joseph Feely / Malevolent - Part 1 / Malevolent Part 21 // 8. Joan Tierney, The Elektra Complex // 9. Malevolent - Part 24 // 10. The Bravery - Bad Sun // 11. Minotauro (Minotaur) by Jordi Garriga Mora (2007) // 12. Malevolent - Part 40 "The Order" II // 13. Margaret Atwood, Corpse Song // 14. Repeat Until Death - Novo Amor // 15. Malevolent - Part 40 "The Order" II // 16. The Calling - The Amazing Devil // 17. @autistic-evil-xisuma (sorry for the tag) // 18. Bad Bad Things - AJJ // 19. Marie Howe, The Affliction // 20. Malevolent - Part 40 "The Order" II // 21. Ragnarok III: Strange Meeting - The Mechanisms // 22. a conversation about identity - tea // 23. Malevolent - Part 40 "The Order" // 24. Requiem - Death Note Musical (English concept album) // 25. Richard Silken, The Long and the Short Of It (Annotated)
ARIADNE Why do you fear him? He is my brother. MINOS A monster has no siblings.
YELLOW: But it was me. I-In a way. ARTHUR (sighing): John. YELLOW: He was... different than me.
I want to experience your vulnerability but I don't want to be vulnerable Vulnerability is courage in you and inadequacy in me. I'm drawn to your vulnerability but repelled by mine.
But why do I lie awake each night thinking "Instead of you, it should be me"? Something wicked this way comes And as I set to face it, I'm unsure Should I embrace it, should I run? What motivates me? Hatred? Is it love?
ARTHUR (sighing, pityingly): Yellow. He never will. You are trapped with him. Forever. JOHN: Trapped?
I was born into this We were all born You were born like a pearl We were all born
YELLOW (in awe): There's a building, with lights on.
ENTITY (surprised): Well. ARTHUR: What? ENTITY: Nothing. I, I just... the city is so alive.
YELLOW: I... appreciate the life I saw. I... am at a loss for words.
ENTITY: I... the city... the life that exists on every street corner. It's... so different than the Dark World I thought I would forever call home.
I tip my head like a dog at the window. The outside world is so interesting, and I am not a part of it; I'm just witnessing.
JOHN: It's nothing, Arthur. I'm just telling you that every time you call him a monster, you're forgetting that I am the same.
I don't know what's wrong with us They just made us this way There's a hole in you and me That pulls us together
JOHN: If killing Larson kills Yellow... ARTHUR: Then you'll be fine! Stronger, maybe. JOHN: Or. I don't know if I can survive with only half a soul.
I exist in two places, here and where you are
Don't go, you're half of me now But I'm hardly stood proud
JOHN: I know you can't promise me. I know you aren't sure. But... Yellow is a piece of me. Can you imagine having to destroy a piece of yourself? Even if it's a reflection of yourself you may not like!
I look into the waters and see a face I don't recognise Who's this (Who are you)
people always talk about evil clones like oooh a dark mirror oohh what if you saw what a cruel person you were/are capable of becoming. and well yes but what if you were the evil clone. what if you looked in the mirror and what you saw was so bright it blinded you. what if you had to know exactly how good you could have been.
So I looked into your eyes And I saw a reflection Of a coward that you and I both hate very much
And he: (and this was almost unbearable) he saw me see him, and I saw him see me.
ARTHUR (quietly): But we all have to face our demons. Even if they're ourselves.
[Verse 2: THOR, LOKI, & Together] Where are you going? For vengeance For love
You're losing in a staring contest With whatever's in your mirror You are me and I am you But we're not one and I'm inferior
YELLOW: I... I... (Quieter.) Why you, John? What did you have to offer? Why does he care about... you?
Gone, who was right or wrong Who was weak or strong Nothing left to learn
The question for this issue was Do you have a human soul and can you prove it? And, of course, there was no definitive answer.
[Tumblr has deleted progress on this like three times now so I'm posting it now while it's done before it can fuck it up again!!! And thank you @ghostnotoast for being so lovely here is the weave]
#statement given [original post]#malevolent john#malevolent yellow#malevolent podcast#malevolent#malevolent spoilers#john doe malevolent#john malevolent#yellow malevolent#malevolent 40#malevolent 24#malevolent 23#malevolent 21#web weave#web weaving#webweaving#web weavings#web weaves
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pjo characters as quotes part 2
Will to Nico: "Here's your Benadryl, it appears Kayla has ripped up a piece of the flooring so if you go to the bathroom just be careful not to stub your toe"
Nico: "...okay"
Jason: "I am not a dog"
Leo: "Yes you are"
Piper: "i bet on loosing dogs"
Leo: "Is it possible to have an autistic dog?"
Will: "wtf"
Piper: "I'm sprinkling sexual tension on them like Parmesan cheese"
*Taylor swift music blasting while they're watching tv*
Hazel: "is Will able to turn down his music or"
Nico: "will turn down Taylor swift"
Will: "you're not a swiftie!!" *music immediately turns off*
*lightning strikes*
Rachel: "Looks like the gods are telling you no!!"
Hazel, in an extremely gleeful voice: "Do it again circus monkey!!"
Annabeth: "You know how to use the microwave, I'm not worried about your happiness"
Will: "*mockingly* "The boogeyman's gonna get you" *normal voice* I will kiss the boogyman. On the mouth."
Nico: "what"
Piper: "greys anatomy is one piece for white people"
Leo: "I am a fricking car"
Jason: "cars can't speak"
Pipers: "he's kinda proof that they can"
Hazel: "what's thunder thighs? Does it strike lightning"
Jason: "I'm sorry since when was I a twink"
Piper: "since your birth"
Jason: "then what is Leo????"
Piper: "a double twink"
Random person: "turn to god"
Piper: "turn to Chappell Roan"
Will to Nico: "DO YOU NEED A LAMP? I CAN STAND IN THE CORNER OF THE ROOM SILENTLY PLEASE"
Will: "my parents chose normal daughter but something happened in the process and they got Hamilton son"
Nico: "I wanna be a bibically accurate angel when I grow up"
Leo: "you're a bibically accurate plastic bag"
Leo to Piper: "You poked me with your long fricking female nails"
Percy: "I'm a strong boy"
Annabeth: "if you're such a strong boy can you help me put away towels"
Percy: "I said I'm a strong boy not a smart boy"
Annabeth: "the gods are gonna strike you if you touch his stuff"
Nico *pointing at every character that has died in the series*: "DEAD DECEASED KILLED MURDERED"
Nico *pointing at Jason*: "CYBERPUNKED"
Hazel, just learning about Bluetooth speakers in cars: "i would be a bad driver bc I would be listening to music and swerve to the beat"
Percy to idk who:*pointing to a tv that says "predator"* "thats YOU!"
Leo: hi Frank!
Frank:...I wish I had a prosthetic leg so I could take it off and throw it at you
Leo: what 🧍♂️
(Note: I love their beef sm make them kiss now)
Will to Nico: "Time for sleep!! *pause* oh wait I forgot you can't sleep the city needs you!"
Annabeth: "Don't make enemies if you're allergic to peanut butter."
#will solace#nico di angelo#leo valdez#jason grace#piper mclean#hazel levesque#frank zhang#annabeth chase#percy jackson#percabeth#valgrace#valzhang#solangelo#trials of apollo#heros of olympus#rick riordan
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Hi ! Idk if im doing this right, its my first time sending a request…
Anyways, I loved ur autistic!reader x Oscar fic and i was just wondering if you could write more about them :)
I would love to read something about how she would interact with the other drivers / how they would interact with her!
If you don’t want to write that then you don’t have too! I love your writing and would love to read anything you post <3
Have a nice day, bye 😊
Grid Encounters
Oscar piastri x Autistic!reader
Genre: Fluff
Request: Yes, and with the amount of people who want to see Oscar and his Autistic partner, I will potentially make this a series:). Also, I'm still open for requests
Summary: Shenanigans on the grid take place when Oscar and his girlfriend are there
Warnings: idk I don't think there is
Notes: Trying a new format, let me know what y'all think!
Masterlist
It didn't take long for some of the drivers to catch on
Others were completely oblivious
Oscar and Lando both found it incredibly entertaining when she struggled to filter her thoughts
Her opinions and comments about things making them laugh hysterically
When someone told a joke she didn’t understand and gave them a blank stare, the reaction to them was funnier then the joke.
Oscar always swooped in to save her
Explaining what everyone found so funny in a way that made it all click for her
Max became close with her easily
She listened intently every time he started Maxsplaining or info-dumping
It was obvious to her when he was joking
He appreciates her laughing at his jokes
Charles is absolutely clueless
The two often staring blankly at the other
No thoughts, head empty
Until they figured out their shared interest in music
Then they wouldn’t shut up
Lando appreciates her tastes in food
Specifically the lack their of
Finally he could go out to eat with someone who understood him and his pickiness
Much to Oscar’s dismay
Daniel is very sweet with her
He tries his best not to shout in her ear and if he knows he’s going to be loud he’ll make sure to warn her
He gets defensive whenever someone gets insensitive
He’s always ready to tell someone off if they aren’t listening to her and what she’s saying she needs
Lewis was always wanting to know as much as possible
Learning to help make people aware of the hurtful stereotypes
It was refreshing to see and she openly answered any questions he asked
The reporter and journalists on the other hand, had yet to learn their lesson
It became a game among everyone who was regularly in the paddock
A game they called “which journalist would be getting a blunt answer today”
They always wanted to know why she did the the things she did
In which they would either receive a blunt and unfiltered answer
Or a sarcastic remark
“Is this the new style?”
“Sure. But I just find it comfy.”
“Do you ever get annoyed by things around the paddock?”
“That’s a stupid question. Don’t you have a degree for this stuff?”
“How do you and Oscar celebrate?”
“We party really hard. Drink a lot… of water. Lay on the floor. I’m always exhausted after.”
Speaking of the floor
She had a habit of always being on it
She determined that some floors were better then others
Oscar loved to indulge in her experiments
Rating every floor she was willing to lay on
They once were judging to tarmac on the circuit
Other drivers were doing track walks
Eventually they joined in
The journalists were confused at why half the grid was laying in the ground determining if they could sleep on it
It was a nice change, being around people who didn’t label her and accepted all of her quirks
Oscar was glad she felt at home around the paddock
He loves her for who she is
So seeing her smile about her environment and being accepted into his grid family made him smile too
#x reader#fanficion#f1 fic#formula one#max verstappen#formula 1#racing#lando norris#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri x y/n#oscar piastri x you#oscar is baby#oscar piastri#fluff#mclaren racing#mclaren#mclaren formula 1#Charles Leclerc#daniel ricciardo#autism#autistic reader#formula racing#charles leclerc x reader#lando norris x reader#max verstappen x reader#autistic#redbull racing#Oscar#piastri#op81
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anyways as i mentioned earlier here is my absolutely nuts 'analysis' of Boboiboy having autism, and how each of the seven elementals kinda showcase a heightened version of an autism symptom-
so we're gonna go down in order (of manifestation for the elements)-
Boboiboy himself- he's just got the vibe, y'know? But also; it's been established he had no friends prior to moving in with his grandfather, which, y'know, is quite strange for a "normal" kid his age. He also tends to look at the people around him to know how to react in certain social situations (usually the person he looks to is Gopal which. Isn't always the best choice). Also the strong sense of justice is obvious (including that he goes so far as to help villains as well). (Yes this can be an autism symptom).
Halilintar (Thunderstorm). hear me out. Halilintar manifested due to overstimulation. I mean obviously the phobia of balloons is a huge factor here- but being in distress due to loud sounds is exactly one of the things that causes overstimulation for autistic people (could contribute to why he has this fear in the first place). One of the ways people might react to overstimulation is by becoming irrationally angry. Basically what I'm saying is that Halilintar spends most of his time on the edge of a meltdown-
Taufan (Cyclone). autistic joy. listen LISTEN. it's DIFFERENT from other people's joy, okay? a lot of autistic people experience emotions very intensely, it can full out take over you. also as far as i remember (it's been a while) he was the only one who had such an intense reaction to the mood changing potion- sure, the other people who had it were locked in one emotion, but none of them went as wild as he did- because he felt it a lot more intensely.
Gempa (Earthquake). i will admit, i struggled for a moment with Gempa- but honestly i think it's because he is, in my opinion, the one who's the most similar to OG Boboiboy. other than the heightened need to protect, which likely includes the sense of justice, I think Gempa is the one who masks the most out of all the elements. This is also why he seems to be the most neutral element.
Blaze and Ice. I'm doing these two together, because technically, their origin points are from the same thing: Burnout. It's just two very different responses to it. On the one side, Blaze is trying to, ironically enough considering the name, prevent burnout, by relieving stress (by doing things in the middle of night while no-one is looking and there's no pressure of social interaction). When there is too much stress, he falls into an overstimulated state similar to Halilintar's. On the other side, Ice represents the more depressed side of burnout- aka what happens after you actually burn out. It's why he's tired all the time.
Duri (Thorn). Okay so technically Thorn first manifested in battle but we're ignoring that. His tier 1 manifestation, as we all know, was mainly most definitely because Boboiboy got a concussion- but! Here's the thing; I don't think the concussion is why Thorn acts the way he does (though it's probably a part of it). I think, Thorn is just unmasked. The others all mask on some level, but Thorn just, doesn't. He doesn't really care how others might perceive him if he does 'childish' things or says things that no-one else understands because they didn't make the same connections he did, and he certainly doesn't care that deadpan telling someone their outfit is terrible might hurt their feelings, it doesn't even occur to him. He doesn't mask at all.
Solar. Again, technically manifested during battle. However once again we are ignoring that. It was established that the manifest condition for Solar (as Light), was for the elemental master (Boboiboy) to "expand their knowledge", and "read more". And, well, I know Boboiboy specifically read a bunch of science and history books and stuff, but honestly I don't think it really would've mattered what he chose to use to expand his knowledge, because Solar's main autistic trait is special interest. Because Boboiboy mainly focused on science and stuff, that became Solar's special interest, hence why he rambles off about formulas and stuff, and why he likes doing experiments. He hyperfixates on that stuff.
now. i could do the fusions... but honestly i haven't thought about the fusions enough to draw conclusions, so we're sticking with this
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