#yes i know this post is for me alone

[invinciblerodent]

pardon my french but I just saw a post about how someone thinks Solas must be great at eating pussy, and it's in all honesty, and with all the kindness in my heart and all the understanding in the world that I say that, while I've read some things I've thought were profoundly, irredeemably incorrect..... in my whole life, I don't think I've ever agreed less with another human being on any singular statement.

girl, not only are we not on the same page, I think we're reading completely different books altogether.

[vaxxildamn]

finally…… the legendary Level 20 Scissor Gal-adin

[viehlei]

Happy 1 month and 11 days!!!!

[heartorbit]

so when's the wxs phantom of the opera set

[softhe4rted]

on loneliness jenny slate / japanese breakfast, posing for cars / corinne von lebusa, big glow / dadushin / alejandra pizarnik, tr. me / fka twings, home with you / avocado_ibuprofen / fiona apple, left alone / anne carson, “the anthropology of water”, plainwater / kiki smith, free fall / alejandra pizarnik, diaries

[rox-of-iu]

one more batch of doodles from my PIDW fic because i finally finished it recently so of course silly doodles were a must.

also these are silly but the overall tone of the fic is more melancholic btw but i cant help drawing funny little guys you know me

[astralzeraphias]

maybe i came too early, maybe i came too late

i’m waiting in the shadows of the scaffolds of the old cafés where you told me to wait

[sesamestreep]

in Starfleet, you call your first officer your XO because you’re supposed to give them hugs and kisses. that’s in the rules.

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

[caeslxys]

I’ve mentioned this elsewhere but it feels relevant again in light of the most recent episode. Something that’s really fascinating to me about Orym’s grief in comparison to the rest of the hells’ grief is that his is the youngest/most fresh and because of that tends to be the most volatile when it is triggered (aside from FCG, who was two and obviously The Most volatile when triggered.)

As in: prior to the attack on Zephrah, Orym was leading a normal, happy, casual life! with family who loved him and still do! Grief was something that was inflicted upon him via Ludinus’ machinations, whereas with characters like Imogen or Ashton, grief has been the background tapestry of their entire lives. And I think that shows in how the rest of them are largely able to, if not see past completely (Imogen/Laudna/Chetney) then at least temper/direct their vitriol or grief (Ashton/Fearne/Chetney again) to where it is most effective. (There is a glaring reason, for example, that Imogen scolded Orym for the way he reacted to Liliana and not Ashton. Because Ashton’s anger was directed in a way that was ultimately protective of Imogen—most effective—and Orym’s was founded solely in his personal grief.)

He wants Imogen to have her mom and he wants Lilliana to be salvageable for Imogen because he loves Imogen. But his love for the people in his present actively and consistently tend to conflict with the love he has for the people in his past. They are in a constant battle and Orym—he cannot fathom losing either of them.

(Or, to that point, recognize that allowing empathy to take root in him for the enemy isn't losing one of them.)

It is deeply poignant, then, that Orym’s grief is symbolized by both a sword and shield. It is something he wields as a blade when he feels his philosophy being threatened by certain conversational threads (as he believes it is one of the only things he has left of Will and Derrig, and is therefore desperately clinging onto with both bloody hands even if it makes him, occasionally, a hypocrite), but also something he can use in defense of the people he presently loves—if that provocative, blade-grief side of him does not push them—or himself—away first.

(it won’t—he is as loved by the hells as he loves them. he just needs to—as laudna so beautifully said—say and hear it more often.)

[xxplastic-cubexx]

so like do you think they made the plastic wheelchair ALONGSIDE the plastic prison as a Just In Case situation, only after they realized charles was going to be a frequent visitor, or both as in because they knew charles was going to be the only person visiting him during planning they decided to make him a chair ahead of time

[kapsloc7]

turning a little meow meow into a little meow meow? hell yes.

anyways i remember really liking monster falls when i first got into the gravity falls fandom, and now that i am revisiting it i wanted to draw a little ford design ^^

[marimomo]

all the people comparing having a period to being a werewolf are so correct. yes i feel like ripping off my skin and emerging a blood soaked beast. yes i would like to run through the cool woods and look up at the moon. YES i want to bite something.

[cxskisser]

euphoria

3-sentence fic promptfill for ficwip on bluesky!!!!

The feeling stays with him as Cheng Xiaoshi stitches himself back into his body and into this part of the timeline, leaving him beaming and starry-eyed.

“Is that really how you see me, Lu Guang?” he breathes, leaning forward, enchanted with the way his partner’s blush spreads to the tip of his ears and the lingering memory of his partner’s heart beating in his ears at the mere sight of him, grasping Lu Guang’s wrist and feeling his pulse stutter beneath his fingertips, and Cheng Xiaoshi finds it hard, for a moment, to distinguish the lines between them — their love feels so similar, like souls aligned in tandem.

But the sparks that arise in his chest when Lu Guang murmurs, “Idiot,” and pulls Cheng Xiaoshi in for a kiss, the butterflies that take flight in his stomach when Lu Guang intertwines their fingers like he’s holding something precious in his grasp… that’s gotta be all him, right?

[cherryberg]

ok heres a real quastion why do you find your current blorbos so compelling. can u tell me abt their themes. would u get along with them in real lifes

my bones crunching teeth. my gripping hand on your shoulder, drawing blood.

ned flanders .. where to fucking start .. in the shortest way possible, that is

well, quickly. me? getting along with ned flanders? In Real Life? hell no! simply by virtue of me being the person i am. perhaps the band Dr. Colossus put it one way when they said “Stupid Sexy Flanders / Republican at best / Politically to the right / Dexterity to the left” (haloes .. my Dr. Colossus mention) but who’s to say how accurate that is now. i too am lefthanded you know. and we all saw him kiss fat tony. and he missed him too

anyway, simple put. i think ned flanders is like. a deep character - thanks in part to his religiousness. now you can throw your hands up about like his, well, flanderisation - from the homer simpson perfect neighbour foil to unbearably devout christian - but it does effect multiple aspects of his life in really interesting ways

so you’re telling me this man hates his beatnik parents? (Hurricane Neddy) what, did he cling to religion as a way to other himself from them? carelessly raised by them without discipline? repressing his anger for years? and how does that reflect upon his own kids, brought up in a strict christian household. his own kids he’ll be overprotective of because he can’t afford to lose them like he lost their mother (Bart Has Two Mommies), but who are still harshly scorned and punished when their faith in christ waivers? (Todd, Todd, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me?)

and what if when he doubts? when god takes both of his wives? (Alone Again, Natura-Diddly, O C’mon All Ye Faithful) his wives who he loved and will continue to grieve for? (I’m Goin’ to Praiseland, Diary Queen) and what of his second wife, huh? fourth grade teacher krabappel? how he learns to lower his religious guards for her? (Ned ‘n Edna’s Blend Agenda) how happy they were, however brief, with these compromises they made for each other? (The Man Who Grew Too Much) and krabappel’s relationship with rod and todd, did she have an effect on them? is it her influence whenever they speak out? (Bull-E) then again, we all know how impressionable those two are on a whim .. (Bart the Lover) and, goodness fucking gracious, so on and so forth. and they replaced his wives with a dog

sighs .. i can admit he can get Dead Wife Guy with it sometimes but i do think flanders is like .. a bit of a tragic man? i dunno, that “And I did something I hadn’t done in, I don’t know how long. God help me, I smiled.” in The Many Saints of Springfield lives sorrowfully in my brain. dude, after losing so much - his wives, his business he went bankrupt for (When Flanders Failed), his teaching job (Left Behind). like .. man. i dunno

i think it’s a little hard to watch a flanders-centric episode without wondering what it means for ned and his family on a deeper level, even for an episode as innocuous as Fland Canyon (what do you mean todd has night terrors that maude held him through? and that it’s todd’s nightmare of forgetting maude’s face that made him stop believing in christ?)

and, hey. if you’re really crazy enough, you could squint and make out some sort of aquatic sea creature motif with the Jellyfish Festival and song in A Star Is Born Again and his profound emotional processing in faith down in the hadal zone in O C’mon All Ye Faithful

regardless, all this to say. yeah .. i may be a bit of a nedhead :]

.

& btw .. he pulls, like, constantly. did you know this? like, constantly

[toddtakefive]

thinking about todd and his resolve toward… not quite isolation, but being alone in a room full of people again. he goes along to the study room to sit on his own and do his homework, he sits at the poets table and follows along with what’s being said while keeping quiet, he goes to the meetings at all but doesn’t necessarily contribute (in fact, if you watch him when cameron is telling the story ‘from camp in sixth grade’, you can see that he recognizes it before any of the other poets but doesn’t voice it until they all have). he’s not alone, necessarily, if you want to get technical about it, he’s just lonely, and he’s generally okay with that. he doesn’t have friends and that’s fine, he doesn’t participate in class and that’s fine, he doesn’t have a relationship with his family and that’s fine—he could live without any real connection and he’d have been, more or less, fine.

the thing about when he says “i can take care of myself just fine!” is that he isn’t really wrong, you can infer that he’s been doing it his entire life anyway, it’s that ‘taking care of yourself’ isn’t the same thing as really living or being happy. todd’s an introvert, certainly, and even as he gets closer to the group he defaults to sitting quietly in the background, but he’s also denying himself community out of fear not introversion. todd isn’t friendless because he’s an introvert, although that definitely plays a part, he’s friendless because he pushes anyone that might want his company away. if anyone has every wanted for his attention in the first place. (neil’s unwavering interest in him is unique (even when it comes to the rest of the poets, who are fine with todd coming along and joining the group, but aren’t really hellbent on him being there in the beginning) and his refusal to accept it is a direct result of being so lonely growing up.)

there’s obviously something to be said about the implications of his parents neglect, and the more than likely fact that he grew up friendless, and how those both play a part in in him being so skilled at dodging social interaction/being so avoidant of it, but by the time we see him in the movie he’s all but accepted his fate as being alone his entire life. he’s already accepted being the family disappointment, and he’s already accepted he’ll never amount to anything, and he obviously doesn’t like it, but he’d have managed living with that knowledge without the confirmation that it was all wrong. would he have been miserable? almost certainly. but he’d have managed. he’d done it for that long already, anyhow.