#y’all I am DEEPLY pleased with how this came out

[kindnessinsilver]

The Sea Upon the Land - inspired by the Adam Binder series by David R. Slayton

[xomakara]

Breathing

(re-posting from my old account seulrinnie-rinrin/xomakara-secondary)

SUMMARY | You were betrayed by your betrothed and left for dead. You’re rescued by a healer named Yeosang, who nurses you back to health. As you recover, you share your past with Yeosang and express your desire to live a quiet life, away from the rumors and hatred you faced. PAIRING | Yeosang x Reader GENRE/CONTENT | healer!Yeosang, noble!Reader, non-idol au, fantasy, romance, slight angst, slight fluff, smut, consensual, vaginal sex (wrap it up y’all!), oral sex, gentle lovemaking WARNINGS | Its a fantasy setting so…yeah, implied violence, betrayal, injuries/wounds, RATING | Mature, Explicit, 18+, NSFW, MDNI LENGTH | 7,050 words TAGLIST | -- NETWORKS | AUTHOR’S NOTE | This took me a bit to write and I finally finished it! I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I wrote it! Please reblog, comment and like~ Much love!

You couldn’t have known that it would have come down to this.

Couldn’t have known this would have been the last breath you would have taken.

He knew better than anyone else how much you loved him and even though you begged for a chance to be a family, you didn’t even get that one chance.

You were just discarded like the rubbish you were, never being able to find happiness or peace again. It all happened so quickly; there was no way you could stop what had just occurred.

All you wanted was to feel safe and protected; all you ever wanted was love, happiness, and companionship.

He gave you that love and happiness once upon a time.

But then that woman who was like a ray of sunshine swept him off his feet and took him away from you. He changed. He gave her everything and forgot about you. The rumors that you were evil and vindictive grew and flourished because of how you treated that woman. They said you stole him from her even though that was far from the truth.

The stories they told made him want to leave you and finally it did happen, just not in the way you imagined. Now he’s gone and you’re alone.

No more fighting.

No more tears.

Nothing but emptiness.

He is now free from your grasp as his guards drove a sword through your chest.

There is nothing left for you now except for pain and grief.

As you laid on the warm, grassy field looking at his fleeting back as he walked away with that woman at his side, you couldn’t help but take one last breath before darkness consumed you. Your heart stopped beating; your soul died in that moment when he gave up on you, right in front of your very eyes.

You woke with a start, breath heavy as you clutched at your painful chest where the guards’ sword pierced through it during your final moments of life.

You weren’t dead?

You looked around the room and noticed the bare furniture and bright white walls; the smell of death wasn’t present.

It was empty except for you. There was no prince by your side, no other guards and fair ladies, no one…

It was just you and this huge bed. You suddenly felt cold, not only from the icy temperature outside but also from the fact that your whole body hurt.

“You’re awake?” You heard a voice called out. You looked over to see a man standing near the door holding a bowl of something. “How do you feel?”

“Where am I?” You managed to choke out between deep breaths. The man came closer to the bed and kneeled down next to you, sitting the bowl on the nightstand that was next to the bed. “And who are you?”

“My name is Kang Yeosang.” The man smiled, putting a hand on your shoulder. You instinctively shied away. “Here, have some soup. It has medicinal herbs in it. Hopefully it will help ease the pain you’re feeling.”

“Thank you,” You took the bowl gingerly, cautiously as you carefully spooned the contents into your mouth.

Yeosang watched you for a bit, giving you a slight nod. “I know you have plenty of questions. I’m sure you’re wondering how you ended up here.” He sighed deeply. “I don’t know what exactly happened to you…but I found you bleeding out in the fields. You were barely breathing. You were barely alive. I brought you here, cleaned you up and nursed you back to health.”

“How long have I been here?” You asked after you swallowed the rest of the broth. You lifted yourself off the bed, using Yeosang’s hand as support.

"Only a few days.” He answered solemnly. “That wound on your back looks infected. We can treat it if you want.”

“Okay,” You nodded. He pulled up a chair next to the bed and sat next to you, giving you a worried look.

“Can I ask what happened to you?” Yeosang asked, his fingers untying the thick ribbons that tied the back of the shirt you were in. You closed your eyes as he peeled it open, exposing the injury in your back. “What happened when you were left out in the fields to die?”

“The man I thought I loved betrayed me for another woman. The rumors were that I stole him from that woman. That I was evil and vindictive.” You sobbed quietly as Yeosang tried to soothe your wounds. “People hated me for loving someone who didn’t love me back. I tried talking to them to come to an understanding during the imperial hunt…but I guess I was the one hunted instead.”

Yeosang gently dabbed the wound, helping you sit upright against the headboard as he began to bandage the cloth around your chest. You winced from the sharp pain. "They wouldn’t listen to you?”

“No,” You shook your head. “None of them cared. They just accused me of horrible things and said terrible things about me. They made my life hell and there was nothing I could do to stop it. To everyone, I’m just a villain undeserving of love and happiness. So I lost hope in trying to get people to accept me for who I really am. All I ever wanted was to belong somewhere, to be accepted by others.”

“Oh…” Yeosang furrowed his brows as he tightened the last knot of the bandage. He grabbed the shirt and put it back on you, wrapping it tightly around your chest. “Do you want revenge?”

You shook your head vehemently. “I don’t care about the rumors anymore. What’s done is done. Nothing can change that now. I just want to live life quietly even if people think I’m dead. As long as I am happy, then that’s all that matters.”

Yeosang patted your hand softly. “We’ll talk more later. Right now you should try and get some sleep.” He stood up and started walking towards the door. “Sleep well.”

You laid back down in the bed and waited until you felt drowsiness take over your body.

Your fever spiked and you coughed violently, sending hot spittle flying across the room. You were sweating profusely, your skin burning under your touch as Yeosang sat by your side, wiping your face with a wet cloth.

“Please stay still,” Yeosang murmured soothingly as he wiped your forehead with another cloth. “This will make you feel better.”

You let out a soft groan as Yeosang touched your back. Your back still ached, especially from the wound that pierced your body. The wound from the guards hadn’t fully healed yet. You were scared to move too much lest the wound reopened again.

“Let me see.” Yeosang reached for the blanket, uncovering your torso. “Does it still hurt?”

“Yeah,” You frowned as you tried to sit up. “A lot.”

“It’ll heal soon,” Yeosang assured you as he used the clean cloth to wipe your sweat away. You sighed in relief as your head cooled down. “Just relax and let me tend to you. This might hurt a little.”

“Alright,” You nodded, closing your eyes as you felt his hands moving around your wounded chest. The first touch made you flinch, causing Yeosang to pause in his work. You exhaled loudly as you slowly lay back down, letting Yeosang continue tending to your wounds. He worked steadily, cleaning the wounds and applying the healing balm onto the wound.

“Everything alright?” Yeosang asked concernedly, his eyes focused on your chest as he continued his work.

“Mmm hmm,” You hummed in reply.

He finished treating the wound after what seemed like forever. He let out a sigh of relief before sitting back in his chair. “There, that should help with the pain.”

“Thanks,” You smiled weakly. “That really helped.”

“Are you hungry?” Yeosang asked. “The broth earlier wasn’t enough for you. Are you hungry for anything else?”

“I would kill for meat…” You muttered but shook your head when you saw his face. “I don’t really mean I’d kill anyone. I’ll shut up now. Sorry for saying that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he chuckled lightly. “Would you like some water? You haven’t drank any in a while.”

“Sure,” You smiled gratefully as Yeosang got up from his seat and filled a cup of water from the nearby basin. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He handed you a cup of water. “Drink it slowly. Let me know if you need anything else.”

“I will.” You promised as you sipped the cool water. It tasted like nothing compared to the wine you usually drank but it was nice and refreshing nonetheless.

After your glass was empty, Yeosang refilled it. “Now, how are you feeling?” He asked gently. “Better?”

“Yes.” You nodded, swallowing the remaining liquid in the cup. “Much better.”

“Good.” Yeosang smiled at you reassuringly. “I’m going to head out and procure some meat. Will you be okay here alone?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” You reassured him. “Go on ahead. I’m good.”

“Alright.” He stood up, taking his empty cup with him. “Have a good night, Y/N. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night, Yeosang.” You watched him leave before lying back down in bed. You set the cup of water aside and stared up at the ceiling, focusing your attention on counting the beams above you.

Your wound had healed considerably, although it was still tender to the touch. At least it didn’t hurt nearly as much as it did yesterday. The worst part was having to constantly deal with the constant headache that was plaguing your mind. Even though you were alone, you had never felt more alone than you did at this very moment. You wished you had someone by your side; someone you could lean on. A friend or family member. But sadly, none of those existed.

But Yeosang had taken such good care of you.

In the past few days that you’ve been in Yeosang’s care, you learned that he was a former guard in the imperial army before losing both his parents in a tragic accident. Because of his current situation, he decided to return to his home village to tend to his parent’s property and retired from the imperial army.

Yeosang became a healer to provide healing for the village and for coin. He has always enjoyed healing and saving people, being outdoors for herbs and being among nature. In fact, he was looking for medicinal herbs in the outskirts of his village when he found you on the verge of death in the field.

Yeosang was a kind man, a bit weird and eccentric at times but he had a good heart. After your injuries were treated, he stayed by your side, helping you recover. He told you that you needed to eat properly in order to regain your strength. So he provided you with the best food he could find, made you nutritious soups and prepared delicious meat meals for you. You knew you should be thankful for his kindness but all you could think about was how lonely you were right now.

Your loneliness gnawed at you day and night. You had been so used to receiving love once upon a time. Now that you no longer had that, your heart felt heavy. Lonely and hopeless.

You couldn’t sleep properly because of the constant migraine that kept banging against your skull, keeping you awake. If only there was something you could do about it…

Yeosang returned to the cottage right before the sun rose, bringing with him fresh meat and vegetables from his excursion. After placing the supplies inside the cottage, he grabbed a small jar of water and brought it to your bedside. You took the water gratefully as Yeosang walked towards the bed.

“How are you doing?” He asked, looking at you intently.

“I’m better,” You replied with a small smile.

“Good.” Yeosang stroked your hair softly. “Maybe tomorrow we can go fishing. Would you like that?”

“Sure,” You smiled. Fishing sounded like a great way to pass the day.

“Let’s take a look at your wound then. Just to make sure everything’s okay.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as you felt his fingers lifting the back of your shirt, exposing your wounded back. Yeosang placed his warm hand against your back as he inspected the wound. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” He nodded, moving his fingers away from your back to lift up the front of your shirt. “Anything.”

You blushed slightly as Yeosang looked down at your naked torso, eyeing every inch of it. “Do you ever feel lonely living here? All by yourself without anyone?”

Yeosang paused in his movements. His fingers still as he held onto the edge of your shirt. He blinked a few times, seemingly confused. “Why do you ask?”

“I…it just came to me.” You scratched the back of your head nervously. “Sorry, I must have asked a silly question.”

Yeosang’s expression softened. “Not a silly question at all. Do you feel lonely here?”

“A little,” You admitted sheepishly. “My injury makes me quite vulnerable and sometimes I wish I had someone with me.”

Yeosang closed his eyes and gave you a faint smile. “You know what, Y/N?” He whispered gently. “I’d gladly be your company.”

Yeosang’s words caught you off guard. For a split second, your heartbeat increased dramatically. Your breathing became shallow and ragged. It took a few moments before you managed to calm yourself down.

“What did you say?” You stammered, staring at Yeosang.

“Y/N, I’d gladly-”

“Are you sure?” You interrupted, suddenly feeling nervous. “You barely know me.”

“You said you wanted to live a happy, quiet life. And I know you want to forget about all those things that happened to you. I want to give you that.”

“Yeosang…” You grabbed hold of his arm and squeezed it tightly. “I…” You closed your eyes and sighed. “I…”

Yeosang placed his free hand on top of yours. “Y/N, it’s okay to not want to be lonely. I’m kinda lonely too with no friends and living in this cabin by myself.”

You nodded your head. “So you can relate.”

“I can definitely relate. My situation probably pales in comparison to yours but I can definitely relate to being lonely.” Yeosang gave you a small smile as he patted your hand. “Are you hungry?”

“Yes,” You breathed out. “Very.”

“Good.” Yeosang grabbed the tray of food and placed it on the table next to the bed. He sat down next to you and handed you the spoon. “Eat.”

You moved the blanket off of you and sat up, digging into the large meal with a ravenous appetite. It was the first time in a while that you felt full and content. All thanks to Yeosang.

As you ate, Yeosang watched you intently. He was lost in thought as he sipped on his own bowl of stew. You had grown quite fond of his presence in the cottage since he arrived. Without him, you felt completely alone.

“Do you want to talk about what happened to you?” Yeosang suddenly spoke up, breaking you out of your thoughts. “I mean I knew you talked about it a bit before but…is there more that you can get off your chest?”

“Uh…yeah,” You mumbled, pushing your empty bowl away. “I suppose it’s about time I did.”

“Okay.” Yeosang raised an eyebrow. “So tell me, Y/N.”

You glanced over at Yeosang before continuing. “Well you probably know that I’m a noble. But I’m a high ranking noble that was betrothed to a high ranking lord at a young age. Maybe I was delusional or something but I thought he loved me just as I loved him. We spent countless hours together talking about our future and dreaming about what it would be like once we got married and settled down. Our families have been friends for generations. Everything was perfect. Then one day, everything changed.”

You paused for a moment, collecting your thoughts before speaking again. “I found out that he picked up a stray orphan from his travels, brought her home and took her under his care. He fell in love with her and he stopped loving me. It was just like that. Completely unexpected. One minute, I’m flying high thinking about my happily ever after with someone I love, the next minute, I find myself tossed aside like trash. Devastated is not even the word to describe how I felt. All I could do was crawl inside a hole and cry.”

You rested your hand on top of your stomach. “It was terrible. It was embarrassing and painful. Everyone was calling me names, telling me I deserved it and worse. My family abandoned me, telling me that I was a disgrace. How I was stupid for letting him go. For ruining our reputation.”

You shook your head slowly. “I didn’t know what to do. I tried to fight for him but he wouldn’t listen. No one listened. They called me evil saying that I was stealing him from his true love. My whole world collapsed around me. And then the imperial hunt came around and well…here we are.”

Yeosang remained silent as he stared at you. He took your hand in his. “I’m sorry you had to experience that, Y/N.”

“Thanks.” You wiped away the tears forming in your eyes. “And thank you for finding me when you did. I’m still alive because of you. And I really appreciate that.”

Yeosang smiled softly. “You’re welcome.”

You cleared your throat. “The food is good.” You looked down at your plate. “Thank you.”

“No problem.” Yeosang smiled. “Do you want anything else?”

“I’m all good.” You shook your head. “Do you think we can head into the village later? I need some new clothes and I think a walk will be nice. It’ll help clear my head.“

Yeosang stood up and stretched his arms above his head. "That sounds like a great idea.”

When Yeosang walked out of the room, you gazed out of the window. From where you were sitting, you could see the fields and trees surrounding the cottage. There was something beautiful about it. Everything seemed peaceful. You hoped that soon, you’d be able to find peace in your life again. But for now, you were grateful that Yeosang was taking care of you.

A few hours later, you and Yeosang left the cottage and headed towards the village. A few villagers spotted you walking through town and they started whispering amongst themselves. As you approached them, one woman nudged another and pointed at you. The two women exchanged a glance and one of them ran off to tell their friends. Soon everyone in the square turned their heads towards you, curious about who you were.

“Yeosang! Did you find a wife?” A woman shouted. “Oh my, she’s so pretty!”

“You’re lucky to have Yeosang as a husband, girl!” Another woman yelled. “If only my husband was half as cute as him.”

You let out a small laugh as the people began gathering around you. A group of children surrounded you and begged you to play with them but Yeosang had to shoo them away due to your injury.

A crowd had formed outside the tavern and the owner poked his head out of the door, smiling. “There goes another lover coming to steal my man. Sorry everyone, it looks like Yeosang is finally off the market.”

“Saving a damsel in distress isn’t such a bad thing, after all.” Yeosang chuckled and leaned against the wooden post beside the door. Everyone laughed as he turned to look at you, a mischievous smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “Let’s go get you some new clothes and other things you might need. Don’t worry, I won’t leave your side. The villagers are pretty nosy.”

“I don’t mind it all.” You smiled back. “Everyone seems to really love you.”

Yeosang rubbed the back of his neck. “They’re a bit too obsessed with me.”

“I think it’s lovely.” You grinned. “But let me ask you a question.”

“Of course.”

“You’re not embarrassed that the villagers are calling me your wife? I mean we just met and we’ve known each other for less than a week. That’s not very normal.”

Yeosang shrugged. “I guess I just don’t mind.”

You tilted your head. “Huh?”

“I don’t really care what people think.” He replied. “As long as you’re happy, I’m happy.”

“Oh…” You felt your cheeks heat up slightly. “Thank you.”

Yeosang pulled open the doors to the tavern and stepped inside, motioning for you to follow him. He ordered a meal for both of you and set it on the counter as he waited for the cook to bring it out.

“You’re so kind to me, Yeosang.” You mumbled quietly, setting down your plate.

“Don’t mention it.” Yeosang gave you a reassuring smile. “It’s nothing.”

“Maybe not but it means a lot to me. Thank you.”

Yeosang waved his hands. “No need to thank me. Just take it easy, okay?”

“I will.” You flashed him a warm smile before resting your head against the wall behind you.

After lunch, you and Yeosang went to go buy items that you would need, explore the village for a bit and headed back home.

“Yeosang,” you muttered as you looked at the wild fields that stretched out ahead of you.

“Hmm?” Yeosang asked, looking over his shoulder at you.

“You know that high noble that I was betrothed to? It’s actually Crown Prince Mingi…” You let out a sigh. “He’s the man that I was supposed to marry. The man that betrayed me and left me out for dead.”

He didn’t say anything as he strolled by your side. A little ways away from you, there was a stream that flowed through the countryside. You had never seen anything more beautiful in your entire life. The grass was bright green and the sky was filled with the color of purple.

“I should be mad that he betrayed me like this…” You muttered as you closed your eyes and breathed in the air. “I should get revenge for the things he did to me but…maybe there’s no point. I mean, I survived. I was actually saved by a kind stranger and now I’m on my way to find my own happily ever after. What more could I possibly want?”

Yeosang stopped walking and turned to face you. “Y/N?”

You opened your eyes and turned to face him. He studied you for a moment before reaching out and caressing your cheek. “Everything happens for a reason, Y/N.” He said softly. “I don’t understand why things worked out the way they did but sometimes, there’s a bigger picture that we can’t see. Maybe your life with the crown prince wasn’t meant to be. Maybe it was meant to lead you here instead.”

Your heart skipped a beat as he gently brushed his thumb across your cheek. His fingers were soft and warm against your skin. You couldn’t remember feeling so safe and secure in a very long time.

“Wherever you end up, I hope you find what you’re looking for, Y/N.” He smiled. “Just don’t forget that I’m always here if you need me.”

“I won’t.” You mumbled. “I promise.”

“Good.” He wrapped his arm around your shoulders. “Now let’s go explore the countryside, shall we?”

Over the next few months, you enjoyed yourself immensely while exploring the country. Sometimes you would spend time with the people of the village, sometimes you would sit by the stream and admire the beauty of nature. You also made sure to heal properly. While it hurt like hell, the pain eventually faded away as you healed. The scars across your chest still remained but you decided not to focus on that. Instead, you focused on the things you were thankful for.

One night, while lying in bed, you started to think about everything that had happened to you over the last few months. About everything you went through and about the one person that helped you every step of the way. You sighed as you drifted off to sleep, wondering if he was thinking about you right now too.

Hours later, you heard footsteps approach your bedroom. A knock sounded at the door followed by a muffled voice.

“Y/N?” You heard a familiar male voice call out. “Are you awake?”

“Yes.” You answered.

A few moments passed before the door opened and Yeosang peeked inside, giving you a small smile.

“Hey.” He said softly.

“Hi.” You smiled back, stretching your arms above your head.

“How are you feeling?” He asked.

You rolled onto your side and faced him. “Much better.” You sighed. “I can’t believe how fast I got better.”

“That’s what healing herbs are for.” Yeosang nodded. “Sometimes, they work faster than we expect.”

“Yeah, maybe.” You shrugged. “Speaking of which, I thought I would repay you for helping me.”

“What do you mean?”

“Since you helped me recover so quickly, I wanted to give you something in return.” You reached out and placed your hand on his cheek. “These past few months with you have been the best of my life. Even though we haven’t known each other very long, you’ve already become such an important part of my life. I’ve never been so at peace and happy all these years. If I could, I would have never let you go.”

His eyes softened as he stared deeply into yours. “Y/N, I-”

“Don’t.” You interrupted. “Don’t say anything yet. Let me do this.”

You leaned forward and pressed your lips to his, gently kissing him. He froze for a moment before returning the kiss. When the kiss ended, you slowly sat up, a smile on your face.

“I wanted to do this because…” You took a deep breath. “Because I want to thank you. For being such a good person. And for saving me.”

“Don’t mention it.” Yeosang replied, reaching out and pulling you close to him.

As the weeks went by, you and Yeosang continued spending most of your days together. Some days you would sit by the stream, talking or drinking tea while others you would explore the land. On those days, you’d venture far away from the village and walk along the endless grasslands. Sometimes, you’d stop and pick flowers for him to give to the women of the village or make you a meal to show his appreciation. Other times, you’d rest under a tree and watch the sun rise. You spent almost every day with him and loved every second of it.

You knew that you were falling for him but you weren’t quite sure when it had happened. All you knew was that one day, it hit you and you knew that you had moved on from the crown prince, from your old life and had found someone that made you feel whole again. It was hard to describe what you felt for him. All you knew was that he made you happier than anyone else in the world and that he was the one you had been searching for.

Over the next few weeks, the two of you grew closer and closer. Each day, you became even more attached to each other. After a few weeks, you noticed the affection between the two of you growing stronger and stronger. The villagers still saw you as a married couple and never failed to tease you whenever they saw you together. But you didn’t mind it. In fact, you relished in their teasing. It was proof that you had finally found true happiness.

When winter came around, you celebrated the first snowfall together. With a grin on his face, Yeosang scooped up a handful of snow and flicked it at your face. The cold water stung your skin but you simply giggled and reached out, grabbing another handful of snow. This continued until the both of you were covered in snow and laughter. You threw your arms around him, hugging him tightly.

“This is going to be a wonderful winter.” You whispered, resting your chin on his shoulder.

“I agree.” He chuckled, placing his arm around your waist.

After a few minutes, you broke apart, grinning from ear to ear.

“We should go inside.” You said, brushing some of the snow off of your coat. “I’m getting cold.”

Yeosang grabbed your hand. “I know a good way to warm you up.”

Your heart began beating rapidly as he led you inside. Yeosang lit up the fireplace and threw several logs inside. Once the fire was burning well, he wrapped a blanket around you and pulled you close to him, sitting on the floor. You snuggled close to him, as he held you, slowly tracing his fingertips down your cheek, letting them linger on your lips.

“So…” He whispered. “What are your plans for the upcoming new year?”

You grinned mischievously. “I don’t really have any.”

“But, if you did have plans, what would they be?”

“Well…” You glanced up at him, chewing on your bottom lip. “They might involve you, I guess.”

“Oh?” Yeosang raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah…” You admitted shyly. “I mean, we’ve been spending so much time together and our feelings seem to be growing deeper everyday. So, I was just curious…”

He cocked his head to the side, studying you for a moment.

“If I kissed you right now, would you kiss me back?” He asked quietly.

You swallowed hard. Your cheeks burned brightly as you lowered your gaze.

“Y-yes.” You whispered.

A smile spread across his face as he reached out and cupped your cheek, gently rubbing his thumb across your skin.

“If I wanted to make love to you, would you allow me to?”

You inhaled sharply as his words washed over you. His eyes searched yours as he waited patiently for your answer. After a few moments, you lifted your head and met his gaze.

“But all my scars… My body is damaged…” You explained, slightly hesitantly.

“I don’t care.” He stated simply. “All that matters is the person behind them. They’re only physical blemishes, nothing more. They don’t define you.”

A lump formed in your throat as he gently traced his fingers along your jawline.

“Besides…” He added, bringing his hand to your lips. “If you’ll allow me to kiss you, I’d gladly kiss away every single scar.”

Your breath caught in your throat as he leaned in closer to you. Slowly, his lips pressed against yours, sending shivers throughout your entire body. It was gentle and tender but filled with such passion and heat. At the same time, his hands caressed your hair and back, making you melt against him. You closed your eyes as you basked in the warmth of his touch. You could feel his heartbeat steadily racing against your own as his tongue explored your mouth. Every brush sent tingles coursing through your veins. Every kiss seemed to last longer than the last. As the seconds ticked by, the both of you became lost in the moment. Time ceased to exist as you became completely consumed by the sensation of being in each other’s arms. Eventually, the two of you parted, gasping for air.

“Let me make love to you.” He whispered.

You gazed into his eyes, lust swirling within them. “Please.” You breathed. “Make love to me.”

Yeosang slowly got up and picked you up in his arms, cradling you against his chest. As he walked towards the bedroom, he lowered you down to the bed and carefully removed your boots. Before removing your clothes, he reached out and brushed a strand of hair out of your face.

“My beautiful Y/N.” He murmured, gazing down at you.

With a soft smile, he began untying your blouse, sliding it down your arms. You turned your head to look at him as he gently removed your top and slipped it over your shoulders. Next, he slowly undid the buttons on your skirt and slid it down your legs, letting it fall to the ground. He gently stroked your skin with his fingertips, his touch caressing the scar on your chest. He leaned down to kiss it before capturing your lips once more. Once he broke away, he stared deeply into your eyes, taking in your beauty.

You watched him intently as he slipped his shirt off and then unclasped his pants. As he lowered himself onto the bed, he captured your lips once more, holding you tightly against him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he ran his hands up and down your body. He kissed every inch of your body, slowly trailing kisses down your neck and chest. The sound of your heart pounding in your ears was music to his ears as he paid special attention to every little detail.

When he reached your breasts, his lips followed, kissing every inch of them before moving lower, causing goosebumps to form on your skin. He circled his tongue around your nipple before sucking it softly into his mouth. You moaned in pleasure, running your hands through his hair as he gave you pleasure like no other. When he started sucking on your other breast, your body arched up into him. A few minutes later, you broke apart, breathless and flushed.

“Yeosang…” You breathed. “Please.”

With a smirk on his face, he kissed his way down your stomach. When he reached your navel, he traced his finger along it, causing you to shiver.

“Your body is perfect.” He breathed. “Just how I imagined it to be.”

He trailed kisses further south, giving you a taste of things to come. When he reached your thighs, he ran his fingers up and down them before lifting your leg and placing it on his shoulder. You bit your lip as you watched him trace circles on your inner thigh. He then placed a trail of kisses down your inner thigh, giving you chills as he slowly inched closer to where you throbbed with need. He stopped suddenly and looked up at you with dark, lustful eyes.

“Do you trust me?” He asked.

With a trembling voice, you nodded your head. “Of course I do.”

“Good.” He breathed. “Because I plan on exploring every inch of this body tonight.”

His hand moved back up your thigh, moving closer to your core as his tongue glided up your center, licking every inch of your clit, causing you to moan loudly. The vibrations echoed through your body as his tongue continued its slow pace. His hands moved from your thighs to your hips, holding you firmly in place as his tongue teased and tantalized your sensitive flesh. You trembled uncontrollably as he increased the intensity of his kisses, increasing the speed of his movements. Soon, you couldn’t take it anymore and began thrashing your head back and forth on the pillow, moaning louder and louder with every thrust of his tongue.

“You taste amazing.” He whispered. “And your scent is intoxicating.”

As he continued to feast on your pussy, you felt yourself building up toward an orgasm. Sensation after sensation flowed through your body, intensifying your pleasure until you could barely breathe. Your breathing quickened as your body tensed and shook. You cried out as you came undone beneath him.

You lay there panting, trying to catch your breath as he continued to eat you out, enjoying the taste of your juices. You slowly opened your eyes and gazed at him with loving eyes.

“I can’t believe I’ve never experienced anything like this before.” You gasped.

Yeosang smiled widely as he took a deep breath. “Are you saying that I might be a better lover than the crown prince?”

“Shhh…let’s not talk about him.” You giggled. “I want to keep enjoying this feeling for as long as possible.”

With a devilish grin, he shifted positions and began lightly kissing his way up your body to the scar on your chest. “Does it still hurt?” He asked.

“No.” You answered. “Not anymore.”

He pulled back and gazed down at you, a questioning look on his face.

“Not when you’re touching me.” You replied, running your fingers through his hair. “It doesn’t hurt at all when you’re here.”

He chuckled as he gently kissed the scar on your chest. “Then maybe I should stay with you forever.”

Your heart skipped a beat at his words. It had been so long since anyone had made you feel loved. In the past, you didn’t even know if it was real or not. But Yeosang showed you that you were worthy of affection. He proved to you that it wasn’t only love that could heal a broken soul; that it was also true friendship and compassion. From the moment he saved you, you knew this man was meant to be in your life. The way he treated you, the way he cared for you, the way he respected you… You knew he was someone very special.

Yeosang kissed your scar one last time before capturing your lips in his. His lips were warm and gentle as they met yours. You ran your hands up and down his back, holding him tight against you as you surrendered to his touch. He enveloped your body in his strong arms, laying in between your legs as he continued to explore every inch of your body. With each kiss, his hands drifted lower, feeling every curve and fold of your skin. With every caress, he held back his excitement, wanting to make sure you enjoyed every second of this moment. Every ounce of his passion poured out as he laid claim to every part of you, leaving you spent and breathless.

“Can I…?” He murmured against your neck. “Can I finally be inside you? Make sweet love to you?”

“Yes.” You breathed. “Please.”

Slowly, he pushed his way inside you. You let out a moan as you gripped his back. Each stroke caused another rush of pleasure to spread through your body. Every movement caused you to shudder and shake, calling out his name over and over again. He kept a slow pace, careful to not hurt your body any further. Every movement caused a new wave of pleasure to wash over you, threatening to send you over the edge. He knew that your body still needed time to heal, and therefore, would wait patiently until you were ready for more.

After several minutes of gentle lovemaking, he lifted his head and gazed into your eyes. Your cheeks were flushed and covered in sweat, yet you still radiated an aura of pure beauty.

“This feels right, Y/N.” He said. “I’m glad I found you.”

You smiled lovingly at him. “I’m glad you found me too.”

For the first time in years, you felt safe. For the first time in years, you felt truly loved. For the first time in years, you felt whole. You held onto him tightly as he continued to slowly thrust in you, savoring every last minute. This was your first time experiencing this type of intimacy and you wanted to remember every single detail.

Yeosang’s face lit up with delight as he felt you tighten around him. Both of you grew increasingly aroused as your bodies began pulsating with pleasure. You clenched your muscles tightly around him as you arched your back, begging for more.

“You sure?” Yeosang asked. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“It’s fine. Please, Yeosang.” You begged. “I need more of you. More of everything.”

His expression softened as he leaned down and kissed you passionately. At the same time, he slowly picked up his pace, thrusting harder and faster as your screams filled the room. He plunged deeper inside of you, filling you completely. Every inch of your being became alive, as your entire body quivered in ecstasy.

In response, he wrapped his arms around you, clutching you close to his body as he panted heavily, lost in the throes of passion. Every time he hit bottom, you clenched him tighter, crying out his name. Together, both of you shared your greatest moment together. Every ounce of happiness you had ever felt was released during this intense experience. And when the climax subsided, neither of you wanted to let go. You slowly began rocking back and forth with him, falling deeper and deeper under his spell. Eventually, he leaned down and captured your lips in a tender kiss, whispering in your ear.

“Thank you.” He breathed. “For staying alive. For making me fall in love with you.”

You gazed into his beautiful eyes as he gently rocked you against him. The love and warmth that radiated from his gaze overwhelmed you. “Thank you.” You whispered back. “For saving my life. For helping me see what true love really means. For letting me live and breathe once more.”

Yeosang tightened his embrace around you as you nuzzled your face against his chest. His strong arms held you securely as you closed your eyes, basking in the warmth of his embrace. You listened to his heartbeat as it slowly calmed, and as you did, your own heart began to beat slower and slower. It was as if you had become one person, one mind, one heart. As you drifted off to sleep, both of you fell asleep holding one another.

In his arms, you found peace, contentment, and most importantly…love.

[britany1997]

Fate Yields For No One

Chapter one

Sorry to make y’all wait so long! I hope this chapter is worth it:) (don’t worry y’all, the boys will make an appearance very soon😏) let me know if you want me to add you to this Taglist or to my main Taglist in the comments!

Reblog to support my writing💕

Poly Lost boys x Max’s daughter reader

Prologue

New York, 1986

“what if I told you that I could do more than heal you? What if I could restore your life and then some? Would you want that?”

“I’m not ready to die, I’m so scared. Please don’t let me die, not like this.”

“I am truly sorry that there isn’t enough time to do this the gentle way, I hope you can forgive me.”

Sharp fangs sinking into your neck always jostled you from your reoccurring nightmare. You sighed as you surveyed the sweat covered sheets surrounding you, running a hand through your hair as you fought to banish your fear.

After that awful night in the alley where Max has found you, you’d ran as far as you could, trading the west coast for the east. But no matter how fast you ran, you couldn’t escape your own mind.

Your life as a human was long gone, but the memories populated your nightmares. They reminded you that no matter how different you were now, how strong, you would always be that pitiful girl who’d almost died, alone and unloved.

Whatever you were now could never erase the fact that you used to be nothing to this world.

You slunk out of bed and sauntered to your balcony, taking in the breathtaking sight of New York City when night fell.

Your hands gripped the railing as your eyes scanned the bright lights, the racing cars, and the bustling crowds. You breathed in deeply, taking in your last view from the balcony before you had to flee your apartment and search for a new one, attached to a new sucker for you to use.

As much as you loathed it, your vampirism allowed you to take revenge on the cruel and wealthy in ways you’d never been able to before.

While other vampires went straight in for the kill, you preferred to play with your food. You didn’t just want to feed on random humans, you wanted the ones you chose to suffer.

You preyed on the titans of Wall Street, the trust fund babies, the old money bastards and all the other men who would have stepped over your corpse in the gutter.

You were beautiful and you knew it. It was never a struggle to ensnare them. You hung around at the fanciest restaurants in the upper east side, and the classiest bars in the financial district. Hunting was pointless, the men came to you.

You spent a few weeks stroking their egos, among other things, and they gave you anything you wanted. The money, the power, the influence they had became yours just as much as it was theirs.

They allowed you into their homes and their hearts. When you were sure that they trusted you, that they loved you, you dropped the mask and showed them who you really were, teeth and all.

Maybe you should feel bad for using them and draining them, and some part of you did feel a small pang of guilt every time the life drained from their terrified eyes.

But you had walked with them at night as they ignored the starving people that lined the streets of the city. They refused to offer even a cent of their “hard-earned” money.

When your eyes welled with tears at the downtrodden state of those around you, they wouldn’t dry your tears. Instead, the rich men would tell you that those stranded on street corners had earned their place in life.

“How will they learn?” they’d ask you. “We can’t just give people money,” they’d patronize you, “this is America! Anyone can pull themselves up by their bootstraps nowadays.”

They’d assure you that they helped them more by not sharing a minuscule amount of their vast wealth. The homeless were a plague on the city, they’d insist. Didn’t you want them to help themselves?

So the men you killed, their deaths didn’t bother you much.

You shivered as you replayed their screams over and over again in your head. They called you a murderer, a monster, and maybe you were.

But so were they. You’d killed over and over, but every person on a street-corner they’d all but spit on, every dollar they’d hoarded that could have saved your family all those years ago, they were murderers too, they were more monster then you could ever be.

You were pulled from your thoughts by a firm knocking at your door.

Your blood ran cold. You knew it’d been a risk to feed on those humans that society had deemed to be the elite and important. But you hadn’t realized your actions would catch up with you this quickly.

You didn’t want to slaughter a hoard of police officers, but you’d do what you had to to keep your freedom. You cautiously unlatched the door and pulled it open.

Though you’d expected to be met with the business end of many pistols, the sight before you was much, much worse.

Wrapped in a taupe suit with not a visible wrinkle, glasses perched on his nose, the vision of the man you’d met in the alley all those years ago stood before you, a frown etched onto his face.

You gasped, moving to slam the door on him, but before you could he wedged his foot in, holding the entrance open and pushing past you.

You hadn’t felt so small and weak since you were human. Max had a way of doing that to you.

“Hello daughter,” he uttered nonchalantly as his eyes took in the sight of your stolen apartment.

You clenched and unclenched your fists, struggling to keep your anger at bay. “You’re not my father,” you spit, “not even close. I had a father remember? Because of you I’ll never see him again.”

Max rolled his eyes, “foolish girl,” he stated, “when are you going to realize that this is the only eternity there is.”

He scoffed, “you are too old to be dwelling on fairytales of an afterlife anymore. Your family is gone, it’s been years, get over it.”

You fought back tears as he ridiculed the love for your family you still clung too. Your hand raised to slap him, but he caught it before you could.

“Ungrateful child,” he said through gritted teeth, “you embarrass me and you squander the gift you have been given.”

You snatched your hand from his grasp and rubbed your risk. “I never asked for this,” you reminded him, “you said you’d save my life, but I died in every way that matters, you lied.”

Max rolled his eyes once more, “I tire of your melodrama little girl. I’ve come to bring you home.”

It was your turn to scoff. “Home?” you laughed, humorlessly, “I have no home in California anymore. My home is here now.”

Max smirked, “which home?” he asked, “as I understand it you’ve become the little ‘black widow Robin Hood’ of the upper east side. You’ve had many many homes these past few years, but they’re not really yours, are they?” He raised an eyebrow.

You crossed your arms as your gaze fell. You hated that he was right.

“I’m not going with you,” you whispered.

He hummed, “you seem to be under the mistaken impression you have any choice in this matter.”

He placed his finger on your chin and tilted your head up, “I am your sire. You will obey me.” he commanded.

“I made you what you are, and I can destroy you just as easily.”

You cringed.

“You either come back with me, or you can return to the gutter,” his hand moved from your chin to wrap around your jaw, squeezing tightly, “but if you choose the gutter, I’ll ensure it is your final destination.”

You boiled with rage but you knew Max was right. He was older than you and much stronger. As your sire you were tired to him, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to fight his thrall.

He stole your mortality, your happiness, and he’d come back to steal your freedom too.

Yet you found yourself gathering your things to leave with him. You hated him, but god, you hated yourself too.

Max flicked the light in the apartment before grabbing your arm and leading you out the door.

He sighed, “I know you resent me now, but I’m only doing what’s best for you. I take care of my children, and I hope that in time you can learn to see me as your father.” he spoke in a rare moment of softness.

You took in his words silently, offering no reply, but sure of the fact that you would never see him as anything other than the man who’d doomed you to an eternity of emptiness and pain.

FYFN Taglist❤️:

(Some accounts it wouldn’t let me tag😭 idk what the deal is)

@6lostgirl6 @peachpixiesstuff @ghoulgeousimmaculate @bloodywickedvamp @sidefanficaccounttohidemyshame @paulxbathbomd @anna1306 @its-freaking-bats @dwaynesluscioushair @feardot-com @solobagginses @pixielostboy @ria-coolgirl @vampirefilmlover @flower-crowned-lady @misslavenderlady @lostboys1987girl @warrior-616 @consuming-karma @moonbeam1987 @softchonk @besas-stuff @people-are-strange-87 @simplyreading96 @simpingforthe80s @mad-is-sad @smut-religiously777 @welcome-to-the-hole @vxarak @itsyoboysparkel @billyhargrovedemoness1987 @faefairi3 @jamie-poopoo

[hopepaigeturner]

Hope's Review of S3 : Kanthony & Francesca

Note: These are my opinions, that does not make them right, nor am I posturing that they are the only opinion. Very up for discussion with y’all as long as it’s respectful.

Note: I do not stand for hate against any actors/actresses or writers. Please, please, do not send hate to them.

As I said in my past posts:

I loved moments, far more than the writing.

Kanthony:

And this couple is the personification of the above sentence.

I adored every single scene with Kanthony. Anthony my-wife Bridgerton stole my heart. The kiss during the dance. Announcing the baby. Competitive couple goals. My heart melted with how they looked at each other, how intimate they were with one another. Whenever they came on my screen I squealed.

However…I really didn’t rate their arc this season. Do we remember the interview where Simone talked about how this season we were going to get Kate settling into her role as Viscountess? Where did that go?

They bopped in and out without much coherency. I feel as if the writers wanted them for that one scene with Colin re: marital advice in the middle of the season but didn’t have a clear idea for what other scenes they could do. And I do think it was more than just Johnny and Simone’s schedules.

Yes, it was nice for them to take a little extended honeymoon for themselves to have a child when last season was so full of tension and sacrifice. And it is heart swooning that Anthony wants to have the baby in India—but two different excuses to get them off screen? Why not just the one? The key with Kanthony is that they both know they cannot fully shirk their responsibilities—nor if they’re being honest would the pair wish to—but their love story was about finding someone else to share the burdens with. Having them pop off to leave Benedict with it all not once, but twice, seems a bit of a disservice to their characters.

Francesca & John:

I LOVED John and Francesca’s storyline. I loved their courtship; I liked their chemistry and their interactions. The song he got rewritten for her? Swoon.

I liked that Francesca taught Violet some lessons in love, I thought this was one of the more interesting and meatier storylines. I like that Bridgerton is showing us how valid different types of romances are.

I liked that both had to go out of their comfort zones for their love, they needed to be bold. John in asking Francesca to dance at the wedding breakfast, and Francesca standing up to the Queen.

However…the ending got things a bit muddled, especially in the last episode. Francesca and other characters kept pushing the idea that her marriage was her ‘getting it over and done with’, or that her marriage was a way to “escape the family” or have time to find herself. Combined with her reaction at the wedding, it made me doubt Francesca’s intentions with the romance. Was it really because she loved him?

A mina contribution around this is that I still don’t know who Francesca is. Unlike other characters, Francesca has not been built up for the last two seasons, tf it was so important that from the get-go we got a clear idea of Francesca’s motivations, her views, her personality. And we got some of it, but I felt like it got a bit muddled because they immediately got her together with John. I would have loved this season to be a season of us finding out who Francesca is before she is linked with another person.

However, I'm not really peeved or worried about all of this. Whether Francesca is a lesbian, or whether her marriage with John is one that does not have much sexual desire—does not negate her deep love for him. It's just in the next season/s the writers need to show the deep love. I would also find it refreshing to have a couple that deeply love each other without the need for sex. Especially in our very sex-driven culture.

On the topic of Francesca and John…

Franchaela

I was gobsmacked when I saw Michaela come in. I literally paused the show and had to take a moment. Afterwards, (while it did take me a minute to put aside my love for Michael Stirling and sigh a little mournfully for some of the storylines we won’t see), my brain then did a 180 and has now gone down a rabbit hole around this new dynamic/story. I just hope that the writers can do it justice.

Also, I think I saw a comment in an interview about how its really cool they’re going to show a ‘happy queer love story’ on Bridgerton. And all I was thinking is how When He Was Wicked is the most angstiest book in the entire season--but at least we’ll still get a HEA.

Also, I know a lot of people are annoyed about Francesca’s reaction to Michaela, and I think that can be taken multiple ways. I saw a post (apologies I can’t find it otherwise I would credit you) that pointed out that for non-book readers, they would have no idea the purpose/significance of Michaela without some obvious moment like we saw. They might have just assumed she would be a friend for Eloise. Personally, at the first watching I was a little disappointed because it piled on top of other moments in the episode that seemed to undermine Francesca and John’s relationship. But again, it will be very easy for the writers to show the love between John and Francesca in future season so I’m not too worried about this.

But do you know what we do get now…

We get the BPSC=, otherwise known as the Bridgerton Pining Society. Est. 1817.

President: Sophie Beckett.

Vic President: Michaela Stirling.

Honorary member: Benedict Bridgerton

I mean, did you see how fast Michaela's smile dropped upon learning that Francesca is a Kilmartin?

[neteyamoure]

[WARNING: ATWOW SPOILERS] My Take On Neteyam Sully’s Character

Hey y’all can we discuss something? Am I the only one who’s favorite character in Avatar 2: The Way of Water is Neteyam?

The first time I watched the movie in theaters I was hyper fixated on Loak (obviously, just as JC wanted). At first, Loak was my favorite character because I understood his internal conflict and I mean, he was the Sully kid that was very relatable and stood out to me the most.

The second time I watched it, I decided to pay more attention to the other details and characters in the movie and that was when I actually started paying more attention to Neteyam. After my second viewing, I would have to say that Neteyam became my favorite character in ATWOW. I know a lot of people question why many people like Neteyam since "he didn't get enough dialogue or screen time" or he "wasn't as developed as the other characters." Well, I don't see it that way. Yes, his character is all about being the responsible older brother who is the perfect soldier and always takes care of his siblings, but if you really stop and pay attention to him, he's actually a deep and well-developed character. He does have more of a "subtle characterization" compared to his other siblings though, but that doesn't make him any less of a good, fleshed out, and deeply moving character. After paying more attention to his dialogue, mannerisms, and actions, I came to love and relate to his character even more.

Neteyam is the first born child. His parents are the great warrior Toruk Makto and the great huntress Neytiri who led the Omaticaya clan against the sky people. Of course, he's going to want to live up to the clan and his parents' expectations. The pressure to be a great future leader and warrior like his father was already put onto him at a very young age. He was constantly training alongside his father because it was expected that he would be the next Olo'eyktan and on top of that, he had 3 trouble-maker younger siblings that he needed to look out for and to take care of. Neteyam literally had to grow up and mature early compared to the rest of his siblings. That's why we don't see him interact and play with his other siblings that much in the movie because he is the older sibling and has to put his duties first before fun. He worked so hard to work his way up within the clan and to please his parents. He worked so hard to then have it all stripped away when his family had to flee to take refuge within the Metkayina clan.

If you pay close attention to Neteyam in the scene where the Sully family greets the Metkayina clan for the first time, you'll see Neteyam's Omaticaya cummerband around his waist (an indication that he's completed his coming of age ceremony and is now considered an adult within the Omaticaya clan). After they assimilate within the Metkayina, we don't see him with his cummerband on anymore because he is no longer associated with the Omaticaya. In order to respect the Metkayina's traditions and ways, he was forced to abandon his Omaticaya cummerband.

If you pay close attention to his songcord beads (Neteyam's necklace/trinket Neytiri was praying with at the beginning and at the end of the movie), you can see that the first half of his beads looked completely different from the second half. That is because the first half was when Neteyam was with the Omaticaya and the second half was when he was with the Metkayina. His beads turned into shells - indicating the big transition to Metkayina life. Neteyam completed both his Iknimaya and Dream Hunt ceremonies within the Omaticaya and if you really think about it, imagine the sorrow he felt when he had to let go of all his past achievements within the Omaticaya clan and start anew with the Metkayina traditions and ways.

In the scene where Loak runs off to warn Payakan about the Tulkun hunters, he tells Neteyam that Payakan is his brother and not him. You can see how this statement hurts Neteyam as he loves his brother and always has his back. Neteyam always takes the blame for Loak because he loves his brother that much. I don't know if anyone noticed or felt the same way about this, but when I saw Neteyam's face at that moment, I swear he was frustrated and done with being called "the perfect soldier" by Loak. This is what his whole family and clan always thought of him. The pain in his face as Loak says this, you can tell that Neteyam didn't want to be viewed as "perfect" anymore. It really looked like it bothered him and he was so done with people viewing him as "perfect."

Throughout the movie, we see Neteyam always saving his siblings' asses. He also saves Neytiri from being shot at the beginning of the movie. He literally takes the bullet for Loak at the end of the movie. He was always there. He always made sure that everyone around him was happy and comfortable. He always made sure that his family was safe. He was always caring. He was always there to support. He always did what was told of him. He never complained. He always put his family's needs and wants before his. He never said what he really wanted to say.....until the very end when he knew he was dying - "I want to go home." He finally revealed his true thoughts and feelings to his family. This was the first time throughout the whole movie where we hear what he really wants. He held it in, stayed strong, so that his parents and the rest of his siblings wouldn't worry. He remained positive even though it was eating him out from the inside.

When I saw Neteyam interact with his siblings throughout the movie, he really felt like an adult compared to the rest of them. However, when we see Jake holding him as he's dying, it really hit me that he was still a 15 year old boy (he isn't even that far in age from Loak and Kiri). A mere child who had to carry this heavy weight and responsibility on his shoulders for so long. He was still too young to be holding all that pressure. The pressure to be a good future leader, a mighty soldier, a good and responsible older brother, a positive light and rock for his siblings, and a protector to all. He really cared for his family deeply. He really did put his family's needs and wants before his own. I know a lot of people who are the eldest sibling can relate to his character.

After realizing all of this, this was when Neteyam became my favorite character in ATWOW and made his death even more tragic. After rewatching and paying really close attention to his character, he had so much more depth, personality, meaning, and emotion than what people thought of him to be. He was more than just "the responsible perfect older brother and soldier that didn't have a deep story arc compared to his siblings."

And what gets me the most is that, towards the end when he is dying and says to his family that he wants to go home, they didn't even take him home. His funeral was held within the Metkayina clan and his body was laid to rest in the ocean, not in the forest. I understand that bringing his body back to the Omaticaya would have been too dangerous and risky, but damn.... that's all he really wanted. Literally, that was his dying wish. However, it does give me comfort that at least, he returned home spiritually as we see him in the forest when Jake and Neytiri visit his spirit through the Metkayina spirit tree (cause you know, every living thing on Pandora is connected through Eywa and it technically doesn't really matter where a person is laid to rest as you can access their memories through any spirit tree).

Neteyam was always saving everyone, but no one was there to save him. He really deserved better.

So for those of you who wonder why some people adore Neteyam so much, this would be my answer.

[cabinofimagines]

While it lasts

I feel like I should disclaim, just like the Anubis fic, that as long as y’all don’t specify that it is Walt and Anubis I will treat them as being separate. Which, once again, has happened. 

Also, first Walt fic! I think I might be getting the feel for him but I dunno. 

Pairing: Walt Stone x gn!reader Request:  Can you write a fluffy Walt Stone [Kane Chronicles] x Reader oneshot, where they celebrate Valentine's Day together? Word count: 1.1k Warnings: mentions of Walt’s curse, the implication of a tragedy- 

-Asnyox

It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks about Valentine’s Day, this year it didn’t even matter what your opinion was on the day. In light of your relationship, and the tied temporality to it, you were amendment on celebrating this day. You would have liked to be able to not think about Walt’s curse, but since he told you it was haunting you too. Perhaps you wouldn’t be able to fix it, maybe you would only have a set amount of time, but you refused to let the sorrows of this settle into your relationship. Which meant that even if Walt said he didn’t necessarily care about Valentine’s if you didn’t, you wanted to spend every minute of it with him.

You refused to let Valentine’s Day be one of your regrets if Walt passes. You refused to let the day in the year where you are supposed to love to pass unnoticed.

Which meant that you woke up next to your boyfriend, holding on to his waist as he, seemingly already awake, softly played with your fingers.

“Good morning, my charm.” Walt greeted you, his voice warm. “Morning, love.” You greeted him back, slowly lifting your head, “How are you feeling today?” you asked as you looked at your boyfriend lovingly. Walter hummed as he closed his eyes, breathing in deeply.

“Better than yesterday,” Walter opened his eyes, “I will manage whatever you have planned, I hope.” You sat up, glaring at your boyfriend.

“Walt Stone, if you’re in pain you do not have to do anything.” A smile graced your face as you continued, “Besides, as the amazing significant other I am, I have made plans that can be converted to low effort alternatives.” Walt sighed. “But I don’t want you to not have the Valentine’s Day of your dreams, (Y/n).” “Any Valentine’s Day with you is of my dreams, love.” You grinned, “So, inside or outside?”

“Inside then, please.” Walt sat up too and cupped your cheek, “I love you, oh gracious significant other of mine.”  He whispered before he kissed you slowly.

───────────

You knew of the pains Walt had to go through on a daily basis, so you always tried your best to accommodate him whenever you could. So, for todays date you had planned things that you could either do outside of the house, or inside. This was something that you both early on in the relationship came to understand. If you wanted dates, you had to be prepared to take it slow whenever Walt was not feeling well.

However, Walt sometimes felt guilty for taking away the ‘normal’ experiences of a dating live you could have. If you did not check on him verbally, he would refuse to tell you when he was in pain and when he should take it slow. Even if you tried to reassure him that it is fine, he would still wish he could take you out more, have you see the world and pretend that everything is normal, even if it would be for a day.

Yet, as you held his hand to guide him towards your date, eager to show him what you prepared the day before his thoughts stilled. Walt only registered his beating heart, the melody of your voice and how much love he felt for you. As you let him into a new room, looking forward, Walt only looked at you, a soft smile on his face and adoration in his eyes.

“Here you go! Don’t you think this looks great?” You asked, gesturing in front of you, before turning around to face your boyfriend. “It does,” Walt hummed, only having eyes for you.

“Let’s sit down!” Only as you moved Walt to sit on the pillows on the floor, did he take in the room. You had transformed your bedroom into a picnic place. There was a blanket right next to your bed on the floor, a basket in the middle. Above your heads, you had strung some fairy lights, and Walt noticed that you even got vases with different types of wildflowers scattered around the room.  

“It is our own private little paradise,” you smiled as you sat down next to him, leaning against his shoulder carefully, “Now please, go ahead and start eating, after this we can sit on my bed and” you did quotation marks with your fingers, “go to the cinema!” Walt smiled, grabbing your hand and squeezing it.

“Can I first give you a present?” he asked, and you gasped. “You got me a present? I didn’t-“ Walt but a finger to your lips in order to make you shut up. “(Y/n), you did all of this, please just take the present.” Walt softly begged you and you nodded. Walt slowly moved in to press a kiss on your lips before whispering a tiny ‘Thank you’.

Walt quickly stood up and came back after barely a minute with a gift bag in his hand. After he sat down next to you, he handed you the bag wanting you to open it quickly. As you opened it, you revealed a charm on a necklace, clearly crafted by your talented boyfriend.

“What does it do?” You asked him, as you affixed the charm around your neck. “It is a protective charm, and it is also supposed to bring good luck,” Walt scratched his neck, “but I am unsure whether that one succeeded.” Walt hesitated for a second, before he grabbed the charm hanging of your neck. He pressed a kiss on it, before looking you in the eye. “I hope it protects you when I am not there to do so.” Determination shone form his expression, yet the underlining message in his words was clear as day.

One day he might not be there to protect you. His curse will catch up to him, but until then he will cherish you.

It wasn’t easy for Walt to think about the passage of time. He knew he was living on borrowed time, and his curse haunted him every day. But being with you made his life more bearable, it took away some of the endless suffering he went through and most importantly it grounded him. Because if he was not going to life forever, or for long, he will make damn sure it was worth your time. Every minute with you brought and infinity of joy to him, and he wants to protect that forever, even if he would no longer be there.

[themissingnumbers]

Hey! This isn’t an ask, just me yapping about what’s going through my head rn- I hope you don’t mind.

BRUH- I am losing sleep over Fire right now. My brain will not shut up about what if’s, theorizing about what the hell is going on with Fire so I can figure out how/the best way to help him. Y’all said to investigate and use your intuition, but I can’t tell if I’m cooking/on to something or overthinking things. 😅

The fact that there are two different colors—TWO—for when Fire is talking: those being Black and Gold/Yellow. He’s switched between Black and Gold text in two different posts. That being the “first” one he appeared in, and the most recent one (as of writing this ask.) I feel like Black might be the “real” Fire speaking, because Gold is a color I’ve only ever seen be used for when Arceus was speaking and/or present.

And that leads into my next thought. The thought that Fire might not really be Fire. Not in a sense of “oh, it’s a mimic” no. I’m talking like, it’s him in his own body, but there’s something (or someone) that’s getting in the way of him really being himself. Like, someone’s doing the talking for him or subconsciously coaching his responses so he can’t speak his truth. Aka: the words hidden in the talksprites. (Fire CAN feel. (At least, I’m pretty sure he can.) But it’s like whatever senior gold-text is doing is subduing his ability to act on his own.) I know that Fire and Arceus are linked in some way, which is why the god-horse is my prime suspect.

And the smoking gun to my theories and potential overthinking? That last fucking talksprite.

That last talksprite (as of writing this) was like a flicker of humanity in Fire. A glimpse of the real him. There were no shadows on that one, he seemed to genuinely and deeply feel whatever emotion struck him in that moment when Pallette Town was mentioned, and his eyes didn’t have any gold in them. I can’t tell if the lack of gold color in Fire’s eyes was a mistake when drawing, but from what I’ve seen of your art so far, everything is put in a piece with purpose. But then, a second later, all of it was gone. The shadows came back, the gold was back in his eyes, and the look on his face seemed… pensive…? Like he was conflicted or scolding himself? I can’t fully tell, but he seemed tense.

This all scares me. Because now I know that this blog doesn’t really have a predetermined ending, but that the asks can (and will) sway the fates of the characters—and that makes me nervous. I want what’s best for them, but I don’t know what to do or what’s going on, and I feel like if I say one wrong thing I’ll mess everything up. I’m not scared of Fire anymore. I’m scared of hurting Fire and screwing up his chance (and the chances of others) to be happy. Am I cooking with my theories or am I cooked? I don’t know! I’m stressed! AAAAAA-

TL;DR: Missing Numbers has me in a chokehold—and Fire is just the beginning. Please do continue to post stuff. It’s really good. That’s all my ramblings. Sorry if it was annoying.

Referring to this point in the story.

[hiya everyone!! beings some of you have started discussing and collaborating together for the blog, we've decided to release the theory asks we've gotten from the inbox!

I'll be putting em out in the order we recieved them, oldest to newest. we won't be offering any commentary to confirm or deny how accurate they are, but we figured this would be a nice way to allow cross-referencing with each other's thoughts n speculations if you wanted!

theories/speculation like this will be tagged as #mn theories. have fun, and thank you all for your continued interest in the blog!]

[itgraphsandcharts]

hi everyone! asexuals, i need your help!!

hi y’all! its been forever since i’ve posted here, and i’m so sorry for that. i made this account when i was homebound and dealing with becoming disabled as a teenager, and the community you gave me got me through some very tough times. as i came out of that period of my life, still disabled but i went to therapy and tried meds and many other things that improved my life, i abandoned this account. it reminds me of a time in my life when i was deeply unhappy, and i am also no longer in the fandom. thank you to everyone who made my life just that little bit better when i was all alone, i truly will never forget it 🩵🩵🩵 (especially @andaleduardo , who i am not sure is even active anymore but was always a great motivation)

as it happens, i have moved on to bigger and better things. i’m an english major in college and working on my first novel! it’s about a t4t couple discovering that their identities do not make them unloveable. one is ace and one is disabled. this book will be a love letter to all those communities who feel othered by society, who feel like they’ll never find true love.

as a disabled trans person, i have most of my bases covered. but i am not asexual. i would love to have an ace person’s input to make sure i do this community and identity justice in my writing. i am looking especially for people who are both trans and ace who would be willing to share how those identities intersect and what their experience is. i will value any input you have as i have no experience with this identity. if you’re ace and trans, or even ace and cis, please reach out! i would love to ask you a few questions! thank you so much!!

[minerva-is-sleeping]

I didn’t mean it baby -Steven Grant X Reader

NOTES: SPOILERS MOONKNIGHT EP 5, CHARACTER DEATH.

Y’all. I haven't written ANYTHING since 2019 and this episode brought me back for a singular One-Shot. I really have missed writing for y’all and if this does will I’ll continue for the Summer. This one shot is based off The One’s I Love by Olivia Rodrigo (the bridge specifically) . Anyone else as devastated as I am? Also please use your suspension of disbelief idk how y/n got there, y/n does a lot of things I can’t explain. Also y’all I started a BookTok called Ellie_ExLibris please go follow for Book Content! Also extra brownie points if y'all see the other song references in here. Enjoy!

WORD COUNT: 2355

Fluff, Trauma, Character death and angst, reader uses the pronouns She/Her

PLOT: You have managed to get trapped in the asylum between life and death with Marc and Steven after getting killed by Harrow. After discovering Steven was entirely made up by Marc you have to come to terms with the fact that he isn’t truly real but he is a trauma response. All you want to do is talk with him but how could there be time for that now?

“I’ve never seen the gates to the world above so close” Taweret said in disbelief, looking out on a sea of sand, rolling waves of hot air and the dead. The gate stood tall towering over the ship Steven, Marc and Y/n swayed on.

“How do we open them?” Marc asked

“I’m so sorry, your scales never balanced” Taweret said griefstrikenly as she turned her eyes from the gate, Marc and Steven flashed their eyes to the scale that sat at the center of the deck it’s black marbling and gold beaming as if even in this dark place there had been a spotlight placed on it. “Our journey’s come to an end, I cannot stop the inevitable” said the goddess “I was really rooting for you guys but the unbalanced souls of the Duat must claim yours” she sighed, bracing herself to leave. The scale wavered back and forth and Y/n’s eyes widened in shock. ‘Our Journey’s come to an end?’ she thought. We’ve only just started?  The ship creaked and tilted moving faster towards the gate.  

“Taweret! Wait!” Y/n called, her eyes searching for the goddess but she had already gone, “Taweret!” she yelled as a hand came over the side of the boat, grasping and climbing and pulling itself on board,

“Marc… Y/n… they don’t look very friendly” Steven said, taking steps backwards toward the head of the ship, his eyes frantic as the dead appeared all around him.

“Hide.” Marc commanded them both, Y/n hesitated turning to glance at him, if she could just get a read on him she may see the outcome of this situation. Marc looked nervous but he was ready for a fight. “Hide!” he repeated looking at her directly in the eyes. Her heart wavered for a moment and his fear struck her deeply, she knew this wasn't  going to end well. She drug her eyes straight back to the fraying wooden planks of the locked door and she pulled with all her might.

Y/n pulled on the door they had only come through moments ago but it seemed to have completely locked the trio out. She yanked and yelled in frustration “Steven! Marc, help me!” She had turned to see both men, well, one man, both looking completely terrified as the dead came on board and for a moment Y/n caught his eyes, it was brief but there were plenty of words trapped behind them that would have to wait.

⇻

“I can’t wait to tell my mum about you” he said as the two walked on the cold wet London pavement, coming back from a night out on the West End, eating dinner and watching a show. This was the third of many future dates to come. She had met Steven on the bus after he had accidentally fallen asleep on a particularly aggressive man, she pretended he was her husband that had narcolepsy, and saved him from a potentially very nasty fight.

“Oh really? Your Mum? I’ve never had a boy talk about me to his mum before” She laughed trailing slightly behind him.

“Really? Never?” he said in laughable disbelief

“I can’t tell if you are being sarcastic right now Mr.Grant”

“Oh no, I would never. I’m just shocked, if I were any boy you’ve ever been on a date with I just don’t understand how they couldn't talk about you to everyone they meet for eternity” he laughed sheepishly while twiddling with the bag that carried both of their leftovers. She stood there for a moment just taking in the sight and letting the compliment just seep into her bones. He was there underneath a streetlamp on the glazing street wet with light rain that illuminated his face, the chill in the air making his nose slightly pink. Not even two feet away she stood taking in the look and the feeling that is Steven Grant. He. He who felt inevitable and real.

I didn’t mean it baby, I didn’t think it all through

⇻

“Gabon, New York, Dubai..”  Marc said witnessing the lives he took face to face as a mercenary.

“Watch out!” Steven cried. One of the creatures swung a rope around Marcs neck as Steven was becoming cornered

“No!” screeched Y/n as she watched Marc slowly being dragged toward the hull of the ship by his neck, Marc  swung his arms beating the man, no, the thing that was coming at him. The man became sand the more Marc hit him, he wasn't truly physical. “Marc!” Y/n yelled as her eyes widened, she frantically started looking for something, anything, to beat these creatures with, “Steven! Do something!” Steven was at the rudder of the ship in pure shock, his eyes darted between Y/n and Marc.

“Taweret!” he shouted to no response, the goddesses ears had fallen deaf. “Hold on Y/n!” he shouted and she braced herself realizing his plan. Steven pulled the rudder with everything he had in him to tilt the ship. Slowly and then all at once the ship jerked and Marc was thrown towards the center, Y/n clung to the railing and as she started to adjust her grip she felt grainy cold hands slip  around her waist.

“No!” she croaked as a hand slipped around her neck, everything suddenly moved in slow motion, her chest became tight but not because she didn’t have air, it’s cold dead hands were taking everything warm from her body. She felt her skin raise up and her extremities start to go numb. “Steven-” she choked. Her eyes searched the deck and Marc was trying to catch his balance after almost being thrown overboard and when he stood his jaw was met with the body of a baseball bat. Steven clasped a hand over his mouth, his eyes trained on Marc, meanwhile he hadn’t heard Y/n’s distress calls. Marc was now being dragged to the ledge of the ship once again.

“Marc… you’ve got this.” Steven whispered to himself “But… if I’m you then that means I’ve got this too” he said going for the bat that now lays on the ground. Y/n’s  breathing now slowed, her heartbeat seizing to the cold and the soft rock of the boat seemed to be lulling her she was still standing but she could not will herself to move,, she could hear Steven shouting, and through the blurriness of her vision she saw two of the creatures dissipate before Marc.

“Six!” he exclaimed, “I’m coming for you Y/n!” and Steven started swinging and shouting as if it was his first American Little league game. “I’ve always much preferred cricket!” he shouted adrenaline pumping. Y/n suddenly felt sweet relief as if she could breathe again, like the tight hand that had been around her, squeezing her had disappeared. She gasped and fell to her knees coughing and fighting to breathe. When she looked up Steven had fallen down and was now face to face with her.

“Are you alright?” he asked gently cupping her face in his hands, she nodded vigorously.

“I was so cold” she said, a shiver traveling up her spine “Steven I was so cold, it’s like I wasn’t here” she said her voice trembling. Despite her bravery, she had never experienced fear like this, it was true and utter despair.

“It’s okay Love, everythings fine now, yeah? I promise” he said, and just as he finished making promises that will fail he watched as panic spread across her face and she began to yell.

⇻

“You know as a gift shopist, I can’t exactly give you a life of plenty” he said pacing his room. The last few days had been a lot for him, one of Y/n’s friends had gotten engaged and had thrown an extravagant party and Y/n looked like she was on top of the world and a wave of guilt had crashed over him, what if he couldn't provide the life she wants? “I can’t promise an easy road, or safety, I’m sick, I’m weird, I wake up days later and lost” he ranted chewing on his fingers dragging the sand laid around his bed across his floor. “I don't even have a ring for your finger, I don't regularly grocery shop, bloody hell my entire apartment is just garbage collected junk” she watched him intently as he paced his room. She knew about his ‘Illness’ and Marc, Marc had agreed to stay away from her, he promised Steven that he would try to make their relationship relatively normal. She had met Marc, once. Marc had surfaced during Steven and Y/n’s first argument. It was brief and it was just for a second but she knew it was him. He had raised his voice at her which Steven would never do. She had kept asking when she was allowed to meet his mom and when they could have her over and Steven seemed to be becoming more confused and distressed. Marc finally surfaced and  yelled “Stop asking him about his mom!” and that was all it took. Y/n never brought up Steven’s mom again.

I didn’t mean it baby, always ruin good things like you

She now watched the gift shopist pace the splintered floor of his bedroom as she sat criss cross applesauce on the end of his bed. She took a breath and leaned forward  “Steven, I don’t want you to promise me a fair sky above or a kind road below. I just ask that you walk beside me my love. Anyway the wind blows, just be with me” she said outstretching her hand. If there was anything he could love more about this woman it’s that she wears her heart on her sleeve for all to see. “Steven, I love you. All of you” she said looking deeply into his eyes. He left out a deep sigh and he took her hand, he brought it to his lips and he gently kissed it.

“I love you too. I promise to stay with you. Anyway the wind blows” he said, kneeling at the foot of his bed in front of her.

“Anyway the wind blows” she repeated.

⇻

Another one of the creatures had come up behind Steven and it towered over the two of them but Steven retrieved the bat from where he had set it down and he began to ferociously swing it repeatedly, he didn’t stop even after he was sure it was dead. Y/n was still on her knees with her hand clasped over her mouth in shock as she watched the love of her life go absolutely feral in killing a monster. He took a deep breath and stood back shaking his hand. “Ow” he said and then gave Y/n and Marc a thumbs up. Marc began to laugh and Y/n felt a sigh of relief break through her lungs.  Suddenly a horrid screech pierced through the air and a creature grabbed Marc by his neck pulling him down and over the ledge.

“No! No!” Steven screamed as he ran for Marc.

“Steven!” Y/n cried and for a brief moment his gaze met hers, his feet were still moving, his arms were outstretched and his decision had been made and there was nothing she could do to stop it now.

Steven went directly overboard taking the creature with him

“No!” Y/n screamed “Stop the boat!” she yelled to no one.

“Steven!” Marc yelled, he cried Steven’s name over and over his voice straining, Y/n pulling her tired limbs up, still feeling the after effect of whatever that creature did to her, she threw herself against the side of the ship  to look over the ledge. There Steven lay coming to his senses only to see a distant ship with his best friend and the woman he loves onboard.

“Wait- Wait!” he cried pulling himself up, his footsteps becoming heavier with every step.

“Stop the ship! He’s coming! Please!” Y/n cried to no one.

“Stop the boat!” Marc said, slamming his fists on the hull to alert anyone that was listening.

“Wait!” Stephen cried, his voice becoming weaker “Wait!”  his steps becoming stiffer the more he moved “No!” he sobbed his feet were becoming stone. He was unworthy, he couldn’t pass through the field of reeds. “No no no” he cried. The same coldness, the same nothingness overtook his body while Y/n and Marc watched completely helpless. “Marc!” he yelled, his face becoming stone, his breathing became labored and with one last push he let out a cry “Y/n!” his face suddenly became still.

I watched the light drain out of your eyes and it’s no surprise. It’s no surprise.

“Stop the boat please” Y/n begged, clutching the side of the ship. Taweret suddenly reappeared and she left out a gasp.

“Your scales.. They are balanced” she said in shock.

The ground becomes soft and golden. Y/n and Marc had found themselves in the field of reeds and without their person. Their hope.

[ireallydontknowdudee]

Make It Yours | C.L.

Part 2 of Are You Mine

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Summary: you decide to come clean to Charles about something that has been occupying your mind for a while. How will Charles react to it?

WARNINGS: cursing, pregnancy sex, unplanned pregnancy, so if you are under 18, don’t interact please!

Requested: yes by my lovely followers and my whores! <3

Words: 2.250

A/N: As promised here is part 2 and damn it took a turn am I right? This is what you get for being stupid, so don’t be stupid irl! Anyways, I wanna thank my whores for encouraging me and @illicitlimerence-writes for reading over it bc my brain was fried at the end and being cool! c: love y’all. If you want to get tagged comment or dm me!

My masterlist!

Not my GIF!

You jumped out of your uber, which was conveniently parked right in front of the entrance of the restaurant you and Charles had agreed on a couple of hours ago, and inhaled deeply. With swift steps you made your way towards the door and pulled it open, not without struggling a little, because your hand was shaking ever so slightly, but enough for you to be reminded of your nervousness. As soon as you were inside you spotted Charles sitting at the corner table, that you usually sat at. The restaurant had been a common hang out spot for you and Charles growing up, thus had a lot of sentimental value to you and him, and whenever he came back to Monaco from races around the world or you just wanted to talk about important things while enjoying a meal, you would meet up there.

Charles looked up from his phone, that he had his eyes glued on, when he heard the loud noise of the chair across from him being pulled back and got up to hug you with a big smile on his face. “Bonjour ma belle,” he whispered into your ear, which made you blush slightly as you greeted him back and hugged him tightly, before both of you sat down in the comfy chairs.

Your heart felt heavy as you eyed Charles, looking bubblier and happier than ever, because you knew that you asked him to go to dinner with you for a reason: you needed to talk to him, you needed to come clean about something that had been occupying your mind for too long and that involved the Formula One driver in front of you. The problem was you didn´t know how to transform your thoughts into words and how he would react to it, which absolutely terrified you, the uncertainty tearing you apart on the inside.

“Everything alright with you? You have been kind of quiet and not like yourself, “Charles inquired in between bites of his spaghetti Bolognese with an eyebrow raised to underline the suspicion and confusion in his voice.

“Yeah, everything is okay, I am just enjoying the food and listening to you, Mr. Leclerc,” you blurted out without thinking twice about the missed chance to clear your conscience by coming clean to your fuck buddy and, most importantly, your childhood friend, who had been an important part of your life for over a decade and a half and a shoulder to lean on and to find comfort in. Deep down you damned yourself for being too weak to talk to Charles honestly and letting fear stop you.

The brunette man gave you the sweetest, sincerest smile one can give you, making your heart skip a beat and the lump in your throat thicker and heavier, as if it was made from pure concrete that hindered the air you were breathing from spreading in your lungs and the words you so desperately wanted to say from escaping your lips, freeing you from your burden and inner turmoil.

Charles didn´t notice that the happy and carefree face you put on was a façade, to keep him from further interrogating you, so he continued to talk about the past couple days he had spent in Maranello.

After an hour and a half of nodding along to Charles´ stories, because you weren´t able to focus on formulating sentences or a more satisfying reaction to him passionately rambling on about his job, you suggest paying and going to your or his place, which made Charles smirk, thinking he would get laid again, something that had been happening frequently ever since that memorable pool sex in Bora Bora, both of you too desperate to keep your hands to yourselves

“Oh Charles, you have no idea what is coming your way,” you thought to yourself as you were walking out of the restaurant behind Charles and towards his custom Ferrari that he had left around the corner.

“My place?” he simply asked.

“Yes, I would like that Cha,” you said out loud before thinking “in case you don´t like what I am about to tell you.”

-----

The drive from the restaurant down by the harbor to Charles´ luxury apartment up in the hills wasn´t long, so before you knew it you were waiting behind Charles’ back for him to unlock the door, one foot tapping on the floor restlessly until the driver suddenly pulled you into the entrance area of his place, pinned you against the wall and connected his lips with yours hungrily. At first you reciprocated the kiss with just as much excitement and desire for him, but then you remembered that wasn´t what you had followed Charles to his den for and you broke away from his soft pout, much to the confusion of him.

“I need to talk to you,” you said bluntly, trying to avoid his gaze on you.

“Okay? Sure, about what?” he answered with his green eyes scanning your face to identify an expression he hadn´t seen on your face before, a mixture of avoidance, slight panic and a dash of excitement.

“I think it is better if we sit down for this Cha, “you pointed towards the couch in his living room, which was only a few meters away from you.

Charles shrugged and replied: „Whatever you say, ma belle.”. With a muffled groan he eventually sank down on the piece of furniture and carefully pulled you next him, closer than you were comfortable with right now, so you backed a little bit off, creating some much-needed distance. You put the handbag you had brought with you next to you and took a deep, shaky breath.

“Is it about Pierre almost walking in on us doing it in the garage before I left for Maranello? I know that wasn´t ideal and kind of my fault, but I thought you forgave me,” Charles began apologetically, thinking you were still upset about the last conversation you had with him before he had left for Italy. You couldn´t help but smile at Charles and the face he made, his lips in a big pout to portray how sorry he was about it.

You shook your head, still stiff and too uneasy to finally open your mouth.

“Then it must be about you coming to an upcoming race weekend? Like we already talked about?” Charles continued.

You shook your head again, this time a little faster.

“Okay so the only other thing I can think of that you couldn´t possibly tell me at the restaurant is, that you want to try the whole no sexual relations thing again, but- “

“Charles, I think it is too late for that anyways. I am pregnant,” you let out, your knuckles white from clenching your fist as hard as possible. It took a couple of seconds for the words to fully hit the man across from you, but then his eyes widen, making him look goofy.

“W-what? You are what now?

“Pregnant, as in I am with child,” you whispered.

“How? Oh my god- and it´s mine?” Charles look fell on your still flat stomach, his eyes still looking like they were about to fall out of their sockets.

“I think you know how babies are made, so I assume you want to know when you got me pregnant. Do you remember when we had sex in the pool on vacation? Like without a condom?” you let out a small sigh “yeah I guess one time really is enough, Leclerc, because yes, it is obviously yours.”. You grabbed your handbag, to pull out three positive pregnancy tests, handing them to a stunned Charles.

His hands were trembling as he was looking at the clearly visible, two red lines and he just mumbled repeatedly:” I am stupid.”

“We were stupid,” you shrugged your shoulders “and I understand if you don´t want to be a part of it. I decided to keep it and I will go through this on my own if I have to.” You tried your best to sound strong, determined, but you feared him leaving you to deal with this mess on your own, losing your childhood friend, in the process.

All of the sudden he grabbed your hand with his free one and sternly said: „No, I might be dumb, but not a coward, because I am just as much to… blame for this. I won´t leave my friend and my child,” he eyes still expressing some shock as he said it out loud “hanging. I will take care of you, mon ange.”

With the heavy weight lifted off your shoulders and the pregnancy hormones kicking in out of nowhere, you felt hot tears streaming down your face from relief and your hands wrapping around Charles´ neck to pull him into a hug, which he gladly accepted, still being a little shaken up himself, pressing you against his toned chest and giving you a soft peck on the cheek.

Couple seconds passed before he realized:” Wait, you peed on those, didn´t you?”, tossing the test next him with his tongue sticking out as you were laughing and nodding.

-----

Weeks had passed since then and Charles wouldn´t leave your side, as the season, a great one for him, had ended. He had tried to convince you to move in with him, because he wanted to have you in his sight as you were roughly four and a half months pregnant, but you insisted on waiting a little longer, as you weren´t showing a lot and you had not told anyone other than your parents and his mother, not even Pierre, who still had no idea that his friends had slept together, and you were still fine on your own.

Charles and you were watching a movie, when your focus shifted towards his well-trained neck and the veins on it, making you gulp a little and your cheeks turn bright red. Stupid hormones.

This didn´t go unnoticed by Charles, who smirked mischievously and turned towards you, before asking:” Like what you see?”

“Sorry, Charles, I really didn´t mean to, it´s just... the hormones, they are driving me insane, making me want to go all feral on you”

“What´s so bad about that? It´s only natural and on top of that it is what you get from not letting me touch you since telling me about this,” he put his hand on your tiny bump, not letting the smirk escape his lips, being amused by your sudden reaction to him and his body.

“Yes, because friends don´t do that,” you said with sarcasm dripping from every word.

“Mhh, friends also don´t expect a child together, do they?” his hand travelled up to your chest and cupping one breast.

“Good counterpoint, Cha,” you countered, before leaning in and kissing him, giving into your needs, which he gladly reciprocated while giving your boob a squeeze, making you moan easily, not being used to the extra sensitivity of your breasts.

Charles pulled you on top of him, so you straddled him, and began kissing up from your belly to your exposed neck, sucking on your sweet spots and leaving behind marks. The hand on your boob, which was only covered by a lacy bra, discarded of it quickly and the Monégasque leaned forward to lick over your nipple, before sucking on it slightly and pulling on it with his teeth, causing you to desperately grind on his hardening cock.

“Good thing is that you are already pregnant, because you are so fucking beautiful, I´d fuck a baby into you right now, if that was not the case”

“Then fuck me, Charles, what are you waiting for?” you teased.

He didn´t let you ask him twice for it, pulling your sweatpants, that you put on to relax in, down and pushing your panties to one side to slide his cock, that he just took out of the restraining fabric of his pants and boxers, into your wet core without a warning, followed by a groan leaving his lips.

Leaving you no time to adjust, he started pounding into you at a steady, fast speed. Your hand found Charles´ hair and pulled on it, causing him to moan your name and to reach down to your wet core to spread the wetness and to start rubbing your clit in circular motions with his index finger.

You started to move in sync with his motions, but Charles spun you around to take control of the situation and pin you down onto the bed, the new angle allowing him to go even faster, making your toes curl and your walls clench around his cock.

“You can let go for me,” he whispered into your ear while hitting the perfect spot inside of you, the one that made you see stars from the intense pleasure and making you cum after a couple more precise movements. The tightness brought Charles over the edge too and he finished half inside of you and half on your throbbing pussy, mixing his cum with your juices.

With a quick kiss, but without any words, Charles got up and went to the bathroom to get a towel to clean you up with it, which you appreciated.

Now that your mind was clearer, you thought about what you and Charles were again; friends that were having a baby together, and for the very first time ever, you started doubting the rightness of it.

-----

taglist: @mrs-schumacher @illicitlimerence-interacts @esmex44 @simpforpierre @bekybekybeky @sikeyeehaw @gpiggy98 @teamkforeva

[marqmywordsx]

I Won’t Stop Loving You

Yandere!Inumaki x Reader

Warnings: Somnophilia, non con/ dub con (use of cursed speech), possessive tendencies, a touch of stalking, a lil blood, (character has been aged up-5 years after high school)

WC: 1.6K

a/n: Welcome to my very first Jjk fic ever. I… I don’t know what came over me except for the fact that I found out my new kink is Somnophilia and it just WORKS for Inumaki. I honestly don’t know what the fuck I’m doing anymore but I hope y’all enjoy it.

Love me.

It doesn’t work that way.

At least that’s what he tells himself as he stands over your slumbering body. You’d tiptoed to his room in the dead of night eager for sleep. Your luscious lips curled into a desperate pout to ask him a favor.

“Please Toge, I haven’t had a good sleep in ages,” you whine, or more so beg him.

Toge doesn’t like using his cursed speech on friends, especially not on you. And when he orders people to sleep, it’s deep, almost like death. But the way you’re looking at him now, big giant pleading eyes, long lashes, dark circles staining the many creases folded beneath your bottom lashes, there’s no way he can refuse you.

Tonight is different. Tonight he’s made up his mind.

He nods once, unzips his jacket to expose his delicate pink lips. He flicks his tongue over them, staring into your eyes as he holds your face between his large hands and commands, “Sleep.”

You fall limp in his arms and he pushes your hair away from your face. You’re so beautiful. You’re at peace and Toge’s the perfect friend as he lays you in bed.

Toge’s been in love with you since high school. And 5 years later, when you’re both skilled sorcerers purging evil from the world, his adoration for you stays embedded deep in his heart. There’s just something about the way you read his body language and know exactly what it is he’s thinking—or perhaps not exactly. If only he could communicate just how much he craves you.

How irritating it was to witness other men peer at you, your perfect body, your plump lips, the way your pants fit around the curve of your ass. None of them knew you were his. Your wandering eye didn’t help either. He saw the way you looked at Fushiguro.

It’s Toge’s love for you that spurs his final decision. He watches your chest rise and fall softly, the wrinkles in the large sleep shirt you’re wearing rippling in the pale moonlight. There’s a bruise on your upper thigh, half hidden by the hem of fabric drowning you but Toge can see it. He knows exactly where it came from even though you were unsure.

He’d tapped it a few days ago, eyes wide and worried, inquiring about the source. Beside him, you flipped the page of your book nonchalantly before flicking your eyes down to the contusion and furrowing your brow.

“Hmm? Oh that. I… I actually don’t remember. Maybe I ran into a table or something. You know how clumsy I am.”

How he bathed in the beauty that was your soft smile, and reconciled the twitter pated beats of his out of control heartbeat at your gentle chuckle when he flashed you a disapproving glare. It almost made him lose focus, like the night he gave you that bruise.

He couldn’t help it, you’d felt so nice. Deep wonderful breaths as you laid dreaming of a wonderland where you were the queen and all your subjects existed to please you. Of course he can’t know for sure what you were dreaming, but he can imagine it had to be something of that nature if he took your unconscious moans into consideration.

His fingers dug too deeply into your thighs when you blessed him with your dribbling cunt in the wee hours of the night. He’d buried his face down below, licked gently at the little bud nestled in the nest of coily hair. Plunged his tongue inside you to fuck and feast on your pussy as a delicacy. You laid above him dreaming, blissfully unaware of his presence as whimpers dripped from your lips like a leaky faucet in the night.

How could he have kept control when the very idea of you not knowing it was he who made you feel this good, his tongue you pushed yourself further onto for more of the delicious ecstasy you encountered? He’d let a few groans of his own slip through, and a few times you almost woke. The bruise was the only evidence of his nightly activities and he was pleased to know you hadn’t remembered it when he inquired about it.

Tonight that wouldn’t be an issue. Tonight you’d sleep well and deep. But tonight he would have you and make you his.

“Love me.” He whispers the command in the dark. Already he can feel the painful itch in his throat. His brow darkens in frustration. Perhaps cursed speech doesn’t work on a sleeping person?

“Open your legs.”

Your legs part like the gates barring heaven and Toge’s eyes widen in shock. Perhaps you would love him when you woke up. For now, he’ll let you sleep. He knows how exhausted you are.

I’ll take good care of you, he thinks, running a finger down your tender cheek. He sheds his clothes, swiftly and quietly. His cock thumps eagerly against his toned abs and he climbs over your motionless frame. He pulls your sleep shirt over your head and is pleased to see you don’t don a bra.

He watches your nipples in the cool air of the room, a delectable sight he’s only ever dreamed of. Your long curly lashes flutter when he bends down to flick his tongue against one. Nimble fingers skate across your smooth skin, tracing every scar and beauty mark to commit them to memory.

He moves down to your hair swept lips, now dribbling with slick from his eager but sensual touch. You were made for him, and this is all the evidence he needs. He slowly draws a finger down between them, fingers the entrance to your heated heaven—his main course.

Then he pulls his finger away to examine the way it glistens in the moonlight before putting it to his lips and tasting you. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he savors you and he decides he can no longer wait.

He positions himself between your thighs, lining his thick cock head up with your entrance. He rubs it tenderly over your clothed clit, eliciting a sweet little squeak and breathy gasp from your lovely plump lips. Rolling your underwear slowly down your thighs, he sighs at the marvelous view before him.

The precious seconds of euphoria Toge experiences when he eases into your pussy for the first time are the most precious gift he could ever be bestowed. He’d pray to any god that would listen to have the experience played on loop over and over. His love is finally cemented when he bottoms out inside you, a grateful moan escaping him.

“Love me.”

He pulls out of your cunt and instantly misses the way you feel around him. He looks down on you, insatiable desire gnawing in his belly. He drags his hips slowly, cock stuttering as it pushes back into your tight heat. He can tell from your clenching, you like the way he feels too. It’s involuntary, so why, why won’t you love him?

“Love me.”

He pulls back out again so he can see the tip of his cock stretch you wider than your cunt is used to and push deeper inside to spread your walls and take all of him. This is a sight he wants branded into every fold and crease of his brain, a sight he’ll never forget.

“Love me!”

Your whimpers have become moans now, long gasping moans as he sets a pace that he’s no longer able to keep slow and gentle. He pounds into you, grunting with every slap of his balls against your slick covered thighs. You’re so compliant and obedient, arching your back off the bed in order to feel more of him despite your deep slumber. His fingers leave indentations in the sides of your hips, soon to be dark bruises as he clenches his teeth and drags along your velvety walls.

“Love me, please.”

He hardly recognizes his own voice, trembling from ecstasy or maybe the swelling emotion of believing the more he commands you, the more you’ll adore him. His throat is raw now, the salty copper taste of blood coating his damaged throat. He ignores it, coughing between the chorus of your high pitched moans and squeals, the pap pap pap of your hips meeting his balls; a symphony of sounds detailing the most intense love story anyone could ever witness.

Toge continues climbing the euphoric mountain, quickly reaching the peak to plunge willingly over the other side. Blood oozes from his mouth and onto your naked body as he pants like an injured animal over you. He can tell you’re about to come and he’s amazed you’re still seemingly asleep. Your legs start to tremble, you clench so hard around him he almost bites a chunk of his tongue off.

He doesn’t just fuck you, he ravages you, repeating over and over “Love me, Love me, Love me, Love me! Fuck!”

The ghostly reverb of his activated curse hollows away at your mind, yet you stay asleep and dreaming. He’s intent on pouring all his love into you. It’s the only way, he’s sure of it.

His hips stutter, and then he stops, cum spilling inside you in waves of creamy white heat. He tucks his head into your neck, blood stained kisses oozing down the planes of your body. And before his mind goes blank from the pleasure he whispers to you.

“Cum.”

Your body convulses, back arching up as your cunt tightens, and your eyes shoot open, screeching in what he hopes is pleasure and not betrayal or terror. You milk him dry as you flop back down on the bed and amazingly fall back into a quiet slumber.

All good things must come to an end. It’s a saying Toge’s familiar with. It’s what he tells himself every night he visits you. He looks down at your ruined body, smothered in bruises quickly darkening on your skin, blood, sweat, and copious amounts of white milky cum he’s pumped into your cunt.

It’s finally done. You’re his. And for now it's enough for it to be an unspoken secret. One day you'll come around to the inevitable conclusion that you love him too. One day you'll beg for him, and you'll be awake and needy, adoration pooling in your eyes and core.

But until then...

He closes his eyes, reaching for a bottle of cough syrup he stashed in the side table drawer. He spends the next few minutes cleaning you and putting your clothes back on. And when you look almost as normal as you did when the night began, he kisses your forehead and mutters the last command of the night.

“Forget.”

--

[hertzwritings]

The only exception

A/N: It’s the end of smutty/fluffy weekend, which I’m ending with some requests! This if from @one-sweet-gubler​ who’s literally the best for rrequesting and wanting my writing! Hope it pleases you! Request: how about age gap relationship with Henry and he takes you to meet his family, and they don’t approve of you. Angsty and fluffy amd maybe allusions (I think that’s the word I’m thinking of) to you know😉

You can buy me a coffee here, and I’ll write you a personalized drabble, one-shot or multichapter fic – whatever you want, you get!

Remember, feedback feeds the soul and my requests – and askbox – are always open – there’s no limits, because I am me and I have none! Love y’all so much, thank you for being part of this crazy ride.

MASTERLIST

ASK ME ANYTHING/REQUESTS

Pairing: Henry Cavill x female reader

Warnings: language, age gap (reader is 21, Henry is 38), angst, fluff, implied smut

Wordcount: 2.453

The only exception

You smoothed down the fourth dress, you’d tried on and groaned loudly, ripping it off. Henry came into your shared bedroom, his lips curled into a soft smile as he came over and rubbed your shoulders. “Darling, you’ll look good no matter what you wear.” You huffed. “That’s easy for you to say.” He hugged you tightly from behind, gently swaying- “You always look good, and it’s your family. You could show up in ratty sweatpants and they’d be fine.” He kissed your bare shoulder. “What’s wrong, baby?” he asked. He knew you too well. You sighed and put your hands on top of his.

  “I’m scared that the age-thing is going to be a big deal to them.” “Why?” You were still swaying with him. “Because it’s your family. I want them to like me and…” You drew a deep breath. “I don’t want them to think that I’m here for your money or fame.” You finally said in a small voice. He stopped swaying you and slowly turned you to face him, his thumb finding your chin to lift your head gently. “Darling… Why does it matter so much to you? I promise you, I know that you’re not. Isn’t that all that matters?” He asked in a soothing voice. “Yes and no. I just want you to… I don’t know, it’s your family and I know how much they mean to you, and I don’t want to be the one to come between that.” “Darling, I chose you. The moment I met you. The very first glimpse I had of you, you were inherently imbedded in me. If they don’t find that agreeable or enough, then screw them.” You sighed. You knew there was no way you’d be able to convince him of how worried you were, because he was a romantic and an optimist; the world simply had to agree. “Wear the green dress. You look stunning in that.” He said before kissing you deeply. “Fine. Only because you asked so nicely.” You mumbled against his lips.

---------

The drive was agony for you. It’s strange how much people, you’d never even met, mattered – their opinion, their feelings… it meant the world to you to be accepted and the fear that they wouldn’t, made you want to vomit. Henry squeezed your hand reassuringly and pulled into a driveway, stilling the engine. “It’s going to be alright, love.” “How are you not nervous about this?” You asked in a small, quivering voice. “I think you’re nervous enough for the both of us, darling.” He chuckled. “I don’t know. I am a little nervous, but not because of your age. I worry that my mother has another scheme planned. He said, kissing your knuckles. “We’ll be fine.” He mumbled. You nodded and tried to draw a deep breath. “If you want to stay in the car for a little bit, we can. Get your nerves under control.” You nodded once and held his hand, your heart pounding in your chest.

You knew that it shouldn’t matter much to you. You loved Henry for who he was, and it should be all that mattered. You lived together and you had been able to handle tabloids talking out of their ass about your relationship, but if his family didn’t approve, you feared that he’d break up; his family meant a lot to him, and you knew it. You also knew that his mother had made a habit out of ambushing him with “plans” – sometimes an ex would randomly show up, sometimes a family friend, but they all had the same in common; they were in her eyes, a perfect match for Henry. He had groaned about it several times, when he came home from a visit with them, and you felt your stomach swoop every time he did – it was very clear, that you’d have to work very hard to get them to accept you.

“Let’s do it.” You finally said, trying to swallow your heart back in place. He smiled gently and you got out of the car, clammy hands in his, to knock on the door.

“Henry!” His mom hugged him tightly, before her eyes fell on you. “Oh. Y/N, I presume?” Her cheery attitude had changed the minute she saw you. “Yes, Mrs. Cavill. Happy to meet you.” “Yes, well…” She smiled tightly. “Come on in, everybody’s here.” You followed Henry with a sinking feeling that this wasn’t going to go the way he had hoped for. Henry rubbed comforting circles on your back as you were introduced to his family and their partners – all of them gave you a strange look and barely muttered a hello. You saw Henry’s jaw clench.

“Henry, did I tell you that Martha is stopping by? Such a lovely girl, simply endearing.” You worried for Henry’s teeth – his jaw was clamped so tightly, his teeth must’ve been hurting under the pressure. “Mum…” “Oh, stop with the mum. You know, she’s single.” His mom started arranging tea on trays, lining it up to get ready for the afternoon-tea, you had been invited to. She didn’t set the full number of cups. “We’ve been over this, mother. You’re being obtuse.” She huffed and turned to face Henry fully, hands on her hips. “I am not being obtuse. She’s a very nice woman, and we would love her here.” The implication wasn’t lost on you, and you swallowed thickly, slipping out from under Henry’s protective arm. “I need to use the restroom.” You muttered, not waiting for an answer, but simply weaved your way through the gathering of family, that didn’t like you in any way, their eyes following you with sneers on their faces, and found a guest bathroom, slamming the door and sitting heavily on the toilet, trying to keep your tears at bay. You knew it. They wouldn’t accept you – you weren’t what they expected of their son, much less what they wanted in their family. Clearly, his mother was keener on Martha, who she had invited. Jesus Christ, you were going to lose it.

You heard voices outside and stilled your panicked breaths, keeping quiet. “I told you, he’d bring someone like her.” It sounded like one of his brothers. “Yes, yes, I know. I just… He’s only doing it to get a reaction from your mother and I. He’s acting like a teenager.” His dad. “You know Henry, he wants to go against whatever you think.” Silence fell. “She’s too young for him.” “You’re telling me.” “I knew it, I just knew he’d find someone like that. Young and money hungry. Fame-hungry, even.” A deep sigh. “He could at least pretend to be happy that we even allowed her inside the house. She wasn’t invited, and he knew it.” “Dad…” “No, I don’t want to hear it. I refuse to let a child wander around with Henry like he’s her priced possession just because he’s trying to prove some silly point.” “You would have made it easier if you hadn’t told him Martha was coming.” A huff. You cried silently; every single worry you had seemed to be warranted. “It’s not fair to her. Henry used to date her, and they made a brilliant match.” “Dad… Let him run it out. He’s blowing off steam, and it’ll end soon enough. You know him, a girl with nice tits shows up, he’s a goner.” They both laughed. “At least he has some taste. She’s a pretty, little thing. Let’s hope she doesn’t rip him for all he’s worth.” They both laughed and they laughter became fainter and fainter as they walked away – you were about to have a full panic attack.

The way they talked about you made you feel sick. You had hoped that at least one of them would be just a little forthcoming, but they all seemed to think the same; you were a gold-digger with a nice body. It was disgusting. You gathered yourself and wiped the tears from your face – there wasn’t a chance in hell that you’d let them see how they’d made you feel. You just wanted to leave.

You unlocked the door and with a straight back, weaved back through the family, finding Henry deep in argument with his mother. “I’m not here to find anyone, I already have someone, mum, I’m here because I wanted to introduce my girlfriend to my family!” He yelled. “You’ve got a lot of nerve, trying to play a game with me, when you knew she was coming with me.” His mother scoffed, pursing her lips. “Not with my blessing, she didn’t.” Henry threw his hands up and glared at his mother. “I don’t know why on earth you’re so hellbent on hating a woman, you’ve never met, that I love. It’s not a fling, it’s not a fickle thing, we live together, mum. I’m not letting her go, especially not because you want me to.” You stepped into the kitchen and let your hand wrap around his arm. “I’m going to leave. You stay.” He turned his face to say something, but his mother cut in. “That seems like a wonderful idea, dear.” You glared at her and any inkling of goodwill in you disappeared when you saw her sneering face. “You know, I’m not doing it for you. I’m leaving because I don’t want Henry to be upset or have to chose between me and his family.” You said in a low voice, trying to keep your cool. “I would have expected at least a modicum of respect, just an ounce, a sliver of respect and acceptance, not towards me, but to your son. You may very well be his mother, but you are abhorrent in your ways, and the fact that you act as if you’re better than me, makes me feel sorry for you.” Henry pulled you closer to his body. “I know what you’re all thinking, I even heard it loud and clear.” You turned to face his father with a poisonous smile on your lips. “While I am glad that you believe your son to have taste…” You spat out. “I am disgusted by the way you were talking about me, a stranger to you. If I didn’t know better, I wouldn’t believe a kind, gentle and caring man like Henry came from a family like this. I am absolutely disgusted by your way of thinking and your treatment of a person, who only wanted the very best for your son.” You drew a deep breath and narrowed your eyes. “I am not here for his money, his looks or his fame. I’m here for Henry, the kind and loving man I know. Not that it’s any of your doing, it would seem.” You turned to face his mother again, who looked like she had swallowed a lemon. “I thank you for not only completely ruining any chance we had to get along, but also for hurting your son. Me, I don’t care about, but him? God, he deserves better.” You bowed to her. “Thank you for not inviting me and thank you for making it abundantly clear that you dislike whatever Henry wants to do. I have no desire to be involved with this family if this is how it is.” You stood on your toes and kissed Henry’s cheek. “You can stay if you want. No pressure from me. I’ll haul a cab or an Uber. I love you.” You didn’t give him time to respond, nor did you react to his father’s voice calling out for you, but simply left the house, holding tears back until you were well down the road.

Fucking idiot, you were – thinking that the family, that had hounded Henry for as long as you knew him to find a “real” woman to suit him better, would ever accept you. It was stupid really, to get your hopes up, even just a sliver. Tears cascaded down your cheeks, and you wiped them angrily, pulling your phone out to find either a cab, an Uber or the nearest bridge to fling yourself off from. The familiar hum of an engine sounded behind you, and a door opened – Henry’s warm, thick arms enveloped you, holding you tightly to his warm chest, as you sobbed into his shirt, staining it with mascara. “Oh, sweetheart…” He rested his chin on top of your head. “You didn’t have to leave, Henry. It’s your family, just go back.” You mumbled into his shirt. If he heard you, he didn’t let on. He just kept hugging you.

“You know, you’re the first person to ever say anything to them.” He mumbled into your hair. “I’m sorry. I just couldn’t…” “Don’t be sorry, love.” He pulled you a little out from his body to look at you. “I should’ve known better. I thought that… When they saw you, got you know you, they’d be okay. Clearly, I was wrong.” “It’s not your fault.” “Neither is it yours.” He said and kissed your forehead. “Let’s go home.” “Are you sure? You can stay, I really don’t mind.” You told him in a small voice. “I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.” He said with determination. As you got in the car, he shot you a small, comforting smile.

The drive back was in silence, simply letting both of you process what happened at the house. “You know, I talked to them as well. Or, rather, yelled at them.” He mumbled, turning the car down the familiar road, where your shared house appeared slowly to your eyes. “Henry…” “No, they don’t get to do that. I’d much rather choose you and be happy than stay in my family’s house and be utterly unhappy.” He said with a small smile. The car stopped moving and you glanced to your front door, the soft sway of lavender and roses around the walkway calming you. “I never wanted you to choose, you know.” He kissed you deeply. “It’s never been a choice.” As you stepped inside the house and toed your shoes off – not before Kal had practically tackled you – Henry held you tightly, his eyes twinkling with mirth.

“Hmm, you know…” He kissed you. “There’s something very attractive about you when you become all assertive.” He kissed you again, deepening the kiss – there was something both desperate and dominant, that lingered just under the surface of the kiss. You felt warm. “Oh, yeah?” you mumbled against his lips, his fingers running up under the hem of your dress. “Definitely…” When your back hit the bed, his deep voice whispering the things he’d do to you, you weren’t worried anymore. The worry could be handled later.

TAGLIST:  @acaceta​ @a-skov​ @angelmather1​ @cooldreamlandsandwich​ @est1887​ @enchantedbytomandhenry​ @fionnthebandersnacc​ @herroyalbubbliness​ @keiva1000​ @kebabgirl67​ @luclittlepond @mis-lil-red​ @multifanficdom @one-sweet-gubler​ @pandaxnienke​ @perfunctory-username69 @sleutherclaw​ @summersong69​ @spookyboogyuniverse​ @stardusted26​ @thereisa8ella​ @timetraveller4​ @thatonechickhere​ @themanfromu​ @thelastpyle​ @yourlocalhoney​ @wheretheriversrunintothesea​    

[drabbles-mc]

Really That Simple

Horacio Carrillo x Steve Murphy

Gift for thee love of my life @narcolini for the Narcos Fanfiction Exchange 2022

Warnings: 18+, language, mentions of blood/injuries, steamy things/implied smut (it’s hate-fucking hours out here and we love that), angst, repressed feelings out the wazoo

Word Count: 5.6k

A/N: I know that this pairing isn’t everyone’s bag and that’s fine. But y’all writing this fic rejuvenated me as a writer in a way that I cannot fully explain. I love these horrid little men. I am still having. So many thoughts about these two.

Narcos Taglist: @garbinge @thesandbeneathmytoes @bruxasolta @winchestershiresauce @sizzlingcloudmentality @alm0501 @panagiasikelia @616wilsons @hauntedforsst @mirabee @buckybarneshairpullingkink @boomclapxox @nessamc @southotheborder @supersanelyromantic @padbrookcottage @mysun-n-stars @raincoffeeandfandoms @bport76 @marrianena @passionatewrites​ @ashlingnarcos​ (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, please let me know!)

Carrillo sighed deeply as the two of them left the scene of their botched excursion in the rearview. The fact that this was the case, proved that two miracles had taken place. One, that they didn’t get killed, by anyone else or by each other. Two, that the car still managed to work even after the sides getting riddled with bullets. How neither of them nor the car managed to get hit somewhere vital was beyond all reasoning. Steve didn’t much believe in god these days but someone or something must’ve been looking out for them.

Or maybe whoever, whatever it was, was just dragging it out for the sake of enjoyment. He and the colonel had made it through the thick of it, but with each exasperated sigh and shake of his head, Carrillo seemed like he was getting closer and closer to pulling the car over and putting a bullet in Steve’s back himself. The DEA agent had simply been hoping that the man would cool off, maybe even take a brief second to enjoy the fact that they didn’t fucking die when they probably should have. He should’ve known better.

So, despite the fact that he had one arm limp, sticky with drying blood after a bullet had torn through it, despite the fact that Carrillo was definitely the reason he didn’t catch a second bullet, one to the skull, despite that maybe the mess that they’d gotten into was his fault more than Carrillo’s, Steve still found himself gearing up for an argument. If it was going to be the last thing that he got to say, he might as well go out doing something that he did best—getting under Carrillo’s skin.

“If you got something to say, Colonel,” the use of the title sounded more sarcastic than anything else, “just fucking say it. Before you suck up all the oxygen in here.”

“That shouldn’t be a problem,” he shot back, “considering we have more holes than doors,” he stopped himself before continuing, the thanks to you was implied clearly enough without him having to say it.

Steve let his head drop back against the headrest, shutting his eyes but still not done with the conversation, “Let’s just get this over with now before we get back to the base. If you’re gonna ream me out, you don’t gotta do it in front of a bunch of officers who hate me almost as much as you do.” Steve heard Carrillo scoff, and mumble something under his breath in Spanish. He sat upright a little more, turning to face the man driving the car, “What was that?”

Carrillo didn’t take his eyes off the road, but his voice was clear, condescendingly so, “Almost.”

Steve rolled his eyes—he was too tired, too angry, too fed up with the constant power struggle that he had been locked in with the man next to him since the day that he set foot in Medellín. “Why?” he asked, studying Carrillo’s face, knowing that his expression would say more than his words ever would.

His brows came together, “Why what, Agent Murphy?”

“Why do you have such a problem with me? I,” he waved his good hand dismissively, “I get you gotta hate all of us gringos a certain amount to keep your credit as a Colombian Colonel or whatever. I know you can’t let me have an easy fuckin’ time of anything. But what the fuck did I do that makes it so impossible for you to work with me?” he almost said to like me, but he felt that would be a step too far. He also didn’t really know if Carrillo particularly liked anyone—perhaps that would be asking a bit too much.

Carrillo was white-knuckling the steering wheel by this point. His jaw was clenched tight as he shook his head, “You think it’s so simple. You always think everything is so fucking simple.”

Steve’s laugh was sarcastic, hollow, “Trust me, I’ve figured out quick since getting down here that nothing we do here is simple.”

“None of it anywhere is simple,” he snapped, “That’s the whole fucking point. Was life simple for you back in Miami? Did it only get complicated when you came down here?” Steve’s silence spoke volumes, and Carrillo scoffed, “Then you weren’t paying attention until you got here.”

“What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?” Steve asked, further proving the other man’s point.

“I’m not going to spell it out for you,” Carrillo was heavily contemplating driving both of them off the road just to save them from having to continue this conversation, or any conversation, really.

Steve took a deep, calculated breath, knowing that his response to that statement was going to make or break what happened for the rest of the drive. The wrong response and he had no doubt that Carrillo would boot him directly out of the moving vehicle, leave him to be Javier’s problem or whoever else was going to get stuck on pick-up duty.

He exhaled sharply through his nose, the wound in his arm cutting down on his ability to talk with his hands the way that he preferred to when he was angry, “You say all that shit about not wanting to spell things out for me. Fine. But you can’t fuckin’ expect people to do what you want them to if you don’t fucking tell them what you want.”

Carrillo rolled to a stop at a red light, glancing over at Steve, frustration still rolling off of him in waves, “You’re saying that if I told you what I wanted you to do you would just do it?” he took one hand off the wheel and Steve could tell that he was fighting the urge to slam it back down onto it, “Is that what that was back there? You doing what you were told?”

Some of Steve’s anger diffused, but only slightly. If they still hadn’t been dealing with the unfortunate fallout of the situation, maybe he would’ve had a better argument for it all. But, as it stood, he was getting blood all over the console and seat of Carrillo’s CNP vehicle so he didn’t have much room to defend himself on this one.

“It doesn’t usually go like that,” Steve half-mumbled.

“It only has to go worse than that once to cost all of us everything.”

He could tell by the look on his face that it wasn’t a sentimental statement. Carrillo wasn’t waxing poetic about how losing him would take a large emotional toll. Still, he felt like Carrillo was being a little dramatic about it, which wasn’t quite like him. “The wheels always keep turning. Just a matter of who’s left to turn them.”

Carrillo’s laugh was hollow as the light turned green and the car started moving again, “You think that’s how it would go? If we—if I lost an American DEA agent during all of this?” he shook his head, “No. Search Bloc loses me? They’ll find another colonel to replace me. They’d probably be happy to do it. But if we lose an American? That’s when the wheels would stop.”

“You really think they’d—”

“Yes,” he cut Steve off, “I do.”

Steve thought on it for a moment, and even if he was starting to see the colonel’s point, he wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of saying it out loud. “So, what?” he grimaced as another jolt of pain went through his arm, “Gonna put me in some fucking bubble-wrap?”

Carrillo pressed his lips into a thin line, “After today, Murphy? That seems more likely than you actually taking direction. We’ll see.”

There it was. The two of them could never be too honest for too long. Either of them making the effort to be real with each other always had to be quickly coated over with barbs and snide comments. Anything other than that felt like they were getting too close to finding common ground. Getting along too well would rock the boat, and that was the last thing that they needed.

“You say that all the time about me,” Steve shook his head, turning to look out the window, “But it’s not like Javi is any better.”

Carrillo’s voice was perfectly even, “But you’re not Peña.”

“Yea,” Steve scoffed out a laugh, “Thanks for the reminder.”

Part of Carrillo wanted to say, “That wouldn’t be a bad thing if you didn’t make it one,” but he stopped himself. He wasn’t going to give Steve any spare kindness just because he was bleeding on the console. The colonel had never been one to pity anyone and he wasn’t going to start now, especially not with Steve.

“You should keep pressure on your arm.”

Steve rolled his eyes but he did make a little bit more of an effort to pin his arm to his side despite the exhaustion he was feeling, “If I bled out, I wouldn’t be your problem anymore.”

“It won’t kill you,” Carrillo said plainly, “It’ll just make a mess.”

“Yea,” Steve laughed sarcastically, “because this car is in such good shape right now.”

Carrillo almost smiled, almost chuckled, but he stopped himself, “Again—it didn’t have to be like this.”

“How long till we’re back at the base?” Steve asked, changing the subject

“Hospital first,” Carrillo corrected, “Then we’ll go back.”

Steve sighed heavily, “Are you fuckin’ kidding me?”

“No,” his tone was sharp.

“You just said that it’s not—”

“You’re going,” he wasn’t in the mood for another drawn out argument.

Neither of them said anything more for the rest of the drive. When he parked the car, Carrillo quickly stepped out. He was at least going to do Steve the bare minimum courtesy of opening the car door for him since he was essentially only working with one arm, but Steve kicked the door open before he could.

“Don’t wait for me,” he wanted to wave the colonel off but he couldn’t, “I’ll get a cab back to the base.”

“No,” Carrillo said as he followed him into the hospital.

“Why not?”

He raised his eyebrows slightly, “Because that’s a stupid plan,” he saw Steve open his mouth to argue and cut him off before he could really start, “This isn’t going to take long. I’ll wait. No point in risking riding alone now.”

“Colonel—”

“Just get your fucking arm taken care of, Agent Murphy,” he pointed in the way that he should start heading, “Take the direction for once.”

Steve’s jaw was clenched as he weighed out whether or not he wanted to put up more of a fight about it. He didn’t want to just prove that Carrillo had been right about him all along, but he also didn’t want to just give in to his demands either. This wasn’t a mission—he wasn’t beholden to what the man said.

Carrillo could see that Steve was trying to figure out his play. Despite his exhaustion and his desire to wrap this all up so he could just go the fuck home, he didn’t say anything else. He just stood there, waiting to see if Steve was really going to put up a fight about it. He tried his best to keep a neutral expression, knowing that if he got mad, it would just give Steve more of a reason to push back against him.

Their standoff was interrupted by the sound of someone clearing their throat. They both turned to see a young nurse standing there, looking a little nervous knowing that she was probably intruding on something, but also unable to ignore Steve’s arm.

“Have you been seen yet, sir?” the answer was obvious but she figured it would give him the out if he was going to leave.

“No,” Carrillo cut in and answered for him, “He hasn’t.”

Steve shook his head at the man but reined in his frustration, not wanting to take it out on the poor girl who was just trying to do her job. She held her arm out, motioning for him to follow her, “Right this way, then,” Steve fell into stride beside her and she could feel the irritation he was giving off, “We’ll try to get you in and out as quickly as we can, sir.”

“Steve,” he corrected her gently, sensing her apprehension, and he supposed that he couldn’t blame her, “You can just call me Steve.”

She nodded as she pushed open the door to a small examination room, “Okay. Take a seat, Steve. I’ll be back with some things to help fix up your arm.”

The young nurse was true to her word, making quick work of cleaning and stitching Steve up. She even went and grabbed him a fresh shirt, not wanting to make him put on the polo he’d previously been wearing that was caked in blood. She’d offered to put it in a bag for him if he was really attached to it and wanted to take it home to clean, but he just told her to toss it. The plain white short-sleeve that she’d given him would work just fine until he got back to his apartment, then it would get tossed into the drawer with all the others.

When he walked back out towards the lobby where he’d left Carrillo, it took him a moment to realize that it was Steve waiting for him, the fresh shirt and bandages throwing him off a bit. He looked up at Steve from the chair he was sitting in, immediately making the decision to stand up when he realized how much he didn’t exactly like having to look so far up at him.

“Looks like they got to you too,” Steve gestured to the tiny bandage over the cut on the side of Carrillo’s head.

“Wasn’t worth the argument,” Carrillo’s tone was flat, but his eyes zeroed in on Steve’s freshly bandaged arm.

“Sure,” Steve didn’t give him any cue about leaving other than simply turning and walking towards the door, “with them it’s not worth the argument.”

“They’re a bit more sympathetic,” he said with a shake of his head as he walked past Steve, opening the car door and sliding behind the steering wheel.

They were already on the road again when Steve responded, “I got shot for you,” he said, and it was half a joke, half not, “That doesn’t get your sympathy?”

The tension was instantly back in Carrillo’s shoulders, “You didn’t get shot for me,” he stepped on the gas pedal a little more abruptly than necessary, his turn off of the main street and onto the dirt side road more abrupt than it needed to be just because he could, “You got shot because of you.”

It was far from the worst thing that Carrillo had ever said to him in his time in Colombia, but for some reason it was the last straw. Steve shook his head, “Turn around.”

“What?” it wasn’t often that Carrillo seemed genuinely confused, but the demand definitely caught him off-guard.

“Turn the fucking car around,” Steve said, expanding on his previous instruction, “Drop me back at the hospital. I’ll have Javi or someone come and get me.”

“Don’t—”

“Or pull over,” he pointed to a turnoff on the side of the desolate road, “Just let me out of the fucking car.”

“Murphy—”

“Do it!” it wasn’t the first time Steve had gotten loud with the colonel, but this felt different.

It felt so different, in fact, that Carrillo actually gave in. He didn’t have any intention of actually leaving Steve stranded on the side of the road, but whatever the DEA Agent felt he had to do to get the anger out of his system, Carrillo would give him that. If for no other reason than to know what it was about to turn into.

The car had barely rolled to a stop when Steve flung the door open and stepped out. He still didn’t have full range of motion in his arm, but it didn’t stop him from reaching and raking his hands back through his hair in frustration, chest rising and falling dramatically as his anger continued to bubble over.

Carrillo cut the engine, leaving the keys on the center console that was still smeared with Steve’s blood from the drive over. Shutting the door behind him, he walked around to the other side of the car where Steve was angrily pacing and muttering only god knew what under his breath. All the years of little digs and minor acts of insubordination, and one of them finally cracked. Carrillo wondered if Steve was going to try and swing on him with his good arm or what. He was more curious than anything.

“I’m not just going to leave you stranded here Agent Mur—”

He didn’t get the rest of Steve’s name out, words falling by the wayside as Steve closed the distance between them in two freakishly long strides, proceeding to slam the man up against the side of the car. Steve’s fists were balled tight into Carrillo’s fatigues, tempted to lift him off the ground the way a high school bully would before shoving an underclassman into a locker.

Carrillo couldn’t deny that the action caught him off-guard—it certainly hadn’t been what he was expecting. He could feel Steve’s breath against his skin, their faces closer than they’d ever been before. He could see the anger clear as day in Steve’s eyes, but he still hadn’t said anything. Carrillo kept his mouth shut.

“Why not? Huh?” Steve’s hands were shaking but he refused to loosen his grip, “You don’t want me to be your problem anymore? Fine. Drive the fuck away.”

What Carrillo really wanted to say was that he couldn’t drive away with Steve pinning him to the side of the car. Instead, what came out was, “You’re bleeding again.”

Steve’s eyes flicked to the bandages on his arm, the white gauze slowly turning red, “Fuck,” he cursed, shaking his head but still not letting go.

Carrillo could’ve easily pushed him away, but he didn’t. There were countless opportunities throughout this whole thing for him to get the upper hand and yet he let Steve have the win. It was curious, since he never really let Steve have the win under any other circumstance—hence the argument.

“Let’s say I leave you here,” Carrillo’s tone clearly conveyed how much he was trying to get a rise out of Steve now, “then what, hm? You fucking wait here just to see me again later tonight? Or tomorrow morning? What does it get you?”

The tic in Steve’s jaw was impossible to miss as he tried to string his words together, “What the fuck do you want from me, Carrillo? Honestly, what would get you off my fucking back?”

He shook his head, “Nothing. That’s the whole fucking point, Steve.”

All of his years in Colombia and Steve could confirm with certainty that Carrillo had never used his first name. And vice versa. It was always gringo, or carne fresca, or Agent Murphy, or whatever other insults the man could come up with on the fly. But never Steve.

His grip loosened slightly, the relief instant in his injured arm although the rest of his body, and his entire brain, were on the brink of short-circuiting. Carrillo’s eyes didn’t waver from his. The DEA agent’s chest was still rising and falling with each deep breath, and he felt like his heart was about to burst clean out of his ribcage, from adrenaline or anger he wasn’t quite sure which. On the other hand, Carrillo’s breathing was frighteningly even, arms still hanging limply by his sides like he wasn’t even worried about the possibility of Steve losing his shit and hauling off for real.

“So,” each word Steve spoke felt like a herculean effort, “that’s it, then? Nothing is ever going to be good enough?”

He didn’t respond to the accusation. Instead, he took a beat and said, “Are you ready now, Agent Murphy?” his voice toeing the line between professional and sarcastic.

It was the strangest feeling of disappointment that Steve had ever experienced. The disappointment quickly shifted right back to anger as he pressed his forearm harder against the Carrillo’s chest, “No.”

Carrillo froze for a second, “What?”

“I’m not—I’m not fuckin’ ready.”

He was trying to keep his breathing under control, but Carrillo wondered if Steve could feel the erratic beating of his heart against his arm. Even with guns pointed to his head before, the colonel had never felt quite like this. Life and death scenarios had a simplicity to them that this situation didn’t. The harder that Steve leaned into him, the more weight he pushed onto his chest, the closer the two of them became.

Carrillo was trying to force himself to say something, some sort of scathing comment to get him out of whatever this mess was about to turn into, but he couldn’t. Steve’s eyes had him pinned harder than his arm, unable to move, unable to speak, unable to fucking think.

And Steve could see it. Despite the frustration and the conflicting feelings of inadequacy while also thinking that maybe Carrillo owed him a little bit of a thank you every now and again, Steve knew that in this moment he had the upper hand. And he never had the upper hand with Carrillo. Towering over him had never felt so good.

Steve felt the shift in the man’s breathing, the change in how his chest pressed against his arm. He knew from the look in Carrillo’s eyes that he was gearing up so say something, or to finally, maybe, fight back. Steve didn’t know what was coming next, but the second the colonel’s lips parted to try and speak, Steve robbed him of the opportunity by crashing their lips together.

It was sloppy, tense, awkward, but Carrillo didn’t push him away. It would’ve taken nothing for him to drop Steve to the ground, and even though this was all Steve’s doing, he was a little surprised that the colonel hadn’t done just that.

His arm shifted, fist finally unfurling as he went from pinning Carrillo to the car with his arm, to doing it with his entire body, his hand roughly cupping Carrillo’s jaw, biting at the man’s lip like it was the only way he knew how to get rid of the frustration that had been bubbling up inside of him. His other arm braced against the side of the car beside Carrillo’s head, almost caging the man in but not quite. Carrillo’s one hand gripping tightly onto Steve’s forearm, not pulling him away, not trying to get him to release the harsh grasp on his jaw, just trying to match the energy the only way he could think to.

“Fuck,” the word fell from Steve’s lips, somewhere between a grunt and a whisper as he pulled away.

Before he knew what he was doing, Carrillo tightened his hold on Steve’s arm, twisting his grip slightly to gain a little more control. Steve felt the shift, too, eyes darting back and forth between Carrillo’s eyes and his lips. They were already long past the point of no return. Carrillo knew that. Steve knew that. As they both stood there, bodies pinned against each other on the side of the road in the middle of fucking nowhere, they each wondered if the other knew.

“Fuck,” Steve repeated, his tone different this time, almost like he was admitting defeat.

Carrillo was afraid that that was it. What was more alarming to him was the fact that he didn’t want that to be it. The exasperation in Steve’s voice almost made him protest but at the last second, he realized that Steve’s sense of defeat was because he was giving in. Hardly a second later he was everywhere, lips on his, hands all over, one leg wedging itself between Carrillo’s as he pushed harder against him. There wasn’t an ounce of gentleness.

It wasn’t often that someone bested Carrillo, was able to get any sort of upper hand on him. Even more rare than that were the times that he would ever let someone have any kind of advantage over him. But there he was, allowing himself to be used and bruised by Steve fucking Murphy of all people.

Steve’s lack of grace, lack of finesse, was something that was so constant across all areas of his life. And in every other circumstance, it was one of the things that Carrillo was bothered by the most. But the messy, angry, desperate way that his hands grabbed him and pulled at his clothes had Carrillo thinking that this was the payoff for the rest of it. In the moment, it seemed like more than a fair trade. Steve’s fingers clumsily battled with the belt of Carrillo’s fatigues, and while he could’ve made it a little easier for him, he figured that he’d made things easy enough for Steve so far. A few extra seconds of struggle would be good for him.

Carrillo was about to say something, but whatever it was, Steve didn’t care to hear it. He saw the look on Carrillo’s face and before he could even take a breath to prepare, Steve cut him off, “Don’t.”

Much to both of their surprise, Carrillo listened. It was one of the few times that Steve let his actions do all of the speaking for him. There wasn’t much of a need for either of them to say much—this wasn’t some sweet confession of a moment. This wasn’t the kickoff of some sort of clandestine romance, something that would turn into a, “We’ll see where it goes,” situation behind closed doors. This was months and months of anger and annoyance and frustration coming out in the only way that didn’t involve one of them getting punched in the face. They’d finally reached a breaking point that could’ve gone one of two ways, and the silent agreement to handle it like this meant that they were going to handle the fallout the same way—silently. For all of Carrillo’s talk of everything being complicated, this was one thing that was incredibly simple.

Steve had never successfully made himself an overpowering presence until that moment. The ease with which he was so roughly maneuvering Carrillo’s body was something that he would’ve taken the time to be impressed by if his mind hadn’t zeroed in on the outcome of this so much. If his face hadn’t been so deeply buried into the crook of Carrillo’s neck, he might’ve gone on a bit of a power trip from seeing the expression on the man’s face. Carrillo’s hands were like vices in the way they held onto him so fiercely.

Then, as roughly and abruptly as it had started, it was over. Steve’s body went lax, still keeping Carrillo pinned against the car but in a much gentler manner than before as he tried to catch his breath. As his mind started to slow down, started to clear, that was when he felt Carrillo’s harsh grip still enveloping his arm, somehow narrowly missing the bandages that were much more saturated in blood than they had been a few minutes before. Steve briefly wondered if he had done that intentionally, or if it just happened to be luck. He wasn’t going to ask.

Finally peeling himself away, Steve allowed Carrillo a beat of breathing room. They each set about redressing and adjusting, neither of them saying anything to each other even in the brief moments when their eyes met. Steve’s still slightly-disheveled appearance could at least be blamed on the fact that he got shot. Aside from the mildly confused expression on his face, though, Carrillo had managed to make himself look no worse for wear. The fast rise and fall of his chest the only giveaway that anything had transpired.

When the two of them were as resituated as they were going to be, they lingered in place for a moment. Carrillo leaned back against the car, the placement much more casual than it had been a few minutes before. Folding his arm across his chest, he watched Steve watch him, unable to really read the look in the man’s eyes. Steve reached up and raked his fingers through his hair once more, looking like he was mulling over what exactly he wanted to say. Carrillo was still prepared for the worst, but without any further acknowledgment, Steve sighed, turned around and got back into the car, the door slamming behind him like a punctuation mark for the entire thing.

Carrillo frowned and shook his head before heading back to his side of the car. Steve wasn’t looking at him when he got in, too focused on the blood-soaked bandages wrapped around his arm, knowing he was going to have to switch out his bandages sooner than planned. He was shaking his head but for the first time all afternoon, Carrillo didn’t feel like it was really at him. Neither of them said anything as he put the car in drive and pulled back onto the road.

It was dark when they got back to the base. Most people had gone for the night, cars gone from the parking lot with the exception of the officers who were working overnight. Plus Steve’s and Carrillo’s. Both of them got out of the car, and they fell into stride next to each other. Steve spared a few brief glances at Carrillo, never managing to catch the man when he was looking over at Steve. They filed through the door one right after the other, and while Steve had fully intended to simply swipe his things out of his desk drawer then leave, he found himself collapsing into his chair instead.

It wasn’t until Carrillo walked off and shut his office door behind him that Steve realized how empty the base was. The few officers who were still working were out on the streets for the night, meaning that it was just Steve and Carrillo. Steve couldn’t remember the last time the place had been so quiet. Usually when he was here this late it’s because everyone was there and hustling. The stillness felt strange. As much as he wanted to get home, he couldn’t manage to force himself back up out of his seat.

He reached up to run his hands over his face and back through his hair, stopping as he winced at the pull against the injury on his arm. It was going to be annoying even if it wasn’t debilitating. He propped the elbow of his good arm on top of his desk, dropping his forehead heavily into the heel of his palm.

His eyes were still closed when he heard the sound of boots on the floor behind him. Turning around, he saw Carrillo standing there staring at him. He sighed, “What?”

“You’re still here,” Carrillo’s brows drew together.

Steve’s laugh was sarcastic as he forced himself up from his desk, landing them only inches apart, the energy markedly different now than it had been before, “And you’re still a fucking detective.”

He frowned, “Steve—”

His expression twisted at the sound of Carrillo using his name so easily, like there was real concern existing somewhere in the space between them, “Don’t,” he cut him off, harsh, quiet, “Don’t do that.”

“Don’t do wh—”

“Act like,” he gestured vaguely with his good arm, “Act like we’re friends, like you have advice for me, or like you even really give a shit what’s going on with me. You don’t. You made that perfectly fuckin’ clear today,” Steve saw the look on the colonel’s face and scoffed, “I didn’t forget what you said.”

Despite it all, Steve still wasn’t brave enough to say what he really wanted to say, which was something along the lines of, “I know what happened earlier doesn’t mean that you care. And it sure as hell doesn’t mean that we’re good now.” He knew that there was no way that the colonel had gone that soft that quickly. Steve knew that there was no way that he was the first questionable decision that Carrillo had made.

“It doesn’t really matter to you if I care” Carrillo snapped, voice quiet but sharp, “We’re not different in that. So don’t stand here and act like I hurt your feelings, like you’re a victim.”

Steve huffed, shaking his head and fighting the urge to roll his eyes, “I’m not sayin’ I’m a fuckin—” he cut himself off, deciding it wasn’t worth the fight, “Fuck this,” he bypassed Carrillo, brushing harder against the man’s shoulder than necessary, “I’m going home.”

Before Steve got too far, Carrillo reached out and grabbed his arm, this time his fingers wrapped directly around the bloody bandages, “Murphy.”

Steve hissed at the sensation, yanking his arm away to try and alleviate the sting as he whipped around to face Carrillo, “What?”

Carrillo looked at him for a moment, the anger in his eyes looking so familiar but it was missing something that had been there earlier. Maybe the exhaustion finally got the better of him, maybe Carrillo was putting too much thought into all of it because of how the day had unfolded. Steve’s jaw was clenched tight as he waited for the man to say something. It didn’t take much for him to see how Carrillo was overthinking whatever it was that he wanted to say.

After a few more long seconds of silence, Steve scoffed, and shook his head, “Nothing’s changed. Some things really are that simple, Colonel. Hate to break it to you.”

“No, you don’t,” the retort came automatically.

Steve’s lips pulled down into a pensive frown for a moment as he started to turn back around again, “Go home, Carrillo. We’ve got another day of this shit tomorrow.”

[darthkruge]

hello lovely!! i’ve been getting back into star wars lately and i’ve been loving your fics!! and i was wondering if i could make a request?? sort of like,, anakin but he doesn’t turn to the dark side type thing?? like he maybe confesses he’s scared to lose you and you help him through it?? maybe obi wan helps out?? honestly you can take it however you want :)) ty ty

anakin skywalker x reader || rewritten

summary || a rots fix it fic where i take many liberties and give anakin a support system + everyone gets better communication and we think about how it would perhaps end differently

warnings || hella canon divergence, angst w/ a happy ending, some violence (non graphic and not super described)

words || 5.1k (i am legit shocked)

a/n || hello and thank you!! i’m so glad you’ve been loving my fics! this fic was honestly super challenging for me and it ended up being the longest thing i’ve ever written. i made some big changes and lots of smaller ones, but each one was fully intentional. i really, really hope y’all like it <3

main masterlist || anakin masterlist 

gif credit

-----

Anakin awoke with a start, chest heaving and covered in sweat. He was gripping the blankets as he tried to ground himself, frantically looking around as if to discern between reality and the horrid dreamscape his mind created. He whipped his head to the side, visibly relaxing as he saw you staring up at him, a confused look on your face. 

You were no stranger to Anakin’s nightmares but this one seemed unlike any he’d ever had. You slept curled into him and, thus, his jolt caused one of your own. Unsure if he wanted your touch just yet, you reached out to him with the Force. Panic, loss, grief, fear, terror, insecurity. You looked into his eyes, watching as they slowly cleared and he registered your presence. He blinked quickly, trying to clear the tears from his vision and gave you a slight nod. 

Reaching a tentative hand to his shoulder, you suppressed a gasp as you felt him shudder beneath you. You quietly whispered his name and placed a finger under his jaw, guiding his face to yours. You nodded back at him and opened your arms in silent invitation. He crawled into your embrace as you pulled him impossibly close to you, situating yourself against the headboard so you could better wrap yourself around his shaking body. Choked sobs erupted from his lips, each one tearing a hole in your heart. As he finally let himself cry with his face buried into your neck, you held him. By the Maker, you held him. 

He didn’t want to speak just yet and you understood. You’ve always extended the same respect back to him as he gives to you. Tucked into you, Anakin’s fingers squeezed into your flesh, as if trying to remind himself you were solid. You placed a few kisses into his soft hair and onto his forehead, hands running up and down his arms and back. You physically pressed reminders of your love into his skin for hours and, somewhere in the midst of your embrace, he let himself fall into a state of limbo. Unawake, unasleep, umoving, yet feeling everything you had to offer. 

----

When morning came, you reached out once again. The emotions from last night were still evident, just not as strong. Simultaneously, you allowed a small smile to come to you as you felt something new. Warmth, comfort, love. You ran your fingers through Anakin’s hair to pull him to consciousness, needing to see his eyes. Stars, his eyes. While they were absolutely gorgeous, they also always gave him away. You once told him that. “Only for you, my love.” He’d replied. 

“Hi.” He croaked out, meeting your gaze. Your eyes fluttered closed for a second as you took a deep breath in relief. His eyes were clear. You didn’t know how long the shadows would be banished for, but as long as they weren’t constant, you had hope. 

“Hi, baby.” You whispered, allowing yourself to give him another forehead kiss, made easy by your position that you’d somehow remained in throughout the night. You looked at him expectantly and knew he knew what you were asking.

“You… you died,” Anakin started. His eyes were already filling with tears. “It wasn’t clear. There was so much blood. And you kept begging me to help you. You screamed and screamed and screamed and you were in agony and…” 

You took his hand in yours, squeezing his fingers in encouragement to go on.

“I never- I never came for you.” He spit the words out as if they were venomous and shook his head. You could hear the self-hatred in his words, the way he couldn’t grasp the concept of hurting you, ever, and yet how seriously he took this. 

“Hey, hey. Stop, my love.” You said, hoping to pull him out of his spiral. “You would never harm me, Anakin. You would come for me, you always have. That was a horrible dream and I’m so sorry you had to experience it. But it was just a dream, Anakin. It’s not real.” 

He pulled away from you as if he couldn’t stand to feel your gentle touch. “No, no, no! It-” His words were cut off by his uneven breathing, his pulse racing as he relived the nightmare. “It felt like the ones I had about my mother. It felt… prophetic. I’m scared, Y/N, I can’t lose you.” 

You walked over to him, placing your hands on his cheeks and rubbing your thumbs over his cheekbones, hoping to calm him. “You won’t. It takes a lot to kill me, you know? Especially when I have you by my side.” 

Anakin nodded but you could tell he was unconvinced. 

“How about you talk to Obi-Wan about the dreams? He’s always helped you before.” You suggested. 

While normally this would be unthinkable, as it would expose your relationship, Anakin felt himself pulled toward the choice. Inwardly, he admitted that he could definitely use a friend right now. And Obi-Wan had always stood by him. Somehow, he just knew that now would be no different.  

------

Obi-Wan easily swung the door open with the Force before Anakin even had a chance to knock. He knew his former Padawan’s force signature like the back of his hand and had sensed his distress for days. Unbeknownst to Anakin, Obi-Wan had canceled his missions due to this, wanting to stay close for when Anakin eventually came to him for guidance. 

Obi-Wan looked up from his paperwork as he realized Anakin refused to come closer. Huddled behind the door frame, a conflicted and fearful look on his face, Obi-Wan was struck by how similar Anakin looked to the little boy he’d found on Tatooine all those years ago. Many nights, young Anakin would come into Obi-Wan’s room, plagued with nightmares. Just as before, Obi-Wan never turned him away. 

“Something’s troubling you.” 

Anakin sighed, taking a tentative step forward. “You know Master L/N?”

Obi-Wan smiled knowingly, having a sense of where this is going. “Yes, of course. A brilliant strategist, much like yourself.” 

“I…. I’m involved with them, Master.” 

“Involved?” Obi-Wan replied, with a quirked eyebrow.

“Please don’t punish Y/N for this, I know the Council frowns upon relationships. If you need to report it, I understand. But just report me, say they had nothing to do with it. But before you do anything please, Master, listen to what I must tell you. I wouldn’t unless it was absolutely necessary.” Anakin pleaded. 

“Anakin, I know.” 

“Yeah, I mean it truly is necessary-” 

Obi-Wan placed a comforting hand on the younger Jedi’s shoulder. “You misunderstand. I mean, I know.” 

Anakin’s eyes widened with realization before confusion filtered into his gaze. “But we were so careful!” 

“Not as much as you would think,” Obi-Wan said with a slight laugh.

“And you’re not upset?”

He sighed. “Being honest, I was a bit at first. Anakin, you know the rules and you can be so reckless at times! But how could I fault you for your own humanity? And I knew who you were when I met you. I was always aware of your compassion, your capacity for emotions.” Anakin nodded and smiled, but the faraway look in his eye never wavered. 

Clearing his voice, Obi-Wan continued. “Are you alright, Anakin?” 

“No.” The strength of the word shocked them both and caused Anakin to take a moment to compose himself. “They’re dying.”

Panic flashed through Obi-Wan’s expression. “They’re what? What happened? Was it a mission? Do the medics know? Is-” 

“- No, nothing… nothing yet. But it will.” While Obi-Wan didn’t exactly understand, he could tell through Anakin’s tone that his former Padawan believed this with his entire soul. 

“I’ve been having more nightmares.” Anakin said. 

“Like the ones with your mother?” 

Anakin nodded, his gaze muddled as his mind wove through every possibility on how to save you. Coming up with none, he looked up quickly, the lost confusion clear. 

“It’s going to be alright, Anakin. We’re going to do this together.” Obi-Wan offered, trying to comfort his friend. When Anakin nodded this time, his expression had more hope in it. Obi-Wan returned the gesture, tipping his head as Anakin walked out. Before Anakin reached the door, Obi-Wan called his name. 

“Talk to me if you feel troubled. About anything, my friend. And just know… it’s okay to feel afraid. And you’re no less a Jedi because you love them. At least, not in my eyes.” For the first time since he’d walked in the room, Anakin gave a true smile. His former Master inhaled deeply, realizing after hearing those words, Anakin looked more like himself than he had in a long while. 

----- 

A few hours and a Council meeting later, Anakin walked back into your chambers, closing the door with a huff. He wasn’t enraged, per se, but definitely conflicted. You approached him cautiously, heart falling when you saw those familiar clouds back in his eyes. 

“Did Obi-Wan not take it well?”

Anakin shook his head. “It’s not… he was supportive. But the Council has assigned something to me and…” He trailed off and looked at you. Only then did you see his bloodshot, puffy eyes. 

“What did they ask of you, Anakin?” You questioned, coming behind him to gently massage his tense shoulders. 

“I’m needed to spy on the Chancellor. Apparently there’s a Sith Lord somewhere in the Order. They suspect him.” He tried to keep his voice strong, but you could see how torn apart he was by the inflection in his tone. 

You took a breath and tried to process the information. “Will you do it?”

“I don’t know… if the Council tells me I must, then I must. But the Chancellor has only been good to me. I worry about betraying him but I don’t want to let down the Order. I’m not sure how to do this without causing someone harm.” He confessed. 

“They shouldn’t have put you in this position, it’s unfair. And you don’t have to, Ani. I know it feels like you do but you don’t need to bend to each of the Council’s requests. Whatever the fallout, whatever you choose, please know that I’m with you. And so is Obi-Wan. Not that it fixes anything, but at the very least, you’ll always have us.” 

Anakin turned around so he was facing you. “I don’t know what to do.” He whispered, voice laced with hopelessness. 

“Trust yourself. You have a good heart, intelligence, and strong morals. They’ve never failed you before.”

He nodded before leaning into you and your arms instinctively wrapped around him. Your fingertips found their way to his hair, gently weaving through the golden strands. 

“We’ll get through this, yeah?” While it was a question, you both knew you meant it as a statement.

“We’ll get through this.” Anakin echoed. He mumbled the words into your neck where he had buried his face. As if the words could seep into your skin. As if the hope could find its way to your heart and stay there, ever protected, ever true. 

-----

The next day, Anakin found himself in Palpatine’s office. He was wary, guarded. It was evident by the look on his eyes, the way he took a moment before taking another step. It was his training as both a Jedi and a General that allowed him to do this. The careful complexity of planning every move. 

“I heard the Council debating whether or not they should have made you a Master. It seems they do not trust you or value your talent as they should.” Palpatine’s words made Anakin freeze. Rationally, he knew this was wrong. At the very least, Obi-Wan trusts him and so do you. But there was a part of him that felt so validated by the Chancellor’s words that he wanted to hear more. To bask in them, in feeling wanted and appreciated. He hated himself for it. 

“I… I’m not sure what you mean by this.” Anakin attempted not to give himself away any more than he already has. 

“Well, they care about your potential. But they hold you back. They’ll never show you your true power, for they don’t want you to understand. They just wish to use it, no matter your own fate.” 

“I feel cast aside. Like I don’t matter.” Anakin wasn’t even sure why he shared these words. Somehow, in feeling so praised, the doubts just bubbled their way to the surface. He felt like a child in these moments, so painfully fragile. 

“You don’t. Not to them, Anakin. But with me I can teach you your power. I can teach you the ways of the Dark Side. I know of your fears, of those nightmares that plague you. I know about your secret marriage and how close you are to losing it all.” 

Anakin froze, his heart hammering in his chest. His thoughts raced as he tried to piece together the truth from all the lies. The mentions of Darth Plagueis. The Dark Side of the Force. 

“You’re the Sith Lord!” Anakin said, igniting his lightsaber and pointing it at the older man’s chest. 

Palpatine bowed his head slightly, a small smile gracing his lips. “Well done, my boy.” Anakin felt sick as he noted the pride in his tone. And yet that aching part inside him still swelled, ever so slightly.

“Now, don’t do anything rash.” The Chancellor reasoned. “Only the Dark Side can save the one you love.” 

Anakin wanted to do the right thing. He wished to be the one who could stand up and arrest Palpatine without a single ounce of guilt or regret. But as soon as Palpatine mentioned you, it’s like all his logic disappeared. He just wanted to save you, to not fail you as he’d failed his mother. But then he thought back to your words. “Strong morals.” And to his Master’s. “We’ll do this together.”

“I’m turning you into the Council.” 

“Wouldn’t you prefer to kill me?”

“Yes.” Anakin’s remark was forceful and clipped with anger.

“Then do it. Give yourself over to your wrath.”

He felt himself burning with betrayal, with resentment toward both sides. Even so, he could still tell right from wrong, selfless from selfish. And whatever Palpatine was doing… it certainly did not have the will of the people in mind. Without so much as deigning him with another response, Anakin turned and walked out of the room.

“If you turn me in, you’ll never save them!” Anakin tried to will Palpatine’s voice out of his head as he ventured back to the Council chambers. When he arrived back, he decided to slightly alter his plans. While he knew he must face all of them eventually, he wanted to talk to Obi-Wan first. Perhaps his Master could give him guidance, like he did about your nightmares. 

“General Skywalker… are you alright?” Anakin stumbled as he walked right into another figure, too caught up in his own head.

“I’m fine, Master Windu. Thank you- I’m sorry.” Mace looked at the younger Jedi with an unreadable expression. While there was much in his eyes, concern was definitely a part of it. 

“Have you seen Master Kenobi?” Anakin said after a brief pause for composure. 

“He’s supposed to leave for his next mission any moment now. If you hurry, you can probably still catch him.” 

Anakin thanked Master Windu before taking off in a run. No matter how fast his legs carried him, he felt his mind was working even faster, the internal conflict brewing more intently by the second. 

-----

Obi-Wan opened the door as soon as before Anakin could even knock. He looked at Anakin and gestured at a vacant chair, a silent invitation to sit. Anakin shook his head quickly. The younger Jedi’s eyes were scattered and conflicted, as if he’d been shaken to his very core. 

“Palpatine is the Sith Lord.” The words came out rushed, yet clear. As if Anakin needed to get them out as quickly as he could but replayed them in his head until they were all he knew. The intensity showed Obi-Wan that there was no doubt in his friend’s mind. 

Obi-Wan blinked. “Okay.” He stroked his beard, trying to find the words to say. “Are you alright?”

Anakin looked at Obi-Wan in confusion. Certainly there were more important questions his former Master would want to ask than that. 

“I know you and the Chancellor were close. This can’t be easy for you. I just wanted to ask if you were alright.” 

“I’m not sure.” Anakin said after some hesitation. “I don’t really know what to think… Palpatine is evil, right? But he believed in me when no one else did. He saw my potential, allowed me to confide in him. He told me he could show me how to save Y/N. Would someone evil do that?” 

Obi-Wan’s eyes softened as he looked at the painfully conflicted young man in front of him. “Anakin… he was manipulating you. He was isolating you so you had no one to turn to but him. It was a tactic, a ploy. He doesn’t care for you.” Anakin looked so heartbroken that Obi-Wan knew Anakin believed him. “I’m so sorry.” 

“But what about Y/N?” Anakin asked desperately.

Obi-Wan sighed. “Loving someone in the Order isn’t easy. Especially after everything you’ve gone through. And losing someone… it changes the way you love. You fear constantly, wondering when your love will evade you. When it will fall apart, like all the rest. But living like that, loving like that… it leaves no room for growth or peace. And that’s what relationships are for, aren’t they?” His voice was filled with compassion and wisdom. From experience, perhaps? Regardless of the reason, Anakin was reminded that someone did understand him. Despite the circumstances, he felt content. At least a bit. 

“Is there any way to save them?”

“I’m not sure. Let’s focus on Palpatine for now, alright? And we’ll bring Master L/N with us so you know they’re safe.” Obi-Wan wished nothing more than having a set solution to save Y/N. But some things were even out of his grasp. “I know this must be impossible for you, Anakin. I truly am sorry.” 

Anakin nodded. After all, it was true. If there was anything to describe the impending threat of losing another person he loved, impossible summed up the process. “I know. You’re doing all you can. Thank you, Master. And yes, I would like to bring them with us.” 

Obi-Wan clasped a hand to Anakin’s shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze as they met each other with a smile. “I’ll send them a message right now.”

----

You gasped when you received Obi-Wan’s message with the details of the Supreme Chancellor’s truth. Your heart cried for Anakin, knowing the betrayal must be breaking him. All you could do was wish that with Obi-Wan’s help, the two of you could support Anakin until he felt like he could breathe again. And you had faith in him. You always had faith in him. 

Grabbing your cloak, you jogged to Obi-Wan’s quarters. As soon as you opened the door, you ran to Anakin and hugged him to you, needing to feel his presence. Somehow, you knew he needed it, too. 

“Ready?” Anakin and Obi-Wan gave you nods of confirmation and you gave a tentative smile. “Alright. Let’s do this.” 

-----

Anakin entered Palpatine’s chambers first. For once, he felt sure of himself. He finally knew what he had to do. His gaze shifted to you, making sure you were alright. You placed a hand on his arm, rubbing your thumb up and down to reassure him. He inhaled. Exhaled. And ignited his saber. 

“I knew you’d come back, Skywalker. I knew you’d join me.” 

“Think again.” Obi-Wan responded as you and him walked into the chambers. Pure, unfiltered rage flickered through Palpatine’s eyes in response.

“Anakin, they’re trying to corrupt you. They’re trying to keep your power. Come with me, boy, and I’ll teach you all you wish to know. I’ll teach you how to save them.” He said, pointing a pale finger toward your face. 

You let out a sharp breath as you suddenly understood Anakin’s conflict. Of course Palpatine was using you as a bargaining chip. Using Anakin’s fear of abandonment, of losing his loved ones against him. It was disgusting, even for a Sith. 

“I… you can’t possibly know how to do that. It’s impossible!” 

“Not on the Dark Side. Look… Obi-Wan has turned them against you. He’s the cause of this! I’m sure he didn’t even pose a solution to saving Y/N. It’s because he doesn’t care about you, not like I do.” 

The shadows returned to Anakin’s eyes as his gaze switched between Obi-Wan and Palpatine. He couldn’t even bring himself to look at you, to see the pain in your eyes as he struggled with a choice that for others would be so simple. He hated himself for being weak but he truly couldn’t fathom losing you. 

Obi-Wan stepped forward, backing Palpatine against the wall and pointing his lightsaber at Palpatine’s throat. Anakin stepped back, too frozen to move, and unconsciously placed himself between them and you.

“It’s over, Chancellor. Don’t make this more difficult than it already is.” Obi-Wan said.

Palpatine shot lightning from his hands, causing Obi-Wan to deflect the matter with his lightsaber, redirecting it to Palpatine himself. As Palpatine shook from the force of his own blast, he once again called to Anakin.

“If you let him kill me, dear boy, Y/N will die. If you don’t try to save them, you will be the cause of their death.” 

Anakin’s eyes widened, those words hitting him right in the chest. He moved forward, pointing his lightsaber at Obi-Wan but refusing to make the final cut to end his life. Obi-Wan looked like he wanted to speak but the effort of holding of Palpatine’s lightning rendered him useless. It was Obi-Wan, after all. His former Master, his friend. The one person who he trusted with the secret of his marriage. He couldn’t kill him, right? He faltered, stepping slightly back. 

“Ani,” You said, your voice calm as you tried to reason with him. “Ani if you do this, you can’t come back from it. I know you don’t want to lose me and if you kill Obi-Wan, you will, regardless of the fate of my life. You aren’t too far gone, yet. You haven’t done anything irredeemable. Remember who you are, my love.” 

Anakin heard your words and looked at your face. You. He wanted to do good by you, to do good by all of them. He wanted to make his mother proud, make himself feel like leaving her for the Jedi Order meant something. And then his gaze filtered over to his friend. Obi-Wan stood tall against the force of Palpatine’s lightning, reminding Anakin of his friend’s strength. It was something Anakin wanted to emulate, too. 

Understanding his choice, Anakin took a step forward to position the blade toward Palpatine’s chest. His hand was shaking, movements unsure, eyes glossed over with immeasurable pain. But before he could make contact, you swiftly moved in front of him and killed Palpatine instead. Obi-Wan was thrust backward as the lightning ceased, chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. 

“Why would you do that?” Anakin asked as he looked at you. 

“I didn’t want you to have to kill your friend. No matter what he turned out to be.” You said as you shifted on the balls of your feet. The weight of Palpatine’s death now weighed on your soul, as do those of every life you’ve ever ended. You could bear it and you knew Anakin was strong enough to do so, as well. You just didn’t want him to have to. 

Anakin nodded and whispered a thank you back to you. You just smiled, the love for him clear in your expression. Anakin turned around, walking to his friend and extending a hand for him. 

“I never doubted you.” Obi-Wan said simply as he met Anakin’s guilty eyes. 

“I should have made the choice to believe you earlier. I shouldn’t have let him get to me. I’m sorry, Master.” 

“Look at me, Anakin. We all struggle with our morals. We struggle and we’re unsure and we pray and hope to land on the right decision. And you did. You have nothing to apologize for.” Looking at your and Anakin’s arms around each other, Obi-Wan made one last decision. “How about the two of you retire for the evening? I’ll debrief with the Council, you’ve been through enough.” 

Once again, Anakin was struck by the older Jedi’s strength and selflessness. He nodded, as did you, before he accompanied you back to your quarters. 

----

You kept one arm around Anakin’s waist the entire way home, mirroring his that was around your shoulders. You couldn’t bear to separate, not after the events of the past few days. Seeing Anakin so torn up inside, it was eating away at you. Knowing you couldn’t save him was one of the hardest things you’ve ever had to deal with. 

Now, Palpatine was finally gone. There was no more threat to the Jedi Order, the Force once again balanced. But both of you still understood the one solution that hadn't been found: how to save you. It made everything easier, that you chose to kill the Chancellor. Anakin refused to voice the doubts in his head, wondering if he actually would have gone through with it knowing he would lose his chance at saving you. 

The air was melancholic surrounding you both. Heavy. Neither of you knew what to say, words failing in a moment that was so conflicted it almost overwhelmed you. But your heart warmed as you saw Anakin scamper in front of you to open and hold the door for you. You loved him so much, for doing the little things even in moments like these. It gave you hope.

You were okay with death, so long as it only affected you. When you joined the Jedi, you had to make your peace with it. But after you fell in love everything changed. You didn’t want Anakin to go through the pain of losing you. He’d been so open with you about, well, everything. Especially his past. He’d gone through so much, felt such raw pain and loss, you didn’t want to add to that. 

Taking his hands in yours, you looked into his blue eyes. 

“I don’t want you to die.” He whispered, the desperate, deflated tone making your heart break. “I won’t.” You wished to say, but you knew you couldn’t. 

“I don’t want to die, either.” You chose these words instead, relying on their honesty. 

“Palpatine could have saved you.” Anakin said after a beat. 

You sighed. “You don’t know that.” You stated, knowing it wouldn’t change how he felt. 

“Neither do you!” 

“But at what cost? At the cost of losing your soul? Anakin, you would have had to join the Sith! That’s no longer you! You’re good and you couldn’t have saved me if you were there, don’t you see that?” You pleaded. You wished he would see your logic, the truth behind your words. How even though he thought otherwise, he made the right decision. 

“What good is saving the Order if you won’t be a part of it?”

“What good is saving my life if I wouldn’t have you to live it with?” You countered. 

Anakin let out an exhausted breath before pulling you into him, hugging you. The fighting was too much and, frankly, he didn’t want to argue. Not with you, not ever. You both let out a humorless chuckle as you leaned into each other. 

“I love you.” His tone conveyed it all. 

“I love you.” You replied, your voice muffled from being pressed into his robes. 

“Can we sleep? I don’t want to face this right now. Can we just put this aside, if just for a moment? Can I lay with you and can you hold me and can we just have each other?” You questioned breathlessly.

“I would like nothing more, my love.” He smiled slightly and pressed a kiss to your head as he added the words of endearment, wanting you to understand he wasn’t upset with you. You already knew that, though. You were in love with Anakin Skywalker. Of course you’d argue from time to time. But at the end of the day, you were two hopelessly in love Jedi just trying to save each other. 

Crawling into bed, sleep came for the both of you quickly. You were holding him and he was holding you, tangled together as you nestled his warm embrace. He tucked his face into your neck as you did so and savored the feel of you next to him. Safe. 

Drifting off, Anakin tried to fight the pull of sleep, knowing he’d just suffer from another nightmare like he had every day since the first one. One where you’d die and he could do nothing to stop it. Amidst these tumultuous thoughts, his breathing evened, lulling him under. 

You were in the grass, a flower crown atop your head. Anakin was leaning against a small house. It was quaint but beautiful. Small, not outwardly flashy, but full of love and meaning. Looking around, he smiled as he saw green vines crawling up the sides of the house, a garden of your favorite flowers out front. You always had a soft spot for that. 

We are on Naboo, he realized. It was peaceful. It was the dream you always talked of together. Anakin’s breath caught as he felt the certainty of this dream. It felt just like his nightmares, except this one left him content. He didn’t want to entertain the thought for too long, afraid of jinxing it. But he knew it was prophetic. He wasn’t sure how he changed his fate, what exactly gave him this future. Something inside him just knew that when he wakes up the next morning, all will be okay. He felt infinitely lighter as he understood the threat was gone. 

When you looked up and saw him, you raced toward him and jumped into his arms. Anakin stumbled but caught you, breathing in your scent as you kissed the side of his neck. As he held you, his thoughts slightly wandered. But he was grounded by your presence, reminding him that you were safe and he was okay. With you, he was finally, completely, home.

-----

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[snvngkwan]

old friend — i forgive you (written)

after putting the towel away you look at the clock, 6:32 pm, ‘great that gives me enough time to mentally prepare’ (like you weren’t attempting to do that the moment you woke up-) you turn around to find sunghoon staring at you like he’s some type of fucking predator

“what the actual fuck hoon don’t do that” you say putting your hand above your heart “i thought you were like a robber or something”

“if someone wanted to rob this place they have different things to think about” he says getting off the wall and walking towards you. watching him walk towards you made your realize how cute he really was. you always thought he was attractive but he really looks cute right now. “you’re worried about your talk with sunoo aren’t you”

“how’d you know about that i didn’t tell you” you question

“he’s my friend. he came screaming in the chat the moment you said ‘hey’” he chuckled “plus going on twitter and thinking back to the group chat you made it wasn’t too hard to put it together”

you didn’t really know what to say to that. i mean it’s not shocking that sunoo told his friends but it still somehow only made you more nervous. maybe because of riki.

“i wouldn’t sweat it to much. he’s very excited to see you and he really just wants to get on better terms with you” he says while patting your shoulder.

“you’re more comforting than i thought sunghoon” you say after sighing deeply “it’s all kind of confusing. it doesn’t sound real”

“yeah i get that. when we heard the whole story we were shocked too. i don’t blame you for ignoring him for so long." you didn’t know what to say to that so you just nodded your head. you didn’t realize it was already 7 until you heard the door.

“hello how may-“ you stop short once you realize who you’re talking to, “sunoo, hi”

“hi y/n” he breaths out. you never really gotten a good look at him before. he looks different but also the same. you can tell it’s the same child you were best friends with but he looks more mature now. handsomer too. “are you off your shift now or”

“oh yeah i am lemme just get my stuff” you say slightly panicked. ‘i cant even think straight’ you thought

after grabbing youre things you walk back to sunoo “ready?” he says

“yeah i am” you say taking another deep breath. you’ve been doing that a lot today “bye hoon you say walking to the door”

“bye y/n bye sunoo” he waves back. “did sunoo even talk to me??” he says when y’all are out the door.

it’s been about maybe 5 minutes since you guys started walking in the park and neither of you said a word. you felt like you shouldn’t have to say something first as he was the one who wanted to meet up in person so why wouldn’t he say anything? he also wanted to meet up on the coldest day this week. all you wanted to do after work was go home, wrap up in a blanket and binge some netflix but now you’re walking in the park with your old best friend who won’t speak. it’s getting pretty annoying at this point honestly. you wanted this to be done as soon as possible but he seems to want to drag this out.

“so” you finally say breaking the awkward (very,very awkward) silence. you then realize sunoo is the one who’s supposed to be apologizing so he definitely should’ve started. ‘i can’t just be like so that apology huh’ you think ‘that’s just rude’.

“i guess i should start huh” sunoo finally says. “i just,, i don’t know where to start you know” he sighs and rubs his hands together nervously

“it’s ok. take your time” please don’t.

“i well ok. i’m really sorry y/n. i know it was a misunderstanding and all but it still is fully my fault. i never made an effort to contact you myself and just listened to my mother without even giving it a second thought. i never thought that i should even contact you myself even if my mom said that you didn’t want to contact us. i truly am sorry y/n and i hope you can forgive me” sunoo finishes. you sit there taking in what sunoo just said. taking your time trying to process everything. thinking about everything that’s happened to lead up to this moment.

“i think” you start, “that you should be forgiven. it was a misunderstanding and you shouldn’t be held accountable now knowing what really happened so yes sunoo. i will forgive you” you finally breathe out and look him in the eye. he’s staring at you already with these big almost sparkling eyes like you just told him he won the lottery or something.

“really y/n. you mean it” he questions in a very rushed and excited manner.

“well yeah” you say finally looking away from his eyes “i wouldn’t have said it if i didn’t mean it” next thing you know, you’re being crushed in a giant hug.

“thank you thank you thank you” sunoo repeats while hugging the shit out of you.

“you’re welcome….i think” you say while awkwardly patting the arm he has around your neck. sunoo really wanted things to get back to normal and he wanted it right away.

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synopsis: when sunoo and y/n were kids, sunoo confessed to y/n only to disappear the next day. now years later, all y/n wants to do is get through school as easy as possible but when sunoo unexpectedly comes back how easy can it be?

a/n: i didnt know how to end this-

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[barnes-n-nobles]

Youre My Path (SMUT)

Yandere Bucky being crazy, possessive, and DARK!

TW-Mentions on non-con, drugging, stalking, and overall dark behavior. A little bit of knife play as well.

Smut SMUT SMUT

Let me know what y’all think 

Today was just another boring ordinary day. You had to go to the store and stock up on some groceries that you had been planning on getting but you lacked the will power to do so. You opened your phone and looked at the time. Ugh, I need to go before they close you thought to yourself as you managed to peel yourself off of your comfy sofa. You got ready and headed towards the nearest super market.

Lately youve been having some weird feelings, as if someone is constantly watching you. You always shake it off though, because nothing ever happens to you. You always get home safe and sound. Today was a little more intense though, as if you could almost hear someone breathing behind you when you were walking to the store. Relieved to have made it inside, you grabbed your cart and started your trip through the empty isles of the store. You loved and hated to come at night, it made you feel at peace knowing there there wouldn’t be annoying ass kids and angry moms yelling at them to behave. No people blocking the isles with their carts and most importantly, no need to run into someone you knew. The only reason you hated it, was because you didn’t want to get kidnapped and left for dead.

As you made your way to the bread isle, you had that feeling again. You felt like someone was behind you, you stopped dead in your tracks to see if anyone would walk past you. You pretended to look at the merchandise and you slowly turned around to see if there was anyone there. You looked both ways, and sure enough there was nothing. You rolled your eyes and kept it moving. As your trip started coming to an end you decided to stop by the makeup isle, needing a couple of items that you would use for your upcoming date.

Usually you didn’t try this hard but you figured you would give it a shot. All the past times you went on dates they would disappear after your first date. You weren’t sure if it was because you didn’t try hard enough or if they simply weren’t feeling your vibe. As your mind trailed off you accidentally ran into another person with your cart, completely snapping you out of your mind. A broad man, fell to his knee. “Oh my god!!! I’m so sorry. Are you ok? God I’m so clumsy please forgive me” you said frantically as you started to help him up. He lifted his head up to meet your gaze, big blue eyes % bore%% into your own. Your eyes started to trail from his eyes, to his lips, and up again to his perfectly sculpted face. You were mesmerized, you had never seen such a handsome man. “It’s okay, don’t worry about it, y/n” he said quickly getting up and walking off with a visible smirk on his face. You scrunched your eyebrows in confusion, knowing damn well he did not just say your name. You werent exactly sure if your mind was playing tricks on you or if he really said what you think he had said. You got up quickly, still in shock but hoping that it was really your mind playing tricks on you. Hesitantly you continued to shop, even though there was a little voice in your head telling you to get the hell out of that store.

Bucky POV

FUCK she’s so beautiful, he thought to himself. The way you stared at him, it was clear you wanted him the way he wanted you. This was the moment that he had been waiting for ever since he laid eyes on you. He had never been this close to you, it was like a dream come true. You smelled like candy, your beautiful e/c eyes meeting his. Just how he had imagined but better. The way you apologized made him hard. Just think of how submissive my y/n will be to me mmmm I’m going to devour her in every way possible he thought to himself, smirking.

Bucky ran into you at a coffee shop near your house. It was love at first sight for him. He watched you interact with your friends, smile, laugh, and it was like a match made in heaven for him. He knew he needed you to smile for him, laugh for him, and live for him. He followed you home that night. Making sure you wanted to be safe, of course. But his monthly visits turned to weekly and then turned to daily. He eventually managed to get into your home. You left a space key under your mat, and he felt so happy yet disappointed that you would endanger yourself like that. “When we live together, I’ll make sure you don’t make silly mistakes like this” he said to himself as he got into your home.

He went through your house just browsing, seeing if anything interesting caught his eye. He then made it into your room and continued to look through your things. He found your panties next to your bed and quickly grabbed them and put him in his picked for him to enjoy later. He also took some pictures of you, to also enjoy later.

You were his new routine and he enjoyed every second of it. As time went on he would keep tabs on you, absolutely hating it when you went on dates. He was consumed with jealousy and couldn’t believe anyone would dare lay a finger on you. He knew that this would not fly and he had to make sure to get rid of any roadblocks that got in his way. Bucky murdered them and everytime he did he felt relieved, almost happy knowing that he was that much closer to you.

After his encounter with you, Bucky walked off into the parking lot, one car over from yours, slipping into the drivers seat. His mind started to go wild. He needed you so badly. He wished he could have taken you right then and there. How he wished he could be inside you, your soft moans begging him to make you feel good. His cock soon started to throb at the thought of you. He leaned back in his seat taking a pair of your panties out from his pocket. He brought them to his nose and inhaled deeply, moaning as he exhaled. “Fuck Y/n...you make me so horny...I’m going to fuck the shit out of you when you’re here baby just you wait”.

Wasnt long before he pulled out his dick, stroking it hard. His hips bucking into his hand wishing it was your pussy. He started to think about how beautiful your pretty mouth would be around his dick, how good your tongue would feel swiveling around his tip. Just as he was about to cum, he stopped. He growled and threw his head back lowly moaning your name. “Fuck...I cant take this anymore. I need her” He quickly tucked himself back in and relaxed.

All you could think about was how that guy knew your name. It kept replaying in your head and it didn’t make sense. You headed to your car and started to load everything in. “Hello my Y/n” you heard someone say in a low deep voice. You quickly turned around, your heart starting to beat a little faster. “Umm. Do I know you?” You asked. Bucky sighed and started to walk towards you. “Not yet doll but you will” a smirk on his face once again. You backed up as he took steps forward. “Don’t come any closer, or I’m calling the police”.

Bucky pressed himself against your body, his hands snaking their way to your hips. His face now pressed against your neck. “No you wont Princess, I know you like this. I can tell by the way that you’re breathing that you want me to keep going” his low voice going straight to your core. “N-no please...stop I ..” you tried pushing him off but you started to feel so weak. You had not noticed that Bucky had used something to drug you. All you felt was your body going limp and you falling into his arms.

Bucky smiled as you fell into him, placing a soft kiss on your temple. He noticed that someone was coming over so he quickly pressed your body to your car, and grabbed your face, kissing you. The person walking, walked a little faster as they were feeling a little awkward. Perfect he thought to himself. He placed you into the back to his car, resting your head to a pillow he had just bought and covering you with his sweater. He quickly drove off, leaving all your things by your car.

Your eyes opened, your head pounding. Wherever you were it was dark but comfortable. You groaned as you started to fully wake up, slowly sitting up. Your left hand felt heavy, you tried pulling it and you heard a chain. You yanked your hand hard again, making a loud sound. Bucky heard the noise coming from your guy’s room and he smiled and quickly got up making his way to you.

“Baby you’re awake now” Bucky excitedly said

“What’s going on..why are you doing this to me, where am I?”

“You’re home doll, with me”

“But I don’t know you” you cried softly

“My name is James Buchanan Barnes, but you can call me Bucky. I’ve been looking after you for a while now and it’s been a pleasure but I'm so glad that I finally have you all to myself, just how it was always meant to be”

He started to get on the bed climbing towards you. You backed up as he came towards you, your back was now against the wall, pinning yourself between the cold wall and his broad body. His hand going to the back of your neck, bringing you close to him, your lips almost touching his.

“I’ve waited a life time for this, to have you here with me. You make me crazy and I would sacrifice the world for you. Now that you’re all mine, I won’t ever loose you” he closed the gap between you two, his lips desperately locking into yours. Kissing you passionately, he was hungry and desperate. You turned your head to the side, breaking the kiss.

“This isn’t the way Bucky, this isn’t right. You need to let me go” you begged. Bucky smiled and looked down moving back away from you. It made you feel relieved that he was not too mad due to your actions. He slowly got up from the bed and went over to his dresser, rummaging through some things.

“Bucky...maybe we are in different paths right now, maybe in the future we will be together but now right now, not like this...please Bucky listen to me”, hoping that he would have a little sympathy, you used his name to make it more personal.

“You know , y/n...just because you say we are on different paths doesn’t mean it’s true” he grabbed something and started to walk towards you again. This time his metal arm reached out to pull you by your leg to the edge of the bed, giving you whiplash. He quickly climbed on top of you, pinning your arms above your head with his metal arm and pulling out a syringe with his other hand.

You quickly started to wiggle around trying to get him off you. Shaking your head, “no no please stop no”. Buckys eyes had a hint of madness to them, dark and disturbing. “Don’t worry these don’t hurt, it will make you feel better I promise”. He quickly injected it to you and you soon started to feel get hot, with a tingling sensation “This will loosen you up a bit, it’ll make you relax so that we can enjoy eachother baby”

His lips made their way onto your neck, kissing and licking you all over. Your heart started to race, your eyes closing, soft moans escaping your lips, “n-no..” Bucky grunted as his erection started to press against your clothed pussy. His hips bucking forward, dry humping you. He lowered down to your ear, whispering, “ cant you see what you do to me. You’re so sexy and sensual you’re almost making me cum in my pants with your adorable moans, my love. As much as love to hear you right now, I want you to moan and scream my name y/n...begging me to fuck you harder”

All his words, combined with his dry humping made you soaking wet. As much as you hated this you couldn’t help but moan louder. His cock pressing against you was not enough and you needed more. You tried your hardest to resist, “G-get a..way f-from me..” you managed to choke out, trying to not moan anymore and trying to push him off with your body. Suddenly Bucky got angry. Hating how you were fighting him. He tore off your thin leggings in a fast single motion, revealing your soaked panties. He took out his knife and pressed it against you, earning a frantic gasp but you stopped moving. “Stop fighting me doll, for your own good because I swear I will fucking destroy you. I’ve waited too long for this, don’t push me because you won’t like the way I punish you.But......if you behave I’ll make sure to take care of you..real good care darling” he said as his knife traced your body. He grabbed your shirt roughly and ripped it off, slicing your bra open as well.

His mouth watered at the sight of your delicious breasts, making his cock twitch with excitement. His knife trailed down to your panties, making you whimper. “You’re so delicious kitten, I’m going to fuck you so hard. I cant wait till my cock is right in here” he motioned and tapped your clit with his knife. He roughly grabbed them and ripped them open instantly. He threw his knife to the side and quickly started to rub your clit making your back arch with your eyes closed. Your moans now filling up the room. Bucky smiled and took one of your nipples into his mouth, making you quiver and move your hips down into his hand. “Mmm, I knew you wanted this..wanted me...only me” he growled against your chest. “F-fuck Bucky...keep going please”. You hated yourself for saying that but you couldn’t help it, you were in pure ecstasy.

Just as you were about to reach your orgasm, he removed himself from you. Making you whine and buck your hips up, wanting and needing his touch once again. “Don’t worry kitten, I’m not done with you yet”. He quickly undressed and positioned himself at your entrance, rubbing his tip on your clit, making you mewl. “Tell me what you want doll...tell me what you want from me” he coaxed. You didn’t answer, as you were too embarrassed to say anything. His metal hand went to your neck, squeezing it hard. “Tell me y/n..tell me what you want NOW” he yelled, releasing his grip from your throat.

“Fuck me Bucky...please” you finally said. “I don’t think I heard you doll, say it loud and clear”. “FUCK ME BUCKY PLEASE I NEED YOU...PLEASE”. You finally broke. You needed him now, there was nothing in the world you wanted more than to have his cock inside of you, his lips on your skin and his hands all over you. You were finally filled with his big cock slipping in and out of your wet pussy. His hands on your neck, choking you but not too hard like before. His hips snapping in and out of you making your body shake. 

“Such an obedient slut, MY obedient slut. I’m going to break you and bend you to my will. Making you all mine. I’ll make you crave my touch, my attention, my voice. You’re going to live only for me, doll. Only for me” he growled as he pounded into you, rubbing your clit making you loose it. He then started to feel you reach your end, making him moan, “cum on my dick baby...cum for me. Let go” he cooed as he angled himself to reach into you deeper. That’s when you felt your orgasm hit you, your body started to shake, waves of pleasure surging through your body. “Mmm Buckyyyy” you moaned. Making him loose it as well, he coated your insides in his thick warm cum. Pumping himself in and out slowly. Gasping for air.

Fuck he was such a God, he made you want more of him. It was the first night and you were already going crazy for his touch. You wanted him to keep going keep doing you however he wanted, but most importantly to keep pleasuring you. Bucky finally pulled out and laid next to you, looking at your beautiful face. He brought his lips to yours and gave you a soft kiss. “The drug hasn’t worn off baby, don’t think this is over. We’re going until we cant no more, doll.” He said against your lips, flipping you over for round two.