#y/n funny
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Are they helping?
Valeria: Doing paperwork and looks at Y/N, who's on their computer and sees the dozens of stickers What're... all those for?
Y/N: To make me "positive"
Valeria: Are they working?
Y/N: No. Fuck off.
#valeria mw2#valeria garza x reader#valeria x reader#valeria cod#valeria garza#Valeria incorrect quotes#Valeria garza incorrect quotes#y/n funny#y/n incorrect quotes#y/n x character#starandcloud
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katsuki who breaks his sleep schedule ONLY on your birthday because he wants to be sure he’s the first one to text you.
at exactly midnight .on.the.dot. you get a string of messages from your boyfriend saying :
“happy birthday, moron.”
“i love you and all that stupid mushy shit”
“you better say it back. fucked up my sleep for you.”
“❤️”
he doesn’t even care if you’re already asleep, he’s already sure he was the very first one to text you but if you are still awake he’s even more proud cause you saw it happen. him who you (and his friends) tease all the time for going to sleep at like 8:30 sharp stayed up doing fuck all just to be the first to wish you a happy fucking birthday.
so yeah, you bet your ass he’s proud. and he’ll go to sleep and knock out immediately with a smirk on his face when you text him a “thank you sm, katsuki !!! i love you sosooososos much💕💕”
“yeah you better. go to bed, g’night <3”
n’ yeah okay, maybe he’ll be a bit crankier than usual, but it’ll be worth it seeing how bright you smile and jump to hug him, kissing all over his cheek with thank you’s and love you’s.
he’ll just take it out on kaminari.
#help this is so funny to me#hell keep doing it afterwards too#hes stupid very veru stupid#i lub him smuch#bakugou katsuki x reader#cash speaks <3#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugo fluff#bakugou imagine#cash is just talkin'#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou katsuki#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#katsuki x y/n#katsuki bakugou drabble#katsuki bakugou x female reader#katsuki bakugou x you#bakugou x fem!reader#bakugou x you#bakugou x y/n#def is dramatic too like#and here i am stayin up for you an shit.. this is how you thank me ?? fuckin cruel.. tsk tsk#I HATE HIM#I HATE HIM LEMME AT HIM
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This felt true to his character
For some reason
Adding the original image here cause I just painted on top of it lol😭😭
#i can't believe this is my first post in days😞#I NEED TO MAKE SOMETHING ACTUALLY PRETTY SOON BUT FOR NOW YOU GET FUNNY#T H E F U N N Y#papyrus#undertale#sunsest-art#undertale papyrus
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SMAU-PUMPKIN CARVING 🎃
(Gojo, Geto, Toji, Nanami, Choso)
Part 2 tmrw
Masterlist Discord
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk smau#jjksmau#jjk fake texts#jjk texts#jjk fluff#jjk crack#jjk#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#geto suguru#geto x reader#toji fushiguro#toji x reader#nanami kento#nanami x reader#choso kamo#choso x reader#jujutsu kaisen texts#jujutsu kaisen smau#jujutsu kaisen funny#jjk x y/n#jjk x you
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𝓈𝑒𝒸𝓇𝑒𝓉𝓈 𝓈𝓅𝒾𝓁𝓁𝑒𝒹.
megumi fushiguro one shot! ✮⋆˙🎱🕷️
╰┈➤ megumi x reader ��⁀➷
synopsis; megumi has been dating you in secret - but your relationship is exposed when a certain pink haired boy accidentally reveals your boyfriend.
ೄྀ ࿐ fluff, yuji being an adorable idiot 🤧 ˊˎ
Megumi has a tendency of falling asleep around you.
You didn't know why, but it seemed like every time you and him were laying together, he'd wrap his arms around you and nuzzle his face into the crook of your neck before falling into a deep slumber
You were in your dorm room, placing the book you'd been reading to him on your bedside table as you tilt your head to admire the boy in front of you
His hair - who he absolutely forbade everyone from touching - is ruffled from you running your fingers through the thick strands. He said your touch is different, gentle and pleasing - so he doesn't deny your puppy eyes when you question whether or not he'd like your fingers in his hair
He's breathing softly, the usual crease in his forehead from frowning gone as the smallest of smiles is etched onto his adorable face. He looked so content in your arms - his hands holding you close to him in a loving grip even as he slept.
You can only smile as he shifts the slightest bit in his sleep, mumbling your name in his sleep before growing silent once again. You'd like to think he was dreaming of you (spoiler alert; he was) but all your thoughts come to a screeching halt when you hear the unmistakable foot steps of Yuji Itadori in the hallway.
Your eyes latch onto the door knob - and widen in full blown panic once you realized Megumi had forgotten to lock the door when entering your dorm room
There's no questioning it - his footsteps are approaching your door. You and Megumi's secret relationship was about to be exposed if you don't act - and fast.
In a panic, you fling your blanket over Megumi's sleeping form in an attempt to hide his body from the pink haired boy. Unfortunately, his long legs were peaking out from under the blanket - and you hurl your biggest stuffed animal across the bed just as your door swings open. Fortunately, they hit their mark, covering the remaining visible body of Megumi as Yuji's face appears in the doorway
"Y/n! Hey!" He says cheerfully, Nobara right behind him as she mumbles something about Yuji being too loud while she follows his footsteps into your dorm room
You're frozen in fear - and Nobara's footsteps come to a slow stop as she looks at you in confusion
"You ok, y/n?" She questions, but the color drains from your face as you remember Yuji's ritual of jumping onto your bed when he visits you
The boy claims that it's necessary for him to jump on your bed every single time he comes into your room because of the load of stuffed animals you have on your bed. He adores every single pink plushy you own - claiming that you guys were their parents.
He's launching off the floor with his usual excited grin as you look towards him - absolutely mortified
"YUJI! DO NOT - !"
"CANNONBALL!"
But he's already in the air when you cry out the words, and the sickening sound of him landing on Megumi's back has you yelping in fear
Megumi kicks Yuji off the bed the moment he landed on him - and he's groggily raising his head from under your blanket, an angry scowl etched on his face due to the fact that he was awoken from his once peaceful nap
"What the hell wa-"
But his words trail off as he see's the petrified Yuji on the floor - Nobara standing at the entrance of your room with her jaw practically on the floor as you just look towards Megumi - your cheeks are pink and the feeling of being so overwhelmingly embarrassed has you hiding your face in Megumi's shoulder as you let out a defeated groan
"Yuji you god damn idio-"
"I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT!" Nobara interrupts, and Megumi's hands are instinctively reaching out and covering your ears in an attempt to protect them from the girl's very loud screeching
She's pumping her fist into the air, chanting how she was sure all along the two of you were together - while Yuji is whipping his head back and forth between you to Megumi - his eyes widening once he realizes Megumi had been sleeping in your lap - and the pieces finally snap together in his mind
"HAH! KNEW IT!" Nobara yells, before jumping onto your bed and attacking you with a hug while you laughed
"Wha- Hey! Stop it!" Megumi argues as she pulls you out of his embrace - and Yuji only shrugs with a grin before pulling himself onto the bed and tackling Megumi with his own hug
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk megumi#megumi x reader#fushiguro#jjk drabbles#jjk fluff#satoru gojo#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#megumi fushiguro#gege akutami#jjk yuji#yuji itadori#nobara kugisaki#jjk nobara#jjk kugisaki#jujutsu kaisen megumi#yuuji itadori#jjk fushiguro#jjk funny#gojo jjk#jjk smau#smau#・❥ beena writes・#megumi fushiguro x reader#megumi fushiguro x you
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Reader falling obsessively in love with kny men after getting poisoned
Pairings: Rengoku x fem!reader; Sanemi x fem!reader; Giyu x fem!reader; bonus Genya x fem!reader
Word Count: 4k
Warnings: There's no smut going on but it's definitely a close call lol, I just thought this concept is funny so the fics itself and the whole scenarios aren't 100% serious it's getting absolutely heated in every single one though hehe, Not proofread bc I literally finished this last minute before my flight lol, I'm currently in Greece when this gets published so surprise ya girl with your support until she's back 🤍
Rengoku Kyojuro
“And you’re sure this is safe?”, you question while looking up at Shinobu with frightful eyes.
It should be fine. After all, Shinobu is the one who invented a medicine that is supposed to finally force your headache away. She’s a professional, so well-educated that even Kagaya-sama’s very own children get treated by her.
Even though she didn’t have the chance to test this medicine, you should be fine.
Right?
“As you know, I’ll never promise something I can’t keep, (y/n). But you’re here with me and if something goes wrong, I will find a way”, she tries to reassure you, only to spike your panic up even higher.
“Listen Shinobu, maybe I’ll try something e-“
Before you’re able to finish your sentence and stop her, you feel a needle poking through your arm oh so gently.
For a moment, you simply sit there and blink in confusion. Huh, not as bad as you thought. It really seems like your headache slowly but surely starts fainting away while the medicine burns every so slightly through your veins.
Not bad at all.
Until your heartbeat picks up so suddenly that your eyes dart wide open. Like in trance, you yank out of the chair you were sitting in, orbs darting around without a real aim while frantically searching for something.
Or rather someone.
What a quiet and peaceful day it is to roam around the beautiful butterfly estate. Rengoku actually didn’t even plan to come here. After all, he isn’t injured nor does he need something from Shinobu-san. To be honest, he’s only here because of you.
You told him yesterday that you’ll see Shinobu today in order to test medicine that is supposed to end your ongoing headaches. You were a little frightened when you thought about getting an injection, so it was never a question for Rengoku to be there for you. Hopefully, he made it on time.
“Kyojuro.”
He furrows his eyebrows and turns towards that unusual seductive voice.
When your eyes meet his, he forgets how to breathe. There you stand, your kimono opened just enough for him to catch a glimpse of your chest like never before. But what simply sweeps him off his feet are your eyes. As gorgeous and captivating as ever, but this time igniting an so unknown spark, inviting him to a silent dance.
“(y/n), are you feeling alright?”
Your hips swing from side to side as you draw closer to him and place your hand straight over his beating heart.
“I’m feeling better than ever before, Kyojuro.”
Kyojuro can’t help but blush deeply, eyes widening in surprise. A nervous smile plays on his lips while he stammers slightly, unable to hide his flustered state. Is this really you, the secret love of his life, discovering his body with your bare hands? The second your flat palms start wandering over his back, his hands start to fidget. Out of instinct, he avoids eye contact, his very own hands now keeping you in place.
“W-What’s going on. (y/n)?”, he stammers like he never did before.
“Take me, Kyojuro.”
His eyes grow even wider, usual confidence momentarily faltering like a house of cards.
“I-I…um, what?”
With a force he didn’t even know you have, you shove him against a nearby tree, your knee gliding between his legs.
“I want you since the first time I saw you. I won’t wait for another opportunity when you’re right here.”
“(y/n)…D-did you already meet Shinobu-san?”
Are you sick or injured? A quick scan of your body reveals nothing that could indicate a serious wound. No, to be precise, you reveal nothing but your soft curves, your gorgeous frame he has never seen like this before. With your kimono slightly opened and the cleavage that peaks at him oh so invitingly…He never felt your hands pressed against his chest like that before, never got a taste of how well you fit inside of his arms.
No. He shakes his head ever so slightly, forces his own mind back to reality. This isn’t the (y/n) he knows. You’d never sneak up on him like this, even if the words you just spoke are true.
Oh, please let them be true.
“All I care about is you”, you purr, face now only inches away from his.
If his back wasn’t pressed against a tree already, Kyojuro would lose his balance for sure. He was always captivated by that gorgeous colour your eyes have, never able to look away. But now, with that dark gleam inside of them, your hands wrapped around his neck. A little innocent kiss, a dream that comes true right here and now-
“(y/n), come back right now!”, a voice cries behind him so suddenly that he jumps up inside the cage of your comforting arms.
“We are here, Shinobu-san!”, he replies automatically.
Only to regret his words instantly. Just one second more and his lips would have touched yours, only a few moments more in your embrace before it all ends again. It takes him all his strength to let go of you when Shinobu arrives with an injection ready in her hand.
“I’m beyond sorry, Rengoku-san! (y/n)’s strange behaviour is all my fault. But don’t worry, I’ll bring her back in just a moment.”
Faster than he’s even able to comprehend the insect pillar’s words, she sticks a needle into your arm and releases the injection.
You blink a few times, head spinning uncontrollably as you stumble backwards. Where are you? What happened? Your head pounds so roughly against your skull that you feel like puking any given minute.
“How are you feeling, (y/n)?”, Shinobu’s comforting voice rings in your ears.
Slowly but surely, your foggy vision starts to get clear again.
“Since when are you so tall, Shinobu?”, you mumble absently.
“It’s me, (y/n). Kyojuro.”
Oh.
“Kyojuro!”, you mumble in utter surprise.
“But…what are you doing here?”
“Let’s not talk about it. I-I…I need to go now”, the flame hashira announces before turning on his heels and walking away.
You stare at his back in nothing but confusion. What is wrong with him? Is he not feeling well, maybe?
“Is it just me or does Kyojuro walk very strange today?”, you question, earning endless giggles from Shinobu next to you.
“He does indeed.”
Sanemi Shinazugawa
“Watch out idiot, you’re gonna get hit!”, the white-haired man barks harshly at you before dashing towards again.
It happened faster than you were ready to react. A little troll through the woods at night, a deep conversation with the wind hashira. And just a few seconds later, an upper-ranked demon appeared out of nowhere.
“Don’t let it hit you, (y/n)!”
“I’m not stupid, dumbass!”, you bite back while dodging another hit with a tendril.
What a strange-looking demon that woman is. With countless pink tendrils that act as her hair and her long tongue, she really looks different from every demon you’ve seen before.
“Still fighting for your love, you fool?”, she jeers at Sanemi before trying to hit him once again.
"I will show you what love really is! It's a consuming fire that burns away your sense of self, leaving you hollow and desperate. It's an obsession that blinds you to reality, making every thought, every breath, every heartbeat revolve around the one person who becomes your entire world. In this love, you lose your freedom, your identity, and your sanity, as you sacrifice everything to feed the insatiable hunger that never goes away-“
“Can you just stop talking shit, ugly bitch? I just wanna go home”, Sanemi interrupts her dryly
You chuckle to yourself. As if a demon would know anything about love. Their only purpose on this earth is to kill innocent humans for the fun of it.
“What the hell do you know about love, huh? All you do is destroying it”, you blurt out.
Just a moment of sloppiness, a second of turning your back to the tendrils that surround you like a prison. The second you feel it, it’s already too late.
“(y/n)!”, Sanemi cries out, feet rapidly carrying him to your side in order to slice through that fucking piece of tendril that pierced itself through your leg.
He wraps his arms around you tightly, saves you from clashing onto the ground. But the second you open your eyes again, they don’t look like they did before. No, you look obsessed.
“Hey, look at me (y/n). Come back to me”, he insists, a slight tone of panic now taking over his usual so harsh voice.
What if that bitch poisoned you? Shinobu is miles away, there’s no way in hell he’d make it on time. And even now, tendrils continue to circle both of you, waiting for an opportunity to hurt him as well.
“Just see what love does to you! You’ll have to kill her!”
“What the fuck are you talking about”, he hisses under his breath.
“(y/n)?”
“Sanemi.”
Your voice sounds dark, unpromising, coated in something he’s never heard before.
“Hey, are ya alright?”
You’re moving too fast for him to react. In the split of a second, you sit on top of him, your hands holding his in place while your lips start tracing up and down his neck.
For a moment, Sanemi forgets how to exist.
You’re sitting on top of him.
With your lips pressed against his neck.
Almost instantly, blood shoots up his face and straight into his private parts, eyes widen in…horror?
No, not because of you, not because he doesn’t enjoy to finally feel you this close. But this isn’t you. This is the poison of that fucking demon.
Just before he gets hit as well, he slices through another tendril that was ready to attack both of you.
“You can’t save her and yourself!”, the demon shouts at him in sheer amusement.
“Your love will get you killed!”
“(y/n).”
His voice is as tender as never before, hands now grabbing your arms oh so gently.
“You need to come back to me, okay? This isn’t you, this isn’t…how you feel for me.”
He hates the way his heart starts aching as soon as those words leave his mouth. There’s no way in hell someone like you would ever fall for someone like him if it wasn’t for that demon. Not when you’re so gorgeous, so breathtakingly beautiful, so smart-
“But I love you, Sanemi! And I need you!”, you cry out, lips now only inches away from meeting yours.
“You don’t love me, (y/n). How could you ever love me?”
“Let me show you.”
Just before your hand gets the chance to grab his pants, he swings you around in order to lay on top of you – completely out of breath and flustered like never before.
“You need to focus. We need to kill that bitch”, he tries to remind you while dodging another wave of attacks with his free hand.
“You’ll need to kill her!”
“Shut up!”, he barks at the demon behind him.
But that thing’s right. With you writhing like a snake underneath him and those countless merciless attacks, he can concentrate on neither.
“I’m the only one who’s able to save her-“
“I said shut up!”
“(y/n), please get yourself together”, he breathes out.
God, why do you have to look so damn tempting with your legs wrapped around his waist and eyes as flustered as he’s never seen before? Countless lonely nights, he imagined what you might look like, feel like, sound like.
But this isn’t real. That sudden outburst of love isn’t real.
“Looks like you’re busy, Shinazugawa. Maybe you should do things like that somewhere other than on the battlefield”, a painfully known voice comments behind him dryly.
“Shut up at take care of that bitch. I need to look after (y/n)”, he instructs the serpent hashira sharply before picking you up and sprinting into the woods.
“I need you. Please”, you beg between his arms, the way your hands roam around his chest simply driving him insane.
“You can’t help her!”, a faint female voice cries behind both of you.
Screw that fucking demon. He needs to get the real you back, needs to finally confess his damned feelings. Even if all of this is nothing but poison, he simply can’t live like this anymore. Not when you’re so close to him every day, not when he secretly can’t get enough of that sight in front of him right now.
“Come back to me, (y/n)”, he almost begs while letting you down.
Fuck, what is he supposed to do? What if he’s not able to help you? Even if he sends after Shinobu, you might go insane until she arrives. And what if you do something stupid, what if he isn’t able to protect you? And what if this isn’t the only thing that cursed poison does?
“Don’t you love me? I thought you like me back, I thought we have a future together, I…I can’t do this without you!”, you suddenly scream on top of your lungs while bursting out in tears.
“What? I never said that-“
“I don’t wanna live without you. I…I’ll end this!”
It happens almost too fast for him to react. In the matter of milliseconds, you grab your sword and direct it towards your throat, ready to slice it open with full-force.
“You little idiot”, he hisses through gritted teeth while forcing your blade away.
“I love you so fucking much that it hurts, you’re the only thing I’m thinking about constantly! Can’t you see that you’re driving me crazy since joining the corps!? I love you, (y/n)! I always did and I definitely always will! You’ve got me trapped, goddamn!”
And then he presses his lips against yours. Longingly, passionately, as if you’re air and he cannot breathe. Never in his life, Sanemi longed for something so small yet so big. Each and every night, his mind wandered to your lips, your laugh, just you and your fucking perfect self. He can’t stand the thought of you talking about yourself so badly. Him not loving you? Are you fucking insane?
“Sanemi.”
You breathe his name against his lips oh so sweetly.
Sweetly, with that cheeky undertone he knows so well.
“Is that you, (y/n)?”
When he opens his eyes again, he gets greeted by the gleaming kindness that radiates from your orbs just inches away from his.
“I’m sorry for…throwing myself at you like that…”, you mutter with reddened cheeks.
How embarrassing. You can’t believe you were about to touch his groin without permission. Even if you were poisoned, what the hell has gotten into you? And why do you have to remember all the things you’ve said and done? That would have been the least that cursed poison could have done…
“Don’t be, it’s fine”, Sanemi replies equally awkward.
“But…are you actually into me?”, you mumble followed by a swift gaze.
“I…I mean…-“
“He totally is”, Obanai barges into the conversation from behind.
Giyu Tomioka
“Didn’t you say that-ah! This was supposed to be easy?”, you press out while fighting a bunch of demons.
You really have no idea how you ended up here. Just a few seconds ago, you were having the best sleep of the week when your crow interrupted your slumber as rude as ever and literally dragged you onto the battlefield straight on his side.
His side. Giyu Tomioka, to be exact. The mysterious yet captivating water hashira you are eyeing since the first day of joining the chosen circle of pillars. What is it that ties you onto him like a chain, that forces your mind to wander towards him each and every day without any break?
“I will take care of the right side. Stay focused”, he instructs you as absent as ever, not even sending you a single look while your heart is all over the place.
It’s ridiculous and you know it all too well. A man like Giyu would never fall for someone as clumsy and unsettled at you. He will never look at you the way you look at him, not even daring to send you a single smile. Because you’re nothing but comrades, distant known. If it wasn’t for your responsibilities as pillar, he would have never even talked to you.
And you absolutely hate the way this stinging fact bugs you every single day of your life.
“You’re not focused enough, stupid girl”, a voice way too close suddenly purrs inside your ear.
There’s no time left to react. Not even Giyu Tomioka is able to reach you in time when the demon scratches your neck oh so slightly.
Only enough to spill your blood.
Only enough to make you go absolutely insane.
Your mind gets flooded by a wave of emotions, memories, thoughts. All at once. So rapidly that you feel like fainting any given minute.
“What did you do to her?”
“Nothing hurts more but the truth. Did you ever wonder about what she might feel for you, even love, maybe? I will reveal her darkest secrets, her thoughts that were never said out loud. And when she finally loses her mind completely, I will force her to kill you and afterwards herself!”
Giyu’s eyes widen at those words. You, loving him? He never even dared to think about something like this, not when you are admired by everyone around you. Why would you fall for someone as quiet and boring as him?
He swallows hard. But knowing that deep inside him is definitely different from hearing those words coming out of your mouth.
“Giyu.”
Your voice sounds cold and distant, eyes completely blank.
“(y/n), I will get you out of here, I’m sure Shinobu is able to-“
“I love you.”
You hate him.
No.
You love him?
“And I’ve loved you for so long that I lost count a long time ago. I love the way you walk, the way you inspect the world around you so carefully. I love how tender you are when it comes to children. I love your kindness, your calm voice-“
“Wait, this wasn’t supposed to go like this!”, the demon cries out.
“I love the feeling of your eyes set on me even though I know I’d never stand a chance. You are so much more than a friend to me, so precious that it hurts. And I can’t help but imagine myself lying inside your arms every night. I can’t help but stare at you whenever I catch you training. I can’t stop those butterflies from invading my stomach every time you’re around. I love you with all my heart even though I know you’d never love me back.”
HIs mind goes blank, ocean blue eyes staring at you in sheer disbelief. Suddenly everything else around you goes silent. The demon, the screams from afar. All he’s able to see is you with those tears glistening in your orbs.
Giyu’s heart skips a beat when he begins to realize.
You really mean it. Every word you just said is true.
“But I do feel the same way about you”, he finally replies while cupping your hands with his.
“I just never thought someone like you would fall for someone like me.”
“I would always choose you”, you clarify in an instant.
And then your eyes roll back into your skull, your lifeless body threatens to hit the cold ground.
-later-
“Giyu? Where’s Giyu?”, you croak out before you even open your eyes, your heart hurting so bad that you feel like puking.
What happened? All you’re able to remember is Giyu’s hands intertwined with yours before everything turned black. Or was it just a dream?
“Finally, I was so worried about you, (y/n).”
But no. At this very moment, he still holds onto your hand tightly while looking down at you with his brows furrowed.
“What happened?”
“You were poisoned by a demon and lost consciousness. I carried you to the butterfly estate”, he explains as briefly as ever.
“You…carried me?”
“Of course I did. You were unconscious, like I said.”
“Did we hold hands?”, you blurt out so suddenly that you even scare yourself.
You can feel Giyu sliding back and forth on his chair, eyes avoiding yours at any cost. Oh no, did you make him feel uncomfortable? What if he’s annoyed because of your foolish mistake? You should have never asked him-
“(y/n), do you remember the conversation we’ve had on the battlefield?”, he questions with unspoken hope glimmering inside his orbs.
“I…I don’t remember anything…”, you finally admit.
What did you talk about? Did you insult him? And what about that demon? That thing definitely wasn’t a lower ranked demon.
“You told me you love me.”
Your heart leaves your body and soul behind, glossy eyes staring at him in sheer disbelief. Fuck, did you hear that correctly? You told him you love him?
“I…I said that?”, you stutter.
“I mean…M-maybe I h-hit my head a l-little too h-“
“And I love you too.”
Oh.
This is even more ridiculous.
“You love me?”, you shriek in reply.
“I never thought about the possibility that you might actually like me back. But when that demon poisoned you, when you told me that you love me���I can’t keep this lie up any longer. I love you, (y/n).”
Gently, he wraps his comforting arms around your aching body, allows you to take in his calming scent.
“It embarrasses me that it took a demon to finally say this out loud.”
“But…would you mind telling me what I said?”, you mumble against his neck.
He lifts up your head enough for you to catch a glimpse of his breath-taking smile.
“I’d rather keep these words for myself.
Bonus: Genya Shinazugawa
“Where’s (y/n)!?”, Mitsuri cries out in sheer panic while darting around the estate in a haste.
“(y/n)? I’ve seen her on her way to the hot springs just a few moments ago”, Tanjiro replies in utter confusion.
“Is there somebody else, Tanjiro-kun?”, Mitsuri continues while grabbing Tanjiro’s shoulders roughly.
“Hello, Genya”, you purr.
“(y-y/n)!? What the hell are you doing here, I’m taking a bath!”, Genya cries out with his cheeks already bright red.
But instead of getting lost like he told you to, you let your towel fall to the floor.
And stand in front of him.
Completely naked.
“What are you doing!?”, he shrieks.
In the matter of seconds, he turns himself away from you, his face burning like a thousand fires. Fuck, he’s already flustered when you’re around him in your uniform. But you, butt-naked, in the same hot spring? He’ll definitely die here.
“I needed to see you. There’s actually something I wanted to tell you in a long time, Genya.”
When the water around him starts to move due to you entering the hot spring, he feels like dying out of excitement and fright. You shouldn’t be here together, not when you’re completely naked, not alone. He never prepared himself for something like this to happen, didn’t even allow his mind to wander such places. Fuck, what is he supposed to do?
Suddenly, he finds himself whirled around in your arms, your chest pressed against his.
Your very naked chest.
Fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck.
“What are you doing!?”
“Come on, I saw the looks you were giving me when you thought I wasn’t watching”, you purr while drawing small circles onto his chest.
“I…no…I didn’t mean it…that way…I just think that…that you are awesome. And cute…”, Genya mumbles.
“(Y/N)!”
Another splash, another butt-naked woman that now grabs your shoulders and pulls you out of the water with impressive strength.
“I’m so sorry, Genya! I fear (y/n) mistook the love portion I made for juice!”, Mitsuri bubbles while trying to tame you down.
“CAN THE TWO OF YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE NOW!?”
Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld
@froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake
@lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @sugu-love @ryva @baku2345
@komelrebi-san @kentocalls @barbuse @sunshine7queen @lavenderdrxp
@yaninnaacu @hopefulbelievertimemachine @laurencrsnt @sanemifucker
#kny#kny fanfic#kny funny#kny x reader#kny x you#demon slayer#demon slayer fanfic#demon slayer funny#demon slayer x you#demon slayer x reader#rengoku kyojuro#kny rengoku#demon slayer rengoku#rengoku x reader#kyojuro rengoku#kny kyojuro#rengoku x y/n#sanemi shinaguzawa#sanemi shinazugawa#sanemi x reader#sanemi x you#kny sanemi#demon slayer sanemi#giyu tomioka#demon slayer giyuu#giyuu x reader#kimetsu giyuu#genya shinazugawa#kny genya#demon slayer genya
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"hostage situation"
series masterlist
nightwing, to his siblings: okay, so we have to be real careful because the joker and harley quinn are holding our baby sibling hostage and we can't put them in anymore danger.
nightwing, looks at red robin: i'm sure they have some traps laid around the lair so you'll be disarming it.
red robin, nods:
robin: then me and todd will be handling any spare targets, no?
nightwing: of course. cass, steph and duke will be guarding the entrance. babs?
oracle, speaking in the intercoms: this is the closest point of entry where (name) is being kept hostage.
red robin: security cams suggest there's more than just harley and the joker in the lair. a bunch of their goons are heavily guarding both the entrance and the exit. we should thread carefully.
oracle: there's no camera's where (name) is exactly at, but there's a specific room where it's shown that the two are often visiting.
batman, who had been lurking behind them: this is a priority mission. we can't afford to make mistakes.
robin, eyebrows raised: though, is it necessary to bring the entire family? me and my father could handle this entirely by ourselves.
jason, sighs: don't pretend like you weren't the first to suggest the entire justice league to come searching for them, kid.
batman: enough arguing, (name) needs all the support they could get after this. so on my count, we are to bust open the door.
dick: alright, everybody, prepare.
*meanwhile, inside the lair, in a makeshift "house"*
(name), sitting on a comfy chair whilst holding a cup of hot chocolate and a book in the other, sneezes: oh— did anyone mention my name?
harley quinn, already on her way to wipe their nose: oh my baby! is our baby sick?!
(name): no, i just suddenly sneezed?
the joker, in another room: i spy with my little eye, a child way past their bedtime~ c'mon babyboo, let's get you to bed!
(name): awe, but it's like, 10pm. i wanna read some more.
harley, about to pick (name) up: then let momma read the book for you in bed, cutesy pie—
*the door to the kitchen slams open*
dick, with his escrima sticks on-hand: surrender (name) to us now or—!
dick, absolutely befuddled: wait, what?!
damian, with bruce in tow: what's the hold up, nightwing?!
damian, about to jump right in front of dick before he was stopped by bruce's hand on his shoulder: what is... this?
bruce: ... explain the meaning of this, harley.
harley, holds (name) closer to her chest as she's equally confused: what do ya mean, bats? ain't it obvious i'm taking care of my child?
(name): uhm...
damian, visibly offended: what do you mean, your child? (name) over there is ours.
the joker, walks over to the room in a hurry: what's with all the commotion over here?! (name) is supposed to be in bed, harle— batman?!
bruce, with squinted eyes: don't act stupid, what is this all about?
nightwing, surveying the room: wait, why is (name) in pajamas?
(name), trying their best to shrug in harley's tight hug: i'm... supposed to go to bed...?
the joker, about to walk over to (name) before he's stopped by a batarang almost hitting the side of his head: hey! what's that for? i'm clearly not trying to attack my own child!
bruce: (name) is my child, not yours.
the joker, glaring at batman: well, it's not my fault they choose me over you!
(name) wayne, interrupting the two: uhm... i did technically disown myself from the family so—
damian: disown yourself?
(name): i have every reason to—
dick: look, baby bird, you don't know what's right for you, these guys are dangerous—
(name): i literally got nearly killed by some nobody criminals if not for harley saving me but okay, nightwing.
bruce, whose attention is now on (name): you almost got what now?
(name), rolling their eyes: i almost died, batman. now if you excuse me, i think i deserve a good night sleep tonight.
(name), looks at harley who still hasn't released them from the protective hug: can we?
harley quinn, facepalming in her mind as she stares back at (name): oh, i should've bought you to pam and selina instead.
#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#a&a: incorrect quotes#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere batboys#yandere dc villains#yandere batman#yandere bruce wayne#yandere dick grayson#yandere jason todd#yandere tim drake#yandere damian wayne#yandere harley quinn#yandere joker#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x gn reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#platonic yandere#this is so messy but it's so funny to think about at the same time#idek if this is accurate but i love me some messy family
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SISIDHJDWKWOWOSOOSW IM ACTUALLY DYING LAUGHING 😭
GOJO WOULD RECORD THIS AND SHOW IT TO ITADORI AND NOBARA 😭😔
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk fluff#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk#jjk gojo#jjk x oc#jjk megumi#jjk smut#megumi x reader fluff#megumi fluff#jujutsu megumi#megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen megumi#gojo x reader fluff#jujutsu gojo#dad gojo#gojo meme#jjk memes#funny memes#jjk x reader fluff#jjk x y/n#jjk angst#jjk fanfic#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk geto#jujutsu kaisen nanami
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Your first date
#facebook memes#meme#funny#my work#creepypasta#meme art#creepypasta art#creepypasta fanart#creepypasta headcanon#creepypasta stories#creepypasta ticci toby#ticci toby x reader#ticci tobi#ticci toby#creepypasta toby#ticcy toby#toby rogers#ticci toby x y/n#ticci toby x you#creepypasta x y/n#x y/n#y/n#creepypasta memes#creepypasta fandom
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Y/N x 141
Based off something that happened last night
TW: talk of past suicide attempts, morbid humor, ooc 141
Y/N and the boys: having a peaceful night
Y/N: Looks Gaz dead in the eyes Do you want to know how I tried to kill myself when I was like... Eleven?
Gaz: Being tired as hell, slowly nods Get it off your chest kiddo
Y/N: Overly excited OKAY SO! When I was younger I was going to hang myself
Gaz: Chokes on his coffee, not really expecting the enthusiasm O- Cough ka- Cough y
Y/N: And I was thinking about it, then I realized my ceiling was to thin so I didn't but I think the other reason was I was laughing to hard
Gaz: What the hell were you laughing Y/N? Genuinely concerned now
Y/N: BECAUSE! I realized that I'd be a pinata and I thought about how funny it would be if I put a sign on my door that said "Pinata Inside"with baseball bats by the door so when people walked in they'd bee really excited then they'd see it was me and they'd be traumatized! Starts hysterically laughing
Gaz: Stares At Y/N, pretty sure he got traumatized from that information Y/N... That's not funny...
Y/N: I-It's hil- giggles ari- giggle ous! Sees Soap out of the corner of their eye SOAP! SOME'RE! Y/N: Proceeds to tell Soap that information and getting a giggle from him
Gaz: SOAP! That's not funny!
Soap: I mean... It is just a little bit-
#Y/N x 141#y/n funny#141 Incorrect quotes#Dark humor#dark humor tw#141#141 x y/n#141 x reader#cod 141#task force 141#tf 141#mw2 141#call of duty#mw2#cod#soap cod#cod mw2#cod mwf2#cod modern warfare#mwii#modern warfare 2#gaz x reader#gaz mw2#gaz call of duty#kyle gaz garrick#gaz cod#soap mactavish#soap#soap mw2#john soap mactavish
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can you PLEASEEEE do something with the idea of reader stealing/wearing katsukis clothes?? you’re the only one who i think will fully do this idea justice xx
pure fluff, reader is a thief, reader likes the way katsuki smells, roughhousing lol kinda ?? katsuki sorta tackles you, katsuki is a meanie, tickling, no pronouns mentioned in this one I don’t think ! lemme know if i missed sum else !!
a/n : hey so this has been sittin in my drafts for literal decades omg IM SO SORRY🙁🙁🙁🙁ALSO BTW TYSM FOR THINKIN I COULD DO UR ASK JUSTICE I WAS SO FLATTERED WHEN I READ THIS I WAS GIGGLING N SHIT🤭🤭i was always so excited for this ask but I literally never got around to doing it after my break n stuff, im slowly (and that’s suuuuper slowly im so sorry yall i suck) getting to all of your asks one at a time and im so grateful yall r still givin me the time of day honestly , so please be patient with me🤧💗💗💍 ! But anway enough dumping ! Anon if you’re still sticking around, i truly hope u enjoy this ! And ofc all of yall too ! much luv xxx!!
"you fuckin' thief.."
shit. you thought he'd be gone for longer.
lately, you’d been routinely sneaking into katsuki’s dorm room and nabbing some of his clothes. sweaters, hoodies, t-shirts : as long as they were in your reach, you’d grab them.
it's not your fault, really ! katsuki's clothes are so cosy and warm and they smell just like him. plus, they're perfect to snuggle in when he's busy, how could you not borrow them for a little while ?!
..except you can admit that you’ve been stalling..and a lot of his clothes were still in your room, but you still planned on giving them back..soon !
and you can’t even pretend, because you’re wearing on of his hoodies that had been missing for a good week now.
"katsuki, baby." you slowly lean away from his clothes drawer, your hand ready to snag a black hoodie of his slowly trailing towards the floor "i can explain."
"all my damn sweaters, my fuckin' hoodies. they all just vanished without a trace.." he starts, slowly stalking over to you. you squeak, slowing getting on your knees to prepare yourself should you have to break his ankles and sprint out of the room. he's fuming, eyebrows twitching "thought i was goin' crazy.."
"and all this time.."
"suki.." you try, voice wobbly as your knees shake with each step closer he gets.
"it's been fucking YOU ?!"
and he pounces.
with a squeal, you scramble and dash away just as he leaps for you and narrowly misses, he's got you cornered as you're on opossite sides of his bed while you beg for mercy and he keeps yelling at you to 'come here'. in a panick you grab one of his pillows and fling it at him.
it feels like the pillow slides down his face in slow motion to reveal a look so vile a demon appearing in front of you right now would scare you less
“you’re. so. dead.”
there’s really nowhere else for you to go. you’re truly cornered, you might as well just be buried right now. you think about the leftovers waiting for you in the fridge and how sero still hadn’t returned the manga he’d leant from you, but you’ve lived a pretty good life.
before your body can decide to move, katsuki leaps over to you tackling you and having you land straight onto his bed with a loud shriek.
frantically, you wave your hands around “wait, wait pleasepleasepleasepleasepleas-” but your begs of mercy are cut off when katsuki jams a finger into your side, causing you to yelp. he hovers over you with a mean smirk. and you know what’s coming.
“katsu—”
you don’t even get to finish before he jams his hands into your sides and mercilessly tickles you.
from an outsiders point of view? this is harmless. but your boyfriend is mean and the biggest asshole in the world because he knows all of your weak spots and the places he knows will have you shaking and gasping for breath. it felt like actually torture, really.
“thought you could get away with it, huh ?” he sneers, leaning down a bit more so he’s eye level with you “thought you could keep taking my shit and i’d just neeever find out, hm ? yeah ?”
“b-but i—ah ! didn’t—!” you gasp and squeal, choking on the sentences you can’t manage to push out of your throat as your eyes squeeze closed. you don’t have to see his face to know he’s enjoying this.
“you’re a fuckin’ thief.” he spits, backing up from you so you don’t headbutt him square in the nose from your thrashing. you’re response is nothing but a harsh gasp and he smirks wider.
you think he’s finally, finally taken pity on you when his fingers slow to a stop, but he glares down at you, hands still on either sides of you “say it.”
you can’t even catch your breath before he hurriedly pressed closer to your sides to scare you, you shriek “stop ! m’sorry !”
“not what i wanted you to say, try again.”
“you’re—” you take a breath “sucha”
his fingers graze your shirt and his eyes are wide, daring you to finish your sentence, you bring your hands up to try to hide his field of vision.
“OKAY ! okay, okay…” you slowly lower your hands away, finally dropping them at your sides with a sigh “m’ a thief…” you mumble in defeat, embarrassment creeping up on you not only from the fact that you got caught but that the blond above you clearly enjoyed your torture if the evil snickers you heard we’re any sign of that.
he hums in satisfaction “mhm, no good fuckin’ thief. should lock you up and throw away the key on your ass.” you hate how handsome he looks when he’s playful like this with you. your sides still hurt and your voice is croaky from how out of breath you were and for a moment you seriously thought you saw the pearly gates.
you pout, and all it does is make him smile wider.
your boyfriend is mean. and the biggest asshole in the entire fucking world.
“s’not my fault..your clothes are comfy.” you mumble, crossing your arms over your chest. “and they smell good.”
he scoffs, leaning down closer towards you “that’s cus i fuckin’ wash them. and i haven’t been able to lately cus someone’s been stealing my entire closet.”
“i didn’t !”
“was boutta make me walk around naked, ya moron. all my clothes are gone.” you roll your eyes, he never lacked in the dramatics department.
“you’re such a drama queen.” you whine, sinking into his comforter. he ignores you and he presses your cheeks together with one hand, chuckling at your smooched cheeks and furrowed brows.
“stop stealing my stuff.” he announces slowly. he’s clear, no way you could’ve misunderstood him anyway. he sighs and presses a quick peck to your lips still pressed together
“if you want one of my sweaters r’something, jus’ come ask me. can give you one..or whatever.” he finishes, voice slightly muffled in embarrassment as he shoves his mouth against yours again and again making wet kissing sounds and you manage a giggle. he rolls his eyes, but a smile slowly crawls up his face anyway as he releases your cheeks. you let out a happy sigh, opening and closing your mouth to get rid of the slight soreness.
“take this shit off though.” he tugs at the hoodie you’re wearing “stinks. need to put it in the wash.”
“no it doesn’t !” you protest, pressing the color against your nose in an attempt to keep it close to you “it smells like you!” you pout. he doesn’t respond for a bit, opting to squint at you while the tips of his ears turned pink. and in a second his snatched the bottom of it and ripped it off of you, ripping a pathetic scream from you.
he examined his hoodie with an unreadable expression before his eyes land back on you for a second, then he slowly starts folding up his sweater “you trynna say i stink ?” he says lowly.
“no. i wouldn’t wear your clothes if they were nasty” you scrunch up your nose “you can take back the sweater in my room, though. the smell is starting to wear off.”
“gee, thanks for offering to give me my sweater back. weirdo” he glares, spitting his words out sarcastically and you giggle at his extra emphasis on his ownership of the hoodie which earns you a huff.
“ i’m grabbing all the shit you took from me, and they stay with me.” he starts warningly “but you can keep this, i guess..” he adds, patting on his now folded hoodie ready for a cleaning. you smile happily, running your socked feet into his blankets.
“ oh, but don’t forget to wear it first after you washed it, want it to smell like you. otherwise there’s no point.”
“you really are a fucking weirdo.” he spits, but the way his cheeks burn bright red say he’s not truly mad about it. you laugh, and katsuki grumbles. “hope you learned your lesson, freak.” he taunts. you hum in fake thought, then release a sigh.
“yeah, i guess i did.” you concede, and he nods proudly.
and sure, yeah, you’re boyfriend’s a big meanie. but you do a great job at riling him up.
“for now.”
#tehehe this was so funny to make#tysm anon !!#im sorry it took so long tho :(((#still hope you enjoy !#not proofread but will fix later !#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugo fluff#bakugou imagine#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#bakugou katsuki#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou katuski x reader#bakugou fluff#katsuki bakugo fluff#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki x you#katsuki x y/n#bakugou drabble#bakugou x you#bakugou x y/n#bakugo x female reader#bakugo x reader#bakugo x you#bakugo x y/n
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wakatoshi ʚɞ
“y’feel so good honey.”
your cunt sinks onto his meaty tip, pulsing erratically at the unfamiliar stretch.
“hah—.. h-help me, please!”
“take your time, you can do it.”
you try, you really do, shoving yourself onto your lovers cock. he holds you tightly but the fat of your hips, gently guiding your cunt to wrap more and more of him.
“eek— w-waka!”
he sighs, face flushed and eyes shut tight from the pleasure. he lays back into the soft of the bed, peeking out of one eye to watch your flustered expression and your body shiver with pleasure.
“please , n-need your help. i can’t do it m’self..” you mewl, body giving up and landing atop of his, sniffles muffled as you hide yourself into the crook of his neck.
“poor baby.” he teases, soothing over your hair with one hand, the other soothing across your shivering ass. “too much for my honey?”
you nod, bracing yourself as he flips you under him, forced to meet his eyes as he hovers above you.
“y’were almost there,” he stares down at the remainder of his cock you were unable to get inside your cunt, sloppy swipes over your clit in order to quiet his baby’s complaints. “y’gonna do better next time? so i don’t have to do all the work, hm ?”
“y-yes..! t-thank you waka, thank you f’helping me!”
he groans; what sweet pleasure it was to feel your plump ass meet his pelvis.
“no need. thank you f’this perfect pussy honey.”
#haikyu brainrot forgive me#this is funny cus tendou is my fav character actually .#haikyuu x y/n#haikyuu x you#haikyuu smut#ushijima wakatoshi#haikyuu wakatoshi#wakatoshi x reader#hq wakatoshi#wakatoshi smut#ushijima x reader#haikyuu ushijima#ushijima smut#ushijima x you#drabbles ⋆⑅˚₊
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[Famous Boyband] x Y/N Wattpad Styled fic, where Y/N describes in 1st person POV how fragile she is and how hard her life is before the boyband of her dream comes and rescues her, NEVER disappoints, not even in the year of our lord 2024
#writing#memes#wholesome#writeblr#bts#one direction#fanfic#1d#literature#fanfiction#ao3#archive of our own#fic rec#writers#writer#wattpad#x you#x y/n#reader insert#meme#funny#humor#comedy#art#artblr#bts army#bts jimin#bts jungkook
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gf!ellie texts!!
cw: nothing much, just ellie being funny and cute. mention of head lol, pet names: baby, babe. reader calls ellie a faggot lmfaooo. that's all i think, lmk if i missed smthn🫶🏻
a/n: first time doing these text thingys hehe these are super fun to make, def gonna make more of these soon!! can yall give me suggestions on what to write next??? I'm literally so on edge.
divider: @pommecita
#lesbian#ellie williams x you#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams x female reader#ellie x y/n#ellie x you#ellie text#ellie tlou#ellie x reader#ellie the last of us#ellie williams#ellie x fem reader#lgbtq#text message#funny#fluff
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for legal reasons this is a joke
#fnaf#fnaf sb#fnaf dca#dca fandom#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#dca who au#doodle dump#got blasted by a random idea i had to draw again#y/n is offscreen going O_O#not canon! in case it wasn’t clear. i just thought this would be really funny
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Love at first sight
"Who is that girl?", Obanai mumbles while staring you up and down.
"Who cares? Just a lousy brat like all the others I guess."
"I'll go talk to her", Zenitsu announces proudly.
"Zenitsu, I actually don't think she looks that approachable-"
"Hello beautiful lady, are you looking for a husband?", a blonde-haired boy suddenly purrs next to you.
"Maybe try a mirror if you're looking for someone desperate", you bite back.
Just when you're about to turn away and move on, you feel something grab your wrist tightly.
Out of instinct, you yank the blonde boy over your shoulder and send his puny frame straight into the ground.
"I will make sure not even your ancestors are able to identify your puny self if you don't leave me alone right now, you freak", you spit through gritted teeth while digging your heel into his cheek.
As if nothing happened, you shake your hair out of your face and leave the scene with hips swinging side so side.
"Well...", Obanai comments dryly.
"That was...kinda hot. Who is that girl?", Sanemi mumbles.
"Now you're interested in her or what?"
"I have a weakness for outlaws."
#Kny#kny x reader#kny funny#kny drabble#kny fanfic#kny sanemi#demon slayer#demon slayer x y/n#demon slayer x reader#demon slayer x you#demon slayer drabble#Demon slayer funny#demon slayer sanemi#demon slayer kimetsu no yaiba#kimetsu no yaiba#kimetsu no yaiba x reader#kimetsu#kimetsu x reader#kimetsu sanemi#sanemi#sanemi shinazugawa#sanemi shinaguzawa#sanemi x reader#sanemi x you#sanemi x y/n#Sanemi drabble#Sanemi funny#Sanemi fanfic
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