#xenophilius lovegood headcanons

[orchideous-nox]

Favourite loser? 🤨 Like actual losers, not just "well, they're weird". You seem like a Peter person

Okay, starting off by saying I love this ask!!

When I think of losers in the marauders era I wouldn't immediately think of Peter, or at least not the way I hc him. But I do love him in his own special way, but not a loser way. I think there are more losery losers out there.

Like Xenophilius. Man is a humanoid string of cooked spaghetti who loves conspiracies and everything thinks he's a freak. He doesn't have many friends beyond Pandora and Barty (who is also perpetually perceived as being a loser), so he spends a lot of time on his own muttering to himself.

He goes on to be the editor of a magazine that 99% of the wizarding community thinks is nonsense and is mostly ignored. Pandora and Luna regularly have to try and convince him that he's not a loser, not fully believing their own words. He tried to start a Hogwarts student magazine but it was just him, nobody else signed up, or at least not using real names.

He sits in corners of Hogwarts writing things down in his little notebook with his long limp hair that he has to be persuaded to cut and wash, and when he's not in uniform he dresses in clothes that nobody else wears from odd muggle stores in the depths of London.

Some people say he's wacky and zany but I think my boy Phil is a certified loser. He sits down at the Ravenclaw table and people get up and move away from him. He's vibing in his own world doing his little dance like at Bill and Fleur's wedding with his yellow clothes and odd throat singing and pisses the common room off because he refuses to keep it to the confines of his dorm.

In the wise words of Alex, "Phil is the real odd fuck".

[claybyte]

xenophilius is one of my favorite marauders era characters and he doesn't get nearly enough hype so here are a couple headcanons i have for him

xenophilius' grandfather started the quibbler and it was eventually passed down to him. he's been the writer of it since his parents died in his 7th year

in the marauders' year in school

xeno was the one to give the marauders info on how to become animagi. james tricked him into telling them. idk how xeno would know, he just knows a lot of things

fairly close friends with james, acquaintances with the rest of the marauders

does not believe in the concept of gender

was absolutely fascinated with pandora the moment he saw her. they both have a lot of eccentricity and love for nature but in different ways; xenophilius loves creatures and plants and pandora loves potions and experimentation surrounding them

pandora calls him "lovely lovegood" because he gets the insult of "loony lovegood" very often

xeno and pandora got married just a couple years after graduating hogwarts. before that, they'd been dating since xeno's 5th year and pandora's 4th

pandora calls him phil and their friends think it's hilarious that she gave such a common nickname to such a strange man

james firmly denies the existence of nargles so xenophilius started to sneak into gryffindor tower and steal his socks to make him believe nargles had done it. it works

pureblood, not sacred 28 but almost made the cut. most of the reason they didn't was that the other pureblood families simply don't like them because of their weirdness and would prefer to distance themselves from them

[starstruckmoony]

so high school.

masterlist

pairing - james potter x reader

summary - that one cute nerdy guy from your lectures gives you a follow and you end up actually falling for him.

trope/tags - modern!au, uni/college!au, instagram/social media!au, fluff, terrible humor

word count - 704

warnings - language, suggestive jokes

part 1 / part 2 / part 3

prongsyboy

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prongsyboy me and remussy

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starmanblack ...yesterday

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pete___ no words...

yourusername

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12 comments

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prongsyboy

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13 comments

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prongsyboy

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prongsyboy robbers intro?

tagged yourusername

14 comments

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yourusername him.

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rjlupin emphasis on extra

xeno_lovegood congratulations!

marymacdonald cuties 🫶

prongsyboy added to their story

[cheekyboybeth]

the marauders era kids call madam pomfrey “pom pom”

[isabel-lillah]

what if Pandora just forgets to mention she married Xenophilius on a random tuesday because they felt like it

and then three months later her friends find out when they come to visit her because there's a photo from the wedding hanging on the wall

the only one who knew was Reg, who was Pandora's witness and ringbearer

[a-great-tragedy]

Some random waitress at a diner: Congratulates!

Xenophilous: What?

Waitress: *Points to Pandora sitting in a wedding dress* Happy wedding!

Pandora: We’re not married

Waitress: *prolonged eye contact* What?

Pandora: We’ve actually just been to a funeral.

[katakosmos]

i think sometimes we forget that pandora was a mother, and let me tell you, she was also a big mess of a mother. but she tried.

when she realized that, because of her belly, she couldn't fit in her favorite clothes anymore, she punched xenophilius in the face cause it was "his fault";

when she went into labor, she was so scared that she asked the doctors if it was possible to keep the baby inside her a little longer;

during the first months of luna's life, when she did nothing but cry every night, xenophilius removed all the mirrors from the house to prevent pandora from freaking out because of the dark circles under her eyes;

and when luna once threw the spoon with food at her, pandora cried all night thinking luna did it because she was a horrible mother.

in the end, when luna's first word was "mama", she was so happy that she almost asked xenophilius to have another baby, and he had to beg her to wait at least a couple of years.

he was so exhausted. he loved her so much.

also, i think pandora was tragically obsessed with her daughter, she loved to buy her cute little clothes, and for her first birthday she gave her something like 30 gifts. she wanted luna to have a perfect life.

she tried to be a perfect mum, but luna often made her angry (she was a hyperactive child). but then she found out that biting xenophilius helped her calm down, and he started going to work every day covered in bruises (his colleagues were worried). so, when luna grew up to be the calmest girl in the universe, he almost cried of joy.

they are so cute help.

[moonytoasted]

marauders era sexuality headcanons

james potter: unlabeled. he had a crush on frank but it didn't compare to his crush on lily. he can't be bothered to label himself.

remus lupin: gay gay gay

sirius black: bi. can pull every gender and does. him and marlene were each others' first kisses.

peter pettigrew: demiro + demisexual :3

hestia jones: she loves her nerd boyfriend

amos diggory: he loves his strong quidditch girlfriend

lily evans: bi. dated emmeline vance (for like 3 days before they broke out in a screaming match. enemies to lovers speedrun)

marlene mckinnon: lesbianest lesbian to ever live. her, emmeline, and sirius combined have probably flirted with everyone in gryffindor.

mary macdonald: bi (and married dean thomas' dad rahhh)

dorcas meadows: bi/ace :3

emmeline vance: lesbian. or alternatively, sapphic enemies to lovers plot point.

regulus black: thought he was aroace. turns out he's demiro + ace

barty crouch (jr): evan. / evan: barty.

davey gudgeon: straight, acts gay w his friends

sybill trelawney: bi w a HEAVY preference for women.

xenophilius lovegood: straight. #1 ally

pandora: ace + straight but made out w sybill when they were high.

frank longbottom: bi + the crush of every new first year coming in

alice fortescue: straight + the crush of every other new first year.

caradoc dearborn: benjy. in love w him but not out :(

benjy fenwick: bi. he's out.

[asmo-d3us]

Sybill loved Peter who loved James who loved Lily who loved Mary who loved Marlene who loved Dorcas who loved Pandora who loved Xeno who loved Evan who loved Barty who loved Regulus who loved Remus who loved Sirius.

[tea-blankets-andstars]

P.1 Marauders era (boys) Six things:

James:

-gold jewlery

-long eyelashes

-smile bigger then the sun

-loves gardening

-can do the splits (uses it as a party trick)

-6'0

Sirius:

-cascading waterfall of curls

-deap ocean eyes

-resting sad face

-chaotic good

-hot cocoa drinker

-5'9

Remus:

-sweaters

-brown eyes that shine gold

-owns a flip phone

-only wears green and brown tones

-has a scar on his knee from a potion explosion 

-6'4

Peter:

-chess genius

-nose freckles

-loves herbology

-fuzzy socks

-has a 9 step sikncare routine

-5'6

Barty jr:

-little pants little shirt

-noticed but never seen

-always smells like lemon cake

-geinus

-loves watching thor

-6'7

Evan:

-loves anything strawberry

-has natural white hair and eyelashes

-stretch marks

-horrible eyesight but refuses to wear glasses

-nonbinary transmasc

-5'11 (says he's 6'1) 

Regulus:

-one storm grey eye & one light blue with a mix of emerald 

-trans

-secretly loves taylor swift (favorite album is fearless)

-rbf

-blind in one eye (the grey one) 

-5'3

Frank:

-raises cattle

-has a scar on his jaw (from walking into a wall)

-always wearing a hat

-loves ABBA

-has a sheep named barbie

-6'0

Lucius:

-first 2 years at hogwarts his hair was always in french braids

-gray eyes looked green in the sun

-practiced rbf

-swings cane like a baton

-loves horses

-6'2

Xenophilius:

-so pale you could see almost every vain and so that his eyes almost look purple

-trans

-taps feet to the song stuck in his head

-corduroy jackets

-loves playing card games

-5'8

✨ok those are them! girls are next

[orchideous-nox]

He's wacky zany AND a certified loser

He iiissss!!!! That's why I love him so much, and shortening Xenophilius to Phil just adds to it for me, like he's trying to minimise the loseriness but he just makes it worse

[witchygfsgf]

how i imagine the marauders (picrew is made by makowka)

sirius black

remus lupin

peter pettigrew

james potter

lily evans

mary macdonald

marlene mckinnon

dorcas meadowes

pandora lovegood

xenophilius lovegood (my hc is he's a trelawney)

sybill trelawney

alice longbottom

frank longbottom

emmeline vance

emma vanity

lucinda talkalot

amelia bones

edgar bones

hestia Jones

benjy fenwick

charity burbage

aurora sinistra

bellatrix black

andromeda black

narcissa black

ted tonks

rita skeeter

persephone zabini (first name's just a hc)

regulus black

[futurequibblerjournalist]

The headcanon that Pandora is a Rosier and Xenophilius is a Malfoy and that they chose the name Lovegood together after getting married because it better represents them is so dear to me

[starstruckmoony]

so high school.

masterlist

pairing - james potter x reader

summary - that one cute nerdy guy from your lectures gives you a follow and you end up actually falling for him.

trope/tags - modern!au, uni/college!au, instagram/social media!au, fluff, terrible humor

word count - 578

warnings - language, drinking, smoking

part 1 / part 2 / part 3

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yourusername vogue

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xeno_lovegood covergirls

yourusername

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yourusername spider girl?

10 comments

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xeno_lovegood she DEVOURED that

vance_emm god wish i was the ground she walked on

marymacdonald my second wife actually

prongsyboy

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prongsyboy gloden hour

11 comments

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prongsyboy

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prongsyboy girl dinner

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yourusername girlhood

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prongsyboy

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prongsyboy spider boy?

13 comments

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prongsypotter no it calculates

yourusername

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yourusername the fuck

tagged prongsyboy

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prongsyboy

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pete__ what's her name?

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mmmckinnon why he kinda look like remus

starmanblack JESUS FUCK YES HE DOES

prongsyboy because he's angy and eepy

mmmckinnon i just blocked you btw

prongsyboy added to their story

[cheekyboybeth]

Xenophilius draws and paints on all surfaces except for an actual drawing book

[icantdousernamesman]

THE MARAUDERS ERA SIBLINGS

As someone with 5 younger siblings, I refuse to believe that the marauders era characters were almost all only children.

So may i present, MY SIBLING HCS FOR THEM!!!

James- Defo an only child, spoilt rotten and couldnt do anything wrong in his parants eyes. Monty and Effie had him relitively old too, like probably early-mid 40s. Defo a planned baby, they were probs trying for a while but it didnt work so they started to think that they waited too late, so james was like a miricle to them.

Sirius/Regulus- Obviously theyre brothers, feel like they were planned but unwanted. Like, walburga was betrothed to orion, who was lot older than her btw, and they had to consumate their marrage right away, so i feel like sirius was consieved on their wedding night. Walburga wouldve been 13-16 at the time, and orion wouldve been 25-32. Feel like they had another pregnancy right before regulus but it miscarried early on, so when regulus was consived they just pretended that it was the same one. Regulus wouldve been consieved very shortly after sirius bc theyd like as many heirs as possible, like the rest of their family. They wouldve been all disapointed when he was born a girl and i think he wouldve been a difficult pregnency too. After that they wouldve tried again, and had multiple miscarriges before they finally stopped trying.

Remus- Hope and Lyall wanted more kids after remus, but instead they decided that after remus was bitten it woud just be too difficut and not fair on the other kid or remus to be in that situation.

OR

if we're going with the theory that remus was put up for adoption or somthing bc his parants either died or couldnt take him, then i reckon hed have a younger half sister, about 7 years younger than him, and two younger half-brothers, roughly 5 and 9 years younger than him. But either way i feel like hope and lyall had remus young, at like 18 or 20. Defo wasnt planned.

Peter- Peter would've had an older brother by about 10yrs i think. He doesnt see him anymore and hes THAT family member that the rest refuse to talk about for some reason. feel like he also has a 3 years older sister who he was close with, but died in the 1st war a while b4 he betrayed everyone. his brother wouldve been unplanned and his parants wouldve had him at about 21-24. Peter and his sister were both planed tho.

Mary- Girl has a LOT of siblings. Feel like shes a middle child, but the only witch in the family. Has about 6-8 siblings maybe, her being directly in the middle of them all, and also being a bit overlooked bc shes not always home and lives at a bording school, unlike the others who get public school. think she wouldve been rlly close w the youngest sibling before she started hogwarts, but then she started missing them growing up, so they ended up getting distanced. The oldest of her siblings wouldve been unplanned, but after that her parants just decided to go for it and keep having more. They all wouldve been in a relitively cramped flat in south london, probably with their parants in one room, the two oldest kids in another room, three middle kids in another room, and two youngest in a seperate one.

Lily- Honestly i can see it very well how it is, cannon compliant with her and petunia. Feel like they were both planned, and had a pretty mainstream and nuclear family.

Marlene- BROTHERS. Shes the youngest and only girl out of all of her siblings. She has one older brother by about 3-4 years, and then she also has about 3 or 4 older step-brothers from 6-10 years older than her. She was planned, and her parants originally wanted to have more kids after her, but they ended up splitting.

Dorcas- Feel like shes an only child tbh. Possibly has a younger sister, but she would be about 12 years younger than her or something. Would probs still be in hogwarts when dorcas died. Both would've been unplanned, but kept anyway.

Barty- Every ounce of bartys being just screams only child. He was planned, (and regretted) and his mum wanted one more kid after him and close in age, but his dad didnt want any more, so his mum just decided to use the "perfect on 1st try" phrase all the time. Think his parants wouldve been about 27-29 when they had him.

Evan/Pandora- ROSIER TWINS, OBVIOUSLY. They were planned babies, but i hc that their mum died in childbirth, so their dad raised them alone for about 3yrs, before he started dating and eventually married another woman, their step-mum. And about a 7-10 year age gap later, they had their little half-brother Felix. Evan liked him, but pandora LOVED him, and a few parts of him reminded her of regulus too. Felix was defo planned as well.

Brief bonuses

Alice- Has a younger brother and sister. Her brothers about 2 years younger than her, her sisters about 5 years younger. Her and her brother were planned, her sister was not.

Frank- Has a brother one year younger than him, both were planned.

Xeno- Has a brother 12 years older than him. His brother was planned, but he was not.

Molly/Gideon/Fabian- Gideon and Fabian were older than molly and both unplanned, and would always tease her. The twins were about 2 years older, and molly was also unplanned.

UNEXPECTED BONUS

Minnie- Idk why, but i feel like she had a twin sister that died unexpectedly young. Take that how u will.

(R.I.P Maggie smith)