#worse than sherlock at humanity

[tossawary]

One of my personal nitpicks for historical fantasy is a lack of servants, staff, subordinates, and... idk... subjects? Like, their absence is not... a total dealbreaker for me, depending on the situations the characters are in and whether or not I can just assume that other people are there in the background... but so many of the protagonists in historical fantasy stuff are higher-ranking (very often royalty), and/or have busy jobs, and/or have enormous houses that would necessitate having at least part-time staff.

Like, girl, you should have a maid! WHERE is your chaperone?! WHO is driving this carriage?! Where are your footmen? Are you trying to imply that a WEALTHY DUCHESS is taking a CAB?! You know that you probably have tenants, right? Where is your steward?! Where is your lawyer? Your accountant?! (Like, yeah, you're not going to have your lawyer living in your house, but you HAVE one, right???)

Or, man, you're supposed to be a military commander and you don't even have a single secretary?! Where is your SQUIRE?! (In the spirit of historical fiction, I am jumping wildly across time periods with every sentence here.) Man, I know you aren't looking after your own boots. Where are your GUARDS?! Who set up this tent for you?! Who is looking after your horse?! Who is making and carrying the incredibly valuable maps people are recklessly stabbing daggers into?!

SOMEONE has to be scrubbing these floors and delivering the mail and cooking the meals and doing laundry, and they're probably all DIFFERENT people! My dentist has at least three different receptionists and we can't even get ONE for our court wizard here? A sorcerer's apprentice to take notes? Someone like Sherlock Holmes could get away with just having a housekeeper and taking taxis, sure, but your character is supposed to be a KING?! Why is he answering his own front door? He's going to get assassinated. His SERVANTS should have SERVANTS.

Like, yes, I understand that a lot of servants in certain places at certain times were supposed to make their labor invisible, but there have always been servants who still had to interact directly with the masters of the house?! Yeah, there are potentially really messy ethics here, class divisions are bullshit, but I don't think that completely ignoring the reality that humans have ALWAYS been doing work for other humans is better than just including some well-paid and well-treated servants and employees? Because a complete absence of them, especially where logically for the worldbuilding there MUST be servants (and probably exploited servants, or worse, for some particular worldbuilds to work), often makes me think that your main characters just don't care enough to notice the "lower class" people or know their names.

Also, even Frodo Baggins had a gardener and Samwise Gamgee might be the best damn character in the story?! Sam saved the world?! Servants are PEOPLE. Servants are often the funniest and most interesting characters, tbh, with the most to say about a society and its workings (yes, Discworld is a very good book series, highly recommend), and also the joke of some romantic scene being carefully orchestrated by a stage crew of servants frantically diving into bushes to stay out of sight never gets old to me. Teamwork makes the dream work!

I don't want to gatekeep historical fiction, especially not historical fantasy, because the worlds don't necessarily have to conform to our own and may have magic and characters are often in very unique circumstances, but... sometimes I pick up a story and it's like... "Author, please tell me that you know there is a difference between a butler and a valet?!"

[thechekhov]

Dungeon Meshi Quick Reacts: CH38

Rip to these promising mages. I assume they will not survive this massacre.

IS that where her lungs and kidneys are? Because like. She's huge. Her entire body is behind her. Do you really think she'd keep her vital organs in the little human bulb on the front?

I mean, he has a point. What are you going to do? Fight off more hoardes of dragons?

oh noooo, Kabru.... too bad. That's so unfortunate.... anyway.

It's curious that Laios only got knocked away. He was just as likely to have had his head squished like a grape.

Guys, this is absolutely not the time to be concerned for her privacy.

Yes, queen. Free the tiddy. Murder everyone in this dungeon. I support women's rights and women's wrongs.

.......that's. One way to do that. I guess.

.......what's that rock about.

Oh, I see. That's convenient.

This guy dungeons! Maybe he even dragons.

So we got north (tallmen? dwarves?) and then the easterners.... and now the elves of the west?

He's going to give her to the Americans?! ಠ_ಠ

To be fair, at least they HAD a plan. And they executed it. It's more than you did. I don't mean to point fingers but... at least they... ya know... did something.

Kabru's like 'no, no, hang on, I need to hear what batshit fucked up thing this dude is going to say next, this is important'

Laios is so stressed he broke character.

Then again, maybe it's healthy to let them slug it out a bit. Get it out of their system.

It's true. They wore fitbits and everything.

...hey, hold on a second.

Now hold on a minute.

Damn, this is. Kind of even worse because. I guess I could have guessed that Toshi was just pretending to be polite, like you do. Cultural differences.

But the painful thing is, Laios doesn't seem surprised. He just seems resigned. He's been told before that he's difficult to get along with. To the extent that he doesn't even consider Marcille and Chillchuck his friends? Even though they arguably both care about him? But because Toshiro didn't bother to be deadpan about him being a bit odd at times, Laios thought it meant that was fine.

And that kinda hurts. Like damn. Laios just wanted to make a true connection. And I can't really blame Toshiro either, he was just trying to keep the peace but. Damn.

Free her! Let her do her illegal magics! She deserves it! （︶^︶）

Thoughts:

Senshi just being annoyed about that one last harpy looking for scraps.... like "shoo, this ain't the time"

That gnome seems genuinely nice. I'm sorry Falin squished his pet undyne.

Kabru hugging his..... mage? Girlfriend???? Seems very...one sided. Kinda feel bad for her.

Laios and Toshiro still going at it, I see. Get it allout, boys.

Uhhhhhhhhhh ninja girls.

Aww, doggo.

Last question: Where did the cat go?

Senshi: I can fix that.

Are you all worried because he's finally making sense?!?!

Laios and he punched their singular braincells into several new ones, it seems.

F./....Falin... please give the caterpillar some privacy........

My man, maybe lead with that............

I can't believe Marcille was potentially more forward about her feelings.......

"his pupils are dilated" yes, thank you sherlock. You've finally realized what everyone else who meets Laios feels almost immediately. he's a monster freak club card carrying member. Welcome.

p.....pubby......

As long as he was also inside the dungeon with them.... yes.

The issue with Kabru isn't that he isn't trying his best. It's that Laios isn't trying at all.

On a scale of one to Kabru, how badly do you react to being offered a food you don't want to eat?

......oh no. He's so pathetic it's funny. He's growing on me.

Absolute morons, the pair of them. Immovable object meets unstoppable force. The funniest combination ever. Ghost type and normal type pokemon, forever throwing moves at each other that will never hit. Laios thinking he's made a friend. Kabru just barely stopping himself from killing Laios. Best comedy pair. Tom and Jerry in a can.

Anyway. What a great manga.

[sandersontheside]

What Your Favorite Sanders Sides Ship Says About You

Inspired by Eldena Doubleca5t's excellent series!

Prinxiety: You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of getting dunked on. Also, you probably watched BBC Merlin at some point.

Analogical: Your ideal relationship dynamic is two cats on opposite ends of the same couch.

Anxceit: Your addiction to edgy boys got so bad that one day you decided: [spongebob meme] What’s better than ONE edgy boy? TWO edgy boys!

Dukexiety: I’m not saying you for sure see a therapist, but I am saying with as much love as possible, that maybe you should.

Moxiety: You are touch starved. You don't want to be hugged, you want to use another human being as a weighted blanket.

Logicality: Your ideal relationship dynamic is sitcom wife x sitcom husband.

Intruality: Either "I can fix him" or "I can make him worse" depending on which side you're projecting on

Royality: Your ideal relationship dynamic is himbo x himbo, and you have so much ADHD.

Remrom: 🚨 FBI OPEN UP 🚨

Logince: How's that crush on your much more extroverted best friend going?

Intrulogical: Looking back on your childhood, you can pinpoint The Master from Doctor Who as the beginning of your crippling addiction to the most unhinged characters known to fiction.

Lociet: Half of you came here from shipping L and Light in Death Note, and half of you came here from shipping Sherlock and Moriarty in BBC Sherlock.

Dukeciet: You are a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of committing arson together.

Roceit: Your ideal relationship dynamic is just that tumblr post that's like "go fuck yourself" "fuck me yourself, coward."

Mociet: I'm not saying you for sure have daddy issues, but I am saying I would be surprised if you didn't

LAMP/DLAMP(polycule): You don’t like to make decisions.

Nicomas: And, finally, you are a firm believer in keeping things canon and keeping things wholesome. You just want good things for Thomas, and really, who wouldn't?

[lazycats-stuff]

Hello I hope you are well I wanted to make a request about a little male reader that he is a Green Lantern who ends up in Gotham for something related to space drug trafficking but for unspecified reasons he ends up being very attached to Batman a lot as if he were his son small and the bat family ends up making fun of him for this.

I really apologize if there are any spelling mistakes, English is not my first language and I hope I don't bother you with this request.

Hey, English isn't my first language too, so no worries. Of course I can make this, sorry that this took so long though...

Summary: (Y/N) gets attached to Batman.

Warnings: is the ending rushed? Maybe, nothing major, minor cursing here and there, but only one or two

(Y/N) never knew that if he ever took that ring that he would be a Green Lantern and that it would catapult him into this world of justice, injustice and a gray area of the world of criminals. While it is an incredible experience that most people will never experience, such as flying and having powers, but of course, everything has a bad side.

Such as trauma, PTSD, lack of trust towards people and more so towards humanity as a whole. And (Y/N) lost faith in all creatures as it is, since he is responsible for space as well. More often than not, he would travel to space and he would have to investigate there. More people would think that alien species would be more above of human crimes.

Think again.

They were just as bad, if not more worse. (Y/N) had difficult bumps in his hero life. Being a young hero, all alone, with no one to fall back on is rather difficult. Seeing the awful things in this line of work is hard enough, but not having anyone to fall back onto, it makes it even more harder.

But seeing justice being handed to those who deserve it, seeing the victims being empowered... That's something that keeps him going. And is justice always perfect like people would like to think so?

No. But (Y/N) saw that justice takes care of the innocent. Late or early, it always comes when you least expect it.

And that's what kept him going, to keep helping everyone he could. Through all the hardships... It kept him going.

Soon enough, he was introduced into the Justice League and to Flash, Superman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, Cyborg and of course, the infamous Batman. He soon became a member as well and that came with a shit ton of help.

Better equipment, communication and more information that he previously couldn't get or didn't have access to. It made his life much more easier and the cases moved quicker due to the before mentioned information. (Y/N) was on cloud 9 as it is.

However, there was a slight problem called Batman.

(Y/N) was slightly afraid of the man, but in awe at the same time. Batman was a detective known all over the world. His detective skills are impressive, almost like Sherlock Holmes', which is impressive. And with today's technology, Batman is nothing short of a great detective.

But then again, there is a problem with the man's demeanor. He is scary as hell. The man just pops out out of thin air and makes your blood pressure rise to the moon itself. But he is a good mentor when he needs to be and when someone needs guidance. It's something that fascinates (Y/N) about the duality of the man.

And, (Y/N) doesn't have a father so he may or may not get attached. Either way, (Y/N) has some sort of respect for Batman, but more out of fear.

As of now, (Y/N) was going to kill someone. He was on this drug trafficking case for a long while, bouncing from one point A to a point A,1. He couldn't get to point A to point B directly as it should have been. Oh no. Oh God no. Why would (Y/N) get it so easily?

At last, (Y/N) has made it to the almost point B. That almost point B came down to Earth. More specifically, to Gotham city. To Batman's domain, so to speak. Sure, saying domain is rather dramatic, but everyone knows that Gotham City is off limits for anyone who is not Batman.

So, (Y/N) threaded carefully in the city, looking for the people who were needed in his case. He tried to be as covert as possible. That, everyone, went to shit rather quickly.

" What are you doing here? " Batman asked from behind him in his gravelly voice, making (Y/N) jump into the air like a scared cat, grabbing his chest like an old lady.

" Jesus! What the hell?! " (Y/N) exclaimed, leaning down onto his knees.

" What are you doing here? " Batman asked again in his deep and gravelly voice.

" I'm here on a lead of my drug trafficking case. And before you say something, I'm not leaving until I solve it. I led me everywhere and the last stop is here. " (Y/N) said with determination in his voice, however, inwardly, he was shaking in his boots. Batman is scary, can you blame him?

" There has been a new drug on the streets that has been causing problems here... " Batman noted and then looked at (Y/N) and it took everything in him that he doesn't buckle at this very moment. His glare was piercing.

" It seems we are going to work together. " (Y/N) said and Batman simply called someone and (Y/N) wasn't sure what to make of that. Why is the man so cold?

" We will work together, but I'm taking charge since it's my city here. What do you know about the drug and it's distributers? "

And that's how their chaotic friendship and paternal looking up started. (Y/N) has learnt a few tricks from Batman who has years under his belt as a detective really taught (Y/N) some things that will help him in his investigations later on. (Y/N) didn't think that Batman would be such a great mentor, but he was.

Tough and firm when he needed to be, when (Y/N) felt weak and hopeless in this case. And when (Y/N) was clueless, he would be pointed into the right direction and was allowed to learn on his own, with subtle hints. And reassuring when he felt insecure about his powers.

And in the meantime, he met the entire family, starting with the oldest Dick and ending with Damian, the youngest one in the family and the only biological one in the family.

Everything would have been normal if (Y/N) didn't bond with Bruce so out of nowhere. Almost like he would have been his son. Bruce had absolutely no explanation for this. And neither did (Y/N).

But did either of them complain? No.

Did the boys decide to absolutely make fun of the situation? Hell yes.

Dick would often joke that Bruce has a radar for the orphans, regardless of the region where they lived.

Jason would often compare Bruce to a solitary creature that comes out of its lair to seek them and bring them to the lair. Bruce more often then not rolls his eyes at the remark.

Tim simply calls him a new brother and Damian has often joked that (Y/N) is a long lost son of Bruce.

Of course, all of this was in good nature, no malice behind any of those words. Boys liked (Y/N), not minding it all, but they are still allowed to have fun with the situation.

[furicookiebndz]

Lucifer x !FemReader : My old friend

Hello everyone, it is my first time writing this, i hope it will be good enough, have fun! This fan art isn't mine. Full credits to the amazingly talented artist/creator.

It has been thousands of years since evil began.

Lucifer, whose pride blinded him, attempted to dethrone the creator, only to ultimately fail and be banished from Paradise.

Lilith, who refused to submit to Adam, in turn fled from this magical place, but which hides many facades.

Yet few people know that with them, a third person flew out of Paradise. And even rarer are people who know the cause, 3 to be precise.

However, behind this unusual act lie very dark secrets, seen as…

-Can you stop, Vag'? You're giving me a headache.

The young woman turned her head towards the source of this execrable voice, a spider who was visibly lying carefree on the sofa, arms behind her head, a bored expression on her face.

Refraining from answering him, she continued:

Tragic, some thought it was another rebellious woman, others a fallen angel because of a serious crime, but that wasn't logical, what's worse than to confront the creator?"

-That doesn't help all of us, the young woman noted, running her hand through her hair, frustrated.

-It would be beneficial to have her on our side, especially if she has such a significant influence on the world of the living and beyond, Charlie concluded thoughtfully.

-But she hid from the world, living as a hermit. Many think it's a myth, but given what's been happening lately, I believe it's much more present than sinners think.

Vaggie rubbed her temples, trying to come up with an idea.

-Who the hell are you talking about? I hate it when you pretend to be Sherlock and leave me like the old cookie in the back of the cupboard.

-Are you interested in what we do? retorted Vaggie sarcastically

-No, more about why you were busting my balls, joked Angel.

-You don't even have one, asshole, mumbled quietly Husk, taking a sip of his cheap booze.

-Want to check~? It is free for you kitty cat.

-Not even for a thousand balls, growled quietly Husk, who was beginning to lose his patient.

-Ouuh finally a price there is progress, Daddy, the spider sent him a kiss

Alastor, who was reading a book by the fireplace, decided to speak

-Charlie, Darling, you seem concerned about this person Let me see…

He seemed surprised for a moment, before smiling more, if possible.

-My my, what a terrible coincidence. The person you are looking for is one of the most sought after. Didn't Lucifer tell you about Lady (Y/N)?

-Um… We're not exactly talking about all that-

“Daddy issues,” Husk muttered.

Alastor continued:

-As reported in this document, she flew away shortly after your parents. She was a person living in Heaven, she was not human, but not an angel entirely though, she had two pairs of wings, although she is the appearance of a mortal, yet she had her own power, not to be underestimated. She embodied humor, justice and determination. In short, all these things that are way too boring-

-Cut it short, Alastor, Vaggie said, snapping her fingers.

-But when Lucifer challenged God, she did not follow him, not because she had to beat him, but because he knew just as well as she did that what he was doing was wrong. For the first time in her life she felt an immense disappointment in the love he had once inspired in her, and the semblance of a relationship that was perhaps tending to end disappeared with the appearance of the first demon, your father, Charlie.

However, you are aware that shortly after the creation of Lilith, she quickly became friends with your mother, and when she flew away from Paradise, and she learned the cause, she entered in a black anger, so black that Gabriel had difficulty in containing it, Until then, she had always been obedient, never contesting the decisions, which were of infallible Justice, but this departure had torn away part of her herself. She confronted the lord, she tried to rally the others to her cause, but nothing changed. Disappointed, she left that place, and no one ever saw her again.

There was a heavy silence for a moment, before Angel said:

-So…Is she still a virgin?

Vaggie rolled her eyes before Charlie had an idea:

I'm sure she's not that far away. Maybe I should ask my father to contact her again. She must care about him, at least I hope so, and if I convince her, Gabriel won't be able to object!

Vaggie refrained from adding a comment, she knew it was too good to be able to do it, but in front of her girlfriend's adorable face, she couldn't refuse anything.

______________________________________________________________

-No, Lucifer said firmly, before Charlie could even finish his idea.

-But dad-

-End of discussion, I don't want to hear anything, he turned around and mechanically squeezed the rubber duck in his hand, like an anti-stress ball.

Lucifer seemed elsewhere, deep in thought. His friend, his old friend…

.

.

.

“Luciferrrrr!” A burst of joy appeared as she walked towards him, a smile on her lips, a book in her hands.

Lucifer as usual had a lyre in his hands. He looked up at Y/N and smiled.

One discussion led to another, he shared his ideas about the mortal world, while she agreed with some and shared her opinion on others. They would sometimes just stay silent, or she would read aloud from a book, and he would then accompany her with his lyre.

Such a beautiful memory…

.

.

.

Why Lucifer?! Why did you do this?

This same friend was there with her eyes filled with tears, disappointed in him.

Lucifer looked down. One mistake, just one mistake, had caused him to lose those he considered family, and his closest friend.

He wanted to tell her that it was just a misunderstanding, that it was for the best, but the damage was already done.

He took Lilith's hand and without a word, left for their new home.

The young woman, in tears, could only watch them leave, the man she loved and her friend, without being able to do anything, because her principles prevented her. Gabriel placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, and said nothing. If she knew, he couldn't imagine how she would have reacted

.

.

.

-Dad?

Lucifer seemed to come out of his thoughts and focused on a family portrait. Lilith was already gone, after their separation he only had his daughter left, and after a second of thought he sighed and said:

-I'll see what I can do…

-It's true? Oh thank you Dad, thank you thank you thank you!, cried Charlie enthusiastically.

She took him in her arms, and Lucifer said to himself that finally, if having a hug from his daughter meant having to seek the 7 rings of Hell and even the beyond, he would do it without complaining.

Now all that remained was to find it, the most complicated part…

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lucifer, Charlie and the hotel members thought for several days, using all their knowledge and powers to find her. If she was neither in Hell, nor in Heaven, or even in the mortal world, she must be between the latter options-

Lucifer suddenly had an idea, remembering a conversation they had shared long ago, and he cast an incantation, which opened a portal to a world- no, a unique place, so messy and blurry, and yet so… familiar, as if he were…

“In the middle of a dream,” Charlie whispered softly. The rest of the team followed her, looking around curiously. Lucifer asked himself so many questions, was it a place where souls rested between life and death? He did not know it. After all, the soul left the body for a while when it slept, that would explain the place.

-Who are you? I sense human souls, but something else…

They saw several women advancing, of great beauty, similar to fairies, but armed, ready to defend themselves, if it was not for another who stopped them by raising her hand, she advanced slowly, and Lucifer recognized her completely. right now.

-(Y/N)..Lucifer seemed upset to see her, and tried to pull himself together by talking to himself. "Ok, Ok. It's going to be okay buddy, you can do it, you can do it", When he met her gaze, he lost all his courage and hid behind Charlie.

-Dad!

-What? I-I'm just covering your back Charlie.

-At least what I thought of you is true, you're just a sissy Lucifer, Alastor sneered.

You looked at him for a moment, the man you had loved for thousands of years, it was..strange. You didn't know whether you should greet him or hit him.

-Lucifer, what is the honor of this visit worth to me? In 10,000 years you have never had the decency to come visit me.

Sarcasm. Something unusual about you, he couldn't help but admire you. Your two pairs of wings were now grey, but your eyes were still this soft (e/c) shade, but now full of resentment, and perhaps.. mockery?

-And you, you must be his daughter, mhh?

You moved closer to her and observed her suspiciously, while she was sweating profusely, and Vaggie seemed on the edge on attacking you, and to her surprise, you smiled widely and took her in your arms, with surprising strength.

-My lord you are his carbon copy, so pretty~, you squish her cheek cheeks and gush about her, while she laughs awkwardly.

Everyone was stunned by how fast the tension dissipates, and the women behind you giggle, seemingly aware by how fast your emotions tend to change. Lucifer smiles, maybe he still had a chance..

-But you seem so polite, unlike some, you cast a dark look at Lucifer, and greeted the others with a sympathetic and curious look, their offering to sit down for a while to talk.

...maybe not finally.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

-If I understood everything, you created a hotel to rehabilitate sinners… and are trying to convince Heaven, is that right?

She nodded and Lucifer tried to add something, but you stopped him:

-I don't speak with traitors and liars, especially if they forget to send me a life message for eons.

Lucifer doesn't say anything wanting to make anything worse. He knew he was wrong, and sighed heavily.

(Y/N)-1 Lucifer-0.

-Damn, this girl is awesome, Angel whispered excitedly.

Vaggie continued:

-Lady (Y/N), you still have decent relationship with heaven.Could you try talking to some highers-up about it? Like Gabrie-

-No, this thing is no longer part of my circle of close friends, I can still try to talk about it again with Sera and Emily, but I can't do anything with the other weirdo.

Charlie felt hopeless, and she took your hands and looked at you with a miserable expression.

-I beg you, you must speak to him, my people are dying every year at the hands of the exorcists, and I-I cannot stand by and do nothing. Can you try..?

At his beaten puppy look, you widened your eyes, it was exactly-

Please don't tell them where I was, Lucifer pleaded with adorable eyes. You sighed but smiled, nodding your head.

-Well, i will. But I'm not promising anything though-

-Thank you thank you thank you, she hugged you, and you hugged her back with a smile.

Lucifer felt his heart beat faster, these two women who are precious to him have finally met, and got along better than he expected.

Now all he had to do was sort out one last problem.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Explanations were made. You listened patiently, and after a while you answered:

-Why Lucifer, didn't you tell me before? I-I thought I was your friend.

Lucifer held her gaze, and for the first time in millennia he took his courage in both hands and took hers:

-I didn't want to see your disappointed look, I know I made a mistake, but I only thought about doing the right thing. And I-

-You got scared?

He nodded, and you sighed:

-I don't blame you, at least not anymore.

He raised his eyes, feeling a bit of hope, and feeling Charlie's encouraging look, he continued:

-So, can we try again? I mean our relationship- Well our friendship!

He blushed slightly and you chuckled softly:

-Yes, always Lucifer.

[raina-at]

Empty

Bakers, again.

----

Hospital tea is awful. Hospital food is worse. Sometimes Sherlock thinks hospitals provide awful food on purpose, to keep patients motivated to get well as soon as possible just to escape the food.

He knows it’s not true, of course. Hospital kitchens cook for the lowest common denominator, and more often than not, sick people don’t have the most refined palette anyway.

Still, there is no excuse for this croissant. It’s dry, tasteless, hard as a rock, and the jam inside is present on a molecular level at best. This pastry could be qualified as a hate crime against the French, or a human rights violation.

Or, Sherlock is angry and trying to take it out on the croissant instead of yelling at the person lying in the hospital bed he’s currently sitting next to. 

Or maybe both.

It’s fuck o’clock in the morning, as John would say, and quite honestly, Sherlock would rather be anywhere else. If he has to be here, the least this hospital could do for him is a decent cup of tea and a mediocre pastry, instead of distilled bathwater and this abomination. 

There’s an audible groan from the bed. Blue eyes blink open and look blearily at Sherlock.

“What the actual fuck…” 

“Good bloody morning to you too, I hope you feel like shit,” Sherlock says, his voice as brittle as his smile.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Harry groans, closing her eyes against the dim light. “And where the fuck is here?”

“Glad you asked,” Sherlock says in a mockingly cheerful tone. “We just had a thoroughly delightful night together, you, me, and your brother, who’s just stepped out to phone your work and make up some bullshit excuse why you can’t be in today. See, it all started at one on the bloody morning, when your neighbour phoned John to inform him that he heard a loud bump and crash from your flat. Your brother decided he couldn’t just wait until morning to see whether you’d actually managed to off yourself this time, and so we went to check on you. We found you delightfully unconscious, lying in a pool of your own blood from a nasty head wound.”

“I must have tripped and fallen,” Harry mutters rebelliously. 

“We found this next to you.” Sherlock holds up an empty vodka bottle. “Coincidence? Probably not.”

Harry looks away, turns her head towards the window. “Fuck off,” she mutters, quietly defiant like always. 

“Oh, believe me, I would love to. But as long as you insist on dragging your brother through hell, I’m along for the ride, I’m afraid.”

“I didn’t phone him! I never asked for his help! Why does he always have to stick his fucking nose into my business? Who asked him?” Harry’s voice is raspy and raw from the alcohol and emotion, and she’s glaring daggers at Sherlock.

“Would you rather he let you die?” Sherlock asks acerbically. “Is that how selfish you are? Don’t you realise what that would do to him?”

“Yes, and who the fuck cares what it does to me,” she mutters.

“You are an adult,” Sherlock says, leaning closer and holding Harry’s angry gaze. “And furthermore, you are not my responsibility. But your brother damned well is, and it’s my job to protect and support him to the best of my ability. And quite frankly, he’s at the end of his tether, Harriet. I’m not sure how much more of this he can take.”

“You’re such a fucking hypocrite, you know that, right?” she whispers, tears gathering in her eyes. “You act all high and mighty, like you’re so much better than me, when you’re one fucking weak moment away from ending up right down here next to me.”

Sherlock rubs a tired hand over his face. She’s right, of course. He’s a junkie. A sober junkie, but there is no cure for addiction. He will always be tempted. He will always be one needle prick away from the abyss. But that is very much not the point.

“You’re right, of course. I understand the rock bottom you’re hitting every time you disappear into that bottle better than most people. And I’ve been where you are. I’ve bitten the hand that tried to help me up, again and again. I regarded it as entirely my brother’s problem that he didn’t just wash his hands of me when I was at my lowest. But if he’d done that, I would be dead. And he would have to carry that guilt for the rest of his life. I don’t want that for John. Do you?”

She looks away, tears now streaming freely down her face. He has little sympathy, because he suspects she mainly feels sorry for herself, not for anyone else. 

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” she mutters. 

Sherlock sighs, feeling his anger slowly drain out of him. This is pointless. Addiction is complicated, nobody knows this better than him. No rousing speech will change the grip the bottle has on her. And all the love she has for her brother—and she does love him, as much as she resents him at times—won’t make her get sober. He can’t articulate, to this day, why he managed to drag himself out of that black hole. Resources helped, sure. But he doesn’t know what changed, what shifted within himself, to make it possible for him to accept the help that was offered to him. 

And nothing will keep John from extending a hand, again and again, until she’s ready to take it.

“I don’t know,” he finally admits. “I…” he looks down at his hands, then admits quietly, “I can’t fix this for him. I want to, and I can’t.” 

“I’m trying, Sherlock. I’ll keep trying. I’ll probably fail again, but believe me, I am trying,” she says quietly. 

Sherlock doesn’t answer, but he gives her a short nod as acknowledgement, because he believes her. It doesn’t necessarily make a difference, and he hates how much she keeps hurting John, but he does believe her. 

She’s trying. She’ll keep trying. They all will keep trying.

And maybe someday, they can break this vicious circle. Maybe someday, she’ll stop hurting John and Sherlock can forgive her. 

Until then, he’s here, because John needs him to be. And as much as he would like to fight and slay all of John’s dragons for him, that’s never going to happen. Life doesn’t work that way. But what he can do is fight alongside him. And that’s what they’ll do. They’ll fight this dragon together until they slay it. 

“Don’t eat the croissants,” he tells her, as close to forgiveness as he will get as long as she keeps hurting John. “I’ll make you some topfengloatschen later.”

“Five years in, and you still can’t fucking pronounce golatsche,” Harry says, but she’s smiling at him in silent gratitude. 

“Shut up,” he says, returning the smile.

Truce restored, he thinks. I wonder when we will finally have peace.

----

Tags under the cut as always, please let me know if you want to be tagged or untagged.

@calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @jrow @peanitbear @jolieblack @meetinginsamarra @helloliriels @keirgreeneyes @lisbeth-kk @friday411 @givemesherbet-blog-blog @weeesi @thalialunacy @thegildedbee @dapetty @salmonsown

[weeesi]

Nightmare - May Prompt (15)

+

cw: major character death

+

“S’alright.”

“Oh god, no. Please. Don’t do this.”

This cannot be happening. This is worse than the worst versions of his nightmares, the ones where he’s shot to death in Afghanistan, where he doesn’t hand Sherlock his phone, he doesn’t move into 221B, he doesn’t fall in love, the ones where Sherlock jumps and stays dead. 

This is Sherlock actually dying in John’s arms. 

“You’re Sherlock Holmes, you’re indestructible,” and the first tear leaks out of the corner of his eye as his voice breaks. His heart’s already done, a portent of things to come.

Through the pain Sherlock laughs, mostly a gurgling gasp now. Many injuries are survivable. This one is not. John knows they won’t be getting Chinese at the end of Baker Street tonight. 

“I wish,” is all Sherlock says. His eyes droop a little, anchored still on John. He’s tired.

John presses firmly over the wound until his fingers turn white, then stain a deep red.

“You’re not going to die. You can’t die.”

Sherlock breathes. Slowly smiles. 

“Sorry, John.” His fading moonlight eyes. “Human…human being.”

A love like theirs will live beyond the next moment, will transcend the singular second when one of them has to leave the other behind. 

Their love is not forever. 

What they have reaches far beyond a word like that.

+

Today is my birthday! For me, today, tell someone you love 'em.

Thank you to @calaisreno for the fun prompt series! Tags in replies. Thanks for reading! <3

[issa-pheonyx]

Yandere-sub!Dante X GN!Reader🔪🌶️ [DMC3]

𝗜𝘁 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗗𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗻 𝗮 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗰𝘂𝗹𝗮𝗿 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂. 𝗟𝗲𝘁𝘀 𝘀𝗲𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗳𝘆 𝗼𝗯𝘀𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗱𝗲𝗺𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗼𝘁𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂~😈🌚

▌│█║▌║▌║ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ ║▌║▌║█│▌

-I'm sure you already where this is going. Come on, this is Dante. Son of Sparda and human mother, Eva. Twin brother, Vergil. He's got it all and as much he doesn't want to be reminded by his father from the power he holds...you seem to reflect the human side of his to live life even if it means being a pain in the ass to you LMAO

-Anyways, it is never boring with him nor his affections. He's got that arm around your shoulder walking with you on whatever troll or shit talking he's got going with, the spaces between you is inches away, holding you close when danger is too close to you, shooting all the demons away from you when you are injured (more like a scratch on the shoulder, but whatever feeds your delulu, Dante), and so on

-As much as you want to hate this guy it is impossible, because he is naturally funny that you can't help, but smile or burst out laughing. He is aware of it, obviously, and there are times he is also smiling and laughing with you. He would have to hold onto your arm as he is almost on the floor dying laughing or hugging you down and you're both crying from laughing on the floor. He is such a comedian

-Sure, when you try to comfort him he just brushes it off being the tough guy and funny jokes, but you were the only one to push him out of that barrier making him obsessed trust you and fall for you so quickly. He never had that kind of treatment from anybody besides his mother, but now that she is gone, he sees you as a sign of hope for not only to heal...but, to let him know that the part of him is still human just like you

-He is protective of you since you are a full blooded human. He does not want you to be injured regardless how minor or major it is. He wants you spotless from any pain. At first it was cute, but it got out of hand when he was so pushy about it that you can barely do any patrol killing demons intruding human spaces

WARNING!!! Spicy after this thread [MDNI🔞]

-Listen...actually hear me out, okay? This man does not feel pain. He has taken hits from humans by their punches, kicks-everything (yeah no shit, Sherlock). JUST LISTEN-pain is nothing to him. Fucking slap him in the face when you ride him, pull his hair back when you're breaking his back, spank him and he will give you a fucking devious smile telling you that was nothing just to piss you off

-Seeing you pissed off gets him so turned on, because he turns into a brat and challenge you that you can't do shit to him...cut to him tied up and having ass red and hot from the spanking, gagged that his drool soaks on the rag, his legs malfunctioning from climaxing so much. So, when he is purposely trying to piss you off...just beware of it

-Now he wouldn't make you jealous as he does have his way of trolling such flirty encounters aka Nevan for example, however he is the one who would be jealous. Plus, it is much more worse when he finds out his brother takes a liking of you (that's for another day though~). So, what he would do is have this demon death grip on you and would nuzzle against your skin-wherever it is exposed to let other demons of all kinds that his scent is now latched onto you and they should back off. Your scent on him? Well...he has special souvenirs kept back in the shop safely

-He is willing to breed you or you breed him. He would be more than happy to receive both. Will fucking be on cloud nine that after breeding you or being bred by you that you hover his face for him to clean or you get down to business to clean him up. His arms will be locked on those legs, so don't worry about suffocating him he can obviously handle it. He will grind his ass back into your face to push your tongue in deeper in his hole

-Sucking you off or eating you out is his favorite thing. He wants to gag and choke on your cock that it becomes so sloppy that you just grab his fucking head and face fuck him until you cum your hot nut inside his throat or pull out to cum on his face and the leftovers on his tongue dripping out. Grip on his hair and roll your hips as he is eating your pussy having his long tongue licking the folds, slipping the tongue inside, his nose swiping on your clit like a credit card (SORRY I CAN'T-), and when you squirt your juices that he moves away a little with his tongue out to have it splash on his face and have some land inside his mouth

▌│█║▌║▌║ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ L̳͈͉̅̊ȍ̸̢̢̮͚̐̚v̸̵̝͙͆̈ͤę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ M̶̷̲̊ͥ͋͟ę̷̵̧̖̫̗̆̊ ║▌║▌║█│▌

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴! 𝗜 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝗻𝗷𝗼𝘆𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝘁. 𝗠𝘆 𝘂𝗽𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘀 𝗱𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗿 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗦𝗹𝗲𝗲𝗽 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗹~🖤🫣

[kingofvipers]

The Curse of the Fever

x male reader

Relationship: platonic

Characters: Crowley, Aziraphale, male reader

Prompt: "Person A takes care of a sick Person B" Person A: M/n Person B: Crowley and Aziraphale

Description: Crowley and Aziraphale get sick and ask M/n for help. M/n takes care of them.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Neither of them know what happened. Why were their nose stuffy, why did they feel hot, why were they too tired to stand up, why did their throats hurt?

It was a normal day in London except that Aziraphel had closed his library because him and Crowley were feeling weird. And by weird I mean horrible. Crowley was laying on the couch whining and complaining that he was hot and his throat hurt, and Aziraphel was on his chair, with a headache barely being able to speak on the phone. Barely being able to even grab the phone as he spoke into it.

"M/n, we need your help" he said in a very tiny voice almost whispering.

"Are you ok? You don't sound so good" replied M/n, concerned for the angel's well being.

"Could you please come to the library, is an emergency"

"Sure I'll be there right away"

In about 30 minutes M/n was already at the library and once he entered he was met with a whining Crowley and a scared Aziraphel.

"Oh thank heaven you're here, I think we have been cursed" he said in a very scared and alarmed yet low voice. "Ok, first calm down, explain to me what happened"

And explain he did, Aziraphale explained how this morning he had woken up with a soar throat and was so tired that he could barely get out of bed, and how hot he constantly was.

"Crowley, are you having the same symptoms?"

"Yeah" moaned Crowley in pain.

"You know what I think? I think Gabriel, or Beelzebub cursed us" Aziraphel stated to which Crowley nodded.

"Ok, Sherlock, lets not jump to conclusions, first of all" M/n exclaimed rolling his eyes "Secondly, you're not cursed."

"We're not?"

"No, you're not cursed, your sick. What you just described is a fever, there is nothing to be scared about, your not gonna die."

Aziraphale seemed much more relieved realizing that you knew what it was and that its nothing death threatening, but that feeling was replaced with confusion. "But, why are we sick? I mean, I know its normal for humans, but were not- Crowley please all this whining is making my headache worse!" He exclaimed at the demon who just took a pillow from the couch and stuffed his face in it while still whining and moaning.

"As I was saying, were not human, so how come we got sick?"

M/n thought for a moment. It was true, they weren't human and they have never gotten sick before, so why now? It was too hard of a question to answer in the moment so he just sighed ant told Aziraphale to not worry about it right now.

"What's important right now is that the both of you rest and get better, I'm going to go out and buy some medicine for you guys"

"Thank you so much M/n"

And just like that, M/n was stuck taking care of Aziraphale and Crowley. Never has M/n regretted something so much in his life. He has worked with babies more compliant than them. Aziraphale wasn't much of a problem, he ate his food, rested and even though it was clear he didn't like it, he took his medicine with no problem. Crowley on the other hand, was a nightmare to work with, especially while trying to make him take his medicine.

"Crowley you have to take it!!!!"

"NO!!!" the demon yelled while slapping the spoon of medicine out of your hands and on to the floor. "CROWLEY!!!!!" Fights like these kept going until you decide enough is enough.

"Crowley~~"M/n said in a sing song voice making him look up from his blanket. "I know that its been hard for you being sick so I got you your favorite order of coffee"

As soon as he said coffee, Crowley pushed the blanket to the side and made grabby hands. You handed him the cup of coffee and he took it taking a sip of it. It tasted horrible and he was about to spit it out if it wasn't for M/n jumping on top of him and keeping the cup to his mouth making him drink the entire thing. He had put the medicine in the coffee so that it was easier to trick Crowley into drinking it.

"There, that wasn't so hard was it?" Mocked M/n.

"I hate you"

--------------------------------

By the end of the week, Aziraphale and Crowley were feeling a lot better. Aziraphale was working again and Crowley was, well, he was doing whatever it is that he does in the day.

"Thank you so much M/n, I don't know how I could ever repay you" Aziraphale said hugging M/n. "You don't have to repay me, but Crowley could pay for my dinner at the ritz to make up for all that nightmare he made me go through" he responded turning his head towards Crowley who just looked at him annoyed.

"You made me drink medicine coffee, I think we're even"

"No I don't think we are-ACHU!!"

The room went silent as the supernatural beings stared at M/n confused.

"ACHU!!!"

"Are you alright M/n?" asked Aziraphale concerned.

"I'm sure it's noth-ACHU!!" Aziraphale brought his hands to the sneezing man's face, retracting it immediately. "Your burning up, I think maybe you caught our fever. Not to worry though, we shall take care of you just as you took care of us" he said almost seeming excited.

"Oh that not necessary" M/n said before getting cut off by Crowley who was wearing a sly smirk on his face. "Nonsense, we insist"

M/n sneezed again, and realized that there is no way his getting out of this. His care was now on Aziraphale's unqualified and Crowley's vengeful hands.

"Oh, no"

[not-that-dillinger]

“You shouldn’t be out here alone this late.”

The voice is echoed... garbled like it had been through too many layers of distortions gone wrong. The only tell that there was someone nearby on this forsaken piece of digital terrain was a flicker of something dark... cape?... or fabric maybe... just out of sight.

"It... isn't safe... for programs."

He'd had one of those days, where he'd been in not so great a mental space after a board meeting and couldn't go home but the walls of Encom tower felt more oppressive than safe like they usually did, and that perhaps made Ed a little more reckless. He'd gone for a walk, hoping to burn the last of his spoons so that maybe he could just go home and pass out.

He hadn't realized how far he'd walked until he found himself leaning heavily on Colossus, blinking up at the unlit sign of Flynn's arcade. He'd never really thought much about the place; he hadn't been allowed as a kid when it was open, and the one time his father's assistant caught him trying to sneak in with friends, he'd been... discouraged from returning.

Perhaps it was Flynn's old files he'd found on the Encom server that he kept thinking about, that drew him here. The files had been filled with ramblings that lined up so much with the angry rants his father used to have, and Ed couldn't stop thinking about them. He stood in front of the abandoned arcade, and something clicked into place. He realized he might have the missing puzzle piece to solve the mystery of where Flynn disappeared to.

Sherlock Holmes and Nancy Drew had always been a worse influence on him than his father made any of his childhood friends out to be; picking the lock on the door was trivial, and he quickly found the hidden basement.

It took him little time to find the Grid.

It took even less time for them to find him, though they didn't know what to do with the massive dog that had come with him.

They'd stripped him out of his clothes, put him in a light up suit, and given him a disc. They'd put Colossus in a suit and given him a disc as well. And then they marched him to Clu.

Clu had hoped to use him to lure his user out of hiding, and Ed laughed. Rescue his nemesis's son from certain death? Yeah right.

It was the sight of the test tube-looking prison, large enough to contain an adult human, more than Clu's plans to turn him into mindless soldier under his control, that had sent Ed into a panic.

Colossus had always been gentle with other people, and Ed had never seen the dog snap, much less bite someone, but Ed's panic must have triggered something, because the next thing he knew, the guards that had been restraining him were on the ground, and he was sprinting down the hall with Colossus, Clu dropping yellow voxels from the stump of his wrist as he pursued after them.

Ed didn't remember much about the escape, but an explosion or ten later he was hiding in an abandoned building in a darkened sector of the city.

---

That had been... Ed had no idea how long ago. It felt like months. They'd probably given up the search for him, if there even was one when he went missing. The darkened sector made an ideal hiding spot. It seemed like Clu or his forces couldn't track data there, though Ed also couldn't access the Grid to write scripts, execute command lines, or draw energy, which meant that Ed had to venture out in order to obtain energy or code anything he needed. And that meant he had to leave Colossus, since the dog was instantly recognizable.

Regardless, he'd learned how his disc connected him to the Grid, and had figured out how to use it to change his outfit to something slightly closer to his usual clothing with a floor length cloak, and had coded a swordstick with a pigeon-head for a hilt to defend himself with.

It was his third time venturing out, in need of more energy for both himself and Colossus, that he'd been found.

Ed froze, leaning heavily on the swordstick. He was having a low energy day, but he could fight, if it came to it.

He shifted his weight off the cane ever so slightly. "Is that so?" he asked, voice intentionally kept even and calm. "The same could be said of you."

[swimming-karyss]

I've been thinking about the screwed magnetic fields of the grand line recently, and while that train of thought didn't lead anywhere, the phrase I liked - "an invisible birdcage" - really applied to Sabo's situation nicely.

I mean, it's obvious how much influence Sabo's parents have on him, but have you ever thought that Sabo never felt freedom while he was staying in Goa kingdom? And it's even before he was brought back to his family and properly realized just how messed up nobles are!

We've seen multiple times that his parents treat him as something they own, that he unquestionably belongs to them, and even after running away to the Gray Terminal the feeling of being tied down never went away. It seems like Sabo internalised that so much, that he didn't even realise that he was free this whole time! He was free to choose his future, he was free to choose his family! The only thing holding them down was that they were unprepared to set sail,amd even then they could always leave if they wanted! As Sabo did - by stealing the boat.

And yet he still longed for freedom, to be "anywhere but here". We can see it in his design - he lives among the 'scum' of the Gray Terminal, and yet he still dressed as a noble, he wears a waistcoat and a top hat which reminds us of the fashion of the high town and especially his father, and his cravat is tied tightly around his neck. His life really was suffocating for him. Even if he was physically away from his family he still could feel their influence, though he was outside the city wall, outside of their reach! And he ran away 5 years ago! He's spent so much time living there, that his noble upbringing has faded - he felt compassion towards the people of the gray terminal, which nobles don't even consider human; he even put someone else's happiness before his own - which is unheard of in the noble circles; he has defeated men twice his size, fearlessly charged into battle while nobles don't want to get their hands dirty. And yet he was powerless when met with violence from his father, showing that despite all this time, despite how much he's changed he still was in that invisible birdcage, unable to act under the influence of his father. (which is why he leaves again)

Even Ace and Luffy feel that:

And it's really sad that Ace says that Sabo was never able to grasp freedom, because even if briefly, he did. With you two :") But he could never feel freedom as long as he stayed in the country where people are treated no better than trash, and the shadow of his family and Goa's walls lingered above him.

And a couple of hundred chapters later we see the extent of his parents' grasp! Even with amnesia this deep-seated feeling of confinement never left him. (Though I do think that it's not just the abuse from his parents but also his disgust with nobles as a whole: the burning of the Gray Terminal and nobles' indifference to it clearly affected him a lot)

And what's worse, now he can't even identify what's wrong! I mean, it's clear that his parents were abusive, you don't need to be a Sherlock to figure that out, but the specific details are lost. Think about it! He ended up on a ship with people who at first didn't really want anything to do with him - not out of malice, they just have more important things at the moment; and then in an organisation(an army) where your value as a soldier is based on your performance(like rising through ranks and such). He doesn't know that his parents equated his worth with his usefulness, and the revs don't know that the boy being so eager to help isn't just a rightheous motivation. He needed to be sure that their efforts on getting him to health weren't in waste, to be useful, so that the only people he knows won't just leave him, plus pair it with his moral values, distaste of nobles, longing for freedom... – no wonder he is the second-in-command of the entire army by the age 22!

This guy's love language is acts of service, but no one (not even Sabo himself) realises that it stems from his screwed upbringing and fear of being cast away if he's not of use.

Ok, to be fair, it's mostly based on the flashbacks - I haven't finished my reread to look in depth at him as an adult yet! After all we've only seen point A(his childhood) and point B(adulthood) with the journey between them obscured. He does seem to be faring well tho! He takes his job seriously when needed, but also fucks around when he wants to - even if ppl around him show displeasure with that! Good for him.

Same with Koala actually! It's so nice to see her being able to express her feelings so visibly! Be it positive or negative. And I think it's cute, that while Sabo is both the common reason and victim of her outbursts of emotion, he never berates her for it! He's not thrilled, but he's not complaining either!

[trippygalaxy]

Hello hello! I just read your MoonGod!FD×SunDeity! I couldn't help myself so sorry for sliding and nerding in;;

The funfact I love the most is thag moon shines thanks to the light it gets from the sun. It makes me think of the quote how the light it gets reflects the love of the Sun

Unlike the Moon, the Sun gave more importance to their duty. When they met the Moon who've shown his admiration for them, the Sun's feeling never changed but it gave more consideration.

Despite his hair, his moonlight, that shone has been cut away, the Sun now did their duty with the Moon in their mind so may the human he admired may still find hope and their way in the darkest of night.

Speaking of humanity, the moon covers a little nowadays but the (ancient) moon acted as a second shield to the Earth's atmosphere. One of the reason of craters, which are created by the impact of asteroids and meteor.

FD was chosen to fight humans but what if it's also to protect other humans? But he is not who he originally supposed to be. What they've done to him was worse than torture... And with no one to guard the moon, it lost its former form and now can barely protect the Earth.

I love the story about the solar eclipse. Sun's grieving is so intense... If the Sun makes you go blind, then the Moon cries for them too.

Moon and ocean are often depicted as lovers because how the ocean is affected by the moon... but imagine if those were the silent cries of the Fierce Diety.

He can barely remember but the sentiments remains. The moon, part of him, his home, now unreachable. His once blue eyes thrown away to the ocean turned into the cries of ceaseless wave and his voice became the roaring wind because the sky clouded his beloved Sun.

Cyclones are an attempt of the Fierce Deity going back to his beloved.

But when there sun shines on the sea, it's calm like singing a song and reflects its lights sparkling on the water's surface like once did and forever will in the Deity's eyes.

Even if he can't see his beloved Sun again, he can still feel their warmth endlessly embracing him.

Okay, this turned rather fluffy... I don't mind if you put dosage sprinkles of angst in it.

I LITERALLY LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE THIS AND YOU AND I NOW OWE MY LIFE TO YOU AND YOUR BEAUTIFUL BRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DO NOT BE SORRY!!! I WELCOME YOU WITH OPEN ARMS INTO MY INBOX ANYTIME!!!!!!!!

Now, if you wish for me to grab this gift and sprinkle drown it in angst? I might be able to do that for you :3

The deity, once so joyful and calm, now is nothing more than a vengeful husk of the god he once was. He was once a protector, the shield against the emptiness of the void, the one who guided those with his light when they were shrouded in darkness, their man-made flickers into nothing but ambers. But now? Now, he painted the land he longed to walk upon red with the blood of the mortals he once protected. Now, he brings death and war with every swing of his intertwined blade.

He walked in the dull moon light, his skin prickling with bitter anger as he bathed his blood soaked form in the light.

No god had felt this much blood under their nails. No god had ever dared to harm and torture the mortals like he had. No god had ever...Avoided the sun's gaze as much as he had.

Others thought he found comfort in the night. Others found it ironic he only attacked under the gaze of his now battered and broken celestial body that hangs in the skin. Other simply thought it was a strategic war plan. But not one thought of how the deity shivered at the thought of acts he'd dared to commit under his lover's rays of light.

No matter how far his mind goes, no matter the lack of memories or emotions he looses over the years, he refuses to plan attacks under the sun's watchful eye. For he wouldn't dare slaughter the mortals the sun loved so dearly. He wouldn't dare become a monster to his Sun like he had to his mortals.

@link-or-sherlock HERES THAT ASK I WAS SCREAMING ABOUT!! /POS

[illiteratt]

Feb 5 '24

I hate the power you hold on me

Of all the people, of all the "flawless" you, you fucking idiot come into my life hold it between your lips and act like it doesn't even matter to you

You have the power to bite it, to kiss it, either kill it or make it. And what i cant believe is that i made that decision, knowingly. Not knowingly, wrong word, i didn't know shit about what it could become. I gave you that chance, willingly. I could've ignored you, treated you as a friend, say piss of to you. I could have, i did that before. What makes you so fucking different? Why do you stand out between all the people in my life? I love them all, but even before i realised this power of yours (that i love you, unfortunately) you were always a bit different werent you? The closest one, the one that holds me while my mind doesnt even feel real and i dont feel the earth under my feet. I can cry to you. The one that sits next to me all the fucking time (really, how did i not understand it sooner) (you couldnt even tell your own feelings sherlock, shut up) and the absurd thi g isi wanted that too, maybe a bit more subconsciously than you.

Now i am addictive and you dont give a shit. Of course you do, i know you do, i know... you care about me you love me, i know. Thats not what im talking about. I dont even know what im talking about but you heard these speeches a lot from me didn't you? Transparent as hell, im weak, i know. Oh the way I say" i kno" must be so irritating. How do you even stand me. Yeah you know everything good for you dear me now shut the fuck up.

Im not that desperate am i? Not for you, couldnt be. You dont care. You think about me when im actually there, you love me when im around. Maybe thats just normal human behaviour, how could i know?

I know, (again, great) we are in this together. I shouldnt decide your feeli gs for you or how you should treat me worse. I know you care, i feel you care. I look a bit one sided, not from my side tho, yours. Thats why im toxic. I create a a you that hates me in my own mind because i believe you should. How could you not. I hate myself, thats enough evidence for me. I make that decision for you, told you, im toxic. Really. Bad for not only you but everyone around me probably with my self destructive little brain. Oh and how i act like i do t care with all my "i know" s. I know right? I know fucking everything, right, yeah, totally explains why im miserable.

You just hold more power on me than i do on you, and that scares the shit out of me.

5 Şubat

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Five Fics Friday: January 26/24

Happy Friday everyone! It's been a long week, and I'm looking forward to eating up a great new fic! Check out these fics to start off your weekend, and I hope you'll come back on Sunday for a new list!!

Enjoy!

MARKED FOR LATER JOHNLOCK

The Edge of the Sea by weeesi (E, 16,659+ w., 7/12 Ch. || WiP || Pre/Post-TRF, POV John, Angst, Complicated Relationships, Pining John, Jealous John, Sherlock/Victor Trevor, Grief/Mourning, John's Trust Issues, Closeted John, Character Study, Panic Attacks) – Sherlock is dead. The next week passes in a blur. Mycroft invites John not to come to the funeral if he’d like, except for the fact that Mrs Hudson needs an escort and he’d really rather get through it than wonder forever what it would have been. He goes, and sits, and contains, and pours a cup of scalding-hot coffee down his throat which he hopes will burn down the tumble of nerves and anger and the type of sick-sadness he can’t examine too closely and the other feelings he won’t even acknowledge. He misses not missing him all the same. John spends the next two years alone. Sherlock doesn't.

The Man in the Iron Collar by Mamaorion (M, 128,771+ w., 29/? Ch. || WiP || 1800s Steampunk England Magical Realism AU || Circus, Faries, Flying, Soulmates, Murder Mystery, Prophesy, Healer John, Mind Reader Sherlock, Slow Burn, Alternating POV, Animal Transformation, Hurt/Comfort, Soulmates, Freeing Prisoner, Bullying, Kidlock) – The magical worlds of Faerie and humans have been separated by the Wall for over 1,000 years, but halfbloods, half-Faerie/half-human hybrids, continue to trickle into this magical, steampunky 19th century England. Healer Captain John Watson discovers a telepathic halfblood imprisoned in a traveling circus. While he tries to unravel his mysterious connection to this wild man, the two are pulled into London's halfblood underworld. A wave of serial murders will take them beyond the Wall and into the ancient battle between humans and Faerie.

MARKED FOR LATER GOOD OMENS

post-professional endeavours by darcylindbergh (T, 8,949 w., 3 Ch. || Comedy, Fluff, South Downs Shenanigans, POV Outsiders, Real Estate) – Red, you are the green tea latte to my hot cocoa. I can't believe we've been nearly three years in the soup together. I hope you enjoy this one!!

Mint Tea by CopperBeech (E, 23,006+ w., 8/? Ch. || WIP || Human AU || Cottager Aziraphale, Gardener Crowley, Light Dom/Sub, Dom Crowley, Sub Aziraphale, Top Crowley, Face-Fucking, Deep Throat, Consent, Blow Jobs, Dirty Talk, Gratuitous Sex, Intercrural Sex, Quickies, Rough Sex, Baked Goods, Phone Sex, Masturbation, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Edging, Aziraphale in Lingerie, Nipple Play, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Cuddles, Stargazing, Picnicking) – Workaday clerical drone Aziraphale Fell unexpectedly comes into a cottage in the South Downs. But life is as drab as ever, and worse, a disastrous decision has left him with mint running rampant through all the beautiful plantings. It's clearly time someone got him- er, his garden - under control.

RECENTLY BOOKMARKED LOKIUS

more than words by unintentionallyangsty (T, 4,716 w., 1 Ch. || LOKI SERIES || Lokius, Post S2, Slow Romance, Awkward Romance, First Dates, Awkward Flirting, Attachment Issues, Abandonment Issues, Touch-Starvation, Slow Dancing, Shyness, Insecure Loki, Anxiety Attacks, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, Romantic Fluff, Fluffy Angst, Hugs, Getting Together, Future Fic) – After everything - in spite of everything-, there are only a few words that have truly gone unspoken between Loki and Mobius. And, in spite of Loki's famed "silver tongue", none of these words ever seem to come easily. Luckily, Mobius is patient. They have all the time in the world, after all. 

[twistedtummies2]

Top 5 Portrayals of Charles Augustus Milverton

Our final list devoted to the supporting cast of Sherlock Holmes and his world was the single most challenging to create. I’ve talked about Professor Moriarty, Irene Adler, and Sebastian Moran in previous lists, and all of them are villains I think most would place in the “love to hate” category. These are characters who, either because they are simply entertaining, or because they have some deeper and more complex elements of interest, we actually enjoy seeing in action (to some degree or another), and perhaps even find ourselves rooting for to some degree. Of course, an antagonist of any sort doesn’t HAVE to be likable in order to be effective: they simply need to be good at what they do, which is providing opposition to the protagonist. Some bad guys are meant to be characters the readers - as well as the heroes of the story - find utterly and totally repugnant. A friend of mine refers to them as “punchable” villains, and I think that’s accurate: they’re characters you just hate with a passion and want nothing more than to see them decked out with a punch to the face, if not something better. One of the earliest examples of such “punchable” characters is our topic for today: the Master Blackmailer, Charles Augustus Milverton. Despite only appearing in one story (which, to be fair, is the treatment nearly all of Holmes’ enemies got), Milverton has made his mark as one of the detectives most infamous and despicable villains, mostly because of the fact that not only are the readers meant to hate him…but even Holmes HIMSELF expresses absolute DISGUST with Milverton. The character is written to be the most deplorable slimeball on the face of the Earth, his attitude and actions so vile that even the World’s Greatest Detective - who has faced so many criminals and crooks - despises him. Keep in mind, Holmes holds nothing but respect for Professor Moriarty, the Napoleon of Crime and his arch-enemy: for him to so utterly detest Milverton is a sign of just how awful a person this character is.

Milverton is an opportunistic cad of the highest order. He is described as a sort of human snake, with Doyle using reptilian analogies for the character’s motions, appearance, and so forth. In the books, Milverton does what he does primarily for greed: he blackmails people and profits off of their misfortunes, and this is really how he makes much of his living. Nearly everything he owns is due to him weaseling money, power, and so forth out of other human beings. To make matters worse, if someone DOESN’T pay up, he still profits in his own mind: once the dirty laundry he hangs over their heads gets aired out to the populace, everyone else in his grasp, present or future, will KNOW he’s being serious. It’s indicated that Milverton takes sadistic joy out of what he does, as he craves the feeling of being in power and control over others: in some versions, even in death, he shows neither remorse nor even fear, as he still believes, after he’s gone, he’ll have the upper hand. In others - including the original story that bears his name - once he realizes he’s cornered, he cowers and cringes and crawls like the craven worm he is. Either way, any time Milverton is beaten, it is satisfying beyond belief: that is ultimately the way he is meant to be. A smear on the fabric of humanity that everyone - the readers, the protagonists, and I suspect even the author - feels VERY happy to see washed away. To say there are “favorite” versions of Milverton of mine is overselling things. That indicates I actually LIKE the guy in ANY rendition, and I really don’t: no one is supposed to. But I felt, given his reputation and prominence, he deserved some limelight as much as the other characters I’ve covered. So, I looked at a few basics: which versions were the most satisfying to see beaten, which versions were played by actors I have a particular fondness for (despite such a horrible fiend being their role), and which ones did something interesting with the character that I can’t help but praise? Taking all those things together, allow to present - with an almighty asterisk beside the title - My Top 5 “Favorite” Portrayals of Charles Augustus Milverton.

5. Barry Jones, from the 60s BBC Series.

Jones is what might be termed - and you will pardon my blunt and crude analogy - your “basic b!tch” Milverton. He sticks to the source and sticks to it truly, without much reimagining involved. That’s not a bad thing, but I think other Milvertons higher up do a bit more interesting twists with the character. Jones is perfect casting, being a master at playing snobbish and reprehensibly dandified fellows; in another Sherlock Holmes outing, the film “A Study in Terror,” he played such a character in the form of the Duke of Shires: a slightly comical fop who starts off as an unlikeable so-and-so, but eventually shows he has a good heart beneath his pompous exterior. Milverton is essentially if you took that character and removed all likability from his soul.

4. Boris Ryzhukin, from The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes & Dr. Watson.

While I think Jones’ portrayal of the Master Blackmailer is closer to the novel, Ryzhukin’s performance is equally excellent, and the adaptation makes an interesting change to the character. In this version, Milverton’s story is the prelude to the events of “The Final Problem,” as he is revealed to be one of Professor Moriarty’s top agents. His case is therefore the catalyst that sets off the chain of events ending in the battle at Reichenbach Falls.

3. Robert Hardy, from the Granada Series.

While I have some issues with the creative liberties taken in this adaptation of the story - which is very rare for the Brett series, I must confess - I think Robert Hardy’s take on Milverton is absolutely perfect, being both accurate to the source and going just a little bit beyond that to make him as creepy and even intimidating as he is slimy and sickening. Not much else to say, just a masterclass of fine acting in the guise of a thoroughly awful dastard.

2. Lars Mikkelsen, from Sherlock.

In this version, the character is renamed “Charles Augustus Magnussen,” to better match Mikkelsen’s Danish roots. The change of name, however, does nothing to disguise this versions nastiness. While much of season three of “Sherlock” was “meh,” I think Magnussen’s episode is one of the best of the whole series, and while he is a totally dispensable customer, the incarnation was very interesting. In this version, Magnussen has the exact same “powers” as Sherlock Holmes, being just as much of a genius and a brilliant expert at deduction as the detective, if not superior to him. He uses these abilities to figure out people’s weaknesses more easily and exploit them.

1. The Version from Moriarty the Patriot.

This is the closest any version of Milverton has come to being a “love to hate” character for me. (The keyword being “closest.”) While we’ve seen a version of Milverton who worked for Moriarty, this version turns out to be an enemy to BOTH Sherlock Holmes AND his arch-nemesis, and ends up being the closest thing to a “big bad” the series has given us so far. He is described as the “pure evil” counterpoint to Moriarty’s “necessary evil” in this reimagining, and is fueled more by his sadistic desires than greed. He's voiced by Kenji Nojima in Japanese, and Kayleigh McKee in the English Dub.

[trikruismybitch]

Funny Prompts

* “Listen, (name) would underatand cause (pronoun) has realistic expectations of what I am. And what I am is sexy trash.”

* “It seemed like a good idea at the time. I have terrible judgment.”

* “That’s not me.” “That’s not you?” “Nope.”

* “Ugh, as if!”

* “I feel comfortable using legal jargon in everyday life.” (Something happens) “I object!”

* “What am I allergic too?” “Pine nuts....and the full spectrum of human emotions.”

* “I would have given everything to be exactly like everyone else.” *scoffs* “You wanted to be petty and dishonest?”

* “I’m surrounded be idiots.”

* “The only thing going down is your husband in another women.”

* “You will never rise from the ashes of your shame and humiliation!”

* “It’s not my fault you dated a bunch of losers till you met me.”

* “I’ll admit that sometimes I tune people out but mostly because they rarely have anything useful or interesting to say!”

* “It is possible to be right and foolish.” 

* “I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.”

* “Badges? We ain’t got no badges? We don’t need no badges! I don’t have to show you any stinking badges!”

* ”just when I thought I was out they pull me back in.”

* "People are weird. When we find someone with weirdness that is compatible with ours, we team up and call it love.”

* "You know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."

* “It’s just a flesh wound” “Your bleeding out!”

* “I am serious and don’t call me Sherley.”

* “Leave the gun. Take the cannoli.”

* “I learned a long time ago that worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere.”

* "If I wasn't terrified of heights, I'd like this. But, I'm terrified of heights, so I don't like this."

* "Liar! Try me again, and I promise you that you and I are gonna have a Middle Passage experience, a fight for survival, and I will win. Have I made myself clear? Clear?"

* "That's it, Dishonor! Dishonor on your whole family! Dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow!"

* “(Name), You Have The Right To Remain Silent. What You Lack Is The Capacity."

* “That’s like a big misconception. I’m not shy! I just don’t speak if I don’t have anything to say.”

* “I refuse to answer that on the grounds of I don’t want to.”

* “Sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.”

* “It’s not bragging if it’s true.”

* “She is more like “girl with dragon tattoo" than “the girl next door”

* “I'm (Name). I know everything.”

* “I will slap the taste out of your mouth.”

* “Give me a mountain, I’ll climb it. Give me a Katy Perry song, I’ll sing it.”

* “You think you can rattle me I am un-ratable.”

* “There is no such thing as bad ideas. Just poorly executed awesome ideas.”

* “(Name) smiles. Alert the media!”

* “You know, I look at you and I see myself. A less dashing, less intelligent version.”

* “Some girls just can’t resist my good looks, my style and my charm, and my unflinching ability to listen to Taylor Swift.”

* “Hopefully your hero hair hasn’t fallen out by then.”

* “I was ambushed. I was shot. Now, I’m vengeful.”

* “Kiss me or kill me. We both know you’re only capable of one.”

* “I’m a terrible liar… I’m even worse at duplicity.”

* “I’ve been dead before. I got over it.”

* “I’m lost… metaphorically, existentially.”

* “Impressive, you’re like Sherlock Holmes with brain damage.”

* “We have Nirvana, Nine Inch Nails, Boyz II Men…(Name).”

* “When 9 Russians tell you you’re drunk, you lie down.”

* “And you’ve hot your complaint quota for the day. Congratulations you are officially the worst.”

* “No one is going to respect you until you show them who you really are, so if you wear old lady choker scarves, you're going to get old lady goats.”

* “Have I mentioned that I've had a rotten couple of months?”

* “Oh come on, (name), for once in your immortal life can you not be so noble?”

* “Careful, Sabine, or Celeste, or whatever you like to call yourself. Sudden moves make me jumpy and homicidal.”

* “Remind me to annihilate your brother once you're healthy.” “Yes, remind me to remind you to get in line.”

* “I thought I told you to stay put” “well I hate being told what to do so I ignored you.”

* “The only thing delicate about you is your ego” “When placed beside the behemoth size of yours, certainly.”

* “You and I on the same team. It must be Christmas.”

* “(name) isn't dead yet? Well, good on them! I love a good survival story!”

* ”dull, dreary, hideous” “You talking about the clothes or something else?” “Why, are you feeling insecure?”

* “There, there, little lambs. Us girls have got to stick together.”

* “Option one, go about your business like a good little boy. Option two, violent disembowelment. What’s it going to be?”

* “I know I called you bro, but I lowkey wanna marry you.”

* “I love making people who already hate me, hate me more.”

* “I’m not rude, your just not used to being around honest people.”

* “once I start taking my own advice it’s over for you bitches.”

* “I have multiple personalities and none of them like you.”

* “I’m being nice to you. Have I stabbed you? No.”

* “Don’t confuse my personality and my attitude. My personality is who I am, but my attitude? That depends on you.”

* “If you want me to control my temper you better control your stupidity.”

* “It’s okay if you don’t like me, not everyone has good taste.

* “I’m so glad you stopped talking to me, it’s like the trash took itself out.”

* “If I was meant to be controlled I would’ve come with a remote.”

* “I know looks aren’t everything but I have them just in case.”

* “I rolled my eyes so hard, I just checked out my own ass.”

* “You think I’m crying about you? No I’m crying about all the time I wasted on you.”

* “You say you hate me, but you still watch me the most, it’s pathetic.”

* “You hate my attitude? *laughs* Then report me to whocares.com.”

* “If you tell me not to do something, I’ll do it twice and take pictures.”

* “Scars heal” “No they don’t wounds heal” “Oh yeah. What do scars do? They fade I guess?” “I don’t care what scars do.” “You should (name)”

* “You amuse me, I will make you mine.”

* (Name does/says something cute) “You know I once saw a really fat baby giving Eskimo kisses to a kitten and that was more adorable.”

* “I want to know how the fuck this happened, when the fuck, why the fuck and what the fucking fuck."

* “Do I regret it, yes. Would I do it again? Probably.”

* “If you were my wife I’d put poison in your coffee.” “If you were my husband I’d drink it.”

* “Being attractive doesn’t preclude being intelligent” “so your saying your not attractive smart“ “No, I happen to be both.”

* “I don’t apologize because I never make mistakes.”

* “Goodmorning” “goodmorning” “goodmorning, not you, you can choke” “wait happened?” “I ate their last cookies” “THEY WERE SPECIAL COOKIES!”

* “if you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.”

* “No I checked my receipt, I didn’t buy any of your bullshit.”

* “the difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.”

* “don’t like me? have seat with the rest of the bitches waiting for me to give a fuck."

* “If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.”

* “You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.”

* *insults R* “Why are you laughing?” “I always laugh when people try to hurt my feelings as if I have any.”

* “I hope Karma slaps you in the face before I do.”

* “Sweetheart, I’m as sweet as sugar, hard as ice. If you hurt me once, I’ll kill you twice.”

* “What’s the problem? I don’t have a problem, I have multiple problems. Plural. Wanna hear?