#wolfstar micro fic

[oh-my-wolfstar]

@wolfstarmicrofic

Dec. 1, prompt: party

word count: 369

tw: swearing

Remus Lupin was starting to hate parties. Not because he didn't enjoy them, which he did, but because if he saw one more giggling girl try to hit on his boyfriend he thought he might scream. They hadn't told anyone aside from their close friends about their relationship, as Sirius had been recently disowned and he was understandably wary of adding more scandal to his life. Even though Remus was fine with everyone knowing, he didn't mind; he understood his boyfriend's desire for privacy. No, he was more angry about the girls who were relentlessly hitting on Sirius despite the fact that he was clearly not interested. annoyed with watching from afar, Remus made his way over to Sirius. 

"No, I'm sorry." Sirius was saying, presumably in response to the blond ravenclaw girl he was talking to asking him out. (The sixth one that night, Remus was counting)

"Please?" She batted her eyelashes obscenely

"No, I'm not interested." Sirius snapped, the previously concealed frustration in his voice now evident.

"but why not? You're not seeing anyone," she whined. Sirius opened his mouth to respond but she apparently wasn't done, "I know you're single, but you don't have to be." Remus was about to step in when Sirius rolled his eyes and turned to face the party.

"for fucks sake, ALL RIGHT, LISTEN UP."  Sirius shouted. "please stop asking me out, I'm taken." Sirius laced his hand with Remus's and held them up. The room fell silent for a second, the James wolf whistled and Lily began to clap. Slowly, the rest of the party joined in and the party resumed. Later, when the party had ended, Remus pulled Sirius aside. 

"Are you ok?" he asked Sirius. Sirius blinked at him.

"Of course, why?"

"I just wanted to make sure that girl didn't make you feel like you had to come out. Or me, god if I did anything to make you feel-" Sirius cut him off

"It wasn't her, or you mooney, I swear. I told people because I wanted to. I have for a while, she just gave me a good reason to shout about my amazing boyfriend." Sirius grinned. Remus just smiled and then kissed his boyfriend.

[mrsfrecklesmarauders]

CW: Gender dysphoria and unexpected periods

***

Remus didn't feel well. It hadn't happened in months. And Remus thought that he had finally got rid of that horrible torture. But when he went to take a piss during the night, he was surprised to see his trousers stained with red.

Remus was too shocked to move and stayed in the loo for a while as tears dropped down his face silently. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair! Remus had been three months on T.

When he was able to move again, he sneaked out of the dorm in search for Poppy. She was the only was who he trusted with something like that. Even though it was still very embarrassing.

Poppy was very comprehensive providing Remus with tampons and pain killers.

Remus didn't know how he managed to return back to bed without waking up the boys. He shared dorm with the most cool three boys he had met. It was thanks to his old friendship with Sirius that gave him access their friend group. They were truly amazing. And Remus was just so embarrassed to even think about them finding out. Of course Sirius knew he was trans since he met his old self. But Remus didn't want anyone else in that school to know. He just wanted to pass as a cis boy and fit in.

The next morning, as the boys woke up and started to get ready for school, Remus stayed in bed hiding under the covers, ignoring James's insistant calls. It got to the point where James got irritated for being ignored. But Remus wasn't planning of getting out of bed anytime soon.

"Care to wake your sleepy stubborn friend, Pads?" James groaned as Sirius finally came out of the shower "We're missing breakfast"

Remus's eyes filled with tears. He felt guilty and sad but he couldn't move. This awful thing was painful.

"Don't worry, Prongsie" Remus heard Sirius’s voice with amusement "I'll take care of the sleepy head. You go ahead"

"I'm sorry but I'm starving!" James exclaimed with a sigh. Remus heard footsteps towards the door.

"Oi! Wait for me, Prongs!" Peter called out as he jogged after James "Hurry up, I won't save you breakfast again, pretty boy!" he added quickly as he closed the door behind him.

It had become a routine for Sirius and Remus to stay behind every morning. Sirius took ages in the shower, and took his time getting ready, and  Remus was a sleepy head who struggled to get on his feet. Plus, James and Peter didn't have the patience to wait for them. Sometimes they did and they all got late for breakfast. Most times they didn't and they saved Remus and Sirius something to eat.

Though today, Remus wished Sirius had gone with the other boys. He was too ashamed to face Sirius right now. Sirius, the boy Remus had a big crush on. Sirius, the boy he might be falling in love with. Again.

Sirius was so gorgeous and perfect. So manly and sexy. Remus was so pathetic. He hated his stupid feminine body. He hated that he was born a girl.

"Moony?"

Remus closed his eyes wishing that way Sirius would disappear.

"Come on, handsome. We are really late"

Remus's nostrils felt Sirius’s fresh shampoo giving him a strange desire to get closer and sniff harder. It was bloody delicious.

"Nut guin' " Remus mumbled under the covers.

"What was that?"

Remus took a deep breath "I said I am not going!" he snapped "Tell the teachers I feel sick or something"

"Are you really sick, Moony? Want me to get Pomfrey?" Remus heard the concern on Sirius’s voice. And Remus hated him for it.

"Just go, Sirius! Leave me alone"

Remus could feel Sirius’s presence leaning towards him.

"Can you at least tell me what's wrong with you?"

"Told you, I'm sick"

"But with what?" Sirius asked "Flue? Headache? Bellyache?"

It felt worse than those maladies. Remus knew girls went through it every month without a problem. But Remus was not a girl.

"Just fuck off, Sirius!!"

Remus felt guilty by the irritated way he sounded.

"Right" Sirius sighed, and Remus was relieved when he started backing away "I'll go, but can you please come out to do my tie? You know I suck at doing it myself"

Sirius didn't have the patience to fix his own tie. Whereas Remus had begged his father to teach him. Wearing a tie was a men's thing. And Remus wanted to be a man. When Remus got to Hogwarts, and discovered that Sirius was always with a messy tie, he volunteered to help him. Remus hadn't mind. Any excuse to be close to Sirius, breathe his cologne and feel his sweet toothpaste breath was enough. Although not today. Not when Remus probably smelled like shit.

"Do it yourself" Remus mumbled.

"Noo! We have Chemistry today and Slughorn is not going to leave me alone about my tie. You know that twat" Sirius said with a whine. "Moony, help!"

Remus was feeling more and more the neccesity of punching Sirius’s face.

"Moony?"

Remus didn't answer. But he was clenching his teeth.

"Fine!" Sirius sighed "I guess I won't go as well. I can't possibly go out of this room without my tie perfectly done..."

It happened in the matter of seconds. Remus jumped out of bed like a cat, groaning and cursing like a sailor, and grabbing Sirius’s tie as he pulled him closer.

"If I fucking do this would you fuck off and leave me alone?? Jesus Christ!! You're so annoying!!"

Sirius blinked at him in surprise. He looked concerned that Remus might strangle him with the tie.

"I'm sorry" Remus said, feeling guilt.

Sirius showed him a comforting smile. God! Could anyone be this beautiful with their hair wet and sleepy eyes? Remus was dizzy with such beauty. Or maybe he was just dizzy. He got out of bed very quickly.

"I really feel like shit today"

"I don't want to bother you, Moony" Sirius said as Remus fixed his tie "But I am worried. Should I get you something? Some medicine? Some food? Pomfrey?"

Remus couldn't face Sirius’s intense eyes on him so he fixed his gaze on Sirius’s tie.

"I'll be fine, Padfoot..." he was trying that nickname out and what a better way to do it than show Sirius he was fine, with a smile "I just need some..."

Remus stopped talking and even thinking when he saw it. Just on the shirt's collar. Pink and clear. A stain of lipstick. Actually several marks across the white fabric of Sirius’s shirt.

Remus knew Sirius was popular amongst girls. Apparently he had dated an older girl last term. And that gave him a reputation. Now, Sirius was seen with a different girl each week. Of course, he was bloody beautiful. Who wouldn't want him?

"Moony?"

But that lipstick mark made Remus sick. He thought about a girl sitting on Sirius’s lap, kissing his neck with her pink lips. Her breasts pressed against his chest. Sirius panting and moaning, pulling her closer to his crotch...

"You have lipstick on your shirt" Remus confirmed out loud. He wanted for Sirius to say it was misunderstanding. That it wasn't lipstick but paint or grape juice, something.

Though Sirius’s reaction was of amusement.

"Oh, God!" Sirius said as he took a look at his shirt "I didn't even notice it was there"

It was lipstick then. Meaning a girl had kissed his neck.

Sirius giggled "Imagine Slughorn's face noticing I have more action than him. Bet he and his wife have the most boring sex life ever"

Remus couldn't even bring himself to fake a smile.

"Good thing Vanessa only left a lipstick mark and not a hickey...." Sirius said with a frown "Wait, was it Vanessa?"

Remus had to face once and for all that he would never have a chance with Sirius. Remus was so common. Who would want a freak like him? A boy who wasn't even a real boy because boys didn't have bloody periods. Plus, it was crystal clear that Sirius was straight. He could have anyone.

But it hurt. It hurt everytime some other girl flirted with Sirius, kissed him or worse.... He didn't even want to imagine how they touched him and made him feel good.

Remus was now so dizzy that he also felt nausea. He couldn't take it anymore. The pain was so strong and the nausea was so awful that he ran to the bathroom to puke.

"Remus?"

He was so pathetic. God! What was wrong with him? It was truly embarrassing to be this lame and uncool in front of his crush.

Remus let out a few sobs as he emptied his stomach. He felt Sirius’s presence behind him. But he couldn't face him. He just stared as his own sick as tears filled his eyes.

"Hell no!" Sirius snapped angrily "I am not going anywhere, Moony. You're not okay. And I am staying with you. Whether you want it or not"

Remus felt how Sirius sat next to him on the floor. And stroked his back gently.

Remus couldn't take it no more. He bursted down crying. He covered his face in embarrassment.

Sirius pulled him into a hug. Remus couldn't believe how someone who smelled so good, fresh out of the shower, could hug someone who smelled like vomit and probably period blood. Remus was so disgusting. Though Sirius didn't seem to care. And that thought made Remus cry even more.

The next hour or so passed in a blur full of tears, messy hugs and stupid attempts to make Sirius go. But Sirius was stubborn. He stayed. He even texted James saying none of them would go to class and help them make an excuse for the teachers.

Sirius also convinced Remus to take a shower which probably was for the best since Remus was stinky. And Sirius gave him some privacy while he went to get them some food.

Remus bathed, changed into comfy clothes and by the time he got back to bed with a sad expression, Sirius was back with a tray of what seemed like a delicious breakfast.

"When Manolo knew you were sick, he thought you should be fed like a king" Sirius smirked as he put the tray in front of Remus "You should get sick more often" he added as he put a strawberry on his mouth "It suits me"

Unfortunately strawberries reminded Remus of the girl's lipstick. Vanessa, was it? He wondered what flavor her lipstick was. He bet it was strawberry flavored.

"I'm not hungry" Remus replied. "And you should really go to class"

"Go to boring class when I can have breakfast like a king and have your sweet, and not grumpy at all, company?" Sirius asked as he took a seat next to Remus, took a sip of the glass of juice and smiled "Guess what my decision would be"

Remus swallowed "I'm not grumpy"

"You're pouting, Moony" Sirius said "It's so adorable"

Remus stopped making the pout he didn't even know he was making.

"I even got you a piece of chocolate cake" Sirius pointed to the tray.

Eggs and bacon with toasts. Strawberries, orange juice, a cup of black tea and a piece of chocolate cake.

It all suddenly looked tasty if Remus thought about the effort Sirius had made for him. He probably told Manolo exactly what Remus liked for breakfast and that he usually ate a lot. It was sweet to think about how much Sirius cared.

Remus smiled slightly as he took a bite of the chocolate cake and oh damn... He hadn't had food as delicious as the one Manolo prepared.. And he really craved something sweet at the moment. Chocolate was always a good idea.

"I can see you're enjoying it"

Sirius watched in amusement as Remus finished his cake in two bites.

Remus swallowed and twisted his mouth in a smile.

"You should eat as well" Remus pushed the tray towards Sirius’s side.

Sirius gave him a sweet smile and grabbed the fork "I was planning to" he said as he stuffed some eggs in his mouth.

Remus watched him chew, swallow and lick his lips afterwards. It wasn't fair that Sirius was so gorgeous it was annoying. He couldn't look this perfect while doing something so mundane like eating.

"What?" Sirius raised an eyebrow.

He took a large bite of a piece of toast as well.

"I will need the energy if I am babysitting your grumpy ass all day" Sirius said with his mouth full.

Remus took the toast from Sirius’s hand and took a bite as well.

"I thought you said you weren't hungry!" Sirius protested.

"Wanker" Remus mumbled with his mouth full making Sirius laugh.

Remus knew if he had been left alone, he would have stayed in bed, cried until he fell asleep and repeat. But Sirius’s presence made him distract himself from the pain and actually have a good time.

After eating they talked about random stuff while sharing a cigarette. They used Remus's ipod to play songs to each other. It was a game to prove who had better taste. Remus always won.

Later on, Remus forced Sirius to read a book while he finished the one he was reading currently. But damn, Sirius got easily bored. He was trying to tickle Remus or bother him for attention.

"Read your own book, Sirius, and fuck off!" he rolled his eyes.

"But it's boring!!!"

Sirius put his chin on Remus's shoulder, giving him a shot of sparks on his tummy. He smelled so good that it gave Remus lots of desires.

"Fifty shades of Grey?" Sirius said as he read the cover of the book he was reading "Moony what is this? Soft porn?" he added as he read its contents raising an eyebrow "How come your book is better than mine"

Remus blushed. "Lily said it was good!" he spat as he took the book back. "And Mobby Dick is also good"

"Mmm... I didn't know Evans was so kinky. Don't you think Prongs needs to know?"

Remus couldn't avoid but laughing.

"It's all about the romance"

"You find lashing someone romantic?" Sirius asked trying to reach the book again. But this time Remus was too quick "Let me read that again!"

"No!" Remus laughed as he put it over his head and Sirius tried to reach it "Watch it is not my copy"

"Evans's, ha?" Sirius grinned "I want to know what Mr. Grey does later on, are you into that?"

Sirius began tickling Remus, making him giggle like a kid. "Stop! Sirius, Stoop!! Ahaha...."

It was all fun and games until Sirius ended up on top of Remus in bed.

Suddenly, Remus was aware of Sirius’s warmth covering Remus. His hard chest. The muscles of his arms. His thick legs. God, his crotch was touching Remus's belly. Just by acknowledging that, Remus's body temperature rose quickly. It was fast how Remus's body ached in desire. It got worse for the hormones that the period brought.

His face burned as well as the rest of his body. Especially when Sirius stared at him like that. His gray eyes flickered through Remus's face as if he was some sort of piece of art. Remus noticed how Sirius's cheeks were adoringly pink. And he liked to think he provoked that.

But maybe he wasn't the only one.

"Vanessa, ha?" Remus spat, pushing Sirius away from his body.

Sirius blinked "Ha?"

Remus stared at the book on his lap "Maybe you should read this and practice all of it with Vanessa"

Damn, he sounded more jealous than he intended.

Sirius raised an eyebrow "Vanessa is so over. You know I don't repeat girls, Moony"

"Oh sorry, my bad" Remus rolled his eyes.

Sirius smirked "Are you jealous?"

Remus snorted in response. But that said it all for Sirius.

"Bloody hell, you are jealous!"

Remus blushed immediately, internally cursing himself for being so obvious. Friends weren't supposed to act all possessive about other friends. But God, this was the boy of Remus's dreams. He was the boy that had owned his heart since he was ten. The boy whose name Remus had written inside hearts, the boy who he pictured while listening to love songs. And definitely the boy he wanted to live a romantic fantasies with. Like Fifty shades of Grey, for example. But that was his horny ass talking.

"Don't worry, Moony" Sirius smiled as he stroked his curls "No girl is going to take me away from you... They come and go, Moons. But our friendship is forever"

Remus smiled at those words. Best friends forever. They had sworn it with Moon wishes and saliva promises.

"Plus, do you think I would be in a random girl's bed if she were sick?"

Remus chuckled "Oh I bet you would"

Sirius laughed "Okay, maybe... But for selfish reasons. Not because I care about her...." and he stared into Remus's eyes as he said the next thing "Not like I care for you. You are my favorite person, Remus"

Remus cursed his swing moods and the fact that his eyes were filled with tears again. To hide his face, he hugged Sirius’s waist like a child. He pressed his forehead on Sirius’s chest, smelling him in.

Sirius was surprised at first. But then Remus felt his body relax and started caressing his hair.

Sirius’s beauty wasn't the only thing that Remus liked about him. He was a golden friend. He cared about Remus like no one else. He made Remus feel special and safe.

They had been close back when they were kids. But now, just in a short time, they had gotten even closer. Everything was easy when they were together. They laughed until their tummies hurt. They understood each other with just one look. They gave each other peace. They were comfortable around each other even if they gave each other physical affection.

The best part was that Sirius had accepted Remus as well as Rosie. Remus could just be himself around him. What a better way to love than that one?

It didn't matter if Sirius randomly snogged girls or let them kiss his neck leaving lipstick marks on his clothes. Remus had the satisfaction that they weren't important for his horny teenager best friend. Remus was.

Remus was just glad to have his best friend back. Life had been torture without him.

"Sirius?"

"Mmm?"

"Thank you" Remus said trying to swallow his tears. He couldn't cry again.

"For what?"

"For staying, for being, for bloody existing" Remus let out a soft chuckle and then sniffed. Remus couldn't see it but he knew Sirius was smiling beautifully "I would do anything for you, Moony"

Remus believed him.

[tealeavesandtrash]

Wolfstar Micro Fic - @wolfstarmicrofic prompt: Dogwalker - 421 words

[unknown number] Hi. Sorry to bother you, Pete gave me your number. I’m looking for a dog walker, he said you might know someone?  Thanks, Remus

hi remus i’ll ask around, what are the dates? sirius

This Thursday? Hopefully for 2 weeks but I’m having an op so might change I know it’s short notice but everything fell through and I'm running out ideas

sorry, just talking to pete  i’ll do it

You will? 

yeah  i work round the corner, i can take him out at lunch

Thank you so much you're a lifesaver

no probs

————

Thanks for today I think Padfoot likes you

good bc I like him too also no offence, when pete said knee replacement i was expecting a grandpa

None taken  And no offence, when Pete said dog groomer, I wasn’t expecting so much leather and tattoos

no offence taken ;)

————

[attached photo] stick maybe coming home with us

————

[attached photo] You've knackered him out

————

I have phsyio this morning Key is in flowerpot if I'm not back 

no worries

————

how was it?

An hour of them teaching me how to bend my knee Like I haven’t been doing that my whole life??

well… you werent doing a great job of it if they had to replace it

Hilarious.

————

[attached photo] He’s waiting for you He knows your late

sorry padfoot :(( tell him ill be 5 mins x

————

okay so slight incident

What happened??

[attached photo] big fan of muddy puddles

Oh jesus

ill take him back to work and clean him up

You really don't have to  I can bath him

no offence ive seen you hobbling about you cant  wrangle him into a bath and kneel down to wash him 

I can handle it You’ve done enough already

its fine i had a cancellation won’t be a full pamper but youll have a squeaky clean pup back at 2

————

I dont think Padfoot's ever smelt so good

thats the blueberry pawfume 

The what

pawfume dog perfume blueberry scented

didn't know that was a thing 

next opening  i have hes getting the spa treatment

————

PT's cleared me for low-impact exercise  Aka get off my arse and start walking more

Oh congrats! I mean I’ll miss padfoot But glad ur healing good :)

Well You can still come with? Padfoot really likes you And I like talking to you

I like talking to you too

Or I coud take you out to dinner? As a thank you for everything I couldn't have coped without you

It’s a date x

[kingstarkingslay]

The soft glow of the morning sun filtered through the curtains, casting a warm light over the room. Sirius lay sprawled across the bed, his arm draped lazily over Remus, who was nestled against his side, feeling warm and content.

“Hey, Padfoot,” Remus murmured sleepily, his voice muffled against Sirius's shoulder.

“Yeah?” Sirius replied, half-asleep but already grinning at the sound of Remus’s voice.

“What would you do if you woke up one day and found out you were actually a giant marshmallow?”

Sirius snorted, waking up just a bit more. “Well, first, I’d have to figure out how to get out of bed without squishing myself. That would be tricky.”

Remus giggled, picturing it. “And then what?”

“Then I’d just roll around town, spreading sweetness everywhere,” Sirius said dramatically. “I’d be the life of every party. Everyone would want to hug me!”

“And what if someone tried to roast you?” Remus teased, raising an eyebrow.

Sirius gasped in mock horror. “Then I’d turn into a gooey blob and escape through the nearest window! Marshmallow agility, you know.”

Remus laughed, the sound like music to Sirius’s ears. “Alright, Mr. Marshmallow, next question: What would you do if you woke up one morning and found out you were a unicorn?” Remus asked, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

Sirius pretended to think hard, his brow furrowing dramatically. “Well, first, I’d probably check to see if my mane is fabulous,” he said, running a hand through his own tousled hair. “Then I’d spend the day prancing around the forest, spreading glitter everywhere!”

Remus chuckled, shaking his head. “And what if someone tried to ride you?”

“Easy! I’d just buck them off and yell, ‘Only for Remus!’” Sirius declared, punctuating his words with a playful kick.

Remus laughed, snuggling deeper into Sirius’s side. “Alright, next question: If you could only eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it be?”

“Chocolate frogs, obviously!” Sirius answered without missing a beat. “They’re delicious, and they keep hopping, so I’d never run out of fun!”

“True, but what if you had to catch them every time?” Remus teased, raising an eyebrow.

“Then I’d become the greatest chocolate frog catcher in history!” Sirius exclaimed, puffing out his chest. “I’d have trophies and everything!”

Remus couldn’t contain his laughter. “I can see the headlines now: ‘Sirius Black, Champion of Chocolate Frogs!’”

“Exactly!” Sirius grinned, clearly enjoying the banter. “What about you? What would you choose?”

“Hmm… probably pumpkin pasties,” Remus said thoughtfully. “They’re delicious and comforting, just like you.”

Sirius’s heart swelled at the compliment. “Flattery will get you everywhere, you know.”

“Good to know,” Remus said, feigning innocence. “Next question: If you could turn into any animal, what would it be?”

“Definitely a dragon,” Sirius replied, his eyes lighting up. “I’d be massive, breathing fire and soaring through the sky. Everyone would be in awe!”

“What if you accidentally roasted someone?” Remus asked, suppressing a smile.

“Then I’d turn back into a human and say, ‘Oops, my bad!’” Sirius laughed, imitating a casual shrug. “I’d make sure to look really innocent, too.”

Remus shook his head, chuckling. “You’re terrible!”

“Only in the best way,” Sirius said, leaning down to plant a playful kiss on Remus’s forehead. “Your turn again!”

“Alright,” Remus said, eyes sparkling. “If you could only speak in song lyrics for a day, what song would you choose?”

“‘I Want to Break Free’ by Queen,” Sirius answered immediately. “I’d just wander around singing about how much I love freedom… and how I can’t resist a good adventure!”

“And what if I asked you something serious?” Remus inquired, biting back a grin.

“I’d just sing it! ‘I want to break free, I want to break free!’” Sirius replied, bursting into laughter.

Remus joined in, their laughter filling the room with warmth. After a moment, Remus paused, his expression softening. “You know, I really love these mornings with you.”

“Me too,” Sirius said, wrapping his arms tighter around Remus. “You make everything better.”

“Even if I ask silly questions?” Remus teased.

“Especially because of that,” Sirius corrected, his voice serious yet playful. “You make being silly feel special.”

Remus smiled, warmth flooding his chest. “Alright, last question for now: If you could have any superpower, what would it be?”

Sirius grinned, looking thoughtful. “The power to make every day a cuddly day with you.”

Remus felt a rush of affection, and he nestled even closer. “I’d say you already have that superpower.”

——————��————————————————————

Just something I had lying in my notes app for weeks . Thought I’d brush the dust off and post it , waddya think ?

[kalegreeneyes]

February 10th - Bleed - 1732 words - @wolfstarmicrofic

cw: alcohol, homophobia, violence, blood

“Say it again, motherfucker,” Remus spits, hands flexing in the air. He makes a fist, releases it, lets it form again, over and over and over.

Unimpressed, the drunken asshole who started this whole thing just scoffs, swaying on his feet. “What the fuck are you gonna do about it if I do? Nothin’,” the guy spits at Remus’s feet. 

He’s big; bigger than Remus, by far. His arms strain against the confines of his shirt, almost threatening to tear the stitches. He is ugly, face contorted and swollen from what has surely been a rough life full of fighting and alcohol in a constant cycle. Remus doesn’t know this man. He’s never said two words to him before tonight, despite having seen him in this particular bar on more than one occasion. Now, as he flexes his fists and tries to figure out the best trajectory for his first punch, Remus wants to make him unrecognizable.

The guy is sizing Remus up too. He takes in his height, then his frame, and he decides–foolishly–that Remus is no threat to him. “I said,” he slurs, smirking smugly and pointing off to the side, “he’s a fucking fa-”

Before Remus can react, the person the drunk was pointing at has shot forward and stolen the first punch. Stolen is a strong word, seeing as it was him the guy was talking about, but still. Remus was so ready to throw the first punch. Five minutes ago, Remus had been sitting at the bar waiting for his drink. The scene played out in the background, with Remus watching from his periphery. 

It went as follows: Ugly Man throws back his 11th shot of the night. He wants to play darts, the bartender, Remus’s friend Lily, says no, Ugly Man goes into a strop and gets up to try to take someone else’s darts. Ugly Man is chastised by the bouncer, Remus’s friend Gideon, which causes him to stumble. Ugly Man knocks a drink out of the hands of the most breathtaking person Remus has ever seen. It literally takes his breath away, causing him to sit up straighter to catch it while he watches. The spilled drink soaks Ugly Man’s shirt, which makes him angry immediately at The Breath-Thief. The Breath-Thief apologizes even though it is not his fault, pressing a handful of bar napkins up against Ugly Man’s shirt. Ugly Man slaps the napkins out of The Breath-Thief’s hands, looks The Breath-Thief up and down, and sneers, mumbling something that Remus cannot hear but is clearly uncalled for. The Breath-Thief’s face grows wary, angry, slightly afraid? Remus stands. Ugly Man sways on his feet, points his finger in The Breath-Thief’s face, and yells at him to keep his hands away from him. Then he calls him a string of slurs that Remus is all too familiar with, and Remus is across the room before he knows it. Remus grabs Ugly Man’s shoulder, wrenches him around to face him instead of The Breath-Thief, tells him to say it again, and that brings us to the present moment, where The Breath-Thief has just sucker punched Ugly Man in the jaw.

Unfortunately, it seems as if The Breath-Thief has never thrown a punch in his life. He is shaking his hand out and looking down at his knuckles when Ugly Man recovers from the blow and retaliates, landing a punch of his own right on The Breath-Thief’s cheekbone. Ugly Man is wearing a wedding ring (poor woman, whoever she is) which splits the delicate, unblemished skin there. Remus curses himself quietly–he shouldn’t have taken his eyes off of Ugly Man. He knows better than to take his eyes off of his opponent, and it’s clear that The Breath-Thief does not. Remus was too distracted by The Breath-Thief being distracted to notice that while Ugly Man’s lip has puffed up, he did not go down by any means. 

The Breath-Thief does not go down either, but he does take a few steps back. He seems to have friends here with him that do not know how to fight either, though they seem less willing than he was to give it a shot. Remus grins, knowing that the fight is his now. He whistles to get Ugly Man’s attention, and when he swings his head around, Remus’s fist is crashing through in the other direction to meet it. The punch lands with a dull smack, knuckles meeting skin as he hits Ugly Man exactly where he had hit The Breath-Thief. In a perfect scenario, this would be the end of it and Remus would walk away unscathed. This is not a perfect scenario, because apparently Ugly Man has some fight left in him. He hits back, which Remus blocks, but then he uses his size to his advantage and tackles Remus to the ground. Remus has been here before, though, and it doesn’t break his focus in the slightest. He simply takes the punch, absorbs the fall, and uses the momentum to get the upper hand.

Remus knees Ugly Man in the side, Ugly Man punches Remus in the mouth. Remus doesn’t care. He punches Ugly Man in the stomach, which gives him just enough room to flip them. He gets hit a few more times in the process, but it’s not a problem. Remus knows that when they’re flipped it’s a done deal. He’s won the fight. He has the upper hand and he doesn’t stop punching until Ugly Man literally, genuinely taps out. No one even tried to stop them; not the bartender, not the bouncer, not Ugly Man’s friends, no one. It seems that no one wanted to stop him getting what was coming to him. It helps that Remus is close personal friends with both the bouncer and the bartender, but still. 

Ugly Man has only been made uglier by the beating Remus gave him, all red and glistening and bruised. Remus hates him, he thinks, as he watches Ugly Man’s friends haul him up and to the bathroom with Lily’s blessing to get him cleaned up before they get the fuck out. Gideon pulls Remus over to a booth and presses an ice filled rag he must have gotten from Lily over what definitely feels like a cut on his eyebrow. He may have won, but Ugly Man didn’t give up easily. It’s only now that the adrenaline rush is subsiding that he starts to feel the pain setting in and the sensation of wetness on his face. That can’t be good.

“Is it bad, Gid?” he asks with a grimace.

“Pfft, no, this is nothing!” Gideon murmurs good-naturedly, “You should see the other guy.”

Remus gives him his best attempt at a smile, which Gideon quickly tells him might not be a good idea. Gideon is about to tell him something else, but he’s interrupted by the arrival of The Breath-Thief himself.

“Could I take over?” he asks, inclining his head towards the makeshift ice pack Gideon is still holding to Remus’s face. Remus almost wishes that Gideon would say no, knowing that he definitely doesn’t look his best anymore. Despite the slightly swollen cut on his cheek, The Breath-Thief is still stunning. Perfect. Remus doubts very much that The Breath-Thief will think anything like that about him.

Gideon just hands the rag off and gives Remus a half salute, and then Remus is alone with The Breath-Thief, who is standing very close to him now.

“What’s your name?” asks The Breath-Thief as he presses the ice gingerly back onto Remus’s eyebrow.

“Remus,” he breathes out, trying not to wince as he does. His lip is definitely split. This conversation is more important. “What’s yours?”

“Sirius,” The Breath-Thief responds with a smile. Sirius.

“Like the star?” Remus asks, thinking that if he’s correct, it’s as fitting a name for him as a name could be. The brightest star in the sky. Breathtaking.

Sirius lights up, laughing, “Yep, like the star. I’m surprised you know that; most people think I mean ‘serious’, which would be a horrible name.”

“Sirius is a really good name,” Remus says, unable to get his brain to think of anything clever at all with Sirius moving to sit next to him in the booth.

“Only good thing my parents ever gave me,” Sirius nods as he gets comfortable. Remus doesn’t know what to say to that, so he just stays quiet and lets his eyes roam over Sirius’s features. He looks like he’s been sculpted out of fine marble.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Sirius says.

Remus blinks, then shrugs. “I know. I wanted to.”

“I’ve heard it all before, what he said about me.”

“Me too. S’why I wanted to,” Remus tells him, then wipes his lip on the back of his hand. The red stands out against his skin, but it doesn’t bother him. It never has.

“You know, it really seemed like you knew what you were doing back there. Makes me wonder why you didn’t knock him out,” Sirius muses, tucking a few strands of inky black hair behind his ear.

“I couldn’t just knock him out,” Remus tries, but it’s no good.

“You could’ve, though, right? He was off balance, and he certainly didn’t have half the skill you do. You had technique, he had brute force. You didn’t have to beat the shit out of him like that. Don’t you know how to knock someone out?” Sirius asks, moving the ice to a different part of Remus’s face. He’s gotten closer as they talk, only a few inches away now.

Remus can’t help but smile then, having been called out. He didn’t expect to be seen like that. “I know a lot of ways to knock someone out.”

“Then why didn’t you?” Sirius asks, the ice-filled rag coming to rest with his hand by Remus’s thigh. Remus doesn’t mind that he stopped; there’s new adrenaline rushing in his veins now to take the sting away.

Remus’s lip twitches up as he reaches out to cup his hand over Sirius’s jaw. He runs his thumb softly over the soft skin of his cheek, right under the cut that Ugly Man left there. There is a trail of still-wet crimson there, only just now starting to become sticky, and Remus pulls his hand away to look; to show Sirius. 

“He made you bleed.”

[thisliminalspacedaydreams]

Roadtrip (Part 1/?)

“I’m not going in the back.”

“You’re going in the back.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No—”

“Reggie is up front with me, I need a good guide.”

Regulus smirks at Sirius, tongue out and teasing as he opens the front door. “There you go, Sirius. I’m a good guide,” he says, closing the passenger side door with a snide smile.

Asshole.

Sirius throws hands, opening the back door and climbing in with Remus, who’s already settled in, kindle open. He doesn’t look up as Sirius slides in. “You know you were never getting in front, sweetheart, right?”

Sirius kisses his teeth. “It’s like Reggie’s trying to steal my best friend from me.”

Remus hums, “It’s possible to have several best friends.”

“No. James is one of a kind.”

Remus turns back to his kindle, “Then date him instead,” he shrugs.

“No!”

Remus’ eyes are back on Sirius, twinkling. “No?”

Turning to his right to grab the top of the security belt, Sirius mutters as he slides it on. “I don’t want to date him, I’m just saying he and Reggie have been chummy with—”

“Aannndd we’re ready to go,” James says as he slides into the driver’s side, smiling with all his teeth. “Take us away, space man,” he says, passing the map to Regulus, who opens it up.

“Tell me again why we aren’t using Google maps?” Sirius asks, and Regulus reaches back to slap the map over Sirius’ head.

“Hey!”

“Because Google maps is turning our brains into mush, and we’ll miss all the fun,” Regulus says.

Sirius rubs at his head. “All the fun of…knowing where to go?”

Regulus kisses his teeth. “I have a map, I know where to go.”

“But you could be using Google maps,” Sirius reasons.

“Yes, I could,” Regulus starts, with the tone of someone who is about to launch— “And I could also have chosen a different breakfast, a different degree, I could have decided to wake up and pick another type of shirt, there are so many options around me, all the time, and I am picking a map on purpose.”

“But—”

“It’s the adventure,” James interrupts again, pulling out of the main house.

The Black summer house is less of a house and more of a mansion, where most of them have been spending a lot of time this summer. To cap it off, the general consensus was that a road trip—wouldn’t it be fun?—would be a great way to end it. In two weeks, Remus and Sirius need to be back in England, where Remus will start teaching. James will head back to England a few days after. He’s got friends to see in Paris, so he’ll make the final leg of the drive up with Regulus before abandoning him to the clutches of City of Love while he goes back to London.

In the meantime?

Two weeks of road tripping the french countryside, from Cassis, where the Black family owns a house, all the way to Bordeaux, where the boys will take a train to Paris, leaving James and Regulus to climb up alone.

The problem Sirius has, is that Regulus and James have become friends.

The problem Sirius has, is that he is no longer the center of attention, the main tool through which everyone communicates. Over the course of the past two weeks, he has seen the blossoming friendship between his brother and his best friend, and he’s not—happy about that.

James has been remote working, and so has Regulus (who technically, is remote working from anywhere), while he and Remus have been on proper holidays. And okay, their schedules have been different. Okay, maybe James and Regulus have been left alone while Sirius took Remus out and about town, kayaking and paddle boarding to nearby islands, and maybe it would make sense for them to bond. And okay, it would have been sad for them not to get on, but they’re just… getting along too well. It’s freaking Sirius out.

“The adventure,” Regulus confirms, opening the map to its maximum before folding it back the way he prefers. “Right, Jamie, you’re going to take a left and follow the signs all the way to A50.”

Sirius is right there, once again, “Why Marseille, Reggie?”

“Because you’re going to have the best ice cream of your life there, that’s why.”

“But I hate Marseille.”

“And so you shall suffer.”

Sirius rears back, turning to look at Remus, who’s sporting a little, barely-there smirk, “He’s already bullying me!”

Remus doesn’t look up, reaching one hand to tangle it in Sirius’. “He’s not bullying you. You agreed to this road trip, you knew Reggie was going to pick the stops.”

“But Marseille?”

Regulus turns around from the passenger seat. “If I give you music rights, will you leave it?”

And that, is that.

Sirius grabs the aux cord and starts fiddling with Spotify. “Oh, there’s so much, I have so many ideas, let’s start with Chappell Roan.”

Regulus is quick to reach for the aux, “No, not Pink—”

“Pink Pony Club,” Sirius nods. “Yep. That’s the one.”

Regulus turns his head to James, please help, but James just shrugs. “I’m happy with all music.”

“No,” Regulus moans, just as Sirius fist pumps the air. “James, turn the car around.”

James doesn’t look up from the windshield. “Nope, we’re in this together now. No one is ruining this for me.”

“For you?” Regulus asks. “How has my road trip become yours?”

James sneaks a look at Regulus, “Since you sat next to me, polluting my work environment and telling me everything you wanted to do and whether everyone else would be on board.”

“That’s not how I remember it.”

James scoffs, “Sure it isn’t, Baby Black.”

“This is actually the worst thing to come out of this adventure,” Regulus says.

And Sirius is there, right away, putting his head in between the seats, pulling on his seatbelt. “Baby Black?”

“I like it,” James says right as Regulus quips, “It’s horrible.”

Sirius squints between the leather seats. “I can’t decide.”

“Sirius, the beauty of it,” James starts, taking a right, “is that there is nothing you have to decide on. It’s been decided on already. I like it, so I will use it.”

Regulus looks out the window, “I’m pretty sure that’s not how democracy works,” he pouts.

“Funny of you to think it’s a democracy. I am driving—”

“It’s my car—”

“I’m in charge of the music,” Sirius cuts in right before Remus grabs his arm and pulls him back to his seat behind Regulus, enough of that.

“Remus, they’re—”

“They are chatting. Leave them alone.”

“They’re flirting.”

“They’re not.”

Sirius turns to James. “James, are you flirting with my brother?”

“Um, not really?”

Remus turns to Sirius, “See?”, just as Regulus turns to James.

“’Um’? What a vote of confidence.”

“Well, do you want me to flirt with you?”

“No,” Sirius says, just as Regulus says nothing.

Regulus says nothing.

Regulus says.

Nothing.

“Reggie.”

Silence.

“Reggie.”

“Sirius, don’t say anything,” Remus says.

“I—”

“Just. Leave it.”

Sirius does.

For a minute.

“Okay, but—”

[deadchaoticcosmos]

Walburga Black micro-fic I guess in a way

Why can't I make you love me?! Walburga screamed

All sirius did was stare at her and then leave the room limping,After all she had just punished him.

Walburga realised then that she became what she always promised herself she wouldn't as a young child,

She became just like her father .

She calapsed onto the floor of the study.Her breathing uneven.

She could hear her children whispering .

She could hear regulus comforting sirius and cleaning up his wounds.She could her the rattling breath of her son as he tried to hold back his sobs.He always tried to be strong for regulus .

Kretcher was there to giving them bandages to place of the nastiest of wounds.

What has she become?

She could feel the black family mania finally setting in fully.

What has been happening for years,Finally took over her.She knew it was happening, she knew there was no retreat, that this was it.But she couldn't bring herself to care.If she was going to be like her father, she was going to be much, much worse.She will be your worst nightmare .

Inspired by that line from the anne Frank BBC show in 2009

My first micro fic, that wasn't in my head and I actually wrote down

I could probably make this in to a really short fic like one or two chapters to go more in depth but I probably won't

I will leave writing actual fics to better write

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

hey!! curious as to whether i should post my microfics on tumblr! a few people have said that i should - but the main reason i don't post there is because i write quite informally and also quite short fics and ik its unlikely that i'd ever sit a write something multi chaptered or over 2k!

[klilyr]

(Ok this is my first ever microfic so please be kind! I'm not a writer! I just couldn't stop thinking about this scene so I got up today and wrote it down. I'm a sucker for the black brothers.) Also it doesn't have a title.

Sirius dropped off a cup of tea in front of Remus who was reading his book by the fireplace before taking the other two steaming cups outside to the patio where his brother was sitting on the day bed, knees up to his chest, arms clutched around them and watching the rain drip off the trees onto the sodden lawn.

Regulus lifted his head up as Sirius approached him and took the tea from him gratefully.

"Thank you"

Sirius smiled softly. Regulus was here. He was here at the Potters and he was safe. Finally.

He sat down beside him as Regulus lifted the tea to his lips.

"Jesus fucking Merlin, Sirius! Did you drop the entire sugar bowl in here?"

Sirius whipped his head round to him as a distinctive "urgggh gross" was heard from inside the house.

"Oh whoops, must have mixed up yours and moony's mugs. Hang on!"

He waved his wand to switch the two cups and called out,

"Sorry love! Try it again!"

Remus grumbled something neither of the other two could hear in response and they both settled back into silence. Suddenly Regulus laughed, "he's going to lose a foot one day with the amount of sugar he consumes."

"Eh, maybe.. but I'm not going to be the one to get between him and his sugar and you shouldn't either, if you want to keep all your limbs."

"I could take Remus"

Sirius chuckled but decided to leave it.

"Uh Reggie.. I've been meaning to ask.. have you ever thought of.. uh.."

Regulus cut him off but there wasn't any malice in his voice, just resignation "Going to a mind healer?"

Sirius was taken aback by Regulus' non chalance on the subject.

"Well, yeah. I'm surprised you aren't getting angry at me right now for suggesting it to be honest. It's just, I went after I got out of that house and although I hated it, I have to say it did actually help."

"Yeah I know. Jamie told me."

Sirius scoffs and decides to let the fact his best friend was sharing his secrets with his little brother go. He wouldn't make a fuss. Not if it actually helped Regulus.

Regulus' voice was small but clear as he looked up to Sirius, chin resting on his knees that were still drawn up to his chest.

"I'll go. If you want me to."

"I think it will be really good for you."

"Ok."

"Ok."

Sirius leans back on the couch and both boys turn their heads back to watch the rain. Sirius breaths out, letting the warmth in his chest spread out through the rest of his body.

That was enough for now. Reggie was here and trying. That was enough.

[up-to-some-good]

Written for @wolfstarmicrofic

Prompt: Dark

If you asked Remus Lupin, he would tell you that he wasn't afraid of the dark, it simply made him uncomfortable. And really, who was comfortable with the dark? There could be anything lurking there, in the shadows, waiting to hurt a 5 year old boy who had just bade his parents goodnight, unaware of the monster waiting in the darkness of his bedroom. But he wasn't afraid. He slept with a nightlight since that fateful night and made sure never to wander alone in the dark, but that was common sense. At least, that is what he would say.

His answer hasn't changed by the time he was 21, living in an apartment in London with Sirius. He still used a nightlight, even with his boyfriend's warm weight against his back, and still left the bathroom light on overnight - just in case.

Which is why he was deeply unsettled when he arrived home from babysitting Harry to find the apartment block in complete darkness. He found out quickly from their elderly neighbour that there was some sort of fault with the electricity, which would only be fixed the following morning.

Remus sighed as he entered his darkened living room, lighting his wand the second he closed the door. Usually, Sirius would be home by now, expecting Remus with all the lights on, but tonight he was working late on an emergency at the hospital, so Remus would be alone for at least another hour in the dark.

Heart racing, Remus made his way to the kitchen, where he was sure they had some candles stashed for emergency situations. He put his wand down to dig in the drawers, pulling out an assortment of candles and a single box of matches. Relieved, he began lighting the candles, only for his hands to start shaking, spilling the matches all over the floor and knocking his wand onto the floor, extinguishing the only light he had.

Shaking, Remus sank to the floor, burying his head in his knees and praying that Sirius would be home soon.

He wasn't afraid of the dark. No adult was afraid of the dark. He just didn't like it. It made him uncomfortable. It made his hands shake and his thoughts get jumbled and his chest feel tight. He wasn't afraid of the dark. He was afraid of what could happen in the dark.

After an unknown amount of time, the door creaked open and Remus heard Sirius's heavy boots landing on the hardwood floors.

"Moons?" he called out.

Remus grumbled in response, not ready to stop hiding.

He could hear Sirius making his way to the kitchen. Sirius let out a small noise when he saw Remus curled up on the floor and started murmuring something.

Remus couldn't hear what he was saying, but he didn't much care. Sirius was here. He'd be safe soon.

After a few minutes, Sirius gently touched his boyfriend's arm.

"It's alright, love," he said. "You can look up."

It was only his trust in Sirius that allowed Remus to look up and when he did, he was stunned. Sirius had conjured strings of muggle fairy lights which covered the ceiling, gently twinkling and lighting up the whole apartment. From where he was sitting, he could see across into their living room, where every piece of furniture had been framed with more lights, making sure there were no dark corners.

As he looked around, Sirius slid down the wall onto the floor next to him and pulled him against his chest.

"I promise, Moony, you'll never have to be in dark again. Not as long as I'm around."

[spiritstar477]

I’m sorry but I’m not actually. I made myself cry last night so I needed to share.

Regret - Wolfstar - sfw - angst/hurt no comfort

Overjoyed doesn’t cover it. Elation doesn’t cover it. The feelings that Remus felt when he learned that Sirius was not only innocent but had also escaped were far more powerful. The few minutes in the shack was all the time they had before Sirius left again to go into hiding. And Remus wouldn’t see him for a long time after that.

When they did see each other again, Sirius was quick to admit his feeling for Remus. How he’d loved Remus for a long time. Remus sat there, across the sofa, smile on his lips. He looked at Sirius, his epic love, the man he loved, the man he’d always love, the man he loved before he knew what love was, before either of them existed, before the universe existed. He looked at his gaunt skin, his dull hair, his near lifeless eyes, his far too thin frame, his hands that tremor now; he was just as beautiful as the day Remus lost him.

And this is Remus’ biggest regret. He told him he loved him. He’d always loved him and he always will love him. That Sirius is his beginning, middle and end. But he also told him they couldn’t be together. That they were both ill. Mentally ill. And they needed to heal and it wasn’t fair to themselves or each other. That they had all the time in the world now.

Then Remus lost him to a shot from his own cousin, while stood in just the wrong place, in just the wrong angle. He fell so slowly through the veil, stealing him away, leaving them without even a body to bury. If it weren’t for Harry there, lamenting his godfather, desperately trying to follow, to help, Remus would have walked right through that veil after him. He would have done it with a smile on his face.

When the battle raged on around them —they didn’t know it yet but it was the final battle of the decades long war— there was a curse cast and a flash, and Remus knew. With a smile on his face, his body hits the ground because he knows he gets to see Sirius again. His love. His life. His everything.

[writer-of-sorts]

written with @wolfstarmicrofic prompt: train

The stranger on the train is dressed in ripped jeans, a black undershirt and a leather jacket, with heavy mascara lining his eyelids and a row of piercings lining his ears.

Despite his punk appearance, the man undeniably has the air of an aristocrat. He sits straight-backed and prim, one knee crossed over the other. A sketchbook rests atop the expensive-looking bag tucked against his side.

When Remus approaches him, the stranger looks up. The long hair curtaining his face draws back, revealing alabaster skin, sharp cheekbones, full lips and soulful grey eyes.

Quite frankly, Remus thinks this stranger is the most beautiful person he has ever seen.

Which is exactly why Remus stutters incoherently before proceeding to trip over his own lanky legs and swear like a sailor as he goes crashing down to the floor of the train compartment.

Except he’s not crashing down to the floor. Because there is a pair of very strong leather-clad arms holding him up.

Said arms straighten Remus’ body and then drop as he comes face-to-face with his savior. His very attractive savior, who just witnessed Remus nearly fall flat on his face.

Remus feels his cheeks grow hot as embarrassment washes over him.

“Es-tu blessé?” the stranger asks, eyebrows furrowed with concern.

And now Remus feels hot for an entirely different reason. He opens his mouth, then closes it wordlessly.

“Oh,” the man says. He smiles sheepishly. “Are you alright?” he asks, with just the faintest trace of an accent as he rolls his mouth around the r’s.

“Yes,” Remus breathes. He clears his throat. “My name is Remus, and” —he points to the empty seat across from the man— “I believe that is my seat.”

The stranger flashes a genuine smile, and Remus’ heart soars. “Sirius Black. Please sit down.”

word count: 300

[tealeavesandtrash]

Wolfstar Micro Fic - @wolfstarmicrofic prompt: Prefect's Bathroom - 97 words

Sirius catches his hand, pulling him through the door with the muttered password Remus knows Sirius shouldn’t have. But he can’t find it in himself to care, not with the sensation of Sirius’ warm palm against his, the twinkle in his eye and grin on his lips that makes Remus weak in the knees.

The prefect’s bathroom is quiet. Curfew has passed and Remus should be finishing off his rounds if Sirius wasn’t such a distraction. But Sirius is toying at the hem of his jumper, fingers skirting over skin and Remus just melts into the touch.

[twisted-tales-told]

hi! hate to be lame by lizzy mcalpine?

I gotta tag @sophsicle because ik u like these guys

Sirius is watching Remus read. He’s always liked doing that. His face scrunches up when something annoys him. He laughs sometimes, and seems totally oblivious about it. He bites his nails absent mindedly.

This time, Remus looks over at him. Catches him staring.

“What?” He laughs, and oh, that look. Those soft eyes Sirius revels in. That make him feel so special.

“You’re cute when you read.”

Something else flashes behind his expression. Something like hurt. And Sirius wants to take it back. He doesn’t know what he’s done wrong, but he hates that he’s the cause.

[resident-gay-bitch]

For my “I’m bored so give me a number between 1-50 and I’ll pick the correlating song from my playlist, and give you a marauders headcannon about it!” game!

@stxr-bxy picked number 15 which is: Feel Good by Yot Club

This song for me is such a summer late night drives song, so have some James and Sirius. This can be taken romantic or platonic, whichever you prefer :)) irs just a little fluffy headcannon.

But then you also get a second one because the vibe of my original thought does not correlate with the lyrics AT ALL. The song is about being in a stable relationship but still having a sense of doubt or not feeling good, soooo you get some sirius angst, internalised queer pining and major denial for this one :) also that one’s written in fic format too :) <3

★ ★ ★

THE FIRST ONE:

It’s summer after seventh year, they’re at the peak of the war and everything’s hard. But Sirius has just finished his bike. It flies and everything. He begs James to take it for a test run.

The air is hot outside, almost humid. Sirius’ hair is sticking out from under his helmet that he’s painted all over, and he’s grinning wider than ever. He even made a helmet special for James, with his nickname written over it and everything.

They hop on the bike, it’s so dark out, only the steet lights lighting the way. Sirius takes off, spreading through the little town and laughing as the wind whips at his skin.

James is holding him around the waist, laughing as they race along the road.

And then they lift off, taking to the air. James grips Sirius tighter, tucking his chin over Sirius’ shoulder to hold on for deer life. Sirius is laughing and James is screaming in his ear, begging for Sirius to let him make it home in one piece or his mum would kill them both.

Just James and Sirius letting go and enjoying a nice moment together after school, before everything goes to absolute shit.

THE SECOND ONE:

Sirius rolls over in bed, panting as he lies flat on his back. He looks up at the top of the canopy, a hand over his chest, skin sweaty. His chest feels hollow.

Beside him, Mary sighs, sitting up to sip her water. She’s beautiful, so beautiful, as she always is. So Sirius doesn’t know why he feels like this.

She leans over and kisses him, brushing his curls out of his eyes. He smiles up at her, kisses her back and then smacks a few on her cheeks for good measure. She hops up to shower, walking away, naked with an enticing shake of her hips.

But Sirius doesn’t watch. He pinches the bridge of his nose and hates himself.

He loves her.

He really really really loves her.

What’s not to love about her? She’s truely the most brilliant woman Sirius has ever had the pleasure of meeting. And they’re good, they’re stable. They have their own flat, and an anniversary coming up, and James has been telling him that the girls think he’s gonna propose. He should propose. They’re in love, for fucks sake, have been for years. Well, that’s what everyone else thinks.

Sirius feels sick thinking about it too long.

He just… doesn’t love her like that. He can’t. No matter how hard he tries it just feels… there’s something missing. Something wrong.

He should feel good, he should feel happy, but he doesn’t.

He feels safe with her, at home, but it’s still not enough.

There’s something wrong with him. He knows there’s something wrong with him. Something that makes him feel sick.

It tears him down until he breaks. It makes him numb, and fake, and horrible to be around. He lashes out, cries, and isolates. He doesn’t even know why Mary sticks around, why’d she’d even want him to propose.

He tells her he loves her, all the time, but surely she can feel how much of a lie that is, right? Or maybe he’s just gotten so good at pretending that she can’t tell anymore.

Maybe she just wants to be loved so desperately for something other than her body that she can take what she can get. Maybe she likes that Sirius isn’t constantly trying to fuck her; he prefers when they just have a nice meal, or cuddle up to read on the couch.

Maybe she does know and feels the same as he does.

He hopes that’s the way. The last thing he wants to do is to hurt her.

He rolls over and looks at his bedside table, at the picture he has framed there of the Marauders fresh out of school. He looks at one face in particular; scarred and freckled, honey brown eyes and sandy hair, and he feels his stomach flip. A longing sense of desire grows within.

But he ignores that, and follows Mary into the shower.

Okay holy fuck I really like that second one. I started writing it with no real direction but UGH I both love and hate how it turned out. So angsty and justice for Mary, but OHHHHHHHHH I LOVE IT.

[axxio-sriracha]

a marylily fic please? <3

YAY ONE I HAVE NEVER WRITTEN BEFORE!

Thank you so much for the request! I hope this is alright for my first attempt haha

I bring you all the good fluff and stuff and a LOT of pining.

~~~♤~~~

When Words Fail, My Heart Finds Yours...

~~~♤~~~

Lily Evans climbed the stairs to the astronomy tower, grateful to finally have some time alone. She loved all of her friends, but sometimes being a part of the popular group was... well it was a lot.

"Room for one more?" She asked, knocking gently as she opened the door.

Regulus Black turned from his seat on the half wall, one leg dangling over the edge and a cigarette raised to his lips, "Yeah, c'mon up, Evans." He nodded.

She closed the door behind her, settling against the wall opposite him and dusting off her fishnets. She joined him in watching over the grounds, the people seemed so small from up in the tower.

"You smoke?" He asked, offering her one. She shook her head,

"Not really my thing, no."

He just nodded and turned back to the lawn.

They had shared each other's company here before, both of them outcasts at heart that somehow found purchase in a well known group of friends. She enjoyed his company, his quiet presence was comforting.

"You watch the game today?" She asked, striking up conversation, "Gryffindor vs. Hufflepuffs."

He shook his head, "I don't normally watch the ones I don't play in." He took another long drag, "What was the score?"

"Gryffindor won, I don't know the numbers."

He gave her an amused look, "If I wasn't a Seeker I'd be pissed at you right now."

She only shrugged, "I've never been one for sports."

"Why do you go?"

"All my friends are either playing or watching, its just easier to be where they are."

He raised an eyebrow, "Is it" He asked. She lifted a shoulder again,

"I suppose."

"Are those friends my brother's group?" He asked. There wasn't any real curiosity in his eyes, she knew he was just trying to keep up the conversation. She nodded,

"Yeah. I'm friends with his boyfriend Remus, Peter and I get along really well, I don't know James too well at all though."

"Do you want to?" He asked.

She could tell he was aiming for casual, tossing the cigarette bud to the ground and stomping it out with his combat boot.

But she could see the sudden interest in his eyes when he looked up at her, carefully blowing the smoke in the other direction.

"I don't know. I suppose I should."

"What do you mean you suppose?"

"Well, you know, everyone said he had a crush on me forever ago. I don't know, he's popular and funny and he's got good manners. I probably should get to know him a little better."

"I am going to be honest with you Evans. I don't give a shit about what other people think. It isn't what you're supposed to do. It's what you want to do. What do you want?"

She hesitated, "I don't know. It would be nice to get to know him..."

"But?" He prompted.

"I was just never really interested before."

"Are you now?"

That look sparked again in his eyes, She wondered what it was about Potter that made his eyes alive, that drew out a stronger reaction than the permanant indifferent expression on his face.

"I'm not sure." She paused, looking to the lake again, "No." She whispered, "I don't like him."

"There's someone else." He guessed, studying her own face.

She hesitated once more before she nodded, "Yeah, there is."

"Alright, come here." He muttered, holding out a hand towars her. His chipped black nail polish identical to her own.

"What?"

"Don't give me that look. Come, sit in front of me." He patted the stone again, still holding out his hand.

She stared at him, waiting to see if this was a joke or not. They'd never shared more than a half hearted, smoke hazed conversation. Each one usually about the bigoted arseholes at their school and how they couldn't wait to get out and make a difference in the world.

Despite her confusion, she does as he says and swings her own converse over the half wall, letting him keep a hand on her waist to make sure she was secure.

Her oversized smashing pumpkins shirt she wore like a dress pooled around her hips, she adjusted it carefully to cover the top of her thighs.

He leans forward a little, dropping his voice,

"May I touch your hair?" He asked quietly, "You're allowed to say no."

She narrowed her eyes and nodded, "Fine. But don't you dare push me."

"Well, seeing as that would be attempted murder, I think you're safe, Evans." He laughed softly.

He gathered up a a small section of her hair into his hands, combing his fingers through it gently and making her already poofy curls even poofier.

"Pandora has me do this for her whenvever we have a serious conversation, it helps her relax." He explained.

Lily couldnt help but smile at the way his voice caught on the word serious, it was amusing to think even all those years ago his brother was still tormenting him with the name.

"Tell me about the person you like."

Lily waited for a long time before she spoke, trying to find the right words to say, "Her name is Mary." She started, testing the waters.

If Regulus was surprised it was a she, he didn't show it, he simply nodded and moved on to combing his fingers through a new section.

Lily took a deep breath, steeling her resolve, "She's popular and she's really close with my other friends Marlene, Dorcas, and Alice. She's the one who introduced me to them first year."

Regulus hummed, keeping his touch light and his movements steady as he moved on to braiding.

Lily could understand now why Regulus' friend has him do this, it was a lot easier to speak now that her body was more relaxed,

"Sometimes I wonder about the way she looks at me y'know. It feels like the way I used to see Remus looking at-" She trailed off, not wanting to force him to hear about his brother's love story, "Well, it's just sometimes I think that maybe she likes me, and she just hasn't told me yet."

She could hear Regulus' breathing, slow and calming, she wondered if he was doing it on purpose for her to slow down her own breaths.

"Do you think you could ask her how she feels?" He asked. Lily shook her head slightly, careful not to mess up the next braid he was starting on,

"I don't know if that's a good idea. What if I'm wrong? Wouldn't that just ruin our friendship forever?"

Regulus hummed again, "It's true, things aren't the same once you cross that line between platonic and romantic, but that doesnt mean you can't still be friends."

She sighed, "What if she hates me for this? We're supposed to be best friends, what if she thinks I'm some sort of creep for having feelings for her?"

Regulus gently touched her shoulder, drawing her eyes up to his, "Evans, you're not abusing your friendship with her in any way. Just you worrying about her feelings through all of this proves that. You have nothing to worry about. I'm sure she will still care for you and respect you the same as she always has."

"What if she doesnt?" She asked. Regulus dropped his eyes. She could see he was struggling with emotions of his own,

"We'll then I'm here if you ever need to do this again." He whispered, turning back to focusing on her hair. He pulled the front pieces forwards and started working on a braid to her left side.

"Thanks." She whispered back. He nodded,

"Anytime."

~~~♤~~~

Lily sat down at lunch, her usual seat between Dorcas and Mary- Marlene and Alice on their other sides- and across from Remus and his friends.

"Where'd you dissappear earlier? I went to ask Mary where you went so I could talk to you about the essay but nobody knew." Remus asked, looking concerned.

Lily shrugged, "I was getting some fresh air. It was a nice morning."

Peter looked up from his plate, "Why do you sound suspicious?" He asked.

Lily's eyes widened, "What?"

Remus placed a hand on his friend's arm, "Wormtail, we've talked about this." He muttered. Peter nodded and went back to his food.

"Talked about what?" Mary asked, joining in on the conversation.

Remus gave a small laugh, "Pete has this weird thing where he can usually tell when people are lying. I had to tell him not to get involved in other people's conversations since it's not always a well received party trick."

"So he thinks she's lying?" Mary asked turning to Lily, "What would you be lying about?"

Peter looked up again, shooting an apologetic look at Remus before clarifying, "I don't think she's lying, just hiding something."

"I'm not hiding anything." She told him, then winced when his eyebrows furrowed, entirely unconvinced.

Sirius looked over then too, noticing Remus' distraction, "What's happening?" He asked, tugging on his boyfriend's sleeve.

Dorcus answered before he could, Lily wasn't even are she'd been paying attention, "Mary's trying to figure out what Lily's hiding."

The way she worded it made Lily's cheeks heat up. She looked away, accidentally finding herself staring at the Slytherin table.

Silver eyes stared back at her, concerned.

This made her blush worse, Regulus cocked an eyebrow.

"I just-" She shook her head, "I just went for some fresh air before lunch, is that really such a crime? Why is everyone getting involved?" She huffed.

"Woah, someone's getting defensive." Marry laughed, poking her side, "C'mon, chica, what's going on?"

Lily could never lie to Mary, it was the one person she never managed to sneak anything past. The name only made her more nervous,

"I was hanging out with Regulus." She blurted.

She hadn't meant to say it, but it was definitley an easier secret to let out than the other one.

Mary's hand stilled on her waist, her eyes wide.

Everyone glanced at Sirius, who sat shocked into stillness, his smile dropping,

"What?" He whispered.

Lily looked past him, Regulus must have read his name on her lips, his own eyes wide with panic.

Sirius turned to look where she was staring, noticing he was already looking too.

"Lily, what the fuck?" He asked quietly.

Sirius and Regulus weren't close, in fact- to everyone who didn't know them- you'd think they hated each other.

But Lily knew the pain on both sides when their names were brought up, she was familiar with Regulus' regretful and pained expression, the one Sirius had on right now.

"You were hanging out with my brother? Why didn't you tell me?" He pressed, waiting for an answer.

She shook her head, "I didn't plan it or anything, it just sort of happened. We both went to the same spot to calm down and ever since it kind of-"

"It's happened more than once?" He hissed.

Remus put a quiet hand on Sirius' arm, his other pulling Sirius' face to look at him.

Sirius let out a breath, closing his eyes for a moment before turning back to Lily, "How um... How is he?" He asked, his voice suddenly small.

"He's okay." She nodded, "Really, he's okay. He misses you."

Sirius looked away, his eyes glued to his and Remus' now interlaced fingers.

"And Potter too, I think." She added, trying to lighten the subject a little.

Potter sat up suddenly, he'd been paying attention ever since he heard her confession about Regulus.

"What? How- when- what?" He stammered.

She shrugged, "I don't really know anything he just acted a little different when we were talking about you." She replied. Maybe bringing up Potter was a bad decision too...

"You- You two... you and him... you talked about me?" He asked incredulously, looking a bit pale now.

She only shrugged, knowing she probably shouldn't say anything else, everything she did seemed to make people panic.

"Prongs? You alright, mate?" Remus asked, looking between both of their pale faces and wide eyes.

James stood from his seat, "I'm gonna head to the bathroom, be right back." He squeaked out before he tumbled over the bench.

Lily turned back to Mary when she felt a sudden hand in her hair, "I like these on you." She whispered, "Did um... did he do them?"

She looked into Mary's eyes, filled with hesitation.

"Yeah, he was trying to help me relax, I guess his friend Pandora and him do it a lot." She spoke without thought.

She really couldn't keep anything from Mary for long. Nothing except the one thing that mattered, the one thing that could tear their friendship apart.

Mary dropped her hand, looking away, "I like that you're making other friends chica. I know it's hard for you sometimes to feel like you fit in here. But just... just be careful okay? I don't want you to get hurt."

Lily frowned, "Reg won't hurt me." She whispered, "We don't really talk much anyways, today was the first time we had a real conversation."

"Do you like him?" She asked.

Lily saw it, that same spark she'd seen in Regulus' eyes when he talked about Potter.

Lily shook her head immediatley, the small braids moving with her, "No, absolutley not. He's a friend... sort of. Nothing more."

Mary nodded, letting out a quiet sigh that sounded like relief, "Okay. You're still my best friend right?" She asked.

"Of course, you'll always be my number one."

Mary pulled her into a hug, her chin resting on Lily's shoulder.

"Love you, chica." She whispered.

"Love you too, Mary." Lily smiled back, tucking her face to hide her blush.

~~~♤~~~

"Hey, do you have any mascara I could borrow?" Mary asked, digging through her makeup bag, "I can't find mine, I think I might've lost it."

It was later that same day, the group was getting ready to go out to hogsmeade. Lily got up from where she sat on Mary's bed, watching her go through her routine,

"Uh... mascara? I think I have that." She nodded.

Lily wasn't that much into makeup, she just loved the way eyeliner looked and sometimes did dark lipstick. Mary was always the one who knew how to use all the shimmery stuff to make herself look different.

"It's a long tube, should say mascara on it." Mary explained, moving on to combing her hair. She used a small brush to gel the little hairs into curvy shapes, it was always Lily's favorite part.

"Here." Lily handed it to her, their fingers brushing together briefly and sending little shocks through her.

"Do you want me to put some on you? I think you look really pretty without any makeup on, but your eyelashes are so long already, they would look good with mascara too."

"On me?" Lily repeated, swallowing hard.

Mary nodded, setting her hair products down and turning to face her, "I don't think you should use and foundation or anything, I really love your freckles." She whispered, her fingers reaching out to brush Lily's cheek.

Lily could feel her face heating up under Mary's stare.

"Thank you." She mumbled.

"Do you mind if I put this on?" Mary asked quietly. Lily shook her head,

"No, I don't mind."

She followed Mary's instructions, sitting on the bathroom counter in front of her. Mary stood between her knees, her fingers holding Lily's face with the lightest touch possible.

"Close your eyes." Mary whispered, a light tickle on her eyelashes startled her and she opened them again.

Mary laughed softly, "It's okay, love, it's just the brush, it won't hurt."

Love. Lily felt her heart flutter.

She nodded and closed her eyes again, letting Mary do whatever it was she was doing.

"Okay, look at me." Mary mumbled. Lily opened her eyes again, finding Mary's quickly. She was biting her lip in concentration, looking at Lily intensely.

It didn't help that their faces were so close together, Lily's heart fluttered faster.

"Blink when I tell you to okay?" She whispered. Lily nodded.

She tried to follow the instructions the best that she could, watching Mary's face as she blinked every other second, the mascara brushing underneath her eyelashes.

"Okay." Mary leaned back a little, "I think it looks good.

She closed the bottle and set it beside them, her hand falling to rest on Lily's thigh.

"You look beautiful, chica." She whispered a soft smile on her lips.

Lily couldn't speak, she could still feel the ghost of Mary's breath across her face, a tingling sensation where her fingers had tipped her chin to get a better angle.

"C'mon, we should find you something to wear." She held out a hand to help Lily down, keeping them together as she walked her to their shared closet.

"I was thinking about the outfit I wore last month, the one with the Fleetwood Mac shirt."

Mary nodded, clapping her hands excitedly, "Ooh, I loved that one! I'm gonna go change, I'll be right out and the bathroom's all yours."

She picked up a pile of clothes from her bed and closed the door behind her. Lily let herself fall back onto the mattress, this had been one very long day.

"Knock, knock." Dorcas walked into the room, followed by Marlene.

"Hey guys." Lily mumbled, not bothering to sit up.

"You alright? Everyone's been worried about you today."

"Yeah I'm okay. Everything's just a little weird right now."

"Yeah, tell me about it." Marlene nodded, "Sirius and Remus haven't left their room all day apparently and James isn't anywhere to be found either. Pete's running around like a chicken with his head cut off, he's got no clue what to do."

Lily laughed softly and shook her head, "I don't know what's up with Potter, but I do feel really bad about hurting Sirius. I didn't mean for anything like that to happen."

"We know, hun." Dorcas walked over and sat down by her side, running a hand through the parts of her hair that weren't pulled into braids, "You and his brother get along, then?"

Lily shrugged, "I guess. It's one of those friends by circumstance situations."

"What do you guys even talk about?" Marlene asked curiously.

Lily's eyes shot to the bathroom before she could stop them, Dorcas raised an eyebrow,

"Does he know?" She asked quietly.

"Yeah, he was talking to me about Potter and then he asked if I liked him and then he could tell there was someone else and it kind of just came out." She let the words whoosh out of her in one breath.

"Hey babes, bathroom is free." Mary called, closing the door with her hip, "Oh, hi guys."

Marlene snorted, "Damn girl, what a weird web you've spun for yourself this time."

Dorcas sighed, "You should just tell her, Lily. It'll make everything a lot easier for both of you."

Dorcas and Marlene shared a look and stood, "We were actually just heading out, see you two in a bit!" Dorcas pulled Marlene out of the room, shooting a look back at Lily.

"Weirdos." Mary smiled as she watched then leave.

"Hey Mary?" Lily whispered. Mary turned,

"What's up?"

"Do you think that-" She cleared her throat, "It's not really important or anything, but I was just wondering if, um..."

Lily looked away again, her face scorching.

Mary frowned and sat down in front of her, "Lils? Talk to me, what's going on?"

Lily shook her head, unable to find her voice.

"Come here." Lily pulled her up and held her against her chest, holding her securely in her arms.

Lily relaxed instantly, letting herself be enveloped by everything Mary.

Her smell, like hairspray and vanilla, her warm voice and caring eyes, her gentle but steady touch.

"I love you, chica." Mary whispered, pulling away to meet eyes.

Lily felt her own get a little wider, the words not forming properly.

Something seemed to click then, Mary's expression changed from worried to searching, hesitation filling her eyes again just like they had at lunch,

"Lily?" She whispered.

Lily looked away.

"I love you." There was something different about the way she said it now, her voice was breathless, her expression serious.

"I love you too, Mary." Lily whispered.

Her eyes dropped to Lily's lips and Lily could feel her entire being freeze in place. Sparks of anticipation shot through her.

Oh, Merlin, how did they end up here?

The next thing she knew she was being pulled into a kiss, her heart slamming against her chest, their hands coming up to hold each other closer.

"I love you." Mary breathed when they broke apart, "Fuck, I love you so much."

"I love you too." Lily smiled, kissing her again, and again, and again, "I always have."

It wasn't exactly the huge, production level confession she was expecting. It was small and wordless, something private and so entirely theirs.

They didn't need to say anything for them both to know exactly how strong they felt for each other, and they walked down the stairs to the common room a half hour later, smiling and holding hands, feeling their friend's eyes on them the whole way.

"We're dating." Mary spoke, breaking the confused silence, she had a proud smile on her face as she looked over at Lily, "This is my girlfriend."

Girlfriend. Lily found she loved that word.

Lily's confession to hanging out with Sirius' brother led them to talking again too. Regulus was brought to their weekend hogsmeade trips, and even sometimes found perched on the arm of the couch in the Gryffindor common room, talking with his brother in low voices and hesitant smiles.

That was probably a good thing, seeing as they would stay girlfriends for a long, long time.

~~~♤~~~

A month had gone by and Lily and Mary were happier than ever, they fit perfectly together, like they were made just for this.

They were all giggles and urgent touches as they flung open a broom closet in a deserted corridor, tumbling inside without breaking their kiss.

A muffled groan of pain and a surprised hiss sounded before the lights flicked on.

Inside, in a very similar position to them, were James Potter and Regulus Black, making out.

Lily gasped, her eyes wide.

"So..." Regulus flushed, looking up at Lily, "I see you and Mary got together." He started awkwardly.

She rose an amused eyebrow and glanced at Potter, "And I see you finally managed to snog Potter."

Potter's face went bright red and he hid himself in the crook of Regulus' neck.

"I think we should probably give them some space." Mary finally decided, pulling Lily's hand and closing the door behind them.

The four never spoke of the incident, but the boys came out to the group a week later, both of them flicking glances at the girls the whole time.

It was perfect, everything was exactly as it was meant to be. Lily and Reg continued their chats on the astronomy tower, gushing about their partners and complaining as always about anything and everything else in the world.

Lily couldn't help but smile as she held her girlfriend while she slept, the girl who- just a month ago- was so completely unattainable in her eyes.

She was never happier, and she supposed she had Regulus to thank for a lot of it.

~~~♤~~~