#wjat fucking ever
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the dichotomy of "free healthcare is slow and paid healthcare is fast" is absolutely fucking false. guess who is waiting well over 4 months to have an introductory appointment with a neurologist (for its very scary and dangerous seizures) and has to pay out its ass for it.
#when i needed a neuropsych eval to figure out what the fuck was up with these Other Episodes i have sometimes it was like. a year and a half#out and it ended up being canceled so i still don't know what the deal is with that. wjat ever.
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My brother in CHRIST, I cannot stop thinking about Hugh Jackman's abs
#i swear to god i dont like him#but that one deadpool scene had my jaw on the floor#i dont think i will ever recover#ALSO#Josh Hartnett got shirtless in Trap too?????#why are all these guys getting shirtless and where is my deleted shirtless Longlegs scene#“but hes not in shape” DOES IT LOOK LIKE I FUCKING CARE WJAT HE LOOKS LIKE#who let me be this attracted to men. someone please snap me out of it#i dont even like muscular guys but that scene did something to ms#*me#maybe it was the mask?#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine
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i honestly love the petals name. But because you call us requesters ‘pollen’ and ‘honey’ idk if we should be called the bees.. (as in we help get you working/writing?) or the petals.. (as in we're the roots of what you write maybe? No idea ehe)
tbh; just stick to whatever you like the most!! Tho I like being called a petal for my personal opinion
-🫚anon
I was talking to @cupiddoves about this a while ago and I'm still unsure of what to call you guys atp but I'm imagining I'm talking to myself while everyone thinks I'm crazy, as you guys are like helping me and then each post makes you all in like a body until the post request is done and you become bees/petals)whatever again and the characters have no memory of it whatsoever but remembers it very faintly (edit That DOES NOT make sense to me but like ok so they remember not all of it but it's like, when you hear a name or something like that you get nostalgic feelings about it)
Anyways teeehee😁
(please god help m-)
Make sure to read my tags ...... BC I add words to them as well ☹️ (unless your Sirius/cupiddoves... Then don't rea-)
🫚 anon you can send more asks if you want I'm still writing the first bits I don't care how many you send I'll get them done whenever i am done with the first(I WRITE A LOT.....) I don't mind whatever you send, I already know your preference, you don't like angst and I understand that👍🏼👍🏼
#aaaaaaaaaaaa hey its jude or bee#stardew valley#art#harvey stardew valley#stardew valley harvey#harvey sdv#stardew harvey#harvey stardew x male reader#sdve#sdv#stardew farmer#stardew sebastian#art asks#asks#ask reply#asks open#reqs open#sdv harvey#sdv sebastian#my petals and bees#judes little bees#judes lovely petals#anon ask#HIII 🫚 ANON!!#i see your request for THE FUCKING WIZARD. THE WIZARD .. (I would've loved harvey too.... BHT THE WIZARD?? Its ok I get jt)#But like my thought on that specific req...Like.. I knew what i could've done with harvey..BUT THE WIZARD.. shiii- you are into them older.#i got you though jts ok I just need some time to finish the first ask you send and tjen the actual first ask i ever got from spooky-bunnys#theure so lovely omg but yeha i got you bro!!!#dont eber feel shy or embarrassed to write wjat yoy wanna read!! i can do it for ylu!! besides i finished my resume i got the time now!!#if youre my beloved sirius seeing this .. you probably are bc i tagged you... ermmm.. hello🤗🤗 i am so nice to them dont worry
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just remembered july is the birthday month of both don and olivia. easily the most important month of the year
#skye's ramblings#also oh my god origamiking is turning 4 wjat the fuck guys it hasnt been that long pmtok is the new papermarios game. it's new#well what ever im not thinking about that anymore time is scary. 2020 wasn't a real year anyway
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hi guys. im sick so i'll be answering any rat egg questions y'all have
#not a confession#freakblr#🐀🥚#tbe rats here have such fucking short lifespans#maurice lived the lonhest i think but they disappeared#qnd then emile. the one who laid eghs in the libing room and wjat started this whole rat eggs thing#i think emile actually genuinely got mad at us#bc they ended up in a rqt trap#and it somehow managed to escape#but their fur was all ripped out from its body and dhit#and so whenever my family saw it#they knew that emile was like mad asf at us#my dad said it had some look of anger idk#BUT. update: my mom said she saw like. a new rat and shit#wondeirng ehat we should name itm#acthallt guys send me name suggestions#tmf#the music freaks#this js the WORST explanation i gave ever gjven#and what makes it worse is that these rats hage actually fucked with my head i swear#anyways i think emile disappeared thats wjyvmy mom thinks she saw like some new rat
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every time i see any post about the election i get a little bit closer to turning off my phone and walking into the ocean
#morrisounds#do you ever get tired#do you ever just get so fucking tired#wjat the fuck am i even supposed to do anymore
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CRYING WORST UNI TEACHER EVER JUST FAILED!!!!!!!!!!!! JANNA AND ME BOTH!!!!!!!!!!!! NEARLY FOUR MONTHS AFTER WE HANDED IN OUR PAPERS sorry for screaming hahahahahah
#listen we don’t know what to do we might not be able to start our masters WORST DAY EVER#THIS IS INSANE WJAT THE FUCK BASED ON WHAT GROUNF#NO EXPLANATION BTW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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To every person who makes long lists or long reviews of media and doesn’t put any of it behind a readmore I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you
#ven.txt#WHY THE FUCK AN I SCROLLING PAST#AN AUTHORS ENTIRE BIOGRAPHY !!!!!!#TO FIND POSTS PEOPLE MADE ABOUT READING THE FUCKING BOOK#WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM#I GET when reblog chains are long like you can’t put a readmore anywhere bc it’s not one person#but WJAT IS WRONG WITH THESE FUCKING PEOPLE POSTING YHE LONGEST SHIT IVE EVER SEEN SOLELY WROTTEN BY THEM WITH NO READMORE#WHAT THE HELL#I’m pretty sure I am far more angry than is appropriate but this has annoyed me for so long#and I just can’t hold it back
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For some reason my brain decided to make a long rant in the tags, so uh yeah got that for anyone that wants to see it.
my mom loves to lie and like she always swears she was NEVER homophobic or anything to me as a child “i even have a gay work friend” but a really funny memory resurfaced recently where i asked if i could use birthday money i had to buy a rainbow flag when i was like ??? 7?? because i LOVED rainbows. and she said no that means something Evil and god will hate you . so what did i do. but ask my grandmom for a rainbow sweater for christmas and proceed to only wear that sweater for three years when it got cold because i didnt like the idea that god hated colors and i wanted to challenge him
#long rant#cw homophobia#cw really shitty stuff i found homophobic people spewing#for some bullshit reason some religious ppl think queer ppl stole the rainbow. from god. I've heard this shit said unironically before#like some ppl think queer folk saw the rainbow used a sign of salvation in the bible and went fuck off and took it the show their pride#got some text from a shitty religious website that sums up what some ppl think better than i did#*ahem*#the LGBTQ+ movement has attempted to steal from God himself#one of the most significant demonstrations of redemptive love in the Bible.#When most people in our culture see a rainbow#they do not think of God’s patient determination to extend salvation to a sinful#but instead recognize a symbol of destructive sexuality#wjat the fuck#like sorry for ranting in the tags but what the fuck#ok wait holy fuckin shit#apparently back in 2017 some shithead named Bryan Fischer who i don't believe I've heard of before btw#well he hosted one of those christian radio things#apparently he fucking insisted “homosexuality gave us Adolf Hitler” how godamn stupid can someone fucking be#hitler killed anyone who was different including queer folk and then this man goes on his shitty little talk show and says fucking that????#i am falling down a rabbit hole of how fucking insane can this hate spew get#should probably stop now tho#so uh one last quote that makes me question how insane this Bryan Fischer dude is#“Worst example of cultural appropriation ever: LGBTs stole the rainbow from God. It's his. He invented it. Gen. 9:11-17. Give it back.”#what the hell
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of course i lost my favorite fucking bracelet
#like i lit never take it off and i look down and its just GONE????#like wjat the fuck#also cant find it anywhere in my house so i def lost it outside#its gone forever and i genuinely am more upset than ive ever been#like fuck bro#okk byee!!
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Realized im now afraid of dating
#rant#shame theres no tjerapy for that :/ wjat kinds there are i already kinda went over witj a therapsit twice#its more just. i now feel super sick to my stomacj and terrified when approacjed in a romantic context by a stranger#its FINE if they wanna be friends and we get to know eacj other THEN say if we wanna date#but if a stranger comes up to me like: lets date? fucking makes me sweat and feel awful#maybe its cause im demirokantic demisexual. and know i wont feel particularly butterfly feelkngs or warm or excited#fkr like 3-5 months even if i DO develop a crush. and so tje fear hits: fear theyll break up with me before i even know if i could like them#fear theyll want sex or kissing before i feel atrraction. then break up witj me when im not ready yet#fear ill Pretend to like them just so i can stay with them for 3 months to see if i Could like them romantically#and the idea of Pretending and people pleasing in thqt way makes me sick to my fucking stomach#and then of course: the fear i do finally develop a crush in 3-5 months at which point theyre annoyed i didnt like them as much in#the initial months. so they dump me for someone wholl sleep with them sooner. and im heartbroken for 2-5 years#but mostly im concerned with my irrational fears: that theyll hate that im not able to crush for a few months IF ever#and they wont commujicate that. and theyll break up almost immediately thinking im cold when im just slow to develop feelings#and then if i liked them As A Friend well ill be SAD. and if we couldve falllen in love i wont know cause i didnt have time to find out#i didnt used to be afraid of all this. but i haveny dated in 5 years so i guess it just has settled in due to lack of practice :c#id rather suffocate than practice tbh. id rather get to know potential dates as FRIENDS for 3 months first ;-;#but ppl dont really wanna do that :c#id really like long term love and sex. but uh. no idea how im going to find it if short term dating scares me this bad#like abxiety attack and not my usual self bad (so they cant even get to know regular ne and see if they like me--they can only meet Anxious#Freajing out scared mejo)
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#it really just feels like every single day is another reminder that im a peripheral at most#im no ones most important im no ones person they want to hang out with constantly im no ones best friend#yeah they dont hate me but they sure as fuck dont find me worth the effort to actually hang out with#and its not like i can blame them im so fucking annoying as is#of course no one fucking invites me to anythig of course they hang out without me and dont even think of inviting me#why would they? i dont mean that much to them#and maybe they wouldnt mean that much to me if i wasnt so fucking lonely that tiny bits of small talk are my standards#for actual conversation#i feel like it just fucking feeds itself#i think im friends ish with someone then i find out that oh they actually hang ojt with everyone ELSE constantly#and. its never even occured to them to invite me#and i just feel so fucking jealous and i dont know if im allowed to say that i would like to hang out or if that would be fucking weird#i dont know if im failing becaus im too annoying too quiet or too distant or too clingy or if they just dont ficking want to hang out with m#i dont know wjat im doing wrong and i dont know if i ever will#i just want to not be a fucking peripheral for fucking once#i just want someone to reach out to me first i want to stop constnalty being the one to try and organize something and getting turned down#and not knowing if its ACTUALLY because they were legit just busy r nows a bad time or if they just dont want to hurt my feelings#i dont know how to tell but s#well. idk maybe if they never fucking try to organize anything i should just tak e the hint
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alr so if all my other friends get an invite and I don't, my bed will be the fucking highway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i m g. o n n a k m. s ! !
#crack mb#abt to kms frrr#like no way I spent all this time#just for everyone else to be special#and I'm just??? here???#idfk what I'm saying wjat#low-key this is all my fault so#I hate that abt me#I wish I cared abt my missing assignments more </3#wtever#it is what it is *fucking bawls sliding down the door*#worst year ever#idk I just feel so left out? kinda hate myself for not being as good as other smh#I'm just here ugh#:(#꒰ ari rambles ꒱.
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oh right, the curse where i experience debilitating period cramps every thanksgiving, i forgot about that.
#the bin#these are the worst period cramps ove ever gad ever#been just shivering on the floor for 3 hours unable to do anything at all because it hurts so much wjat the fuck#contender for most painful experience of mylife#its gone down a little bit but its gettong worse again :( i hate everything#and for some reason i always have my period on thanksgiving and its always extra painful
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#who knew that listening to music would end up with me crying my eyes raw#its still not nearly as paonful as realizing that it was all lies every fucking thing that he saod to me was a fuckong lie#he acts like its a surprise that the fucmong dog that strugles to teust and connect to poeple doesnt really habe mich of a support system#but yeaj sure lets make that dog feel eorse forever by remindign him you CAN fucking connect and interact with people so fucmong easily#and 8ts sucj a fuckong shame hes not like you at all that he cant easly trist anyone ESPECIALLY after you FUCKONG LIED TO HIM ABPUT SO MUCH#yuo probably dont evem actualy care about me do you?im not stupod ive been noticong how distant youve been for while now im not TJAT stupid#duobt yuo wamt me at yuor dog do you? you dnot want to be mt msatwr anynoer do yuo?#wjats the point ofa dog livign wothput a masyer why dnot yuo put me doen pleade put me down before i juat kill myslef#i really shoulndt care about how yuoll react if i could ever fiannly stay dead i sholdve died why the fuvk do i care why cant i stop carong#why cnat i just be arpund people so easily like you do why am i so feral and beoken what dog cnat be arpind people why am i a bad dog why
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i google how to feel less sick from cigarettes i open quora "first, stop smoking" stop being fucking patronizing. stop it. i know i shouldnt be smoking. i am fully aware of the dangers and it is not enough to stop me because addiction runs deeper than logic. just give me the home remedies and stop acting like addicts are suddenly going to stop just because you tell us drugs are bad for us, as if we havent been bombarded with that information, as if we dont carry shame from engaging in something harmful when we know the harm it causes. stop acting like addiction is a matter of moral and intellectual failure instead of a disease stemming from underlying problems that need to be addressed in order for anything to actually change. stop being patronizing and tell me what tea will make me less nauseous. this is fine to reblog but if anyone tries to fucking lecture me about my life choices im blocking you immediately
#addiction cw#smoking cw#venting#back in my fucking addict arc full speed ahead baby!!!!!!!#''wow i was able to quit weed and alcohol preeeetty fast when my schizophrenia made them too dangerous#and the withdrawal symptoms werent ever that bad so i guess im a fake addict lol so glad im better''#jumpcut to me feeling like my body is falling apart because i just HAD to have LITERALLY anything to smoke again#fuck i am in so much pain lol! this shit is so much more painful!!!!#and i am becoming addicted so much fucking faster lol!!! lmao even!!!!!!!!#i keep telling myself that if i just find the right amount to smoke at a time then itll ease the pain without making me even sicker#thats withdrawals baby!!!!!! it has beenthree fucking days and im having withdrawals#it hurts when i smoke it hurts when i dont smoke wjat even is the point#the fact that most people apparently start with 1 or 2 a week and i had to jump in with 1 or 2 a day#or idk maybe its not exactly withdrawals but some other equally shitty thing#idk. i feel like i become dependent on drugs so fucking fast and when i try to research it i feel like im the one being dramatic#like idk why i am in this much pain except maybe that im disabled and my body is at a disadvantage#idk how it all works but idk what word is more accurate than withdrawals
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