#wizard angst

[thegodwhocums]

mental health currently Not Good, sleep quality Not Good At All

if only i had any coping strategies or mechanisms for correcting these sorts of problems

[tnott]

𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝟓 𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄

“Winter” - Tori Amos

Boys get discovered as winter melts Flowers competing for the sun Years go by and I’m here still waiting Withering where some snowman was Mirror mirror, where’s the crystal palace But I only can see myself Skating around the truth, who I am But I know, Dad, the ice is getting thin

"Sense of It All” - Android Lust

Sometimes I feel it’s hard to go on Even to get out of bed Search through my head, focus my eyes Can’t take another step I don’t feel right, but say I’m fine If you should happen to ask I don’t know why my chest feels tight Breath coming in ragged gasps

"Story of Isaac” - Suzanne Vega

You who build these altars now, to sacrifice these children You must not do it anymore For a scheme is not a vision, and you never have been tempted By a demon or a god You who stand above them now, your hatchets blunt and bloody, You were not there before When I lay upon the mountain and my father’s hand was trembling With the beauty of the word

"Hole in the Heart” - Karine Polwart

I made everything come undone I made everything fall apart I quit running to the finishing line And I went back to the start I found a great big hole in the middle of my life Shaped just like my heart

"Remember the Tinman” - Tracy Chapman

If you can tear down the walls Throw your armor away Remove all roadblocks, barricades If you can forget there are bandits And dragons to slay Don’t forget that you defend an empty space

And remember the Tinman Found he had what he thought he lacked Remember the Tinman Go find your heart and take it back

Tagging: @bokketo​ (Hermione and/or Snape), @thcbriightcst​, @wsstandsfor​, @sixvisxpacem​ (muse/s of your choice), @luminescenc1e​ (Draco and/or Pansy and/or Snape), @prioriiincantatem​ (muse/s of your choice)

[doodlemcjazzhands]

Wolfstar Sketches

[sylvanfreckles]

@whumptober-archive

Day Twenty Eight: Alt. 4: Decoy

Summary: The Mighty Nein return to Rexxentrum to confront Caleb's attackers. The plan, surprisingly, goes off with only a slight hitch.

Caleb, still recovering from his injuries, is forced to confront the man who'd tormented him with Trent Ikithon's face alone.

Not as alone as he thought, however...his family is never far away when he needs them.

(Hey! I'm caught back up now!)

[yourgalgremlin]

Fleamont Potter who makes a plan the day he takes in Sirius Black as his own son in 1975.

Fleamont Potter who waits until James makes Regulus his son-in-law to make a heartwarming “father-of-both-grooms” speech at their wedding reception.

Fleamont Potter who leaves said wedding reception to go find Orion Black in his swanky members-only billiards hall—saying:

“Hello, my name is Fleamont Potter. You abused my kids, Sirius & Regulus. They’re fine now, but the same can’t be said for you.”

& then breaks Orion’s kneecap in with his own pool cue.

[The vision]

[cryptidmickle]

so what if. and hear me out. i made my own au for shadowvanilla purposes-

au details below

HELLO SO I PRESENT AMNESIAC AU

so you see, i was minding my business, drawing and looking at cookies and how everyone has their own cool aus with awesome designs and i went "well im not very good at designing but i Love putting characters in Situations"

this au is mostly focused on shadowvanilla so dont be too hopeful I'll get into the other cookies besides their little circle, im ill for gay yaoi only okay

So! motions to comic above, amnesia smilk time! let me elaborate

Pure vanilla fucked up BIG TIME, in that he maybe ventured out to beast yeast alone to try and find out more about the beasts and a way to stop them, as people with a savior complex have a habit of doing. Maybe, perhaps, also at the same time, smilk was getting the workings of his new dough body done and sensing pv was nearby decided to take the opportunity to torment him a little, yknow he cant help himself! he needs to see him

a nasty little fight and confrontation in some old structures of smilk (or at the spire) result in pv using a strange spell he spotted in the surrounding papers and documents, and .... accidentally cracks smilk's soul jam! hehe, oops!

and also sealing his memories. double oops. damn, what are you gonna do now pv?

well he cant leave confused smilk alone here, and itd honestly be best the other beasts and dark enchantress dont drag him back there in this state, so he offers a hand.

"Come with me. We can help you, I'll make sure you're okay."

a memory-less smilk is confused by this but... he's already grabbing the other cookie's hand before he realizes it. It'll probably be fine, something about this cookie... makes something in him feel okay.

taps forehead, im still working everything out of course, and i WILL be cursing all of you with sketchy stuff about it when I'm able, i need more time to figure out smilk's behaviors without the soul jam and corruption

of course I'm always of the mind that pre-corruption smilk was kind of a rat and rude but how exactly is the real question!! how bad was it before the corruption exacerbated the negative qualities of knowledge and his personality

anyways,,, feel free to ask questions!! it could help me figure this all out, if yall are interested of course,,,,,,,my,,,, handful of crk followers SNRRKS

[saturdaysky]

we'll be alright, love. we'll make it through, you'll see.

just a doodle of my gnome tav, mayhew, and gale sometime in the long, dark night of the soul that is act 2

line version:

used a photo ref for the general pose. refs are amazing ✌

[cairsns]

Regulus who brews Amortentia repeatedly the year before he died because that was the only way for him to smell James

[isabel-lillah]

10 things only James Potter knew about Regulus Black

1) In July 1976, he came to the Potters through their floo together with unconscious Sirius. He left again before Effie and Monty came.

2) After his brother got away from home, he continued to secretly check on him.

3) He threatened Snape into not spreading the information about Remus being a werewolf.

4) He hexed another Slytherin for insulting Pandora.

5) He got punished for it by his mother. That was the second time he came through the Potters's floo.

6) He spent most of his nights at Hogwarts in the astronomy tower.

7) Regulus had violent nightmares that left him shaking. Sometimes, the shakes didn't stop for hours.

8) His touch was like the ocean - engulfing, gentle, but also powerful.

9) Before he left for the cave, he obliviated James in his sleep.

10) The obliviate didn't work.

[reine-de-la-lune]

Regulus: when I get married, will you walk me down the aisle?

Sirius: *holding back tears* yes

[that-bitch-kat3]

regulus: why did you take him away from me?

james: take him away? regulus he would’ve died in that house. you know that.

regulus: no he wouldn’t have, i was trying to protect him! i would’ve protected him-

james: i couldn’t let him get any more hurt. he’s my brother, when he gets hurt i have to be there-

regulus: he was my brother first.

[tnott]

[18 December 1993]

“So,��� Theo’s father said, “what would you like to do for your birthday next week?”

He had picked her up from the Hogwarts Express earlier that day, and now the two of them were sitting across from each other at the small table in the kitchen, partway through a meal of fried cod and spiced red lentils. Normally Theo would have been enjoying the food — it was one of her favorite dishes — but she hadn’t had much of an appetite lately, and so far she’d only managed to swallow a few mouthfuls.

She answered her father’s question with a shrug, pushing the lentils around her plate with her fork. She’d be turning fourteen on the coming Wednesday, but she hadn’t given the occasion much thought; she’d spent the past few weeks simply focusing on the fact that she would soon be home, home with her dad and her dog, and away from those horrible Dementors. Just riding past them in the thestral-drawn carriage had nearly made her sick, and she’d felt clammy and chilled for the entire train ride back to London.

“We could go to a museum,” her father suggested. “Or a concert, perhaps. A trip to the city would be nice, wouldn’t it?”

She shrugged again. “I don’t know,” she said. “I’ll think about it.”

With her attention fixed on her plate, she couldn’t see the look in Leontius Nott’s eyes as he gazed at his daughter — weighing, assessing, and more than a little worried.

“You’re not eating,” he said gently. “Are you feeling well, Theo?”

Once more, she shrugged. “I’m not really hungry,” she said. “I think I’ll go to bed early.” She didn’t wait for permission, but got to her feet, pushed in her chair, and placed her half-full plate on the counter beside the sink. Nell, the house elf, would take care of it. Then she kissed her father on the cheek.

“Goodnight, Dad,” she said.

He squeezed her around the shoulders and said, “I’ll come tuck you in once you’ve changed, all right, my girl?”

She nodded, once more missing the look of concern on her father’s lined face, and then left the kitchen. Hal padded along behind her, his collar jingling as they climbed the stairs; the dog followed her nearly everywhere when she was home, keeping her company as she read or played, and spending his nights sleeping at the foot of her bed.

When she reached her room, she closed the door behind her and sank onto the mattress, staring up at the familiar blue ceiling with its smattering of silver stars. She didn’t change right away, but simply lay there, feeling too listless to move. She’d thought she would be all right here, safe at home, far from the looming Dementors and the dark castle and her beastly classmates. She’d expected the leaden weight that had settled in her chest to fall away when she finally saw her father. But it hadn’t. She felt no less hollow or tired or cold than she had yesterday, or the day before, or the day before that.

Part of her wanted to tell her father, but something held her back. Not fear, precisely; she knew Dad would never be upset with her. But she didn’t want to disappoint him. She didn’t want him to think that she was weak, that she couldn’t cope with a simple Dementor. No one else at school seemed to be affected by them the way she was, except perhaps Potter. But then, Potter was always having funny turns. The Dark Lord’s curse had addled his brains, or so Mr. Malfoy had once said.

Still, even Potter’s fainting spells occurred only when he was physically near the Dementors. Theo didn’t have to be near them; their chill seemed to follow her throughout the castle like some miasma of despair, leaving her breathless and sleepless, empty and cold. Even here, safe in her bedroom with Hal beside her, it was hard for her to feel anything but a bone-deep sense of exhaustion.

Eventually she roused herself, fetching her flannel pajamas from beneath her pillow and changing into them. Not long after that, there was a knock on her door, and her father called, “Theo, are you decent?”

“Yes,” she said, sliding off the bed and walking across the carpet to the door. Her father entered, still dressed from dinner, and for a brief moment it struck Theo how old he was — grey and stooped, his round face wrinkled and his knuckles swollen with arthritis. He was old, and someday he would die. He would die, and he would go in the ground with her mother, and then Theo would be alone.

Abruptly, she burst into tears.

“My girl,” she heard her father say, “my girl, what’s wrong?” But she simply shook her head and fell into his arms, crying harder than she’d cried in ages.

She didn’t know how long they stood there, her father holding her tightly as she sobbed into the folds of his robe, Hal padding over to sit beside her, grounding her with his warm weight as he leaned against her leg. It was only when her tears had receded to hiccoughs that her father spoke again.

“Come here,” he said, guiding her out into the hall. “Come with me.” He led her to his own room, Hal following, and shepherded her onto the loveseat in the corner. Then he pulled out one of her mother’s knitted afghans and wrapped it around her before sitting down beside her.

“Can you tell me what’s wrong?” he asked softly.

That set off another flood of tears, and it was some time before Theo calmed down enough to speak. “I don’t feel right,” she managed to choke out, wiping her streaming eyes on the corner of the afghan. “I don’t— I don’t—”

She dissolved once more into sobs. Between gasped breaths, she told her father everything — about the Dementors, about that horrible boggart, about her falling grades, her sleepless nights and, most of all, about the hollow, echoing despair that seemed to have settled into her very bones.

“I’m so tired,” she hiccuped, once her torrential confession had subsided, “always, all the time, but I can never sleep — I don’t even know when I last slept. If I could just freeze the world somehow and really sleep for a few months—”

“Shh,” her father said, holding her close. “It’s all right, Theo.” He brushed a strand of hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear. “You’re having a melancholy fit. I had hoped you would escape them, since they passed over me, but I’m afraid they do run in the family.”

”Is there a way to make it stop?” she asked, sniffling a little.

”There’s no cure,” he said, and his blue eyes were sad as he looked at her. “But there is a special tea that I can teach you to make. I’m afraid it’s not like Pepper-Up; you won’t feel better right away. But if you drink it every morning, it will help.”

A wave of relief seemed to be washing over Theo, and she leaned sideways to rest her head against her father’s shoulder. He knew. He knew what this was, and he knew how to fix it, and he didn’t seem disappointed in her at all. He just seemed concerned.

”I think, right now, we should start by getting you a good night’s rest,” he said. “I’ll give you a sleeping draught, and we can tackle the bigger problems in the morning.”

She nodded and then asked, softly, “Can I stay here tonight?” She would feel safer with her father near than she would alone in her own room.

“Of course.” With a wave of his wand, her father conjured up a pillow and placed it in Theo’s lap. As he went to fetch the sleeping draught, Theo settled herself on the cushions, burrowing under the afghan and then whistling Hal up beside her. The dog bounded onto the loveseat, his golden tail wagging, and curled up by her feet.

”Here you are,” her father said a moment later, returning with a glass of purple potion.

Obediently, Theo drank the lot before laying her head down on the pillow and closing her eyes.

”Sleep,” she heard her father say, just before she drifted into slumber. “Hal’s here. I’m here. We’ll take care of you.”

[hotteststar]

okay so I found this and DARE I SAY ROSEKILLER????

like cmonn its just so themmmmm arghhh

[ezkel]

jegulus soulmate au but you only both get your marks when you're both aware of your own feelings

James has known he's in love with regulus for years, he knows they're not soulmates and that he'd never have a chance with regulus. when Regulus became a deatheater he'd cry wondering why he was still in love with him, wishing he could carve his heart out so he wouldn't feel this way towards someone that would kill him without hesitation.

regulus only realizes he's in love with James as the inferi drag him into the water, thinking back on his life. remembering the annoying man that brought the sun into his life when everything was always so cold. the last thing he sees is "James Fleamont Potter" burning into the skin on his arm.

James wakes up feeling his arm burn, confused he looks and sees the beautiful calligraphy written into the name "Regulus Arcturus Black" at first he's overjoyed, does this mean regulus is going to leave the death eaters, maybe be a spy for the order.

a few days later he reads the announcement of Regulus' death in the news and everything inside him breaks.

[noirsnonsense]

what IFFFF instead of sirius leaving regulus, regulus BEGGED sirius to get out. sirius was dying and he refused to die without his brother near him so he tried to refuse when regulus told him to go but then regulus pretended to turn on sirius. "I hate you" type shit so sirius left. really angsty shit ya know. CANON OR NOT WHO GIVES A FUCK NOTHING FROM THE MARAUDERS IS CANON I JUST THOUGHT THATS BE A COOL IDEA FOR EXTRA ANGST IN A FIC.

[whore-of-hogwarts06]

Regulus confessing to James, but James doesn’t know he’s trans:

Regulus: Why not?

James: *sighs* I wish you were a girl.

Regulus: Oh.