#why don’t you understand my decision?
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Thinking about the decisions made by Tim and by Dick at the end of Battle for the Cowl again, and I just realised this is one of the few moments when Dick and Tim’s instinctual reaction to a situation flips and they take the route the other usually chooses.
Because Dick’s maxim since 1980 or so has been that, when situations get bad, you can walk away and leave. Your problems can be left behind. People will cope without you. When things get personally stressful, Dick generally leaves. (Leaving Bruce to become Nightwing after the you’re fired/I quit conversation, walking away from the Titans after his relationship and wedding fell apart with Kory, going to Bludhaven to establish his own separate identity after reuniting with Bruce, wandering in a daze after Blockbuster dies and then running off to join the mob, the manner in which the Dick/Babs breakup(s) are structured, needing the World Trip Cruise after Bludhaven is bombed, etc)
While Tim’s choice in bad situations has generally been to cling, to stay and hold things (hold people) together, because if he doesn’t take on the role, who will. Tim worries that without someone stepping up, things will fall apart. (‘Batman needs a Robin’, staying during Knightfall and Knightquest, coming to No Man’s Land to pull the city back together, returning to Bruce even after his 16th Birthday, returning to Robin during War Games, even going to Bludhaven after War Games is holding Bludhaven together for Dick while he’s not able to do so, to go on the World Trip Cruise to keep an eye on Bruce and Dick, to try and clone people/resurrect people because he’s clinging to their memories).
But then we hit the start of Batman Reborn. And Dick makes the decision to stay, to hold Gotham together, to hold Damian together, a decision that usually you would see Tim make.
And Tim chooses to leave, to believe that Dick and Gotham can cope without him, while he prioritises something else (the search for Bruce).
As characters, Dick and Tim have been arguing over this point for 34 years now, and it’s fascinating to see that on one of the big occasions when the decision flipped, they both ended up on the opposite side to usual.
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The assumptions people are making on Veilguard bc ALL decisions won’t carry over are insane to me “OH so morrigan won’t mention her ONLY SON!! or her roMANCE??”. We have no idea what context or capacity she’s going to be in the game? In skyhold, she stayed at skyhold for a while, so it made sense to chat her up and ask about her life. Also Kieran was THERE bc he was TEN. Kieran is now in his twenties and most likely living his own life. If we’re saving the world and fighting darkspawn WHY would her grown ass son come up? Esp when she doesn’t even know Rook?? Like i would understand if we had veilguard in our hands and people were complaining bc Morrigan actually had dialogue invalidating their canon but for fuck’s sake the game isn’t even out yet. They’re saying it doesn’t matter as in it’s not gonna come up bc Rook is busy doing other shit, rather than quizzing characters who aren’t companions on their lives. “What about Varric”. Varric seems to have a pre-established relationship with Rook which means you can headcanon that they already had the talk about Varric’s life story considering he called them his “second in command”. Like cancel your preorders, preorder, do whatever you want no one on the internet is the boss of you. But oh my fucking god complaining about something you don’t even fully know about is already getting so old. Best case scenario, you’re right and i guess your bitching is validated yay for you ig. Worst case, you’re wrong and like wasted so much time and energy bitching for nothing. Like I completely understand being upset the choices don’t carry over, it IS disappointing! But we don’t even KNOW what it’s going to affect if anything at all. It’s just so funny how everyone was like “it’s not about the Inquisitor” and now that the focus is confirmed to be pretty much entirely on Rook and the inquistor’s choices barely seem to matter in game and half of everybody has lost the plot bc of it and we don’t even actually know how this will affect the game like ????
#i understand being mad#and you can do whatever you want about it#but holy shit is getting so annoying to hear about#i’m not even touching the solas stuff#i understand being upset that solas is a focal point if you don’t care for him#but it’s just ridiculous reiterating why he’s important to the storyline#lyriumsings txt#dragon age#discourse#i guess#i’m just ranting bc i’m so bored of hearing about this#everyone just keeps going more and more over the top with like what isn’t going to be referenced#like correct me if i’m wrong but all cameos from da2 and dao in inquisitor were either delivered thru dialogue#or delivered thru fucking letters#so like REALLy what’s missing with that??#and then yall COMPLAINED about that too!!???#‘hawke is ooc#‘my warden is ooc’#like i’m not surprised they shafted warden and hawke mentions and all prev decisions#no matter what they do yall harass these people as if they’re your personal punching bag for every gripe you have with dragon age#spoilers#anyway lemme focus on my movie im watching with my sister lmao
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I feel the need to remind people,
There is nobody Jesus is unable to save
I feel it comes up far too often that I am researching a mental illness or behavior or types of people that people will comment how such people will never be saved, never come to Christ
And I honestly think this is an evil thing to say, let alone publicly, let alone where a record of it is kept for all to see for however long the website is running
Do you have any idea where people who are struggling with all manner of things and looking for help are going to end up? On those exact pages. Do you know where they might look for more information when the article/video/etc waxes on about how rare it is for these people to change or find help? Right in the comments.
How dare the people who post this stuff. To take away the only real hope for the lost. To say ‘this is where everyone can find peace for their soul except for you.’ ‘only those good enough can be Saved’
I have seen people mention being in absolute despair because there’s no help for them even though they want to change. There’s no need to make this even harder.
No sin, no mental illness, no habit, no personality type, no mistake, no past is going to prevent people who put their faith in Jesus’s death and resurrection from being Saved, so stop trying to turn them away and discourage them.
#Vio's Personal#Now obviously I don’t assume any of my followers have done this#I just find it infuriating#I should do more about it probab;y#I still remember Years ago when I was looking for help about why reading the bible was something I never wanted to do#(I honestly still struggle about it A Lot but at least I better understand why now)#and someone had mentioned that people who don’t want to read the bible probably aren’t saved#utterly soul crushing#It didn’t impact my decisions or any such but#some comment on there for years and years that they forgot about#And just devastating for no reason#And that’s nothing compared to what people say about some mental illnesses#What value was there in saying that? Would it be worth it if even one person was dissuaded from pursuing the Truth from it?#The things you say can impact people. Act like it
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resident evil cowboy au??? resident evil cowboy au!
or maybe more like ‘western au’ but whatever. someone mentioned the words ‘cowboy au’ within my circle and that was all it took, i was gone on another extreme au adventure. have brainrot, will travel.
bonus initial concept sketch below — leon is older in it than in the comic and has graduated to dual pistols. chris remains grizzled.
#my fanart#resident evil#leon kennedy#leon s kennedy#chris redfield#cowboy au#western au#yeah in this au chris got grizzled in his 20s and then just stayed that way#look if he’s not going to be grizzled in a western au what’s even the point#his jacket just got more holes#i don’t know why i decided i had to be the one to do this when i don’t understand what hats look like#and this is the era of literally everyone wearing hats 100% of the time#i’m sorry for all the period inaccuracies#i don’t know what i’m doing#i played rdr2 for like 5 hours and got to the point where the world opened up#then i got decision paralysis and quit#those are my qualifications#i will refrain from using the relationship tag since it ain’t shippy#but… you know#okay i must return now to the bog whence i came#fan comic
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With the heavy caveat that I know people put their heart and soul into this show, having watched 6 seasons of this shit now, The Dragon Prince is just this to me
I root for this show as if it was my child’s little league team playing against the Dodgers. Like, they have the spirit, certainly. Can they actually hit a fastball going over 100mph? I think not.
#ok tag rant kiddos get ready#tdp in the beginning was cute- competent- passable kids media that was genuinely entertaining if silly to watch#like yall it was endearing at first but now— i don’t think they know WHY things worked in avatar#and don’t get me wrong#it has SO much potential#i WANT it to be good#it THREATENS WITH A GUN to be good#and then it trips on itself#which is so sad because all the pieces are there- then they make the most BAFFLING plot/character decisions#i pity the crew making it because 1) bts coming outta there kinda sounds like hell#and 2) making the netflix-style release schedule show is so deeply challenging and detrimental to its shows#idk i’ll rant more coherently later but damn#i hate to see so much passion squandered or lessened by just a top-down lack of ability to organize and execute#am i 24 and watching this? yeah. but not as a mere fan: im peer reviewing#this is such a late 2010’s-2020’s show like damn#there’s just too much going on#but god dammit if there aren’t so many talented people OBVIOUSLY pouring their all into it#some of whom I’ve followed for a while!#i just wish the show had the chance to live up to its potential#and didnt parrot avatar’s flirtation with darker themes in children’s media without understanding why it worked or what lines you cant cross#also rayla and callum are like… kinda gross imo. but that’s just me I guess#this is my new game of thrones if they wanna name an episode where no one dies ‘the red wedding’
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I hate that 10+ years have passed since Inquisition, it truly doesn’t make any sense to me..
You could tell me it took solas a month to prepare for his ritual and nothing would change.. This is because we have never been in tevinter, we don’t know how much the place has changed in 10 years! If the game took place in ferelden we would definitely the passage of time! So to me, the time skip has no impact other than making characters be older…
#I’m not saying I wanted the game to take place in ferelden#I just don’t understand why it had to be 10 years#idk I’m mainly upset about it because of what it will mean to my warden#I just want her to be alive!#I hate the time skip so much#also if the who gets left in the fade decision is not present in the game#when will it be adressed? in another ten years??#whoever’s there has been there for 10+ years and you won’t address it???#dragon age: the veilguard#da4#dragon age
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you know what? fuck you *takes on your me*
#this is literally nothing#except that i finished the magicians season 4 and this song is now stuck in my head and all of me is pain :)#i don’t understand why they chose to do this. actually i’m not that bothered about That Thing They Did though i know it sort of imploded#the whole fandom (maybe it’s just because i knew about it way ahead of time going in so i was prepared? anyway it’s like. yeah i would#probably have handled the build-up a little differently but it’s not like i feel personally betrayed by the decision that was made etc.)#(like i’m sad about it. but. i don’t think it Ruins The Show Beyond Repair or anything there are other elements that are compelling to me)#no i’m literally just referring to the extremely tragic rendition of take on me lmao you didn’t have to ruin that song quite so thoroughly#by association for me forever :/#caseyposting
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Not crying and being guilt ridden again :))))))
#tgdposts#personal#when I can’t articulate to people around me so it results in my mind confronting me#(confronting is a strong word here but I digress)#about me struggling to make any decision regarding my future#and on a lesser note being guilt ridden when I’m unable to meet with people because I’m trying to be productive but then I’m unable to be#productive and oh why weren’t we able to meet up but if I share it it just seems like I was being fucking lazy and fuck I hate this#and fuck it’s hard to talk to my dad like he’s a nice guy but I know he doesn’t really understand and sometimes it’s just hard to explain#things with the weight they have in my heart you know?#it’s so hard to explain that I’m not just procrastinating or being a jobless useless bum I don’t even know how to bring that up#and even if doc gives me ideas things to help me those are still things I need to implement myself and that too is hard to initiate#and talking about all of it just makes me feel like a guilty useless shithead#and I know it’s not true but that doesn’t make me feel it any less#from the outside of my brain it just seems like I’m making up my own problems#how do you even talk about that#anyway#I’m going to bed now I’m tired#if you read this I appreciate you for listening to me#you guys are great#<3#mental illness#I guess might as well tag it as this#rant#vent#vent post#summer is lowkey my worst season mentally lowkey which is kind of sad if you think about it
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would it be sacrilege of me to say that i am kinda hashtag Underwhelmed by the percy jackson show
#first off. the directing is just not that good.#like you could have taken the unique story and made interesting choices that make the story feel more exciting but so far it’s just so basi#basic shot composition basic camera movement fairly basic lighting#also like i can understand changes from the book. going from a first person novel to a show is difficult and you have to make changes.#but also some of them are just like nonsensical. why would you change the claiming from a moment of victory for percy to whatever that was#<- well okay not really victory. more confusion and fear and desperation with a tad bit of victory#(also the claiming symbol looked bad and i’m salty about that)#i liked that annabeth had it figured out though that was fun. the introduction to her character kinda slayed#oh my god also the decision for that scene where luke is telling percy abt him annabeth and thalia to Not have any broll type shots overtop#-of the explaination actually Showing what luke was saying was lame#i get that they don’t have the actor for thalia chosen yet but you could have easily done it to where you only showed young luke+annabeth-#-and just thalia’s like sillohuette or hand reaching out or whatever#also again about the claiming scene they just took away all of the hints toward future twists. the hellhound summoned by someone in camp-#-and the hints toward the Big prophecy :(#anyway overall it’s awesome and it’s so fun to see pjo on screen. it’s just a bit lacking imo ☹️#oh and the reduction of gabe into an almost comedic character rather than as an absolutely foul person that percy and sally have had to-#-suffer just does not work for me. it’s such an important detail thematically and also gives so much more context and meaning to percy and-#-sally’s lives and relationship. i think it’s so important but they changed it to something more palletable :(#ash rambles#ash.txt
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The worst part of mania for me is that I get so restless and don’t know what to do with it when I do t have a task or I can’t listen to music that I get so viscerally angry. And then people can tell and ask me about it and that pisses me off more and I just feel like if I could make like lightning strike whenever I’m angry that would be really helpful bc if ppl are scared I’ll explode them they’ll leave me the fuck alone.
#like yes. I understand I technically made the decision to go to dinner and not to boxing. but it was only bc I didn’t feel good already!!!#also. over the course of like less than 2 hours I got asked what was wrong upwards of ten times by 3 people.#you have all heard my answer!! I don’t feel good !!! why are we asking so many times!!!#anyway I need a beer.#prsnl
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ngl that dazai anon™ reminds a little of myself when i was hyperfixated on a specific character and would go on to guilt trip every single fic writer who dared to kill her
but like... i was 10
Oh I relate to this so hard in the sense that dazai anon reminds me of my pre-teen self— when I was like 12 I went through a phase of hating on an actor who played a character I didn’t like (the actor did a perfectly fine job of portraying the character, my 12 year old brain just couldn’t differentiate between an actor who’s really good at playing an asshole and an Actual Real Life asshole).
Luckily I never harassed anyone over it, and once I outgrew that phase I was like “That was so stupid.”
anyway that’s why I keep saying I really hope the Dazai anon just outgrows this phase naturally. I think the fact that this is all taking place on the internet instead of in some private group chat between Dazai anon and their friends is making this so much worse, because it’s creating this cycle where they have to keep doubling down and the internet will never let them forget about this and outgrow it in a healthy way.
point is the internet is the REAL problem here.
#Also I sympathize a little with the feeling of an entire fandom portraying your blorbo in a way that you personally don’t vibe with#HOWEVER many many people (especially in the bsd fandom in particular) have dealt with this exact same thing#in much healthier ways#I get the feeling of “what have none of you read/watched the source material??”#“Where are you getting your characters from because these are NOT my guys from [media]”#Actually the culture shock/whiplash from watching the bsd anime with no knowledge of the fanbase and then seeing the tumblr fandom…#It was like discovering a whole different media than the one I had just watched#you don’t get it I’m secretly very ship-blind.#When I saw people shipping skk I genuinely did not understand where the idea to ship them spawned from#I was completely neutral on the ship I was just baffled by it#Like. I get it now.#But at the time I was like “why’s everyone so into these two characters specifically? Doesn’t the redhead have like 3 lines total?”#Also the fandom’s unanimous decision that Mori’s just going around torturing and abusing people#At the time I didn’t know Yosano’s backstory but regardless I was like “where is this coming from did I skip an episode or something”
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so much of who i am at this moment in my life revolves around grief and the loss of my dad. not in a “i’m sad all the time” way because that isn’t what grief is. i just am always thinking about grief in some way. my perspective on life is colored by my grief! it’s always there. it’s been there for four years now.
and i am not happy izzy died. that will never be true. just like i will never be happy my dad is dead. i love my dad and boy do i love izzy hands especially this season. but i am feeling this grief and these feelings and this LOVE and it is so familiar but it isn’t all bad. because we got closure. we got a fucking incredible izzy arc. it’s devastating. but like, it’s supposed to be. if i didn’t love this character so much i wouldn’t feel this way. if this show and this character weren’t well written i wouldn’t feel like i’m microdosing on grief! but i do and i love having characters and stories that help me process my grief and feel my feelings!
someone else pointed out that it is such a sad way to look at life thinking “why go through all that growth if he’s just going to die.” everyone dies! people you love will die. you will die. everyone still deserves to grow and be loved anyway.
i am sad. i am crying about it! but i just feel so much love? like the way they did it didn’t feel cheap. i didn’t feel like i was being robbed. or like it was just bad writing. which i often feel like when it comes to character deaths. but this time it really felt full of love for izzy and the journey he went on. and for ed, for that matter. and i feel very emotionally connected to it all.
all of that being said the one (1) thing i didn’t like at all about s2e8 is izzy saying “you’re surrounded by family” and then stede and ed leaving the crew immediately after. feeling very “wtf is that” but i know why they gave us that ending just in case and i do really appreciate the writers for that.
#anyway if anyone ever wants to talk about grief or ask about grief or any of it i love talking about it#i think it’s so important to talk about#and i do not want to bitch about the ending because it was so fucking cute but at the same time#ed and stede leaving or retiring or whatever we are calling it right now made me feel weird#like i know it wasn’t but it felt a bit like a ‘unfounds your family’ mom’s t#*moment#and i hate when my family gets unfounded#like if you’re going to kill a character in an admittedly beautifully and amazingly handled way#you have to at least let my guys keep their whole support system together#i guess is how i’m looking at it#but again i COMPLETELY understand why the decisions that were made were made!! and i appreciate them#because you don’t always get shows to be handled with care like that!!!#ofmd#ofmd s2#ofmd spoilers#ofmd s2 spoilers#izzy hands#death cw#death tw
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I love the poyt series BUT PLS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD KILL STEVE OR ANYTHNG LIKE I SERIOUSLY HATE HIM. AND NO AMOUNT OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT CAN SAVE HIM. LIKE I WAS SEETHING IN THE LAST CHAPTER OF HOW QUICKLY WE JUST FORGIVE HIM??? LIKE TF it's always like this i'm sick of reading stories where the man lead does shitty things and the female forgives him for the bare minimum. PLS MAKE YOUR EXCELLENT FIC DIFF THAN OTHERS AND MAKE THAT MAN MISERABLE AND GIVE US A HAPPY ENDING NOT WITH HIM!! Thanks!
Your opinion is completely valid and I’m glad your so invested in the fic but please do trust me!
#this kiiiinda is rubbing me the wrong way 😅😅#she’s forgiven him bc she’s innately kind#also she does say she WANTS to hate him for all he’s done to her but she just can’t#Steve still have a LONG way to go as well#apologising means he recognised the problem#it’s what he does from here on out which counts#just trust where I take this story#and if you don’t agree with it or find it believable then that’s okay#the hardest part to write is Steve’s developments#and I don’t claim to be an amazing writer so maybe it IS hard to believe#but still I ask you to trust me and leave your judgements till the end of the fic#also I feel like most dark fics end with the reader escaping the bad guy main character#although I’m not giving away the ending of poyt bc I want it to be a surprise#but yeah… I’m not trying to be like other fics OR be deliberately different from other fics#I’m just writing the story that is coming from my heart and soul#i know that sounds cheesy but that’s how it feels 😅😅😅#and whatever happens… if you don’t agree with it then that’s valid but I’ll stand by whatever decision I make#GOD WHY DID I MAKE IT SOUND SO MUCH DEEPER THAN IT IS#idek!!! this kinda made me sad/mad but not really bc I understand where you’re coming from???#but please respectfully don’t tell a writer how to write their fic 😌😌😌#anon#poyt ask
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#I wonder if the people who are about to allow the bill through its first reading are sleeping soundly. I wonder what they’ll#eat for breakfast. how do they go about getting dressed? do they stare into their sock drawer and feel a terrifying dread about the bill?#are they as afraid of it failing as I am afraid of it passing?#do they at least think they’re doing the right thing? do they think they’re acting for the greater good?#is it just malice in their heart? anger?#do you think they’ll let it through because of adamant passion? do you think they don’t really care and they’re just doing what#they think their friends would like?#will they shrug at any outcome? would they celebrate with friends and handshakes and toasts? if it fails do you think they’ll go home and#weep at the lack of control they have over their world? will they wonder if they should move somewhere more tolerant of their transphobia?#do you think they have a specific trans person in mind as they let the bill through?#are they remembering a specific person? are they thinking ‘this bill needs to pass so my kids don’t end up like that’?#I wonder if they’ve ever been a customer in my store. I wonder if I helped them. I wonder if they took a look at me and#decided ‘I cannot allow this kind of sin to exist.’ what if I motivated them with my upsetting little existence?#I’ve seen so many old men in expensive suits. I’ve embarrassed them by carrying their things to their car because they didn’t realize a GIRL#would show up to do it. how many times have I heard ‘oh YOURE carrying it? I was expending a strapping young man!’#maybe they just saw me for a moment and thought ‘oh god what an ugly dyke. this is why transgendering should be banned.’?#I don’t understand why they get to make decisions like this for me. It isn’t even a vote. they’ll go to work and do their job: determine#whether I am allowed to exist or not. I’ll go to work and do my job: be a cashier and be nothing else.#they have the power to determine my entire life. I couldn’t even refuse to help them if they came to my job.#maybe they’ll even stop by after work and check out at my register and they’ll be polite for the sake of convenience and I’ll be polite too#and they’ll leave and think ‘thank goodness people#like that won’t be allowed to change their bodies anymore. I hope she’s able to be normal and make a good wife for someone and stop this.’#sorenhoots
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my mum is coming to visit tomorrow and i’m going to talk to her about getting a wheelchair. or. well. i’m going to tell her i’m getting a wheelchair tbh. it’s not a question of if i can anymore. this’ll be more about if she’ll support me or now
#last time over the phone I got a ‘i’m worried no one will want to be friends with you because they’ll think you’re fragile’#which. we don’t have time to unpack all of that#i did talk about it to my therapist and i agree that she’s pushing her anxieties onto me#but i’d like her to understand why i’m going through this process and why it’s the best decision
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fuck plato’s closet fr bc how are you gonna have all this shein for sale but when i come in trying to sell a huge bag full of the exact brands and styles you claim to be looking for you take 12 things and give me $49 for all of it…
#like everyone’s told me they’re picky but not THIS picky like truly how are they making these decisions#when i was looking around i saw a pair of the exact same sweatpants i brought in but in an uglier color and they didn’t buy mine#and i couldn’t tell which stuff they took cause it was all in a bin but the one thing i did see on top was a sweater from urban#i paid like $80 for it originally and they gave me 4 FUCKING DOLLARS#i know it’s a thrift store and they’re not gonna pay a ton and i probably wouldn’t care if they had taken more stuff but they didn’t so#also i had everything folded so nicely when i brought it in and the girl who went through it literally just threw it all back in the bag#like can you at the very least keep it neat if you’re not gonna take it UGH i’m in such a bad mood now#spent literally all day sorting through my clothes drove 30 minutes to the store and waited there for 45 minutes just for that#i’m gonna try going to another location tomorrow bc i simply don’t understand why they didn’t take some of this stuff#vent#lj.txt
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