#wholesome fic

[kapapi-o]

Treasure (nonbinReader x Gojo)

Des: (this takes place around the time Geto and Gojo are still in High School, reader is also their classmate)—So reader is a softie for only Gojo. The man catches on and instantly, he’s down bad lmao. 

-A bit ooc but he gets a little jealous and possessive so are we rlly upset abt it???

Apx. 1.05k words

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Girls want to be with him, guys too, (well most want to be like him). He’s just the pinnacle of sorcerer excellence in the Jujutsu world. Ordained at birth for greatness and effortlessly powerful, Gojo Satoru truly was at the top of the world.

Then there you were, a bright eyed classmate, no doubt admiring him like the rest of them from a distance. He noticed you past the crowds and thought to be charitable by coming up to you, waiting to see your thrilled reaction to him coming your way.

But in much contrast to what he’s used to, and to his greater curiosity, you all but smiled. Greeting him politely with, “Hello Gojo.”

 You were clearly delighted to see him but it felt different, somehow…and oddly enough, he was speechless. He quickly uttered out a reply and trailed around campus with you for a bit. You both get to talking about mundane things (as mundane as they can be with the subject being with Gojo), and he’s come to get a good picture of you.

Sure, you admire him but not at all for the reasons he anticipated. Not for the power, wealth, status, fame, achievements…it almost drove him mad as he questioned the cause for that little twinkle in your eye, and not to mention that oh so softness that you always addressed him with.

During empty periods outside of class, he’d go look for you. Bored and wanting something or someone to add a little kick into the routine he was sickly getting used to. Sat alone on a bench, your legs laced on the pavement of the roof, the fence in your view while you listened to music on the bench. Admiring how the coming winds blew the scenery before you, refreshing your dazed brain from those stuffy classes. 

Gojo smirks and leans next to your ear, tapping on your shoulder and startling you when you turn to see his face so suddenly close to yours. You jolt back, your headphones nearly falling off your shoulders as you scold him about scaring you like that again.

The man grins then laughs, taking a seat at your side to inquire about your whereabouts. You amuse him and answer all of his questions, normal and nonsensical ones.

Until finally, he lands on the one thing that he’s been wondering every time he sets his sights on you.

“Why do you do that?

“Hm? Do what?” You tilt your head, confused as to what he could be referring to. He sighs and leans into the backrest of the bench, rethinking his words.

“You know, that thing—where you’re just..all soft on me. I don’t really see you doing that with anybody else, so why me?”

He asks, leaning on the palm of his hand to peek at you through his shades, his blue eyes piercing you ever so slightly. You’re flustered at the spot, caught red handed by your special treatment for him. You take a moment to  mull over it, trying to figure out the reason for your subconscious demeanor towards him.

“I think it’s because..” you pondered, following your train of thought, “you seem like this larger-than-life kinda guy. You look like you’re having fun too, but at the same time, it’s like you’re all by yourself. I just thought that maybe…you needed to be treated with extra care..or something.” You chuckled sheepishly, embarrassed at your wording.

“I don’t know, does that sound weird?” 

Gojo stares stunned at you. In awe, he can only manage to say, “No, not at all.”

��� It feels nice, actually.”

Perhaps this empty feeling is something more than just boredom. When his adoring fans are gone, and he and his best friend separate for the day, there’s only him in between. There’s always been that saying of how lonely it gets at the top. Is that why you cared so much? Bother to amuse him and his antics, never swooning too easily to his teasing, always somehow prepared when he forgot or needed something, it’s you. You were always there…holding out a gentle hand to him without asking for anything.

And when he looks at you for why, you just laugh. Walking in front of him like what you do is nothing much. But it means so much, —so much to him. 

Soon, he finds himself actively seeking you out when he can. Growing clingy and taking advantage of that soft spot you’ve got for him. He doesn’t realize how much he craves having your eyes on him until Geto comes around. Stopping in to say hi, and getting more acquainted with you, the person that has Gojo on his feet all day.

Geto flashes a wolfish smile your way, knowing it wouldn’t set him off but definitely make him bite the inside of his cheek. Pettiness was growing by the moments you spend laughing and chatting with his best friend rather than with him. Quite frankly, he was confused as to who to call a traitor, Geto for playing with him like this, himself for throwing his dignity out, or to you, for making him throw it. Ah, this was all your fault…this icky feeling filling him from the pit of his stomach.

In the middle of your conversation, he abruptly takes your wrist in his hand and drags you away from him. Turning around to throw a glare at Geto’s laughing form as you questioned him for his suddenness. 

“Gojo, what’s the matter? Why’d you drag me here?” You asked, eyeing him in worry and looking at the wrist that was held by him. Now how was he going to explain that he simply didn’t like how you were smiling at someone like Geto, someone arguably second to him in rank. The man could easily compete for your attention and if he’s not careful, win over that tender spot reserved in your heart. The spot that’s his. 

“Gojo?” You called repeatedly, tugging at his sleeve. Gods, he hadn’t realized how much he adored hearing his name fall from your lips.

Without warning, the man in front of you swiftly shoves a lollipop in your mouth. It’s your favorite Chupa flavor. You hummed contently and eyed him in wonder, 

“I just wanted to give you that. It’s for taking good care of me.” He pats your head, smiling to himself and dragging you alongside him in the setting sun, “Now, let’s walk you home.”

He assures himself that he’ll make you his one day. But before then, he needs to make sure that everyone knows that he treasures you as much as you treasure him.

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A/n: MERRY CHRYSLER EVERYONEEEE

Imma make this a mini series cuz I love writing my faves being down bad. It’s literally my favorite flavor of fic lmao

He might be ooc but it’s okay, we can be a bit delulu, right?

Have a good new year, ya’ll and take care<333

-Kapi<3

[1lostsoul0fishbowl]

A HELLCHEER PROPOSAL - Eddie and Chrissy, by @emeriart , commissioned for With a Little Help From My Friends, but the following excerpt is from a prior fic called Into the Shining Sun…

“I’m not trying to scare you,” Eddie blurts out, “I’m the one who’s scared. I want you to fly, sweetness, I don’t— I don’t want to tie you down. I want you to have everything you want. I don’t want you to be unhappy years from now because you realized you could’ve done so much better than me.”

She stops walking. Takes his chin firmly in her hand, turning him to face her. “Edward Wayne Munson, there is nobody in this world who’s better for me than you.”

He laughs, heart soaring, even as two big tears roll down his face. “Okay, so, what’s the word, then?”

She kisses the tears away. “What word?”

“You said all I have to do is say the word. What’s the word?”

“Oh… it’s more like a few words, I guess. Something like ‘Chrissy Cunningham, love of my life, will you marry me and be mine forever’ should do nicely.”

“I think I can manage that.” He glances around. “Come on.”

“Where are we going?”

“Well, I’m not gonna ask you to marry me and then give you my ugly skull ring, am I? We’re at the fair, I oughta try to win you a ring, or at least a teddy bear or something, right? Come on.”

“I like your skull ring.” She giggles as he tugs her hand. “I like all your rings.”

“Nope. Too ugly for a fantastically beautiful woman like you. Just come with me!”

“I’m coming, angel. Anywhere you wanna go, I’m coming with you.”

Hand in hand, laughing, they run down the midway together.

Shameless self-promotion: like what you read here? Into the Shining Sun (warning, this one is pretty angsty)

[arwenkenobi48]

King Richard tapped his foot with slight impatience. “Come on, John. We haven’t got all day.” Prince John gulped nervously. “Eh, ahem, uh, Sir Hiss?” Hiss’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Yesss?” Wringing his tail, the bedraggled lion took a deep breath and with a quick glance at his older brother, he turned back to his reptilian companion.

“Sir Hiss, I am…sorry for mistreating you.” Sir Hiss almost fell over in surprise. “Y-You are?” “Yes. It was unfair of me to treat you so badly when you only wanted to help me. I am so, so sorry.” Having got his rehearsed apology off his chest, Prince John gave a massive sigh of relief. It was the first time he’d apologised to anyone in his life.

Sir Hiss stared in blank amazement. He didn’t know what to think. But he could tell that the petulant prince meant what he said. “That’sss all right.” With these words and a friendly smile, he broke the silence and Prince John, who had been looking ashamedly down at his paws, finally managed to meet the serpent’s gaze. “Can you ever forgive me?” “Of coursssse I can. But no more thumpsss on the head when things go wrong, alright?”

For a split second, the old Prince John seemed to come back and he spluttered in frustration. “Now see here, I-“ “Ahem.” King Richard laid his paw heavily on his brother’s shoulder. John sighed again and managed to calm himself down. “Oh, very well.”

Upon hearing this, Sir Hiss slithered over and wrapped himself around Prince John in the snake equivalent of a hug. “Ssssir, I’m very proud of you.”

For many years, Prince John had felt like his stomach was tied in a knot, as if something just wasn’t right. He didn’t know how to describe it, but when his loyal companion said he was proud of him, that strange feeling seemed to melt away. As happy tears filled his golden eyes, he returned Hiss’s warm hug. King Richard watched, his heart melting. His little brother was capable of mending his ways, after all.

[afloofwithmultipleinterests]

HELLO? [[tickling department]]? IT'S FOR YOU!!

A sequel tickle fic to Cheater, Cheater! (Ler!Jevil, Lee!Spamton) With the player being away for who knows how long, Jevil and Spamton hang out in the void behind Seam's shop, attempting to entertain themselves best they can. However when messes are to be kept to a minimum, All hope of escaping boredom is lost... or is it? Lee!Jevil Ler!Spamton Lee!Spamton(?)

It was so much fun writing this fic series with @coy-lee! its been ages since i've stretched my fingers for some good old fashion fanfiction! Spam and Jev are so fun to write... Thanks for writing with me coy. writing with you and LF both make my world!

Anyhoo... On with the story!

📞🔊 ☎️🎵 📞🔊☎️🎶

HELLO?

[[tickling department]]?

IT'S FOR YOU!!

📞🔊 ☎️🎵 📞🔊 ☎️🎶

It was true that Jevil and Spamton had a silent truce to the whole battle thing, or as the clown would like to put it, his 'numbers game'. Alas, Spamton's mission to achieve the higher plane of existence had ultimately been foiled... the salesman found a new purpose he had never seen before in this prison. He had friends. Actual, PHYSICAL companions! 

It was after hours in the old cat-plush's shop. The player would be gone for an extended period of time, perhaps years from now, so the cat tended to doing business of his own behind closed doors regarding his two newest creations. Spamton was playing a card game with Jevil, although it appeared neither one knew what actual game they were playing. 

"GO-[[Frank's fish fry buffet!]]" 

"IVE GOT A FULL HOUSE, HOUSE!" 

The two said simultaneously while laying their cards down for their consecutive games. 

"I THOUGHT WE WERE PLAYING [[Gone fishing! Be back later]] NOT [[house!]] ... NOT [[hou-]]." Frustrated, Spamton's glasses went staticy for a moment. "nevermind.." As soon as the whisper came, the puppet glitched back into his normal salesman tone. "YOU GET THE [[photo noise]]." 

"YES, YES! I UNDERSTAND, UNDERSTAND!" Jevil nodded, impulsively bringing his gloved index and thumb to his chin. "BUT, ITS NOT VERY CHAOTIC TO STICK TO THE RULES! I LIKE A CHAOS, CHAOS, A MISCHIEF, MISCHIEF! ITS JUST NO FUN SPAM-SPAM!"

Sometimes Spamton just couldn't understand Jevil no matter how much he puzzled.

"ANYWAY! ITS NO FUN TO JUST PLAY CRAZY EIGHTS EVERY TIME, TIME! " Jevil exclaimed, throwing cards into the air haphazardly. Spamton flinched and gazed up at now the fluttering cards.

"CRAZY [[888-8888]]? IS THAT WHAT WE WERE PLA-" The doll spoke, cutting himself off when his eyes trailed down to find Jevil being surrounded by walls of cards stacking perfectly on top of each other. They continued to stack, building a tower around the jester, taller and taller as the cards multiplied out of nowhere. Construction noises sounded from inside the endlessly growing fortress, minimizing as it continued to grow. it wasn't long before the large card tower had stopped growing and had gone quiet. Then a cackling form burst from the top of the tower, looking down at his friend far below.

"HOW'S THE WEATHER DOWN THERE, THERE!?" Jevil called. Suddenly the cards caved from the top, the fool surfing down the wave of cards that soon crashed to the ground. He was now once again seated where he was before, cards falling like leaves all around them. Jevil bounced up and took a bow, thanking Spamton and the seemingly nonexistent audience for cheering him on. 

"You aren't making too much of a mess in there, are you Jevil?" a deep voice asked from the other room.

"WHAT!? WHY DO YOU ASSUME SUCH THINGS SEAM, SEAM!?" the jester called back, offended. Spamton couldn't help but laugh at Jevil's reaction to being called out. "UHG... GAMES ARE NO FUN WITHOUT A MESS, MESS," Jevil sighed, falling back onto the floor, staring into the void above.

Spamton thought a moment, scratching his head before his mind flashed back to about a week prior. If he could shift his face at all, a grinch-like smile would be there. Oh he knew EXACTLY the game that would be perfect for this occasion. His fingers were itching to wiggle and knead after that whole experience.

'GEEZ, I DUNNO HOW YOU CAN STAND IT, NO WAY I'D LAST!' Spamton recalled Jevil saying to him mid-attack. He'd test that statement himself, if not MORE teasy than Jevil. If he could figure out how the jester did it, that is! Although he was keen in the art of salesmanship, when it came to the art of tickling, Spamton didn't have sea legs like Jevil did. The puppet just hoped he could live up to the playful nature Jevil has come so naturally to him. However, he didn't mind taking a leap of faith on this… Spamton wanted to have fun! Besides, the clown had it coming to him anyway.

"ACTUALLY I THINK I KNOW A [[Book of games to play with your children!]] THATS NOT [[🎶i came in like a wrecking ball!🎶]]"

"OH *REALLY?* IS IT FUN ENOUGH TO SHARE WITH THE CLASS, CLASS?" Jevil perked up a bit, curious. He fell back again after a moment. "sigh BUT MESSY IS STILL MORE FUN…"

Spamton got up from his seat, which shortened him back to his regular height. Sliding back and forth across the ground as if he were floating, the doll clasped his hands together attempting to strike up a deal. Now THIS was in his ballpark.

"OH IM SURE THIS [[specil game]] WILL PEAK YOUR INTEREST MY [[friend request accepted]]!" Spamton advertised, growing a little closer to the jester through the ocean of cards.

"[[100% Entertainment!]] [[100%-]] F UN, FuN, FUN! [[for the whole family]]." The spam-bot finally stopped in front of the imp, that award losing smile offering the chance of a lifetime. "NO [[tough stains to get out]] NO [[pottery disrespected!]] ONLY- ONLY- ONLY-" Spamton was stuck on a record loop.

"ONLY WHAT, WHAT!? SPIT IT OUT MAN!" Jevil shouted, shaking the spambot's shoulders dramatically, his eyes wide, sparkling with excitement. Spamton legitimately had the jester entranced by this proposition. The best customer is a desperate one he supposed. Jevil was on the edge of his nonexistent seat now.

"I CAN SEE YOU'RE [[LOSING YOU R MIND]] OVER THIS [[once in a lifetime offer!]] YOU'RE LIKE ME! [[desperate.]]" Spamton started, his aura going from that of a salesman to... playfully intimidating... this didn't go unnoticed by Jevil, who's eyes widened at the sudden change of mood. "WELL YOU'RE IN FOR A-" suddenly, Spamton's hand started ringing. It had literally turned into a black phone! "EXCUSE ME ONE MOMENT." Aw... Jevil had to wait!? NO!! He was way too impatient.

"BUT, BUT-"

"HELLO? [[tickling department]]??"

Tickling WHAT!?

"I SEE... IT'S FOR YOU!" Spamton pointed the phone at Jevil.

Before Jevil could even process what's happening, the jester was pushed into the sea of spades, diamonds, and clubs by tiny little Spamtons.

"GYAaAaAaA! WAIT A MINUTE! IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE YOU HAVE FULL HANDS, SO WHAT'S WITH ALL THE MINI SPAMS!?" Jevil rhymed, eyes wide and a nervousness in his belly. His tail curled up closer to his body and he lightly peddled his feet as he tried to glare at the puppet now towering over him, the biggest most genuine grin with a gleam shining off of his colored glasses.

"[[the boys]] ARE HELPING A [[papa!]] OUT~!" Spamton chuckled, the phone disappearing for his actual digits. "ISN'T THAT RIGHT?" The 'boys' nod rapidly in agreement before they start to do their thing.

The tiny Spamtons manage to hold down Jevil's tail and hands, meanwhile Spamton sat on Jevil's legs similarly to how the jester had awhile back. The purple imp's mouth twitched upward nervously, curling in a cat-like manner.

"N-NOW SPAM-" 

"HM? WHATS A MATTER [[jack in the box!]] I THOUGHT YOU LIKED A LITTLE [[MISCHIEF, MISCHIEF!]]" The doll imitated Jevil's voice as he lightly trailed his skittering fingers up the sensitive devil's sides. "A [[CHAOS, CHAOS!]]"

"AYE-MKHMKHM! N-NOW THAHATS... NOT FAIIIR! KHKHKHM! -SNORT-" Jevil retorted, trying not to give the puppet the satisfaction of breaking him as easily as the jester had broken him. He shook his head a bit as it was one of the easiest things he could move at the moment. His hat jingled to the beat of his shaking." YA CAHAN'T JUST - - - KHKHK" Jevil tried to complain about Spamton turning his own words back on him but he couldn't finish his sentence without bursting into giggles already, so he shut his mouth tightly.

"HM? OH ON CONTRAIRE, [[valued friendship]]." Spamton spoke with a smirk in his voice. He started to make his hands go in circles, getting slowly closer to the tummy pudge by the second. "BESIDES, I HAVEN'T HEARD A [[Stop at go!]] YET~!" 

Jevil's cheeks puffed out like a bubble, little snorts occasionally coming out as Spamton circled closer and closer on the jester's belly.

"AWWW... NOW JEVIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID [[IT ISN'T HEALTHY TO HOLD BACK YOUR LAUGHTER]]! YOU AREN'T DOING THAT, ARE YOU?" Spamton asked, a teasing tone seeping out as he finally reached the middle of the jester's tummy, a bit of struggle revealing itself as the jester tried to kick his legs and wave his arms.

"N-NO! I-KHEEHEEHEEM NOT! IT JUHUHUST DOESN'T TIHICKLE! KHMKHMHM!" Jevil squeaked out, trying his hardest to keep what little composure he had. He barely had any to begin with. The jester kept his eyes shut, not wanting to see the doll's face rival his own naturally devilish grin. It was his job to be the menace!

oh.... ohoh that was a BRILLIANT opportunity to be taken! 

"IT DOESNT?'' The tone Spamton had was unclear. Jevil felt the fingers pause, staying on his secretly terribly ticklish tummy for a moment. The jester could assume that the puppet was in thought about something.

"WELL... WHAT ABOUT THIS SPOT?" suddenly the fingers jumped to his ribs, starting to lightly skitter. Jevil nearly let it slip but he kept it in, however before he could process the first transition, another one came. "OR THIS ONE?" Then one to the top of his tummy. "OR [[this one!?]]"  

Oh he couldn't STAND it! Just choose a spot already!! Stop changing!

Suddenly, he felt his arms change positions. Those devilish little Spamtons put his arms above his head!

"OR THIS-" Spamton started, putting his hands down under the imps arms to transition yet again, when be heard a loud and sudden giggly yelp result.

"PPPFF! NYAHAHAHOOOO! SPAMT- AHAHAHAHA-SNORT-GYEEHEEHEEHEE!" Jevil cackled, finally cracking and letting out what had been bubbling under the surface the whole time. His laughter was shrieky and full of snorts which was accompanied by the jingling of his hat as he tossed his head around.

Spamton chuckled along with the jester, his laugh ranging from his own to various other laughs he had heard before. "AWW... THERE WE G0! [[100% customer satisfaction!]]"

His wiggly fingers vibrated the newly discovered tickle spot, ensuring this jester a chuckle fest. " TiCkLE T1CKLE~ [[tiny jester figurines!]] ARE YOU SURE YOU AREN'T [[tickles your fancy?]]? [[Number1ratedsalesman1997]] DOESNT LIKE [[liar, liar plants for hire!]]"

"OKAY OHOHOKAY I'M TIHIHICKLISH! NOHOHOW CUT IT OUT PPPPFF-NOCHIOHOHOHOHOHO!* -SNORT-!" Jevil conceded, trying his hardest to pull his arms down to his sides. "The boys" were holding tight and were much stronger than they looked, especially when working together.

"DO YOU REEAAAAALLY WANT [[remember kid, blue stop signs]]? I THOUGHT YOU LOVED THIS [[hopscotch!]]" Spamton slowed to just a few pokes here and there, admittedly hesitant of continuing after that.

 The Spamlings seemed to feel the same way, starting to loosen their grips to where Jevil could break away easily. 

Am I going too far? Spamton thought as his poking slowed. how do I know if he really wants me to stop? I don't want to hurt him..

 The salesman had never been on the other end before- at least not without the cards being flipped instantly... he only really received the attention, unable to break away as easily from the much taller, much more popular salesmen.

I'm not good at this... what if Jevil doesn't like this? ... he would tell him if he didn't, right?

Oops.. Spamton was spacing out. He just noticed the white noise filling his ears, and the vague popcorn television static he could see through the reflection of his glasses.

"S- pant -Spamton? Ehehe... Hey?" Jevil's voice was unnaturally gentle. He panted a bit, calming himself down while looking his friend over with a bit of concern. "What's a-matter, buddy?" Jevil chuckled. He still hadn't broken out of the Spamlings hold, deciding to just lie there.

Spamton paused, his smile dropping as much as it could physically, before the mini Spamtons fused back into the salesman "I..." the glitch faded as Spamton backed off of Jevil completely. 

What was he thinking? He couldn't do this... it just.. wasn't what he was made to do. He couldn't be silly like this..

That thought saddened him... that he couldn't play a game like this without chickening out. Spamton sat down, scrunching his legs up to his chest, and wrapped his arms around them. "Sorry.. I- just... i'm not.." he couldn't get the words out.. he couldn't describe exactly how he felt without disappointing the clown.

 Jevil seen Spamton, was unsure of himself... doubtful. Now that just wouldn't do! He barely did anything to the clown.

"OI, HEY HEY HEY! WHAT ARE YOU SORRY FOR? I... I THOUGHT WE WERE HAVING FUN, FUN! " Jevil said, trying to get answers from his companion. He finally sat up and put a gloved hand on Spamton's hunched shoulder. "DON'T MAKE ME TURN THE TABLES JUST TO GET A LIL HONESTY, HONESTY," Jevil threatened lightly, giving his friend a playful glare.

Spamton's entire face reddened a bit after that comment, nervousness heightening.

 "W-WELL [[Well well WELLY well well-]] I-[[icebox]] I-[[Isosolese triangle]] I'M NOT S URE [[How to video]] DO THIS. I'M [[ANXIETY!!]] ON MESSING UP, OR [[too far gone..]]." the puppet explained his anxiety as best he could. Things as fluffy as this were so foreign to him already, it's been years since he has played this game.

Jevil looked puzzled, trying to understand what exactly was the problem... But after a moment he came to a conclusion.

"THAT WAS YOUR FIRST TIME, TIME DISHIN IT OUT? I'M IMPRESSED! THE TICKLES DIDN'T HURT AND WEREN'T TOO LIGHT EITHER. I WOULD HAVE SWORE YOU KNEW WHAT YOU WERE DOING, DOING. LOOK AT ME, EVER THE FOOL, UEE HEE HEE!" Jevil giggled as he explained in no uncertain terms that Spamton had done nothing wrong. In fact, he seemed pretty good at tickling already. Must be in their glitched out genes.

Spamton's face seemed to increase in color at that... now he felt bashful of the compliment. "... ARE YOU JUST [[you're just saying that!]] TO MAKE [[number1ratedsalesman1997]] [[feel better soon!]] ..?." The salesman turned his head, confused at the compliment.. he truly wasn't expecting that. In all honesty, he was waiting for himself to screw everything up with his friends like last time. To have both Seam, and Jevil leave at any given moment because he was being a sleaze, or unintentionally disrespecting them.

"IF I WERE, WERE, WOULD I DO THIS!?" Jevil questioned before rolling onto his back and acting like a dog that wanted his belly rubbed. "C'MON! LAY IT ON ME, UEE HEE HEE! OR ELSE I'LL PICK UP WHERE YOU LEFT OFF~" Jevil teased with a grin, trying to spur the spambot into action.

... Spamton could cry tears of joy if he wasn't just playfully threatened. His confidence spiked up as his face returned to its normal white hue... it was time to scratch that itch he had just minutes prior.

"LEAVING YOURSELF OPEN FOR ME, [[AYYYYYyyyyy!]]? WELL, LET ME REOPEN OUR CONTRACT WITH A NEW [[8-digit phone number]] SPECIL!" The normally pink and yellow glasses flooded with an intimidating reflection that flashed seemingly from nowhere.

"YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T NEED [[friends |The boys| i've got knives!]] TO SH0 W I MEAN [[business]]. IVE GOT THE RIGHT [[trick up my sleeve]] FOR YOU, JEVIL.."  That grin seemed to widen as Spamton drew closer to Jevil, teasingly wiggling his fingers at him before pouncing on him and kneeding over his sides and ribs.

"UEEHEEHEEHEEHEE! -SNORT- SO NOHOW YOU CHOOSE TOHOHO PLAY WITH M-GYAHAHAHAHEEE!" Jevil cackled out, immediately bursting with laughter. He kicked his feet and flailed his arms aimlessly while he let Spamton give him the "deal of a life time".

The doll's fingers swirled and scritched slowly up, just barely grazing the jesters armpits.. closer and closer… Jevil was secretly expecting it so the blow wouldn't be as shocking as before to the ticklish area... however he was startled by the rapid booping to his hip area on both sides.

"AAAAH!!!" Jevil shrieked in surprise. He hopped up reflexively, accidentally knocking the spambot off of him and onto the floor.

Pink and yellow swirls encircled Spamton's glasses while his jaw fell ajar, and little angel spams flew around his head. Spamton shook his head, making the angel Spamtons disappear all the while Jevil rubbed the tickles away from his hip joints. Spamton hopped to his feet, quietly clasping his hands together in assessment of the situation "HM? A LITTLE [[jump rope!]]? I THINK I HAVE A [[home remedies]] FOR THAT." The spam-bot snuck to Jevil's leg, before jumping on and attaching himself. He started to climb him like a kitten.

"AYEEEHEEHEE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME!? CLIMBING ME LIKE A TREEHEEHEE!?" the jester giggled, dancing around, hopping from foot to foot as Spamton crawled up his leg.

When Spamton got to Jevil's midsection, the Email-bot gently squeezed the tickle spot under the jester uniform every time he grabbed to climb.

"ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU'RE NOT [[Christmas trees now 50% off at your local Walmart!]]? THATS [[false advertising]]! FOR SOMEONE WHO ISN'T A [[fine oak]]]..." Spamton climb up until he was on Jevil's back, securing his position with his knees. "YOU'RE QUITE THE [[Blueberry Maple Syrup]]." 

The puppet tickled along the jester's shoulder blades, and neck coil, which scrunched, and skyrocketed off his shoulders upon the unexpected touch.

"NYA HAHA! YOU LITTLE GYEEHEEHEEHEE! -SNORT-!" Jevil squawked, trying to catch his head and put it back on. It was boinging around, the coils now fully accessible to the puppet teasing the area. "WHYHY MUST THE DOHOHOLL BE SO CRUEL HEEHEEHEE T-TO TIHIHIHIHICKLE THE NIGHT LIHIHIGHTS OUT OHOF THE F-FOOHOOHOOL, FOOHOOHOOHOOHOOL!?"

Jevil continued to dance around, unable to dislodge the gremlin latched onto him.

Spamton bulleted laughter with a cheeky and mischievous tone. The salesman skittered over the exposed neck coil while using his other hand to poke under jevil's arm when he tried to reach up and grab his head. 

"IM [[SURPRISE!!]] YOU'RE ABLE TO [[Time it to ryhme it!]] WHILE IM [[Tickletickletickletickle~]] YOU!" He teased, swapping from multiple spots with that single free hand away from the coil.

Jevil slammed the one arm down that Spamton could reach every time the puppet poked and prodded under there, making it hard for the clown to reach his hat to put his head back on his shoulders. He couldn't get it with just one hand! The other was practically tied to his side in defense.

"UEEHEAHAAHAaHaHA- -SNORT-!!! OHONOHOHO NO THIHIS ISN'T FAIR- N-NOHOT UNDER THERE, THERE!!" 

"NOT [[right there on the dotted line!]]? ARE YOU SURE? THIS SPOT LOOKS LIKE IT MAKES YOU [[satisfied customer!]]"

"NAHAHAHOOO! BAHAHAD SPOT! BAD SPAHAHAHAAAAT! UEEHEEHEEGEEHEE! -SNORT-" the Jester laughed, squatting down for a moment. He suddenly sprung up, his body catching up to his head, and he grabbed one of the tails of his hat. He swiftly popped it back into place before bouncing back onto the floor.

Jevil sprawled out on the floor belly down, trying to catch his breath.

Spamton paused after a moment, letting the jester have a bit of a break to recover from the monkey climb tickle attack.

"HAVE YOU HAD ENOUGH OF THE [[Stand-up specil]] YET [[now introducing the lil' devil darlin!]]?"

Spamton turned around, facing Jevil's J-shaped tail. It was wagging from left to right in a cat-like manner, almost similar to a wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tube man. 

"OR DO I HAVE TO WHIP OUT THE  [[ BIIIIIG GUNS! Come and buy them before huntin' season!]]?" 

If Spamton could stretch his toothy grin even further into a menacingly playful expression, he would probably be wearing it in this moment. He had an ongoing theory, and if it proved to be correct, he would most likely have Jevil beat, if not even from when the clown got him.

"W-WAIT... WHAT GUNS, GUNS?" Jevil asked nervously. He wasn't exactly sure what Spamton's next target was, but the little doll's confidence was worrying  to the Jester. The spambot was tuckering him out quite quickly already. But admittedly his curiosity was peaked too.

"IT DEPENDS," he started, the Jester hearing the clear grin in his voice. "HOW [[ready, set, go!]] ARE YOU TO FIND 0UT?"

"I-I... UM... HEHE..." Jevil's smile curled up into his own grin. "MORE READY THAN YOU ARE FOR MY INEVITABLE REVENGE! UEEHEEHEE!" he teased back.

Spamton's face flooded red, steam coming out of his ears in embarrassment while a honking choo-choo sound effect accompanied it. How DARE him! Spamton wasn't gonna get all embarrassed from that teasing little jack in the box right now! 

"FOR SOMEONE IN THE [[sticky situation]] YOU ARE," Spamton inquired, grabbing Jevil's tail with a hand. "YOU'RE AWFULLY BR4VE   TO POKE [[the bear!]] POKE [[the sides]] POKE [[the tum]]!"

"HEY! HANDS OFF THE TAIL OR ELSE I WILL POKE 'THE TUM, TUM'!" Jevil squeaked, trying to sound intimidating but failing miserably. He tried to wiggle his tail out of the puppet's grip, but he seemed to be latched onto it like a koala.

Sensing the nervousness, Spamton hummed curiously. Perhaps Jevil DID have a secret to hide about his tail... he was much too curious for his own good, the trashman brought his hand up to the tippy top of that strange looking imp tail, giving it a slight poke. Jevil loudly squeaked, his tail starting to wag back and forth similarly to a worm trying to escape.

"SPAMTON I SWEAR TO SEAM, IF YOU DO IT, ILL COME BACK TEN TIMES AS HARD! MORE POWERFUL THAN THE RED JOKER CARD, CARD!" Jevil was beyond nervous. He kept his tail in sight for VARIOUS reasons... It was a weak point. If Spamton even tried- 

"OH? MORE POWERFUL THAN [[here kitty-kitty!]]?" Spamton wiggled a couple of fingers on it. "I'D HONESTLY LIKE TO SEE YOU [[try, try again!]]"

"PFFFPAHAHAHA! I WIHIHILL JUSTYOUWAHAHAHAHAIT!-SNORT-" the little devil cackled already. Something about his tail made it just so sensitive. Perhaps it was because it was a true mark of his identity as an object, a key part of his being. It wasn't fair! Seam's tail wasn't like that, so why did his have to be!?

"CO0cHie COOCHie CO0  YOU LITTLE [[pop goes the weasel!]]~ IT DOESN'T T1CKL3, DOES IT?" The salesman teased. Now that made it worse! Couldn't Spamton just shut up already!? Not that Jevil wasn't having fun, but BOY the clown's fingers were starting to itch for a stuffed tummy.

"YOUOHOU'RE GOHOHONNA BEHEAHEHA SOHOHOREHEHEY!!!" Jevil threatened through his crazy clown belly laughs.

 Spamton felt he really didn't need to try too hard to tickle it. The puppet just barely wiggled over it, and the ticklish jester was already in stitches!  

Jevil at this moment realized just why Spamton never got the chance to tickle others often... 

"ITS TO0 BA D, RE4LLY." Spamton poked the tail with a single finger. "I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT YOU'D HAVE [[prison break!]] BY NOW. GUESS THAT OLD SPAM- SPAMTON G. SPAMTON HAS GOT THE [[number1rated salesman |G1gGleb0x|]] BEAT!" 

it was because the dealmaker seemed to make the premise of giving him a wrecking too hard to resist. 

Jevil's tail suddenly wrapped around Spamton's hand, the tip of it being placed in it similarly to a phone. Shocked at the sudden change, Spamton froze his tickling and started to stare at the tip in confusion.

Jevil started to catch his breath again, which let him be able to make ringing noises while shaking his tail like a phone ringing off its handle.

"HEHhaHeh... WELL, WELL? .. GONNA ANSWER IT?" Jevil asked, looking behind himself at Spamton, a look of which spamton returned with a nervous one. The puppet looked back towards the 'phone' hesitantly, before putting the receiver to his ear. "H-HELLO?"

"HELLO, HELLO!" Jevil said aloud.

Spamton stuttered.

"WH0 1-1 S THIS?"

"TICKLING DEPARTMENT!" 

Spamton's glitching cut out, his tone quiet and anxiously squeaky.

"... t… tickling department?"

All of a sudden, the tail whipped him up, throwing Spamton in the air before catching him in a comfortable snake-like coil. Spamton recovered from the sudden scare, before realizing the situation he was in.

The clown was up and at em', a devilish grin on his face alongside those playfully mischievous eyes. Oh spamton was a GONER! Literally, AND figuratively. Jevil had just been tickled to hell and back.. and still he somehow had a surprising amount of energy left. Spamton's eyes widened, his cheeks increasingly reddening at the playful expression on his friend's face... 

"ITS FOR YOU, YOU!~"

-- . .- -. .-- .... .. .-.. .

Seam's ears perked up once again to the sound of laughter. This time it was the glitchy cackling of that sly salesman. Thaaaat was to be expected honestly. The cat's keen ears caught every little noise that came from their playtime. Jevil wasn't one to truly get exhausted from a game so much as bored of playing the same game for too long. Perhaps that's why Spamton was so confident in pushing the joker's buttons.  Some of us have to learn the hard way, he supposed.

Seam chuckled to himself, sipping his tea and listening to the chaos in the other room. He missed having a family. They all did... So it only made sense that they stick together. 

The sound of crashing and squealing and laughing and utter chaos... 

He could certainly get used to this again.

[simpalert]

its wholesome sonic and tails Wednesday and I'm finally not gonna miss it!

rain sucks man [a soft and comforting sonic and tails fic about them being bros]

ship:none

story count:1

au;main -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

it was late at night, the rain was pouring outside and everyone in the team sonic house was fast asleep. it was peaceful, it was quiet. until BOOM! lightning strikes, waking tails. who was sleeping at his work desk [again]. he scurried to his well-known safe place, aka sonic. he goes into sonics room where sonics already waiting for him with open arms, tails runs to sonic and hugs him. he softly crys into sonics sweater, clinging onto him in the hug.

"shh lil buddie, it ok," sonic says in a comforting and soft voice "your ok, it's just some lightning. it'll pass soon". he holds tails close and lets him wrap his tails around his arm, and tails soon starts to calm down and then starts to drift off to sleep. sonic sets tails next to him in his bed and covers him up. then goes to sleep himself.

It's the next day and sonic wakes up to amy making breakfast as usual. "hey sonic" amy says in a warm tone "how'd things go, I heard it was storming last night. is tails ok?". sonic nods and says "yeah, he was a bit scared but I calmed him down." he smiles then says "he still sleeping, curled up right where I left him". amy smiles as well and says "well that's good to hear". and soon enough tails groggily comes in, holding one of his tails like a blanket, making soft little tired yips.

"heh, good morning sleepy fox," sonic says with a soft chuckle "ya sleep ok? he also asks. tails nods as he climbs into the chair next to sonic, who pats tail's head with another chuckle. amy then places a plate of waffles in front of both boys "hope you guys like em," she says with a smile. "thanks names we will" replies sonic returning her smile with one of his own. he and tails both start eating their pancakes. chatting and hanging out. just like a hero and his little hero brother should. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

not the best but i tried

[newtabfics]

CAN WE PLEASE HAVE WHOLESOME Y/N X ZELDA BEING SAPPHIC CUZ LIKE MY HEART AFTER THAT DRABBLE

I'm glad you loved it. So enjoy the days after Zelda's home!

Zelda chuckled when she saw Y/N poking her head through the doorway. Link smirked from his spot in the corner of the room, keeping quiet as Symin approached.

"Miss Y/N, you know you're allowed to enter the schoolhouse, right?" He asked, making the baker flush brightly.

He led her in, making Zelda chuckle as she saw the basket. "Ah, you were scared of the kids again?" She teased, kissing her girlfriend's cheek when she approached the teacher.

"Y-Yeah. I uh...I brought some for everyone. It's actually a cheese-filled bread Koyin and I thought of."

Link's eyebrows shot up at that, making Zelda blink as the breads were passed around. "Careful though! They're best eaten hot so they might--"

"HAAA HAAA!!!" Nebb shouted as he burned the roof of his mouth.

The other kids taunted him for not waiting as Zelda caught Link covering his mouth, attempting to mask his own pain caused by his overeagerness.

Y/N looked to Zelda as she took a careful bite and then hummed happily. "It's so good. Thank you!"

Y/N smiled and nodded. "I'm glad you love it, Teacher," She teased, making her girlfriend blush.

Link smiled as Zelda scolded her for flirting so brazenly in front of people. He was glad they were happy. It had been about a week since Zelda had returned but Y/N's fear of losing her was starting to show on the baker's face as dark circles were beginning to form.

Not that he could blame her.

[xylonz]

Eren & Hange ✧˖*°࿐

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

Eren struggles with who he is; his gender identity and embracing who he truly is when his fate is limited and set in stone. But when Hange goes looking for him he is reminded of their bravery and pride in being who they are, and that helps ease the young boy into accepting who he is, alongside with Hange’s undying and enthusiastic sweet support it becomes a little too easy to be happy for the first time in who they were.

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

🔗 http://archiveofourown.org/works/58851973

[heya-moth]

But you, Robin Minamoto, shall be mine Chapter 1

Hi author Echo here! This is the first chapter of Son of spy, Daughter of Scout. My Silly oc's will be in this, only two though. This first chapter is a prologue of sorts, it's purpose is to give context for who these ocs are-ish. Anyways next chapter will have the standard TF2 chaos! до свидания

Word count: 1257

July 10th, 1963, Boston MA.

It’s a hot summer day in the suburbs of Boston, the sun is blazing as two older women sit outside, and two lemonades sit on the patio table as these lovely ladies chat up a storm.

“Jeremy!” Ma calls for her son, “Don’t worry Sachi, he’s a good boy.” Ma coos softly to her companion

Jeremy rushed out of the house sprinting onto the patio, only stopping when he reached his ma. He’s a handsome young lad, 21 years of age, with bright blue eyes, white teeth, and an athletic physique. He is also a gentleman, not in a romantic way in a ‘Ma taught me right’ gentleman. He will always be awkward around women his age.

“Jerbear,” Ma coos out her loving nickname to Jeremy's despair, “This is Miss Sachiko Minamoto.” Ma motions to the shorter inky-haired woman in the garden chair next to hers with a smile. “She moved in last week when you were visiting your brothers.”

Miss Minamoto wasn’t a girl his age, she was closer to his Ma’s age but a bit younger, she had soft yet dark inky black hair that was all neatly clipped into place into a low ponytail, and small dark brown eyes that were almost black if you don’t pay attention. Her name states that she is a Japanese woman, and her belly shows that she is a pregnant woman. Yet she’s lovely all the same

“Oh cool!” Jeremy chirped with a smile before bowing. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Minamoto”

Sachiko laughs and smiles while speaking in a different language before going silent for a moment.  “Please just call me Sachi, I am nobody's Mrs.” She said with a somber smile

Jeremy gasps, “Well you could’ve fooled me! You’re just too pretty so of course I assumed a lucky man had already scooped you up into marriage!

Ma and Sachiko giggle to themselves, “Thank you, you are so kind, Jeremy.”

Jeremy smiles as he pulls up another chair. It’s a nice hot summer day in the Burbs of Boston, two older ladies and a 21-year-old Jeremy sit in garden chairs on the back patio, and two lemonades sit on the patio table as the three chat up a storm.

December 24th, 1963, Boston MA 8:45 PM.

The front door slams open as Jeremy tries to balance all of the paper bags full of groceries in his arms and on his head so he can open the door properly. The brunette stumbles, dropping an odd vegetable here and there, into the kitchen. He plops the groceries down with a sigh, why’d Ma make him go to the store on Christmas Eve? Speaking of Ma, Jeremey didn’t see her, or hear her.

“MA I’M HOME!” Jeremy shouts and waits five seconds. No response

“MA?!?” He shouts again sprinting throughout the house looking for his dearest mother. Frustrated, he dashes out the back door, down the patio, running through the nicely mowed backyard he hops over the fence to Sachiko’s backyard and lets himself in. Ma and Sachiko quickly became best friends after she had moved in five months ago. If Ma isn't home, she's probably with Sachi.

“Sachi?? Ma??” Jeremy calls out walking into the mudroom. He sighs softly and takes an inhale to scream, but then, he sees it. A little paper hanging on the refrigerator. That’s odd, Sachi never leaves things on the fridge, unless they’re important. With that notion in mind, Jeremy walked up to the kitchen and snatched the paper off of the fridge. It’s a note, in his mother's handwriting, it reads…Jeremy, when you see this note, it means I am with Sachiko in the hospital, she is in labor and about to give birth to the bundle of joy in her. Please come to the hospital ASAP.

Without hesitation Jeremy booked it to the hospital, not even bothering to close and lock up either homes.

Ma stood next to Sachiko holding her hand with both of her own. “Don’t worry Sachi, I’m right here sweetheart.” She coos softly to her dear friend, “you’re not alone, I will not leave your side until you are ready”

The sound of Sachi crying and straining to push her baby out filled the sounds of the room, the doctor and nurses muffled by her sobs, until. Sachi’s eyes widened as she huffed and puffed. Her face was red puffy and wet from her tears, her chest heaving from her screams.

“Congrats,” The doctor said after cutting the umbilical cord, “it’s a girl.”

A wave of happiness and relief rushed over the two women.

“I told you, Sachi, you’re still here,” Ma said softly, before kissing her on the forehead.

Sachi smiles weakly as the doctor hands the tiny baby girl to her for the first time. She came out with a blonde head of hair and soft blue eyes that didn’t match her mother's. As soon as the baby girl got put into her mother's arms, she fell asleep.

Sachiko laughed dryly. “Aren’t babies supposed to cry?” She asked with a smile 

“Not all–” Ma stifles her giggles “Three of my eight didn’t cry immediately, Jerbear being one” “Oh I hope my girl can be as kind as him” Sachiko smiled softly “Have you thought of a name?” “No…” Sachi trails off “She kind of looks like–”

Thump! Thump! Thump! Thump! SLAM!!! Jeremy ran in, sweaty and out of breath.  “I made it…!” he managed to say in between huffs of trying to catch his breath.

Ma shakes her head “Please don’t tell me you ran all the way here” Jeremy looks up at her and blinks “Jer…” “I was acting on instinct ma!!” Jeremy retorts and walks over to the bed. “How are ya feeling Sachi?”

“A lot better now that it's over” Sachi smiles weakly “Stay here Jer, I’ll go get us some food” Ma smiled as she walked out of the room.

Jeremy smiled softly at Sachi. “You and Ma scared me!” Sachi laughs softly and sighs “To make up for it do you want to hold her?” “For real?” “For real. Unless you don’t want to”

Jeremy outstretched his arms and stares at Sachiko dead in her eyes “Give me the child”

Sachi and the remaining nurse laugh as Sachi hands over Baby girl to Jeremy with the utmost care. He cradles her softly and pulls her close to his chest, she yawns and looks up at him with those big blue eyes.

“Hey little Robin,” Jeremy coos softly. “Ready to become my little sidekick?”

“Robin?” “Oh, it's a comic book character, he's the sidekick to Batman” “Ah… still it's a beautiful name… and it would blend her in.” “Awh Sachi no you don’t have to–” “No Jer–” Sachiko interrupts. “I want to name her Robin.’

Jeremy smiles and looks down at baby Robin. She’s asleep in his arms again. Then a thought crossed Jeremy’s mind, a sad thought. She's going to grow up without a father, like he did, but she also doesn’t have any older brothers to protect her. Well, now that won’t do. That won’t do at all. 

‘Don’t worry lil Robbie, I got you. Forever and always, I will be the best big brother I can be, promise.’ Jeremy thought to himself as he watched Robin sleep. 

It’s December 24th, 11:25 PM in Boston Massachusetts snow is falling, carolers are singing, families are huddled by their fireplaces watching Christmas movies, and Jeremy just welcomed his little sister into the world.

[pattysplaceofplaces]

Prologue-What is this?

A heartwarming story in which you adopt a tbh creature 

     Why couldn’t life give you a break for once? You had barely been able to pay rent and then you got fired because the Mc Donald’s down the street decided to use a fancy robot cashier because I baby cried when they took a look at your barely functioning face. You had decided to go on a little walk to clear your mind, trying to figure out what your next course of action should be. Unfortunately it seemed like god was purposely spiting you today because while on your walk it started pouring. 

You muttered a poem of “fucks” as you walked home, hugging yourself as an attempt to keep yourself warm. While you stomped back to your apartment with the class of an elephant you heard something.

It sounded like a dog whimpering, helpless in the rain. You stopped in your tracks to try and gauge where the sound was coming from. You crouched and looked under someone’s neon blue and green truck.

You saw its large doe eyes peering into yours. It backed up out of fear. You reached your hand out to it. “It’s okay baby.” You whispered in the kindest voice you could muster. Usually animals hated you, your childhood dog tried to push you off the roof of the house and your cat tried to poison you, seeing your attempt to get this poor puppy out from underneath the truck was successful had you surprised. 

“There you go.” You picked it up with both of your hands. It was very small. You held it under a streetlight to get a better view of the poor puppy. 

It was not a puppy. 

You didn’t even know what it was. It was covered in white fur with the stubbiest legs you’ve ever seen on a creature. Its eyes were like large black holes with the streetlight reflecting on the surface. Its small ears (which you could barely see because it’s so fluffy) were pinned to its head and its bobtail in between its legs. 

You didn’t know what the hell it was but you were taking it home with you.

You took off your jacket to bundle it up in and hastily began your walk back home. You could feel the little creature shivering and cuddling into your chest, you held it like your life depended on it. 

Once you got home you plopped the creature into your bathroom sink and turned on your hair dryer. At first the noise seemed to startle it but then it bravely came closer and felt the warm breeze coming from it. You used a damp wash cloth to clean off the chunks of dirt knotted in its fur. 

Once it was all clean you set it down in your bed and watched as it settled on your bed. It was weird, like nothing you have ever seen before but it was undeniably adorable. It stood on its hind legs as if reaching out for you, your chest felt heavy yet light at the same time. You climbed into bed and the creature immediately laid on your chest. You put your hand on its back and tenderly pet it as it closed its eyes. 

Both of you fell asleep on the comfort of each other’s company. 

[sari-wn]

🚀✨️💞🛐

if anyone's looking for a fic like this, here's a Great NASA-DANNY fic that i love. he gets to be an astronaut after all! 🥹

Space Case by TorScrawls on AO3. 20k words.

https://archiveofourown.org/chapters/103987272?show_comments=true&view_full_work=false#comment_758125558

DPxDC Let Danny Be an Astronaut Dammit!

Every dpxdc fic and their mother has Danny not be able to be an astronaut because of his accident. Well I say NO!

LET THE BOY LIVE HIS DREAMS!!

We're talking DC, where meta humans are just a thing that exists. People have extraordinary powers and that's normal. NASA would totally have a specialized space program for metas who's abilities make them particularly desirable for outer atmospheric conditions!

Oh? What's that? You're a meta and your ability make you impervious to extreme temperatures? That would be super helpful in the freezing vacuum of space! Your ability makes you less sensitive to negative effects from g-forces and changes in gravitational pull? You can spend so much more time out of atmosphere without negative consequences!

NASA would love the opportunities opened up by these individuals and their specialized abilities. Give them Danny? They would be frothing at the goddamn mouth.

Doesn't need to breath, impervious to cold temperatures, can fly, so much more, and, if we go space core Danny, doesn’t need rations because he can get sustenance straight from the stars? He's everything they've ever wanted! Who cares if his vitals are fucky? They're normal for him! And once they have record of what his normal values are? No issue! In my vet classes we learn that you wouldn't treat a cat the same way as a bird because they have different needs and normal values. Well it's the same for humans and metas! I don't think Danny's different biology would be as big of an issue as a lot of fics make it out to be.

[gothamite-rambler]

Duke Thomas gets added to the payroll

Bruce Wayne (seeing Duke walk past his office): Duke.

Duke backwards walked to Bruce’s office.

Duke: Sup?

Bruce: Did you check your bank account? The direct deposit should’ve hit.

Duke: The what? Oh you were serious about that?

Bruce: Of course, you’re not only my son, but you do work for me and you deserve an income.

Duke: Thanks dude, but I can’t take your money I work at the library.

Bruce: Duke, trust me. You deserve this. I do it for all my kids… except Tim.

Duke: Why not Tim?

Bruce: Long story… he owns part of my company, plus he- he definitely embezzled a lot of my funds before I noticed so him working at my company is his paycheck.

Duke (alarmed): That was him?!

Bruce: Yeah, but that’s not important currently. You enjoy your first payhcheck and I’m proud of you.

Duke: Thanks man.

Duke left the office, checking his phone as he walked to his room. He nearly dropped his phone seeing the four digits in his bank account that had five dollars in it three days ago.

Duke (shocked, happy): Three- Three thousand dollars?! Woooooooo! I’m eating good tonight! No wait, game stop here I come!

Duke ran out the house passing by Stephanie and Jason.

Duke: I can finally buy a PlayStation!

Jason: Wait until he finds out it’s a monthly payment.

Stephanie: I’ll tell him later. Want to go tell Tim about it first?

Jason: 100% yes.

[talaok]

Sunbathing

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: you’ve decided to sunbathe topless, or as your husband Joel would put it, you’ve decided to torture him.

Warnings: needy Joel, kind of sub!joel, unprotected p in v, premature ejaculation, creampie, oral sex (f receiving), come play.

a/n: i sunbathed topless for the first time and well this wrote itself

"You've seen my boobs before babe" A soft laugh bubbled up your throat as you turned your head left.

He wasn't even pretending not to be staring.

"Not like this"

You smiled, "what does that even mean?"

"not out... here"

You lowered your sunglasses to see him better, tilting your head to ask for further explanation

Yes you were outside, by the pool of the beautiful summer house you'd rented, but you didn't get how that made any difference, they were the same boobs he'd seen hours prior in your bed.

"I'm not used to not doing anything about them"

"ah" you hummed "is it that hard?"

You didn't even need to look at the smirk painting his face to regret your choice of words.

"yeah babydoll, it's real hard"

You only needed to lower your gaze a little to asses his statement.

"You're incorrigible"

"And you're torturin' me darlin'"

"How am I torturing you?" you laughed "I'm just taking advantage of the privacy we have to get a good tan"  

"and besides, I seem to remember how hard it is for you to see me with the whole bikini on too"

He sat up, the sunbed squeaking as he faced you.

"It ain't my fault if my wife's so pretty it hurts"

"you get so dramatic when you're horny" you chuckled, rolling your eyes.

He smiled, letting his gaze wander all over your body for a good minute, before getting back at your face

"nothin's gonna happen is it?" his tone was full of hope nonetheless

"no baby" you shook your head

He sighed, dramatically letting his head fall to his chest

"I'll have a swim then"

"have fun honey"

__ __ __

"darlin'?"

Not even ten minutes had passed, and that scene from the Barbie movie with the "Ken! Go for a walk or something" line couldn't not pop into your head.

"yes?"

He was standing right next to your sunbed, dripping wet and blocking out the sun.

"don't ya need sunscreen?"

A soft smile pulled at your lips.

Ten minutes, that's how long it took for him to come up with that.

"I put it on already"

He wasn't gonna give up, not on the first try.

"how long ago?"

"an hour, I think"

"the sun's real strong now doll," he said, drying his hair with a towel before throwing it on his bed "I think it's best if you put some more on… I can do it for you if you don't feel like it"

You chuckled, looking up at him, but he stayed in character, continuing to look oh-so worried about your safety.

"Somehow I knew that offer was coming"

"'m just worried about my wife, 's all"

he'd crouched down, taking your hand in his

"mh-mh" you hummed, sarcasm tracing your tone

"can't have you get sunburt now, can we?"

"no, we can't" you played along, smiling at him

"'f course" he murmured, leaning down to leave a soft kiss on your lips as he grabbed the sunscreen.

"I'm so lucky to have such a caring husband"

"I'm the only lucky one babydoll"

He gave you one more kiss, before he leaned away and got to work.

He squeezed some cream into his hand, but to your surprise, his hands didn't land where you'd expected them to-

Only his eyes were betraying him. They were only on one, or actually two things even when it was your legs he was massaging.

The coldness of the cream and his hands felt good against your warm body, so much you couldn't help but hum appreciatively.

"feels good?"

"yeah baby" you breathed as his hands made their way to your thighs.

It always amazed you how hands so big, rough, and strong were able to be so gentle and soft on you.

You couldn't deny the shivers running up your body when his fingers reached your inner thighs, getting close to your core.

"what's that?" your husband was smirking like a cat, as he dedicated himself much too long on that spot.

"I didn't say anything"

If he thought this was gonna work, he was wrong. It was too hot, and you were too relaxed to do what he so obviously wanted to do... although you both knew how much you liked seeing him desperate...

He still didn't touch your boobs, no, next were your shoulders, then your arms, and then... when he felt on the brink of exploding, when he couldn't stop himself anymore, he squeezed a generous amount of sunscreen in his hands, and oh so gently started massaging your tits.

He couldn't stop a soft groan from fleeing his lips.

It felt amazing- of course it felt amazing, but you didn't wanna give him the satisfaction, and this was mostly for him, not for you, so your eyes remained closed as you pretended like it was nothing.

But that only lasted so long, because Joel could endure just about 30 seconds of that before he was bending down, and his mouth was sucking your nipple.

"Joel!" you gasped, your eyes snapping open just in time to see him climb onto you to straddle your waist, and then go right back to groping and licking and sucking your nipples like it was his life long duty.

"baby you're all wet" you tried complaining, but the smile on your lips was everlasting.

He looked so damingly cute like this, looking up at you with those big doe eyes as he worshipped your tits.

"so are you"

And yeah so what if you were- there's only so much a woman can do in front of this.

A soft laugh spilled from your lips as your hand went to find a place in his hair, your back arching to offer more of yourself to him.

"I don't even know how good it is for you to be licking sunscreen"

The look he gave you made it very clear he didn't give one single fuck.

And just when you were about to protest again, his teeth had gently bit your nipple, and a moan had spilled from your lips.

he took that as an incentive to go further, his hand slowly sliding down your belly, between your bodies, until it was seeping underneath your bikini bottoms.

"babe-" you stopped him, your voice breathless

His hand stopped on your mound as he groaned in frustration.

You could feel his rock-hard cock on you since the moment he straddled you- the man was desperate.

"please doll" he murmured against the soft skin of your chest in between kisses "Gimmie something-anything” he pleaded “Have mercy on your poor husband"

Your response was mixed between a laugh and a moan

"I can take care of you if you want"

He shook his head, his teeth grazing your nipple "Need to feel you darlin’"

Again, a soft giggle rumbled from your chest

"’S too hot to have sex here baby"

His hand had gotten out of your bikini to reach the other on your waist.

"the pool- the ground? fuck- anywhere you want sugar, just tell me where"

His clothed hard-on was rubbing against your core now, and fuck but once again you’d succumbed to Joel and his goddamn irresistible neediness.

"bring me back into the house"

It was like he’d been waiting his whole life to hear those words.

In a haze of kisses and lust, he’d picked you up, letting you hold onto him by wrapping your arms and legs around his body as he hurriedly walked into the house.

He didn’t make it far enough to encounter a single surface- and perhaps that was because he’d stopped looking and placed you against the wall the moment he’d passed the threshold.

His mouth was on your tits again, his cock was out, and his fingers had pulled your bikini to the side.

He said nothing as he slowly began entering you, the only sounds in the room being your moan as you threw your head back, and the groan he emitted, muffled by your skin.

“Oh fuck” you cried once he bottomed out.

Your husband was a very gifted man.

"'m not gonna last"

He sounded like the mere act of talking was taking all of his energy, and yet he was thrusting up into you like it was a matter of life or death.

"'s ok"

"I've been hard since you took your top off" he murmured, his breath fanning over your chest “you-you-jesus”

Your left hand passed through his hair, softly soothing him.

“‘S alright baby, don’t wait for me”

“You’re too fuckin’-” he tried to speak, but he was interrupted by yet another groan

“What?” you taunted him, a smirk pulling at your lips “what is it baby?”

His eyes were wide with desperation as he looked up at you, as his mouth stole languid kisses from your tits.

“Too hot- too goddamn perfect”

You bit down a grin at that, still stroking his hair

“I love you baby” you breathed, his cock reaching the deepest, most fucking amazing spot inside you in the meantime.

The moment those words left your lips your husband was fucked- the only words he was able to mutter were a series of -fuckshitgoddamn- before he inevitably reached his peak, filling you up with rope after rope of come that never seemed to end.

He remained like that for a little while, buried inside you, eyes closed, mouth still connected with your boob, until you left a gentle kiss on the crown of his head, and he woke up from his heavenly trance.

He let out a soft groan as he slipped out of you, and took his time letting you down.

You were smiling at him with that soft smile that melted his insides right up, and he couldn’t help but lean in and kiss it, kiss you like you were a soft delicate thing that he was scared of breaking.

“I love you more” he promised, kissing you again, even if you were smiling.

“Feel better now?”

You said it like he was a kid with a stomach bug, and he couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Yeah darlin’” he murmured against your mouth “thank you”

“You don’t have to thank me” you laughed, but he was already shaking his head

“Yes I do”

And without further explanation, he’d dropped to his knees.

He slid your bikini to the side once again, looking up at you with only adoration in his eyes.

“Baby you don’t have to” you tried to reason with him, but his mouth was already latched to your clit, and your hand had already flown to his hair.

He remained on your bud long enough to make you desperate, and then he started focusing on your whole core, his tongue lapping between your folds with what could only be described as feral hunger.

His come was everywhere, and yet he didn’t care, he was happy tasting the mix of your fluids, because that’s how Joel was- a nasty nasty man- only for you.

So much so that you felt his tongue enter your hole, simulating what he was doing just minutes before with his cock.

“Fuck-babe-”

Your moans were breathless, more like whines, like prayers.

You were looking at him as he was looking at you and Jesus... He looked fucking heavenly.

His hair all tussled from your fingers, his blown-out pupils, his never-stopping tongue-

“Joel” you cried, but he didn’t dare speak a word as he went back to your clit.

“Shit-baby- god!”

You had to tighten your hold on his hair as your orgasm crept up your body- and it was as you heard him groan with pleasure, as he sucked your clit into his mouth like a man starved, that it all came crumbling down, and you felt your body light on fire as your climax took over.

You were moaning and crying into the air for a good minute before you were sane again.

Only Joel hadn’t stopped eating you out for a single second, and even then, he looked like he had no intention of doing so

“Baby-baby” you whimpered, having to literally pull him away from your core.

He was smiling like a kid, and you couldn’t help but follow suit.

He put your bikini back in place, and then stood up, his hands lingering on your waist

“You’re crazy”

He couldn’t help but kiss you before answering,

“You make me”

[1lostsoul0fishbowl]

BEST SIBLINGS EVER - Eddie and Max, by @emeriart , for my story With a Little Help From My Friends

…She finds him again in front of a candy display, singing to himself as always, apparently debating the merits of Red Vines versus Twizzlers. When he notices her he grins and starts singing to her, flourishing the package of Twizzlers as an imaginary microphone. So don't you ever be ashamed, when you're only lonely… And oh you can call out my name... when you're only lonely...

Max feels herself blushing a little; those lyrics are a bit too on the nose today. “You’re such a nerd. How the hell do you know every single song that’s been on?”

“Uh, hello? You can thank your best friend for that.” She giggles at his fake sarcasm. “El and Hopper love all this corny shit, and when my little Ella-bella wants me to play something for her, I play it. It gets stuck in my head.” Unexpectedly he grabs her hand and twirls her, as if they’re doing a fancy waltz. No, there's nothing wrong with you… Darling, I get lonely, too… He crescendoes up to hit the high note perfectly, and an older woman behind them smiles.

“You’re adorable,” the woman says fondly. “I wish my son and daughter got along as well as you two.” She beams at them, and Eddie grins back. “Yeah, my sister’s pretty awesome,” he tells her, pride and admiration in his voice. “She hates my taste in music, though. Can’t imagine why.” The woman bursts out laughing, Max laughing right along with her. Eddie simply resumes picking out candy, as if he hasn’t done anything out of the ordinary.

Like to read more? With a Little Help From My Friends

[fox-guardian]

man this sucks (<- likes a niche character that hardly has any fan content)

[charliemwrites]

(Re)organized Crime, Part 8!

I was going to wait a little longer to post this (I say, looking guiltily at the queue) but I felt bad leaving it on a cliff hanger!

Content: Attempted Breaking and Entering, Fear for Safety, Hurt/Comfort

Four months ago, Simon drove you home for the first time.

It was a bad week all around. On Monday, Soap broke his arm. Gaz left with Farah and Alex on Tuesday for a business trip on the other side of the country. Wednesday brought about two dozen emails from Philip Graves’ wretched assistant, ugly pastel green borders framing each one. By Thursday, you almost weren’t surprised by the call about a lost shipment.

You were surprised when Price raised his voice at you, though.

“The fuck do you mean it’s missing?” he snarled.

You stood across from him with your tablet in hand, grossly unorganized logs open onscreen.

“I don’t think there are other ways I could mean it,” you answered lightly. “The crates left port and didn’t show up at the next one.”

You were scribbling on the screen, compiling the log into something more comprehensive. Purposefully not making eye contact because you could feel the angry heat radiating off him. It was making your hands tremble, but you’d be damned if you let it show.

“Well then where the fuck are they?” he demanded.

“If I knew that, sir, they wouldn’t be missing.”

“Are you taking the fucking piss?”

At that, you let out a heavy breath and looked up, expression flat. Price’s expression was dark, mouth tight. One hand gripped the arm of his office chair while the index finger of the other tap, tap, tapped his desk. You stared him down for a moment, reminding yourself to breathe with each uneven beat of your heart. Waited through a count of 20 before he huffed.

“Just find the damn thing,” he growled.

“Shall I use my crystal ball?”

You nearly jumped a mile when he barked your name in reprimand. And that was about the time you had enough.

“John.”

He froze. Across the room, so did Simon and Soap. You were so shocked by your own outburst that you came up a bit short as well. Didn’t even have a chance to gather more words when Price’s shoulders dropped. The anger melted away, replaced with apology and self-deprecation.

“Christ, luv, I’m sorry. Where have my manners gone?”

He ran a hand down his face, pinched the bridge of his nose where you were sure a headache was brewing.

“Thank you for the apology. I know this is important,” you soothed, softening your voice. “Give me 30 minutes and I’ll have a list of people you should yell at.”

He grimaced, “Take 45 for the trouble, darling.”

You used the extra fifteen minutes to brew him a fresh cup of tea and served it with a couple pain meds. When you’d delivered the analysis, he told you to head home early, that it would be a late night regardless and there was no need for you to do more than you already had. (It hadn’t helped the way that he’d ducked his head, still sheepish. You’d squeezed his wrist as you’d dropped off a list of damned names.)

With your usual drivers gone, Soap’s arm broken, and Price out to rip several people a new one, Simon drove you home.

He scowled in the vestibule while you fumbled for your keys. Then glared at the entryway as you trudged to the elevator. He grumbled as he accepted the invitation into your apartment, only to sneer (yes, you knew he was sneering even with the mask) at the doorknob and deadbolt.

“This place is a bloody deathtrap,” he finally declared, crossing his arms.

“It’s not that bad,” you replied, shaking your head.

“One solid kick and this door is coming down.”

You arched an eyebrow. “Then don’t kick it.”

“I’m sure a robber will be polite enough to knock,” he scoffed.

“The crime rate is good in this area,” you argued. Not great, but decent enough…

“Bloody hell. Did you even – are your fucking windows unlocked?”

You blinked. “We’re on the third floor, Simon.”

“I don’t give a rats arse—”

“And stop swearing at me.”

“—that you’re on the third floor. Lock your windows.”

You rolled your eyes but faltered when he narrowed his eyes, looming in the doorway like a fussy boogeyman. A clear indication that he did not plan to leave until you complied.

“You can’t be serious!” You were not whining.

“As the fu— as the damn plague.”

You snorted. “I think ‘damn’ is still swearing.”

He didn’t deign to respond to that, just arched his eyebrows. You mirror him right back, preparing to make a snippy comment about wasting company time.

“I’m sure Price would agree,” he said as you opened your mouth. You shut it with a snap.

Smug bastard.

You groaned but made a show of padding to all the windows and clicking the latches shut. Even when into the bedroom to secure those too. When you were done, he grunted in satisfaction and turned for the door.

“Lock this too.”

“I will, I will, I’m not dumb.”

You scrunched your nose at the skeptical grunt you received that time.

Before leaving, he pointed at you again, eyes narrowed. “Lock. Them. All.”

“They are!”

“From now on.”

“Yes, Simon.”

If you survive this episode of Dateline you’ve found yourself in, you owe him a scone and those nice cigarettes he pretends he doesn’t smoke.

“Open th’ fuckin’ door, Bunny!”

Your fingers twitch around the hilt of the knife. It’s not a big one, but it is serrated. That’s not going in or out without some serious damage. If not the fatal kind, at least the messy kind. Brandon’s not doing anything to you without leaving a crime scene investigator’s wet dream behind.

“Bunnyyyyyyyy!”

The banging starts again, nearly as fast as your heart. You could swear it gets louder every time. Maybe it’s just getting closer, layers of wood chipping away, closing the already too-small distance between you.

You glance desperately at your phone, but the screen remains damningly dark. Price promised he’d be here soon, but it feels like hours since you hung up to preserve what little battery life you had left. Your stomach churns as the pounding turns to thicker, harder thumps. Throwing his body into the door again, trying to force entry. Simon’s mutterings about kicking the door echo in your head.

You should have listened.

“Bun—fuck!”

You jolt as something slams into the door, nearly taking it (and the entry table you braced against it) down. There’s scuffling and scraping, muffled shouting, rapid footsteps— then silence. You hold your breath, every muscle in your body wound tight enough to snap.

“It’s alright now.”

You lurch from your protective crouch in the hallway, shove clumsily at the table. The mangled front door swings in crooked on one hinge, cracked and splintered from top to bottom.

And John is there on the other side.

You’re not sure if he reaches for you or if you throw yourself into his arms. All that matters is that he’s clutching you tight to his broad chest, tucking your head beneath his chin. Safe, protected. Your head spins as you lean into him, knowing that he’ll support you. His heart is beating hard against your cheek.

“John,” you breathe, now that fear isn’t squeezing your lungs in a vice.

“I’m here, luv,” he murmurs into your hair.

You’re shaking. Adrenaline seeps from your bones, takes all their heat and steel with it. You’re left cold and feeble in the aftermath, fingertips numb as they curl tight into his shirt. You don’t know where the knife is; you don’t care. You don’t need it now.

“H-He… He…” you start.

John shushes you, squeezes a bit tighter in reassurance. He knows; you don’t need to tell him, don’t have to remind yourself of what could have happened.

“Where…?” you try instead, but words are so hard. All the trembling must have knocked your voice loose, lost somewhere in the pit of your stomach.

“Soap and Gaz are taking care of it,” John says.

The last of the tension drains away. Your boys will scare Brandon off, maybe enough that he won’t ever bother you again. (The thought alone makes your eyes burn.) John is here now, and – when you peek out from around his bicep – so is Simon.

“You were right,” you mumble, “a-about the door.”

Simon winces. “I’m sorry that I was.”

Somehow, that’s what finally bursts the bubble of your restraint. You sob. It’s loud and sniffly and ugly. In the back of your mind, the part that can never just let you rest, you’re mortified to be doing this in front of your coworker. And on your boss’s nice shirt too. You have an image to maintain—

Except John’s broad hand is rubbing soothing circles into your lower back. He’s gathering you even closer, letting you shelter in his warmth and strength. Easing you through hiccups with quiet murmurs, telling you he’s proud and that you did so well to call him.

Through tears, you see Simon reach out. Scarred knuckles run gently down your wet cheek.

“We take care of our own, little miss.”

You warble out a broken little “Simoooon” that seems to break the solemn atmosphere, John sighing against your temple and Simon’s shoulders slumping in what might be fondness.

It’s not long before Soap and Gaz return, looking no worse for wear, thankfully. (Not that you think they can’t handle themselves – but Brandon was drunk and who knows if he had a weapon or not. Accidents happen.)

“Aw, lass,” Soap coos when he sees you. Calmer now, but still sniffling and wiping at stray tears. “He’s gone now. Won’ be botherin’ you again.”

You blink at the fresh blood on his knuckles and don’t ask. You believe him.

“Thank you.”

“Nothin’ to thank us for, doll. Should have taken care of ‘im earlier,” Gaz replies.

“Earlier?” John asks. He’s trying for your sake, you can tell, but you know him too well to miss the sharp note in his voice.

“Hadn’t had a chance to debrief, sir,” Gaz explains regretfully.

You untuck your face from John’s chest to be better heard, clearing your throat. “Still, for all four of you to come here…”

“What else would we do, sit with our thumbs up our bums?” Soap teases.

“That’ll do,” Simon snips, but you giggle anyway.

It doesn’t take much to convince you to leave your apartment – it takes a bit more to convince you to go to John’s. Unfortunately, you’re outnumbered, and while that normally wouldn’t be a problem, you’re not in a headspace to be stubborn, argumentative, or superficially brave.

All the boys have bachelor pads ill-suited to guests, especially on short notice. Maybe on some other night, under different circumstances, you would have insisted on a hotel.

But the idea of being alone in an unfamiliar place makes your skin crawl. You don’t want to be alone. You want to be near John.

“We take care of our own,” Simon said – so you let them.

Gaz, Soap, and Simon help to pack you an overnight bag, scattering to different corners of your apartment to collect items. In the meantime, you keep clinging to John because he keeps letting you. Exhaustion creeps at the edges of your mind, doubling gravity on your slumping shoulders.

“Did I interrupt something important?” you ask finally, voice hoarse.

“No, luv. Just a card game with some old friends. Soap was losing anyway.”

You sigh, relieved. At least you don’t have the loss of some important business deal weighing on your conscience.

“Poker again?”

“Kid can’t keep a straight face for the life of him.”

You hide your smile against his shoulder and appreciate the chuckle you feel more than hear in his chest.

Simon takes the lead out of the building while Gaz and Soap bring up the rear. You’re a bit self-conscious of any neighbors seeing you in this state, but thankfully none make an appearance. It’s too late in the evening for anyone to be coming in or leaving, and if there were any witnesses to Brandon’s bullshit, you never saw (or heard) them.

(“The hell is their problem, actin’ like they didnae hear that bawbag?” Soap grumbles. “Bystander effect,” you answer, shrugging. He grimaces in understanding, but still looks pissed.)

The car is warm when John bundles you into the back seat. Soap takes the wheel, Simon the passenger side. Gaz sits on your other side and leans his knee gently into yours.

“It’s over now, doll, you can rest. We won’t let anythin’ happen t’you,” he promises.

You smile wearily, lean in to drop a grateful kiss on his cheek.

“Don’t know what I’d do without you four,” you sigh as you snuggle into John’s side again.

“Don’t need to,” Simon answers gruffly, “we’re not goin’ anywhere.”

John hums in agreement, low and pleasant by your ear.

“You always take such good care of us,” he murmurs. Quiet, just for the two of you. “Let us return the favor for once, won’t you, darling?”

You want to resist. You should. You drop your head to his shoulder and sigh, “Okay.”

Between the gentle motion of the car and the pattering of a fresh rainstorm, you don’t stay awake for long. You nod off within four blocks of your apartment, peacefully unaware of the dazed and bloody body in the trunk.

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[creelson]

[Famous Boyband] x Y/N Wattpad Styled fic, where Y/N describes in 1st person POV how fragile she is and how hard her life is before the boyband of her dream comes and rescues her, NEVER disappoints, not even in the year of our lord 2024