#who is not only an unreliable but also someone out of the relationship

[mrsoftthoughts]

One day more on my goal to not acknowledge The Sun and The star as canon ( the worst part of this thing is that it is official content)

[prideprejudce]

I think alot more people would enjoy the show if they learned to see Rhaenyra and Alicent as Unreliable Narrators, and characters who are supposed to have glaring flaws and weaknesses.

Mandatory preface- There are Issues™️ with season 2 that are its own other ask- but the complaints ive seen about character assassination on both women kind of tells me ppl just wanted to see the two just GirlBossing around, not being tragic characters trapped in their own circumstances.

For Alicent specifically- she just isn't written to be Cersei 2.0, and while it was really interesting to see motherhood from cersei's point of view, its already been done!! I actually prefer seeing Alicent's mercurial clinging to and abandoning motherhood- its interesting!! She was made a mother at what- 15? An age where you truly arent mentally developed enough to raise 3 kids, AND be a child bride, AND be a queen, (AND be a lesbian).

Alicent is interesting to me because she's stunted at 15 years old, she's an adult woman who talks to and sometimes bullies her kids as if they are her peers, and is obsessed with her childhood crush(es). She hasn't built any new relationships* past the ones she was entangled with as a teenager, she's obsessed with both acting out to make SOMEONE see that shes suffering, (she's honestly pretty blatant for someone who prides themselves on being the Temperate Voice of Reason) but also to erase herself and reset to before she had to marry the king, before aemma died.

I think most of her 'bad out of character' decisions are just these two impulses winning out, her trying to force a reset, go back to a time where none of this had happened yet, when things were simpler and she had love and every day wasn't the worst day of her life™️.

She sleeps with cole, the man she thought was pretty at 15 (her last uncomplicated attraction just before it all went wrong and aemma died) -she doesnt seem to like it that much, but she does seem compelled to seek him out, esp when upset- shes obsessed with, and desperate to reconnect with Rhaenyra, her childhood best friend (and first love) and get back to where they were as kids, AND she still treats and asks her father for absolution as if he's still the only authority that matters to her just like she did at 15. Alot of her 'victim complex/bewildered they took it so far' behaviour in the plotting of rhaenyra's usurption reads to me like a teenager in over her head, she talked big game and now its real and shes panicking!! She's tragic BECAUSE she's still a teenager- so stunted shes unable to meaningfully grow up and learn to make healthier choices for herself, or move on and stop trying to grasp at the 'if i could just go back' urge.

As a mother, I think this creates an interesting dynamic as well, and I do like that in the casting even, she seems closer in age to her kids than rhaenyra does to hers. I think the contrast ppl are drawing with Alicent Protecting Her Kids in season1 compared to her giving them up in season two isn't bad writing to me, just massive differences in context. Sure she protected Aemond in driftmark, but we cant ignore that she probably felt humiliated by her husband choosing rhaenyra's side over hers in front of everyone, did it seem like a grown woman fighting for her son?? or a teenager furious with her ex winning one over her again? or both!! both sides twisted together is still interesting! When she protected Aegon from Rhaenys, is stepping in front of her son the king to protect him from the enemies dragon fire not the most romantic daydream of a deserving death a child bride could come up with?? Was it the impulse to protect the son she couldnt decide if she loved or hated, or was it to have the most heroic death possible to escape the reality that she sees coming. And if Rhaenyra hears about how Brave she was in the face of a dragons maw, and cries about it forever and feels sooo bad and regrets it til the day she dies, thats an added bonus. I think Alicent loves her kids, but is teenager selfish about HOW she loves and protects her kids, and is unable to be a mature, consistant, protective mother to them when she also sees them as having ruined her life. I think in season 2 when she 'gives them up' shes relieved, and once again following the compulsion of 'if i reset to when Rhaenyra was heir, i had no sons, and i wasn't married or queen, everything will be better'. I think theres complexity to it, i think she does love her sons and feels insane about it, but I think Alicent has been trying to Go Back in more and more Intense ways ever since she got married, and we might be giving her sanity more credit than it deserves when it comes to the need to wipe the board clean and go back to being 15.

hey anon are you trying to get married to me or what

[chefkids]

Claire is the physical manifestation of Carmy’s avoidance.

Before he got locked in the fridge Carmy chose to prioritize Sydney over Claire. But at Friends & Family night he ended up picking Claire over Sydney because he was being pressured by Richie and his avoidance kicked in again. This resurfaced his NYC Chef trauma, because Claire was a distraction to getting Sydney her star and the general success of The Bear. Then he tried to over compensate by turning into NYC chef all of a sudden and freaking out at Sydney. Because he wants to get Sydney a star but he’s also terrified of failing and having the NYC Chef “win” and wants to succeed out of spite for how he made him feel.

He left Sydney at Kasama to be with Claire because it was the easier choice for him than to put himself out there and be vulnerable with Sydney. Then he left her to go to that party with Claire and ended up having the Fishes Christmas panic attack. He left Sydney to cook for Claire, then ended up with the alleyway panic attack about Claire and Fishes. He left Syd at service for Claire and ended up with the NYC Chef panic attack then locked himself in the fridge and he is mainly concerned with Sydney and the staff through flashbacks. Using Claire as a distraction from Sydney always comes with a cost. And it always brings up the root cause of his avoidance which is his mother and the NYC Chef.

Carmy promised Sydney that he would not leave her alone after the fridge. And while he physically has not left her alone to be with Claire. He never mentally left Claire. 

Sydney suggested he should make a call after he got out of the fridge, and he thought she was referring to Claire instead of Richie, who is his actual 'family' and who he really hurt with his words. He apologized but in the most generic way possible and Richie knew he was just doing it to get it out of the way, which is why they're still fighting. He's still using Claire to avoid confronting his emotions for people like Richie and Sydney, who he knows he has hurt but who he really cares about. Sydney didn't give Carmy "permission" to call Claire then. He needed Sydney's push in his relationship just to call Claire his girlfriend. He thinks not talking to Claire equals prioritizing Sydney, but in turn he is still prioritizing Claire only just in his head, not physically, because he is still using Claire as an avoidance tool for his feelings for Sydney, his lack of apology for Richie, and even his lack of confrontation with his mother. 

In Season 3 we see him happy and panic free in Claire flashbacks. Because she is in a romanticized version of his past. We know he can be an unreliable narrator and see things that aren't fully there or twist things, and his flashbacks to his relationship with Claire is not the full picture. He's not thinking about all the times that being with her led to a panic attack after. He is using her to be avoidant of Sydney and what she means to him and what doing all of this for Sydney means.

He can't really answer Nat or Sydney when they ask “Why are you doing this?” because he’s still in denial about what he is really feeling for Sydney. But he can answer that he feels guilt whenever someone brings up Claire because that is easier to address.

Carmy is an avoidant. In Season 1 he oscillated between avoiding dealing with his actual grief about Mikey by just focusing on the restaurant and avoiding dealing with what was growing between him and Sydney by using the restaurant and his grief for Mikey, until it blew up in his face. He physically avoided the restaurant itself Season 2 because he needed to avoid his feelings for Sydney, but still projected his feelings for her onto Claire by doing everything Sydney enjoys with Claire until it blew up in his face with a panic attack about the two of them.

Then in Season 3 he couldn't physically avoid Sydney, so he mentally avoided her by trying to reframe his relationship with Claire as something joyful and carefree and peaceful. When we all know that the reality of it was something else. He tells the Fak's he can't apologize because it's too hard. He's avoiding apologizing to Claire for many other reasons too. Cause if he does he'll have to address the fact that Claire said she loved him, which I really don't think he loves her back like that. He'll have to face the real version of Claire and his relationship with her; which was not all sunshine and butterflies. It was filled with panic attacks and anxiety. So he'd rather live in a romanticized version of her in his head, missing her and filling his thoughts with her instead of Sydney, than face what was actually going on.

Sydney is still his muse. He slipped into thinking about Sydney that night by making a dish about her and by inviting her to go to Ever with him. He made that dish that was blatantly inspired by her standing right in front of him. He has been avoiding talking to her, and he clearly wanted to say more, but didn't know how or what to say.

Once Sydney left he started hearing the music from his time in the fridge, he threw the dish out and immediately started to spiral. He stared at the bar cart with party items for Richie's Tuesday Surprise. aka the Amusement and Enjoyment. Which is what he was trying to find with Sydney that day he had planned an inspirational food tour with her, but ended up ditching her for Claire at Kasama. And what he told himself he no longer needed in order to focus on getting Sydney a star.

He stands outside the fridge then Strange Currencies starts playing very quietly under the fridge music, "I don't know why you're mean to me When I call on the telephone." He then goes inside the fridge and "I don't know what you mean to me. And I don't know what you mean to me But I want to turn you on, turn you up, figure you out I wanna take you on" plays a little bit louder, which is basically what his deal with Sydney is right now. He doesn't know what she really means to him. He knows she calms him down and inspires him, but he doesn't ever say what that means to him out loud. Then it grows louder with "These words, "You will be mine""

Then he reached for his phone to try and call Claire. Because he's trying to drown out the song with Claire. The first time we heard it was when he first saw Claire by the fridge and once he rejected her, aka when he chose Sydney, the song got louder. Then when he wanted to take Claire to the restaurant, aka where Sydney was, after the party it played again. He knew it was for sure about Sydney from the panic attack, because with Claire it was backwards, she was his past, but with Sydney it was moving forward.

When he's debating pressing call to Claire, the fridge music overpowers Strange Currencies, because Claire is what keeps him frozen in the past and "haunted" by it. He practices saying sorry as the songs grow louder trying to drown each other out, and we see a clip of present day Claire working and Strange Currencies stops playing.

Then a flash of her in The Bear sitting on the garde manger aka cold prep, which was the same clip we saw of her when he was thinking about her when he was locked in the fridge, Strange Currencies plays again over it. He is still stuck on it even though she's moving on and living her life. Strange Currencies grows louder because he keeps trying to convince himself the song is for Claire and reverts back to the past when he thought it was for her that night he took her to see the kitchen.

Claire's I really love you voicemail plays. Then it cuts to who else but Sydney. I really love you. aka I really love *you*. Sydney. What he is actually thinking but avoiding. What stops Carmy is fearful avoidance, because Claire Sydney is so great she scares the shit out of him.

[arcadiabaytornado]

Max Caulfield is an unreliable narrator. The game provides many examples of Max saying/thinking something that isn't particularly true, such as Max swearing up and down that she's a loner who might as well be invisible to her classmates.

We see a lot of evidence to dispute this idea. While she might not have as many friends as someone like Dana does, she's only been at Blackwell for a month, and she's already made three friends. We see in texts that Max and Kate have gotten tea together a few times, and it's implied that she hangs out with Warren during science class. She also seems to friends with Dana, though we get less details about that relationship.

Most of her other classmates know who she is as well. They address her by name, and most of them speak to her like this isn't their first conversation. They may not know her well, sure, but Max a has only been at Blackwell a month. The fact that so many people are familiar with her show that she's not nearly as much of an invisible loner as she thinks she is.

There's a few other things that back this up: A: Max has 81 friends on her social media profile. That's a pretty big number. B: Max has made an arch enemy in Victoria after only being at school for a few weeks. C: She's left an impression on Stella and Taylor even though it's said that she's never really spoke to either of them before the events of the game.

Max is an unreliable narrator. She's a good example someone who has a perspective of themselves that necessarily translate into reality, and she's also a good example that we're often much harsher on ourselves than other people are. She thinks no notices her, but most of Blackwell seem to think of her fondly. It's a good reminder that people don't get themselves from a 3rd person view, and if we did, there's a good chance a lot of the negative perceptions we have about ourselves would look differently in another light.

[throwaway-yandere]

𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙣𝙤 𝙙𝙞𝙜𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙮 (Yandere!Neuvillette/Reader)

a/n: this was inspired by my favorite childhood TV show, House MD & Oedipus Rex. The plot was supposed to be something else but dingleaf happened one 4AM ago. Anyways, welcome to our first Throwaway-Thursday this End of Year Blues!!!

Unreliable Synopsis: Everyone held their breath when they heard ex-defense attorney (Y/n) say these words: "Your Honor, I would like to challenge Champion Duelist Clorinde to clear my charges."

CW: yandere themes, reader has so much spite I can fry an egg, hurt/NO COMFORT. Please prioritize your mental health if these CWs are triggering to you. (Note: The plot happens a month before the Fontaine AQ, so he doesn't know about what happened to Vautrin.)

“Why the pale expression? Has the trial last week caused you tremendous pain?”

"Such pallor is caused by pity, not grief.” Neuvilette made his fragile excuse to reassure Furina, but the words did not reach her ears. The ringing of raindrops outside was louder, more convincing. Fontaine is vexed with storms near-daily. The sad verdant earth will soon sponge and dry the hydro dragon’s tears as always, but every man hopes they won’t drown first. 

At first, he was convinced what he harbored was pity. For the pessimists, Fontaine is a nation where virtuous pagans paraded themselves as rich and devoted ran amok. Absolute justice is a cartoonish ideal– lack of entertainment is the death sentence. 

Lady Furina was starting to believe he lives his life by a certain suspect’s final envoi: 

Count no man happy till he dies, free of pain at last.

"Are you insane?!" Navia held your shoulders, eyes wide. 

This was the worst thing you could ever do to your best friend. 

"Maybe I am." You told her, chuckling slightly as your thumbs caressed the nerves behind her palms. Navia, as intimidating as her occupation was, never once gripped you this hard. 

You wish you could hug her fully.

But these prison bars are holding you back.

"Can you blame me, Nav?"

"Don't." She glared. "Don't do this."

Navia trembled.

"Please, don't follow Dad..."

The blonde woman was reduced to a young, hopeless girl. You saw a reflection of the small Navia who lost Callas, and that short glimpse was stretched into a whole tragic spectacle. 

"I'm begging you, (Y/n). Please… d-don't go away. Don't leave me too…"

This was the cruelest you've ever been to someone you love.

But also the kindest you've been to yourself.

"There's nothing else I can do, Nav."

"W-We can always do something! There must be a way!" She screamed gutturally. "We'll find a way to make that Chief Justice pay instead. If there's a will—"

"But there's none. There is no will in me left."

"Then hold on to mine, for Archon's sake! Depend on me!"

"What for? We both lack the means to grasp our Archon's hand." You shook your head, grinning without life. 

You wiped the tears off her cheeks. In a small fraction of time, you trembled, showing a bit of soul.

"Our Goddess has abandoned me. Everyone and everything but you had." You said. "Dear Navia, don't make this harder for yourself. Let me go."

"(Y/n)..."

Her grip relaxed.

Navia finally let go.

But that was not the scene's last word.

Clorinde sprinted towards your cell, seething in electric rage. Navia stepped back. Their relationship might be less than cordial, but Clorinde was also your friend.

And after all these years of friendship, she never would've guessed you would elicit such melancholic frustration within her.

She knows she'll come out of this duel victorious.

She knows if she doesn't say a word, she'll be the one to bury you six feet under.

Clorinde's fists clenched and her breathing grew harsh and difficult, unable to accept your inhumane gaze.

"Is this your solution, (Y/n)?"

From the tone of her voice, this would not be a pleasant conversation. One wrong word, and you'll see a side of the Champion Duelist not even her court opponents knew.

You nodded.

"Yes."

"State your reason."

"Because this is the only way I'll die with dignity."

…

"Die… with dignity?"

Something inside her cracked.

"Yes." You nodded again, becoming uncertain. "At least with this, there would be something Neuvillette cannot decide for me. And (Y/n) (L/n) chooses a dignified death."

“DEATH HAS NO DIGNITY!!!” 

You and Navia flinched at the sudden sound.

Clorinde screamed, feeling her eyes burn. Her veins became more prominent in her face and her skin reddish. The sheer force of her scream was enough to bring your full attention to her, yet to the duelist, her uncharacteristic outburst meant nothing.

“DEATH WILL ALWAYS BE UGLY!!! DEATH– DEATH IS NEVER BEAUTIFUL!!! IT IS ALWAYS SINISTER— LOATHSOME AND VILE.”

"Clor—"

She pulled you by your collar.

“There– there is only dignity in living.” She trembled, casting her gaze down. “You can live with dignity– but you can’t die with it.”

For a while, only her unsteady breathing could be heard.

Clorinde eventually calmed down, her heavy sighs and frantic pants slowing as the red hue of her face somewhat returned to its usual pale complexion. She couldn’t afford a second more to process her growing grief.

"Find another duelist."

As a successor to the Marechaussee Hunters, there's no one else you need but her.

"But I want you."

"(Y/n)."

"You've always been my idol, Clorinde." You told her solemnly. "I always thought you at least made my clients have a clean death under your blade."

Clorinde paused.

That, she cannot deny. 

She did spare mercy to the people you defended. But she doesn't understand how you fail to comprehend why she couldn't bear to bring herself to enact the same reprieve for you.

"Retrieve your gloves. I don't and I won't accept your challenge." Clorinde closed her eyes. "Live your days in the Fortress instead. Death is not the solution."

You laughed. As if you'd let yourself be under Wriothesley's guidance when you can smell from miles away that he's one of Neuvillette's lap dogs.

"Isn't this suffering enough?" You spoke with a casual lack of self-preservation. "I don't want to live under Neuvillette's scrutinizing eyes. Not anymore."

You looked up.

That empty smile was no longer on your face.

And that was somehow more frightening than it should be.

"So do your job as a champion and end it all, just like what you've done to Uncle Callas and the others."

Your last conversation with the Duke was not as memorable as when he caught you spiking the Iudex’s cup, yet you’d give his personality credit where it is due. His was certainly a memorable one.

Wriothesley stood a few steps away from the bars while you purposefully cornered yourself. The distance was noticeable. It was clear that neither of you was close to each other. This was mere formality brought about by one of your should’ve-been victims.

“So, you sure don’t want to be roommates?” Wriothesley asked. "Or you know, see old friends and family down there?"

"I'd rather not disappoint them with my presence."

“So, you're a coward?" He asked, intending to provoke you.

"Maybe?" you answered, mimicking his tone. "Wouldn't know. Last time I checked, I was an honorable defense attorney. But suddenly, the Iudex had a change of heart."

"Neuvillette didn't have a change of heart. You are a terrorist."

You laughed sardonically, "suppose so."

You both weren't entirely wrong. Friends and foe alike know you've turned to rebellion after the justice system had failed you repeatedly. Neuvillette's lovestruck fixation was merely the final straw.

“You’re walking on a death sentence.”

“No shit,” you clicked your tongue and continued. “What else do you think this is for?”

“The Iudex was convinced that you’re acting out because you had a guilty conscience, and he’s very willing to drop those charges and forgive you.”

“Guilty conscience?! HA!!!” You laughed. “As if I felt guilty for what I’ve done. If anything, I’m rejoicing.”

Wriothesley smirked, but it faded quickly.

“I told him the same, but then he says if that were true, you’re probably just masking it to play the villain’s part.”

“Do you believe every word he says?”

“No,” Wriothesley did not hesitate to answer. “I know a criminal when I see one. And I also know when a criminal can get away with their mess.”

“The jury thinks otherwise– the oratrice cannot be wrong.” You snickered. “I’m as guilty as they come, hands filled with arsenic and all.”

"You can still get out of this. Sure, you'll get a stern talking-to— a lecture on the virtue of honor and respect. But in the end, he'd give you a second chance. He's still hoping that a mutual agreement will arise in the end."

You expressed your disinterest with a droopy-eyed “Blah, blah, blah…”

Wriothesley frowned.

“You’ll make him depressed.”

You raised an eyebrow. 

“And you think I care? Fontaine can flood next month. Just as long as I die tomorrow it’s none of my business.”

…

“Well, it’s your call,” Wriothesley said. “If you’re willing to throw your life away like that, then you probably wouldn’t survive a week underwater.”

He wrapped a hand around one of the bars.

“You know, (Y/n),” the Duke looked at you dead in the eye. “Marriage with the Iudex isn’t as bad as you’re making it out to be.”

You laughed.

“What makes you say that?” You smiled through gritted teeth. “Are you his second spouse?”

“I’m just saying,” he shrugged. “You could’ve just lived a bit more silently.”

You glared. 

“Are you saying I should live like a caged bird? That I should accept that our system here is rigged?”

“I’m saying you should’ve been more grateful with what you have.”

You scoffed.

“Wow.”

An awkward silence followed after. It wasn’t as if a quip was hard to form– but the historical context behind whom you were speaking to made weighing empathy over spite a challenge. You knew of his past, his name or lack thereof, and quiet allegiance to Neuvillette. Sigewinne had made sure you knew of it to glorify the adoptive “father” of the Melusines. Wriothesley owes him his survival.

But "Wriothesley" of all people should've known that those who know morbid truths cannot be silenced forever. 

And Neuvillette owes you a peaceful death. 

… The Duke sighed, noticing that his admiration for the Iudex did not align with his current morals.

“We’ll forever agree to disagree on this, won’t we?” He asked.

“Hopefully not forever, I don’t want to stay here for much longer.”

Wriothesley chuckled at your morbid joke. But before he could walk away with a less-than-heavy heart, you shifted from your corner.

“Hey, Wriothesley?”

He turned to look at you– your hand specifically.

It’s a letter.

“Mind handing these to the authorities?”

Wriothesley’s eyes widened.

“Is that–”

“It’s a written confession,” you chuckled. “Don’t ask me how I got a pen and paper. I know that damn bastard forbids anyone to lend me anything that’ll help me write a final will. Gotta say, at least his etiquette lessons had some use. At least my last words are in pretty cursive.”

He didn’t say another word. 

…

The Duke left the room, empty-handed.

…

No one wants to see the Iudex more heartbroken than he already is now.

The interrogation room was small, but not to the point that there was a minimal budget for its construction. You sat on one end behind the glass divider after one of the guards took your letter. There were only plain walls and two lightbulbs on the ceiling. At the center of the room is a table with two chairs on either side, no pen or paper. 

Nothing but an empty table. 

But the quiet comfort was gone when the man of the hour closed the door behind him. As the ticking of the clock becomes more softer, the two individuals would be forced to sit for the duration of this “interrogation.”

It was none other than your husband, the Iudex, the Chief Justice of Fontaine, and the bane of your existence.

Monsieur Neuvillette.

His back was straight; his eyes, “stern” and focused. He clasped his hands together, fingers intertwined. His gaze searched for something— regret, remorse, anything that could make the upcoming nightmare disappear. 

Neuvillette's voice was “calm” and “collected.” 

But you didn’t buy it. Not with his messy hair, his forlorn look, his frown. You rarely saw him cry. You had a gut feeling he hides it by standing amidst heavy rain, but this time the redness of his eyes and puffiness of his cheeks says it all.

It’s a heavy downpour outside. 

He can’t be bothered to hide his tears from the public eye anymore.

"In your own words, please explain why you had attempted to poison me."

Your eyes lit up. He immediately wished he could take those words back. 

So, he’s still in denial. Neuvillette seriously didn’t think you wrote the letter. He probably didn’t think it was your handwriting. It was almost insulting.

“Oh, Monsieur! You are as generous as they say, finally letting your spouse speak for themselves!” You grinned sarcastically. “And they say chivalry is dead! DEAD!!!”

He cringed at your pointed enthusiasm.

You recount the day you attempted to murder him, describing how you had slipped the poison into his favorite cup. How you didn’t really care to hope it wouldn’t be noticed since what mattered more to you was his death over your own freedom. The more detailed you became, the more it suffocated him.

“But, as you can see, you’re alive and I am behind this glass window,” you tapped the divider. “Away from you, at last.”

He bit his lip.

“(Y/n)—”

“I hate you.”

He breathed in shakily.

“I know.”

“And yet you still fell for it.” Your voice suddenly softened. 

“Why?” You continued. “Why did you believe my act for the past month? I know you had your suspicions, so why? You knew I was just playing along to get your guard down– to act like some loving housewife so I can find the opportunity to smother you with a pillow– so… why?”

“Maybe…”

Neuvillette took a deep breath.

“Maybe it’s because dying by your hands would be a dignified way to go.”

Your eyes widened. The air turned to glue. Breathing became a challenge.

He looked up, meeting your gaze. Monsieur Neuvillette was serious. No shifting position can make you feel comfortable. 

Because Neuvillette in his most sincere form of speech is the most brutal.

“I just wished to be loved by y-you,” his voice cracked. “Even for a moment, even for a lie, I would die to know I was loved by you.”

His face crumpled, tears flowing freely. He reached a hand out against the glass window, his palm marking the divider. Neuvillette was breathing erratically, desperate to hold you. The pain in his chest was getting heavier, much like the rain outside. You almost couldn’t hear him from all the background noise, and you wished that was what happened. 

This was the man who took your clients' happiness. The man who took Uncle Callas away with his rationale. The reason for your unhappiness.

And yet, you couldn't think of any other person who would love you as much as he does. 

“Y-You know me for who I-I am,” he gasped out. “I am but a weak and beaten down man w-who couldn’t express himself like a human being. Y-You were there, you comforted me with not a smile, an umbrella, or thoughtless words of encouragement— you accepted me for who I was with a warm embrace.” 

You hated it. 

You hate how your heart ached for the man that made your life a living hell.

“I was the leader of the Revolution and I needed intel against you, nothing more.” You spat. This time, you were the least convincing one. “It was an act of kindness I shouldn’t have done.”

“Yet it has helped me more than you had accounted for.”

“And never before have I ever regretted playing savior.”

“I was merely attempting to reform your life,” Neuvillette breathlessly spoke. “I wished to set you on the right path. You were a gifted individual with great connections. Your peers had high expectations of you. For you to throw that away for nonsense activism— no— terrorism is heartbreaking. And I—”

Neuvillette gulped.

“I didn’t want to face you on the other side of the courtroom.”

You laughed.

“Some things are just fated to happen,” you said. “An old astrologist told me that. She told me I was bound to get myself in deep legal trouble. Growing up, I figured it might as well be a cause worth doing if it’ll lead me to that path eventually. Why else did I become a defense attorney in such a hellishly political land?”

He trembled, tears falling at a faster rate.

You almost wanted to reach out and wipe those tears away.

Almost.

“Must you treat your life as though it is disposable?” Neuvillette asked, choking slightly. “Why are you…”

You digressed. “You’re not going to retract those charges are you?”

“I did.”

You frowned.

“But Lady Furina would not allow it,” he shook, frustrated. “She found out about your past, your hatred for her so-called incompetences and published lese-majestes.”

“Good for her, good for her.”

Neuvillette’s hand slowly slid down.

“I can’t… I cannot watch this…”

You felt a surge of confidence, for Neuvillette was indeed devoid of hope. You've never seen him with his head hung low. What went through Neuvillette's mind remained uncertain. Perhaps, just a small piece of him knew you could never be his. Perhaps he knew that you were destined for a doomed fate.

But it doesn't matter. 

All that mattered was that you were free.

That was a month ago.

The rain had been going on nonstop for thirty days, and the Hydro Archon had every right to worry. 

“I can’t sleep…” Neuvillette thought he spoke out loud, but it was just a whisper. He’s growing weak, his sleep deprivation catching up to him.

“Then come lay your head down,” she yawned slightly, fanning her breath. “Such heavy thoughts need a place to rest.”

“An irresistible offer,” Neuvillette mused humorlessly. “But I must decline.”

“Oh Neuvillette, when will you relax from this role you carry?” The archon spoke rhetorically.

Neuvillette chuckled sadly.

The heavy downpour wouldn’t stop. 

Perhaps…

Perhaps when the day comes and he is stripped of dignity.

Maybe then, he’ll have his rest.

Neuvillette had already forgotten why he was crying that fateful day. But in those memories, he recalls he was callow and unformed. Was it due to an unfavorable trial? The problem evades him. His recollection remains only in how the people reacted around him. Many asked if he was okay and he'd reply with a simple "I'm fine". And he was, until he could no longer convince himself with that lie. He was certain he was about to dip his toes in another cycle of nihilism.

And then you came.

“Monsieur Neuvillette?”

The rain was pouring out in the cemetery. You were there; your presence questionable. He knew that you arrived intending to probe whether or not he was a sovereign dragon, but he gave you the nod of acknowledgment.

“Greetings, Mx. (Y/n),” he answered, “I trust you’ve been well? Is there a person whom you’re visiting?”

He asked in sheer politeness despite knowing your motivations.

“...”

You frowned.

“How long?”

“Pardon?”

“How long have you been carrying that loneliness, Monsieur?” You asked, voice louder. “How long?”

His lip quivered.

“Centuries, perhaps,” the Iudex thought he could pass it off as a light joke to catch you off-guard, but it came off as too sincere. “I do not keep track.”

You cautiously and awkwardly approached Neuvillette, and without a word, wrapped your arms around him in a comforting embrace.

Just like what Uncle Callas had done for you before.

Your existence here was anathema and your words were seditious. His initial reaction was to resist because he knew you were just like Vautrin. He knew you were secretly seeking vengeance because the oratrice unfavorably judged numerous friends and family.

But he needed it. He needed this badly.

It was then that the Iudex decided that he needed you. That he will keep you.

Neuvillette cannot handle another Vautrin— he can't handle another Carole. So, he'll do it right this time. He'll keep you safe, from your illegal associations and even from yourself. 

And it was a selfish yet necessary need.

A lump formed in his throat as a tear fell, trickling down his cheek slowly. He allowed himself to melt in your hug, trembling. 

“You’re going to need all the hugs you can get if you’re planning to stay as Iudex for centuries more,” you whispered. “You’re resilient, but in this world, that solitary resilience won’t be enough, won’t it?”

Unable to maintain his stoic facade any longer, Neuvillette gripped you tighter in that embrace, his vulnerability finally resurfacing physically rather than Fontaine's rains. Surprised by his sudden tirade of sobs, you embraced him with all the warmth you could muster. At that moment, you had an epiphany. Despite the enmity of their positions, they were the same. Both of you were victims of a nation that demanded more in your assigned roles than you could bear.

“If you'd let me, I'll be the person you’d come to if you ever need a hug.” You weren’t sure if you said it as a devious plan or an act of empathy. “I wouldn’t mind. Not at all.”

You've made yourself important to him now. 

Neuvillette cannot lose you too.

As he clung to the solace you inadvertently provided, you can't help but wish you never extended that small comfort months later. Every inch given could be exploited, and when you offered him a shred of empathy, he had seized it and turned it into a mile-long advantage. The vulnerability shared in that hug was the dangerous crack in the sword you've worked so hard to maintain.

And so, when the time came you faced Champion Duelist Clorinde with it, the gaps broke the sword completely and with its death came soon the end of your life.

She was right. There is no dignity in dying with a broken hilt.

But there was peace.

And as much as you hated Neuvillette, you wish he’d have it too.

"I've made it this far, and all I've ever done was in accordance with what fate and others wanted of me. In my demise, let me do something for myself." “After all, I’ve learned from watching Uncle Callas when he fought Champion Duelist Clorinde— an encounter I’ll surely experience in the next few days— that there is beauty in the end. In his last moments, my much younger self saw what expression he wore.” “He was content. The most content I had ever seen in someone's face.” “It was then that I had an epiphany. One that I hope my “husband” Neuvillette will remember, and I care not if it will bring him comfort or pain.” “What I learned was simple:” “Count no man happy till he dies, free of pain at last.”

Taglist (lmk if you want to be added on the other three fics!): @ayadikreino @kireeen, @pebblemacaroon, @thelostpanta, @vennnnn-diagram, @sagekun, @vadelma-yatta, @detectivei @sugarplumcutiepie @sunhareskies @dxprived4-starboys @unloadingdata @harmonysanreads (amen.) @atomicsoulhumanspy @sangoqueenkoko @pix-stuff @dilucragnidvr 

[intuitively-her]

First energy I'm picking up on somebody that you recently cut off or you need to. This could be someone apart of your friend group. I feel like you were put into a situation with this person that made you realize that they aren't really down for you like you thought. You made the right decision cutting them off. They are a straight up user and opportunist. Now they're pissed because they can no longer eat off your plate. They are now forced to watch you be happy from afar.

Second energy This is someone that works in the same field as you. I feel like most of you know who this is. This person tries to one-up everything you do. They might even try to dress better than you. This energy is SO immature lol. It feels very petty and tit for tat. My advice is to just ignore them. Don't give them any type of reaction because that's exactly what they want. For some of you, this person will try to extend an "olive branch" and act like they want to help you with something. DO NOT accept anything from them. They want to sabotage what you have going on.

Message from spirit📞 Stop worrying/overthinking so much about this situation. We are protecting you all the way through. Put your focus back into what matters most as you go through this transition.

Main energy This is a family member or lover. This could also be a sibling or parent maybe? I feel like y'all aren't as close as used to be. You could feel like you're outgrowing this person. They feel very rejected by you right now. This person has shown you time and time again that they are unreliable. They are jealous the love and praise that you receive from others.

Message from spirit📞 Allow this relationship to fall. You know this person cannot come with you.

First energy I'm getting strong 3rd party vibes. There is someone that feels like you have what's theirs or vice versa. I keep hearing "he/she's mine!" This is making me think of that movie "Obsession". Go watch that. Someone here recently found out that “their person” is dealing with someone else and they are PISSED.😭 This is "the other woman/man." They are mad that they no longer have access to your person. Especially if your person has money and likes to spoil/take care of you. I feel like your person was juggling you and this other individual in the past, or maybe they dated them once and things didn't work out. Regardless, this other woman/man is mad because your person chose to be with you instead. Don't pay this person any mind lol.

Second energy This is your ex. This person is lurking harddd on your socials. You've probably been noticing hella fake pages popping up on your feed, and it's definitely them. If you've started dating again or talking to someone new, they are mad as hell.🤣

Message from spirit📞 You need to do some self-reflection. Heal from the things that once hurt you. Figure out what you love about yourself/ what you'd like to change. Do more of what makes you happy. Cut out distractions and meditate for a clearer outlook.

*ONLY TAKE WHAT RESONATES*

💖Please DO NOT copy, repost, or steal my work. Thanks!💖

[ironunderstands]

Fu Xuan X Qingque is fucking peak IN THIS ESSAY I WILL-

Today I’m gonna yap about how underrated this absolutely incredible ship is, and why I love it, so sit back and enjoy because I have THOUGHTS. Also, thank you so much to @cosmicquilt on tumblr for providing me their own insight into it, as well as a place for me to begin, I really do appreciate it! 

Before I go in depth on them, I think their status as *package deal do not separate* is really funny and cute, and I’m surprised people don’t point it out more with just how obvious it really is.

Here’s some example’s I’ve collected (thank you quilt for the first two screenshots!) 

This is from the food event in 2.0, and to me it seems like Fu Xuan bought it out of curiosity, then Qingque had some and got messy because of it.

They are also together in the Penacony mural thing (just like Aventio hehe), and you can see Qingque reaching towards a gambling machine while Fu Xuan pulls her back, as if she predicted the other would immediately make a beeline towards the machines, and had to prevent that from happening. 

Today Is Another Peaceful Day is the name of the lightcone shared between them, whose description is quite comical.

Fu Xuan did infact find her again, she is angry and the sweets Qingque bought to placate her don’t seem like they are going to do much 😭.

Qingque also makes an appearance in Fu Xuan’s trailer, which only tends to happen when characters have an established close relationship or connection (like Dan Heng appearing in Blade’s)

Their team joining voicelines also match perfectly- in fact they tell a pretty funny story of yet another time Fu Xuan goes to look for Qingque, who’s supposedly slacking off again.

This also implies that Fu Xuan knows Qingque well enough at this point to guess accurately where she would be hiding and when she would leave, which is adorable and honestly really funny. 

Overall, on a surface level, their Looney Tunes dynamic is incredibly entertaining and endearing, making their relationship rather lighthearted and sweet. Girlboss X Girlfailure is always fun to watch and a personal favorite in ships for me is when one character has to deal with the other’s antics (you know who :3). I also think it’s a good way to set up a developing relationship, as they get closer and closer together each time they play this game of cat and mouse, which is something that is demonstrated by the game.

So, let’s look at them a little deeper now.

Within the quest, Omniscient Inquiry of Arcana, which is found within the main Xianzhou quest line, we see firsthand how much Fu Xuan actually trusts Qingque. 

Even if Qingque is often unreliable, Fu Xuan is not at all surprised that she is the one who helped bring the Nameless to her, as Fu Xuan knows she can bet on Qingque to come through with her responsibilities when she needs to.

The thing is, Qingque is lazy, but she is by no means incompetent, and gets all her work done on time. Moreover, Fu Xuan knows this better than anyone, especially considering she’s the one who has to go looking for Qingque when she slacks off 90% of the time (something which she doesn’t have to do, she could delegate someone else to do it yet every time Fu Xuan personally sees the matter done). 

So, even if Qingque is just a librarian, instead of fetching someone else to help, Fu Xuan also has her restart the base terminals for the Matrix of Presence, because she knows and trusts Qingque to be capable of it, almost without a second thought. 

Even if the task at hand isn’t particularly difficult, and Fu Xuan could easily do it herself, she lets herself be lazy and trusts Qingque to do so, as I will get into further, they are far more similar than Fu Xuan realizes.

In the quest line prior, Qingque also describes just how much she in turn believes in Fu Xuan, stating that even if the sky were to collapse, she could count of Fu Xuan attempting to hold it up- and she makes fun of Fu Xuan for being short despite being of similar stature.

A remark such as that illustrates how time and time again, Qingque has witnessed Fu Xuan put her all into protecting the Xianzhou and its people, which has earned Fu Xuan Qingque’s utmost respect, even if that doesn’t stop her from slacking off from time to time.

As funny as their dynamic is, the genuine trust they display in one another is heartwarming, and as much as they annoy one another (or really as much as Qingque bothers Fu Xuan with her antics), they truly do have faith in each other. Continually, Qingque’s awareness of the burden’s Fu Xuan has to carry slots her into a unique role of being one of the few people who could support her in a time of need.

Which is exactly what we get to witness in the Heliobi event.

Fu Xuan gets possessed and fire’s Qingque because of it, who isn’t too upset about it as admittedly her tendency to slack off was waisting her life. 

However, she attempts to give a speech to drag Fu Xuan out of her possession, attempting to mask it as her desire to not be fired disgracefully, but really she just wanted to break Fu Xuan out of the illusion. 

Unfortunately, Fu Xuan isn’t having it, and spouts a lot of stuff to the ghostbusting gang, expressing that her former attempts to change the Xianshou’s fate were futile, and that destiny is unavoidable and unchangeable, and that human’s desires to resist it are pointless.

Then, she makes the squad + QQ play a puzzle in which she controls all the outcomes, just to demonstrate how pointless the choices humans make, as they will always lead to the same result. To possessed Fu Xuan, choice is merely an illusion, a waste of time, and she cannot be convinced of it otherwise.

Until Qingque steps in. And perhaps the greatest demonstration of just how much she CARES for Fu Xuan plays out.

Qingque starts out by saying that the game Fu Xuan made them play is not an accurate representation of reality, and that the universe doesn’t have puzzles for them to solve. People have free will, and even if Qingque uses that will to slack off, those choices are still hers and still CHOICES. 

However Fu Xuan isn’t buying it, and this is when the core of why she was possessed in the first place gets revealed.

Qingque’s choices don’t have consequences, at least not far reaching as Fu Xuan’s do. But every action, every decision, every minute step in any direction that Fu Xuan takes could plunge the entire Xianzhou into chaos, and ruin EVERYTHING. 

So, Qingque proposes a new puzzle, hoping to be able to change Fu Xuan’s mind this time.

Qingque fails again this time, however Fu Xuan is starting to get an idea of what she’s getting and, and Qingque reiterates that there will always be more choices to make, even if the puzzles appear to only have one solution.

Therefore, she tries one last time.

Qingque shoves her own solution into the puzzle, her own way by drawing on the help of the ghostbusting squad, but still Fu Xuan cannot be convinced, believing instead that the thousands of different paths people take all lead to the same destination, so making choices is pointless.

However, that’s not what Qingque is getting at, and in perhaps the most heartfelt speech given in this game so far, she saves Fu Xuan, and demonstrates why her choices DO matter. Moreover, she does it in the most Qingque way possible- by explaining it through a comparison to Celestial Jade.

It’s not winning or the outcome that makes Celestial Jade fun, it’s the choices you get to make while you play it which is what makes it enjoyable. However, much like how even if the outcome of a game is predetermined, just because the universe’s destiny could be predetermined doesn’t mean people are aware of it, or that it even matters. Like in a game, in your life , you cannot control all the outcomes, but how you react to the twists and turns it throws your way, and the choices you make because of that, is what makes living worth it.

And if Fu Xuan’s choices didn’t matter, she wouldn’t be making them in the first place.  Perhaps she can’t prevent everything, and perhaps the universe really is weighted against her and the Luofu, but every day Fu Xuan makes decisions that help it stay around a little longer, that save a few more people, that buy a bit more time. The universe isn’t a game, and you can’t just determine your decisions to be meaningless because of some threatening ending that might never come to pass, and like Qingque says, Fu Xuan wouldn’t suffer the effort if what she works so hard for doesn’t mean anything. 

By reaffirming that destiny is an illusion, Qingque saves Fu Xuan and breaks her out of the Heliobi’s possession. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 

PROTECTIVE QINGQUE AAAAAARREAAAAA GRRRRRR TJEY ARE SO IN LOVE GRRRRR R SNANAKMZS AAAAAAA

Qingque tries to get out of work for good but Fu Xuan reminds her that Qingque reminded her that she had choices, and Qingque gets flustered and accepts her defeat.

What do you mean by that Fu Xuan, what do you mean by that, hmm? HMMM??? ELABORATE FU XUAN ELABORATE??? Sesbian lex???

So Qingque is in love with her boss and we all cheered, but don’t worry, and QQ also happens to get possessed by a Heliobus, and the way Fu Xuan behaves towards her is just as sweet and hilarious.

In her illusion, there’s a bunch of Fu Xuan clones who praise Qingque, much to the annoyance of Fu Xuan, who gets flustered and angry over it. Honestly I love just how many romance tropes that are displayed in their relationship, with this as a prime example. Like making a bunch of clones of your crush to praise you? Having Fu Xuan bear witness to exactly what makes Qingque happy (her praise)? The boss-employee dynamic getting reversed? I love it give me 500000. 

The nickname??? Oh you just know Qingque was waiting to call her that, infact she probably had it in her brain for a while, but just didn’t feel confident enough to do it in her previous power dynamic with Fu Xuan, so I wonder what else Qingque holds back from Fu Xuan because she doesn’t believe they are close enough for that. 

Ooh she’s mad mad GET ITS ASS FU XUAN YEAAAHHHH YEEAAH THATS WHAT YOU GET HELIOBUS HAHAHAHAHAH 

What if I ascended to another dimension? What if I left this mortal plane? What if Honkai Star Rail what if? What do you mean Fu Xuan is fussing over Qingque like a wife when her husband returns from war, what do you mean she goes, “As long as you’re okay,” then immediately is like “get back to work,” because she realized she was being too soft. What do you mean she fucking PATS QINGQUE ON THE HEAD AND LEAVES LIKE THAT???? 

I’m actually insane about this like how does nobody talk about them? The most peak relationship ever right there and I see NOTHING??? Like not only is it fucking hilarious with their game of cat and mouse they having going on with one another, but they truly just understand and adore each other even if both of them haven’t exactly realized it yet.

If I were to be 100% honest if you told me that speech Qingque gave to Fu Xuan in the Heliobi event was a confession one, then I would believe you because that was the most romantic shit ever. Like telling your companion in a time of need that their choices DO mean something and that they are such a capable individual whom everyone relies on, who YOU rely on?? If I was Fu Xuan I would have proposed right there I would have summoned up a ring I don’t care.

It’s just, I love relationships where two characters just GET one another inside and out, and FuQing is such a perfect example of it. Something about a trust that runs so deep that the two people who forged that bond don’t even realize it because of simply how long it’s persisted, like they’ve just acclimated to it because it’s been such a fixture of life for so long.

They are each other’s safety nets, and when one of them is in need, the other always delivers and UGHH IM INSANE ABOUT IT.

HOW DID THIS FLY UNDER PEOPLES NOSES??! HOW DID EVERYONE DO THE 1.5 EVENT AND NOT IMMEDIATELY START RUNNING LAPS AROUND THEIR HOUSE BECAUDE WHAT??? Literally that speech Qingque gives to Fu Xuan is one of my favorite scenes in the game, perhaps right behind the 1.6 Ratio-Screwllum scene and if you know me then you know how absolutely bonkers I am about that scene. It’s just so earnest and funny and it encapsulates the themes of HSR perfectly, with Qingque reiterating the overarching theme of the game: Trailblazing, ie moving forward with life no matter the destination (destiny), as it’s the choices you make along the way and the journey you take that matters.

Moreover, that’s what makes it so fucking good; it meshes perfectly with the overall story of the game. Despite how busy both of them are, despite how they often have higher priorities or could just go to other people or whatever, Qingque and Fu Xuan consistently choose one another, for both the most trivial and the most dire of situations. 

The road ahead for the Xianzhou is uncertain, but no matter how the path twists, Qingque and Fu Xuan will travel it side by side, and for that I will always adore them.

Thank you so much for reading! I fear I couldn’t be as intelligent about why I love this ship as I wanted to be, but I hope you at least got the idea a little bit haha. Maybe I’ll be able to me smarter about them one day but for now all my thoughts about them circle back to incoherent screaming. Honestly it’s probably because I like their dynamic far more than I like their characters standalone, so I can’t really bring that into the discussion, but perhaps with time I will be able to add onto this. For now though, all I’m hoping for is the wedding they deserve lol. 

[fumifooms]

Helki compilation

Helki is a prisoner-turned-servant. He’s a criminal canary and was implicitly one of Milsiril’s charges, and now that she’s retired he’s become her servant.

He must have gotten into Milsiril’s good graces, wether through attachment or convenience, which is a feat considering Milsiril’s a socially anxious recluse. Interesting since it’s not like he seems like the agreeable type, shifty upbeat delinquent style… We really don’t know much about him, not even what crimes he did, so there’s a lot of space for speculation on all grounds.

Edit: Shanghai QnA with Kui gave us a new juicy morsel of info!

Interesting… The original answer in japanese is: パッタドルと同じような杖を使っていました。今も同じものを支給されているのですが、すぐになくすのでもはや携帯していないようです。 That it’s written in japanese seems to say that there isn’t the same double translation issue there was last QnA, so if someone wants to look at the original phrasing and word choices it can be done. Perhaps Helki-Milsiril has a more protégé dynamic undertone than previously thought… "For various reasons", meaning circumstances that made it so the squad had to choose between saving him and saving their own skin, or like, "man this guy’s personality sucks we don’t really like him"? Likely to be a mix of several things, since ‘for various reasons’ implies the situation was either complex or they had multiple reasonings. In either case, the phrasing is very much that Milsiril couldn’t abandon him herself, and so a relationship sprung out of that. Another instance of outcasts seeking out and sticking with other outcasts in Dungeon Meshi. This could mean that it’s a bit less out of personal attachment and more out of a sense of duty on Milsiril’s side as well though.

Still edit: So then maybe him staying with Rin in that comic isn’t that much because of work ethics or that he cares for kids (or maybe he does because he feels kinship to them, alone and mistreated), but because he didn’t want to join the other canaries in that room chatting and laughing… Maybe the isolation was exacerbated because he became Milsiril’s favorite, teacher’s pet style, but I’d also be careful about assuming the others disproportionately dislike him, it could be that they just don’t really care for him. Why? Could be because of his personality, because he’s seen as shifty or unreliable or annoying, if an event, who knows who knows, but I like to think because of the Rin comic that he generally just tends to be a loner, that he’s "weird" in a neurodivergent vibe, he doesn’t conform to proper social behavior which in elven society seems especially alienating. He’s the only one with Rin to think of her sake, not only worth observing/caring for but also asks her to eat, but he does this with an offputting stare, not really emoting, and then well, the infamous alone with her staring munching covered in blood panel. He stands out. I’m a fan of the theory that it was a "Helki? Not that I dislike the guy but I’m not risking my skin for him" situation… Ok end edit back to older observations.

He seemed to be acting out of his own initiative in the Rin comic, he doesn’t look thrilled to be there in many post-canary comics but he also seems content enough. He restrains Milsiril in the Mithrun cleaning comic which is interesting to think of for their relationship.

It’s fun to notice how he’s the only one that didn’t get bored of looking after Rin, and then reports back about her condition… I’d say he was getting used to taking care of kids which would come with the job of serving Milsiril, but then, not enough for him to clean the blood off himself hah. In this way it’s interesting to think about his relationship to the idea of parenthood, he’s probably the closest thing to a father figure/male role model Kabru had growing up, without mentioning the other kids. I feel like he’d consider himself an older brother, cousin or uncle figure sooo much sooner than a father, but even then I do think it’s just his job and he’s not really invested or forming real relationships with any of them much.

It’s curious to note that he’s dressed in canary uniform presumably after having been pardoned and living with Milsiril? Which you can tell by the armor bits (the yellow strips of spider silk). In the Kabru training montage and the Rin comic specifically. It seems very implausible for him to have still been a canary while being a retired Milsiril’s servant and being with her all the time, and the cleaning with Mithrun comic (where he’s not in uniform) happens after Utaya so it could happen after Kabru was taken in but around the time of the Rin comic. So why uniform? It could be one of the best outfits he has, so it’d make sense to wear it around especially if you’re sparring or getting… Blood on you? Could just be because that's how Milsiril wants him to dress. But yeah we don't know when exactly Helki becoming Milsiril’s servant happened. We do see Mithrun’s charge Cithis be tasked with taking care of him, so a charge being given a servant-caretaker role doesn’t seem all that out of the ordinary, sometimes even prior to retiring.

Imo, if he doesn't work for Milsiril he goes back to jail/the canaries/has to try and get a job instead of just tending to her, so Helki is staying with Milsiril because she's the best option for him. He’s her milsiril's personal servant and does mostly dull tasks involved in that. He’s not particularly suited to the role but they’ve gotten used to each other to him so she took him with her, and he does prefer it to canary work so it works out decent for him. I think he’s used to reading her and managing her moods and he’s one of the rare social connection she has.

Under spoiler is stage 2 interpretation stuff, bigger speculation, in a reblog I’ll make soon I’ll go over my thoughts for stage 3 interpretation lol. Helsiril I’m coming for you

Translation of the canary hierachy chart used is by Thatsmimi, here

[timkontheunsure]

This feels like such a stupid question, especially since you just made a post about it, but I’d like your opinion on why you think there’s become such a debate now on Blitz’s skills in bed. You have fans who have been 50/50 on blitz that just accept that this fits with verosika’s claim that he was selfish in bed and stolas had no experience so he didn’t have a comparison. Then other fans like me, can’t help but feel that since this is after apology tour where we saw him effortlessly use the crystal, and his past history of ex’s, it doesn’t seem likely he’s always lacked skill; more so his ego took a hit and he lacks the confidence in his skills now. I think there have been enough hints that blitz has skills in the past, and at worst he could be selfish. It just seems like fans are reading too much into this joke to trash blitz and say he’s trash and stolas is better off. But I think you’re right, I don’t think stolas faked it. I believe he felt pleasure with blitz and they both enjoyed their time together and loved to experiment, and blitz paid attention to what stolas liked. Someone that considerate I have a hard time believing doesn’t know how to satisfy his partner. Sorry this got long and dumb, I’d just like your opinion. Blitz has been through enough now fans are questioning one of the only skills he feels he’s good for?

Probably because Blitz is really unreliable about this stuff, and just claimed two very daft things at the same time.

 (Love Vivi reposting this).

 That he's fully a top (he's not).

And that tops don't give good head as a rule (Millie disproved that seconds before).

We also get two very different reads on it from his exes. Verosika who says he was selfish with her, and no good at head. 

  But this was a relationship we know he wasn't really into, and run away from when Verosika tried to take it farther.

It's likely how he's treated his other sexual relationships, till Stolas.

And then there's Stolas; who we've heard being Very satisfied with Blitz in this regard. 

Calls Blitz's performances breathtaking.  And just from 'seeing him tonight' we get 3 different references to Blitz wanting to eat out Stolas. 

Honestly it seems to be Blitz's favourite thing for them to do together. 

He's also seems fine handing over the rains to Stolas, and be topped by him.

They've used all the toys in the toy box after all.

So why's he so invested in doing things that are un-topish (by Blitz's daft ideas anyway) when it's Stolas? 

 Because he really cares about Stolas, and like you say paid alot of attention to what made his Stolas happy. 

Blitz appears to be demiromantic*, so doesn't had alot of romantic experience previously.  The last person he appears to have fallen for was Fizz, and that didn't go well.  This has made him extra reluctant to fall in love with someone.

Sexual relationship have always seemed the safest option for him.

He still seems to equate him being good in the sack as why Stolas kept him around so long.

 And gotten fair amount of his confidence for being able to satisfy a Prince of Hell.  That confidence has gone now.

But Stolas has also made it clear that he's been given the crystal is because of his romantic feelings for Blitz, and that a purely sexual relationship won't do anymore.  

 Making the crystal a physical reminder of Stolas' romantic feelings for him.

It makes sense that Blitz is still feeling unsure if he's allowed to touch the pretty thing like that anymore, after Stolas asked him for space.  

Especially when Millie is telling him to so in a way that's basically just for Stolas.

The guy's heartbroken, and feels like anything connected with Stolas is something he can't do right.

*A demiromantic person is someone who only develops romantic feelings for another person when they have a strong emotional connection to them. Demiromantic people can be of any gender identity or sexual orientation. This includes things like crushes. Making Fizz and Stolas very special to Blitz.

(I've got a head injury at the moment, and seeing double. 

So probably going to have more than normal amount of typos and mistakes.

And some things might not be as tied together as I'd like).  

Oh and here's more of Blitz being a switch just cus😆

Think him admitting that he can share power in the bedroom, and the relationship will be part of Stolitz sorting out their power imbalance. With it becoming easier the more they communicate properly.

Oh and more proof Stolas has no complaints lol.

[junibgoode]

hurt people hurt people: gravity falls

i haven't read the book of bill but pls stay with me here.

I've seen a lot of people discuss how fiddleford was very there for ford during the bill stuff. many people pointing out how bill and fords relationship is all written like an abusive one with the unreliable narrator of ford. and how fiddleford is his only solace in that. the person, real human person with his best interests in mind, who is there for him.

but i think we lack discussion in how fiddleford is also getting hurt in this case. like the axolotl thing. and every other instance where he tries to do something nice for ford, where hes there but ford is cold to him(as alex hirsh has mentioned him doing before). this is also something relating to the messed up relationship shown between bill and ford. its not uncommon for someone in an abusive relationship to start isolating the other relationships in their life.

and fiddleford keeps coming back. ford is the most important person in his life. and hes being hurt, not by manipulation and things said, but by being ignored. by trying to help his friend, only to still have to watch the virus of his mind(bill) be stronger.

i personally do think ford and fiddleford felt romantic things about each other. at least, i'd definitely say fiddleford didnt feel entirely platonic things about ford. and neither did bill. and i think fords feeling towards bill cant be cleanly called much of anything, only that he was fascinated and enraptured by bill. and that he often revered his perspective.

so ford cares for fiddleford a great deal. hes his only remaining human connection, and he does treasure what fiddleford does. but hes still cold to him. he still ignores fiddlefords warnings and concerns.

fiddleford is playing second fiddle. to fords endeavors and bill.

and because of his fixation on helping ford and exploring science with ford, hes abandoning his family. hes ignoring his wife, and presumably kids. hes neglecting his own self worth because clearly its somewhat connected to fords treatment of him and where he lies in the lab. and just like ford, hes neglecting and isolating the people in his life who actually care about him and have his best interests in mind.

bill is hurt. he hurts ford with his love for him. ford hurts fiddleford. fiddleford hurts his family.

hurt people hurt people, and i think alex hirsch is a genius and did a fantastic job of portraying just how toxic situations play out.

[thegreymoon]

Mo Ran is so gay it isn't even funny.

Now, this is just my opinion and I realise other people have their own interpretations, but this whole episode is super telling to me of just how unreliable his narration is about having tons and tons of sex with people of both genders in his previous lifetime. He's just so... oblivious. None of this reads as a man with a lot of previous experience with many different people. He did not pick up on her flirting with him at all. Sure, he did have a lot of insane sex in his past life, but as the book unfolds, it becomes very clear that most of that sex was with Chu Wanning. At best, there were only a handful of other people he was involved with, and one was a prostitute he was paying, while the other was his wife whose relationship with him was also transactional.

I know people argue that he is bisexual because he married Song Qiutong, but when we actually get her POV on their marriage, it turns out that they had unenjoyable sex only a handful of times, at least one of which was him taking her from behind and very much imagining that it was Chu Wanning in her place. There are plenty of gay men who end up married to straight women (and vice versa) for whatever reasons and none of this makes them any less gay. He also identifies as a 'cut-sleeve' himself at one point, so he doesn't seem at all confused about his sexual attraction to men. Later on, when we finally get his unaltered POV on his life in the brothel, it comes out that he considered the girls there as sisters at best, never as sexual partners. The only other named sexual partner is Rong Jiu, who is male, and I can buy that there were possibly other people who looked like Shi Mei that he was with under the influence of the cursed love spell, but there was never any real attraction there, which is why some argue that he is attracted only to Chu Wanning and would still be attracted to him regardless of gender.

But I think that this is also not true. He definitely was obsessed with Chu Wanning from an early age, which makes it hard to see what his preferences would have been if Chu Wanning wasn't in the picture, but that chapter when he finally realises his feelings also reveals that he does have a type, which he never dared to think about before because he thought he was unworthy of having a choice. However, Chu Wanning fits this type to a tee, so it's easy to run away with the idea that he is shizunsexual and that Mo Ran's attraction begins and ends with him.

With that said, we do get confirmation later on that he does find other men attractive, in particular, Jiang Xi. It's just that he never has the space or the inclination to do anything about it because of his preoccupation with Chu Wanning. In the extras, when Mo Ran misunderstands Xue Men's relationship with Jiang Xi and thinks they are having a love affair, in his unfiltered Taxian-jun state, he is full of approval because he personally finds these powerful, beautiful, prickly, emotionally unavailable older men to be the height of attractiveness. If Chu Wanning hadn't been in the picture, Mo Ran would have definitely been attracted to Jiang Xi or someone similar. Even Ye Wangxi, whom he also fixates on, fits this type (except for the older man bit because I understood her to be only a few years older than Mo Ran). The fact that she turns out to be a woman also cannot be used as an argument for Mo Ran's bisexuality because she very much presents as a man throughout the book (but whether or not she actually identifies as one is debatable).

In short, Mo Ran does have a type of man he is attracted to and it is definitely men that he likes, regardless of his few dubious and very unsatisfying dalliances with women. While Chu Wanning definitely fits this type of ideal man, there are other men out there whom Mo Ran finds attractive too, it's just that he is too unhinged about Chu Wanning to actually do anything about it. Also, I very much doubt that Mo Ran was nearly as promiscuous as he makes himself out to be because he reads as very oblivious when it comes to sexual relationships in general. Even with Chu Wanning, who was right there and about to pass away from sheer horniness that he couldn't even begin to disguise, Mo Ran was still going, "Shizun is so pure and virtuous!" 🙄

(I'm not going to get into the whole Shi Mei situation and how badly he misread him every step of the way too, but that is because his brain was so badly mangled by him that he really stood no chance on that front until it was entirely too late.)

[platoapproved]

Okay so I'm looking back on season 2 and having some Thoughts about Dreamstat.

In 2x01 Louis says "he came by invitation," which is be backed up by how he consciously dismisses Dreamstat in 2x04. But in my opinion, it all gets way messier when - in 2x07, deeply shaken by talking about the trial - Louis hallucinates Lestat in the Dubai penthouse. It's SUCH a jarring moment; Louis' unreliability is at the forefront of the audience's mind since he has just admitted his version of Claudia's turning from 1x04 was inaccurate. Then the audience is shown that Louis is omitting things, particularly continued hallucinations. (We also see him have further non-Lestat hallucinations in 2x08 when he is plotting his revenge).

With all that in mind, I'm inclined to think that he's way less in control of Dreamstat than he insists he is. Louis says otherwise, but this is the Unreliable Narrator Show™.

So. Why I was thinking about this in the first place...

I see lots of people bringing up Dreamstat's reactions to things, mostly in a context of being angry with Louis. And I get it! Dreamstat is mocking and cruel. But I also think it's wrong to blame Louis fully for those things? At least, to blame him in the way people seem to do.

These are not things he is choosing to think, or that he is saying aloud. They exist only within his own head. Dreamstat is all his Louis's worst instinctive reactions and snap judgments, vocalized internally (we just see and hear them as the audience).

His paranoia while being romantically pursued, an understandable response given how things went down with Lestat:

His self-loathing (always comes back to the self-loathing with Louis :c):

His frustration while having an argument with his companion situationship:

These are Louis' thoughts, yes. But they're gut responses, all emotion, without filter or reasoning.

And I just can't wrap my head around thinking less of Louis for having these responses. It's a very honest and unflinching depiction of someone whose response to trauma (both from his relationship with Lestat but also, like, his entire human life) is kneejerk resentment and pettiness that he very VERY rarely vocalizes.

Even as Dreamstat is mocking Armand's romantic overtures, Louis is continuing to have discussions with him, to ask him what he needs to be happier in their relationship. Armand wants him to come around more, he shows up to the disastrous dinner where he fights with Santiago. Armand wants to bring flowers and apologize, Louis hears him out. He is CHOOSING, in spite of the cruel automatic responses of his thoughts, to treat Armand with as much fairness and gentleness as he can.

As a side note, I really read Dreamstat's laugh in the museum scene much differently than others on here. A lot of people seem to see it as Louis mocking Armand's history of sexual abuse. But Dreamstat only scowls through all that (which is, again, not great but it is understandable, given how Lestat deployed his Magnus story to win Louis back after exploding in anger, and the whole setup for Armand talking about his past is him explaining why he is not like Lestat). Dreamstat's only real reaction comes when Armand has moved on from that part of his speech, to discussing the vampiric cycle of violence.

The line he reacts to is Armand saying "Magnus who begat Lestat, Lestat who begat Louis, on and on, and on and on." And Dreamstat... doesn't laugh? I see people describing it as a laugh. He yells 'HAH!' in the angriest, bitterest, disbelieving voice. To me this is not Louis being unimpressed or mocking Armand's trauma, it's him adamantly refusing to be included in the narrative as a part of vampire culture / as a victim. We know Louis does not like people labeling him as a victim or abused. We know he wants to opt out of all Claudia's searching for vampire culture and vampire history. To me this moment is not at all about Armand, it's about Armand implying that Louis is connected with the covens, with a larger narrative of vampirism, including a narrative about makers exploiting and harming their fledglings.

No, Louis isn't perfect, and his handling of Armand is not perfect. But I think people are way too harsh on him for this scene and just in general. He is not his worst thoughts. His actions are much, much, much, much more important. He chooses Armand. I think he chooses to be as careful with Armand as he knows how to be, given the tools at his disposal. Yes, there's a horrible gremlin (ha, see what I did there?) in the bottom of his brain that tosses up vile mean judgy nonsense, but Louis then elects to ignore all that and be as kind as possible.

[touchlikethesun]

TW: sa. Hi! I hope it's okay to talk about it but about your tags in that post about SVSSS and SA being a recurring theme, I agree with a lot of it. I would say that even Bingge can be argued to be have some trauma since his first time was coerced. Someone pointed out Bingge could've become hypersexual as a result of that trauma and that it made me see the whole harem thing in a new light (but it doesn't make him innocent since he forced himself on a bunch of wives). It really is such a recurring theme it's hinted for Shen Jiu and for Su Xiyan and Binghe with the Old Palace Master. Su Xiyan's story is even the catalyst for Binghe's tragic backstory... You made a very good observation OP!

hey anon, yeah it's alright to talk about! i do appreciate you including a tw, but this is a topic i find really interesting, i actually opened my laptop back up to answer you lol

as for luo bingge, i didn't get into it in my tags bc… lowkey didn't expect ppl to read them lol (ty for doing so tho xx) and also he's quite a complicated case. we obviously can't say for certain since we see so little of him and what we do know is told to us thru multiple layers of unreliable narration, but i do think there is enough to suggest many of luo bingge's early sexual experiences were probably coerced or non-consensual, leading to trauma-induced hypersexual behavior. (edit: i am adding this parenthetical a few hours later after writing the rest of this and i didn't know how to fit it in otherwise so apologies, but i think it's worth pointing out that luo binghe - both bingmei and bingge, so i think we can consider it to be a core trait - do naturally have a much higher libido than most people. with bingmei we see how this causes issues for him in his relationship with shen qingqiu, but it's managed with kindness because sqq loves him and is patient enough to teach him boundaries and managed by binghe himself who loves and doesn't want to hurt sqq and who has been taught consent and respect from a younger age. when it comes to bingge, who lacks the sort of safe space provided by sqq and has no education in the matter, i think it's easy to see how he would have a much harder time understanding and managing his libido - again it isn't an excuse for SA, but this is just another convention of the genre that were it to be realised has horrible implications and consequences.)

but also, luo bingge lives in a world where healthy consensual sexual dynamics are so rarely modeled for him (the aforementioned coercive sex, but also constantly being gifted wives by other men, and the normalisation of rape in a world with sex pollen (sorry ik i already said that but like really it is so incredibly fucked up if you think about the implications of sex pollen in a real world)), and where he is being taught that the only way to be safe is to have physical power over others - of course we the reader know this is because it's being written as a venting male fantasy revenge story with a target audience of incels, but concretely this is bad for luo bingge's psyche, and you know, also leads him to do horrible things in retaliation and hurt and innombrable amount of people

and again, i don't know how much of this was really intentional on mxtx's part and how much i am reading into it, but svsss is about making one-dimensional smut novel characters into fully realised people and extrapolating out the implications for what it would mean for that world to be a real one. like, shanq qinghua and especially shen qingqiu have to learn that the people they live with are not as simple as they might have appeared on the screen of the webnovel. and part of the extrapolating, from my read of svsss, involves interrogating the ways characters have and have had their agency infringed upon in the original pidw and finding ways to return their agency to them in svsss. this is perhaps most clearly seen in the way all the "wife" characters in svsss are allowed to be their own people separate from binghe, with different passions and drives and again, agency to direct their own lives, contrary to sqq's expectations of them. however this also involves bringing to light just how pervasive and damaging the sexual violence in the original story really is, by showing the abuse that su xiyan suffered, by showing how binghe is negatively affected by xin mo and the other coercive elements of this world, by subverting expectations with shen jiu and showing how he was also a victim, and by making the only truly irredeemably evil character the old palace master, a disgusting old pervert and sexual harasser.

anyways yeah i think it's a really interesting aspect of svsss, and while i can understand why it might not be at the forefront of everyone's mind (good lord is it a BUMMER to think about), it would be a disservice to the narrative to forget it entirely.

[acidistyping]

Why Jiang Cheng is more like Shen Jiu than Liu Qingge: An Essay

1. Anger

All three characters are almost completely defined by their anger or aggressive natures. Both jc and lqg have similar expressions of their anger: they attack and lash out with their weapons and shout and yell. Their anger is loud. Sj's anger is quieter, more passive aggressive than explosive. He won't unsheathe Xiu Ya but will rather lash out with scathing words and insults. However, despite the difference in outward expression, sj and jc's anger serves the same purpose: a shield/mask to hide behind and protect their true emotions with. Lqg's anger doesn't serve a purpose like jc and sj's. His anger simply is.

Both jc and sj have, notably chosen, older brother figures that broke a promise to them and that they feel betrayed by, giving both deep abandonment and trust issues. For jc, it is Wei Wuxian and him leaving the Jiang Sect in order to protect the Wen remnants in the Burial Grounds. For sj, that's Yue Qingyuan and him not coming back in time to rescue sj from the Qiu household. It can be argued that Yue Qingyuan didn't break his promise as he did try, but sj didn't know that. In contrast, lqg is the older brother in his family and seems to have a good relationship with his younger sibling.

2. Older Brother Figures

3. Fire

Both jc and sj have fire and their "homes" being burned down as significant features in their backstories. For jc, that's the Wen's burning down Lotus Pier. For sj, that's him burning down the Qiu estate. Different circumstances, yes, but significant nonetheless. While we know little of lqg's backstory, fire is likely not a significant factor.

4. Villain

At least in the English speaking side of mdzs and svsss, both jc and sj are not widely liked or held in high regard. If you only take the protagonists' at their word and don't consider how the narrators may be unreliable, biased, or have missing information, you will likely see both of them as villains or at least antagonists within their respective stories. They're characters that, if you like them, you tend to sympathize with them and look at story events from their perspectives rather than from the perspective of our protagonists.

5. Rumours

Both jc and sj are the subjects of horrible rumours within their respective stories. While jc's, regarding him torturing demonic cultivators, are unknown if they're true or false, we have nothing to confirm they are and sj's rumours were proven false once Shen Yuan learned more about him. Regardless of the truth of the rumours, neither contested the rumours themselves and instead let them fester, possibly for strategetic reasons. Neither seems to mind ruining their own reputations if it will benefit something or someone else.

6. Cats

In fandom content, both are often compared to cats and portrayed with a hot/cold personality. They both are fairly prickly, deeply distrust other people, and tend to keep to themselves.

7. Ships

Both have fairly popular ships pairing them with one of the most powerful cultivators of their generations who wears a lot of white, are sect leaders, and whose sects are located on mountains. Yes, this is a silly reason but why not.

8. Demonic Cultivation

Both have ties to notable demonic cultivators of their worlds, though their situations are different. Sj with his time "studying" under Wu Yanzi and jc with Wei Wuxian. They also are notably said to have killed these demonic cultivators, though jc didn't actually do so while sj did.

—

I think lqg and jc get compared because people see them both as tsunderes, but i don't think there's anything tsundere about lqg at all actually. Lqg doesn't necessarily deny his feelings, he just doesn't always confess them in words either

[bairdthereader]

Ben is an evil genius, and I don't mean that in a good way.

(Heads up, this is quite a long post. I hope you'll find it a worthwhile read!)

[Caveat: I do think Ben is a much more complex character than is generally acknowledged, and he brings a lot of important issues to the surface throughout the comics and show. I’ll be writing on that soon. But for today, I’m focusing on one very specific way that Ben interacts with the people around him, so it’s a necessarily narrow view.]

Ben’s brand of evil genius lies in a particularly pernicious variety of emotional intelligence: the ability to identify people’s unique pressure points and hammer them with merciless accuracy. We see this first with Charlie, whose mental and emotional complexities Ben picks out and exploits to manipulate and break Charlie down, keeping himself in a position of control.

Ben insists on secrecy, which we all know is due to his own fear of discovery. But instead of owning up to that fear and discussing it with Charlie (a la Nick and his wish to take time to figure things out), Ben takes Charlie's very specific insecurities and leans on them to ensure Charlie's compliance.

We know from the flashback to their first conversation that Ben is aware of all the bullying Charlie experienced when he was outed, so he likely knows the intricacies of Charlie's pain--being called disgusting, being made to hate himself, being made to feel less than human. Ben barrages Charlie with these messages, just with slightly different language:

"I don't even know who you are." This preys on Charlie's sense of worthlessness, and it's a pressure point that Ben leans on again and again over the course of many public slights. It keeps Charlie feeling small and invisible, which in turn protects Ben from pushback or discovery.

"It's not like anyone else is going to want to go out with you, is it?" Ben knows Charlie was made to feel disgusting in the past, and this comment--which Ben also repeats--triggers those deeply painful, cyclical emotions of self-hatred, and is an attempt to make Charlie feel grateful for Ben's unreliable attention.

"As if anyone would ever want to go out with someone as desperate as you." Ben knows Charlie wants more, that he wants a relationship that means something. Here, he's twisting Charlie's desire for a loving relationship into something repulsive and off-putting, essentially ensuring that Charlie won't attempt to find anyone else.

"You were just there like some tragic loser with barely any friends who ate lunch alone and let bullies walk all over you . . . I just felt really sorry for you." Ben's exploiting Charlie's past feelings of weakness and lack of control by reminding him of the times he felt lowest. Not only this, but he spins his interest in Charlie into a charity case, trying to make Charlie feel as if he only wanted to go out with him out of pity (which we know after the finale of S2 is the thing Charlie worries about most).

But once Charlie starts consistently pushing back—saying he doesn't want to see Ben anymore, literally pushing him away at Harry’s party, the post-race conversation at sports day— and once there’s a watchful guardian in Charlie’s life (Nick) who sees Ben for what he is, Ben switches his attention to Nick. He knows that the worst way he could hurt Charlie, to take away his newfound confidence and power and reinstate Ben’s position of dominance in the relationship (such as it was), is to push Nick away from Charlie.

Ben uses his own experiences of being closeted to identify Nick’s insecurities and poke at them viciously. He knows how emotionally exhausting it can be to hide your true self, and even if he’d never admit at this point in the story that he’s hiding at all, he still recognizes that weariness in Nick and does all he can to increase it.

"Am I not allowed to like girls as well as boys?" This is Ben accusing Nick of being a hypocrite, which is something Nick has been struggling with for months now, though it’s never named as such in the show. He’s been trying to shed his rugby lad persona in favor of his authentic self, but it’s been a challenging and frightening journey during which Nick probably does often feel like a hypocrite, and here’s Ben, blatantly calling it out.

"Does Charlie know you don’t want to come out?" (Which, we have to remember, comes shortly after Ben telling Nick he needs to "stop acting so gay for" Charlie if they're trying to keep their relationship quiet.) I’d argue that this is Ben’s most effective method of attack against Nick, because it encompasses all of Nick’s challenges in one statement: the pressure he’s put on himself to come out, his niggling doubt that Charlie really believes him when he says he wants to come out, the sense that he's harming Charlie with the secrecy.

"You’re just the same as me." Ben knows that Nick is a truly decent person with almost faultless integrity—something for which Ben has no respect but perhaps a bit of deeply buried envy—so he knows he can antagonize Nick with this comparison. He also knows he can do it without fear of significant public retribution, since Nick would never intentionally out Ben, or even retaliate physically since Ben carefully avoids, mostly, directing any significant insults at Charlie himself in these confrontations, which would have been the only thing that might inspire someone as intrinsically good as Nick to lash out.

"What if I said I want Charlie back?" This is a particularly sly attack. Yes, you could argue that Ben is just lashing out in anger or desperation and that this is him grasping at straws, but this is actually the culmination of weeks of mental assault. Ben has gradually upped the ante in each conversation with Nick, chipping away at Nick’s confidence in his bond with Charlie and trying to make himself look like the better option for Charlie. He even finishes up by saying he'd never give Charlie a hickey, something for which Nick already feels intense guilt. Ben knows exactly what he's doing here.

Nick overcomes Ben's strategic attacks partly through personal fortitude, partly through a real understanding of how Ben operates, and partly through the open communication he and Charlie share that builds them both back up again.

Imogen deserves a mention here, too, as Ben exploits her pressure points with cruel ease. Once he’s secured her by being “lovely” to her, he promptly tries to exert the same power dynamics he had with Charlie, breaking her down pressure point by pressure point.

He only shows her affection when the "right" people are looking--mainly people he wants to impress, or people he wants to hurt, like Nick and Charlie. This is just as damaging, in its own way, as the secrecy he insisted on with Charlie, especially for someone as starved for affection as Imogen often seems to be (her pressure point).

Imogen desperately wants to be loved and accepted. In almost every interaction she has on screen, she’s trying to find her place, something Ben certainly sees (especially since there’s a deeply buried part of him that wants the same thing), and then exploits. Ben is openly neglectful of Imogen several times, especially on the Paris trip, showing her how little he cares while simultaneously attempting to make her feel grateful for the moments of attention she does get from him. Then, when he tells her that her desire to get a lock for the bridge is lame (just one example of this behavior), he’s casting himself as the ultimate judge and jury of her wants and needs, another power play.

As we know, this backfires pretty epically when Imogen throws all of his manipulations back in his face in one of the best breakup monologues on film. Ah, the satisfaction.

As Tao so succinctly and accurately described it, Ben has stinky energy. It’s the evil genius oozing out.

[xmoonlitxdreamx]

OW2 Junkrat & Roadhog Relationship (part 1)

Part 2: [click] Part 3: [click] Part 4: [click] Part 5: [click]

Hello! I’ve been curious to try to better understand what Junkrat and Roadhog’s relationship characterization is intended to be in OW2, so I’m gonna take the time to look at various voice lines and other media & try to provide various interpretations of these things.

I'll try to provide both positive and negative interpretations where I see fit, but be aware that I do ship roadrat so I have a bias for interpreting their relationship positively rather than negatively. Overwatch to me though is a franchise that is very loose with its characterization & allows for multiple interpretations of the same characters simultaneously, so I’ll try to be open-minded in the way that I interpret things. Some of these interpretations may also be based on stuff I’ve read in passing from other people here and on twitter, too, so if something looks familiar to what someone else said that’s why. (Apologies for the lack of citations;;)

This first post is looking at Junkrat's OW2 voice lines sourced from this wikia page. (These voice lines may not be up-to-date, and the page does not include many event-specific voice lines) Again, I’ll only be talking about lines that I think give insight into Junkrat and Roadhog’s relationship and how they think of each other.

Anyway! that's that. Interpretations/etc are under the cut!

“So, I was like, Roadhog, mate, just 'cause that's how you see it, doesn't mean that's how she sees it, right? But enough of my earbashing. Let's get out there.”

If taken as truthful: Roadhog goes to Junkrat for romantic advice

If taken as unreliable: Junkrat considers himself as someone who gives good romantic advice, and decided to use Roadhog in his made-up example

In either interpretation: Junkrat considers Roadhog a close enough friend that he talks about Roadhog to other people, and allegedly has personal conversations with Roadhog at some points. (Whether or not Junkrat and Roadhog actually had this conversation isn’t certain since imo Junkrat seems the type to talk out of his ass, but it shows that Junkrat thinks he and Roadhog are close enough that they could have this conversation.)

Unrelated to Junkrat and Roadhog's dynamic, but if taken as truthful this could suggest Roadhog has an interest in women; but if taken as unreliable, it doesn't suggest anything about Roadhog's sexuality

“I feel a sweet verse coming on. Roadhog, give me a beat. …Roadhog?”

Junkrat instinctively commands Roadhog to do things; suggestive of him perceiving himself as “leader” in their relationship.

Roadhog doesn’t listen to him here, so Roadhog likely doesn’t think of himself as subordinate to Junkrat.

This is also a very playful command, so to me it comes from a friendly/playful place that Junkrat wants to sing (rap?) with Roadhog. Could be taken further that Junkrat uses the guise of “I’m Roadhog’s boss and he’s my subordinate” as an excuse to do regular friend stuff with Roadhog.

“Things always go well when you’re working with Junkrat and Roadhog”

Junkrat thinks positively of his partnership with Roadhog, seems to trust him and have confidence when they’re together

“Such perfidy cannot go unanswered!” (respawn line when eliminated by Roadhog)

Perfidy definition from Google: deceitfulness, untrustworthiness

Basically he feels Roadhog is being disloyal to him, indicating that he thinks of Roadhog as someone who’s supposed to be his loyal partner in crime

Possibly suggests that he would seek revenge if Roadhog is disloyal to him, but as usual the delivery is kind of playful, so it might just be more indicative of him acting out this sort of “leader role” for fun

“Guess we know who’s really on top, don’t we?” (eliminating Roadhog)

Suggests that even Junkrat thinks that Roadhog is the one with the power in their partnership, but when push comes to shove Junkrat is the real leader between the two of them

this is innuendo, so this could also suggest that they have sex with each other

not an interpretation, but I actually thought they got rid of this voice line for OW2 so I was surprised to see it on this list lol

“Sorry, old friend..,” (eliminating Roadhog)

straightforward, Junkrat thinks of Roadhog as an old friend

“Bet you never thought you’d see pigs fly! *laughs*” (eliminating Roadhog with concussion mine)

uses pig-related nicknames/etc for Roadhog casually

“Another hogfight for the Cerulean Chancellor!” (eliminating Sigma using Gravitic Flux)

Thb I have no idea what’s going on here, I just thought it was weird he says hogfight. I googled hogfight to see if it’s a common idiom and nothing really came up. No idea if this actually has anything to do with Roadhog, feel free to enlighten me. (idk much abt Sigma)

“That’s what happens when you cross Junkrat and Roadhog!” (to ally Roadhog eliminating an enemy)

Again, suggests he thinks positive of their relationship, indicative that he sees the two of them as partners in crime

“Don’t die on me, you big lug!” (Roadhog downed in PVE)

Worries about Roadhog when he’s hurt; uses affectionate names for him

“They got Hoggie!” (Roadhog downed in PVE)

Same as above, though this nickname is specifically cutesy/endearing compared to the previous

“Who’s gonna revive the roadkill?” (Roadhog yet to be revived in PVE)

Along with affectionate nicknames, Junkrat also uses rude nicknames to refer to Roadhog

Taken in isolation I guess this could suggest that he thinks negatively of Roadhog, but given all the other voice lines where he seems to think positively of Roadhog this is more likely a teasing/playful way of referring to Roadhog

“At least I’m not a hog.” (along with “At least I’m not a rat.” from Roadhog)

Taken in isolation, could suggest that Junkrat doesn’t like Roadhog

Could suggest a sort of competitiveness between the two of them, or possibly that the two of them bicker a lot and don’t always see eye-to-eye

Junkrat: Me mate Roadhog says there's a fetching price on your noggin. Not as high as the one on ours, mind you...

Lifeweaver: He said all that?

Junkrat: It was more like, "Gonna turn that bloke in. Worth a heap, hurrrrrrr..."

Lifeweaver: Thank you for the warning. And the convincing impression.

Junkrat talks about Roadhog to other people

Junkrat hears Roadhog talk enough that he can do a pretty good impression of him—this is potentially indicative of how close they are considering Roadhog is known to not talk often.

Junkrat thinks of Roadhog as his friend (“My mate Roadhog”)

It’s kinda unclear if Roadhog said this stuff about Lifeweaver directly to Junkrat, or if it’s just something Roadhog was saying to himself. If it’s the latter, it’s possible to interpret that Roadhog mutters things to himself & Junkrat pays attention to it. This might suggest that Junkrat isn’t so self-centered when it comes to Roadhog and remembers things that Roadhog says. (kind of a stretch of an interpretation, but hey)

Unrelated but mysteriously, Roadhog seems to speak Australian English in Junkrat’s impression of him (he says “bloke,” which isn’t used in American English). This makes me think Roadhog is supposed to speaking Australian English (which makes sense given that he’s Australian) but in the game he just. Doesn’t. for some reason.

Lifeweaver: Are you and Roadhog together?

Junkrat: Do you ever see us apart?

Lifeweaver: No. I mean, are you a couple?

Junkrat: Yes! A couple of dashing rogues! Not sure what you're missing here...

From an outsider’s perspective (Lifeweaver), Junkrat and Roadhog seem like a couple.

Junkrat and Roadhog are always together (“Do you ever see us apart?” implies they’re never apart)

Tbh there’s a lot of ways to interpret Junkrat’s last line, but I think the most straightforward interpretation is just that he’s oblivious to what Lifeweaver is asking, possibly because of the phrasing. Other possible interpretations:

He doesn’t think of himself and Roadhog as a couple and likewise is oblivious to the fact that they seem like a couple to other people.

Junkrat doesn’t know what couples are (though I think this can be disproven by the fact that he’s “giving” Roadhog relationship advice in one of the voice lines I mentioned earlier)

Junkrat isn’t interested in Roadhog and is deliberately friend-zoning him here

Junkrat and Roadhog are a couple (since he answers “yes,”), but he backpedals because it’s supposed to be a secret

Junkrat’s just messing with Lifeweaver and being intentionally obtuse (unlikely imo, he seems earnest here)

Junkrat thinks of Roadhog as a “dashing rogue”

Roadhog: Say “bacon” one more time.

Junkrat: “Bacon, one more time.”

Junkrat likes to annoy Roadhog

Junkrat isn’t scared of annoying Roadhog

Reaper: You got a problem, Junker?

Roadhog: *chuckle*

Junkrat: I don’t do problems—just solutions!

Roadhog: *laughs* Yeah!

I can’t find the audio for this interaction on the wikia, so I’m not sure what the inflection is. Seems likely that Roadhog is sarcastically agreeing with Junkrat here, but I can’t tell.

Edit: I was told that Roadhog's "Yeah" sounds genuine in-game, so this could be an indication of Roadhog actually following along with Junkrat & engaging in their partners-in-crime dynamic

Edit 2: Roadhog's quotes page indicated that only one of the three dialogue options are triggered by Reaper's line, so Roadhog's "yeah" is most likely not in response to Junkrat's potential line

Summary of this section: It seems like Junkrat thinks positively of Roadhog, thinks of him as a friend, and considers the two of them to be partners in crime. He sometimes uses affectionate pet names for Roadhog, but also uses some crass nicknames with him. There may be a sense of competitiveness between the two of them, where Junkrat thinks of himself as leader while Roadhog thinks otherwise. Junkrat occasionally uses this imagined “superior/subordinate” status playfully as a way to engage in regular friendship activities with Roadhog.

The next section will be me looking at Roadhog's OW2 voicelines. iirc he doesn't mention Junkrat as much as Junkrat mentions him, so I anticipate it'll be shorter and probably less positive lol but anyway! Thanks for reading!

Part 2: [click] Part 3: [click] Part 4: [click] Part 5: [click]