#who am i and what have i done with myself

[cullenssweatyballsakk]

People make mistakes and say unsavory things. It happens. Its part of life. If you expect everyone to be absolutely perfect, everyone will fall short.

Cancelling someone who has one distasteful video or take is counterproductive at best and just downright stupid at worst.

It gets even worse when reasonable people are cancelled over small things, when they would have taken criticism/correction very well and actually learned from that moment.

Since some of you niggas continue to be intentionally dense, let me spell this shit out.

A child points out that someone's teeth are very yellow.

Their parents beat the shit out of them for the small offense, and do not explain why they beat the shit out of the child.

The child is confused, as they point out the colors of things they see during their day with their parents all the time. That person's teeth just happened to be yellow and they pointed out what they saw, not understanding that it may hurt the other person's feelings.

Instead of pulling the child aside, explaining as to why what they said was not appropriate, and moving on, the situation was blown out of proportion over something small and/or harmless.

Children are naturally very intuitive, and most children would learn from that and not do it again.

Now replace children with one singular person and the parents with the general public.

When you explain things and communicate, things go a lot better. But if you crucify someone for saying something considered insensitive or unkind without giving them the chance to learn and grow, it becomes unproductive to the larger movement in question.

If I'm fighting for the right to be as I am, I don't give a fuck if the guy who's protesting next to me once said something somewhat right-leaning. If he's in my side, and genuinely has my back at that moment I DON'T CARE.

I can talk to him about that shit later. Persecuting him for it is actively taking away from the cause in question, and if anything, I've done more of a disservice to myself and the other of the cause.

Y'all got too used to screaming and wailing when someone did some shit you don't like. Some shit you have to let roll off of your back and you have to LET. IT. GO.

Stop compromising our fights over some people not being perfect. I'm not perfect. I'm a hypocrite. We all are in our own ways. Some shit you just have to get over and push on.

I've met some reasonable, easy to talk to, and even pleasant right wing people. I've met absolutely UNBEARABLE left wing people. I've also met unbearable conservatives and pleasant liberals.

Some of the most thought-provoking, eye opening and deep conversations I've ever had were in my own house with my uncle who is conservative leaning, and my mother who is more left-leaning but hates to be categorized by the left/right. I would consider myself to be quite radically on the left.

There were times when it was my uncle who was the most reasonable person out of all of us, and talking with them made me realize that everyone has their own set of valuable opinions which need to be considered. My uncle has said some things I wholeheartedly agree with, and my mother has said things I thought were absolutely bogus.

Both of them taught me that listening solely to your own views in an echo chamber is unproductive.

Please learn to keep focus on the actual issues instead of stupid non-issues that can be resolved at a later time.

[phantom-dc]

Vivisection Deception

“Yes, dad. I will vacuum the living room. Yes, I will also do my homework. No, I won’t forget the Ecto-filter. Love you too, say hi to mom and Jazz for me, bye!”

Danny hung up the phone. Sitting back into the booth at the Nasty burger, he got back to his burger. Tucker took a big bite, before talking with his mouth still full:

“So, your parents and sister are all out of town for the whole weekend? They had no problem leaving you alone unsupervised?”

Sam looked at Tucker with disgust, warning him to empty his mouth first. Danny nodded, agreeing with Sam:

“Yeah! Jazz wanted to explore different universities for when she graduates, even though that’s still a few years away. Still, mom and dad agreed to drive her if they could combine it with a visit to a convention for the Occult. Pretty sure they’ll be the only “scientists” there again, but that’s not my problem. Mom decided that she I could stay home alone. A sign of trust, Jazz called it. Something about "improving through positive reinforcement", I guess.”

Sam finishes her salad, and looks jealous. Danny invites both her and Tucker over for a weekend of gaming and fast food, but both decline, to his surprise. Sam groans, frustrated:

“I would love a weekend with no parents! Mine are forcing me to this, rich people yacht party. Mom keeps saying I might find a nice boy there, so I know it will be a weekend full of mom trying to play matchmaker with snotty rich boys. YUCH!”

Tucker apologizes as well. His parents are taking him to visit his grandma this weekend. He hasn’t seen her in a while, so he can’t cancel it, either. Danny looks a bit sullen about that, but smiles through it:

“Guess I’ll have the weekend to myself then! Maybe I can actually get this book report for Mr. Lancer done… Or I can even play a bit of Doomed!”

Friday evening, Phantom is flying back home. He has just seen Sam & Tucker off at the airport, and was looking forward to a weekend of peace and quiet:

“Man, sometimes I just forget how rich Sam is! I didn’t know her family has a private jet-“

Suddenly his Ghost Sense goes off. Getting into a battle stance, Phantom looks around. He is just in time to dodge a pair of claws heading straight for him! Turning around and shooting an ectoblast, Phantom tries to figure out who the ghost is. When the ghost taunts him at becoming slower every day, Phantom recognizes his voice:

“Bertrand! I am SO not in the mood for you!”

Bertrand laughs, and says that he was hoping for that. He attacks Phantom again before flying off, taunting Phantom to chase him. After a few hours Phantom lost his trail, and heads home. De-transforming before going inside Fentonworks, Danny is annoyed he’ll have to deal with Bertrand, but at least Spectra wasn’t with him. She’s the real threat.

When Danny steps inside, he finds the house is a mess! There are cannisters with Ectoplasm throughout the house, and the temperature is set to near freezing. Confused and suspicious, Danny goes to the lab. There he finds the cause of the mess:

“Mom?? What are you doing home? Aren’t you supposed to be with Dad & Jazz on her University trip?”

Maddie turns to Danny and quickly puts a strange gasmask on him. She is wearing one as well, along with her safety goggles:

“Hello sweetie! Quick, put this mask on! The samples we managed to collect give of Ectoplasmic fumes, so you’ll have to keep wearing it in the house, ok?”

Danny follows her advice, and puts it on. He again asks her what she is doing home, when Jack enters the lab as well, also wearing a gasmask and his safety goggles. Danny thinks the fumes must be pretty dangerous if his dad is wearing the goggles. He usually forgets to put them on. Jack gives Danny a big hug that would cause many regular humans severe backpain:

“Son, you’re home! We were worried sick when your mother and I got home early and you weren't here. Jazz thought we were “hurting her chances” to get into the school of her dreams, so she sent us home.”

Danny rolls his eyes, knowing exactly what kind of antics his parents could get up to when left unsupervised. He asks Maddie what is up with all the cannisters in the living room. Maddie apologizes, while turning the heat down even further:

“We managed to find a way to extract even purer Ectoplasm from the Ghost Zone! We took so many samples we can’t even fit them in the lab, this will be great for our research! Oh, but I am sorry, sweetie. The samples need to stay very cold, so we can’t turn up the heat. If you need, I can get you more blankets?”

Danny sighs frustrated, not looking forward to a weekend of cold. He declines Maddie’s offer, instead opting to go to bed. It is very late after all. Which is when Jack blocks the way upstairs:

“Don’t think you can distract us that easily! Or did you honestly think we didn’t notice?”

Danny is confused, but before he can answer Maddie interrupts him:

“That’s right, it IS late! In fact, it’s 2 hours past your curfew! Now why do you keep doing this, Danny? We’re not asking much of you, only that you come home at a reasonable time! Just because we weren’t supposed to be home yet, doesn’t mean you can stay out until who knows when! You are grounded, young man! You’re not allowed out this weekend, and hand over your phone!”

Danny tries to protest, but it’s in vain. Handing over his phone, he heads to bed, dejected. As he lies in bed, freezing, he wonders if things would be easier if he could just tell them what he was doing. Judging from that time with Freakshow and the Reality Gauntlet they would accept him, right? If they knew he was Phantom he could just tell them he was hunting Ghosts…

Saturday turns out to be the worst. Danny is woken up forcefully by his dad, who tells him he isn’t allowed to sleep in as long as he is grounded. Sleepily, Danny goes downstairs, a blanket around him and that stupid gasmask on his face. He asks Maddie how he is supposed to eat breakfast with that thing on. Maddie seems to think for a bit, and says that he is right. She will allow him to go out to get himself something to eat.

Danny quickly races upstairs, a bit confused about that break of curfew but not wanting to lose the chance to get out off the house. After getting dressed Jack tells him to get home back after immediately, or else he’ll be worse then grounded! That was a few hours ago. Cursing his bad luck, Danny races home:

“Please, please, PLEASE be too busy in the lab to notice I’m late! Of course the Ghosts also decide to ruin my weekend! First Ember doing an impromptu concert at the Nasty Burger, which means I can’t get breakfast. Then Johnny & Kitty are fighting it out at the food court in the mall, so I can’t get lunch either! If mom & dad send me home without dinner…”

De-transforming and entering Fentonworks, Danny looks around. The living room is still a mess of cannisters and the place is freezing, but he doesn’t see his parents. That means he might be able to bluff he was home for a while and they didn’t notice. If he can just get his chores done before they come upstairs…

“DANNY! COME DOWN TO THE LAB, NOW!”

Hearing that, Danny groans. This weekend is going from bad to worse! Putting on a gasmask, he heads to the lab. There he finds Jack & Maddie preparing a table with a big drill attached to it. Danny lies that he going to do his chores quickly while they are still busy, and empties the Fenton Thermos into the Ghost Zone without them noticing. When he turns around, he is not prepared for what happens.

The next moment he is trapped in a ghost-proof net, shot from a Fenton Net-bazooka. Confused, Danny asks what is happening, but receives no answer. Instead, Jack electrifies the net, causing Danny to instinctively transform into Phantom to protect himself, before passing out from the pain.

When he comes too, he is in hell. His parents saw him transform outside on new camera’s that Danny didn’t know off, and denounced him, both as a human being and as a son. They see his act of releasing the Ghosts back into the Zone as a sign that he too is evil. Danny is cuffed to an examination table and his powers are restrained. He is truly trapped as Maddie makes the first incision. Hours pass and Danny wonders how he can still be alive and conscious. He wishes he wasn’t. He didn’t know what was worse, the pain or the constant venom coming from his parents mouths, calling him all sort of horrible things. They must truly hate him. Danny, now terrified of every move his parents make, can only think of one thing:

Escape.

He must get out of here or they’ll kill him for good! He needs to get as far away from here as possible! For once, it seemed his Fenton Luck decided to show mercy. When they reached his Core, Jack had grabbed a remote. Shouting with a sick glee that he had the drill ready for this, he pushed a big red button. Maddie looked up, shouting that was the wrong remote, but it was already done.

With a loud noise, the cuffs popped open and Danny was free! Not thinking for a second, he shot into the roof, out of Fentonworks and towards the horizon. He need to get out of there! He’s never looking back!

Inside the lab, Jack & Maddie look at the spot Phantom fled through the ceiling. Suddenly Maddie begins to laugh:

“HAHAHAHA!!! It worked! That was absolutely delicious! He’ll be miserable for the rest of his life!”

Taking off the gasmask and goggles, ‘Maddie’ reveals herself to be Spectra in disguise! Next to her, ‘Jack’ morphs back into Bertrand.

“A brilliant plan, truly! Not only are we rid of that little Freak, but the misery of his little friends will be a great dessert!”

Spectra takes out Danny’s phone, seeing several missed calls from the real Jack & Maddie. Throwing it on the Ectoplasm and blood covered table, she decides to go celebrate. Heading into the Ghost Zone to get Ember and Kitty to repay the favor, neither Spectra not Bertrand notice the Portals Ectofilter beeping dangerously, since they had inadvertently prevented Danny from replacing it.

Outside, the Fenton RV rolls up. Jack, Maddie and Jazz are worried sick since Danny isn’t answering his phone. Jack is about to open the car door when the Portal explodes, taking Fentonworks with it. Months later the Fentons still blame themselves for leaving their son home alone. Police reports will later say that the only casualty is Danny Fenton.

Several states away, homeless boy Danny Nightingale attracts the attention of several heroes and villains alike…

[chaoticwriting]

Gotham's New Rouge 5

Part 4

-Watchtower-

The Justice League is having their weekly meeting today and as always, Batman is reading the reports for global events that the others already read but Batman says that he is sure some of them Barry and Hal don't.

So here they are, bored out of their minds when suddenly, an alarm went off. Not the 'Oh no the apocalypse is happening' alarm. More like ' Oh no something big is happening' alarm.

Cyborg clicks some buttons on his arm and a hologram appears on the table. The hologram shows a livestream with a kid wearing a half mask that has a big red creepy smile on it plus his weirdly glowing green eyes. Both Barry and Hal shudder when they see the eyes of the kid. Suddenly, the kid starts to laugh while greetthe viewers.

Trickster: Hello, everyone! Today, I have a very special livestream. I am doing an interview!

The kid turns the camera into a view of 2 men in white suits being hung from the ceiling staring intensely at the kid.

Trickster: Presenting our guests for today. Would you like to introduce yourselves?

Agent P: Fuck you! You ghost scum. Just you wait until I get out of these restraints.

Agent Q: Release me you bastard! You wouldn't get away with this!

Trickster: Oh yikes. Our guests today are quite violent aren't they? Anyway, let me introduce them. Over here are Agent P and Agent Q or Simon Hawk and Larry Rose. They are members of the now infamous Ghost Investigation Ward, a secret government branch that focuses on "researching" and "developing" weapons against ghosts.

Agent Q: We develop them to fight against scum like you. You evil scheming bastard.

Trickster: Now, that we talk about it. Here is their research conclusion. *Pulls out a stack of paper* *Takes out a pair of glasses and wears them* Ehem Ehem. Ghost or ecto entities are defined as creatures that are made of or heavily contaminated by ectoplasm. Ecto entities are non sentient nor sapient. They take on the form of our loved one to deceive us and kill us. They are evil and must be destroyed.

After Trickster finishes reading the document out loud, he takes off the glasses and puts down the document.

Trickster: Anyway, I'm pretty sure I am sapient and sentient because I have been thinking real hard on what is the next prank is going to be. And I'm also pretty sure that I am not a ghost, at least not fully since I don't know who I am supposed to impersonate except myself.

Agent P: Shut up! We all know that you ghost scum all tell lies. Deception is in your nature from the moment you are born.

Trickster: Racist much? Heh, if I am capable of lies then, I am sentient and sapient but if I am not sentient nor sapient, I shouldn't be able to lie. Make it make sense people.

Agent P: You liar! I've seen what your kind has done before this. That Phantom scum is lucky we didn't catch him or else we would have cut him open and torture him to death.

Suddenly, Trickster stalls at the words. The viewers can see frost starts to form around the room as ice slowly crept up the two agents' legs. An alarm suddenly turns on and Trickster suddenly wakes up from his budding rage.

Trickster: Well well well. It seems we have visitors. Off you go.

Picking up the two agents, Trickster throws them into a portal that he opens as Nightwing and Batman appears on the scene.

Batman: Where did you take them?

Trickster: Sorry, but I ain't gonna tell you. I have a special game for this type of person.

Nightwing: Wait! Trickster, I know you are a good kid. We can talk about it. You can still stop before you do something you might regret.

Trickster: You know, Nightwing. I used to have so much mercy. I let them live. Time and time again. No matter what they did. I forgave them. I let them go. I believe in the preciousness of human lives. But I am not 14 anymore. I can't stay positive and expect them to one day turn to the good side. Not when they don't learn anything from their wrong doing. And I will teach them that every action has consequences.

Nightwing: Wait!

Batman throws a batarang at Trickster but he easily blocks it with a wall of ice. Nightwing tries to rush after Trickster but the portal has already closed before he manages to catch up to Trickster.

The two of them stare in silence as the only thing left of Trickster is the camera that he used to livestream.

[snowysosturn]

Fire & Desire - Matt Sturniolo Part 12

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

Pairing: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary: Y/n has always clashed with Matt. Despite working for Chris’s clothing brand and being close with Nick, her relationship with Matt has always been tense at best. While being forced to be around each other more, their animosity turns into something deeper. Can they overcome their differences, or will their fiery emotions tear them apart?

Warnings: angst, tension, arguments, mentions of alcohol, being intoxicated

I sat cross legged at the small vanity in my room, blending out the last bit of highlighter on my cheekbones. My outfit I had planned to wear was already laid out on the bed behind me, ready for the evening ahead. My hair was half done, still tied back loosely as I finished off my makeup. It felt nice to have a little time to myself to unwind and prepare, especially after the long day of travelling.

I was in the middle of putting eyeliner in my waterline when I heard a knock at the door. "Come in" I called out, not looking away from the mirror as I focused on not poking my eye.

The door creaked open, and I glanced at the reflection to see Matt stepping in, a glass in his hand. "Vodka lemonade" he said, his voice still carrying the unmistakable slur of someone who had had a little too much to drink.

I turned fully to face him, raising an eyebrow. "You remembered what I drink?"

He shrugged, his grin lopsided but genuine. "Of course. Hard to forget when its the only thing you drink"

I rolled my eyes, taking the glass from him. "Thanks, I guess" I said, swirling the liquid before taking a sip. The moment it hit my tongue, I winced, coughing slightly. "Oh my god Matt! All I can taste is vodka!"

He laughed, leaning against the doorframe like it was holding him upright. "Yeah well, you’ve got some catching up to do. Consider it motivation."

I shook my head, setting the glass down on the vanity. "It’s almost like you’re trying to kill me" I teased, but there wasn’t any bite to my words.

He gave me a wink, nearly stumbling in the process, and we both laughed. For a moment, it was like we never hated each other. It was weird. Today, we’d actually been nice to each other. From the plane to downstairs to now, it was almost like we’d turned a corner. Or maybe the alcohol had simply dulled his usual sarcasm.

Matt straightened up and glanced around my room, his eyes landing on the green crochet outfit on the bed. "That what you’re wearing tonight?" he asked, nodding toward it.

"Yep" I said, turning back to the mirror to finish my eye makeup. "I’m just hoping it comes to get the way I have it in my head."

"Bet it’ll look good" he said, his tone softer than I expected. When I glanced back at him, he was already heading out the door. "Hurry up though. Dinner waits for no one, especially when you’re as drunk as I am."

"I’ll be down soon" I replied, watching as he gave me a lazy wave and disappeared into the hallway. After Matt left my room, I set the vodka lemonade on the dresser, deciding to pace myself as I continued getting ready. As I stood back to admire the final look, I adjusted my halterneck top, making sure everything sat just right. 

I slipped on my nude heels, grabbed a small clutch, and downed half of the vodka lemonade Matt had brought up. The burn of vodka was strong, but he wasn’t wrong, I did have catching up to do if I wanted to match their buzz. By the time I walked down to the foyer, everyone was gathered there.

“You took long enough” Nick teased with a grin as I joined them.

“Beauty takes time, Nicholas” I shot back, earning a laugh from the group.

We stepped out of the villa together, the warm evening breeze carrying the faint scent of sea salt. The walk to the restaurant wasn’t far, but navigating the uneven path in heels was proving to be a challenge. After a few steps, I stumbled slightly on a dip in the road.

“You alright?” Matt asked, catching up to me.

“Yeah, these heels and this road aren’t exactly the best of friends, a bit like us” I muttered, half laughing at myself.

Without saying a word, he offered his arm. I hesitated for a moment before looping my hand through it.

“Don’t make it weird” he said, smirking down at me.

“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of it” I replied with a sarcastic smile, though I appreciated the gesture.

We arrived at the restaurant, a cozy spot with string lights draped across the patio. As we approached our reserved table, I heard Nick let out a quiet yell.

“What are you guys doing here?!” he exclaimed, his voice a mix of shock and excitement.

I looked up to see a couple seated at our table, their parents. Their mom stood up with a wide smile, pulling Nick into a hug.

“We’ve been in Hawaii for the last few days” she said warmly. “We wanted to surprise you!”

Their dad chimed in, “But don’t worry, we’re staying on the opposite side of the island. We’re not here to crash your whole trip.”

Nick let out a laugh, still processing the surprise. Chris and Matt looked equally stunned but pleased to see them. 

The waiter approached to seat us, and we quickly rearranged our tables, one table with four seats and one table with three. I glanced at Matt, who caught my eye with an amused look.

“This should be fun” he said.

“Let’s just hope they don’t figure out how drunk you three are” I whispered back, earning a small chuckle from him.

We settled into our seats, Nate sat across from me, Matt was next to him, and Chris was beside me, while Nick took one of the seats at the table with his parents.

Chris leaned forward toward his parents while pointing at me,  his tone casual yet proud as he introduced me to his parents. “This is Y/n” he said. “She works with me for Fresh Love. We’ve been working hard on the new drop, couldn’t do it without her!.”

I smiled politely, but before I could say anything, Nick chimed in from the other table, his grin as wide as ever. “And she’s also my best friend” he added, his playful tone leaving no room for debate.

Their mom smiled warmly, nodding in approval, but the moment didn’t last long. Nick dove into conversation with his parents, leaving the four of us at our table to converse with each other.

Nate glanced up at Matt and Chris, his lips curling into a smirk. “Actually, I never asked how’d Vegas treat you two? Looked like you guys were.. occupied” he said, his words almost like he was implying something.

Chris chuckled, leaning back in his seat. “Occupied is one way to put it. Christina practically glued herself to Matt” he teased, earning a scoff from Matt.

Hearing another woman’s name left a bitter taste in my mouth. I had no reason to feel jealous, and yet, the idea of Matt being drooled over by someone else stirred something in me that I couldn’t quite place. It was irrational, and I knew it, so I kept my thoughts to myself, silently picking at the edge of my napkin.

Nick’s voice broke the conversation as he turned to Chris. “Hey, wanna head outside for some pictures real quick before we order?”

Chris nodded, standing up and following Nick without hesitation, leaving just me, Matt, and Nate at the table.

There was a brief moment of silence before their mom, who I assume was half listening to our earlier conversation, leaned over with a smile. “So Nate, do you have anyone special in your life right now?”

Nate chuckled, shaking his head. “No, not at all” he replied, his tone light.

Matt, of course, couldn’t resist. “Harsh one.” He snickered under his breath, looking directly at me.

I raised an eyebrow at him, confused by his comment. Before I could even ask what he meant, Matt took things further. He smirked and leaned back in his chair, his voice loud and clear. “Y/n and Nate went on a date last week, you know that?”

My heart sank, my face flushing red as all eyes seemed to land on me.

“What?” I stammered, but Nate jumped in before I could say anything more.

“It wasn’t like that at all” he said firmly, shaking his head. “We just grabbed dinner as friends.”

Matt wasn’t ready to let it go, though. “Oh, come on, Y/n” he teased, his voice making a mockery out of me. “Why so quiet? Feeling the sting of public rejection?”

My stomach twisted in humiliation. I could feel my face burning as I desperately avoided eye contact with anyone at the table. The old Matt was back just like that.

“Matt, stop being so rude” their mom interjected sharply, her tone firm. She turned back to her husband, trying to steer the conversation away from Matt’s antics.

“Yeah c’mon man we’re just friends” Nate tried to make it clear.

But Matt wasn’t done. His next words hit like a punch to the gut. “Oof, imagine just being a quick fuck and then friendzoned.”

The air left my lungs. The humiliation was overwhelming, and I could feel the sting of tears forming in my eyes. None of what he said was true, but the damage was done.

“I.. I’m actually not feeling the best right now.. I think it's the heat.. excuse me” I said quickly, my voice cracking as I stood up. I turned to their parents, forcing a polite smile through the lump in my throat. “But it was lovely to meet you.”

Without waiting for a response, I walked away from the table, the tears streaming down my face before I even reached the door.

As I pushed through the entrance, I nearly ran into Nick and Chris, who were heading back inside.

“Y/n?” Chris asked, his expression immediately shifting to concern. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t feel well” I mumbled, not stopping to explain. Before either of them could say another word, I kept walking, desperate to escape the restaurant, the humiliation, and, most of all, Matt.

I still felt the heat on my face, not from the warm Hawaiian night, but from the lingering embarrassment curling in my stomach. I really hoped his parents didn’t hear him say that. I was halfway down the quiet street when I heard the sound of running footsteps behind me.

“Y/n, wait!”

I clenched my jaw, picking up my pace, but Matt was faster, jogging until he caught up beside me. “Come on, don’t be like that” he said, slightly out of breath. “I wasn’t trying to embarrass you.”

I stopped abruptly, whipping around to face him. “Oh, really? Because bringing up that in front of your parents sure didn’t make me feel like the star of the evening.”

He ran a hand through his hair, his usual cocky demeanor fading. “I wasn’t thinking. I was just messing around, you know how I am-”

I let out a sharp laugh. “Yeah, I do. That’s the problem.” I turned back around, ready to keep walking, but he stepped in front of me, blocking my path.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” His voice was softer now, the arrogance stripped away. “I didn’t mean for it to come out like that.”

I folded my arms, giving him a glare. “And yet it did.”

He exhaled heavily, clearly frustrated, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t going to let him smooth this over with some half assed apology.

“Y/n” he tried again, “I just-”

“I don’t care, Matt.” My voice was cold, firm. “You always do this. Say something without thinking, then act like it’s not a big deal when it is. I don’t need an apology. I just need you to stop.”

He stared at me for a moment, as if trying to figure out a way to fix this, but I wasn’t interested in hearing it. So I stepped around him and walked away, leaving him standing in the middle of the dimly lit street, finally at a loss for words.

He didn’t follow me this time. Maybe he finally got the message, or maybe he knew pushing it any further would only make things worse. Either way, I didn’t care. My chest still burned from embarrassment, and my head was buzzing with frustration as I made my way back toward the villa.

I reached the villa, slamming the door behind me before kicking off my heels and making my way to the room. The relief of being alone and actually having a bedroom door for privacy was short lived because not even five minutes later, there was a knock.

I sighed, already knowing who it was. “Go away, Matt.”

“Just let me in for a second” he called through the door. “Please.”

I rolled my eyes, but something in his voice made me hesitate. It wasn’t his usual cocky tone. It sounded.. tired. Frustrated, even.

Against my better judgment, I walked to the door and swung it open. “You’ve got sixty seconds.”

Matt stepped inside, his jaw tight, hands shoved in his pockets like he wasn’t sure what to do with them. “Look” he started, pausing for a second before meeting my eyes. “I was a dick. I know that.”

I folded my arms. “Great self awareness. Anything else?”

He let out a sharp breath, shaking his head. “I don’t know why I said it. Maybe I was trying to be funny, or maybe I was just being an idiot, probably both. But I didn’t mean it the way it came out.”

I scoffed. “You said I was a quick fuck that got friendzoned, Matt. How else was that supposed to come out?”

He winced, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“But you said it” I shot back, my voice rising. “In front of your parents, no less. Do you even think before you speak, or do you just say the first thing that pops into your head?”

“I-” He stopped, exhaling slowly. “I don’t know. I guess I just didn’t think you’d care so much.”

I blinked at him, stunned. “Care? Are you serious? You embarrassed me, Matt. You made me look like some desperate fool who got used and thrown away. Why wouldn’t I care?”

Matt’s jaw clenched, his eyes flickering with something I couldn’t quite place, frustration, maybe, or something worse. I could tell he wanted to argue, to push back, but I wasn’t going to let him.

“You know what pisses me off the most?” I continued, folding my arms. “It’s not just what you said, it’s that you acted like you knew everything. Like you had some inside joke at my expense. And for what? A laugh?”

Matt exhaled sharply, shaking his head. “It wasn’t like that-”

“Then what was it like?” I challenged, my voice rising. “Because you made it sound like I was some easy target for Nate. And for the record, nothing ever even happened between us.”

Matt’s brows furrowed, his lips parting slightly in surprise. “What?”

“You heard me.” I snapped. “That night? Seven Minutes in Heaven? We didn’t even kiss. We sat there and talked, thought we’d mess with everyone's heads. And when we went out when you were in Vegas, and we made it clear we were just friends. There was nothing more to it.”

Matt blinked, like the idea had never even crossed his mind. “So you-”

“I never hooked up with Nate.” I interrupted, my tone sharp. “Not then. Not ever. So whatever picture you had in your head, whatever assumptions you made, they were wrong.”

He was quiet for a second, his hands still shoved in his pockets. “I didn’t know that.”

“No, you didn’t” I said bitterly. “Because you never asked. You just assumed.”

I could see it sinking in, the weight of his words finally hitting him, but I didn’t feel the satisfaction I thought I would. I just felt tired.

Matt let out a slow breath, rubbing the back of his neck. “I was an asshole.”

“Yeah” I said, my voice flat. “You were.”

He glanced at me, like he wanted to say more, but I was done.

“I don’t have the energy for this” I muttered, stepping back toward the door. “I’m done, Matt. I don’t care how sorry you are. Just leave me alone. It’s best if we just stay out of each other's way for the rest of the trip.”

His jaw tensed, but this time, he didn’t fight it. He just nodded.

“Alright” he said quietly. “Goodnight, Y/n.”

I didn’t reply. I just closed the door, locking it this time.

a/n : everything is .. not changing?

taglist : @mattybearnard @sturn-33 @ncm9696 @yourfavsturniologirl @crazy4jewel @sodakid1234 @stupendoustreewinner @lovealwayssturniolos @matthewsturniolosss @m4ttsmunch @loveexxx @ilusa @starkeyszn @wonnieeluvvr @dylnblue @valxrieq @maggot3647 @cigarettecemetary @ribread03 @chrisstvrns @bandasaruswrx @noplaceissafeanymore @amexiass @witchofthehour @mattssgf @jetaimevous @v33angel  @ivysturnss @urmom69lol @ashlishes @watercolorskyy @sturnioloshottiekay @amelia-sturniolo3 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @pvssychicken @alizestvrnss @chrisstxrnsaxe @sophand4n4 @vickytaa @marrykisskilled @bxtchboy69 @yourfavsturniologirl @julisturn @sydneyylainn @sophia-77n @trevorsgodmother @sturnslutz @yourmother29 @girl24cherry @astronea @pinkdyit

[boomsophie]

okay, so, wow. got a huge bombshell dropped on me this morning (tbh i can’t even say that because i sorta found it myself as i was stalking @muwapsturniolo i’m so sorry if that’s creepy i just love ur page it’s so comfy and i stumbled on it).

i’m extremely new to the sturniolo community. i only recently (about two weeks ago) discovered their youtube channel and of course i just fell in love with how authentic and funny they are. and then i started lurking around the community and it seemed so kind and amazing and welcoming — and for the most part, i believe that 99.9% of it is.

but then i found the exposure on a pedo within the community, who has victims who have come forward, and y’all, my heart stopped.

i won’t be adding any detail to it as, again, i just discovered it this morning and my knowledge on it is very surface level, and i feel that trying to expand on it would just be insulting to the victims as i don’t personally know their stories. and, it’s also not the main point of this post.

i mean, of course i’m shocked so it is a big factor, and i’m mortified as i was a victim of grooming myself when i was 15. so hearing that there was someone so depraved within a community that, in all honesty, was the warmest and most enthusiastically kind i have ever seen, was just jaw dropping.

as i was essentially scrolling and eating up this info, i came across a post by @bernardsbendystraws regarding her stance on minors — and it really opened my eyes too. (you can see the post here.)

i have had blogs in the past in which i’ve put strict mdni regulations on. that’s because, for the most part, i write smut or other explicit material. the thought of me, being an adult who was in their early twenties (i’m 24 now) having minors interacting with my very explicit page felt wrong.

it felt as though i was being icky even though that was never my intention; i didn’t want to inadvertently harm minors with my fics (and somehow i felt i would) so i put the regulations on my blog for what i felt was their own protection.

(never mind the fact that when i was 14-17 i was heavily ingesting nsfw content and completely ignoring mdni warnings and never felt victimized in the slightest.)

this post has already turned into a monster so to digress, i will no longer be restricting minors from my blog. please feel free to interact with me in an appropriate manner and ensure that i am explicitly aware of your age. consuming my content (when i do post some) is also perfectly okay, as is interacting with it.

seeing all of this information made me realize that there are people in communities who will welcome minors to their pages only to prey on them like depraved wolves; and that is so, so sickening. i’ve always known that the internet is not a safe place for minors even though it should be.

so, much like rose, i want to create a safe space for the sturniolo fans that are under 18. you’re welcome here and you’ll be safe here, and you’ll have a friend in me <3 you can confide in me about anything, and i will listen. please just stay safe everyone. always keep your eyes peeled for anything that seems off or suspicious, and don’t hesitate to block/report someone who makes you uncomfy.

so, yeah, that’s all i really wanted to say. i also want to say thank you to everyone who has brought the information to light and exposed the pedo, you’ve done an amazing service and to all the victims, i pray that you heal and that you’re okay. you’re so strong and beautiful, and you’ll always have my support and respect! <333

[waywardstation]

It's the Third Anniversary of PLA!

It's kinda hard to believe the Game is out for 3 years now.

Also 3 years of a good part of the Fandom crying over Ingo's unfortunate fate and the whereabouts of his twin brother.

But it also means almost 3 years worth of your content as well!

3 years of laughing, crying, cheering and rooting for your Akari and Ingo whom she adopted as her uncle/fatherly figure.

3 years full of fun shenanigans, exciting stories and heartwarming and wholesome content.

I know with the release anniversary I am a little early but I wanna say thank you already for giving us so much wonderful content in those 3 years! Keep up the good work! (in your own pace and without stress)

WHAT A FANTASTIC THREE YEARS IT HAS BEEN!! It is wild to think that Pokemon Legends: Arceus came out three whole years ago today. I still remember having the game delivered to my door on that day, and opening it and going in blind cause there was literally like nothing out for the gameplay yet. Immediately ran into Ingo and how Irida described he had appeared here from another place like me, I didn't recognize him at all but in my head I kept going 'he looks like a crashed pilot or something he looks so cool', grew attached to him cause we were in the same situation but his was way worse but he was still kind, and also cause he looked cool to me haha. Only after he started talking about Emmet and Chandelure in Wayward Cave did I realize he wasn't a new character and I had seen him before.

Grew obsessed with his whole story, wrote my first fanfics ever and kept them to myself for weeks, but I wasn't seeing a lot of the content being made that I wanted to see at this point (it's understandable though the game was still so new) so I then made a tumblr account to finally post them, because I didn't realize AO3 had such a long account creation waitlist lol.

IT HAS BEEN THREE YEARS SINCE THIS BEGAN WOW.

I am so, so happy that you and other awesome people have appreciated almost three years of my silly self-indulgent content now, I still see some of the same people who came around my blog three years ago interacting with my stuff today, and that means so much. And it's been so exciting seeing people still jump into this fandom today, too!!

Thank YOU Neko, for being one of those people who have been here since the beginning and for always motivating me and being kind to me, and wishing me well and sharing such awesome ideas you have yourself!!! And thank you everyone who has interacted with this blog and taken the time to appreciate my content and be a friend to me ;v; <3

I am working on some stuff to post for the anniversary today. I have content ready, its just uncertain how much of it will be done haha. I'm cleaning up WIPs that have been aging in my docs!! Happy three years to Pokémon Legends: Arceus, my favorite game, so so important and special to me!!!!!!

[fuck-customers]

tw/cw: mentions of self harm (near the end)

tldr: im literally about to quit because i'm being used, essentially

i feel like an asshole (and probably am one) but isn't it real funny how i'm literally the only one at work who's never called out, never requested days off, covered everyone's shift when someone can't make it (at least once i didn't, but that's only because i didn't see it. i was asleep all day that day) but god forbid i call out because of inclement weather, suddenly people are out of town and can't make it or their phones are off and they pretend like they can't hear them ringing.

i apologize that i live an hour away, but there's literally a thick sheet of ice on the roads and i can't fucking make it. i am quite literally spinning out going ten miles an hour. it took me 30 minutes to get back up a hill to get back home. you have no reason to get pissed at me for it because i'm not the one controlling the weather??? and if i can't make it again today what's gonna happen???

like i'm putting my two weeks in. my mom and aunt agreed that i should, because she's not taking my safety into consideration and i've done nothing but cover for other people. nobody else is called in because someone calls out. it's always me. the one who lives over an hour away, no thought process taken, when there are two other people who both live within five minutes of the facility. one of them has a daughter (who's 9), and while i understand she needs to take care of her, she calls out so consistently that it's unfair, at this point. i love her to death but it's genuinely not fair at all how our boss is allowing this. she's also giving her all our guaranteed weekends, and she's (ie my boss) making her situation our problem, when it shouldn't be.

i'm also being used just to work holidays, because they KNOW i won't say no because of my car payment. i'm being overworked and i'm burning out so bad and i've only been there for four months. i literally am considering hurting myself just to be able to not go in. and it's been a long time since i've had ANY sort of ideation.

Posted by admin Rodney

[fromchaostocosmos]

When those alternative histories are presented what they are really saying is what if we, the rest of the world, got the bad ending too?

That is what they mean.

And when they do them they don't explore and accurately portray the reality of what such a world would look like.

They always ignore Imperial Japan and the horrors they did through out Asia and how that would have just kept going.

They ignore that the Nazi's long term goal was sterilize Black Europeans.

They ignore that if the Holocaust went on a few more years the odds are the entirety of European Jewry would have been totally wiped out as well as the Roma.

The reason is because when these these types of alternative history perspectives in which the Nazis/Axis Powers win are almost always told from a white christian able-bodied heteronormative cisgender one.

And who does not actually know the history. But wants to have that totalitarian vibe, but without having to do any of their own world building.

Because the thing is if done right and by the right person I do think a story that was set in a if the axis powers won type of thing could be an effective medium to show the reality of the brutality and just how much of the Nazi ideology was based on Judenhass, Jewish hate.

Because the the Judenhass is something that also gets missed a lot.

As well just how much people knew what was happening to the Jews and the Roma, and that is quite a lot.

To the Nazis and the Nazi ideology homelessness, poverty, queerness, disabled people etc. are all machinations of The Jew to undermine the Good and Righteous Society.

[The Jew creates poverty and that makes homelessness, and those who are homeless are puppets of The Jew and thus are bad. Anyone who is not in heterosexual relationship and having children are again a product of The Jew to destroy Society and that is also why The Jew created pornography. The Jew also creates for there to the impaired, infirm, and disabled to undermine the best of the genetic pool.]

That is the Nazi ideology and what they believed and what neo-Nazis still believe. I put that paragraph in brackets because I'm not quoting anyone I'm writing what they believed, but I want to make it clear that I am not directly quoting anyone and that, and this should be obvious, this is not something I believe in myself.

being a jew studying preholocaust european jewish history is just *mourns over what could have been, mourns over what could have been, mourns over what could have been, mourns over what could have been, mourns-*

[cosmique-oddity]

Music. I love music its very important for me and you guys dont even imagine how happy i am when i find "the one" who work insanely well with the idea i have of a character.

So now im just going to ramble about Mecha AU and characters and playlist.

Particulary Theme Songs >:D

Here we go

Vortex : Psycho Killer.

Yeaaaay i already shared this idea but i think the messy lyrics that doesnt rhyme and the fact that the singer seems to do drugs in the middle of the song fits Vortex. Its funny to hear that apparently it sound like the singer is yelling at himself. I can imagine Vortex alone in a room, yelling. And the others are confused and go in that room, having the idea of saving the poor people that cross the path of Vortex. But there is no one. Vortex is yelling at his reflection in a mirror. Also all the things about not being able to be relaxed. Cigarette do that. Its stressful.

"Run run run ruuun awayyy".

First Aid : *mischievously* No >:)

First Aid : Red Flags

Dont tell me this situation never happened with someone who was trying to date Felix before and thought he was just sweet and a kind medic. Forget the end. The random ran away and yelled. And i like the pairing Red Flags x Psycho Killer. Fits.

Swindle : Watch me Work/Figure n°9

Watch me Work is how people percieve Swindle. Well sort of. Its the struggle that are not very internal and personal. Its things that people can imagine about him. And i like the energy U.U

FIGURE N°9 ??? AAAOOHHH how can i convert you to my vision. Extracts time ! :

"But didn't realize instead of setting it free

I Took what I hated and made it a part of me"

Satisfied ? OK heres another :

"I can't separate myself from what I've done

Giving up a part of me

I've let myself become you".

HAH *gasp* first time i checked the lyrics i gasped. Thats Swindleeeee !!! Thats him. Talking to the hypothetical person who had his job before him.

Onslaught : In the End

Linkin Park being the theme song of the Combaticons fr. I think like all the things he tried, just failed. That all the things that happened, Vortex Death, Swindle changing post and losing himself into politics and faux semblants, Brawl and Blast Off leaving the base. Yeah.

Blast Off : Nobody's Listening.

LINKIN PARK AGAIN YEAH. Blast off is that silenced voice. He is quite quiet. And the real person that silence him, is himself. Then how do you wish for peoples to listen to you when you dont give yourself the chance to be listened at ?

Shockwave : The Line/Sing for Absolution

I have a lot of feelings about this, The Line song and Shockwave & Orion.

"Keep the memories of who i was before"

WHO DARED WRITING THIS LINE ????

Just listen to the other lyrics but hey trust me it kinda WORKS. Shockwave talking to Orion.

Also Sing of Absolution is for the case where Shockwave loved Orion.

Orion : Army Dreamers

Well yeah he died. *trying not to cry, lay down, cry a lot*.

Deadlock : Joga

"All that no-one sees

You see

What's inside of me

Every nerve that hurts

You heal

Deep inside of me

You don't have to speak

I feel"

EM field, Ratchet, healer. You know you know. You KNOW. *yell again*.

I realize im explaining myself very poorly.

Ratchet : Feeling Good.

Theres something about this song. But yes its about Deadlock. Theres a lot of version of this song (one that fit Jazz Prowl absolutely perfectly but not on Mecha AU. Michael Bublé ones)

This one, the tone of the voice being used, hoarse, match with his mental state. Tired.

But yet thats a positive song, very positive. Deadlock is giving him a new life, where he can rest a little, where he can slow down and enjoy....

And "you know how i feel". Is answering to the "You don't have to speak

I feel" of Deadlock song.

Roddy :> ! :

i made a playlist about him so i have a lot of songs. But my personal favorites are All Stars and Im Still Standing.

"You'll never shine if you dont glow"

And

"Looking like a True survivor, feeling like a little kid, im still standing".

Unkillable warrior.

Jazz : Jazzzzzzzzz. Immortals !

Immortals because "I'm bad behavior, but I do it in the best way".

And : "I try to picture me without you, but I can't

'Cause we could be immortals, immortals

Just not for long, for long"

Prowl :

hmmmmm Prowl i didnt really know. Had troubles. But there was this song about Jazz Prowl that was cool, I was Made for Lovin You

Blurr : Human

YES THIS IS SAD UUUH

LEAVE ME ALONE. I really think about Blurr like a fricking human human. I love him. Leave him alone.

<- when this is your favorite character so you absolutely cannot explain why because there is just too much emotionnal attachement towards him. But yeah go listen to the song. Its famous anyway.

Swerve : Cant Take My Eyes of You

Ah....and he tried ! Trust me he tried.

Muse version. Because muse.

@keferon this is my tribute to your amazing AU today

[tonysbed]

Secrets I keep | Part 8

Lando Norris x sister!reader

Daniel Ricardo x norris!reader

Max Fewtrell x norris!reader

summary: You and Max have been dancing around your feelings for years but jealousy gets the best of us all..

NOT PROOFREAD 😬

series masterlist | previous | next

-

yn

liked by landonorris, kellypiquet, charlesleclerc and 739.638 others

yn kika didn’t like her picture so she forbid me to post ours, had to replace it w a pic of me 😔

franciscagomez marry me

yn 💍

alexandrasaintmleux 😍😍

kellypiquet gorgeous 🫶🏻

yn youuu

danielriccardo I don’t see anyone complaining 👀

pierregasly Riccardo. Careful.

danielriccardo I didn’t mean it like that and you know it! 😬

pierregasly mhm

yn 😀

user can daniel fight??

user Need her omg

user the better norris

landonorris excuse me

yn you heard the people. Need me to spell it out for you??

landonorris 🙄🙄

-

“Can we talk for a moment?” Daniel says from the couch. You turn to him, take your drink and sit down “Sure. What about?” “Us”

You nod “We couldn’t really talk about everything last night, which is okay. I mean we were both tired and all” He starts.

“I just need to know.. Do you like me or am I really just the rebound?” He looks at you, hoping you wouldn’t say what he dreaded would be the answer.

You scrunch your eyebrows together “That’s not what this is.” “Then what is this? I don’t want you to let me fall once Fewtrell decides he wants you regardless of Lando. I need to know now so I can walk away. I need to walk away if that could happen.”

You squeeze your eyes shut and set down your drink “Daniel.” You look at him “I..” You sigh “You’re-“ Like in every other inconvenient moment, your doorbell rings “Oh for fucks sake” You get up and open the door.

“Oh. Max.” “Hey, uhm lando told me to come pick something up for him?” You nod “It’s a gift for a friends birthday. Come in” You lead him into the living room where Daniel sits.

Max nods and so does Daniel. “I’ll be right back. No stupid stuff” You point at Max “Why are you pointing at me?” He raised his hands “Because I don’t trust you” You squint your eyes “Don’t move.Ill be right back” You make your way to your bedroom.

Max sways on his feet, eyes wandering around the room. Daniel stares at him.

“It’s unfair” Daniel says coldly “Hm?” Max looks at him “She likes you and you treat her like crap. I want to give her the world and she’ll probably still choose you”

Max looks at him for a moment “You don’t know anything, Riccardo” “Don’t I?” “No you don’t. Otherwise you would say shit like that.” Daniel scoffs “Oh yeah? You keep acting like she doesn’t exist or makes it painful to be in her presence”

“It’s painful to be in your presence, not hers.”Max says, looking away from the australian.

“What have I done to you? You’re the one who rejected her.”

“In both of our better interest. Lando would’ve never spoken to her again.Do you even know how many times he told everyone how off limits she was? They’re each others person. I’m not taking that from them just because..just..” Max sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Because you loved her since she did.” Max looks at Daniel again but doesn’t move any more than that.

Silence filled the room, the two men are so busy staring at each other that they don’t notice you standing in the doorway. You don’t move, eyes locked on max.

“Here’s the package.” You say quietly, stepping towards Max. They both look at you in shock. Max starts to speak “Don’t. Please go.” He nods “See you” Max looks at Daniel and then at you before walking out.

You sigh and turn to Daniel “Did you have to do that?” He looks at you but doesn’t say anything “I think you should go too.” “Yn please” “No. You want an honest answer? I still like Max, yes. Doesn’t mean I don’t like you but if the possibility was there, I’d chose him.”

Daniel looks away for a moment “It happened so fast that I didn’t pull myself out of whatever we are. But this whole ‘I’m better than you’ thing? I’m not doing that. If this is how you act around Max it’s just a matter of time until Lando catches wind of it and I can’t have that.” Daniel gets up “Please, I would never tell Lando”

“Please go, Daniel. We can be friends, but we won’t work out romantically.” You say dryly. In his eyes is a flash of hurt “I need you to go, now.” He nods, gets his things and leaves.

-

-

yn added to their story

[cap 1: 🧡🧡 | cap 2: My new private chef btw]

-

“So what happened?” Lando leans on the kitchen Island while Carlos is collecting all the ingredients and tools he needs.

“I threw daniel out and..I broke off whatever it was between us” You say, still sounding unsure “What? Why? I mean it just started” “I..He’s not.. We wouldn’t work. We’ve got different expectations and.. I can’t live up to his. And that’s okay.” You say, now watching carlos pour in some flour.

“Well, if that’s what’s right for you, then that’s good” Carlos says, which Lando agrees to “This was way to fast paced” You say, leaning on your hand. Carlos looks up at you “That’s what it looked like from the outside too, sorry” You shake your head.

“Don’t be sorry, Carlos. It’s the truth.” Carlos nods and continues his pancake recipe. Lando looks at you “But you’re okay? Or do you want a hug?” “I always want hugs” You smile and open your arms. He chuckled and pulled you into his embrace “Yeah, as you used to say, you’re olaf”

You chuckle “I am! I love hugs!” Carlos chuckled at you two “There’s not a thing in the world that would ever break you two apart” You look at Carlos, who smiles.

“Well I hope not. Who’s gonna make ads for quadrant?” Lando asked teasingly. You slap his arm which he laughs at “I’m joking, i’m joking stop hitting me!” He pulls your wrists down and laughs.

“Asshole” “You love me” “I sadly do, yea” Carlos chuckled “Never ever changed.” He says as he pours the pancake mix into the pan.

Lando’s arm stays around you “You know I just want you to be happy, right?” You nod “Yeah, of course” “I don’t care who you’re with, you’re my sister” You nod again and Carlos eyes you both. You take a mental note of carlos look.

-

danielriccardo added to their story

-

pierregasly already going back??

danielriccardo smth came up

pierregasly okay okay

maxverstappen1 keep your head up, it’ll be fine

danielriccardo I know, I get it. Don’t worry abt me ;)

maxverstappen1 💙

-

A few days later you’re sitting in Landos apartment, Max sits on the other couch next to yours. Lando quickly went down to get your ordered food.

“I’m sorry” Max says, looking at you. You look up from your phone “What?” “For the daniel thing.” “He started it, Max” “I should’ve ignored him then” You shake your head “I may wouldn’t have told him to leave if it wasn’t for you. I..we would’ve never worked out for long.”

Max nods “Peace?” You smile “Probably easier, no?” He nods “Probably” Lando walks in with the food and sets it’s down on the table.

“I see you’re both still alive, that’s good” “We just decided on peace.” Lando’s eyes widen “Really? So.. no more fighting?” You chuckle “Well try” Lando nods “Okay, that’s good” You smile and look down before taking the food that lando hands you.

-

yn

liked by maxfewtrell, oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 738.534 others

yn and we’re back 🧡 (hurt them and I’ll haunt you in your sleep)

lilyzhneimer 😂🧡

yn nothing and no one will harm either of you 🤺

oscarpiastri thank you, yn 😂

landonorris loving my teammate more than me I see

yn not hard to

landonorris pls go back to being sad

yn fuck off

user MAX MENTION ONG

user where is daniel??😕

user yn is their number one shipper and defender 😂

user not jinxing anything this time, only manifesting for the best🤞

-

this is so short AND late but I had to scrap the other version and I still don’t like this but.. you’ll have to live with it.

Next part will be longer ☝️

[ashbabylittle]

At this point, it’s the most humiliating to admit things in text rather than taking embarrassing pictures. Like my heart is fluttering at the idea of writing out what I want.

So here goes -

I want to be cucked, I want to be put into diapers by my girlfriend/mommy, who teases and humiliates me for wetting my pants. I want her to keep me in diapers 24/7 and I want her to check to make sure I’m using my diapers.

I want to get a bedwetting chart and start trying to wake up wet more often. I want to feel the humiliating surprise of waking up soaking wet, and then be forced to put a cute sticker on the chart that proves I wet the bed. I want to wet up wet and get checked immediately. I want my mommy to say ��looks like the baby is finally wetting the bed” as she pats my full diaper without a glimmer of sexual tension.

I want my mommy to start going on dates, and to start bringing people back home. I want them to know that I’m there, to know that I am being cucked. I want to be humiliated in front of strong men. I want my tiny clit to be laughed at and pushed aside as I am ignored. I want to be teased and made to do tasks while my mommy gets plowed. I want to sit on my knees in my diaper, humping a pillow, while my girlfriend’s boyfriend cums inside of her. I want to feel pathetic when she feels like a woman.

I want to clean up the mess. I want to be teased even more after they’re done, reminding me about how I’ll never be able to have real sex again because I keep wetting my pants like a baby. I want them to come over and check me, and laugh at the thought that I pissed myself on the floor while they were fucking.

I’ll probably cum at this point from pure humiliation.

I want to be sat on my knees, embarrassed and ashamed when her boyfriend walks up behind me. I want him to position me on the bed and for him to pull back the waist band of my diaper. I want him to put his giant manhood down the back of diaper and fill it with his hot piss, grabbing the back of my hair while he does it. I want him to call me a cuck, I want him to treat me like a urinal. I want my mommy to watch and laugh.

[newtsgirl122]

01/28/2025

So Federal Aid to everything from the police to colleges and universities is on hold until further notice - originally supposed to take effect yesterday but it's only temporary. Now it will take effect on February 3rd. They want to make sure everything is following "Trump's policies, executive orders, and agenda in regard to DEI, woke gender ideology, transgenderism, and the Green New Deal"

So, I, a single mother in History, will probably be kicked from my program and denied funding for my education. Which just fuels my desire to learn more in the field of mechanics. But that should be my choice, not a forced second option.

I feel like I'm writing one of those letters in The Handmaid's Tale to be published for the rest of the world to hear.

What am I supposed to do?

How am I supposed to care for my daughter if I am being pushed from a higher education and eventually the work force? JD Vance clearly wants women to be staying at home making babies for Mother America.

We have officially hit stage 7 of the 10 stages of genocide.

I am a 21-year-old who has only ever wanted a quiet, peaceful life on the countryside with a little farm and an army of cats, rabbits, a duck or two, and maybe a dog. To raise my daughter and make sure she has every opportunity I was denied. And now I wonder whether I can keep her safe. How long until they come to rip her from my arms?

Is anyone there?

Can anyone see what is going on?

What do I do?

I can't abandon my family! And as much as I hate the father of my child for abandoning us, I can't leave him to die either! He has disabilities! (I blame my Dad for that instinct to protect those who have hurt me. I can't bring myself to stoop to their level and allow them to suffer. No matter what they have done to me. My daughter is part him too, and a part of me will always love him. If something happens to him, I'll grieve for the rest of my life.)

My family has fought for a place where they can live their lives in peace since the Revolution. My Grandpa Joseph Roberts died in the Revolutionary War! That cause he died for is being trampled over by these disgusting Wanna-Be dictators! My Grandpa Schmid whose parents came here from Switzerland prior to WWII gave up his vows of pacifism to fight Nazis!

It's so hard not to spiral and panic. I have lived my life full of anxiety and fear and when one cause goes away (my mother), another takes its place, and this time it's a threat to everyone around me too.

I can't help but wonder if this is going to be what puts me in the ground. That I will be one that is killed because of this pure evil running my country. My home! Will my daughter die too? Will she be left behind? Will she be safe?

So much unknown...

So much dread and fear...

[fairyboygenius]

everywhere, everything

simon “ghost” riley x original female character

maisie speaks: FINALLY. i am so sorry the ao3 author curse hit like right after i posted this and i haven’t recovered until now

cw: blood and bruises, mentions of childhood abuse, mention of animal death

@dwarvenagenda merry late christmas

Luckily for Simon, he ended up getting to see Allie sooner than he expected. Unluckily, he was the one who got injured.

It was a freak accident- the normally composed lieutenant slipping on the treadmill, his nose getting slammed into the track. Nobody needed to know that he had been lost in thought, missing a couple steps here and there. Daydreaming about a certain redhead with thick thighs he needed wrapped around his hips and mischievous brown eyes.

So, it really worked out.

Soap and Gaz flanked him on either side as he awkwardly limped to the medbay. Not only had he hit his head pretty hard and caused a nosebleed, Simon had somehow managed to badly sprain his ankle. It was embarrassing, really. He’d come back from the dead, survived gunshot wounds and bombings, but the fuckin’ treadmill took him out.

Allie was the first person they saw at the medbay, tending to a young private’s wounds. She was brisk and businesslike, avoiding eye contact even as the man tried to flirt. Simon held back a laugh as she looked at him blankly, voice professional and even.

The guy looked about 19. He leaned closer to Allie, and she just leaned back, face slowly slipping into a disgusted look. He was sort of blandly attractive, basic in his flirting. And she just wasn’t having any of it. A satisfied smirk tugged at the corner of Simon’s lips- and he immediately winced. It hurt to do anything with his face.

Allie looked up and immediately extracted herself from the guy. She visibly flinched looking at Simon’s face, the blood only stopped by a couple of tissues. The guy- who couldn’t have been more injured that a paper cut- tried to speak, but she pushed her way over to them, brow quirking.

“I leave you guys alone for one hour and this happens,” she joked. “What happened?”

Simon wouldn’t look up from the floor. “Fell on the treadmill.”

Allie let out a laugh, horror immediately filling her face as she clapped a hand over her mouth. “I’m so sorry,” she muttered, shaking her head as Soap and Gaz burst into laughter. “It just came out- okay, you know what? I’m gonna bandage you up, and then I’m gonna go kill myself. Give me a second, y’all.” She disappeared behind a wall, clearly upset with herself. If Simon had been able to, he’d have gotten up and gone to comfort her, but then his ankle throbbed and he thought better of it. Lola perked up, going to sit by the small exam table. She wasn’t quite tall enough to reach where Simon sat, but he reached out anyway, scratching the top of her head.

He had had a dog when he was a kid. Some mangy, flea-ridden mutt his mum picked up on the side of the road. Tommy had named the pup Dodger or some shit. Friendly little fucker, slept in Simon’s bed most nights. That is, before Dodger got shot in the head for “barking too loud” right in front of Simon and Tommy. He was nine. Tommy six.

“This is what happens when you don’t listen, ya hear?” his father had yelled. Simon remembered squeezing his eyes shut as hard as he could to hide the tears. He was scared of what would happen if he cried. Last time Tommy had cried, he had been punched so hard that his nose was actually broken. Simon still feels guilt deep in his stomach for lying to the ER nurse. He said Tommy fell.

Now, when they see dogs, it almost seems like they can smell the loss on him. He had read somewhere that dogs were good judges of character, but given the things he’d done, the people he’s hurt- he was skeptical.

It was a comforting feeling, though. That he was still worthy of receiving a pure, selfless kind of love, and giving it in return. His thoughts turned unbidden to Allie, as they often had in the past 24 hours. That’s a bit more selfish of a love- affection? desire? Infatuation? Just a pure want? He didn’t quite know what to call it. All he knew was she was potentially responsible for his broken nose- not that she’d know.

“Maybe this’ll be the story that gets told at your wedding reception,” Gaz had snarked, holding him up as they moved towards medbay. “Christ, you’re heavy. Maybe lay off on the beans.”

He had never particularly liked the idea of marriage. But with her…

You have never had a full conversation with her, Riley. Calm the fuck down.

“Okay.” He was startled out of his reverie by Allie coming back out. She was holding two ice packs, a bottle of painkillers, a small pillow, tissues, a nose splint, and a brace on her small silver tray. She looked at him, apologetic. “I really am sorry for laughing. How bad’s the pain? Out of 10, and be honest.”

Simon tried to force an indifferent shrug. He had his balaclava on still, he realized. “About an 8.” The words tumble out before he can stop himself. The truth, for once. Allie’s face twisted in worry. Shit.

“The sergeants left?” She looked around, giving him a wry smile. “Some friends.”

“Colleagues, at best.”

“Fair enough. So, full name? Just for the records.”

They went through his information pretty fast, and then she moved closer. If he could smell anything besides blood at the moment, lavender would be filling his nostrils, and he would try to grasp and soak it into his cells. Mitosis or whatever. She was wearing dark green scrubs- these ones were a bit tight, stretching across her generous chest and wide hips. Her stomach hung low, round and soft. He wanted to bite it.

“Okay, Ghost. I’m gonna need you to take the balaclava off so I can assess the damage. You can put it back on once I’m done; it’s probably soaked in blood anyway.” Allie gave him a coaxing look, like she was trying to get Lola to do a trick.

🎀

Okay, it’s not… bad.

Allie allowed herself to take in his unmasked face at that moment. Cleft lip, scars of various width and length, brown eyes and ridiculously long eyelashes. A nose that’s clearly been broken a couple of times. It’s an almost pretty shade of dark purple, swollen and matching the circles under his eyes. The blood isn’t gushing- at least, not anymore- but a steady trickle still drips down his face.

“I’m gonna touch your nose. Just to feel and see if it’s broken. Okay?” He let out an affirmative grunt. “Okay.” She reached out, feeling around for a break. He watched her with glassy, half-lidded eyes, the slightest sound of discomfort hissing through his clenched teeth.

Miraculously, Ghost’s nose was just the tiniest bit broken. Allie went ahead and secured the splint. And maybe her fingers lingered for the slightest bit too long on his face. Who was she to say?

The silence was comfortable, not strained in the way she often felt it was. Bedside manner was never something Allie had been good at. Making placid conversation about family vacations during procedures actually sounded like a nightmare, and it was a not insignificant factor in her choosing the military over nursing school. If soldiers wanted to talk at all- besides grumbling about having to be there, both men and women- it was incredibly rare. Of course, there were the chatters. And the flirts, like Private Johnson, who she’d politely turned down but still finished the job. That’s what she was there to do after all.

She finished securing the splint, handing him a small bottle of water and shaking out two pills from a bottle. “I got you the extra-strength Tylenol. We’ve been told to save the morphine drip for GSWs and the like, so this’ll have to do for now.” She watched to make sure he took the pills, totally not thinking about the way his lips wrapped around the bottle, how his hand was so big it dwarfed the tiny pills…

Snap out of it.

“Can you feel your ankle?”

He looked up at her, annoyance oozing from his pores, making even her aware of his emotions on the matter. “‘S not broken.”

“Oh, I’m sure it’s not. Just need to make sure. Can you wiggle your toes?”

He tried- trying and failing to hide a wince the entire time- and Allie bit her lip, looking at him sympathetically. “We’re gonna need to send you in for an X-ray.”

Ghost immediately shook his head. “Absolutely not.”

Allie took a deep, slow breath, trying not to get too mad at him. Not used to needing help. She could recognize the signs of a fellow abused kid- the cagey demeanor, resistance to being touched, the genuine surprise when someone is gentle with them. “I’m concerned you have a break, and if you do, just ignoring it and not figuring out what’s wrong could permanently damage the bones in your foot, which would likely get you a medical discharge. You’d be in pain for the rest of your life, walking with a limp and unable to do anything but pace around a mall- because we both know you wouldn’t go to PT unless you had a gun to your head. Or, you could go in for the X-ray and wear a cast for six weeks.”

“What about the mission?”

Of course he was concerned about that. “I’ve heard it’s being postponed anyway. Apparently we got bad intel, and they’re not actually in Chicago- but they’re talking about sending in the sergeants by themselves.” She shook her head, attempting to commiserate as he fumed. “I don’t know what Price is thinking sending them in without us.”

“Can they do that?” Ghost looked pissed- or maybe that was just the splint. His voice was high and nasally, his breathing still irregularly. He rubbed his forehead.

Allie wasn’t sure. She just knew what she knew- what Laswell had mentioned to her in a text during her first shift at the medbay. Soap and Gaz seemed like alright people, but you don’t survive in a military base without being able to identify weak spots. Soap is impulsive. Gaz is bloodthirsty- more so after the reveal yesterday.

She watched as Ghost scratched the top of Lola’s head. There was a clumsiness to it- someone who hasn’t touched or been touched gently for a long, long time. Maybe that’s why her hands could linger. Lola let out a content hum, pushing her head against Ghost’s hand. He kept scratching. Clearly, they had formed a bond.

“Your hands seem okay, at least.” The words just slipped out. He sat up like he’d been caught, and Lola whined. Allie winced apologetically. “Sorry, you don’t have to stop. Just making sure nothing else is injured.” She wiped her palms on her scrub pants. “I’m gonna call another medic in to do the X-ray, so you just sit back and let the pain meds kick in. Take off your shoe and sock, though, so we can get a good picture and check for any bruising. This’ll take, like, ten minutes max.”

The X-ray goes by without incident, with the reveal that Ghost (Simon? Just gonna call him Ghost) had not broken anything, it was just a particularly bad sprain and he had bruised at least five bones in his foot. Allie and the other medic-Delaney, Allie thought her name was- helped him put a boot on, taught him how to use crutches, and gave him strict instructions to rest. They sent the necessary information to Price before sending Ghost on his way. There was a lot of unnecessary touching- but from Ghost this time. A hand on her arm, a death grip on her shoulder when he first started the crutches. A clap on the back before he left. Her skin still burned where he had touched it.

When he left, he slipped on a surgical mask over his nose splint (the balaclava is going into the wash) and gave Allie a last, appraising look, before grunting in appreciation (of her?) and leaving. He was already fast on his crutches.

“So…” Delaney looked at Ghost one last time, studying his back, before turning to Allie. “What the fuck was that?”

“Was what?”

“He’s definitely into you.”

Allie felt her face flush. “There’s no way. It’s been, what, 30 hours?” And I don’t want to get my hopes up, she finished silently.

[luckymilkshakerebel]

Pieces of Us

Genre: angst, comfort

Cast: Han x reader

The rain fell steadily outside the window, creating a rhythmic symphony of droplets against the glass. The apartment was dimly lit, shadows flickering as I sat in the silence, the weight of everything pressing down on me. I stared at the empty space next to me, the place where he used to sit—where his warmth used to be. Han. The name itself felt foreign, almost painful, now.

It had been weeks since we last spoke. Weeks of silence after everything that had happened. He had tried to apologize, of course. Endless messages, letters, flowers—gestures meant to make up for the chasm between us. But I couldn’t bring myself to respond. Not yet.

Because the truth was, I didn’t know if I could ever forgive him.

---

The Fall

It started with a conversation. A fight, really. Small, ordinary things—misunderstandings, careless words—but they quickly escalated. Han said something thoughtless, something that cut deep, and I lashed back, sharper than I intended. And then came the moment that changed everything.

“I don’t know if I can do this anymore,” Han said, his voice quiet but resolute.

It wasn’t the first time he’d said it, but it was the first time it truly felt like a goodbye.

I sat frozen, my breath caught in my throat. “What do you mean?”

“I just... I feel like we’ve lost something,” he said, his eyes distant, as if already retreating from the conversation. “We’re not the same anymore.”

The words hung in the air between us, a dark cloud that neither of us could dispel. It wasn’t that we stopped loving each other—it was that we had stopped seeing each other.

---

The Discovery

A few days later, everything unraveled. I had been out running errands, only to return home to find Han’s phone on the kitchen counter, buzzing with messages. Out of instinct—or perhaps some deep-seated paranoia—I picked it up.

The messages weren’t innocent. They were flirty, personal, shared moments between him and another woman. Yeji.

My stomach twisted as I read through the conversations, each text more intimate than the last. He had been lying to me, deceiving me, building a separate world without my knowledge.

I confronted him the moment he walked through the door.

“Who is Yeji?” My voice was steady, but beneath it, there was a storm.

Han’s face drained of color. “It wasn’t supposed to happen,” he said quickly. “It was a mistake, Y/n.”

“A mistake?” I snapped, my voice rising. “You don’t just make mistakes like this, Han. You don’t cheat on someone you love without thinking about it.”

“I didn’t plan for it,” he said, his voice cracking. “It was a moment of weakness. You have to believe me.”

But his words weren’t enough. The damage was done.

---

The Silence

After that, the space between us felt cavernous. There were no more fights, no more arguments—just silence. He stayed, of course, still in the same apartment, still present, but unreachable. His apologies were constant, but they felt hollow. Every text, every flower, every gesture felt like a bandage over a wound that needed stitches.

And I couldn’t bring myself to forgive him.

“You don’t understand,Han” I said one night, my voice trembling. “You say you regret it, but that doesn’t erase what you did.”

“I know,Y/n” he whispered. “I know it’s not enough.”

---

The Struggle

Weeks turned into months, and still, Han tried. He followed me when I left the apartment, showed up at my favorite café with a cup of coffee. He left little notes in places I would find—on my desk at work, in the pages of my favorite book. Each note spoke of his regret, his longing to fix what he had broken.

“I love you,Y/n” he wrote once. “I always have. And I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you how sorry I am.”

But love, as I had learned, wasn’t enough. It couldn’t undo betrayal.

---

The Moment of Truth

One evening, after returning home from a long day at work, I found another letter waiting for me on the kitchen table. His handwriting was familiar, trembling with emotion. I sat down, the letter unfolded in my hands.

Y/n,

I don’t expect this letter to heal everything. I know it won’t. But I need to tell you how deeply sorry I am. Every moment without you has been a torment I don’t deserve. I betrayed your trust, and I’ve spent every second regretting it.

But love isn’t just a word—it’s an action. I’m not just saying I’m sorry; I’m showing you, every day, that I’m worthy of a second chance. I’m here, and I’ll be here, no matter how long it takes for you to find it in your heart to forgive me.

You are my heart, Y/n. Always have been. And I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust again.

Forever yours,

Han

---

The Healing

I read the letter several times, letting the words sink in. Han’s voice was raw, his vulnerability undeniable. And while a part of me wanted to believe him, to forgive him, another part—the one still holding onto the pain—was afraid.

Trust is a fragile thing. Once shattered, it takes time, patience, and unwavering actions to rebuild.

But Han didn’t stop. Every day was a reminder of his dedication to me, even when I didn’t respond. He stayed persistent, not just with words but with actions. He showed up on the doorstep with flowers when I least expected it. He remembered the smallest things—the way I liked my coffee, my favorite books, the songs that made me feel safe.

Still, the pain lingered.

---

The Turning Point

One evening, I found myself sitting on the couch, scrolling through old pictures of us. It wasn’t something I had done consciously; it just happened. Memories surfaced—moments of happiness, laughter, the things we once shared.

Tears welled up in my eyes. It wasn’t just the betrayal that hurt; it was the loss of everything we had built together. And as I sat there, staring at the photos, I realized something. Han wasn’t just apologizing for a mistake—he was trying to rebuild what we had lost.

Maybe, just maybe, that was worth something.

---

The Road Ahead

The next time Han came over, he didn’t bring flowers or gifts. He simply sat next to me, silent for a moment before speaking.

“I understand if you need more time,” he said, his voice steady. “I’ll wait as long as you need.”

I looked at him, really looked at him for the first time in weeks. There was no pretension, no desperation in his eyes—only hope, genuine and unwavering.

“I want to believe you,Han” I said softly.

“Then let me show you,Y/n” he replied, and for the first time in a long while, I saw the truth in his eyes.

Rebuilding trust isn’t easy. It takes time, and there are no guarantees. But sometimes, the very act of trying can mend even the deepest wounds.

Want to read more you can go to my MASTERLIST

[thatuselesshuman]

Six of Crows: Representation Done Right (in my opinion)

Six of Crows, for those who don't know, is a series written by Leigh Bardugo, who you may recognize from works such as Shadow & Bone and King of Scars (sister series to Six of Crows). Six of Crows is the second series in the collection, and tells the story of 6~7 teenagers with a chip on their shoulder and the ability to treat overthrowing a government figure like it's just another Tuesday.

It is one of my absolute favorite series ever, and I would gladly give my firstborn to Leigh if she asked. It has many things going for it: beautiful plot, angsty teenagers, sad backstories that spell out peak fiction, and amazing characters. In this Tumblr essay, I'm going to focus on that last point, mainly in regards to how representation ADDS to the characters, instead of feeling like a shitty Target t-shirt during pride month (forced and hella cheap).

Disclaimer: I am in no way qualified to be talking about this. I literally have just about every privilege imaginable except being a rich old man. However, I do read a lot and love literature in all shapes and sizes, so know that my yaps are coming from a good place.

—————————————————————————

Now, with that out of the way...

The 6 main characters of Six of Crows (SoC for short), are Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, and Matthias. They are all very different, so I'll go through them one by one and explain what, why, and how representation.

Kaz Brekker:

So, in terms of usual representation, Kaz is one of the more basic of the group. He's not a minority of any noticeable kind, like LGBTQ+ or a POC (person of color), but he is physically disabled. Due to an accident, Kaz walks with a limp and uses a cane.

Now, I know some people who would say that physical disability isn't as important when it comes to representation, since it's "unrealistic" for a disabled person to be kickass. And to those people I would say: have you ever met a disabled person? Like, genuinely, I'm physically disabled myself and use a cane much like Kaz, and while I could never pull off some of the crazy shit Kaz does, some of the strongest people I know have worse disabilities than me. You and I do not live in a world where a disability determines someone's worth.

And, to that point, I think Leigh proves this exceedingly well. Kaz isn't strong in spite of his disability, he is strong because of it. His disability isn't something shameful or something he needs to hide, it's something that people actively fear. He'll be the first to call himself a cripple, and the last to seem weak in any right.

But if that's all it was, the representation would be decent, but nothing special. What makes it special is that it's realistic. There are certain things Kaz can't do. A lot of simple things like walking cause him pain. In spite of this, however, Kaz wouldn't get rid of his disability. In the story, when given the chance, he chooses to keep it. Why? Because he turned a weakness into a source a strength. Kaz is literally my role model for this reason.

To conclude this, I'll leave you with a quote that can explain this way better than I ever could.

"There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong, and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken."

Inej Ghafa:

Past Kaz, I debated what I would talk about with each person. Most of them have multiple things that count for representation, which is good, but I decided to chose one for each. For Inej, I decided to focus on her Suli background.

(I'm not even going to lie, this one was the most challenging for me to write bc I wrote it last 😭)

In media, a lot of stories fall into the trap of saying the same three things about POC: 1) they aren't Caucasian 2) They have a life (sometimes) 3) they aren't white. Aka, what we would call the "token black character." No substance, usually feels very forced and fake. These type of characters seem to be written in purely for "representation" reasons, which actually leads to the representation being trash because the character's feel like corporate cutouts instead of people.

Inej, on the other hand, has a culture that feels alive. The Suli culture has conscious thought put into it on behalf of Leigh. They have proverbs and a language, they have costoms and a tangible effect on Inej. She is Suli and she is more interesting for it. Her culture doesn't feel tacked on or forced because it's a staple part of who she is, there is no Inej without the Suli.

And that's not to say that's Inej's entire character, as that wouldn't be good good either. No, Inej is many other things too. She's a girls girl, a fantastic acrobat, she's scarily good with knives, she's kind, she can be a bit scary, she's so much more than her ethnicity but that, is also a distinct part of her character. Her depth is not her ethnicity/culture but her ethnicity/culture is a part of her depth.

Jesper Fahey:

Jesper! We all love Jesper, right? I could talk about him being a different ethnicity like Inej, but I'd say a lot of the same things. Instead, I've decided to focus on our favorite bisexual disaster.

Now, for those unawares (i see you lerkers who haven't read SoC), Jesper is a bisexual character who is in a relationship with another character, Wylan. They're relationship is very wholesome, and their kiss scene is one of my favorites in the book (topped only by Kanej, sorry Nina and Matthias). I could just spend this part of the essay waxing poetic about their relationship, but that's no fun is it?

The main thing I want to focus on is how SoC treats their relationship (ie LIKE ANY OTHER RELATIONSHIP). They don't make a big deal out of it AT. ALL. past the normal relationship things. Hell, Kanej's relationship is treated as more different because they're both angsty teenagers, and that relationship is straight. The biggest trap authors fall into when it comes to LGBTQ+ relationships is that they make them either something super taboo or something so stereotypical that it hurts to read. Even though stories where the relationship is taboo are valid because of worldly bigotry, it's equally as important to stories where the relationships are just a fact of life, same as any other romantic entanglement.

In the same vein, I also want to mention the lack of stereotypes. We all know the stereotype right? One macho strong guy who's super masculine and one submissive (usually feminine-coded, go figure) guy who is typically younger, but that's more interchangeable. I, among others, hate these stereotypes for many reasons. Leigh, thankfully, avoids all of it masterfully. Yes, Wylan is a bit more reserved, but he is in no way weak. Jesper also isn't a strong macho guy, he's thin lanky teenager who likes to gamble and shoot things. He's not the super 'dominant' one in their relationship, because their relationship is EQUAL.

In conclusion, Jesper, in his relationship with Wylan, manages to dodge most-if-not-all typical downsides that would lead to certain elements to being bad or a bit bland representation. Jesper doesn't feel like a poster board LGBTQ+ guy they slap on shitty political add campaigns, he feels like a real, breathing person that just happens to have a (healthy!) relationship with a guy.

Wylan Van Eck:

I know I talked about Wylan some in Jesper's, but for this part I want to focus on Wylan's dyslexia.

In SoC it is explicitly stated that Wylan in unable to read because of severe dyslexia, leading to him being neglected/abused by his father and eventually him running away to join the Crows.

Now, let's start with the practical side of the equation. Although, as I said in Kaz's section, a disability doesn't define you, it is an unfortunate reality that some people try to use that to define you. This is unfortunately the case in Wylan's story, where his dad neglects/abuses him, sends his mother to a psych ward, then ultimately tries to have him killed. What I like about SoC, however, is that it doesn't just say "that's just how the world is, suck it up" and move on. No, it goes so much further.

During the course of the story, Wylan grows from believing his father and feeling shame about his condition, to using it as an accepted part of himself. He grows as a person not because of his shitty father, but in spite of his shitty father. Many people, having seen Wylan's story, may say that Wylan's father is what made him who he is, and therefore Wylan's father was necessary. You know what SoC says to that? It gives those people a big ol' middle finger.

Wylan, in order to grow in both self-confidence and happiness, had first get AWAY from his father. Wylan isn't who he is because of the abuse he endured, no, the abuse was a hindrance to his growth. He was only able to become who he was after he had people who cared about him and truly didn't care what others deemed "shameful" about him.

These things both make a statement about how society treats people who are different, and makes Wylan seem like a real person. It is simply not reality that a totally fine person can spawn out of a broken, abusive household, but it is also not often that the person is broken forever with no other qualities. Wylan is not his dyslexia or his trauma, but instead he is a normal boy with many interests and tendency to blow things up that had to grow out of his self-hatred sowed in him by his father.

Nina Zenik:

The wise, the woman, the icon, Nina Zenik. I love Nina to a fault. She is one of the few that her story extends outside of the Six of Crows/Crooked Kingdom timeline into King of Scars/Rule of Wolves. That's not to say we don't see the others, but a good chunk of her story is seen in the KoS series. Now, even though this is the case, we're going to mostly focus on Nina in SoC/CK with how she artfully uses and discards gender roles at her whim.

We all know the traditional 'gold standard' for women, right? Blonde, ultra feminine, skinny, and above all: submissive to men. There's nothing explicitly wrong with most of these attributes, but when they're forced on everyone? That's when it becomes a problem. Through Nina, Leigh shows that, while most of these attributes aren't inherently harmful, you can still be a badass while not exactly fitting the mold.

Nina is a bold and outspoken girl with brunette hair, a plump body, and a love for all things food and fashion. She's the first to tell Kaz that his haircut is ass and the first to down every waffle in the room. Not only are these attributes realistic to women, since I too love myself some waffles, they also break the traditional 'gold standard' while still keeping Nina feminine.

Some authors, in the pursuit of breaking gender roles, make a super tomboy character that basically forsakes being a woman. While those people do exist and are valid, most women aren't like that. I don't think those characters are always good representation because they aren't breaking gender roles, they're just reinforcing the idea that you have to act like a man to get anywhere in life.

Nina is good because she still has feminine attributes. She loves fashion. She's a girls girl. She's sexy and she knows it. While you don't have to have those attributes to be feminine (obviously), it shows that you don't have to abandon your feminity to be badass.

Matthias Helvar:

Matthias! Some of you are wondering how I'm going to connect Matthias to representation, aren't you? He isn't a POC, LGBTQ+, or even disabled in any (canon) way. He is like me, truly the default settings of the world. This seems to disqualify him from the representation talk, but I would disagree. He aids the representation not by being apart of it himself, but showing how two different cultures can coexist, even with opposing values.

Matthias is from the country of Fjerda, which is characterized by it's highly traditional ideas about women, religion, and just life in general. They believe that women should be subservient to men, and that Grisha are witches that should be killed without mercy by a special army called the Drüskelle. And guess what? Matthias just so happens to have been raised as a Drüskelle!

Throughout Matthias/Nina's backstory, Matthias first captures Nina as a Grisha but then falls in love with her. Nina soon 'betrays' him and they have a falling out, but they eventually rekindle their relationship (that was a small no nuance summary for a huge arc spanning multiple books, so I suggest you read SoC/CK if you haven't). Through this arc, we see Matthias go from bigoted to acceptance WITHOUT losing his culture or religion.

I think a lot of stories get the bigotry -> acceptance pipeline wrong in that a lot of the time, a character completely loses their culture and/or religion in the process. While that does happen sometimes, it shouldn't be the meta. Not being a bigot boils very simply down the principle of not being an asshole, regardless of your culture. I have my stakes in this as I'm Christian, yet here I am making a whole Tumblr essay on representation. You don't have to lose your entire culture to not be an asshole.

Leigh does this very well with Matthias, as by the end of the story, he's still a Fjerdan and still wholeheartedly believes in Djel, but he's changed in that he's no longer an asshole about it. He still has that part of him, just without the added bigotry. My favorite part of his arc is at the very end when he tries to convince a fellow Drüskelle that he doesn't have to live that way. He coexists and accepts other cultures without losing himself, and that's very important when it comes to representation.

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In conclusion, what makes representation good representation is that it adds to the character, not takes over the character. No one wants a character where their only character trait is that they have dark skin or that they like someone of the same gender. They want depth, they want humanity. Representation isn't a crutch to add depth to an otherwise blank character but a tool that can reflect real life in the way that none of us are exactly alike, and we don't have to be.

[bitchface24-7]

Hi, im truly sorry to bother you, I apologise. But I admire your work and I have drank all of it attentively these days to escape from reality, you are truly a gem <33333. Which I don't know how to express my gratitude for it. I have been struggling my entire life to see myself worthy of gaining or receiving love, I have been insecure about my body. And after I read your fic plus size girls x jayvik I swear I cried in admiration. I just want to know if you could write a fanfic with jayvik in love with a curvy tall girl (I'm 1.78cm, I know it's not much, but I have been feeling like absolute fucking garbage lately). I truly hope all your dream come true, your pets live longer and a fucking raise. I love you, mon cherie <333 0w0

HATERS GONNA HATE - JAYVIK X READER

synopsis: your whole life you've held insecurities, as most women do. You've always been too tall, too “large”, too much. It's weighed you down for too damn long. Your two boys make you realize your beauty, the beauty you've always had. They just took the wool off of your eyes.

warnings: negative self talk, talk of insecurities, childhood bullying, comfort, compliments, fluff, suggestiveness, pre-established relationship, Grammarly is my beta

genre: m/m/f

p.s. You're so sweet omfg 🥺🥺 I love you too!! I hope this fic comforts any and all who need it. I'm not tall (160cm/5’3) but I am thicker/curvy/fat (whatever term you want to use) like I've cried in changerooms since I hated how something looked on me/how I looked. Its peaks and valleys of self-love; and if my stories make y'all feel beautiful, I've done my part. Its also cathartic to me as well.

You've always been the odd one out. You were taller than all your classmates, you went through puberty first and got breasts before all your peers, you filled out and got curves much sooner than expected. Some may call this a blessing, to you it's a curse.

Now as an adult, you're taller than most men around you. You have a curvy figure yes, but it's not like the surgical, edited versions seen magazines and billboards.

You have nice breasts, but they're not defying gravity levels of perky, you have a smaller waist compared to your hips and shoulders, but you have rolls when you sit and twist your body, you have long legs, but they're not sculpted to perfection. You're just a woman.

A woman who hates what she sees in the mirror sometimes.

You nitpick insecurities others wouldn't even see, especially the people who love and care about you.

Jayce and Viktor think you're a goddess amongst men. That you're perfect, both inside and out. They love everything about you.

They love that you’re close in height to them, so they're not bending over to love on you (especially Viktor with his bad back), Jayce is obsessed with your hips and waist, and Viktor would like to die suffocated between your breasts.

So when they see you at your vanity after waking up and nitpicking yourself, well… that just won't do.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Here you are, sitting at your vanity in a large t-shirt and undies, nitpicking away at yourself. Your hair is tossled from sleep, your eyes glittering as you look over yourself. Your hands drag across your face, into your hair, and over your body. Your mind repeating awful statements said about you over the years.

You're so engrossed in being mean to yourself, you don't see Viktor come up behind you and place your morning coffee onto your vanity.

“What’re you doing?” He asks his voice thick due to just waking up. His accent is heavy and heady. You feel your face heat up at his question, not expecting to be caught and the tone of his voice makes your heart flutter.

You freeze slightly, before looking at the handsome man in the mirror, “Just… looking at myself. Nothing to worry about.”

“In appreciation, I hope. Your furrowed brow and pout give you away my love. What’s on your mind?”

A sigh escapes your lungs as you grab your coffee and take a small sip, contemplating your words, “Am I— too much for you two?”

Viktor guffaws at that, his eyes wide when he looks at you, “What on earth are you talking about?”

“Y’know… too much. Too tall, too curvy, too chubby. Just— too much.”

“Who on earth put that ridiculous idea into your head?!”

A light incredulous laugh leaves you at the sight of an enraged Viktor. He looks like a mad cat.

“Society, classmates, magazines, and ads. I'm not… the picturesque standard of beauty.”

Viktor's lips narrow at your dejected tone, “You are the most beautiful women I have ever had the pleasure of seeing. You're personality is sparkling, and your physical beauty makes me question how a goddess like you could love a man like me.”

You whip around at that last statement, anger clear on your face, “A man like you? What do you mean.”

“A cripple. A poor man from the Undercity. A man who is weak, and ill, and not good enough for you.”

A snarl is what he gets in return for his statement, “Who told you that?! I’ll rip their tongue out for such disgusting comments! You’re wonderful Viktor, I wouldn’t change a damn thing about you!”

A knowing look is what you get and your anger immediately quells. Oh that sneaky, smart son of a bitch.

“So— now you know how Jayce and I feel about you. People, society in general are cruel. Our minds our biggest enemy. Jayce will agree with me.”

“Agree with you on what?” Said man asks as he enters the bedroom, a sleepy look on his face as he scratches his toned stomach and sips on his coffee, “What’s taking you two so long? We need to decide on breakfast and I’m getting hungry.”

You look away as Viktor cocks an eyebrow, “Our darling thinks she’s “too much” for us. She’s been ruthlessly nitpicking herself in the mirror.”

A loud gasp is all you hear before Jayce goes into a tangent, “Who told you that?! Give me their names and I’ll black list them from the council! What on earth are you talking about?! Too much? Too much! I’d say there’s not enough!”

“That’s cause you’re greedy sweetheart.”

“Shut up Viktor, my point still stands! You’re perfect babe. Ignore the haters, they hate because they’re miserable in their own lives and we all know the saying. Misery loves company.”

Jayce walks over to you and places his mug next to yours, his frame towering over you as he brackets your back and puts his hands on your thighs, “I’d die if you changed anything about yourself, your legs especially. Don’t take away my earmuffs. I’ll cry.”

You laugh as Viktor joins in and cups your breasts, you gasp at the feeling of his cold hands breaching underneath your shirt. “And don’t take my pillows away. I’ll be devastated and my sleep schedule will be shit again.”

The snort you let out is anything but lady-like, but they got their point across. They love you no matter what, even if they have favourite body parts of yours.

You smile at the two of them through the mirror and their eyes lock onto yours, before looking at each other; having a silent conversation.

“Y’know what… breakfast can wait. I’m hungry for something else.” Jayce states as he looks at you, his eyes big and pleading. His hands travelling up your thighs, over your undies, and he grips your exposed waist.

Viktor chuckles when he squeezes your breasts harshly and you gasp at the sensation, “I agree Jayce. What do you say my love, are you willing to indulge your two boys?”

You nod and before you know it, Jayce has tossed you onto the bed. Your coffee and breakfast completely forgotten as Jayce lowers himself in between your legs as Viktor sits behind you; his hands removing your top as he fondles your breasts and kisses your cheek and neck.

You’re their goddess, and they’ll worship you like one as well. They’ll continue to worship you until the end of time. Your devotees… How lucky you are.

Society sucks. Beauty standards suck. We’re all beautiful, expect we don’t see it. It’s time we pull the wool off of our eyes and see ourselves as we truly are. We’re perfect. No need to change anything. I hope y’all liked this, it made me feel quite a bit better. Love ya ❤️