#which really makes me think all of this was to just ship him off to tattooine so we can focus on his carbon copy in shining armor instead.

[hazamacore]

The Interweaving of Desmond & Eloise

an analysis on how they have been established as a pair

Collection of all essays so far

At the stage we are currently at, the end of chapter one with around thirteen hours of content to watch and even more outside of direct canon to examine, Desmond and Eloise have established themselves as a pair in a similar vein to Damon and Eva or Mark and Jett. Their pairing feels obviously deliberate and indicative of deeper meaning, which we’ll no doubt see more of as the game proceeds. In this essay I want to cohesively lay out all of my current thoughts on them - developed from TikTok posts I have made (x / x / x) with other newer points from my notes that do not appear in said posts. 

While I personally enjoy their relationship in a romantic context, this is not intended as a ship post, and you are of course free to interpret it how you like. It’s just looking at how they relate to each other as characters and their canon relationship and giving my thoughts on what that means for them! Regardless of how you interpret the context of their relationship, that these two are being set up as close is undeniable.

SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER ONE AHEAD!

Firstly, I want to establish the significance of pairs in Project: Eden’s Garden overall. So much about the game circles back to pairs: the killing game ‘officially’ ending when only two remain, everyone waking up in pairs, Toshiko being the Ultimate Matchmaker, Tozu and Mara being a pair, bunking in pairs, splitting off into pairs… and much of this can be put down to the theming of the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. With everyone’s animal motifs, another Biblical story in Noah’s Ark comes to mind. The point is that the abundance of pairs is both relevant and very deliberate. 

Fundamental design

From the moment we first see them in the train CG, Desmond and Eloise are together. When we first formally meet them, they are the only ones in the courtyard. They are a pair from the beginning in the same way as Mark and Jett and Wolfgang and Grace. 

And, on first looks and first meetings, I’ll begin my thoughts on how they as individual characters relate to each other as foils with their visual designs and names. Being fictional characters, there was an entire design process filled with intent that went into creating them, and I really think Desmond and Eloise were created with the other in mind to make them both contrast and complement each other. 

Their contrasting colour schemes of blue and black VS red and white immediately relate them to one another and put them in proximity of one another. Through their colour schemes they have been designed to be seen next to each other. 

It is also their colour schemes that give instant insight into how they contrast each other in personality. Desmond’s blue suits his cool, composed disposition, his observant nature and how, although he is more reserved, he still integrates with the group and is a primary contributor. Throughout the situation and throughout all the suspicion he endures based on his talent, Desmond remains calm, in part, I think, because he knows he cannot afford to appear angry lest it confirm people’s biases. Considering how prominent that idea of prejudice has been with Desmond so far, I also heavily doubt him being designed as Black is coincidental or without connotations. Especially when you consider just how irrational the suspicion and assumptions placed upon him are. 

(Desmond’s third Free Time Event, talking about how difficult a confined space like the academy is for him) Damon, internally: And yet, that cool demeanour of his never falters - even when talking about his situation. Is this what he means when he talks about discipline…?

Conversely, Eloise’s red speaks to her being more volatile - prone to outbursts of fear, panic and, notably, rage. It is interesting to me that Eloise’s colour scheme is primarily white/grey, with her reds as secondary and, in her clothing, beneath her uniform. But her eyes, the “windows to the soul”, are red. Eloise at first impression seems only timid, and this leads both characters and audience alike to assume that she is weak, and she is also reserved and rather closed off especially in conversation with the likes of Damon. But Eloise has a strong fortitude that manifests later in chapter one as she gains confidence in the setting - standing up to and threatening Grace, leading the accusations towards Grace in the trial, and her Free Time Events most notably. Her red is closed off until triggered. Damon notes that “the most confident she’s ever sounded” is when she’s expressing her belief that the runners of the killing game should receive the death penalty which so starkly contrasts with Desmond’s focus on resolving things peacefully. Similarly to Desmond being Black, I also heavily doubt that Eloise being designed as fat is without connotations regarding this theme.

The meanings of their names push this even more blatantly. Desmond’s name is of Anglo-Saxon origin and means “Great defender” which adds to how spelled out the theme of guarding, protection, defence becomes in his character during chapter one - notably in relation to himself and Eloise. In his blackmail, which I will go into in more detail later, it explicitly says he “guards the only one he trusts”. This defence finds contrast with offence in Eloise’s name being of French and Teutonic origin meaning “Fierce warrior” which speaks to how assertive she becomes when pushed. Her Free Time Events serve as good indication with how she says outright to Damon that she plans to fight back if targeted for murder and expresses anger when he starts “prying into [her] personal life” in an outburst of “It’s none of your f-fucking business!”. Down to their names they present as foils.

Linking to this talk on personalities and first impressions is how these two contrast in how they are perceived by other characters and audience alike - their shared theme of “judging a book by its cover”. 

While Eloise has a talent centred around combat and wielding a blade, she is not nearly suspected the same way Desmond is due to her appearance as pale and soft in conjunction with her timidity, with the decision to make her fat adding to this as well. She is actually afforded first impressions based on personality, where Desmond is instead defined by potential threat in his marksmanship - the first thing Wolfgang ever says to him is, “With all of those weapons, I must ask…you…haven’t killed anyone, have you?”, and Eva’s belief that everyone is out to get her and have marked her as an easy target merges with preconceived notions about Desmond’s character and talent to lead her to assert that telling Desmond about his blackmail could “put [her] in danger”.  Contrasingly, in building up to their confrontation of Grace, Damon perceives Eloise as “bumbling”, “uncoordinated”, and not of “any help in a verbal shutdown”, and he proceeds to be utterly proven wrong - with the use of “uncoordinated” in reference to the Ultimate Fencer giving great indication of his poor judge of character. This contrast, then, makes it notable how they stick together and understand each other in a way others do not. 

(RE his bunking idea: Eloise understands what Desmond’s intentions are while others assume ill of him) Cassidy: I mean - hey, don’t expose us! That’s unfair! Desmond: Hold on, I’m not trying to expose anyone…! Eloise: Um, I think I get what he’s trying to say. Eloise: You just want everyone to be honest with each other…so we can cover all our bases…right? Desmond: Yeah…that’s right… (During the chapter one investigation as Grace guards Wolfgang’s room and denies everyone entry) Desmond: That’s what I tried telling everyone else, but they pretty much gave up. Jett and Mark went to the dining hall, Diana went to the laundry room, and Toshiko and Ingrid went to the courtyard.  Desmond: Eloise and I, though…we’re not gonna let this slide.

When going through their Free Time Events, it becomes clear that Desmond and Eloise even contrast each other when it comes to their backgrounds and honing of their talents. Desmond comes from a notably wealthy family who have a history of Ultimate Marksmen - that talent being as hereditary as literal genetics. From the start, Desmond has been showered in opportunity - he mentions having an expansive field that puts the academy’s courtyard to shame, a personal shooting range, a personal tennis court, and a personal swimming pool. He used to attend competitions on a local and regional scale until he got the opportunity to compete in the Olympics. 

Comparatively, Eloise had no such influence when it came to getting into fencing and simply joined a club and her honing of her talent was defined by a lack of opportunity. She rose through the ranks via forfeits - her opponents were so afraid they point-blank refused to fight her and so she had to take matters of improving into her own hands by practicing alone or with her teacher. Her lack of opportunity stems from how her family is certainly not as well-off as Desmond’s and she comments on giving her prize money to her mother and sisters. This is a point of similarity between the two - they both disregard the money they have earned through their talent for themselves and instead place focus on their families. Desmond cares more about making his parents proud, and Eloise cares more about giving the money to her family. 

Beyond every aspect in how Desmond and Eloise foil each other is how similar thematically they are in a way that allows them to understand and trust one another in a way they don’t seem to lend to anyone else. They understand that the other is perceived by strangers in a way that doesn’t necessarily align with their fully realised selves, Desmond’s calmness soothes Eloise’s volatility, Eloise’s sword takes the front while Desmond’s guns and bows take the rear - they are an inversion of each other and interwoven as a pair.

To finish off with their fundamental designs, official art for Project: Eden’s Garden is, in my opinion, interesting to look at. Desmond and Eloise are depicted next to or interacting in some way with each other in every piece of official art they share which pushes them further as a ‘pair’. It really emphasises how rarely in-game they’re apart - with the only instances of that being during nighttime, every free-time after the first one, and most prominently the Prologue’s investigation. Otherwise, they are always at least in the proximity of each other. I don’t think official art and seeing which characters appear together the most and how exactly they are interacting is insignificant at all - two sets of Halloween official art stand out to me as entwining Desmond and Eloise by their talents. In one, Desmond is dressed as Link from the Legend of Zelda and wielding a blade and, in the other, Eloise is dressed as Artemis from Greek Mythology - the Goddess of the Hunt who was known for her archery, a choice that becomes especially interesting once you remember that Artemis’ fellow archer brother, Apollo, was heavily associated with swans. 

Blackmail, blackmail

“With his weapons at hand, Desmond guards the only one he trusts.”

Since I posted my initial interpretations of this on TikTok, I’ve seen more discussion on it, and I don’t think it is controversial at all to suggest that the “only one” referred to here is Eloise. The only other options, to me, are this “only one” being someone outside of our main cast or Desmond himself. However, I have found myriad evidence that points towards it being Eloise that I’ve spread across different videos on TikTok but can now relay all in one place here. 

First, what is meant by “weapons”? As the Ultimate Marksman, Desmond has access to guns and bows in the literal meaning of that and this is how Eva, Damon and everyone else interprets it. It is also true - Desmond is always depicted with his quiver slung over his back, so he does indeed have his weapons at hand. However, there is another way of looking at this - Desmond’s “weapons” do not have to be literal. 

During chapter one’s trial, Grace admonishes everyone for “trusting Desmond so easily” after he defends himself from accusations based on the taser gun and Damon has the option of commenting on Desmond’s charisma that persuades people to trust him (or… “charm” as he puts it). Desmond’s “weapons” could refer to his rhetoric, especially with how he utilises the angle of ethos in comparison with Damon’s logos and Diana’s pathos - that being, focusing on getting across and defending his character, something that as previously discussed Desmond is exhaustively used to doing. His “guard” could manifest in him coming to this “only one”’s defence in verbal bouts just as much as it can be taken literally, something that we have in fact already seen if you subscribe to the idea of that person being Eloise.

Next, the meaning of “trusts” should be dug into. It is easy to assume that because Desmond behaves cordially with everyone and seems to possess a vested interest in getting everyone out of the killing game and to safety this means he is openly trusting in the way Diana is, but there is a lot once you start looking that proves otherwise. Desmond does not vehemently deny the possibility of murder like Wolfgang or Diana do but instead accepts the reality of their situation and approaches it with the knowledge of murder in his mind. He is against exploring the Alpha Sanctuary due to whatever Tozu has hidden within it, he takes note of the dangers of the pharmacy and what drugs could possibly be used to murder - even saying that “we should all start paying more attention to our food” - and is the one to come up with the bunk buddies idea due to the broken locks. Desmond does not trust that his peers absolutely will not be tempted by murder. Most illuminating is during his second Free Time Event when Damon tries to use the trustworthiness of the other students as a debate topic and Desmond becomes noticeably uneasy and closed off. 

Damon: How about… we debate the trustworthiness of the other students? Desmond: Huh…? What do you mean? Damon: Isn’t it self-explanatory? You and I argue about whether or not the others are trustworthy. Desmond: Uh… I don’t know, dude. I’m not really comfortable with that. Damon: Why? Desmond: W-what do you mean why? I can’t just say my… (own emphasis) Desmond: I mean, I can’t just throw doubt at people for no reason. 

Despite this, he still wants said peers to trust him. His motivation to escape the killing game and prevent murder, I believe, is genuine - however, he remains beneath the veil of hypocrisy in how he expects everyone to trust him without him trusting them. 

So, how does this link to Eloise? 

From the prologue, the theme of Eloise and Desmond being each other’s alibis and backing each other up is established. Wolfgang asks Desmond to keep a shaken Eloise company and he does so for the duration of all the other introductions. When the fake body of Cara is discovered, Eloise insists that she heard no screaming from the courtyard nor did anyone run out, and calls on Desmond to back her up, which he does. This is the first exchange of trust and reliance between them, and it only strengthens during chapter one. 

The first major instance is in relation to Desmond’s idea of sleeping in pairs. Knowing his distrust towards his peers and that he has this one person he has an interest in protecting, it is notable both that he would be the one to raise concerns about the broken locks and that he would proceed to input that, “As the one who suggested the idea, I’d say we just pick our buddies ourselves-”. Desmond wanted to choose his bunk buddy, ostensibly so he would be able to more readily “guard” them, and this, I think, is crucial as evidence that the “only one he trusts” is someone among the class. While he doesn’t respond outwardly negatively to Toshiko’s desire to be in charge of the pairs and Ingrid’s subsequent assertion that they split by gender, this is easily explained by how intent he is on maintaining a calm disposition. 

Eloise’s behaviour in this scene is equally noteworthy. She defends Desmond from accusations that he’s making people vulnerable and that she harkens to ideas of honesty and understanding Desmond’s intentions speaks to a building closeness between them. Much like Desmond, Eloise appears selective with her trust through how focus is repeatedly placed on her as ways to assign bunk-buddies is discussed, combined with how her character profile notes how she is “always ready to make her escape if anyone gets too close to her”, which I believe can be applied in both a literal-in-regards-to-fencing and figurative sense. We can discern from her Free Time Events that Eloise holds her privacy close to her and that she has certain people that she openly does not trust nor like - she doesn’t want to have a decision like who is going to be with her at her most vulnerable just chosen for her. 

Toshiko: Fear not! In all my infinite wisdom and kindness, I shall pair the rest of you! Eloise: Ah… that’s not really necessary… (...) Ingrid: Strangers’ll usually be more comfortable spending the night with the same gender. Eloise: Then… we’re splitting it by gender…? (...) Wolfgang: We won’t have Ms. Kayura’s help, but I’m sure we’ll figure something out. Let’s go. Eloise: … 

Furthermore, it does not feel at all coincidental that the scene directly after Desmond’s blackmail is revealed by Eva sees Grace pressuring Eloise to hand over her blackmail and Desmond attempting to defend Eloise before she reassures him. Eloise’s silence after Grace says that she better not have shown anyone speaks volumes - from the map during Free Time and their alibis for the time of Wolfgang’s murder alike we can explicitly see the amount of time these two have been spending around each other in the courtyard.

Grace: That fencer girl has been giving me the side-eye ever since the blackmail was announced. There’s no other explanation! Grace: Give it! Desmond: H-hey, stop that! Eloise: It’s okay…I’ve got it…

On the morning of Wolfgang’s murder, Desmond and Eloise spent all their time together in that courtyard, paralleling their positioning in the prologue. Just as then, they are each other’s alibis and they are the main one backing the other up. They proceed to stay by the other’s side literally throughout the investigation and figuratively throughout the trial. It is notable that textually Grace and Kai underscore how defensive Eloise and Desmond have been of each other throughout chapter one’s investigation and trial to accuse them of working together - ostensibly, Desmond being the murderer and Eloise his accomplice. When the two of them and Damon confront Grace during the investigation, they are largely backing each other up and adding to each other’s points while Damon chips in on his own - even going as far as to threaten Grace, knowing that she was shot at by Mara before.

Eloise: Um…for us to believe that, we need to see it ourselves… Grace: You think I’m lying? Desmond: There’s a chance you could be, unfortunately.  (...) Eloise: Also, um…couldn’t this be considered breaking the rules…? Eloise: Tozu wants this game to be fair, but… being prevented from searching every room doesn’t seem very fair… Grace: …Even if it isn’t, what are you gonna do? Eloise: … Eloise: I’ll…report it to Tozu. Grace: A-ah? Desmond: Nice idea. What do you say we look for him now? Desmond: If Tozu agrees this is sabotage, he might call Mara to help…

In the trial, when Eloise first accuses Grace, Desmond backs her. When Grace’s innocence is proven and Eloise apologises for accusing her, Desmond continues to press Grace when she shouts at Eloise by insisting she “must know something about [Wolfgang’s] last known whereabouts”. When Desmond brings up the golf clothes and equipment in Wolfgang’s room, Eloise backs him. When Mark accuses Desmond of having access to weapons like the taser gun, Eloise reacts before Desmond does. During the nonstop debate about the taser gun, Eloise brings up her and Desmond’s shared alibi as they were together the whole morning. If the player takes the Pathos Route during the trial, it is Eloise’s voicing of her doubts in voting Diana and wanting to hear her side of the story that then leads into Desmond’s own agreement to hear her out. This series of events, I think, proves a degree of trust that has built between the two that they have not extended to anyone else - even during Eva’s execution and Diana’s speech, the two are depicted together. 

The nature of Desmond’s blackmail combined with how he and Eloise are written in this chapter as consistent supporters of each other and consistently shown together leads me to be rather firm in my belief at the moment that Eloise is this “only one” his blackmail refers to. Their relationship is given as much focus as Damon and Kai and Wolfgang and Grace, which indicates the importance of it and really, really doesn’t bode well for their survival. My personal speculation at this current moment sees Eloise killing in self-defence, in which instance we will see Desmond’s ‘guard’ come to fruition. 

Sharks and swans

It can’t be a P:EG analysis without looking at the characters’ animal motifs - especially with how chapter one confirmed their relevance with the focus on Wolfgang, Eva and Diana in particular!

Desmond’s animal motif is a shark as represented by his shark’s tooth earring and this is immediately notable in tying into the dominating theme of prejudice and “judging a book by its cover” that has presented itself in contrasting ways in his and Eloise’s characters. Desmond being instinctively assumed to be dangerous and a ‘threat’ due to his position as the Ultimate Marksman directly correlates to how sharks are perceived in the media and, by extension, society. One way his shark motif is relevant lies in how it conveys this theme of being misunderstood. 

As previously noted, the first thing Wolfgang ever says to Desmond is an interrogative question about whether or not he has killed someone before, it does not take any amount of mental gymnastics for Eva and Damon to agree Desmond’s blackmail makes him dangerous, and it does not take much convincing for the majority during the trial to agree on his likelihood of murdering Wolfgang due to the taser gun originating from his room. Surely, we are instantly reminded of how sharks are similarly misunderstood as obvious killers due to how they have been negatively sensationalised by the media - leading to a general consensus in society to view them as an inherent threat. 

“Sharks have been vilified in human culture for centuries, and negative attitudes toward sharks continue to pervade mass media, perpetuating stereotypes, often conveying inaccurate information [7–11]. One way the public’s fear of sharks, which resonates deeply and viscerally, manifests itself is a pervasive overestimation of the likelihood of being ‘attacked’” (Andrew Nosal et al, 2016, The Effect of Background Music in Shark Documentaries on Viewers' Perceptions of Sharks, p.2)

Eva asserts that Desmond finding out about her having his blackmail could make her a target and, generally, the other characters are quick to assume ill intention from him. For example, him bringing up how everyone’s locks to their dorms are broken raises accusations of him exposing people and him testing people’s locks sparks similar reaction - with Wolfgang even denying him future agency by saying Desmond should go to him first. 

Desmond’s shark motif combines with how his talent is perceived to beg us as viewers to deconstruct assumptions of him being this ticking time bomb waiting to explode - to pick apart preconceived notions, examine what makes you think that way and why. It is simultaneously fascinating and frustrating to see predictions from fans about how the rest of the game will play out position Desmond as an ‘obvious’ killer due to his marksmanship and because his animal motif is an apex predator painted as a “man-eating monster” by the media, ignoring how his talent has been handled thus far and contributing to the dominating narrative about sharks that does not reflect reality. 

The majority of shark attacks on humans are results of curiosity bites on the shark’s end or mistaking humans for, say, seals. In personifying sharks and acting as if they have the same moral decision making as humans and go out of their way to maim and kill, they have become severely endangered themselves. In an article on shark conservation that analysed how sharks are portrayed in American and Australian media, it was identified that there were “four types of risks from sharks and fourteen types of risks to sharks in the articles” and that “Forty-four percent of the articles mentioned elevated public risk perceptions or fear of sharks” (Bret Muter et al, 2012, Australian and U.S. News Media Portrayal of Sharks and Their Conservation, Conservation Biology, Vol.27, No.1, p.190), which is to say that humans are more of a risk to sharks on the whole than sharks are to humans such as through overfishing, finning and habitat destruction and that this can directly parallel the ‘attacks’ on his character that Desmond has endured so far in the story.

In direct contrast in this respect, there is Eloise and her swan motif represented by her hairpin. The dominating cultural perspective on swans is that they are uniquely beautiful and elegant, they are symbols of purity and aristocracy and are a protected species in many countries including the US, UK and across the whole of the European Union. This places them at the utter opposite end of a general consensus scale to sharks and their features in popular culture reflects this from Hans Christian Andersen’s Ugly Duckling fairy tale to Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake ballet.

Swan Lake is of particular note to me due to its duality of the white and black swan that can be applied to Eloise’s characterisation. Through her white clothing, fencer-defined elegance, and timid demeanour, Eloise brings to mind Odette the white swan - or the Swan Princess - who was cursed to be a swan by day and woman by night and who is revered for her beauty and purity. Contrastingly we have Odile, who impersonates Odette while she is bound to her swan form and is the ‘black swan’ - more conniving and wicked. Traditionally, Odette and Odile are roles performed by the same ballerina and so represent this idea of duality even more. Now, Eloise is neither conniving nor wicked, but she certainly is not the ‘Odette’ that people perceive her as on a surface level, and has assertive and, really, quite aggressive talons that unsheathe when she deems necessary. 

(Eloise’s first Free Time Event, unprovoked) Eloise: If…if you ever try to do something to me… Eloise: …then…I’m going to fight back.  (...) Eloise: Once, I completely overpowered a person using just a pen… Eloise: And, uh…if you don’t believe me… Eloise: …I…can give you a taste of what that person felt. 

Additionally tied to this is the Medieval moralist view on swans as symbolic of hypocrisy. The idea stems from Hugh of Fouilloy’s Aviarium where he asserts that swans’ white plumage concealing their supposedly black flesh is reflective of a sinner who conceals their sins with a faux pious front…this line of thinking of “white = morality, black = immorality” is notoriously flawed and susceptible to challenge, and this specific idea alluding to black flesh even more obviously so. However, as a spiritual Christian belief, it is relevant when considering Project: Eden’s Garden not least because the game’s religious allusions ask us to question the very concept of Eden and how Western institutions use religious imagery - especially in how they distort it and use it for their own narrative. Every image of nature in the academy being artificial highlights this. Thus, this old idea about swans and hypocrisy may be taken into account… it is not so much direct hypocrisy that relates to Eloise, but the theme of appearance not reflecting reality and a warning to “not to be deceived by outward appearances” (Natalie Jayne Goodison, Introducing the Medieval Swan, p.12). Eloise’s character profile outright tells us to “not be deceived” (by her “size”, but this can apply generally). 

And this neatly leads into the fact that swans themselves, despite their innocent and pure iconography, are fierce - especially when it comes to defending themselves or their nests. As Aristotle puts it in his (outdated by over two millennia yet still incredibly interesting) work The History of Animals, “[swans] will repel the attack and get the better of their assailant, but they are never the first to attack” (Trans. D’Arcy Wentworth Thompson, 9.12) and Eloise explicitly references this in her fight against her own underestimation and to combat the perception of her as weak both in form and fortitude. Despite what Damon believes, I refute the idea that Eloise’s volatility makes her emotionally weak because chapter one’s trial proves otherwise as does chapter one’s investigation that instantly sees Eloise disprove Damon’s idea of her. Speaking of Damon, it is interesting how he comes to respect and almost understand Desmond who is misunderstood as a threat by others much like himself, but cannot extend the same to Eloise whom he has no axis of relatability to. 

“Still, it is significant that the administrative and agricultural experts voiced concern that aesthetic, cultural, and sentimental ideas about swans guide the birds’ protection in a strange or illogical way, and the resources expert agreed that the main—if not the only—value associated with continued protection of the whooper is sentimental value.” (Shauna Laurel Jones, 2018, Feathered majesty in the grainfield? Conflict, conservation, and the whooper swan in Iceland, p.39)

Desmond’s shark motif presenting through a shark tooth earring is not merely an aesthetic choice and instead possesses symbolic connotations. It is the choice in his design of a shark tooth earring that allows us to connect indigenous beliefs about sharks to his characterisation, as in indigenous Hawai’ian culture, shark teeth are traditionally worn as protective talismans, and certain species of sharks in indigenous Hawai’ian culture also relate to the concept of ‘aumakua’ where under certain conditions a deceased person is reincarnated as a shark and acts as a “beneficent guardian spirit” (Leighton R. Taylor, 1993, Sharks of Hawai’i: their biology and cultural significance, p.19) towards their family, both of which link to the increasingly potent theme of “guard[ing]” in Desmond’s character. 

Similarly, we find ideas of “guard[ing]” with the swan, especially the idea of being guarded. Most blatant is the fact that swans are a protected species in many particularly Western countries such as the United Kingdom, the United States, France, Denmark, Germany, and Iceland, meaning it is illegal to kill or injure them. In a literary sense, we have the Finnish national epic Kalevala wherein the hero Lemminkäinen is tasked with killing a swan that swims and sings in the Lake of Tuonela that surrounds the underworld, but instead he is killed - not textually because he has attempted to kill a swan, but the context of swans as a protected species and how they are symbolically viewed certainly influences this narrative.

However, as a point of contrast, while sharks can be associated with life in the sense of survival and their integral position in ecosystems, keeping them intact, swans are associated overwhelmingly with death. Firstly examining the former, it is notable to me that Desmond’s animal motif is one heavily concerned with conservation efforts to protect against endangerment and extinction, conditions that are in no small part due to human impact. When one sees apex predator their mind tends to swipe to violence, to these creatures being bloodthirsty, instead of taking it for what it really is: an animal that plays an indispensable role in regulating ecosystems. Already, Desmond has cemented himself as a secondary contributor in trials alongside the likes of Jean, Ulysses and Wenona, and within the group he assumes a position not the extent of leadership like Wolfgang and Jean but certainly as a prominent initiator. Sharks have lived for millions of years and their survival is integral to the smooth management of marine ecosystems, to remove them would cause a disastrous knock-on effect. In tandem, the condition of its ecosystem is integral to the survival of the shark, which raises the aspect of Desmond’s Free Time Events that has him lament the lack of open space in the academy. 

“As apex predators, sharks play an indispensable role in regulating marine populations, maintaining biodiversity, and preserving the health of our oceans (amongst many other parts they play in the tapestry of life that is below the waves). However, despite having roamed our oceans for millions of years, they currently face a myriad threats that of our own doing, including overfishing, habitat degradation, and climate change.” (Melissa Cristina Marquez, 2024, Exploring the Intersection of Indigenous Knowledge and Shark Science)

Turning to the association between swans and death is the ever-omnipresent swan song. The myth that swans are silent their whole lives until just before they die, when they sing their haunting song. Eloise can be interpreted according to this in how “silence” can be applied to her initially reserved and shy nature, with the more she develops across the story akin to the theme of transformation found in many European folktales and, unfortunately as a result, becomes closer to death her development in becoming more openly confident will be her “song”.

My personal speculation at the moment is that Eloise will become the blackened through killing in self-defence - something I find fitting for her characterisation, predicted character arc, fencing talent, and swan motif all in one - and so her swan’s song will manifest as her final plight during her trial before she is inevitably sent to death. Relatedly, the conclusion of Swan Lake sees Odette, the swan princess, and Siegried, the prince, die together. I view Desmond and Eloise’s relationship to end in one of two ways - either one of them kills/is killed and the other kills/is killed the chapter after, or one of them kills/is killed and the other survives. Either way, they cannot both live. 

The silver Swan who living had no note, When death approached unlocked her silent throat; Leaning her breast against the reedy shore, Thus sang her first and last, and sung no more: "Farewell all joys! O death come close mine eyes, More geese than swans now live, more fools than wise." (Unknown author)

And so arrives the final point to wrap this whole essay up in one neat bow: Eloise’s swan motif presents in her unwavering loyalty as a pair with Desmond. This is so unsubtle that it is underscored by Grace and Kai in the chapter one trial, sending accusations of them working together to murder their way. As has been reiterated, the two are seldom not depicted together, react to accusations towards each other with the same intensity were they to be directed at them, and defend each other with a consistency they do not afford any other character, with only Diana coming close in Eloise’s case. Like swans who mate for life, Eloise and Desmond have essentially become pair bonded. This happening so quickly is not necessarily a cause for doubt either in my opinion as that also connects to swans who bond as a pair even before they reach sexual maturity at twenty months despite living for a good two decades, and we know Eloise and Desmond’s time is far shorter than that. 

“Someone has to leave first.  This is a very old story.  There is no other version of this story.” (Richard Siken, War of the Foxes)

With everything we have of them so far, regardless of how Desmond and Eloise’s individual stories play out, they will be in one way or another entwined. 

Thank you for reading, and I would love to know your thoughts!

BIBLIOGRAPHY:

Aristotle, Thompson D. W.,The History of Animals

Goodison N. J., 2023, Introducing the Medieval Swan

Hugh, 1172, Aviarium

Jones S. L., 2018, Feathered majesty in the grainfield? Conflict, conservation, and the whooper swan in Iceland

Lönnrot E., 1835, The Kalewala

Marquez M. C., 2024, Exploring the Intersection of Indigenous Knowledge and Shark Science

Muter B. et al., 2012, Conservation Biology, Australian and U.S. News Media Portrayal of Sharks and Their Conservation, Vol. 27, No. 1

Nosal A. et al., 2016, The Effect of Background Music in Shark Documentaries on Viewers' Perceptions of Sharks

Taylor L. R., 1993, Sharks of Hawai’i: their biology and cultural significance

Tchaikovsky P. I., The Swan Lake Ballet

[sexisbetteronthemoon]

Can we have any insight into what’s going on in Lance’s head up until this point in the fic? What’s his opinion on Planet Red and Keith? (And the baby!)

thanks for the question!

ok, so, i spent most of the day thinking about how to answer this question and i'm still not quite sure? i might be overcomplicating things — i tend to do that, but it feels like a broad question since a lot has happened (it's a lot to cover lol). and i feel like i'll just be overexplaining things we already know. 😭 i'll be trying my best!

okay, this is going to be long and filled with spoilers, so if you haven't read sex is better on the moon to the current chapter (15), don't read this! putting this under a read more too.

so most of Lance's thoughts are in dialogue, actions, and subtext.

What Lance Thinks of Planet Red:

he's not jazzed about a planet that keeps trying to kill him, but it's also fear that stems from ignorance of the world around him. he complains a lot, but then there's the unicorn who brought him fruits (impressive), the kazoo bird that landed in his hair (cute, but embarrassing), and his baby girl, (the absolute best thing to ever exist!) so he understands there's both good and bad on this planet. he's also seen Keith handling animals and how it softens him, and that just makes him more appreciative.

the fact that they're dangerous animals sometimes, and Keith doesn't tend to show fear is also really reassuring to him and lessens his own!

then Keith teaches him things, and you'll notice a significant drop in his fear and complaints. and when Keith shows him the notebook, he reads the notes and realizes there's a lot more to observe about the world around him than the superficial. he starts seeing things differently. he pauses to look at creatures and plants.

and when Keith shows him the glowing flowers and moths, it's like the last nail in the coffin. he realizes Planet Red can be beautiful, and he comes to understand a little better why Keith likes it so much there.

What Lance Thinks of Keith:

at first, he's wary and unimpressed by what he sees, even a little afraid of Keith. he's just crash landed on the planet and he's scared and alone, and there's this wildman that looks more beast than man. keep in mind that Lance is the crown prince, and thus has never been treated like Keith has treated him in his life.

people always present their best faces (even if they're false or sneering) in front of Lance, and he's used to that. but then there's Keith who manhandles him and scoffs at him and throws blankets at him. he treats Lance like he is just another person who has to earn respect instead of automatically (forcefully) giving it.

and how does Keith start off? by being surly, rude, and intimidating.

Keith also calls him "princess", which leads Lance to believe that Keith knows who he is, and might even have something to do with the attack on his ship, hence the distrust in the beginning.

and then Keith keeps saving and protecting him (and despite Keith's bark, he keeps letting Lance have his way) even when Lance sometimes makes things harder for him. he's concluded that Keith is ornery and antisocial, but Lance begins to see that there's an actual person under all the hair and dirt. and he finds that Keith could really be someone he can depend on.

this leads him into revealing his name.

then Keith actually starts a tickle fight and calls him beautiful, which takes Lance off guard and makes him realize that Keith's not just the man that's helping him, but a man, with desires and wants, that thinks Lance is beautiful. suddenly, Keith isn't just "that mountain man who helps me", but "that man of flesh and blood who might genuinely find me attractive and i'm entirely alone with at all times".

at this point, Lance is well aware that Keith has an attractive body, given he's seen him naked a few times already and also been held against that muscle at night.

but finding someone attractive doesn't mean he wants to start something, and it goes for both of them. so Lance keeps his boundaries pretty clear and firm! he's very adamant in Keith not peeking at him while he changes, bathes, pops a squat etc.

at the same time, Lance is trying his best to get to know Keith, and Keith keeps resisting until he finally gives in at the swamp, where he tells Lance he's from Earth and lonely sometimes.

and when Keith gives him the comb for his hair, Lance learns Keith is thoughtful and actually listens to him when he talks.

skipping Keith's poisoning. Lance was terrified the entire time.

When Lance gets to see Keith's notebook with the various sketches of himself, he realizes Keith doesn't just find him attractive, but that he likes Lance. you don't just draw someone over and over without feeling some type of way, ya know? and Lance might be clueless about survival, but he's not socially inept like Keith is (and he learned survival from Keith, so he's not clueless about that anymore either!)

the most significant change happens after Keith takes Lance frog gigging. that night, it's the first time that Lance doesn't get on Keith's case about peeking at him. Keith is the one who brings it up and turns away, but Lance didn't actually say he should look away. before this, Lance was very quick about snapping at Keith. so... 👀 i believe this says everything.

from this point on, Lance starts flirting, flustering Keith.

it doesn't last very long, though, as this is when the pollen makes them fall asleep, there's the alleged dream of the yellow caterpillar, and Kosmo nearly dies, and then the bird woman shows up.

and now there's a point of contention between Lance and Keith, because Lance has realized Keith has a tendency to throw himself in harm's way to save Lance, while Lance wants nothing more than to watch his back and help in any way that he can.

Lance is also sticking up for himself and establishing himself as Keith's equal, such as when he tells Keith not to shove him again. he's pushing back against Keith who has so far done all the leading and decision-making. he's trying to prove that he can be a partner instead of a weight to carry.

then Keith starts putting distance between them, and Lance is hurt by that. thus far, he has been attempting to get closer to Keith, chipping away at his layers, and suddenly, Keith is saying that once Lance leaves, he'll never come back. we saw Keith be confused by Lance's sudden emotional distance and snappish attitude, and it was a direct reaction to Keith's claim that Lance "can forget about this place entirely".

and we're back to the glowing flowers and moths.

this was a very big deal. so far, Keith has proven himself to be kind of a hardass who drives them both hard for the sake of keeping Lance safe and them both ahead of The Six. but then Keith stops them at a pond for a little date (not a date, but so totally a date, we all know it). and several things become very clear to Lance

1) it's in the opposite direction of where they need to go.

2) they only have eleven days to get to Keith's cabin.

3) The Six are still around

and yet, there they are. because Keith thought Lance would enjoy it.

now, it's not a secret that Keith has certain feelings for Lance. Lance knows this! it's as obvious as the nose on his face! but Keith insinuated they would have no further contact after Lance leaves.

and so this date pretty much cements the idea that Keith is once again being socially inept and/or pulling away on purpose, and that it's up to Lance to make it clear what he wants between them. thus, the flirting picks up again, but it's like flirting with a brick wall tbh. Keith is NOT making it easy.

now, i'm sure we've all noticed Lance has a secret. seeing as we're heading toward it, i won't say much more on the subject, but HOO BOY.

What Lance Thinks of Kosmo:

perfect in every conceivable way. 1000/10. wouldn't change a thing.

What Kosmo Thinks of Everything:

Planet Red: lives here! it's perfect! plenty of food and room to play!

Lance: doesn't know how to use his nose, but still a perfect adoptive parent! beautiful! good hugs, excellent scritches! makes noises that make the tail go swoosh-woosh. always has food, love, and attention for Kosmo! 1000/10

Keith: also doesn't know how to use his nose. protective pack leader, but bad mate material. keeps ignoring pheromones potential mate is putting out. forgets to let potential mate eat first. doesn't participate in social grooming but allows attempts from potential mate. gives good scritches and always leaves best pieces of food for Kosmo. 999/10

-

anon, i hope i didn't misunderstand your ask (i haven't eaten, so i'm not firing on all cylinders orz). if i did, then that's my bad. feel free to ask for clarification 😅 or if you wanted a specific scene, you can ask for that too!

[hollowed-theory-hall]

hi hi hi!! first of all, i'm so fascinated with how your mind works. seeing your theories, metas, and explanations actually inspired me to read the books (even if they're off of this slightly dodgy website lol). i've read some of your thoughts on harry's love interests / possible li's for him (the theo posts too), and i wondered what sort of love interest would be fitting for him if they were a girl. would they be like luna or any other existing character, how would they meet (ideally), what house or personality traits, etc.

Thank you!! 💛

Holy shit, it's insane you enjoyed my writing so much even without reading the books and that I got you to read the HP books but please be careful not to download malware on your PC. Stay safe out there.

Honestly, I can see a lot of different types of characters working as a love interest for Harry, but there are some common denominators for characters I think would work with him better. That being said, shipping is very subjective, and I think any character could be written in a compelling romance with any character by a talented enough writer, so these are mostly my preferences for Harry's dynamics in a romance with how I see his character.

Someone like Luna definitely could work. I like their dynamic and under the right circumstances, I think it could work. She's blunt, and straightforward in a way Harry respects, she can call out his bullshit and isn't scared of being herself. Harry's also open-minded enough to let Luna believe whatever she wants and would probably not mind a Sweaden vacation even if he doesn't believe they'd actually find a Crumple-Horned Snorkack.

Personally, I was always under the impression that if Harry and Susan Bones actually talked they would've gotten along really well due to Susan's, like, 3 lines:

“Not with the dragon, you didn’t,” said Michael Corner at once. “That was a seriously cool bit of flying. . . .” “Yeah, well —” said Harry, feeling it would be churlish to disagree. “And nobody helped you get rid of those dementors this summer,” said Susan Bones.

(OotP, Ch16)

She clearly sees Hary's accomplishments for what they are and calls out his unfounded self-doubts (Harry needs someone who can do that without making him feel stupid).

Hogwarts students, who now found themselves the unwilling objects of a gruesome sort of reflected fame as they walked the corridors: Susan Bones, who had an uncle, aunt, and cousins who had all died at the hands of one of the ten, said miserably during Herbology that she now had a good idea what it felt like to be Harry. “And I don’t know how you stand it, it’s horrible,” she said bluntly, dumping far too much dragon manure on her tray of Screechsnap seedlings, causing them to wriggle and squeak in discomfort.

(OotP, Ch25)

She's straightforward and chill with a few of her own demons and she dislikes public attention as much as Harry. Even if Susan had ways less time with Harry, she understands he doesn't like the attention. She asks "how you stand it?" she thinks he must hate it as much as she does. I just find it interesting a random Hufflepuff girl who has 2 lines knows and understands Harry better than his love interest who thinks he likes getting attention and going after Voldemort.

Basically, a blunt, chill Hufflepuff that treats him like just Harry and not the Boy-Who-Lived would work too, is what I'm saying. Like a younger Tonks-like character who's a bit more serious and responsible (which is how I imagine Susan, except, less punk) could work with Harry. (though Harry thinks anyone who looks a little punk looks cool... He thinks Tonks is cool, and Kingsly and Bill are instantly cool in Harry's opinion for having an earring, so maybe give him a punk girlfriend. I think he'd be into it)

A Gryffindor girl who likes Quidditch (like Ginny) could've worked too. My problem with Ginny is that JKR tried to make her too perfect in the later books. Like, a Gryffindor girl who's confident and has a sense of humor could've been a good match for Harry. Just give her some actual insecurities and the willingness to be emotionally vulnerable with Harry and without Ginny's obsession so she'd see Harry as Harry and not as the Boy-Who-Lived — that could've worked. Like, Ginny as a concept could've worked if the character and her romance with Harry were written better. As she is in the books, I don't think it works though, I'd change the character's personality/attitude if I wanted to write her with Harry, so I don't feel like I could really call her "Ginny" you know?

A Ravenclaw like Cho who doesn't expect Harry to be another Cedric and is just more chill and not actively grieving could've worked. Like, as I mentioned Luna (who's a Ravenclaw) could work with Harry, but a sporty, chill, Ravenclaw could've also worked. She just needed to know who Harry is and date him for him and not as a Cedric replacement. Also, I just, don't think Harry would be interested in a girl who's into dragging him to Madam Paddifoots, but, like, a Ravenclaw who plays Quidditch and is, like, idk, obsessed with alchemy and has a bit of a mad scientist vibe going on, could work with Harry. I think his love interest should have interests of her own, basically. I think it adds flavor.

A cunning and intelligent Slytherin girl who isn't Pansy Parkinson (a la Daphne Greengrass or Tracy Davis) could work as well, depending on how you characterize her.

Basically, to ship Harry with a girl, of any house, I'd be looking for a lot of the same traits I look for in guys I ship Harry with:

Treat Harry as Harry and not as the Boy Who Lived — the reason doesn't matter but he/she has to see Harry as his own person and not his scar or fame and understand he hates the attention.

Intelligence — because Harry's actually really smart and he needs someone who could not only keep up with him but also correct and argue with him when the situation calls for it.

Self-confidence but also some insecurities — they need to have a spine to stand their ground and call Harry on his bullshit and his own low self-esteem but they should have their own issues and self-perception problems. I like it when things are fair and a ship helps each other grow together. Also, I don't think Harry would date someone truly arrogant. Arrogant to hide insecurities — that I think could work though under the right conditions.

Wit and humor — Harry is a sarcastic, sassy little shit with a slightly dark sense of humor, I think he needs a partner who can match his sense of humor and not get offended if he makes a comment about wanting to torture Snape.

Chill — Harry is a little emotionally inept, he would probably not manage well with a very emotional partner that requires a lot of attention (like Cho). Don't get me wrong, Harry would care and do his best, and pay attention when needed, but the guy doesn't really know how to deal with crying people. So, his partner should be someone who's fine with Harry's sort of comfort methods. (Some people don't want to talk about it when they're upset, they just want someone to listen to them vent a bit. Which, I think Harry would be great at. And vice versa. Harry, when upset, often just wants someone to be next to him quietly, but he doesn't want to talk about it sometimes). Basically, they need to have matching comfort styles so they could actually communicate when upset.

Chill (p2) — Harry's sort of anger requires someone who'd be able to remain cool once Harry reaches his threshold in year 5 wouldn't get quickly offended, but instead calmly put Harry in his place. Basically, they need to have more emotional intelligence than Harry because someone needs to know how to do emotions in the relationship. (In Ronmione's case, Ron is the more emotionally intelligent one, contrary to what Hermione likes to think. In Hinny's case, neither of them knows how to do emotions somehow, which adds to why they never appealed to me, I think. In Tommary, which I used to read, Harry is the emotionally intelligent one in the relationship, which is why this pairing is only realistic to me when it's a disastrous mess)

Knows to be both blunt and subtle depending on the situation — Harry needs someone to match him, as Harry can be a sneaky Slytherin sometimes, but sometimes, the situations in his life would require his partner to be brave and blunt. I think, regardless of house, his partner should be able to do both.

The capacity to be quiet — Harry is a quiet person overall and I think he'd work better with a partner who can just let him be quiet and not force him to engage in conversation. Ron and Hermione, for example, love bantering and bickering, but Harry finds their sort of bickering infuriating, so, yeah. Like, he can work with a partner who talks more than him, but they need to not always need to talk, yk?

At least a little anti-authority (or a lot) — I don't think Harry could date someone who's perfectly by-the-book and loves the rules and authority. Most of his clashes with Hermione come from a place of her trusting certain authority while Harry doesn't really trust any authority. I think he'd get frustrated dating someone who's too pro-authority (why he and Cho wouldn't have lasted even without Cedric's ghost hanging over them).

Magically talented — Harry's magic is insane, he doesn't need a partner that's on his level, but someone who is capable and skilled enough to hold their own is necessary with how dangerous Harry's life is and for him to be able to treat them seriously.

Brave — there are different kinds and levels of bravery, but at the end of the day, I don't think Harry could date someone who isn't brave enough to deal with all the shit Harry's life throws at him. Like, Harry's partner, I think, should be willing to join the trio on the Horcrux hunt should they be offered to. (I personally portray Theo, for example, as someone who doesn't think he's brave, but when he needs to, he's way braver than he thinks. Luna is brave enough to be herself and damn what anyone thinks. So you can play around with the kinds of bravery). Like, the fact Ginny didn't press him to know more about what they're planning and wanting to join the danger to help protect and defend Harry is insane to me. I think Harry deserves a ride-or-die relationship because he's a very ride-or-die person for the people he loves. (Hence why I love his friendship with Ron and Hermione. The Golden Trio is the definition of ride-or-die)

A bit of a tragic Backstory — this isn't mandatory, per se, but I think Harry would work best with a partner that has some of their own demons in their past. It's a little spice that I love. It's why I like shipping him with Theo (who from the very little we know of him can be read as being abused by his father, plus his mother is dead) or potentially Luna who saw her mother die. I think someone who's suffered some trauma similar to Harry would be better at connecting with Harry and seeing him in a way even Ron and Hermione struggle to do.

So, yeah, this is like, my thoughts on shipping Harry with any character and what's the broad strokes of my recipe for my preferred Harry dynamic in romance.

But, like with most things in fiction, it's all about execution. If you write it well enough, anything will work.

[goo34ter]

As I dive deeper and deeper into the Jaivik lore and shipping of arcane, I realize I simply cannot hold my thoughts in any longer. pt2

This contrast is what balances them so greatly, while Viktor is the voice of reason Jayce is there to provide words of the heart. In season two we can see that even in Jayces absence Viktor gets caught up in his mind and applies to much reason to the world (though im sure the Hex core/ anomaly had a part in this too) wich is what leads him to dreeming his own imperfection just that, imperfections, something to be fixed and perfected rather than something that makes him him, and helled lead him to success. When jayce goes through the anomaly and essentially goes apeshit, I think one of the reasons is because Viktors ability to apply reason and make him stop, think, and asses isn't present, leading him to be consumed by his emotions because there is no regulator. 

This immense co- dependency is mostly likely stemmed from the vast amount of time they have spent together through development of Hextech. Why do they need to exercise these weaker parts of themselves if the other is able to take them over when needed. They play into eachothers strong suits. If you've ever met someone whose able to do that math to your music , or art to your ideas you know how quickly a bond can form even if its not inherently romantic. You are able to work seamlessly because you possess abilities that work well with each other but also because you know where the other lacks and know how frustrating it can be to get your visions int fruition because of those lacks. I Have had had a bond similar in the way that is so much more familial, they are usually a one time thing never really recreatable, not only because its a product of years of development but because of an inherent awareness of the other. When I lost this relationship there was genuinely a part of me that felt missing, wich is why i understand how devastated both Viktor andJayce became in the absence of one another. There's no one to connect with, no one to share revelations or hear your though and answer your questions, to question you, to push your limits to just understand you for you.

This is where I think things get murky, because unless you've truly had a similar relationship that Viktor and Jayce have it could be hard to understand the level of care they have for one another without it being romantic at all. When you are able to form a bond like this, its a product of years of dedication, and development. A slow but steady exposure into eachothers lives. This alone is extremely intimate, which is why their relationship can be seen as both romantic and brotherly love.

Their romantic love can be seen through small acts of “devotions”, like jayce signaling to viktor he doesn't have to get up when they are facing the council, or Viktor allowing Jayce to support him with a hand on his back when walking off the bridge, even after saying people from the undercity are dangerous. These are all a lot more personal and intimate actions that stem from years spent together. Small things that don't seem like alot but to each other mean a lot more, because they understand each other and see each other. Knows what the other needs to keep moving forward because that is what they themselves want to do, move forward.

I think there may have been a point however, between victor's death and his resuscitation where Jayce began to place more importance on their relationship, deeming it something beyond that of just brothers. In the first episode (i think) of season two Jayce is literally cradling viktor’s cane like a sad victorian widow. And although I too would be devastated if i lost the only person who so passionately shared my dream i think the time jayce had simply to think about viktor and look at him, brought him to develop their relationship beyond just that of brothers. Hes using Viktors notes to brink him back to life, everything hes using is reminding him of the person hes trying to save, at what point does his desperation to save a friend become devotion? Although initially Jayce goes to Mell for his worries about viktor health he later brings himself to viktor, sleeping and spending almost all his time in the lab while viktor is comatosed, Mell has to bring herself to Jayce, because he's no longer seeking her out.

[sunflower1experiment]

SO...ONE MORE RANT CUZ I DON'T PAY ATTENTION sob

I just recently found out Jimmy didn't hurt Anya after the layoff, but way before. Which makes so much sense, and it hurts more and I'm sad I forgot, sooo I truly do not feel bad for Jimmy when I say I despise him even with how complex he is.

How did I forget/scramble it? Because as someone who saw Anya at her best in Curly's perspective you tend to miss stuff like Jimmy disrespecting Anya and her holding her stomach after worrying about her savings. I assumed it was a nervous move she does, and after the layoff he decided he really had nothing to lose. So, he just went off with the disrespect because he does to Daisuke as well with "Mommy and Daddy" phrase. But I went back and watched, yea she was really trying to stay strong for the sake of keeping the peace.

But seeing as how, easy it was for Jimmy to lash out at Curly over some bad news, because of Curly playing friend instead of Captain with Jimmy. She hides the gun, tells Curly twice about what Jimmy did and Curly's verbal support was nice but what Anya needed was more support. Emotions were high, Anya sees the best in people in their monstruous, worse moments: So she confronts Jimmy, alone...He could've hit her anything but storms out to grab the gun. Upon realizing she hid it or maybe Curly hid it, he decides to crash it to simply kill her, he doesn't think about the others. Except the fact that this whole thing could be a tragedy, Curly should have taken the hint there but was the silent, complicit bystander.

Now this is where the what ifs come in, Curly tells Anya. You should've been with me to confront him. I feel like in theory that if they both had confronted Jimmy, it would have been slightly better/different but wouldn't change their fate per say. Which is tragic when you think about it, there are so many what ifs.

Beyond the what ifs there is the "whom is at fault" In my pov, Jimmy and Pony Express are forever at fault. Pony Express acts like a typical money hungry company, Jimmy while he was mentally unstable had many chances to get his act together, but he had a self-victimization mindset. The only time he ever considers to even care for everyone else is when he can pin the blame onto Curly or someone else. The party, he exclaims that Curly wants to get away from them and tries to act like he cares. But proceeds to disrespect Anya and Daisuke.

He already has a perception of Anya and Daisuke, Anya this unaccomplished nurse who can't get into medical because she's....well let's just be real. Daisuke's fine because mommy and daddy have him covered.

He literally degrades Anya then infantilizes Daisuke and jabs at him for having help. He's simply projecting.

I know I rant about him and Pony Express a lot, but I like to discuss it. Because it gives me the chance to point out that this whole game is calling out a lot of things. "Complicite bystander", "Abusive work places", "Abusive people", "Holding someone accountable", and Taking responsibility.

Not just Jimmy, but Swansea, Pony Express, and Curly. Curly blames himself for not taking responsibility for Anya's safety because she is his priority, Swansea also blames himself for Daisuke. While he fails both him and Anya, he does try to atone. But he was still complicit during Anya's continued abuse. Jimmy never takes responsibility, just like how Pony Express will never take responsibility for practically sending them all on a practical suicide mission.

Pony Express sends them off with the remaining Cargo, fires them, they discover it's mouthwash which signifies how much everyone is worth on this ship. This includes Jimmy, their worth is now compared to a sugary bottle of alcohol....

Jimmy waters the people he abuses worths down, and when it happens to him. He's going through it mentally, but so are the others. Does he care? Not really, in a way he's the abusive aspect of Pony Express, they don't take the psych evals seriously, he doesn't either. They only show them to pretend they care, he asks Curly how he's feeling to pretend he cares then turns around and uses it against him.

Now don't get me wrong, Jimmy is smart, but not that smart. He's smart in terms of emotional manipulation but in terms of the consequences of his actions coming back to bite him. Not one bit, he knew how to spike a drink, knew how to crash the ship, knew how to manipulate Curly and make it about himself. But didn't expect everything to not work out, he expected everything and everyone to just accept and praise him.

Anya is not going to praise you for giving the pills three times, Swansea isn't going to praise you for claiming the role of Captain, and Daisuke while Jimmy believes is naive, he's not going to praise you for emotionally manipulating him and trying to twist the story about Anya and Swansea.

We all know Daisuke had a gut feeling about Jimmy but he was so focused on wanting to impress Swansea it sadly got him hurt.

Now lets rewind back to the responsibility part, Anya.

Anya was also complicit like Curly, I know it breaks my heart to even think about that but it's true. Curly is her patient, and she knows Jimmy is abusive she sees it firsthand twice and so does Curly. They parallel one another because of it, being pregnant, miscarrying most likely and seeing your abuser roam free, it does a lot.

We also gotta remember that Jimmy never sees Anya at all, the only time he ever does is when he has to give Curly pills. Which is three times, he uses that as a chance to perceive her as this clingy, crying nurse who can't do her job....even though she's been caring for Curly for 3 months straight. Then after her death he doesn't even know what to do to care for Daisuke and Curly, which is ironic because he and Swansea both talk crap about her work ethics but don't even know what to do without her.

It shows how they don't know what they're talking about and how that something/someone they believed was insignificant could make a huge difference in the situation.

All those times she didn't give Curly his meds, it was because of nausea, "The baby", second time is she was telling Swansea about Jimmy, she's grieving, and Swansea told her his plan. Third time it's because she's uncomfortable because Curly cannot consent to it, and Jimmy goes off, do these justify the abuse of her patient and her complicity, no not at all. But it just shows how much of a struggle she's going through and let's not forget that her baby bump was probably getting bigger, but Jimmy ignores it because he believes it's not his fault but instead hers.

It's so tragic how everyone lost their lives, simply because the company didn't care to tend to their safety and because Jimmy wouldn't take responsibility.

Sorry if this is confusing, jumbled and makes everything sad. There is a lot to analyze.

One thing we can all agree on is, Capitalism, work abuse, and Company greed was a huge part of the problem. It sounds small and a small detail in the game but also a huge problem. Pony Express is lazy and cheap- Anya, Pony Express bankrupt and laying everyone off illegally.

Pony Express not having safety locks for the sleeping rooms except the medical room and cockpit- Anya

Pony Express not doing background checks - Jimmy

Pony Express having psych evals but not pressing the importance of it because they do not care about their workers. And said workers not taking it seriously thus leading to the nurse being harassed.

[bomberqueen17]

how it's going

I am delighted so far by the responses to the post about signing up to beta/cheer-read the solarpunk tallship bisexuals novel I've decided to really give a go this year-- if you missed it, this is the post-- I have gone through and added everyone who signed up so far and it's a lovely mix of names I know and names I don't, not so many people it'd be hard to keep track and not so few that I'm worried about burning somebody out or totally winding up relying on one poor reader to keep my sanity going. I am also always pumped to get a lurker to de-lurk and say hi, not that there's anything wrong with lurking, I've got a few spaces where I lurk because that's what I need from that space. But it's always nice to be able to like, relate to somebody, y'know?

Not that you can really talk a lot in a google doc. I admit a lot of what's kept me going on Witcher has been having various little Discord threads where I can paste in whatever line I'm smug about, or that I'm stuck on for workshopping, and having a conversation about it, and not having that (I have a thread going in a Witcher discord but since it's off-topic it's kind of... well, low-traffic). I don't know if it's feasible to make a new Discord so I probably won't. But.

Anyway I will at some point turn that form off, but it seems to have worked pretty well so far as a method for adding people specifically to the doc, and I will leave it open and keep checking it for a little longer if any of y'all reading this were on the fence about signing up. I just can't rattle around alone in that doc and still keep my momentum. I'm only up to chapter three or so and the main plot hasn't even started but there's thusfar been at least one really confusing action sequence and I've realized that I've got a serious case of zero visual information being conveyed, so that's been helpful. Even with only a couple of readers-- ha, even the last couple of hours before I started adding people to the doc it had already done a lot of its job because I started proofreading with an audience in mind, which in my case tends to improve readability, which is what I want.

Listen, there's a noble purpose in telling stories for their own sake to yourself, but the idea of telling a story so that others can understand it is important to and I value it highly. So. That's what this is about.

So I've got a few people poking around in there with me and I feel much better about life and have some hopes I might make it over the hump into a real plot now, LOL.

But I think I'm gonna snippet post, which I haven't much with this work yet! (Have I? I forget. I started it in the fugue state of pre-holiday fuckery last year so who knows.)

bah i can't find a good snippet. well, here's a recently-composed one anyway.

As they approached the ship, Tom said, “You’ll tell the others, yeah? Simmons didn’t know. It ain’t his fault.” “I don’t know as it’ll help,” Keller said. “They’re mighty displeased about how you been treated. It reflects on them, y’know?” “It’s not so bad,” Tom said. “I’d rather be here than escorting the Barka convoy back to Subia in Jeanette all by my lonesome knowing damn well Righteous is waiting there for me with a bone in her teeth. No thank you, I’d rather not be set up on a suicide run like that. And you know if I got killed in a fourteen-gun sloop facing down a bloody-minded forty-gun privateer they’d tut-tut and say a proper Subian gentleman could’ve won.” “Oh sir,” Keller said. “You know they’d say that,” Tom said. “You know they would. No thank you, I will take my lumps and stick with Haines and I’ll thank you not to force me to defend poor Simmons the entire time. It weren’t none of his doing, Henry Keller, but that don’t mean I want to have to argue with the rest of you lot about him every blessed day of this commission.” “He’s also an ignorant sod,” Keller pointed out. “It don’t signify,” Tom said. “You know me and Yardley won’t let no harm come to the ship.” “Oh, Yardley,” Keller said. “I forgot he’s aboard. He’s been scarce.” Tom rolled his eyes. “He’s taking it well, too,” he said. He rummaged through the few parcels he’d brought back, and pulled out a bag and handed it over to Keller. “Share that out with your mess-mates,” he said. “And tell them-- it ain’t his fault, at all.” Keller took the bag with pleasure-- it was candy, Tom knew they’d have liked liquor better but he didn’t dare risk them being found with it and punished, with Simmons and not him in charge, so candy was safer. Keller looked back up at Tom, weatherbeaten face crinkled with a grin, and said, with a wry, grudging concession, “I’ll tell them.”

[theweeklydiscourse]

tw: mention of CSA and abuse

just saw your recent reblog about Nosferatu and idk what is your actual take on it but i've to disagree with the op saying <this is not a story about grooming nor abuse... it can be,> the movie is very obviously and directly concerned about sexual abuse and the uncomfortable eroticism only enhances the horror of the whole situation. i just find posts that constantly need to mention "it's not about abuse it really isn't!" entirely dishonest and intentionally denying the very obvious theme of the movie just so they don't have to face the fact that they liked a ship that is as noncon as it gets. it is essentially a grooming rapist/victim relationship which obviously makes people uncomfortable to admit which is why they don't want to acknowledge that. and that explains the vehement push back against the SA narrative (which isn't a simple interpretation but very much what literally happens in the movie). i just think that people need to just start being honest with themselves like there's nothing wrong if you end up liking an absolutely fucked up dynamic and the whole “death and the maiden” of it all but please stop with the "this isn't a story of abuse" takes because that is actually harmful. not the shipping but denying the fact that this is a movie about abuse because it has led to some very horrible takes of rape apologism with people saying "it's not abuse because she called to him so it can't be" like... no. just no.

There are a few issues at play in the current discourses surrounding Nosferatu. First, one side makes sweeping generalizations about what the film is definitively about, and then the other side counters it with its own sweeping statements. This predictably gives way to certain over-corrections in the discourse that try to find an absolute answer to subject matter that is up for audience interpretation. I actually had a similar thought occur to me when I read that quote in that particular post, and I say that as someone who is really into the "Death and the Maiden" dynamic. We're talking about a film that provides more than enough support for multiple interpretations and it's frustrating that people reject other people's ideas so they can have the *one ultimate correct* take on it.

This issue is exacerbated by the current internet climate of moralizing textual interpretations and the lack of understanding surrounding the genre Nosferatu belongs to. Gothic fiction often features taboo subject matter that is considered by many to be off-putting and disturbing, and usually, that leads to the judgement of those who enjoy it. The reason that people are overcorrecting by saying that it's not about abuse is responding to the denial of the existence of themes of repression, desire and love in the film. It's a phenomenon I also find irritating. Viewers who are totally unfamiliar with the kinds of themes and subject matter gothic fiction deals with seem to be imposing only one possible interpretation of the text while acting like people are immoral for thinking otherwise.

I also consider Robert Eggers's words in my own reading of the film. In an interview, Eggers noted that his approach to the film was informed by the trope of the "demon lover" and even referred to the relationship between Ellen, Orlok, and Thomas as a love triangle. The film is explicitly erotically charged in a manner that can be taken either way, and I believe that both interpretations are valid ones. Outright denial of interpretations of Ellen and Orlok's relationship as abusive seems foolish to me. But I also get why people might be uncomfortable fully acknowledging the more twisted nature of their dynamic. Nobody wants to get labelled as an abuse apologist over fictional matters or shipping, and there are times when merely engaging with darker subject matter gets people labelled as such. However, people need to stop being so absolutist about these things and learn to substantively engage with differing viewpoints.

I think that the online tendency to moralize fictional preferences plays a large role in people's resistance to being honest with themselves about liking taboo subjects or twisted dynamics. There's nothing wrong with liking it, but it's hard to do so openly without incurring some form of criticism and contempt. Denial gets us nowhere.

[himluv]

It's morning, and I'm still in bed, having pre-coffee thinky thoughts. Mainly about Veilguard lol.

I'm thinking about why I haven't talked about Solavellan in datv much yet. This blog has become an almost exclusively Lucanis Dellamorte blog these past few months 😂. But, I've been obsessed with Solavellan for 10 years. They are my otp. Soooo what's going on?

Under the cut because length and SPOILERS.

1. I genuinely haven't fully processed the Solavellan ending yet. I've done it twice and I sobbed both times and it hurts SO GOOD. But I still feel like I haven't let it get all the way in yet. I'm keeping it at arm's length just a little bit because... Ow.

2. I'm mad at Solas. We see him at his worst in datv. It's been a decade of solitude and desperation and he is wearing that Fen'Harel mask non-stop. He's lost sight of himself (if he ever had a good grip on the concept in modern times). And... I didn't really understand just how much I loved Varric until this game. Because, now I can't see fanart of him without tearing up. I can't play datv without crying over him. And while that also hurts SO GOOD (and I love tragedies), I also cannot forgive Solas for killing Varric and then LYING about it and USING Varric's memory against Rook. Like... I have a lot to unpack there but it feels unforgivable to me.

3. But, how I feel and how Riallan Lavellan feels are two different things. She loves him still, after everything. Not to say they won't have some very big serious talks in the Fade and that she isn't mad at him, but she ultimately does forgive him. And, so there's a gap between me and Ria at the moment that's going to take time for me to process before I can start writing them again (I very much want to write them again).

4. I love my Rook, Embria Aldwir. Like, so so much. And I LOVE Riallan, but she's much more removed from me and my personality than Embria is. When I play DA games for the very first time I usually play as/for myself, then make a second character to RP and actually establish my canon. But... in datv, Embria hit all the right boxes and notes. My first run felt like canon and I have latched onto this girly harder than ANY of my previous DA ocs. I can't wait to explore in fic how Embria and Riallan's paths cross and what their relationship becomes, but I'm not there yet. I'm still cooking.

4. My biggest reason for not yapping more about Solavellan is that... The fandom around Solas has become incredibly toxic and almost... Invasive. Like, I love him and love seeing gorgeous art of him and Lavellan, but also... The takes are frequently bad and the body swap mods are getting egregious (like c'mon, he would not do that and you know it). I know this is a personal squick, but for me, anything that feels that disingenuous to the character is a complete turn off. Seeing him do things he would. not. do. makes me wonder if people even actually like him? Or just some weird version they've cooked up in their mind these past 10 years. Idk, I'm just seeing a lot of stuff in Solavellan spaces that is actually making me like Solas less, because of how fans treat him AND other fans. Which... Sucks. So, I'm trying to preserve MY Solavellan, my beloved, tender, tragic otp, and to do that I can't really participate in fandom about them. At least, not right now when everything is fresh and feverish.

So, yeah. That's where my head is at re: Solavellan. I love them. I just have a lot of complicated feelings about them right now. So I'm gonna keep playing and learning with Lucanis and Embria. Don't be surprised if I come out of nowhere with a giant fic involving all of them in like, five years (I didn't start writing Solavellan until 2019, even though I shipped them right after DAI released).

And, if you made it this far and also enjoy tender, tragic Solavellan, I have a fic to give you:

Inevitable

It's complete, and follows Riallan and Solas from the very beginning, to just after Trespasser. Canon-compliant, in-between moments with eventual smut.

It is the fic of my heart. I spent the better part of four years writing it and sobbed when it was done. Please read it if it sounds like your jam.

And of course, it comes with a playlist. Enjoy!

[nothingenoughao3]

I will say this forever as long as there is breath in my body, and couching my observations with love for Titan AE overall:

This movie's first two acts feel like Draft 3, but the final act feels like Draft 1.

There is a stark difference in quality and characterization. This is true across the board, although the biggest sins were committed against Korso. Here, let me count the ways:

Cale's arc from a cynical dope to a hero feels like it's missing a vital beat to tie it all together. I understand that Bluth and Goldman were experimenting with "less is more" storytelling, and overall I respect the approach, but this one comes off as an omission of editing and not a deliberate storytelling choice. They did remove a bit where Cale visits a human drifter colony for the first time. That is, I think, where his turnabout was supposed to happen. The "my brother has a photograph of Earth" scene is a poor substitute for him being surrounded for the first time by other people he's previously dismissed as scum. Those people welcoming him in would make him feel shame for his prior behavior. Unlike the bit where he tries to skip the human line and flat-out deny his own humanity, he embraces it. There's your impetus for him to transform into a full hero... an impetus that isn't really there in the finished film.

Gune feels stupider in Act 3, and does things we never imagined him doing based on the first half, such as piloting the entire fucking ship AND operating weapons (two separate systems that required two operators before) while screaming "WHO'S YOU'RE DADDY". it's korso btw

Stith has more lines in Act 3. She spends most of the movie growling, grunting, and being borderline nonverbal compared to Preed's snark--then she starts snarking along with everybody else. I don't mind this change, but it is a change, an inconsistency which points to a major change having been made in earlier parts of the film unreflected in the later parts. (I assume Joss Whedon was responsible for this.)

Akima's job in Acts 1/2 is different than in Act 3. Assume for the sake of argument that the inconsistencies are not "because her job is to be the girl" and are from the same issue as the rest of this list. Akima starts out hanging around the pilot's area of the Valkyrie, but only while Korso's not there--which is consistent throughout Acts 1/2. She CAN pilot but it's not her job; I'd say her job is probably supposed to be a medical officer (which is why Korso leaves Gune and Preed to watch the ship, why would you NOT leave your best pilot to keep the engines warm, and also why she recognizes the Gaoul when nobody else does--because girls have empathy she's into biology). All of the above goes away in Act 3, where they lean super-hard on her being the pilot to end all pilots and forget that she's supposed to be a medical officer. This all points to Akima's job having changed at least twice during the script editing process, and said process was arrested before they really settled on her purpose. Also she's a girl who serves any purpose so long as she has purple hair and flirts with the MC.

Hey remember how Gune built this device with a button on it that he didn't know the purpose of in his very first scene? Remember how he tries to run an analysis of this device in his next big scene? I do and you probably do, BUT THE MOVIE JUST FORGOT ABOUT IT. We had a Setup scene, a Reminder scene, and no goddamned Payoff scene. It should have come up when Gune was blasting at Drej ships! He should have hit the button and launched it into space and taken out a bunch of Drej! Or hey, what about it being used in an attempt to kickstart the Titan, only it doesn't work and they have to engineer the Drej Energy idea by the seat of their pants? But it never comes up again, because they didn't finish editing the script and forgot about including the Payoff!

And now Korso. Oh Korso. Look how they massacred my boy.

There is the shape of something great here. Korso being a nihilist pretending to be an optimist has great dramatic potential! Him melting down because he realizes that Cale's taking all this rah-rah New Earth bullshit seriously could be great. There are even other tacks they could have taken up where this could still conceivably make sense.

What if Korso thought he could manipulate Cale into going along with the mission, then appear to agree with what Cale's been saying this whole time just as Cale changes his own mind? Imagine that conversation! Korso quietly saying that Cale's right and there's no hope and maybe they should just give up, Cale having to fight against his boyfriend mentor and his own words being thrown back in his face. Great fucking cinematic potential.

Or, or! Korso thinks he's saving humans from the Drej by destroying the Titan. What if he sincerely believes the best way of helping humans is disarming them so the Drej have no reason to kill anyone else? That would be in line with the caring, heroic man we met in Act 1 and saw throughout Act 2. And it's always more interesting to have an antagonist who thinks they're virtuous or heroic.

What if Korso doesn't view his betrayal as a betrayal? What if Cale and Korso are fighting over who is the proper Savior of Humanity and how humanity should be saved?

Great shit. Dramatic. Delicious fodder for ficcing. And tragically not what happened. Instead Act 3 kicks in and suddenly Korso only cares about money and grabbing what he can. Okay. Who do I sue for whiplash.

There's still a decent story to tease out of this--his "World blowin' up changes a man" line highlights that it's not so much money motivating him as trauma. This feels like the direction Act 3 leans into by the end. Korso telling Cale that it's fine if Cale kills him, Korso running to rescue Cale when he really didn't have to, Korso sacrificing himself (whether you think he's dead or not)… these are the actions of a reckless man who does not care about his own life. A traumatized man still haunted by the Earth being destroyed, feeling responsible for said destruction in ways he can never actually make up for, okay, also delicious, good stuff, but.

But that's Korso on the Titan, who feels very different from Traitor!Korso on the Valkyrie. Traitor!Korso punching Gune, threatening the the crew, talking casually about murdering Stith, fistfighting Cale, abandoning Cale and Akima at New Bangkok, being so determined to murder Cale and Akima that he risks everyone's necks and his own ship in the Ice Rings… this feels like a guy who is in fact just motivated by grabbing whatever he can and fuck everyone else.

We can and should apply whatever Watsonian explanations we can devise for Korso's inconsistency here. But the reality, I think, a Doylian one: Korso's inconsistent because his character arc was supposed to have a major editing-related alteration, riiiiiiiight around the point when they stopped editing the script and had to put it into production.

I'm probably totally off-base with this claim but it sure does feel like it's true.

Brought to you, exclusively, from me and my “still-bitter-about-the-shitty-writing-for-Korso-in-the-second-half” ass!

[crookedfivefingers]

3.13 | ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟᴏʀᴅꜱ

link to the post I accidentally wound up prattling endlessly about in the tags 💀

[dimension-20-every-introduction]

Everyone Introduced in Dimension 20's Fantasy High: Junior Year episode 17

[trashcreatyre]

I think the main thing that pisses me off about like 90% of mephiles ships is that people will be like "how old is he??" Look that fanwiki says that he's ten and they RUN with it. Like they don't read further. I'm so convinced that most people don't even know the plot of 06 bc the shit I've seen people draw and write with the characters is just mind boggling.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Still wild to me that the Avatar team saw a guy write a love story between a stick and a monkey and were like "This is the guy who we need to write Rangshi and Yangvik" and then he ended up making two of the best couples in all of the Avatar-verse TT0TT

[cranberrymoons]

.

[mothbeasts]

i miss posting and making and engaging with ieytd content but I will be honest sometimes it feels alienating. as a lesbian.

[memento-morri-writes]

I've been thinking a lot about how Rook's reunion with his former mentor, Zara, is going to go, and since I can't predict what the DM is going to have her do or say, I can only dwell on what I know is going to happen. Which happens to include taking off the illusion ring that's been hiding his injuries from her. So have a snippet of the description I have planned for that moment:

tw for description of (mostly healed) injuries

He hesitates, twisting a ring on his finger. Looking at it more closely, she can tell it’s very finely crafted, and must have been very expensive. A large emerald is set into the band. Rook sighs, and pulls the ring off his finger in one quick motion.  Immediately she’s struck by the difference in his appearance as the illusion melts away. He looks awful. His warm, healthy skin fades to a dull and sickly grey. There’s huge bags under his deeply sunken eyes, and his cheeks are hollowed, as though they have been carved out by an overeager sculptor. He looks like he’s recently risen from the grave.  While he was thin before, now she can see his ribs under the skin, and his collarbones are exaggeratedly pronounce. Thin white lines left by dozens upon dozens of recently healed cuts are scattered across his body. On top of that, faded bruises cover most of his visible skin, a mottled mosaic of purple and yellow. They’re clearly days, maybe weeks old, and she can only begin to imagine what they must have looked like when fresh. Bandages are barely visible under his shirt, wrapping around his back, hinting at even more injuries.