#which makes actually writing them really difficult
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Hello. First I’d like to say that I love Pizza Game so much. Second, sorry if you’re the wrong person to ask about this and/or you’ve already been asked about this, but what advice would you give to someone who wants to make a visual novel but has like zero idea about where to start, if you don’t mind me asking? I had an idea for a visual novel recently that I really like, but I admittedly have like none of the skills I would assume are requisite to creating a good visual novel aside from writing. Or any real knowledge of what the process for crafting a good visual novel would be.
Yes, I am aware that I am a fool. No, I will not give up on this endeavor.
Also, one aspect in particular that I’d like to ask you for advice about, since it’s a bit similar to a mechanic in Pizza Game that I feel like I haven’t seen a lot of other visual novels use (unless this is a thing that shows up in a lot of visual novels and I don’t know because of the few visual novels I’ve experienced Pizza Game is the only one I actually know about that does it) except actually diegetic instead of just a quality of life feature, is how to make the dialogue roll back like it does in Pizza Game. The main character of the story idea I want to make has the ability to do that as an actual superpower, so however I end up making this visual novel, it’d have to include something like that as a feature. And I’d need to make the game able to acknowledge the fact that you’ve used it and probably also give the player an action prompt for “something interesting will happen if you rewind here,” which I feel like is going to be a pain and a half to accomplish in a way that looks good, so any advice you can give me would be appreciated, though I understand if the second part is too complex for you to just puzzle out how to do for a rando asking for your advice on Tumblr. Admittedly I could probably make the main character’s power… basically anything else, really, since the main point is that they have a superpower and not that it’s specifically time powers, but with the way I’m setting up the story and challenge of the game, the character having a time-rewinding power pretty solidly sets them up as the person who has to do everything without it seeming too… “I know the answer to this problem, but figure it out and tell everyone for me, Naegi.” So I’m kinda attached to that idea, even if it causes me a great deal of annoyance to figure out.
Thanks in advance if you have any advice to give me. And again, thank you for making Pizza Game, truly the best visual novel of all time.
Hi (sorry for late response),
My advice for "how to make visual novel" starts and ends with Ren'Py! It's free, open source, and easy to use for people who just want to write! Nearly every Western indie visual novel uses it, and for good reason.
As for your question... The good news is that rollback is actually a built-in feature of Ren'Py. You probably didn't suspect as much, because it's kind of an unusual behavior to include in games by default and can "cheapen" the seriousness of VN-style branching narratives. (It's hard to make choices matter if you can just undo them 10 seconds later.) Doki-Doki Literature Club and Slay the Princess (I think?), arguably the two most famous Ren'Py games, both disabled it for this reason.
The bad news is that having the game acknowledge use of rollback is kind of difficult. Pizza Game does it twice iirc, but only as quick early gags, because it requires cluttering your script with persistent variables. If your game uses this as a central mechanic, your code will be hard to read, write, and test... I do not recommend it.
If you still want to give your character a visual-novel ludo-narrative superpower, there a certainly other options:
Use the tried-and-true "wow you've completed this scene before? here's different text!"
Have dialog that only shows up in the text history window (I've seen at least one game do this and it was pretty neat)
"Stop" time using audio/visual effects and let your character investigate the scene/people's thoughts or something
Make the game create/detect files in the game folder (a DDLC staple, ofc, though I've seen other meta Ren'Py games fool around with this)
...Or peruse the Ren'Py documentation and see what you can come up with.
Ganbatte, Anon-chan! (•̀ω•́)૭✧
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
Checking in - Author Updates - Quick Poll
Hello all! I hope you are all doing well!
I wanted to check-in. I don't have a ton to say on development, just wanted to keep you in the loop on where I am at personally since it tends to affect production speed. I also have a question for you at the bottom.
As I've posted about before, this year has brought about some challenges for me. There aren't a ton of good developments on that front, and my job is being...difficult. The (technical) good news is that I am still employed, but some days I wish I weren't. (I'd much rather be writing IFs, lol.) There is still uncertainty about the future of my job because it is at the mercy of the whims of my government. But what is more pressing currently is that my employer has opted to treat its employees worse (let me tell you, this is a feat because they've never really treated us well), by making our lives and jobs harder. I've made some "worst-case scenario" plans to prepare, so I'm just getting by one day at a time. Oh...and I also have needed to work overtime again, so that's another time suck there. Ugh. In May, I'm taking a couple days of off for me to rest.
In more recent news, I am doing physical therapy...yippy! In recent months I have struggled with my right shoulder. I assumed it was one of those "you're in your late 30s" pains, and I just dealt with it. Don't do that, by the way. I have a very bad habit of just doing with little regard for pain and discomfort. But, it got difficult to hug without pain, and nothing messes with my huggin'. We really don't know what is wrong with my shoulder/arm, but I'm doing virtual (oooh shiny) PT (not the Silent Hill variety) to hopefully correct the issue. If I don't see results, I will need expensive tests and scans. No worries currently, though, I don't think this will slow me down much at all. I can still write and I don't experience any discomfort when I do.
I'm also still working on a coding class, which is self-paced, but I'm sticking to a lesson schedule to make sure I get it done. I would really love to be able to make improvements of my own to GC or even make my own Twine Template someday.
So, in more fun development news, Chapter 6 is growing steadily. And so is Chapter 5, technically. If you missed it, check out this Tumblr ask where I talk a bit about that. The ask and answer contain some slight spoilers for Ch 5 & 6, but nothing too specific.
Chapter 5 is up by a bit over 1500 words, if you're curious, and Chapter 6 is up to over 69k words. I am wrapping up a big moment for Zahn, which might be a bit heavy. After that, there's a more fun moment, which will present a few coding challenges for me, but I'm looking forward to it. *rubs hands together like housefly*
Finally, I have a question for subscribers or those who may want to sub in the future. I find myself wondering what else to post about at times. Especially when I have inordinately busy weeks, I just can't think of things that you may want to see other than peeks at the chapter. I sincerely wish I had more time to add more projects. I have so many ideas kicking around in my head...
So, I was wondering if you were interested in seeing things other than God-Cursed that I have worked on. These would be things that may or may not become much of anything later, so I wasn't sure if there would be much pull to see them (or if it would just be a cruel tease, lol). I have an incomplete IF that I did to help me learn Twine a couple of years ago. I used it to just get acquainted because I am very much a hands-on learner. It's a humorous and simple story (loosely) based on an actual time in my personal life. I have debated about finishing it. I have a couple of others as well where I was playing with a story idea to see how it felt. I also have a complete romance novel which I am slowly editing for publication.
Patreon, Ko-fi links if you want them.
So that's all for me. If anything big happens, I will let you know! ^_^
Take care, everyone!
~Lunan
51 notes
·
View notes
Text
wait okay I haven't seen anyone talk about this yet (and I'm really sorry if this has been brought up before, to my knowledge it hasn't, but obviously I haven't seen every single post ever), during "perfect revenge" when they first go into the dead fish layer thing whatever, and around the time where uliana says "find that perfect, perfect revenge"
HADES LITERALLY GRABS ONTO MORGIE'S SHOULDERS AND DOES A LIL JUMP?? AND HE'S SMILING AND HE SEEMS SO HAPPY HE JUST DOES A JUMP LIKE
it's soo cute 😭 honestly in my opinion it feels super out of character for him, idk why it was even included but like maybe it shows a part of hades that's super bubbly, which he tries to mask with his apathetic, uninterested demeanor?
but the way he jumped on morgie's shoulders in particular, makes me wonder more about their dynamic? like is it because morgie's so bubbly that hades is like that around him too? and the way that morgie was quick to agree to hades's "yeah let's burn her to a crisp" makes me wish we got to see more of them. like imagine hades always acting so tough and unconcerned around maleficent, but finally letting loose and being super excited and happy when he hangs out with morgie.
anyways just a thought, I figured it would be nice to point it out and see what you guys think about it. that's all for now! :))
(also now I can't get the idea out of my head where hades is being all chill to maleficent like "yo imma go hang out with morgie" and she's like "okay whatever" and then cut to hades hanging out with morgie where they're both squealing and jumping up and down like a pair of teenage girls while one of them spills the tea 😭 I'm sorry I can't this is too funny 💀 I actually need a fic about this like this is some top-notch villain behavior fr)
#I was trying to watch hades's scenes to figure out how to write for his character#and I stumbled upon this gem#but now I'm even more confused about his personality#I honestly don't know how he should act#bro's super hard to figure out frfr#the hardest thing is trying to write for characters that you barely get any content for#because then it's like I don't know them well enough to be able to decide what they'd do in a scenario#which makes actually writing them really difficult#plus I'm always stressing that my writing is super ooc for whoever I'm writing for so that's not very fun#lilac’s rants#descendants#descendants the rise of red#descendants 4#d:tror#the rise of red#rise of red#hades#hades descendants#descendants hades#young hades#descendants young hades#morgie#morgie le fay#descendants morgie#descendants morgie le fay#perfect revenge#descendants perfect revenge#teen hades#d:tror vk#uliana's crew
129 notes
·
View notes
Text

lil columbo sticker design i made for my etsy :) i'm not sure what the market is for columbo merch but if the demand is high enough i'd like to make an enamel pin in the future!
#columbo#lt columbo#sticker#art#illustration#peter falk#1970s#retro#if you'd like a pin please consider picking up a sticker! pins are a huge investment with a large minimum order quantity so#i can't just make them on a whim yknow. but also i reeeaaallly really want a tiny columbo for my hat lol#i think i struck a good balance between 'making him small enough proportion-wise for a sticker' and 'not really making him look#chibi or anything'. which is difficult dhjbdbjhsf#hes a little guy but he also has lil guy energy. so it just Works#i want to draw more of that crossover but i should be saving my comic/writing energy for my actual comic but also i have a shop to run and#other responsibilities and actually i need to be able to clone myself
589 notes
·
View notes
Text

BEACH OUTFIT 💥💥💥💥
He used to surf the web back in 98'.
#the clothes were so difficult for no reason i kept having to edit them#i actually really like this one lol#cunty uncle type thing going on#Also i love the HC that he as a plush tummy thats so cute and im stealing it#i was about to give him flipflops until i realized he cant do that#He had a dolphin print shirt but it looked ugly with the shorts and i really wanted the striped shorts lol#deltarune spamton#spamton#spamton g spamton#spamton fanart#deltarune#deltarune chapter 2#i think it looks fine but still i hope it comes across he's resting his right arm on an invisible prop for the pose lol#there was a small little fella in the back of my mind who wanted to put him in a two piece but i couldnt sorry lmfao#edit: I forgot to write this out but I wanted to put it on any post bc i dont want to post a txt post just for this#but honestly he's gotta be some flavor of queer.#It doesnt matter to me which type all that much but I HC that even though he probably is#he has never been in a relationship and i dont think he ever will#he is so full of himself and he's kind of an ass tbh. That and i doubt he trusts anyone with what he's gone through#even if he got time to heal i dont think he'd ever trust someone enough to make a real relationship that way#Thats it thanks for coming to my ted talk#if you opened the tags here's your secret paragraph & im not sorry#BuwheArt
318 notes
·
View notes
Text
seeing disability awareness posts end with “TLDR; no, read it” is fucking WILD
#queerpd.txt#it was about schizophrenia as well#and erm…#👋 has hallucinations that make my digital screens morph and change which makes them hard to read at time#especially big blocks of text… sooo?#schizophrenia#actually delusional#hallucinations#disability#disabled#abliesm#but like yeah there are a lot of disabilities that can make it difficult or even impossible to read large amounts of text#and so tldrs can be REALLY helpful for those people who still want to get the important information in something#bc just cause we struggle to read doesn’t mean we don’t deserve education and information#so it’s just wild to me. to act like someone’s evil. for wanting to check a tldr#like you can just not include it if you really don’t want to write it. you don’t have to also be an asshole#+ it’s helpful for those of us who struggle to process every detail in things#a lot of the time i will read a whole post AND the tldr bc it helps me understand exactly what is being discussed better
134 notes
·
View notes
Text
....idk in a fandom this gigantic how are people already coalescing onto a handful of popular headcanons and scenarios that just become the baseline now, when the source material gives us literally limitless possibilities to work with
#the torrential flood of 'jayvik with 4 kids' content im getting on arcane twt is incredible rn#but i do feel like im sitting in a bit of a corner bc i feel like the only person at this point who doesn't hc viktor as trans sobs#there's obv absolutely nothing i have against it it's just become a surprisingly pervasive fanon view that it's actually difficult to avoid#i think at least half of fics in the jayvik tag are trans viktor lmao#not to say i don't read any that are. but it's just not really what im interested in#i fear it will become one of those fanon hcs that will just be accepted as fact and if you happen to not ascribe to it you'll be ostracized#i've even started to see 'don't mpreg this you better be talking about trans pregnancy' like hi. sorry but are you new here#half my interest in the ship esp postcanon stuff is the weird magic and monsterfuckeryness of it all#like how can you not explore interesting other ways of giving them kids. he's connected to the arcane. he might still be in herald form#who the fuck knows. if i see pregnant viktor i would honestly prefer it to be Weird and semi-nonhuman thats the cool shit#i just. idk. srs please im not trying to say anything bad about the trans viktor headcanon it's fine and im glad ppl see themselves in him#it's just. it is becoming rather inescapable. the 'castiel loves bees' effect yknow.#i really want to interact with this fandom and im trying to like. reply to people on twitter. and even more now it feels like#if my headcanons don't align to the popular fandom big names' then it's pointless. i have no 1-on-1 communication with anyone#in this fandom it feels very lonely. i watch everyone make great art and jabber on and i kinda just watch and wave from the corner#anyway i'll just keep imagining my weird arcane herald mpreg or w/e. it's fun. prob will never write it tho cause the fandom clearly#knows what it wants and that isn't it lol. i barely see any arcane herald fics which is WILD. like canon gave you a feast and you're#ignoring it in favor of just having viktor be human in everything. lowkey hydrogen bomb vs crying baby lmao#i can think of three postcanon fics that have arcane herald viktor and i hold onto them so tightly lol#but yeah. this goes for more than just trans viktor it's about 'all timelines all possibilities' in terms of what people write in fics#it's for the most part very...tame? in terms of creativity of concept? there's darkfic of course but.#not nearly enough in the way of Weird that i'd expect given what's actually offered in the source material#'go write it yourself' well im trying it's taking forever and also the fandom's made me hesitant to write anything weird bc it seems like#there isn't interest in it. like bro even the number of fics featuring mage viktor is insanely low#the number of viktor permutations we have to work with and the fandom opts for the easy ones almost every time. sad
9 notes
·
View notes
Note
Thanks for opening my eyes to Miravi as a ship, it’s one I never would’ve even thought of but once I started thinking about it… yeah. Yeah!!!! It makes so much sense! Two tropey girls, a tragic princess and her conflicted knight in shining armour! I can’t help it, I’m a sucker for that…. (this might be why I always play as Vicky in MP…. because when I romance Miri my queen…. the polaroid is them as a knight and a princess….)
I love how you characterise them a bunch. I love that they can be two dorks together. Two nerds who love talking to and listening to each other. Two people who can heal together. Happy times for the both of them <33
thanks!! i still recall that this ship came mostly by accident to me, and honestly it was a damn fortunate accident at that because they work AMAZINGLY together. i really do like picking ships by virtue of personality and how well those personalities would mesh together, and don't like ships where that isn't directly considered, which, to be fair, i did at first think the two would probably dislike or hate each other! but i ended up thinking about it more and how the two might actually interact, and, honestly? the way they come off to me has always been that, if they can just get over that initial hump, they're WONDERFUL for each other.
i just like the way they parallel each other. both clinging to what they were told they are for their entire lives, something given to them by family and whom they had little choice in, but which they threw themselves into with a passion simply because they had nothing else they thought they could be. both with nasty, tangled histories, upholding systems which exist to eat the world and themselves simply serving as the last victims of it, neither able to fully question their role in it due to how much has been invested, how much would be lost if they had to put it aside. both with ringing alarm bells of psychological distress of all of this, that they cannot hear because they were never taught they were alarm bells, seeking out something that's close enough to what they were told they're supposed to be but without the teeth, without the fear, without the alarm bells. both rejected by their own systems by virtue of some flaw that isn't really a flaw, a fault that has marked them as unable to live up to their own myths. both only really able to come to any terms about all of this when they have other people, people who aren't a part of that system, people who they can depend on and trust, to start pointing it out and offering alternatives.
it's good! i like when two characters' journeys are really one journey, one path together, when they're in the same boat and just haven't realized it yet. i like it when they realize it, when they can finally start talking about it, finding solidarity in, yeah, actually, this IS bullshit, and why would someone do that to them. i like it when they're a conversation with each other, a mirror through which the other can be dismantled and picked apart and seen for what it is, when both act to lay the other out plain, when only the both of them can see the other for who they truly are.
and i like when it gives characters that are all high octane and presence and tension, just some downtime together. i like it when they can finally take off all that they drape themselves in, and just sit there together, vulnerable and exposed. i like how much they talk and have to say to each other, but i like how much they don't talk to each other as well, how much they can just exist in the silence together because the words aren't necessary. i like it when two characters being vulnerable with each other first feels like strangulation, and then, release.
#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#fishyfishyfishtimes#asks#miravi.txt#monster prom#i also really like nontypical needs and needing something that seems almost paradoxical#like it does kinda annoy me how monprom (or the sequels. at least.) talks about redemption arcs#specifically in the sense of another character pushing for another character to be redeemed or whatever#and it always kind of bothers me#as someone who often gets that whole ''oh you're difficult NOW but i know how to make you BETTER'' treatment#i don't think you can come into it expecting anything from them. i don't think you can expect or demand change.#i think you just have to lay there with them and work with what actually helps them and lets them feel better#and i feel like this is. the miravi MO.#like. they help each other because neither set out to do that.#they can be vulnerable with each other because neither expects anything from the other.#because they already like the other as they are. the only thing that needs to change is that they would like to see the other happier.#so you get the nice effect of them changing together. riffing off each other. settling into each other and into themselves.#also i'm trying not to turn this into endless bitching (because i am very good at that)#but considering as i was going through the files. omen has a ''redeemed'' ending which involves two other characters in slayer gear.#apparently they're both having the awful nasty institutions they were born into defanged by the newer writing!#the slayers are bad. don't. don't tell me anyone forgot this. they're bad. is that not. is that not the point of the therapist ending.#don't tell me it's like the merkingdom where they just forgot the awful shit they were doing. no. no. i refuse.#i mean i have NOT played the ending (and will not play the game) so i could be wrong#but this does not seem promising. imo.#aaravi ��� miranda. get me the fuck out of here. wait. wait why are you saying this is good actually. please. get me out.
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
WHY THEY DON'T FUCKING TALK ABOUT IT.
Peony: Thinks everything is all fixed now 🥰
Triandra: Too caught up in her self-loathing and agonizing guilt to even consider speaking with Sharena, the only reason she's on speaking terms with Peony IS because of their closer proximity to each other (being alfar/shared background) and Peony's persistence
Sharena: Talks to Peony, Doesn't talk to Triandra????? Sharena is. The Ignorer. Maybe she wants to reach out, but doesn't know how or even where to begin. But honestly I think she's repressing a bunch of shit too. To speak to Triandra would mean having to Unpack All That.
Alfonse: Speaks to Peony and Triandra on business only. Very professional. Very cordial. Yes there's also the harsh self-criticism and agonizing guilt and holding even his child self to impossible standards like this never should have happened. I should have stopped it. I should have fixed it. I should have been Enough to Prevent This. For my sister to have been in the realm of dreams, her peers being abused and left for dead, what does that say? What does that mean? What happened? How could it have happened? It should have never happened. I should have
#fire emblem#feh#they drive me fucking crazy.#somewhere in the way back of my brain there's an alfonse and triandra storyline.#ggghuhhhh i said i don't think peony knows her actions have ripple effect consequences but like.#peony ALSO knows a lot more than she tends to let on and she actually has a lot of emotional intelligence#i just think. that maybe she's a bit short-sighted. which can come off as naive. but she's not simple-minded.#the biggest thing about the fairies is none of them got to grow up. so all of them still have child like tendencies.#in their thinking/conceptualization of morality and cause and effect. like. i think that's a key component here.#IT'S. REALLY FASCINATING. if you're insane they are actually sooooooo well-written#but that makes writing them ESPECIALLY PEONY. REALLY FUCKINH DIFFICULT.#like i literally Can Not get into her fucking head. i have trouble getting into sharena's head too actually#but i think i just. take too much psychic damage. she's too strong.#fe peony#sharena#fe triandra#fe alfonse
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
Regarding the previous post, I think the way I approach trying to evaluate a piece of art is asking "Do I think the positive things I get out of it outweigh the parts of it that I don't like?" And when I call something a "guilty pleasure" song/show/book/piece of media/etc. it's really more in the sense of, "Given who I am as a person, the flaws I've found in this should be complete dealbreakers for me, but somehow they aren't, and it makes me feel like I'm having an identity crisis."
#like. I think something like...idk shiki or cxgf excels on multiple levels. I understand why I like them. given the things I look for in art#it makes sense that these shows would speak to me because they make the effort to showcase those things I look for. because the people#in charge of those works clearly valued the same kinds of things and cared about seriously exploring them.#but with something like. uh. ctrlz. that is NOT the case and I frequently found myself going 'why would anyone make this writing#decision?' but I still sat through all 3 seasons of it! I still really enjoyed it! those flaws SHOULD have made me give up according to#personal history but they never did. and I very very much genuinely question why. I have NO IDEA why I still care about this#silly convoluted teen drama show so much. but I do. I wrote SO MANY FUCKING POSTS ABOUT IT.#I really love wicked the musical. I've heard many people call it 'hokey' or 'cheesy' or 'objectively bad' but here's the thing! I DON'T#think it's bad!!! like literally at all!!!!!! and it does do some genuinely cool things in regard to the music and the way the characters#develop and what the show says about the nature of prejudice and human connection. is it like. idk Serious™ the way that something like#Parade is? no. but it doesn't have to be. it does what it sets out to do and it does it well and this is why the whole '''objective#evaluation''' thing doesn't actually mean anything. I value thoughtfully-constructed music and dynamic female characters#(which this musical has). I value stories that deal with the complex and messy feelings that come with being a human (which this musical#has). I value stories about 'other'ness and romantic subplots that aren't just built on 'This Girl Is Pretty' (which this musical has).#and I value professional displays of technical vocal ability because I know how fucking DIFFICULT that is (which this musical...if you cast#it well...has).#if you value something else in a musical then yeah you will probably think THIS one is '''objectively bad'''#if you don't see the point of musicals as an art form you will probably think wicked is '''objectively bad'''#do you see where the problem with categorizing analysis like this is??
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Adhd will be like “you’re not dyslexic, you just don’t read the whole word. Good luck with math you dumb fuck”
#emma posts#there is more to dyscalcula and having trouble remembering how to spell long words#but these sure aren’t helping#me. learning Norwegian. reading the sentences and or putting words together to make one ‘I’m so fucking good at l this’d’#okay. now spell the word for ‘difficult’#me crying on the floor because I know it. I can read and hear it. but the letters blend together in my mind#it’s bad enough trying to do this with English. which is my FIRST LANGUAGE#but then it’s like ‘spell complicated words you are learning in another language’ and i feel like smashing my head on the carpet#I can’t speak it for the life of me though. which is actually getting frustrating#without an actual person to explain how to pronounce the words I’m failing so badly#but the primary reason I’ve been learning since April is to read it anyway#and listening is good too. harder though#I’m going to be so fucked up when I start taking Swedish lessons#the word means the same thing and also sounds almost the same (to an English speaker)#BUT THEY SPELL IT VERY DIFFERENTLY!#and with whole new letters#I’m going to write the Norwegian spelling and fail#I will admit that my plan to learn Norwegian first has been working otherwise though#them using fewer unfamiliar characters and being slightly more similar to English really is making it easier to learn#than Swedish first would be. maybe I’m just biased because I’m doing decently at Norwegian#but now when I learn a Swedish word it feels easier because i have two Germanic languages to compare the words to#and one of those languages is even another Nordic language! I dread finding Icelandic lessons though. but it will probably be several years#before I even attempt that! I am doing this because I want to be able to read old family records and objects but learning about#the linguistics of the language family both are in has been super fun and made it actually easier to learn Norwegian!#Spanish is the other language I want to learn but I’ve been putting it off#because it’s more for day to day utility and I can’t fixate on it the same way. I’m terrible at concentrating on it#plus. I’ve already had four Spanish classes so I figure I’ll at least have something to start from! I think I even kept my highschool notes#it’s been really frustrating figuring out which ‘the’ to use. having everything be masculine or feminine has probably been my biggest issue#when making sentences in it. also having had teachers from totally different dialects has been hard in the past#Mexican Spanish can be very diffident from the South American one my highschool teacher taught
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
i am once again shaking myself upsidedown over my laptop in the hopes that the words i want to write come tumbling out of my ears
#since i can't type them normally maybe it'll work this time#HELLOOO BRAIN CAN WE PLEASE WRITE THANKS#please. please i just want to get through this ;;;#i want this chapter to be done!! but we're no where near ready yet!!!#we have so much to get through can we please get it written?? why must you fight me on this???#we only have about 1600/5000 words for this chapter so far ;;;;;;;#like in my brain's defense this is a ROUGH chapter right now#aside from just the topic and whats happening it's got to do a lot with the entire fox team#which just makes it technically difficult on top of what's actually happening#bc i know the foxes would be interjecting and all talking so i'm trying to give them all some time to add something in#but then it's like. we have to make sure they're in character enough. and what they say is in character.#and that we get some natural back-and-forth from them#kevin and dan are really carrying this chapter so far though. i love them.#they're carrying it by necessity rn and also probably later when the topic shifts just a bit#HGHHHH#shh ac#(wit)jitp
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
genuinely felt like a swamp monster just now that was a ghastly amount of slip
#chesschats#i intended to write this post ‘i feel like a swamp monster right now this is abhorrent amounts of slip’ but then i realized there was#absolutely NO chance of me picking up my phone unlocking it and typing out anything comprehensible like that. when i say swamp monster you#must understand how legitimately i mean this i am talking LAYERS of slip#<- finally testing out pottery wheel for the first time to be clear#i am quite bad at it right now! LMAO i don’t remember it being so difficult when i was a kid but i also had a professional watching over my#work and guiding my hands ahdkkg well! there is always room for improvement#i didn’t make anything today just wanted to test the waters get a feel for how it works bc the last time i touched a wheel i was#like six or smth#anyway yeah very messy. i make clay figurines which is also messy but at the same time i feel like it is much more controlled yk you wipe#or rinse off your hands you dip them in more water and you go back to it it’s very calming and centering and you feel very connected to#your work you are bringing a little creature into the world and watching it open its eyes! vs this frantic ‘ah shit my hands are too dry rn#im going to fuck up the texture like this’ -> quickly throw hands in water -> zoom back to the wheel -> repeat many times over#<- not sure if this is the technique i should be using either bahaha i need to watch some videos. also making it sound more frenzied than#it really is. but compared to Figurines#my setup is also way less than ideal i have my water up on my desk im in my chair and then the wheel is on the floor bc it is an extremely#awkward height so im Very much hunched over to work on it and then i need to reach up and stretch to get the water and then back to hunchin#while also trying not to make a total mess with the clay water on my way down etc lmao#the art chronicles#i think i’ll do some more tmrw too and actually try to make smth today was just to get a vibe of the process
0 notes
Text
post. Post-posting clarity where you're like "wtf was I talking about". But also post-posting confusion where you're also like "wtf was I talking about" but it's less about your mental state While Posting and more about "okay. I've written many words. I remember. Approximately 20% of them. What the fuck are the rest of these?"
#I mostly get the latter bc I'm like ''i wrote so much wtf was I talking abouut'' NOT with a judgmental tone like#''oh this makes no sense this is nothing''#But rather it's me going.#''what did I just write?'' and the answer being ''i don't know. I'm scared''#Im wondering if it's an autism/adhd thing if ''i tend to get really fixated on something and when that thing is complex that it becomes#Really difficult or me to tell what I've typed out versus what I've been ruminating on- which can lead to me making similar posts/points#Because I'm trying to make sure I did Actually Write My Thoughts Down So I Dont Forget'' and is also something that happens in conversation#Because sometimes I script interactions in my head to the point I can't tell what's an Actual Memory Of An Interaction versus#My Prediction/Preparation For An Interaction which. Is not fun and feels bad.#OR if it's more of a memory issue/maybe brain fog thing where my brain straight up Doesn't Form The Memory Properly or doesn't let me#Fucking. What's the word. Idk maybe I have some kinda fuckin cognitive dysfunction that makes it really hard to think through what I say#So I just try to power through because otherwise I'll get stuck and forget. Maybe it's both?#Anyway w the cognitive dysfunction/brain fog thing I've been kinda wondering if I have like. Idk some form of trauma to my brain because#Like. It's not uh. Obviously externally noticable I guess but like. When I started noticing my issues it like. Maybe that could be a reason#Ofc it may be my Other Disorders but I tend to fixate on Possible Diagnosed For Things. And while I don't have any concrete like#''that was definitely a TBI'' things there are some things where it's like. ''hm. That might be significant''#ANYWAYS speaking of memory I am garbage at self reporting symptoms bc gun to my head I could not tell you how often I experience them#It's just. Well either I'm currently experiencing them. have a limited number of Specific Memories. Or have 0 fucking clue if it has ever#Happened to me. Because my memory is just really fucking helpful. End post
1 note
·
View note
Text
I feel uninspired and lack motivation for art again so I thought of an ask game for me :)
Send me(or comment) a number from 1-34 and I will draw my corresponding oc
I mentally struggled over whether I should make this post, because ik ocs are niche and probably not many people care for it, but I realized I could have been using those hours to y'know. Actually draw something. So I might as well just post it
#i would do it with AUs but i would actually have to yknow think of a narrative#<- but tbh if you have any requests for au art i will take them 😭😭#also w that and this i cant make any promises if ill actually finish them so please put up w me thanks 🙏#i want to draw but#ive gotten into a bad mindset again#about measuring self worth w outside validation#which is very irritating 😾 stop it brain.#but yeah idk i reblog those posts often abt niche audiences#which im very okay w btw :)#but its still a very difficult thing to engrain that: ah people do care for my art!#and ik its unhealthy to seek validation#and i can and do draw for myself#but its not always fun to me if i cant discuss it yknow :/#if catie makes a piece of art in a silent room does the art really exist? blah blah blah#i need to go suffocate myself in the snow#im happy my winter break is so long but at the same time i think it just puts me in a bad place mentally#lack of social interaction and lack of enrichment and no motivation ig :/#and every night i mean to actually go to bed earlier and boom suddenly its 5 am#and i keep staying up in hopes ill actually yknow start something. art. writing. movie even#and then i just languish UGH#catie.rambling.txt
7 notes
·
View notes