#which leads to me trying to progress too fast. every. single. time
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natandacat · 2 months ago
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Did too much yesterday (got very excited about standing before bed and i was like ooooh its just a few minutes before bed... what could happen) so today is gonna be strictly bed ridden but hey at least yesterday i baked delicious stuffed red peppers and apple terrine (with minimum help, i figured out how to use a low chair to stir things off the heat since the stove is too high for my wheelchair)
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dk79484 · 5 months ago
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you look so cool and pretty wahh?? if you don't mind asking, do you have any weight loss tips or something because i can't stand myself anymore
literally thank you so much😭
i got u, ive used this basic plan to get down 25ishkg so i hope it works for u too! :)
so i usually eat 500-900 calories a day, aiming for 600
though, i do have days where i eat whatever the fuck i feel like to avoid extreme binges, typically these are days when i am out with family. (Usually every 1-3 weeks)
i try to workout at least 30 minutes a day, i prefer leg day over arm day any day, but any sort of cardio will do
i USED to do 10k steps a day which really did help but ive been kinda unmotivated to do it recently
the longest ive fasted for is 24 hours and i genuinely felt like death so ive never done it since. don’t recommend it personally
also my biggest tip is to learn to be okay with waiting, its taken me about a year to get this far (with little gaps in between), the months will pass anyways, so try to stay motivated
i hope this kinda helped, if the calories are a bit too low i did have a portion of time where i ate 1200 a day and was still losing about 1kg a week (just remember a little workout)
oh and i dont weigh myself till the end of the week, cause if i do it everyday and i dont see progress every single day, it leads to breakdowns which leads to binges
seriously thank you so much! i rlly do hope this helped :3
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ladytemeraire · 1 year ago
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Whew. Today is one of those days that definitely demonstrates that progress is nonlinear and unpredictable.
My lunch walk with Sadie went extremely well - we did about 2 miles in 40 minutes, and we were able to walk past another dog across the road! I know this sounds like a "basic" thing but for her, it's a huge deal. She was definitely poofed up and laser focused on the tiny wiener dog, but she didn't growl or bark once, and we did a bunch of rapid-fire 1-2-3 and she disengaged on EVERY 3 and went to "find it" when I tossed the treat into the grass. Big progress and lots of celebrating and happy times!
After work? It was like every single one of her triggers packed into a single walk.
At the very far end of our street, we got surprised by a very large husky coming out of its house on a long lead much closer than I would have liked (across the street and half a block down from us). Initially Sadie was alert but relatively fine, even disengaging; she showed curiosity so I was willing to get a little closer, but shortly after we did she had a BIG reaction. I had to physically drag her back down the street to increase the distance. We did more engage/disengage and 1-2-3 to make the experience more positive before we kept heading away from the dog and back towards our house.
On the other main street, we had a motorcycle come RIPPING by us. There's only a foot of boulevard there and the houses are right by the sidewalk, so basically all I could do was hold onto her handle-collar and harness and reinforce afterwards.
Finally got home and went to throw the poop bag away aaaaaaand Nemesis Dog who lives next door came running on its tether right up to the fence between our properties. Ironically this was the best interaction we've had with this dog - by which I mean Sadie did lunge to the end of her leash by the trash can, but was actually able to disengage and come back down the driveway with me rather than me having to fully drag her away. Small victories I guess?
With all of these, I made sure to give her cheese stick (high value treat) even when she reacted and to speak in a "happy" voice so I wasn't yelling at her. Even when I had to drag her away with the husky, I was firm but not yelling ("this way, come on, we're going this way, leave it"). And after every incident, I made sure to do some "find it" with both high value and regular treats to have her decompress and have a positive experience rather than ending the walk right then and there.
So... yeah. Trying to use the tools in my toolbox and remind myself that I can't predict everything and sometimes all I can do is management rather than preparation and diversion. I'm doing the best I can, and even with her big reactions, she calmed down SO fast compared to where she was a year or two ago.
(Also we got home and she was like "no I'm too tired for dinner" and promptly conked out for two hours on the couch. Literally didn't eat her dinner until like 8:30 pm. Sweet baby.)
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beyondthedustjacket · 5 months ago
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Love, Theoretically | Book Review
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This review contains spoilers. You have been warned!
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Overall Thoughts — This book was so refreshing! It has single-handedly pulled me out of a years long reading slump. It’s the first story in a long time that I genuinely say I had fun reading! No stressing out about traumatic character demises, no overwhelming or dense worldbuilding, no putting it down for months before finally picking it up again. Just straight up, good, I-Want-A-Man-Like-Jack vibes.
Synopsis — Elsie Hannaway is an adjunct professor and trying her best to make her monthly rent, which leads her to taking gigs as a fake girlfriend. But when she puts her best foot forward for her dream career at MIT, Jack Smith-Turner stands in the way at every turn, in more ways than she can count.
Warnings — Chronic illness (Type 1 Diabetes), discussions of a parental death, explicit sexual content, medical situations, mentions of alcohol (a few side characters get drunk at a party), misogyny and sexism, power dynamics, sexual harassment.
Rating — ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
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Plot
Going back to my reading roots with some sweet, sweet contemporary romance. There’s just something about a girl being so overwhelmed by her life, only to be reinvigorated by the thought of sticking it to her worst enemy... who has been in love with her the entire time. The plot progression at no point felt too fast or slow. It was a steady ride of genuine growth between Elsie and Jack. From one-sided loathing to “I want to eat you out for the rest of my life”, their relationship with one another is nothing short of sincere and considerate.
Characters
Elsie Hannaway — I love her! She is a great representation of what it’s like to be in your late twenties with seemingly no relief in sight. Her arc of breaking away from those who stifle her is very well done. She feels real. She has real concerns, real problems, real insecurities. After finishing this book, Elsie has skyrocketed to being one of my favorite protagonists. Jack Smith-Turner — This man. This man. One might say I need this man so fucking bad. And if one did say that, they would be so fucking correct. He’s so casually domineering and unapologetically interested in everything about Elsie. Sure, I was constantly saying how much of a dick he is out loud to myself, but I was doing it with a smile on my face.
Things I Liked
I listened to the audio book for this one, and the narrator, Thérèse Plummer, was great! If this story ever receives an adaptation, I’m going to need her to play every role in various costumes. If you looked up Ali Hazelwood in the dictionary, you’d find the word ‘hilarious’ next to her name. I can’t emphasize how much I smiled during this book! I couldn’t stop smiling — literally kicking my feet and giggling the entire time! Elsie is actually me in disguise, excluding the science stuff. All the way down to eating a cheese block in her room while reading Twilight fanfiction. Carbon copy.
Things I Disliked
The ending felt a little abrupt. Just Elsie handing him a letter was a little anti-climatic for me. I was confused when there wasn’t more after that. Also, the fact that we didn’t meet the infamous Kirk! I need a short story about Cece and her new beau as soon as possible! Just a little spin-off, please and thank you, Ali!
Other Notes
Once again, I want to acknowledge that this book was genuinely fun. I had a great time with it! I think it will be the one that can look back on and say that it successfully pulled me out of a years long reading slump.
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everygame · 1 year ago
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Quartet (Arcade)
Developed/Published by: Sega Released: 10/04/1986 Completed: 18/08/2023 Completion: Played all 32 unique levels. Version Played: MAME Trophies / Achievements: n/a
There’s a convenience store near me that’s got a Quartet machine in it. It’s dusty, surrounded by and covered in boxes, and I genuinely have no idea how long it’s been since it was turned on. Every time I’m in, I check to make sure it’s still there, because I think to myself “I’m sure they’ll take pennies to take this off their hands. If I’ve ever got the kind of living situation where I’ve got the space for something like this…”
Having played through Quartet now–or rather, Quartet 2, which is the two-player (but otherwise identical) version–I will probably be less inclined to haggle over the machine if they decide it’s got sentimental value or something (although I’m fairly certain it’s there because they just don’t want to have to deal with trying to get it out of the shop). Because Quartet is… not great.
Popular wisdom has that this was pushed out in what would have to be considered record time to “clone” Gauntlet as a flashy, four-player arcade game, and I’m definitely interested in how the timeline of that worked, because Gauntlet by all accounts was released in November 1985, didn’t reach Japan until February 1986, and this came out in… the same month???
(Obviously, dates for all these things have to be taken with a grain of salt–I have found at least one source that has it down as not releasing till April, but let’s not split too many hairs.)
It’s possible–and this is pure conjecture–that Quartet was an in-progress side scroller that got rapidly retrofitted to make it as Gauntletty as possible. It’s got a lot of different enemy types and bosses while also having insanely short levels, which makes it seem like something quickly changed and then rushed out, but then again, it might just be how they decided to spend their limited time.
(I’m not sure if it has any significance that the game was one of the very few for Sega’s “pre-System 16” hardware when Fantasy Zone, released within a month of Quartet, was on actual System 16 hardware.)
To speak of Gauntlet for a second: I don’t really get Gauntlet. Gauntlet isn’t the first game to feature continues (SNK’s 1981 title Fantasy has that distinction) but it’s definitely the first game that feels designed to just have credits fed into it continuously. You’ve got constantly sapping health and swarms of enemies that in many cases you can’t avoid getting hit by, meaning that you’re going to end up putting more cash in because your mate hasn’t died yet, leading to that feedback loop where when they die they put another credit in too. To add insult to injury, there’s no ending, so the only actual value is trying to see how far you can get on one credit…
(Turns out if you play well and abuse that enemies don’t spawn off-screen, you can basically play it infinitely on a single credit, but it’s a lot of tedious effort…)
Anyway. Quartet is… basically the same thing: an exercise in feeding credits that doesn’t lead to any sort of ending or even much variety in the levels. It’s a side-scroller with floaty jumps, sure, but that’s not inherently more interesting than Gauntlet’s top-down styling, and if anything there are deeper flaws. For one, you cannot destroy generators (miserable!) and the game is designed around defeating a boss that you find in the level and then taking their key to the exit door. Unfortunately, every time you get hit you go through a lengthy hit animation and throw anything you are carrying behind you on the screen–including power-ups! With every screen swarming with enemies, this gets old fast.
I don’t have any knowledge if Quartet 2 is balanced for two-players, but it doesn’t seem to be especially; I suspect that Quartet is far more manageable with a full four players–more chaotic, but a lot more fun and a lot more survivable (they don’t let you destroy the generators because the levels would rapidly empty of enemies with four playing, I’m certain) and that the game has a little player ranking at the end of each level makes it clear that it’s at least partially a competition which would give you more of a reason to keep playing. 
So not a game for billy-no-mates here, but I’ll tell you what kept me playing: it’s absolutely banging soundtrack! The Quartet Theme is a legit classic, but I’ve got a soft spot for OKI_RAP with its awkward, rappin’ ronnie samples. “S-S-S-Sega! Oh Yeah!” 
Didn’t get bored through my entire playthrough and the soundtrack’s only like eleven minutes long.
Will I ever play it again? When I own that machine and have three friends, sure.
Final Thought: Quartet’s visuals are very charming and seem to be the work of the legendary Reiko Kodama, who had previously done the art for Sega Ninja. More interestingly, perhaps, is that the game was coded by Yoshiki Ooka, who would go on to develop the similarly Gauntlet-inspired Gain Ground!
Support Every Game I’ve Finished on ko-fi! You can pick up a digital copy of exp. 2600, a zine featuring all-exclusive writing at my shop, or join as a supporter at just $1 a month and get articles like this a week early.
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skiyoosmi · 4 years ago
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to the stars above | z.
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featuring. zhongli (genshin impact)
genre. fluff, angst, smut, ancient-liyue!au
word count. 5.4k
marga's notes. aAAAa look look, it's my first commission!! school has kept me really occupied for like the past month but after pulling a few all-nighters, i've finally finished my responsibilities along with this little baby! once again, from the bottom of my heart, thank you to my bubs @ramannnn for trusting me with this one <33
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Nobody knows when the world began, how it came to be and why it continues to be. Even I, whose mind is filled with nothing but wonder for it, have no idea. One thing I am quite sure of... is how mine did.
It all started with him— a man of many titles, different identities yet at the end of the day, all these monikers are the same; it's all him. He adored Liyue more than anything else, knew it like the back of his hand. He went where the winds lead him, stayed where the moon shines upon him, stood where the golden sun kissed his skin. He found serenity in the walks he travels as he goes about his day, the sceneries his eyes take in and the calm sounds the nature resonates for him. And as if it was fate decided upon by the Celestia, it led him to me. Suddenly, my little world that used to be nothing became everything... quickly and all at once.
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An exasperated sigh escapes from my lips, frustration and disappointment filling my whole being as I stare at the blank parchment paper I held in my hands. Another day was again wasted with no progress, I thought, mentally beating myself up for not being productive enough. Before I could further drown myself into such pessimistic ideas, I snap out of it and let my eyes cherish the view that lies ahead of me. Though I feel a little guilty for taking Vermeer's place, I can only whisper an apology with little to no sincerity. Because truly, nothing can beat the picturesque landscape of Luhua Pool— the crystal clear waters that would most probably reflect my face like a mirror if I were to ever look at it, the ruins that ignited the spark of curiosity within me, wondering about the pasts it holds and the stillness and feeling of peace it gives me as I sit in this cliff. Feeling somewhat a bit better, I place my things on top of the old bag I bring no matter where I go. There's always a better day for writing, I tell myself as a form of consolation, bringing my slim arms up to begin stretching. I've been sitting on this log for quite a long time now, after all.
"It seems like you are in a bit of a dilemma," a deep voice comments from behind me. Out of surprise, I lightly jump and turn my head towards the stranger. Right at that moment, it felt as if all the air circulating inside my body had been depleted. Captivating was an understatement as to how he appeared before me. With the sunlight striking his face and accenting his unique features further, he stood with his hands behind him, head tilted as he looked at me with interest, all while keeping his dignified posture.
"Oh, hello. I am afraid so, yes," I respond, or rather, mutter under my breath since I was not really used to having sudden encounters with other people, nor am I fond of it. I tend to keep to myself, finding it much more peaceful than having to tend to others' overbearing expectations and demands which is partly the reason why I chose to live in the outskirts, far from the center of Liyue that contrasts my comfortable abode, "I apologize. I failed to realize that somebody other than Vermeer liked to stay here," I told him, arching my eyebrows a little when he let out a breathy chuckle.
"Oh, you have no need for such formal apologies. I do not always go here, at least probably not as often as the man you call Vermeer. I was simply taking a walk and I think I got carried away by Liyue's view and eventually, my feet led me here," he explains, a hint of sheepishness present in his tone, "and I guess I'll have to thank my feet for that."
Because it led me to you, interesting one. For many years, it will remain unspoken, kept by the strange man to himself and unveiled once his heart gives up from the resistance he upholds.
For the following hours of lounging around Luhua Pool, I learned a lot about the stranger— he calls himself "Morax," and like the god of Liyue, he enjoyed history and is extremely knowledgeable about it, aspiring to know and understand everything of the world, he often brews tea, even going as far as inviting me once I am free from any form of work. Just as he shared facts about himself, I did too.
"So, Cheng, you said you have a bit of a dilemma?" he inquires, slightly angling his head towards the direction of the side I'm sitting on. I nod my head up and down, mouth forming into a small pout of disappointment as I remember that today has not been that progressive.
"Yes. I am trying to write a novel, you see. Something that will leave an impact on this world so that even if I may pass, I will still live on the memories of people," I tell him, an ambitious expression present on my face. He hums, eyes going over the terraces that make up the current view we have and the two huge statues standing by the ruins, "Why so?"
I pause for a moment to think of a reply, "I guess I just do not want to let someone alone in this cold world. Wouldn't that be too cruel and sad, to just leave them with nothing?"
If I'm able to write words that will provide comfort to my readers, then maybe... just maybe the world will be less lonely... even for just a little bit. At least, that's what I thought as silence consumed us, the sun setting as if to remind us that finally, another day is nearing its end. Now, what will tomorrow bring?
"Well then, I do hope I will be able to read at least some of your works at least once," he speaks as he stands up, lightly dusting away his clothes, "It certainly has been a pleasure to be your company, Cheng."
As he walks down the slope of the hill, his somewhat broad back facing me, I call out, "Will you be back?"
He stops and turns, a soft smile is plastered on his face as he responds, "Only time will tell."
But time was no friend of mine. At least that's what I have come to realize as many days passed without him returning to this place. Though maybe it's only because it almost felt as if time slowed down and I was only eager to see him again, something I have scolded myself to— what a fragile heart do I have to already seek a stranger's presence? That is what others call love at first sight, a devilish portion of my mind whispered cheekily within me and I gasped in disbelief, "Absolutely not," I lightly slap both of my cheeks, "I'm just too coped up in my own world. I probably need to go see more people."
That thought remains a simple yearning though because once again, I find myself lounging around the same spot in Luhua, a quiet hope ignited within me, fulfilled when I hear the familiar voice he adorns as he speaks, "You're here."
I release a sound that is between a giggle and a breathy chuckle, "And I see your feet had led you here once more?"
"They were curious, or should I say... I was," he explains as he takes a seat beside me, his posture remaining solid despite the uncomfortable position.
"Of what?" I ask.
"Of you," he simply replies, unaware of the sudden yet unsurprising effect it had on my heart that was already beating rapidly with just his mere presence. I try not to be so showy of it though, too embarrassed to even think of how fast I became fond of him.
But it was no wonder. After all, he himself was an interesting one; from the way he carries himself, the way he speaks, and the way he's just him... all and every action hold so much dignity that it just leaves me almost breathless and in awe every single time my eyes finds their way to his figure— and to think that this was just our second meeting? My mother would most probably let out the most shameless giggle as I tell her these thoughts, pushing me and teasing me like a normal person in their teens would. I shake my head to get out of these thoughts, listening to Morax as he tells another wonderful tale, almost making me think that he lived it himself with how he knew it, going over even with the smallest details.
"You know, Morax, you have such a good memory to remember all of those things despite simply hearing about it," I suddenly speak up in the midst of the silence that engulfed us while he tries to think of the next story to tell, "I hope I can stay in them too... in your memories, I mean. I know I am far from being the most interesting person but for some reason, I wish for that."
He pauses, eyes trailing slowly towards me, beyond my knowledge, before he lets out a somber smile. You already are, is another one of him that becomes an afterthought.
I heaved out a sigh before shaking my head again, "Ah! Why do I keep having such lonely thoughts? Forget about that. Please do not mind me, alright? I think I really need to stop being stuck in the mountains."
I pick up my small bag and shuffle inside it, letting out a quiet sound of 'aha!' as a sort of celebration when I successfully got a small book out, "Here."
He blinked his eyes in confusion, wondering what it was I handed to him so I spoke in delight, "You told me you wanted to read at least one of my works so, here. I am warning you though, it is not like the ones that sell best in the bookstores. It might bore you, or weird you out like what others say."
"What others say?"
"They say it's too unrealistic, too impossible... but I believe otherwise. We live in a world where gods and adepti watch over us. What makes my story impossible then?" I ponder, him still being confused.
"What is it about anyway?" He asks, having no idea of what the context my book had.
"It's about an archon who began living as a simple man in Liyue."
Our meetings became more frequent after that and eventually, we got comfortable with even just the presence of each other, having no need for long talks and such, but just peace. Today, like any other day, Morax was just reading the book I gave him, while I was thinking of what my next story would be about. Occasionally, he looks at me with an odd expression that is almost equivalent to astonishment, as if I have done something so great that it made him look at me that way.
"What made you think of this plot?" he asks all of a sudden, not forgetting to put a piece of paper that served as a bookmark on the page where he stopped just in case he accidentally closed it.
I hum, thinking about my answer to his question, "Hmm. Truth to be told, it was just a mere wonder for me. Archons and the adepti, although not entirely immortal, live so much longer than an average human does, watching over us as we go about our daily lives, waiting for sudden wars to break out and then fight the enemies that attack us. Growing up, those were the things that all the people around me told me. So I began to wonder, do they ever get tired? Is it not too taxing to keep on doing that? What if... they just lived with us, among the crowds? Because I think it is too lonely wherever they are. Would it not be better if they were with us, rather than above us, so they could at least have memories to live by?"
Morax does not give a response, or rather, he finds it difficult to find one. Still, it does not stop the affection that spreads within him. He does not say it out loud, but for someone who prefers to be alone, Cheng was full of empathy. And somehow, that did wonders to Morax's heart.
"Now that I think about it, I kind of actually want to address my books to them now," I hum once more, "It would be like a message for them: Do not be too lonely even if we pass. Because of your help, through these stories, we can show you that we lived a good life."
I huff as soon as I finish my sentence, "Although one of those who read it said that was impossible, because according to them, why would archons give up their power to live a life where there is only simplicity?"
Morax let out a sound that made it look as if he got offended himself, "Archons can do that, can they not?"
"I know! That was what I was saying to them. Anyway, I am not forcing them to like what I wrote. It's just a story, after all. It can do no harm," I shrug, beginning to fix my belongings as the sun began to set, "I should go now, Morax. It is still quite a long walk to my home."
"I want to live a good life too," he suddenly tells me, making me halt and turn to him in confusion, "With you. The good life and memories you shall tell in your stories, can I be part of them too?"
The universe does not stop for anyone, nor does time— science will consistently proclaim this fact matter what timeline we shall live in. No matter how much someone begs to the Celestia to grant their wish of controlling, or stopping time, no one will be able to do such things. But somehow, it seems like when it comes to him, everything is possible as I feel my world stop at his words, just like the way it also began when I met him. And as if planets were colliding with each other, I suddenly felt my heart crash upon him and as if out of instinct, I let go of the truth.
"Of course. It would be the greatest thing to have you."
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Life was strange in its own way. That is what I have come to realize in this simple life of mine.
Despite the fact that the "me" of the previous year has never even thought about putting my whole being on my sleeve, it is pleasingly odd how right now, I find myself in this kind of situation with the man who swept me right under my feet and claimed my heart as his.
“You're cold," I whisper amidst the silence of the night in my abode, my index tracing the ears of the man who had me sitting right on his lap, the shorter strands of his silky hair tucked behind them. So, so alluring.
He takes hold of my wrist, planting a soft kiss on its side, all while maintaining eye contact as he quietly drawls, "Then I suppose you can keep me warm tonight. Will you?"
As if in a trance, I nod my head, letting him take the lead as he laid me down, back against the soft mattress, him following on top with his arms supporting his build. With arising confidence, I circle my arms around him and pull him down, bringing our lips together, a sigh of relief escaping both of our mouths as if to say, "Finally."
I wonder if he thinks the same way as I do— that this was Celestia in its own way. I felt like I could do anything as long as it was with him. The kiss felt like the power we once suppressed from each other became a supernova that changed our world's course all of a sudden. But despite the tension and heat we both emitted at the moment, there is a warmth that engulfs me the same time he fully wraps his arms around me.
I am here. I will always be here.
No noise disturbs the peace we have created, only the quiet sound of crickets reach our ears but even that fails to distract him from what he's doing. He gently tugs on the sash that keeps my coat tied. Nimble fingers explore the remains of my clothing, loosening all until I am set free from them.
His eyes raked over my body, an expression of awe plastered on his face for so long that it made me somewhat conscious. Because as he unravels his to me, I am enlightened by the fact that my figure is nothing worth comparing to his — not even close. A hint of sweat glints from his skin due to the moonlight, making him look even more ethereal. But who was I to complain?
So instead, I look down, fiddling a little with my fingers as I feel my cheeks heat up. How is it that I only realize now what kind of situation we are currently in? Before I further drown in such shameless thoughts, he lifts my head up by the chin, an amused look on his usually-gentle face, "Are you feeling shy, beloved?"
I meekly nodded, to which he lets out a soft laugh and whispers, "Don't be. You are the epitome of beauty itself. If you don't believe me, allow me to show you nothing but truth tonight, I swear under the moon and all these stars."
He dips down and captures my lips in a kiss once again with more passion, if it was still even possible.
"You are made for me, as I'm made for you," he proclaims as he thrusts inside me after minutes of preparation, soft pants and groans following his statements. I can only whimper in response, pain evident in my tone at first with my hands lightly clawing at his back. I pray to the heavens above that they don't leave awful marks after this.
He halts and utters an apology, thumb caressing the bone of my cheeks while he waits for me to adjust. He scans my face after a few seconds, relief flashing in his eyes when I nod for him to continue.
"I... b..." I try to speak out but the pleasure overwrites any sensical thought that goes through my mind. He slows down a little, looking over my face and smiles, urging me to talk.
"Stay with me, beloved. We still have all night," he tells me, encouraging me to voice what has been on my mind.
"I... I belong to you, always have and always will..." I manage to croak out, voice quite hoarse due to the sounds that I let out previously. Perhaps pleased with what I have proclaimed, he begins going even deeper and at the same moment, I begin falling deeper.
"Yes, yes, you do," he repeats like a mantra, his voice sounding more and more desperate to reach his high. I cry out with him, creating a harmony that even the best bards shall be ashamed.
It was a long night— the longest yet most beautiful night I have ever had in this simple life of mine. And in that moment, as we reach the stars together, I knew right there and then that this man is someone who will be etched in my heart for as long as I live, deep into its roots— for him, it shall beat and it shall love.
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You, who are reading this, most probably have had enough of these teeth-rotting praises I kept on writing. But what can I do except to apologize? These words are the only ones that can flow out of my mind and mouth to show how magnificent it was to be loved by him.
Well, nothing significant really changed. He was still the same gentleman I met, if anything, more gentle. Just like in the beginning, he made my heart flutter every chance he gets, no matter how many years have already passed.
We built a dynasty together.
But maybe I should have known that ours were also bound to crumble like the ones that have long existed even way before us.
Days, months and years went on, I realized that he was actually the opposite of me— unlike me who was clearly not parallel with time, he held it right on the palms of his hand. I was not blind, nor was I a fool, I can clearly see how he looks like he has not aged a day, all while I was here, maturing more and more each second that passed by, the amount of signs of me aging increasing significantly.
Morax. Knowledgeable of history as if he lived it himself. Time. All these thoughts eventually congest my mind as realization dawns upon me. He was not merely a man named after the god himself— Morax was him, he was Morax.
"How appalling," I mutter with a hint of sadness and dismay in my tone. I stood in front of the mirror, fingers hovering over my face, wrinkles appearing as I scrunch it. A pair of firm arms snake its way around my lean waist, chin resting on one of my shoulders as he hums his words, "What has got your beautiful mind occupied, my beloved?"
Taking hold of his arms, I turn my body around to face him, a somewhat melancholic smile etched on my face as I look up at his much taller frame, "You are a sight to behold, even to this day." He arches one eyebrow out of amusement and curiosity, wondering why I suddenly started pouring him compliments. After all, my shyness prevents me from consistently doing so. Nonetheless, I continue speaking, "I wish... I could be with you even when everything changes into a whole new world."
I lifted a hand up to cup his cheeks and began rubbing it lovingly, a lone tear finally dropping from my eye as soon as I closed it, "but I cannot, I do not have the ability to do so... I am but a mere mortal, after all."
His eyes widen as he finally discerns my actions and concerns, immediately opening his mouth in hopes of consoling me but I beat him into speaking, "It's alright, Morax. I have been putting the pieces together for a while now. I am in no way angry. I just..." I pause, gulping hard before my lips start to quiver, "... I cannot imagine how lonely it must have been. And now... I think about it and I... I do not want to leave you alone again."
My cries eventually start becoming louder, something that is very new to the both of us, seeing as I have always been composed. Love can change a person into a whole new being. I remember a book I have read once and at the moment, I can only agree. Maybe it was the way my heart clenches at the mere thought of him walking alone, or the way I can imagine us taking our last breaths together yet I know that will never happen— but either way, it was painful.
He whispers sweet nothings to my ears, placing light kisses on my temple as he leads us to the bedroom to rest once my tears have finally ceased and I have calmed down. His hold on me gets tighter every time I let out a small hiccup due to crying, almost as if he was telling me that he was feeling the same pain as I was.
Hours pass by as we lay in silence. My tears have long dried up but we remain coped up in each other's arms.
"Would it not be interesting if you bear the name Zhongli?" I ask him in a somewhat croaky voice.
He peers down and tilts his head, "Now where did that thought come from?"
I shrug, or at least try to, and look up at the ceiling as we shift our positions to lay on our back, hands finding one another and intertwining, "Hmm... nowhere. Just a name I wanted to give you in case that you are needing a new one."
"Oh? How come it would be interesting then?"
I look at him with a comforting yet sad smile.
"Because it means it's time to leave, to go somewhere far away... and unfortunately, I will have to leave soon."
He furrowed his eyebrows together, "Do not say that. Who knows? Maybe you will be able to live a hundred years by my side. Besides, I think it sounds lonely. I do not think I would want to get reminded of the fact that you are not here with me."
I hum, "But if you bear the name I gave you, wouldn't it feel like I never went away? That no matter where your feet take you, no matter how far you go, I am and will always be with you, just as I have vowed."
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The wooden door leading to my writing room slowly slides open and Morax's head peers in, an adorable smile plastered on his face, "You have been quite busy these days, beloved. I do not wish to disturb you but I am starting to long for your presence."
I let out a shameless giggle, "Alright, alright. Just let me write down a few more words while I still have ideas to input."
He peeks on the parchment paper out of curiosity, taken aback when he finds his name on it, "You are writing about us?"
I nod proudly, "My last piece."
"... But why?"
I smile and approach him, taking his hand and placing my forehead against his after he lowers his head down to my level, "I told you, did I not? I do not wish to leave the person I love with nothing. So that you will not be lonely, my words will be with you. I will be with you, always..."
"... and to tell the gods... to tell you, that I loved every second of my life with you— that it was, indeed, a good life."
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"Who are you, young man? Are you my son?" I speak with a very hoarse voice, squinting my eyes at the figure in front of me, as if my poor vision will allow me to do that.
I hear a melancholic yet gentle sigh come from him before he takes my rough hands and looks afar, "Don't mind me. I'm just someone who vowed to be with you for as long as time lets us."
"Oh.... really? That’s quite endearing," I hum, "Well, may I know your name?"
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"This… I think I may just have an idea to whom this book is for," Paimon trails off, looking over at the traveler who was in the same trance as her, "Paimon thinks we should let the strange person we saw a while ago give this directly to Zhongli!"
Lumine nods, turning around and starting to run towards the direction they were at previously, recalling the person named Cheng who gave them the novel they just finished reading. They were unique, dressed in layers of robes and it was almost as if they lived in the old times of Liyue. Even the way they talked and moved screamed ancient.
Just as they turned the corner, a woman near the Liuli Pavilion called them over, "Traveler! Here!" As they approach, Lumine cranes her neck to look around the area but to no avail, the strange person was long gone.
"Are you two alright?" the woman asks, much to their confusion, "I saw you talking to literal air awhile ago and I was worried you have eaten something strange."
The pair looks at each other in surprise before Paimon replies, "You didn't see anyone? Like a person dressed in the strangest attire? They dressed really anciently!"
The door of the Liuli Pavilion opens and there goes Zhongli, a calm expression morphing to an awkward one when he realizes he barged into an ongoing conversation. He apologizes for the disturbance and despite the curiosity he had upon overhearing bits of Paimon's statements, he starts his walk back to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. At least not until he hears Paimon call his name, "Zhongli! Wait! A person named Cheng. Do you know them?"
He abruptly stops and turns to the two, eyes wide for a second before it returns to his usual demeanor, "How... how do you know of them?"
"We met them," Paimon says, as if it was the simplest thing to do, "Well, honestly, we don't know because we were apparently speaking to nothing but air! It's so odd!"
He stays still, honestly having no idea of what response he should give them because he himself found it hard to believe.
"Well anyway, they asked us to give you this nov— wait, where is it? It was just in your hands a while ago, Traveler!"
In the midst of the loud chaos made by the two in the middle of Liyue, he thinks he knows what to do and where to go now.
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It was the day of the Rite of Parting, an event where he's supposed to be taking part of, even just a part of the audience. But he finds himself hanging around the Wanwen Bookhouse, eyes scanning the shelves until it stops at a familiar name engraved on the cover of a book.
"Oh! Greetings, Mr. Zhongli! I see you took a liking to a very great and romantic novel," Jifang comments as she sees the book in his hands.
He looks at her, "Is it really great?"
She gasps in delight, "Yes, indeed! Almost all of the Liyue folks have enjoyed this story! You can say it is a classic, especially for readers! Cheng definitely outdid themselves with this one! Such a mysterious person yet equally amazing. Imagine? Being able to make such a beautiful love story with Morax? They don’t mention the present name they gave Morax though, such a shame. Maybe it was due to old age, they wrote it until the last moments of their life after all. Anyway, I have to get back to work but enjoy reading that masterpiece!"
He feels his heart swell in pride upon knowing his lover had his wish come true. His nimble fingers carefully open the pages of the book and hours later, as he sat inside the Funeral Parlor after taking the novel home, he finds himself absorbing each and every word Cheng have written, the loneliness sitting idly inside him subsiding little by little.
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I found solace in the countless cups of tea you brew whenever I encounter distress with my works, the endless stories you tell with a smile so beautiful that not even the most heavenly scenery can vanquish, but most of them all, the feeling of your hand intertwining with mine, providing me with serenity no one else has ever done before. Under the moonlit night of Liyue, I remember your wistful amber eyes, staring deep into my soul as you proclaim your love and desire for me. How foolish was it of me to think that I could live this life without even experiencing such warmth and intimacy?
It is a banality, really — how I wish to become a well-known writer with unique tales and yet the story I am telling is something so common to folks that they have most probably heard similar ones before. But I guess this is what it means to love and to be loved. Everything is like a cycle that just keeps on being repeated, yet we never get tired of it, of the feelings it brings. So, thank you, Morax. Words will never be sufficient to show how grateful I am to you for showing me a whole new world but I suppose this is still a way for me to give back to you.
With this little book of mine, I hope my heart reaches yours regardless of how many eras may have passed before and after us. So, my beloved, do not be too lonely without me. Even if you find yourself longing for my presence, just open this and my heart shall be with you.
This belongs to you, it always will.
And I do, as well.
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forever-rogue · 4 years ago
Note
Hi! If you're taking requests can I please request a fluffy piece of where Javi and his f!partner fell in love and Javi brings her home to Texas for the first time to meet his Dad. And at some point his Dad sees them being so cute and sweet with eachother and he's never seen Javi so happy before.
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A/N: Enjoy some fluff and softness!
Pairing: Javi x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 2.3k
Warnings: mentions of pregnancy
MASTERLIST
JAVIER MASTERLIST
»»————- ♡ ————-««
“You’re nervous,” Javier’s tone was filled with amusement as he walked into the bedroom to find you in front of the mirror, holding up two different outfit options. The look on your face was nothing but pure distress as you realized that one outfit was too formal and the other was almost too informal. Sighing, you turned to him with a pout on your lips as held up the outfits, “Dulzura - what’s going on?”
“I’m not nervous!” 
“I’ve known you for years, I know that look on your face,” he came over and took both hangers from your hands and tossed them on the bed. Large, warm hands found your face as he pulled you in for a gentle, saccharine kiss, “calma, mi alma.”
“I’m not nervous, Javier,” you scoffed indignantly as he quirked a brow in question, "I'm fucking terrified! I'm meeting your whole family today for the first time! How am I not supposed to be nervous?"
"It'll be fine-"
"At your cousin's wedding-"
"They're going to adore you-"
"They're meeting me - your fiance - for the first time. At a huge wedding. With your entire family there,” you huffed, feeling your churn at the mere thought of it all, “it’s a little scary, Javi. And I don’t want them to think I’m trying to take away attention from anybody. I don’t want to be that person.”
“You’ve taken down Escobar and Cali,” he laughed warmly before pulling you into his arms as you buried your face into his shoulder, “and you’re nervous about a wedding?”
“Much scarier,” it was a pathetic whimper in protest.
“They already know about you,” he reminded you gently, “it’s not like this is the first they’re hearing about you.”
“I know,” pulling back, you cast a dismal glance at the outfits that were unceremoniously dumped on your bed, “I just want them to like me. It’s your family, Javi, they’ll be my family too.”
“They’re going to love you,” he insisted with an air of finality before pressing a kiss to your forehead. You couldn’t help but grin at him; the two of you had been through so much together and apart, and you knew that you really could handle anything life through you at the two of you, but this seemed...different. Insurmountable. 
Gone were the days of chasing after criminals and bad guys through the streets and jungles of Colombia and in were the days of quiet, domestic bliss. You’d already started building a home in Texas with him, and taken on the simple life you’d been dreaming of for some time. Nothing was going to take that away from you and get it still terrified you. 
“I love you,” you whispered as he offered you the grin you had fallen in love with so long ago. His soft brown eyes crinkled in the corners as his single dimple made its appearance, “Javi.”
“I love you,” he promised, “come on, let’s finish getting ready and get this over with. I have a few plans for you tonight.”
“Mhmm,” you rested your hands on his broad chest before lightly pushing back, causing him to jokingly pout at you. As soon as you heard the world plans, something sparked within you and you immediately knew what you wanted to wear. Turning towards the closet, you offered him a cheeky wink before pulling out a lacy red dress. His eyes instantly widened at the sight of the dress; it had always been one of his favorites on you, “what do you think? Too much?”
“It’s perfect, Dulzra,” he had to work to hold back a groan as he pictured you in it, “you’re going to knock them dead.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
Of course, Javier had been right. His family had taken to you like fish to water. Almost as if they could sense that they might overwhelm you all at once, they came over in small droves to introduce themselves and welcome you to their family. Honestly, you didn’t even have to say much as they were happy to do all the talking and Javier was more than happy to talk - brag - about you in detail and tell them everything about you. You were practically glowing from the praise, and found it easy and effortless to find your place within it all. 
But the singular most important person was Chucho - Javier’s father. You hoped he would like you, hoped he would think you were good for his son, hoped he would know how much you loved Javier. 
You were sitting at the table, eating some dessert and chatting with one of Javier’s cousins, Adrianna, when you heard a throat clear from behind you. Turning around, you found Chucho offering you a small smile and extended his hand to you.
“Do you have a moment, mija?” he asked softly as you nodded. Of course you weren’t about to turn him down. Your heart thumped nervously as you nodded and stood up, taking his hand while you tried to calm your racing mind; this wasn’t anything bad, this was good and you had nothing to worry about. Still - it felt like a huge task. 
“Of course,” you offered up a nervous smile as you let him lead you outside of the small reception hall and out into the gardens. You had spotted Javier talking to a few people, a beer clutched in his hand, and a megawatt grin on his face as he laughed at something. It was enough to suck the air from your lungs as you realized just how much you loved this man. Your longing little glance wasn’t lost on Chucho, who simply laughed to himself. As soon as you stepped outside, you took in a long breath of fresh air. You were glad you had come to Texas with Javier; it was beautiful here and you were happy to build a home, a family - a life here. 
“You really love him, don’t you?” he asked as he sat down on one of the benches and beckoned for you to join him. A flush of warmth rose up in your chest and cheeks as you nodded and sat down next to him, “I can tell. He loves you too - won’t ever stop talking about you. And the way he looks at you...I’ve never seen him look at anyone like that before.”
“Not even-”
“Not even Lorraine,” he explained as you let a small sigh of relief as he laughed at you, “you have nothing to worry about, mija. Javier’s not going anywhere. Do you know about the first time he told me about you?”
“No,” you cringed slightly, remembering the beginning of your relationship - just your work relationship. Needless to say it was not love at first; the two of you were constantly at each other’s throats, always having to have the last word. It was a slow progression from rivals to friends to lovers; but when you started falling in love with him, it was fast and hard and there was no stopping it.  You never really believed in soul mates, or someone being the one, but with Javier...you just knew. He was the one and only for you. Just like he had changed your perspective on many things, you had caused him to completely change too. You made him in the best possible version of himself, he always claimed.
“Oh mija,” he laughed as he took a sip of his beer, “he called me and he was absolutely livid, he went on and on about the new partner he had, how he couldn’t stand her, how she was too much and he was positive she wouldn’t last.”
“Yeah, that sounds about right. Javi and I didn’t like each other for a long time,” you laughed; you still remembered the look on his face the day you had met him. It was anything but love back then, “we were at it for a long time. I didn’t know if we’d ever get along but...obviously things turned out very differently. I love him, a lot. More than anything really.”
“It’s obvious,” he agreed, “I can just see it in the way the two of you look at each other. He’s different now - better, more himself. You’ve helped him more than now.”
“He’s helped me too,” you admitted softly. The two of you had been through so much both separately and together - more darkness and demons than many people have ever seen. But it was like you always managed to chase the darkness away from one another, bringing in some light and love into each other’s lives in every which way,  I really don’t know what I’d do without him. I hope...I hope I have your blessing to marry your son. Nothing in the world would make me happier.”
“Of course,” he took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze as you sniffled lightly in an attempt to hold back your tears, “our family is yours. Javier made the best choice ever with you.”
“You have no idea how much that means to me,” you grinned at him and suddenly the whole world seemed lighter. You knew that in the end you would stay with Javier, no matter what happened, but knowing you were so welcome in their family and already so loved made everything better, “I was so nervous at first...I know how much you mean to Javi, and it means a lot to me too.”
“You’re very important to us too,” he promised, “we’ve been looking forward to meeting you since the day he told us about you. Will you tell me one thing? And if Javier doesn’t know yet, I promise I won’t breathe a word to him…”
“What is it?” your heart leapt in your chest as you wondered what he could be asking you, although you had a feeling you knew. 
“When is my grand baby coming? When are you due?” as soon as he asked his question your jaw dropped and you looked at him with wide eyes. You weren’t even showing yet, and didn’t think it was that obvious, “oh come on, I had a wife once, and she had Javier. I’ve been around enough pregnant women to know when someone is expecting. Plus you didn’t touch a drop of alcohol - and that’s kind of apparent at a wedding. He doesn’t know, does he?”
“I found out a few weeks ago,” you admitted sheepishly, a hand subconsciously going to your belly, “I’m almost three months along. We weren’t planning it or not planning it, and it just happened. It took me by surprise too. But I...I’m so excited. Javier is going to be a great father and I’m so excited to share all of this with him. I never thought I wanted all of this - a husband, a child, a home and a family but...I do. With Javier. Sure, things aren’t always perfect, but I wouldn’t want anyone else.”
“Kids in love,” he laughed lightly as you shrugged in agreement, “when are you going to tell him?”
“Do you think I should tell Javier now?”
“Tell Javier what?” at the sound of his familiar voice, you turned around and found Javier walking up to the two of you. You looked nervously at Chucho for what to do, but he just jerked his head in Javier’s direction and nodded, “what’s wrong, Dulzura?”
“Javi,” you stood up and reached for his hand, which he eagerly took and laced his fingers together with yours. You kissed his cheek before softly whispering, “I have something big to tell you.”
“Something big to tell me?” he asked with a raised eyebrow, “what - you’re nervous again...it’s not like we’re going to have a baby or anything!”
At his declaration, your mouth dropped and you gaped at him like a fish out of water for a few moments. Noticing your hesitation, his face went through a series of expressions, “umm...Javier? You’re going to be a father, my love. So yes, it is like we’re having a baby.”
“Seriously?” he asked in surprise as his hands went to either side of your face and he wiped away the few tears that had rolled down your cheeks, “Dulzura…”
“Surprise,” you grinned at him before he kissed you, “are you happy, Javi? Please tell me you’re happy.”
“I am perfect,” his reassurance was gentle and soft as he nuzzled his nose against yours, “this is everything I never knew I wanted. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, Javier.”
»»————- ♡ ————-««
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sister-dear · 3 years ago
Text
Sentence Structure and Flow
Someone on discord asked me about how I structure sentences and how I learned to write. I’m going to do my best to answer! Hopefully it’s useful. It got long, so I made it a Tumblr post.
On learning to write:
Sky_squido, the author of “What Hyrule Hadn’t Seen” made this presentation and there were several points in it that I found incredibly helpful.
The two main ideas that I found most beneficial:
It’s about the ~vibes. Every story or scene has some kind of overall theme or emotion. Once you’re far enough into your story to have found what that is, edit your word choice to match. If a word technically works but doesn’t fit the mood, replace it with something else. The actual definition of a word is sometimes less important than the emotion that word conveys.
Verbs are incredibly important. If you’re having trouble with your sentence structure - if your story seems boring or like the prose drags - look at your verbs. I tend to use “is” as a verb far too often (or “was” for those of you who write past tense), so a lot of my editing comes down to reworking some sentences to make the stronger, more interesting words be the action words. So instead of “Legend was walking,” the sentence would be “Legend walked.” Or, even better, “Legend strolled/stalked/slouched along.” We’ve gone from a passive sentence to something that tells us, in engaging fashion, not just what Legend’s doing but how he’s doing it and maybe even a little about how he’s feeling.
Filter Words
Another post I found incredibly helpful: examples of how to cut out ‘filter words.’ It’s great for adding urgency, establishing tone, and introducing strong descriptions into your writing. Basically, this is how to put ‘show, don’t tell,’ into practice at a sentence-structure level. I use this approach a lot when it comes to conveying character emotion.
A couple other points
Variation is your friend.
Repeating things draws attention.
Description slows things down.
1. Variation is your friend.
For most writing, it’s a good idea to vary your sentence structure and length. Dialogue with no tags is rapid. Same with short sentences. Short and choppy reads disjointed and fast. This also applies to paragraph lengths! Longer sentences and paragraphs read slower, and in turn cause your reader to linger; sometimes maybe even linger too much. A combination keeps things interesting.
Too many long sections in a row - be they sentences or paragraphs - causes reader fatigue. Don’t be afraid to break those up. Let your readers take a breather.
If all your sentences start the same way, rework some of them. Lead with the action in one sentence and the subject in the next.
Starting a new paragraph gets a reader’s attention. You can use this for punch.
You should have one topic, or one person speaking, per paragraph.
Important things go at the start of the paragraph. Readers won’t tend to remember as much stuff from the middle or ends. Speed readers might not read those sections at all. The above note about one topic per paragraph? This is why.
2. Repeating things draws attention.
This applies to everything from individual words to overall themes to something like a series of sentences all with the same structure. It can work for you or against you.
A lot of my editing winds up being me reworking sentences to avoid using the same word too closely in succession. I’m not talking basic words here, like ‘he’ and ‘said.’ Those are non-words. If you have enough strong words around them, they disappear. They’re fine. But to use a snippet from a current work in progress:
...(Legend) bares his teeth, river water dripping off his hair and sticking his tunic to his legs. He braces his legs, wet muck squelching over the sides of his boots.
I wound up changing to “sticking his tunic to his thighs” to avoid the repeated word ��legs.” I didn’t want to draw attention to his legs themselves, but the state of them. “He braces his feet,” would also work, or I could just cut the sentence down. “He braces,” does the trick just as well, and might be what I go with for the final draft. If the sentence makes sense without the word, then you can let the unneeded word go and your writing will often be stronger for it.
This can be much harder to do with nouns than verbs. Sometimes you just need to call a sword a sword. That’s usually where I start to alternate between a small group of words. “Sword,” “blade,” and “weapon” can all be alternated between to try to avoid using the same word too close together. You might also be able to get around using the problem word at all, as in the example above.
Another note on non-words. Names and pronouns qualify! You can use them over and over again and readers won’t notice. In fact, trying not to use these words can actually draw more attention than just using them!
For example, referring to Hyrule as “the Traveler.” Is it relevant, in the context of what I am writing, that Hyrule travels a lot? Or am I just trying to avoid using his name too much? If the answer is the latter, either don’t bother or change your sentence structure to remove the name entirely. If you have a solid action word, the name will disappear in favor of the action.
Using ‘Traveler’ in this context draws attention away from whatever Hyrule’s doing to what he is. That may not be the best thing to draw attention to. If what you are writing is a story about Hyrule finally getting a safe place of his own to call a home, you could use it for contrast. In which case, save it. Use it once, so it has impact. But if I'm writing about Hyrule teasing Legend, referring to him in that way can disrupt the flow of the story. It draws attention away from Hyrule's personality and his interaction with Legend to his background.
The point is to do it deliberately! It’s okay to use names and pronouns a lot. ‘Traveller’ is a title. Titles stand out.
3. Description slows things down.
Anywhere you want to linger or draw attention is where your descriptions should be going.
The middle of a fast paced action scene where your character is concentrating on the fight might not be the best spot to go into deep detail about the surroundings or what the enemy looks like. Convey those details in bursts that are worked into the action: “Time nearly rolls his ankle on the rocky ground.” Be very sparing. What makes an action scene interesting is how the character feels about what’s happening. You only need enough information on what the surroundings look like for a reader to follow along, and you can probably do most of that setup in a brief paragraph before the actual action starts.
On the other hand, if your character takes a shocking injury in said fight and you really want to dwell on that moment? Or if they’ve got a really cool, flashy move that they unleash in one single exciting burst of fighting prowess? That’s the spot to let your inner poet shine. Slow those spots down and let the reader really enjoy what you’re doing by using your detailed descriptions there.
This applies to all action, not just fighting. Walking through a busy marketplace? Action. A conversation? Can be approached as action. The best spots to use lots of description will be the spots you want to linger on: the first glimpse of a long-lost friend through the crowd, that last hug as they say goodbye.
Description slows things down. Use it accordingly.
Most everything else I can think of is less to do with flow and structure and more to do with other aspects of writing, so I'll stop here.
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lemonhobgoblin · 4 years ago
Text
A Casual Night
Mothman x human reader (gender-neutral)
Word Count: 7k
(I remember saying I would have a fic done the same week I posted my other fic. Well, that was a lie. After dealing with work, creating new wips, and editing what started as a 2k fic became this long-ass post. I tried to keep this gender-neutral, but if there are any parts thats not gender-neutral, or if something doesn't make sense give me a message and I'll fix it. Anyway hope you enjoy!)
The faint sound of your car running and the sound of the wind whipping against the surface was muddled out by old tunes playing from a random radio station filling the lonely ride home. Your eyes trained on the dark empty road ahead, your headlights on full beam, lighting your way. The subtle notes of a box of cooling pizza wafting in your direction every so often.
You were driving from a city over from where you lived, coming back from a friend’s home who was having a small get-together. It was a great time, unwinding from the stresses of work and life in general, with games, movies, playful banter, and sharing a couple of drinks. As the night progressed, things began to slow down, one of your friends passed out on the couch while everyone else turned to some lighthearted conversation. Leading the host to pipe up if they were willing to spend the night given how late it has gotten and mostly due to how much some people drank.
While everyone was willing to stay the night and continue their night of merriment. You on the other hand as well as one other person had to leave for the night due to work obligations you both had tomorrow morning.
Regretfully, you made your exit not without being offered leftovers for the ride back. But halfway home, you received an email detailing how you were not needed for work tomorrow as you were getting gas.
With this newfound information, you had the choice of making a U-turn back or continue straight home.
Rather than driving back to your friend's home, you were just going to continue your way home. You already said goodnight to them, and you were almost home even though it was still quite a ways to go. Nevertheless, they probably turned in for the night by now, and there was always next time to make it up to them.
So driving down an empty two-way road, with no lights fixture to light the road. With no other cars passing through, keeping you company. Only the trees crowding around the road giving you some sort of haunting looming audience. This was a normally busy road; however, by how late in the night it was, it was understandably dead.
Fortunately, enough, you saw your first signs of life up ahead. It seemed to be a herd of deer passing by. You honked your horn to scare them away from the oncoming danger that was your car.
Except instead of dispersing, they stayed in place, it didn’t seem out of the ordinary why else did they have the saying 'a deer in headlights.'
But what was odd, was the closer you approached the herd of deer they seemed to be floating off the pavement, apparently, they were one entity and not a group and had a pair of red glowing eyes. It stirred an unpleasant feeling in the pit of your stomach.
Promptly, an undiscernible screech erupted all around, jolting you in your seat, feeling a pang of sudden fear washing over you. Convincing yourself it was only the radio going off the fritz, peeling your eyes away from the road you scrambled to shut off the device. During your haste to bring an end to the blaring otherworldly sound, you didn’t realize how fast you were driving.
"What the fuck?!" Seeing a flash of a large dark mass smashing against your windshield - shards of glass flying around and onto you.
Swerving your car over to the side of the road, feeling the right side slope down, the bumps of the grass making you rattle and jostle in your seat. Putting your car to a complete stop.
Frantically, you scrambled to free yourself from your seatbelts, ripping yourself from your constraints, you busted out your car. Not giving a single care to the state of your car or your frazzled state. Only concerned about what or who you hit.
Jogging down, you saw a crumpled figure on the ground, he was a good distance away from where you parked. "Oh my god," You exclaimed.
“I didn’t see you coming, I’m so sorry," you yelled, hurrying to aid the individual. You didn’t get a response or see any movement - he did hit your car pretty hard.
Scared for their wellbeing you slowed down and fished for your phone in your back pocket to call for help. But before you could dial for help, you saw something that put halt to your actions. You starred in disbelief as your phone locked out.
From the figure, a wing stretched out toward the sky before folding back in itself.
What the hell did you hit?!
Cautiously, you crept forward to get a better look, you could see he was wearing a fur jacket. No. He was furry everywhere, dull in color but with an interesting print on what you believed was the wings, the pattern was similar to a moth's wing. A costume perhaps? His legs were a digitigrade structure and his feet are similar to a bird's foot arrangement. The talons of which were scraping against the road like an animal in pain.
"A moth?" Perplexed at what exactly you were looking at, it still seemed human, but it was too large in stature given it curled up on the ground. This had to be some large person in a very convincing costume. Assuming it was someone dressed up, as what you could only think of as Mothman. A random tall person dressed head to toe in an extremely convincing Mothman in the middle of an isolated road, for reasons you couldn't conjure but there had to be a rational reason as to why.
The closer you approached, the more of your rationality began to slip. Carefully you squat down, putting your hands on its back, it felt real. Too real.
The wings felt warm, stroking your hand down, you felt the ridges, bumps, and what felt like a pulse, in the wings. You noticed it had a plush ruff around its neck that could’ve been mistaken for a scarf. And there were antennas on its head, it was featherlike and twitched every few seconds. You had no desire to investigate further, yet you had a gnawing sense of curiosity that compelled you.
Besides what if was someone who was severely injured and needed immediate help. And what kind of person would you be if you just drove off without a second thought, leaving them to die. You couldn't live with yourself if that was the case.
This is too unreal. But all the signs suggested otherwise.
Bracing yourself, you gently turned him over to face you, the moment you caught a glimpse of his face, you felt instant regret surge through your veins. You stumbled backward, landing on your back, trying to push yourself away from the massive creature with your legs.
"MOTHMAN!!" You screamed.
This in turn alarmed the cryptid, flapping his wings erratically in response to your sudden outcry. It was emitting these indiscernible sounds that you had heard earlier in the car, it provoked that familiar immense fear within you.
Except, this was louder than when you were in your car, the sound reverberated through you, chills traveling up your spine. You could feel your heart palpitating within your chest, your trembling limbs growing numb. You felt your senses heightened at an alarming rate it was nauseating that you felt your mind blur. If these disquieting sounds alone could trigger your flight or fight response, without the presence of the monster. It was nothing in comparison to the full show that was in front of you, it was overwhelming in all the senses, inciting you to get far as possible.
"Holy shit!" Pulling yourself from your state of shock, you turned over onto your hands and knees, pushing yourself up and away, making a straight beeline to your car without delay.
The screeching stopped behind you. Glancing back toward the monster curious if it was making a move towards you. But all you saw was a poor incapacitated being, pitifully attempting to lift itself away. One of its wings was flapping while the other was barely moving at all. When it tried to move its stiff wing, it wouldn't fully extend before retracting it back, making what sounded like a pained low screech.
In all honesty, even in your fear-driven state, it pained you to witness this distressing scene. Pondering back and forth between taking the car and leaving, or taking your chances with the monster.
Inching toward the car, all without removing your eyes from the scene. Then you heard a more distressing shrill, stopping you dead in your tracks. You couldn't leave him.
He still needs help.
Inhaling a deep breath, you shakily walked back, each step was challenging you felt so weak in the knees and you felt lighter than usual. Your mouth desiccated of any moisture but persisted in swallowing nothing. It felt as if you were walking down to your execution and it might as well be. You couldn't predict what it would do or what it was capable of doing if you got any closer. Regardless, you tried to push your fears aside and help him, even if it killed you.
"Hold on, I'm not gonna hurt you. Just don’t hurt me please." Easing yourself onto your knees, mindful of not doing any sudden movements to provoke it any further for both of your sakes.
Bringing a hand back to where you had it before, you delicately brushed your hand up and down in small strokes on its wing. Focusing on his state and not his appearance, you saw cuts and scrapes littering its wings and body.
You grazed over an open wound, causing the creature to flinch, silently apologizing to him in a hushed tone before continuing to pet him while avoiding any more wounds.
Its breathing began to slow, quelling its jitters. You took this as an indicator of the creature growing at ease at your presence. “See I just wanna help." You whispered as the Moth creature peered up, gazing into your eyes in a sort of mutual understanding. Ensuring a feeling of reprieve within you and within him, or so you thought. It was soon to be proven wrong. The moment was short-lived when the cryptid began to thrash around again, this time trying to keep you away from him.
"Wait I thought we had an understanding there." Pulling yourself into a ball to avoid the cryptid's violent flapping wing and arms recklessly whipping around. "The eye contact we had! The eye contact!" you screamed after being betrayed by this false sense of amicable trust you thought you both had shared at that moment. But this ineffectively did nothing to fix the dilemma, merely adding more to the chaos.
"Please I want to help you." Reaching your hand out to calm him once more, without the screaming and flailing this time. "This was my fault, I wanna help and then you can go on your Mothman way, okay?" You tried to coax. Once more the monster began to quiet down, its quick shallow breathing slowed. Weary of his soothed behavior, you waited a bit before wrapping his arm over your neck.
"Okay, I'm gonna pick you up or at least try to." You said, guiding him upward into a standing position.
"Christ, you’re heavy!" Bending under the weight, propping him against your frame, so you could get a proper footing and grip on him. You struggled to the car, trudging over, but not without one of your legs giving out from under the weight occasionally. What caught your eye was how his head lulled forward or side to side, he might be disoriented from the blow. Not wanting to move his head much, you trudged much slower than you already were and stopped every few seconds.
Arriving at you your vehicle, you rested against your car, before opening the car door and easing him inside into the backseat. Tucking in any stray limbs and wings fully inside the car. Shutting the door you looked at the heavily cracked windshield. It was damaged pretty well, you summarized that you had to slowly drive all the way home. Wait home.
"Wait, I can't just bring you to my house." You said, bringing a hand to your mouth, realizing a new issue. "Someone's gonna see you." Remembering you lived on a busy street near pubs and shops, and it was Friday night you could only assume there were still people out and about enjoying the nightlife. Peering inside your car, your eyes locked on your jacket in the front seat.
"Maybe I can disguise you, and it is Friday night maybe people would be too drunk to notice."
"As long as we don't draw too much attention." You said, getting into your seat and starting up the engine. But something about saying those words aloud, felt like it was going to bite you in the ass but what’s the worst that can happen, you had him handled.
….
Here you were driving back home with the low-volume melody playing like before. However, this was different, before you were alone and you welcomed the tranquil ambiance you had riding home. But now you were riding back with an elusive creature. Creating an unsettling silence within the vehicle. What was maddening was that you were unsure what he was thinking, making you unsure of what to do besides drive. Maybe you were overthinking this but you felt you had to do something to break this disorienting atmosphere because this was too hard to fathom as reality.
"D-Do you want gum? L-Leftover pizza?" Your voice cracked, quickly clearing your throat asking again in a stronger confident voice.
No response. You tapped your fingers on the steering wheel, sucking in your cheek prompting you to purse your lips in your endeavor of finding what else to say. Flitting your eyes back and forth from the road to looking around your car on what else to offer.
"My coat?"
No response again.
Looking at your rearview mirror to get a glimpse of the cryptid only to be met with its red eyes staring directly back at you. Hastily looking back to the road and sinking into your seat, alarmed. How long was he staring at you? Why was he staring? At least he seemed less disoriented now, but you didn’t need that right now, maybe you could draw his attention onto something else other than you.
"How about some air?" you asked, hoping he would stare out the window or put his head out, anything but him staring at you all the way home. Gliding your left hand over to the window control panel on the side of your door, you pushed down a button making his window rolled down. This captured his attention, redirecting his gaze towards the open window, watching the trees and road signs passing by. O thank god. but just as he turned his head to the outside, he took this as an invitation to spread his wings to catch some air.
"That doesn't mean you can start flapping, put your wings down." Whipping your head back and forth from the creature to the road, drawing a hand at him, swinging it around to get him to fold his wings down. "PUT YOUR WINGS DOWN! PUT YOUR WINGS DOWN!" Veering your car off to the side of the road.
.....
Back on the road, after sorting out the matter. "Okay, no rolled down windows." You remarked. Mothman looking like a perfect angel in the back tapping at the rolled-up window while you were in the front with your hair messed up and arms lightly scratched. You weren't a mother, but you now had a vague idea of what it would be like and further respect and admiration for them.
Needless to say, you rode the entire way back in silence without a single word being uttered.
…..
Steering your car on the side of the street in front of an apartment complex, you placed your car in park. You turned off the engine. Street lamps and other building lights were illuminating the street. The neon signs from the local business started to shut off, looked like some of them are turning in for the night.
You snatched your jacket from the passenger seat before slipping out and making your way to open Mothman’s car door.
"We need to move, quickly." Throwing your coat over him to conceal him in the event of someone walking by. Mothman pawed at the coat and clutching it closer to get a better look and smell of the material. After gathering your phone and keys, you whirled back toward Mothman. Fussing at him to not move the jacket, readjusting it over his head. You surveyed the streets for anyone coming down or seem like they are heading out in your direction.
Once more putting his arm around you, you strode as quickly as you possibly could to the complex without either of you falling over. Mercifully, you got to the door with no problem at all or bumping into anyone.
Until you heard something you’ve been dreading on the way home, something that made your heart sank down into the deep trenches of your stomach
"Holy shit! Is that Mothman!?!" A male voice exclaimed.
You whirled your head toward the stranger who was slowly approaching you two. Fuck!
Where did he come from and what made him so confident that he’s looking at Mothman. You glanced back over to Mothman noticing that the jacket that was covering his face, was now draped over his shoulders. Drastically you scoured your brain for an excuse or some sort of explanation to counter how this wasn't a cryptid. But he beat you to the punch before you had a chance to find a solid response.
"Dude sick costume!" He said excitedly.
O fuck. Relieved that it wasn't the worse, but you were surprised he didn't question any further especially how close he was to you both. Even you would've questioned, the details and just the overall realism of said 'costume'. It didn't take long for the answer to hit you square in the nose. When a waft of alcohol invaded your nostrils, the man was drunk, and you never were more grateful.
"Thanks." You nervously laughed.
"That’s crazy good man, you did this all yourself?” He asked enthusiastically towards Mothman, beholding every bit of intricacy on the creature.
"He can’t talk right now; he drank too much to function." You interjected. “We just got back from a party.”
"I gotcha, but is it okay if I get a photo though?"
FUCK! you blurted internally, but externally with faux delight, you said "Sure!"
" 'Chad' you cool with that?" you sheepishly asked your moth friend with the first name you could think of for him. And why were you asking him? As if he could make a cohesive verbal response. But you were hoping at this moment he could magically talk, alas all he did was blankly stare.
"I'm not hearing a no." You heard the man say and you woefully agreed.
"Gimme a sec." The man pulled out his phone and tapping it unlocked.
"Okay," your heart was racing in your chest and you could feel a layer of sweat beginning to form and pool in places. But by some sweet grace of some higher being, a miracle happened right before your eyes. You heard a melodious chime sweetly ring through the crisp early fall air.
"O dang getting a call, hold on" the man answered the call, turning his back towards you.
Maybe there was a god, after all, a fucking sadist with a sick sense of humor. Either way, you were not about to pass up this chance for a free getaway.
You took this God-given opportunity to jam your key into the lock swiftly to get the both of you inside. Twisting to unlock the entrance, you could overhear the man to what sounded like him wrapping up his conservation. Turning the knob, you ushered Mothman and yourself inside the apartment complex, but not without throwing a quick apology to the stranger. Slamming your back against the door shutting it closed, a wave of relief washed over you.
"Aw man, that was too close." leaning your head against the door, desperate for a quick breath from your ordeal. You hadn't felt this much adrenaline since, since. You were so winded you couldn't even recall a memory.
Peeling yourself off from the door, feeling ready to make the final steps home. Deceptively though your body wasn’t as ready to move just yet.
"Nope wait." still trying to catch your breath. Doubling over, leaning forward, and resting your hands on your knees. Mothman all the while just tilted his head at you, confused. While you were over there feeling like you were going to be sick. The wave of nausea quickly fading away allowing you to straighten yourself out.
"Okay, we're good." You said as you grabbed his hand leading him up the stairs. Unbeknownst to you, the large creature was zoning in at the unfamiliar contact.
During his entire time with you, he was just as wary of you as you were with him. He wasn’t one to present himself to people, only as a forewarning of what was to come or an indication that Mothman will be the very last thing they would see. He trailed and stalked others like you in your car but was never hit, that was a first for him. Albeit though, him getting hit with your car, leaving him cut up and bruised did give him another reason to be extremely defensive and antsy around you.
Yet, you were gentle, loud but gentle with him when he wasn’t. Risking your safety in an effort for him to get mended. Lightly ghosting his thumb over the soft skin of your hand, tightening his hold on you. But you didn't notice, you were too preoccupied with climbing higher up the stairs, vigilant for any neighbors.
"Come on we're almost to my place." Giving a reassuring hand squeeze.
"Try to stay quiet a little longer." Peering back at the cryptid flashing him a quick warm smile, before looking back straight ahead. The creature looked directly at you, then to stairs, and back to you again. He came up with a grand idea to help with your effort. But first, he had to gain your attention and for this to work, he had to disregard everything you told him not to do earlier. The cryptid started to emit his screech directly at you to get your attention. And to you, he was making a ruckus, that was echoing through the entire stairwell and halls.
"What part of stay quiet do you not understand?" Grimacing at the noise. You stopped your movement, aiming to cover his mouth with your free hand, you felt his mandibles tickling underneath your palm.
The creature pulled your hand away and into his own, clutching both of his hands close to himself, bringing you into him. This gesture was unexpected and left you feeling warm in the face by how close he was pressing you into him. But it didn't last long when he began to bend his knee and flap his wing readying himself to fly up.
"Wait don't" Pushing yourself away from him, you freed yourself from his grasp to stop his actions. He was still injured this would only cause more harm to him and to you if he tried doing what you thought he was about to do. In your effort to stop him, Mothman tried to reach out for you again, only for his wing to smack into you causing you to land on the hard edge of the concrete stairs; headfirst. “Shit."
Groaning, "Well, I deserved that." you brought your hand to your head, you winced at the touch. As you yanked your hand away you caught a glimpse of red in your peripherals. Bringing the hand in your line of vision you saw blood smeared on the tips of your fingers.
Mothman immediately brought his actions to a halt when he saw what he had done to you. His antennas drooped down, he came close, giving you a hand up. Gladly accepting the gesture, he brought you up to an upright position, he felt bad for what he had done to you. Tentatively, he brought a hand up, lightly swiping his claws over your forehead making a low pained screech.
“It’s okay, you just wanted help didn’t you.” He nodded in response, you pressed a hand to the wound preventing the blood from dripping down. You couldn’t be mad at him he didn’t know better, and you did hurt him first, it only felt fair. Disrupting this tender moment, you heard yelling and heavy footsteps approaching one of the doors on the floor you were on.
"Let’s go!" you rushed up the stairs, luckily for you both it was the final flight of stairs. Reaching the top of steps in record time when you heard the front swing door open.
"What's with all that commotion!?" A neighbor yelled upward toward the sound of your feet stomping up. Coming to an abrupt halt at your door, you whispered for Mothman to stay where he was, while you dealt with the matter below. But he decided to follow behind instead, not wanting to leave your side.
"Sorry I was just goofing" You admitted, showing your face over the rail, outing yourself to your neighbor.
"Sorry my ass, I got work early tomorrow, you expect me to sleep with this fucking racket outside, and now this." They argued back, and rightly so, who wouldn’t complain about an unearthly ear-piercing screech penetrating through the halls along with banging sounds hitting all around the walls. But you couldn’t help but feel annoyed
"I’m sorry, it won’t happen again, promise." You leaned forward resting against the rail while one leg was kicked up behind you, preventing Mothman from coming toward the railing. You exchanged a few more words with your neighbor to avoid the landlord getting involved. Finishing up, you pulled yourself away calling it wraps on the conversation as the individual below continued spewing profanities at you and about the building.
You unlocked and opened your door “In! In! In!" You shoved the imposing cryptid inside, already getting peeved by the neighbor's continuous rambling. It wasn’t anything new they hated everyone in the building, but it wasn’t something you grew used to though.
"Jesus Christ finally." you sighed, kicking the door behind shut.
Slipping off your shoes, leaving them by the entrance, your feet ached in relief from its constructing confines. Dragging yourself through the small hall leading the way to the main part of your home, it was small but cozy.
"Here we are home sweet home." you chimed, leading Mothman further into the living room, grabbing the jacket from him and tossing it to the couch. As well as turning on a lamp to properly illuminate the room. It didn't take long for Mothman to be drawn to the light fixture like the moth he was. He grabbed the lamp hugging it towards him, looking directly at the bulb. Chuckling at the sight, you could’ve given him a flashlight on the way home if he was going to be this mesmerized. You proceeded to make your way to the kitchen for your first aid kit.
"You can make yourself comfortable, but don’t wreck anything please," you shouted from the room over, but Mothman was unbothered, he was solely transfixed on the soft light, eyes wide and grabbing at the lampshade. "I'm gonna go find my first aid kit to fix you and my cut." You really hoped nothing else gets broken, there was already enough screaming and thrashing for the night.
Shuffling through the kitchen, trying to remember where you last placed the kit. You rested and slid a hand over the cool smooth linoleum counter, looking between cabinets for any sign of a small box. Coming to the last cabinet, you rummaged through before finally pulling out your first aid kit.
But you couldn’t help but stop and think about tonight’s events. It started as a fun night, then filled with pure dread, mothering, and now what felt like taking care of a drunk long-time friend. Except, what really dominated your mind was this odd feeling you started to feel, you recounted back in the hall the way he held you close. It made you feel bashful, to say the least. Up to now, you saw him as a friendly harmless dare you say, an unexpected friend. But that didn’t accurately describe what you were feeling. Shaking your heading, you had other pressing matters to attend to.
"Got it, let's see." And not to your surprise you saw the tall cryptid sitting on the couch, clutching the lamp close to him as if it was his lifeline. You contemplated whether you should take the lamp away. But he looked to be enjoying the light source, hearing faint happy chirps emitting from him. Sadly, you decided to ruin his fun, seeing as there were wounds you needed to tend to on his chest and you needed the light to properly see them.
You attempted to pull the lamp away so you could have better access to examine his injuries. In response, he chittered in objection to his lamp being taken, and nothing was going to separate him from his precious lamp. He was going to soon learn that the lamp was barely holding onto the outlet. Hugging it closer to himself, the plug came out, extinguishing the light. Perplexed as to where his light disappeared to, he presented the lamp towards you hoping you would bring the light back.
“I’ll bring it back, but only until I get a look at you.” He nodded vigorously as you grabbed the lamp and setting back on the mini table, blindingly trying to find the plug and inserting back into the outlet turning on the lamp again. You sat on the couch next to him, motioning for him to come closer so you could get to work.
......
"I don’t see any major cuts or anything broken." Scouting out the state of the injuries, they were honestly not that bad, you guessed it was probably due to the now dried flaky blood around his cuts gave the appearance that they worse than what they were. He got pretty lucky but it was probably due to his build that he was capable of taking on more than a couple of hits.
"Only just a sprain and a couple of cuts, that’s a relief" Thinking to yourself glad it wasn't any worse, you couldn't imagine the stress of trying to keep him at your apartment while he heals, and away from your neighbors’ eyes. The fear of him getting caught and taken away and dissected. Being bombarded by officials and Mothman lovers. And getting questioned or probed, maybe even both. You didn’t know if they would, but you knew deep in your heart they would probe you for answers. Stopping your paranoid-filled train of thought from delving any further. You finished tying up a couple of loose ends and sticking on on salve on minor areas.
"See all better. Don’t move too much, it'll heal quickly that way" Gathering any trash to throw away. Everything is fine now; you don’t have plans tomorrow so you could probably sneak him back out the next night.
Huh.
Letting him go. The idea of it should have given you some relief and yet you couldn’t help but feel conflicted. Would he come to visit again? No that would be reckless. Or you could convince him to stay longer to heal, no that would be irresponsible and selfish of you. He deserves to go back, and you're going to help him get back on his feet and let him be on his way. You walked back to the room.
“Feel much better?” you inquired to Mothman who busy was playing with the bandages on him.
He looked directly at you and nodded in response.
"That’s good, the sooner you get better the sooner you can leave," you told him, seating yourself back next to Mothman who hasn’t kept his eyes off of you. You peered up to catch a glimpse of what he was doing, only to capture him looking directly at you with his head tilted.
Not this again. you thought.
He’s certainly not making this any easier. You looked away trying to focus on anything else in the room before you resorted to looking at the floor.
"You know it’s still kinda crazy, that this is even real. Like I feel like I’m going insane," you jokingly confessed to Mothman, laughing to yourself. But you thought about it more, maybe you were, "O my God is this what a psychological break is?" You looked back at him, having an unfazed look on him.
"Can I?" you asked reaching a hand forward. He stared at your hand for a bit, until he leaned forward giving you permission to proceed.
"So soft" allowing yourself to fully feel him, combing your hand through his dark fur and traveling up his ruff. It was surprisingly plush for how it looked, it felt you were touching a cloud but with some tiny debris within it. You gathered more courage to let your hand wander up to his face, giving a couple of brushes before stopping your motion, cupping the side face. His eyes were a brilliant red color comparable to a lustrous gem.
"You really are real." You muttered, stroking a thumb over his cheek.
Mothman brought a clawed hand to your face in a likewise manner, curious of your own features. Where for him he found them peculiar and to other individuals such as yourself they found it normal. The universe was messed up, making it much harder for you to separate yourself from him when the time comes for him to leave, but you allowed this, forgetting your initial plan.
Feeling a sharp claw gliding up against your skin, perfectly capable of nicking you or doing so much worse to you than you could imagine. But he had no intention to do so, merely entranced by you.
His hand wandered up to your forehead, where your gash was, flaky and dried the blood was chipping at the edges. His antennas lowered and chirped in response, for what he did to you back at the stairwell, he didn't mean to. Even if you said it was alright, it still didn’t make him better, bringing a hand to skim the wound, you flinched at the sharp pain of your forgotten injury, knocking you out of your trance-like state.
Mothman drawing back in his seat, alert and worried thinking he hurt you again.
“It’s okay, you did nothing wrong.”
You reached a hand out to calm him, you aimed for his arm but managed to miss and land your hand on his thigh. Wow, that’s great! you internally cringed feeling a blush rush over you, instead of pulling back you still tried to alleviate him by patting his leg, telling him it was the injury that was hurting you not him.
Instead of defusing his concerned mindset, he only tried to push away from you to avoid causing you any further harm. Hand still anchored on his thigh, you launched yourself trying to stop him from hurting himself more.
Fortunately, with your luck, you ended up top of him, Mothman laying on the couch while you hovered over him, with both of your legs planted on either side of his thigh. Your left knee was alarming close to his crotch if you moved an inch closer you would be bumping your knee right into it. Your hands rested squarely on his chest, finger splayed out as you looked down at him with a similar wide-eyed expression.
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
Maintaining your effort of trying to console Mothman, you coughed to clear your throat and your mind of any dirty thoughts from springing up. “Hey, I know you didn’t mean to, and if you did, I would tell you and- and I’m sorry that I gave you the impression that you hurt me and I’m sorry for hitting you with my car, I feel like saying it doesn’t do justice for what I did.” You panted after your long-winded speech.
“Also, I’m sorry for tackling you down that wasn’t my intention. So, you good? I didn’t hurt you?”
He slowly shook his head, as a response that you didn’t hurt him. Startled yes. Hurt no. Bobbing your head in understanding, you carefully crawled off him.
"Well, I guess I should go get the blood washed off, I'll be right back." You informed the still cryptid who made no effort of getting up, just continued to lay on the couch staring straight ahead in shock.
Walking off to clean off the blood and to regain your composure. You were just going through too many emotions than you should for the night. On your way to take care of your problem, you could’ve sworn you heard something akin to a cat purring where Mothman was. But you blew it off and justified it as hearing the blood rushing and the beat of your heart pounding in your ears.
Striding down a hall and into the bathroom you turned the faucet on allowing the water to flow into the sink and onto your hands. Water pooled in your cupped hands before splashing the cold water onto your face, the water, and dried blood dripping together down around the curves and grooves of your face into the porcelain bowl below. It was a satisfying contrast to your heated face, splashing another round of water at your face but an intrusive memory replayed the moment that happened a few seconds ago. Leaving your face buried in your hands, groaning from sheer embarrassment. Fucking hell why am I like this?!
Unwillingly you slid your hands off and look at yourself in the mirror you looked like the accurate personification of a hot mess. You weren’t going to think too much into this, you are going to pretend what happened didn’t happen, you were going to disinfect and stick a bandage on your cut and not dwell on your emotions around the situation at hand. Allowing him to leave as soon as he is better and not have any other affiliations with him again.
Opening the medicine cabinet for an alcohol wipe and unwrapping the wipe from its small packaging.
"Now for the worst part." Quietly hissing at the contact with the antiseptic. Finishing up on cleaning the wound, you foraged through the cabinet looking for a bandaid. Noting there wasn’t one to be found, you sighed.
Guess I need to go find one.
Turning toward the door to walk out, you looked up and saw Mothman standing at the doorway, watching.
How long was he standing? And how the hell is he so silent for such a big guy and why wasn't he like this before? You were about to question him what he was doing here or if needed something when you noticed he was fiddling with a band-aid in hand. Slowly he brought it up, placing it over your cut.
"Thanks." Laying a hand over the band-aid, feeling not just your cheeks warming up but now a butterfly feeling in your stomach, solidifying your emotions for him.
So much for my plan.
Weaseling past him, before enthusiastically asking him, "Well, we got time to pass, so what do you want to do?"
…..
The sun rays bled through the curtains lightening up your home, the light seeping past your eyelashes and into your eyelids forcing you to wake up. Blinded by the light, you groaned in discomfort, pushing yourself up hearing a couple pops in your back. Rubbing a hand up and down your face trying to wipe away the sleep.
What the hell happened here? Why was there glass everywhere? Looking up you saw your window smashed in with only a few jagged pieces in place around the sides. Turning your attention away you looked around the room, wasn’t there someone else here. O yeah.
But the question was, how did you end up falling asleep on the floor, and where was the large cryptid. Wait a minute.
"No, you can't go out, you're still hurt." Trying to hold him back from going through the window. Everything was fine, you both were sitting on the couch, watching whatever, and snacking on fruit, and next, you found yourself asleep but woke up to a ruckus, the tv still on, and seeing Mothman trying to rip the curtain off the window nearby. Jumping to action to stop him, he successfully pulled off the curtains along with the rack, you assumed he was trying to leave even though he wasn’t better or so you thought.
And here you were struggling to hold him back, you thought he was difficult before but now that he fully adjusted and patched, you fully experienced that he was pure indomitable power.
"At least wait till the street is clear." You insisted, noticing some people walking or jogging down the street in the dark early morning. But he didn't listen he was adamant in making his exit. So, you made the decision to let him go.
"Okay, okay at least let me get the window, I don’t want glass on the floor." Racing in front of him to slide the window open. A quick gust of wind whipped against your face, causing you to squint your eyes in response.
"There! AH-!" the last thing you saw was Mothman coming at you and the last thing you felt was his frame bulldozing you down by fast approaching torso.
"O right." That explains how you ended up on the floor and the glass strewn all over the floor. More incredibly, even when you opened the window, the creature still managed to break the window in its haste to leave. Your head was pounding, he really is a force to be reckoned with. Bringing a hand to your head, you winced at the contact to your forehead but noticed something else. Delicately raising a hand back to your forehead and skimming along the surface. There was the band-aid from the stairwell and on the other side was another. You didn’t remember adding when did you?
Oh.
……
"My window," you muttered groggily, your vision fading out not before the moth creature gave his assistance to you for the last time and a thanks to you by sticking a band-aid on your sure-to-be bruised noggin as you lulled into an unconscious state.
……
At least bug boy was nice enough to get you another band-aid when he put you out cold, before making his exit. Slowly standing up to get started on assessing the mess and knowing full well that you needed to inform your landlord of the window. You peered out the window, curious of any indication of Mothman to spot, unfortunately, all there was to see the was hustle and bustle of the city around and below.
Turning your attention back to the mess, maybe you could make a fib of some large man drunk man pretending to be Mothman breaking into your home believing it was his. Sighing, you went to grab a broom to clean up the mess, at least you were able to encounter a real living and breathing legend. Made you wonder if other cryptids exist, but you’re pretty sure handling one creature was enough for now after last night.
Finishing up, you gathered all the shards and brought them to the trash. You didn’t have work for today, which gave you the opportunity to get a breather and get things done. Making your way to your room and getting ready for the day.
As you were getting clothes on and getting a good look at yourself in the mirror. There square above your eyes and your right eye was a bruise evident from last night's escapades. Shaking your head, laughing to yourself you weren’t going to be able to cover up the contusion. Bringing a hand to your head, you couldn’t help but smile at the cryptids' cute gesture. Walking out of the restroom deciding to let the shiner shine, ready to do some damage control.
Grabbing your keys, and heading out the door, and yet you couldn't stop thinking of that little moth guy. What are the chances of seeing him again? Probably unlikely, a mere once in a lifetime chance but you were grateful to encounter a sweet bug boy like him.
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studythenight-away · 5 years ago
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Hello! As finals season (aka 5-research-papers-due-in-a-week season) dawns on many of you, I thought I would share the process I used to write papers in college. This made writing long research papers much less daunting (but can also work on shorter papers). I really hope this helps some of you who feel stuck. Especially during these ridiculous times, when you're stuck at home and might have other uncontrollable factors affecting your mental health, a clear framework of what to do could be helpful. Good luck, my friends! You got this.
About me
I graduated college in 2018 with degrees in Political Science + International Studies and will be starting law school this fall. I wrote nearly 20 15 to 25-page papers, never earning below an A. I loved researching about my topics but hated writing. It's tedious, takes so much time, and everything I write sounds bad at first. Plus, I was a terrible procrastinator so most of these essays were written in under a week. Talk about stress.
Over time I found a process that worked for me, one that made churning out a paper seem straightforward, like going through a factory line rather than this terrifying concept of writing 10,000 words. It kept me sane without decreasing the quality of my work (or more importantly, how much I learned!) 
I'm thinking about making a short video to show this in action… let me know if that could be helpful!
Step 1: Research
How you organize your research is a key step in keeping you sane. Usually I'll have a pile of 20 books in my dorm along with dozens of JSTOR tabs open on my laptop, and that can get overwhelming very fast. Right now just focus on collecting ideas, not developing an argument or even an outline! As with most research papers, you could be starting with little to no background information on the topic, so it is still too early to be thinking about an argument.
Put all your research in one document
Open up a new doc: this will be the heart of everything. For a 15-page paper I usually end up with around 14-18 pages of typed research, 10 pt font, single spaced, tiny margins. This seems like a lot, but essentially all I do is type up anything I read that seems relevant to my topic, so luckily this step does not require that much brain power. Just type type type!
Use the table of contents
Find the chapter(s) that are actually relevant instead of skimming through the whole book. Time is of the essence here!
Use Zotero, cite right away
You can also use easybib or whatever you're used to, but keep track of your sources. I like Zotero because I can keep a log of all of my sources and copy the footnote or bibliography version whenever needed. Before you even begin reading, cite the source and copy it into your research doc. This will save you so much time later when you have to put in your citations in the actual paper. 
Here is an example of what my research doc looks like:
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Full citation is my heading for each source just so it’s crystal clear
I ignore all typos (I don’t think there are any in this part though, go me!) because my head is buried in the book just trying to get all the info down
I always start with the page number so I know what to cite when I go back
Create a shorthand 
While typing up research, you might think of something that the author didn't talk about that you'll want to write in your paper. Or perhaps a few sentences already start to form. Put them all in one place, with your research, so you know what source you'll have to cite to then lead into your idea. I type "!@#" before anything that is strictly my own idea so I'm never confused. It's fast and stands out.
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This is an example: the two bullet points above are evidence from my source, which made me think of this argument I could make, which I noted with “!@#”
Step 2: Read Your Research
Now that you have all your information, go back and read through it all. Every time you read about a new theme/person/event, write it down somewhere. You may come up with a list of 20+ different ideas in your research. No matter how small, as long as there is something about it, write it down. Each of these mini themes is going to end up being a paragraph in your paper or combined with another mini theme. 
Once you’ve made your list, look for larger overarching themes. In the paper I’ve shown you, I had mini categories like “political party x” “religion” “labor groups” “little organization” and “hierarchy.” When I looked back I though, hey these are all groups and how groups are working together, so they each became their own mini paragraph under the subsection of “Alliances.”
As with most research paper structures, I try to find three general themes/subsections (like an extended version of that 5-paragraph essay we wrote in middle school). It makes the paper less messy and also makes sure I’m not covering things that are beyond a reasonable scope.
During this step, you are also searching for your thesis. It won’t be your final version. As you fill in your outline in the next step you may make slight changes. But this is definitely when you start thinking about it.
Step 3: Outline
We’re ready to outline! Once I’ve collected all my different themes and organized all my subsections and paragraphs, it’s time to fill in that outline. I start a new doc just for the outline and take advantage of google doc’s headings function to make a clear document outline.
Here comes the fun part, I read through my research one more time, this time copy and pasting all my research into each section of the outline. The document outline in google docs makes this easy because I can just click on each subheading to get me there (super helpful when you’re dealing with 15+ pages of research).
Here is what it looks like:
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Let’s say I need to add something to my outline about labor groups. Boom, labor groups. Also, the typos are really abound here haha
Step 4: Write the Paper
Okay, I get it, easier said than done. BUT! You already have everything set up. Your outline is essentially just a list of your paragraphs and all you have to do is paraphrase, cite, and create a topic sentence. And that’s how you should think about this: you’re essentially transforming bullet points into sentences and adding footnotes. 
In high school my English teacher introduced us to Sh*tty First Drafts for creative writing, but honestly the same applies to research papers. Sometimes I’ll even have phrases like “wait no that’s not what I meant but basically...” and when I go back to edit, I realize that what came after “but basically...” is fine! And I keep it. So just start typing.
How do you cite while you write? Because we’re trying to get a constant stream of writing going, inserting proper footnotes after each sentence you type is too bothersome. I usually split screen with my outline and my paper so I just copy and paste a few words from my bullet point into my footnote, like so:
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(This is from a different paper about cluster munitions.)
Step 5: Edit the Paper
I work best when I print out my first draft and make all edits in red pen. I feel more productive and can visually see where I want to move sentences and what I need to change. The more red there is the better I can feel the paper getting. (Whether or not that’s true doesn’t matter. We’re trying to stay motivated here!) When it’s all digital I don’t really see the progress. Plus, once I finish all the red, I get another moment of passive brain work, where all I’m doing is transferring edits rather than thinking. And at this point in the process, that kind of relief is much welcomed. 
The good thing about this process is there’s not usually a need to cut entire paragraphs or pages because the paper you end up with is just a formalized version of your outline. Because you started with such a detailed outline, the cutting and editing now is just to refine your word choices and get rid of the “but basically”s. You’re almost there!
Step 6: Replace your citations
Now it’s time to go back and replace your footnotes with actual citations. Zotero makes this easy because in Word you can just insert and add the page number, and it’ll automatically do “Ibid.” for you when needed. Ctrl+f in the original research doc to quickly find the source.
Step 7: One More Read-Through and Submit!
Congratulations!! You’ve got a fully-researched and well-backed paper! Of course, even though the process is straightforward, it’s still a lot of work. In ideal situations I would start researching two weeks before the deadline, but if need be, I believe I’ve done this all in three miserable panic-filled days as well. 
Please message me if you have any questions at all! I really hope some of you find this helpful! Good luck!
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madswonders · 4 years ago
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A Lesson In Romance #10: Thoughts
Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader
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Genre: Hurt/Comfort
Warnings: Implied anxiety, Mentions of canon-typical violence
Word Count: 2.5k
Plot: Reader keeps getting caught in rom-com situations with Spencer Reid. This time, they're paired together on a case.
A/N: I know that the BAU's conference room has big-ass glass windows but just imagine that the blinds are closed for the entirety of this chapter aha. Also this chapter is a doozy... like 1k words longer than usual, so enjoy!
Masterlist | All chapters here!
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As Peter Gizzi once described the phenomena of love, "About you there is nothing I wouldn’t want to know / With you nothing is simple yet nothing is simpler."
In high school, your reputation always preceded you. The cynic that never had a boyfriend, much less a drunken one-night stand; a prude who waited over ten dates to have her first kiss; or the "ice queen" who kept her emotions locked up and threw away the key.
If they saw you now, you wondered if they would laugh at how you've changed; because these days, you looked like you were keeping the best secret in the world, one that threatened to burst from your lips every time you smiled.
What you didn’t know, is that you didn't need to be a profiler to see it. From the bubbling laughter and whispered conversations, to the not-so-secret longing glances. You and Spencer disappeared into your own world when you were together, and everybody knew it.
And for the first few weeks, that was enough. You found it easier than usual to ignore the thoughts that lurked in the back of your mind. That is, until you couldn't.
"... I want you and Spencer to work on the geographic profile." Hotch had announced, and you remembered the feeling of your blood running cold.
There were two reasons for this. First was the fact that this case linked twenty homicides across three years to a single unsub. If there was any case that required the two nerdiest members of the BAU to team up, this was it.
Unfortunately, that fact was closely followed by an overwhelming fear — and you wanted to preface this by saying that you were usually a woman of logic and science — but, somehow, you couldn't shake the thought that something bad was going to happen to you and Spencer, and you weren't ready for it.
Leaning against the cool conference room wall, you tapped your toes in an impatient rhythm against the carpeted floor. You were trying to recite what you learned from your PhD; that your mind was jumping to conclusions and that it was normal to be nervous. It was normal to feel this way. You were normal.
"Are you okay?" Spencer asked, jolting you out of your mantra.
You realised your boyfriend had been talking to you for awhile now, but clearly, you weren't listening. You shook your head apologetically.
"Sorry, I was just thinking. Could you say that again?"
"I was just saying, you can start by pinning the names and locations of the victims, and I'll put up the crime scene photos... but are you sure you're okay?" He asked again, this time shooting you those puppy dog eyes that made you weak.
"Y-yeah, I'm fine. Let's get to work." You said firmly, grabbing the box of push pins. You felt his gaze linger on you for a second, before he began picking up his own stack of pictures.
The first hour sped by quickly as you and Spencer listed out all of the unsub’s possible motives and next victims. At the half hour mark, Hotch dropped in to check on your progress, bringing takeaway coffee and leaving with a rare smile.
At the second hour, the rest of the team returned with some new leads, and unfortunately, new bodies, but nothing that helped solidify the profile any further than what you already had.
At the fifth hour, there was no denying it. The team had hit a wall. While the rest of them were back in the field investigating more leads, you sipped on your second cup of coffee while staring at the evidence board. Spencer paced the room behind you.
"The messy dump sites. The carvings onto the victims' chests. One points to the unsub being disorganised and inexperienced, but the other is a clear, almost narcissistic ritual." The doctor thought aloud.
"Usually that means the unsub is trying to make a statement, but he killed his first ten victims before the police found out, then killed another seven and three right under their noses before going dormant. If he wanted to make a statement, why wouldn't he tip off the police or media sooner?" He grumbled.
"Are we sure it's not a taunt to the local police’s competency? Many of his first victims were found in secluded areas with limited police support." You pointed out, tapping the edge of your cup in thought.
"No, the victimology and locations are too wide spread. A taunt would present a clearer message." He said.
You turned around suddenly, causing him to halt in his steps. "Here's something completely off the wall — but what if the unsub was trying to achieve a specific pattern with his kills?" You said, gesturing with your cup.
Tap, tap-tap, tap, you created the rhythm with your finger.
"That would explain why he isn't acting like a narcissist. Maybe he's suffering a mental condition that compels him to complete a certain pattern, and subsequently, ritual with his kills. Could be rhythmical, musical, numerical..." You explained.
"Numerical. That's it!" Spencer squeaked, rushing to the board with a marker. "I thought these numbers seemed familiar earlier, that's because they make up prime numbers!"
He backed away from the board to reveal what he wrote. The numbers 2, 3, 5, 7, and 11. A lightbulb turned on in your head.
"2, 3 and 5 make up the first ten kills. 7 is the next, which he managed to complete perfectly, but something happened to the unsub at 11." Spencer voiced your thoughts.
"He might have been incarcerated, or injured. But we can't rule out the possibility that he might have moved out of town and resumed the pattern elsewhere. So either we can expect 8 more victims here, or the unsub has already moved onto the next number: 13." You quickly finished the train of thought.
"Love, you're a genius!" Spencer rushed over to pick you up by the waist, twirling you as you laughed in relief. But the relief turned to surprise when he kissed you deeply.
God, he was good at this. Even when your feet touched the ground, it felt like you were seeing stars. Though it was only when your lips parted that he had the decency to blush.
"Love?" You breathed.
Spencer's cheeks turned crimson in embarrassment, but he didn't back away. Instead, he leaned forward, bumping your foreheads together gently.
"I didn't know you had that in you, doctor." You teased.
"Well, my mother did school me in classic romance literature from a young age. Not to mention, I happen to be a genius at most things..." You could hear the smile in his voice, and you giggled.
The doctor pulled away then, an adoring smile still plastered across his face. "Are you fee—" He began, but his voice died in his throat as his gaze fixated on something behind you.
"Ooooh, am I interrupting something?" You turned around to see none other than Penelope smiling coyly from the doorway, and the two of you jumped apart.
"N-no, nothing!" Spencer blurted out.
"All fine and dandy here." You added on, blushing furiously.
The tech analyst smiled deviously. "Well, I thought I'd come and check on my two favourite lovebirds. Anything else from the case for me to chew on? Except whatever that was earlier." She teased.
"Actually, there is." You cleared your throat awkwardly, while the good doctor looked like he wanted to melt into the carpet.
"We need you to search up murders in neighbouring cities that match the mutilation by our unsub, then cross-reference the time frame with any new residents. We suspect he might be trying to complete a pattern, and that he may have done it somewhere other than here." You said.
"On it, future-Mrs-Genius. I will get back to you so fast that you won't even have time to get down and dirty." She half-yelled that last bit, heels clicking as she walked back to her office. Before you could even formulate a response, she was gone.
You felt your boyfriend wrap his arms around you from the back. "Now, where were we?" He whispered.
You giggled, leaning back into the doctor's chest while he rocked your bodies side to side. "Are you feeling better now?" He asked.
"Next time someone says it's not as intense in here as it is out there, I'm going to give them a stern talking to." You joked.
"You know what I mean, love." Spencer reiterated gently, the pet name falling from his lips like it was the most natural thing in the world. "If you tell me about it, I can help you. You know I'm always here for you."
You sighed softly, blinking back tears that threatened to spill.
"It's something stupid. I-I'm fine."
He turned you around, brows furrowing in concern when a tear rolled down your cheek. "What's wrong?" He asked, wiping it away tenderly.
"I— I was worried about us working together." You admitted. "And it's not because I don't like working with you, but I just— I just couldn't—"
"Take a deep breath, love. Slowly." He held your shoulders as you breathed in and out, once, twice.
"I've been afraid this whole day — no, for awhile now — that something was going to happen to our relationship." You confessed shakily. "And it's not about our jobs — although I worry about that too — but I'm scared that one day you'll wake up and realise that I'm not worth the trouble."
You looked up at the ceiling, trying to stop the next wave of tears.
"A-and it's only gotten worse because I've never been so h-happy with another person before. Only you've made me feel this way, and I'm t-terrified that I'll lose what we have."
There was a brief silence as Spencer pulled you close to his chest, one hand stroking your hair carefully. You could hear his heart beating fast.
"Do you remember when the team tricked us into sharing a bed?" He whispered, a hint of a smile trickling into his voice. "I think about it every single time we're about to go into the field. Because you said you'd never leave me, and now, whenever we're out there, I know I'm not alone."
He breathed in deeply, your head gently rising and falling together with his chest.
"You've given me someone to come home to, love. What we have, you'll never lose it, okay?" He whispered.
"Baby, I—" Your voice halted. Crap.
"Wait. Baby?" Spencer repeated back to you, a teasing lilt in his voice. Your face flushed, and you unwinded your arms from your boyfriend to cover your face.
"Oh god, can we pretend that didn't just happen?"
"I have an eidetic memory." He pointed out. You let out a watery laugh, knowing when you had lost.
"Alright, alright. But I do have another ide—"
Then, the conference room phone rang. It was Emily. "Hey guys, Garcia managed to narrow down the unsub and we're 10 out, but we'll need some back-up."
"Be there in 15." You replied, while Spencer shot you an amused look, Luckily, he waited for the call to end before saying the next words.
"Let's go, baby." He wiggled his eyebrows.
You rolled your eyes and laughed, already strapping on your kevlar. "That's it. You're not driving."
"Aww!"
---------
After the major breakthrough in the case — all thanks to Nerd 1 and Nerd 2, as Derek fondly called the two of you — the case managed to wrap up neatly and the BAU found themselves in a rare position. Ready to end the work day, on time.
Not that anybody was packing up to leave just yet, although you wished they would, because Penelope had decided to start enthusiastically retelling how she found the BAU's resident lovebirds in the conference room, unable to keep their hands off each other.
"Last I heard, pet names aren't a crime — and how long were you standing there anyway?" You accused, blushing.
"Firstly, they are. Criminally cute, that is!" Penelope squealed, while the rest were in fits of laughter. "And secondly, you should never underestimate my awesome ninja abilities, because I heard everything that I needed to hear."
"Do I even want to know?" Spencers winced.
"I don't think you do, pretty boy." Derek laughed, clapping the genius on the back.
"Wait, wait, wait. Can we go back to how Spencer's pet name of choice is love?" Emily gasped in laughter.
"You've got to admit it's kind of cute, Emily." JJ smiled.
"Sure. If you're courting Mr. Darcy and attending cotillions."
"C'mon, Prentiss. All that means is that our boy's got style." Derek added to laughter, while Spencer whined in protest.
The door to Hotch's office opened suddenly, both him and Rossi stepping out with expressions of urgency on their faces.
“Sorry to break up the fun, kiddos. But there's been an update to the case.” Rossi announced, following right behind Hotch to the conference room.
The laughs were wiped off everybody's faces as you traded concerned looks. As you filed into the room, Hotch had already begun speaking.
“Another body was found half an hour ago. Same MO, same random victimology, and same kind of dumpsite. And the unsub just told us where to find his copycat.”
“Wait, we never profiled a second unsub.” Derek interjected.
"It doesn't makes sense — the first unsub is a control freak. He didn't like the idea of anybody messing with his sequence. Wouldn't he have done something if he knew somebody else was copying his pattern?" You asked.
"We profiled that he wouldn't be able to deviate from his pattern. What if he had to continue, even when somebody else was committing some of the crimes for him?" Spencer countered.
“Hold on, you said the unsub gave us a location?” Emily asked.
"And a time." Rossi voiced up. “8pm tonight at The Basil. The first unsub claims that's where the copycat finds his next targets."
"How do we know if we can trust him?" Derek asked.
"We don't. But he didn't display any telltale signs of doubt when he told us, and this is the only lead we have." Hotch's frown deepened. You had a feeling he didn't like the idea of this either, but the team didn't have a choice.
"Okay, if we're doing this, he can't know we're onto him," Emily thought aloud, "and we'll need precautions in case it's a trap. That means..."
"Undercover agents... and the bait." Hotch said with finality.
“And who did you have in mind for that?” You piped up, and everyone turned their eyes to you.
“You and Reid.” He stated the obvious.
“B-b-but, I’ve never gone—"
“You’ve more than proven your abilities in the field since you joined us, and having natural chemistry will make it less suspicious to the unsub.”
You opened your mouth, but no words fell from it. Hotch was right. Of course he was right.
As if hearing your thoughts, Spencer took your hand in his and squeezed, and you felt a little calmer already. “Ok, I’ll do it.” You said determinedly, while the doctor echoed your sentiment.
Hotch nodded, beginning to assign roles to the rest of the team while you squeezed your boyfriend's hand tighter, a new mantra forming in your head.
Everything is going to be okay. Everything will be okay.
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Tag List:
@blue-space-porgs @nobutalsoyes @lady-loves-a-lot @queen-flower @agentcarterisgay @totalmess191 @sapphic-prentiss @oops-all-ajs @spottedzebrasinpartyhats @mellowalieneggsknight @kenny-0909 || @averyhotchner @amesandpineapples @willowrose99
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iwadori · 4 years ago
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Dates with the Haikyu boys (Kuroo,Iwaizumi)
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hiii emp! so I saw that your request is open soo can I request fluff+31 w/ iwaizumi and kuroo from prompt list that you reblogged, thank youu emp♥️💞✨(and also can I request Godzilla stuffed animal on iwa scenario? since he love it sm :-D) srry if i ask too much:“ - @bucinhajime
Word Count: 1.4k
Genre: fluff
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Kuroo:
You and Kuroo had the cliche enemies to lovers story
Knowing eachother from when you were kids you always wanted to compete with one another
Even when you fell in love
And hey, what’s wrong with a little romantic competition?
Today was your weekly date, which for this week Kuroo got to pick (as last week you picked go karting.) You arrive at the arcade, ‘this is going to be fun’ you think to yourself. The arcade is a huge staple in your relationship, as you’ve been going there since you were kids even with Kenma sometimes, with you and Kuroo always battling it out on each different game on who will win and whoever accumalates the most single wins on games on that day win the overall win for the day. You’re winning 56-55 right now and want to keep your lead.
You see your boyfriend standing at the front of the arcade scrolling through his phone, you whistle at him (like your a catcaller) “hey hot stuff” you say jokingly and he rolls his eyes in mock annoyance “ready to get your shit handed to ya tetsu?”
“I think not, I’m definitely taking the W here Y/N” he declares “Just wait and see”
He was wrong, so very wrong. You were basically on your A-game tonight slamming him in every game you play he hasn’t won at all tonight, you try to let him win some on purpose but he spots your tactic and forfeits wanting to ‘only play you at your best babe.’ 
You take a break to get some food after playing basically every game in the arcade twice over and Tetsu still hasn’t gotten a win. As you are eating you catch him staring at you,
“What’s wrong?” You ask with a soft smile on your face “If it’s the amount of losses you have it doesn’t matter everyone has off days so it-”
“I just really really love you” he says breathlessly
His random declaration of love renders you speechless, you do of course love Tetsu and everything about him but especially moments like these when he’s just unapologetically transparent.
“And I love you too babe” you say “and I always will no matter how shit you are at pacman” you get a laugh from him as he playfully punches you in the arm.
As you are about to leave the building, Kuroo’s eyes stumble across a claw machine one that must be new (since you’ve used every piece of machinery in this place.) Before you can stop him, he rushes over to it slotting in *insert currency in here* 
“you know these games are rigged right?” you say humoured by your boyfriends concetration
“Don’t worry babe, I’m definitely getting you something” he says sticking his tounge out slightly in focus “choose a teddy bear”
“well I think you should go with the obvious choice” you say
It’s been 30 minutes now and you are TIRED at first it was cute seeing your boyfriends dedication but your feet ache and you’re ready to go home. You cautiously approach your boyfriend not trying to break his focus “Tetsu, don’t you think it’s time we-”
“I’m not leaving this booth, until I win that stupid stuffed animal you want…” he says 
“But what abo-”
“and no I don’t care how much money it takes” he finishes
You go sit back down still humoured by your boyfriend, telling yourself that if he doesn’t finish in 5 minutes you’re dragging him home with or without that ‘stupid teddy.’
5 minutes has now passed and before you could get to your boyfriend, Kuroo comes running towards you with a dishevelled looking black cat teddy in his hands, just the one you wanted.
“Aww you did it Tetsu” you exclaim kissing him on the cheek
“I told you I would” he responds smugly
You finally left the arcade, now back in your own apartment ready to go to bed with you black cat teddy (which you obviously just had to call Tetsu) in your hand.
Before sleeping, you decide to text Kuroo one more thing
Y/N: Btw it is now 57-55 take the L babess <3 
Kuroo: shushhhhh I’ll win the next one
You fall asleep dreaming of plans to top todays perfect date.
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Iwaizumi
You and Iwaizumi had recently met through mutual friends and have been talking for a while and are now going on your first date.
You decided to make it at the amusement park nearby 
But to your luck, the date couldn’t get any worse then it already did.
The problems started, when you went on your first ride and as you are just a thrill seeker and a tad bit over excited when going on a really fast part you throw your hands up in the air definitely not expecting Iwaizumi’s face to be there. Luckily for you, it was the end of the ride so you can quickly tend to the immediate nose bleed you gave him from you powerful hit. 
You were distraught to say the lease you didn’t meant to hurt him at all, but he assured you that he was okay and accidents happen all was forgiven and forgotten. 
After getting his bleeding to stop, you both agree upon sitting down and possibly getting some food before progressing onwards. Conversation between you both flowed easily making you thankful that things didn’t get awkward after your accident. 
But you spoke to soon, as when reached for a napkin you knocked his drink making it spill all over his crotch freezing you in place. ‘Not again’ you think as you quickly grab the napkins that you were initially aiming for to clean the drink up…before you realise where you spilled the drink making you drop the napkin and revert back to your seat. Before you could apologise again Iwaizumi hushed you making sure you knew he wasn’t mad or anything.
All was kind of forgotten (not fully since Iwaizumi still got odd stares from some people as it did look like he wet himself) but he didn’t seem to care, easing you’re worries.
The rest of the date did seem to go fine, you too both enjoying the rest of the rides and having no hiccups or injuries at all whilst having fun. However when Iwaizumi went to the toilet, you still did want to make it up to Iwaizumi so before you part ways you spotted a booth that sold stuff animals and you were determined to win one for him.
It was a simple, hit three bottles win a small prize hit six botlles win a medium prize and hit all nine bottles and win and ultimate big prize and you’re definitely winning the big one you think.
It was harder then you thought, you only had 9 balls to throw so you had to get a perfect shot each time and you just couldn’t seem to do it. The booth owner asks you if you want to take a break on your 20th go but you respond with “i’m not leaving this booth until I win this stupid stuff animal that he wants and I don’t care how much money it takes” 
Shocked from your sudden outburst it seems the booth owner let you win out of fear, which didn’t bother you at all since all you wanted was the big ultimate godzilla prize to hand to your new boyfriend after completely fucking up the date. As you’re being handed your gianourmas toy you turn and see Iwaizumi fresh from the toilet staring at you in confusion.
You hand him the stuffed animal shyly which he gladly accepts, secretly blushing at the kind gesture and at your good memory in remembering that Godzilla was his favourite thing of all time. 
At the end of the date he kisses you softly and tells him to call him Hajime instead of Iwaizumi to which you gladly do. You go on many more dates after this and you do injure yourself and him more but that’s one of the many things Hajime ends up loving about you. 
AN: I definitely need sleep, I hope you enjoy this since pure fluff is definitely not my thing at all but i enjoyed writing Kuroo’s scenario since Iwaizumi’s to me felt a little off ( espeically since i realised I used NO DIALOUGE ) but that’s what happens when you’re running low on sleep kids ://
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deltas-writing-corner · 4 years ago
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Tsukumo Yuki relationship headcanons
Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen
Pairing: Tsukumo Yuki x reader
Author note: Tsukomo Yuki is the reason I love woman and she can crush me between her thighs send tweet
Warnings: Potential manga spoilers (?) | Mentions of s*x, but nothing too blatantly explicit. I would still prefer it if minors did not interact with this post in any way.
Yuki always asks the people she meets what type of woman they like. If someone were to ask that same question back to her, she’ll most certainly utter back your name as if it were an obvious response.
What’s not to love about you? You’re cute. You make her laugh. You cook for her because heaven knows she can't if her life depended on it. Most importantly, you keep her company due to the lack of curses she’s ever sent to exorcise. Traveling the world is fun and all, but it’s even more fun with you by her side!
You’re not a sorcerer. You can’t even see curses. Yuki is a childhood friend of yours and has kept you in the loop regarding the world of jujutsu sorcery since she started integrating into it. She thinks it’s important for you to know that someone like you, a non-curse user who has no control over the curse energy you create, should know what exactly your negative emotions can lead to. It’s not to make you feel bad or pin blame on you in any way. It’s her way of protecting you beyond physical means as well as a way of showing you that she places a great deal of trust in you regarding the nature of her line of work and her true goals.
Because she rejects the methods of the higher-ups and her ideology is more along the lines of putting an end to the creation of curses permanently instead of letting them manifest and dealing with them when they start causing profound trouble, you’re often the one that has to listen to all her new, sometimes overreaching, hypotheses now and then. You may even take part in her research, but she would never put you in any sort of harm! At least, not unless you give her the okay to. Be warned, if you give your blessing to be her little lab rat she’s prone to get carried away with her methods. Speak up if she’s doing something outrageous or if she’s making you uncomfortable. Otherwise, you might end up in some precarious situations.
As mentioned previously, Yuki isn’t sent out on missions that often, if ever. She instead chooses to travel in and out of the country, for the sake of her research as well as for the pleasure of it. Since she’s one of three, later four, special grade sorcerers her salary is rather tremendous. Unfortunately, her travels outside Japan are “unauthorized” and sometimes her funds get frozen by the higher-ups. Her quick solution to the matter is to fly back, take on a mission or two to get her funds unfrozen (and into your account because you’re her partner-in-crime) or even take on a mission to earn some more funds, and then you and her are right back to traveling the world again.
During one of these money replenishing heists, she met a kid that she took a particular interest in and wanted to mentor, Aoi Todo. It’s hard for most people to spark her interest to the extent Todo did, so you happily supported her endeavors and even met with her young pupil a few times throughout the years. Her methods of training are a bit....extreme, to put it lightly. You understand that holding back her punches will only hinder Todo’s progress instead of allowing him the ability to improve and push past his limits, but you can’t help but flinch over the large scar that marks his face whenever you briefly meet up with him.
Todo is eccentric, but so is Yuki. Perhaps not idol obsessed like Todo, but seeing the way he takes great care of his appearance and flaunts his body (during a battle even), he’s a near-identical clone of Yuki. She knows that she’s good-looking, and she will always flaunt this fact to anyone with working eyes, even you! Does it work every single time? Yes. Yes, it does.
Honestly, how can it not? She’s tall. She has a great butt. She drives a motorcycle. Her tight biker pants are your Achilles heels and she knows it. Sometimes she’ll wear them around the house just to flaunt her curves and other bodily goods, even if it’s the middle of the summer, the AC is broken and the pants are made of stuffy leather material. If it gets your face all heated up, she'll wear it.
The compliments she gets from strangers are nice and all, but it’s your reactions she truly cares about. You’ve been by her side through it all. You're still sticking with her even despite the fact that she’s constantly moving around and living a somewhat free-spirited lifestyle. You genuinely support and help her when almost everyone else has rejected her methods and ideals and brush her off as some lazy, outrageous-thinking woman. Really, you stole this woman’s heart just by letting her be herself, a lazy, outrageous-thinking woman.
Yuki is indeed lazy, to the point it sometimes affects you and your shared apartment is left in a week-long accumulated mess. I’m talking clothes strewed about and spilling out the already full laundry basket, sink filled with dirty dishes, houseplant half dead due to insufficient watering, and little dusty bunnies in the corner of the room. Whenever you try to get around to getting your living space in order, she always drags you back to the bed with her either to nap some more or for a quick round of sex that leads to more napping. Eventually, you have to beat her with a pillow and threaten her with no sex for a certain period of time to get her to back off, which always works without fail.
If you really hold the “no sex until...” ultimatum over her head long enough, she’ll even pitch in and help you clean. But to be honest she kinda sucks at it so it’s sometimes better to just have her sit on the sidelines while you do all the work. She’ll jokingly suggest you clean with just an apron on (because she’s a freak like that), but you haven’t taken her up on the suggestion just yet. It’s mostly because you’ll use the “naked apron” method to further insinuate her punishment if your usual threat begins to lose its potency (because you are also a freak like that).
She’s a bad sleeping partner. Not only does she hog all the blankets and pillows, but she even stretches out her limbs over the entire bed. This usually leaves you curled up in a corner shivering your ass off until you either fall asleep via exhaustion or move to the couch. If you go to the couch, she’s 99.9% likely to wake up and join you shortly after, where she’s less of a hassle to deal with because of the limited space.
She’s a great big spoon, which is actually one of the ways you later use to solve her troublesome habits as once she latches onto you, she will not let go the rest of the evening. Unfortunately, she also snores terribly loud, but it’s nothing earbuds can’t fix.
Some might think she sleeps in something flattering, maybe even a bit scanty. That couldn’t be any further from the truth. Her pj’s are decades-old shirts and gym shorts that she never got around to getting rid of. If not that, she’ll sleep completely naked and she doesn’t care if someone walks in on her with the covers off. She’ll only ever wear lingerie or other promiscuous pieces of clothing if she has intentions of getting between your legs and rocking your world for the rest of the night.
I think it goes without saying that she looks great in lace, but as hot as she may look, she really likes seeing you dressed up in something risque as well.
If you’re female, she sometimes likes to wear matching lingerie sets with you, but her favorite material to see you in is leather, especially those harness-styled sets that squeeze your flesh all around.
If you’re male, she’s a complete sucker for a man in a clean-cut, custom-tailored suit and will take it off as soon as you put it on. Hope you don’t mind losing a button or two, because she will pop them off for sure when she rips your dress shirt off of you.
To all my gender-neutral folks, It’s never too late to whip out that naked apron I mentioned earlier! Or a leather jacket. Everyone looks great in a leather jacket!
Yuki’s diet is fucking terrible. You’re a decent cook, but despite this, all she ever seems to want is greasy take-out food that makes you wonder how the hell she’s still so fit after witnessing her down three chicken burritos in one sitting. Even when the two of you are abroad and are able to try out different types of cuisines not so readily available in Japan, she’ll still want to go out to a fast food joint that you can easily find everywhere. You’ve tried to get her to branch out of her comfort zone and eat somewhat healthier alternatives of her favorite foods, but so far you’ve gotten mixed results.
In summary: Yuki is a pretty outgoing person and sometimes can be a bit of a hassle to deal with, but she’s clearly ambitious and moves to the tune of her own beat. Her goal of finding and effectively eliminating the source of all curses is a testament to the fact that she wants to save future generations from having to carry the burden sorcerers have been carrying for thousands of years. Her goals are not only for the sake of the people who will come after her, but also for the sake of her future with you. You’re someone she genuinely cares for and wishes to spend the rest of her life with, evident by the numerous times she’s come clean to you about her fears of you dying when she isn't around to protect you or of her dying and leaving you behind to mourn during late-night pillow talks in hotels or in your shared home. A future where you and her can travel the world and truly take in and enjoy the sights and wonders instead of searching for an answer to one of the world’s greatest phenomenon is a future worth fighting for, even if she’s met with some pushback or the end goal seems like nothing more than a pipedream at times. So long as you’re there with her to see her research bear fruit, she’ll keep testing and coming up with new methods to eliminate curses permanently, no matter the extremes her research takes her to.
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kanene-yaaay · 4 years ago
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Go to Sleep
Kanene’s note: Gosh, having a schedule is weird. I just wanna post everything I already wrote and ramble non stop about it asdfgtyujkigfdo. XD
Well, this was suppose to be a drabble, but it’s very long so sdftyujikgfred. I hope you like it!
Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:
* This characters don’t belongs to me! They all belong to Thomas Sanders from the serie Sanders Sides.
* This is a SFW tickle fanfic. If you don’t appreciate this kind of content, please, look for another blog. There are a plenty of fabulous arts in this site!! ^w^)b
* This is Lee!Virgil with Ler!Roman. Around 1.500 words.
* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any and every advice is very very welcome! \(-w-)/
* Listen a bit to the birds today. Changing the way you think is not a bad thing. Drink water, sleep, eat and love!
[~*~]
Roman growled, missing by a few inches the button of his thunderous, infuriating alarm before finally hitting it. Staring and blinking lazily at the numbers his brain struggled to discern and recognize, only to confirm it was really time to wake up and start the day. He grabbed his pillow and squeezed it with all the strength he could muster, rolling from one side to other on the mattress, trying to wake up his body as quick as his mind and almost falling from the bed a reasonable number of times during the process.
 He got up, yawing, stretching and humming as the first lyrics of the day stuck on his head, hand rubbing at his eyes as he followed the kitchen’s direction with slow steps and tired sways on the beat of the song.
 Two dark, wide eyes stared right back at him, their owner completely frozen on the spot with his hand inside the cabinet, probably already holding some sort of a snack. Roman also stopped mid-step, gears running inside his mind, gaze locked on the other, his brow progressively furrowing.
“Virgil,” he began, voice slightly hoarse “What the heckty heck are you doing up? It’s barely seven in the morning!” Virgil only stared back, slowly closing the cabinet’s door, as if afraid the movement would startle the other. Roman proceeded to get some eggs and other cold ingredients from the refrigerator for the breakfast, his words growing more awake and vivid as they spilled with no filter or whatsoever from his lips. “You got an early shift again or something? Those are absolutely hellish. A bunch of people exhausted, tired and glaring at you as if you are the holder of all their problems and their solutions can only be achieved by being insufferable pieces of- Urg. I can’t believe they would give you one right after you got the night one. Damn, I didn’t even see you arriving here yesterday!”
 He turned his attention back at the other, looking for a kind of frustration in the place of the still startled, wide gaze which continued to be directed at him. Virgil nodded slowly, stepping away and putting some physical distance between him and the confusion on Roman’s features.
 Then, between the strings of sleepiness that clouded his brain, it clicked.
 Suddenly more details on the other’s behavior started to become clearer: the way Virgil’s hair was messier than his usual ““style”” (Roman scoffed mentally, thinking that if he rolled his eyes any harder they would never come back to his normal place again), his wary, yes, but way too much slow movements, the way he seemed to be unable to stop blinking at every millisecond and, above it all, the final piece of the puzzle.
 Virgil wasn’t wearing his pajamas.
 “YOU DIDN’T!” Roman gasped, as if Virgil’s life choices were a personal attack. “YOU DIDN’T GET ANY SLEEP LAST NIGHT!!” A turn of heels and he was again fixating his glare on the other, his free hand accusingly pointing in his direction, receiving an annoyed hiss as immediate answer.
 “Shut up!” Virgil snarled, practically growling back at him. “It’s fucking seven am don’t be so freaking loud.”
 “Don’t change the subject! Why didn’t you go to sleep?”
 The one being questioned just snorted, half amused. “Bold of you to assume I’d ever sleep in my whole life.”
 “That is it.” Virgil didn’t even have the time to wonder the meaning of his friend’s sentence before the aforementioned picked him up, resulting to a not very contained shriek escaping from his lips and his hands not much gracefully – or gently, although since they were keen on just jumping on each other out of nowhere to play fight Princey would be fine - meeting his friend’s face.
 “Roman! What the he-”
 “Did you just SLAP me? My beautiful face?! Before my own beautiful eyes??” Virgil Storm always got, even if he would never admit this out loud, surprised with Roman’s capacity of doing a series of offended incoherent noises which evolved to words before being carefully metamorphosed in weird noises all over again, and in the end still managing to form comprehensible sentences. His surprise did nothing to quell the grumpy snark immediately flying from lips, though.
 “And I’m going to do it again if you don’t let me go in this exact instant.”
 “You go and try to help and that is the acknowledgement you get,” The one wearing pajamas with little crows printed on it huffed, mumbling in a lower tone as he noticed the sharp gaze being thrown in his direction. “fucking unbelievable.”
 “I still can hear you, Princey. You’re literally carrying me.”
 “I sTiLL cAn HeAr yOu-OW! Ow! Ow!” The sentence was interrupted when the sleep deprived one punched Roman’s shoulder. “You’re insufferable, you know that?”
 “Let me fucking gAAH!” In a way his wish was granted, one could say as they watched his protest being cut as Storm was impolitely tossed on his bed, Roman quickly following his friend on the mattress, arms hugging him from behind, and physically preventing him from escaping his current soft predicament. “Prince, you’re dead.”
 “Shhh, no talking. We’re sleeping.”
 “We are not. You are being a pain in ass and I am about to defenestrate you.” Despite his fervent protests, his sharp, flaming glare began to lose its heat, his body not doing any actual effort to free himself from the other’s – strong, good - grip, muscles starting to relax against the great warmth involving him in a comfortable and secure blanket.
 “Sure, sure, mister Grumpy Pants, you can do that when you wake up.” He tightened a bit his hold around Virgil, yet being the most careful as possible, actively ignoring the annoyed hiss his friend gave him. His hoodie was really fluffy at the touch, slightly remembering his stuffed animals he frequently hugged to sleep.
 For a moment, everything was pleasantly quiet. The one with smudged makeup, since he hadn’t time to get it off before being trapped by his roommate and best friend, felt the tiredness becoming sleepiness as the seconds went by.
 …That was until an electric sensation shot across his spine, leading him to almost jump in the same place 
 “S-stop nuzzling me!”
 “Hm? Oh sorry.” Virgil pressed his lips tightly closed, preventing the wobbly giggles to escape as Roman speaks, not realizing how close his mouth was from the base of his neck, every breath sending tickly shocks across every nerve. “You’re just too much sooooft.”
 Roman opened an eye when realized that no snark remark from the other followed his words, the figure in his arms shaking too much to be asleep. A frown painted his feature as he readjusted the position of his hands, trying to get a bit more of balance to look at Virgil’s face when suddenly a high-pitched yelp escaped, cutting the air and immediately catching their attention.
 “Did you just squeal?” He questioned as his glare assumed a playful shine seeing a blush spread on his now frozen friend.
 “It was NOT a squeal! It was a yelp.” Virgil’s words came so fast that they almost tripped on themselves. Roman snorted, a smile taking over his face. “Get off me!” and, in the moment the one wearing a hoodie tried to pry his hand from the spot on his right side where it was resting, the pieces finally clicked in the right place and his smile quickly submerged, giving space to a smirk.
 ‘No WAY Doctor Doom and Gloom is ticklish!’
 However, the red lover only blinked as the true personification of innocence and naiveness, his hand firm in its place, fingers starting to slowly move, light pokes being delivered on the sensitive skin. “But why that, Knight Mare? It’s cold and all I could ever want is just to hug my bestest friend!”
 “You already hugged me, now go aWAY!” His voice trembled in the last second, the exact moment his thumb experimentally scratched the spot right under the lowest ribs, leading a surprised squeak to leave Virgil’s mouth.
 They both stared at each other, gleaming, filling their wide eyes.
 “No.” Virgil said, trying to squirm away but finding himself stuck between Prince and the wall. Roman didn’t even attempt to hide his smug grin, anymore. This was going to be so much fun
 “Don’t you dare! Don’t you freaking dare!!” His friend only laid down again, now carefully, yet firmly, pulling him one more time against his chest, growling playfully. Years and years fighting for the Tickle Monster title on his family, battles and battles against Remus only sharpening his skills, which showed by the way his fingers seemed to find every single weak spot on Virgil’s skin, wiggles, scribbles, pokes and scratching exploring everywhere. “No! Nononono! You fucker, you moron, you bitch, you-” A few chuckles cut his curses as he one wearing pajamas squeezed his side a couple of times, the tip of his fingers also teasing his ticklish stomach. “Roman!!”
 “No, no, my so dear, so ticklish, friend. Roman is no longer here, this is…” He paused for a dramatic effect, basically beaming at the giggly giggles and wiggly wiggles from the other. He shoved his face on his neck, the next words vibrating almost as bad as the spidering on his ribs. “The Tickle Monster!!”
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the-bau-quinjet · 3 years ago
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A Song For You
Steve Rogers x Singer!Reader
Summary: Snippets of Steve and Reader's life together as she sings a song she wrote for him.
Warnings: mention of car accident, parents dying, mostly just fluff though
Word Count: 6413
a/n: this is a mess, but I'm happy with it. It's basically a series of blurbs that are not in chronological order so I could follow the song. It's inspired by Like My Father by Jax. :) Sorry if it's confusing, hopefully it all makes sense at the end
Masterlist
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Steve had been gone for months on a mission. It wasn’t often his missions lasted that long, so of course one of the few times it happened Y/N needed to tell him something important.
She shook off the annoyance as she got ready for Tony’s gala. He wanted to celebrate the successful mission as soon as Steve and Bucky came home. Of course, everyone tried to reason with him that waiting would be better so that the two super soldiers wouldn’t be exhausted, but Tony refused to listen to logic.
“Nonsense. We’re having the party as soon as they arrive.” He stated matter-of-factly before turning to Y/N. “And you, my dear, are going to sing.”
“Tony, maybe you could at least pretend to phrase it as a question?” Pepper scolded, eyeing the woman in question apologetically.
“Sorry. Will you sing at my party?” He grinned, knowing Y/N would say yes since Tony probably already told everyone she would be performing.
“Tony, you’re a menace.” She eyed him before nodding.
“I am, and you’re wonderful!” He exclaimed. “I happen to know you’ve been working on a new song. Care to sing it for Steve at the party?” He grinned.
“I don’t know how you know about that song, but fine. I think he would like it. Avengers only though! I’ll sing something else for all the guests.”
She rolled her eyes at the memory as she finished getting ready. Luckily she was ready early because Tony came running into the room in a panic.
“He’s here!” Tony’s smile widened as he thought about the nights events. “Let’s go!” He practically pulled her from the room, far too eager to share news that wasn’t his.
Tony had Y/N set up on stage right in time for Bucky and Steve to arrive. She sat behind a piano, ready and waiting for Tony’s cue.
As the guests of honor entered the main ballroom, Tony stepped up to the microphone. Steve stared at Y/N with questioning eyes while ignoring Tony’s speech. She smiled lightly, shaking her head at Tony in an effort to explain.
Steve laughed to himself, wishing for nothing more than to hold her after a long 5 months away.
“Give it up for Y/N L/N!” Tony’s introduction came to a close, signaling for her to start playing. It really was over the top considering he was only introducing her to the people who have become family to her, but she let him do his thing.
“Thanks, Tony.” She smiled fondly at Steve before introducing the song. “I wrote this song for someone special. As you all know, my parents died in a car accident a few years ago. Don’t worry, the song’s not that sad.” She earned a few laughs from her friends before she continued. “Ever since I was little, I wanted a love like theirs. It seemed so magical. Well, I found that love.” She smiled at Steve again.
“This one is called Like My Father.” With the name of the song announce, she started singing. Her eyes never left Steve’s.
I wanna come home to roses
Today had been the day from hell for Y/N. First, she woke up late due to accidentally setting her alarm for 6 pm instead of 6 am. She rushed to get out of the tower on time, only for the subway line she was supposed to take to be closed for repairs, making rushing a complete waste since she was going to be late anyway.
In her haste to leave on time, she forwent breakfast which only made her more irritable. By the time she made it to the studio, she had missed her morning meeting and had to play catchup.
The day only got worse from there. Something went wrong with every song she was meant to work on. Sometimes it was a small thing, like a guitar being out of tune. Other times, the song just didn’t feel right. No matter how many different ideas she tried to work on, she just kept running in circles.
By lunch, she was ready to give up and just go home. Unfortunately, her label was having a meeting to discuss progress for the next album’s lead single. So instead, she tried to cheer herself up with her favorite lunch. Just when she was sitting down to eat, someone bumped into her and spilled the entire meal onto the floor.
Suffice to say, by the end of the day, she was ready to collapse into her boyfriend’s arms and sleep the weekend away. However, her boyfriend was currently on a mission out saving the world, so not even he would be able to lift her spirits this time.
She trudged down the hall toward their shared apartment, eager to take a shower and lay down. It wouldn’t be as comforting without Steve, but it was still better than nothing. Finally reaching the door, she turned the key and shoved her way inside. Instantly, she stopped in her tracks.
The scent of tomato sauce filled the air. The soft sounds of Steve’s old music floated through the air, further adding to the welcoming atmosphere. She stood frozen, eyes filling with tears when Steve noticed her. He smiled, too far away to notice the tears, before turning around to get something from the counter. He held whatever it was in both hands behind his back as he walked up to her, a frown slowly forming as he noticed her expression.
“What’s wrong?” He questioned, hands instantly moving around his body to hold her only to be impaired by a beautiful bouquet of white and peach colored roses. Her tears fell despite her smile. She eagerly took the flowers, throwing her arms around him in a tight hug.
“I’m so happy you’re home.” She took a few deep breaths, calming herself before leaning back to press a soft kiss to his lips. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Steve replied easily. “Do you want to talk about it?” Despite not knowing exactly what happened, Steve could tell she had a bad day.
She shook her head, her small smile growing as she inhaled the scent of the roses. “No, I just want to be with you.” She leaned further into the embrace, relishing in the comfort Steve always provided.
“That can be arranged.” Steve smiled, carrying her to the couch to eat.
And dirty little notes on post-its
Three weeks. It had been three weeks since Steve left for his mission and Y/N was still finding his notes around their shared apartment. Every time she added a newly found note to the box, she read through all the previous notes as well. It never failed to cheer her up.
Most of them were simple comments about how much he loved her. Little sayings like “I love you to the moon and back” or “My love for you is as endless as space.” Despite the cheesiness, she couldn’t help but smile with each new note found.
But this newest note was… different. The 21 words scrawled on a bright blue post-it had her flushing instantly.
“I miss the way you feel pressed up against me, can’t wait to come home and pin you against the wall”
Suffice to say, Steve couldn’t come home soon enough.
And when my hair starts turning gray, he’ll say I’m like a fine wine better with age.
“Oh my god.” Her voice was flat as she emerged from their shared bedroom dressed for another one of Tony’s galas. Steve turned to look at her, eyebrows raised.
“What? You look amazing.” He smirked when she blushed.
“Steve. I just found a gray hair.” She pouted, holding the offending piece of hair between her thumb and pointer. “Is this what it feels like to be old?”
“You’re not old.” He chuckled at her dramatics. “And even when all of your hair is gray, I’ll love you even more. Like cheese…” He paused, trying to think of a better comparison. “And wine, you just get better with age.”
“Yeah, whatever.” She rolled her eyes before moving to throw the hair away.
“I mean it. I’m going to love you for the rest of our lives.” He smiled, a familiar fondness in his eyes. She moved closer to embrace him.
“I love you too.”
I guess I learned it from my parents, that true love starts with friendship.
She was nearly running down the street, doing her best to slow down the dog pulling her forward.
“Hudson! Stop!” She tried to speak calmly like her manager- the dog’s owner- instructed, but it was no use. Hudson would not stop running, no matter how hard she tried to make him. “Hudson!” She yelled his name again, surprised when he actually halted.
So surprised in fact, that she was still hurtling forwards, tripping over the now stationary animal. She braced herself for impact, eyes squeezing shut and hands sticking out to catch herself, only for the impact to never come. Instead, two warms hands caught her mid-fall.
Her eyes shot open, heart racing and breathing labored. The man who caught her helped her steady herself on her feet before letting go, smiling sheepishly.
“Thank you.” She breathed out, still taken aback by the turn of events.
“You’re welcome.” He replied kindly. “You’re dog’s pretty strong.” His grimace at his own awkwardness went unnoticed by her as she looked at the dog in question.
“My friends’ dog actually. I’m dog sitting this week.” She smiled, relieved to shift the topic of conversation from her to the dog. “He normally listens really well, but I guess he really wanted to get to the park. I’m Y/N, and this here is Hudson.”
“Nice to meet you both, I’m Steve.” He shook her hand, blushing slightly from the contact. Before she could reply, Hudson leaped at a squirrel, pulling her off balance again. Steve reached out to steady her again.
“Here, let me help.” He shifted the leash from her hand to his own, having a much easier time resisting Hudson’s pulling.
“Thank you… again.” She smiled.
The two walked around the park with Hudson every day that week, becoming fast friends. She wasn’t offended when he didn’t recognize her as one of the biggest names in music, just as he wasn’t offended it took three walks for her to realize he was that Steve Rogers.
They understood each other, despite the wild differences in occupation. Steve could easily relate to Y/N’s aversion to the media. Y/N knew what it felt like to have a team of people relying on you. The two just clicked, and thus a beautiful friendship was formed.
A kiss on the forehead. A date night.
“Hey Steve.” She greeted him warmly when they met up for their weekly coffee. He smiled, but didn’t verbally respond.
The two got their coffee, sitting at a table hidden towards the back. Steve’s replies were short, as if he was thinking of something else during their conversation. By the fifth comment of hers that he merely nodded his head or hummed in response too, Y/N decided to address it. “Are you okay?”
“Go out with me.” He replied quickly, eyes going wide when he realized what he said. Her own eyes widened in response, taken by surprise. “Sorry! I just, I mean- let me start over.” He pleaded, relief filling him when she nodded.
“We’ve been friends for a while now…” She nodded along, eyes still wide. “But, I want more. Let me take you to dinner. And not like we’ve been doing. Let me take you on a date?” He smiled nervously, hands fidgeting with the lid of his coffee cup.
“I’d like that.” She replied simply, unable to form a more complicated sentence due to the butterflies in her stomach.
“Yeah?” He released his breath, unaware he had been holding it. When she nodded, a wide smile appeared on his face. “Good. I’ll pick you up at 7 tomorrow night.”
“You mean I have to wait?” She pouted playfully as they both stood up to leave. He laughed, moving his arm around her shoulders to guide her out of the cafe.
“Just until tomorrow.” He smiled fondly, pressing a kiss to her forehead before helping her into her car.
“Tomorrow then.” She smiled. Tomorrow couldn’t come soon enough.
Fake an apology after a fight
“Y/N?” Steve questioned as he entered their apartment. He looked around, unsurprised to see her covered in blankets on the couch. “I’m sorry.” He tried for a small smile, knowing it was of no real use.
“No you’re not.” She pouted, rolling her eyes. “But I forgive you anyway.” She gestured for him to join her on the couch. He jumped at the chance, quickly moving to hold her close to him.
“I am sorry we fought.” He spoke up after a few minutes, still trying to clear the air.
“Me too. It was stupid.” She shook her head, cuddling closer to him. “I just don’t understand why you like it.” She made a face, grimacing at just the thought.
“It’s good! Pizza has really taken on a whole new life since the 30s.” Steve quipped, smiling when you laughed.
“That doesn’t mean pineapple is an okay topping.” She could fell herself getting worked up again, but ultimately the two burst into a fit of giggles. What a stupid fight.
I wanna road trip in the summers
“Steve! You were supposed to turn there!” Y/N laughed as Steve grumbled about the GPS and his preference for maps. “This is why you should’ve let me drive.”
“Nope, because then I couldn’t surprise you.” He smirked, briefly looking at her in the passenger seat.
“What surprise?” She smiled fondly, knowing he wouldn’t tell her.
“You’ll see. Now turn off the GPS, we’re not actually going home.”
Steve drove for the next few hours until the two arrived at a small house just off the beach in Maine. He pulled into the driveway, turning to find Y/N asleep with her head pressed against the window.
“Y/N, we’re here.” He smiled at her groggy state, laughing when her eyes lit up.
“Are we in Maine?” Her eyes filled with tears, a combination of nostalgia, Steve’s surprise, and residual sleepiness the cause.
“We are. As close as I could find to where you used to come when you were little.” He responded, a shy smile on his face. Despite how long they’d been together, Steve was always nervous about surprising her. “I talked to your manager, and you’ve got the weekend off. We’re going to just relax on the beach for three days.”
“It’s perfect.” She gave him a watery smile, pulling him from the back of his neck until her lips met his. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything, just-“ Y/N cut him off with another kiss. It was passionate and heated despite the limited area for movement in the car.
“I love you.” She breathed out the words quickly, but meant it with her whole being. “I love you so much. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” Tears still burned in her eyes, but the overwhelming happiness she felt made it worth it.
Steve looked shocked at her proclamation, but quickly recovered. “I love you too. More than I’ve ever loved anyone.” Y/N knew exactly what he meant with those words, and it filled her with so much happiness she thought she might combust. He kissed her again, and again, and again.
They shared a few more quick pecks before finally getting out of the car.
I wanna make fun of each other
Meeting Steve’s friends was nerve wracking for a multitude of reasons.
Steve was the only person Y/N had outside of her career. All of her friends were somehow tied to her music, except Steve. Her parents died a few years ago, and she didn’t have any other family. If things went poorly with Steve’s friends, would he leave too?
Plus, all of his friends are superheroes. That’s an intimidating group of people to meet even if you aren’t trying to win them over so you can keep dating their friend.
“Just relax, they’re going to love you.” Steve whispered into her ear as the two rode the elevator up to the main residential floor. Steve did what he could to keep the event simple. It was just drinks with his friends, who happened to be Avengers.
“If you say so.” She smiled nervously, laughing to herself. Before Steve could reply with more words of encouragement, the elevator doors were opening. Steve lead her down the hall to a room that resembled a lounge in a fancy hotel. Bars lined two of the walls, a mixture of blue and white furniture sprinkled throughout the room.
“Ahh, here they are!” Tony Stark quickly rose from his seat, ready to meet the woman stealing away all of the Captain’s time.
“Tony, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is-”
“Tony Stark, I know.” She quipped. In her stress to meet all of Steve’s friends, she forgot to mention that she had already met the billionaire. “It’s good to see you again.”
“Again?” Steve questioned a the same time Tony recognized you. His jaw dropped as he turned back to Steve.
“We met at a fundraiser a few years ago-“ Tony jumped in before you could finish the explanation.
“You’re dating Y/N L/N? The Y/N L/N? Famous singer-songwriter, been topping the charts for years, Y/N L/N?” He balked, eyes rapidly flicking between Steve and Y/N.
“Um… yes?” Steve questioned Tony’s reaction, unsure why he was so surprised. “I told you her name already…” He shook his head, waiting for the teasing he knew was incoming.
“You didn’t mention it was actually her! I just thought it was someone with the same name!” Tony nearly yelled, still thrown off by the surprise.
“What’s going on over here?” Natasha walked up to the trio, one eyebrow lifted at all the noise.
“Y/N L/N!” Tony gestured to her. She nervously waved to Natasha, sticking her hand out in greeting.
“Nice to meet you.” She mumbled, one hand still holding Steve’s in a death grip.
“You too, I’m Natasha.” The two women shook hands, giving Tony time to finally find his words.
“I have to know, did Capsicle recognize you when you met?” Tony lead everyone back to the couches, foregoing the rest of the introductions to start pestering you with questions.
“I think he’s a bit outside of my target audience age wise. I don’t hold it against him.” Y/N replied, laughing when Steve rolled his eyes.
“Oh snap, she just called you old.” Sam chimed in, reaching out a hand to introduce himself. “Sam Wilson.”
You smiled at him, introducing yourself as you shook his hand.
“Here’s the real question. Did you recognize him?” Bucky questioned, already knowing the answer. Steve introduced Y/N to Bucky early on in their friendship when Bucky followed him to one of their weekly coffee dates.
“Bucky, you already know the answer to that.” Y/N deadpanned, not eager to share her lack of knowledge on world events. Steve cut in to answer before Bucky could reply.
“She did not. Told me the name sounded so familiar, but she couldn’t place it.” Steve laughed as he teased you.
“You make me sound so stupid! I knew who Captain America was, I just didn’t realize it was you.” She huffed, annoyed with how quickly the tables turned.
Steve changed the topic by moving to introduce her to the rest of the avengers in attendance; Wanda, Vision, Thor, Clint, Bruce, and Peter.
Y/N continued to share stories with the group, laughing and joking at both her and Steve’s expense. Steve smiled fondly as he watched her interact with his friends, getting along just as well as he knew she would.
I wanna rock out to Billy Joel
“Stupid. All of these ideas are stupid. How am I supposed to put out another album when I can’t even write one decent song.” Y/N huffed to herself, unaware of Steve’s presence in the room.
He moved silently through the room as she continued writing down and crossing out ideas. Suddenly, the sound of Billy Joel’s We Didn’t Start the Fire filled the room.
“Steve?” She jumped at the noise, smiling when she found him next to the record player. “Billy Joel?’ She questioned.
“You played me this song after a bad mission. Told me to think about it whenever I needed a reminder that the world’s problems aren’t my fault. Thought it might help.” He shrugged, a small smile on his face.
“I love you.” She got up from the couch, eager to pull him into a bone crushing hug.
“I love you too.” He returned her hug, careful not to actually crush her bones.
The two of them spent the next few hours playing Billy Joel, dancing and singing around the apartment.
And flip our kids off when they call us old
“Okay, grandpa.” Sam chuckled.
“Hey! I’m the only one allowed to make fun of how old he is.” Y/N playfully glared at Sam, enjoying their newfound friendship. “Plus, he’s younger than Bucky.”
“Rude.” Bucky called from the other couch, mostly ignoring Sam and Y/N’s bickering. It was a bit weird for him to hear someone else yelling at Sam, but he appreciated it nonetheless.
“Everyone calls him old.” Sam narrowed his eyes, confusion playing across his face.
“Yeah, but when it’s not me I have to defend him. Like when Pepper defends Tony from Morgan.” She easily compared her and Steve’s relationship to the couple, not realizing the weight of the moment.
“You see your relationship like Tony and Pepper?” Bucky questioned, now completely focused on Y/N.
She shrugged casually, unaware of the tension she created. “I mean, yeah. I think that’s where we headed.” She would be the first to admit she loved Steve more than she’s ever loved a boyfriend before. She likes to think Steve feels the same. “Why do you ask?”
Bucky shook his head, trying his best to seem casual. “Just curious is all.” He waited a few minutes before leaving, allowing Sam and Y/N to start up their conversation again. As soon as he was out of the room, he asked Friday for Steve’s location.
He had news to report.
He’ll accidentally burn our dinner
“Honey, I’m home!” Y/N called as she walked through the door. She was in a surprisingly good mood after a mediocre day.
“You seem happy.” Steve greeted as he walked into the living room from the kitchen. He pulled her close, kissing her before resting his chin on top of her head.
“I am happy. You’re here, what’s there to be mad about?” She squeezed him tighter, enjoying the feeling of his arms wrapped around her.
“You make me happy too.” He pulled her onto the couch, eagerly kissing her after the day apart. He had returned from a mission just before she left for work, and seeing each other in passing was not enough.
“I missed you.” He mumbled against her mouth.
“I missed you too- is something burning?” She leaned away from him, sniffing the air.
“Shit!” He jumped from the couch, running into the kitchen as you laughed at his antics.
“Steve, language!” She called out in mock shock, laughing harder as he whined about burnt pizza.
And let me be the Scrabble winner
“Steve, sucks at Scrabble? Since when?” Wanda questioned as she ate brunch with Y/N and Nat.
“Um, always?” Y/N replied as if it was obvious.
“I have never seen Steve lose a game of Scrabble.” Nat chimed in, smirking as if she already knew what was going on (and lets face it, she probably did).
“Well, I always beat him.” She shrugged. Wanda smirked, clearly forming a plan.
“Well, you’ll just have to play Scrabble tonight and Nat and I will check if he can play better words or not!” Nat nodded along having seen this plan coming.
“Fine.” Y/N agreed, knowing there was no way of talking them out of this.
-
“Steve! Let’s play Scrabble!” Y/N smiled knowing Steve would give her anything she asked for. He walked into the living room with the box, a grin on his face.
The two of them set up the game and drew letters, immediately jumping into the game. After a few turns, Y/N texted Nat and Wanda to come into the living room to enact their plan. She watched from the corner of her eye as the two women watched Steve rearrange his letters.
When he played CAT for 7 points, Wanda gasped. Steve jumped slightly, turning around to investigate the noise.
“Oh my god.” Y/N’s jaw dropped as she realized Steve’s been letting her win.
“He was all set to play ADEQUATE, for probably a billion points, and he played CAT instead!” Wanda pointed accusingly at Steve while Nat just grinned.
“You’ve been letting me win this whole time?” Y/N threw a pillow at him, upset with the confirmation.
“Not every time! Sometimes I have bad letters.” He rubbed the back of his neck shyly. “You just look so happy when you win.”
A small smile took over Y/N’s frown. How could she be annoyed when he was just trying to make her happy.
“I love you.” She rolled her eyes at his puppy dog look. “But don’t go easy on me this time!”
“I love you too.” Steve smirked knowingly and suddenly Y/N was rethinking everything.
And when my body changes shapes, he’ll say ‘oh my god you look hot today’
“I look fat.” Y/N huffed as she plopped down on the couch, still trying to find a dress to wear out with Steve tonight.
“You’re beautiful.” Steve commented from the kitchen, causing her to shriek.
“You’re not supposed to be home yet!” She placed her hand on her heart, feeling the rapid beating from Steve scaring her.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. But you do look beautiful.” He smirked as he walked closer, easily lifting her from the couch. “You look hot everyday.”
He kissed her passionately to convey just how much he believed what he was saying.
I need a man who’s patient and kind
“Steve, I need a few more minutes!” She called as she ran into their bedroom from the office. The two of them were meant to be leaving for dinner 45 minutes ago, but Y/N’s manager forced her into a last minute meeting with a potential collaborator.
“That’s fine.” He called back, a smile on his face. “Take your time, love.”
“How are you so patient.” Y/N huffed as she quickly changed clothes, annoyed with herself for delaying their plans.
“Hey, it’s okay.” He came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her to him. “It happens. I’ve missed dates for mission before.”
“Yeah, but that’s important.” Y/N replied, leaning into his embrace.
“So is your work.” He chuckled as she rolled her eyes.
“Not so important it couldn’t wait a day.” She closed her eyes, taking a moment to just breath. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Steve questioned, genuinely confused.
“For being so kind and understanding. For never making me feel like my job is less important than yours, even though it totally is. For being you.” She replied, easily listing things she’s thankful for.
“Thank you for being you.” He replied casually, still holding her to him. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” She smiled before wiggling from his arms to finish getting ready.
Gets out of the car and holds the door
“I’m finally ready. Let’s go!” Y/N called, fully letting go of her annoyance at her manager for delaying her dinner plans.
“Perfect.” Steve grabbed his keys before turning to look at her. He sucked in a breath, eyes slowing gazing over her body. “You’re perfect.”
She blushed, kissing him on the cheek in response. Steve lead her to the car, opening the door for her, pressing a kiss to her lips before jogging around to the driver’s side.
“Where are we going?” She questioned, eager to finally be able to focus on him.
“Dinner.” He replied, a cheeky grin forming.
“Fine, don’t tell me.” She deadpanned, smiling as he laughed.
They discussed anything and everything they could think of as Steve drove to the restaurant, topics ranging from new songs they both liked to what a T-Rex would have for breakfast if it could cook like a person.
Eventually, the car pulled to a stop outside of a small, family owned Italian place. The lights were on, but there was nobody seated at any of the tables.
“Are you sure they’re open?” Y/N questioned, confused by his smile.
“They’re open… just for us.” He smiled shyly. “I wanted you to have a peaceful dinner, so Tony helped me find a place I could book for us for the night. No Y/N L/N or Captain America fans to interrupt.”
“Steve…” She trailed off, unable to form words. She hadn’t even gotten out of the car yet and she was speechless. He walked back around the car, opening the door and guiding her inside. She let him lead her all the way through the building until they reached the outdoor seating.
A string of tapered lightbulbs was strung across the patio, lighting up a single table in the middle. A few candles littered the area, adding to the romantic atmosphere.
“It’s beautiful.” She smiled, leaning in to kiss him before sitting down. Before she could say anything else, a familiar face greeted her.
“My name is Sam, and I’ll be serving you this evening. Can I get you started with something to drink?” Sam smiled at your shocked expression.
“Sam? What are you doing here?” She laughed, confused and overwhelmed with joy.
“I told you, nobody to interrupt us tonight.” Steve smiled, glaring at Sam for playing around. “Sam, I already told you what to bring out.”
“Couldn’t resist.” Sam winked, quickly returning with the drinks Steve requested. Y/N and Steve thanked him before returning to their conversation.
“You didn’t have to go to this much trouble.” Y/N spoke softly, still blown away by the effort and planning Steve must have put into this.
“I know. But I wanted to. You deserve it.” He smiled, taking her hadn’t across the table. “Now, I’ll bet you’re hungry since we were supposed to eat an hour ago.” As if on cue, Sam returned with Bucky, both carrying plates of food. “Let’s eat.”
The two of them continued their conversation from the car as they ate, topics again roaming all over the place. Before she knew it, Y/N had finished eating and Sam was back with dessert.
She looked down at the peach cobbler, laughing to herself. “You know me so well.” She smiled, grinning even more when he offered to share his chocolate cake. “The best of both worlds.”
When she finished eating and looked back up at Steve he was missing from his spot across the table. Instead of sitting in his chair, he was kneeling on the patio beside the table, a velvet box in his hand.
Her eyes widened as she took in the sight before her. Suddenly everything made sense. The lack of rushing, the completely private restaurant, not even having servers in the building. He wanted this to be a private moment.
“Y/N, the day I met you changed my life. I’ll have to thank Hudson for dragging you into the park that day, because I’ve never met anyone as special as you. Every moment with you is like a gift, and I want to spend the rest of my days experiencing life with you. Will you marry me?”
She nodded for a few seconds before finally finding her voice. “Yes.” It was barely above a whisper, but it was enough for Steve to delicately place the ring on her finger. “I love you so much.” She smiled, throwing herself into his arms the second he stood up.
“I love you too.” He replied, framing her face with his hands before kissing her.
I wanna slow dance in the living room like we’re 18 at senior prom
The ride home from dinner was filled with hand holding, giddy squeals, and hundreds of “I love you’s” from both Steve and Y/N. They eagerly ran back to their apartment, giggling like teenagers, high on love.
Steve quickly pulled her into the living room, kissing her over and over. She reciprocated, eager to share her happiness.
“Steve?” She questioned between kisses, waiting for him to hum in response. “Will you dance with me?” She smiled at him. Surprisingly, the two had never really danced together before. The only opportunity would have been at one of Tony’s parties, but they’re always so busy mingling with everyone.
“I’d love to.” He replied, that same fond smile on his face that she’d grown to love more than anything. She clapped, running over to the record player. She chose the first love song she could find, Cheek to Cheek by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.
As the music played, the two swayed together, feeling more in love than ever before. Steve quietly sung the words in her ear, expressing all the raw emotion he’d been feeling since she said yes.
“Heaven, I’m in heaven. And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak.” Y/N joined him, singing along to convey her own happiness as well.
“And I seem to find the happiness I seek, when we’re out together, dancing cheek to cheek.”
They danced around the living room for a few songs, letting the record play through. It wasn’t until the music stopped that they even realized the song changed, too lost in the feeling of being together.
And grow old with someone who makes me feel young
I need a man who loves me like, my father loves my mom
“We’re getting married tomorrow.” Y/N floated through the halls, humming Cheek to Cheek again. After dancing to it the night of their engagement, the couple decided it would be their first dance song. Steve walked up behind her, picking her up and spinning around until they reached the kitchen.
“We are.” He replied, just as elated as her. She giggled playfully, smiling wider than ever before. She was just about to say something when Nat and Wanda bust into the room.
“C’mon. It’s time to go!” Wanda called, gathering Y/N’s belongings.
“Where?” The woman questioned, still wrapping in Steve’s arms.
“You’re getting married tomorrow. It’s bad luck to see each other before the wedding.” Wanda spoke as if it was obvious.
“Nat?” Y/N questioned, hoping someone would understand it was just a superstition. Nat just shrugged, helping Wanda as she pulled you out of the room.
“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” Steve called after her, a smile on his lips as he thought about seeing you again.
-
Standing at the altar, looking into Steve’s eyes, everything she prepared to say dissolved from her mind. She got lost in his blue eyes, listening to him recite his vows. All the love she felt exploded in one quick statement.
“You make me feel young.” She blurted out the words without thinking.
“Is that another old man joke?” He crinkled his eyebrows, confused by the exclamation. The onlookers chuckled.
“No! That’s not what I meant at all.” She laughed, burying her face in his chest. “I just mean, we’re grown adults.” He nodded, still confused. “But when I’m with you, I feel like a kid again. Like all my problems go away and I can just be in love with you. Like my parents were.” Tears formed in her eyes as she thought about the gravity of her statement.
Steve knew how much her parents love influenced her life. She had multiple songs inspired by their relationship and happiness.
“Oh, sweetheart. You make me feel young too. Like how I should have felt as a kid.” He decided against further explanation, not wanting to weigh down the ceremony with talk of war and his sickly youth.
“I just, I never thought I’d actually find a love like theirs, despite how much I wanted to. I think they would’ve loved you.” Steve wiped her tears as they rolled down her cheeks. He pressed his forehead to hers just feeling the need to be close.
“My ma would’ve loved you too.” He replied, his own throat getting tight. They cried as they finally said “I do”, no place they’d rather be.
And if he lives up to my father, maybe he can teach our daughter
Y/N rose from the piano as she sang the last line, exposing her growing belly to the group of Avengers, but more specifically to Steve.
What it takes to love a queen, she should know she’s royalty.
Everyone cheered for her performance, but her eyes were only on Steve’s. His jaw hung open, tears pooling in his eyes. She made her way to him, everyone moving out of her way.
As soon as she reached Steve, he pulled her into a gentle hug, eagerly kissing her.
“I love you so much.” He whispered, holding her close.
“I love you too.” She replied, just as emotional as he was.
“Are you really pregnant?” He leaned back, chuckling at the “duh” look on her face. She wiped his tears as they fell.
“I found out just after you left.” She smiled, leaning into him as he lowered his forehead to hers.
“We’re going to have a daughter.” He sounded breathless, overwhelmed with the news.
“I would’ve told you in private, but Tony insisted on having this party.” She laughed when he rolled his eyes at Tony’s antics.
“You wrote me a song.” He smiled, still holding her close.
“Oh, baby. I’ve written you dozens of songs.” She laughed when he leaned back in confusion. “They’re not all good. I wanted to finish the album before I played it for you. This was the last song.” She smiled, still overwhelmingly in love with the man in front of her.
“I love you. So much.” They spoke at the same time, swaying together as Tony invited all the remaining guests into the ballroom. They missed the song, but it was clear to everyone the room how much the two loved each other.
permanent taglist:
@averyhotchner
@jesuswasnotawhiteman
@strawberryspence
@sebastnstn
marvel taglist:
@leyannrae
@livstilinski
@oceaniamaddness
@justreadingficsdontmindme
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soramei · 3 years ago
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Intentional - Part 3
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Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)
Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?
Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn
Warnings: none right now, eventual smut
Word Count: 4.6k
Masterlist
A/N: INTRODUCING: I.N.tentional: Intentional, but told through I.N.'s POV! give it a read! itll take 1 min tops!
Taglist (reply to be tagged!): @planetdemon​ @hvunvely​ @fluffybitch0325​ 
last thing: welcome back hyunjin I missed you! skz ot8!
“Y/n,” his low and steady voice echoed around the pillars of the parking lot, “what are you doing here?”
“I’m looking for my friend.” You simply answered, slowly taking short steps backwards. It was best to not tell anybody that Yoojin was injured.
“Is she here? I’ll help you find her.” His eyebrows furrowed as he took quick strides towards you.
“No- that’s- it’s okay. I’m uhm, I’ll just try finding her myself.” You clenched your shaking fists. “Thank you for offering though.” You quickly added, not wanting to come off as rude to your boss.
“Y/n. Why do you keep avoiding me?” Manager Kim grabbed your shoulder with one hand. You felt the tips of his fingers dig through your jacket. The blend of cigarettes and cologne wafted past your nostrils.
“Manager Kim, please, I really need to get going.” You begged as you heard your voice start to waver. Why couldn’t the word ‘stop’ just come out of your mouth?
Manager Kim didn’t seem to care as he simply pressed his fingers harder on your shoulder, tightening his grip. He took a step closer, tipping his head down to look at you as he exhaled through his mouth. The stench of cigarettes became stronger.
“Yesterday, on your first day, I’ve been nothing but nice to you. Y/n, I am your boss. Stop avoiding me.” He spoke through clenched teeth. His words became quieter and quieter as his monologue progressed.
You had no idea what to do. It was obvious by now that Yoojin wasn’t in this parking lot as you would have heard her by now. The sun was setting fast, and the lot was basically empty, save the lot attendant — who was busy watching a movie on his phone when you first spoke to him. However, this attendant was your best bet. If you somehow managed to run past him, Manager Kim would most likely stop following you. This was your plan.
You quickly slipped out of your jacket, catching Manager Kim off guard. He lost grip of your shoulder, and the only thing he had a hold on was your now discarded jacket. Then, you made a run for it. You had only caught a glimpse of Manager Kim’s irate expression before adrenaline filled your muscles once again.
“Oh, you don’t run from me this time.” You heard him drop your jacket, then soon after, footsteps.
You didn’t have time to fixate on his movements as your only goal at the moment was to reach the attendant. You ran and ran, and after a short while, you saw the attendant’s post.
It was apparent that Manager Kim also noticed that there was another person nearby because you heard his footsteps gradually slow down and then come to a halt. However, you were too scared to turn back to confirm your suspicions and just kept running. Once you reached the front entrance of the parking lot — where the attendant was — you slowed down your running to make it appear as if nothing had happened. God knows the amount of slander you would’ve gotten in the office if you had gotten Manager Kim in trouble.
You tried to keep yourself composed as you left the parking lot, however, nothing could stop the uncontrollable shaking of your hands and the erratic beating of your heart. Once outside, your brain was in jumbles — what the hell just happened?
The wind nipped at your skin as you sprinted towards the familiar blue building. It was the only place you could think of to hide as you wait out Manager Kim. Usually, the man acted polite, if not a little standoffish, but there was something so sinister about his voice tonight that gave you an uncomfortable chill.
Finally nearing your office building, you held it out for a final push as you hurriedly entered the front doors. As soon as you were inside, you felt the adrenaline reach your body. You put your hands on your knees for support as you tried to catch your breaths. You still couldn’t process what just happened with Manager Kim.
“Y/n.” A hand touched your shoulder.
Instinctively, you flinched and wrapped your arms around your shoulder.
“Are you okay?” The hand immediately fell off your shoulder. You recognized this voice. It was Bang Chan.
It might have been the wave of relief rushing through you — or that you started to process what had just happened — but as soon as those words left his lips you couldn’t contain the tears rushing out of your eyes.
“Yeah, I’m okay.” You sniffed, turning away from him to wipe your tears away. It was so embarrassing that you were crying in front of somebody you just met. Moreover, you could sense people in the building starting to stare.
Bang Chan looked at you in confusion for a moment. “Did you want to take a walk? We can find a quieter place you can uhh…” He drifted off towards the end, scratching the back of his neck.
You simply nodded your head. Bang Chan gestured for you to follow him whilst making sure to keep his distance from you. You stared at the back of his hoodie as you mindlessly followed him in silence. He meandered through the building halls naturally and confidently, like he had been here his whole life. You sped up your steps to walk beside him, scared that somebody would somehow snatch you from behind. Bang Chan turned his head to check on you before continuing his trek.
He led you towards the familiar elevators that you took every morning so far, but this time, he pressed the button of an unfamiliar floor. This elevator ride was shorter than what you were used to, however you still felt the floating sensation that came with every elevator ride.
The elevator dinged, letting you know that the two of you had arrived. Bang Chan’s arms gestured for you to get off first, and so you did. He got off after you and started leading you to his destination. You walked in silence with your arms still crossed over your torso.
He kept up his pace, and soon, stopped in front of a door. Using a key card to unlock the door, he opened the door for you to go in first.
Although it was cozy, the room was small. With a desk on one side and a single black couch on the other, it was clear that this room wasn’t meant for a lot of people. You looked at the walls. Green, strange.
“Hold on, lemme just…” Bang Chan mumbleded as he rushed past you to the couch and tossed a shirt and an opened bag of chips out of the way. “Here, you can sit.”
You sat down. “Thanks.” You rasped.
“Did you want some water?” He asked.
“Yes, please.” You replied in a quiet voice, not wanting him to see that you cried — although it was really obvious by now.
He left in a flash, leaving you alone in the room. At least the door is locked. You thought.
The unnerving silence of the room left you alone with just your thoughts. Thoughts on Manager Kim, on how you cried in front of Bang Chan, of Yoojin. Yoojin!
You pulled out your phone and found yourself filled with worry again. You quickly dialled her contact number.
“Y/n?” A voice picked up in an almost confused manner.
“Yoojin, thank god. Are you okay? I went to where you said you were and couldn’t find you.”
“Oh my god, Y/n!” She suddenly bursted out. “I’m so, so sorry. I messed up the parking lot I was in with yours! I’m the world’s dumbest person. I don’t deserve your friendship.”
“Yoojin, it’s okay, mistakes happen. And friends always help each other.” You try to calm her down. “As long as you’re safe right now.”
“I am, thank you Y/n.” She sniffled. “But, you didn’t run into any trouble trying to find me right?”
You decided not to tell her about Manager Kim. She had a long day already, what with her injury. “I didn’t. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”
“Oh,” she said, “alright. In that case, I’ll go get some rest now. Goodbye Y/n.”
“Bye Yoojin, I hope you get well soon.” You hung up.
With Yoojin being safe, you had one less worry on your plate. However, now that you weren’t consumed by your worry for Yoojin, the only thought that you had was the looming threat of Manager Kim. What if he was still looking for me? You thought. What if he tries this on me again? What if I get fired?
The dark thoughts started to overwhelm you so much to the point where you couldn’t control your tears again. You put your face in your hands, silently begging yourself to stop crying. You were scared. Scared for your future, your safety, and your reputation.
“This place is so big, you’d think they’d place a few more vending machines…” Bang Chan abruptly interrupted your thoughts.
You flinched, startled.
“Hey, it’s okay, it’s just me.” He had that boyish grin on his face as he unscrewed the lid of the plastic water bottle before handing it to you.
You accepted the water and took a sip. “Sorry, I’m just—” You were scared to finish that sentence. If Bang Chan knew how rude you were to his boss, he could get you fired as well.
Bang Chan looked at you in confusion for a couple of seconds. “You know,” He started, “you don’t have to tell me what happened, but I’m here for you. We’re friends, remember?” He sat on the chair at the desk.
“Thank you, Bang Chan.” You smiled at him. “I appreciate it.”
“You have a nice smile.”
“What?” You knitted your eyebrows.
Bang Chan cleared his throat. “Nevermind, umm, do you wanna see what I’m working on?”
“Umm, sure.” You replied awkwardly.
Bang Chan got out of his chair and turned it around for you to sit in, which you did. He turned the chair around to face the monitor and leaned over you to log in to his computer. His bangs flopped in front of his eyes.
“This was that song I was talking about yesterday.” Bang Chan pressed a button, and a sound started to emit from the complicated looking software. It was a simple but nice beat, although all the audio clips and millions of random colours on the screen seemed to contradict that.
“There’s so many options on the screen, how do you know what you’re doing?”
“Honestly, it takes time to get used to. I’m still not sure what some of these settings do.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Do you wanna try it out?”
You nodded your head, eagerly. You had never seen something like this before. Bang Chan reached over you to take hold of the mouse. He scrolled through hundreds of folders before opening the one he was looking for.
“These are just random audio clips I usually use in songs,” he said, “you can drag them on the screen and it’ll be added in the song.”
You dragged a random audio clip to where he said so and clicked play. The song played, but with a very loud and badly timed bass in the middle. The both of you laughed, and you started to add more random clips to the song. Soon, the song became so cluttered with your add-ons that it started sounding unrecognizable.
“It’s so bad.” You laughed, turning your head around. Bang Chan was already looking at you. His expression was unreadable. You looked back at him.
Silence.
After a moment, you realized that you were just looking at him with no words. You cleared your throat, turning back to the monitor. “What if I add this one?”
You dragged a random audio to the beginning of the song and played it. As soon as the song started, the audio clip interrupted everything else. It was an incredibly loud audio of Bang Chan yelling ‘Stray Kids’. The two of you bursted out laughing.
The two of you stayed in that room for hours, just playing around on his editing software and with his equipment. He showed you how he made new songs, and how he would use his mic and keyboard to add to them. You even asked for him to play you some of the old songs he published. It took a long time to convince him, but he embarrassingly complied. The two of you were having so much fun with music that you did not realize how late it was until you remembered to check the time. That seemed to be a recurring incident for you.
“It’s getting kinda late,” you said. “I should go, I have work tomorrow.”
Bang Chan agreed, “I’ll walk you out.”
And so, you gathered your bag and followed Bang Chan out of his little office to the elevators. The two of you rode the elevator in silence, but this time, it was a comfortable silence. You didn’t feel the need to make any small talk, nor fiddle your thumbs.
You continued your way out, finally exiting the front doors of the building. However, you came to instantly regret that as a gust of wind hit your bare skin, eliciting a shiver from you. Of course, you didn’t have your jacket. It was lost in the midst of your run-in with Manager Kim. You reminded yourself to look for it tomorrow.
It seemed that Bang Chan had noticed. “It gets cold fast here this time of year,” he shrugged off his hoodie. “Here, you can take this.”
“No, it’s fine, really.” You said. “I don’t live too far anyways.”
“You can’t catch a cold on your first week of work,” he said, “I would feel guilty.”
Bang Chan shoved his hoodie in your hands. It seemed like he wasn’t going to budge on his decision, so you shrugged it on. It fit very loosely — the hem of the hoodie reached your thigh and you had to roll the sleeves up quite a bit to expose your hands. It was warm though. And it smelled like him.
“Thanks,” you looked at your shoes, “for this and everything else.”
“Don’t thank me,” he flipped your hood around so it wasn’t inside-out. “Friends, right?”
“Right,” you nodded. “I’ll get going now.”
You waved to Bang Chan and started on your way home, feeling much better than what you had felt earlier this evening. The journey home didn’t feel as dangerous as before now that your mood was lifted. The looming worry of facing Manager Kim eventually was still in the back of your mind, but you pushed the thought away as best as you could.
The train ride was soon over, and your walk home was very quick as well. Everything seemed to go so smoothly when you were confronted with imminent danger. You quickly entered the passcode to your lock and safely got in your apartment. You put your bag down and looked over to your kitchen. I didn’t even eat dinner yet.
It was already so late, but all you had in your kitchen were eggs and ramen. It wasn’t healthy, but it was something. You reminded yourself for the second time since yesterday to go grocery shopping. Maybe on the weekend.
You were busy cooking your ramen when you received a text on your phone. Looking over the counter, you read the text.
Bang Chan: Did you get home safe?
You typed a reply.
Y/n: Yup ^^ making ramen right now
Bang Chan: Ramen? I’m jealous TT
Bang Chan: I’m on a diet but when I’m off I’ll eat 5 packs of ramen everyday
You giggled at the text and typed a reply. Then he replied. Then you did, then he did again. Your back and forth went on for the rest of the night, even as you ate your ramen and brushed your teeth, only ending as you fell into a deep slumber.
The next day was an important one for you. Amongst all the other tasks you had given to you, you were to hand in the notes that you’ve been taking from others. This was especially nerve wracking, however, as you were to also pitch Bang Chan’s idea to Manager Chen.
Before you left, you remembered to bring Bang Chan’s hoodie. You quickly folded and stuffed it in a random bag. On your way to the office, you couldn’t help but feel it in the pit of your stomach. The anticipation of officially pitching ideas to your boss. Also, not to mention the possibility of running into Manager Kim again. You weren’t excited at the premise of that.
You decided to finish all your tasks before pitching all the ideas to Manager Chen. Plus, you wanted time to double check that you had all your notes together too. You straightened yourself at your desk, and with that, you started working.
It was tiring, but honest work. You worked hard today, only making time to take a lunch break. You found yourself smiling at your phone while eating your sandwich when you saw a picture of Bang Chan’s ‘diet lunch’ he sent to you. You took big bites of your food, happy that you didn’t need to diet.
Finally, after a long day of work, the time came to report to Manager Kim. You grabbed your notebook with both hands and slowly shuffled towards her office. Stopping in front of her door, you took a deep breath before knocking.
“Come in,” she said.
You opened the door, walked inside, and placed your notes on her desk. “Hello Manager Chen. I know this is too early to be giving you my notes, but somebody submitted a really promising idea.”
Manager Chen took your notebook to read through it, her hand on her chin. You listened to the ambient silence of the room. She was focused on your notes, nodding a few times as she flipped the pages. She cleared her throat, and you stared at her with wide eyes, giving her all your attention.
“You’re right. This content does look promising. It would be a bit rushed, but if we quickly start on it, we could produce it in time.” She gave you a look whilst handing your notebook back. “Type this up and make photocopies of it. This will be one of the main points of our Friday meeting tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Manager Chen.” You tried to keep a straight face when taking leave.
Hands clenched on your notebook, you briskly walked past all the cubicles over to the washroom. You tried to keep a straight face in front of your coworkers, but as soon as you entered the washroom, you couldn’t fight the smile on your face.
“Yes!” You whisper-yelled.
Your fingers immediately went to your phone to text Bang Chan, but you decided to hold onto that idea. It’ll be a surprise tomorrow, you thought. Instead, you chose to send a text to let him know that you had his hoodie.
Y/n: Are you in the building? I have your hoodie.
The reply was almost immediate.
Bang Chan: I stayed at the dorm today, you keep it for now haha
You assumed he was simply tired from all the work he had. There were probably multiple schedules and projects he had that were completely separate from the one you were working on. That is also probably why he works so late everyday. Not to mention being an idol was an all-day-everyday sort of career.
It didn’t take a long time to type up and print your notes. You finished your task by delivering the photocopies to Manager Chen’s mailbox, and since there was nothing else on your plate, you decided to head home.
On your way home, you reluctantly stopped by the parking lot building to look for your jacket. You asked the lot attendant and scoured through every corner of the lot. You had even tried to retrace your steps from yesterday, trying to block the memories of Manager Kim out on your search for your jacket. The search was thorough, but nothing came from it. That was a really cute jacket too, you sulked. Also, your lanyard was in the pocket of your jacket. You really did not want to apply for a replacement so early on in your time here.
You left the lot and left for the subway station, a little disappointed that a perfectly good jacket went missing. Although you knew it wasn’t your fault — and you certainly did not regret shrugging your jacket off to escape — it was still a shame that you lost it, now you had another thing to worry about.
At home, you had another ramen dinner along with some tea. Strangely, this was the only mundane night you’ve had since you started your job. You recounted your memories of the days prior. You cringed at your drunken activities from your first day and swore that you would never get drunk with strangers again. Tuesday wasn’t bad comparatively — it was the day you had coffee with Na-eun and Yoojin. And Bang Chan, of course. Yesterday was not a day you wanted to remember, although you did appreciate Bang Chan calming you down afterwards. He was a good friend.
Your night was slow. The majority of your time was spent mindlessly scrolling through social media, silently checking up on your friends back home. You also spent time texting Bang Chan. Somehow your conversations strayed from work-related over to movies, music, and everything in between. It was amazing how, despite being so busy, he still managed to stay positive. You admired that about him.
You started to get ready for bed. Before you went to sleep, you played scenarios of tomorrow’s meeting in your head, preparing yourself for what to say if anybody made you talk.
The next morning, you woke up bright and ready to go. It was the day of the long awaited meeting. That, plus it was Friday. You were nervous, but excited for today as this was the meeting where Bang Chan’s content idea could either be sent for production or tossed in the trash. All these thoughts were running loose around your head as you got ready to go to work. You dressed in your most expensive blouse and skirt whilst trying extra hard on your makeup.
You made sure to arrive at the conference room early so you had the option of choosing your seat this time. You weren’t about to take your chances like last time.
There were only a couple more people in the conference room who came early like you. You greeted them as you walked in, choosing to take a spot further away from them to avoid awkward interactions.
More people started to flow in as the meeting was getting closer to starting. You fiddled around with your pen, clicking it open and closed, when you noticed your friend come in. Bang Chan was again dressed in all black. He wore a beanie and a black hoodie that was almost identical to the one he gave you. He gave you a smile and a nod of the head before heading over to sit in the chair beside you.
“I had such a long morning,” he whispered as he placed a bottle of mango juice in front of you, “I love those kids, but sometimes…”
You mumbled a ‘thank you’ under your breath. “What happened?”
“One of them left a mess in the kitchen last night and didn’t bother to clean it,” Bang Chan rolled his eyes, “so I had to do it for them before leaving.”
“What are you, their father?” You giggled.
“More like their maid.” Bang Chan smirked.
The two of you kept up your small talk until you saw Manager Chen enter the conference room. A number of the employees, including you, greeted her. She returned your greetings and began the meeting. It seemed like Manager Kim wouldn’t be coming.
“Although this was meant to be a preliminary check up meeting, I want to bring up an idea that was submitted by one of our team members.” She started passing out the photocopies you made. “The idea was to film promotional content for our China project. Since the Mid-Autumn Festival is at the end of the month, if the majority of us agree to push forward with this, we should be able to plan, film, and produce this content in time.”
“Won’t we be short on time?” Somebody asked.
“I am confident that, if we rush the planning, we will have enough time for filming and production.” Manager Chen replied. “Now, what are some ideas that we have for this content?”
“We could turn making mooncakes into a competition,” you offered your idea. “They could spin it into something funny, plus, this competition could take up a lot of air time.”
Manager Chen nodded in response.
“We could go somewhere in the mountains to get a better shot of the moon,” somebody in production added. “We can also set up a lantern-making episode.”
The rest of the meeting consisted of even more brainstorming. Many ideas for the content were thrown out and you carefully listened to each one before making up your own opinion silently in your head.
Finally, it seemed like everyone’s brains were wrung dry as there were no more ideas being thrown out there.
“Now we can vote to either go ahead with this idea or scrap it. A show of hands for those who are in favour of this idea.” Manager Chen announced.
Hands went up. It was almost unanimous. You looked over at Bang Chan, eyebrows raised in surprise. He returned a similar look.
“Since the votes were overwhelmingly in favour of putting this idea into action, we will go ahead with the Mid-Autumn content.” Manager Chen looked over at the production members. “Our production crew will start planning right away, and hopefully, we can finish this project before the day of the festival.”
You were overjoyed. This is the first time you had say in a project like this. It was a nice feeling to be in a team and have your opinion valued.
Manager Chen ended the meeting soon after, and you said goodbye to Bang Chan, assuming he was busy for the rest of the day. You were also busy. You left the conference room and diligently started your tasks for the day.
At the end of the day, you were exhausted. The fact that it was a Friday afternoon just made you want to leave work even faster. As soon as it was time to leave, you rushed out of the office, not wanting to catch the afternoon rush hour.
The packed train ride felt so long as you just wanted to get home and rest. You soon arrived at your stop and hopped off before starting your walk to the apartment complex. The thought of jumping in your bed and doing nothing for the evening lingered in your head, making you walk just a bit faster. You hiked up the stairs, over to your door.
There was something placed in front of it.
It was your jacket. And it was completely ruined.
You slowly bent down, picking it up. It looked like somebody put a lighter over it. There were many burnt holes and tears on the jacket. Your heart rate sped up as you knit your eyebrows in confusion.
Standing up, you heard something fall out from your jacket.
It was your lanyard.
Drawn over your picture, in black sharpie, was a hoodie.
It was weird, yes, but what really made you feel nauseous were the two X’s drawn right where your eyes were.
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