#which is what motivated me to finally try and play the original

[cupids-carnival]

i actually Have More thoughts i’d like to add…. if you even care…………….. random facts & info abt this au below the cut! :D i actually thought about it more this time and even if it’s not fleshed out fully i hope u like it ^_^ i might even write a fic about this……. if my motivation will let me and you guys like it…………..

(for added context, this iteration of squid games works a little differently then the og one did, and the characters aren’t really meant to replace the original ones !!!!! :D also a teeny bit ooc but they’re in A Death gameso………….tbh i’m mostly saying that to cover up my plot holes but SHH!!!!!!!!!!!)

clown snuck a dagger inside of the games !!!!!!!! like sae-byeok did!!!!!!!! constantly wishes he had his sycthe back though

there’s also some other lifestealers there …….. ash & squiddo team up in the marbles game . take that as you will……..

evbo— like gi-hun— is really stubborn about his morals, believing most of the people in the games are good people and don’t deserve to be put in the games. but unlike gi-hun, he has no problem indirectly or directly killing people, like how he is parkour civ ! it doesn’t mean he doesn’t regret it / feel guilty about it, just that he doesn’t have a problem with it in the moment if it means he gets to survive and pursue his goals (ending the games/saving his friends, and other people)

the reason evbo is in debt is Because he impulsively Bought A Whole House. a nod to pvp evbo and the whole pvp mansion thing LOLL

evbo and emf ended up pairing together for the marbles game (emf ended up losing)

seawatt ended up betraying ally (ali reference) HARD in the marble games, basically manipulating them like sang-woo did and stole all their marbles. doesn’t really regret this, even if he’s a little guilty about it. willing to do anything to survive in the games

the reason seawatt & ally ended up in the games is basically a punishment, or a repaying of debt. they, both former guards, got in BIG trouble with the front man / evil champion, so they were basically forced to play the games as a form of punishment. seawatt was pretty confident the evil champion wouldn’t kill him— as he was a pretty high ranking guard, to the point he was almost like his right hand man, like in park civ— until he got Dangerously close to dying and got saved by evbo, which pushed him to join evbo’s group since evbo was already showing that he was willing to protect seawatt in some form (and also made him realize he wasn’t as protected as he thought he was). ally ended up joining evbo & seawatt since ally vaguely knew seawatt from the time they were gaurds & thought evbo as a good person, but also really naive.

the final three are clown, seawatt, and evbo.

clown takes sang-woo’s place in this, as he ends up killing an injured seawatt while evbo isn’t looking.

seawatt, while dying, does end up saying something along the lines of “for what it's worth, I was telling the truth when I said I enjoyed working with you” to evbo. evbo, despite already knowing of seawatt’s betrayal to him (due to him working w the evil champion) is wracked with guilt because of this. he still sometimes wonders if seawatt truly meant it even after the games were over! :D

instead of clown sacrificing himself for evbo though, or both of them choosing to end the games willingly, evbo is forced to kill clown as the other man was way too angry and filled with grief from having branzy— one of the only people he was genuinely close to in the games (and also may or may not be his first and last crush)— die, so there was no point to try to end things peacefully in clowns eyes. ofc, there’s other reasons- like clowns innate desire to win, the fact he had both his life on the line and money to win for him and his sister. evbo feels super guilty about this, because even if clown was an enemy for most of the games, he still saw how human clown was in the end; and that fact still keeps him up at night. esp in the marbles game, while he was still grief-stricken about emf, he saw how sad and vunerable clown was after branzy died (even if the other man never admitted it, and aggressively pushed evbo away when evbo tried to reach out). evbo can only hope that clown is happy w branzy in the afterlife!! :D

the reason why i wanted branzy to end up sacrificing himself for clown!!! it was to have a kaboodle cameo in there!!! :D clown ends (vaguely) mentioning his little sister, kaboodle, and branzy decided to willingly die because he knew clown would have a better usage of the money then branzy would, having a family to come back to (even if it was just a sister- still, branzy could see how much she meant to clown through how he’d speak abt her, even though he’d never met her personally!) when branzy had little to none. branzy ended up joining the games to pay off his debt, as with all the other people, but as his literal creditor was also in the games with him & the fact he ended up developing a genuine connection with the guy (to the point clown even offered to let go of his debt if they both made it out of there) left him with little reason to even use the money, so he decides to sacrifice himself! besides, clown is obviously destined for more, something great, right? and this money would surely push him to that fate:O

lastly, in clown and branzy’s last talk, branzy ends up half-jokingly mentioning running a casino together & getting married for tax benefits once they’re out of the games, which is the in-universe replacement for the whole jeju island & mojitos bit in the original squid games :D

now that i’ve rewatched squid games i’ve realized how much of a squid games au can work with all my favs…………………. slight squid games spoilers ahead!!!!!!! but also you need to watch squid games to like understand half of this lmfaooooo

squid games with evbo being the winner / “champion”, the front man being the evil, ex champion / winner, seawatt, one of evbos allies, secretly working w the gaurds / the front man, emf being evbos closest ally/friend, their entire friendship being born out of circumstances but them still being best friends anyway…. ally being someone who works with seawatt & the front man but telling evbo about seawatt anyway since they think he has a good shot of winning and doesn’t want too see him get betrayed… clown being one of evbos enemies and the parkour god being like 001 (the old man version lol) in which the cookie god tells evbo like. crucial information about the games

branzy in squid games lowkey being in debt with clown and being one of the most physically weak players (especially if lifestealers are also there) but clown protecting branzy anyway because he’s cute, but also because he’s really smart and strategic about these games— and branzy ends up accidentally saving clowns life like three times because he always comes up with a plan last minute,, clown relying on his physical strength for most games, but also being logical and calculated, which pushes him to team up with branzy because he can see the potential in him,, branzy is so confused because it looks like clown is fine on his own, with sharp thinking but also the strength to keep him safe, but clown ?? teams up with him anyway?? even when he knows branzy is in debt to him (judging based off of the vague threats clown says to him occasionally) AND THEN to add to it, branzy ends up betraying subz & vitalasy in an early game ( idk what his reasoning was though lmfao ) and then people urge clown to stay away from branzy because he’s a “known betrayer” but clown teaming up with him anyway… branzy ending up being extremely loyal to the very end, because they end up forming a genuine connection, which is the marbles game where they team up but end up being opponents………… branzy willingly gives up his life for clown ( ji-yeong style ) and clown is DEVASTATED

[henrikvanderhussy]

I tracked down .iso files for the original version of Secrets Can Kill, hoping I'd be able to play it, but not really expecting it to cooperate with my windows 11 computer

So imagine my surprise when....

I'm honestly pretty fucking shocked that it's working and I'm excited to get to play it for the first time!

(fingers crossed that nothing breaks when it's time to 'change disks')

[m3l0nfl0at]

just say yes - t. kuroo

kuroo tetsurou x f!reader ; fake dating to lovers, trigger warning: family problems which leads to a lot of degrading, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, flirty!kuroo x obtuse!fem reader, happy ending, 2000’s romance-esque vibe, y/n used a handful of times, heavy amount of pet names, a LOT of build-up, reader is lowkey weird girl coded (aka me), 13.2k words

summary: upon receiving an invitation to your sister’s wedding you decide to ask kuroo for a favor to be your fake date for the event. but what happens when your feelings for your fake date suddenly become real?

melon’s recommended melody: just say yes playlist

“I need you to do me a huge favor. Hear me out first, okay?” Kenma faces you in his chair even though his eyes were on his game. You inhale deeply, “I need you to attend a wedding with me and before you start saying no, I’ll do anything you want for a whole month”. Even though you knew Kenma could pay someone to do anything he wanted for him, you needed him to realize how desperate you were for him to attend this wedding with you. 

 While you look over to Kenma you’re holding your breath, your roommate was never consistent so you know him saying no was always a fifty percent possibility. Waiting for an immediate shutdown you’re instead granted with Kenma saying “Ok, when is this said wedding?” You start celebrating all too quickly because just as you tell him the dates, you’re met with an immediate dreadful silence. “Sorry, I have several business meetings that week but I think you can ask Kuroo. He did say he had vacation due to the off-season.” A flush creeps across your cheeks as you think about asking Kuroo. Knowing he’ll just tease you relentlessly for even asking him to fake a relationship with you. Kenma groans in annoyance at his game, snapping you out of your dazed contemplation, Kenma’s met with your pinched yet flushed expression.

 “You know better than anyone that I cannot ask Kuroo, Ken. Not only would I be betraying Alisa, but he plays around too much. I feel like I'm walking on eggshells trying not to get teased by him.” You huff sitting down while Kenma looks over at you with narrowed eyes finally taking his full attention off his game. “Just tell Alisa it’s a dire situation, I think she’ll understand why you so desperately need someone to attend with. She knows you wouldn’t voluntarily pick Kuroo for anything, even if he was the last person on earth.” You sigh letting your shoulders hang low knowing Kenma was right. Even though Kuroo was a smug bastard, he was your best option to come out of this wedding in one piece.

 Alisa immediately lets you in her apartment, noticing how you kept pacing around uneasily in the hall. Gaining the courage, you finally tell her your original plan to ask Kenma to come with you to your sister’s wedding until that ship sank quickly leaving you to a last resort. “So, you’re going to ask Kuroo to be your fake date because of your iffy relationship with your parents?” You quickly nod, lying flatly across Alisa’s bed. Looking up to see her supporting a sad sympathetic smile before she quickly follows up. “You know, I’m not his girlfriend right? You don’t need to ask me for permission to ask him out for pretend purposes. Besides, it's not like you have feelings for the guy.” 

 Pouting, you let out an elongated sigh conflicted because your gut was telling you instinctively, something didn’t feel right. “I know he’s not your boyfriend, not yet at least. Nonetheless knowing you like him it just feels icky not asking for permission. Plus, I don’t want to overstep any boundaries you may have. Or even worse, have you think I have any ulterior motives with him.” Alisa chuckles knowing that a major weight has now just been lifted off of your chest. Suddenly she pulls you into a bone-crushing hug, you both take a minute to bask in the comfortable silence until Alisa decides to break it.

 “I’m glad to have such a considerate friend like you, you don’t find too many people like that anymore.” 

You pick yourself up only to be mentally weighted down again, as a realization clicks that you’ve only solved half of your problem. Even though you got Alisa’s approval, you still hadn’t asked Kuroo, knowing he’ll be harder to persuade than Alisa. Massaging your temples you tell yourself to stop overthinking, for once giving Kuroo the benefit of the doubt. “Lis, how am I going to face Kuroo while I’m desperately begging for his help? He’s just going to ridicule me.” Alisa chuckles just as you start sulking for what feels like the tenth time today, picturing Kuroo’s annoyingly wide smirk.

 “Just ask him nicely like I do, he’s always super sweet to me. Doesn’t hurt to try?” You glance over at Alisa whose face is flushed all over while you make gagging noises. “Please stop, of course he’s going to be nice to you Lis, you’re an angel. For me, he just turns into a pestering tease who won’t give me a break. He can’t even have a normal conversation with me without poking fun.”Getting up you send Alisa a finger salute, taking off to go ask her rooster boyfriend to accompany you for the upcoming event. She then flashes you two thumbs up, sending you off in a nervous state. 

 Standing in front of Kuroo’s door with your head in your hands wondering what you’ll say to convince him to do this fake dating scheme. Fidgeting with your fingers, you finally look up to his door hesitatingly knocking twice, shocked to hear the chaotic rustling footsteps on the other side. Kuroo answers wearing a black fitted tank with some sweatpants signaling he just got home from the gym. As he leans on the doorframe, you suddenly take notice of his muscular build and just as you start to open your mouth to speak, nothing comes out. He notices you staring but decides to fill the silence feigning obliviousness. “Did Kenma forget something at my apartment again? No, I swore he came yesterday to get his Switch charger.” 

 You take a deep breath and close your eyes as you slowly start to whisper. “No, I actually came to talk to you. I need your help with something really important.” Kuroo lifts his brow and suddenly leans closer sporting his Gengar-like smirk. “I’m sorry but I actually can’t hear you, can you speak up sweetheart?” Your nose scrunches in disgust and suddenly you realize who you’re talking to. Not your roommate’s good-looking best friend but Alisa’s brash crush. Snapping out of whatever daze he had you in, you lean into him mimicking his stature feigning confidence. “I need you to be my date to my sister’s wedding next weekend. As a fake date of course…nothing real.” He takes notice of how you rush over your words and refuse to make eye contact with him but decides not to verbalize it, could be better blackmail material later he thinks to himself. 

 Kuroo leans on his door frame with an amused smile crossing his arms over his chest before puffing it to let out a chuckle. “Ok. I’ll do it.” You look at him with wide eyes shocked that he agreed so easily, shock soon turning into suspicion. “Why did you agree so easily, what do you get from this? Did Kenma pay you?” You step back raising an eyebrow only for Kuroo to lean towards you while pouting. He then reaches to take your hand holding it with sincerity. “Do you think that poorly of me sweetheart? I would never pass up an opportunity to date you, real or not.” He stares at you menacingly before you take your hand back to punch his shoulder. Making way into his apartment to land harshly on his couch, still wondering if he’s taking this seriously.

 “Ok for real, Kuroo will you help me or not?” He places a hand over his heart exaggeratedly taking a seat next to you. “I already said I would, what more do I have to do to let you know I have no hidden intentions?” You look at him straight on with narrowed eyes before muttering jokingly “I will never fully trust you, even if my life depended on it. Has anyone ever told you that you have the aura of a conman?” Kuroo looks at you as if he just faced the biggest heartbreak, dramatically placing a hand over his heart. “You know I have heard that before but coming from you sweetheart, that feels like a direct hit.”You roll your eyes knowing Kuroo is always one for dramatics. You start contemplating how this is actually going to work since Kuroo and Alisa both agreed. “What’s going on in your head princess?”Kuroo follows up by scooting closer to you and tapping his finger against your temple. “Tomorrow, meet me at the cafe down the street from Ken and I’s apartment. We can go over the plan and most importantly boundaries.” you say as you scoot back from Kuroo only to be met with the arm of his couch. 

 Letting out all the tension in your body, you allow yourself to relax while walking back to your apartment. Filled with relief that you found someone to willingly help you get your mother off your back. Especially since that someone was as picture perfect as Kuroo was, he was the trophy boyfriend that every parent would want you to bring home. Kuroo was smart, athletic, determined, and very charming. You cross your arms snickering loudly, wait till your mother gets ahold of him, that’ll finally put an end to her constant nagging. 

 Entering your shared apartment you notice Kenma chatting with someone on the phone, tiptoeing to try and ignore Kenma from addressing the elephant in the room. “Hey, get back here. You can’t just ignore me! Tell me, what did Kuroo say?” Staring down at your feet in embarrassment you head over to Kenma who’s still on the phone. “He said yes right away, no questions asked.” Kenma wrinkles his brows “Then why do you look so…tense?”. You try avoiding eye contact with Kenma hoping that he would drop the conversation but Kenma was known to never give up. “I didn’t want to make it awkward, I just asked your best friend to fake date me for a weekend. You don’t find that weird at all? Plus, Kuroo seemed way too desperate for my liking, it freaked me out.”

 It wasn’t till you were done with your ramblings that you heard a boisterous laugh on the phone, automatically knowing whom it belonged to. “Kenma! Were you really on the phone with him this whole time? You twerp! It’s even more awkward now!” Kuroo continues laughing as your hands cover your hot face. “Princess, did you really just call me desperate when you were the one eyeing me as soon as I opened the door?” Kenma notices the flush intensify across your face but before he can say anything you interject. Stating that you were heading to your room not wishing to engage in any more of their pointless conversation.

Awakened by a blaring ringtone you answer even looking at your phone, only to be met with instant regret. “You’re going to the wedding right? Your sister expects you to be there, she said she was even making you a bridesmaid? You understand how big of a responsibility that is, especially at such a last minute-“ Your mother continues talking but your mind instantly shuts her out. Knowing you should be listening but not having the energy to put up with her this early in the morning. “Mom, look it’s early and I just woke up so do you think you could give me a minute before you start being belligerent with me.” 

 You hear your mother huff on the other side as if she just heard the most offensive comment ever made towards her. Unconsciously rolling your eyes as you answer her first couple of questions. “One, yes I’m going, I don’t intend to miss my sister’s big day. Two, I already gave her all the information to help her with the sizing for my bridesmaid dress.” you let out a big sigh “Did you have any other questions mom?”. Your mother smacks her lips, “No, but how come you talk to your sister and not me? Even on the family group chat you don’t talk? Are you being lazy these days, do you have nothing interesting to report on? I want to hear how you’re doing and you treat me like I'm not important, do you want a new mom?” 

 You get up from your bed holding the phone up to your cheek before you start pacing around the room. “Your sister told me you were bringing a plus one? Is that correct? Didn’t know you had it in you to get a boyfriend, especially after all these years. I mean your sister is already getting married and you’re barely getting into a relationship? Don’t you find that a bit odd?” She chuckles condescendingly while you start picking at your cuticles walking to the kitchen. “Well mother, as much as I would love to continue this interesting conversation, I actually have a meeting to attend so I’ll let you go. I’ll see you at the wedding.” 

 Your mom agrees before hanging up finally putting you out of your misery. You place your phone on the counter as you start rubbing your temples not noticing Kenma enter the kitchen. “Who was that? Is Kuroo bothering you already?” you chuckle at Kenma’s remark, as much as you didn’t like Kuroo’s endless teasing you sure wish it was him on the phone instead of your mother. 

 “No, it was actually my mother but it’s over now. That’s all that matters, she got her monthly call so lets hope she doesn’t call again. Now that you reminded me, I do have to text Kuroo, just to make sure he can make it today. Wish me luck with that.” You exit the kitchen not wanting to socialize right now, due to your mother draining your mental battery. Deciding that you should start getting ready to head out to meet with Kuroo.    

 Texting Kuroo you found that he was already on the way to the cafe just as you had finished getting ready. As you’re on your way to the cafe you feel drained due to never really regenerating mental stamina from your phone call with your mother. Walking on auto-pilot mode, you start thinking about how to approach this meeting with Kuroo without pushing your problems on him. Entering the cafe you see Kuroo tucked away in the corner, sitting in a cozy brown booth. As the scent of coffee hits your senses, you feel it replenishing your fatigue. 

 “Hey, I hope you don’t mind but I already paid for your drink. Don’t worry I made sure to ask Kenma for your cafe order.”. Maybe this meeting wouldn’t be as hard as you thought it would be. You start placing your bag in the booth to sit while Kuroo rests his head on his palm, “Are you okay? Not to be rude but you look like you had a rough morning. Usually when you see me you have this flush on your face and start to stutter nervously.”. He smirks but you stop him before he could go any farther “Thank you Kuroo for the treat but please just don’t do this”, you gesture at him, “today.” Then placing your head down on the table dissociating, feeling remorseful for snapping at him. 

 Kuroo tilts his head drawing his eyebrows together, knowing something serious must’ve happened for you to be this irritated. He then lifts a hand onto the table to catch your attention “I apologize, don’t feel guilty for telling me your limits. For today, I’ll set aside all my teasing. But seriously, are you okay princess? Talk to me, what happened? If you don’t want to talk about it then that’s fine too.”. He then reaches for his drink waiting patiently for you to speak. 

 Giving into the silence, you decide that bottling your feelings isn’t healthy for your friendship or  for you guys’ new found fake relationship. “I had a phone call today with my mother and let’s just say I’m glad you agreed to come with me because I don’t think I could’ve done this alone. Throughout the call she just kept talking about how my sister is living a great life while I’m barely getting mine started.” you didn’t notice it but you started picking at your cuticles again, Kuroo did notice. Placing his hand on top of yours as both of your eyes lock on eachother “I’m guessing that’s the reason you asked me to attend this wedding?” He lifts an eyebrow hoping to get a verbal answer from you but instead gets a nod.

 “Well then that’s why I’m here with you, you’re not facing her alone. I don’t know if this’ll make you feel any better but you guys just have different definitions of life goals. She thinks a major life goal is getting married, while you think otherwise, it’s not your fault she’s stuck in her own ideals and is trying to push them onto you. You’re a grown woman, she can love you as her daughter but I think you’re grown up enough to make your own standard bunny”. You start laughing, brushing off the ridiculous nickname and focusing on how he makes perfect sense of your mother’s logic without even having to meet her. Sneaking a quick glance at you, Kuroo mentions how he also had family problems with his parents as a child. “My family problems lead me to meeting Kenma, who is now my best friend. So, who knows what yours will do for you?” Kuroo nudges you with his elbow and you suddenly think inviting Kuroo to come with you wasn’t such a bad idea after all.

 After you and Kuroo’s chat about your mother, you decided going forth it wouldn’t be good for you to withhold your family problems from Kuroo, especially since he is going to experience your parents behavior firsthand. Still sitting in the cafe, you both collaborate to come up with ideas on how you guys both first met. “As much as I would love to tell my parents how we actually met, I’d rather come up with something more romantic.” you spoke sarcastically knowing how you and Kuroo originally met was an embarrassment. Kuroo laughs recalling the first time you actually met wanting to tease you but deciding not to pester you after the morning you’ve been having, “Well, if we make it too romantic it won’t be believable. How about we say we met through Kenma on a blind date and we hit it off after I saw how enchanting you were.”. 

 You roll your eyes, “You do know no one is here, right? You don’t have to add all the compliments yet, who are you trying to impress?”. Kuroo rolls his eyes playful, knowing how obtuse you are. He decides to move forward with the conversation and express his opinion on the situation. “I think it’s simple and effective. No one needs to hear that our eyes met and we instantly loved each other. If it's too romanticized then people won’t believe us or even worse, we won’t remember it.” Locking eyes with Kuroo you realize he is being unrealistically rational today, “Who are you and what did you do with Kuroo?” you raise a brow at him. He chuckles looking down at his hands bashfully before locking hands with yours to fully get his message across. “I don’t want to bother you with being playful, especially with the morning your mother gave you. I want you to know I'm taking this role seriously, no matter what happens on this trip, I’ll always be by your side.”.

 He then squeezes your hand letting you know his sincere remark wasn’t him joking around. “We should probably start leaving soon but can we meet again in say two days? You know, start picking up couple mannerisms and go over what feels right and what doesn’t? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable while trying to impress your family.” You agree with Kuroo knowing you won’t get comfortable with physical affection so quickly, “Sounds good, in two days we can meet at your apartment to practice mannerisms. Since I’d rather not give Kenma two front row seats to embarrass myself the show.” You and Kuroo laugh before exchanging glances while he smiles at you. “I’ll see you soon bunny, text me when you make it home.” Kuroo starts picking up both of your belongings before handing you your bag, so you can both start heading your separate ways. You looked back at Kuroo walking away, feeling better about your day. What you didn’t see was him looking back at you two times, it’s safe to say you both left the cafe with a new sense of realization that day.

Two days, it took you two days to come to terms with being physically affectionate to someone that wasn’t your sister or Alisa. The whole train ride to Kuroo’s apartment you wondered if you could just stay on the train until you ended up back home. As if Kuroo had a sixth sense, he soon texted asking if you guys were still on for later today? Your last meeting you both decided on being truthful and who were you to break that promise so early? Responding back to him you say how you’re nervous for today and that physical affection doesn’t really come easy to you. After you hit send you reminisce about how your father used to force you to hug him after every argument you guys had. Snapping out of your thoughts you see Kuroo responding not even a second later, “That’s okay. We don’t have to do it all in one go. We can take small steps or you can verbalize what you’re comfortable with and we can practice later. Remember, we’re in this together! :)”. 

 Relief washes over you as you once again realize that Kuroo might be a tease but he’s also a respectable person. Heading off the train and walking to Kuroo’s apartment, deciding to take the elevator up. A wave of nostalgia hits you, realizing last time you were here you asked him to be your fake date. The wave of nostalgia turns sour as you start to feel nervous again, you decide to calm yourself by doing some breathing exercises all the way to Kuroo’s door. As soon as you are met with Kuroo he stares at you grimacing, “Did you take the stairs, why are you breathing so heavily? You know there’s an elevator right?” You stop your breathing, “I didn’t take the stairs! I’m doing breathing exercises, you jerk. I’m sorry not all of us can be the cocky and confident Kuroo.” 

 Striding into his apartment as you both sit down on the couch. Kuroo being the first to break the awkward silence, “Well, did you think about what you were comfortable with trying on the train? I was thinking the most we would have to do is maybe holding hands and hugging. If anyone asks us about anything else we can just say we’re not big on PDA, it’s not like we have to explain ourselves anyway. I don’t want you to push your limits considering your mother is going to be draining your social battery. Does that make sense? Did it sound okay, you’re looking at me weirdly?” As you heard Kuroo carefully explain how he never wanted to push your boundaries or make you feel subjected to PDA, for once in your life you felt understood. Getting up from your side of the couch you inch closer to him before opening your arms awkwardly. Kuroo then wrapped his arms around you slowly, afraid you’ll pull away. Hugging Kuroo felt different from any other hugs you’ve experienced. 

 Your father’s hugs always felt coerced and demoralizing, you never thought hugging someone could feel so homely and natural. Still hugging Kuroo you decide to tell him the truth, “I never liked hugging, it always felt like a burden. My mom treated it as a chore, making me greet our family even though I hated them and even my father making me hug him after our terrible arguments. Anyway, hearing you talk right now about not wanting to push me into anything made me feel weirdly understood. Thank you Kuroo.” Kuroo smiles into your hair as he lets go of a breath he didn’t realize he was holding in, “You shouldn’t have to thank me for understanding boundaries but since you never thank me, I’ll take it.”

 Tapping his shoulder, Kuroo realizes the moment is over for you but his heart still feels aflutter. “You’re right though, I shouldn’t have to explain myself to people. These are our boundaries and they need to respect them!”, you puff out your chest proudly before realizing you never answered him. “Oh and to answer your question, I’m fine with you hugging me and us holding hands. Nothing beyond that please.” Kuroo nods still freaking out over your shared moment before diverting your attention somewhere else. 

 “That reminds me, a suit should be fine to wear right? Since you haven’t really said anything about the theme of the wedding, I kind of just assumed. If not then we might need to go shopping.” Embarrassed, realizing you never really told Kuroo about the details of the wedding. “Sorry, Kuroo I didn’t realize! A black suit should be fine, I mean black will go with my bridesmaids dress-“ he cuts you off “Wait, you’re a bridesmaid? You really are worried about your parents if you’re forgetting key details. Well, I’ll make sure to look my best for my bridesmaid.” You side eye him, knowing he’s partially right. You’re placing more value on getting this interaction with your parents finished than actually paying attention to your sister’s big day. “We should both start packing for the weekend, it’s about a couple hours away so make sure to get some rest so you don’t fall asleep on the road. I’ll see you in a couple of days Kuroo.” You start heading for the door but just as you’re about to reach for the knob Kuroo beats you to it and opens the door for you. “Would it be weird if I asked for a hug before you leave?” You side eye him, “Don’t push your luck Tetsu.”. “Alright, I’ll see you later sweetheart! Text me if you need anything.” 

    The days leading up to the wedding passed quickly, as if time wasn’t on your side. The morning Kuroo and you had to leave you felt exhausted, mentally and physically. You couldn’t sleep due to the ticking time bomb that was your sister’s wedding, usually you would have texted Kuroo your concerns but didn’t want to wake him since he was the designated driver. The next morning packed and ready to go, you receive a text from Kuroo that he’s downstairs before heading out. Deciding to say goodbye to your roommate, you gently tap on Kenma’s door, walking in to see him at his desk. “Kenma I’m leaving…unfortunately. I’ll see you Monday, call me if you need anything!”Kenma nods and just as you start walking away he decides to say “Oh (Y/N), make sure not to fall in love with Kuroo, okay?” You freeze and start nervously chuckling. 

 Brushing off Kenma’s comment to walk down to your ride, you realize the nervousness washes away as you see Kuroo opening his trunk for your luggage. You knew that as long as you had Kuroo with you, you’d be fine for the weekend. “Here, I opened the trunk for you but please be careful with my suit. Oh and I have something for you when we get in the car.” Placing your bag and dress in the trunk, you then start to get in the passenger's seat waiting to see what Kuroo got you. “So, yesterday I realized we had to raise the stakes a bit to make this more believable, so I bought you this.” He pulls out an ornate necklace that has a letter K on it, showing you proudly with a wide smile. “Kuroo, where did you get this? Oh my god, I’m going to be sick, this is too much for me to accept. Why did you buy this for just a weekend? Are you crazy?”.

 Kuroo cuts off your ramblings by placing a hand on yours, “You’re a bridesmaid, everyone’s going to be looking at you. I wanted to show them you’re mine, even if it’s for the weekend. Plus now it’ll be more realistic, if anyone asks we can say it was an anniversary present. Now, let's not puke in my car over a gift, if it makes you feel better I kept the receipt so when this is over I can return it okay?” You nod feeling relieved before turning around so he could put it on you. What you didn’t know was that the receipt was thrown in the trash long ago, nowhere to be found. As you turn around to show the necklace to Kuroo, you notice his flushed appearance before he’s asking permission to touch the necklace lying flatly on your neck. You agree, he carefully touches the K charm as you notice him staring at the necklace then glancing back up to you, making sure your eyes lock on each other for a moment. “Beautiful.” he speaks for a moment, suddenly clearing his throat looking away to face forward, “it’s beautiful.” you feel your face heating up but decide to look at the road to distract your mind.

 “Thank you Kuroo.” he flaps his hand, “It’s nothing princess.”, you scoff. “No really Kuroo, thank you. For the necklace, the past week, and for coming with me. Today when I came down to meet you I didn’t feel nervous at all, I think your presence makes me feel at ease and like I can face anything.” Kuroo takes a quick look at you to see you looking down with a flushed face before interlocking you guys’ hands together “That’s what I’m here for bunny. Now lay back, don’t think I didn’t see how exhausted you looked coming down. It’s going to be a long drive anyway.” You squeeze his hand before looking in his direction to send him a drowsy smile, dozing off.

Kuroo shakes you awake to tell you that you guys made it to the hotel successfully, you start to unbuckle yourself before Kuroo stops you. “Hey, before we get off I just want to say one thing,” he grabs your face with both of his hands “you better not forget that I’m here for you and only you. If at any time it gets too much let me know. Remember no hiding feelings.” You take his hands in yours to pull them off your face before nodding your head and getting out of Kuroo’s car. Kuroo takes that as a sign that your mental battery is already draining, opening the trunk letting you both grab your luggages. “Let me do all the talking at the hotel, you can stay by me just in case you run into your family.” Kuroo successfully gets checked in and you successfully watch him do that without encountering any of your family members. 

 As you both head up to your hotel room Kuroo notices you rubbing your eyes, “You still tired sweetheart? When we get to our room you can lay down, dinner isn’t till later anyway.”, you nod in agreement as you both walk towards your room. However entering the hotel room you felt like someone poured a bucket of ice cold water on you, immediately waking you up. Facing a singular king bed in the middle of the room,“Okay, well safe to say I’ll be taking the floor and you can take the bed princess. I’ll go ask the receptionist for another blanket, just lay down while I go run this trip real quick.”. Even though Kuroo told you to lay down you couldn’t help but feel guilt eating away at you, first you drag him to come to your family event, then you made him drive, and now you’re forcing him to sleep on the floor? 

 As you’re mentally debating with yourself, Kuroo soon enters the room to be met with you sitting down on the bed wide awake in a daze, “You don’t feel tired anymore bunny? Don’t tell me you want to switch because I’ll happily take the bed.”. Before you could speak Kuroo then abruptly jumped on the bed next to you smirking “ Kuroo! I was about to say I feel bad for you but you know what sleep on the floor.” You lay down turning over but Kuroo lays his head on your shoulder looking over at you pleadingly. You quickly look away, “Anyways before you rudely interrupted me, I was actually thinking that we could sleep together…on the same bed with some space.”. Kuroo smiles “Okay sweetheart, I’ll put the pillows in between us so that way you’re not uncomfortable.” Kuroo lifts himself off you to then start placing pillows in between you guys, “There you go, pillows placed and now I’ll set the alarm clock to 5:00 pm, so that way we’ll have time to get ready. Now, let’s sleep together on the same bed with some space!” Kuroo laughs, knowing he’s poking fun at you, you turn around huffing, deciding to ignore him and attempt to sleep before dinner. 

 Thirty minutes pass by and you hear Kuroo snoring, deciding that you aren't going to fall asleep anytime soon, you get up from the bed deciding to kill time by texting Kenma and Alisa. Only for you to realize that you left your phone in Kuroo’s car, getting up to retrieve Kuroo’s keys you start heading down. However, it seemed like the world was against you because as soon as you step off the elevator you’re met with your father talking to the hotel receptionist while your mother looks around. As you start to walk the opposite way, you hear none other than your mother’s shrill voice. “Honey, don’t be rude, say hi to us.” you lift your hand to wave but still stay silent “Well, where’s this plus one you were talking about with your sister? Wait, let me guess he canceled at the last minute or he couldn’t make it due to a cold?” You dig your nails into your palms “No mom, he is actually sleeping right now. I just came down to get my phone from his car.” Your mother looks you up and down suspiciously before your father interrupts her. “How forgetful of you, I thought I taught you better. First not properly greeting us and now forgetting your phone in your boy friends car?”. You cut him off before he could talk anymore about Kuroo, “No need for the space father, he’s my boyfriend.” 

 Both look at you stunned with your sudden imprudence, “Let’s hope this “boyfriend” of yours is very retentive seeing he’ll need to make up for your lack of memory. Nonetheless, I’ll let you get to it, be safe dear. We’ll see you at dinner.” Wasting no time to say any closing remarks you head off to your original destination, Kuroo’s car. As soon as you open the passengers side you see the phone that caused you so much trouble to retrieve. You pick it up and start heading back to the room not even caring about what you originally intended to do with it. As you open the door to your room, you make sure to close the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake Kuroo before moving to carefully sit onto the bed and find safety in your room. As you're slouchy sitting down, you realize you felt more exhausted than ever due to the overwhelming amount of thoughts in your head after your interaction with your mother, “What happened?”, Kuroo’s hoarse sleep-voice pauses every thought playing in your head. “I went down to your car to get my phone.” “Alone?” you nod your head slowly. “I don’t need you to say anything. I already paid for the consequences…I ran into my parents in the lobby and both think I’m making you up. Not only do they think that I’m incapable but they also think I'm aloof because I “forgot” to say hi to them properly.” 

 You know Kuroo is listening due to the lack of snoring but you can’t see him so you start picking up the pillow border to move them out of the way. As soon as you lift the final pillow you’re met with Kuroo’s face being scrunched due to intense concentration. “Kuroo, can you…”, his face softens. While you hesitate knowing that this is new territory you have yet to cross, “Can you hug me, even it’s just for a while.”. After you finish your sentence you look up to see Kuroo opening his arms up to you, you make your way up to Kuroo before seeking comfort in his warmth. Realizing you just needed him in this moment for nothing else around you to matter. Kuroo kisses the top of your head “Don’t worry sweetheart, we’ll show them at dinner just how real I am to make them regret their words.”

  Recharging your social battery by cuddling Kuroo was not something you expected to happen today but you guess desperate times call for desperate measures. After preparing to be a fake couple with Kuroo, it was now time to make it a convincing reality. At the start of the two weeks you would have thought it to be a challenge, getting along with Kuroo. Now walking hand in hand with him to the rehearsal dinner, you scoff at your past self. The instant you walk into the rehearsal dinner, you’re met with lingering gazes on you and Kuroo which is to be expected. I mean you really weren’t typically known for being in a relationship, especially with someone like Kuroo. Kuroo squeezes your hand before leaning down to whisper in your ear, “Remember we’re in this together.”. He then guides you to your seats, which are right next to your sister and her fiancé. 

Getting closer to your sister you feel alleviated knowing she wouldn’t pester you or bother Kuroo with offhanded questions like your parents likely would. “Hey little sis, long time no see.” your sister suddenly pulls you into a hug before pulling back and looking behind you, “Who is this little sis? He’s very handsome, I taught you well!For a moment I thought your plus one was going to be Kenma!”. Laughing along with her quietly you quickly feel Kuroo pull your arm softly, “This is Kuroo, he’s my boyfriend.” your hands suddenly feel clammy introducing Kuroo as your boyfriend but the moment  you shared soon turned sour. “Pinch me, I’m dreaming,” a harsh voice interrupts, “did I just hear her say boyfriend? My daughter finally has a boyfriend after all these years!”. Even though some might mistake your mothers tone of voice as excitement, you knew all too well she meant it backhandedly. 

 Kuroo locks your hands together again “I never get sick of hearing that come from her. She always gets so flustered, it’s adorable. Don’t you think so?” He looks over at you after speaking before pulling your hand up to his lips placing a quick kiss to the back of your hand, “I heard from my love here that you guys met earlier in the hotel? I apologize for my absence. I had been driving all morning, you know how tiring that is.” Kuroo says as your parents turn wide eyed knowing you told Kuroo about your bump in. Your sister interrupts to quickly greet your parents so she can leave to go greet her other guests, leaving an awkward silence. Your father stares at you and Kuroo before raising a brow in Kuroo’s direction, “Well Mr. Kuroo, since we didn’t have the pleasure of meeting this afternoon, care to tell me more about how you met my daughter?” Kuroo chuckles before you cut him off “Dad, let’s not do this right now please. It’s not my day, it’s my sisters.”, knowing he’ll take this as an opportunity to ask belligerent questions.

 Unfortunately your discomfort doesn’t stop his persistence. “Well, I’m just asking? Can't your father be a little curious about who his little girl is dating?” Kuroo rubs his thumb over your hand “She’s reserved, you know? Nothing bad about that, we don’t feel the need to flaunt our relationship. I will tell you this though, I remember when we first met like it was yesterday. My first impressions of her was that she was such a kind and vibrant soul.”. Kuroo gets interrupted by your father, “Yes, she gets her kindness from me, I’m so glad to have raised such a kind girl.”, you roll your eyes at your father,  knowing the facade he’s putting on for Kuroo. “When we met she had just moved in with Kenma, of course he needed help with moving boxes due to how much streaming equipment he has. Being the caring person she is, she decided to volunteer to help us. Even though Kenma and I could’ve done it ourselves, she’s persistent.” 

 Realizing he’s not sticking to the plan, he’s telling the story of how you guys actually met. “At the time, I didn’t know her but thought she was sweet because Kenma mentioned her to me a handful of times saying that she always helped him with technical issues and streaming ideas. However, as soon as we started moving boxes she and I both had accidently reached for the same box bumping our heads together. She was so red that you would think it was permanent and I couldn’t help but think how adorable she looked blushing violently. When she stood up, she stood so quickly that she ended up tumbling over more boxes behind her.”. Now Kuroo laughs, recalling how strangely captivating you were that day to him. However, for once it didn’t feel like he was laughing at you, which most people tend to do. “To this day, if you ask her how we met she’ll decline telling you. She thinks it’s embarrassing but if you were to ask me I would say that day she stumbled her way wholly into my heart.” Kuroo looks over to you still rubbing your hand, before you lean onto his shoulder smiling, you’re so going to kill him later. 

 Your mother coughs, “Isn’t that adorable? Speaking of Kenma, where is he honey? No offense to Mr. Kuroo here but I thought you’d be with him. You know, spread some generational wealth to our family like your sister.” Kuroo feels you freeze. “What does Kuroo here even do? If you don't mind me asking?” your father asks before staring at Kuroo, his eyes widen at your fathers thoughtless remarks. Even though you’d allow your parents to walk all over you, you would never let them do that to Kuroo. “Does it matter what his profession is, dad? He makes me happy and that’s all that should matter to you. You know, I’ve put up with you for a long time demeaning me but I will not let you sit here and demean my boyfriend. Now, if you excuse me, I’m going to go head to the ladies room.” 

 Just as you get to the hallway, you feel someone grab your hand, only to be met with your father. “I’m sorry if your mother and I offended you but you cannot act like this at your sister's dinner. It’s your sister's moment and you’re acting like a brat, I raised you better than that.” You look at your father in disbelief, feeling anger blooming within your chest, wanting to lash out and create a scene but not wanting to give him the satisfaction. “Excuse me, I need a moment to speak with my girlfriend please.” You and your father look to see Kuroo behind you guys, “If I were you, I’d talk some real sense into her. She should be ashamed of herself, creating such a spectacle at her own sister’s rehearsal dinner. Now you understand why she’s been single for so long, acting like a little girl.” Kuroo blocks out what your father is saying to see you clenching your fists so hard that your hands are losing color, looking up at your glossy eyes to see them devoid of any life and replaced with dullness. 

 “I’ve heard enough, sir. Give us a moment.” Kuroo snaps at your father making him leave swiftly as he glances back at you scoffing in disappointment. As soon as he leaves Kuroo gives you the keys to his car, telling you to go while he explains to your sister that you’ll both be leaving for the night. While handing you his keys he sees the nail marks imprinted harshly on your palms making note to care for those later. “Tell my sister I’m so sorry, please.” Kuroo angled his head downward to see you holding the keys tightly while trying not to cry, expressing your apologies to your sister. “I’ll let her know bunny, now go quickly.” Kuroo walked you to the door so that way you had no chance running into your parents, making sure that what just happened never happens again.

 “Hey, what’s up Kuroo? Did something happen?” Kuroo sends your sister a sympathetic smile. “Your sister and I are leaving a little early tonight. She’s not feeling too well but she sends her deepest regards.” Your sister sends Kuroo a knowing look, “Tell her that I'm not mad at her. I know our parents can be…crazy and that’s putting it lightly, if she needed to get away that’s fine. Actually, thank you for being with her tonight, Kuroo. Now, I think she needs you more than ever.” Your sister then waves off Kuroo. Heading to you, he sees you in the car messing with your hands guiltily. “She wasn’t upset with you bunny. She empathized with you, saying she knew how your parents could be.” That helped you breathe clearer, lifting some heavy weight off your chest, feeling safe and sound in this moment with Kuroo.

 Entering your hotel room, Kuroo takes your hand in his and guides you to sit down on the bed. Giving you some much needed space, shortly leaving the room to change. Alone with your thoughts, you think how bad things would be if Kuroo wasn’t here. Yet him getting belittled because he was associated with you was where you drew the line. How much farther could your parents go before Kuroo’s mental state starts slowly chipping away too. Cursing yourself for even letting your parents get a rise out of you infront of Kuroo, body heavy with disappointment. Now feeling embarrassment crash over you, wanting nothing more to shed the skin of your actions today and get out of this tight dress. You go to grab a wire hanger hoping that you could take off this dress the same way you put it on. 

 Kuroo walks out of the bathroom dressed in his pajamas to see you fishing the zipper on your dress with a hanger, “Sweetheart? You know you could’ve just asked me to unzip it for you right?”, you turn around stumbling back. “Kuroo, you scared the crap out of me! Don’t do that again.”, you place a hand on your chest before turning back around, “Then can you just unzip it for me please?”. Kuroo’s eyes bulge out of his head, shaking his head wanting to clear his thoughts, “Sure, don’t have to ask me twice princess.”. As Kuroo closely approaches, you start moving your hair to your left shoulder, Kuroo successfully unzips your dress then proceeds to press a light kiss to your shoulder. “I’m sorry about today sweetheart, I should’ve gone after you but your father beat me to it. To be honest with you, their words kind of shocked me.”. 

 He hugs you from behind, laying his head on your shoulder, his hands softly placed on your waist, “I never once felt insecure about my job but hearing them bring it up like I was some peasant not worthy of you, made me question myself…I thought if this is how I feel from one comment, then you must feel awful dealing with this your whole life. I’m so sorry bunny.” Listening to Kuroo you couldn’t help but feel emotional, knowing how emotionally burnt out you are just from one day with them. Kuroo sensed something was off as soon as he saw your shoulders sag, “Princess? Are you okay?”. Deciding to swallow your pride you turn to face Kuroo. Crying blurred some of your vision but the look of concern on his face still came through for you. Feeling undeserving of any kind of empathy, “Kuroo, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked you here, I didn’t know they would go this far. It’s all my fault for dragging you into this.” 

 Kuroo grabs your hands while stepping back shocked to see your weeping face, “My love…no, it’s not your fault! If I didn’t come and heard you over Kenma’s phone crying I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself. I would’ve drove all the way over here just to come get you bunny. Even if you didn’t want to come with me. I would’ve thrown you over my shoulder and forced you back home.” You weakly laugh picturing Kuroo angrily driving for two hours just to come get you. He turns over your palms to see the indents of your nails still there as he caresses the marks, “Go get changed princess, you had a long day.”. Agreeing, you head to the bathroom before changing and getting rid of every bad memory that happened today. When you return you’re met with Kuroo on the phone speaking to someone, laying down next to him on your shared bed just to decompress. “Yeah, thanks for your help. I’ll tell her to call you tomorrow. Bye Kenma.” You look over at Kuroo, “What were you guys talking about?” Kuroo pulls you into his chest. 

 “Nothing, just asking him for some advice.” He starts pulling your palms up to his lips before giving them soft kisses, you pull back scrunching in disgust, “Don’t, my palms are going to be all clammy.”. He grins, grabbing you to tightly hug, “You’re very strong for enduring that your whole life, my strong bunny.” he pets your head. “Tomorrow will be better, I promise. Let’s go to sleep, we have a long day ahead of us.”

You woke up lying next to Kuroo the following day, seeing the sunlight peek through the blinds behind him. Illuminating him beautifully, you run your hands across his face softly. “Good morning princess.” You stop your hand after seeing Kuroo stare at you, “Morning, Tetsu.”. Truth be told, Kuroo was awake before you but didn’t want to get up, longing in the feeling that was waking up next to you. You get up and stretch, making sure to tell Kuroo your busy schedule today. “Let’s go drop you off, my beautiful bridesmaid.”, you roll your eyes at his remark. Starting to head off to the venue to meet with your sister and her other bridesmaids.               

 “Text me if you need anything, I’ll let you know when I'm heading over here, okay?” Kuroo looks at you one more time as if this is the last time he’s going to see you. “I’ll be away from you for only a couple of hours, drama queen.” Before getting off you peck Kuroo on the cheek and head into the venue. It wasn’t till you got into the venue you realized the severity of your actions, embarrassed but immediately receiving a text from Kuroo. “Goodbye to you too sweetheart x”

 Spending the first half of your day getting dolled up to be in your sister’s wedding was chaotic. When Kuroo texted you he was on his way to the venue you knew it was almost showtime. “You look beautiful. I’m so happy for you.” You look behind you to see your sister, “I could say the same thing to you, it’s the fairytale wedding you’ve always dreamed for. It’s your big day.”. You both hug before being interrupted by the photographers letting you know that it was time to take pictures. “Who knows maybe next time I’ll be the bridesmaid to you and Kuroo’s wedding.”, she playfully nudges you before heading to the photographer. “What!”

 As you’re taking pictures you see your mother, she calls you and your sister wanting to take a picture with you both. You make sure that you put on a good fake smile even though you didn’t forgive her or your father for yesterday. Wrapping up the pictures, your mother pulls you aside. “Well, look who it is? You know, your father and I were very upset that you left so rudely.”, realizing that you’ve done this for far too long you stand your ground. “Mother, I appreciate all you’ve done for me in my life but I’m not going to accept this anymore. First you verbally break me down but now you’re attempting to take down my boyfriend with me? How far are you willing to go before you realize this act is pathetic. After this wedding, you cut all contact with me. Unless it’s an emergency or you’d like to apologize for your behavior, don’t bother. Now, if you don’t mind I’m going to walk back in there and put on a smile like a mature woman, you should do that too. Not for me but for her.”. You point to your sister before walking back inside, only thinking of Kuroo yesterday telling you how strong you were. 

 Hearing the quartet start to play the music, you realized the time has come. Your sister is finally getting her big beautiful moment. Marching down the aisle you head over to the spot your sister assigned you looking around afterwards. Spotting Kuroo he smirks, shyly waving to you. You look down, trying to lessen your smiling afterwards looking right back up. Kuroo catches your attention again before you see him mouthing that you look breathtaking. At this moment everyone disappears and it’s just you and him, your heart speeds up. Lost in each other's gaze you hear the quartet stop signaling your sister's arrival, you look at her and can only think of how beautiful she looks but Kuroo’s gaze never left you. 

 At the very moment, your sister got down the aisle you couldn’t help but feel tears fill your eyes. The preacher starts his speech while you look over at Kuroo. “Love is patient, love is kind.” Kuroo’s smile reaches his eyes, you feel a flutter in your stomach. “It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Keeping eye contact, your heart stops, the flutter in your stomach feels like it’s going feral, and your hands are clammy. Kuroo is the only person to have ever made you feel that way, safe and hopeful. Kuroo is the most kind individual you knew and was always patient with you, you feel your knees get weak. Do you like Kuroo?

  Your thoughts get cut off by everyone clapping at your sister and her fiance, you slowly start clapping, joining her other bridesmaids. Watching the newlywed couple start walking down together, people follow as you stay behind going crazy. You can’t like Kuroo but you still have to put on an act with him to shut your parents up. Kuroo and you being the only ones left in the venue he comes up to you taking your hand in his. “Shall we go to the reception my lady?”, Kuroo playfully bows in your direction. You chuckle before interlocking your arms together, “We shall.”.

 Arriving at the reception Kuroo feels that something with you is off, your eyes were always avoiding him and when he tries to hold your hand you flinch away. “Hey bunny, are you ok?”, you jump at the feeling of Kuroo’s breath near your ear, “Yeah, I’m totally fine. Just on edge because of family and what not”. Making up a fake lie was all you could do in this situation, feeling guilty for breaking you and Kuroo’s pact to not keep anything from each other. Kuroo gets up, your eyes follow him, “Well in that case, then let’s go dance.”. Your hands feel clammy as Kuroo offers his hands to you, waving yours back in rejection. “Ah no, I don’t know how to dance.”, Kuroo smiles in retaliation, “Then I’ll teach you, it’s not that hard anyway sweetheart.”. He grabs your hand lifting you in one go while dragging you to the dance floor.

 Kuroo places his hand on your waist and the other interlocking with yours, following you interlock hands and place the other on his shoulder. Looking down at his feet making sure to not step on them, Kuroo lifts your face up to him. “Don’t focus on your feet princess, keep your eyes on me.”, you nod mesmerized by him. He starts leading, swaying slowly back and forth, “See it’s easy, sweetheart. It’s just you and me here bunny, only focus on me.” , fascinated by Kuroo. He was right, in that moment it was just you and him. Every worry vanished, you didn’t notice your parents looking at you two or your aunts gossiping about you, it was just Kuroo helping you sway to the music. “I mean what I said earlier by the way, you look beautiful princess. I mean don’t get me wrong, you look gorgeous everyday but today bunny. You just have this fascinating glow to you. It’s like I can’t take my eyes off of you, you’re so captivating.” Your palms start sweating, hearing the music stop you break away from Kuroo abruptly. “Sorry, thank you for the dance Kuroo.”, wiping your sweaty palms you start to head back to your table feeling dizzy. Not realizing your parents sat themselves at your table, sitting down trying to look for Kuroo in the crowd. 

 Finally finding him near the refreshments, letting out a breath of relief. “So, got anything to say about yesterday young lady?” you freeze just barely noticing your parents at your table. You start to turn around feeling the fear comeback into you facing your father. “No, actually I have nothing to say and I’d prefer if we don’t talk about this here.”, trying to be the mature person in this situation. Your dad crosses his arms, “It’s just like you to walk away, you know you talked a big game to your mother but now you have nothing to say to me?”. Feeling your throat burn you start to pick at your fingers starting to speak before getting interrupted.

 “No matter what title you have to her, that doesn’t allow you to speak to her that way? A father should never speak to their daughter that way. Instead of trying to celebrate your other daughter’s beautiful wedding, here you are trying to make it about yourself. Excuse us, we're going to go ahead and sit somewhere else.” Kuroo places your drinks down before grabbing your hands and guiding you to another table. “I’m sorry bunny, I went to go get refreshments for us cause you seemed flushed after dancing but trouble seems to follow you anywhere you, huh?”, Kuroo tries lightening the mood but you still feel frozen by the tone your father displayed. Noticing how you weren’t letting up he decided to pull you away from the party entirely, gently caressing your face. “Sweetheart, look at me.”, he slowly starts swaying you just like before. 

 Laying your head on his shoulder you start swaying hearing music faintly playing in the background, “It’s just us remember. I’m here now.”. Kuroo’s lips gently graze your forehead as your vision feels blurry and you feel hot tears welling up. “Kuroo, can we go back to the hotel?”, he nods as you pull him to his car, not wanting to spend another minute near your parents. Driving to the hotel looking at the window you realized, your parents sucked at wanting to be parents. Being their daughter you always tried to make excuses for them but seeing how they treated Kuroo, it finally clicked for you that your relationship with them wasn’t worth the mental gymnastics. “Kuroo, do you talk to your parents?” Kuroo nods, feeling bad for not being able to provide the answer you wanted. “I do, I’m not going to lie to you though our relationship isn’t perfect but it’s not borderline damaging like your relationship with your parents. No offense.” You laugh, “No offense taken, It’s just sad to me that my parents don’t really feel like my parents. I can’t justify our relationship anymore, especially after everything they put you through. I just have to accept that my parents are not willing to change. Man, I need a drink after the day I’ve had.”

Heading out to the hotel bar, you and Kuroo decide to hangout before heading up to you guys’ hotel. Just getting a soda to drink, prematurely deciding that anything alcoholic will mess up your mental state even more. “Thank you Kuroo. We did it! The weekend is over!” You cheer with Kuroo before taking a sip of your drink. “This weekend was rough but you made it easier.” Kuroo leans on the bar smiling, picking at the tab on his soda can, “Well sweetheart, with you by me anything is easy.”. Suddenly feeling daring, you lean forward deciding to tease Kuroo the way he teases you, “Are you saying I’m easy Tetsu? That’s so mean of you to say to a girl who’s already down.”. Kuroo laughs leaning into you, “Bunny, we both know you’re anything but easy, more like troublesome.”  

 Kuroo leans down playing with the K charm on your necklace that lays on top of the nape of your neck as his gaze travels up to your face. Your breath hitches, knowing that your conversation just took a left turn, “Your friends wouldn’t describe you as troublesome, no?”. You shake your head, “Then what does that make me bunny?” You feel your heart pounding in your chest, “Tell me then sweetheart, tell me you want to be with me and I’ll drop everything to be with you. I’ve been telling you, "It was always you”, only you bunny.” Kuroo is only centimeters away from your parting lips. You feel his eyes locked on yours while your breath quickens, his fragrant musky cologne overtakes all your senses, and even though your desire to touch his lips with yours is strong, you hesitate.

“This is a mistake.” You whisper before pulling away abruptly, his fingers accidentally breaking the chain he bought you. You knew Alisa wanted him and what kind of friend would you be to take that from her, what kind of friend are you to even joke around like that? Deciding to pull away from Kuroo meant keeping your friendship with Alisa, knowing that she’d be heartbroken if she even knew you had any sort of feelings for Kuroo. “You’re right, this was.” Kuroo’s warmth is now gone and replaced with an ice-cold wall of rejection. He pulls away shaking his head and avoiding your eyes, “I’m heading back to our hotel room, since it’s the last night I think I’ll just take the floor.”, you sit up knowing you shouldn’t leave Kuroo alone but fearing what will happen if you convince him to stay. 

 Quickly contemplating the options in your head but your feet feel glued to the floor and a deafening silence hits your ears. You felt naive for allowing yourself to have feelings for Kuroo knowing he was never yours, you felt numb to the outside world. How could you do this to him, you hurt the only person who stuck out their neck to protect you. Not only did you hurt him but you also hurt Alisa, you felt like a terrible person. Not realizing you were in public till you heard people laughing near you, you felt heavy with negative thoughts consuming you. You quickly fix yourself before heading up to your hotel room. 

 Approaching the hotel room, you are met with light peeking out from under the door in the hotel hallway. Your chest felt like it was on fire, how could you go in there and act like everything was fine? You wished you could just start everything over from the beginning and profusely beg Kenma to come with you instead, never even considering asking Kuroo. Maybe even ignoring the invitation altogether and telling your sister you came down with some terrible food poisoning. Mid thought, the door abruptly opens but you can’t even tell because your slouched figure is on the nearest wall covering your face deep in thought. Kuroo stands still thinking about his next actions before shakily telling you that he’ll see you in the morning to drop you off at your apartment. You nodded, still stuffing your face in your hands because your throat felt too heavy to talk and you felt too ashamed to show your face. 

 Kuroo lingered longer than he expected wanting to hear you explain yourself but nothing progressed. Instead of saying anything, you finally let your hands fall to your side to be met with a blurry version of Kuroo’s silhouette. Just as you’re about to enter your shared hotel room, Kuroo suddenly grabs at your forearm. You stop becoming speechless at his actions wanting to grasp onto any words that’ll escape your mouth only to be met with nothing. He instead takes a deep shaky breath before speaking. “If you need me for anything just text me, I’m going for a drive. I’m not mad at you… I just need some time.” You didn’t face him still looking forward as you nodded before retracting your hand and heading in. Hearing the door shut in place, you sit down on the edge of the bed taking shelter in your arms. Conflicted about what to do with yourself now that you were truly alone. You did the only thing that felt right in this moment, cry, because deep down you know it’s over. Whatever chance you had at an actual friendship with Kuroo is over. The wedding being over was no longer a relief because you knew trouble was just going to follow. 

 Feeling the burden of having to explain yourself to Kenma, who would most likely be mad at you for stupidly developing feelings for his best friend and Alisa, who probably wouldn’t want to be your friend knowing you're disloyal to her. Laying down you grab the blanket and pull it up over your head, shutting out the world. However, the blanket could never replace the amount of comfort Kuroo would provide you and you only have yourself to blame for that.

 The next morning you’re met with Kuroo packing up his belongings, “Morning.”. His voice devoid of any  playful emotion and missing the stupid pet names he calls you, your heart breaks. You lift yourself up before heading to the bathroom to take off all of yesterday’s remains. As you slip everything off you feel yourself remembering how good the day started just for it to end rotten. Washing your face, you hoped you would wake up and maybe this would all just go away like a bad dream but sadly it wasn’t. Facing the consequences of your actions you decide to go back out there. Packing your things away you feel your phone ring, deciding to silence it before seeing it was Kenma spam calling you. Looking around seeing Kuroo immersed in packing you decide to put your phone on do not disturb. “You ready?”, you turn around to see Kuroo packed, “Yeah.”. Picking up your things before heading out the hotel, this was going to be a long drive.

After your awkward drive with Kuroo, you knew exactly where he would be going and exactly where you couldn’t go. Knowing he’d end up venting to Kenma, you go where you knew Kuroo wouldn’t be. That’s how you end up knocking quietly on Alisa’s door in the early morning. She opens up to see your sunken and tired expression as you fall straight to the floor begging for forgiveness. Her eyes widened, “What happened, what did your family do to you and where’s Kuroo? How come he didn’t come up with you knowing you’re in this state, I’m going to kill him.” You silently look up to Alisa before covering your sobs with your hand and saying sorry. She looks down at you confused, while her brows furrow in concern. 

 “What are you saying sorry for honey? Are you ok, come in and tell me what happened.” Alisa pulled you into her apartment, you sat in silence waiting patiently to get yourself together before saying your explanation on the weekend and why you suddenly came to her declaring for forgiveness. Deciding to cut to the chase you close your eyes before explaining everything, “Kuroo tried to kiss me Lis and I pulled back because I didn’t have it in me. He’s yours, Lis. However, I would be lying to you If I said I didn’t have feelings for him and I’m so sorry.” Alisa stares blankly into space, “He tried to kiss you?”, you nod. “Alisa, what kind of friend would I be if I kissed him back and didn’t let you have a chance? I couldn’t live with myself If I took this opportunity from you.” Alisa chuckles and looks at me like you’ve overlooked key details.

 “You are so beautiful but yet so dense. What kind of friend would I be if I denied you an opportunity to be with someone who likes you? Answer me, do you like him?”. You looked at her then looked away afraid this would blow up in your face. “I guess? Maybe? I don’t know! When we started this I thought he was annoying but now he’s less annoying?”, not knowing what else to say about him without hurting her feelings. “Do you remember what I told you the day you came to ask me for permission to fake date him?”, you nod. “Well then, you should know that Kuroo is in fact not mine. Yes, I liked Kuroo but I now know he doesn’t feel the same way about me. However, I do know that he feels that way about you, so what are you going to do about it?”. 

 Your stomach felt like it was in knots, did you like Kuroo that much you were willing to take him away from Alisa? How do you know when you like someone? Was wanting to kiss him at the hotel an instinct or a moment of weakness? Thinking back to the weekend you realized just how much Kuroo influenced you, how his compliments started to linger on your mind for longer, or how you suddenly turned into a mess each time he engaged in physical contact with you. Holy crap, you liked Kuroo. Oh no, you liked Kuroo. You look up at Alisa who gives you a knowing look, “Go get him girl!”. Even though you wanted to make a big dramatic escape to Kuroo you knew it just wasn’t that simple, you dropped your head.

 Alisa looks at you questioningly, she thinks you didn’t hear her so she raises her voice a little. “Hello, I said go get him… why are you hesitating?” Your sigh fills the room, you don’t know what to say, you don’t know if there’s anything left to say. “I messed up badly, what am I supposed to say? Hey Kuroo, I know I said almost kissing you was a mistake but now I suddenly realized I like you. Kuroo doesn’t deserve backpedaling. Plus, we didn’t talk the whole way home! What do you think that means? I hate you.“ Alisa cuts you off before you can talk for another 30 minutes. “Look, if he really liked you he wouldn’t be over you in the span of a day! I’ll give you two days here before I drag you to his apartment myself. So get yourself mentally prepared to talk to him, okay?”

 I’m heading home, is what you text Kenma before putting your phone on, do not disturb, not wanting to hear him nag at you for avoiding him. It takes you a while to pick up all your belongings due to your hesitance. Alisa notices, “Ok, I’m about to start throwing all your stuff in your bag. I told you two days, not two decades, what’s taking you so long to pack? Didn’t you already tell Kenma that you were on your way?” Alisa glances over at you slumped on her bed. “I’m just mentally getting ready for Kenma to get upset at me, you know how territorial he is when it comes to Kuroo. On top of that, he’s scary when he’s mad. Usually people yell and argue but Ken just gets silent and stares at you disappointedly.” As soon as Alisa starts laughing you both hear a knock on her door. Glancing at each other, deciding to tiptoe to the door. She glances out the peephole to see Kuroo, gasping she whispers to go to her room. You signal an ok as you quietly but quickly make a run to her room.

 She opens the door to see Kuroo in a distressed looking state, “Hey Kuroo, what’s up?”. “Alisa I need your help, I know (y/n) was just here but how was she before she took off? Was she upset, did she mention being upset at me?”, Alisa had never seen Kuroo like this. Even in high school when he played big tournaments he always stayed peaceful. She quickly thought how he must really like you if you have him this distressed. You were listening to Kuroo ramble from Lis’ room and for once you felt like you were listening to yourself speak. “She’s actually still here, she hasn’t left yet.”, your heart drops, “Come on out! I’ll leave you guys to it, let me know when this is all over.” With that you hear the door click and footsteps heading towards Lis’ room.

 “Hello, anyone there?” Kuroo stops right in front of Alisa’s door before knocking softly, “I know you’re in there. Can you please open the door? I want to talk.” You hear Kuroo’s breath falter waiting for your response before you open the door letting him in. You guys look at each other before breaking the silence, “I’m sorry I didn’t reach out Kuroo, I didn’t want to seem pushy. Especially if you felt that you needed more time.”. Kuroo laughs bitterly, “Do you ever intend to put yourself first?”. You felt your heart stop, “Excuse me?”, you didn’t know if this was a fever dream or if Kuroo was really trying to reprimand you. “Kenma filled me in, he told me why he thinks you didn’t kiss me back. I want you to tell me the truth, is it because of Alisa’s feelings or is it because you don’t like me?”

 Kuroo knows the answer but he wants to hear you say it. Kuroo grabs your fidgeting hands, “Please bunny, tell me. If you don’t like me I’ll walk away, never bother you again. If you do like me then I need to hear it from you.”. He hears you take a deep breath, anticipation building up in him. “I didn’t want to hurt Alisa. Even if I did like you, knowing I would betray Alisa would hurt me more. I’m sorry but I need you to understand that.”, a silence looms over you two. “What about what you wanted? What about what Alisa would want for you?”Kuroo has you thinking about what you wanted for once but not being selfish enough to take it. 

 You stare at your hands interlocking, “You aren’t supposed to be with someone like me. The weekend we shared validated that answer, whether it be my parents dragging me down or even my own expectations limiting me. If you’re associated with me, I fear that I’ll just bring you down. Alisa has a beautiful family, a great job, and everything you need to live a happy life. I don’t deserve you.”, Kuroo’s heart shatters with each dig you throw at yourself. “Sweetheart, look at me.” You stare at Kuroo seeing that his eyes are watering, “Ever since you clumsily stumbled into my life you have possessed every single one of my thoughts, I wasn’t lying to you.” He places his face near yours.

 “I know that asking to be with you, is asking for all of you, all of your family troubles, your bad days, and even your nagging roommate.”, you chuckle, now tearing up with him. “That also means I get quiet mornings waking up next to you, being able to come home to you after a long day, and just being with you, no one else. You fill the holes in my heart that are shaped after you, and hold my heart in the palm of your hands. I never want you to feel like you have to earn me, you are good enough just as you are sweetheart. I don’t only want the good parts, I’ll be by you through the bad parts too. We’re in this together and I never intend to break that promise bunny.”, you shyly smile. No one has ever talked to you in such a caring manner that wasn’t meant to be taken platonically. “I really, really want to kiss you Tetsu.” You lean into Kuroo still feeling doubtful. “Okay, I’m all yours.”, you quickly kiss him, seizing the opportunity he gave you. 

 You both start getting lost in the feeling of kissing each other, relishing in how quiet your mind was, thoughts buried in the thought of how plush Kuroo’s lips felt. You never wanted this feeling to stop, Kuroo pulls away from you, still close enough to pull you back in. “I guess this trip brought you a new boyfriend, huh?”, you pause laughing for a moment remembering back to the cafe. “You’re such a nerd Tetsu.”, you look down to his lips wanting to kiss away his cocky smirk. “Oh, you forgot this at the hotel by the way, clumsy girl”, you looked at him in concern before seeing the K necklace, shocked. “I made sure to fix it for you, I can’t have my baby wearing it broken now, can I?”, he smirks looking at you. You turn around letting him lay the necklace down, clasping it together. “You know how I said I kept the receipt?”, you nod, “Well I kinda lied about that.” You turn around slowly, “Kuroo Tetsuro, how much did you spend on this? What if I had said no to your confession?” He grabs your face close to his smirking, “Well good thing I already said I’m all yours sweetheart.”, kissing you softly relishing in the thought that you both belong to each other.

divider credit to @/anitalenia and @/thecutestgrotto

˚ ༘ ೀ⋆｡˚ melon's marginalia: please enjoy, this is my first long fic and i hope you love it! inbox is open if you have any comments!! kuroo is slowly becoming my fav character!! 🐈‍⬛

[longing-for-rain]

Ember Island Players…Racist Caricatures or Meta Commentary?

This episode was supposed to be a fun filler episode to recap the events of the show in a silly way before the series finale, but it’s managed to become arguably one of the most controversial episodes in the fandom. Over the years, Aang’s possessive behavior towards Katara has been rightfully criticized, but there are always people who attempt to justify everything Aang does.

Apparently, the latest iteration of this is the claim that—wait for it—we should be sympathetic towards Aang and give him a pass in The Ember Island Players because he felt “emasculated” due to the supposed “feminization” of his culture.

I’ve been called racist for saying this is a reach, but it’s more than a reach. It’s an entire acrobatics routine; a level of media illiteracy that shows a lack of understanding of the point of that episode.

Yes, Aang’s character is portrayed in a silly, mocking way. So are all of the other characters. That’s the point; the episode was a filler, a gimmick, and the underlying comedy is the fact that all of the characters are reacting to exaggerated, one-dimensional versions of their own personalities.

For example:

Katara is portrayed as an “overemotional crybaby” in her own words, and is constantly giving motivational speeches and crying

Sokka’s “comedic relief” archetype is played up to the point his lines are just corny one-liners

Zuko is portrayed as an angsty, whiny pretty-boy who acts like a bratty asshole at all times

Toph is a huge buff guy (although in this case, it’s a play on how her character was originally going to be a “jock” type male character)

As for Aang? He’s portrayed as unserious, goofy, and childish. Which—just like all the others—is a jokey exaggeration of his childish demeanor and nature. He’s not even alone in taking offense to his portrayal. All of the characters aside from Toph hate their characters for largely the same reason. They’re being confronted with aspects of themselves that make them insecure. For Aang, it’s his immaturity—and specifically his fears that he’ll be rejected by Katara.

As for why Aang is played by a woman? Well, we don’t actually have to wonder about that, because the creators themselves answer this question in the episode commentary.

Bryan: “It's sort of a self-referential joke. Whenever you do a animated show, they usually want to cast, uh, women...who are, like, in their thirties to play boys, because you never know how long the show is gonna go on, and, you know, as Jack mentioned earlier, boys' voices start cracking.” (source)

Wow, imagine that! An inside joke about the cartoon industry in a show’s meta-episode dedicated to making fun of itself? Impossible!

I’m serious though. The episode transcript is right here. Point me to where exactly there is even the slightest hint of anyone bringing up Aang’s culture and tying his childish behavior to it.

That’s right; it isn’t there. Because that wasn’t the point. Aang’s anger did stem from feeling emasculated, but it had nothing to do with culture and everything to do with his own misogynistic attitudes. He was offended at his portrayal on an individual level. I’m not denying that the issue of oppressive nations using femininity as an insult against men of colonized nations is a very real issue, but that was never a theme present in this episode. We don’t see Aang expressing anger towards the Fire Nation, nor do we see him mention anything about culture. What we see is Aang, individually, feeling insulting that his actor is female and Aang being angry at Katara, individually, because the play suggested she felt more attracted to Zuko than him.

Trying to downplay Aang’s behavior and suggest we coddle him despite his atrocious treatment of Katara is a disingenuous reading of the episode.

Why are you reaching to make an excuse for Aang when if you’re really taking the “the point of the episode is that the play is racially demeaning the characters” angle…and why are you not bringing up Sokka? He’s portrayed as a dumb oaf who is always talking about eating meat. There is a much stronger argument to be made there about caricatures, but Sokka isn’t threatening anyone’s ship so apparently nobody cares.

And while we’re talking about caricatures, how about this crap?

Sorry, Aang stans, but this show and Aang’s character aren’t the enlightened portrayals of anti-colonialism and groundbreaking activism you think they are. It’s pretty clear from the context and the episode itself what the intention here was. It is poorly aged comedy from the early 2000s written by white Americans. And we will continue to critique that, thanks.

[cormorant-red]

I played 999 recently at @xivu-arath's recommendation, and I had so much fun that (inspired by that one polygon video) I illustrated my liveblog about it!

If you haven't played 999 and you are even a little bit intrigued by a puzzle/mystery visual novel with multiple timelines that all guide you towards wild plot twists...probably don't read the text! 999 is the kind of story that is best experienced with no knowledge besides the basic premise.

Transcript below the cut:

Cormorant: characters in this game really just say shit like "have you heard the story about the crystallization of glycerin?"

as a matter of fact i haven't, june, please enlighten me

Storm: "I know we're stuck in a freezer but. let's talk about weird mythical science!"

Cormorant: it's also killing me that junpei is dressed like marty mcfly and isn't sharing any of his jackets

-----

Cormorant: this game is leading me to arrive at mathematical concepts on my own. what the heck

Storm: kshgushhsg

I take it you're having a good time then

Cormorant: trying to check lotus's work and it turns out that no matter what group i arrange to take through a door, the people left behind will always have the same digital root

so to get through door 7 with snake missing, i could either send a group with sum 16 (junpei, ace, clover, and june) or with sum 25 (clover, june, seven, and lotus), but it doesn't matter because the remainder always have root 9 and can't get through doors 3 or 8! wild!

Storm: yeah the numbers and which doors end up barred to you is so cleverly deliberate

-----

Cormorant: i'm glad i finally checked what novel mode meant, because this is way more fun

Santa cocked his head to one side, like an inquisitive bird, and looked at them.

After several long moments, during which it became apparent that Santa had no idea what the cards meant, June took pity on him.

i'll have to go back and redo the beginning after i get to the first ending

Storm: oh yeah! as I recall that was done differently when it was originally a dual screen game... but it's much better when in novel style. gimme all the descriptions

-----

Cormorant: I had a long day of sitting though presentations and so I entertained myself by calculating digital roots

I discovered that adding 9 or any multiple of 9 to a number has no effect on the digital root, which is awfully interesting bc I got to the part where snake gets killed. Assuming door 3 was opened with 12 and not 21, the options are 7+3 (motive?), 6+4 (they’d both have to be REALLY good actors), or 9+1. And if bracelets work without a body attached, and if ace picked it up in door 5…

That would be a really useful tool to get around the 3-person minimum without altering the digital root

I’m also very intrigued by the theory that zero is also in the game but I don’t know what to do with that yet

Storm: forlornly having to keep myself from saying literally anything

Cormorant: Understandable, please don’t give me any hints! I’m just calling shots for the joy of being wrong

-----

Cormorant: and how do you know that, my traitorous friend?

Santa: “The RED doesn’t need a person, you know.”

Santa: “All I need is the bracelet.”

-----

Cormorant: y’know what i think he’s bluffing. he does need June specifically and that’s why he refused to consider leaving her when they first found door 9. if all he needed was a hostage, he could have grabbed junpei and forced ace to come along, and then he would be dealing with two people under duress instead of three

i peeked at a guide and apparently i found the ending adjacent to the true ending(?) first, oh well. time to see the others!

santa: i said i don't want to leave seven alone

me: bud you can't do a heroic sacrifice too, it'll mess up all the math

reader, he was not doing a heroic sacrifice

-----

Storm: got any character opinions or theories to share so far?

Cormorant: hmm I’ve got soft spots for santa and lotus maybe just because they were in the first group I went with. I like that the game makes a point of showing that lotus is quick with the math/technical knowledge. I warmed up to clover and seven more than I expected to! I have no evidence to mistrust ace….but I don’t trust him

Snake died before I before I could say two words to him

Or…didn’t. Forgot clover said he didn’t

I got info about the previous experiments from clover and I wonder if we’re like…reenacting the past somehow? Experiencing morphogenetic resonance with the last voyage?

Again no evidence i just wonder where the pseudoscience is going

Storm: santa was so my type as soon as I started playing that I just picked all rooms with him on my first run skugrhsghu

Cormorant: AHAHA that makes me feel better about going “yeahhh door 4 I like the cut of this guy’s jib”

-----

Cormorant: “the bracelet comes off when your heart rate reaches zero” interesting then that we’ve brought up cryostasis

-----

Cormorant: i simply don't trust him not to have a spare bracelet in his pocket!!!

They climbed into the elevator and Junpei listened to it creak and rattle its way to the bottom deck. Only Junpei, Ace, and Lotus were left.

As the elevator rumbled out of sight, Ace spoke.

Ace: “Lotus, would you be so kind as to go with me?”

Cormorant: “bad end” YEAH I’LL SAY

Storm: lkksghr yeah there's a few of those!

Cormorant: santa was really quick to declare that he, june, and seven needed to go with clover. waht's his game

june and ace could have done it just as easily

Storm: they could have! good catch

maybe he just thinks seven is cooler than ace,

Cormorant: i'm imagining clover taking all her grisly trophies to the door only to find it already engaged, because lotus needed no persuading,

and regarding the true ending requirements, it's also funny that santa's like "i hate this bookmark! get it out of my sight!" and this is a huge help in junpei befriending the girl who's otherwise about to snap

Storm: load bearing bookmark

Cormorant: good thing you threw that tantrum bud or you would have been killed with an axe

-----

Cormorant: in my suspicions i forgot a critical detail, which is that he didn't actually go into the door with the body this time

of course seven has been propping doors open, so it really could have been anybody

-----

Cormorant: "where have these 16 boys and girls disappeared to?" eight for each game and then an experimenter? again with the idea that zero might be in the game...

-----

Cormorant: bad endings complete! on to the normal ending, which hopefully has less of junpei getting stabbed to death

puzzling over who could have done all those murders, especially in the sub ending...or did everyone get killed? clover thinks that snake's death was faked. or did snake do all the murders, since he was the only one unaccounted for?...and then i remember what kind of game i'm playing. can't discount the ice mummy as a suspect.

Storm: you truly cannot ignore the possibility of the ice mummy

-----

Cormorant: ah no, so santa's sister was the kid that died...

i can't figure out the connection between events! why did the last games have the veneer of a science experiment, while this one has no context given? why was it all kids last time, and a random mix of ages this time, with some repeat subjects?

-----

Cormorant: called it!!!!

Junpei: “Ace, Guy X, and the 9th Man’s bracelet.”

Junpei: “That was all you needed to open door [3].”

Cormorant: called it before i even got to an ending ehehe

what i’ve been saying!!

Ace: “(9) is a potent ally in the Nonary Game.”

Ace: “Adding (9) to any set of numbers won’t alter the digital root.”

Ace: “As you can see, (9) is a very useful number here.”

Ace: “With it, one can go anywhere, with anyone.”

Ace: “It is, I suppose you could say, a game changer.”

-----

Cormorant: okay, normal ending finished! junpei did not get stabbed but we also didn’t resolve much…I’m now thinking that ace with his pocket drugs could have easily played dead in the sub ending

glad to see that snake is okay and hopefully can stay okay in the true ending. where did clover get that riddle, and will she still have it?

0=6. how much do I read into this

still don’t understand how we get from here to santa hostage situation. he’s been so consistent about not even considering betraying or abandoning people, so either he’s a better actor than ace…or it’s staged. are he and june in cahoots

Storm: augh so close now!! soon I can actually say things

-----

Cormorant: O FUCK

Seven: “Santa’s always in the room with her. That’s what you’re saying, isn’t it?”

Snake: “Yes, that’s right.”

Clover: “What about it…?”

Snake: “That’s quite simple, really.”

Snake: “You told me that the first time you came to this room…”

Snake: “…Santa was the first to refuse to leave June behind.”

Snake: “Now, doesn’t that beg the question “why?” Why would Santa do such a thing?”

Snake: “The answer is easy.”

Storm: B)

Cormorant: i've been thinking of them as a pair because it makes the math easier! if you've got 3 + 6 + 8, just cross out the ones that make 9 and don't even bother with the addition, your root is 8

Storm: B) B) B)

Cormorant: but god!! they are a pair, do not separate (or the jig is up)

Storm: they hid it soooo well

-----

Cormorant: was wondering when we would see the last cradle guy and oh duh, he was guy X

i did think it was odd that santa phrased it as "i need to leave two of you behind" rather than "i need three of you to come with me," but if he was responsible for everything (most things?), he knew that snake was there, and he was setting up a group that could follow him. excited to see where this is going!

[dreamy sigh] this game is so elegant. what a little puzzle box

Storm: yeah it is, it's just so wonderfully crafted. so little is wasted!

-----

Cormorant: oh boy [akane vision label]

"through the morphic fieldset we were resonant, and we were as one" i don't think i've mentioned it before but i'm constantly pleasantly surprised by the narration in this game. it's not flashy but it's evocative in a way that's really working for me

Storm: this is where the port falls short a bit of the original version... the ds really worked well with this aspect

-----

Cormorant: the number of times i thought "this will be totally wrong but i'll say it to storm anyway"

hello??? [arrow pointing back to the message “I wonder if we’re like…reenacting the past somehow? Experiencing morphogenetic resonance with the last voyage?”]

Storm: Y E A H

Cormorant: laser-guided spitballing

-----

Cormorant: man i said that 4+6 would have to be really good actors if they were the ones that opened door 3...and while they didn't kill snake, i sure underestimated our queen of the stage akane kurashiki

the baseline was NOT where i thought it was

Storm: no one does it like her

[threepandas]

Bad End: Stolen

I was furious.

Terrified. Completely enraged. Sick to my stomach. Overwhelmed and yet expected to function. To keep my shaking hands smooth and screaming thoughts orderly. All I wanted to do want scream. Cry. Destroy and destroy, weep and RAGE.

Then hide in a closet under blankets until the monsters went away.

But... but he wasn't going too, was he?

"Ah, my honored Sister, how good of you to join me." Greets the murderer before me, voice cool and smooth like the scales of a snake. There is a gleefully victorious lilt to that voice. A curling possessiveness to the title.

I am not his sister. We are not ever REMOTELY related. It is not even a matter of me disowning him for what he's down. It is simple truth. We are not, by blood, related. We were not RAISED together. Our relation? A farce. A legal machination by my... my Father, oh gods... No! Don't get swallowed by the memories! T-The blood. Focus!!

Fafnir is... WAS just one of many promising, talented, ambitious young men with no father's that DEFINITELY were my Father's bastard sons, no really. He most certainly wasn't COLLECTING meritorious youth into our house, under his name, and training them up with his wealth and influence. To bypass the bullshit class system and give them a chance at better lives!

Maybe suggest they pay it forward.

My father would never be so duplicitous. No, no, he was just a very lustful man... that no one ever saw going out to have sex. Who's wife had never been the least bit upset with him. And to whom he was fiercely loyal. Yes. Very, very lustful my father... w-was.

It was just while the family continued it's work on opening up opportunities for the lower classes. Jobs and better quality of life. Hospitals and schools. Fighting against those who benefited from nothing changing. It was slow. Like pulling teeth. The work of lifetimes, he'd said. I... I was expected to help continue it.

I'd been GLAD too. So utterly RELIEVED I was reborn into a house with some fucking sense of RESPONSIBILITY. Duty and honor and taking care of people! Building up social services! I had grand plans. Even after recognizing, a little alarmed, that I was on the fringe of a god damned OTOME game of all things.

One I barely remembered. Had played, loved most likely, as a preteen. A literal lifetime ago.

It didn't effect me, right? I wasn't here for boys or parties. Politics or fanciful dreams. Let someone else have their lace filled, flower coated, high drama adventures of love. I had late night paperwork and community research. Surprise to orphanages and hospitals to insure their was no corruption or mischief going on.

That one health clinic in Oakworth that took forever to get going.

Except...

Except??

Fafnir was a capture target! Which is why it took me forever to realize. As he had been so very small and filthy at first. Then merely small and in poor health. Short hair because his poor hair had been beyond saving. We passed by each other. Nodded, maybe exchanged pleasantries, but did not truely interact.

He lived in the dorms. I lived in the main house. He was basicly a student my father was paying to have taught, using our name. I was my father's actual daughter. We may have LEGALLY been related. LEGALLY brother and sister. But in actuality? We were no such thing.

Honestly, most of the "Sons"? Kept their original last names in day to day life.

Or at least... they did.

I.. I think I had shit taste, as a preteen. That or my luck has finally run out. Maybe it was my family's fortune, that finally could no longer best the odds. After all, there is always one. That ONE soul. Who sees something good and doesn't care about anything or anyone but themselves. Ruins things for everyone.

As long as they get their's, right?

A sea of motivated and ambitious young men. Trying to change their station in life. Have Better and MORE. Change the world around them. Leave their marks. Is... ha! Is it any wonder, in hindsight, that our luck eventually gave out? It was always going too. I guess Fafnir just wanted MORE.

He was supposed to go to the Royal Academy, fall in love. Compete against prince's and duke's, knights and heirs to merchant companies. All for the heart of the only daughter of a Ducal house, that had been (of course) raised by peasants. A carriage accident and presumed death cliché.

I honestly couldn't even remember his route. I might have read about it. But had never PLAYED it. He had had short hair, all but two had. So I played the foriegn prince route, even though he was kind of an ass. He was a handsome one at least. At least to me. It was just, I had never... still never...

I liked men with long hair.

Something which I had never told anyone.

Yet? As Fafnir grew? He did not transition into the character I remembered, like the others had. He grew his hair out. Became not only fiercely protective of it, but invested in higher quality products to care for it. Discovered my favorite perfume maker and commissioned a cologne for himself, that would mix well with the scent I always wore. Systematically tracked down each and everything I've ever liked, behind my back, to consume and memorize every facet of them.

I was blind to it.

My Father was not.

And... a-and... it cost him his life.

Father was not pleased with want he saw. But assumed it was a crush at first. We were young after all. Young people do weird, awkward, over the line things. Are learning about boundaries even as they grapple with sudden floods of hormonal shifts. A terrible time, really. It could be excused. As long as it didn't go TOO far. So long as someone sat Fafnir down for a talk.

They did.

He got more subtle.

A cycle developed. One my Father was not pleased to see. Fafnir would cross boundaries, be caught, get scolded, and contritely apologize... then get more subtle in his approach. Be more clever. As though all he had learned was "don't get caught". and "if you want to get, what you want to have, you need to have the skills to get passed us."

He grew concerned. Eventually, alarmed. I had thought nothing of it, back then, because "of COURSE he was supposed to go" to the Royal Academy? But... we honestly, really, Truely? HADN'T sent anyone there before. And there HAD been far more skilled boy then him. Prodigies.

But... my favorite ribbon necklace had gone missing.

From the room where I slept.

Overnight.

My Father took one look at Fafnir's pleased expression amongst the chaos and needed no further proof. He would not kick him out. Far too dangerous, he thought. But he WOULD send him away. Now?

Now I wish he'd risked it. Because... because everyone was dead. Struck down by the monster we let into our home. And by ancient law, which we both KNEW he was planning to exploit? This was a... a "family matter". Because, after all, we WERE legally family. Members of the same House.

"Such hesitation, Sister. You'd think I was a threat." He muses into his cup of tea, swirling it lightly. His eyes flit back to me, lips curling just slightly. "Don't worry, though. I understand completely. I would never hurt you."

But he would hurt others. He already has. Most of them didn't survive it. Ha ha... like a brutal yank on some unseen leash. I want to cry. Not sure if this is what shock feels like. But yes, thank you, for the lovely remind, Fafnir. That you have filled my home with bodies. The corpses of those I loved.

I use what little dignity I have left to walk forward and sit down.

Oh look, he has utterly ruined all my favorite things in one blow. There, my favorite tea. That, my favorite flower. Across the table my favorite snacks. Even a few favorite fruits. A dish or two. My favorite cup. And now? N..NOW? All I will every be able to associate with them is death. The stench of copper and the horror of this moment.

The joy of them is gone.

"See? Isn't that better? No more standing awkwardly to the side. Now we can sit, face to magnificent face. I've brought you a few things I know you'll enjoy. Isn't that nice? I've wanted to do this for the longest time." He sighs in contentment, as though this were no more then a matter of busy schedules and social anxiety. "And now? Now we are finally together. Siblings for now, but I am working to fix that. And if i can't, well..."

His smirk was a thing of nightmares.

"I'm head of the house now. You're finally Mine."

[let-us-cultivate-our-garden]

The reason why the toh fandom can have such wildly diverging interpretations of the Wittebane story is because the show did not do its job. How old was Philip when Caleb left? Did Caleb truly believe in witch hunting or was he just playing along to what the town expected? Did Caleb ever tell Philip anything? Did he ever talk to his brother and try to change his mind? How long was Philip searching for Caleb? How did he get cursed? How exactly did the knife fight start? Did Philip kill Caleb accidentally or on purpose? Did he kill him only because he married a witch or because he left him? Or both?

The fact is, we don't have definitive answers to any of these. We only have educated guesses based on portraits barely glimpsed in the show that lack any context, Masha's barebones version of events, and Belos' self-justifications. Casual fans shouldn't have to be knee-deep in fandom just to get the main villain's backstory, especially when said story is the literal basis of the whole plot.

Plus, if you're going to spend the final half of your last season barely exploring the villain's origins, only to completely ignore it in the series finale, then you've written a bad ending.

Update: This is getting some notes so I'm including additional thoughts to the original post. The rest will be under the read more:

Just to add onto this because some folks argue that we don’t need his backstory because we already have the essentials or it’s not really important to the plot. The thing is though is that Belos’ story launches the entire plot of the show, his character and motivation are the direct result of actions that happened centuries before the main characters were born. It needs to be depicted and not largely inferred. 

His story is important to creating a more fleshed out character and can strengthen the themes of the show (the rivalry between Eda and Lilith and Luz struggling to fit in at home are parallels to Belos). Instead the show gives little kernels of his story and character that make him more interesting than just Evil Emperor (the fact that the brothers became witch hunters to fit in, the fact that Belos worst memories are of killing Caleb and making grimwalkers are never touched on again). The first (and last) time we see Caleb in a full scene is in For the Future and it has huge implications for the dynamic between the two brothers. But again, nothing is done with it. It seemed like the show was building up that Belos’ lies and self-justifications would lead to his undoing but it doesn’t. So him dying with his ideology and self-delusions intact feels empty.

The worst part of how the Wittebane story is handled is that since it’s largely inferred and you have to be pretty involved in fandom to have a more nuanced take of it, a casual fan can easily just accept other characters’ views on the matter. Masha says “looks like little bro was jealous of big bro” and it undercuts the story of the Wittebanes (to say nothing of the tonal whiplash). The Titan dismisses Belos as only caring for himself and to be the hero, which while technically true, misses a lot of context and makes it easy to dismiss Belos as a whole as simply being evil and crazy instead of a more layered villain. And it can’t be argued that these are just the characters’ perspectives and we shouldn’t take it at face value because there’s nothing really in the show to pushback against that. 

Now, yes, it is fun to imagine how the Wittebane story played out and in hindsight, it’s probably better that the show didn’t depict the entire story because they probably would have botched it. But the point remains that the handling of this storyline was a mess (and don’t give me the cancellation excuse, the show learned early on about this and wrote all of 2B with it in mind). The Wittebane story and Belos as a whole showcase why setup and payoff matter. You show the villain feels guilt about their worst deeds? What’s the payoff to that? The villain was originally an outsider who tried to fit in and conformed to a town’s toxic ideologies? What’s the payoff? The villain continually lies to himself and commits atrocities to justify his actions? What’s the payoff? 

If you’re going to raise interesting and thought-provoking questions then don’t give the audience a simplistic answer.

[marmota-b]

Regarding Boromir, his death scene, and redemption / repentance (book vs film)

A bit of a callback to my original post on the topic of redemption, and inspired by a post calling (correctly) Boromir's trying to take the Ring one moment of weakness. I think I've finally figured out (I was low-key aware of it, but never put it into so many words) why I like the book version of Boromir's last moments much more than the film version, and why it pains me the film version seems to be what so many people prefer and so many fic writers inevitably reach for.

"I tried to take the Ring from Frodo. I am sorry. I have paid." ... "Farewell, Aragorn! Go to Minas Tirith and save my people! I have failed." "No!" said Aragorn, taking his hand and kissing his brow. "You have conquered. Few have gained such a victory. Be at peace! Minas Tirith shall not fail!"

Emphases mine, obviously, but when I think about it it's quite telling in which order they tell each other the things they say, and of course how exactly they say them.

The most important thing here, though it is on both their minds and it is what connects them and what their personal motivation is, isn't Gondor. Yes, Boromir is very worried about the fate of his country, but the first thing he tells Aragorn is what he has done, and that he is sorry.

And the very first thing Aragorn tells Boromir is assure him that he did not fail.

It's not a question of warrior honour, the way the film states it ("You fought bravely. You kept your honour."). It's a question of the main conflict of the book, that between the Ring's temptations and the ability to see it as the evil artifact it is.

The film keeps framing a lineage / authority / responsibility conflict between Boromir and Aragorn that's finally resolved, but that's not at all the conflict that matters (or, really, even exists) here. What Boromir is actually saying in relation to Gondor is "I now recognise that what I tried to do to save my people would have actually doomed them, and I recognise you have indeed been much wiser in this than I from the start. Please keep doing that, I can't change what I did now because I'm about to die." And some of it is present in the film, definitely, but it's muddled with the whole issue of both Aragorn and Boromir questioning Aragorn's legitimacy. Which means in the film Boromir's death scene ends up serving us Boromir repenting his behaviour towards Aragorn and... I hope we can all agree that's actually not the point Tolkien was making with Boromir's death scene in the book.

One moment of weakness. Boromir immediately saw that what he had done was wrong, and tried to make amends the only way he could at the moment. He did not keep trying to pursue Frodo, except to apologise (which admittedly Aragorn does not know, but it's still inherent in what Boromir tells him here). Boromir let go of the Ring even after being very, very sorely tempted, and Aragorn can see that. That IS a huge victory. THAT is a huge victory.

And the film frames that main conflict as it played out in the breaking of the Fellowship... wrong. The film leaves us with Boromir the man who succumbed to temptation, and died for his sins, and Aragorn the man who did not succumb and lived, and Boromir submits to the latter. That's not what happens in the book. In the book Aragorn simply never really went through a full moment of culmination of long-term temptation like that. Aragorn recognised and respected Boromir as someone who had reached the moment of culmination of long-term temptation, succumbed, and saw the light anyway. Meanwhile Boromir thinks he's paying for his sin and basically doomed, so Aragorn assures him that no, it was just a moment of weakness and he has overcome it. (Oh, and what also happens in the book is that after a long period of temptation even Frodo succumbs, and lives.)

My main problem with the film version is that the films inadvertently downplayed the main conflict and main theme of the whole story and served up the wrong moral.

[monsterblogging]

I think it's very interesting to compare and contrast Final Fantasy VI and Final Fantasy VII. These two installments have so much in common, storywise and thematically. (As I understand it, this might have something to do with FF7's production being pretty rushed.)

In the past these similarities kind of annoyed me - but now I think it's interesting to see how these two stories play these ideas out.

I know there's been some amount of debate over whether FF6's Kefka or FF7's Sephiroth is the "better" villain, and honestly? We should not be pitting these bad boys against each other. Each character embodies a different yet realistic response to the same type of traumatic origin.

Both of these characters are the result of an evil empire's attempt to create the perfect soldier. Both were infused with the essence of other beings to give them great power. In being engineered and groomed to be the perfect weapons, both were dehumanized and denied healthy and loving family relationships. And both of them are depressed as hell.

Kefka's ultimate reaction to this is utter nihilism. He has no vision of a better future, but instead lives for whatever cheap thrills his power can give him. But these acts of violence don't fix his depression, and so he seeks more and more power and ultimately escalates to trying to destroy the world.

I've seen people saying that Kefka isn't a tragic villain, but he 100% is. He didn't have any say in what Emperor Gestahl did to him as a child. He was literally just a little kid. Unfortunately, he ultimately makes himself such a massive problem that there is no choice but to take him down. (The characters actually do try to tell him that his nihilistic worldview is wrong, but he won't hear it. He's just too far gone.)

Sephiroth, on the other hand, is actually seeking a better future. He very much wants to live in a better world than the one created by the capitalist empire that created him. But he's effectively a reactionary who (like all reactionaries) fundamentally misunderstands the problem and disregards a lot of very important nuance. Sephiroth concludes that a better world is only possible if he destroys all of humanity, which he's concluded they collectively deserve for harming the being he believes is his mother.

Each character tries to address their problems in different ways, but both end up repeating the cruelty of the institutions that produced them because they're ultimately just doing what they know. As they become gods (not false gods, not godlike, but actual gods), they come to fully embody the essence of the empires that created them. Each one has different mentalities and motives, but together they show us a very simple truth: that the only endgame of boundless greed and powerlust is the annihilation of everyone.

[miss-hyoko]

Teasing Him Ft. Savanaclaw

Character(s): Leona, Ruggie, and Jack

Summary: You're trying to tease him

Tag(s) and warning(s): GN!Reader, fluff, romantic, established relationship, mutual pining, cringe pickup lines

Note: Yayy, another day means another fluffiness. Today we have the Savanaclaw boys to be teased💃💃

1. Leona Kingscholar

Today is one of those rare days for the members of Spelldrive Club. All of that because their club leader, Leona, who usually skips the club activity, suddenly joins them in practice. You're a little curious about Leona's sudden burst of motivation, but that doesn't really matter when you finally see your boyfriend play on the field. The way he leads other people, the passion in his eyes, all of that is very different from his usual lazy self. And it becomes his special charm that makes you head over heels for him.

When it's time to rest, Leona comes to you who was sitting in the shade of a tree. You gave Leona the water and towel that you had prepared earlier, making him mutter a quick thank you. Looking at him this close, you once again realize how charming Leona can be; making you involuntarily heave a dreamy sigh, feeling lucky to be his lover.

“Why the sigh, herbivore?” Leona asked nonchalantly, but you can catch the subtle worry in his tone.

“No biggie, just wondering about something.”

Leona rolls his eyes, uninterested. But as his lover, somehow you could tell the meaning of every expression on Leona's face. Therefore, you know that just now, he doesn't really mind if you want to tell him what's on your mind. But whether he'll give you a response depends on what you're going to say.

“I'm just wondering, is it possible that your real name is Dion?”

“Hah? What kind of nonsense is this, herbivore?” A frown appeared on his face, “Are you amnesiac or worse, suddenly become stupid?”

Ignoring his harsh words, you laughed lightly and tried to return his focus to your question earlier.

“Come on, Leona, that's not how you answer it. You should be asking me, why do I think that way?”

At your words, Leona suddenly narrowed his eyes suspiciously, realizing that you're up for something again. But facing your expectant gaze, Leona could only take a deep breath and give in.

“Ughh, finee,” he huffed and folded his arms across his chest, “Speak, herbivore. How can you even think my name is Dion?”

Delighted that Leona finally followed along, you smiled broadly and answered his question with a playful wink.

“Because you are Dionly man for me.”

Hearing your own answer, you giggled while the Leona you teased just rolled his eyes lazily.

“Really, herbivores? That's all that you've got?” Saying that, he then grinned and brought his face closer to yours, which made you suddenly flustered.

“Since you've already said that I'm the only man for you, how about I claim you back? Not now, but later in my room.”

2. Ruggie Bucchi

While shopping at Sam's shop, you run into Ruggie who happened to be running an errand for Leona. Both of you talk for a bit before finally paying for your groceries. When you're about to pay, you realize too late that your money is lacking. Before you can apologize to Sam and put your groceries back on the shelves, Ruggie comes over to your side and starts bargaining with Sam.

Their debate is so fierce, there's no room left for you. Once you came back to reality, Ruggie had successfully won the bargain so you only had to pay a third of the original price. Coming out of Sam's shop, Ruggie offers to walk you back, but you declined because you would rather not hold him any longer considering he was running errands for Leona. But… you still want to spend more time with him. So, taking the middle path, you choose to accompany him to deliver the goods back to Leona and then enjoy some time with him in Savanaclaw.

“Hey, you sure you don't mind this?” Ruggie asked on the way back to his dorm. “I mean, you know how busy I've been lately. After I gave these things to Leona, I still had many chores to do. I wasn't sure I could stay with you for too long.”

“No problem,” you answered rather quickly. “I can help you get your work done faster so that we can spend more time together.”

When Ruggie heard that you didn't mind lending him a hand, his tail subconsciously waggled in anticipation. He tried very hard to keep his tail under control while holding back his embarrassment, meanwhile you just laugh seeing the scene.

After his tail calmed down enough, Ruggie cleared his throat to get your attention back, "T-that is a very tempting offer. But you don't have to sweat over it, 'kay? There's no way I'll let my lover do the menial work that should be my job.”

“But, what if I insist on helping you?” You ask again, offering your help once more with a gentle smile.

“Shishishi. Then, who am I to refuse your kindness twice?” Ruggie let out his unique laugh and once again, his tail was wagging happily.

“You know, sometimes I think you're weird,” he said suddenly, looking straight into your eyes. “Normally, people always try not to add more work to their plate. But why are you the other way around? Aren't you too kind?”

“Oh, Ruggie, I'm not such a good person.” You laughed lightly at your boyfriend's question. “I helped you because it was the job I most wanted.”

“Huh?! The job you want the most is to help me?" Ruggie pointed to himself, the man's cheeks flushed red hearing your answer that was beyond expectations.

Seeing his flustered expression, the smile on your face widened even more.

“You're almost right. But to be more precise, the job I want most is to be with you all the time.”

Ruggie's brain seems to stop working when you say that. His eyes still stare at you in disbelief. Gradually, the blush on his cheeks began to spread across his face. And just before his face turned completely red, Ruggie immediately turned his back on you and was walking hastily with his tail constantly wagging around.

“Hurry your pace, (Name)! Leona will be furious if he doesn't get his things soon!”

3. Jack Howl

Today, you were supposed to go on a date with Jack. But a few hours before your appointment time, Jack suddenly calls you to inform that today's date has to be canceled because he got a small accident during a club practice. You're a little upset that your date got canceled, but you're even more concerned about his wound. Even though he said it was only a minor injury, you still insisted on visiting him in the infirmary.

When you went to visit him, you find out that his right leg was sprained from a fall during running practice. The wound is indeed not too serious, but it still makes you worry nevertheless.

“(Name), you don't need to do all of this,” Jack pleaded with a slightly blushing cheeks, looking helplessly at you who was busy cutting the fruits you've brought for him.

Even though you two have been dating for a while, he still feels a bit strange being cared for so tenderly by you. Well, not that he doesn't like your affection, though…

Putting the freshly cut fruits onto the plate, you shook your head in rejection of Jack's request.

“You're still hurt, Jack. So, be a good boy, and get some rest if you want to get well soon.”

You took a piece of apple that you cut with a fork and gave it to Jack, “Now, open your mouth wide. Aaa...”

“(Name), it's just my leg that's injured. My hand can still function properly, you know.”

Even though he said that, Jack still shyly opened his mouth to accept the apple you gave him.

Seeing him eat the apple, you smiled with satisfaction and took another fruit to feed him again.

Apart from the small protest he gave at the beginning, Jack didn't put up any resistance when you fed him.

“T-thanks for your help, (Name). But really, I'm fine,” Jack said after you fed him all the fruits on the plate. “I wasn't careful enough before and accidentally hurt myself. This wound will heal in a few days at most, so you can rest assured.”

“That doesn't change the fact that you fell and got hurt, Jack,” you said as you poured the tea you brought into two different glasses.

“There is no fall that doesn't hurt, (Name).”

“There is, actually, a fall that doesn't hurt,” you said, smiling mysteriously while handing him a glass of warm tea. “I've been through it once.”

Receiving the glass, Jack looked at you in astonishment. “What kind of fall doesn't hurt?” he asked while sipping his tea.

“Fall in love with you, of course.”

You chuckled softly seeing Jack who almost choked hearing your answer. You immediately gave him the tissue you had prepared and he muttered a quick thank you.

“I-I suddenly think you're right, (Name). I'm injured, so I need a lot of rest to recover quickly,” he said with perfectly flushed cheeks before finally turning his back on you and trying hard to sleep. 

[antimatterz]

solace

dan heng x gn!reader

summary: life has gotten you down, but he won't let you give up. he's there to hold you together, and he won't let go.

cw: suicidal thoughts – do not read if this triggers you. hurt/comfort, dan heng being the sweetest.

enyo's note: don't mind me this is very self-indulgent. i'm not in a good place at the moment and i would love a dan heng to help me through it. not proofread & might take it down, actually.

content under the cut | masterlist

the world had gotten you down.

ultimately, fighting your mental battles got the best of you. for aeons, you had been fighting the demons in your mind. day after day, you struggled to fend off the darkness, but the shadows that shrouded your inner flame had won. you had been tearing at the seams for months, but you finally broke.

your thoughts were dark, consuming you whole. you were suffering, all on your own. why did life bring nothing but turmoil? you wanted peace, you wanted to enjoy being alive, you wanted to serve a genuine smile to the people around you. but your demeanor was fake, nothing but an act you carefully put on to fool the others. again, you carried your burdens on your own, and you succumbed underneath the heavy weight of it all.

you no longer experienced happiness, all you felt was gloom and misery. you were hopeless, frustrated, frantically holding on to the final strands of light that were rapidly vanishing. honestly, why were you even still alive?

maybe giving up wasn't that bad.

those thoughts pestered you as you spent your time alone in your room. you had reached your breaking point and distanced yourself from your friends. you didn't have the energy left to put on an act, you couldn't muster a fake smile anymore. it was game over for you. life had won.

you had no more tears left to cry as you lay in bed, curled up into a little ball. you've spent the last few hours like that, staring ahead as you let the darkness consume you.

you hadn't eaten today, and your stomach felt empty. but what did it matter? you felt empty in general, you had gotten used to it and it didn't bother you anymore. you deftly ignored it, not even motivated to take care of yourself properly. what did it matter, anyway? you didn't care.

there was a knock on your door, one that you didn't respond to. you didn't want to see anyone, let alone have to explain your miserable state. you chose to suffer alone, after all, not wanting to worry the others. your burdens were yours to carry, you didn't want to bother them with it.

again, the idea of giving up crossed your mind – like it did every other minute. all your struggles, all your burdens, everything would be gone and you would finally have peace. you didn't have any hope left for things getting better. what was the point of trying? maybe life wasn't meant for you. clearly, your mind wasn't wired for this world.

whoever it was at your door knocked again, but you remained silent. you were so far gone, wallowing in the darkness. however, the person didn't give up, and the door carefully slid open.

"y/n?" a familiar voice called out.

you said nothing, not turning around even when dan heng shut the door behind him. footsteps inched closer, increasing speed as he neared your bed.

the mattress dipped under his weight as he sat down.

"march was worried about you because she hasn't seen you in two days," the male explained, hesitating for a moment. "and honestly, so am i. this is very unlike you. are you okay?"

hearing his voice was nice, you had to admit that. it was true; you hadn't spoken to anyone for the past two days, which was sure to raise concern. although you still weren't sure if you were in the mood to face anyone, you still sat up, aversively facing dan heng. you considered lying, simply playing it off as the flu that got you down. but one look into his solemn grey eyes swayed you from your original plan.

"no," you replied, voice breaking. "no, i'm not okay."

dan heng's usually stoic face fell, genuine concern falling upon his features. you must've looked terrible – tired, dead on the inside, dull eyes. your will to live was close to zero at the moment, and it was probably very obvious from the way you looked at him.

he searched your eyes, as if they would tell him what was wrong. for some reason, the way he gazed at you had you feeling vulnerable, tears welling up in your eyes. you felt your will to remain strong in front of others faltering, and it wasn't long before the first sob racked your body.

"hey," dan heng said, surprise lingering his tone. he was quick to reach out and grab your hand, completely dropping his usually cold and distant demeanor. "y/n, what's wrong?"

"everything," you admitted shakily. "dan heng, why is life so hard? why is it trying so hard to bring me down? it's not fair, i try so hard but it just doesn't get better." you were silent for a moment, wondering if you were really going to admit your darkest thoughts to him. you pursed your lips. what did it matter? what was stopping you? maybe it was nice to confide in someone. especially dan heng, the one you considered your closest friend. you continued, "the idea of giving up becomes stronger with every moment that passes. i don't want to live like this anymore."

the raven-haired male seemed genuinely shocked by your confession. his eyes widened, but he quickly recollected himself and shot forward like a bullet fired from a gun. you stumbled back in surprise, but he caught you before you could fall. ever so gently, he cupped your cheeks, using his thumbs to wipe away the tears that spilled.

"y/n, i had no idea you were going through this," dan heng mumbled. "why did you pretend to be happy all the time? why didn't you tell anyone about your suffering?"

"i don't know," you said, lightly shaking your head. "i guess i just didn't want to worry anyone. what goes on in my head isn't pretty. i just kept telling myself it would be better to disappear and–"

"stop right there," the male hushed you, removing one hand from your cheek to press his index finger against your lips. "you're very important to me, angel. i don't want you to suffer alone and even more, i do not want you to go."

there was nothing left of his usual placid demeanor, and the look in his eyes was soft as he gazed at you. it almost made you tear up again, this time for entirely different reasons. this side of dan heng was completely new to you, and it lit a small spark within you. you leaned into his touch carefully, closing your eyes in a small moment of peace. the storm in your mind ceased for a blissful second, and you relished in the feeling dan heng brought you.

"listen, y/n. please don't do this to yourself. please, just reach out to me if your thoughts threaten to get the best of you. you don't have to carry everything on your own. you have march, you have me. and there's welt and himeko. we're a family, we are here for you and wouldn't be complete without you."

dan heng looked at you intently, and you nodded. he was right, you had lost sight of your reasons to live, but he reminded you. you had your astral express family, you had dan heng – who just came to save you from your darkest moment.

letting out a small sigh, he wrapped your arms around you and gently pulled you down with him. you lay like that, safely in his embrace. you felt your inner flame light up a little, and faint strands of hope intertwined with the darkness that occupied your mind, shining a new light. dan heng probably had no idea what he just did. suddenly the idea of ending it all lost its appeal, as if dan heng's embrace mended the pieces of you that had been shattered. he held you together, he saved you from falling apart. you gathered your thoughts, gathered your will, bringing new life to what seemed hopeless at first.

"thank you," you muttered, your voice muffled by the fabric of his shirt.

in response, dan heng gently kissed the top of your head. the loving gesture brought a faint smile to your face – tiny, barely there, but genuine. he was right, you weren't alone.

dan heng was your solace.

[comicaurora]

I watched Castlevania: Nocturne the otger day and liked it a lot less than you seemed to, so I want to hear a more detailed opinion if you have one. Am I in the wrong to think it was more shounen and less "deep" in some way?

I'd say it's definitely more shounen. Introducing the "Richter can't do magic because unresolved trauma" thing right from the jump meant a Believing In Yourself powerup was pretty much inevitable, but I liked the execution of that scene enough that I didn't mind much.

It doesn't quite have the backbone of the original Castlevania, which was grounded so strongly in Dracula's apocalyptic grief - a motivation the audience is directed to find deeply understandable from minute one - that it gave the characters a solid thematic core to play off of. This let the writing stay pretty tight by letting Trevor serve as a foiling mirror for Dracula in their mutual disgust with the failures of human kindness, Sypha for Lisa in their altruistic use of their knowledge and their vilification for "witchcraft", and Alucard in the middle torn between worlds.

Nocturne is more loose and character-driven, but it still has a core theme - the argument over "the natural order" and how that plays into a fear of change from those currently on top. However, Richter doesn't really have a horse in that race, since his motivation starts and ends at Kill Vampires while everyone around him is more complex, trying to overthrow the aristocracy and free the enslaved and such. I think this makes Richter feel a little less important than Trevor was, narratively, because he sort of stands apart from the core philosophical debate at play. It took me a few episodes to get what his deal was and start caring about his self-actualization, and I think he's definitely got further to go. Possibly Alucard's presence in season 2 will give him more to play off of.

I think Nocturne has several independently interesting villains instead of one really good villain, which is a complaint I also saw about Castlevania season 4 - I liked Death just fine, but he really didn't work for everyone, and the secondary villains like Saint Germaine were much more interesting and complex. Nocturne does, however, pull off something Castlevania didn't as much, which is most of the characters acting on their own internal consistent motivation without cleanly falling into the "good guy" or "bad guy" box, causing them to slide into and out of conflicts and alliances depending on the circumstances.

I feel like Bathory is kind of a weak core villain with almost no human-level motivations or ideas beyond General Villainy, and the extent of her development being a darkest hour shonen villain powerup/frieza transformation doesn't help much, which is why I'm kind of holding out hope that they just bite the bullet and bring back Dracula. He's the nemesis from the Castlevania games, and while they gave him and Lisa a happy ending in Castlevania season 4, I don't think they need to keep him on the bench forever. It's been 300 years, Lisa is almost certainly long dead again and Dracula doesn't need to be full Mad With Vengeance Burn Down The World to still be a credible problem in need of a little Belmonting.

I had fun with season 1 of Nocturne with the understanding that the first four-episode "season" of Castlevania wasn't representative of the final shape of the story either. Sypha's character, for instance, was very flat before she and the gang went on their season 2 bonding adventure, not much more than some banter and infodumps. I think Nocturne did solid setup of the cast and the theme they'll be unpacking, and it has lots of room to explore these characters in interesting ways once they energy-ball-tennis Bathory out of the way first.

[polarmoon]

my top 24 screenshots of 2024 🌙

this year has been really big for me when it comes to getting back into simblr, after years of long breaks and inconsistency since 2020. i really feel like i'm back in the swing of things, and i'm really happy about it! i also hit 10 years on simblr this june which is wild, and i'm currently a few followers away from a huge milestone :') thank you guys for making this year so special and great!

@kari-sims tagged me! it was a fun little walk down memory lane. i'm not gonna tag anyone, but i do encourage ppl to do it regardless! it's really nice to look back and give your own screenshots some love. <3

i've played a ton of signal hill this year and there could definitely be more of them in this post, but all my favorite screenshots are unedited! i really have to get around to editing and posting those. maybe i'll do a big signal hill queue in january to get caught back up.

my biggest project this year has been rebooting the fitch legacy, which i started prepping in the spring and posting this summer. the prologue section was one of my more ambitious projects i've had on simblr believe it or not, probably since i did legit storytelling back in like 2014-2015 honestly

i'm super proud of how it turned out, even if i'd probably go back and refine my editing process now that i've learned more about what i like. going back and retelling the original first generation through an updated and realistic lens was so much fun!

playing with benji has made me learn to love ts4 again, which has been so rewarding. it's not perfect, but it's nice when you have a sim you actually care about, and benji is definitely that sim for me. i miss him and have been itching to get back into his save but i really want to see if a bands pack is coming next year first lmao

meanwhile my occult legacy has been a really good way to occupy myself while i wait to play the fitches again. it has gotten me out of my comfort zone a lot, and i'm having a ton of fun with a more casual but still challenging and interesting save. it will probably end up on the backburner eventually, but for now i'm really enjoying it and i'm excited to see where things go. i especially love percy, and i'm really excited for his generation, which has been keeping me motivated to play more!

and finally some misc shots. couldn't forget pippa, since her post blew up when i wasn't expecting it and so many people seemed to love her. what a creature. i should honestly upload her tray files or smth

bonus! some of my fav cas shots from this year :) im trying to experiment in cas more, and i think it's going okay. i also wanna just make some sims in ts2 for fun for once since i'm usually solely gameplay focused in ts2. and just posting more in general when im actively playing.

if you've read this far, ty for coming along for the ride, and happy holidays! <3

[shrimpwritings]

Alright, fellas, we need an AU of the early draft of Arcane S1 because it sounds absolutely bonkers, and I’m here for it.

This is from the art book that the Twitter account Arcane In Detail posted.

This sounds. Absolutely nuts.

In contrast to the Vi we know in the finalized version of Arcane, the original Vi seems to have been written in a similar position to Sevika, maybe even taking orders from her. I’m a sucker for AUs, so a Vi villain arc is something I actually kinda want to see.

How would her relationship with Jinx have turned out? Her relationship with Caitlyn? Had this version of Vi heard horror stories from Vander about Silco, yet joined him anyway when the monkey bomb killed her family? Or maybe it played out in a, “If you come work for me, I promise I won’t hurt that dear little sister of yours” scenario between Silco and Vi? Maybe she planned to overthrow Silco one day, and reunite with her sister, a dream that slowly crumbled the further she traveled down a path of evil.

Now, here’s where Jinx comes into play. This scene could have played out similarly to how it did in S1, except Powder runs away, and is either captured by Jules and Verne, or she sneaks onto their airship, leaving Vi to be found by Silco. The outcome of these scenarios leads to one thing; Powder dies, and Jinx is born.

So, due to the fact that I'm unfamiliar with LoL lore, I had to look this up. Bilgewater is a seaside port city where serpent hunters, dock gangs, and smugglers from across Runeterra have taken residency. According to the official LoL site, Bilgewater is a place where many people can safely turn to if they're fleeing from their past transgressions such as debt, justice, or persecution. In Jinx's case, she's fleeing from Zaun, Vi, and her life as Powder. Along the way, she ends up joining a pirate crew, which is the explanation for her "half-eaten circus tent" pants, and more pirate-like appearance according to the art book.

This also brings up multiple questions such as what her relationship with Vi would be like upon her return to Zaun. Would her goal be to find her sister, and that's why she returns to Zaun, much like Vi's main goal in the show? Or does she have another motive to return? How would that affect her relationship with Isha?

What would Ekko and Caitlyn's roles be in a world like this? Considering they're both the ones affected the most by Vi and Jinx through the Timebomb and Caitvi ships, it's a fun thought to try and figure out how their lives would be like in this version of Arcane.

These questions are making me wanna write something about this AU, but I need to read the full artbook first to try and piece together the first draft ideas for Vi and Caitlyn's first meeting, her and Jinx's reunion, Ekko's involvement, and everything in between.

[proxylynn]

Blorbo: Guzma (Pokémon Sun and Moon)

{Wanna see what destruction looks like? Here it is in human form! It's your boy... Guzma!}

[Growing up with Pokémon since gen1, I never really got into the "evil organization"s that pop up in each gen. Mostly because they all follow some contrived stupid thing (minus Geovanni, he thought shit out and was legit) like I wanna flood the land, I wanna use Pokémon to free Pokémon, I want to use a death laser because fuck you, or I want to go unleash Pokémon Satan because reasons, etc. Then Sun/Moon came along and gave me Team Skull and it works... Because they aren't the evil team! (was that all it took for a decent team? to not make them the main villains?) And none of this would matter if the team leader wasn't interesting, which ya boi totally is.

"Guzma originally aspired to become a Trial Captain with Professor Kukui. He was even Hala's apprentice to train in battling. While he was a talented trainer in his own right, having won many trophies and awards, he also struggled in his efforts to be the best, never once having placed first in any tournaments. It is also implied that he suffered domestic abuse from his father and he ran away from home to escape it. He was also rejected as Trial Captain for unknown reasons. After failing to become a Trial Captain, Guzma formed Team Skull with other kids who failed the Trial vowing to destroy the very same traditions that shattered his dreams."

This is a great opening for a character, his motivation is relatable and not some grand over-the-top nonsense. He's a guy who feels he got shafted and when no one backed him up he said "screw you guys, I'm gonna show you you're wrong and make you suffer for doubting me". This alone would work to make me like him, but then they go and make him even more sympathetic. There's some hints of his dad being a possible abusive prick (I say possible because GameFreak likes to leave the fucked up stuff to the creatures more often than the people characters and I'm not 100% on this). He longs for approval and recognition, the man wants respect, so much so he is the henchman to Lusamine who is playing him like a fiddle by giving him the slightest bit of attention (fucking bitch!). Bro, I just want to jump into the game and tell him he's better than this. He's a bug trainer! This man made bug types cool to me! And his love for his bugs, especially his Golisopod, is so damn precious.

Game Freak knows he's awesome because they made Guzma too cool to join that shitshow crew Rainbow Rocket. Dude helps you take all those baddies down like the mother fucking boss he is. Not only this, but it was to Guzma of all people that Ash finally became a league champion and that battle was epic as fuck! Sadly, they would try to rehash this greatness and, frankly, it just isn't good (Team Yell and Star). Still, as much as I don't care for Pokémon as much as I used to, I still follow blogs on here that are about Guzma. Shout out to elbdot who has a long-running still going strong Pokémon Sun/Moon comic series with best boi Guzma being a key character, I love it so much!]

[crystillyzed]

at the rainbow's end // mysta rias

pairing: mysta rias x gn!reader

word count: 4.1k

genre: fluff, staff!reader, mutual pining, wingman elira

content warning(s): swearing, unedited

summary:

After nearly a year of hearing each other's voice, you finally meet him.

a/n: this was originally going to be released as my 100 follower celebration since i hit that a while back and to make up for the lack of event since i don’t have the time to host one. but with mysta’s graduation this past weekend, i didn’t want to keep this in my drafts since i’ve been working on this for like practically a year now.

this fox-dog man means so much to me, even though i can’t really catch his streams due to timezone differences, but he means So Much to me. i got back into writing because of luxiem, but he and shu were the ones who got me back into the swing of writing which is amazing bc i love writing. i just lost all the motivation to do so until i found them last year. even though he’s no longer in niji anymore or mysta anymore, i will keep writing for him. in fact, i actually have like 3 or so mysta works in the drafts lol

and speaking of writing, this is the first long fic i’ve written in 3-4 years. i’m considering crossposting this onto my ao3 as an alternative access to read longer fics bc ik how tumblr is poopy with loading long text posts. i’m a bit rusty when it comes to writing long fics, but i hope you’ll be able to enjoy this as much as i enjoyed writing this 🧡

links: luxiem m.l || main m.l || ao3 ver (if tumblr dies)

You twist your head from your phone back towards your monitor, displaying the Discord window showing your current private call with your blue dragon friend.

“Mysta’s WHAT?”

“Yeah, he’s coming along on the trip,” Elira laughed. “You didn’t know?”

“Apparent-ly! What the hell!! Luca, that motherfucker, I’m gonna beat his ass when I see him!”

She howls with laughter as you ramble on and on about how Luca told you everything about their planned trip but didn’t tell you about Mysta’s planned involvement. Once you’re done, she takes many deep breaths to calm down. “You should come with us! It’s gonna be fun. And, you’ll get to see him again.~”

You can’t really see each other’s faces, considering you’re both in a voice call. But god damn, you can hear the eyebrow wiggle in her teasing tone.

“I can’t,” you groaned, “I have finals when you’re there. As much as I wanna skip it, I really need to pass.”

“Damn, you can’t even get a referral from staff to get you here for a business meeting? Unlucky.”

“Can’t even do that anyway. I already told my professor that my trip’s been canceled, so now I have to take it.”

Though you’re not a liver for the company, you are, however, a staff member for the company. Specifically one of the staff in charge of promotions. Of course, you mainly focus on promoting EN and sometimes the other two now-merged branches. In fact, that’s how you got close to some of the livers.

As one of the staff promoters, you have to speak with the associated livers about PR stream offers and their convention appearance invites. Since you’ve been interacting with the livers the most, you’ve become friends with a few of them. Some namely Elira and Mysta.

Honestly, it’s not that you play favorites with the livers. You try your best to keep your relationships professional with them. But your bond with a specific fox-like man says otherwise.

You see, Mysta has been a joy to be around with. Although you haven’t met him in person yet, you have played some multiplayer games with him. Sometimes you check out the EN Minecraft server to see if the installed mods are working properly. Weirdly enough, almost every time you visit the server, Mysta is online. In fact, that’s how your not-so-business relationship started.

When you first entered the server, after double checking if no one was streaming at the scheduled hour, he was the first person you met. You thought you would run into Selen, Pomu, or perhaps Uki during your visit, but you were pleasantly surprised at his sudden appearance. Luckily, he was kind enough to show you around the server while teaching you some mods. With, of course, the trademark Mysta Rias experience packaged with sexual innuendos and teasing about. Well, except he didn’t go completely sexual considering it was your first time meeting him. He has some decency.

After that, you’ve run into him almost every time you visit the Minecraft server. Every visit eventually turned into hangouts, just you two (and sometimes another liver) chatting and building projects in-game. Soon enough, you and Mysta started to play other games together. You both played games such as Overwatch, Clubhouse, and sometimes League if you felt like torturing yourself for some reason.

Obviously, you had to keep the professionalism on both sides somehow. Your fellow staff members, especially some livers, noticed your close bond with the detective. So they usually send you to his DMs to discuss about any promotion offers involving him. Whenever you have your cameras on for a meeting, he somehow always flusters you with sudden flirtatious marks or something of the sort mid-conversation.

“Hello? Helloooooooo? Is someone there??”

Elira’s voice yoinks you out of your thoughts. Oh god, were you spacing out this entire time? How embarassing.

You clear your throat then respond as if you weren’t thinking of someone just now, “S-sorry, did you say something?”

“Oh my god. It’s that bad,” she mindlessly mutters.

Blink blink. “Huh?”

“Nothing,” she quickly retaliates. With a slight hum, she speaks again, “Since you’re gonna be stuck in hell… Want me to get you something? Like a souvenir or a limited edition thing? I literally have your address, man.”

Oh right, she does. Sometimes you and Elira send gifts to each other like figurines or plushies at random times.

“Nah, I’m good. Thanks for the offer, man.”

“Are you sure? I mean, I’ll still probably send some pics buuut… Y’know… Just saying…”

There she goes again, doing that thing where she wiggles her eyebrows even though you can’t see her fucking face right now. Goddamn it, why did you tell her about your… thing with Mysta? You should’ve known that she’s NOT going to let it go.

You groan, “Just. Just surprise me.”

“That’s so vague! Do you know what that means?”

“Yeah? So? Surprise me.”

“Man… You have no idea how much power you just gave me.” She cackles for the next few seconds, making you start regretting your decision. “Okay, I’ll surprise you. Just don’t forget you asked me to, alright? And no complaining!”

“Okay, alright, fine! I won’t complain! Jeez… Now get to bed, nerd, you have a flight tomorrow.”

“Sheesh, what are you, my mom?” You both chuckle at her remark. “Okieee~ I’ll go pass out now, I guess. Good night!”

“Good night, Ewiwa. Have a safe trip.”

And you both leave call. Well, maybe you should get to sleep too. It’s getting super late, after all.

—

Mysta stares at Elira across the table in disbelief. “Finals? Of all times? Bruh…”

“Haha, yeah! Super uncool and lame and not something I have to worry about soon,” his penguin colleague beside him laughs with a dreadfully crazed look in her eyes. She anxiously reaches out for her soda and starts drinking rapidly.

“Wh— it’s not like I can control it or anything. Shit happens!”

“I know, it’s just…” he drawls off as his gaze lowers to the table. Admittedly, it’s difficult for him to hide his expression. So naturally, the two girls noticed his disappointment. Elira and Petra awkwardly look at each other, then to him, then back at each other.

“Hey, it’s okay, Mysta,” Petra says as she pats his back. “You can always see them next time! Like Nijifest!”

The dragon nods, “Yeah! Or you could see them the next time you take a break. Like going on another vacation or something.”

“If I have enough money for it,” he sighed. But he gives them a small smile to appreciate their attempts to soothe him.

Petra frowns. “If? Mysta, you’re literally one of the top livers in EN, like? Hello? Mr. One Million?”

“But I still don’t know when that’s gonna happen. Might as well be in a year or maybe like half a year or something.”

Elira’s eyes narrow. She quietly listens to their conversation, or bickering at this point, while taking some occasional sips of her drink.

For the past practically a year, Elira’s been one of the victims to both of your hopeless gushing.

She already knew about your friendship since you’ve talked a lot about it before. She knows the stupid hijinks and drunken confessions that you and Mysta told her about off stream. Her eyes closes as a confused thought crosses her mind, Seriously, how are you two not dating already?

Of course, she’s quite aware that the rest of Luxiem are both of your victims. Hell, when Elira’s alone with the other boys, it’s usually them talking about how astonishing that you and Mysta aren’t together. Sometimes, they make bets on who’s going to confess first. It’s obvious!

Even with the two going back and forth, practically becoming one with the background, she closes her eyes and hums in thought. Finals should be finished next week, she mused. Her visible eye opens as she takes a glance at the ashy haired male. But he’s been so busy lately that they haven’t spoken with each other…

The entire EN branch had a full schedule for the past few months. In fact, their schedule was so full that sometimes the livers couldn’t make their own streaming schedules nor stream in general. Mysta, of course, was no exception. As one of the most popular livers in EN, he’s one of the most busiest people she’s ever known. On top of that, you too have been busy recently too. You haven’t been able to hang out with him as of late despite being a staff member yourself. Life really likes to fuck anyone over, doesn’t it?

She could tell that you two haven’t been able to find the time to talk with each other. The staff picked up many projects that practically almost everyone is unavailable, and you were one of said unavailable members. The only times the livers could contact you was through Slack or by email for business inquiries. But things should be slightly slowing down, for now that is.

Although, it would be nice to have you two meet each other once at the same time, even if it’s a coincidental encounter.

Wait a minute…

A devious smirk lifts her lips, her eyes glinting with mischief in mind. She chuckles to herself as she entertains the thought. Hell, it even looks kinda creepy to the other patrons. ESPECIALLY to her coworkers who’s now staring at her with confusion and a hint of fear.

“…Elira? Are you okay?” Petra asked the dragon.

“Hm?” She blinks out of her thoughts as the penguin’s voice pulls her back into reality. Elira stares at her and Mysta, who also looks a bit dumbfounded, before grinning at them. “Oh, don’t worry about it. Just thought of something.”

Blink blink. “Like what?” Mysta asked this time.

Again, she lets out a chuckle and flicks her wrist to wave off the concern. “Like I said! Don’t worry about it! Y’all will see it eventually.”

Soon enough, the waitress arrives with their orders. Elira turns to face her and helps her with the food. On the other side of the table, the two livers tilt their heads in confusion and eventually give each other an unknowing look as the table is served.

—

You lie in bed snuggled underneath your covers, but the lights are still on as you scroll through Twitter on your phone.

It’s been about a couple weeks since your call with Elira. She’s been sending you updates, videos, and pictures of the group’s adventures in Japan. Sometimes, she’d call you before going to bed to tell you what happened during the trip in case it was a story she couldn’t explain over text. Of course, there were times when another liver like Reimu and Nina would join in the call and give you the tea. As much as you wished you wanted to be there while dying in exams, you felt warm as you saw the livers enjoying themselves on their vacation.

Then, you noticed how fast the month flew by. Eventually, it was time for the livers to fly home and say goodbye for a while. They all had different flights, obviously, but there was a specific person who didn’t leave the country yet.

You were looking on Twitter while watching the members’ story time streams on a pop-up viewer. Although, you didn’t see Mysta’s waiting room or tweet indicating his return to streaming yet.

Suddenly, you remembered why.

“He wants to stay back for a bit,” Elira answered over the sound of her packing. “Dunno why, but I don’t blame him. He was in Japan for work last time.”

That he was. Though disappointing it is that you can’t hang with him for a while longer, at least he’s having fun.

“Oh, remember the thing I asked you about?”

She asked you something? When?

“What thing?” You asked.

“Uh… The souvenir thing?”

Oh shit, you forgot about that. And apparently, she noticed your forgetfulness as indicated by her laughter.

“I got you something,” Elira continued, “but I’ll send it to you when I get back.”

“Why not now? You can just ask headquarters to send it to me.”

“It’s not something in a box though.”

You blinked in confusion, unanswering.

On the other end of the line, you heard her chuckle, “You’ll see.”

Your brief conversation did, in fact, make you scared. Although it’s Elira, your local dependable dragon, sometimes she can be as unpredictable as… well… the rest of Nijisanji. Not just EN, but Nijisanji in general. Remember that one time you watched her stream where she suddenly jumped into a hole in that Forest collab? Yeah…

Now, some time has passed since the trip and she’s been home for about almost a week. It’s something not in a box, right? So what’s taking her so long? Is it digital? Or did she fuck up somewhere with the delivery?

Currently, you’ve been juggling schoolwork, personal work, and work-work. Needless to say, it’s been a stressful time, especially around this type of year. Seriously, why is everyone so goddamn busy around this time? Idle thoughts aside, you’ve also been anxiously waiting for Elira’s souvenir. For the past week, you’d constantly check your phone and your PC for any email or DM from Slack and Discord with Elira’s name attached to it. Every time you get DM’ed or emailed, it’s always been another liver or staff member whose name doesn’t start with Elira and end with Pendora.

But hey, at least you got funny memes from Luca and Mysta in the mean time!

Honestly, at this point, you might as well just give up. Maybe she did run into issues, or she just forgot.

You let out a sigh as you refreshed your feed for the umpteenth time tonight, accompanied by the ghost’s voice eminating through your speakers. Yet suddenly, a notification banner from Discord slides down onto the screen.

Elira Pendora

SURPRISE!!!!

Oh.

Huh.

So she didn’t forget??

Confused yet astonished at the same time, you pull down your notifications bar and tap on the DM to see what she sent.

As the iconic Discord logo pops up on your screen, it eventually loads your conversation with Elira. When you look past your previous chat, a message larger than it should be fills about a third of your screen.

A plane ticket to London next week. Seat number and all. And most notably, it has your name.

…

“HUH?”

You frantically tap on the textbox and type.

You

GIRL

WHAGT THE FUCK IS THIS

Elira Pendora

your souvenir! ☺️

You

WDYM SOUVENIR THATS NOT EVEN RELATED TO JAPAN??? 😭😭😭😭

also

HOW DID YUO GET MY NUMBER??? AND MY EMAIL????? :monkas:

Elira Pendora

I had to pull a few strings with staff

just normal coworker things

You

:thonk:

“normal”

Elira Pendora

but like you should go!!!

I didn’t go through all that just for you to not see him

and you really needed a break so 😎

You

??????

but hes Still in japan?????

Elira Pendora

yeah but he’s flying back home next week

I asked him earlier and had to like try to figure out how to get you to meet him at the same time

or like

around the same time 😌

You

man idk if i should thank you or yell at you

Elira Pendora

LMAO EITHER WORKS IT’S OKAY MAN

better get ready!!!

You

wait what about the hotel

Elira Pendora

what hotel? ☺️

i’m sure he wouldn’t mind letting you stay for a few days tbh

and yes I will also pay for your return trip

You

BUT YOUR LEN FUNDS……

Elira Pendora

I KNOW 😭😭😭

but it’s worth it! go get your man bitch!!

but :thonk:

I think I’ll try to pass out now since I have something scheduled tomorrow soooo

GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!

You

gn ewiwa :D

Well! Looks like you have a trip to prepare for.

—

The gray haired detective lounged comfortably in the AirBnB’s living room, resting on the sofa as he scrolled through Twitter. He let out a chuckle here and there, sometimes full on laughing whenever a funny meme popped up on his timeline.

“Meesta!” Elira called out to him from the kitchen island.

He turned around to look at the unusually giddy dragon. Confused, he asked, “What’s up?”

“When are you heading back?”

“Uh…” Pulling out his phone, he quickly went through his gallery to find a screenshot of his ticket. Once he found it, he examined the ticket for its boarding time and date then put it away. “In like a couple or so weeks. I thought I told you?”

“I don’t think you did,” she answered.

She motioned him to give her the device, or at least show her the screen. Of course, he complied. Though insane she is, he does have immense respect for her and Lazulight. Mysta stood up from his seat and approached her. Once in the kitchen area, he flipped his phone towards her, letting her singular visible eye take a peek.

Elira hummed as she inspected the ticket details then pulled back. “Cool. Thanks man!”

She walked away from the kitchen, carrying a glass of water upstairs leaving him even more confused.

It’s been three weeks since his unusual encounter with Elira. He sits idly at a bench by a luggage conveyor in the airport, waiting for his bags to unload from the plane. While waiting, he leans back into his seat and lets out an exhausted sigh. Luckily, no one is seated beside him, so he could just take up all the space on this uncomfortable bench. Still, he couldn’t help but reminisce onto their conversation.

Was she planning something? Was she just curious? What was she cooking?

Now, he’s back in the dreaded land of England, land of the beloathed. He pulls out his phone and immediately checks Discord. The EN server is lively as always, everyone’s practically home but the sense of energy radiates from the screen despite being digital. Like any other liver, he hops in the conversation a bit, sometimes memeing around with the others in the general channel.

Although, he noticed that your icon hasn’t appeared at least once since he landed. He was even paying attention to the top left corner of his screen for a red dot indicating your message. Normally, you’d send him a meme or something to see while he’s asleep or busy. But strangely enough, you haven’t yet. Maybe he should send you something? Or maybe call?

Mysta continues to catch up and reflect on the livers’ vacation in Japan on the server, his attention eventually caught by a familiar bag on the conveyor.

Welp. Looks like he’ll call you later.

—

Thank god Elira had the brain cells to make sure your flight isn’t after his own. Of course, she had to take in account about the flight times since you’re both literally across the globe from each other going to London. To avoid missing him right after landing, you were booked super early into the morning. But sometimes, there’s a possibility that you might be too early when he lands. And, unfortunately, that seems to be the case.

“He lands around midnight,” Elira told you on phone prior to checking in. “So you should be a biiiit early.”

Yeah, by like, 2 hours.

Man, what the hell are you supposed to do for two whole hours? Well, at least you have your phone AND your luggage. You could even people watch in the lobby. But that’s 2 hours!

What’s even more fucked up is that you can’t really use your phone unless you find the wifi. But airport wifi is kinda shitty, especially in England of all places. Talk about a British debuff.

You let out a heavy sigh and collapse into your seat. Napping is out of the question, even though you’re still kind of tired from the flight. Don’t wanna risk missing him by a smidgen, of course. So you ended up roaming around the airport for a while, getting yourself some drinks and snacks to keep you occupied while waiting for your friend. Luckily there were plenty of places to lounge while waiting, so you found a place to sit and enjoy your haul of snacks while waiting.

You did get to connect to the public wifi to look at some memes, but again, it’s the airport wifi. With how slow your phone’s been loading, you eventually disconnect yourself from the wifi after moments of mindless scrolling.

But then you realized something.

You have absolutely no idea what gate he’s in.

Panicked, you scramble to pick up your bags from your side and stand up. Shit, did Elira tell you what airline he took? God, having data in another country would be so helpful. There’s absolutely no way you’re gonna reconnect to the public wifi, it’s too damn slow! If you did have data, you’d look back to your DMs and scrub through your brief conversation from last night.

With a quick glance at your phone, the clock flashes briefly on the screen. 9:20pm, that means his flight’s arriving in less than an hour. Oh shit.

Immediately, you pace briskly throughout the terminals. As you scrounge through the crowds just to take a good look at the terminals, you ask staff for international flights from Japan along the way to help narrow down as much as possible. Throughout the search, you occasionally checked the clock on your phone. 9:40? Shit, his flight should be here now or soon.

“Mysta!” You suddenly shout, passerbys looking at you strangely as you start calling for his name. Your luggage rolls and bumps against the crevices of the floor, bags jostling as you promptly continue your search throughout the terminals. “Mysta Rias!”

Meanwhile, in the same area…

An ashy gray haired man stands in front of the carousel, waiting for the rest of his bags to drop onto the conveyor belt. He pulls out his phone from his pocket, taking a quick glance at his notifications and Discord. His mouth lowers into a frown, his brows furrowing in worry as he notices the lack of notifications from you. Did they really fall asleep?

Clink-clang!

Sunset kissed eyes shift towards the carousel at the sound. Spotting his luggage on the conveyor belt, he walks over to his revolving baggage and lifts them onto the ground. Maybe he’ll shoot you a dm later when he gets home. The handle on his large case clicks as he pulls it up, soon dragging it on its wheels behind him as he heads towards the direction of the exit.

You continue running and searching for him, frantically calling his name throughout the terminal. Your head turns left and right as you look into the surrounding late night crowd, your gaze briefly analyzing each arrival for any hint of his gray hair or his tallness. As you remain standing in the middle of the hall, looking for him, you see a tall man wearing small shades on the bridge of his nose. Gray side hairs framing his face sway into the air as he lugs his bags from the baggage claim and towards the nearest exit.

Without a second thought, your feet starts moving towards him. “Mysta—“ you call. “Mysta!”

After seconds and minutes of searching for him, calling his name and pushing through the crowd as you chase after him. Just a little more…!

“MYSTA!”

And finally… Finally, you see him.

With a clear shout of his name, the gray haired man halts.

Bewildered, he looks left and right until he turns around to see you panting. His heart stopped as he stares at you astonishly. The ambience of the crowd and muffled intercom speakers drowned out as he zoned onto you.

He looked at you.

The person standing just centimeters away from him.

The person who he thought was someone he’d never meet face to face ever.

The person who helped him find a reason to keep going even in the darkest of times.

It felt like hours just staring at each other. It didn’t even feel like there was an ocean of people swarming about and passing by. Without a second thought, Mysta slowly approaches you as if he were to scare you off. As if he didn’t want to wake up, if he is dreaming.

As he gets closer and closer, you didn’t make a move. No, you merely stared at him with wonder and excitement im your eyes.

You both stood across each other, only a few centimeters apart. He blinks several times, even pinching his wrists to disprove his thoughts. But he felt a stinging pain on each part.

An airy huff somewhat resembling a laugh escapes from him. Relief washes over him, and he whispers with a smile, “…Hi.”

You smile back.

“Hi.”