#which is a fantastic way to make money its great

[funky-vg-beats]

tortimer island (night) animal crossing: new leaf ost

[mejomonster]

Oh also when I start dropping the Red White and Royal Blue book quotes expect a FLOOD I'm highlighting the fuck out of this book

[capcollector]

BUNNY LEE SANTOS - SOLE SURVIVOR OF VAULT 111

PRE-WAR

Born June 14th, 2045 (32 in 2077)

Originally from Los Angeles, Bunny doesn’t really consider her life beginning until she landed her first modeling jobs. She became a highly sought after model, often photographed for commercial print and fashion, but she really took off once she began doing pin-ups. Her career as a pin-up girl made her famous, and everyone wanted to have Bunny Santos around. She was a party girl, known for her charm, quick wit, and dirty sense of humor. When it came to drinking and smoking and partying all night long, she could handle her own against just about anyone. 

After many years living it up in LA with plenty of celebs, Bunny decided to move to New York for work. The change of scenery was nice, and she was still getting to continue the exciting lifestyle she’d grown accustomed to. At some point around 2075 or so, Bunny was invited as a special guest/entertainment for soldiers and veterans in Boston, and she decided to attend. And though she didn’t know it at the time, this was a decision that was going to alter her life forever. Here she met Nate, a soldier who’d recently been discharged due to a leg injury. 

What she just assumed was a little playful flirting soon spiraled into actual dates. And initially, she really did have fun. A part of her really did fall in love with Nate. But just as suddenly he sprang a marriage proposal on her and she felt like she couldn’t say no. The two were married within a year of meeting. 

Nate was a very adamant man. Someone who could be a little too dramatic for her liking, but she knew he meant well. Nate was determined to reenter the civilian workforce, and he dreamed of living that idyllic suburban lifestyle. Bunny, who made exponentially more money than he did, offered to buy a nice townhouse or apartment for them in the heart of Boston (since Nate insisted they lived in MA), but he refused, and the two landed in the suburbs, much to Bunny’s dismay. Suddenly it felt like her life was on hold, cut short by forces out of her control. She was no longer Bunny Santos, the favorite pin-up girl of the stars who always had a story to tell or party trick to perform. She was Bunny Santos, housewife. But she’d flash that million dollar smile and put on this role for Nate because…that’s what she’s supposed to do, right? As she had her internal crises, she discovered she was pregnant on top of all of this too. She wasn’t planning on this, but in its own way it made her feel less alone. Like she had someone to talk to, even if he was just a baby. Having Shaun gave her something to work for (ever the busybee). 

THE WAR & 200 YEARS LATER

And of course, everything is completely upended. And though at the first the shock and loss seems too great a tragedy for her to bear, the end of the world became its own strange blessing in disguise. She found the freedom she’d been looking for again. She didn’t have to hide who she was anymore. Her life was her own again. That isn’t to say she wanted Nate dead, not at all. He was her husband, the father of her child, the charismatic man she’d met that evening who took her on some fantastic dates. She loved him. But she didn’t like him. She always felt like she inadvertently had to hide parts of herself to become this image of what he wanted their life together to be, and now that the world’s gone to shit and she’s on her own again, she can be in charge of her life once more. And her first order of business was getting her son back.

After stumbling out of the Vault shivering and confused, she predictably encountered Dogmeat first (after seeing Codsworth at the remains of her house, of course), which led her to Concord and helping out Preston. After aiding him in getting the survivors to Sanctuary, she gets directions to Diamond City and frantically makes her way there (though she actually ends up in Covenant first, but she leaves after a less-than-ideal encounter). Once in Diamond City, she learns about the Valentine Detective Agency and subsequently rescues Nick—even using her silver tongue to talk their way out of things with Darla and Skinny Malone. 

Nick and Bunny set off together, determined to find Kellogg. After Nick and Bunny track down and kill him, they land in Goodneighbor for the Memory Den. They meet Hancock and Maccready, the latter of the two joining them after Bunny gives him some caps, while Hancock just keeps an eye on the new girl for now. Intrigued about what she keeps learning, Bunny and Nick end up at the Railroad, saved only by Deacon telling the others of her journey so far. After some back and forth, Bunny agrees to help the Railroad as much as she can now (doing things like runs with Deacon to get her used to their system), but she makes it clear that getting her son back is her first priority for now. 

When she returns to Sanctuary and begins to help Preston and Sturges get the survivors more settled (as well as a little rest for herself), Preston brings up the Minutemen and her helping bring them back to former glory. Even as their leader. And she refuses. Bunny does not see herself as leader, nor does she want to be anyone’s savior. Preston disagrees, and keeps the offer open for her if she changes her mind. She agrees to help him out, but she does not want to be the general. 

Being her usual self, she realizes she’s intrigued by the Brotherhood of Steel, if for no other reason than she wonders if their obvious firepower would aid her in finding the Institute faster than anyone else. She’s rightfully wary, though, as she’s spent a lifetime surrounded by Nate’s military friends and she’d do just fine without having to talk to another one. But if there’s one thing Bunny knows how to do, it’s how to talk her way around things. And over the last year (well, last year she can remember), she’s had a lot of experience talking to soldiers and the like. She knows how they operate. So when she and Deacon happen to encounter Danse and his squad fending off Ghouls, they step in to help. Deacon is unsure of her gameplan, but he trusts her enough to see where she’s going with it. 

So for a while, Bunny has a hand in every faction. She ultimately spends the most time with the Railroad, mainly due to Deacon, and together with them they build the machine they need to infiltrate the Institute. But it’s around this point, right before they’re planning to send her in, that Bunny has a realization. She’s going to get her son back, finally, after all these months of work. And yes, the Railroad is gonna help her do it. But what comes next? The Railroad has their big plans for rescuing the Synths, and she agrees with their ideals, but what about the Commonwealth itself? It’s not like she can go home to California or New York (no one’s really told her what either of those places is like these days, oddly enough…), and she refuses to leave her new friends behind. They’re her whole world. Of course she’s staying here. But does the Railroad really have a plan in place for the future? With Shaun’s return imminent, Bunny has to ask herself: what is best for my baby? This weighs heavily on her mind as she’s sent to the Institute. 

Her initial meeting with Father goes as well as you’d expect. She feels gutted. Not only by the obvious age difference, but more than anything by what he’s become. The way he looks at her. How cold it all feels. How dismissive he is of the world and the people above ground. Her baby—who before all this was all she had, the only thing in this world that made her feel less alone—is all at once a force that is entirely unfamiliar to her. There is no relief in finding Shaun. He isn’t Shaun. He doesn’t even respond to that anymore. There is no grand catharsis, no joyous reunion, no love. She feels as empty as she does the day she woke up from her cryo chamber. 

When she returns to the surface, it’s all work for Desdemona and the others, though Deacon can see on her face that clearly something wasn’t right, but he doesn’t push the issue. 

Maybe she can’t save Shaun, maybe it was never possible. To her, Bunny, Nate, and Shaun all died in that Vault. A piece of her was left behind there. A part of herself she could never return to. But she has to deal with what’s left of herself today. Now. And she’ll have to deal with herself tomorrow. And the next day, and the next. So she goes to Preston and agrees that she’ll seriously help him revive the Minutemen (something he’d already been working on without her, but her presence will help expedite things—especially since she and Hancock just so happened to already clear out The Castle a month earlier on a whim), if he just gives her a little more time.

Bunny returns to the Institute not long after. She’s not sure what to do. She’s been given her tasks by the Railroad, sure, but her meeting with Father gnaws away at her. The things he said. The disregard for the people above ground. That same stubbornness, that same insistence. She goes to him again. He talks to her frankly, because surely she’s planning to live the rest of her life down here. Surely she knows this is what’s supposed to come next. 

What happens next is a blur. She is banished from the Institute. Did she do it because she wanted to get banned? Because she wanted the Minutemen to be in charge of the Commonwealth’s future? Did she do it to quell an anger she didn’t know she had? In an uncharacteristic display of vagary, she made a choice that once again would change everything. But this time she knew it would.

She’s alone in the dark when she’s returned to the surface. No one’s around. No one came with her. The night is uncharacteristically quiet on the walk to the Old North Church. When she admits to Desdemona she’s been banished from the Institute, Dez does not press for why. Deacon watches solemnly across the table. He’s not sure why either. And he will never know. 

But in comes the Minutemen, here to see the Railroad’s plans through, though more importantly to the Minutemen themselves, the future of the Commonwealth altogether. And when the time comes to finally destroy the Institute, Bunny asks the one person who’s been her anchor through it all: Nick. When they watch it blow up before them, amidst the cheers and congrats from the Minutemen, Bunny just silently grabs Nick’s hand and leans her head against his shoulder. Things can begin again.

POST-MAIN GAME CANON

Once all is said and done, Bunny feels a newfound sense of motivation, something to work towards and continue. She begins to focus her time on building up the settlements, especially Sanctuary and the nearby Red Rocket so Shaun (the Synth) has a nice place to live. She’s determined to make this work. She’s determined to have her life back, to be in control of it again, to do things right. 

I think in her canon the next big “story” she goes on is Nuka World, though it’s initially framed as Bunny and Hancock’s bender gone wrong. One minute you’re planning to get drunk and high and ride faulty amusement park rides then the next you’re in a fucking death match with a guy in electrified power armor. Once they deal with everything there, and after having several profound moments together as they reflect on everything that’s happened and how they wanna move forward, they get back to the Commonwealth. Bunny and Deacon finally make things more official, for one, and shortly after their return, Bunny and Hancock encounter Sop @radroachrepellent’s Cherry and save her from a Deathclaw. But more on that another time. This post is long enough and I’ll probably make longer separate posts for the DLCs and how they play out in Bunny’s canon so I’ll just put it simply that I think the DLC order for her goes:

Nuka World -> Far Harbor -> Automatron (a varied amount of weeks between each one)

Sop and I are working on a joint story together that we’ve named the “Electric Eden DLC” which will get its own post eventually, but that one takes place about close to a year after the events of Far Harbor. 

I was gonna include a section on the Companions, but this came out way longer than I thought it would, and I wanna draw a lineup of all the companions, so I think I’ll save it for that. I guess the important thing to note is that Bunny and Deacon end up together (here’s a piece of lore for them). 

MISC

Bunny’s strength lies in her ability to talk to others. Though she’s physically not the strongest or most agile, she can very notably talk her way out of a lot of things. She knows how to read the room and the people within it, and she knows how to use that to her advantage. A lifetime of schmoozing with celebrities translates well into survival situations, she’s found. 

She loves to plan ahead and be stealthy when she can. Since she’s pretty small comparatively, she prefers to use guns and ranged weapons so she can keep her distance and stay hidden when possible. 

She loves to pick up stuffed animals she finds on her journeys and keeps a teddy bear clipped to her belt.

Can handle her alcohol and will use chems on occasion. Social chem user, or something. 

Dirty sense of humor and fun-loving, despite everything that’s happened. She’s made a point to not lose that part of herself. I think her and Hancock deciding to go on a Nuka World bender is evidence enough. 

She knew how to lockpick before the war! It was a party trick of hers.

Okay this is long enough. Anyway I’m more than happy to answer any asks about her/her canon, and if you read all of this, thank you!

[incorrect-spideytorch]

So, I’ve been thinking a lot about spideytorch lately (as I am one to do) and a question popped into my head:

What is the most important spideytorch comic panel?

There’s a ton of great options in my opinion, but I think there also is an answer (at least for me) so now I am going to subject all of you to my thought process. Get ready for a way to long post breaking this down.

The most obvious starting point has to be this classic

Johnny Storm is going full house husband for Peter Parker, I mean c’mon! add in the fact that he’s in his undies and the way that he’s leaning over peter… yeah this is a classic. This might be the most famous spideytorch panel out there, but I don’t think it’s the most important one.

Another classic (but more antagonistic?) one takes place, of course, at the usual place.

To me this is peak identity shenanigans and the stuff that fanfics are made of. The betrayal, the heartbreak, the complications that go into the conflicting way these two view identity, oh boy I could talk about that shit for hours, but as an individual moment, it doesn’t really crack most important for me, it needs a bit more affection (they’re very bad at affection sometimes).

Another panel that came to mind very quickly for me is this set.

Johnny literally only had to say his name and Peter knew exactly what he meant and what he needed. This is top tier levels of communication, both between them and from the creators to us. I think this is another one that I could talk about for hours. That being said, it doesn’t feel important enough to me.

A friend in the spideytorch discord server posed this panel as the most important spideytorch moment in the comics.

I’m just gonna put their quote in cause it’s great. “I think this is one of my favorite panels cause Johnny was just speaking generally and Peter was like ‘oh my god! Actual wise words form johnny’ but also, I love that this was a more important moment for Peter than Johnny.” I must say, this entry is extremely important to spideytorch and gave my choice a run for its money. I don’t have a huge reason for not making this one the most important, other than personal taste. For their relationship, this is a key moment and sets them on the path to actually being friends (at least on Peter’s end), but idk it just wasn’t doing it for me.

Another panel I was reminded of thanks to this submission was this moment.

It’s not quite as impactful as the past one by a long shot but I do think it’s important. After being rivals for so long, to see Johnny give a genuine heartfelt compliment to Peter is fantastic (haha). This feels like the other half of the previous set of panels. There we had Johnny encouraging a stranger and here he’s encouraging his friend.

Some other friends in the discord server suggested the moment that Johnny invites Peter over to watch his sex tape (yes this is canon).

(Not pictured, Peter swinging away and saying he needs to take a cold shower). Now I’m not saying that the most important spideytorch moment needs to be serious, but I think this moment might be too unserious to claim that title. This moment was huge for the fanbase because holy shit did, he actually say that, but for their relationship, I just don’t think it was as important as it was to us.

Now I do want to knock out a few honorable mentions that I would hate to miss.

First, this look given to Spidey by Johnny, I mean yeah, he’s in love.

And to balance the lovesick flirty scales I must expose Peter as well.

Next, this heartbreaking moment that basically admits to the audience that Peter’s world becomes chaos when he loses Johnny. That shit hits.

Of course, the moment that gave us the ship name.

A panel that lives in my head rent-free because honestly marvel what were you attempting to convey here other than the fact that Peter really wants to have hate sex with Johnny Storm?

To take us outside of our duo, this quote from Ben Grimm (EDIT: it’s was Peter’s clone Ben Reilly, which honestly only adds more drama), because honestly same.

And of course, I have to include the panel which showed us the first time (on page) that Peter told Johnny he loved him AND gave us canon proof that these two have “date night,” many a fic writer was fed well.

And how could we forget! THE USUAL PLACE! Literally any panel mentioning this is top tier because its so good, like the core of the fandom honestly.

Lastly, before moving on to my own more serious contenders I have to share this parallel that @sciderman shared because I love it.

Now to my serious contenders for the title of most important spideytorch panel (please remember this is all my opinion and I mean no shade). This will be a top 5, but just know some of these rankings are pretty flexible (even flexible with some panels from the beginning), and this question should not be taken as seriously as I am taking it, I am fully aware of that.

Number 5!

So, I know that I discounted the sex tape scene earlier because I didn’t think it was serious enough and it didn’t do enough for their actual relationship, but I had to include this one I’m sorry. A lot of this is personal taste but the implications here are *chefs kiss* The first time I saw this panel was actually on Pinterest with the caption “wait a second, did spider-man and the human torch have sex?” which says it all for me.

Beyond that, this moment also shows how they reach out to each other when they have problems. Strange children show up in Peter’s life and the first person he calls about it is Johnny. Again, this is not the most serious, but I love it. This moment shows the banter of their relationship, how they care about and rely on each other, and also potentially reveals that they’ve had sex. There’s a lot to take in.

Number 4!

I will be honest with you all, this moment is here almost entirely because Ben’s quote lives in my head rent-free. Everyone around them sees how they feel about each other besides them. When they were rivals others could tell they actually liked each other and when they became friends others could tell that it was deeper than that. I think I especially love this panel because it conforms that we’re not crazy for thinking there’s something there but also because Ben specifically cites the way Johnny looks at peter. That is very specific and says a lot. I can’t imagine Ben would say this if the looks Johnny gave Peter were purely platonic, and just ahhhh, there’s so much said here just in one line from Ben. There was of course the Ben moment earlier, which I also love, but something about this one, the more specific phrasing of it I think just shoots it up my rankings a lot.

Number 3!

If you’ve been following me for a while I don’t think this is a surprise at all, I have already done a very in depth post about this panel so I’ll keep my thoughts brief. Red Skull knows that hurting Johnny will hurt Peter, Peter’s Spidey senses go off FOR JOHNNY, and we are given so much angst potential, I love it.

Number 2!

This one is probably a more popular choice than my number one, and I totally get it. The excitement and joy bursting out of Peter when he finally realizes that Johnny is here, he’s real, and he’s alive really gets me. Plus, the added context to the uniform comment being that Johnny literally left Peter his family and his spot on the team in his will. The amount of pure love in this moment and its larger context is abundant, platonic or romantic, it’s there. I feel like everything I could say about this panel has probably been said before, but it is definitely worthy of being the most important spideytorch moment, even if I have one that beats it for me.

Number 1!

For those of you who don’t know, this panel comes from Peter visiting Gwen’s grave and talking to her. That fact alone breaks me in half but then the things he says to her shatter me. Every spider-man fan knows how much Gwen’s death broke Peter, it destroyed him to lose her. Just the fact that Peter admits Johnny brings part of him back is amazing (haha) because that is a hug feat. But then he shatters me even more with his final sentences. After Gwen’s death, we often get a peter who spends too much time as Spidey in order to avoid having to cope with Gwen’s death as Peter, but also as a way to cope with the loss (he’s a complicate man). Spideypool also gets a lot from that arc because of Wade’s reaction to Spider-Man not holding back as much and becoming less of a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man, and that’s true. The fact that Peter feels like he’s becoming who Spidey is supposed to be again when he’s around johnny is huge! But then! He corrects himself. He’s not Spidey again, he’s Peter. The real person, the man behind the mask, comes back. And then you get the final correction. He’s not just peter again, he’s *Gwen’s* peter again. He is the him that existed with Gwen when he’s with Johnny. That speaks volumes and breaks whatever parts of me are left. How am I expected to read this and not think that Johnny and Peter are soulmates?

Now, I will acknowledge that this is much more of a peter moment than a joint spideytorch moment, much like the moment suggested by discord friend earlier. If that disqualifies it for you as the most important spideytorch panel, I get it. However, for me that doesn’t matter mainly for one key reason. So many classic spideytorch moments show a lot of Johnny having feelings for Peter or making a move on Peter. There have been a lot of times when I’m trying to get a friend into spideytorch, and I feel like I have to clarify that its not as one sided as it seems. Johnny is much more out there with who he is and doesn’t hide his feelings very well (except maybe from himself). So, when we get any spideytorch moment that hones in on peter’s feelings and love for Johnny, that feels so huge to me. This moment alone proves that it isn’t one sided, Peter has deep feelings for Johnny, even if he’s not sure what they are yet, he knows that what they have is special, he wouldn’t be telling Gwen about it otherwise. While it may not be as famous of a spideytorch moment, its an important one, and for me it’s probably the most important one.

Anyway, this has been a way too long post about this topic but if you made it to the end thank you so much! I would love to hear other people’s thoughts on this topic so feel free to share those. Also, just a reminder that these are my opinions, and I am not in charge at all so don’t take it too seriously (unless you want to).

If you’re interested in hearing me, go more in depth on any of these panels (or any other spideytorch panels) shoot me an ask because I could honestly talk in depth for a while about most of these panels and I would love to do so. Thank you again for reading this way to long post and good night spideytorch nation.

[punk-in-docs]

🕷 Don’t Need Telling Twice 🕷

Eddie Munson x Reader

10.4k words

Summary: Movie Night at Eddie’s place. All the little things that sneak into the cracks in between new love and affection. So I was intending to get a lot filthier with this but somehow it turned out sweet enough to rot your teeth- Eddie being insecure. Wayne being parental, Pencils being nervous. Let’s see how they iron it out man. (It’s really just me waffling about insight into these two lovebirds)

Saturday morning in your scruffy yet clean kitchen. Stereo cranked high. Melded into your happy place.

The bright slip and drip of the opening guitar licks to ‘Should I stay or should I go.’ Joe’s condescending spitting voice begins. You twirl around with the greased baking sheets in hand.

The kitchen is warm, it’s got this odd glow about it, from the slanted sun gushing in through the cream drapes that have yellow flowers on them. The shabby wood cupboards and the creamy tiles of the breakfast counter with its little peach-pink roses, which is now cluttered with baking trays.

Entirely rose tinted in your view. But you’re blasting the Clash. Loud enough to wake the neighbours.

You’re making cookies for your date tonight. Moms tattered pink apron hanging limp off your body from too many washes. Really it’s a scratchy old thing.

This morning did come around quick. Sunrise like a copper-red wound knifing slashes across the sky. Burning the whole horizon to that fantastic blood orange. You’re too squirmy to sleep. Too excited.

Seeings as you were up early, you put it to use and ran to the store. And now you were knee deep in cookie batter. Chocolate chip. Little starbursts of Cocoa powder and flour dusted everywhere. Head banging, head shaking and hair flicking along to Joe Strummer and his ridiculing tone.

You kick the walnut stained cupboard door closed. It’s wonky and juts out like a stubby tooth snapped off a jaw. It’s always been like that.

Every door in your kitchen creaks. Whines all aged. The appliances have their knacks and sticky tricks that come with years and years worn behind them. Temperamental.

Sure even your whole house is nothing fancy. You’ve never had that much money to scrape together, or give a shit that the whole place is dated. One thing wins favour over all that; your place is cosy.

It’s stuffed with life. Scored deep with it. Consumed. It’s not some ultra chic monotone black-red wasteland. It’s got posters and art on the walls, the crazy bohemian touches that come from your entirely whacky mother.

Sure this house wasn’t all that. But she made it great, and celebrated it in it’s own uniqueness.

Same goes for the best kind of people too. She’d say that to you with a wink.

Handfuls of pennies and some imagination went a long way. Clicking her tongue and shooting you her fierce brand of optimism that seeps out her every pore: eternally unflinching.

A lot of it, this house, echoed its funky warm pattern after the musical, magical, mental, woman who birthed you.

Forever hunting thrift stores for funky things. Weird shaped clocks. The Who posters. 60’s pop art. French Impressionism posters. Stupid cartoon lamps with Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck on the shade. Broken and chipped from the Goodwill but she liked that it wasn’t perfect or level.

She bought prints of famous artworks. Degas. Van Gogh. Millet. Flower drawings, or pressed leaves and flowers behind a sheet of glass. Not one piece of furniture matches in your living room. Or any room. The rugs are old and squishy soft, worn to death. It’s whacky to say the least. But you’d take it over any home they’re always flashing from the interior pages of a magazine.

She has blue daisy pillows on the couches. Always buys godawful cheap lemon candles that are all sugar acidic when they burn. But it cements that scent of home to you now.

There’s no inch of wall space not covered by frames or colour. One day she got up and impulsively painted your kitchen a bright buttery yellow. Just because. Flowers stamped everywhere cause she saw the idea in some hippy book.

And she filled this house with second hand books, too many, spilling over with them. She crammed your home with laughter, and literature, arts, and so many idols of your taste in music came from her.

You wouldn’t trade her for the entire world.

Flighty and bonkers as she is. You hate her being away so often, and with Charlie gone off now with her serious boyfriend, it does chip at you on the sadder days. Being here alone. It gouges just that little bit more when she’s not around.

The days when Linda says something particularly cutting, or times when jocks insults jab just that little too deep. You do miss her then. You can’t hate her for it. her job is a real earner and it makes her so happy. She brings you back souvenirs from every little corner of the globe she’s seen. Postcards. Snow globes.

She trusts you. She always says you’re her favourite kid in the world. That she knows of.

She’s not like some of the other Hawkins Moms you’ve seen. Not at all. The ones who all go to the same lousy hairdresser for the ruler straight highlighted bob. Go to Jazzercise on Thursdays. Hate their ignorant husbands. Wear beige cardigans and chunky gold jewellery and are the queen of boring casseroles and insist their kids be in bed by nine.

Then there’s her. Jagged and wound down and much looser. Etched in coolness. Less controlled - more quirky. Crazy hair even on a good day. Cherry ice cream smile. Young by their standards. Berkeley dropout. Strolling around in her suede fringed jacket and a Patti Smith t-shirt and boot cut jeans.

You’ve always seen the way other moms raised their brows at her appearance. They think she’s trashy. A single mom who dresses and eats and acts the way she does.

Scoffing behind her back at the rhinestone jacket or her vintage cowboy boots. She’s punchy. She doesn’t give two shits. She loves both her kids passionately and would be the first to swing a punch, split her knuckles open for you. Always in your corner. No matter what.

She had you both so young and braved through your dad walking out. Good riddance. He never did have the balls to do the important shit.

She told you that once you were just on the cusp of being old enough to understand why he wasn’t around.

Told you as she wrapped her arms around you and engulfed you in a hug. Smelling like Yves Saint Laurent Paris and gold Newports. She kissed the top of your head.

He couldn’t hack responsibility babe. He had his chance. Too bad he blew it. Cause I happen to think you’re the coolest pair of kids in the world.

She bucked up and scraped money together and it stung a bit sure. Pinched the corners of life at times. But she turned the back of her Brooke Shields shiny hair to the stares she gets in this town. Flipped the bird to those Carol’s and Susan’s who dared to judge her.

Somehow they thought she was a deadbeat mom. But she’s now raised two honour roll kids. First Charlie. Now you.

You’re on track for Indie State. Charlie went to Purdue. She said she’d love you even if you wanted to flip burgers or fix greasy old clunker cars for a living.

The phone shrills out loud as you’re scooping sticky chocolate chip dough into the greased sheets. It clumped between your fingers.

“Hang on.” You call out with no patience to the ringing, as you lean over to pluck it from the wall. Cradle it between your shoulder and ear. Trying to locate a dish rag for your smeared messy hands.

“Yeah.” Figured it would be someone for Mom, or a telemarketer.

“How’s it hangin, Pencils.”

Immediately a grin bursts on your lips. It’s Pavlovian. He smiles. You echo it.

You hear his voice? Ok then. Your stomach flew to bits. All fluttery like confetti.

“Well well well. If it isn’t my favourite metal head.” You say as you balance your trays down. Bumping the counter with your hip.

He chuckles through the phone. You hear the crackle of his exhale. You can picture his smile and it’s doing something to your guts that is just, crazy.

“Hey, c’mon now. Play fair. You never told me you were seeing other metal heads? I bet it’s that lanky haired bastard from the pizza place on Beechwood Drive, in his Slayer tees.” He twirled the old green phone cord around his finger. It clacks around that chunky silver ring of his.

He’s so quick to step up and play around and you love it. You can hear the jokiness layered on his voice. Hear him moving around cause staying still is his worst nightmare. Typical Eddie.

God. Look at you. You’re both twirling the phone cords around your fingers like middle school girls. Crushes thick in your throats and smiles. Choking your hearts fully. Paper airplanes tossed with love notes folded inside. Initials crossed together in a pink love-heart.

“Yeah.” You tease. “But his hair isn’t as great as yours. And don’t you know by now that I’ve got guys lined up around the block. I’ve had to have a ticket booth installed.” You pick up your wooden spoon to mix.

“Oh I’m so sorry, Linda. I thought I rang my pencils.” You hear the soft scuff of his laugh.

“Hang on one second, my lipgloss needs refreshing.” You pout. “And I feel like I should be singing ‘If I only had a brain’.”

He beams and it’s so wide his cheeks hurt.

“That’s not the Wizard of Oz I’m hearing over there pencils, right?” He deciphers.

“Saint Joe of Strummer. Our lord and saviour.” You tell him proudly. Cursing when you splodge a little of the sticky dough on the countertop. Looking around for the dish rag.

“I’m of the Anti-Christ church myself. Ozzy is my devil and I’m bound to obey.” He leers. His voice drops and it slithers between your legs to hear it get deep.

“Mmm. Sounds kinky.” You flirt. Trying your hardest not to drop dough on your bare toes where you’re scooping it to the tray. He’s a great distraction to your focus.

“If you’re into blood play and satanic practices baby, I got some great news for ya.” He fiddles with the empty microwave packets on the kitchen counter.

Chicken pot pie from two nights ago. The Kraft mac n’ cheese that he shovels down like air. Usually scraping it out the pan, eating it with a too big wooden spoon. As he reads a rock magazine at the kitchen counter.

“Sadly no. Dungeon stuff only. Oh and leather. Face masks. Lots of whipping too. And biting.” You tease.

“Hang on. Lemme get a pen and some paper… I’ll make a note…” He rustles around like he’s actually searching for it. Wiry body with the twisted phone cord wrapped around his torso.

You smile at his eagerness to please you.

“I don’t think you need to take notes, Munson. Last time was pretty sensational.” You blush. Mixing your batter and flirt is creeping onto your lips.

“Yeah?” He asks. “Jesus. You’ve no idea. It’s been driving me crazy. I should be committed. Look, I couldn’t even wait til tonight to hear your voice. I-“ He sighs in wanting. His tongue was tripping away from him. He drew back. Worried he was being too much.

He couldn’t wait. He had to call you.

“Munson. You never have to be sorry for calling me.”

Cause, I fucking like you.

“You know, you can call me Eddie. Pencils.”

“First name basis? How brazen.” You rib.

“Yeah, later on I was planning to show you my ankles. Risqué or what?” He flirts. You chuckle.

He’s wandering over to the window and flicking the curtain aside with his fingertips to see the same old drab and murky Forest Hills staring back at him.

“What would the village elders say-“ You gasp. “My reputation will be in tatters.”

“Not possible. Your name isn’t Linda.”

“I may have to kiss you for that one.” You warn.

“I’m very open to that.” He says very quickly. Twirling a packet of reds around the shiny surface of the table. Considering lighting one up. The rush of your voice is his nicotine until he hangs up.

You close a cupboard door and Eddie’s ears perk at the sound. “Learning drums over there?” He seeks.

“I’m baking.” You offer up.

Phone at your shoulder and between your ear still as you mix the dough with your other hand to fold in the chocolate chips. Shaking the packet and watching the chips fall. Plinking into the thick batter. It’s very messy and clumsily done.

“Tell me you’re wearing a tiny pink Betty Crocker apron?” He all but purrs down the phone. Licking his lips.

“It’s pink and frilly.” You drawl.

“Mmm. More-“ He rasps down directly down the phone. Grinning. Holds it right to his mouth to talk louder into the receiver.

“Pretty heels too. Lacquered hair like Donna Reed. Whole shebang.”

“Fuck.” He twirls hair around his finger. Almost bites down on his skull ring.

“The images in my head are so unmatched right now. You’ve no idea.” He charms.

“Damn.” He moans again. It’s low and it strikes a direct chord with your pussy.

Shit. You’ve had delicious filthy dreams about those moans. Your hands on that hard dick of his.

“Yeah and don’t forget my strand of pearls.” You grin.

He splutters. Oh he could give you pearls if you wanted them. It’s what he’s been dreaming of.

Such a horny boy.

“You’re the perfect date you know. Kinky as fuck, into whipping and leather. But pearls and baking.”

“You don’t even know what I’m baking-“

“You say pot brownies pencils, I’m gonna go out right this second and buy a goddamned ring.”

“Remember the four C’s. Colour. Clarity. Carat. Cut.”

“Shit. You want a diamond? Hmm I was thinking more along the lines of a pop ring. More in my budget. Or maybe something out the claw machine in the arcade.” He bargains.

“I like a man who puts in the effort. And, hey I’m not picky. I’ll take it. Diamonds are way overrated anyhow.” You decide.

“And just to lay your mind at rest I’m making Extra Chocolate, chocolate chip cookies.”

He cradled his aching throbbing heart. Hand splayed over his chest. Made a groaning noise like he was mortally wounded. A crackle of the sigh rattled the phone.

“Alright. You’re officially too good for me. I’m gonna have to hang up.” He jokes. You laugh.

You really hope he doesn’t.

“Don’t do that.” You ask quietly. “I need to talk to someone sensate. I beg of you.” You urge. “I had to listen to Linda bitch all the way home on Friday about how low fat ice cream sucks, and how much she wants to bang James Spader in Pretty in Pink.”

“Wow that really says a lot about her taste in guys.” He commented. She really was Tiffany-twisted, that girl. Wrapped up in her own over groomed looks, bouncy blonde curls, and sex life. Lived by rules out of Cosmo magazine and fad diets.

“My ears wanted to commit suicide by the time I got home. Thank god cause as I got out the car she started to mention the words sleepover and boyfriend and I just about had the sanity to slam the car door, before anymore came out.”

“Wise move baby.” He beamed.

You preened at the nickname that did dirty things. Finally you now had the cookies ready for the oven.

“Alright...” You clunked the wooden mixing spoon down. “First wave of troops going in. I’ll you know their condition after battle. Hopefully they make a worthy addition to our night as I am trying to impress you with my passably mediocre baking skills.” You charm.

“Hey don’t practice too hard now. You know us guys like em stoopid.” He puts on a southern-belle twang.

“If you can navigate yawself round a tree girlie. Keep on walkin. Them slick city fellers can have ya.” He drawls.

Your laugh makes his whole mood hop into giddy.

“You’re such a goof.” You smile. He couldn’t wait to see that grin of yours in person again. In a mere handful of hours-

“I didn’t need another incentive to be impressed by you, pencils...” He smiles. Tone slipping back into genuine. “Already there.” He offers.

Before you can respond. Hurricane Munson struck elsewhere.

“And uh, Whatever condition those troops are in. I’ll take it. I’m not picky either. Charlie. Tango. Bravo.”

“Good.” You answer. Twiddling with the corner of the dish cloth. Fondness settled like warm oozy mush on your chest. Inescapable.

You could spend hours down the phone listening to Eddie crack his jokes. Twirl around. Get distracted. Put on stupid drama club voices like he was at Hellfire

“There aren’t trees in the way of your trailer are there? Cause I won’t be able to navigate round them all on my own.” You joke in reference to his earlier remark.

“You’re the perfect lady.” He sighs in a sweet hum.

“Oh and uh, I picked the movies for tonight.” He suddenly announced. Sounding cheeky. Brimming with it.

“Yeah?” You asked with inflection. “Yeah.” He answered. With none.

“You’re not gonna tell me are you?” You clued up.

“Leave me to have my wicked wicked fun.”

“VHS tease.” You complained all snarky.

“Scoot your pretty ass over here and come see for yourself you coward.” He dares. Tongue tipped out between his smiling teeth.

“Six still good?” You check. Up on your tiptoes and swirling around the tiled floor. Stomach swooping with anticipation.

“Golden.” He answers.

“Guess I’ll see you then. I’ll be the one in the skirt.”

He sucks air through his teeth. “Ah same here. I hope we don’t clash.”

“Bye, Edward.” You joke. He gasps.

“Mm. Definitely gonna have to let you see my ankles now.” Comes his voice. Smile traced on it. You could tell.

“I’m counting the minutes.” You dip your voice low.

“See ya.” He parts. Slinging the phone back into it’s cradle on the wall. Smile charged to megawatt from your conversation. He wants to twirl and flip his hair. Goddamnit. He couldn’t keep still.

Then he drags his eyes to his surroundings. The crushed beer cans crumpled up on the kitchen counter, and the coffee table. The overflowing ashtrays. Trash in the kitchen. The dishes. The laundry strewn sofa. The dust- he chews his lip.

It was like he was seeing this place through fresh eyes. And it needed rectifying. He rolled up his sleeves.

Shit. He needed to hustle.

~

It was fair to say Wayne and Eddie had to grow used to living with each other.

The veil of constancy was Eddie’s safety blanket when it came to the gruff and earnestly stoic man, that was Wayne Munson; he pretty much remained himself. Didn’t change much.

Liked his bacon crispy. Made a peach cobbler that would blow your socks off til next Tuesd ay, but couldn’t assemble a sandwich neatly at all. Used to drive big semi trucks across the states. Did the crossword in the Hawkins Gazette. Adored Billie Holiday. Collected comical mugs. Liked strong coffee with cinnamon and had a dislike for cilantro. Loved old spaghetti westerns and that twanging soft country music he always hums too, which had carved space out of his soft-soppy Tennessee heart.

He had hatred for people with nasty gossiping sniping souls. Ugliness born inside, he thinks people don’t ever shift it on or lose that. He worked his fingers to the bone for the modest home and the little money they raked by on. He was unfailingly honest and generous. He had few words to give. He was Eddie’s weather-beaten yet reliable rock.

Eddie can imagine that Wayne getting to know him was more of a challenge; tricky to navigate; herding cats, walking on-knives-and-eggshells kind of difficult. How do you get to know someone when their character is set on shifting sand?

Thing is. Eddie never really changed that much.

He’s still the starry-eyed kid leaping on the couch, shredding air guitar to Metallica in filthy sneakers cause the moment just ran away with him. He’s the one making a huge show of not stepping on cracks in the pavement cause he’s down enough as it is. Not breaking mirrors, ever, and picking up sidewalk spilt pennies. And apologising and stepping over weeds in the trailer lot. Not trampling them underfoot.

Eddie was still the boy inside that felt bad for struggling weeds. The one to feel sorry for a squashed little dandelion.

Wayne wrenched open this home to this kid as a stranger. Barbs and shame-wrapped guilt set in his heart that he didn’t know his brothers own kid better than he did. He kept to his lane. He stayed out the way of his brothers numerous convictions. Remained a stranger to trouble.

But then, when need came knocking; he offered up, no questions asked. The way a bird offered the gentle lift of their wing, to something foreign needing shelter, in a warm bramble nest, from the raging storm.

Eddie will never forget the first words he heard out of Wayne’s mouth. Around the corner of some bland police precinct. Warm. Firm. Dependable.

“He’s my family. He’s blood. That’s enough. Kindly let me see him.”

He didn’t regret stepping up to bat for one minute. Maybe he’s grouchy and he’d never fully ‘get’ or approve of everything his nephew did, or enjoyed. But he didn’t chew him out, or pick at him for it.

He learned what flavour pop tarts Eddie liked best for breakfast. When he needed sleep or help. When he needed space. When to warn him to watch his attitude, or his mouth, or manners, and when to back off. Parental things.

Eddie was a stale eyed kid when he first met Wayne. Perhaps innocent and maybe just jaded enough to see beyond the rose-tinted prism of childhood. He was jaggedy-rough round the edges and not worn into himself yet. Caught up in the hard knocks of social care and down-and-out on his luck, as a mostly unwanted eight year old. That stuck some nasty pins in his ego pretty early on.

Wayne could see how Eddie kept expecting to be shuffled on elsewhere. Big shining eyes that a puppy would envy under a scruff mop of hair. Clutching all he had for dear life. His scruffy collection of tattered comics and stubby pencils and half broken toys.

Kept looking around the trailer like he shouldn’t get too attached. Sat gingerly on the edge of the sagging bed. Shouldn’t make mess or get comfy. Cause soon, he’ll have to pack his scrappy things into that sad cardboard box and eek out a wobbling lipped goodbye. Sad that home hadn’t stuck, again.

Eddie kept that empty scruffy little box sat in the bottom of his closet for six months. Just in case.

Wayne threw that box right in the trash.

Bought him a beat up old turntable. Put a shelf up in his room and a stood a few second hand fantasy paperback books on it. Bought him a few new things that didn’t belong to someone else first.

Wayne watched Eddie fall into stability. To learn how to put roots down. Grow steady and then in quick spurts, into who he was. In that way kids do. The way they grow into clothes that were too big. Shoes that would eventually fill out to fit their steps.

He watched the love of music come blasting in. Middle school. Rolling Stones magazines. Catching Black Sabbath on the radio one day. The appreciation for that loud thrashing dirty-steel rock he now loves. The one that ran vein deep. His idols with the crazy scruffy long hair. He discovered Ozzy and Axl, Judas Priest and Lemmy.

Watched him sew on badges that he bought for pennies at dime stores, and get bloody fingertips cause he really was useless at needlework. Found his signature rings at a cool vintage place outta state. Watched him saw off the arms of his denim jacket and come home with a swing in his step and a DIO shirt from the goodwill - a twinkle in his eye. Determination threaded in this burgeoning passion. Tip of the iceberg.

A plan Wayne. I have a well executed, thorough plan. Foolproof.

Mmmhmm. Is this gonna end up exactly like the last plan you had, kid?

Let’s find out.

Gone from the sweet boy who was too scared of everything, and everyone boring, and being judged, and now he’s turned inside out, full circle, to become this genuinely sweet young man, who turned against that boring tide of beige normalcy.

Eccentric and whirly with the unfocused energy that never burned out. Dynamite blaze kid. Even when he tried to hide scrapes on his knees, and raw knuckles. A shiner that he let his shaggy fringe cover, from an attempt to fight and claw back.

He still gave Wayne that shocking toothy grin with a fat lip and a busted nose, cause he was actually stupid proud of himself - and the way he stuck up for some freshman. The tiny nerdy one who had a carton of milk poured over his head by the meat head jocks. Having pages ripped out his science textbooks by them and spread to the wind like leaves.

Eddie sat beside the newbie with bleeding raw knuckles, cracked jokes, sellotaped those torn pages back together - wonky. Just to show that someone out there, cared.

The smiles became armour, devil horns and Gene Simmons tongue. The hair started to grow out into rioting curls. Doe eyes glinted promiscuity; to those who didn’t know him well enough to know there was no shred of malice anywhere in him.

Eddie collected parts of himself, the way someone would laundry plucked off the line- like the badges and pins he secured on his chest and flashed around for fun.

He found his first DND board and his dice at a yard sale. And then came that sweet head-muzzy strain of Colombia gold, and Reefer Rick and light frothy cans of beer on an empty stomach. He found acceptance. Ripped jeans and scuffed knees. The exquisite pin pricks of a scratchy tattoo the day he turned 18. Asked if he could wear the old sagging leather jacket he found hung in the back of the closet, from Wayne’s younger and more hip days.

The way he went full bonkers-gaga over seeing his 24 fret NJ warlock in the window of a music store in town. Bursting big heart eyes over it and saving up for months. Awfully tempted by the idea of some piercing, somewhere, but nearly fainted when he got in the shop. So that was the end of that. He founded Hellfire and he protected his fellow freaks. Scraped together his high school band.

Collected the little lost sheepies in armfuls, in bunches, so that no one within his reaches would ever have to sit and console that festering hungry chasm of being an unwanted kid, with nowhere to turn.

Cause Eddie knew well enough, it was a bottomless gremlin pit with gnashing teeth, and it would take take take as long as you bothered to feed it.

And all that learning and comfiness, and living, now it currently tapered down to Wayne not being at all surprised, by watching his nephew shaking frail little spindly spiders out into the doormat, talking soothingly to them.

Shooing them out off the glossy pages of his rock music magazine. Telling them to get used to the brave new world of Forest Hills outside these four walls.

“-And kudos by the way for eating the flies. Appreciate you for that. Sorry I’ll have to take down those cobwebs. Consider this your eviction notice.” As he jimmied the last one off the paper and it crinkled noisily. Bracelet on his wrist jingling.

Wayne is peering over the shield of his paper. Coffee steaming away in a chipped Snoopy mug by his side. Cigarette dangling from his fingers. Watching Eddie crouch right at the mouth of the trailer door. Holding it open and watching the insects lope away in new brave directions.

Pieces of clarity started to to swim together when he takes a look at Eddie’s clothes.

Different to his normal threads on a Saturday night; Either he’s kicking his feet into reeboks, shouldering on his leathers and vest to go out a party at some place, and come back reeking of grass and beer breath. Or; he’s shuffling around in his thread bare plaid pyjama pants and a ratty AC/DC tee, asking what’s for dinner through a smeary eyed yawn.

This is neither; he straightened up to go and neatly return the magazine to his room, as opposed to throwing it down to rest in any old place. Odd.

Wayne took notice of his clothes. Black jeans that were suspiciously clean of ash stains or frayed knee holes. His long sleeved black skull tee rolled up to his elbows, ink on display. Chest blazoned with a band name he’s never heard of, and down the sleeve too in gothic red. His hair was all fluffed up - like he’d finally discovered what a comb was.

Eddie saunters back into the room. Flitting from place to place. Shoving beer cans in a bulging garbage bag. Along with empty crushed food packets that he left out. Sweeping crumbs off the counter with his bare hands. Probably over the floor but the effort was there- picking cigarette butts off the floor that he was careless enough to drop.

And Wayne didn’t even have to shoot his usual look, clearing his throat at him, about that nasty habit. He was clearing up entirely on his own. Without prompt.

He was rushing. Rushing was the antithesis of Eddie’s speed. A thin film of sweat on his brow under that choppy lollop of a fringe. He’s crammed garbage bags full. Shoving stuff inside.

Says something under his breath that sounds like “shit” as he darts back into his room. Wallet chain jangling behind him. Socked feet thudding softly on the carpets.

He keeps an ear open for what sounds like commotion. Frantic tidying. The shuffling of clothes by the armful. Closet doors shutting with a thwack. He talks to his guitar as he hums and tidied.

“I know I know. Sweetheart. I should have done this earlier. Don’t look at me like that…”

He rounds up his dirty clothes and does a sniff test - again. That was the third time tonight.

Movement clattering along the hall. Socked feet storm back to the washer. He’s stuffing an armful of mostly all black clothing into it like he’s trying to dispose of body parts in there. Ramming in so much he has to shut the door quick.

“Rat bastard.” He hissed after he shook the dream fresh laundry powder in and slams it shut. Punches it for good measure. His rings clack on the metal-metal contact. Shook his fist out I n the air cause that hurt more than he thought it would.

Now he’s back to the trash bags in the kitchen. Looping them up and walking across the door to dump them outside in the garbage cans. Hopping across the sharp gravel in socked feet like a jumping hare.

Wayne sees that determined set in his brow as the door snaps open and back in slams Eddie at a million miles a second. Frowning at everything he sees. Sloped brows. Mouth curled into a grimace.

He comes to empty the overflowing ashtray on the coffee table near Wayne. Well, it was an old soup can that somehow turned into an ashtray. Annoyed that he missed it. Muttering to himself. Scooping away dust. It was like watching a one man ant farm.

This led to him now being stood on the couch, suddenly reorganising the shelf behind it. Batting cobwebs away from mugs and wiping a hand on his jeans.

“Jesus. I mean how dusty is this place?” Eddie asks to no one in particular. Not expecting an answer.

Silence. Rustling.

Wayne folds up his paper and nicely slaps it down on the arm beside him. Folds his hands in his lap. “Eddie.”

Eddie turns around like a doe eyed deer caught in semi headlights. Twisted at the waist. Back of his shirt riding up over his lithe waist. Peek of his back and his plaid red boxer band showing over the back of his jeans.

The bony notches of his spine poke through skin where he’s leaning over. He blinks owlishly at his uncle. One foot braced on the back of their elderly moth-eaten couch.

“What the hell you doin?” Wayne asks with kind bewilderment. Shaking his head at his kid.

“Spring cleaning?”

Wayne’s eyes narrow as he lifts his hand up and sucks on his cigarette. “Sure?” He checks.

“No?” Comes the answer. Carefully. Wincing. Wayne takes a breather.

“There’s cobwebs. And, dust.” He explained. Pointing to the wall before him. “Look see, dust.”

“Why the sudden aptitude for household chores there, huh?” Wayne asks as he nurses his cooling coffee.

To his shame they don’t exactly keep the place pristine. He tries his best, but on some days work takes it clean outta him. Eddie’s room resembled a garbage tip bomb-site most likely.

Eddie swallows. “You know. Just- some light maintenance.” He shrugs. That was the most plausible answer his brain spat out upfront.

“On a Saturday night?”

“I’m um, totally slammed on Sunday.” He admits. Clapping off his hands.

“Kid. How stupid do you think I am. Because frankly, all I’ve seen, is all I need to see. If you get my drift.”

Eddie turns away and continues his frantic cleaning. Polishing a mug with his shirt sleeve.

“I have… guests… coming over tonight.” If he makes it plural maybe he can get away with it.

“Your DND club.” Wayne guesses. This earns a snort from the metalhead.

“I once saw Gareth eat pizza off the canteen floor. Like I’d bother dusting here for those doofuses.” He grins.

“Then question remains; who are you dusting, and laundry-doing and taking out the spiders for?” Wayne leans forward and asks. Scratching the stubble at the side of his grizzled jaw.

Eddie clings to silence. Which he never does. Never ever does this boy exist without noise bursting out his mouth. Looks like a sheepish kid again.

Wayne’s gaze meets his. ‘Well?’

Cause he would support whomever Eddie chose to bring home. Girl or boy, or undecided. He’s no dummy. He’s got eyes in his head. He’s seen things. The little quirky tics in Eddie’s character when he likes someone. He knows his kid pretty darn well enough by now.

“A girl.” Eddie concludes turning away, like it was casual, cool, and nothing to get worked up over. No biggie. Just… the girl of my dreams. So what? I can be casual about this. It’s totally fine. And normal. Normally fine.

“A girl.” Wayne nods.

“Change this record. It’s skipping.” Eddie leers. Pointing a funny wagging finger at his relative.

“This girl. She royalty or something.”

Eddie cuts a look. It’s just bordering on grumpy and peeved.

“Listen, she ain’t coming to inspect the place or audit us. A little dust and clutter isn’t gonna put her off spending time with you, now is it.”

Eddie sighs. Itched the back of his head. Screwed his eyes shut.

“No. See man. I wanted to be presentable. Cause when she walks in this trailer, she’s gonna be expecting me to look and act like sleazy, greasy trailer trash. And I just. Wanna-“ he clenched his fists.

“Just wanna be….presentable.” He mumbled. Repeating. As he softly scuffed the couch arm with his foot. He sighed. Rubbed a dusty knuckle in his eye until stars scrawled black and bursting.

“Goddd. Look at me. I’ve showered twice. And I untangled the knots out my hair. I used that fancy bar soap I got for xmas that smells like lemons. I brushed my teeth for a whole two minutes. May have used a splash of your cologne. That stung like hell by the way.” He added naughtily. Pinching the collar of his shirt in two fingers and flapping it up and down to cool himself off.

“I’m sweaty. My hair feels itchy. I don’t know what I’m gonna say. She’s gonna be stunning, and awesome and I feel like I’m having a heart seizure or probably a stroke over here. I don’t know man. Fuck-“

Wayne let’s him get it out. As he’s learned with Eddie sometimes it’s best. He often just needed a ramble. To let his tongue lash til he ran dry.

He kicked the couch again. Harder. Still standing up tall on it.

“What’s she like, this girl. She into the same kinda stuff as you?” Wayne enquired.

It dipped muzzily into his big soft heart seeing Eddies mouth hooked right up into a petite smile when he asked about you. One side curls.

“No she’s, uh, she likes Punk music and Bowie, Talking Heads, Billy Idol, and like, you should hear her, she talks about all these artists and shit I’ve never heard of. It’s amazing-“

She’s entirely too good for the likes of me.

“She’s so cool. Effortlessly cool y’know?- And creative?! She likes scary movies and she works in the record store. She hates jocks. I cannot believe she’s actually bothering to look twice at a moron like me. Super senior, King of the freaks.” He jabs his fingers into his bony skull clad chest.

Because Eddie didn’t think it was exactly a secret that flunk out’s like him, were never exactly crawling in babes, or cramming in dates on the weekends.

“I really like her.” He mumbled openly. Wiping palms on his jeans. That’s what this effort all whittled down too.

He couldn’t meet Wayne’s eyes as he said it. It seemed to good to be true. His hopes were so little. Floundering seeds.

He wanted this to go well. He whirled his eyes elsewhere and fidgeted through his words. Typical Eddie.

“I gathered as much from your general-“ Wayne waved his hand around in the air of the living room and towards the kitchen “…Running round. Giving me whiplash just watching you, kid.” He stubs out his cigarette.

Eddie stays where he is. Stood couch top. Absorbing the information Wayne fed him.

“Why don’t you get down from there. Leave the dusting the hell alone. And just relax.” He soothes. Always a balm to the frizzy fraying nerves.

Eddie looks like it could be a trap if he dares to let himself chill out. You say it like it’s easy.

“She must like you to come all the way out here to spend time with you. Just be yourself. I guarantee you, that’s what she’s interested in. Not the state of this place.” He shifts in his chair and groans a little. Adjusts his legs.

Eddie let’s out a huff. Slumps down the sofa and throws his body onto it. Crazy hair flicking after he moved. It’s fluffier too. Some lame attempt at his own hands to pretty it up from its usual insanity.

“What you guys planning on doing?” He seeks. Sips his coffee. Distraction worked well, too. He often found.

“Ordering pizza and watching a couple movies.” Eddie says up to the ceiling. Scanning for cobwebs. Fiddling with the rings on one hand. One knee twitching up and down.

He had the stack of videos ready on top of the TV. Night of the Living Dead. Nightmare on Elm Street. And then Ghostbusters for something undeniably cheesy. The microwave popcorn in the kitchen. A number for the pizza place hemmed in on the fridge with magnets, as per usual.

Wayne makes a soft noise at the back of his throat at hearing that. A smile creeps on his lips. He idly reads the folded back of his paper.

“What?” Eddie quizzes.

Wayne’s smile grows if anything.

“I may be an old man. But I was young once. I do happen to know what that means.” He stared Eddie down in that parental way.

“You’re gonna be careful with this girl, right. Safe sex ain’t no joke.”

That did it.

“Aww man, c’mon.” Eddie choked, cringing, as he launched himself up out the sofa and quickly scurried away like a jangly pillar of goth black missile. Aimed sharpish in another direction.

“It’s a first date, by the way. I’m not gonna be breaking out the condoms and whistles and bells here.” He lets out.

He’s shaking his head and losing himself in the confines of his room. Music is softly shredding out the low stereo. Alice Coopers ‘Welcome to my Nightmare’ sneers softly into his room. He cranks it up.

Wayne stood up. Smiling and shaking his head in making his kid cringe. Gathering his things for work. Walking to the kitchen slowly to empty the dregs of his cup. Leave it in the sink for later. He grabs his things as he walks on past the front door. Heavy work boots crushing soft on the carpets and then the lino.

He walks right up to Eddie’s door, peers into the clustered metal gilded mess of his room.

Shocked to notice he could actually see the floor. And the raunchy pin ups were safely shepherded away inside the closet. The playboy magazines he pretends he doesn’t know about shoved under the bed. The dresser and side tables were still messy as. There’s been an attempt at making the bed. The sheets are straightened and tucked in.

“Listen now, you’re 20 year old man, and you have a zipper. I won’t say any more than that. But you best play it safe. Y’hear?”

“NO.” Eddie fairly shrieks.

“Not listening anymore.” Comes the answer as he faffs around and pretends to be busy with some things in his closet.

“Eddie.” Wayne smiles.

He turns back around and stands up. Expression of limited enthusiasm.

“Wayne. I am the town fuck up in a lot of ways. But not in this way.” He marched back to his bedside. Throws the blue Trojan condom packet up in the air and catches it. A silent ‘see?’

His uncles brow crooks up. Shuffling his wallet into his jeans. Pulling on his heavy fleece lined denim jacket. “Jeez. Those things still in date?”

Eddies face falls.

“They expire?” He flips the packet and looks at the back.

“Lord. I am gettin out of here. Save me some pizza would ya.” Wayne dismisses with a shake of his old head.

This high school romance thing was better left a young man’s game.

~

Eddie thinks he forgets how to breathe, when the buttery headlights of your car slant into the big window of the trailer.

He poked his head out the door earlier. The air is cool out tonight. Hung with moisture, so thick you could sip at it. Icy cold like a dirty clear martini. The kind of night that bloats up and leaves the taste of wet grass on your tongue.

The headlights are a sobering neon yellow under the cushy spring night that was churning slowly in dregs and streaks, to a violet. Lilac bathed air punched with cold. One of those night slow nights that gets slipped into dark majesty, and the stars cluster bright like winking pearls.

Eddie’s eyes have been on the windows for an hour. He’s paced groves in this thick matted carpet, he’s sure of it. Eyes set on the windows like he’s on a mission. Trying not to chew his nails. Got him acting like a pound mongrel waiting for their owner to come home.

The car lights flick off. Engine cuts dead.

And now he can hear the slam of your car door. His heart rockets into overdrive with scary amounts of adrenaline and stabbing excitement that will, he’s sure, undeniably make a moron out of him before then night is out.

You’re stepping up the creaky porch. He knows those snaps and shifts of the old steps. You’re knocking on his door.

He takes a deep breath. Fills his crappy sentimental lungs, that he placated with a cigarette, twenty ache filled minutes ago.

He cannot open the door fast enough, and the sight of you the other side, roundhouse whirls into his chest. Smacks right between the ribs. Fists him by the front of his t-shirt and yanks-

You’re like that song Wayne hums and taps his feet too, when he makes eggs on a Sunday mo rning. ‘Like being hit by a falling tree, woman, woman what you do to me.’

“Ah woman bearing beer. You’re definitely welcome inside.” He grins. Leaning against his door.

He thinks he keeps on imagining how pretty you are. But here you stand with the cheap orange light of the trailer washing back over you, haloing your body like a wash of heaven, and he’s gotta remember not to stare.

You’ve brushed this smoky-sparkly purple eyeshadow on. Nightshade purple like the sky out tonight. Big lashes all dark too. Your lips are pink shiny and glossy. (You so totally stole a tube from Linda, naughty pencils)

You’re wearing a brown corduroy skirt and a black polo neck. Long brown leather boots up to your calves. Your hair is so silky. Eyes shimmering this angel honey warmth at him.

You’re holding an eggshell coloured plate of Saran-wrapped cookies. Piled high and dark chocolate. In your other hand you have a six pack of coors and something else-

“Best part?” You begin.

You hold something up, tilt your head and there’s that smile.

The thing you hold, it’s all canine teeth and fake tufts of hair. Two triangle ears. Tacky acetic smell of plastic. “For the Heist.”

A wolf man mask. A smile leaps onto his lips.

“You think of everything.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “Got yours I hope Pencils?” He asks with a levelled look as he widens the door for you to step in.

“It’s in the car. Messes up my hair.” You shrug. You climb up the last uneven wedge of a step and move to come inside.

“Hey.” You smile. He liked that you goofed around first. Went traditional greeting second.

“Hey back.” He said softly. Pretty smile all wide. Espresso dark eyes fixed unendingly on your face.

You nervously chew your lip and gaze down. You want to lean over and kiss his cheek but didn’t want to overstep or be weird about it.

You clunkily flounder on the doormat. Self doubt lingers on your fingertips. You wish you could just escape into the confidence to lean over and kiss him like you did the other night. But then you had a belly of vodka and Dutch courage backing you up.

Decide hand him over the plate of cookies. He can smell the cocoa and sugar sneaking out when he takes the thing off you. “For you-“ you gift.

“Troops made it. Well done boys.” It makes you chuckle. Wiggles the plate in one hand and talks to the cookies.

“Hope you got a sweet tooth. I made so many.”

“Always.” He answers to your enquiry. “My diet is 98% Oreos and mini powdered donuts.” He beams.

You nudge the beers in your hand too. “Fridge?”

He takes them off you gently. “Yeah, here, gimme.” He bundled them up and stepped past you. The door snapped shut behind him and you took in the space as Eddie padded to the fridge.

You smile as you gaze around the walls. The scratchy orange curtains. The warmness of the lamps splashing up light. A very well beloved couch and all the mug keepsakes and hats on the walls. It’s cosy. It’s a home. Capital H. Just like yours. You can see that from one glance.

The Campbell’s soup can used as an ashtray cause the actual red glass ashtray next to it was overflowing with pocket junk. The plaid shirts yet to be ironed, crumpled somewhat clumsily in a laundry basket. Some sepia family pictures tacked to the space above the counter where the sun won’t bleach them. The red pansy pattern on the sofa that clashes with the lone saggy yellow throw pillow. The marbled malty brown carpet.

A place that sure wasn’t fancy, but had character and warmth in swathes more than anything designer and clinical green money could buy. It’s a sagging trailer sure, no hiding that. But you imagine with a cold shower of outside patting at the roof, these friendly yellow walls would swallow you up in their charming blanket of old cigarettes, male cologne and powder dreamy detergent. Some scratchy record playing blues and a snuggly throw on that couch, it would be a sort of enclosing haven.

“It’s uh- not much. But… a place to crash or to hang your hat, as Wayne says.” Eddie trails off. Setting the cookies on the counter. Nodding in jest towards the numerous baseball caps.

“I like it. Honestly. You should see my house. Moms hippy-bohemian posters and pretty strange sense of interior decor reigns strong.” You tell him.

“I’d like to see that.” He says as he clunks beers in the ancient whirring fridge. You smile over at him. You nod and share eye contact.

“Come through the front door this time though, perhaps. Save your ass from that thorny rose bush.” You encourage warmly.

“Awh. You’re worried about the state of my ass.” He preens. Leans against the counter and gives you moony eyes.

“Damn right. Someone’s got to be.” You answer back.

“Thank heaven it’s you.” He simpers. Smile

Slowly crawls up and your stomach warms all dizzy. You bite your lip.

“Drink?” He offers. Hands splayed over the counter. “We got Pepsi, ginger ale.”

“Actually, a beer would be great.” You nod. Cold buzz light give you some courage to finally bump your mouth to those soft sweet lips you adore. And had missed.

You should have done it tonight the second he opened the door. Damn politeness. You should’ve sprung on him.

“Two beers. Coming up.” He grins. Drums the counter with open slaps of his hands. Dives for the fridge.

You unzip your boots. Worried about getting wet marks on the floor.

“Princess. Your shoes are probably cleaner than this carpet.” Eddie explains wryly from behind the fridge.

Coming back to see you standing into the mushy carpet in your bare feet. Painted toes mulberry purple. Sparkles glitter gritty over the deep paint.

“It’s the principle of the thing now, Munson.” You say as you toe them off. Stuff your socks inside. You place them by the door and wander over to the jut of the counter. Standing the other side looking at him. His skin itches and leaps with the realisation of your smiling at him. He more than likes it.

He’s got the beers before him. Cracking them open. The fizz and the hoppy mist. He slides yours on over for you to catch like a saloon bar in a western.

“Mi’lady” He says as he raises his can up for you to crash them together in a toast. A tinny clank where you toast. His rings clack on the side of the can.

“Thank you, gallant Knight.” You flatter. After taking back a cold hop filled sip.

It makes you think of that slanted drunken time in Kyle’s garden. Sharing polite sips of a warm beer. Stealing glances under fringes and sparing longing looks.

You watch his brows raise with surprise at your choice of title. “And here, I thought I was the jangly belled jester dude. Or the scrawny but lovable bard.” He grins all toothy.

“Fraid not. You’re my Knight in shining DIO vest.” You tell him.

If you had to, you’d rearrange the entire solar system by hand to see the sight of Eddie Munson blush again the way he is now. His cheeks full with it.

He scratches the back of his neck and looks like he wants to twirl away and hide in his hair all bashful.

“You rescued me from the pack of Ogres and brought me healing Campbells aid. Not to mention some very seriously delicious behaviour in a closet.” You played along. Fiddling your fingertips along the edge of the counter. “That’s Knightly behaviour, my guy.” You nod.

“You’d be ok with being my maiden then, huh?” He can’t ignore the very bloated intent behind those words. Chews the inside of his lower lip. He can taste beer and he’s so aching to kiss you again.

“More than ok.” You met his longing brown gaze. Those melty eyes standing stark under that chippy fringe. “Hey, as long as you don’t think I’m the Dragon. I’m fine with whatever.” You hold your hands up.

His smile brightens. “I think we all know who the dragon is, pencils.”

You laugh.

His heart swoons.

And then it twirls somewhere different. He looks intent. Like he wants to grab something but can’t. Pent up. Like he’s digging fingers into the counter to keep from something else.

“Ok, excuse the shit outta me but, fuck it, I should have done this the second I saw you tonight.”

He suddenly bursts into movement around the counter. You follow where he rounds it in record time. Chain jangling. Socked feet padding the floor.

Emotions are chunky jagged things that can’t contain him. Slip off his body like oil slick. Beat off him like rain bouncing off concrete. It can’t contain him or maybe it’s the other way around.

He comes your side and you can barely have a breath before he’s cupped your neck either side, so gentle, and pushed his lips onto yours in a kiss so sweet it made your brain wipe blank.

His body cages you back into the counter. Tile top digging the back of your waist. Your hands flounder for a second. You smile to his lips before your hands come to his back. His belt buckle jams to your skirt and it makes your stomach flutter with want.

He tastes the same and it’s a flavour you’re oddly fascinated by. Smoky brush and hoppy beer. Maybe a little acrid but you don’t mind it. So traditionally Eddie it makes your knees wobble.

His thumb is soft on the line of your jaw. Savours the way He languidly kisses you out of breath. He swallows a sugary clasp of a little gasping noise you made. Wants more- more more more of them. He’s caught in your orbit and never wants to fall out of this clutch of your gravity.

Tastes the gloss off your mouth and he prays you don’t think him a massive perverted creep for this.

When you break for air, his lips don’t wander far. Spit wet and near yours and now he’s wearing sugar high pink gloss too. His nose lays along the line of yours.

“Sorry-“ He gasps.

He may have short circuited your brain with that kiss. Glitched something out for sure.

“I don’t see what sorry has to do with that.” You murmur softly. Leaning up to brush your nose into his. Try to contain this harsh vein buzz he’s got going in you.

“Inviting you over to my trailer and mauling you.” He gasps as he rakes a soft brush of hair off your cheek. Back tenderly behind your soft ear.

You push on your tiptoes. Capture his mouth in a slowly melting peck. Hand sliding across his cheek. Palming a cheekbone. Fingertips nesting in that dry wild mane.

“I don’t mind a little mauling.” You explain. He rests his hands on your hips with a self satisfied chuckle. Thumbs stroking the waistband of your skirt.

“Not very Knightly.” He quipped. Going dumb the way you plucked kisses at his mouth in-between his attempts to speak.

“Chastity is overrated. I’m not waiting in a fucking tower to protect my virtue.” You tell him.

You’ve got his fucking chest skipping and his heart is on the roof of his mouth. Cheeks ache from smiling.

He holds your waist like he’s afraid you’ll move or drift away. Ridiculous. You’ve patiently waited to get here. You’re not budging. Eyes set on yours. The wet gloss glimmer of your lips and those eyes he pathetically wants to stare into like he’s discovered a new form of Eden.

“I can’t believe I didn’t work up the courage to talk to you sooner.” Bursts out his mouth before he can stop it. A shy little confession that he feels very nerdy to have given a voice too.

“Wanna know something?” You tell him all softly. Stroking over the wavy tips of those choppy bangs.

“If not guess I’ll just kiss it outta you…” He decides. Eyes dizzily on your lips. His hips sway into you and he tilts his head to plant a sweet kiss at the corner of your mouth.

“I think I had a crush on you from the very second you got sat behind me in history class.” You explain.

You couldn’t help it. There you were all wrapped and stirred up in your love of punk and anarchy. And then in walks this crazy, messy leather clad and metal dipped kid with doe eyes and trouble stroked deep into his smile. The frenzy and the non-conformity. Clutched you good.

“Why do you think I always tapped on your shoulder asking for a pencil, pencils?” He teased. But he wasn’t done;

Sense slotted into place.

“Do you know why I call you that by the way?” He checks. Voice such a soft chasm of purity.

“I assumed the way I’m always covered in graphite and ink, and paint splatters.” You shrugged.

“No.” He raises your hand up and marks a kiss the back of it. “But I do really dig that look on you.”

“Alas-“ He continued. “Its because you never snapped at me. Never once rolled your eyes or ignored me when I tapped on your shoulder. You didn’t dismiss me the way everyone else did.”

You’re floored. Stood pinned to this counter and you’re so touched.

“You always gave me a pencil. Always. And you smiled at me as you did it. Didn’t tell me to keep it with disgust or bark that you wanted it back right after. Look at it like you’d contract rabies from being touching something I’d used.”

You indeed smiled at him. You asked about the patches on his vest. About the bands you’d not heard of. Told him the answer to a random question of the pop quiz if you saw him struggling. Twisted around and caught sight of the horned devil skull he was doodling and thought it was cool.

You lit up when he came into class or when he said something funny. And sure, he did show off in the hopes it would earn that beam of yours. He always felt like opportunity slipped out his hands when you scurried away after class finished.

He tried every day, to stay and catch your eye- make you laugh again. Just something to rouse that little kernel of connection he had to you. And when he saw you around you were always alongside the blonde one he assumed was too cool to approach.

“Wow, we’re morons. It’s only taken us this long to get things going.” You supplied casually.

“Pencils. Trust me. I noticed you beside that blonde poodle friend of yours a lot. I thought how pretty and awesome you seemed. Would’ve tried to talk to you, but I kinda thought you hated me.” He admits with a wince.

“Why?” You ask almost sadly. Ready to crunch up your own conscience in guilt.

“That’s what people usually do. They don’t even get to know me they just decide to skip right to the ‘hating my guts’ part.”

You shake your head. Boldly.

“Not this people.” You say. Cupping his cheek. “And I’d like to spend a lot of time proving that tonight.”

Your free hand slunk to his waist. Holding him with a perfectly lovely touch that has his knees swooning. Fuck it, yes. He could swoon too.

He smiles at that. And it’s so stunningly honest it makes the slippy walls of your heart ache. Lays his lips onto yours again.

“What’s say we order this pizza, get buzzed and uh, do some very dirty hand stuff on the couch whilst we pretend to be interested in it?” He grins.

“Perfect.” You slip up and kiss him again. Arms crossed over his shoulders. Body entirely pasted to his.

“Does this mean we’re officially dating now?” You ask him sweetly when you pull back. Not having moved one inch away. Engrossed, entangled and entwined.

“It better.” He nudged his nose to yours. And it really was as simple as that.

“Fuck. I wanna kiss you again. Can I-“ He started, and before you can even answer. Before your tongue can shape and push words out your teeth. He’s on you again.

“Baby. We’re way past asking permission.” You break away and breathily tell him as the kissing gets heavier, more intense. Arms squeeze harder. Getting closer when there’s no room to spare already. Crushed. No breath. It’s glorious.

“Don’t tell me that.” He flirts. If you give him free-reign, you’ll never be able to reel him back again. You just won’t. He’s far too, far gone.

“Believe I just did.” You tell him. Ballsy.

He leads you stumbling by the waist over to the couch. Smiling. Nibbling your lower lip. Sucking and his tongue sweeping yours. Knocking and kissing, knees touching. Falling and falling into each other again. You gasp where you awkwardly clash together on the lumpy couch cushions.

“Oh, you’re gonna regret that one Pencils.” He teases. Face all blushy and definitely love-drunk. Kiss dazed. Funny how you’d quite forgotten about those beers all of a sudden.

“Bring it on, Munson.” You urged.

~

🕷️This here? Oh no biggie. Just the next part of Eddie x Pencils 🕷️

My taglist for the JQ babes; @ceriseheaven @indouloureux @stiegasaw @fujiihime @youaremyfamiliar @captain-tch @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @svenyves @sammararaven @feralgoblinbabe @groupie-love-71 @andromeda-andromeda @starbxcks @morganamoonstone @ramona-thorns @gvtosbith @poppy-metal @munsonswhore86 @munsonlov3r @lunatictardis @shenevertricks1831 @hazzaismyreligion @harrys-tittie @anaisweird @cerinthussulpicia @cinnamoncunt @thincrusttheworks @manicpixiedreamcurl @therosietoesy @fanficappreciationblog @thicksexxualtension @tvserie-s-world @sharp-and-swift @dadsbongos @2clones-1kamino @edsforehead @chcolateeyelver @seven-glass-kids @forever-is-not-for-everyone @creme-bruhlee @bkish @wayward-rose @wyverntatty @latenighttalkingwithgrapejuice @churchmuffins @chickpeadumpsterfire @choke-me-levi @prozacandnicotine @xeddiesbattattsx

~

[jmdbjk]

Wow.

I can't leave to enjoy a few days vacation without the world falling apart?

Hybe vs. Min HeeJin. Not on anyone's bingo card this year. I have not caught up on everything but who tipped off Hybe about her dastardly plans? The timing of it all... and her little extemporaneous skit she did for a press conference was perhaps part of her plan to turn public opinion in her favor? She claims to have invented kpop or at least made it what it is today but out the other side of her mouth says she hates idol culture?

Hybe's not here to play, they will not be nice. I see no benefit to her for showing us the not so pretty side of the idol industry. Maybe that's her problem, she can't see what she's doing because she's too far into it. Thirty years in the business will make you lose your objectivity. She has no idea she is coming across as a greedy, spoiled, entitled, manipulative, narcissistic, emotional female in a male dominated industry. Basically a nut case.

The lady had a tremendous opportunity to perhaps take ownership of her company in due time, become a great example for female leadership in a country where corporate culture is steeped in chaebolism. Instead she squandered that and thinks she will come out on top. Did she miss the Hybe vs. SM Entertainment episode from last year?

Anyway.

RM's new album! RPWP!

The Monochrome pop up store is doing well!

Jin will be back after 6 Fridays!

In other news. I went to Las Vegas. This is what I saw:

The Bellagio Fountains. They're huge. The Bellagio is SWANK. I looked for Jimin in Dior and Tiffany, Hobi in the Louis Vuitton store, Namjoon in the Bottega Veneta store, but none of them were in there. There was no Calvin Klein store.

When Hobi, JK and Tae were there watching the fountains dance to Dynamite, they were standing here:

Passed by Allegiant Stadium a few times. It's huge.

Drove out to Seven Magic Mountains. I am happy to report the lowest boulders had no writing or graffiti. They were amazingly huge as you can see.

Joon's pic of the above rocks:

Went to AREA 15 and it was HUGE and amazing! It's impossible to show everything that its about, there are multiple buildings and installations and activities, gift shops, bars, etc. We went into the Omega Mart (mega art) experience which led to a maze of fantastically created chambers, each different from the last one, all pulsing with animated lights, texture walls, ceilings and floors.

And ate at Hobak Korean BBQ. We couldn't find out which tables the members of BTS sat at but I got a pic of the Butter album they all signed. There were other autographs from other famous Korean celebs but the BTS signatures were displayed in a more prominent place on the wall.

We also scoped out The Sphere. Also HUGE. The concert space is arena sized. I don't know who was playing there that night but the parking lot was filling up.

We also walked the Strip.

The Fremont Street Experience. That's an animated video screen overhead with ziplines running through the length of it. It's two blocks of casinos, restaurants and gift shops. People are also doing busking and shows at street level.

Hoover Dam, view of the dam from the highway bridge and view of the highway bridge from the dam. Spent a few minutes on the Arizona side.

Hiked in the desert. Saw cactus and wildlife. Drank a lot of water.

Drove to the Mojave Desert Preserve in California just to say we did.

We hated leaving. It was a fun trip. But damn, I have so much stuff to catch up on now. Hiatus my ass.

If Vegas is on the BTS comeback tour I promise I will be there this time.

We gambled at the airport on our way out. The slot machines were next to our gate. And in the baggage claim area. But as you can see, its not just about gambling there.

In case you didn't get it, everything in Vegas is HUUUGGE and FARRRR. Walk a lot, spend a lot of money.

Overall, Las Vegas was clean, the people were extremely friendly and welcoming of course, they might be teaching hospitality as a school subject there, I don't know.

[firedragon1321]

Note- This post is edited. Reason is at the end. Please reblog the edited version as the original is unintentionally albiest.

I joke and laugh about Leon Pokemon being a dummy idiot (affectionate). He can't even find his way to the largest building in a city without assistance. But. Like. I started thinking about all the ways Chairman Rose took advantage of that over the years. Telling Leon what to say. How to act. Who to be. To say nothing of the sponsors on his cape. How much power do they have over Leon's persona? Where does he end and they begin?

And THEN I thought about how the League works in Galar. It's just...a much bigger thing than elsewhere in the Pokemon world. Simple gym battles take place in massive stadiums. How many of these battles occur per week, let alone per day? They are part of every person's life, even if they are just a spectator. And the sponsors/League controls the entire circus. Rose's intentions weren't fantastic. You expect me to trust the nameless corporations?

Also, how many Pokemon were scooped out of the Wild Area to train for glory, for a sponsor, for money, for power? How many were thrown away, unable to measure up to the standards of an extraordinarily complicated and demanding League? How many Trainers only care about being as strong as Leon, not caring about the well-being of their Pokemon?

We saw Hop do this. Admittedly, he is not malicious and Bede was crawling under his skin. But there are malicious Trainers out there. If not for the fact you need a sponsorship to participate in the League- this bottlenecking how many Trainers can participate- Galar's ecosystem would be in fucking shambles.

And speaking of Bede, his entire identity revolved around victory and power thanks to- surprise surprise- Chairman Rose. Only when he met Opal did he finally reach his potential...and even that involved shifting from Psychic types to Fairy types. Meaning his Duosion and Gothorita had to be either released or retired.

And I didn't forget about Piers the Rat Man and Spikemuth. Rose told Piers to move to a far away location with a Power Spot to enable flashy Dynamax battles. Piers told him to fuck off. Thus his gym is in backwater nowhere where few Trainers dare to dread and the whole town has been swallowed by crime and poverty. Did I mention Piers blames himself for Spikemuth's current state? Meanwhile, this is- once again- Rose and the League/sponsors having more power than anyone has the right to possess.

Combining these factors, you get a society in which the Trainer and Pokemon- provided they are strong enough- are a product. A commodity. Something to wow audiences and nothing more. Trainers like Hop are left in the shadows of the greats. But the greats are decaying giants, dangling from slowly snapping puppet strings.

This system doesn't go away because Rose is gone. In fact, Leon takes over as League Chairman. But how much of the new leadership is really Leon? Outside of battle, the man has his struggles. I can see the Battle Tower and Galarian Star Tournament being his ideas. But there's more to running the League than that. How many people- including his sponsors- are vying for power in the background?

If I didn't sell you on Galar being a dystopian nightmare yet, there is so much pollution the local Corsola are effectively zombies. Much of it probably comes from the stadiums- powering the screens, keeping the lights on at night, possibly energy from Dynamaxing. Electric-type Pokemon could debatably cut down on the pollution but like- how many Pikachu do you need?

It's a shame there was so much sleeping on SwSh because there's so much insidiously good shit bubbling just under the surface. I think if it was canonically explored people would like Gen 8 more (even if it ended with a reinforcement of status quo like Gen 5). But GameFreak had been afraid to make digs at its own formula since Black and White. The League does exist in other regions, albeit it's not as secretly dark as this. Addressing the Galar League could put a foot in the door to question the entire series.

EDIT- It has been brought to my attention that Leon is smarter than he looks, refusing to cooperate with the Darkest Day plot. More importantly to this edit, he may also be interpreted as disabled, making parts of this post unintentionally come off as albiest. As an autistic person, I apologize for this. However- as it's been reblogged a few times and Leon having a disability is not proved by canon- I chose to leave the text as-is- save for eliminating one joke that went too far- and attached a tw for albiesm. I am deeply sorry.

[adobe-outdesign]

oooo how about the krawk next? aka the forever wooden spoon award holder

Krawks for many years were known as a status symbol pet alongside Draiks, due to being a restricted pet—instead of just being able to create one, you either had to shell out of a lot of money to get a morphing potion, or shell out a lot of money to obtain a Krawk petpet. Thankfully, re-releases in recent years have helped make Krawks fairly obtainable.

Which is good, as I always thought having a petpet that becomes a Neopet is a really unique and fun idea, but making it near-impossible to get the pet in question...is not.

Visually, Krawks are basically alligators/crocodiles, but features like them being bipedal and having back spikes (sometimes portrayed more like fur, it's not very consistent) along with their markings help give them some flavor. I like the very reptile-like head shape in particular with the jagged mouth as well as the spots.

The base colors are pretty good, though not terribly consistent—the blue has cyan accents, the green has darker accents, the yellow has lighter accents, and the red is super low-contrast. Still, not a huge deal, as they look good regardless.

Not much changed with Krawks post-customization, other than them gaining larger pupils and losing their foot claws/sass. The customized version looks better overall in terms of linework and shading, and the anatomy has been improved in areas like the legs and arms.

Favorite Colours:

Camouflage: Taking the crocodile traits to their natural conclusion, the camouflage Krawk looks great. I love the natural muted palette contrasted with the bright yellow and green eye, and how the color subtly shifts from green to brown. The spots are nice and don't feel too uniform. It's also nice how this color improves the basic shading with more highlights and more shadows, making for a fantastic colour overall.

Maraquan: Krawks are at least semi-aquatic as is, but the Maraquan Krawk takes it to its logical conclusion by dropping the legs in favor of a tail and some fins. I like how the back spines have become sea dragon-esq camouflage, how the eye lost its iris and uses a light yellow against the darker teal base for contrast, and how the markings look very natural (kind of like the camo Krawk above).

The customized version is alright, but the UC/styled is definitely better here. Not only does it have a really nice subtle scale texture to it, but the subtle changes to the head anatomy really make it. The back spines also look less cluttered, the pose is more dynamic, and the hands are proper fins.

Royal: While nothing usual for the color, the royal Krawks look pretty darn nice. Both versions are equal in design, having similar outfits, staffs, etc., and both fit the Krawk's design nicely. I think I prefer the Royalgirl over all, but the Royalboy has the better palette with the complimentary yellows.

The UC/styled versions are once again the best ones, as a lot got lost in translation, like how the converted Royalgirl lacks eyeliner and hair for no reason, or how the staffs are way too big, or how the Royalboy's beard is distressingly detailed. The poses and slightly unique anatomy are also great and give them some extra personality.

BONUS: Another unfortunate victim of conversion, the UC/styled Tyrannian Krawk is (most likely) a dimetrodon, complete with a semi-quadrupedal pose and huge back fine. The converted version not only screws up details like the claws, but also is forced to be fully bipedal and lose things like the eyebrow ridges and shorter head spikes. A shame. The original still looks great though. Only complaint with both is that the colors are messy; too many shades of orange and brown tossed together with too little consistency, and barely visible striping that should've been like two times lighter.

[lena-in-a-red-dress]

Kara gets roped into the RenFaire scene one summer as a face painter because a) she's an art major, and b) she's an art major who needs money. Her friend Nia has worked concessions there since she was old enough to get her workers permit, and swears to Kara that its a great place to work if she doesn't mind the occasional heat wave.

Which, to Nia's credit, is true. Except what Nia forgets to mention is that the resident RenFaire fiddler will make Kara feel like she's living in a permanent heat wave.

The fiddler's name is Lena, and she's gorgeous. Long raven locks and skin like ivory, wearing frocks of green leaves and shimmering wings, she looks like something out of a fairytale.

There's an invisible threshold between the summerbounders and those who have made the Faire their home, marked only by how naturally they fit in their medieval, fantastical roles. Summerbounders, like Kara, throw themselves into it with all the good-hearted cheesey pomp they can muster. The others, well-- they simply are their roles.

Lena is of the latter group. She was raised in the Faire, after all, spending her summers flitting between booths while her mother sold charms to enchanted patrons. But even when her mother passed, Lena didn't want for love. The Faire is her family too.

For her part, Lena immediately takes a shine to Kara, quickly noting her kindness towards children while she paints whimsical designs on cheeks and foreheads. But when Kara seems to clam up and shut down any time Lena comes anywhere close, Lena learns to keep a relative distance. Kara isn't about to approach Lena herself, so they fall into a pattern of mutual admiration from afar.

Until Nia asks Kara how she likes Lena (bc Nia lowkey shipped them when she suggested the job to Kara), and is surprised to learn they have yet to have a single meaningful conversation.

All right. That's it.

Nia invites Kara to a sleepover at the faire grounds overnight, for those who camp there-- among which is Lena. Surely, with the glitter wiped away and the lack of wings Kara will be less blinded and more... personable.

Except that after getting some mead in her system, Kara is even more entranced by Lena. How could she not be, with a speck of overlooked glitter on Lena's neck, glinting merrily in the firelight, and her long dark hair let loose around her shoulders.

But now, mellowed by said mead, Kara can't bring herself to look away when Lena catches her staring. Their eyes lock, and Lena's surprise soon gives way to a blush, then a smile as warm as the fire between them.

Lena doesn't play her fiddle this night-- everyone is pleasantly tired, and content to lounge on their logs and stumps. But someone does pull out a lyre, and Kara does notice that Lena softly sings along to the tune most everyone seems to know.

When Nia and another of the folks seated next to Kara rises to fetch a refill of their tankards, Kara blinks to find a new figure filling their empty seats.

"Hi," Lena greets, her voice low in her throat. The sound is heady, buzzing deep in Kara's core.

"Hey," Kara returns. Thankfully, the drink has smoothed her tongue, eliminating the stammer that previously caught in her throat had Lena approached her at the face painting station.

"You've been avoiding me," she's told.

Kara grimaces. "Kinda... I'm sorry."

"Well, so long as it's not because I smell bad...."

Though of course now Kara breathes in, and her lungs fill with the scent of woodsmoke and pine, and something floral. The floral, she surmises, is Lena.

To be sure, Kara leans in and inhales once again, this time with her nose just brushing the side of Lena's neck. The floral is in fact Lena. Kara notes the jumping pulse point in before her eyes and the catch in Lena's breath.

"Nope," she pulls back languidly, letting a goofy grin spread across her features. "You don't stink."

They're still perilously close, and Kara watches how Lena's gaze jumps from her eyes to her lips and back again. How has she missed this, Kara marvels at herself. To have missed Lena's interest in her is... a travesty.

Lena's head is turned towards her like the rest of the group has fallen away, and perhaps they have-- Kara takes little note of them.

"You're very smooth for someone who's been scared to be within ten feet of me."

"What can I say?" Kara shrugs. "I know to be wary of the fair folk."

"Fair or faire?" Lena teases.

Kara smirks. "I'm sure both are equally dangerous."

"Then you're doomed, considering I already have your name."

Suddenly Kara's brain shortcircuits as Lena leans in, eyes slipping shut as their lips come near enough to brush as Lena speaks.

"Kara."

[katyawriteswhump]

The freak in the penthouse part 4.1

E-rated (for sexual content), accidental millionaire eddie/sex-worker steve.

On tumblr: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3.1 Part 3.2 or search #thefreakinthepenthouse

On AO3

4.1 Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen

After they got out of the plunge pool, Eddie ordered champagne. It arrived mega fast. Steve grabbed the ice-bucket and said, “Balcony?”

He was gone before Eddie could answer. Eddie sheathed himself in his bathrobe as a surrogate comfort blanket. He braced himself to follow Steve somewhere he’d not been for several weeks.

The not-so-great outdoors.

Still, it wasn’t like Eddie was moseying into a packed mall. He took a drag of the stellar-quality Gamja Dustin had sent over and shuffled out. Steve handed him champagne, and he took a nerve-steadying sip.

“Holy shit!” shouted Eddie. “Check out that sunset.” 

“It’s wild. This place pisses all over the Carlton Ritz.” Steve levelled at Eddie’s side, leaning with his elbows on the balustrade. He wore only his tiny hotpants, which nearly distracted Eddie from a renewed fizz of unease:

“You get around, don’t ya, big boy? Worked in all the best hotels?”

Steve shrugged, fixing on the shimmering Hollywood Hills.

“Want a joint?” asked Eddie.

“I’ll pass.” Instead, Steve grabbed a strawberry from a bowl he’d dumped on a nearby sunbed. He tossed it in the air, catching it in his mouth.

Eddie grinned like an idiot. “I totally didn’t order those.”

“They come with the champagne.” Steve dabbed a red juicy smudge from his chin. “They bring out the flavor. Try it.”

He pressed a strawberry to Eddie’s lips, and Eddie wasn’t gonna refuse entry. He bit the strawberry and washed it down with champagne. Steve hadn’t lied—the flavor partied, sweet and sour and fizzy on his tongue. With a smirk, Steve popped another strawberry in his own mouth, then leaned forward for Eddie to bite it.

The kiss was inevitable. Eddie ditched his wine and even his joint, wrapped his arms around Steve, and clung. Steve aced the kiss, clinging too, fingers hooking so tight in Eddie’s hair they tangled and tugged.

Yup, he’s fantastic at making you believe he wants you.

Steve was also making Eddie forget himself, which was cool, cool, cool. They wound up having a dumbass strawberry fight, spattering them across the balcony, smearing them all over Steve’s torso and both their faces. Then they ate the taste out of each other’s mouths while dry rutting on a sunbed. With Steve gyrating on top of him, Eddie soon had a blockbuster erection again… and Steve?

His mask slipped a little when they broke for air. He actually shuddered, and that’s when Eddie felt the goosebumps as he stroked at Steve’s nape.

“You cold?” asked Eddie.

“No way,” said Steve. “It’s only September.”

Liar, liar, pants on fire, thought Eddie. At least it hadn’t been an involuntary shudder of revulsion.

A cool breeze cleaved between them, and Steve shuddered again.

“Wanna go back inside?” asked Eddie. “There’s a pigeon after the strawberries and I swear it’s hexing me with its manic pink eyes.”

Eddie led the way. Steve had already followed before Eddie realised that he’d gone in a different door from the one they came out through. The door that led to the room that he often avoided. The one where he piled the crap he didn’t want to think about, and the one with—

“You’re shitting me, man,” said Steve. “You’ve got a baby grand?”

“Yeeeah.”

“I didn’t even realise there was another room here.”

“Tell me about it. Seems I still get lost in my own penthouse. This is kinda my dump room.” 

Eddie started gathering up his notes from his game design and the probably-fake Hendrix guitar, which lay on the floor. He was considering reacquainting himself with his joint, when a neat chord sounded from the piano. Steve started to sing:

“It's a little bit funny 

This feeling inside

I'm not one of those who can easily hide

I don't have much money, but boy if I did

I'd buy a big house where we both could live—"

Steve’s voice cracked and he coughed briefly into his hand. “Shit! I broke your no music rule.”

Eddie snapped his gaping mouth shut. “No sweat.”

“Elton John not your poison?”

Eddie was still reeling. “I got every respect for the Rocket Man. ‘Your Song’ isn’t quite my kinda song, but… Shit, dude, it’s fine and you’re amazing. You can really belt it out—I’m envious—and where did you learn to tickle the ivories like that?”

“Learned as a kid.” Steve’s laugh was odd, brittle. “I sucked at reading music. Not much good when your parents want you classically trained.”

“They were uncool about it?”

Steve shook his head, slid across the piano stool to make room for Eddie. “They were always super-supportive. Always. They could never find a tutor who’d stick with their loser son.”

Steve sniffed, staring at the piano keys. Eddie was torn between feeling sorry for Steve and a smoldering curiosity to learn what happened to Steve’s “super-supportive” parents.

Only rich kids learned piano, right? Yet here Steve was…

Steve looked up sharply. “Let’s talk about you. Tonight’s all about you, Eddie-babes. Wanna share your rock-and-roll story? You finally gonna spill?”

“What?”

“You gotta be in a band.” Steve nodded at the guitar. “Let me guess. Had a fall-out with your bandmates? Artistic differences?” Eddie started grinding his teeth, and his knees jittered. “Or some other kind of musician? I mean, you got a piano here, dude… though I suppose it comes with the suite… Um, yeah, you don’t have to answer. I’ll zip it.”

Eddie realized he must be looking as pissed as he felt. Which Steve didn’t deserve. Eddie puffed out his cheeks:

“I was in a band. Corroded Coffin. We never hit the big time and I made my big bucks elsewhere—down to two other kids’ Einstein-like eggheads, and nothing to do with music or even lil’ ol’ me, really. No, I don’t play piano. I can mess around with a few chords, hit Middle C. That’s about it.”

“You’re pretty good at hitting my G… spot.” Steve’s hand slithered underneath Eddie’s bathrobe, zeroing in between his tense thighs. “I owe you a blowjob, man.”

Eddie lost his shit laughing. Steve’s dud-tastic smooth talking had totally melted the tension. Steve was stupid levels of nice as well as sexy af, and that was all that mattered. 

“From one loser to another,” said Eddie, blood shooting south, “I’m not gonna fight ya.”

part 4.2 or search #thefreakinthepenthouse

...

On ao3

Likes reblogs and comments much appreciated and will feed the bunnies🐰💕🐰💕🐰💕🐰💕

On tumblr: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3.1 Part 3.2

On AO3 All my ST stuff on AO3

[lazerv4]

Thoughts on Game Changer (Seasons 1 to 5)

Just my raw thoughts not a review or anything

A.K.A. a small love letter to dropout.

One day you are a simple person scrolling through shorts/reels/tiktoks, just mindlessly looking for something entertaining to watch for like a minute at a time, suddenly you stumble upon a weird game show with ridiculous stipulations and incredibly funny rants in the middle of it, you think to yourself wow I really wanna watch the full show but then you find out it’s exclusive to a streaming network called Dropout and you don’t really want to spend money on it, but you keep stumbling upon the shorts and suddenly you start getting other shows like Um, Actually, Dirty Laundry and Dimension20, your curiosity gets the better of you and you subscribe on either the main page or become a member on their youtube channel and boom, your world has been turned completely upside down by a new hyperfixation that might be some of the best and highest quality streaming every made, a community of people that truly care for each other and feel like they are creating things they really love, this is about one of those, the darling of CEO and host Sam Reich, the always entertaining Game Changer the only game show where the game changes every show, my favorite show on Dropout and just one of my favorite shows of all time. But as we know the only way to learn is by playing, the only way to win is by learning and the only way to begin is by beginning.

Season 1 is short but a swat and beautiful little beginning, it starts with the iconic Lie Detector episode where a lot of the popular clips come from, a brilliant idea by Sam to bamboozle his players with the twist that the robot indicating if they are lying is really their partners in the next room just pressing a button, a very ingenious and funny concept that would be fully perfected in season 6 but for now it starts the show with the right leg with both concept and contestants as this is also the debut of all time favorite Brenan Lee Mulligan, one of the most fun to watch comedians in general be it improv or not. The episode is followed by a 3 time game samer that would eventually turn into its own show making some noise which I will probably explain further if I cover the full show. Being two for two is fantastic but the show still hit us with some other great episodes such as a Game of Prizes which sees the contestants guessing what prizes are real and which are just made up words put together to sound appealing, Whodunnit which is a who would have thought a whodunnit and finally Nom Nom Nom a flavor guessing game with a big disembodied mouth approving or disapproving their choices. The selection of Season 1 was small but a strong start for the show and setting what we would come to know as the game changer formula plus it gave us a lot of the shorts that we still see promoting it to this day even 4 years and 6 seasons later.

Season 2 begins with a game samer that being the previously mentioned second part of the segment that would turn into Make Some Noise which is a little strange of a start but the waters where still being tested and Dropout was still CollegeHumor which was owned and operated by IAC, a company that expected ridiculous profits from the young streamer that even with its high quality programming was nearly impossible. Episode 2 in a way is revenge against IAC as Sam very clearly is just giving away money for making the contestants do ridiculous challenges testing the good old phrase, how much money would you do that for to it’s full extend, this is follow by Sleeper Agents, one of my favorite underrated episodes where the contestants must go outside and talk to random people trying to trigger a response from a set of questions to see if they are hired actors playing the titular sleeper agents or just normal people walking down the street. Another banger and progenitor of some of the other popular clips is A Sponsored Episode were in a fun twist the contestants must become infomercial hosts and sell Sam on some ridiculous and stupid products like the iconic only p keyboard or flavored toilet paper for eating ass it’s just hit after hit and even with all that it’s not the best episode this season. Next we get another underrated episode with The Everything Factory where contestant most essentially become workers with an assembly line and construct different contraptions all to the glee of Sam and his wicked imagination but as fun as it is being sandwiched between the sponsor and the finale is a tough spot as the grand ending to season 2 brings us possibly the most iconic Brendan moment and by extension the greatest rant in the history of game changer with the episode Yes or No which I implore you to watch before I spoil the twist. The episode is simple, Sam will keep asking continuously yes or no and awarding points with seemingly no rhyme or reason with the objective of figuring out the rules of the game and why he awards points, at first it seems completely random until something weird starts to come to our attention, Brenan isn’t scoring points, which in game about 50/50 you would think would be impossible and you would be right as it is slowly figured out by everyone and finally by Brenan himself that the rule is simply that he cannot win anything which trigger the mother of all monologues as he compares himself to Icarus flying too close to the sun as a competitor and a statistical wonder before delivering the punchline at the end and wrapping this season with one of the greatest moments in the show’s history as the ending theme kicks in and Sam says goodbye until season 3 arrives.

Season 3 was heavily affected by the covid19 pandemic as episodes had to be filmed remotely via zoom or an equivalent, a lot of is a little forgettable as the struggle to make the show work was front and center but still a few gems came out of it like the premier Tell Us About Yourself in which they have to figure out the identity of a secret masked individual (who turns out to be Tony Hawk), the game samer Sell Outs which is a repeat of the sponsored episode, the always fun Secret Samta duology in which well they do a secret santa spin on a competitive game to a really hilarious extend, a personal favorite in Make It Fashion which is about well making outfits out of nothing, Tome of Terror follows as a horror story maker and the finale Next Slide Please which weaponizes random ted talk slides to create funny presentations in a very Jackbox way that is still very entertaining regardless. Overall Season 3 struggled but it did the best it could with the hand that it was dealt and Sam should be commended for his handling of the situation and the way he still made the show work and be fun while people needed it most, it hits a little different now that it’s all over but it is by no means a skip and has the same classic laughs even if they are from different points in the map.

Season 4, one of my favorite preview graphics of all time that I really really want as poster Sam please I need this. S4 gives us many many iconic episodes, possibly the highest number of them to date and some really special episodes so this section might be a little long as I want to talk extensively about this season. First off it starts with Sam Says that while pretty tame this time around grows into possibly the single best series of game samers in the entire show with the ways it twists such a simple game as simon says into pure chaos and fun which is then followed up by another progenitor for a game samer with Like My Coffee which birthed some incredibly iconic clips like the green virginal one from Grant and was just incredibly funny the first time around and also when it came back again, now we just need a third one to wrap up the samer. Noise Boys follows which at this point I’ve explained enough and you should know what it is and then another game samer (are you getting tired of reading game samer yet) with the last and possibly greatest Secret Samta which just ups the ante by making it happen in the actual studio this time and works wonders on giving this samer a proper closure. Filmed Before A Live Studio Audience is one of the most interesting and experimental episodes yet with essentially a clap and boo track slowly leading the contestants into a sort of sketch action by action and thrive on their bewilderment at the situation they are in. Then comes one of my favorite episodes with The Official Cast Recording and this one is special, the sheer amount of talent being shown by improvising an entire musical even with it’s wonky story is fantastical, the numbers are all so incredibly good and the ongoing jokes make me laugh every time, it is truly a wonder that it was even possible to create this entire game which also spun off into it’s own series with Play It By Ear. The episode is just a marvel to behold and while not a recommendation to introduce people to Game Changer it is an incredible showcase on what makes this show unique and interesting so enjoy your temporary stay on Mounport. We then reach one of the most beautiful displays of love you can ever see with Don’t Cry, the episode starts of as a seemingly normal challenge about not crying with some games but as it goes on it starts to get really emotional and lovely till it reveals itself to be a tribute to Jess Ross their friend who had a really rough pandemic that canceled her wedding. This episode is so special, it never fails to make me cry and just makes me feel like so incredibly happy. I won’t spoil much more because it really is an experience you should have but I do wanna say that if there is anything I can ever ask for in life it is to be loved by the people around me at least a little like how everyone at dropout loves Jessica Ross.

Resuming the normalcy in this random collection of words I’ve been rambling on for a while now we have Race to the Bottom which also turned into a game samer, can you tell this season is good? it’s basically a reverse bidding war with the twist that the contestants have to unionize to win the game, which is kind of a really cool and interesting message  that was somehow given through a game show. It’s a great episode and will hopefully turn into a great trilogy when the third one drops. Then we have the final two parter, another progenitor of game samer and of technically it’s own mini season during season 5 Survivor which puts the contestants in a game of well Survivor, a simple but really fun idea since Survivor the actual show is an incredibly entertaining reality but with the unhinged cast of dropout anything can go so further beyond, particularly because Brenan is in this episode and it turns out he really loves Survivor so he will do anything to win and the twists and turns this creates are so mesmerizing and shocking you won’t know what to expect until the season ends and you are watching the extra episode on the things this season Cut For Time which is a new addition that has Sam talking you through everything that happened during the episodes and what they couldn’t show, think of it as extra features on a DVD/Bluray. It is quite short but it wraps an incredible season just reminding you of how great of a run it was as you see small parts of all previous episodes and at this point you can just smile as Game Changer has been fully realized and shown that it is one of the greatest pieces of TV to ever exist.

Now it’s a little awkward to go into Season 5 after how I ended the last segment but rest assured the momentum didn’t stop and it will never stop as we kick off the new season with Sam Says 2 a game samer from last season that is as funny as it was previously with new running jokes and some incredibly smart and weird prompts from Sam to keep the contestants on their toes even in a game as simple as simon says. If you are watching this in a playlist you’ll immediately see this season’s new feature in the BTS videos which are short 6 to 10 minute episodes about well the making of the episode with Sam explaining the origin of the game and the why of the selected contestants which in general is just very interesting ad a cool extra feature that we got along the Cut For Time at the end so it’s a general gain plus it’s pretty good. A game samer into a game changer it’s Karaoke Night a kind of spiritual successor to my beloved The Official Cast Recording but with pop music instead of musicals and there is no structure it’s more about impersonating styles of several musician correctly and well this is another incredible display of raw talent and a very fun episode that while it starts a little slow it wraps up magnificently into a crescendo of it’s own making which drops us off into the next episode, another game samer with Like My Coffee 2 a funnier and stupider evolution to a very simple concept that somehow keeps finding ways to entertain and just bring me joy whenever I click on the video on dropout. So far we’ve had two samers and one changer which means that we need a changer and what a game changer we got with an absolute top 5 Name A Number which comes with an all time cast rivaled by few in Becca Scott, Izzy Roland and Erika Ishii bringing in pure chaos to a game that at first seemed simple with just prompts that they had to name how many times they could perform until midway through the game the prompts become unknown until the number has been named, the absolute diabolical connivingless of Sam has been fully realized and deliver some of the absolute funniest of laughs and some incredibly hard to watch cringe. I hope Becca got her money for the feet stuff. A Game Most Changed seems to be a somewhat divisive episode that people either really like or don’t seem to care for at all, it’s an improvised shakespearian play with random prompts throw in about the topic and things that need to be mentioned which just in the raw concept you should know if that appeals to you or not so moving on to the next episode which is another instantly iconic one As A Cucumber which in case you can’t tell it’s an episode about remaining calm but with Katie, Brennan and Carolyn onboard you know shit is about to go down. The way this episode works is by attaching heart rate monitors to the players and by maintaining their resting heart rate below 20 above they can score points and hence win the game. The approach taken by each one of them was varied with Katie’s not so good attempt at just remaining cheerful and normal, Brenan’s competitive enlightenment and Carolyn’s laid bad chill switch we see all kinds of reactions and ways people can be driven to madness, particularly in what might be the peak of all Game Changer clips is the name that bird segment in which Brennan completely loses his temporarily acquired enlightenment in a sort of calm rage as he gets more and more upset as the segment continues before it’s revealed to be roose to upset Brennan and break his streak. This episode is just great, I hope it become as samer with season 7 later this year and so we move to the next episode which happens to be a double parter, the first non finale one which is The Bi Bachelor a show that does well The Bachelor with Grant O’Brien being the contestant and having to choose from a pool of candidates to go on a trip to Cabo San Lucas.

The game has so many twists and turns that covering it would just be a retelling of the entire thing and you don’t need that, you need to sit down and watch this great parody of trashy tv with an ending you are just not ready for. The finale not finale is Escape The Green Room, why finale not finale well because the true end of Season 5 is an extended semi season that will get it’s own spot after this but now Escape the Green Room, Game Changer’s take on the escape room. The episode begins with the contestants on a room that is not the normal show floor awaiting the order to go proceed downstairs and begin the episode, Sam is there with them until he is called downstairs mid magic trick and then the door locks and the screen turns on, the game begins. Secretly the entire room has been customized and modified around the classic escape room concept that if you’ve ever been to one you know how the episode will go with the exception that Siobhan, Brenna and Lou just really don’t give a shit and will tear through everything to get out in another banger of an episode that had my laughing the whole way through, this one also has one of the most interesting BTS videos as it goes into the making and design of what was basically making a escape room from scratch. I would love for this to be made into an actual place I can visit but at least I got to see it happen and it was wonderful. This sort of ends the season as the next few episodes are kind of it’s own thing but the Cut For Time episode is after them in the playlist but it also has its own playlist so I’ll just handle it like a limited series sort of event that will be talked about as a single episode instead of the 5 episodes it is.

Game Changer Battle Royale a 3 hour plus spectacular semi samer to the original survivor episode that takes all that made that episode great and dials it up to 11, as the show is longer, the totems are harder to find, the challenges are harder and there is more on the line than ever before. Everything about this mini series is gold with it being incredibly funny and sometimes even impressive in what it’s capable of doing and a very funny surprise guest that showed up out of nowhere, the one and only fault I can think of that is not even a fault is that Ana Garcia who was making her debut in Game Changer got injured on episode one and we missed out on her antics since she has proven to be an incredibly funny comedian in every other show she has show up on dropout. Battle Royale was just so much fun and reached the apex of the reality idea for Game Changer which I’m not sure if it can be topped but it can for sure be iterated upon and I do hope we come back to see it again every few years.

Now to wrap up this massive massive post I just wanna say that I love dropout, they are a wonderful set of people that truly do care and deserve all the support they get, a lot of entertainers and comedians have been recently trying to leave youtube and copy the dropout system without getting what made dropout great to begin with, it is the charm, the effort and pure love they put into everything they make that makes it so great, not the production values or how much money they spend on it, it’s about the people it gives a home to and what they are able to accomplish when you give a genius free reign to make whatever they think is best, dropout is a special place and Game Changer is a great signature show to lead the brand, I will always love it and be here to support it, it is as Brennan once said to Sam “You’ve made a home where my favorite people get to show the world how brilliant and amazing they are.”

[starl1tsky]

ok so. boston gatsby musical. overall? i enjoyed it, had a great time watching it, etc.... HOWEVER. cons first then pros. and then stuff i had mixed feelings on.

a) they took gatsby's teeth out. he was wayyy too nice. also not charismatic enough. like i feel like a gatsby should suck the air out of a room bc you're too busy staring at him. like those gayass vampires from the vampire show. anyway he was dorky and like sweet and shit and im like that is NOT jay gatsby!!!! that is a musical theater mfa.

b) daisy was also a yass queen white feminist instead of like. the ideal that gatsby obsesses over which like ok, fleshing out female characters, wtver, but daisy SUCKS SO HARD like she killed that girl. did daisy buchanan successfully utilize girl power when she vehicular manslaughtered her husband's mistress. also they were leaning so hard into the class thing that it might've been better to like uh idk TALK ABOUT CLASS??? BC DAISY IS ALL ABOUT CLASS SHE IS LITERALLY THE REPRESENTATION OF THE UPPER CLASS?????

b part 2) they also changed it so that daisy actually totally did want to marry gatsby and her mom forced her to marry tom which imo removes a lot of nuance from the story like??? its not a fucking love story????!!! daisy was NOT about to marry gatsby when he was poor like. let's not try to make daisy something she isn't.

c) ok so they basically made it so gatsby was Native American and like pretending to be white and that in and of itself is NOT a con, i think that's an interesting way to deal with the whole new money/reinvention thing. HOWEVER it felt very shoehorned in bc it was literally only mentioned in the last song when gatsby's dad came to bury him. and then the finale was like #landback which is all well and good but again let's maybe try and have one cohesive theme (class tensions) before we try to add things into the final two songs. because that is not the place to add themes.

d) this isn't so much a con as a ???? but jordan??? what the fuck was she doing there. she like was an exposition drop for nick like twice and then she just stood there and had a verse in like two songs and made out with people. the actress was very hot so it was okay but like. what was she doingggggg.

e) i LOVE florence + the machine however. the music was GOOD, objectively speaking but i would have appreciated a little more variety. the tap number was great tho, 10/10. also loved the damage that you do, that was a good one. "what of love and what of god" felt like, a good florence + the machine song but a heavy handed musical theater song like. giving dust and ashes. great song, but jesus christ josh groban calm the fuck down.

PROS:

a) ok i know i said gatsby wasn't charismatic enough BUT. in the meyer wolfsheim number, he was tap dancing and it was INCREDIBLE. so what i think is that they just should have had him dance more, bc the actor was an INCREDIBLE dancer and that would've given him the gatsby charisma and magnetism. so that's a directing/staging issue not an actor issue. like as far as i remember he only properly danced in that one song.

b) i did appreciate how they fleshed out myrtle and her husband, it was very well done and added significantly to the class tension themes of the original novel

b part 2) HOLY SHIT SOLEA PFEIFFER THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE. also the husband ATE. the two of them were really extraordinary, standout performances.

c) nick was very charming, they did fourth wall break/monologue type things and it worked quite well i thought. he had a great voice, would've loved it if they gave him more to do but...

d) i mentioned this before but GOOD LORD the meyer wolfsheim tap number was fantastic. best part of the whole show imo

e) honestly the tom was very good. like detestable and i wanted to punch him in his face the whole time but. he was quite good. and i said it before but the damage that you do ATE.

f) very sexy. lots of hot people dancing and making out with each other.

ok now things im unsure about.

a) look. nick carraway is a homosexual. you know this; i know this, however, i don't think he's aware enough to be like "yeah i'm fucking gay and in love with gatsby" like he is gay, he is in love with gatsby but like i do not think he knows that. he idolizes gatsby because he doesn't have the vocabulary or the self knowledge to know that he's in love with him. also babe if you know you're gay and you know you'r ein love with gatsby and gatsby is trying to get with you for his first song and a half, WHY ARE YOU HELPING HIM GET WITH THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE WHO HAPPENS TO BE YOUR COUSIN???? make it make sense. but yea i think making nick gay is the right choice and even having him make out with dudes is the right choice and yea maybe he even knows he's gay but i really don't think he knows he's in love with gatsby. and also nick didn't narrate quite enough and when he did he wasn't quite unreliable enough.

basically i just LOVe the great gatsby and while i did enjoy this musical i just didn't like it as much as the book. so i guess my expectations were too high. also i found it ironic and depressing that in a musical where the adapters added so much about modern politics and tried so hard to modernize the politics of the original novel, the ushers STILL managed to be racist to my mother. yay a.r.t!!!!!

[wolfscarr]

Helluva Boss: The Grimoire. Useless, Pointless, Wasted.

https://www.tumblr.com/wolfscarr/722663010998566912/asmodean-crystals-mere-existence-is-the-issue?source=share

^ How the Asmodean Crystals really break the narrative.

https://www.tumblr.com/wolfscarr/749044157770825728/helluva-broken-narrative-and-the-most-useless?source=share

^ The Broken Narrative

Alright so this is probably gonna be my last post on this show, or unless something else happens that REALLY gets under my skin.

Now the Grimoire? This....THIS thing has got to be one of the most wasted, pointless and useless plot devices I’ve ever seen. But  let’s go over what it’s supposed to be as per Season 1 hm?

What it’s suppose to be

The Grimoire as per Season 1 of HB, is suppose to be the key in how and why Blitz is able to run I.M.P., he explicitly states in the commercial from the Pilot that this is the reason why the Company is the way it is. That this Company is all about going to the Living World and killing people up top for money and that the only way they can do this, is because they have ‘special access’ to it.

Now in order to do this, Blitz had to go through this monthly deal in exchange for the book. All of this is perfectly fine, it’s set up as something very important and what Blitz needs in order to get a lifestyle that he wants.

What it became

Almost immediately the Grimoire is reduced to nothing more than...a paperweight. Because right at the start of Season 2, were introduced to something called Asmodean Crystals, which enable travel to the Living World and these Crystals can be in the form of various jewelry or whatever that can be worn.

Oh but then it gets even worse as right in EP 3 of Season 2, Blitz states to Crim at least twice that I.M.P. doesn’t do killings in Hell anymore, they used to...but now they don’t anymore. He also says this to Stolas in EP 1 of Season 2 BEFORE he gets the Grimoire that he’s killing people.

These 2 things bring into question the WHOLE point of Blitz’ deal and the entire show. The WHOLE SHOW falls apart because of this. 

A show functions by having a coherent plot/story. Season 1 gave a reason as to why Blitz needed the Grimoire and why he had to be around Stolas. 

Season 2 meanwhile just threw all that out the window, Blitz doesn’t need the Grimoire anymore, he has no reason to be around or even talk to Stolas....so why?

Here’s a thought, remove Stolas and the Grimoire entirely from HB. Aside from no gay stuff involving Blitz and Stolas, what changes overall with regards to I.M.P.?

I’ll tell you...NOTHING.

The characters are still the same, hell you can still basically have all the episodes with perhaps a couple of adjustments, but you could still have them.

 In fact you could make far more interesting episodes, because as I said in a prior post, you could easily make both character building and world building with just revolving around the Asmodean Crystals.

Or I.M.P in Hell? Maybe they take out contracts from Hellborn, maybe lower Nobility, hunting targets throughout the Rings. Because I’ll tell you what, those Earth centric episodes haven’t really been that great to start with. If I.M.P was taking out contracts BEFORE Sinners with Hellborn clients, then nothing changes other than location. Oh and look at this, you expand upon your world building in Hell this way too. Which wasn’t that suppose to be one of the points of Helluva Boss, seeing as Hazbin was taking place in one area?

You could even still have male/male stuff too, if you really wanted as well. This isn’t rocket science, if you can remove the Gromire and Stolas completely and nothing really changes because there’s other alternatives that can basically make the story go the same way or in another interesting direction? Then there’s an issue.

The Grimoire in of itself has also not been used to its full potential I feel as well. Here you have this fantastical book that clearly has some powerful magic, yet the only thing it’s used for is....portal opening. There’s so many different ways that the Grimoire can be used for various episode shenangeins and yet on its own, is just wasted.

Despite my last couple of posts, I do like this show. ....For what little I like, I like this show. It’s just stuff like this bothers me and I don’t wanna have to just “deal with it or go with it” because it’s a show made by a small studio and on Youtube. Audiences shouldn’t have to be like that, the studio sets the deadline, the studio does the writing, they have all the time in the world. I mean just look how long we had to wait for episodes folks, stuff like this shouldn’t be happening, at least not something so huge.

Anyway now that I got that out of my system, I can relax and enjoy the show...well as much as I can.

[romanarose]

Fic Recs

I'll admit I've been slacking. A lot. It was a high anxiety summer as you know, and I've finally been able to pretty much cut ties with an abusive friend who was causing a LOT of those anxiety and panic attacks. BUT I want to rec some of my fav writers and fav stories.

To keep the presure low on myself I am only linking ONE story per writer, whatever story that speaks to me. I do hope if you like the story you'll check out more from them!

Please remember to reblog their stories if you read them, and if you feel inclinded, leave a kind comment! Big comments are fantastic but even a short "Great story!" Means the world!

Dead Dove Do Not Eat and all dark fics will be in red. Might make a whole other dddne tag list on my dark blog on of these days lmfao

Moon Knight

Fractured Moon by @melodygatesauthor : DDDNE Yandere Moon boys x reader, non con, extreme violence but such good interpretations of the boys

Friendly Favors by @runa-falls best friend steven, friends with benefits??? friends to lovers??? yes plzzz

Rydal Keener

Oxford Comma by @whatthefishh : Collage AU, Rydall is cunty, serves cunt, and eats cunt. What can I say.

TLOU (Most of what I'm reading rn if im being honest)

Linger On by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin : Pre-outbreak!Joel, angst, yummy smut, ft. my boyfriend, Tommy (Angela said I can be Tommy's gf)

Caught by @toxicanonymity : Inspired Keep Cry'n, Joel catches you when you try to run, masterbates onto your face. part 2 has TOMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Maintainence Man series by @gracieispunk : Joel is a, well, Maintenace man in our building! He is married but that doesn't stop him from fucking you

Hungry Hearts @atinylittlepain : If ya'll know me, you know I love Bruce Springsteen. I have 2 fics named after springsteen songs, one joel one javi/santi/reader. I've fallen behind on the series but loved it enough to make fan art! terrible fan art but still! Pre-outbreak, takes place in two timelines- college age and then the 2000'. Joel has Sarah, reader is ellies mom which I think is fun.

Exit Wounds by @strang3lov3 : No fic masterlist so I tagged the main masterlist. Now listen. I love Tommy Y'all know I love tommy... but cheating on tommy? Im so sorry baby. But ur also an asshole lol. Had it coming.

Creep by @theywhowriteandknowthings : I- ugh just read it. darkish but nothing insane like the wrong way lmfao. pretty mild comparatively but use discression but THAT TWISTTTTTTTT

Only Daddy That'll Walk the Line by @millerscoffee Yellow istead of red bc its not like. dark but Joel's pretty mean

Not A Survialist Girl by @tightjeansjavi again yellow bc joel's a dick lol but THE DIRTY TALK?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Miguel O'Hara

Halo by @missdictatorme : Miguel O'Hara goes full Nathan Bateman and fucks his ai. Whore.

Only You Only Me by @astroboots : so im behind on this one too. What about it! Im terrible I know but like Hungry Hearts above I may be a slow reader but I didn't forget and also did stupid fan art of this great fic too. lol. Anyway plz read this, I cant give a great summary bc im only a few chapters in but if youre in the oscar fandon you know cici writes only bangers

No One But Me by @koshkamartell : You try to break things off with Joel and begin spending time with the hot librrian in Jackson. Joel does not like thi

Triple Frontier

Under Neon Lights by @campingwiththecharmings : sexy drunk sex with my baby boi, santi <3

Through the Scope by @ssuperficialspacecadett : Reader works for Benny and falls for frankie. Great relationships with all the boys, reader has sexual trauma so you knoooooooow i eat these fics up!!!! lovely to see all them be appriciated with special focus on FRANKIE my precious lol guy

Shared Breathes by @frenchiereading : DAD FRANKIE x teacher reader. Triple frontier may have forgotten Frankie has a baby (he deserved the money for her) BUT WE DID NOT!!!!!

The Story of Us by @pimosworld : You served in the military with the boys but they made a deal not to sleep with you. Years later after helping you escape abuse, one by one they begin to waver aka you fuck them all. FishBen as a bonus!!

Goddamn have I really only been reading TLOU XD lmfao makes sense bc thats mostly what Im writing. That and the Javier pena x reader x santi and then the will fic but im soooooooooo much of a TLOU whore rn its insane.

Im sure ill remeber some more amazing TF fics soon but for now here we are!

Gonna plug real quick my latest one shot tho bc it's a holiday and I can self promo if I want! Shana Tova, moon boys x non jewish!reader where the moon boys share a part of their jewish identity with you!

THANK YOU TO ALL WRITERS FOR YOUR HARD WORK, I APPRICIATE YOU!

If you ever seen my like and not reblog know its just bc I forgot and im sorry. If you ever tagged me in a tag game and i never responded its bc I forgot and again IM SORRY

If I didnt tag anyone and you think i didt think your fic was worthy THATS NOT IT im simply overwhelmed with how much ive read and how this summer was and i just havnt organized it all. Im sorry!!

[britcision]

Not gonna lie, we’ve been watching YuYu Hakusho alongside the release of Delicious In Dungeon and uh

It’s been illuminating

Like on the one hand hoooooooboy you can taste the 90s animation techniques (and the Netflix version is somehow more strobey and seizure bait, and they’ve fucked random chunks of audio?? I have the dvds I can prove they’ve fucked around)

On the other hand… yeah, it really, really highlights what people have already been talking about with the Delicious In Dungeon - the pacing issues, especially with going shot for shot from the manga instead of embracing their own medium

Cuz I will stand by YuYu Hakusho being the best anime version of a manga I’ve ever seen. It’s true to the manga, but keeps up the pacing and fleshes things out by leaning more into the side characters, and particularly our audience surrogates, Koenma and George

The fights all pace well because we cut to the people watching them, so it’s not just repetitive punch punch punch shots (although we do get those)

Whereas this week’s episode of DunMeshi in particular…. Really suffered from skewed pacing on that fight

They had way too much time just standing around talking, both with the harpies and in between Falin’s attacks, and I’d bet even an anime-only fan could pick out which shots were literal panels in the anime because nothing moved to flow between them

Those shots of the separated groups especially; this is anime, not manga. Those people could have been moving, interacting, doing things instead of panning over a still

I get that it takes more time and money but this was a really significant fight and it does make me worry a little for season 2, because the red dragon fight also had some pacing problems (although to a much lesser degree) and season 2 is when the combat pops off

I really do appreciate them wanting to do a faithful interpretation of the manga and sticking close to Ryoko Kui’s vision, but anime is its own medium and by sticking too closely they’re not taking full advantage of that medium

You have more time to fill in an animated episode vs a manga chapter because your characters literally move and flow, and three panels of action happen in a second

They’ve been folding two or three chapters into each episode, but this week’s especially (ep 17) really played too close to that two chapter timeline, instead of taking out the important story beats and the time to fill and working out how to pace around that instead

(Funnily enough though, they actually nailed the exact same kinda pacing issue in the exact same episode for the Laios and Shuro fight; that one was fucking great, it was clear that action was ongoing even while we focused on other people, and it had good weight and emphasis despite being largely offscreen, just like the harpy fight should have been

I. Guess. They coulda put more work into that than the Falin fight? Cuz it’s a huge character moment but for fuck’s sake Chimera!Falin SHOULD be the bigger one! We the audience got hints but this was the REVEAL)

Honestly just… the 1000% disinterest in the harpy fight was jarring, and it leading immediately into the Falin fight that was basically stop motion without the time lapse didn’t help

Cutting to Marcille and Shuro on the shirt tear was fucking great though, chef’s kiss, someone out there is still watching over us, I just hope they work out a happy medium soon

I get that there’s lots of iconic and fantastic panels in the manga, I made a complete summary of every single chapter, but the anime shouldn’t be showing them as stills

The characters should be moving in between them, not snapping from one face to the next like a slide show

In a perfect world I’d also love some more little character asides and things a la YYH, but there just isn’t the same easy audience characters to cut to

But but but

Thistle reacting a la Koenma to some snippets of the bullshit in his dungeon would give me fucking LIFE he can’t be watching all the time for obvious plot reasons but I want him to find a veggie golem

I want him to see the kraken and find some leftovers and be searching for Delgal and plotting their dinner and wondering why he can smell something delicious and what is it and can he make that

Move the background stuff that got cut from the Tances’ episodes, cut to Namari and the twins hanging out and talking about leg guards, there’s SO MUCH supplemental material

It might be less one for one to the manga but it’d stop the weird dragging out and give us something more, something extra to appreciate the anime on its own merits

It’s nice to have an anime experience that is very close to reading the manga, but it’s something really special to have the anime shine and add to the experience on its own

Anyway next week is the shapeshifter and I’m so hype for that and wondering if they are gonna include just a smidge of meta knowledge since Kui did tell us whose impersonations are whose 👀

[lizardboy66]

im deeply bored so here are all of my gay 911 thoughts for your entertainment.

OKAY SO

Idk about 911 being queerbait guys...i dont think it ever was. I think we have entered a new era of fanservice. Usually with queerbait, the creators and people involved in the show are quite vicious to shippers and queer fans generally, and any easter egg or "moment" feels like crumbs to keep us hooked enough.

911 acknowledged the shipping very very early. Like second half of season 2, and there has never ONCE been a joke at the expense of the concept of being gay, or about buck or eddie being queer. It was simply a nod, like "hey, we get it, you want it, thats all good."

Its not 2010 anymore, gay people are accepted and visible in a way that has never been a reality in the past. In fact, gay people, especially gay men, have come to be understood as a fantastic marketing tool.

This is where i get jaded and cynical, but listen the outcome is the same so stick with me here. Gay pairings and relationships = money is not a groundbreaking concept. It's why they did queerbait. But with stuff like supernatural, it seemed like a far greater risk to make the repressed men kiss than to piss of the queer fanbase. But times have changed. But since the age of queerbait, there has been a rise in gay romance content being made, and being made FOR the fangirls, boys and theys. Think Red, White and Royal Blue, or Heartstopper, or Young Royals, or Our Flag Means Death, or Good Omens. Gay isn't a risk anymore, its a marketing category with a level of guaranteed success. And not just in the global north, Boys Love content has been booming in places like Japan, Thailand, Korea for decades, but never more than now. TV companies in these places figured out very quickly that producing fluffy, comforting gay love stories earns them billions, and have not hesitated to seize this opportunity. My point being, gay dudes sell as fuck.

911 got cancelled and had to move networks. The budget is too high and they need to pull viewership and quick. I think their answer is canonise that ship! I couldn't tell you if that was there original intent, but i do believe that it would be far less lucrative to fuck over their viewer base. I could be wrong, this could be a crazy long game to make the fans trust the show, then pull the rug from under them. But i truly think we are past that point with shows like this.

911 is pure fluff! No one ever dies, if someone is hurt they recover quickly and with no complications, conflict is tame and easily resolvable, and everyone is a sickeningly good person. And the show is also about family, found family, unconventional families. I think originally, the unconventionality of the eddie, buck and chris family dynamic was that it is two men who are not together or married raising a child as coparents and friends. Which is a great story, but even better fanfiction fodder.

I think they are going to do it like the fanfiction. It's the easiest way to bridge the epistemic gap between the current cannon and the reality of both buck and eddie being queer and having feelings for each other. they could try and explain it in their own way, but the fans have already done it, and have clearly agreed on some elements of how this love story plays out, so i think that will be the route they go down. Currently my evidence is that Buck is now canonically bisexual. For some reason a lot of the ships people have have one bisexual and one gay, so the trope is being realised. My next piece of evidence is the catholic thing for eddie. This has literally never come up, its a fan invention, and its in the show now. The eddie and marisol plot line is slightly bizzare, but i think the reason for that is that it is eddie making sense of why he struggles so much to commit to the women he dates. Or its just a bad storyline and isnt very coherent. I guess we will see. My next evidence is the whole set up of Tommy. He is so clearly a way to push eddie and buck together in my opinion. From his introduction, he acts as a wedge between the two that neither of them can make sense of. Very love triangle energy. And my last evidence is all of those goddamn interviews. It seems no one can shut up about these fire fighters getting it on with each other. I feel if they weren't doing it, there would be more effort to shut down the clowning gently, as they have done previously.

In conclusion, i too am a clown. My theory has rocky foundations, a rocky middle and an equally rocky conclusion. I am so tired and delulu right now. I'm with you girlies, this is stressful.