#which THEN impacts this OTHER thing that is really crucial

[bookwyrminspiration]

i cannot emphasize enough how much my entire academic situation is currently hinging on receiving an email from one (1) person

[unproduciblesmackdown]

shifted gears like alright after the [lucifer the mysteries please] centered approach that found mostly Other Stuff, centering [blade gunnblade please], and already have found something new but in the "possibly inaccurate & probably irrelevant even if otherwise" vein as a review read through the wayback machine says: "perhaps none moreso than the gun toting android Blade Gunblade, perfectly embodied by Asia Kate Dillon. They even get an awesome heart-wrenching backstory." which is so far the singular mention that blade gunnblade is an android, however, reviewers can Just Say Things, so. i believe the blade gunnblade full backstory clip that's available is from pre 2015's run at the pit, & rather a previous run as serials at the flea (and the prop & setpiece differences if it was simply an alex seife understudy performance from 2015 would be: inexplicable) but i have to imagine that blade's peak tragic backstory ft. murdered wife & child would be very similar, & i guess it would be funny if they were just out & about living their ordinary life with a family like that while also an android, but. however i'll also give them that: mentioned a bit more often is that at least at some point kapow-i Becomes part android / referred to as a cyborg, thanks to the same character as in 2015 & prior's tragic backstory. i don't think this fun fact is like super constantly relevant or obvious, so i Could imagine something along the lines of blade getting the same treatment & it also not being particularly more relevant. or else the proximity of such concepts like "kapow-i's a cyborg, the serials run clip seems to refer to like 'we need this specific rando who is now blade to be injected with Ultimate Fighter elixir (& have their family killed. because) & people's whose bodies couldn't handle it are now kind of like funny little robots (cybernetically automated but with some personality)" & like blade we need you to be a fighting machine was thus sort of conflated lol. but maybe they're a cyborg like i think it happens a lot anyways

[nymphia-tarot]

Your first date with them 🌸 [PAC]

pile 1 ----> pile 2

pile 3 ----> pile 4

Paid readings ($2.99)

🌸 meditate on the pics and pick whichever one calls to you the most. you might feel drawn to more than one pile, which means you may have messages in other piles for you as well! if you don't feel particularly drawn to any pile, the messages in this reading might not be intended for you. since this is a general reading, take what resonates! 🌸

🌸 Pile 1:

I'm getting that this date is something that was a long-awaited thing. Like you or your person might have been planning or dreaming of this for quite a while. You might have met this person at a very crucial time of your life, almost as if the stars aligned perfectly at that moment, and they've been fairly impactful to you. Maybe you met them at school/uni or somewhere relevant to your educational field. This is a person that has been overall pretty important to you in your life, for maybe some sort of karmic lesson, and your connection has been fated to occur.

Pile 1, this is someone you're carefully considering as a serious option. And I feel like the date is a way for you to determine the course of your future with them. A lot of individuals who picked this pile are independent thinkers with a discerning judgement on people. Lots of sapiosexuals too. You want someone to match you at your level and it seems like the date between you two will be a very stimulating experience. The two of you will have a lot of deep conversations and get to know each other better at an intellectual and philosophical level.

There's a good chance of this relationship ending up in marriage for a lot of you. A proposal or offer from your partner. However, I feel like the future of the relationship isn't really that good? Like you're both very fine people but after a while the initial passion and spark would just die down, making the relationship feel very stagnant. Some of you might even stay and do your best to make it work even though it really isn't working. I'm also getting the possibility of cheating for some? If the worst happens, I feel like the best thing to do is to let go and give yourself freedom.

🌸 Pile 2:

Maybe a lot of yall in pile 2 have a tendency to get lowkey delusional when it comes to matters of love. Like getting infatuated and idealising the other party, mostly living in fantasy and maybe you guys read way too much love tarot. I'm seeing a lot of you guys won't really go in with a clear head for this date overall. Hampered intuition, reading too much into lines, limerence, etc. When you actually do get to date your person I'm seeing that it'll finally ground you and make you see them for who they really are and evaluate your own feelings and the future of this relationship from a more realistic lens.

Maybe a lot of you guys' partner here is rich or at least financially stable or abundant. They may even have generational wealth. You guys are going to get spoilt on your date though. Lavished materially, lowkey sugar daddy/mommy vibes, etc. You guys might go to a really fancy place and enjoy a luxurious date with them. However, there's a chance there's a sort of power imbalance in the end, like maybe they're someone who is on a more powerful position systematically or in any other way, they have power over you. I'm getting it's mostly financially though for most of you guys.

Overall, you might end up feeling disillusioned from your previous notions and expectations in this date and they might feel restricted or caged in some way by how you view them. It's like they'll realise that the idea you have of them in your mind does not represent who they are. You might even end up having conflicting views/mentalities.

🌸 Pile 3:

I feel like this is a connection thats mostly fueled by physical attraction/lust which is passionate, fiery and can be all-consuming. You might have been in a bit of a slump before the date occurs and I'm getting that one or both you felt unfulfilled by the current situation of your relationship/where you stand with each other. Maybe the relationship you guys have is something that's a bit unconventional so it can get tough.

It seems like the date will end up in heartbreak for one or both you in some way. I'm getting a serious breach of trust and breaking a promise or vow you had made to each other. It can either end in a break up or continuing to nurture a tattered/unfulfilling relationship. For most of you the one who betrayed the other is your partner in this relationship. Maybe you've wanted to be official with them for a while only to have the devastating realisation that it's not feasible to happen.

After this date, your feelings for your person might dull down or even fade completely. You might get your joys shattered and end up deciding that happiness for you doesn't lie here. As for your person, I'm ngl they seem very physically-driven. They might be trapping you in some way in this relationship in a way that isn't healthy. Like, even if you're unhappy, your person doesn't see it and continues to thrive and take and take while keeping you constrained, not letting you break free of unhealthy cycles. Their feelings for you are mostly lust.

🌸 Pile 4:

The dynamic/relationship between you two might be kinda slow-moving and the lowkey. Maybe you both took a long time to ask each other out finally and was in a sort of stalemate before deciding to go "screw it, you only live once" and shooting your shots. Since it feels like something that happens more haphazardly and on impulse, the date might be slightly awkward for you guys. One or both of you may stumble over your words a lot or kinda not know what to do. This feels kinda frustrating yet adorable from an outside perspective and there might be a lot of internal cursing involved lol.

However, once you actually get through it, you'll realise it really wasn't that bad and overall end up quite fulfilled and happy. At the end, the date might actually go pretty well despite the initial awkwardness once you get the hang of it. If you guys do continue with your relationship, it might actually lead to a lot of growth and development for both of you. I'm also sensing that there's a lot of travel involved? Maybe you guys are from different cultures or cities, etc.

You might be the more composed and rational one during this date and be lowkey analysing everything. Virgo vibes. You might end up intimidating your person a bit lol. Your person on the other hand is full of anxiety and nervousness and it might be more visible on their end lol.

[soft-pine]

spn20rewatch: 1.18 something wicked

say your desk is covered with a pile of paperclips. something wicked is the magnet you drop in the middle and then they all stick to it; they're all connected.

it's all here. the parentification, the neglect, the way john treats dean which sam doesn't witness, the extreme likelihood that john was using his kids as bait, and the intentional, specific, glorious, lovely ways dean has specifically chosen not to be like his dad.

in the flashbacks, we see dean is in charge of feeding and looking after sam for (at least) three days in some random motel room with the shades drawn. he's not even supposed to go outside. he doesn't have a number for john, just the instruction that if john's not back by a certain time, he's supposed to call pastor jim.

we see john giving dean instructions and responsibility (and criticisms) which he's not giving to sam.

dean is at most 11 years old (ep takes place in 2006. dean says the case from when he was a kid was 16-17 years ago (1989/1990). john's journal places it in 1988; dean was 9)

crucially, even as an adult, dean barely talks to sam about what he remembers of the case when he was a kid. he lets go of little bits at a time and absolutely necessary to the case. but he does not want to process what happened. even when he's so torn up that he breaks down and explains what happened, he doesn't want to talk about it. in part, of course, because he's ashamed of failing to kill the shtriga. but also because dean keeps john's secrets (9.07). and even when he doesn't, sam is not who he tends to process with.

but it's deeply impactful to have an episode where we get to see how dean was treated as a child versus how he treats the kids he meets.

dean is so kind to children throughout season 1, from lucas in 1.03 to lily and charlie in 1.05 to michael here. there is something so great about the way he is both clear that the bad things aren't these kid's fault, while also understanding kids have agency and insight.

i know dean is torn up about using michael as bait for the shtriga but feels he doesn't have much of a choice in order to stop the thing. but the conversation he has with michael is so thorough it really gets me.

DEAN: This camera has night vision on it so we'll be able to see clear as day.... Are we good? SAM: A hair to the right... There, there. MICHAEL: What do I do? DEAN: Just stay under the covers. MICHAEL: And if it shows up? DEAN: We'll be right in the next room. We're gonna come in with guns. So, as soon as we do you roll off this bed and you crawl under it. MICHAEL: What if you shoot me? DEAN: We won't shoot you. We're good shots. We're not going to fire until you're clear ok? Have you heard a gunshot before? MICHAEL: Like in the movies? DEAN: It's gonna be a lot louder than in the movies. So I want you to stay under the bed, cover your ears, do not come out until we say so. You understand? DEAN: Michael, you sure you wanna do this? DEAN: You don't have to, it's ok, I won't be mad. MICHAEL: No I'm ok. Just don't shoot me. DEAN: We're not going to let anything happen to you. I promise.

what a specific contrast that is with

DEAN hesitates, terrified. As he does JOHN bursts through the front door, gun raised. JOHN: (Shouting) Get out of the way! DEAN ducks and JOHN shoots the shtriga multiple times with his hand gun.

something wicked is up there with monster at the end of the book for episode titles that'll make you crazy if you think about it too much.

some other thoughts are just, the first time i watched this scene i thought i was going to explode with love:

DEAN: Yeah well, first of all, I'm not going to open fire in a freakin' pediatrics ward.... Second, wouldn't have done any good, because the bastard's bullet proof unless he's chowing down on something. And third, I wasn't packing, which is probably a really good thing cause I probably would have just burned a clip in him on principle alone.

moral compass boy i would die for you a thousand times and get up and gladly do it again.

and nothing - i mean nothing - hits like dean's voice cracking over the "if it means anything sometimes i do too." like i could actually go insane.

also watching supernatural is how you fill up a computer disc with pictures of dean looking ever so beautiful. like. look at him!! ethereal!!

also also ilu microaggression michael. they should have brought you back in the finale, king.

[withthewindinherfootsteps]

I sometimes see the opinion that MXTX took the clichéd tropes she'd critiqued in Scum Villain, and played them straight in MDZS. But though a lot of them appear in MDZS, I'd argue that none are actually played straight at all!

The main point of MDZS's tropes is subversion. Yes, WWX has a 'tragic backstory', even an arguably overused one (orphaned by his parents at a young age, forced to live on the streets with nobody to rely on, etc) – but how things differ in how it's used. Tragic backstories are normally used to build sympathy for a character, to make us care and get invested in them. But... we're never actually shown any of those street days, we're never shown and never dwell upon how much he suffered during them. They're only really mentioned in passing and whenever dogs come up! If the goal was to make us feel bad for WWX, this would be very ineffective writing. But what's actually important here isn't that WWX went through tragedies – it's how he doesn't let the tragedies he went through define him. He doesn't dwell on them, the narrative doesn't dwell on them, it's never used to earn sympathy points... because what defines WWX is his choices and how he chooses to act, not a backstory completely out of his control. What gets us invested in him is his personality and the character writing of MXTX, not tragic events used as a substitute for identity.

And this trope treatment fits extremely well with WWX's personality itself – he's someone who 'forgets the pain as soon as the wound has healed'*, but also who actively chooses to focus on the present because you can't change the past; someone who holds the belief that 'gains and losses [should] remain uncommented on' when choosing what to do.

The use of the tragic backstory isn't the only thing that's subverted, either – the other main thing is the 'blackening' of the protagonist, and its impact on the protagonist's fall. After being thrown into the Burial Mounds, on a surface level it does seem like this blackening has occurred: the first thing we see when he returns is his gruesome torture of the Wen cultivators; he's 'forsaken' traditional cultivation in favour of an 'evil but more powerful' path; and frankly, Sunshot-era WWX is terrifying. But MDZS is not a blackening story, and so the events of the Burial Mounds aren't used as a catalyst for that purpose. Though it's true that WWX's not entirely the same person he was before (because how could be be?), underneath it all, his morals, worldview and core** stay the same. Though gruesome, his revenge is directed towards the ones who wronged him, not those past that and certainly not the entire world. His experience in the Burial Mounds doesn't lead to him being some evil, blackened overlord... like everyone says he is at the start! That's subverted, because again, WWX's values and choices are more important to the story than genre conventions.

But the most crucial thing? What leads to WWX's downfall isn't any blackening! It isn't any vengeance or morally dubious actions***– he was praised for those things during the Sunshot Campaign! No, what leads to his downfall is something completely unrelated to that, something which would've disappeared had the trope been played straight. It's him doing what's right by defending the Wens, it's him following his moral code when it opposes the world's, it's him standing up to the injustice of others – not others standing up to the injustice of him. That's the subversion here.

(Also, once again, the fall of Lotus Pier, the Burial Mound, etc, aren't used for sympathy points – and if it was relevant, they wouldn't have been used to excuse any actions, either. Using tragic events as an excuse for doing bad things is critiqued many times in MDZS, through characters like Xue Yang and Jin Guangyao. And that's not exactly a trope subversion, but it is a critique of badly handled 'excuses'.)

These are by no means all the tropes MDZS subverts – the nature of guidao vs the usual nature of modao being another very major one – but they're the main ones that feature in Scum Villain.

So, though at first glance MDZS seems to play the tropes MXTX critiqued there straighter, it's not a simple case of using them as cliches, and we see that by how they're used to impact the narrative, and how that differs from what they're traditionally used for. MDZS doesn't fall back into clichés Scum Villain satirised – it's the subversion to Scum Villain's exploration and critique.

--

*Which I know is generally used negatively, to describe someone not learning a lesson from a punishment, but it really describes WWX in general, too. He doesn't dwell on that pain, he does his best to move on from it.

**...heh

***And, because it's often debated – whatever the morality/culpability of Nightless City is doesn't even matter! The events happened at a pledge conference against him that was already taking place. WWX's actions there didn't make people want to kill him because that was explicitly happening beforehand.

[hot-astrology]

The Aqaurius Mind: Pluto in Aquarius, Age of Aqaurius, and 2024

The recent events surrounding Katt Williams have stirred my interest, though this event barely scratches the surface of the cosmic workings. The year 2024 portends a great unraveling, as deciphered through its numerology (8) : the influence of Pluto looms over this year, with its placement in Aquarius.

This year's fixed energies signal transformation (Aquarius and Scorpio) and raw power (Taurus and Leo), with Uranus and Jupiter in Taurus and Pluto in Aquarius. The impact of the fixed signs will be significant and profound.

Saturn's presence in Pisces heralds a great awakening. ;I am reminded of my own natal Saturn in the 12th house, which imbues this area of spirituality with discipline and authenticity.Saturn brings discipline and realness to this area of spirituality. And this is what we will see happening for those who are already tapped in. For those who are not this is another great chance similar to 2020 to awaken.

Turning to Vedic astrology, Saturn is positioned in Aquarius this year. In 2020, this was such a huge alignment the only difference is there won't be a great conjunction. But I could see similar potency already. With certain things being spoken about, and if you haven't heard. It's because the government (Saturn) is trying to hide (pisces) a lot of this information away from society. We are fully in the age of aquarius, and things will only continue to get exposed. And no matter how much certain authorities try to hide or stop it. It won't stop until the FULL truth is revealed. No matter how many people are killed, and etc. More and more will keep popping up until the mission is done.

Now switching to tarot, because this is how I connect a lot of my dots. The 21st card (The world card); This card consists of a lion (leo), an eagle (scorpio), a human (Aqaurius), and a bull (Taurus) We see all of these energies being pulled towards us. The world card is the very last card in the tarot deck and represents completion. Now, I would like to turn this over to venuz because he knows more about the cycles and years and stuff. But, I do, I want to also talk about the 10th card in tarot. This is the wheel of fortune. This card signifies karma, destiny, and fate. The cycle of life. This card also resembles the world card but not in a way where things are ending. It shows how life goes on & on. This card also has The Lion, The Bull, The Human, and The Eagle. The four corners of the world/ The angels of the four directions. We see how that number 4 is so significant. These are cycles, and fixed is the last stage. Beyonce was right, America really does have a problem...... The Seal has been broken. ☺ Now, to you venuz.

Cycles......Yes, cycles! Everything evolves in cycles and changes, it's only so long you can stay in the same scenario or comfort zone without chaos knocking at your door. Aquarius is all about change and revolutionizing its surroundings and its people. This energy is at its boiling point. Every 20 years there's a recurrent cycle of same-aged groups with specific behaviors that change. So, if you add 3 more cycles to that it will be a 4 cycle switch, which every generation would affect the other. When the 80-year mark comes around it is a crucial period. Everything is done in cycles, it doesn't matter what it is. Saturn in Pisces will materialize everything you think of, or focus on. This will also bring about what you have been hiding, and not speaking. Thoughts of your subconscious will be brought to the surface, and some will have to face those fears. For Example, Katt Williams has known all of these lies, secrets, backstabbing, cheating, phony, and false allegations, so it's being materialized. All his thoughts, dreams, and deep-rooted issues about other comedians came out to the forefront without any care. As he spoke and exposed their behaviors in front of millions (mass 11th house) and demanded a change (pluto). This calls on the energy of Pluto in Aquarius.

Pluto in Aquarius loves erratic behavior and unexpected scenarios. Pluto comes with a punch and is at full throttle here. Many people are outspoken now and about change and freedom. Aquarius is all revolutionary and Pluto is a generational planet so change is bound to come. This is just the beginning of this world being destroyed and reconstructed into a new and profound system that isn't in line with these new powerful souls. This makes an 80-year period. 10 more years from now will make 90 years which is energy 9 which will be the completion of a major cycle. 8 is just the transformation period and reconstructing period, everything and everyone who wasn't living in their own essence and misusing their fortune, fame and financial abundance in a non conducive manner will reverse roles and be exposed for their inequality.

Like gorgeous Moon Devi said they're trying to hide what they're up to but Saturn in Pisces is revealing everything they have been hiding. So everyone wakes up to all those lies, takes off the rose-colored glasses, no more fantasy land, and is in a delusional state of mind. Pluto in Aquarius will allow everyone to have a voice and speak up, change what's not right, and stand for something even if you never did your whole life. If you were born in this era or if you were born to still be alive in this era get ready for the showdown. If watched in Living Color, this movie promises to be a captivating experience, delivering the answers to long-standing questions and revealing hidden truths. It has the potential to evoke personal fears, making them tangible and forcing introspection. It's a crucial time for everyone, not just celebrities or elites, to focus on self-healing, purification of the soul, and actualizing personal aspirations. Astrologically, the influence of Aquarius, which rules the 11th house of hopes and aspirations, and Pluto provides the necessary impetus to transform negative situations into positive ones, for oneself and the greater good.

However you envision your world to be, you will get the results in this transit. Imagine yourself as a kid at the art table, and you have a box of crayons, an blank piece of paper. The teacher tells you to draw your new world. How would you create it? Would it consist of peace, prosperity, and love? Then she says," Stand up in front of the class, and explain what your world looks like." You say it out loud in front of the class with conviction and power. Then you close your eyes and watch it manifest right before you, VOILA!!! 

From two aqaurius/uranus dominant spirits, ~ Prinz Venuz & Moon Devi

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐎𝐮𝐫 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭

𝑶𝒖𝒓 𝑷𝒂𝒈𝒆𝒔: 𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐳 𝐕𝐞𝐧𝐮𝐳 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐯𝐢

[anistarrose]

Really Small Problems starts with King's bread puns, so obviously, it's already crucial to the emotional arc of the finale. But knowing that the Titan was watching that day, do you know what else the Titan must have noticed, and how that makes the finale so much more impactful?

[ID from alt: King talking to a disguised Tibbles, then Luz kissing King on the forehead after they reconcile. End ID.]

In the episode, King gets used as a pawn by Tibbles — who preys off of King's desire to spend time playing with Luz — and as a result, King puts Luz and her friends in a lot of danger. But Luz, while initially angry, realizes that King was being manipulated, not malicious — and at his absolute worst, just an irresponsible kid who really wanted to spend time with his friend — and she reconciles with him, leading to their bond becoming stronger than ever before.

But hey, for no particular reason, remember what the Titan's greatest regret was, again?

[ID from alt: a projection by the Collector, of the Archivists reaching out to the Collector, then a projection of the Titan glaring menacingly. End ID.]

When the Collector was being used as a pawn by the Archivists, who were the ones who really killed all the Titans, King's dad didn't realize the truth until far too late. Rather than talk to the Collector and try to understand, let alone reconcile, Papa Titan lashed out at the Collector for their perceived betrayal — imprisoning the Collector, thereby plunging him into traumatizing isolation, for millions and millions of years. It's the Titan's worst mistake. The Collector didn't deserve anything like that — the Collector was just a misguided little kid. But the Titan had let his rage consume him. And now, slain by the Archivists, the Titan can no longer undo her mistake.

So... fast forward to when the Titan's own kid has finally hatched, and started to grow up. The Titan sees his kid make a friend in Luz, whom the Titan already likes, because she was kind to King and respectful to the Isles. But then — the Titan sees her own kid do something misguided. The Titan sees his own kid put his friends in danger. Only... instead of fallout from Luz's feelings of betrayal, the Titan sees Luz actually reconcile with King. The Titan sees Luz recognize that King didn't want to hurt anyone. In other words, the Titan sees Luz avoid repeating the Titan's mistake.

Of course, dealing with Tibbles is far, far lower-stakes than dealing with genocidal Archivists. But what the Titan sees is Luz proving that she can be levelheaded, and forgiving, and most of all, trustworthy with the challenging decisions that the Titan himself has messed up before. Luz finds her last two glyphs rapid-fire after this episode, after the first two were comparatively slow-going. She still has to work for them, by being attentive to nature and to magic, but that change in pacing isn't a coincidence. The Titan is selective about who can be trusted with glyphs — but Luz earns that trust. By being kind to King, first and foremost — but even more specifically, by extending understanding and forgiveness, instead of blame, to a child who had just wanted to play.

And that all culminates in why the Titan trusts Luz to wield the full power of the Boiling Isles in the finale. It's why the Titan believes Luz is a genuine and kind person, who can defeat Belos by force without ever being or becoming as bad as he is — because Luz does give people second chances, and resolve things non-violently, when people aren't as malicious or set in their ways as Belos is. Because Luz gave a second chance to King, and even gave a second chance to the Collector — thus, doing what the Titan couldn't. The Titan trusts Luz not to give into destructive, punitive options — neither killing, nor imprisonment — unless there is truly no other option, in which case killing Belos isn't punitive or retributive in ideology; it's just self-defense.

So, when the Titan makes some of her final words a bread pun, it tells King and Luz and the viewer so much. That the Titan was watching the whole time — but that the Titan was watching Really Small Problems, specifically. That the Titan watched King mature, and the Titan watched Luz forgive him. The Titan watched and made reference to a story about second chances and reconciliation working — because they do work, most of the time, and the fact that Belos is the rare exception is crucial to the message of the finale.

And in a more meta, ironic way — yet one that I'm sure the writers were aware of — the Titan was even watching what some fans called a "filler" episode. But Titan cared so much about Luz and King's development within. And what a brilliant way to tie the whole show together! What a good tribute to the value of gradual character development! And to rewatching a show with fresh eyes, now metaphorically from the Titan's perspective!

It changes everything. It makes you appreciate Luz and King so, so much. It's such a subtle, beautiful writing choice. And the Titan is such a beautiful character. Really Small Problems is not a skippable episode. It always had good character development, but the way it's utilized and recontextualized by the rest of the narrative is nothing short of brilliant.

[tiredandoptimistic]

Crucial thing about Buffy Summers is that she would rather die than have a conversation. She doesn't want to get other people involved in her business if she can help it, and throughout the series we see her become increasingly self-reliant as she learns to trust in her own abilities as the Slayer. The downside to this is that it weakens her connection to her friends as she becomes convinced that they can't understand what she's going through. By the late seasons, Willow and Xander fit the same role relative to Buffy that Joyce did back in high school. To Buffy, it's not worth opening up to them if they'll never really get it. All she'd be doing is pushing her problems onto people who wouldn't be able to help. In addition, thanks to that self-reliance, she always thinks that she can solve everything on her own. She doesn't like to open up about her issues, meaning that her loved ones often don't find out that anything is wrong until it's too late for Buffy to handle it delicately. For instance, when Joyce finds out that Buffy is the Slayer in season two she has a lot of questions that Buffy doesn't have time to answer because the world is literally about to end. In a desperate attempt to keep Buffy from leaving Joyce threatens to kick her out of the house, which obviously wasn't something she should have said even though it wasn't sincere. By refusing to let her mother in on the details of her life until the last possible minute, Buffy put them both in a situation where she was forced to drop the information and run, leading her mother to hate the Slayer calling in season three. Joyce only gets a peak at Buffy's life when the supernatural gets so bad that it's completely out of Buffy's control, which leads to Joyce seeing Buffy's life as nothing but terrible. We see this especially with Angel. Buffy never tells Joyce anything about her relationship with Angel except for when he's evil and planning on killing her, which means that Joyce never trusts Angel even when he's a good guy genuinely trying to protect her.

Switching back to the late seasons; after Buffy comes back from the dead she feels unable to connect with anyone except Spike. She was obviously going through a whole depression in season six and I'm not going to say that she handled it wrong because frankly as long as she made it through alive she did everything right, but this lack of communication with her friends does cause some problems for her. We see in the musical episode Buffy is forced to finally tell the truth about what death was like and how depressed she's been feeling, and it absolutely crushes all of her friends. Not only does their friend find them responsible for her depression, but she also felt the need to lie to them about it because she thinks they'd rather see her as happy than honest. Buffy tries to protect her friends from her life rather than sharing it with them, so everyone ends up upset and isolated. For the next leg of the season she has the whole relationship with Spike going on that she doesn't tell anyone about, which once again means that no one finds out until it's so bad she can't control it. (This is paralleled with Willow's magic addiction in a way that's interesting but I'm not gonna talk about it right now). Xander gets angry at her for sleeping with Spike when we know he had a much more chill reaction back in season five when the Buffybot made everyone think Buffy was with Spike, showing that the circumstances of him finding out had a big impact on his reaction. If Buffy had been up front about the relationship rather than waiting for Spike to spill the beans mid-argument, her friends probably would have been more understanding. Instead, Xander only sees Spike as the guy who starts fights and tries to rape his friend. By season seven Xander and Dawn don't understand why Buffy wants to protect Spike, because she didn't want them to know about any of the relationship so they only got to see the worst of it. If she was willing to share the parts of Spike she found genuinely appealing, she wouldn't have been hiding the relationship in the first place. Instead, everyone else sees him as an irredeemable asshole and Buffy doesn't take their concerns seriously because she can take care of herself.

I think I'm running out of steam so this post is probably approaching its end, but yeah. I think it's super interesting how Buffy works on a "dude, just trust me" level, and you can see throughout the series that her bubble of trust shrinks dramatically. Her fundamental trait of not wanting to share her struggles stays consistent, but as she grows up and gains confidence and competence she ends up willing to let down her mask with fewer and fewer people. She's a uniquely powerful Slayer because of how she draws on the strength of her friends, but she hates that she has to do it and tries to lock them out of her life as soon as she reaches a point where she thinks she can handle it alone. Once things boil over she's always left with a situation that's far worse than if she'd just been upfront with everything, but despite that the people in her life still always support her unconditionally. Joyce welcomes her back into the house with open arms, Giles respects her renewed relationship with Angel, Xander agrees to let Spike live with him despite his concerns. Buffy has so much trouble accepting the love that constantly surrounds her, but it remains anyways.

[miwiheroes]

Dropping Byler Evidence Every (Other) Day Until Season 5

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ Day 30: The 'Will Voice' . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

Something that a lot of bylers have noticed is that Mike uses an especially soft and caring voice to talk to Will. Even when he's angry at him, he's somewhat softer with him than other people. This isn't just some biased view - it's super clear when you compare how he talks to Will to how he talks to others, even El sometimes.

But this isn't a phenomenon that Bylers just made up.

Mike is often characterised as being an asshole, seen this way by a vast number of people in the general audience. They wish that Mike cold go back to the way he was in S2! Which I always found interesting -- the reason why a lot of people feel that he is out of character is largely due to the way that he acts around El and Will. It's not really got to do with any other characters. In fact, he's always been a bit bitchy towards Max and his parents and his sister, but no one got mad at him for that.

However, when he began to act differently toward Will and El in S3, that's when a lot more people began to say that he was out of character. The main difference between S2 and S3 + 4 is the fact that when Mike is not in a relationship with El or believes he isn't (like in S2 when he's comforting Will and in S4 when they're in his bedroom).

Now what does this mean for the Will voice? Well, the only indication that people get that he's kind to Will in S2 and S1 in particular is really down to the Will Voice. If it didn't exist during those crucial comforting scenes, and Finn just used his normal voice, they would not meet the same emotional marks that they need to. And it's super clear that he acts this way around Will and only him.

The writers/directors want Mike to show this vulnerable side of himself to Will for one simple reason -- to build romantic chemistry.

The Will Voice is just another one of those things to add to the pile of what makes Byler a believable pairing and what makes it believable that Will loves Mike and vice versa. It shows that Mike can be vulnerable around Will, shows that, even when his words may not say so, his tone really does.

But what if you still view Mike's scenes with Will and his dialogue with him as something similar to how he's always talked to others? Well, look at this comparison video to see the obvious differences.

Credit for this video goes to @bylerpining

It's always been impactful that Mike is the one speaking to Will like this. He's intentionally presented as this sort of aggressive, easily provoked person, but deep down there is care and kindness inside him. This is what made him so lovable in earlier seasons and what redeems him in later ones.

And when do the writers choose to show this more lovable side of him? With Will. With the aim of showing Will as his better half, someone who brings out his good side.

But, you may argue, the writers don't know about this! It might just be down to Finn's acting!

Then why did they write this scene so that it perfectly highlights the way that Mike talks to Will vs. other people?

Please go to this post to see the video of the scene

This scene is hard proof that the writers are aware of how Mike particularly talks to Will. When Mike is looking at him he talks this way. This scene literally shows that he got distracted by Will and is so highly focused on him that he accidentally forgets to warn everyone that Billy is about to attack.

Max literally has to ask what Mike is saying -- which is to emphasise how particularly soft-voiced he's being, and shows that Mike might even be unaware that he's being this way.

Of course, Mike yells straight after this, only when his head is finally whipped away and he stops focusing on Will. We can chalk his attitude up to him being afraid maybe. But there are so many moments in the show that have Mike showing a very loud and vocal response to being scared/ needing to alert someone. This is different.

All in all, when a character's good and kind side is brought out by another character, I'm pretty sure you're supposed to root for them as a pairing. And that's exactly what's happening here with the will voice.

[pearlprincess02]

virgo sun 6H, gemini moon 2H, pisces rising, leo mercury 5H, libra venus 7H, taurus mars 2H, leo lilith 5H, scorpio 8H

virgo sun: a virgo sun is focused on the details and is keen on refinement. they seek to eliminate what is unnecessary. this critiquing of themselves or those around them plays an important role in their life. at their best they are masters at perfecting something. at their worst they eliminate so much they are left with nothing. this can be people, places, mental or emotional being, or things. a healthy virgo sun knows that perfection does not exist. however, they are able to hold two truths at the same time. they also know how great a tailored suit looks, a recipe that has been tried and tested to perfection, or a graceful dance that has taken years to master. they know the heart of what it takes to excel. so they know not to judge the novice for error. the trick to reaching refinement is careful nurturing for the individual trying. that being themselves or others. a virgo sun shines the brightest when they let go of the need of perfection and have faith in the process.

sun in 6th house: sun in the 6th house people are super focused on health, diet, and daily routines. their sense of self comes from their work and routine. if they mess up their routine or work, they feel lost. these folks are total workaholics and are known for their dedication. good health is crucial for them, and they’re the type to always have hand sanitizer on them, reapplying lotion, sunscreen, and stuff like that. they hate getting sick. they often beat their enemies and can make friends feel competitive. they love helping others and might be doctors, therapists, or into social services. their parents might be doctors too. they’re great at solving arguments and fights, but their dad might blame his failures on others. you find your light through routine, health, and body care. loving yourself as you are is key, even if you’re critical of your imperfections. you do things that are good for your body and get lots of energy and inspiration from animals. your ego shows up a lot at work, so it’s best to find passion in what you do. you can inspire others with a healthy lifestyle or sports.

gemini moon: they have really expressive eyes that light up when something catches their interest. always cracking jokes and endlessly curious, they’re a blast to be around. a bit scattered sometimes, but they’re great at keeping a conversation going. sharp as a tack, they might seem like a clown sometimes, but they’re actually deep thinkers. they are prone to mood swings; their minds are constantly buzzing with a million thoughts, which also impacts their mood. however, they don’t really express or dwell on these emotions much because their minds are wrapped up in their interests, which can make them come across as emotionally closed off. at other times, they tend to rationalize their emotions rather than genuinely feeling them. these people get extremely bored easily, constantly needing mental stimulation. hence, they have a need to always ask questions, to know everything and understand how things work, in order to keep their minds busy. they could be the type who has trouble sleeping because their minds won’t quiet down, and the same goes for their mouth.

moon in 2nd house: you feel comfortable with money. you want your life to be stable and provided. when it is like that, you are calm and satisfied. your comfort zone is chilling at home with netflix. food makes you comfortable and relaxed. also, your values are important to you so you feel comfortable when you follow them and you feel anxious when you make exceptions.

pisces rising: looks like a mermaid, beautiful people and angelic looking but they can’t see that so when people compliment them or stare they don’t really get it, looks different in every photo they’re in, another placement that attracts creeps and stalkers, picks up everyone’s energies around them which is why it’s important for them to be around good people

leo mercury: a leo mercury indicates an energetic and outspoken approach to communication. you likely have a strong need to express yourself and a tendency to do so in a confident and direct manner. you are likely a charismatic and engaging communicator, and you may love to be the center of attention. you may have a tendency to be very bold and aggressive in conversations, and you may not shy away from expressing your thoughts and ideas. you may be drawn to leadership roles in which your powerful communication skills can shine.

mercury in 5th house: you are interested in love and romance. you are communicative and flirty in love. your thoughts are on romance and fun often. you can be a creative person and do well with storytelling. you like to read romantic novels and may publish storybooks for children. you can be good at stockmarket.

libra venus: you can't miss her when she walks into a room, candlelight and wine, charm, beauty, and brains, falls easily, likely has a line of admirers, elegance and grace, now you know why lust and love are seen as magic.

venus in 7th house: venus in the seventh house suggests an emphasis on intimate relationships and one-on-one connections. the individual with this placement may be driven by their desire to find a romantic partner and may be driven to seek out relationships. they may be passionate about their relationships and take great care in cultivating them. additionally, they may have a keen intuition when it comes to relationships and be able to assess the compatibility of different pairings. this placement also suggests having an appreciation for one-on-one conversations and interactions.

taurus mars: caring hands, hedonistic attitudes, down-to-earth until they're not, things are always on their time, level-headed or stable assertiveness, smells good, shares with those they love their soft spot.

mars in 2nd house: mars in the 2nd house is a placement that can have a strong focus on material possessions, self-value, and resources. a person with this placement may have a tendency to be ambitious and driven when it comes to accumulating wealth and creating a comfortable and safe environment. this can also indicate that they may be stubborn or set in their ways about their values and possessions. it can also mean that they may feel defensive about their beliefs, values, or ideals, potentially leading to confrontations if their boundaries are crossed.

leo lilith: you are extremely magnetic and have a diva personality. being pleased and satisfied is important for you in romantic and intimate relationships. you love yourself and express your emotions dramatically. you find most pleasure in being treated like the queen and being adored.

lilith in 5th house: evolved: healing your inner child, marching to the beat of your own drum, knows how to make others feel special, great party planner, decides to do different for your own children, praising yourself instead on looking for praise and admiration from others, making your taboo taste into art, changing the industry. unevolved: using arrogance to make up for feeling small, no sense of reality, boasting, projecting onto your own child, refusing to co parent, going out of your way to get attention, deadly afraid of rejection, gambling, fixation with dark art, baby trapping, gambling, repeating childhood patterns with your own children.

scorpio in 8th house: when dealing with other people’s problems (financially, intimate connection, debts, etc…) it brings about experiences that require you to fix what’s wrong or holding you back in life in rather uncomfortable ways. this can indicate someone who is afraid to acknowledge psychological blockages or who lacks the necessary bravery/instincts to attack underlying problems. you could earn valuable assets (tangible or not) from others when you engage with activities that are “gross” but healing/heroic.

(anon ask)

ᵒᵇˢᵉʳᵛᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ᵃʳᵉⁿ'ᵗ ᵐⁱⁿᵉ

[fourtyforever]

Get in losers were making a fic rec masterlist

Hi y’all it’s me, your local multishipper, and I’m about to be the change I wish to see in the world by putting all the best f1 fics in one place.

Maxiel

cool things to say to your soulmate by @powerful-owl (E, 14k)

A collection of shorter soulmate stories by the great em powerfulowl. Essentially the maxiel thesis as far as I’m concerned. If you ever catch me talking about the goose fic, this is what I’m talking about. Fun story: this was actually the first F1 rpf I ever read and I blame it for why my standards are so fantastically high.

Thursday girl by @boxboxlewis (M, 3k)

Max is outed by the press. Shocking emotional impact to word ratio and off the charts tenderness. Short and sweet and low key a comfort read to me.

the being unknown by anonymous (E, 12k)

Body swap with really unique and emotional vibes. Ngl this one hurt me (in the best way). A fantastic and heart-wrenching take on the horrors of 2022.

Charlos

win or lose (it’s how you play the game) by @f1-stuff (E, 18k)

Hickey bet between charles and carlos. Cannot get over this fic for as long as I live: the silliness is off the charts, the vibes are literally the most perfectly balanced tenderhorny I’ve ever read and the writing is just really that good. I think about this fic minimum once a day.

last night by venerat (E, 24k)

College au. Ngl this one is just especially spicy, but also very very funny and fully captivating top to bottom (see what I did there? haha). Also a great ensemble cast here, which I always love.

Once more (before we die) by @f1-stuff (M, 6k)

Fantasy AU where charlos are princes of warring kingdoms. I love this AU and I love the tenderness between Charles and Carlos that we get out of it. I’m usually not really an AU type of gal but this one really did change my mind.

Playing games by @vegasgrandprix (T, 4K)

Gay chicken. WIP, but I can already tell so clearly exactly where this is going and that is delightful to me. Honestly this really is how they act like 90% of the time already.

Yukierre

match made in heaven by venerat (T, 4K)

Pierre is yuki’s matchmaker. this one is just so sweet and sooooo silly. Comfort read 100%

Loscar

Are they gay or European? (the answer is both) by periwinkle_bumper_cars (T, 30k)

Logan keeps walking in on other drivers in compromising positions. 100% balls to the wall silliness from beginning to end and just completely delightful the whole time. Background carlando, kmag/hulkenberg, brocedes, maxiel, and honestly the ensemble cast is what takes this one from great to top tier.

Landoscar

By a thread by @mctwinkdom (E, 32k)

The classic Australian thongs misunderstanding (gone sexual). Incredibly silly, amazingly hot and honestly a top-tier character study of both Oscar and Lando. A great study in unreliable narration as well (probably part of what accounts for my previous point).

carried away by orphan account (E, 22k)

Fake dating. Honestly this one got me in my feels so much more than I expected from the premise. Sweet and a little bit angsty and just a delightful read all the way down.

Strollonso

green light, red wine (and I don’t feel fine) by @vicsy (E, 19k)

Mafia AU where lance is the son of Fernando’s arch nemesis. THEE strollonso fic of all time I tell you. Unparalleled characterization on the part of both nando and lance, fantastic ensemble cast, FANTASTIC writing, and off the charts unreal spiciness. If you haven’t read this yet then what are you doing

El dick plan by @waddlingpenguin (E, 800)

Lance says ‘daddy,’ both Fernando and Lawrence answer. Short, sweet and SILLY.

camera roll by @penaltyboxboxbox (E, 5k)

Sexting/sex tapes. Overall nice and spicy and just fantastic characterization. Also absolutely crucial is the companion art also by dave penaltyboxboxbox which is literally like the ice cream on top of the cake for such a wonderful fic

silver platter by @wewentcarracing (E, 10k)

getting together fic featuring long suffering estie bestie. Honestly the fic is amazing and spicy and just so well written but Esteban’s ever growing dismay is lowkey my favorite part. Works as a pretty great lance character study as well.

Brocedes

Roseberg’s vs haminkton by @jean----ralphio (E, 16k)

Tattoo artist versus flower shop, except they’re rivals. This is like…just how they are honestly. Absolutely stunning ensemble cast and absolutely hilarious buildup to lewis and Nico finally getting together. Side order of seb just being a massive shit stirrer which honestly I think is the role he belongs in

The real reason nico rosberg retired by periwinkle_bumper_cars (G, 3k)

Secret Santa (gone horribly wrong). This is…..also just how they are unfortunately. The rancidest of vibes but also screeching-out-loud funny.

will be updating this on the reg so stay tuned for more good fics. also maybe if I am very lucky someday I will have my own fics to add to the list. definitely I need to become slightly more insane before I can start writing for this fandom but believe you me I’m well on my way.

[uriel-is-best-girl]

Spoilers for up to ch 130 of Got Dropped into a Ghost Story, Still Gotta Work

Alright, so one thing that Got Dropped into a Ghost Story, Still Gotta Work (what is the abbreviation for this??) really got right is the horror.

Something I often find with these kinds of horror novels (infinite flow, protag having a cheat, excet) is that the horror can often turn into just spooky set dressing, just a background aesthetic. The scares stop being or never were impactful, there's no tension, all that.

This novel, of course, has the "what if someone who's a scaredy-cat was put into the horror setting" gimmick, which means our mc is constantly affected by the setting. Yet, at the same time, Roe also has to survive the horror scenarios somehow, which means he does crazy shit because he has all the answers on his phone to survive. So the real question is how does the author reintroduce fear after giving a character something like that? It's not enough for Roe to be scared and get through the scenarios anyways. I think the two key things at work here is elimination of safety and lasting consequences.

Nowhere is safe. This is a slow realization, one that Roe knew immediately, but has to be proven to the audience. This is a world in which at any moment you could walk into a ghost story. While his job may literally be to enter these ghosts stories, that doesn't make him immune to the inherent nature of this world. The first two nightmares Roe goes through are forced, and sudden, but still controlled in that he was put into them on purpose. But the serial killer mansion? The train to Tamra? Hazards of living in this world, its why he chose to stay with the company after arriving in this universe, because now that he's here there no way to avoid them.

Okay, so the universe itself isn't safe. You could go into a ghost story at anytime, but that isn't the only hazard of simply existing. At work there are terrifying and inhuman (literally or personality wise) coworkers: Kwak Jegang, a researcher who plays with peoples lives, Lee Jaheon, a lizard headed alien, and higher ups who you must carefully dance around, being a well preforming employee without making them suspicious.

And at own home? A haunted doll that you must be friends with, which contains a terrifying being who has a completely different, inhumane value system, and a roommate that will kill or exploit you the moment you let your guard down.

So no place is safe, but worse, is that the author takes it a step further. Nowhere is safe, not even your own mind. The way unreliable narration is used in conjunction with the contamination is chilling. It was terrifying for me to realize with Roe what was happening. That neither of us noticed, and that he was about to go back to not noticing. It was a sickening tension, and afterwards when we see some of the things that were suppressed by the corruption, the hints he left for Lee Jaheon? It adds to the horror, because he was fighting it, but all your best efforts are lost when you're fighting against your own mind. When you forget that you're trying to fight something at all.

Built into this, and being the other crucial element, is lasting consequences. The nightmares they enter are onetime, self-contained things rights? Yes, there's always a danger of accidentally entering them but once you leave it's all over right? Turns out it's more complicated than just a scenario that randomly appears and repeats! What happens in the nightmares, and the relationships made with the monsters, isn't self-contained. The two most potent examples are probably the tattoo from the Blue Mascot, and Roe's relationship with Braun.

To be honest Roe and Braun's relationship is I think one giant example of this and I'm probably going to do a whole other post about their relationship. For a majority of the novel the consequences of messing with, or making Braun mad have been built up. Roe is terrified both because of all the stories of people mistreating haunted dolls, and also because he saw firsthand how powerful Braun is. And when the time comes that it happens, Roe makes Braun mad, its sufficiently terrifying. There was no way for Roe of the alien coalition rescuing him to defeat Braun through brute force, and remember. Nowhere is safe. There was nowhere that Roe could run where Braun wouldn't eventually find him.

Actually, thinking about it, I'm noticing a theme as I type this out... Because with both Braun and Blue Mascot the only way out of the situation, the only solution, was to talk to them, and isn't that interesting? I'll have to make a different post analyzing that...

Anyways, I've gone on for long enough now, conclusion is that I really love this novel and idk what I'm going to do while I wait for more chapters to accumulate...

[luigra]

Why the nuke ending was good and important for the story, and why it was NOT retconned: an important essay

So, I& assume that most people here have only really watched DSMP through Tommy's POV. Maybe a few other of the most popular POVs. Even more people have just... straight up never watched the actual streams and got all their info off of social media. I& get it, I& can't blame you. But because of that you all have missed out on the absolutely crucial reasoning for why the nuke ending needed to be Like That.

I& will try to sum up Jack Manifold's lore here real quick, but I& can't ever do it justice in a text post, so I& implore you all to watch at least one or two of his lore streams, preferably the one in which he exploded the hotel and his POV of the finale, those are the two best ones lore-wise, and he re-explains his motivations quite frequently.

The biggest thing with his character is that he has always been forgotten about. Treated as a side character to the "main protagonist". He was never noticed, his three deaths were completely ignored, and no matter what he would do, people would always look past him to focus on whatever the big plot was. In his own words, he tried to kill Tommy and he didn't even care.

As the result of this mistreatment, literally having everything taken away from him - his home, his friends, his lives - he tries to find the root of it all, and comes to the conclusion that Tommy is to blame for it all, because he was his friend once but is now the cause of the server fighting all the time.

All of this is to say, he is an important narrative foil to Tommy - where Tommy struggles with just wanting to move past Exile and his trauma, Jack instead clings to everything that hurt him and just wishes to be noticed. He wants his pain to be acknowledged, and in doing so he spirals further and further into self destruction. He burns down Manifoldland. He blows up the hotel.

And finally, he blows up the world.

It was his desperate cry to be seen, a natural conclusion to his mental issues that everybody just ignored. But now, they couldn't ignore him anymore. They physically COULDN'T. And THAT, is why the ending is so brilliant. Because throughout all the trials and tribulations, Jack finally gets what he always wanted. He finally gets to kill Tommy the way he wanted to kill him, and at last, nobody can ignore him, this forgotten and abandoned kid that just tries to make things right, Jack Manifold.

BUT HE ISN'T ACTUALLY HAPPY ABOUT TOMMY DYING. IN HIS LAST MINUTE, HE REALIZES THAT HE'S BEEN MISGUIDED ALL ALONG AND WITH TUBBO'S HELP HE REALIZES THAT ALL HE REALLY WANTED WAS FOR HIS FRIENDS TO ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT HIM AGAIN.

SO HE TRIES TO SAVE HIS FRIEND AND LITERALLY GOES INTO LAVA TO TRY AND REACH HIM (THE SAME LAVA THAT TOMMY THREW HIM IN AND KILLED HIM WITH)

BUT IT'S TOO LATE.

IT'S PURE FUCKING CINEMA.

IT'S THE MOST TRAGIC ENDING EVER. IT'S THE BEST POSSIBLE WAY TO HAVE ENDED THE SERIES, WITH AN UNDERDOG WHOM EVERYBODY IGNORED UNTIL IT WAS TOO LATE, FINALLY GETTING HIS LAST SPOTLIGHT. FINALLY HAVING A SMIDGE OF HOPE THAT SOMEONE OUT THERE MIGHT CARE ABOUT HIM IF HE JUST TRIES AGAIN.

So what does that mean for the latest new stream? It means that Jack finally got his closure and got to talk to Tommy. And he learnt how to move on. He doesn't center his life around him anymore.

But he does wish for Tommy to be happy. Even if he himself can't, even if he's still stuck gambling and addicted and all alone with no one by his side, he finally moved on from Tommy. He finally planted Manishroom in the ruins of his burnt down house.

And the fact of the matter is, this has been streamed from Jack's POV. And now, this is his story. Let him have this. The fact that his actions left an impact is important.

Let us, the manifolders, have this. Please. The nuke ending was never about Tommy or Dream or whatever. It was always about Jack.

[belphegored]

°•♡ Minors dni • light impact play (reader slaps Amon), verbal humiliation, nursing handjob

Giving something, anything to Amon. It might break him... no, it'll surely break him. But no, it's not like he cares. He is gonna take anything you give him, any scrap of your time, of your touch, of your attention, is enough and too much for him at once and he's sorry, has he already said he's so so sorry? He fucks things up so often, he honestly understands if you don't want to have anything to do with him, but-

He takes after Beel's habits: today he wandered and accidentally took four hours to "get" your coffee, though when finally showed up, he did so empty handed.

Sometimes you think Amon does all that on purpose. That he likes to see you weighing your options so as to how to even react to such carelessness, and putting together two and two day by day: how he probably gets off on your tired sighs and huffs and eyerolls and tongue clicks whenever he conveniently forgets to pick up something crucial from the store, how patting his head and saying you don't mind his mistakes does little to nothing for him, and the sure and best way to get him going is to abuse of him a little.

How he's just going to keep doing the same thing over and over as long as you are around.

"A bit of both, maybe?" Yes. He laughs. "Again...what's the difference? and it drives you insane.

"Are you dumb or are you stupid?" your eyes are trained on his hand holding the crumpled receipt but no coffee. & you sigh and swear you didn't intend the words come off like that, so harsh, but instead of reacting negatively, Amon laughs and looks away somewhat flustered.

So you make up your mind against common sense and grip his pretty face, already flustered, with force and then release it to hit him ever so lightly, playfully.

"Yeah? Bit of both? You think it's funny?"

In retrospective, forgetting about your coffee isn't such a big deal, but fuck if he doesn't makes you want to slap him around a bit. The fact that he enjoys it...You're not too sure how to feel about it.

He bites his lower lip so as to not to laugh or whine or say something that will put him at a real disadvantage (meaning that you'll get pissed off for real and draw that warm hand back) and mumbles a little "sorry..." this time- sounds and looks so fucking pretty, when he looks at you like that...

"You don't look sorry, though..." you say, more sigh. He really does not, and even if he were, the bulge in his trousers and the clear bead on the tip of his horn betray all the other things going through his mind and body.

Your knee pushes his thighs apart to nudge at the throbbing bulge and you slap him across the face again, but this time hard enough that your hand leaves a reddening imprint like a burn.

Amon whimpers. Of fucking course he does.

So "no use..." A dry little laugh escapes you, "you love it, dont you?" and you slap him again, "think you do all that on purpose, don't you, baby?"

Amon can only aim to stammer "N-no, nuh-huh, maybe, well...yeah, yes, I do."

You swear he's drooling- or he actually is, you thumb swipes along the corner of his mouth to gather the saliva and smear it across his lips bitten bruised and red cheek and he swears by all he believes on that he'll be good, so good for you, that he won't do it again (as long as you keep messing him up -which takes so little...-, pushing against his needy cock like that).

.

"S'okay, c'mere..." you concede at last; its just the way he humps your leg all dumb every time you hit him and how he stammers through a mess of apologies, begging for you to do anything, that you can't walk away from him and pretend you're actually angry.

"Not really mad at you, y'know? You're such a little slut, I could never" your hand now inside his uniform trousers carelessly pulls his throbbing cock out, lets it leak in your saliva-slick palm, hot and so hard you can barely wrap around it.

Amon just mewls pathetic like asking "really?", as if he couldn't believe you, or as if his body couldn't care less wether you thought him the most capable demon or a dumb piece of flesh as long as you kept pumping him as you do, tortuously slow strokes and a tight grip, trying to milk him.

"Fuck, you're a mess, aren't you?" you massage the tip of his hyper-sensitive dick with your thumb and he sobs, whines, tears up, flusters, drools- you almost feel a little pity.

.

"Here" it's an invitation: your neckline lowered and breasts that spill for him to nuzzle, kiss, look up at you from between them like a needy puppy who only ever needed affection, and you touch his fat cock and stimulate him, make it weep fat droplets of pre gathering, making it slick, and "keep that pretty mouth busy."

It doesn't take more than that to have him latched to your tits, suckling on a nipple until its tender before moving to the other one, slobbering all over you, messy and ruined because you're so terrible kind but your hand never stops stroking him and he-

"S'good, s-so..." He babbles whenever he pulls back to breathe in broken and his back arches, hips thrust forward so that he can hump himself into your fist, "feels nice..."

You know he won't last any longer just by the way his cock kicks in your palm.

"You like that, baby?"

Amon nods, breathless.

"Uh-huh, so close..."

Faster.

"It's okay, you can let go now, baby, cum for me...", pumping him until he whimpers against your tit and you pull him up for a real kiss as he comes undone, your tongue invading his hot mouth. He spills with a shiver, makes a mess between you both, hips still thrusting against nothing when your hand let's go of his still aching cock.

[ayebibs]

What would have made the Veilguard companions more compelling?

I keep racking my brain trying to determine how the marketing of this game was so focused on the companions, their rich lives outside of the narrative, and the journeys that they go on when I think that they are objectively the worst written companions to date. Not to say that their appearances aren’t well designed or that they don’t have really fun and cute moments, but they are simply less three-dimensional than previous companions. Fundamentally, my biggest grievance with the Veilguard companions is that I just don’t find any of them nuanced or interesting. They are all good people, but they are not good or believable characters that fit this plot and interact with it in meaningful ways.

I have never been one of those people that ignore canon, but I have been perseverating on the missed potential of this highly anticipated game that we’ve waited ten years for. So, I wanted to criticize some of these characters and explore some changes that might’ve made for a more compelling group of characters had they been written differently, but (hopefully) respecting the vision of who the characters are at their core because I do think that the skeleton of something great is here.

Disclaimer because this is long and critical: There are a lot of spoilers below. I haven’t read all of the Dragon Age books and I could be missing things, but I also think that the game and the characters’ journeys should speak for themselves as we go through the story. I also get that these are just my opinions, I’m a STEM girlie by trade and a creative on the side! Not everything I suggest may be great or realistic for building a plot or realistic for writing the script of a videogame. I also don’t mind conversations about these characters! I think that would be fun, I just don’t want to be shat on for being very disappointed in this game when it’s been my favorite video game series for half my life and I went in very hyped and willing to excuse a lot!

Alright, if you’re still with me, buckle up!

First, before I outline the specific changes I would make to each character, I want to address that there are just flaws with the way BioWare decided to handle companions as a whole in this game. I want to mention them now because they impact nearly every character and I don’t become repetitive:

1. Most importantly, the approval system is pointless and probably could be left out of this game for all it means to the narrative. It is nearly impossible to wrack up disapproval for the companions and you increase approval and bond by just taking companions out and completing a quest. If the companions like nearly everything that Rook does, then it means that they don’t care enough about anything to have strong rigid opinions (which is good for a well-written character). If companions don’t have an opportunity for meaningful agreements or disagreements, it means that the writing is not what people expect of a Dragon Age game based on every single installment we’ve had so far. It is one of the few things that have stayed the same in all of the past games and one of the things that I think fans are really upset about and should have been nonnegotiable.

2. All of the factions (except for maybe the Grey Wardens) really just needed to be messier and more complicated. Not all of the factions were meant to be heroic throughout the series. As others have commented, the Lords of Fortune and the Antivan Crows are the most glaring examples of this. However, I think that the Mournwatch and Veiljumpers are not exempt from this either. The factions serve as crucial parts of our companion’s backstory and by sanitizing them, we are wiping key opportunities for character development. For example, it could be way more interesting to have a character who fundamentally disagrees with their faction, but doesn’t know how to escape it. Or, what about a character who loves their faction and makes us feel conflicted about them because of their willingness to explain away the faction’s history? I could write (another) essay on this, so I’ll leave this point here.

3. We simply needed to have more conversations with all of the companions. All we have are these short, uninteresting cutscenes to learn about the companions. The player should be able to go up to the companions and ask them about the history of their faction, who they trust and care about in their faction (and why), their past, and their opinions about new information (on other companions, side quests, and plot points). None of these even need a cutscene, just voice acting. It would also help players feel more connected to the companions.

4. There needed to be more visible personal and interpersonal conflict. The companions read like coworkers to me. They mostly like each other and, even if they do have disagreements, they are never explored in the narrative. They don’t seem to have any hugely conflicting viewpoints on any topic and, even if they do, they are benign. For example, what to pack for a camping trip or not wanting to talk about a particular topic (dragons vs. spirits) can be interesting in addition to more complex banter but the banter just feels inappropriate and irrelevant for the plot of this game. Overall, the companions rarely make a fit about anything. It feels like the writers didn’t want any character to appear problematic, but they made them flat because none of them seem to have a hill to die on except that they should save the world. This might have been fine in a game series that didn’t focus so heavily on companions and the way that ethics are shaped by personal experience, but this is not that imaginary game series.

5. The companion quests should have focused more on worldbuilding and getting to know the characters. I have little to say about this other than that the quests for Harding to try out her powers, training Assan with Davrin, shopping with Lucanis, and lighting candles with Emmrich, etc. were lazy, uncreative filler. I really cannot put it any other way. They should have all had quests that better explored their faction and, by extension, them. We barely learn anything in those quests and they are time wasters. Those are the scenes that should have been converted to a codex entry, not some of the important lore drops that we currently have in the codex.

6. Rook chooses one option of a binary for every companion towards the end of their personal quests. I’m okay with some of these, I think that it made sense for Bellara and Davrin to ask Rook what to do in their personal quests because it felt more natural. A friend asking a friend for their input. On the other hand, some of these are really inconsequential, semantic, and mindset related (Neve) and others are such personal choices that it feels inappropriate for Rook to be involved (Emmrich and Lucanis). In a lot of these cases, it would have made more sense to have dialogue options sprinkled throughout the game that influenced companions to make their ultimate choices. Giving Rook so much power in these decisions makes the companions feel one-dimensional because it strips them of agency that any believable character would want. Even if they wanted Rook to make these decisions, companions should have felt more strongly towards the options and either praised or disparaged Rook for their decision.

7. Finally, I found all of the romances very lackluster. I was never someone who considered Dragon Age games glorified dating sims (I actually really don’t like that take, even if it's all jokes), but I found myself missing the depth of relationships in previous games. All the relationships felt too new and shallow. Largely, I think this is due to points 3 and 4, but also due to a lack of reactivity with your companions. For example, companions barely acknowledge you getting them a gift or flirting. This could have also been helped by a few extra cutscenes with the companions.

That mostly covers the overarching issues that apply to all characters. Some of these things might come back in my individual discussions of the characters if it is particularly bad.

If you’re still with me, here are my thoughts on each companion and/or what I think would have made them more interesting:

Bellara

I came to like Bellara much more than I anticipated from the trailers and marketing. However, she is really emblematic of how the writers didn’t want problematic characters. There is nothing in the game that would cause people to accuse her of being problematic, but despite being an elf (a historically oppressed and enslaved group), she is so quick to apologize for the actions of ancient elves who oppressed her ancestors thousands of years ago which is ridiculous and solves nothing. It also really seems like the writers wanted her flaw or quirkiness to be some kind of neurodivergence and nerdiness and that alone doesn’t make a compelling character. I actually think it would be interesting if Bellara was, if not pro-Solas, pro-hearing him out because his intentions were in the interest of the elven people even though he made some shitty decisions. I think she would want to be interested in what Solas knew about the ancient elves and what their society looked like before the Veil. I think she’d want to know as much as she could about the technology. I think it would be interesting if she guiltily admitted to wondering what the world would look like if the Veil came down. How different would it really be to what they’re already experiencing? Could they not mitigate the problems? I think this would be an excellent point of tension between Bellara and Davrin (who is Dalish but might not understand her curiosity in the face of the blight) or Harding (whose people were so impacted by Solas and Mythal’s actions… more on Harding later).

Davrin

Davrin is actually my favorite companions in this game, but I still wanted more from him. I think it would be really interesting if, when the team is gathered around after Weisshaupt that Davrin really pushed back against the idea of sorting out their personal shit before progressing. He’s a grey warden who, in his estimation, just failed his one purpose. I think that this would cause a bit of tension between him and some other characters, like maybe Taash whose concerns are more personal than anyone else's at the time. He is serious and straightforward, so I don’t think it’d be out of character and it would make their friendship and training montage more satisfying later on if they had to move on from it. I would also expand on the fact that he was disappointed to not die when he killed one of the archdemons? It was touched on so briefly and he seems to emotionally resolve it in a few dialogue lines which I think is crazy, even considering that he wants to live to save the griffons and raise Assan. A “blow up” about how the team needs to put their personal affairs aside while struggling to keep his own personal affairs together would introduce a little more depth to his plot line and expand on one of the more interesting things about him that we barely got any time with.

Harding

Harding was one of the most boring characters to me in this game because she felt so flat and there were so many ways to make her more interesting. Her character isn’t helped by the Varric twist because the narrative requires that she doesn’t grieve except for one scene despite knowing Varric for at least a decade. Personally, I think that changing her reaction if/when she finds out what Solas and Mythal did to the Titans and her people would make her more well-rounded and believable. From that point on, Harding should be anti-Solas and you should lose approval with her every time you entertain the idea of trusting him. Maybe she could even express disappointment/frustration/sadness for an Inquisitor who believes Solas can be saved or speak of them more highly if they think that he is irredeemable. Also, we should’ve spent more time with her and the dwarven people. I think Veilguard was such a rushed and half-baked attempt at wrapping up that storyline. We learned so much about the dwarves in the last two games and we get to spend so little time with them.

Taash

Interestingly, I think Taash is one of the few companions with really obvious flaws. They are childish and impatient, but they’re poorly written and their flaws are never acknowledged or treated as flaws by the narrative. In my playthrough, their relationship with Harding might have been an interesting place to explore and address that childishness. It was also a missed opportunity for them to explore Qunari and Rivaini culture. As other people have commented, the binary choice between being Rivaini or Qunari is odd in tandem with Taash’s journey of self-discovery and identity. I think that choice shouldn’t exist and should be encouraged by dialogue options peppered throughout their larger quest. We were so close to exploring the rift that can form in families between first generation children and immigrant parents (and learning more about Rivain and the Qun by extension) when there is love but a fundamental difference in culture and lived experience. Instead, I feel like the narrative never gave us a chance to really hear Shathann out before her death, but I’ll give the writers a break because I think that they were going for tragedy and unresolved conflict and I don't know if I trust them to make that a conversation that fits the world and isn't anachronistic.

Emmrich

The thing that bothered me most about the Emmrich storyline was the final choice between Emmrich becoming a lich and bringing back Manfred. This is another choice that Rook should have influenced rather than choose outright. The number of times that you asked probing questions or commented on Emmrich’s desire to become a lich through more conversations about Emmrich’s fear of death and relationship with Manfred should have determined his final decision. Personally, it felt inappropriate for Rook to make that decision directly for him, no matter how much the game tried to justify it. I would have also liked to see his fear of death impact him more throughout his quest line and the narrative. The final quests are literally a suicide mission and he should have had more dialogue regarding it.

Neve

I’m going to admit that Neve was hardened in my playthrough and I haven’t explored her character in playthroughs where you save Dock Town, so this section might not be applicable to half of you. I didn’t understand a lot of Neve’s motivation behind her actions. I didn’t understand why she felt so passionately about her city or her jobs. Her drive felt hollow to me, making her personal quests feel generic. When I got to Neve’s quest where we gathered clues near the water in Dock Town, I was excited to finally learn anything about her, but it was devoid of any meaningful backstory. I would have written the quest to better explore Neve’s past, motivations, and personal relationships. The other big thing that stands out is that Neve is a noir detective and the VA has clearly gotten direction to sound like one, but her story is so devoid of mystery, intrigue, and many of themes that would make that more than aesthetic. And, like, isn’t her whole faction about freeing slaves? Why not make her personal quest more closely tied to that?

Lucanis

Lucanis’ personal quests are so tied to the dynamics of his faction, so I think a lot could have been solved by making the Crows more morally grey. I think Teia and Viago could have stayed the same, but we should have seen more negative interactions between him and the rest of the Crows. Outside of Illario, Catarina would have been an exceptional vessel to explore the problems within the Crows and a theme like generational trauma or exploitation. The party banter between him and Davrin criticizing each other's factions could have been an excellent space to talk about the negative aspects of the Crows and how Lucanis’ feels about them, either defend some misdeeds or express how he feels conflicted about his past contracts. In my game (when you save Treviso), Spite also felt more like a mildly important accessory in Lucanis’ plot than a significant problem. Few characters had anything significant to say about Spite and he caused few problems. I actually thought Spite was fun for most of the game, but he needed to be more problematic because he gave the impression that he was included more to build an aesthetic for Lucanis than a character-defining plot point. Finally, I think Rook deciding what to do with Illario was a poor decision. I would have written this as a decision Lucanis makes on his own based on how Rook encourages him to deal with Spite through a more fleshed out character arc.

This pretty much summarizes my thoughts on all of the companions. As you can tell, I am very Normal about this game.

I wanted to like these characters so much and they have an unbelievable amount of potential. They are all so fascinating in concept and all of them are poorly executed either due to the relationship building mechanics of the game, because of the writing and dialogue, or a mixture of both. That said, there are brief moments when I like them and I get glimpses of what they could’ve been.

I just hope the characters are better explored in future games (if we get one).

[mariacallous]

Last month, the Trump administration placed a $1 spending limit on most government-issued credit cards that federal employees use to cover travel and work expenses. The impacts are already widely felt.

At the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, scientists aren’t able to order equipment used to repair ships and radars. At the Food and Drug Administration, laboratories are experiencing delays in ordering basic supplies. At the National Park Service, employees are canceling trips to oversee crucial maintenance work. And at the Department of Agriculture and the Federal Aviation Administration, employees worry that mission-critical projects could be stalled. In many cases, employees are already unable to carry out the basic functions of their job.

“The longer this disruption lasts, the more the system will break,” says a USDA official who was granted anonymity because they aren’t authorized to speak to the media about the looming crisis.

A researcher at the National Institutes of Health who tests new vaccines and treatments in rodents says he has had to put experiments on hold; his lab is not able to get certain necessary materials, such as antibodies, which are needed to assess immune response. “We have animals here that are aging that will pretty soon be too old to work with,” says the researcher, who requested anonymity as they aren’t authorized to speak publicly about the agency. Young mice and rats that are 6 to 8 weeks old are typically used for drug and vaccine studies, but some of the animals in their lab have now aged out of that window and may have to be euthanized.

They say NIH workers have been using internal listservs to ask for reagents and lab equipment from other buildings or institutions to try to compensate for shortages, but they’re not always able to track down what they need. The NIH is made up of 27 institutes and centers, and its Bethesda, Maryland, campus is spread across more than 75 buildings. “Sometimes you need something that's really niche, and you're just not going to find it from someone else on campus,” they say.

The change comes as Elon Musk’s so-called Department of Government Efficiency continues to hunt for alleged examples of waste across the federal government. Late last month, DOGE announced that it was working to “simplify” the government’s largest credit card program, which issues GSA SmartPay travel and purchase cards for federal employees. Last Wednesday, the agency claimed 24,000 cards had been deactivated.

The credit card program allows federal workers to bypass the typical procurement process required to buy goods and services. A 2002 report from the Department of Commerce said that, “by avoiding the formal procurement process, GSA estimates the annual savings to be $1.2 billion.” It also enables federal employees to avoid paying sales tax on expenses that the government is exempt from.

At the FDA, labs that analyze samples to ensure that food, drugs, medical devices, and cosmetics are safe and meet regulatory standards are already facing shortages. "While we are always acutely aware of when Congress’ funding is going to run out, we are able to order supplies to keep things going in the lab. This abrupt ending felt like the rug was being pulled out from under us," says an employee at the FDA who requested anonymity because they aren't authorized to speak with the media.

The employee recently placed an order for pipette tips, an essential laboratory supply, but found that order was put on hold. "Now we are running out, asking colleagues at other offices to share what they might not be using,” they told WIRED.

In addition, workers say FDA labs now have to go through a lengthy process to order liquid nitrogen, which is used to keep ultra-cold freezers running. These freezers preserve samples of cells and other biological material that reflect years, and sometimes decades, of research. Delays in getting liquid nitrogen tanks could destroy that material. Previously, new tanks could usually be acquired the same day as putting in a request. Now, it takes a week or so to receive a tank after initiating a request.

An employee at the Environmental Protection Agency says her facility is not able to place regular orders of liquid nitrogen at the moment. “We have dozens of these freezers full of important environmental samples that are imminently at risk of being lost because we can no longer get our regular shipments of liquid nitrogen,” says the employee, who requested anonymity. These samples are used as part of research on detection and remediation methods for chemicals such as PFAS, which are found in many products and break down very slowly over time.

“Scientists are being forced to jerry-rig the connection points on these freezers to accept pressures of liquid nitrogen they were not designed to handle,” the employee says. “Divisions are resorting to bartering with each other to obtain needed items.”

The FDA and EPA did not immediately respond to a request for comment from WIRED.

The credit card freeze also means that federal researchers who were working on scientific manuscripts can’t pay journal fees, meaning they can’t submit their work to certain journals for publication.

An employee at a federal forensics lab told WIRED that spending limits mean the lab is no longer able to pay to ship evidence back to agents, effectively halting its ability to do casework. Before a case goes to trial, defendants have the right to access and review evidence that the prosecution intends to use against them, which includes access to the evidence in their case. Defendants are able to send that evidence to an outside lab for analysis if they choose. “Cases can’t progress until we return the evidence,” says the forensics lab worker, who asked to remain anonymous. “I basically can’t do my job right now.”

NIH employees were told that travel cards could not be used at all for 30 days, forcing scientists to cancel plans to attend a major infectious disease conference next week. USDA employees at the Pest Identification Technology Laboratory have stockpiled reagents used for molecular tests in advance of the spending limits, according to the USDA official.

FAA employees who travel to work on and test aviation systems worry the credit card freeze will prevent them from completing their projects. “We are allowed to use our personal cards in emergencies but none of us trust them to pay us back now,” says one employee.

The impacts have hit the National Park Service as well. One employee was poised to go on a trip to oversee road maintenance at a national monument when the change went into effect on February 20. “Unless I want to pay for it myself, I can’t go. I can’t pay for my hotel, my rental car, fuel for the car. Now I can’t carry out the mission,” the employee says. “Today, instead of focusing on other work, I’m focused on three different contingencies on how to handle this. Do I go? Do I call my engineering team and tell them to reschedule? And if so, when? The project is on an indefinite hold.”

A memo written to staff at the National Park Service specified that “all travel that is NOT related to national security, public safety, or immigration enforcement should be canceled if it begins on Wednesday, February 26, through the end of March 2025.” A long-term decision on the travel policy, it said, will come “at a later date.” Some NPS staffers were able to travel in February despite not getting official clearance. They have now been told no travel will be allowed in March. To date, roughly 75 trips have been canceled or rescheduled, according to a source familiar with the situation.

The National Park Service did not respond to a request for comment from WIRED.

Some government employees say they were given a warning prior to the change being announced on February 20. “We went out and bought cases and cases of toilet paper the night before,” another current employee at the National Park Service says. “There’s a general acknowledgement that things are going to break.”

That employee works in the Pacific West Region, which manages federal land in California, Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Idaho, and Nevada, as well as parks in Arizona, Montana, Guam, and American Samoa. While the GSA did allow for the possibility of exceptions to the clamp-down, the employee claims there are only four purchase cards with spending limits above $1 available for the entire region.

Some of these parks pay for services like internet and wireless on purchase cards—leaving staffers wondering if their work devices could soon be cut off. “Before someone can fix a bathroom a work order has to be issued,” the current employee explains. “That happens electronically. Like any business, we rely on email, Teams, and chat to get things done.”

The spending limits reflect Musk’s belief in zero-based budgeting. After he purchased Twitter, he slashed the budget to zero and forced employees to justify every expense. He also froze people’s corporate credit cards.

“With the Twitter pausing of payments, at some point we were in a meeting at 1 am on a Saturday, and it was like, ‘Hey, let's turn the credit cards off to see what bounces, and what happens,’" explained angel investor Jason Calacanis on the All In podcast in February. (Calacanis was part of Musk’s transition team at Twitter.) “And of course, we started getting calls ... The people who come first, they're probably the ones who are in on the biggest grift.”

Employees see it a different way. “There are so many controls in place to make sure fraud doesn’t happen,” alleges the current NPS staffer. “I honestly believe the only fraud occurring is being committed by Musk, [Russell] Vought, and [Donald] Trump.”