#which I like better? I like when the companions get to choose their own fate! I like wyll taking a stand for himself! it was awesome!

[forcedhesitation]

I finished act 2 again, but properly this time. and I cannot even begin to put into words how satisfying and beautiful all of that was. I loved act 2 the first time I played, but figuring out how to save the last light this time, properly completing halsin's quest, storming moonrise towers with jaheira and her harpers, seeing aylin reunite with isobel...all of it. I love it even more. and the beginning of act 3 feels all the more rewarding, having fixed my past errors.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello and thank you so much for your service for all this years! My question can be a little too specific so if fic strike at least some of points it's still cool. I'm looking for human au with heavy accent on Aziraphale and his angelic siblings. It can be something nice and family fluffy, sure, not all in his family is a dicks, but I'm thinking more about something like Aziraphale dealing with years of family abuse and finally relearning how to live without shame and fear; Crowley getting to look at Aziraphale's family close after years of "they are nice we just don't get along" and being utterly terrified; Crowley helping Aziraphale to learn to stand his ground and being all proud when he got it; Crowley and Aziraphale bonding over familial traumas; etc. Also can be with hints of season two, like Aziraphale trying to reconnect with family or saving Muriel (or even "Jim") from same abuse and being all gentle and understanding (and making Crowley proud again). Absolutely no to victim blaming (I mean from Crowley or author pov, from Aziraphale's or family pov sure), preferably without heavy fatshaming, preferably older Aziraphale and Crowley (no to kid and teen aus, meh to college/young adults, yes to 30+ and absolutely YES to 40+). Great if it's longish and kind of plottish fic! Super great if there would be autistic Aziraphale, not cis Aziraphale, in any way disabled Aziraphale, religious trauma, cptsd and did I mentioned supportive Crowley? Btw it can be not Aziraphale-centric fic, if it's just romance or even Crowley-centric but themes are there, I'm interested. Anyway as I said it's probably too specific so anything that "kind of close" will do. Thanks in advance!

Here are some adult human aus in which Aziraphale's family are Not Nice...

The Long Road Home by TawnyOwl95 (E)

Aziraphale Heavensby only knows about love from books. So when he's given a chance to experience romance first hand he grabs it as hard as he can. Even if it can't last. Even if Aziraphale’s father has very definite plans for his future. Plans that certainly don't include Anthony Crowley.

Drink You In by FinnsKeeper (G)

Aziraphale Fell owns a rather popular bar in Soho London. His life is relatively calm and predictable until he meets Anthony Crowley one fateful night. When a first date goes wrong, Aziraphale has to take measures to protect his newest patron. Anthony's gratitude quickly morphs into something deeper, and Aziraphale has to battle his own demons to determine if those feelings are true or just a product of his impromptu rescue.

Someone by Diminua (M)

This was a kinkmeme prompt and as usual I can't do better than to paraphrase the OP : Aziraphale is a frumpy, middle aged man, who's closing in on 50 : he's spent his entire life alone, mistreated by his family, and living like a modern times hermit in his familiar, reassuring bookshop. He thinks it's too late for passion. But he hopes that, maybe, he could find a companion for his latter days. Crowley has spent his entire life having a wild time: parties, sex, rock n roll, all that jazz. He flew through the 80s, the 90s, the new millennium like a car on fire. He thought he had time, thought he'd be young and surrounded by people forever, thought with fling after fling after fling, someone would find him. Someone would look at him and choose him. But no one ever did. To paraphrase (again) - they turn to an arranged marriage company. And they fit..

Dating in the Dark by miraworos (E)

Anthony J. Crowley, owner of a failing joke-shop, and Aziraphale, bookshop proprietor with an overbearing family, meet as contestants on a blind dating show. They form an instant connection as roommates but soon find themselves at odds as they compete to win the top spot, and the favor of the same lady.

The Ghost of Husbands Past by A_N_D (E)

Az always knew that he’d be thrown out the moment his father found out he was gay. He hadn’t expected to be declared dead though - or for his husband to believe it! But their marriage had been a foolish teenage impulse (not to mention invalid in America), so when Az moved to a small town far upstate New York to start his new life, he moved alone. The kindest thing he could do was let Crowley mourn and move on, not be shackled for life to a now disabled partner. Tony Crowley never recovered from losing his best friend, his childhood sweetheart, his better half. He’d been drifting ever since; no plans, no hope, no money - and now, just before Thanksgiving, no job either. Given the stark choice of freezing to death or accepting his sister’s invitation to join her upstate, Tony reluctantly lives out the Hallmark cliche of Recently Unemployed Person Moves to Small Town for Christmas. It’s a time of hope, love, and family. It’s time for Az and Tony to find each other again.

love like yours (will surely come my way) by CCs_World (T)

Dr Zira Fell is a new professor of theology at St Beryl's University. His first day there he meets the mysterious and enchanting Dr AJ Crowley, an art history professor and a painter. They almost immediately become friends, and spend most of their time getting lunch together, talking, drinking wine, making art, and falling slowly in love with one another. Featuring cameos of everyone's favorite (and least favorite) characters, gratuitous descriptions of paintings, long text messaging conversations, and one cranky cat.

- Mod D

[umbracirrus]

Umbracirrus Writing Masterlist

Originally, some of my writing masterlist was contained within my pinned post, though it hadn't been updated since April, and the post in question felt horribly long. So, I decided to make this list separate to my pinned post and to have it link to this instead.

It is split into multi-chapter fanfictions and oneshots, with the oneshots all at the bottom. It only includes things which I have posted at least one chapter of (or posted all of, in the case of oneshots)! And I happen to have.... Well, a lot of other things in progress not even mentioned here.

Masterlist last updated: 27th October 2024

Multi-Chapter fics

The Perfect Storm (On AO3) - In Progress

Skyrim fanfiction

Balgruuf the Greater/Dragonborn (Elyse Verne - OC); background Irileth/Hrongar

Rated E on AO3

Slow burn, Romance, Skyrim's chaotic politics, Skyrim Civil War, eventual sexual content

Summary:

“What do you think will burn better? Another ballad of Mikael’s about Whiterun’s ‘assets’, or yet another letter from Ulfric Stormcloak asking for me to join him?" When the Dragonborn is facing pressure to choose a side in the brewing war, she sticks with the side which holds a special place in her heart. She picks Whiterun.

Seeking the Sun (On AO3) - In Progress, precursor to The Perfect Storm

Skyrim fanfiction

Dragonborn (Elyse Verne - OC)

Rated M on AO3

Adventure, Angst, Skyrim main quest, minor canon divergence

She was free to go wherever she wished, drift around and allow her whims to guide her feet. But she had a plan… and that plan was Skyrim. Yes, it was a land full of strife, but it was still a place of great significance to her. It was her mother's homeland. When Elyse finds her life in Cyrodiil too painful to bare, she makes the decision to travel north, to Skyrim - unaware that she was Dragonborn, and that her decision would soon determine not just her own fate, but the fate of Skyrim... and potentially that of the world itself.

Tenacity (On Tumblr) - In Progress, prequel to both Seeking the Sun and The Perfect Storm

Skyrim fanfiction (based in 4E 172/173 - approximately 28/29 years pre-game)

Edwyn Verne (OC)/Ingja Frosthand (OC)

Chapters - {1} (currently only posted on Tumblr, not AO3)

Enemies to lovers, Forbidden romance, tragedy with a happy ending

"Stay away from those mages and their college. They are nothing but bad news." That message had been instilled in Ingja since she was but a child. So after a chance encounter leads to her getting to know Edwyn, an aspirational student of conjuration in the College, she realises that perhaps... mages simply aren't as bad as their reputation would say.

Tempest (on AO3) - In Progress

Skyrim fanfiction (based in the same version of Skyrim as The Perfect Storm, but is a standalone fic)

Thorne (OC)/Vilkas, past Thorne/Brynjolf

Rated M on AO3

Enemies to lovers, Found family, Secrets, Mental health issues, Companions questline, past Thieves Guild questline

The Thieves Guild were like the family which Thorne never had, though she never felt as though she truly fit in, even after reaching position of guildmaster. After a heart-to-heart with Brynjolf, she finds herself planning to amicably part ways with the guild and find somewhere that she could belong. Somewhere that she could feel happy. That somewhere ends up being Jorrvaskr much to the chagrin of Vilkas, who feels that she is hiding more than she is letting on.

With light comes shadow (On AO3) - In Progress

Oblivion fanfiction (featuring two heroes of Kvatch)

Martin Septim/Hero of Kvatch (Florian Livius - OC); uncertain if my other HoK, Drissa Arys (OC), will have a relationship established or not.

Rated M on AO3

Character Redemption/Condemnation, Oblivion Main Quest, Oblivion Dark Brotherhood, canon character death, Found family

At a pivotal time for the Empire, in the wake of the Emperor’s death, two so-called heroes emerge from the ashes of Kvatch - an incompetent thief and a disgraced arena fighter. One takes the chance at redemption. The other seeks their own ruin.

Oneshots

A Moment in the Sunset (On here and AO3)

Skyrim fanfiction

Balgruuf the Greater (Elyse Verne - OC)

Rated M on AO3

As the sun sets across Skyrim, the Dragonborn and Jarl of Whiterun spend a peaceful few moments on the porch of Dragonsreach.

"Do you surrender?" (On AO3)

Skyrim fanfiction

Balgruuf the Greater/Dragonborn (Elyse Verne - OC)

Rated E on AO3 (sexual content)

When business in Whiterun grows far too tedious for Balgruuf's liking, he takes a break to find his wife in order let off some steam. What starts out as a sparring session with Elyse on the Dragonsreach porch takes a heated turn.

Kiss (On here)

Skyrim fanfiction

Balgruuf the Greater/Dragonborn (Elyse Verne - OC)

To be part of a bigger oneshot in the future (or maybe added in to The Perfect Storm eventually :3)

Elyse and Balgruuf sneak out of Dragonsreach for a night in the Bannered Mare without telling anyone, not even their housecarls, and end up sharing a dessert. A very messy dessert.

Purity (On here and AO3)

Skyrim fanfiction

Vilkas/Dragonborn (Thea - OC)

Rated T on AO3

An odd, prickly feeling went down Vilkas' spine as he watched Thea navigate towards a wall, which upon further inspection, looked to have an indent about the size of a door. The sensation made him shiver, and he had to stretch his fingers with anticipation. Sweat was also pouring down the back of his neck, a looming sense of… not quite terror, but more along the lines that something was going to go awfully wrong if he were to go any further.

Starlit (On here)

Skyrim fanfiction

Miraak

Miraak looks up at the night sky after his long-awaited freedom from Apocrypha.

[vitanithepure]

Okay, it's Gale on my mind again, and this time after a chat I had with my partner, who finally finished his first run and now we can Talk®

Full-on Gale's story spoilers under the cut. Also a bit of Astarion in the very end, talking mainly about possible endings.

So, what are your thoughts about Gale claiming godhood?

Personally, I'm not that fond of the idea. Not in the way it's presented. I realize that if we choose to play as Gale his character and ambitions are up to us in a significant way, and that is the only way to currently see the ascention scene as it were. But let me focus more on what we are canonically given on him, as a companion.

My biggest gripe seems to be how it plays out. I am not a D&D guru, but what went down is hilarious. You expect me to believe that man would claim the ambition domain and straight up had a go at Mystra from the get-go? Like an absolute madman?

Yeah, I know, I hear you. "Power corrupts". But are we still talking about the same man at this point? The one that had absolutely zero grudge against Mystra even though nobody would hold it against him if he did?

Maybe I read his character wrong, because a romanced Gale, when encouraged to go after the Crown of Karsus, still - first and foremost - is about 'us', not 'me'. Verging on more maniacal, mind you, but still doesn't even mention going after Mystra. He just wants the power to live on his own rules, without gods deciding his fate for him.

Because, honestly, being dependant on a being so much more powerful and fickle sounds downright awful.

My partner said Gale deserved to become a god because he believes he would be the kinder one. Not in the way to "show Mystra how it's done" but rather "you are given power over my brand of Weave, use it to make the world better" kind fo deal.

But can the Karsite Weave be used that kind fo way? I think it's said that it 'hungers', that it feeds on Mystra's Weave. It's described as inherently 'bad', but I don't have the knowledge necessary to determine that.

Or, rather, I'm unsure if Mystra is an impartial source of information on it :D

Maybe I could buy into that, but in the end I don't see Gale either wanting or needing that. That was never his ambition. He wanted, and still wants, power, but for the sake of knowing how to do things. Not to hold said power and take advantage with it.

If I ever would imagine Gale as a god I would rather see another Azuth kind of being (he still around in 5e D&D?), a lesser god, sworn to Mystra but having his own thing going on. I think that *maybe* this is what he hoped to gain from Mystra?

And he doesn't need to be a god to be his adorable, 'show-offy' self. I kind of wish we got to see what happens to Gale the companion who went after the Crown of Karsus. He promises to come back, but would he really? Or would he just get killed by Mystra after his ascent like he does when we play as him?

All in all, I just don't like that ending for him, even if he would survive (which he doesn't so it makes the argument against it even sounder), it's kind of like the Vampire Ascendant for Astarion, you know? Astarion gets the power he wanted, gets the revenge but... doesn't become his best self.

And I believe becoming a god never feels like being your best self.

[nspwriteups]

Aarampam - Part 1

Been planning this collab with @whippersnappersbookworm for a long time..do read and review guys

It has been three months since Vanathi has left Kodumbalur . Three months have passed since she left her childhood home and moved to Pazhayari. Back in Kodumbalur, Vanathi was always the apple of everyone's eyes, since her mother had passed away, her father dedicated all his time in her upbringing. He took care of her all by himself, coddling her , and spoiling her with everything she wanted.But happiness was a temporary guest in Vanathi's life , her father died when she was just nine years old in the battle of Eezham , leaving his young daughter to deal with the cruel world on her own. That day changed everything for Vanathi, she transformed from a happy- go- lucky child to a quiet introvert girl who lacked confidence. Her uncle and aunt tried their best to make her comfortable and loved , but Vanathi refused to open up to anyone, she spent most of her time all alone in the gardens of Kodumbalur dreaming about the son she will have one day. She wholeheartedly believed that her father will come back to her in the form of her son, her son will solve every problem in her life, he will make her the happiest person in this world. 

Few months back her uncle finally put his foot down and decided to send her to Pazhayari so she can become friends with the Ilayi Priratti , who can groom her to become a better princess. Vanathi tried her best to convince her uncle , she tried everything from crying to giving up food but his uncle didn't budge from his decision . He had many big ambitions for her , and he believed that getting acquainted with ilavarasi is the very first step towards that path. So unfortunately teary-eyed Vanathi had to board the palanquin which took her to the Pazhayari palace , a place that later became the home she always craved for. 

She had heard of Ilaiya Piratti Kundavai Devi - the formidable, intelligent and gracious only daughter of the Emperor, the woman that the citizens claim is the real brain behind royal politics. What would she think of her? When she first came to Pazhaayari, she saw Sembiyan Madevi welcome her with an aarti while Kundavai watched from the side. 

"Welcome to Pazhaayari Kanne. I hope you will find your happiness here" Madevi said while placing a hand over her head. Out of the corner of her eyes, she saw some other women, who she guessed must be the companions of Ilaiya Piratti sneering at her and whispering among themselves and her heart sank. Happiness? She might as well drown in Ponni now than suffer all the teasing from them. Why did her uncle choose such a fate for her? What did he mean that this stay is going to change her life? As she watched Periya Piratti Madevi go inside, she also noticed Kundavai was still standing at her spot, scrutinising her with her dark eyes. 

"Kodumbalur Ilavarasi" she addressed her in a majestic tone "Would you like to join me in the gardens for a while?" 

Vanathi could only nod and silently followed the former into the spacious gardens accompanied by some of the other women.

As they reached the gardens, Kundavai suddenly turned around and asked, "Ilavarasi, I have heard you are a good singer. And it is evident you have a sweet voice. Could you sing a thevaram for us?" 

Vanathi was shocked at this request to say the least. But she quickly collected her wits and sang a thevaram that she liked by Thirugnana Sambander. She closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to look at the envious and taunting gaze of the other onlookers and immersed herself in singing the thevaram as best as she could, not to impress the Chola Ilaiya Piratti but because singing gave her a momentary relief from her overthinking. When she finished singing and opened her eyes, she saw Kundavai smiled openly at her. "You are truly blessed with a sweet voice, Kanne. May your voice echo in these palatial chambers for everyone to hear and be mesmerized" Vanathi's heart skipped a beat after hearing these words uttered by Kundavai and a beautiful smile was etched on her face. 

"Of course, she must be here to charm our dear Ponniyin Selvan" She suddenly heard one of Kundavai's companions remark in a half-whisper. "She's an orphan. It is clear she brings misfortune to all who surround her" The smile that was present a second ago disappeared and she felt tears pricking her eyes no matter how much she tried to blink it away. She didn't see Kundavai fix the speaker with a stern look. "If you knew any better, you would remember never to judge a book by its cover. If my Thambi gets impressed by her inherent qualities, can you judge her Sugatha?" Kundavai asked in a grave tone. The girl who taunted Vanathi looked ashamed. "Forgive me for my recklessness Iliya Piratti"

Kundavai sighed and turned to a surprised Vanathi "Ilavarasi, I would like to personally escort you to your chamber" and looking back at the girls she added "All of you can go to the temple and prepare for the evening Pooja. I'll join you presently" 

Vanathi followed the former into the palace " Thank you for standing up for me Ilaiya Piratti" She said softly, voice dripping with gratitude. Kundavai glanced at her in amusement. "You don't know Ilavarasi, I am always correcting their behaviour. These girls have a habit of making wayward comments about each other. Do you know who they are?" Vanathi shook her head.

"They are girls from other Samatha kingdoms and noble families, left in my care to transform them into eligible brides. I am adamant in giving them the education and training they need in life but for my Thambi's bride ...." She gave Vanathi a once-over "Perhaps I may not have to look any further now that you are here " 

Vanathi was shocked to say the least. Her as a potential bride for the Chola Kula Surya Manikkam? "Iliya Piratti, how can I ever be eligible for the brave and radiant Ponniyin Selvan, the heartthrob of every girl in Chozha Naadu?" 

Kundavai gave her a reassuring smile " I know the world sees you as timid and I also learnt from your uncle that you are prone to fainting spells. But I believe that every woman is an avatar of Adi Parashakti and I'll help you discover the courage that resides in you" Vanathi stared at the woman in front of her. This is why people say she is the brain of the royal family! An idea germinated in her mind - yes, she will become strong. She will become the Vanathi that Kundavai aspires to see and show the world her true self. She nodded in determination "Thank you Iliya Piratti"

Kundavai continued to smile at her "I don't have a sister. Could you be that for me? If yes then you can call me Akka from now, Vanathi" She said gently.

Vanathi was floating on cloud nine by now. She came here unwillingly to what she assumed was to be an apprentice under Kundavai Devi and now she became a part of the family in the same day. Maybe this journey was going to be life-changing for her as her uncle mentioned.

"Yes Akka" She said fondly looking at the woman she began to feel great admiration for.

Since that day Vanathi had ended up becoming Kundavai's shadow, she had won Illiya Piratti's heart with her innocence and simplicity. Kundavai's influence on the other hand has  also transformed the introverted Vanathi into a bright , cheerful girl. She took extra care to make sure her Uyir Thozhi is comfortable in Pazhayarai, she took Vanathi with her to the temples and the various functions she has to attend , gives her private lessons and tells her tales about his beloved thambi: Ponniyin Selvan.

Vanathi has been hearing this name since she was child , she had heard tales about his beauty , his intelligence, his benevolence . He is a jewel of the Chozha Nadu adored by everyone, he is every girl's heartthrob, but Vanathi couldn't be less interested. Even though Kundavai akka had repeatedly told her how she is perfect for her thambi and how he is perfect for her , Vanathi never felt overjoyed at the prospect of marriage with The Chola Ilavarasan. Unlike the other girls Vanathi never dreamed of getting married; her daydreams only had one man in it , her future son.  Although she he had recently learned from the gossip of the Anthapuram that a child is impossible without marriage ,but somehow she could never imagine being married to a prince and leading a life of a queen like Sembiyan Mahadevi or Vanavan Mahadevi , that life doesn't interest her. Rather she always wanted a simple life, a life filled with love and simpler joys . She wanted a husband who would make her laugh, share his life with her. Can a prince do that? Can Ponniyin Selvan ever understand that?

Vanathi didn't had the answer to it. 

Want to see AMV and Vanathi meet up? Stay tuned to the next part..

@ramcharanobsessed @dumdaradumdaradum @vibishalakshman @harinishivaa @hollogramhallucination @kovaipaavai@rang-lo. @willkatfanfromasia@thelekhikawrites@thegleamingmoon@deafeningflowercat@yehsahihai@whippersnappersbookworm@itsfookingloosah@gemsmusings@chiyaanvikram@elvenladysakura. @matka-kulfi. @madatdisney@bumblebeeskywalker@vahnithedreamer@nkarti@dosai-maavu@utterlynotperfect@winter-birds@happy-bookworm @tumbledout @anabanana4115 @freeunknownwasteland @bhataktiatmacore@rapunzels-stuff@celestesinsight@mairablue@rationalelderberry@existenceiswhateven@arachneofthoughts@spider5884fan11 @cara-2003 @nirmohi-premika @stella12 @thereader-radhika

[sugutoad]

matchup for @coffeebooksrain18

GREEK MYTHOLOGY MATCHUP

I ship you with Hecate — Goddess of Magic and Witchcraft. Hecate, known for her connection to the moon, Magic and the unseen, aligns in a similar manner with your introspective nature and your love for dark themes.. Both of you sometimes face misunderstandings due to your blunt honesty and RBF, and for Hecate, it is is often because of her much darker realm. But magic in truth is not harmful nor deadly, it is the person who wields the power that chooses to be such. Hecate would adore your honesty and your ability to get through any sort of tension to stand up for what you believe (she, herself, is a minor goddess so overlooked and she always has to stand up for her own self, and your presence and confidence only helps more). Hecate is known for many things, but above all else, she is fierce in her loyalty to Hades. She would cherish you so deeply, giving everything and laying it at your feet. Hecate's more soothing aura would temper your fire, navigating you through bouts of anger with the grace you would need. The both of you are cunning and intelligent, and never backing down from anything (can you imagine the bicker?). Hecate is often linked to animals, particularly dogs, which resonates in a way with your love for animals (Willow!) You, like her, are cunning and independent—which align with Hecate’s nature. And as a little bonus, your fascination with dragons, mythical creatures, and darker themes would fit so well with Hecate’s realm of magic and the supernatural.

HEADCANON

To clarify in this world, you are the youngest of Leto’s children. Your elder siblings couldn’t be much different, yet they were still twins. It was always them together (you found yourself a mix of them). And although you were your Mother’s favorite, it was lonely to grow up without someone who would always be with you as a companion. Leto quickly took notice of it and introduce you to Hecate. Although older than you, you found it easy to be around with her. You first met her underneath a Willow tree, when she poked her head from the leaves, scaring you. But she laughed and quickly you began to laugh too. She understood you better than any of your siblings and she challenged you to be this better person. Hecate was supposed to be a sister to you… but alas, the fates were having quite a giggle to themselves as they weaves your strings. When she had to leave for the underworld, she were persistent that she could be a Goddess here instead. Here with you. As a parting gift, she presented you with a dog (who you would later name Willow, afterall you did meet Hecate underneath a Willow tree).

Although each myth differs, the most consistent one is this story of yours and Hecate. Although many people may assume the northern auroras were created by Selene or Artemis, it was in fact Hecate. The day she declared her love for you and took you in her arms, she used magic to illuminate the night sky in colors of purple and green, knowing that those were your favorite colors. She later took you to the underworld in a chariot of diamond, guided by two horses. Each horse was a deep black, covered in the shadows in truth, but its skin was slightly translucent, allowing you to see gleaming white bones.

Both you and Hecate are quiet individuals and this actually allows both of you to stay in each other’s comfort zone at times (unless Hecate is having one of her mood swings, she will probably push you to your limits at times). But can you imagine it? The room softly illuminated a dim glow as the fire crackles near you (although a cold chill still brushes against your skin at times). Hecate is half-dozed off, her gaze so soft while looking at you as you are in her arms. CAN YOU IMAGINE?

Ship Tropes

wonders why everyone is scared of them (You) x the scary shadow (Hecate)

Not sunshine nor moonlight, but an eclipse

lalala x okokok (alters all the time)

Ship Songs

E.T by Katy Perry

Say Yes to Heaven by Lana De Ray

GODDES OF… WHAT?

You are the Goddess of Introspection and Truth, you personified the ability to guide others on their journeys of self-discovery, showing the paths meant and hidden for people. Your power is simply hidden in your brutal honesty and deep emotional insight, helping those who seek your counsel to confront their vulnerabilities (something that tends to me an humans biggest fear at times) and truly embrace themselves. You serve as a beacon of clarity, revealing hidden truths, fostering emotional growth and to help encourage others to navigate their feelings with courage and understanding. Your connection to nature and its creatures only acts a bonus, as you understand the unspoken words an animal may carry, while offering them companionship and solace. You are often symbolized by a mirror that reflects the soul and with a soft illuminating light around it to show the haven you create for others.

COMPANION

Athena has her owl, Hermes has snakes, but you? Who do you have to represent you and be with you as a companion? Your animal symbol is the Raven. Ravens are often associated darker themes such as death, but they also symbolize wisdom, insight, and transformation, representing both the light and darkness that you navigate others on. Like you, Ravens are known for their intelligence and ability to see beyond the surface, which perfectly aligns with you.

[bingsoo-jung]

This or That

I was tagged by @writinglittlebeasts if anyone else wishes to do this, please just do it. I grant you permission to tag me saying I tagged you okay?​

I am also incredibly opinionated and this is about to show.

|| HISTORICAL or FUTURISTIC ||

So while I almost exclusively write historically set fantasy, I’m actually far more of a scifi girlie! I just... struggle to write it. But I tend to enjoy scifi set in the future a bit more and find the tropes easier to understand. I just tend to get caught up in the granularity of writing it and the science of it. This is very likely because I study astrophysics and math.

|| OPENING or CLOSING CHAPTER ||

While I love closing chapters from other people. I’m better at writing openings. What can I say, I’m a ‘make a fucking splash’ person.

|| LIGHT+FLUFFY or DARK+GRITTY ||

I love fluff. I read so much fluff. I, however, write fucked up little dudes in fucked up little worlds. I also think that keeping your eyes to purely hopeful things can limit the stories you want to tell. While the same can be said for dark and gritty, let’s be honest, no anti-colonial story is ever told with a purely light and fluffy setting. The premise of addressing such violence predicates darker themes. And I really enjoy telling colonizers to fucking shove it.

|| ANIMAL COMPANION or FOUND FAMILY ||

While I can intellectually appreciate a good animal companion. I’m going to be so real with you, I don’t care enough about animals for that. I was never into cats or dogs as a kid, never wanted to be an animal. I like being human so much. On top of which, I think found family is so sweet. While I tend to keep more to ‘actual family’ rather than found family in my writing, I like the idea of making your own fate and comfort and friends, and of binding yourself to people out of choice and dedication and blood. So found family all the fucking way.

|| HORROR or ROMANCE ||

I don’t write horror or romance. But I think there is something shocking and beautiful in the macabre of twisted delights as we fall together and apart and back together again. Also most romance is just written so badly that I think I have to choose horror for this.

|| HARD MAGIC SYSTEM or SOFT MAGIC SYSTEM ||

So legally I should say hard for this, since, once more, local science bitch here. But in reality, soft magic systems I think allow for magic to be more of a mechanic of the plot and relationships than something that must be defined for “plot purposes.” As long as a soft magic system maintains its internal logic system I will often prefer it to a hard magic system. I also think a lot of hard magic systems end up being weirdly sexist (@brandonsanderson you mfer.)

|| STANDALONE or SERIES ||

I love love series. But I think people’ve lost sight of what a good standalone can mean. I also think a lot of people are being pushed into writing series because publishers want money more than they want quality.

|| ONE PROJECT AT A TIME or ALWAYS JUGGLING 2+ ||

I used to be always juggling, but I like having one thing to focus on and spiral about. It also means I’m going crazy over one story, but that’s fine.

|| ONE AWARD WINNER or ONE BESTSELLER ||

Bestseller statuses are meaningless. You know what’s not? A Ignyte or Hugo or Nebula. I like having shiny statues that let you know I was very good at a very specific thing.

|| FANTASY OR SCI-FI ||

See this goes back to the original thing. I am a scientist, most of the media I consume by myself is science fiction. While I do play ttrpgs and almost only play them in fantasy settings, and only write fantasy, this is because I can’t convince other people to play science fiction games with me. I almost only watch scifi shows and listen to scifi podcasts. While I tend to read more fantasy this is because of a lack of good modern scifi in my opinion. Science fiction is at it’s best when there is research behind it, when people bother to realise that the universe is near infinite and thus there are near infinite possibilities for different existences out there.

Magic to me, while beautiful, is something of fairy tales and unrealities in a way we use to discuss the past. Fantasy is how we discuss what was and unpack the yesteryears of existence. The past, no matter how we memorialize what was and what we lost, will always have been imperfect. That’s an unfortunate reality. I write Asian fantasy, and even though I celebrate what was good and what was lost, the deal is that was lost, and we can never truly regain it. And for all the things that were beautiful, there were a hundred more things that weren’t. Like while queerness was more acceptable in Siam and Ayutthaya, it wasn’t perfect. There was still sexism and structural homophobia, and no wishing for what was will change that. But the future is what we make of it, and thus science fiction is how we set down the roads to dream of those better and more perfect futures. I want to make a better world and I think we do that through dreaming a better one.

|| CHARACTER DESCRIPTION or SETTING DESCRIPTION ||

I appreciate a good character description, but I think people tend to focus too much on the reality of what someone looks like rather than the impression it leaves. I also just enjoy writing the setting more. I don’t think character description is always necessary. But knowing where you are and the ways in which location fill characters with sensation are just more fun.

|| FIRST DRAFT or FINAL DRAFT ||

I WANT TO BE DONE. I WANT TO BREAK FREE.

|| LOVE TRIANGLE IN EVERYTHING or NO ROMANTIC ARCS ||

Am I currently trying to solve love triangles with polyamory? Yes. Do I think people need to stop acting like romance is the end all be fucking all of stories and existence and that love comes in more forms than romantic overtures? Yes. Draw back on the romance folks. Sometimes a good plot with solid friendships is better than two people kissing. 

|| CONSTANT SANDSTORM or RAINSTORM ||

I hate both of these. But I hate sand more than I hate water. I am a SEAsian from SoCal. I need humidity to live.

[litcityblues]

Doctor Whoquest Part Twelve: Our Smithels Now Have Ended

I think there are a number of key ingredients that give Matt Smith a real shot at taking the top spot of Nu-Who Doctors. The writing, the music, and the acting all just click perfectly, and while I think it takes every Doctor a series or two to really dig into the role and reach the peak of their powers, as it were, Matt Smith brought a different kind of energy to the role and with this, his final series, he went out at the absolute top of his game. If there is a Doctor who thrives at capturing big, epic, myth-making moments for this franchise and absolutely owning them, it's this one and he had some absolutely top-notch material to work with for his final season.

I don't know if Russell T. Davies has big plans for the franchise as he takes the reins again, but he didn't seem opposed to spin-off shows to grow the universe a bit so I have to put in a plug: The Paternoster Gang is just sitting there. It's perfect. It practically writes itself. You could even tie it back into the origins of the Torchwood Institute, as that came out of a Series 2 Episode with Queen Victoria. There's just so much potential there. All we need is for someone to actually make the thing happen. (Hell, you could even do a 'limited series' thing if you didn't want to commit to a full show.) But seeing more of The Paternoster Gang is a hill I will always die on!

I have yet to see the 60th Anniversary Specials-- but I have a good feeling about them based on both The Centenary Special (Jodie Whittaker) and the 50th Anniversary Special in this series, which was as close to perfect as you could possibly ask for. Tentative Verdict: Nu-Who is good at big specials.

This season is, once again, split into two parts-- with Amy and Rory taking their final bow as companions after the end of the 5th Episode and then Clara Oswald showing up to take over as the main companion in the back half of the season. I loved the way they introduced Clara- setting up a mystery that the Doctor is preoccupied with for most of the back half of the season. If you didn't know Clara was coming on as a companion watching this, her first appearance (as Oswin in 'Asylum of the Daleks') pays off beautifully by the end of the season.

Three Episodes I Liked

'The Name of the Doctor'/'The Day of The Doctor'/'The Time of the Doctor': You could do these separately or all together so I view them more as a trilogy of episodes that separate ones and for a Doctor who thrives in big, epic moments, these are the perfect end to Matt Smith's run. From the moment in 'The Name of The Doctor' when Clara goes into his timeline to rescue him from The Great Intelligence and pays off something that's been building the entire season, to the revelation of a previously unknown Doctor (John Hurt) and what he did during the Time War ('The Day Of The Doctor') and having three Doctors on screen at once! To finally, finally, the 11th Doctor meets his fate at Trenzalore where the crack in the wall and the Silence and every strand of 11's mythology that's been built over the past three seasons gets tied up neatly into the perfect bow. Smith's final bow was perfect. The lightning-fast change into Capaldi followed by the 'I've got new kidneys. I don't like the color'-- you can't ask for a better way to hand off to the next Doctor and what an epic end. Just about perfect.

2. 'The Power of Three': This underrated episode because it explores something from the Companion's point of view that doesn't really get touched on: when do you choose between 'The Doctor Life' and 'Regular Life'-- I also liked the fact that there was a year-long arc to this episode that they called 'The Slow Invasion' and that it also forced The Doctor to kind of see what 'regular life' was like for his friends. Ultimately, at the urging of Rory's Dad, they stay as full-time Companions.

3. 'Hide': A haunting is never just a haunting in Doctor Who and this one was especially creepy the twist at the end is nice and finding out the Doctor's true motives for the visit to the haunted mansion was also a nice twist. (Plus, it sets up the concept of a pocket universe for important developments later on in the season.)

Two Episodes I Didn't Like

'A Town Called Mercy': While I appreciate that the Old West isn't the usual setting you see in Doctor Who, this episode was largely just okay for me.

2. 'Journey To The Center of the TARDIS': I'm of two minds about this episode as well. On the one hand, interesting plot point. On the other hand, did we just construct an episode to have the Doctor confront Clara about her past lives and his connection to him and then for it not to matter in the slightest because everyone's memory gets re-written? Seems like a waste of an episode to me, but it wasn't bad either.

One Episode To Consider

'Dinosaurs On A Spaceship': Much like Snakes On A Plane, the title pretty much encapsulates the entire episode. There's a spaceship and there are dinosaurs on it-- seems like it should be silly, but in fact, it turns out to be fun, kind of weird, and a little bit awesome all at the same time.

Overall: Hey, do you all remember when I pointed out that Amy had her baby stolen and should have been way more traumatized than she appeared to be by the end of the previous Smith Season? We open the season 'The Asylum of the Daleks' with Amy and Rory on the verge of divorce! We find out why, of course, when Amy reveals that because of what happened to her at Demon's Run, she can't have more children, so she can't give Rory the kids that he wants. In the end, they decide that they love each other more than that and fix themselves a bit, but I'd like my previous complaint to be stricken from the record, your honor. They doubled back and talked about it! I like that.

Where does Smith fit into the Nu-Who pantheon? Before I wrapped up Capaldi, I think he might have been my favorite but now... I think Capaldi might still be my top choice, but Smith is just behind him and Whittaker might be just behind them-- ranking these Doctors is so weird when you think about it because there are aspects of all of them that I've liked so far and aspects that aren't so good. You can appreciate the Whittaker Run for taking big swings, even if they wound up being glorious trainwrecks while acknowledging that the writing wasn't as good as it could have been for some of it. You can appreciate the Capaldi run for any number of things, but point out weak points here and there as well. I loved Smith in the role. He has the best first episode of any Doctor in Nu-Who and his final three episodes provide the perfect bookend. Whether it's the writing, the acting, or just pure happenstance, this run thrived on big, epic, mythmaking moments and turbocharged the franchise in many ways, making it bigger, more cinematic, and generally proving itself well adept to handle, big, epic moments. It's a contribution that can't be understated to the continued success of Nu-Who.

My Grade: 9/10

[wraith-caller]

rb prevs tags ON THE POST bc i am in love #elden ring#agree with prev about the duskborn ending dealing with godwyn already bc the thing about that is#from what i can tell#that ppl rlly rlly want godwyn as like their cool hot guy to blorbify & the duskborn arc is ultimately about fia & her story#& the state of the world in general but specifically the world as filtered through fia's ideologies and experiences and beliefs#which to me is better than any hypothetical godwyn focused questline but u know that the ppl who want godwyn to be core in the narrative#are not satisfied by fia being that instead#and are not satisfied by fia being like the actor with agency that moves the duskborn arc (i.e. the fate of deathblight and godwyn) along#for relatively obvious reasons i feel like#and it is a little frustrating bc like fia's story is genuinely more interesting than anything they could do with a resurrecting godwyn arc#(and that's without even getting into how significant godwyn's death is for characters like marika and miquella)#but the way ppl talk its like she doesn't even exist in the game lol

it's so accurate!! the duskborn arc is not truly about godwyn so much as it is about fia. it seems pretty important to me that the devs chose to have godwyn essentially nonresponsive throughout this entire quest, that he continues to *haunt* the narrative rather than truly participate in this ending that so many insist is *his* ending when it isn't. that lack of participation and response from godwyn is especially relevant with the duskborn quest BECAUSE the story is fia's story and her arc is ALL ABOUT her reclaiming her own autonomy. she came from a place of being conditioned into a role she never chose for herself, to offer those services to a noble she never chose for herself, and her reward was to be kicked out by the people who did this to her because she was given grace, which, once more, she never chose for herself.

godwyn is her way of defying ALL of these people who have put their chains on her. not only does she get to remake her role as a deathbed companion into one she acts in of her own volition by choosing a noble for herself, the noble she chooses is the beloved and now accursed son of the woman whose grace condemned fia to be exiled from her own homeland to begin with. i think fia pities and cares for godwyn, but it's also so relevant that the mending rune fia makes out of him is placed on marika's womb. i'm of two minds about it - is fia saying, from one would-be mother to another, that i mourn for your son and understand your grief for him, and have done what i could to allay that for both of you, to return that lost, beloved son to you? or is she rather saying, i have done what you couldn't in your blind grief and cold disdain for your own corrupt children? i have been the mother to the cursed ones you rejected and denied, whose curses you made possible through your own mistakes? because fia definitely has some resentments of the golden order, it seems very easy to read her as resenting marika as well given that the order *is* marika's work, so wouldn't her perspective be colored by that anger? idk. i love fia's story and get so excited when i see people remembering there has always been more to her than hugs and being Very Nice to the undead.

The way you described artists designing Godwyn to be a boring conventionally attractive man with zero signs of being transmogrified into an Eldritch horror is so funny because that’s exactly what Fromsoft did with Radahn. Despite him apparently going through this harrowing process of being reincarnated into Mohg’s body he just ended up looking like Medieval G.I. Joe 😭 (this is no hate by the way I think both are stupid)

Would it be weird if I said I expected someone to say this lol 😭

While I do understand wanting Radahn to be more grotesque (and I think it would've gone farther to sell Ansbach's words about Mohg being done such a huge disservice being used in this way), I can at least understand why Radahn *isn't* a horror show. He's being remade by Miquella who has passed into godhood. Not much is told to us about this process, so FS is not exactly*undoing* anything by not making Radahn more hideous. They're maybe missing an opportunity, in some of our opinions, but it could also be seen as symbolic of Miquella's compassion being somewhat surface level and shallow - that beneath these noble ideals, there is suffering, betrayal, and cruelty.

Meanwhile, the problem with hot blond Godwyn consort is that it actively denies the base game's lore about him. Miquella has tried twice to fix his horrific fate, with the eclipse and the golden epitaph's prayer to just die already!! But the problem is, Godwyn simply can't die, and he can't be reborn. This is a result of how Marika designed reality, and it's super tragic because she made it this way to (likely) protect those she loved only to unwittingly make it possible to condemn Godwyn to this disturbing and miserable existence. Miquella cannot just wave his hand and fix that, and he's tried very hard.

So when some people come along and condescendingly decide FS has just butchered its own lore by not having Godwyn come back as a pure and golden beacon of conventionally attractive hope is just showing a serious misunderstanding of what is going on with Godwyn to begin with. If Godwyn is trapped in this hideous stasis because of the way reality is currently designed, Miquella can do nothing to help him until he's ascended and can rewrite those rules in some new way, same as our own Tarnished who can change things when we become Marika's lord.

That's my understanding, at least!

[live-the-fangirl-life]

To the Ends of the Earth

A World Away Companion Piece

Aelin Galathynius x Rowan Whitethorn - World Travelers AU

Aelin and Rowan decide on their next adventure. Be it fate or bad aim, it’ll be somewhere neither have ever been before.

*you don’t have to have read AWA to understand this fic but doing so gives a better understanding

Written for Rowaelin Month 2022 Day 3: Travel/Vacation

Masterlist | Fic Masterlist | Rowaelin Month | Read on Ao3

Warnings: Language

2048 words

*******

An easy breeze rolled in with the waves and brought a smile to Aelin’s face as it cooled her water-speckled skin. From their perch in the hammock Rowan hung up between two small palm trees, they had a beautiful, unobstructed view of the wavering tide and slowly setting sun.

Rowan was laid on his back, one hand behind his head and one running fingers through her hair where she’d taken up residence atop him. His leg hung over the side and dug into the sand as he slowly rocked them back and forth.

“We check out the day after tomorrow,” Rowan broke the comfortable silence, and Aelin lifted her head, resting her chin on her hand sprawled across his chest to look at him. “Any thoughts on what’s next on our list?”

She hummed. “If you’re talking about what our next destination should be, may I remind you that we have plans to be in Vanuatu by the end of the week? It worries me that you can’t remember; you booked the meetings and yet here you are, only days before, obliviously forgetful. Ah, the perils of old age, Buzzard—” she laughed as he poked her side with a grunt.

“Truly hilarious,” he deadpanned with an eye roll. “You should have your own stand-up special.”

“I would sell out arenas,” she agreed but paused and corrected, “Theaters? Music-halls? I don’t know, where do comedians usually perform?”

“Not in a hammock in Fiji.”

Aelin scoffed, but it quickly dissolved into laughter which Rowan echoed.

“I meant where do you want to go after, smartass,” he didn’t put any bite in the word. “We just talked about Vanuatu this morning. I figured it was a given I meant beyond that, but, apparently, you have less faith in me than I thought.”

Smirking, Aelin sat up, her shifting weight urging Rowan to do the same so they didn’t tip over. “Careful, your feathers are ruffling.”

“You and the buzzard jokes, I swear…” he grumbled and dragged a hand down his face so she couldn’t see the smile tugging at his lips. He was wildly unsuccessful.

“Okay, okay,” Aelin laughed and started throwing out suggestions. “Madagascar? We can walk under the baobab trees and feel like we’re two feet tall. You can try getting a shot of a lemur to add to your wildlife collection!”

“That’s definitely on the to-do list,” he agreed. “But what about someplace closer? How about Perth? We didn’t get to Western Australia when we were there. Take a drive, go see some of the pink salt lakes?”

Aelin nodded, her brain whirling as she looked at her mental map. “Ooh! What about New Caledonia? I’ve heard the whale watching there is phenomenal this time of year, all the humpbacks coming in towards the lagoons.”

“We still need to—”

Aelin sat bolt upright, eyes flying wide and smiling broad enough to make her cheeks ache. “I have an idea!”

Rowan arched a skeptical brow at her sudden declaration but couldn’t stop the upward tug of his lips at her pure giddiness. “What kind of idea?”

“The kind that will solve our dilemma for us.”

***

They had to pry the generic water-themed painting off of the wall of their hotel room, but the pain in the ass it was going to be to rehang it would be worth it.

“What happens if it lands in the ocean?” Rowan stood next to Aelin as they both faced the wall.

It being the small dart she was twisting around in her hand, trying to get a feel for its weight.

She eyed the map they had pinned to the now-vacant wall. It wasn’t anything special and still had all the creases from being folded up and stuffed in a stand at a small tourist shop, but it would do.

“We choose the closest island?” she suggested, shrugging. “Take a cruise? Do some really intensive snorkeling?”

Aelin huffed a small laugh, not having to look at her husband to know he was rolling his eyes. She lifted the dart they’d snagged from some bar in Queens and practiced her throw. She almost let it fly but stopped herself at the last second. “What if it lands someplace we’ve already been?”

Rowan crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. “Guess it’ll depend on where you hit – see if we want to go back. If not, then I’ll take a throw.”

“Yeah, okay,” Aelin nodded, feeling satisfied with that, and turned back to the map.

She readied her shot again, narrowing her eyes, and biting her lip in concentration. But it was too hard to keep a straight face; she dropped her hand and whirled back to Rowan with a widening grin. Her voice bubbled with excitement as she gushed, “This is so fun!”

The sigh he loosed was equal parts fondness and exasperation. “It will be once you throw.”

Rolling her eyes, she huffed, “Don’t rush me.” But didn’t fight her grin as she again aimed at the map.

It was fun. They were beyond lucky to have the world at their fingertips; so many options open to them that they couldn’t choose just one. Ultimately, they didn’t have to choose, they both knew they would be exploring as many places as they physically could. But whether they went somewhere next week or next year or in the next decade, well, with that they could have a little fun.

Aelin had never been as happy as she’d been since meeting Rowan, since choosing each other and all that came with it. So many adventures led, so many places and sights seen, so many foods tried, and people met. So many passport stamps.

And now they were simply leaving it up to chance...or fate…or Aelin’s wonky aim to choose their next adventure.

She released the dart and watched as it embedded itself in the map.

The soft thud of the metal tip hitting the wall was the only sound in the room for several seconds. Rowan’s arms fell slack at his sides, and she chanced a glance towards him to see his mouth open and close as he stared at the pierced spot on the map. Her own eyebrows were nearly at her hairline as they stood in the growing silence.

“Huh.” She finally broke the tension, trying to keep her voice light. “Well…that’s…definitely somewhere we’ve never been before.”

Rowan made a choking noise, halfway between an incredulous laugh and a suppressed groan. “When you do something, you don’t go halfway, do ya?”

She huffed a laugh. “Have you met me?”

He leveled her a flat look but she rushed on before he could interject

“Hear me out—” she wasn’t entirely sure where she was going with this or if she even wanted to argue the point, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little intrigued by their turn of events. “How many people can say they’ve been to Antarctica?”

“The insane ones.”

Aelin rolled her eyes and folded her arms over her chest. “Really? So all the scientists and expeditioners are insane?”

“Are we scientists?” He argued.

“No.” she arched a brow. “But one could argue that—”

“Aelin. Fireheart.” He stepped towards her and held her face in his hands as he leaned in close. “Thorn in my side, and love of my life. We,” he gestured between them, “are not equipped for that. A real, true Artic expedition is a bit ambitious, even for us.”

“Antarctic,” she corrected, breezing passed his trepidations and choosing to ignore the thorn comment altogether. “Come on, Ro, don’t tell me you’ve never thought about it.”

“Of course, I’ve thought about it,” he huffed. “It’s one of those passing things like, Huh, wouldn’t it be amazing to go to Antarctica? or Wow, I wonder what that would be like? And then I move on with my day because I rather like having ten toes, thank you very much.”

She felt a grin on her lips but held it back, feeling like she could crack him on this. Antarctica? Wasn’t on her radar, not even a place she thought, truly, about visiting. The idea of going had never actually felt plausible, and it was perhaps the one place in the world that she wouldn’t have been upset about missing.

But…

“Imagine the kind of story Coast to Cadre could get? The publicity? The opportunity? And, please, think about how incredible it would feel knowing you’ve stepped foot on all seven continents?”

Carding a hand through his hair, Rowan stared over her shoulder towards the middle distance, and Aelin could tell the gears in his brain were turning.

“Aelin.”

“Rowan.”

“You really, seriously, want to go?” Rowan asked before she reached up to grab his hand. He pulled his gaze back to hers and laced their fingers together, his thumb rubbing small circles on her skin. His voice sounded skeptical, but his eyes held a different story — one that told her this crazy idea was settling, and as the shock wore off, he was beginning to actually wonder about it.

She paused for a moment as her eyes were drawn back to the map. Squeezing his hand, Aelin found his questioning stare again and grinned. “Yeah. I think I really do.”

He searched her face for any sign of teasing but found none. Finally, Rowan loosed a long, slow breath and barked out a short chuckle. “This is insane.”

“You’ve already said that.” Aelin’s grin softened as it spread, and she stepped closer into him, unlacing their hands so she could wrap her arms around his neck as his landed on her waist. “Besides, I think we could use a little insanity.”

Rowan arched a brow. “Really?”

“Yes,” she insisted. “Our last three stops had us either in meetings or on a beach all day.”

“I didn’t hear you complaining about it,” he argued, hands flexing and pulling her even closer as he ducked his head towards her neck and began peppering soft kisses on her skin.

“Of course, I’m not complaining,” she said a tad breathlessly. “I just think that, maybe, trying something out of our comfort zones would be a good idea.”

He pulled back, smirking at her flushed skin, and snorted, “I’d say this is far, far outside our comfort zones.” He laughed again, “Are we actually talking about this? Are we really considering a trip to the south pole?”

Jerking her head towards the map, they both stared at the dart. She could almost picture an imaginary string connecting the toy to the large, white continent, pulled taught by the fates themselves.

“Technically, it landed near the coast. But might as well go big or go home, right? The south pole it is.” They’d see how that actually worked out.

“It’ll take a lot of planning,” Rowan pointed out, still unable to look away from their upcoming adventure.

She nodded. “And time.”

“And mountains of logistical nightmares.” Rowan huffed a laugh making Aelin glance up at him. “I thought the whole point of this,” he waved a hand at the offending map, “was to decide our next trip? This isn’t something we can pull off with a week’s worth of planning.”

It was true. Unfortunately. Shoulders slumping, Aelin released a defeated sigh as reality crept back in. “You’re right.”

“So,” Rowan carefully unwound her arms from his neck and walked towards the map, plucking the dart from the blustering tundra before returning to her side. “How about I throw for our actual next destination, after Vanuatu,” he flashed her a wink, “and we take our time planning out this Antarctic adventure?”

Aelin beamed and couldn’t help her elated laugh as she jumped up and wrapped her arms around him once more. She pulled him down eagerly until she was kissing him, pouring all her anticipation, excitement, and joy into it.

“We wanted to see the world – what better way than going to the end of it?”

It was going to be one hell of an adventure, but there wasn’t anyone else with whom she’d rather try it.

“With you?” Rowan cupped her cheek, lifting her jaw just enough to connect his lips with hers again in a kiss that dissolved into matching grins. “I’d go anywhere.”

*****

Taglist:

@acourtofsnakes @allthebooksunderthemoon @astra-ad-mare @becarefuloflove @booklover41802 @charlizeed @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks @danibutterr @doubt-less @emily-gsh @enormousbooklover @foughtconquered @fromthelibraryofemilyj @hakunamatatazz @i-have-but-one-brain-cell @in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jorjy-jo @lemonade-coolattas @mariamuses @mayhemories @midsizewitch @rowaelinrambling @morganofthewildfire @nerdperson524 @rowaelinismyotp @rowansfirebringer @sayosdreams @sheharahu @sleeping-and-books @stardelia @story-scribbler @superspiritfestival @themoonthestarsthesuriel @swankii-art-teacher @tomtenadia @westofmoon @whimsicallyreading @moodymelanist @realbookloverproblems @gracie-rosee @julemmaes @yesdreamblog @the-regal-warrior @rowanaelinn @thestoriesyoutell @autumnbabylon @sunflowermoonshinewrites @maastrash @annejulianneh111 @the-lonelybarricade @rowaelinscourt

[spiltscribbles]

57. “Wait a second.. are you jealous?” + Poorly Timed Confession + modern au 😍 pretty please!!!

~Notes: OMFG angel!!! Thank you SO SO much for the prompt<3 You are a complete babe! I hope you like :S It’s cheese, but like also what else would I do? LMFAO XD

.-

Smash Prompt Game  |  Send Me A Prompt💜 |  A Reblog Is Like An I Love You!!

.-

“Hmmm… All right, would you rather, mmm… Smell Borris Johnson’s sweaty gym socks, or snog Professor Slughorn full on the mouth for a straight minute— oh erm, not so straight I reckon on second thought.”

Remus wrinkles his nose at him from across the bed, and clucks his tongue at the awful pun. “You’re unruly.”

“And you’re dodging,”

“Am not arse, I’m just recovering from that very terrifying scenario you’ve spewed out like the sadistic satanist you are.”

“Which scenario are you recovering from though?” Sirius leers, wiggling his eyebrows and jostling Remus’s textbook with his foot.

“I hate that you’re enjoying this so much,” Remus intones in a deadpan.

“Mary John, I’m waiting,” Sirius says with far too much glee.

Sometimes Remus is sure that he hates him. “Fine, the answer is I hate you.”

“Filthy and slanderous lies, Lupin.”

“You’re demented.”

“Five. Four. Three—“

“I won’t choose.”

“See,  all I hear is that you wanna get it on with our chemistry professor, you saucy minx, you.”

Remus sniffs. “Better than touching that prick with even a ten foot pole.”

“Mmmm, have I ever told you how hot and heavy I get hearing you talk politics at me?”

Remus throws him the bird, which makes Sirius laugh. Remus can objectively say that Sirius has the most beautiful variations of laughter in the world, and he’d know considering he’s catalogued each one. This version is definitely top three. His care free, effortless laugh when Remus takes him off guard with a snide remark or lowly muttered retort that’s not appropriate for most company— It’s really more of a experience, truly. His breaths stutter out in a lovely staccato, and his eyes glimmer like the sea, and sometimes it feels like the world’s been suspended and it’s only the two of them in that slice of eternity.

Erm, Ah, but yeah…. That only happens occasionally, and it’s only because Sirius is Remus’s greatest friend— has been since the final year of primary school after Remus had moved to the London outskirts from his small, coastal town in Wales, and on first sight, Sirius swung a snowball straight to Remus’s face, which he of course responded to by throwing two more his way, and well… The pair of them were soaking and breathless by the end of it, but their fate was sealed, they were the greatest of friends, and nothing would ever alter that unquestionable staple.

So what if sometimes Remus’s chest thuds painfully when Sirius dimples his way, or Remus only ever wants to talk to him over anyone else— even Lily or his Mam— if he’s had a bad day, or good one, or if something remarkable had happened, or , or… Or whenever really. And there’s absolutely no significance that Remus can’t help the totally delighted grin that splits his face in half whenever he gets a text or snap from Sirius.

None of that is at all relevant.

Sirius is Remus’s greatest friend, and he’d never risk ruining that by allowing some pesky little crush swallow him whole and clammer out his mouth— vulnerable and throbbing in the open space between them. It doesn’t matter if Marlene always makes kissy faces their way, or how James only ever refers to them as a couple, and so what if Peter’s got a pole running that Remus knows basically the whole school is betting on. 

They’re all wrong, Sirius would never, ever feel the same sort of way that Remus does him, that’s downright preposterous and ridiculous and just simply impossible. And Remus’s perfectly content with that very real truth… He is.

Remus is fine with it God help him. So everyone else just needs to but the fuck out of their business.

Besides, this, this right now— Him and Sirius splayed out on opposite ends of Remus’s bed, with Sirius’s feet nudging at Remus’s elbow whenever he’s got a question about there homework, with the window cracked open just so, letting in some of the chilly winter air because Sirius absolutely can not focus if he’s not cold— the fucking furnace— Where Remus can still hear the going ons of his family playing out on the floor below them… This is the most perfect place in Remus’s eyes, and he won’t ever change that, especially not to live out some boyhood fantasy that would never come into fruition in his wildest of dreams.

Remus’s content… He is… He has to be or else he’d lose one of the most vital people in his world.

.-

“You’ve got footie practice after school, right?”

“Mmhmm, you coming to watch?”

“Only if you admit i’m your good luck charm,” Remus sardonically bats his lashes at Sirius as if he was in a mascara advert, and the taller boy  blows a raspberry right back at him.

“Nice, real nice. You’re extraordinarily mature, you know that, Black?”

“And sexy, don’t forget that, oh so important descriptor Lupin.”

Remus leans against the locker besides Sirius’s, watches as he trades his current binders for the lot he’ll need for the afternoon, and tries really hard not to stare too longingly at how Sirius’s arm muscles ripple beneath their school’s  maroon, uniform jackets  in the most delicious of ways. (He hates the fact he’s been dissolved into a starry eyed mess lusting over the star striker, but thus is his fate.)

“I’d never commit such a faux pas, and I’m insulted that you’d ever think as much.”

Sirius sneers at him with a slight shake to his head. “So you coming or not?”

“I’m still contemplating my options,” he preens, but before Sirius could retort, Marlene, megawatt smile and dangerously sharp  smirk— swaggers over towards them.

“Good morning my two beautiful chums!”

“What do you want?” Sirius asks before even glancing her way, to which Marlene blinks up at him, faux owlish. “S, I just wanted to greet a couple of my closest companions this lovely December morning,” she defends herself.

“Marls, you’re never this agreeable before noon,” Remus points out hesitantly.

“ And you rarely are even afterwards,” Sirius tacks on.

“Rude,” she pouts.

“Accurate,” Remus pipes in with an apologetic grimace.

Marlene stares them both down for a solid minute before finally relaxing her shoulders, and thrusting out the legal pad in her grasp. “The student council and spirit society are selling corsages for the snowflake formal, and Dorcas has deployed me to get some orders.”

“Whipped,” Sirius teases through a counter-fit cough.

Marlene doesn’t hesitate before smashing the legal pad on his head. “And you traipsing around getting people to buy the tickets for the theatre department last semester even though Re was only playing Mercutio wasn’t you being wrapped around his littlest finger?”

Remus flushes, feeling an unnerving amount of bees stinging around his stomach, and is thankful when the conversation pauses after Sirius casts her a very heated V.  “Sod off.”

“So are you guys gonna buy or not?” Marlene huffs, weight slung to her left hip, and arms crossed against her chest.

“I’m a gay bloke, Marls, did you forget that?” Remus pins her with a one eyed squint, and she just scrunches her face up at him, exasperated.

“I’m sure there’s matching boutonnieres.”

“Fine, I just don’t have any school spirit  then.”

This time she glares. “Lily and James are Head Boy and Head Girl, isn’t there like an oath between you lot,  one for all and all for one, or some rot?”

“That’s the three musketeers,” he says.

“isn’t that basically who you guys are?” She reasons.

Before their wage of words could continue, Sirius just grabs the order form out of Marlene’s hands and fills out a sheet with the flurry of his pen. “Happy?”

“Positively delighted,” she leers, pecking them both on the cheek before strutting off, reminding them of their group study session at Alice’s tonight in her wake.

Sirius shakes his head, reluctantly amused with a grin gathering on the corners of his mouth, but for Remus everything feels like it’s frozen. “You didn’t have to do that you know? ’S not like James is much of a Head Boy anyhow, and Lily wouldn’t have really cared.”

Sirius shrugs, commences their walk to the opposite wing of the school for their shared history class. “Emmy likes that sort of romantical shite.”

Remus sees red, feels his heart lodging in his damn esophagus. “Oh, so— Erm,  you’re taking her then,” Remus wonders if his tone sounds as detached as he feels.

“Yeah,” Sirius eyes him, questioning. “She wants that title of snow queen real bad, made me promise I’d campaign with her and the whole shtick.”

“Oh,” it’s like Remus could feel it when he closes off completely, can feel his hopes squashed down and his heart contract and his every organ collapsing in on themselves, leaving him feeling hollowed out completely.

Sirius slows down marginally, eyeing him with a slight frown. “Is that all right? I know you two don’t exactly get along and we were planning to go as a group, bu—“

“It’s fine,” Remus hates how screechy his voice gets, how he feels like he’s about to scream. “You two are a shoe in, no doubt.”

Sirius tries to mirror Remus’s faux excitement with a tepid grin of his own, but Remus doesn’t let him, instead commandeering their typical table on the back row and tries focussing on the thousandth war with France while his world tilts off kilter.

.-

Emmy is beautiful, and popular and her smile alone dazzles the whole room. She’s everything that Sirius should look for in a partner, someone to match his whip lash wit, and his taste for all things exuberant that skirt on flashy, and someone who’s got just as many friends and admirers as him.

They’re perfect and Remus should just get over his petty ass hatred of her, even if he still thinks she can be down right cruel and selective and selfish. Qualities Sirius surely isn’t… But maybe it’s all in his head how she sneers at people who she finds plane, or how she literally guffaws over the misfortune of others. Maybe his perception of how she wields people in like moths to a flame just to get what she wants is all a misunderstanding, or in his head or something.

Maybe all that’s possible, even if Remus seriously doubts it.

But at the end of the day, Sirius loves her— has been basically infatuated by Emmeline Vance since she first transferred at the start of their Freshman year. Sirius loves her, and who ever Sirius loves is merely an extension of him… Right?

Remus just needs to get over it and somehow rid himself of this crush he’s been fostering for so long it’s basically a part of him at this point. Though, he thinks it’d be a lot easier if he didn’t see their faces plastered on posters everywhere the week and a half leading up to the dance— looking like actual royals that would put Will and cate to shame.

.-

“Yo cheekbones!”

Remus starts, swivels around from where he was scratching his pen to paper, finding Sirius— as glimmering and beautiful as always— swaggering up to him, insanely electric smile painted over his face.

“Would you rather eat a jumbo jar of jalapeños without a break, or eat the toenails from someone with athlete’s foot next to your dinner every night of the rest of your life?”

“I thought you were having lunch with Emmy to keep up your royalty status before this weekend?” Remus asks, tacitly side stepping from the horrific images swimming to the forefront of his mind because of his cruel question.

“Now that doesn’t sound like an answer to my ultimatum,” Sirius says in a singsong sort of voice.

“You answer me first,” Remus says airily.

“But I asked first,” Sirius argues haughtily.

“Well both your options would kill me, so I wouldn’t do either,” Remus retorts.

“That’s not how the game works!”

“You’re the one who always says that rules were made to be broken,” Remus says, lofty as all get out,, and dissolves into laughter at the completely cross look Sirius’s giving him.

“You were born to be contrary, weren’t you?”

“So lunch?”

“Got bored,” he shrugs, hopping onto the corner of the desk Remus’s working on. “What you up to instead of eating?”

“My position paper for Model UN.” Sirius smiles down at him, and Remus can’t help the flush that spreads across his cheeks in return. “Not as glamorous as running as Snow King, I know.”

“It’s precious,” Sirius contends, his soft timbre sounding like syrup and his long fingers fluttering against Remus’s skin, pushing back a lock of his ever disheveled, tawny curls in a far to gentle way, and Remus gulps before averting his gaze to break the sudden tautness that’s built between them. 

They’ve had so many of these almost moments, ones that Remus’s always treasured but he knows doesn’t mean much of anything at all to Sirius— Sirius who is effortlessly hilarious, and brims with genius and  who is so beautiful that sometimes it hurts looking at him for too long. Sirius who has a new suitor at his beck and call on a near weekly basis. But whenever they transpire now, it just hurts all the more because Remus knows in his heart of hearts that they will never lead anywhere, and Sirius is in love with Emmy and Remus can’t let himself float around in this daydream for any longer.

“Ahem,” he clears his throat, shuffles in his seat only slightly. “I’m Algeria so my Mam’s pretty excited about it. She’s been telling me all the stuff Wikipedia’s got wrong and everything.”

Sirius laughs, but it doesn’t touch his eyes. “Your mother is kinda everything, you know that?”

Remus twists his mouth up, reluctant. “Don’t tell her as much, or else she’ll go on and on how she won Miss Teen Great Britain when she was only sixteen.”

“Hmm, I was wondering where you got that pretty face.”

“You, Sirius Black, can go lick an unwashed arse.”

“You’ll never catch a suitor with that cheek of yours though. I’d work on that, Lupin.”

“I don’t think I could ever win Miss Congeniality, alas.”  Remus doesn’t quite catch Sirius’s reply, to busy responding too the text his phone just chirped with instead.

“Mary John, are you listening?”

“Uh-huh.”

Sirius’s brows hike up, flabbergasted smile stretched across his face. “So totally rude! And I came all the way here— to the place where dreamers die— just to spend time with you.”

“Sorry,” Remus gives him an abashed little half grin before setting the phone back down. “’s just Fabian.”

Sirius’s expression drops, goes inquisitive instead of his typical ebullience. “Fabian? Why’s Fabian Prewett texting you, and why is he,” Sirius crooks his head so he’s able to read the new message that popped up on Remus’s phone’s screen. “Asking about color coordination?”

Remus blushes for an entirely new reason now, one he likes much less. “Ah, he’s the sort to like it when our suits like match, but not in an abrasive fashion, you know?”

Sirius’s face goes scarily blank.

“Your suits? Suits for what?”

“The dance…” Remus says slowly, he’s confused what Sirius’s confused about.

“The dance… Right… I thought you were still going with everyone else?”

“Pff, no way,” Remus scoffs. “Lily’s  only pretending to be single, you know how red in the face she gets whenever around James. They’ll end up dancing the whole night away. And with Dorcas running the whole event and Benjy thinking any social function is a plague on society, that’d leave me stuck with Peter and Mary, . And honestly I’ve seen enough of her tongue shoved down his throat for a lifetime.” Remus is only slightly  surprised that doesn’t even elicit a chuckle from Sirius, who’s now looking a bit stormy— and he thinks he’ll never be accustomed to his mercurial moods that can change as quickly as the snap of the finger.

“Right… So you’re going with Fabian Prewett… as your date?”

“Yes… Why is that so hard to believe?”

“it’s, it’s not,” Sirius scrambles, suddenly standing up.

“Then why are you being so weird about this,” Remus argues, getting up to meet him at his level.

“Am not!”

“You’re going with Emmy,” Remus reminds him, this edge of desperate.

“I know I am, okay. But you— you—“ Sirius tappers off, eyes glassy and lips parted with words he can’t get out, and Jesus fucking Christ is it weird how for the first time ever their roles have reversed. Sirius can’t put any sentences together, and everything Remus’s been beating down—  everything thrashing inside of him— are now burning his throat and warring over who can spill out first.

“What? I’m suppose to stay behind like the pathetic, nobody friend. The guy who’s just there to moon after you while you have an actual life. The Judie garland to your Mickie Roomie!”

“What are you even talking about right now!” Sirius shouts, sounding as torn apart as Remus feels.

“As if you don’t know!” He snarls, collecting his books into his backpack— Suddenly this room feels to stifling. He can’t breathe and it’s too hot and his chest is pounding.

He’s imploding and Remus has no idea how to rectify it.

“Just stop! Remus Stop!”

“leave me the fuck alone Sirius!”

“Why are you being such a prick about this!”

And that, that makes Remus angry, angrier than he’s ever been.

Before he could even think about it for a moment longer, Remus is rounding on him, dashing so close to Sirius that he can taste his breath with how close their faces are skirting against each other.

“I’m in love with you! I’ve been in love with you for forever, and I know that you don’t feel the same way, and I know that you’re in love with Emmy and, and I just know okay.”

“Wha—“ Sirius sputters, looking like a gaping fish. “Wait a second, are you jealous? Of sodding Emmy Vance?”

“Don’t!” Remus practically growls out. "Don’t disrespect me, okay? Don’t pretend that you never knew, or that I was such a good actor. I’ve been in love with you for years and you always knew and Fine, I get it. You never felt the same way, that’s fine. But just don’t pretend as if you never had the choice, don’t make me out as the bad guy for actually, finally saying yes to a bloke who’s actually into me. I need to fucking give up on the premise of us, I need to get over you. So I’m going out with fucking Fabian Prewett and you’re going out with Emmy Vance and that’s that!”

His breaths are labored, jagged and painful, as they race out of him, but Remus can’t move. He’s staring straight into Sirius’s beautiful, gray eyes, and he sees everything he’s always seen there, and hates that this is probably the last time he’ll get to be this close to him.

Not after this.

“I didn’t,” is the first thing Sirius croaks out, broken and helpless. “i didn’t know, Remus you have to believe me— I didn’t—”

“How! How could you not know!” He shouts back, but Remus doesn’t get his answer in so many words, instead he feels it.

He feels it when Sirius clamps his hands on either end of his waste-line, feels it when Sirius smashes their lips together in a cacophony of lips, and teeth and spit. He feels it when Sirius moans in side of him, when his hand moves down, spreads across the width of the small of his back, pushing their torsos even closer. Remus feels it when everything goes into focus, when he takes Sirius into his arms, greedy and excited and disbelieving.

And Remus thinks to all the other times he’s kissed another boy— To this prior weekend swapping snogs with a beaming Fabian in the back of a theatre. He thinks of how there was never anything worth anything when he kissed any of them Because it was all Sirius, always Sirius. And he could try to love Fabian, or some other cute boy, and he tried, and he tried, and he tried, and he gave all he had…but it was never enough, could it ever be enough?

Remus knows it in his bones that it’s enough when it’s with Sirius.

When they finally pull apart it’s difficult to breathe and Remus feels lightheaded and it’s wonderful in the most marvelous of ways.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” Sirius says in a whisper. 

“Maybe next time give a guy some warning?” Remus can’t help the shit eating smirk that swipes across his mouth and is elated at the adorably cross scowl Sirius answers him with.

“Fine jackass, how’s this for a warning, I’m gonna kiss you now.”

“That’ll be sufficient, I suppose,” Remus goads, laughing against Sirius’s lips when he does just that.

~*~

Sirius ends up winning snow king, but rejects the dance with Emmy, opts to ask Remus to join him instead, as if they were in the middle of some John Hughes movie from the fucking 80s.

It’s utterly ridiculous and overdone and simply way too much— but everyone applauded and cheered and when Sirius kissed him in the middle of it, Remus felt as if his whole body sung with joy.

.-

~My Wolfstar FIC Masterlist

[flyinglotus777]

Netflix’s Squid Game

SPOILER ALERT! If you are interested in watching the series, I HIGHLY suggest you do so. This article will be an overall synopsis and my review of the show. For an in-depth analysis of the symbolism of the show and ending, scroll down to the fourth to last paragraph.

The Netflix show, “Squid Game,” written and directed by Hwang Dong-hyuk is a phenomenal Korean drama centered around our victor, Seong Gi-hun, played by Lee Jung-jae. Contestants were recruited to play in a life or death competition due to their lack of luck, financial knowledge, and influx of impending debt they have accumulated throughout their lives. We first meet Gi-hun as he is down on his luck. Living with his elderly, overworked mother (which in countries outside of the United States is not strange nor uncommon) Gi-hun was a friend to gambling, but that toxic love caused him to be in debt to a gang of (what seemed to be) loan sharks. When luck finally strikes him on the race track, life simultaneously decides to take an excrement on his reality. His debt seekers catch him on his hot streak and involuntarily sign him up to be a participant in the Squid Game.

Similar to many other of the 456 participants, they all shared a common denominator of being in situations it seemed only money could fix. Upon arrival the contestants were asked to voluntarily sign wavers in order to participate in the game, while unknowingly risking their lives, for the opportunity to win 456 billion won (which would be roughly over $3.5 million in US currency). The challenges were mostly based on nostalgic childhood games, both based in the United States and South Korea.

Now I knew due to the explanation in the introduction of episode one that if any player were to lose, they would die. So during the first challenge of red light green light, when players were bulletly penalized for losing I was not surprised. After the game, the players decided to rally together and quit playing. The influence of the cash prize split the decision down the middle, leaving the old man, player 1, to be the final decision. To my surprise he actually chose to decline, freeing all of the players. During the voting, many players screamed at each other as to why they would choose to stay in the hell hole as other players responded that the outside world was not any better if not the same as the harsh environment they were already in. This reality struck many contestants as they returned back to their reality of debt, dependents, and for some bounty hunts, thus resulting in them returning to the game.

During the whole season, I was trying to find the purpose of these games. We knew why the participants felt motivated to play, but I wondered what was the purpose of having them fight for their lives in the first place. When the PlayStation faced soldiers forced the doctor (player 111) to dissect the bodies for organs to sell at the black market, at first I thought that it was what the original game maker wanted which I thought was genius. Soon to learn that it was actually a violation to a code of equality that was placed inside the arena applying to all of those who existed, soldiers and participants alike. Which struck me as odd due to the soldiers being able to tote guns and wear masks based on their own hierarchy and the participants being collectively isolated and given numbers as if it was a remake of the Stanford Prison experiment. Nonetheless many soldiers faced the same fate as the players, and my pondering would meet the solution come the finale.

Let’s discuss players. I only favored Gi-hun because he was the protagonist, but throughout the story he grew on me as his big heart prevailed through the madness. I knew Choo Sang-woo, the embezzling business man and hometown friend of Gi-hun played by Park Hae-soo, was a psychopath when I saw him in a fully filled bathtub with his suit on. Running from the police, in debt or not, that’s just as much of a red flag for serial killer tendencies as sleeping with socks on or having too thin and highly arched eyebrows. The episode that he crossed Ali, the father of one from Pakistan with the missing fingers, made me hate Sang-woo for the rest of the series. I was infuriated and frustrated with Ali for being that naïve to believe that they could escape the round as a duo, but understood his perspective since up until that point Sang-woo was a dependable, trusted ally to Ali. However after that episode I didn’t care who won, I was just ready for Sang-woo to die.

Kang Sae-byeok, the skeptical and beautiful warrior from North Korea played by Jung Ho-yeon, deserves her own paragraph. Along with her beauty, her presence and demeanor was so bad ass. She was thrifty and intelligent, as her talent being pick pocketing. I was waiting for her to just be so bad ass. As the punk disguised to be gangster, Jang Deok-su, pushed her around which seemed to be normal behavior between the two, I was ready for Sae-byeok to twist his arm, send a plunging round house kick to his nuts, and cut his snake tattoo right off of his face. Although her exterior was tough, her heart was made of malleable gold which we got to see as she opened up to her female companion during the marble challenge and sobbed from her loss afterwards. Although she was not the killer bad ass queen I had wanted her to be, I still call her a warrior because of her resiliency throughout life’s and the game’s many obstacles and her drive to provide her younger brother with a better life.

Thankfully Deok-su got what he deserved as Han Mi-nyeo poetically decided to take both of their lives during the glass challenge. “You said we would be together till the end,” she said before diving into her inevitable death with her short lived lover. Mi-nyeo was incredibly annoying as I would often pinch the inside corners of my eyes and scratch my eyebrows when she would appear. However that crazy bitch served justice, and I love her for that.

I was highly disappointed by the demise of the detective Hwang Jun-ho, played by the handsome Wi Ha-joon. I was rooting for detective Jun-ho, as I’m sure we all were, on his pursuit to find his brother. I was not surprised that his brother was Front Man, as I had suspected that his brother must’ve died or been apart of the game making due to his absence in real life and the current game. After discovering his brother was the victor of his year, to me it only made sense that he would be apart of the game enforcement. As we saw from Gi-hun, a normal life is impossible to live after experiencing something so traumatic as a series of death ridden children games. However I was saddened and surprised that detective Jun-ho was unsuccessful in closing down the whole operation. I mean the man was close to performing forced, aristocratic fellatio in the name of serving and protecting the law. I truly thought because he had gotten so far and was so close to exposing the operation that the only choice he had was to be successful. At last he was shot and killed by his own blood, the one he had been looking for; providing us with a cinematic and heart jerking ending to detective Jun-ho.

Lastly lets discuss the old man, player 001 named O Yeong-su, whom I also nicknamed Poppy during the series. Deceivingly innocent and weak, I genuinely liked Yeong-su throughout the game play. I thoroughly enjoyed his relationship with Gi-hun and saw him as a valuable player in most instances. I believe he was one of the main reasons that Gi-hun continued to lead with his heart. Gi-hun claimed that Yeong-su was the reason he returned to the games and later found out that Yeong-su was the reason there were games in the first place. The climatic episode of the marble challenge was when their relationship had been defined as “gganbu” (which is a term for trusted, close friends in Korean, as explained in the series), thus Yeong-su establishing a special place in Gi-hun’s heart. During the challenge, Yeong-su begins to have an episode of what we all assumed to be dementia as the arena they are playing in is designed like his old neighborhood and he abandons the game to take a trip down memory lane. Gi-hun screams in frustration at the old man to play with him only to end up losing in their even and odd game and resulting in deceit, tricking the old man to let him be the victor. Now if I was Gi-hun, I would’ve convinced Yeong-su to let me hold his marbles for safe keeping and let him have a fun time reminiscing on his life while he ran down the clock. Then when it was time, I would’ve turned in all 20 marbles just as Sang-woo did and went about my business. It would’ve only been right for the old man to forfeit as he was already on his death bed, or so we innocently thought. Before I get into the ending, I want to talk about the last match between Sang-woo and Gi-hun.

Finally, the last game to see who would be victorious in a highly anticipated game of Squid between Gi-hun and Sang-woo. It seemed as if it were a battle between good vs evil; Gi-hun representing a more benevolent side as he would often optimistically look to help other competitors and extend the kindness he had been shown versus Sang-woo who represented a more vindictive and ruthless side, determined to hurt anyone in order to receive his highly coveted and long awaited prize in an arena that erased any foundation of morals or ethics as soon as the light turned red. Luck was on Gi-hun’s side as he had the opportunity to play offense. With a cunning mind and a vengeance for Sae-byeok’s death, Gi-hun delivered a can of whoop ass to his opponent. As the saying goes, the good shall always prevail. Perhaps his heart was too pure as Gi-hun halted from crossing the finish line and offered Sang-woo a chance to live, thus forfeiting the prize money. Needless to say, I applauded when Sang-woo committed suicide as it was the only right thing to do in his position.

A year passed by and Gi-hun seemed worse than before. Physically his style was bummy wealthy, a look pioneered by Bill Gates, but mentally he was in shambles. How could you blame him? Gi-hun discovered that the responsible party for these horrendous events was none other than his ggangbu, old man Yeong-su. The biggest, jaw dropping plot twist of the entire series. As they were joined on Christmas Eve and Yeong-su on his death bed, they placed one final bet on an assumed to be drunken, homeless man who sat on the streets as it snowed and waited for help to arrive. Yeong-su explained how he actually wanted to help people and give his money to people who needed it, but wanted to do it in an “entertaining way.” As Gi-hun flared with outrage towards the old man for finding amusement in killing people, the old man rebutted using horse races as an example of people’s amusement. Yeong-su also said he participated in the games because it was more fun to play than to be a spectator, which I had noticed him treating the competition as if it were adult summer camp. I had just assumed since he was old, he didn’t care if he had died or not.

I think most people will think that this show was a metaphor about how money and rich people are evil. However I think it can be seen as commentary on society as a whole, not just the wealthy. Yeong-su says on his death bed that it’s a test of humanity, and asks Gi-hun if he still has faith in humanity after what he has experienced. Although money was the luring motivator to win the game, people still chose to return to the competition to escape their problems. Sure, money was apart of their problems as all of the players (excluding Yeong-su) were in debt, but that was due to choices that they had made. Whether it had been through embezzling, gambling, lack of luck, or financial ignorance, it was the people who had gotten themselves into those situations. Money doesn’t have a personal vendetta against anyone nor does it have an inherent quality of good or evil. Money is a neutral energy used to be exchanged for goods and services. It’s people who designate that energy to their humane or inhumane desires.

Leading to the next point of the wealthy and how they are seen to be evil due to having wealth. Although I do believe that there are some wealthy people who act as villains, money didn’t create the villain inside of them. Those people were going to behave maliciously whether they have money or not. The VIPs, who were spectating the finale of challenges, were tied to a bank devoted to the wealthy and gambled on the competitors who played (and most likely helped subsidize the events). We place judgement on them, but as Yeong-su said, people gamble on horse races. Although people are not animals and by my knowledge I don’t believe most or any horses die during these races, it is still the principle of watching an entity being tortured for amusement, which is not only confined to the wealthy population. When the concept of killing and tormenting living breathing beings for amusement is normalized within society, the lines begin to blur on who is okay to perform and who is not. Take the audience of this show for example, we all watched a show where hundreds of people were mercilessly killed for the desire of winning a cash prize for our own amusement, thus making “Squid Game” the number one show on Netflix at the moment. Although the show is fictional and brilliantly written, this Hunger Games concept is not new. We come in contact again and again with the idea of people who are disadvantaged given an opportunity to better their lives through inhumane means, including risking their own lives or actively sacrificing the life of another, and being spectators on the edge of our seats who can’t seem to look away. It is no different than a Roman gladiator match in a grand colosseum, which in modern day would be a MMA fight at the MGM hotel. We blame it on the rich who are ridiculed for creating these events, but at the end of the day it is the people, rich,poor, and everyone in between, who continue to still go along with it and to some extent desire it. Which makes me question, what does that say about humanity, and do I actually have faith in us? Although Gi-hun went through hell and back, he still remained pure of heart and used his wealth to enhance his life and those around him; proving that wealthy people can still be benevolent and desire righteous good. Similar to Gi-hun, the optimist in me wants to believe that there are still people in this world with good hearts, but I guess we just have to wait until the time comes to see.

Ultimately the show was phenomenal, and definitely sparked a desire inside of me to watch more Korean dramas. I don’t think the show will have a second season. Simply because I think the story line would be better cut off there, thus leaving the audience always wanting more. However if season 2 ever comes out, I’m ready for Gi-hun to take a Liam Neeson approach to ending the Squid Game and hopefully with a beard. Thank you for reading my article. I know it was incredibly lengthy. I have just finished the season after a 2 day binge watch, and have a lot of emotions and thoughts ruminating in my brain. Let me know what you think of the show and what you think of the article. Did anyone else notice the paintings of the games on the walls of the dormitory?

God bless.

[corvidiss]

On the Creature’s early influences and how they affected his view of relationships.

(Two TL;DRs at the bottom; one as a detailed summary, one as a far briefer summary.)

I will refer to Frankenstein’s creation as the Creature rather than Adam in this essay, as A) not all people call him Adam, and B) it will avoid confusion with Adam from Paradise Lost.

When thinking about the maturity and motives of the Creature, I was compelled to think on his request for a bride, and his early influences. My thoughts on the matter follow:

The Creature grew up (though his body was adult, his mind was arguably reset and had to grow like a child’s) with no guidance from any parental figure or friend. Instead of being shown the ways of the world by someone, he had to find his way himself; and of the few human things that influenced him, three stand out: Society’s reaction to him, the epic poem Paradise Lost, and the De Lacey family.

Society’s reaction to the Creature was the first, and arguably most important, human factor that affected the development of his worldview. He is immediately abandoned by his creator, and shunned and attacked by the people he stumbles across. Later, Felix De Lacey attacks him violently. All this shows the Creature that he is unaccepted by humanity, and the constant denial of the kindness and love which should come with family (his father, Victor) or familiarity (the family he helped and grew to love) is sure to make him wonder if he’s unworthy of it. His experiences subtly teach him that he is incapable of being loved by humanity, however much he is capable of loving them, and however much he longs for it.

The second factor I’ll address is Paradise Lost, which the Creature says had a profound effect on him. I’ve not read Paradise Lost myself, but I’ve gained the best impression I can from plot summaries and thematic analyses online.

(It is worth mentioning that the Creature relates to Satan – “I ought to be thy Adam; but I am rather the fallen angel, whom thou drivest from joy for no misdeed. In Paradise Lost, when Satan comes to Earth to take revenge on God by causing the downfall of his newest and most favoured creations, he is moved to great envy at the sight of Adam and Eve’s innocent happiness; a feeling the Creature will come to know all too well.)

In Paradise Lost, there is no depiction of familial love; only of divine love (of God) and romantic love, and the former is presented as more important than the latter. But the Creature has been shunned by God’s creations, and has been denied the love of his creator, whom he might compare to Adam and Eve’s God – so perhaps the Creature sees divine love as inaccessible to him, and romantic love his only remaining option in a theoretical companion.

Furthermore, when Eve eats the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, Adam chooses to do so too, because he feels his connection to Eve is so strong that they must share each other’s fate, whatever it may be. The Creature has never experienced this kind of devoted connection himself, nor has anyone sacrificed anything for him. Reading about this connection, he must have longed for such a thing himself – a thing, he sees, which has its source in romantic love.

And finally, when Adam and Eve leave their paradise, they are horrified at what they have doomed humanity to, but are comforted by the knowledge that their offspring will have revenge on Satan, and by each other’s love. While Adam’s choice to eat the fruit as well, valuing romantic love over divine love, is depicted as bad in Paradise Lost, Adam and Eve’s romantic connection is shown to be strong enough to keep them happy when they are expelled from their home and the favour of their creator. The Creature might see in this, that if he had a partner like Adam had Eve, he would be able to live with and even enjoy his own exile from humanity.

And thirdly, the De Laceys. Here is the Creature’s only source of what familial love is – and while he sees it to be a comfort to the family, it cannot truly combat the sadness and despondency that hangs over them. They spend evenings listening to the father’s music or reading aloud, but the happiness it affords them, and the happiness it affords the Creature, both fade soon after.

When Safie – Felix’s romantic love – comes along, however, the family’s spirits are brightly restored and their despair disappears. They teach and welcome her – and by doing so teach and, in a way, welcome the Creature too; everything is better for Safie’s presence. Where familial love was inadequate, this appearance of romantic love banishes the family’s sorrow.

Regardless of the true meanings and causes behind the De Lacey’s sorrow and return to happiness, these were the first impressions the Creature got, and so must have shaped his view of the world.

The Creature might be compared to children raised on classic Disney movies of princesses and princes and the portrayal of romantic love in modern media – seeking to enter a romantic relationship before they know what it truly means, or before they are ready, or even before they know true friendship. He grew up an outcast from society, and with sources that taught him of the power of romance, and not its nuances, or what else is possible and just as powerful.

As a result, he sees the only chance of gaining happiness to lie in romantic love. He no longer wishes for the acceptance of his creator – which he has come to see will never be granted to him, and perhaps even begins to believe that he does not deserve it – and instead demands the creation of another like him, so he can have this romantic love which he has been taught, inadvertently, is the only thing that can lift him from his despair.

In short, he's a child who is misguided about relationships: Paradise Lost showed blissful harmony (something which does not occur perfectly in most romances), and the imbalance of power and knowledge between woman and man. While somewhat in keeping with the sexist views of the time, this is a bad starting point for forming romantic relationships when one has had barely any contact with people, let alone the personal interactions necessary for forming one's own opinions on the difference, or lack thereof, in qualities between genders. Not only this, but he is simply not ready for a romantic relationship, especially with someone of an adult age, given his incredibly small experience of relationships and of the world as a whole – and therefore shouldn't be pushed into romantic relationships until he gains more experience as he grows, just like any other child.

Thank you for reading. :)

(TL;DRs beneath cut.)

TL;DR 1:

The Creature was raised with three main human influences: neglect from humanity, Paradise Lost, and the De Lacey family.

The neglect he experienced (Victor's abandonment, the villagers' attacks, Felix's attack) taught him that he is only going to be denied the kindness and love that should come with family (Victor) or familiarity (the family he helped for so long).

Paradise Lost contains only divine love (of God) and romantic love, and since the Creature has been denied the love of his own creator, he might see that romantic love is all that is left to him. The connection between Adam and Eve is strong – the Creature, who surely longs for such a connection, would see its source in romantic love. When Adam and Eve leave their paradise, their love makes it bearable – if the Creature had that love, perhaps, he might think, his own shunned existence would be easier, or even enjoyable.

The De Laceys' familial love is present, but seems inadequate to combat the sadness and despair that hangs over them. But when Safie, a romantic love, arrives, everything gets better and the happiness is restored. Romantic love seems, to the developing Creature’s mind, stronger than familial, whether it be true or not.

The Creature was raised with the concept of romance as a cure for sadness, perhaps similarly to how children grow up on the presentation of love in the modern media. He has come to see romantic love as the only thing that can give him happiness, without knowing its nuances or even what friendship is.

He's a child who is misguided about romantic relationships, and who simply can't be ready for them, given his incredibly small experience of the world and the people that inhabit it.

TL;DR 2:

The Creature’s view of the world was shaped by the few distant human influences he had in his developmental early age – the neglect of humanity, Paradise Lost, and the De Lacey family. All of these contributed towards the idea that romantic love was the Creature’s only remaining chance at happiness, while not teaching him the values of friendship and the subtleties of romance and love in any form.

He was misguided by his influences and convinced that romance was the only thing that could grant him happiness; but with so few experiences of people and the world as a whole, he is not only drastically ill-suited for a romantic relationship, especially with someone of an adult age, he is simply not ready, and therefore shouldn't be pushed into romantic relationships until he gains more experience as he grows, just like any other child.

[bardicindignation]

Reasons Why the Master Should've Been the Timeless Child

Okay, so I was re-watching some Doctor Who the other day, and I got to thinking about all of the problems I had with Chibnall's writing with the Master (rip Missy's excellent character development) and the whole 'Timeless Child' thing in general. And then it occurred to me that it would make way more sense (and, in my opinion, far more compelling) if the Master had been the Timeless Child instead of the Doctor.

and then I talked to @rhea-imagined about it and decided that I would make my first attempt and a semi-coherent meta post:

It would make the Master going absolutely apeshit and destroying all of Gallifrey even after all of the progress Missy had made make, just, so much more sense

Ruth and the whole 'past regenerations that the Doctor doesn't remember' thing can totally stay. Maybe the Doctor was one of the original Timelords to receive regenerations but didn't know where they'd come from. They find out and, being themself, rescue the Master, steal a Tardis and run away.

That could go a long way to explaining why the timelords hate them so much, plus the whole "wanted for a bunch of crimes thing" bc god knows the Time Lords wouldn't let them go easily and wouldn't put setting the Judoon on the Doctor beyond them at all. Plus, it's the Doctor, so they're running into all sorts of trouble along the way anyhow

(just now realizing that, technically, this would make the Master the Doctor's first companion, which is extremely funny)

And the Doctor and the Master spend who knows how long running from Gallifrey, planet to planet, world to world, causing and solving problems in equal measure, and they're the best (and most chaotic of course) of friends

and the Master still chooses the name Master, but it's really short for (or else it just doesn't quite come across in translation) 'Master-of-One's-Own-Fate'

But then the timelords catch up, and it's over. But the Master is so important, and the Doctor so brilliant (and therefore useful, and also as leverage), that they can't just kill them and so they erase both of their memories entirely.

And all of this would go a long way to explaining the Doctor and the Master's relationship, as well as why the Master is Like That because

everything that happened would result in, just, an enormous amount of trauma: rage, hurt, fear, emotional pain, the whole kit and caboodle, which wouldn't necessarily go away with a memory wipe

what the memory wipe would do is take away any means that the Master would have had to deal with it: speaking from personal experience, it's almost impossible to deal with that kind of emotion in any kind of constructive way if you have no idea why you're feeling it

So what you end up with is a genius (who, to be honest, might not have been the most stable of beings before the memory wipe) with a near-bottomless well of all of that mess of emotion and trauma with no direction for it whatsoever. Add to that the High Council electing to send back the signal to save Gallifrey and driving the Master mad at age eight...yeah, they pretty much screwed the Master (and themselves, and the Doctor) over with that one, on top of all the other ways they'd already been screwed over

So: insane, incredibly traumatized genius who's filled to the brim with rage with no direction. Why does he fixate on the Doctor? because of their interactions in the past:

He loves the doctor because they were friends, and the doctor tried SO HARD to save him, and he HATES the Doctor because the doctor should be able to save him, should KNOW and UNDERSTAND him better than anyone and it's like they don't REMEMBER HOW

(Which, of course, isn't rational, because them getting caught wasn't the doctor's fault, and it's not the doctor's fault that they don't remember anything, but, again, if you don't know why you feel something you can't cope with it, suss it out and deal with it)

and then meanwhile, you've got the Doctor, who's also got an unhealthy dose of trauma from everything just, perhaps, somewhat less severe, and they haven't been driven insane by the drums.

What the Doctor's got is this perpetual feeling of guilt for failing the Master, even when stuff happens that isn't in any way shape or from their fault, or even having anything to do with them, because they tried SO HARD in that past life to save them, and it didn't work. Helloooo, guilt complex (that they probably already had, this just makes it worse)

(Also goes a long way to explain the whole insane amount of mercy and forgiveness and love the doctor had for the master)And so, even when the Master becomes Missy and the madness is gone, there's still that rage, and still with no direction, because she CANT REMEMBER so she takes it out on what she always does: that which is important to the doctor

Which, incidentally, is WHY the whole basement imprisonment stuff was beginning to work, because Missy was finally starting to figure out that she isn't actually angry with the doctor at all, doesn't hate them

also, I'd like to think, that after the Master finds out the truth, the whole O thing, would have gone VERY differently

Like, still would've been a total shitshow, but maybe not so much with the world domination and they trying to kill the doctor and her friends because he's finally found where his anger actually goes (and had already begun to figure out where it DOESN'T while he was Missy)

(He still doesn't explain anything useful, bc he still (rather pettily) hates that the doctor forgot and wants her to figure it out herself, rip)

And maybe, when the Master is the timeless child, he doesn't burn all of Galiffrey. Maybe he leaves the civilians, the ones who aren't time lords, who didn't know, didn't benefit the way the Time Lords did. Maybe he leaves the children, who didn't know better, because he's seen what these people DO to children, and its not their fault. Maybe he leaves the Doctor's adopted family and any of their kids/grandkids who are still alive, bc they always cared for them, both of them, and they never knew either

Maybe he only burns the old, callous, cowardly and cruel timelords who got them into this damn mess in the first place and did nothing to fix it, those high handed bastards who would have seen him and the doctor utterly destroyed and gladly profited from their pain

(maybe he waits for the Doctor to figure stuff out, and they make a bonding experience out of blowing up the Citadel or something and then leave again. If Romana's still around, she can be in charge lol.)

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

[mostly-hannibal-memes]

Hannibal Fic Recommendation List - Infidelity

Infidelity fics

Back to Overview

Falling Away with You by Shotgun_sinner Will Graham is a private detective with a fiancée who doesn't understand him, his empathy disorder, or his obsession with catching the Chesapeake Ripper. His night terrors force him into an ultimatum; couple's therapy, or their relationship is done. Will meets his new therapist, Hannibal Lecter, and his entire world is turned upside down. Words: 192,001 Chapters: 31/31 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Find Me In The Dark by Rising_Phoenix After a fateful accident, the marriage of Will Graham and Hannibal Lecter has reached its end. Grief and the inability to stop them from falling apart has brought an irreconcilable distance between the formerly deeply devoted couple. While Hannibal is apathetic towards his husband, ignores him, and is withdrawn, Will has started an affair with fellow teacher Francis and drowns his desperation in more and more alcohol. Both men are not ready to give up the memory of the happiness they once had together and are still not able to reach out for each other when they need it the most - but then a trip to visit family changes everything... Warning: Will has at the beginning of the story a relationship (and sex) with Francis. Hannigram though is endgame. Words: 40,131 Chapters: 16/16 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

throne by YouAreMyDesign Hannibal's gaze sharpens, and he lets out an aggravated noise. "A surrogate," he repeats. "I believe you were the one who made it perfectly clear that I must sate my needs on my own. That I can do as I please, as long as it does not rely on your involvement." Words: 4,217 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Putain des Palaces by cicak They are having an affair. He tells himself he won’t let it get in the way of the plan. Words: 3,889 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Housekeeping by FKAHerSweetness Marriage is a creature living separate from its components. Yet it requires attention, tolerance and care. Have you seen it? Could you recognize its deep wounds - and which one of you inflicted them? And are they ready to heal? What do you really know about this illusory animal? Words: 96,562 Chapters: 19/19 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

A Christmas to Remember by EarthsickWithoutYou Will Graham is looking forward to a peaceful and relaxing vacation with his girlfriend Molly at a luxurious ski resort. Little does he expect to run into his ex-husband, Hannibal Lecter, who is staying at the same resort with his own companion, Alana Bloom. Will thought he left his love for Hannibal -- secretly the brutal Chesapeake Ripper -- deep in his abandoned past as an FBI profiler, but as Christmas magic fills the air and Hannibal begins working his charm to the hilt to try and win his ex's heart again...perhaps Will is not quite so over Hannibal, after all. Words: 32,164 Chapters: 7/7 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

the stop place by bluecarrot Will Graham has an affair. Words: 13,764 Chapters: 11/11 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

To Impress by Everett_Harte, sku7314977 Chilton invites Matthew to a soiree after a work incident as his plus one to pay the orderly back for saving his life, Matt invites his new boyfriend Will and Hannibal decides that he would very much like to get to know Matt's boyfriend a little better. Words: 12,099 Chapters: 3/3 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Flight of a Buteogallus Anthracinus by IHidMyFaceFromYouNoMore Will Graham and Hannibal Lecter have been together just the two of them for a good while – until Will's long time friend Matthew Brown wedges himself between them. Something has to be done about it. Words: 5,084 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Crystalline by The Druid Gurl (DruidGurl) Stripper!Hannibal AU (sort of) The proprietor of a successful restaurant, Hannibal (who may or may not be a serial killer and definitely WAS an exotic dancer in his youth) is coerced by an old acquaintance to take a job dancing at a bachelor party. When he shows up, he realizes a mistake has been made, but he also realizes something far more interesting: the groom to be is hotter than Mt. Vesuvius. Circumstance and intent lead the boys where it always should: into bed. A lot. Words: 59,216 Chapters: 6/6 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Teach Me a Lesson (Already Learned) by whenitstarted Will being married to Molly and cheating on her with Hannibal. Words: 3,142 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Bittersweet Symphony by eicilux "Am I supposed to call him Dad?" Hannibal asked, undoing a button on his suit jacket. He was wearing a three-piece suit. Leave it to his now-stepson to dress more formally than himself at his own goddamn wedding."No, uh..." Will cleared his throat, extending a hand. "Will is fine." Dad would've made him feel old. He was forty. Hannibal shook it. "Pleased to meet you, then, Will." Molly smiled radiantly at both of them. shameless pwp <3 based on this thread Words: 10,303 Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Explicit Warnings: Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

[theydigthecape]

it may not a kind story, but it is a good one.

it’s not a happy or uplifting story, nor is it a story about superheroes superheroing, saving people and/or ‘the world’. some people die, some people live, and it’s mostly up to chance or fate. some people are saved, some people aren’t, some don’t need to be saved, and some choose not to be saved, if one can term it saving. what constitutes the twinned notion of saving and being saved is based on personal biases and values; it differs depending on the person, and this story acknowledges that. it as well acknowledges the world as important both conceptually and in hard scientific fact, given that without a combination there would be no story to tell

Monstress isn’t a story about ‘a’ world or even ‘the’ world, conceptual or terra firma, though its worldbuilding is fantastic. it is, in fact, a story about women. all sorts of women, living all sorts of lives. it’s a story about mothers, and about the daughters of those mothers, and about the importance of mothers to daughters, and vice versa. it’s a story about one particular daughter of one particular mother, along with all of the mothers and daughters stretched back along their line behind them

it’s a story about a daughter who loved her mother, and who still obsessively loves her mother many years after her mother’s death. it’s a story about a daughter whose dead mother is still the driving force in her life. it’s the story of a daughter who hates her dead mother as much as she loves her, and wants to understand how and why that mother did what she did to make her daughter what she is

it’s a story about monsters, of course; monsters of every branding you could possibly imagine, physical, psychological, metaphorical, and so many more. it’s a story about the perception of monstrosity: about what makes a thing or person seem monstrous to another person, and why. it’s a story that tips its reader’s perceptions over like a raccoon with a waste bin, and leaves the contents scattered about, oracle bones to be interpreted anew

it’s a story about people being ineradicably people, no matter what shape or size or genetic variation they come in, and those kinds of stories will always be favourite

this is Maika Halfwolf, and Monstress is her story

she’s an arcanic, a person whose DNA is a blend of human and Ancient, and her genetics have given her some abilities that, to many people of many different cultures and races, even her own, make her seem monstrous

she’s also a survivor of a genocidal war that slaughtered thousands of arcanics, enslaved them, and butchered them for magical and scientific experiments, as well as to harvest the innate properties of their blood and bones

she’s a trained killer, a living weapon in more than one way, and a source of ancient power that pretty much everyone wants. all she wants is a better understanding of her own nature, along with closure for her traumatic childhood, and she’s not swayed by appeals to her better nature. if someone wants something from her, they’d better have something she needs or wants for bargaining, otherwise it’s right out. for every story where a protagonist is swept along on the ‘good of all’ bullshit fed them, Maika is the ultimate antidote. she does have her soft spots, but they are few and far between, and well hidden

also, if you piss her off too much (or even if you don’t), she has an old god who eats people living in her left arm stump so. yeah, she’s disabled, did i mention?

probably don’t piss her off. except that she lives in a state of permanent pissed off and people will keep trying to get their hands on her

her companions are a fox arcanic (Kippa) and a nekomancer (Ren)

idk, if these two don’t make you want to read this story just by existing...?

so yeah, fox people of all permutations (and wolf people, and bear people, and shark people, and basically every Ancient-human hybrid imaginable). and cats. just cats. lots of cats who are cats that look and act like cats but also speak the languages of Ancients and humans, and can walk on their hind legs if they feel like it (which, i mean. It Happens). look up there at Ren. two tails aside, that could be my cat looking at me and saying, ‘We’re fucked’. it’s very cool feline representation, and it makes me very happy :)

Monstress is steampunk fantasy influenced and informed by Chinese and Japanese legends and mythology, with a side dose of general Western fantasy mythology. the writer is Taiwanese-American, the artist Japanese, and they’re both women. Monstress is written by women about women, and the queer is strong with this one. romantic relationships aren’t the focus, the genre is steampunk fantasy/horror, not romance. but if fantasy with acknowledged and accepted queer life woven through it, a lesbian protagonist, and many queer and queer-coded women and nonbinary characters is your thing, Monstress will make your day

it definitely made mine. i started reading the first volume yesterday, and i’m already on the fourth and thanking providence that there’s a fifth volume left to read and a sixth being released in September, with the comic ongoing. i added it to my pull list last night

fair warning, if it hasn’t come across: this is a gory story. there is child death, and that death is often brutal. it is not, as i stated at the top of this post, a kind story. there’s racism, genocide, people being horrible to other people in most every way they can, though no rape so far, either explicit or alluded to. one more indication that an allo cishet dude’s not writing or drawing for this title

don’t get me wrong, there are many good comics being drawn and written by allo cishet dudes, but. historically most comics writers and artists have been allo cishet dudes, even when the characters they create are queer. i’m very glad that isn’t the case this time out