#where she can recognize when someone is trying to manipulate her BEFORE she does a terrible thing

[piratefalls]

upon whatever number rewatch this is at this point (3? 4?) i just clocked that adalind actually looks uncomfortable when she’s flying to vienna at the end of season 3. like she’s telling herself, on repeat, “it was for my baby” while also not feeling good about the thing she did. she’s trying so hard to justify it to herself but she can’t even make herself fake a smile. she’s not proud. she’s a desperate mother who wants her child back and will do whatever it takes to accomplish it.

[ataraxiaspainting]

There is an Uproar.

Yan Gojo x F Reader.

Synopsis: Satoru thinks you simply haven’t come around yet.

Warnings: Yandere themes, stalking, threats of kidnapping, delusional Gojo, and manipulation.

Word Count: 3.2k.

Ten Songs Like This Piece:

Six Forty Seven by Instupendo

Money, Money, Money by ABBA

Choke - Acoustic by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

Me and the Devil by Soap&Skin

Breezeblocks by alt-J

Feeling Good by Micheal Bublé

Claus by Los Tres

Bleed Magic by I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

This Could Be Us by Rae Sremmurd 

Do I Wanna Know? by Arctic Monkeys

“You're like a half-tamed creature, still shy of the bridle. 'Except you enthrall me, never shall be free.' But freedom is an illusion, anyway.” – Nenia Campbell, Fearscape

*~*~*~*

Satoru came to your door with gifts again; mochi, bubble tea, bouquets of roses, keychains, jewelry, books… everything you could ever ask for he either had in his hands or would quickly get for you by whatever means necessary.

It’s a shame really that you refuse to show your true feelings for him, especially after all he has done to make you happy. But he can be patient when he wants to be, and so with a not-yet-broken heart, at least fifteen gift bags wrapped around both his clenched hands, and a chuckle he rings your doorbell twice. He could hear some shuffling from inside and a shout of coming.

The voice was high-pitched and cheery from the sound of it. His eyes lit up then as he smiled widely. But as soon as the door opened, his smile slightly faltered as his gaze met eyes he had never seen before.

The woman in front of him was not you. What was she doing in your apartment?

His first thought was to assume she was an intruder, someone who broke into your home, stole your belongings and money, hid you in a closet or under cement, and is pretending to be you for the time being. Well, he can’t be fooled so easily if that was the case. But he then chose to let the woman speak before coming to conclusions. Though she was wearing your cute Hello Kitty hoodie and utterly adorable My Melody headband and had one of your pore strips on her nose. She obviously knew you in some way, and so he in turn needed to know her.

The woman waved at him and slowly looked down from his face to the many presents in his hands. Her head turned then, a huh accidentally coming from her lips.

“Hello miss,” Satoru tries his best to be polite and not have any bias towards her, but it is indeed hard to do so. It is hard to not have any bias and not entertain the idea of snapping her neck, because he does not know her and she is not you. He does not recognize her from any of your friend groups, and it took everything in him to not sneer and glare at her and demand to know where you were.

“Hey,” She seems to try her best to be polite too, trying to hide her confusion behind a small smile. “Can I help you?”

Satoru nods, trying to put on an eager and friendly front. He then gestures towards the gifts in his hands and chuckles. He fakes almost dropping one for dramatic effect. It seemed like it worked because the woman gasped and then sighed in relief as Satoru caught it in time before it could fall on the floor.

“I am looking for [First], I thought she would be here.” The stranger nods, her smile becoming more prominent. As a result, his own became more prominent too, though his was fake. “I’m her boyfriend. Wanted to surprise her, you know?” 

He is technically not lying. He’s right if anything. Once you stop playing hard to get and fall into his arms, he’ll officially be known as such. He’s right, if only you stopped pretending to be so disinterested.

“Ah, I see!” The woman answers, her eyes inviting and curious. He sighs, faking a small sob and groan. She looked concerned then.

“If only she was here, I always love seeing her smile!” He closes his eyes, trying his best to look sadder than a kicked puppy. “I suppose she’s not here right now…”

With how the girl steps to the side, her hand gesturing towards the apartment hallway, Satoru knows that his plan worked.

*~*~*~*

“I’m Eve, her roommate, nice to meet you!”

“The same to you.”

“So how long have you two been together?”

“A long time, we’ve been together since our high school days!”

“She sure is lucky to have such a devoted boyfriend, huh?”

He laughs at the compliment, his back crouched a bit downward at an angle so he could be more comfortable walking about. Eve chuckles at his casualness.

“You sure got her a lot,” Her tone is sweet, another piece of proof to reassure Satoru that she trusts him fully. Until you eventually show up from wherever you have gone and start spewing lies, she will continue to be that way. You seem to not have good taste in roommates, it seems because Eve is far too naive for your safety. “Like a lot. Do you come here often? I just moved in so…”

Satoru doesn’t pay attention to her questions as he fantasizes about the day when you move into his place and you sleep next to him and wake him up with good morning kisses. A beautiful ring will adorn your finger one day, and you will enthusiastically anticipate his arrival from work while adorning the makeup he favors and styling your hair to his liking.

It was a small, cramped apartment, one definitely not worth how much money you rent it for. “I never get tired of how cute [First] makes this place. With both her presence and how she decorates everything. She has good taste.” He goes into the kitchen area, still having his arms hooked by the strings of the many gift bags, and looks around at the scented candles, dried flowers, and baked cookies on the table. “[First] made these, right?”

“Yeah,” Eve really is stupid, isn’t she? If he were a burglar she would be dead on the spot. How could she possibly protect you from any danger? He would obviously be a better housemate than her. 

Satoru leans towards the kitchen table and snatches a cookie from the cooled baking sheet, biting into it and chewing loudly. 

“Delicious, right?” Eve asks, giggling. She does not seem scared at all and seems to have no boundaries whatsoever.

He agrees, quickly devouring the entire confection and licking his fingers clean. “She’s always been a good baker. There’s a good recipe she knows for pie too. Maybe I’ll ask her to make it for me sometime…” He hums as he sets all the gifts down on the back coffee table. “She sure is a catch, wouldn’t you say? Her baking is one of the reasons I was so attracted to her in the first place.”

Your roommate nods. Satoru considers taking his leave now, but he has never been in your apartment during the day before. 

He may as well stay a while. It will be fun, he tells himself.

So, he walks into the living room and starts reading the titles of books on the shelving next to your writing desk. A lot of horror and romance books from the looks of it. Classic little you.

He then looks over to your computer. 

“So sweet, like a cupcake,” He touches the top of the laptop, his fingertips tracing the many rainbow stickers that cover it. You really are just the best, aren’t you?

Before he could open it though, he could hear keys jingling. You’re here.

“I’m back–” As if you were a sort of lightbulb running out of power, your cheerfulness declines smoothly and steadily, being quickly replaced by a cute sneer.

Satoru lets out a loud laugh. He adjusts his stance, placing a hand on his waist.

“Ah, [First], honey! Welcome back, I brought you some gifts!”

Instead of responding, you turn to Eve, your scowl turning into a simple frown. Advancing swiftly, you approach her, closing the distance with eyebrows ascending in sudden understanding. Eve, on the other hand, responds by tilting her head to the side, resembling a perplexed canine, in clear bewilderment of your abrupt outburst.

Gently, you grasp her hands within your own.

“Eve, I forgot to tell you something important.” You point at Satoru with a shaky finger. He simply chuckles in response, amused with how quick you are to hide your excitement. “Whatever you do, don’t let him in.”

Eve lets out a sound of surprise. “Huh, what, why?”

Your gaze meets Satoru’s and you look like you could hardly breathe.

“He is a stalker; he is always lying to people and saying that we are dating and are head over heels in love, but don’t believe him one bit.”

His eyes dart across the room as he loses eye contact with you and Eve. All the while, as his head darts from side to side, he pouts, puffs up his cheeks childishly, and leans back slightly against the wall, not too oblivious but subtle to his amusement. His face is a mask of innocence and confusion, trying to appear like he is not aware of what is going on–when he is very much aware of it and is silently enjoying it.

He loudly sighs and rolls his eyes, his hands sliding to his face as he brings them up to cover his sunglasses and mouth. He is trying to hide a smile, the act of which is just too much for his face to handle. He keeps shaking his head in dramatic disbelief and he turns to the side to lean against the wall harder as he puts his head down, shaking his head in exaggerated betrayal. 

Satoru tries his best to not laugh again, it would ruin his marvelous performance.

He is the most captivating person in this room, you and Eve must be hung up on his every action and word, you two cannot look past his incredible acting.

Nobody is capable of acting to the degree that he is, his performances are legendary and his acting skills are unparalleled.

He is simply the best there is and ever will be. If there were a competition in this room to win an Oscar for best acting, he is certain that he would be taking that home. There is nothing on God’s green earth that can get in the way of him delivering these lines and excellent movements. He is so talented and so experienced, who could ever deny his skills?

“Gojo,” You say coldly. “Get out.”

He expects you to see the gifts, how heartbroken he is, and finally admit that you are just as much in love with him as he is with you. Instead, he could swear for a moment that he could hear crickets, before realizing that it is the wick of the candle on your kitchen table burning. As he surveys you and Eve he notices that he is getting no reaction.

“Babe.” When you don’t respond to the nickname, he snuffs a huff. “Stop pretending, okay?”

He thought that he was killing that acting.

He can’t believe that no one is buying his performance. He’s got the attitude, he’s got the swagger, he’s got it all, but neither of you are falling for it. This is just insulting. He knows he’s great, he knows he is delivering the performance of his life but for some reason, neither you nor Eve can see it! He is in absolute shock.

So, Satoru walks up to you and grabs your face.

He looks at Eve and she doesn’t look at him, she looks at you. That is fine, as long as he can still talk to her and you everything will be alright in the long run. Everything is going to be okay, he tells himself.

“Eve, can [First] and I have a few minutes alone?” Her eyes race to every corner of the room and slowly but surely make their way to the gold coins in his free hand. Multiple emotions spread across her face; confusion, greed… consideration. “It will only be for a sec, okay?” 

With a measured pace, Eve approaches his outstretched palm, her eyes fixated on the glistening gold. Her gaze mirrors that of a ravenous crow or a parched man deprived of water for days, or sustenance for weeks. Quivering hands accept the money, and in silence, she retreats to her room, closing the door behind her.

“Come on, drop the funny games,” Instead of directing your gaze towards him, your eyes fixate on the entrance of Eve's bedroom. The door is adorned with a vibrant pink poster of a popular musician, adorned with splashes of colorful paint. Inwardly, he reassures himself that this situation is acceptable. After all, the two of you are now in a private and secluded space. 

There is no longer anyone to hinder you from expressing your genuine emotions towards him. Surely you will finally admit them. Then you will eventually move to his place and stay there, happy and loving towards him at long last. All in due time, because Satoru can be patient when he wants to be.

“Get the fuck out. You sick–”

But now he does not want to be patient. He just wants to hear those words leave your pretty lips.

“Ah, ah, ah, watch your language, sweetie.” He interrupts you, placing a finger on your mouth. 

The mere expression on his countenance carries ample weight to silence your profanity-laden tirade.

He only perceives the captivating, extraordinary, flawless woman whom he is obligated to assist. You possess an excessive amount of independence - too unbound, unwilling to embrace his assistance, his presents, his finances - there exists a rationale why partners watch out for one another. Are you not aware of that? 

“That’s better.” He smiles and you start faking a shiver. “You really can listen when I finally put my foot down, huh? You can be stubborn with other people, you know, just not with me.”

He possesses strength - you lack it. You are so small compared to him. 

He possesses a keen understanding of the streets, while you lack that astuteness. The dress you have chosen to wear is excessively revealing. 

“Now, now, don’t cry. Shh, shh, shh. It was the only way I could see you, with how much you love to play hard to get.”

One can only imagine the number of individuals whom you captivated during the brief period you ventured outside today.

He possesses intelligence, while you lack it. You may believe otherwise, and you indeed excel in certain areas, such as your meticulousness in personal hygiene, which he acknowledges with humility, and your skill in baking, as well as your expertise in creating a cozy and plush bed. However, numerous matters elude your knowledge, such as selecting the right candidate in the upcoming election, performing a tire replacement, or operating a debit card. He is strong, while you are not. He is drawn to you for not being - captivated by your feminine allure; the way your body gently curves, your delicate touch, the fragrance that surrounds you, the melodic tone of your voice, and above all, your complete vulnerability when confronted with danger.

“Now, open your gifts. I did carry them all the way here after all.”

When you finally surrender, he will assume control over every decision you make. 

From selecting your attire to choosing items at the grocery store, he will dictate how you interact with other men and even how you smile. He believes you are incapable of handling even the simplest tasks. Additionally, he takes pleasure in instructing you on matters you are expected to be ignorant about. It's quite endearing, isn't it? 

He views you as his possession and will never, under any circumstances, let you slip away.

At his place, he has so many pretty outfits for you to choose from. A lot of aprons and cute dresses. All the while he downs a beer or seven with his friends and jokes about how nice you look cleaning. You'll listen to him rant about anything that comes into his mind, taking it all with a smile. It is not unusual for him to lay awake at night imagining what life would be like with you as his wife. First, he needs to show you your position as his wife and get rid of this misguided sense of independence you seem to be clinging to. What a dumb girl you are. It was meant to be, wasn't it? You are meant to be his girlfriend and eventually his wife, and you will by any means Satoru has to take.

He does not care what he has to do as long as the result is you finally giving in and loving your place in his arms. It is what you were made for. It is what he was made for.

So pretty. So stupid.

“Now, now. Stop crying, you’ll only ruin your makeup.”

*~*~*~*

On that particular evening, Satoru once again paid a visit to your apartment. However, instead of observing from a distance, he ventured further into the room and settled beside you as you lay in bed, rousing you from your slumber. The bed groaned as it shifted under his weight, and he swiftly covered your mouth to prevent any outcry.

Without hesitation, he gently hushed you, his other hand tracing the contours of your cheek and collarbone with his lengthy fingers. As he did so, he rhythmically caressed your neck, humming a tune that only he knew. In response, tears welled up in your eyes, but he promptly brushed them away. His initial hand soon abandoned its position on your mouth, ascending to tenderly stroke your hair.

"Don’t touch me," You rasped, observing how the moonlight cast an ethereal glow on his body and hair while obscuring his face in darkness.

He simply shushed you again and you could hear him breathing deeply through his nose and mouth.

He sat on his knees beside you. You could hear murmurs from him about how pretty you were, and you didn't know whether he was telling you or telling himself. Your hands clench the sheets in fistfuls. You let out a whimper. You close your eyes and grit your teeth, hoping this is just another bad dream.

He keeps murmuring fantasies. You don't open your eyes. You breathe through your mouth because you can smell his cologne with your nose. It is so strong, suffocating.

You eventually open them when the anxiety is too much, and you stare at him, wide-eyed, at the ceiling above his shoulders and head, at your cute vanity and glittering gold and silver jewelry and pastel clothes. Was that why he liked you so much because you were feminine and utterly defenseless in the face of a real threat? You think of an escape plan, of running to the bathroom grabbing your razor, and screaming at the top of your lungs.

“Such a beauty you are,” He whispered in your ear, his voice still so sticky. “So cute. A doll that only belongs to me. All that’s left is for you to finally accept because I know you want to, don’t you?”

You can’t stop him.

As the silence lingers, you find yourself yielding to the role of his girlfriend. Tear stains dot your pillow and mattress, remnants of your emotional turmoil. Satoru's praises now echo within you, as you surrender to his caresses. Your gaze shifts towards the window, where a few distant stars twinkle in the sky, veiled by a cloud that drapes the crescent moon like a bridal veil.

“So good. I just knew I wouldn’t have to take more… drastic measures.”

He snaps a picture on his phone for later.

[yourdarkcherry]

Seducing Rafe Cameron || Ch. 3

Summary: You were blessed with an easy life since you were born, but it’s all threatened when your dad’s business fails and you find yourself with no prospects and no education and so your only solution is to marry rich. Who’s a better candidate than the older brother of your ex-best friend from high school? So you do everything in your power to seduce Rafe Cameron, not knowing he’s the root to all your problems.

Warnings: toxic relationship, spoiled reader, sexist elements, dark content, blackcoded reader, pregnancy, physical and emotional abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, death threats, eventual smut.

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You swear that this could’ve been the worst day of your entire life. From the start to the current moment it was all a series of unfortunate events. For some reason, you couldn’t wake up at the sound of your alarm, and you only awakened at the sound of your mother shaking you awake and asking you why you’re not attending your pilates class.

With wide eyes, you stare at your clock and find it’s displaying a 10:43 AM to you. Jumping from your bed, you rush to your bathroom with a continuous string of swear words at not attending your pilates class, or even finishing any of the errands you had to run.

The clock on your car shows 11:52 AM when you finally leave your house. You don’t even wait for the car to properly heat up and instantly begin your trip to the location Rafe sent you this morning, right after his good morning text that went ignored due to you oversleeping.

Then in your frenzy to reach the restaurant on time, you rear end someone. It was the last thing you wanted, and even when you exit the car you prepare yourself for the fight the other person would initiate. It was completely your fault, you were texting Rafe letting him know you will be late.

You inspect your car first, seeing the bumper threatening to fall any minute now, then you turn your head to the side and find the van you rear-ended was pretty damaged.

“Lady! Can’t you see where you were going?!” an irritated man comments, and it gets nearer to the back of the car to inspect the accident.

You try to put on your best sorry look, and then look at the person only to take a second look. You didn’t have to look at him three times to know who he was. With his long locks, and tan skin, then to the light blue van.

This is the man Sarah was dating, and currently dating according to what Wheezie told you last night. He recognizes you too, for some reason as he also does a look back and his eyes widen for a little.

“I’m sorry, I admit my fault I was pretty preoccupied.” you say, then move back to your car to take your phone, but when you return you’re shocked to find Sarah Cameron in the flesh, standing next to him.

You stop briefly in your tracks, taken back at seeing her for the first time in years. She looks exactly as you last seen her, you blame your complex emotions at seeing her on the fact that she looks like she’s always did, and not a single thing changed about her.

“(Y/N).” she calls your name first, you clear your throat and walk towards her and her boyfriend.

“Hello, Sarah.” you greet, and then take your gaze off her brown eyes and stare at the man, “my insurance can cover you, I’ll call them right now and let them know.” he nods, and you take a glance at Sarah one last time as you feel her stare on your face.

You turn around and dial in the insurance company number, although your phone glitches before you can call and then it vibrates as Rafe's name flashes in your phone. You don’t need to be a genius to know you weren’t late but you were very much unclassy late.

The kind of lateness that cannot be blamed on women’s vanity.

You answer immediately, and after your first “Hello?” he asks. “Is everything okay?”

“Uhm…” you cover your forehead as you look back on the accident. “Not really, rear-ended someone.” You answer honestly.

Rafe’s voice tightens with concern. “Where exactly are you right now? I need to know.”

You hesitate, glancing around at the scene. “I’m... just near the diner on Maple Street. But really, Rafe, you don’t have to come.”

“I’m coming over,” he insists. “I want to make sure you’re okay. Don’t move from where you are.”

You wince, knowing that Rafe’s presence would complicate things even more. Sarah Cameron, his disowned sister, is right here with her boyfriend. The last thing you want is for Rafe and Sarah to run into each other. “Look, I appreciate your concern, but—”

“No arguments. I’m on my way,” Rafe says firmly. “Just stay put and don’t try to handle this all on your own.”

Panic starts to set in. You know it’s a terrible idea to let Rafe come, but you also understand how stubborn he can be. “Okay, fine. But it’s really not a big deal, and I’m dealing with the insurance already. Maybe just... wait a bit before coming?”

“Just give me a few minutes, alright?” Rafe’s tone is insistent. “I’ll be there soon.”

As you hang up, you feel the weight of the situation press down on you. You glance over at Sarah and her boyfriend, trying to avoid making eye contact. This whole thing is turning into a mess you never anticipated

You take a deep breath, trying to focus on the silver lining of the situation. If Rafe shows up and helps you sort this out, he might feel useful, which you know is something he appreciates. Men often enjoy feeling like they’re making a difference, and this could be a way to turn a frustrating situation into a moment where he feels valued.

The call with the insurance company is short, you let them know of what happened abd they let you know of what to do.

When you walk closer to the van, you see Sarah lingering awkwardly close to you as she watches you take pictures of the accident. You pretend you don’t notice her while you text the pictures to the insurance company.

“So…how have you been?” she asks first.

You clear your throat, turning around to face her. “I’ve been good.” The awkward silence makes the heat of this summer feel even worse as your cheeks burn. “You?”

“I’ve been doing good too. I remember Wheezie told me that you uhm… you started this two year college in Charlotte town.” She says, shifting her weight from one leg to another.

“Yeah…the program was called hospitality excellence and etiquette.” you answer.

Her eyes widen slightly, then she tightens her lips into a tight line before she comments, “thought it was an english literature and writing program, you always did like that a whole a lot,” she then clears her throat. “You talked about it a lot back in high school.”

You nod, feeling a pang of discomfort. “Yeah, I changed direction. It seemed like a better fit.”

Sarah clears her throat, her gaze flickering between you and her boyfriend. “Well, it’s good you found something that works for you.”

Just then, your phone buzzes with a text from the insurance company: “We’ve reviewed the details and confirmed you are at fault. Please provide the contact information for the other party so we can proceed with covering the damage.”

Before you can respond, Rafe’s car pulls up, and you feel a rush of mixed emotions. You glance at Sarah, who seems equally tense, and then back at Rafe as he steps out of the car.

You manage a strained smile as you finish texting the insurance company. The weight of the awkward situation settles heavily on your shoulders. As Rafe approaches, you feel a knot tighten in your stomach.

Rafe’s eyes meet yours, and you see his expression shift from concern to confusion as he takes in the scene. Without needing any introductions, he asks, “Is everything okay?”

You try to sound calm. “Yeah. Just trying to get the insurance stuff sorted out.”

Rafe’s gaze flickers to Sarah, his tension palpable. He doesn’t need any introductions to understand the situation. Sarah’s discomfort is visible as she shifts her weight, unable to meet Rafe’s eyes. Then, Rafe steps close to inspect the accident.

When Sarah’s boyfriend comes closer, he asks, “you talk to insurance yet?”

Before you could answer him, Rafe shields your vision of the man. “Give me your phone. I need to talk to insurance,”

“Oh, yeah sure.” you hand him your phone. “But why?”

He steps so close to you, allowing you to take whiffs of his spicy cologne and the sight of his pretty blue eyes hitting the sun so perfectly. Then his voice drops lower, “I just don’t trust that pogue, maybe he saw your car and decided to break check.”

You blink at him in cluelessness, “why would he do that?”

“To take your money, of course.” Rafe answers. “But don’t worry, I’ll let insurance know how to handle it.”

He takes your phone from your palm, your fingers brushing ever so slightly but still sending shocks throughout the rest of your body nonetheless.

He starts speaking to the insurance company, his voice low and authoritative. You watch him handle the situation with a blend of relief and unease, his presence both a comfort and a complication.

Meanwhile, Sarah stands awkwardly, her gaze flicking between Rafe and the damaged van. Her boyfriend, clearly frustrated, starts to mutter under his breath, but he doesn’t press the issue further with Rafe present.

You can’t ignore the tension in the air. The silence stretches as Rafe talks on the phone, his tone firm and decisive. You can’t help but notice how effortlessly he takes control of the situation, and despite everything, you find yourself grateful for his intervention.

When Rafe finally hangs up, he hands your phone back to you, his expression serious. “I’ve given them the details and made sure they know about the potential for fraud. They’ll be in touch with you soon.”

“Fraud?!” Sarah and her boyfriend repeat in disbelief, and exchange a shocked look before Sarah steps closer to Rafe. Her hands on her hips as she glares at him, “why the fuck would there be a possibility for fraud?”

Rafe meets her gaze evenly, not backing down. “Because it’s not uncommon for people to stage accidents to make a quick buck. It’s better to be cautious and make sure everything is above board.”

Sarah’s eyes narrow, her face flushed with anger. “You don’t know that. You’re just making assumptions.”

Rafe’s tone remains calm, though there’s a hint of annoyance. “I’m just protecting (Y/N). It’s my job to ensure everything is handled properly.”

Sarah’s boyfriend, still simmering, steps forward. “Look, we don’t need any more complications. This is already a mess.”

Sarah only looks between you and Rafe with that look she used to get when she’s connecting dots in her head. You feel like you should avoid her gaze, and cower in shame should she find out. Except, you don’t.

You have nothing to feel shameful about. She did sleep with your boyfriend in high school and betrayed your trust and broke your friendship just like that. So you think she can handle the little discomfort she will get at finding out that you and her brother are dating.

Sarah looks detached, her gaze distant as she processes Rafe’s comments. She pulls her boyfriend away slightly, her voice tight with control. “Fine, we’ll discuss it. Just… (Y/N),” she calls and you look at her as she continues, “give me your number so I can contact you about it.”

Rafe shakes his head, his expression firm, “she’s not giving her number to you. I’ll give mine to your boyfriend instead. He can handle the details and get in touch with me if needed.”

Sarah’s frustration is palpable, but she holds back her retort. She gives a curt nod, accepting the compromise.

Her boyfriend takes out his phone, and Rafe quickly gives him his number. As they exchange contact information, Sarah’s eyes flicker with a mix of emotions—anger, resignation, and something else you can’t quite place.

When Sarah and her boyfriend walk to their van. Rafe looks at your car, “you cannot drive this till it gets fixed.”

“Yeah, it’s another accident asking to happen.” you answer sadly.

“It’s okay though, I’ll take it to the shop and get it fixed for you.” He said, a hand on your shoulder, his touch warm and grounding.

“Thank you, Rafe.” you tell him. A switch in your head flips, then you add, “you’re so helpful, I wouldn’t have known what to do without you.”

His eyes slightly widen, taken off-guard at your words and attitude but he doesn’t seem like he hates it. Trying to pretend that you don’t notice the effects your words had on him, you stare at the clock on your phone.

“Your lunch break ends at 1 right?” you ask, and he hums as he directs you to his car that’s parked haphazardly. You climb up to the passenger seat of his car, then buckle in your seatbelt. When he enters his car, you say, “I feel bad for wasting your lunch break.”

“You didn’t, I’m just glad to see you.” he says, and you resist the smile that’s forming on your face but you fail.

He doesn’t see you as he starts his car once again. “I have a little more than twenty five minutes left of my lunch break, so I’ll just drive you home.”

The ride back is quiet, a comfortable silence settling between the two of you. You can feel the tension from earlier slowly dissipating, replaced by a sense of calm. Rafe’s presence, while sometimes intense, has a way of grounding you. You sneak a glance at him, noticing the way his hands grip the steering wheel, his knuckles white.

Seeing Sarah must’ve affected him just as deeply as you—if not more.

You decide that not speaking about it is the best option. If he didn’t bring it up first, then you won’t utter a single word.

The memory of seeing his disowned sister and seeing your ex-best friend would be buried for now.

Thankfully, your house wasn’t that far from the accident place. As you approach your place, Rafe speaks up, breaking the silence. “You sure you’re okay? That was a lot back there.”

You nod, your eyes meeting his briefly. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just… a bit shaken up, I guess.”

Rafe pulls up into the driveway of your house and shifts the car into park. “Well, if you need anything, you know you can call me, right?”

His offer is genuine, but there’s something in the way he says it that makes your heart skip a beat. You nod again, feeling the weight of the day starting to lift. “Thanks, Rafe. I really appreciate it.”

He turns to face you fully, his expression softening, “you don’t have to thank me. I’m happy to help.”

For a moment, you both just sit there, the air between you charged with something unspoken. Then, before the moment can stretch too long, you reach for the door handle, “I should probably get inside.”

Rafe nods, he says as he’s watching you hold your purse, “I’ll check in with you later, okay? Make sure everything’s sorted out.”

You step out of the car, feeling a strange mix of emotions. Relief, gratitude, maybe even a bit of something more. Before you could close the door, you linger slightly as he watches you.

He was so helpful and reliable today, and you don’t really want to let him go just yet. You want to talk with him more, be around him. You try to pretend that it’s all for the plan, and not because of a deep want within you.

“Uhm…why…why don’t you come inside?” you ask.

His eyebrows almost raise up to his hairline comically. You look at the black leather of his seats, shyness taking over you. “I could make you a sandwich, I feel bad just for sending you to work like that.”

He opens his mouth to speak, and you fear that it’s a rejection, so you hastily interrupt him as you look at your fingers. “Something quick, I’ll take like one minute making it for you, and your break finishes in exactly twenty minutes.”

“Sure…I’d like that.” he says genuinely, and you finally look up to him to see him smiling.

He kills the engine, and then gets out of his car. You walk side by side to the door, your heart beats faster with each step.

When you reach the door, your fingers fumble slightly with the keys, but you manage to unlock it, pushing the door open and stepping inside.

“Make yourself at home,” you say, trying to sound casual, though your voice betrays a hint of nervousness.

You walk further inside to the kitchen, feeling his presence following you. As you enter the kitchen, you set your purse on the counter. Then you start gathering the things you need for a simple sandwich from the fridge, and you bring it all to the island.

He sits on one of the chairs facing the island. He looks around a little, taking in the clean kitchen then he asks, “is your mom home?”

You glance at him as you’re taking bread slices out. “Probably not, she might’ve gone out for the afternoon,” you reply, your voice a little quieter than usual as you focus on getting the sandwich together. You can feel Rafe's eyes on you, and it makes your movements slightly more deliberate, more aware of every little thing you’re doing.

He hums in response, leaning back in his chair, still watching you. “How was your pilates class?”

“Oh…I didn’t go, woke up late actually.” you answer honestly. Focusing on spreading the mayo on the other slice of bread.

Rafe’s gaze sharpens slightly as he listens to your response, though he maintains a relaxed posture in the chair. “Woke up late, huh?” His tone is casual, and you don’t think much of it as you focus on the sandwich. His eyes are still fixed on you, watching your every movement with a kind of intensity that you chalk up to concern.

“Yeah, just one of those mornings,” you say lightly, now spreading mustard on the bread. You glance up at him, catching his steady gaze, but it doesn’t faze you—if anything, it makes you feel like he’s paying attention, like he cares.

He hums again, the sound thoughtful. “You know,” he says slowly, “I could help with that. Making sure you don’t miss anything important.”

You look up at him, tilting your head in curiosity. “What do you mean?”

He leans forward slightly, resting his elbows on the island, his eyes still locked on yours. “Just thinking… I could check in on you in the mornings. Make sure you’re up and ready. We wouldn’t want you missing out on anything.”

You smile at the offer, feeling a warmth in your chest. “That’s really sweet of you, Rafe, but I think I just need a better alarm clock.”

Rafe’s lips curl into a small smile, and you take it as a sign that he’s just being his usual considerate self. “Yeah, maybe,” he says, and you hear a touch of amusement in his voice. “But, you know, I’m just a call away. For anything.”

“Thanks, Rafe,” you say, genuinely appreciating his concern. It feels good to have someone who’s so attentive, who seems to genuinely care about the little things in your life.

He watches you for a moment longer, and you assume he’s just making sure you’re okay after the stressful day you’ve had. When he finally leans back in his chair, he says, “No problem. Just looking out for you.”

You finish making the sandwich and place it on a plate, sliding it across the island to him.

“There you go,” you say, stepping back and leaning against the counter, trying to act nonchalant.

“Thanks,” he says, picking up the sandwich and taking a bite. While he’s eating you quickly take a clean cup from one of the upper cupboards, open the fridge and pour in orange juice in it. Then you slide it to him again.

You can feel him watching you as you move around the kitchen. You open the drawer and take a new ziploc bag, then head to the pantry and place in four cookies you made. You gasp as you recalled you didn’t even give him water. He watches you with curiosity as you walk once again to the drinks fridge and take a cold water bottle.

He’s halfway finished with his sandwich by the time you slide along the cookies and the water bottle to him.

“Uhm, I made those cookies…a new recipe so I’m proud of them.” You tell him while grinning as you sit next to him.

Rafe looks down at the cookies, then back at you, a smirk playing on his lips. “You didn’t have to do all this, you know,” he says, though there’s a hint of something warm in his voice, like he’s pleased by the attention.

You shrug, your grin widening. “I wanted to. You’ve been so helpful today, it’s the least I can do.”

He takes the bag of cookies, inspecting them for a moment before glancing back at you. “I’ll have to give these a try later. If they’re as good as this sandwich, I’m sure they’ll be great.” His tone is easygoing, but there’s a spark in his eyes, like he’s enjoying this little routine you’ve set up for him.

You beam at the compliment, feeling a flutter in your chest. “I hope you like them.”

“I think it’s safe to assume there will be a make-up date.” He says casually. You gulp nervously as you look away shyly. “Of course.”

“Tomorrow.” he says.

“I can’t, I have my girls' day plans with Wheezie, remember?” you say.

“Your car will be at the shop, who’s going to be taking you?” he asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Probably call an Uber—”

“No Uber.” His tone is final and assertive, but it catches you off-guard as you watch him quietly. So he adds, “if you need someone to drive you anywhere, just call me.”

You fight the urge to refuse. It would be too much of a hassle, but your mother told you many times that men love feeling helpful. So you smile and nod, “sure.” you answer softly.

“Great. I’ll drive you and Wheezie tomorrow then.” He affirms while standing up, then washes his hands in the sink. He grabs the water bottle and the cookie bag and then heads to the front door. You follow him to his car.

Even though he barely has ten minutes to drive to work, he still cranks his window down as you approach it. His smile is soft. “Thanks for the food. I’ll update you later about your car.”

You nod at his words, smiling back too. “Drive safe.”

Rafe’s smile deepens as he hears your soft reply. “I will,” he says, his tone reassuring. He watches you for a moment longer, his gaze lingering on your face like he’s memorizing every detail.

You step back as he starts the car, waving at him as he pulls out of the driveway. There’s a strange warmth in your chest as you watch his car disappear down the street, a mix of emotions you’re not entirely sure how to process. He was so insistent, so protective—it’s nice to have someone who cares that much, you tell yourself.

Out of all your candidates, you know he’s the best. He’s always been responsible.

You don’t want to believe your mother’s theories, but she’s always been right. She did tell you that Kelce is a youngest child, so he’s pretty spoiled and probably hasn’t worked a day in his life and simply would deflect all his responsibilities. Topper is an only child, he’s selfish and stubborn and most likely wouldn’t even understand why you need help in the first place.

Meanwhile Rafe, he’s the oldest brother between his siblings. He’s always knew how to be responsible—even if Ward at first claimed otherwise. You knew that Rafe is a proactive person, he wouldn’t stand still if he knew you had a problem. He would help you if he could, and if he couldn’t, he would try everything to still help.

He's the best candidate, and you would be damned if you just let go of him.

[gay-disabled-characters-showdown]

LBGTQ+ Disabled Characters Showdown Round 3, Wave 1, Poll 11

A character being totally canon LGBTQ+ and disabled was not required to be in this competition. Please check qualifications and propaganda before asking why a character is included. 

Check out the other polls in this wave and prior here.

Yoite-Nobari no Ou

Qualifications:

Heavily heavily coded relationship with another boy, canonically intersex and can be read as trans. (implied to be cafab) Suffers from flashbacks, emotional dysregulation, depersonalization due to abuse and neglect. Also terminally ill and progressively loses his sight/taste/hearing and has more trouble getting around and staying awake. Super autism coded, for that matter. To me. And many of the fans actually.

Propaganda:

A very sad boy, in a story about very sad boys fighting for self determination and learning the importance of community. He's a shinobi and can kill people by manipulating their lifeforce from the inside, but he also likes sweets and baseball and mathematics and he communicates like a shy, neglected cat. He's also named after someone's cat. Extremely good character written by an aroace and x-gender author

Anything Else?:

He is the bestest boy ever and should win this tournament by a landslide if the series were more well known

Melanie King-The Magnus Archives

Qualifications:

Bisexual and blind

Gay and blind and amazing

Melanie ends up being blinded by herself in the fourth season of the Magnus Archives, and ends up in a romantic relationship with another woman in the same season

She is blind and has a girlfriend. Canon disabled and canon wlw win 👍

she has a girlfriend and is blind

She is blind and sapphic (I'm not sure if anything exactly is ever confirmed in canon, but most people refer to her as a lesbian)

Propaganda:

she’s iconic

I love her

Oh I love my horrible woman who did many things wrong but in a way I sympathize with and also enjoy because she deserves to be a hater. Anyways so Melanie's very first appearance involved her arguing with Jon and and dismissing the way the Magnus Institute takes statements, which is a very good introduction for her in my opinion because she will continue to be a hater in regards to John. Melanie got stabbed by a ghost prior to her next appearance and briefly became a meme because turns out, when you get stabbed by a ghost, you'll want to tell people about the ghost, and she did this as she was being dragged away from where this happened. Her professional credit went downhill after this. She ends up being the catalyst of a big plot point in season 2 after this statement, because she's the only one who recognizes that Not-Sasha is, in fact, not Sasha. Then it turns out she cannot catch a break because she gets shot by a ghost later, and the ghost bullet turns out to not be a good thing later on. Melanie starts working for the Magnus Institute after Elias, her to-be horrible boss, proposes the role, since her credit has gone down so much that the job opportunity is very much needed. Then she realizes that she does not like her horrible murder boss and that she is bound to the institute, she keeps trying to kill him, which honestly I think she deserved to do because he sucks and she deserves a kill count. Though he shoves the knowledge that her father, who she thought died peacefully, actually died an agonizing, drawn out death in her brain so she stops doing that afterwards. She does help to get him arrested though, even if she really wanted to murder him. After this it is noted that she, at one point, fended off horrible flesh monsters with a knife single-handedly. John ends up realizing that the ghost bullet from earlier is still in her leg, and is more over making her far more murder hungry than she would be without it. So naturally the next step is DIY, non-consentual surgery, which she, after waking up shortly after the incident with her leg frozen and her friends committing medical malpractice, naturally objects to, which leads to her scarring John and overall not trusting him or Basira nearly as much as she might have before. Then she decides to actually prioritize her mental health a bit after going through every horror imaginable by going to therapy and insisting that, due to how the way tapes work in the archives, that none of her sessions be recorded, all while being just a bit paranoid about her therapist. Then it turned out that the only way to sever herself from the eye was to simply not have sight, and she's the one character who chooses this, getting rid of her eyesight very painfully and then moving in with Georgie, who ends up being her girlfriend. She's a little less hostile towards John after this, though she does not want to be in any archives business considering everything she went through there. Then, during the Eyepocalypse, she and her girlfriend, due to her not having sight and Georgie not having fear, are unaffected, and they sort of accidentally start a cult while trying to keep other people protected. Though it does not help that Melanie lied about having a vision that the whole thing would end, since the truth is really hopeless and bleak. She meets up with John and Martin again, is involved with the discussion of how the world can be maybe saved and is ultimately one of the three main characters to make it to the end of the finale, the others being Georgie and Basira. This is just me highlighting all of the wild things she's been up to and this would have gotten even longer if I had more propaganda.

She's so cool she tries to poison her evil boss she kicks ass she was a ghost hunter and she's also managed to escape her shitty situation by blinding herself to be able to quit her evil eldritch horror archiving job and just chill w/ her gf georgie and their cat (until the evil boss she tried to poison fucks everything up for everyone but in the end she and georgie still live and are presumably as fine as they cam be after all the shit that happened)

Only Melanie can accidentally become the Blind Prophet of the Apocalypse with her literally fearless girlfriend after trying to distance herself from the Beholding. She also had a ghost bullet infected with with The Slaughter in her leg which she got because she was a ghost hunting YouTuber/paranormal investigator.

Sometimes you gotta take your eyes out to escape your shitty job. And then you and your girlfriend live as prophets (and basically accidental cult-leaders) in the apocalypse

[thepersonperson]

The Reproductive Horror of JJK Part 1 (The Loss of Bodily Autonomy)

Part 2

Notes before we start.

1) This analysis deals heavily with topics of nonconsent, grooming, abuse, reproductive manipulation, and pregnancy. Please proceed with caution.

2) This post was inspired by @hermitw

3) I will be mainly using the TCB scans for the manga because of their accessibility. 

4) Written as of JJK 265.

(Click images for captions/citations.)

Preface 

This was written with the assumption you've also read these other analyses:

Thoughts on Sukuna and Kenjaku’s relationship as of JJK 258.

Please give it a quick glance at least.

Quiet Horror

Jujutsu Kaisen is a unique piece of horror writing to me because the most upsetting aspects rely almost entirely on implication. Immensely triggering topics such as sexual abuse and rape are never shown, only implied. I personally have difficulty consuming/cannot consume media that depicts these kinds of things graphically, which is why JJK’s framing of it intrigues me. Rather than being sent into a panic, I find myself deeply unnerved. I’ve decided to call this “quiet horror” since I don’t know how else to describe it.

The quiet horror of JJK has been there since the start—the dehumanization, the loss of autonomy, the idea someone’s body does not belong to them and therefore ok to use… It’s right there in your face starting with Yuji becoming Sukuna’s vessel. But the horror is not just that those things occur, it’s that hardly anyone recognizes this as a problem.

These insidious ideas are persistent across the narrative and accepted. And its primary victims are the female characters.

Misogyny

The fascinating thing about misogyny in JJK is how it is rarely outright depicted. Characters will talk about generational abuse spawned by it, but we never actually see it in action until Naoya. And even that is mostly implied. 

That’s how it is in real life too. When people experience overt misogyny, it’s often when they’re isolated. For example a family gathering where the men leer at girls and say horrendous things is witnessed by only those attending. If one was never around this, the only way they’re made aware of it is by a victim discussing it.

And this is exactly what happens with the Zenins.

What’s troubling about this exchange is Momo laying out everything wrong with systemic misogyny and that’s it. She offers no solution to it because she has none. Nobara is told, this is reality and you need to accept it.

Mai falls into the same defeatist trappings, angry at Maki for trying to do something about it.

You can’t really hold this against her. She’s been abused to an extent Maki wasn’t aware of and Maki is the only person Mai can lash out at without consequence.

To be clear, it is heavily implied that Naoya molested her. Some of the first words out of his mouth are him sexualizing his underage cousins. And later as a curse, he taunts Maki for being an adult with Mai. 

It’s easy to dismiss this as Naoya mocking Mai for not reaching adulthood. However, Mai has incestuous thoughts about Megumi and Maki (seeing them as her first crushes per the fanbook), which can be a very unfortunate side effect experienced by incest victims (huge content warning for the linked source). Combine that with the knowledge of Naoya’s earlier sexualization and the implication is heavy.

Mai’s abuse is not the only one framed this way. Naoya’s mother is without a face or name. The only hint of her abuse is the word いっぱい (ippai) which means many. Naoya has many older siblings who aren’t named. He is the next head before Gojo’s sealing due to his Cursed Technique (CT) being the same as his father’s. From this it can be inferred his mother was treated like livestock and used by Naobito until she produced a worthy heir. 

Rika’s character profile is included here because her story is much like Mai’s—her abuse at the hands of her father is heavily implied. Her intense dislike of older men, being aware of predatory gazes as a child, and even using that for manipulation—these are all traits child victims of sexual assault may display (huge content warning for the linked source).

It’s hard to pick up on these things unless you’re in the know. But it is there and it is consistent. …And most of the cast doesn’t do much about it. Maki and Rika are different in that regard. They react to these transgressions violently, killing their abusers (and in Maki’s case the enablers too). Neither of them are in the wrong for doing so. It’s just really sad that they had to take matters into their own hands because no one else would stop it.

Hidden in Plain Sight

The misogyny female characters experience is very subdued and never graphic. Creepy behavior towards them is never shown outright, it’s all implied. We don’t see Naoya leer at Mai, we hear him discuss her figure in her absence. (I think that’s what helps make this less triggering. We don’t have to see them be victimized.) The same cannot be said of the male characters.

Ui Ui is a character that makes most people extremely uncomfortable because the grooming he experiences is in your face, pedophilic, and incestuous. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that as a ruthless capitalist, Mei Mei exploits her brother this way for the sake of money.

Through warped affection she has convinced a child that his body belongs to her and that he is only to use it for her. 

What makes this situation go from bad to worse is that everyone around them just tolerates it. The most opposition we see to this relationship is Yuji side eyeing them. Otherwise people are more than happy to look the other way and even enable it by paying for their services.

This contradiction is especially glaring when it comes to Gojo, who very much is against the enjoyment of youth to be stolen away from his students. Why does Gojo pay for and tolerate this woman who is very clearly preying on her brother? Is it because Ui Ui seems happy with situation?

Well, I think it’s because he’s used to it too.

To acknowledge that what Mei Mei is doing as wrong and intervening would be admitting to himself that he was taken advantage of as a child. It’s not like it killed him, you know? He’s strong and he’s beautiful. Everyone wants him for his body. That’s just how things work.

In the fanbook Gege says that Gojo can never be fully honest with a woman. And that is a response to the question: “He (Gojo) seems to be aware of his own handsomeness, does he want to have a partner?”

It’s a bit concerning that Gojo is avoidant with women while having a history of them attempting to prey on him as a child. It doesn't help that in the Gojo Booklet interview, Gege reveals that Gojo would apparently be a sugar baby to someone much older than him if he didn't have to be a sorcerer.

The framing of these scenes as comedic is very uncomfortable. It’s a bit too similar to how male victims are portrayed in real life too. I’m not sure if this is intentional on Gege’s part, but regardless the result for me is horror. These terrible things are happening and nothing is being done about it.

Ui Ui and Gojo are taken advantage of by these adults because of what their bodies can do for them. This is a recurring theme in JJK not much different from how the women and girls are treated by the men of the Zenins. All of this stems from dehumanization that results in objectification. 

I’ve said before that Gojo and Sukuna are twin flames. And in this aspect they’re very similar I think. Something awful happened to Sukuna right in our faces and most of the readerbase didn’t take it seriously because he’s The Strongest and a man.

This is sexual assault point blank. A naked person forcibly put her body against Sukuna and he didn’t want that to happen. And just like everyone else, Yorozu did this because she wants Sukuna’s body for herself.

It’s framed like a joke, but the horror persists. Sukuna is going catatonic here in part because losing means entering a marriage he has no interest in. The implication here is distressing—Sukuna sees this as losing his bodily autonomy and being raped for the rest of his life. Likening that to death is understandable.

Hopefully you can see the pattern now. Sexual assault and exploitation is commonplace in JJK. It’s just subtle enough to make people vaguely uncomfortable without making them realize it’s ongoing theme. That’s the quiet horror of JJK.

The Dehumanization of Vessels

Vessels represent everything that makes my skin crawl in JJK. Someone’s body no longer belongs to themself—it’s a thing, a container that is for someone else to use. They aren’t even afforded the dignity of their name most of the time, being referred to as Someone’s Vessel by others.

Itadori Yuji

It goes without saying, Yuji’s dehumanization is the most blatant. He’s called Sukuna’s Vessel by most of the people around him and slated to be executed for the crime of existing as it. The other teenagers around his age are taught this dehumanization by those much older than him.

It’s absurd. Despite Yuji being born with and living in this body of his for 15 years, it’s suddenly not his. All because Sukuna “tainted” it.

And look at this declaration from Uraume: “Whose body do you think that is?!”

They phrase this as if it was never Yuji’s to begin with. 

On some level that is true, Kenjaku created Yuji to be the perfect cage for Sukuna. Uraume didn’t know that the time Yuji was literally bred into existence by Kenjaku to be a tool, but it’s interesting nonetheless. It’s even more interesting that Kenjaku is not the only one guilty of claiming a child’s body from birth for use by an adult. Tegen has a whole bloodline that gives them vessels for consumption.

Star Plasma Vessels

Amanai Riko is introduced as The Star Plasma Vessel while naked in a tub. Symbolically this is striking—she is a blank slate that can only be projected onto. Clothing reflects a person’s lifestyle, personality, and tastes. Riko being denied this in her introduction demonstrates her lack of autonomy. 

And just like how the Kyoto kids were groomed into dehumanizing Yuji, she is groomed into dehumanizing herself by the adults around her. It’s ok that she’s a vessel and someone else will use her body to live because it’s for the greater good.

Those aren’t her true feelings though. Deep down she wants to have her body and her life. And an adult still winds up taking that away from her. 

Isn’t it interesting how Gojo does this same song and dance to himself as The Strongest? Knowing this history and his adamancy towards Yuji’s autonomy (especially in the light novels) is all the more heart wrenching.

But this didn’t start with Yuji, it started with Riko. …on Tengen’s orders.

It’s strange that the individual taking away the lives of hand-picked young girls would be this considerate, right?

JJK never tries to frame characters as completely evil at all times. I appreciate that because it makes depictions of abuse far more realistic. We don’t see Naobito abuse his wife or enable Naoya, we see him half-drunk fighting like a pro without openly antagonizing Maki. If you didn’t know about the Zenin Clan, he’d just be a funny old man. This dichotomy is often why abuse victims aren’t believed. The people they tell only know the good side. And someone who is capable of that goodness can’t possibly be that bad. 

It’s the same way for Tengen. They’re not a creep that salivates over young girls, they’re a calm and reasonable individual who has convinced themself and many others that these actions are necessary. Yuki is the only person that calls them out for how screwed up this all is.

Before Gojo, she was The Strongest. And before Riko, she was the Star Plasma Vessel. Her body and her life was going to be given away in service to someone much older than her under the guise of a necessary evil perpetuated by religion. She rejected that and escaped her fate by becoming uncontrollably strong.

Yuki has every right to be this angry. What Tengen is doing is very messed up. All kinds of excuses and softenings are made for them, but in the end they are using the bodies of young girls to sustain themself. That’s why it’s all the more horrifying that these girls’ souls are still present and coherent enough to speak.

I really like that Yuki won’t let Tengen know what they’re saying. She’s right to assume that Tengen will just excuse whatever comes from it. However, the fact she’s this angry implies those voices aren’t anything pleasant.

Incarnation

The horror of being trapped in a body that no longer belongs to you doesn’t just exist for Tengen’s Plasma Star Vessels, it’s the very foundation of Kenjaku’s vessel incarnation. Which of them came up with this idea is first unknown. They ultimately do the same things to vessels but for very different reasons.

Incarnation works on two layers of screwed up:

1) The host’s soul is suppressed to the point where the invader cannot detect them.

2) It’s next to impossible to return them to who they were once before.

Following the quiet themes around sexual assault, this bears an uncanny resemblance to victims dealing with the aftermath of such an event. Your body no longer feels like it belongs to you, becoming invisible to those who favor the perpetrator, forever tainted after being used by another.

And following the quiet themes around misogyny, this becomes reproductive horror. A body stripped of autonomy and permanently changed after being forced to give someone else new life—Incarnation is a visceral depiction of forced pregnancies.

Pregnancy Horror (Kenjaku)

I think it’s deliberate that mothers in JJK are hardly given faces or names. That’s all a misogynistic society wants them for anyways. Their bodies are to produce someone worthwhile. A tool for those in power to use for their own ends. 

Our first introduction to this is Kamo’s mother, who despite playing a central role in his life, remains unnamed. She gives birth to a worthy heir of the Kamo Clan and is immediately discarded. 

Thankfully Kamo eventually abandons his clan in favor of supporting his mother. Learning a hard lesson from Maki, he seems to conclude that clans existing through misogynistic practices cannot be reformed into a place for women. 

And this misogyny of the Kamo Clan’s is historical. Enough for Kenjaku to take the place of Meiji-era Kamo Notoroshi to commit the most heinous sexual abuses known so far. And despite this history, the modern Kamo Notoroshi is named after him. Another awful secret known by those in power that is never fully condemned since they ultimately benefit from treating women like broodmares.

Death Painting Wombs

The Kamo Clan’s greatest sin is the coverup of Kenjaku’s actions as Kamo Notoroshi. I’ll be going much more into depth with its severity, be warned.

We’ll start with the facts. The faceless and nameless mother of Choso and his 9 brothers was raped by Kenjaku and a cursed spirit 9 times and had those fetuses aborted 9 times. 

I’ve been on about the loss of bodily autonomy so I’ll be focusing on the abortion process itself. Historical abortions were incredibly dangerous things. Though they varied by region, a lot of the methodology converges.

I will quote the favored methods in historical Japan directly from this article:

“Natural methods included drinking poisonous substances or herbal concoctions, all of which lacked a scientific basis. Many had adverse effects. Other means included acupuncture, cold water immersion, and vaginally inserting sharp objects such as burdock roots to break the amniotic sack.”

Kenjaku is someone that does not care about others’ suffering since everyone is just a thing to be played with. I doubt the victims of these experiments were offered any pain relief. Choso’s mother was made to endure one of these methods 9 times.

When Mahito feeds one of the fetuses to a man, we can see that it is slightly smaller than their palm. Here’s a helpful guide for the size of a fetus by week based on the size of a fruit.

I think a lime or lemon best represents the size and shape. A palm sized fetus is somewhere around 12–16 weeks old. Methods that involve inducing a miscarriage via ingesting medicine or poison decrease drastically after 8–12 weeks. (I’m basing this off the abortion pill that actually works.)

Kenjaku wanted to make sure the fetuses remained intact, so inducing a miscarriage by puncturing the amniotic sac to trigger labor-like contractions was most likely the chosen method. I’m not sure if Kenjaku can use Reversed Cursed Technique (RCT) on others to heal them, but that would allow for C-sections to be possible too.

It takes several weeks or months to become pregnant again after a miscarriage. Let’s standardize this as a range of 2–24 weeks. (Based on the earliest known conception at 2 weeks and the recommended conception time of 6 months.) Choso’s mother endured this without pain management 9 times.

12–16 weeks of pregnancy.

2–24 weeks for conception.

9 Times.

She endured these rapes and abortions ranging anywhere from 126–360 weeks or 2.4–6.9 years. 

I’m harping on this point because unless you know the details, this bit gets glossed over. The struggles of those who are pregnant both willingly and not are often downplayed or kept out of sight. Whatever symptoms she had for the first trimester of pregnancy (0-12 weeks) were repeated without support and knowing it was to be terminated 9 times over.

Here is a list of possible symptoms for the first trimester from the Cleveland Clinic.

Sore Breasts

Nausea: "Morning sickness is one of the telltale signs of early pregnancy. Despite its name, it can last all day and all night."

Mood Swings: "The sudden rush of hormones may put you on a rollercoaster of emotions. You may alternate between feeling anxious or scared to excited or weepy within a span of 30 minutes. It may be helpful to talk through your feelings with a friend or your partner.

Fatigue

Frequent Urination: "Your uterus begins to grow to support the pregnancy. It may begin pressing on your bladder, causing you to need to pee more often."

Acne or Other Skin Changes

Mild Shortness of Breath

I do not blame Choso for only referring to this as Kenjaku toying with his mother. The full breadth of her suffering is not something her child should have to bear.

Kenjaku repeats a similar kind of trauma for every incarnation born of a human made to swallow an object. Their bodies don’t belong to them anymore—they’re just hosts to the life of someone they never wanted to have.

To what extent the incarnated know they will be inflicting this harm on others is unknown. It’s just very uncomfortable knowing that Kenjaku created this method in a way that makes the violation of bodies mandatory. 

Tengen

This obsession with forcing pregnancies onto others does not end with incarnation or the death painting wombs. Kenjaku’s absorption of Tengen is a culmination of these experiments. 

Tengen is turned into a pregnancy. Who we’ve established to be hosting a mass of young girl’s bodies. The yonic imagery is incredibly overt for this process.

Tengen is put into a womb that resembles a vagina before becoming a fetus. Kenjaku’s Domain Expansion (DE) contains the literal decapitated heads of the pregnant. (More faceless women being used for their bodies.)

The DE name itself refers to Garbhadhatu which is the Womb Realm in Buddhism. You could translate this as all-enveloping womb.

What this symbolically means, I have no idea. There is, however, a consistent, misogynistic disregard for consent and the bodies of those who can bear children when it comes to Kenjaku. And that’s horrifying.

Sukuna 

Initially Kenjaku bears the Merger pregnancy using the stolen dead body of Geto Suguru. So even though Kenjaku consents to this pregnancy, the person whose body is being used for this doesn’t get to have a say in it.

But we already know how upsetting that is. We’ve seen how much this has pissed off Gojo Satoru who blames himself for his loved one’s defilement. What’s not being discussed in depth is Sukuna’s being inadvertently made a victim from this.

Sukuna’s fingers, a cursed object explicitly made by Kenjaku, are able to create cursed wombs. Since these fingers were created long before the death painting wombs, it appears that Kenjaku’s first attempts to birth evolved humans started with him.

Note how the finger bearers have 4 eyes, just like Sukuna.

I’ve been over why Kenjaku would target Sukuna and how Sukuna does not desire relationships or progeny and how his strength has prevented Kenjaku from forcing that on him directly. What I’m trying to draw attention to is how this appears to be the start of Kenjaku trying to workaround his boundaries without getting killed.

Knowing the extent to which Kenjaku is willing to turn others’ bodies into breeding stock makes the fact Sukuna’s fingers are essentially capable of birthing powerful curses very alarming.

Kenjaku didn’t stop there. The binding vow between them was still made to produce these cursed objects and the context of its formation is still missing. The other culling game players make it very clear Kenjaku either manipulated or tricked them into becoming cursed objects. There is not a single named character Kenjaku didn’t betray in some fashion after misleading them with false promises.

For Sukuna, Yuji being a cage instead of a vessel already indicated Kenjaku was not being honest with him. I think there’s more to it than that though. The details of the Merger and what activates it are something Sukuna and Uraume do not fully understand. Kenjaku tries to explain a little bit to them, but they both shut it down.

And without knowing the full breadth or implication of their binding vow, I don’t think Sukuna expected to be forced into a pregnancy that requires birthing.

I appreciate that Sukuna falls victim to this manipulation despite being the strongest. It goes to show that anyone can experience the loss of bodily autonomy.

Itadori Jin & Kaori 

His identical twin is not spared of this reproductive manipulation either. Jin is manipulated into having a child with the corpse of his wife who is piloted by Kenjaku. But I want to take the time to give Kaori the dignity Kenjaku has denied her.

Even if Kaori wanted a child, there is no meaningful way for her to consent to this pregnancy. I’m not even sure if Jin fully understood there was someone else wearing Kaori’s body. There is a real possibility she didn’t want a child to begin with. We just don’t know since everyone except her gets to discuss it.

She’s exactly like Choso’s mother here. Her body no longer belongs to her and she has no spoken dialogue. Her personhood is denied on introduction. What she was like or what things she aspired to is treated as irrelevant—she’s just another woman Kenjaku used and discarded like a tool.

Visceral Femininity 

Bloodborne is a game about. Well it’s a game that happens at you. There is little plot or reason to the Lovecraftian horrors that drive you and the characters mad. But when you examine the fragments of lore hidden both in plain sight and on item descriptions…you go insane.

There are patterns though. Seemingly unrelated pieces of this ethereal puzzle can be stitched together with a keen eye. Someone made a video on it and concluded it was about motherhood.

After watching this perspective, this reading seems obvious. With all the disjointed umbilical cords, births, abortions, and blood. It’s a proper reproductive horror.

To me, JJK resembles Bloodborne in that way. And after I was granted the eyes to see, I’ve noticed that this body horror has been here as early as JJK 0.

In fact JJK 0 and first chapter feature female characters being groped by curses. (Sometimes the word Geto uses for violated can be translated as rape.)

Motherhood, and everything that causes it, is something JJK uses as a vehicle to discuss the undiscussable—bodily autonomy and its loss for exploitation. Rather than presenting it as something we’re familiar with, it’s a symbolic, pervasive theme in how the bodies of others are seen as tools for those in power.

The organs and bodies of those who can become pregnant are twisted into things that inflict pain. In the case of Naoya, he quite literally becomes a cunt that torments the surviving twin of the girl he molested.

And his hand sign references a deity who manipulates bodies in the womb, changing females to males.

It’s never quite stated outright or even properly addressed by the characters, but you still feel that sickening pit. There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way things are. Why is so little being done about it?

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Part 18 with Luffy and Eri!Reader are sent to Amazon Lily together (If Reader does join him, my next request is going to be funny)

When Reader and Luffy finally land, they searched for some food, and found some mushrooms, only for them to both fall unconscious (Either from the mushrooms or actually getting something to eat after days of flying in the air)

Some of the Women were touching Reader’s horn (While she was asleep) since they’ve never seen anyone with a horn before, but they were shocked seeing the scars littered on her tiny body so they separated Reader from Luffy (They thought he was the one who hurt Reader since he’s a man) though she had to tell them he wasn’t (They didn’t believe her since he probably manipulated her)

Reader didn’t look at her brother when he didn’t have any clothes on because she was told by Sanji (After Franky joined) to never look there no matter what since it’s a big ‘No No’ area, especially if it’s a man or boy (She was confused about the ‘Jewels’)

The Amazon Women call Reader ‘Small One’ because of her age and tiny size

Reader and Luffy accidentally crashed in on Boa Hancock bathing and ran away from her, as she kept firing some heart shaped beam at them that did nothing (It didn’t affect them because Luffy isn’t attracted to Hancock and Reader’s very scared of how mean and intimidating she’s being *She’s not one to feel affection for others based on appearances, rather on personality*) even if Reader does gain affection for Hancock, her power would rewind herself from turning to stone

Reader was scared when Luffy had to fight to save the Women who helped them and tried to come in, only for Luffy to tell her to stay put as he doesn’t want her in danger

Though Reader does slowly start to like Hancock after she turned Marguerite and the others back from stone (As she also agreed with Luffy for them to be saved instead, as they’ll try to find their own way off the island)

Boa Hancock and her sisters find Kinship in Reader after learning about where her scars came from, as she got them from a ‘Bad Man’ (The Sisters develop fondness for Reader, especially since she’s still kind and sweet even after enduring such pain)

Hancock develops platonic feelings for Reader (Finding her adorable) as she felt weak to her knees when she saw Reader smile (Everyone felt weak seeing Reader’s sugary, closed eye smile)

However, Luffy and Reader both were horrified to find out Ace is being Executed! And rush over to Hancock to ask her to help them save their Brother Ace!

When Reader learns of Hancock’s ‘illness’ she pleads that if she can help then can Hancock help them! Only to her shock find out Hancock is actually okay! And feels relief knowing that ‘Miss Hancock’ is okay *She doesn’t realize Boa is in love with her Big Brother Luffy, as she thinks her illness is acting up whenever she sees her face get red and worriedly asks if she’s okay, which makes Boa’s face become even redder seeing Reader be so worried over her*)

I have the most ‘devious’ and ‘evil’ plan for the next request (It’s just chaotic and hilarious that’s centered around Eri!Reader and Boa Hancock) so when you reopen your request I hope you’ll like it (If you don’t want to do it it’s completely fine with me!)

Forgive me my dear, but I have other plans for Eri :3 and part 18 will be the Whitebeard War and the 2 Year Skip.

-“That bastard Kuma- I’m going to kill him when I see him! How could he do this to someone so young?!” you didn’t recognize the voice, they sounded angry, angry at the giant man who sent everyone away.

-You whimpered, your eyes opening and you found yourself surrounded by lots of unknown men, and tears quickly filled your eyes.

-The closest man, who had a tuft of yellow hair on top of his head, gently brushed some of the tears away, “Hey now Y/N- you’re safe now yoi. No tears.”

-You looked around, “Luffy- where’s Luffy?” they didn’t answer you, unable to because they didn’t know before you saw a giant man, one with a strange mustache peering at you over everyone else.

-He smiled down at you, “Don’t be scared Y/N.” your eyes went wide, shooting into a sitting position, you recognized that voice as your eyes softened, more tears welling, “Grandpa?”

-The men were quickly all panicking, seeing you in tears, not sure on what to do before someone shouted, “I wish Ace was here- he would know what to do!”

-You looked over at where the voice came from before you looked back up at Whitebeard, “Is Ace not here?”

-You felt fear when his look fell, looking upset, “No he’s not, he’s… Ace was captured, Y/N, by the marines, and they are wanting to execute him.” He didn’t sugar coat anything, something some of his sons scolded him for as you were stunned stiff.

-You then surprised everyone, wiping your tears with the back of your hands, “We need to go save him then!” your declaration quickly had laughter filling the room as Whitehead reached down, gently comforting you, “We’re already on our way.”

-Your eyes lit up brightly, “Really?” causing several heart related issues around the room before you asked what had happened, Marco, who was sitting next to you, spoke first, “We’re hoping you could tell us first.”

-So, you told them what had happened, with having fun at the amusement park, Camie getting kidnapped, Luffy punching a funny looking man in a bubble suit and you knocking his sister off the ladder to save Camie, then Kuma came and blasted everyone away.

-Whitebeard nodded softly, “That’s what we thought. You landed here on our ship in a paw print shaped crater. Seems that Kuma bastard knew that you would be safe here.” Instantly Marco and the nurses were yelling at Whitebeard, scolding him for using such language, which was rather comical to see.

-After you were cleaned up, as you weren’t heavily injured, just a little on your hands and knees, and dirty, you were brought into the galley by Izo, so you could get something to eat.

-Vesta couldn’t help but beam, giving you another cream puff, your cheeks looking like a chipmunks, as you were the center of attention, sitting on Whitebeard’s lap.

-You then spoke up, “How did Ace get captured? Ace is super strong!” hearing your praise of Ace did warm their heart, and you noticed everyone looking sad, Marco sighed, looking down at a handkerchief that was wrapped around his wrist, one that had dried blood on it.

-They told you of Thatch, and of Teach, or Blackbeard as he’s known by now, who attacked and killed Thatch for the Devil Fruit he had managed to find, and Ace went after him in revenge. The marines had been able to catch Ace when his back was turned, thanks to Blackbeard, knocking him back into their grasp.

-You were holding Marco’s hand, looking at the handkerchief, tears in your eyes, “Was Thatch nice? Was he a good big brother too?” Marco smiled gently at you, reaching up to brush a tear from your cheek, “He was- he was a goof ball, but he made good food and was a very good person.”

-You heard all you needed to know, and your horn flared to life, holding the handkerchief, and everyone froze as Thatch reformed, using his blood, much like how you did with Bellmere.

-Seeing what you were doing, Whitebeard went to stop you, as had heard from Ace that doing this would make you sick, but within only moments, Thatch was standing there, and he gasped in deeply- like he had been holding it, as his eyes shot open, clutching at his chest, shocked.

-Everyone was stunned, seeing what you had done. You smiled warmly as Thatch looked down at you and in an instant, they all now knew why the government was after you.

-You were sweating heavily, your cheeks flushed as you smiled warmly. You would have fallen off Whitebeard’s lap, had he not caught you, and instantly everyone was panicking, seeing that you had collapsed after bringing Thatch back from the dead!!

-Whitebeard and Marco were immediately shouting out orders as Whitebeard let him take you as he could get to the infirmary faster.

-Luckily it wasn’t as bad as it looked, just a nasty fever and you had fainted, and you had the best care possible as everyone was watching over you.

-Whitebeard stood on the deck of his ship, the other ships all around him as he spoke as they all were sailing towards Marineford, telling everyone around him, who all felt the same, that they were going to get Ace back, no matter what.

[rythmicjea]

Daddikins and The Slaughter

A bit of housekeeping first. I've been agonizing on what my second entry in this series would be. I wish that I could say that I had a whole bunch of these lined up ready to post. But, all of my ideas revolve around a central theme: Two Sides of the Same Coin. So, before I get into all of those, and my break down of their romance, I want to isolate the situations where they are on the same side. Also, I made a few of the gifs in this post. They're shit. I know they're shit. Just go with them lol. And this is long. Holy hell it's long. It's longer than some of the short stories I've written.

The Opening Game

Archie

Hiram is considered to be the "main villain" of the series up through, and including Season 5. In these five seasons, the show posits that Archie is Hiram's archnemesis. Here's the thing, Archie maybe Hiram's opposite, but he's also a reflection of all of Hiram's insecurities. The biggest question is why a middle aged man would do everything he could to destroy a teenager. Hiram wasn't necessarily trying to destroy Archie himself. He was trying to destroy everything that Archie represented in himself. Archie is the character that most represents Riverdale itself in the show. Everything that the town can be. And Archie isn't afraid of being who he is no matter if he may stumble or fail along the way. To Hiram, that is unacceptable. He can't afford failure. He can't afford to make any mistakes. Everything Hiram does is to capture and destroy Riverdale as a whole because it encapsulates everything he is not. It's also why he can't condone a relationship between Archie and Veronica; because, Veronica is an extension of Hiram and Hiram can't let someone like him be involved with a person who represents everything he is not.

Jughead

Unlike Archie, who can be molded into Hiram's image, Jughead cannot. Hiram knows from the get go that he can't control him. Jughead is Hiram's opposite. Where Hiram is wealthy, Jughead is poor. Where Jughead lets morality dictate, Hiram has no scruples. There is a spot for everyone at Jughead's table, but Hiram believes that the boy shouldn't even be breathing the rarefied air that surrounds him.

For all of their differences, it's not the superficial contradictions that make Jughead an adversary. Again, unlike Archie, it's their similarities that birth the true rivalry. Hiram isn't dumb. He's incredibly cunning. Unlike Jughead, whose intelligence doesn't come from his parents, Veronica's comes from her father's. But, Jughead is a teenager and for as smart as he is, he doesn't have the life experience that Hiram does. He still holds onto an optimism that his exterior doesn't always emulate. Hiram recognizes and respects Jughead's royalty (and yes, Royalty is going to be one of my next entries); and, to take down a royal opponent you have to play a game of politics and subterfuge. This is why the matchup between Hiram and Jughead is of The Game of Kings.

Veronica

Hiram's villainy against his daughter doesn't come out immediately. He still sees her as his "little girl", "princess", and "mija" for the first few seasons. He relies too heavily on the blood between them to extract what he wants out of her and to manipulate her onto his side. As he tells Archie "fathers are forever". This... this is pure hubris. When a child cuts ties with a parent it's all "But it's your mom/dad! You only have one!" and not "Wow, what did that parent do to make their child walk away from them? How bad was it that their own child left them?"

One of the persistent jabs at Veronica's character is that she insists on telling him her plans to defeat him and then is surprised when he listens and turns the tables on her. For all of her acumen, Veronica is still a child. The main characters are still only children. They are teenagers thrust into a world of adult problems. Then, they are expected to solve all of the town's issues when it was never their job to begin with. But, Veronica, as Mrs. Burble points out is obsessed. She is obsessed with making her father proud of her. She wants all of her accomplishments to be recognized on their own merit without his interference.

Even though it takes many years, Veronica ends up severing ties with him completely. Going so far as to hire a hitman who is successful. That should tell you just how villainous Hiram Lodge was that his own daughter took such extreme measures.

The Middle Game

Hiram's True Rival(s)

The true opposition to Hiram's town domination has always been Jughead and Veronica. Sometimes separately and sometimes together. Unlike Archie, Hiram can't control or manipulate Jughead onto his side. And to an extent, he can't do the same to his daughter. He tries his best and for a brief moment, he succeeds. But, she always finds a way out of his clutches.

The Prince

There's more than one way to execute your opponent. Jughead put Hiram in a position that he never expected. For all of his underhandedness and corrupted ways, Hiram wasn't ever able to bring Jughead down to his level. Hiram buys the Riverdale Register, Jughead publishes in the Blue and Gold. When the Register becomes the Lodge Ledger, Jughead creates the Riverdale Choice. Jughead helps lead the protests on Pickens Day and then Hiram retaliates by severing the statue blaming it on the Serpents. It's when Jughead refuses to kill the article on him that Veronica's vision of her father begins to become unrepairable.

The first time Jughead meets Hiram, they speak about family. But, before Jughead can continue any meaningful dialogue, Hiram cuts him off. Hiram employs these little mind games throughout the series. Jughead might have come off as dramatic when he said that Hiram was "trying to buy [his] silence again". But, he was right. And I believe the majority of viewers knew that, even if they didn't recognize how.

Hiram realizes that for every move he makes, Jughead successfully uses the high road against him. Hiram is not a shortsighted individual. In Chapter Twenty-Nine: Primary Colors we see the trap that's been laid coming to fruition. Now, Hiram never expected Jughead to go on a hunger strike or for anyone to follow him for that matter. He asks Archie about it and Archie (oh you lovable himbo), thinks he takes Hiram off the scent.

For all of Hiram's diabolical scheming, there is one thing that sets him apart from other villains. And that is, he keeps himself incredibly composed. In fact, the first time we ever see him get angry is in the second season when Jughead first starts writing about Hiram's exploits. I think every fan remembers where he slams his hand against his desk yelling "JUGHEAD JONES!" In fact, you can probably count on one hand the amount of times Hiram actually gets angry. And if it's not him lashing out about his own insecurities, he's lashing out about Jughead.

The Knight

Jughead discovers Hiram's plan for the Southside very early on. But, he has absolutely no support. Even when he proclaims he's going on a hunger strike, his best friend laughs. Then, to his surprise, Jughead has far more support than anyone expected. And, Jughead correctly knows that it's in no one's interest to take down "a bunch of teenagers trying to save their school". So, Hiram gets Archie to do his dirty work. He pits the best pals against each other.

The knight always gets romanticized in literature, history, and in this game of black and white. But simultaneously they remember and forget the knight always makes a turn. A change of course.

Season two isn't the best season for Archie's character. There's a lot of attempts at ambiguity. He thinks he's trying to play both sides, but he isn't. Archie is always categorized as someone who is steadfast and true. He is the moral compass for the town. But with this, he lets Hiram direct that turn and it puts everyone in danger.

But, there's something I find really interesting in the costuming that you can see in this scene in particular. Whenever Jughead needs to be The Leader/The Prince the prongs of his beanie are curled outward making the famous crown more prominent.

Jughead in the shot below is acknowledging that Archie, his once white knight, is gone. He doesn't know when or where he lost him, just that he's gone. But, he accepts the sacrifice of his own piece for what he hopes will be a win in the end.

The Rook Pawn

There are several times that Hiram throws Veronica to the wolves. Far too many for a father to do to his own daughter. But, it all starts with her rebellion. At first, she wants to be part of her parents enterprise. She doesn't realize just how deeply her family is committed to this life of crime. Like Jughead, there's an innate optimism that she can change her family's legacy.

In 2x16 we see the start of Hiram's plans to sacrifice his daughter. And it's this episode that Veronica starts to realize that she is unprotected and begs for help. She realizes that she's not a backrow piece. She's a pawn. She might be her father's favorite pawn, but she is still a pawn. A piece to be maneuvered for his own gain. She lists three names, Ethel, Betty, and Jughead. Betty is her best friend who just left her high and dry as her running mate because Veronica lied to her. She put her parents first and has realized that mistake. She's known for some time that her parents are the reason why Ethel's life is in shambles and she wants to make amends. But... why Jughead?

The deification of parents in Hollywood

Like I'm a criminal too...

Why is it so important to Veronica that Jughead doesn't see her in the same light as her parents? Because she, unlike Betty and Archie, and unlike the Serpents, can see the game the two are playing. She has been witness to Jughead's hunger strike, read his articles about her father, and arbitrated the negotiations between the two kings. And, yet, she's afraid. She's afraid that she brought this blight onto the town. In season five she says that it's her fault. It's her father and she needs to be the one to fix it. Children of narcissists learn from a very young age that it's their job to regulate the emotions and behaviors of their parents. Veronica never wanted her father home. She begged her mother to find a way out from under his thumb. Her actions of trying to impress him is a tactic to regulate her home life.

In the comics, it's well known that Veronica and Jughead are classified as "Frenemies". Do you want to know a secret? *beckons you over and whispers* They date several times in the comics and there are tons of panels where Jughead is lusting over Veronica unironically. In the second episode of season two Jughead is a friend to Veronica. He gives her cliche advice because it's what worked for him and his father. Children of addicts are special. They have to make their home safe for themselves. They put a burden on their shoulders to cure their parents. Because if they can do that then they don't have to carry the weight of the responsibility of surviving anymore. Trust me when I say, that all children of addicts blame themselves for what they went through at some point in their life.

Hollywood loves to deify parents. They can't do anything wrong. And if they did then they had a good reason for it. Play some sappy music in the background and they make you forget just how horrific their actions were. Jughead, when he gives this advice to Veronica, doesn't know Hiram. He says "I won't pretend to know what lies inside your father's heart". And when he says if there's a chance that her father is trying then it's only respectful to recognize that. He doesn't say she has to meet him halfway. How much effort she wants to put into it, is for her to decide.

But when Jughead realizes who Hiram is and the extent of his control he backpedals faster than a cyclist in the Tour de France. He does everything out in the open too. He does it so Veronica can see. He fucked up by giving her bad advice. If he had known what her father was truly like he never would have said such things! He would never tell her that she was at fault for his actions. He would never say that her father's mess was hers to clean up. Because he recognizes a traumatized person, because he's been traumatized. What he would say is that he was at fault for not knowing things sooner. (Oh you sweet summer child...)

When Jughead challenges Hiram to come to the trailer park, so that the two royal lines can broker an accord, she doesn't sit with her father. Jughead doesn't sit next to her because this is not a 'both sides made mistakes' issue. This is Hiram against the Jones'. So, Veronica sits between them - like a moderator or negotiator. She doesn't fully realize it yet, but this physical separation is the beginning of a crack. It's small. But it's enough.

That's why, when she announces her candidacy for Student Body President, Jughead perks up when he hears her parents are against it. Because that means she's thinking for herself. She's acting on her own. And Jughead presses on that crack making it deeper.

So, when she says that she doesn't want Jughead to see her as a criminal, her subconscious is coming to the surface and she is recognizing the truth around her. It's a truth she doesn't want to be apart of. So while Jughead has been trying to atone for his mistake, by exposing Hiram; Veronica changing course is her way of atoning to Jughead for what she believes is her fault.

One of the most beautiful things about their interactions is that Jughead never blamed Veronica. He might have been upset with her because outwardly she was so dedicated to her family, but he never once thought that she was responsible for Hiram's actions.

When they go low, we go high... Riot Night

The Bishop

Hiram has a Bishop - Penny Peabody. And he uses her to destroy the newly crowned Prince. And this is where Jughead realizes the real game he's been playing. The entire time he believed that it was two kingpins moving those under their leadership, using their own resources, to bring the other down. It's on Riot Night that he finally sees that he's never been on the offensive. Where he entertained the possibility of Hiram and FP playing the Kings on the board, he now understands that Hiram was never on the board to begin with. And Jughead was a pawn who made it to the back row. You see, in chess, a pawn can be elevated to "Prince" if they make it to the back row of the opposing side. Jughead was someone who begrudgingly took up his mantle in the Serpents (he moved from pawn to prince to king). And Hiram used this to his advantage.

Even at the last minute Jughead still didn't figure it all out. But he did realize the one thing no one else did. When confronted, Hiram tries to deflect; but, it's what Jughead says that is the most haunting. He notes how much Hiram is spending on all of this. But it's not the amount spent - it's the worth that those he bought represents. In business, the most valuable item is that which has not been obtained. Without Jughead, the Serpents would have rolled over. There was enough heat coming down on them to make them leave. So, when Jughead says "but you couldn't buy us", what he means to say is "you couldn't buy me."

It's in this moment, when he's cornered and in check, that he realizes he was Hiram's opposition all along. Jughead knew he was a thorn. But, he believed himself to be outside of the fight. An objective observer. This realization is what inspires the counteroffer to go to the slaughter for his gang, his town, and his father. Hiram knew the only way he could ever defeat Jughead was if Jughead sacrificed himself. He used Jughead's innate goodness against him. And Penny noted it all. "The sacrificial lamb arrives..." Jughead figured that no bloodshed would follow his sacrifice, but Hiram knew that without Jughead's leadership, the Serpents would implode. Getting Jughead out of the picture was Hiram's entire goal.

Deflection, Attack, Refute, Valve, Opposition

Like all villains, Hiram has a pattern. Surprisingly, Hiram's is well known in the psychology world: DARVO.

Deny

Attack

Reverse Victim

Offender

For those who are unfamiliar with this the titles are pretty self-explanatory. But, Hiram executes these with precision. Jughead says himself that Hiram is 10 steps ahead, because he is. Knowing when a teenager is going to zig instead of zag isn't that difficult; but, making that zig look like something it's not, is.

Deflection

Hiram likes to isolate his opponent first. But during that isolation he builds you up. He appreciates what you have to offer. He loves listening to your ideas. He makes you feel welcome in his world. That's how slimy he is and it makes the skin crawl once you know this. The diabolical part of this is the "Deny" aspect. He denies his involvement because he makes his victim come up with the idea. He gives them the authority to act out their deepest and darkest desires. This is how he keeps his hands clean.

Attack

Surprisingly, his attack, looks like denial, but it's really a withdrawal. Take the Dark Circle. Archie came up with it, Hiram facilitated it, but he maneuvered behind Archie's back to take it away from him. And he did all of this, so that at the debate, Hermione could truthfully say that Archie started it. Because he did. The nuance of the situation doesn't matter.

When it comes to Jughead, his actions are far more psychological. He calls Jughead "the other one" when he introduces Archie and Jughead to the new sheriff. He does this knowing it will diminish Jughead's efforts. But, Jughead, always knowing he's underestimated takes it in stride which just further upsets Hiram.

Refute

In Veronica's case, he serves his daughter up on a silver platter to be auctioned off to the highest bidder of 'The Families'. And when she puts in the work to get her idea off of the ground, he plays the victim. He makes it seem like she is the bad guy for thinking that her efforts could be successful. Because, if she fails, what would happen to Hiram? Later he throws out that she chooses others "over blood". No, she chooses others over him. He acts like she has made the ultimate betrayal when really, he has always been the betrayer. This is especially evident at the beginning of Season Three when Hiram refuses to withdraw his attack against Archie and says that it is her "punishment" for picking "that boy over blood".

Valve

Ultimately, his goal is to make those he is attacking into the offenders. "I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those meddling kids". Sound familiar? Hiram is just a business man taking advantage of good land deals so he can elevate his project that will elevate the town. He doesn't understand why this petulant teenager is trying to stall progress! Why is he the one being vilified when everyone can prosper? His Mija is just a child! He's looking out for her and her well-being. Of course he would take the money she earned and put it in a trust. She's not old enough to understand the responsibility that comes with such a large sum. Ignoring the fact that when her would-be rapist kidnapped and tortured her boyfriend, Hiram did nothing. Instead, he's absolutely okay with Veronica selling herself for Archie's freedom.

Opposition

He doesn't send Jughead or Veronica to be slaughtered, it was done of their own volition. They decided to do that. Their choices lead them to that outcome. Except, his game of psychological warfare in the form of systematic torture and corruption of the town drove them to do it.

The End Game

Tick Tock, Daddy... Tick... Fucking... Tock...

Season five and six Jeronica is SO underrated. I know that it seems like their relationship in season seven came out of nowhere but if you don't think that they were coded from the pilot, then you have recognize that the groundwork was being laid since they all came back to Riverdale. But I argue this groundwork goes back even farther. As early as the season finale of season two.

It's Veronica who is the first to stand with Archie to save everyone from being bussed out. She wants to buy the Whyte Wyrm to save Jughead from Hiram. And when she finds out that Hiram fired FP from Pop's she realizes the "bigger, smarter play". Jughead really doesn't have that strong of a connection to the Wyrm. Yes, it's Serpents territory. Yes, it's the last piece of the southside that Hiram needs. But it's in this moment that Veronica realizes that Pop's is the Heart of Riverdale. In my analysis of Archie's dream, at the beginning of season five, I present that Jughead is Riverdale's conscience. And Veronica is the first to realize this fact. So, because her friend loves this diner, and this diner is everything to the town, she lovingly takes it over.

Hiram's deception of still owning Pop's is the first time he sacrifices Veronica. The second time is when he destroys her rum business because he can. He uses his position as Mayor to literally break the law because she beat him at his own game. So, he topples the game board. The third is when he sabotages her self-esteem by greasing her entrance into Harvard. He even tries to sacrifice her for his own good in season seven! He gets her to perjure herself with an affidavit by saying she was with him in Cuba. But, to me, what he does in Season 5 is the worst one and one he both succeeds and fails at, at the same time.

From his intro we all knew that Chad was a version of her father. The saying that "girls marry boys just like their father" exists because it's true. Chad is stalking her, harming her, defrauding her, and abusing her (love bombing is a form of abuse). Every trick that Chad employs is the same that Hiram did to Hermione. So, Veronica, innocently believing enough time had passed, goes to her father for help. And Hiram turns her away. Why does he do this? What could she have possibly done to deserve him turning his back on her? She set a boundary that she would not clean up his mess and save him when he willingly and stupidly put himself in danger because of his machismo. I repeat, as a teenager she refused to be a parent to her father. That's the reason why he won't help his daughter get out of an abusive marriage and he actively helps Chad hunt her down. This is when he succeeds at sacrificing her. Hiram fails when she successfully defends herself against Chad and eliminates the threat he poses.

Just like the end of sophomore year when Jughead almost gave his life to save everyone he loved, history repeats itself with Veronica fighting for hers against her husband and exiling Hiram.

Check...

The Heart and The Conscience...

The conscience is when the brain agrees with what the heart wants. Jughead and Veronica work separately to take her father down. They both almost die in the process. Hiram willingly sends his daughter and the rival prince to their own demise to keep his control. To quote Jess, that's some Shakespearean shit. If Veronica is Cordelia then Jughead is Hamlet. But, if they had worked together from the beginning? Archie never would have been arrested, they never would have been in danger, Veronica never would have put the hit out on her father, and Hiram would have been gone by the end of season two.

Season Three

In Season Three, Jughead investigates the Gargoyle King and he suspects it's Hiram. But he can't go after Hiram the way he did the previous year. He knows what will happen if he does. He still never comes down to Hiram's level but he's far more covert and direct than he once was. He was a pawn who elevated himself to Prince and then took up the mantle of King. This time, he knows he's on the board but instead of moving everyone else, he knows better now. He knows to make sure everyone's playing the same game.

That's why Hiram could never really affect Jughead the way he wanted. Jughead used his resources against him not wanting to get too close. But in their Junior Year, Jughead has to take a more personal approach. There's a discomfort and an anger when he does this. He can't obfuscate the fact Hiram has gotten to him, but it's far more complex than it once was.

This is the same with Veronica. The first episode has her disowning herself from her father. "You don't have a daughter anymore." She feels more inclined to manage the carnage but neither have the fortitude to do what they did the second half of their sophomore year. And they don't have the wherewithal to aid the other's help. It's why in season three we begin to see Jughead pick up the pieces from when Hiram shattered Veronica. Even when dating Archie, Veronica's only protector was Jughead. But that's for another post 😉.

...and Mate

If their dynamic with Hiram teaches us anything it's that together, Jughead and Veronica are absolutely unstoppable. For as cerebral as Jughead can be, he is the heart to Veronica's conscience. Jughead is emotional and prone to letting them cloud his judgement. It's a real and honest portrayal of the complexities of teenagerhood.

Where Jughead is emotional, Veronica is analytical. She's the embodiment of the sexism women face every day. Women can't be emotional or they won't be taken seriously. They have to work twice as hard to get half as much. Nothing, not even for a Princess, is handed to them. Veronica rarely lets her emotions get the best of her, and the first time she sheds a few tears it's Jughead's name on her lips. Not because he caused them but because she's not ready for him to see her vulnerable. She's not ready to confide in him. She's not ready to apologize for her parent's actions because she still believes it's her fault. That's why, after he's almost killed, Veronica vows to make things right. She still wants to atone.

I mean, when you break down the series finale you realize that the writers couldn't say it outright, but Jughead and Veronica became the most influential couple the world had ever seen. Name a more powerful couple than a studio president and a publishing mogul. I'll wait...

And, as always, I love feedback. Do you agree? Disagree? Let me know your thoughts!

Bisous, Bisous... Votre Auteur.

[moseslikellamas]

♱𖣂 Redfork Menace ♱𖣂 pt.17

Benjicot Blackwood x Bracken!OC

Summary - Questioning begins.

Warnings - fem!reader, suspense, adult language, period typical misogyny, condescension, adult language, feelings of shame, feelings of guilt, manipulation, benjicot brainrot, Kieran Burton fancast.

Word count - 2.3k

No idea what old timey court was like so it’s basically just based off our modern system. And we stan lawyer Martyn.

“When did you first notice someone was sneaking into your side of the borderlands?”

“It would be nearly three moons ago now.”

Shanda sat on pins and needles as the questioning started. This was where all of the real opinions would be formed. And where everyone would be trying to rip the other side apart.

“What tipped you off? You stated earlier none of the guards on duty could find proof.”

Martyn was questioning Benjicot and he was quite good at it, she thought. Martyn had always been a serious person. Stuck between her and Royce she supposed he didn’t have a choice in the matter.

“I knew they weren’t arguing over nothing. There was something happening out there, so I started looking. Tracks were covered almost perfectly but I caught sight of the crushed grass in places. After that I just had to wait and watch.”

“Anything could’ve disturbed that grass deer, your own men. It wasn’t indicative of an interloper. But let’s say, you had a feeling. Why not alert your father to the trouble?”

Benjicot was not his usual cocky, blaisè self. Which she found frustrating. He too was surprisingly stoic as he gave his response.

“As heir to Raventree, I’m entrusted to handle several duties. One of which was finding and fixing the continued guard problem in the borderlands. There was no need to trouble him with the issue until I had apprehended the criminal.”

“Exactly my point. You knew of the issue, had the authority to end it and never did. Why did you not take the same actions anyone would have against an interloper on their grounds? You had the right to take their head. Why didn’t you?”

By all rights Martyn had him there.

“I saw a flash of hair in the moonlight one night waiting for them to arrive. Your sister's hair, I recognized it. Once I knew she was a lady, I couldn’t very well cut her head off could I?”

“And you couldn’t contain her? As fearsome as your reputation is, you would think a woman was easy fare for you. But then she nearly ended your life one night, isn’t that correct?”

Shanda was considering how she could make this into Martyn’s full time job. He was wasted on guard duty when he could be defending people in cases across the realm.

“She caught me unaware, setting traps all around the borderlands. Beyond that I wanted to see if she would lead me back to Stone Hedge. I had plenty of evidence but well, I couldn’t exactly go and demand her head. So I put out a written notice, warning her specifically not to return or face the consequences if she did.” He shrugged. “How she got on my side of the river didn’t concern me. A known spy was nearly in Raventree hall, so I apprehended her.”

“And then your father sentenced her to death. How does that add up with your words? You can’t chop her head off but your father can?”

“Her head sits firmly still upon her shoulders.” Benjicot sneered.

“Because we petitioned Lord Tully! Answer the question, why spare her only to turn around and sanction the same thing later?”

“I do not control my Lord father, his decisions are his own.”

***

Shanda skipped lunch, hiding out in some hidden room alone. She didn’t go back to her own room for fear of the heir showing up. The longer the trial went on the more agitated he became, even if he was doing a very good job of hiding it in public.

She thought back to the night before when he had very firmly escorted her back to her room after the fiasco in the hallway. He had looked as if he were itching for a fight and she realized it was probably the longest he’d been without one in years. He had followed her inside her room against her vehement protest. There had, of course, been no guard posted to alert.

“What do you want? Or are you just hoping a guard will wander by to see you in here and report it to the masses? Haven’t you drugged my name through the mud enough?” She had demanded after he pushed into her room.

“I’m just keeping you company. Haven’t you been lonely?” He asked innocently while he rummaged around her room.

She had frowned at that.

“No, seeing all of the riverlands has kept me from being lonely.” Her tone was sarcastic. “What are you looking for? I didn’t bring anything with me.”

He turned to look at her before giving up his search and stalking towards her.

“It’ll be over soon enough. You should enjoy the time with your brother.” He tucked a strand of hair back from her face.

She was so tired of the back and forth. “No need, seeing as I’ll be returning home with him.”

He had just smiled down at her, his eyes sparkling.

“Try not to be so disappointed when it’s just me that takes you home.”

She’d stepped back scoffing. “Get out. I have to be up early tomorrow. Shouldn’t you be preparing yourself for questioning anyway?”

For every step she took back, he matched it forward.

“No, because I’m not being untruthful.”

“Oh what the fuck ever. All you’ve done is lie since this thing started.” She complained, her back finally hit the wall as she looked up at him annoyed.

“We both know there are several facets of the truth. You’re telling the one you think will most endear them to your cause, I’m doing the same.”

Shanda was shaken out of her reverie by a loud banging on the door. Who could it possibly be? Standing abruptly, she opened the door to see, of all people, Donal.

“Donal? How’d you know I was in here?”

Donal was a year older than Royce and a guard back at Stone Hedge. Shanda hadn’t spoken to him in a while but they’d spent many years together.

He looked at her sheepishly. “Forgive me for prying but I noticed you seem to sneak off a lot. Figured I would keep an eye out for you. Lunch is nearly over, we should go.”

If Donal knew she was sneaking off then he probably wasn’t the only one who had noticed.

“Thank you, Donal. Let’s go.”

***

The questioning after lunch was a bit above her head, as her father took over questioning Lord Samwell. She didn’t understand half of the questions her father asked and hardly any of them seemed related to the trial at hand. It wasn’t until her father made a subtle accusation about his own brother's death that any of it made sense to her. Her father was persecuting the man for decades old crimes. He didn’t even bother with the pretense of pretending to be here for her.

While Shanda did not understand the confrontation happening, the rest of the court was tuned in attentively. It just made her more upset, demonstrating that it didn’t matter what year it was or who was involved. They would always be fighting over something. All of the lords and ladies not involved would just eat the stories of atrocities up, just as bloodthirsty as them. That’s why the gods had forsaken the riverlands, careless people who played with lives like they were nothing.

She looked around the room making out familiar faces of people she hadn’t seen in years. It was sad to think they were all together again under these circumstances. She wished they were all gathered here for a hunt or maybe even a tourney. Just here to have fun and enjoy a leisurely time. They would all make jokes and sneak out at night to run through the trees. She could see that life so clearly, no resentment or quarrels besides maybe the occasional petty drama. It would be as easy as breathing and no blood would flow forth to stain them enemies.

“You killed my mother!”

The sound of Royce’s angry cry caught her attention. At some point her brother had ventured onto the floor to join her father. He looked near the verge of tears as he pointed an accusing finger at the lord. Shanda frantically met Martyn’s eyes across the room. She saw the same fear reflected back on his face that she felt. This was their worst nightmare being realized. It was a serious accusation that Royce was making and it couldn’t be backed up.

Sighing heavily, heart in her throat, Shanda stood to make her way to the floor. She felt as if she had jumped from a very tall height as she moved. She felt weightless and scared. She knew she would have to deny this crime, to side with her enemy to avoid Royce starting something he could not finish.

“That’s not true, Royce.” She said loud enough for the crowd to hear her and then she faced Lord Elmo. “We all know the facts of my mother’s death. Where she was found and by whom. Nothing there then or now has ever indicated a culprit.”

“You feel guilty because she left on an errand for you.” He spat back at her. “But I did nothing wrong and I know the Blackwoods killed her!”

“You don’t know anything little brother!” She exploded back.

If the riverlands had been locked in before, now they were practically salivating in their seats.

“You don’t have any proof.” She said quieter than before. “There’s no proof of who killed her-“

“And yet they kill our men in the disputed lands, what’s to say our mother didn’t meet the same fate?”

Shanda’s shoulders slumped, she let her eyes close for a moment. They’d been over this already. What could he possibly hope to gain by bringing it up here? If this issue progressed into its own trial she knew it would be by combat. And that her angry impulsive little brother would die. She could not let that happen, no matter how much pain he was bringing her.

“And yet the men as of late come back alive do they not brother? I stand here, alive and unharmed. Do you think that’s indicative of a people who would kill an unarmed lady on the King’s road?”

Mutters went up around the court. And Shanda felt the last chance for escape slipping out of her reach.

“You’re defending them?” Her brother turned to face her, his expression disgusted.

“I am saving you.” She whispered only for him to hear.

“I do not believe the Blackwoods were involved in the death of my mother.” She said loud enough for the court to hear.

It was pandemonium from there. Several of her brothers were up on their feet converging on her, shouting the whole time. She couldn’t hear them though, she only heard her father as he leaned in to speak.

“Pity that you were born a girl for your own sake. Lucky for your brothers.”

By then Benjicot had reached her and was escorting her out of the crowd of Brackens clustered around her, furious. The shouts were a dull thrum in the background as she heard her fathers words repeat over and over inside her mind.

What did he mean by that? Lucky that she had managed to derail Royce’s suicidal attempt to avenge their mothers name? She didn’t know but as they moved further through the crowd, she realized Benjicot was talking to her.

“-ay. Don’t worry about it. You’ve done it now though I’m sure you know that.”

He was walking so quickly he was nearly dragging her alongside him as the moved through the halls towards her room.

“What? I didn’t hear what you said. Can you slow down please?”

He didn’t listen to her at all, if anything he walked even faster. Before long they arrived at her room and he opened the door before pushing her inside. He followed behind her, shutting the door.

“You didn’t have to do that.” He said, running a hand through his hair.

She didn’t look at him as she took a seat at the table across the room. “Royce would’ve demanded a trial by combat.” Her voice was dull. “You would’ve killed him. He couldn’t even cut my head off, he’s no shot at yours.”

She wished she had a flagon of wine for once but was relieved not to have access to it. Lord Elmo had been incredibly stingy with his wine stores and she knew it was because they were all volatile enough without the spirits.

Benjicot joined her at the table, sitting across from her.

“Even though they’ll take it as a sign that the marriage idea might work?”

She rolled her eyes. “Yes I want my brother to live more than I don’t want to marry you. But only just so. Besides, who’s to say you won’t die in battle some day and save me the trouble of dealing with you.”

He laughed at that, a golden sound that lit up her insides.

“I’m not going to die anytime soon. Or have you forgotten my ‘bloodthirsty’ nature as you put it? A savage like me, I’ll die an old man.” He winked at her.

“Do you think we’ll still be doing this in another century? Killing each other and going to court to settle petty dramas?”

He reached across the table to grab her hand. “Not if I have anything to say about it. I wouldn’t be a very good husband if I started killing your family, would I? No, I want my children to have all their aunts and uncles present. Two sets of grandparents and a happy mother.”

Shanda felt warm inside as she looked into his eyes, her face burning under his stare. She pulled her hand back from him, looking away quickly.

“You should go.”

She refused to meet his eyes as he left and waited for his departure before she breathed again. She slumped against the table, lightly banging her head against it.

The riverlands were cursed.

[iamumbra195]

I want someone to write a bleach AU where Ichigo meets Rukia in his early twenties when he's a stressed out college student trying to figure out what he want to do with his life after trying to go down a medical route and not liking it but not knowing what else to do (I'm projecting so hard but we're ignoring that)

The chaotic potential of Ichigo going through his classes and having to run out randomly to deal with a hollow, of rukia attending his classes with him without formally being a student, of the chaos Kon would create

Give me architecture student Orihime that he occasionnaly talks to because of mutual friends like Tatsuki. Give me fashion design student Ishida that Ichigo doesn't recognize because he never bothered to know his classmates beyond a few here and there and Ishida definitely wasn't one of them.

Give me vet student Chad that has like three cats in his and Ichigo's shared dorm that are definitely not supposed to be there but Ichigo loves them. Rukia absolutely loves them as well.

unhinged ichigo fighting hollows the same way he used to fight those gang members in high school because he wants the adrenaline rush. He would probably get on with Shiro a little better too XD.

Ichigo, who started seeing hollows when he was like sixteen after being attacked by them. Ichigo, who has a weird little power that he doesn't quite know how to use that looks like this weird fullbring thing except without the pass so it's more of like a quincy arrow just not the usual blue colour. It's not really powerful enought to fully take out a hollow cause he doesn't know how to control it but it protects him long enough to get away

It's an interesting idea, to have him see hollows but not be strong enough to fight them the way he usually does for a long time until Rukia comes along. His attitude towards the whole thing would be a little different as well.

Also having spiritually aware Inoue, Chad, and Tatsuki but the former two don't have their powers because they haven't been fully exposed to Ichigo's leaking reiatsu when he gets his soul reaper powers.

Having Tatsuki be closer to Ichigo because of this is a nice touch too, cause now the two of them can both see spirits and Ichigo doesn't quite feel as lonely as he used. The two of them having a rekindled friendship makes me happy for some reason and idk, her just teasing Inoue for having a crush on him and like, plotting to get them together with some help from Rukia when she arrives because she likes to tease Ichigo about Orihime all the time

Oh, and her having a water style fullbring that she incorporates into her martial arts and creates something like Fishman Karate from One piece would be super cool too. She just gives me water vibes for some reason

Also, Ichigo not being teen makes him far less susceptible to manipulation from the adults in his life, more mature, and probably less forgiving— that last part is because I want Ichigo to punch Urahara for what he did to Rukia in the SS arc because I sort of hate that he was forgiven so easily like Rukia didn’t even seem to care???

That makes me so angry for some reason. Like I like Urahara’s character but it doesn’t take away from the fact that he’s a shady shit. I feel like older Ichigo would be less tolerant of his antics than teen Ichigo

Idk, it just seems like such a funny idea to me-- chaotic substitute soul reaper Ichigo + College stress and the existential crisis of trying to figure out what the fuck you wanna do with your life = hilarity

(I'm projecting so hard, someone help me, my coping mechanism for stress is escapism and I've missed like three deadlines and there's like two weeks before school starts and I haven't even gotten around to making my schedule yet, I'm dying pls)

[science-lings]

I think Tumblr ate my last one so here.

Tis your sign to ramble to thine hearts content

I've been saving these until I have thought about something in particular to ramble about so get ready,

I am obsessed with the vibe of the Wright's being born performers. Before choosing to pursue law, Phoenix was an art student, implied to either be pursuing illustration or Shakespearian theater. I like to think that part of the appeal of criminal law for him was how dramatized everything was. It's more about weaving a story that connects all the dots provided for the evidence and witness statements than about, you know, knowledge of the law. It's about plot twists and last-minute saves and becoming the sturdy pillar for your client. Phoenix only chooses cases that are so wacky and hopeless that make for excellent stories. What I'm saying is that Phoenix lives for the drama and how the courtroom turns into a stage where he has to convince everyone else of the story he's piecing together that very moment. There's just something so theatric about yelling 'objection' and slamming the desk and making some improvised quips to taunt the guy you're arguing against.

I'm also of the opinion that the whole Beanix persona was originally intended to be more of a character that Phoenix put up to get Kristoph to believe that he had given up. It's clear that it was all about hiding his true thoughts and his identity from anyone who would recognize his spikey hair and wiggly eyebrows. He deliberately stopped wearing his iconic blue and general business casual getup and you cannot tell me that there wasn't so much thought into how he started to present himself. He's known for being highly saturated and spikey and generally pretty emotionally open so this character he built is the exact opposite of all those things and it's totally on purpose.

And just like Trucy, this character performance is a coping mechanism to keep themselves safe and seemingly confident. They both smile so convincingly and refuse to let anyone know if something is wrong. They're both manipulative but not out of malice, out of need for survival. They've both been on the wrong side of public opinion and in some capacity are aware that they're in the crosshairs of someone incredibly dangerous. They can only try to keep each other safe by playing into the act that they've worked on for years.

So sure they have to hide their true feelings under a quirky guise, but also I think they would join a community theater and be so good at it. They're in musicals together, I think Phoenix can sing, and he can sing well. He was in all his school plays and got so good at projecting his voice that they didn't even need to give him a mic (me core). That's what made him so good at objecting. I think that the ace attorney stage plays should be canon in the aa universe and Phoenix should play himself and he gets Trucy to play Pearl. He accidentally has so much homoerotic tension with the guy who plays Edgeworth that the real Edgeworth gets jealous.

Phoenix should also know about a lot of technical stuff that comes with theater, so he does a lot of the setup for lights and audio for Trucy's magic shows, he helps her move props around and should be so involved because I think that would be fun.

I also think he should know enough magic that she sometimes incorporates him into the act around their friends, so she makes a card disappear and Phoenix pulls the same one out of Edgeworth's ear. I love it when they're concerningly in sync and they can basically read each other's minds. They stare at each other and have fully silent conversations.

[devilsrecreation]

Skink dynamic headcanons

Hasira and Waza:

So @spinnysocks headcanons these two are kinda like the Nne and Tano of the group. Best friends who see themselves as the most competent of the group lol. They’re very close with each other, so close they don’t even need to talk to each other sometimes cuz they know what the other is thinking. Like

“Want to catch some bugs?”

“You read my mind”

“Cool”

Also if one of them is having a bad day or if someone wrongs them, they’ll rant to the other and they’d be like “Such a jerk” or smth like Kiburi and Neema do hfhfgf

Njano and Nyororo:

I think Njano met Nyororo around the same time he met Shupavu, so they’re best friends. Although unlike with Shupavu, their friendship is strictly platonic. Whenever they’re together, Nyororo mostly enables Njano’s antics, which she finds amusing. Njano absolutely loves watching Nyororo use her tricks on someone, trying to hype everyone up even though they all know what’s about to happen. He even talks like a sports commentator afterwards like “And she’s done it again ladies and gentleskinks! Score one for Nyororo! And the crowd goes wild!”. Nobody cheers but at least it makes Nyororo laugh lol. Remember how I hc how Nyororo knows exactly what to say in any scenario? Never fails to amaze Njano

“Seriously, how does she do that?”

Shupavu and Hasira:

Although he was the last skink to agree Shupavu should be a leader when they all met, Hasira has grown to respect her and admits that she makes a great leader, even saying how she was born to be one. He’s even acted as sort of a mentor to her on a couple of occasions, giving her survival tips cuz he’s been through a lot of shit. Don’t think Shupavu doesn’t recognize his role as a babysitter cuz she’s absolutely grateful for that. She even thanks him for everything he’s done at one point, just to make sure he feels appreciated (Hasira actually smiled at that)

Nyororo and Hasira:

I feel like Hasira’s the only one not affected by Nyororo’s sweet talk jghfhf. Her manipulation tactic NEVER works on him and she doesn’t know why. She could understand if he was gay but he isn’t, he’s pan. Hasira’s secret is his experience lmao. He’s been through this shit before, he knows how it plays out. I feel like their dynamic is kinda like a tough, overprotective father and his pretty daughter (except they’re not actually related lol)

Njano and Nyeusi:

Nyeusi gets annoyed with Njano often, but they’re still good friends. They really balance each other out, with Nyeusi being the quiet, short-tempered who’s like a shadow and Njano being the colorful, happy one that does all the talking. Surprisingly, they work really well together, as Njano is able to tell what his friend is thinking.

Though Njano IS the most prone to forgetting stuff about Nyeusi, like the fact that he hates romance or that he’s even there in the first place lmao

Hasira and Nyeusi:

I’d say they’re good friends. They both bond over how annoying Njano can be (although unlike Hasira, Nyeusi actually likes him) and what kinds of things irk them.

I feel like Hasira sometimes talks about his own experiences with romantic partners and he finds himself getting a bit sentimental only to get interrupted by Nyeusi gagging or actually throwing up

Njano and Shupavu:

Oooh, what can I say for them that I haven’t already?

-Even though Njano fell first, Shupavu fell harder. He’s the light of her life and she doesn’t know what she would do without him

-They’ll defend each other no matter what. If anyone complains about Shupavu’s attitude, Njano would do nothing but talk about how awesome she is. When Kenge insults Njano and upsets him, Shupavu gives him a verbal beating

-Shupavu is usually the one to make Njano all flustered, but I like to think there was at least one time where Njano did or said something she considered attractive and she actually swooned (Njano has no clue)

Njano and Hasira:

Njano is Hasira’s LEAST favorite skink like he does not like him at ALL hghghg. He doesn’t think Njano takes his job (and life in general) very seriously with all his antics. Njano knows this and while he actually likes Hasira, he also loves annoying tf out of him out of spite, which only makes him seem more immature. They kind of have that Spongebob and Squidward dynamic, where there is a level of mutual care between the two of them but for it to come out of Hasira is uncommon

Njano and Nyata:

Oh those two share a brain cell fnfhhdhd. Their friendship is similar to that of Njano and Nyororo, except Nyata will actually join in on Njano’s antics and even has the same ideas as he does. Cue their “evil” laughter hffhhfd

Njano also made the best wingman when he found out about Nyata and Nyororo’s relationship, though he does make lighthearted jokes. Nyata doesn’t mind. She even encourages him like “I mean, where’s the lie?”

Shupavu and Nyeusi:

Based on a small scene in “The Rise of Scar”, it’s clear he’s one of the few animals that she really trusts. Not just because of his abilities, but also emotionally. He’s always there to listen whenever Shupavu wants to talk about something and has never once exposed her secrets bc he cares about her :)

Nyata and Nyororo:

Omg the girlfriends. I like to think their relationship was sort of “love at first sight” except neither of them knew it was mutual. After some pining and some encouragement from Shupavu and Njano, they decided to make it official. They tend to get super flirty with each other, trying to make the other as flustered as possible (Nyata always wins lol). Like Nyororo would hit on Nyata and Nyata would be like “What’s stopping you?~” and Nyororo surrenders.

Their friends find it adorable, others just yell at them to get a room 😭

Nyeusi and Waza:

Waza’s usually the one to calm Nyeusi down whenever he’s pissed off at something/someone, being the mediator and all. I like to think they also “train” together, meaning they put their skills to the test with each other. Nyeusi would do his best to hide somewhere and Waza would use his keen eye to try to find him. Waza always finds him :)

Nyeusi and Nyata:

Surprisingly, they did NOT like each other when they first met. Nyata would go out of her way just to piss Nyeusi off, which results in him hissing at her. But as time went on and after Nyeusi helped her escape getting eaten, the two developed a more sibling-like relationship. Nyata thinks it’s fun to annoy Nyeusi, but they’d let the world burn for each other

Njano and Waza:

Waza doesn’t mind Njano’s antics as much as the other boys so they’re pretty chill. He even keeps an open mind about it, saying how maybe Njano’s ideas won’t be so bad. They’ve worked before, right? Njano appreciates it

Though Njano still either gets told off or slapped by Waza whenever he’s bothering Hasira hfhfh. Njano gets back at him by calling out Waza’s inconvenience

The skink dynamic is what I like to call “hilariously functional”, meaning they’re by no means dysfunctional like the other Outlanders, but hilarity always ensues no matter how well they work together

[heyedora]

been rewatching she-ra and man, in the shadows of mystacor will always be one of my favourite episodes. like, top 3 material, easily.

(cw: abuse mention (via talking about the themes of it in spop)

i mean, years ago when it first came out, as someone who had recently experienced severe abuse, the line "you have no power over me anymore!" like, changed something in me, it was incredible. that entire fight sequence with her and shadow weaver at the end, where SW is using her tactics again, but this time around adora is familiar with it and fights back - it's a super inspiring scene (always makes me cry). and at the time, it was so amazing for me to see, because it's important for people to see they're not their abuse and they can overcome it, right? but this time around i realized - the reason that adora has the strength to fight back is because of her connections with other people. she's been away from the horde for awhile now, and she has the comparison of how her new friends (who haven't known her that long!) treat her, and it's their belief in her, and the fact that adora knows, without a doubt, that they love her, that helps her recognize the manipulative way that SW is speaking to her. just a great episode all around for telling people that healing is possible and each day you spend healing, you gain just that bit more power to fight back.

something else this episode does a great job with? showing the dangers of toxic positivity! the entire episode, adora is severely on edge - she can't relax, she can't sleep, she's quite literally being haunted by shadow minions (let's call those manifestations of trauma/abuse, for the sake of this post). glimmer and bow keep assuring her she's safe, and the danger can't reach her here, and they mean well, but this makes adora even more anxious. and it's because she is in danger, because SW is there, and she knows it. this is almost like, textbook what i learned in therapy - after a traumatic situation, it will take a long time before your body knows you're safe (i could go into detail about how trauma lives in your nervous system but i'll save that for another day). for adora, the threat is still there, even if other people can't see it. forcing her to relax isn't going to help anything. and through the ep, bow and glimmer slowly try to help in other ways - even when they finally let adora talk about what's worrying her (her history with SW), that helps her a bit because she can get the comfort she needs. and after listening, bow suggests trying something else, like "hitting something", because he's trying to understand how she best deals with stress. but it's not until adora faces SW - her feelings, the danger - and acknowledges that she was right, the danger was there, but! she has new skills now, and is surrounded by loved ones, and she can fight back - that's when the feeling/the shadows go away. and then, the best part!!! glimmer and bow apologize because they realize that they needed to really listen to adora and let her feel her anxiety and her feelings, not force her to ignore them and focus on other, more relaxing things. and then, after she's faced those feelings and has talked about them, she's able to admit she's tired, and she falls asleep on the beach. and when she wakes up in a panic, who's there, keeping watch over her? glimmer and bow (i literally tear up every time). because they learned what adora needs, and what adora needs is to be allowed to be scared, with her friends right by her so she feels safe being afraid. it's just a great lesson, especially for a kids show, that all your feelings are valid - even fear and anxiety.

and!!! during the fight with SW, she can't activate her sword or become she-ra - but when she decides to stand up to SW, the sword turns into a shield for the first time! because it doesn't take power to stand up for yourself. she holds that shield and defeats SW as adora. because you can do it afraid. you can face your feelings and release other people's power over you, and you don't need to be scary or offensive to do it, or even strong, you just need to have the desire to protect yourself. GOD. this show.

[itsclydebitches]

Anyone else find it odd that we got this whole table of the dead deal when, really, just Penny would have sufficed? Putting aside the fact that Neo shouldn't know half of what happened to these characters (she's reading from the same script that let Oscar know the wording of Weiss' wish), more than half of this group means nothing to Ruby:

Lionheart she met twice, the second time when he was trying to kill her and her friends. Ruby didn't even fight him personally. He dies in another room, out of sight, and last we hear of him it's through Yang's fury that Ozpin didn't rat him out as a traitor to the whole world - an anger Ruby isn't shown to disagree with.

Roman is an enemy from six Volumes ago. Though Ruby was (understandably) shocked when he was eaten in front of her, the trauma of that has had zero impact on her and, as she points out to Neo in this very scene, she recognizes that she wasn't at fault for his death.

Ruby never had a relationship with Clover. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. They might have as team leaders, but they didn't. Ruby sat with him in a truck once, not talking to him, and then she didn't fight him at the end of the Volume because he was busy dying off in the tundra. Does Ruby know he was killed pre-Fall of Atlas? She shouldn't.

Ozpin, technically speaking, isn't dead. Or rather, I should say Ozma isn't. I'd better understand the choice to have him here if we'd learned anything about Ozpin himself - meaning, Ozma's host pre-Oscar - but we haven't. More importantly, I likewise would have bought his presence if Ruby had maintained her wholesome student-teacher relationship with him (RIP I miss those days. Oh my god I miss them!! I might have to write some moreRWBY fic just to have that again 😭), but now Ozpin is just the lying manipulator she only speaks to for exposition.

Ironwood is, you know... the villain? The guy we were supposed to despise by Volume's end because he was a crazy dictator hell-bent on bombing a city? The scene even keeps his ~evil~ prosthetic arm, emphasizing that this is villain!Ironwood, not ally!Ironwood. Ruby lied to him the second they landed, said 'fuck you' over the call to Penny, sent her friends to jump him while she made a wish, and didn't look back as she dropped a city on top of him. Oh, and then Yang reminded her that only #bad people re-think their choices. So, why is he someone whose death she'd feel guilt over?

The ONLY people who make sense here are Penny and Pyrrha, with Penny taking center stage as the death Ruby just found out about. She alone would have been enough: a magical, semblance Penny who reams Ruby out for letting her die, again, too busy getting her ass kicked by Cinder to be of any use. We might have even done something interesting with Penny's sword. You know, the real one Ruby had for all of ten episode minutes before she let a bratty Prince throw it away? Give me Ruby wielding her dead friend's weapon - because clearly the show wasn't willing to commit to a Crescent Rose aversion. Just have it be lost all Volume. Why was this armorer introduced again? Shouldn't she have done something with a lost weapon?? - until fake!Penny horrifically calls her out on it. How dare you use that? How dare you use it against me? Give me an actual battle where Ruby is torn between defending herself against something she knows isn't real and flinching from hurting the friend she just lost, taking hits she would have been able to block if she was putting forth her all, a bloody, Maiden battle that goes on long enough that it makes sense when her semblance breaks.

Then, suddenly, Penny grows kind... it's okay, Ruby... if you just let go, drink the tea, we can be together again. Wouldn't that be nice?

The issue of this suicide metaphor aside, we could have gotten something legitimately impactful. Instead I'm scratching my head over this suddenly using Crescent Rose again, fiery "If you're looking for an apology, you've wasted your time!" still a prodigy, didn't fight in the last battle, didn't even walk very far Ruby collapsing because she fell from a chandelier. Meanwhile, the emotional kicker is that she's getting beat up by... people she hates? Who she barely knew? Who aren't even technically dead? Oh no, I've slashed Oscar, who I KNOW is back in Remnant, presumably safe in Vacuo. I know Ruby is at her breaking point, but the combination of 'Come fight me, Neo, I'm perfectly able to see that I'm not responsible for Roman's death!' and the lack of connection between her and 5/7s of the guilt crew really falls flat. Either give me a Ruby who illogically, but honestly believes that her presence makes everything worse - 'You're right, Neo... I could have saved Torchwick... done something, but I just sat there...' - or a Ruby who is still able to distinguish between reality and guilt... up until the copy of her newly dead friend drags her to emotional hell and back. Now that I've been able to think about it for a bit, what we got feels downright weird to me - an excuse to bring back characters/get them in the new engine, rather than any compelling reasons for why they're there.

[unsleepingtales]

your tags and « his reflection is not a safe place » i am going to attack you why would you say that…….and would you like to say more.

Oh noooo I'm being attackeddd...... Yeah I'd love to say more, this is gonna be long lmao. I've just been thinking about how mirrors play such a big part in Riz's sophomore year arc and throughout his story there's been a lot of instances where someone makes a reference to him about reflections. Baron appears in the mirror in sophomore year because they're a reflection of the things Riz is afraid to acknowledge about himself (we're gonna get canon aroace Riz someday I swear) and in the nightmare forest Riz gets trapped by mirrors showing him futures where all his loved ones find someone more important to them than him. I don't know if we have much to go off of about how Riz felt about mirrors pre-sophomore year, but I have to imagine that after spring break of sophomore year he really doesn't like them! The same way that in real life seeing your reflection can feel unreal or seeing it moving in the mirror can be startling after going through trauma, I can't see Riz not being haunted by it yk?

During the Summer of Yorb when everything's dark, I don't know how much any of them are looking in a mirror? Riz got maybe three days of trying to figure out how to be okay with his reflection before it was completely dark! And kind of a non issue! They were adventuring for months on end trying to hunt down the Night Yorb. While there is artificial light and candles and stuff like that, I imagine they were trying to conserve their resources, and how much were any of them, not even just Riz, looking in a mirror during that time? Riz gets to junior year with new bold accessory choices (and we love it) but how much was he really keeping up with his appearance over the summer? So he got a few days after spring break, and one night of being back home after the summer to try and adjust to seeing his reflection regularly, and then he's faced with another distressing reflection of himself.

We get to junior year and the first time Riz ever sees or interacts with Kipperlilly he's immediately thrown off by how much she is like him. And it's played for laughs but in the conversation later Jawbone does explicitly ask "Are you seeing something you recognize in yourself, and you maybe don't like it too much?" and Riz immediately denies it! There's been some chatter about how very few of the Bad Kids engaged directly with their foils, and I think there's a way to view that where Riz is once again avoiding his own reflection, literal or otherwise. Engaging with Kipperlilly any more than he did would mean that Riz really had to learn about her methods, and how she got her party to do what they did, and while we know Riz wouldn't go as far as Kipperlilly did, he wouldn't kill and rage-revive the other Bad Kids just to go to the same college as them, I think if he had been confronted with how Kipperlilly was manipulating her party a lot earlier in the year it would have scared him a bit and sent him down a train of thought examining how he was pressuring his friends, the way it did in Ankarna's domain.

Especially if we understand the ending as Ankarna and Cassandra reviving all of the ratgrinders except for Kipperlilly, who he killed, I think she is absolutely haunting him. Not literally as a ghost, but here's this halfling girl, she's his height, she dresses in a similarly formal manner, both intense about school, comparisons are drawn between the two of them from the moment Kipperlilly steps on screen, and she's been comparing herself to him for even longer, and Riz already had trouble looking his reflection in the eye? Kipperlilly and Baron are elbowing for space on the other side of that mirror. Riz needs to have those conversations with Fig and Kristen and get some comfort from them, and find a way to exist comfortably within himself before he can turn a bathroom light on and not jump a little bit.

[the tags being referenced]

[furiousgoldfish]

Hi - isolated anon again.

What you said about cults really surprised me, but I realized that it did apply to some degree. I've always felt a lot of relatability to cult survivors, even though I never considered myself to be one and I never understood why.

I spent a while on the internet last night and learned about something called narcassitic family dysfuntion, which is when the family dysfuntion works like a cult around the narcassitic person, typically the parent.

Like it's not a cult in the traditional sense, but the same effects of a cult happen - the isolation, manipulation, self worth issues, the world revolving around the narcassit who can do no wrong, etc.

https://www.scapegoatrecovery.com/2022/08/05/10-rules-of-families-that-scapegoat/

^ here's an article I found that summarizes pretty much what all the others did really well. I'd never heard of this type of abuse before and I was really surprising.

You are right that Im an adult, 19, and for as long as I can remember my mom always says something like "oh it's not safe out there" when I ask to go somewhere by myself, or "I would feel more comfortable if I knew where you were going/ if you didn't go" and Im not allowed to go out at night, as, being female, Im apparently going to get kidnapped/assaulted. (Even though we live somewhere really safe) (and, honestly, getting kidnapped seems like a relief). Because all the isolation was framed for my safety, I never questioned it until I got older and I really started to feel the pull of wanting to Leave. My mom still uses that same excuse. That it's for safety that she needs to know where I am all the time and I have to text her any time I go somewhere to let her know I made it/when Im going home.

I tried to talk to my therapist about the isolation and how much it bothered me, but they just told me to push harder against my mom and like. That's not how this works. I cannot win one of these arguments. Like I never have. ever. It's so hard to describe just how all consuming this is. My mom always pulls out the guilt treatment when I want to go out and I feel like Rapunzel. I know it's not normal and I hate it. But it feels like the most mild thing that's going on at home. And to be clear, I can go outside onto the property, in the backyard, whenever, but that's kind of it. Also I didn't realize that being able to go anywhere whenever is a human right. That's.... Ah.

I apologize for this word vomit, I guess I'm just trying to process this in your ask box.

I guess I was also wondering if soon, if it's okay, you'd be willing to make a post about enmeshed families? I would find that really helpful.

Also - was it you who made the post about how to identify if you're being held captive by your parents, or was that someone else, I can't remember.

Thank you for answering my ask. It was really helpful. I do really sincerly hope you have a good day, but thank you for being willing to talk with us about abuse today. I always really appreciate your thoughts.

"and, honestly, getting kidnapped seems like a relief" THAT is relatable but also a red flag, so many kids feel this, being kidnapped would be something that is provable and generally accepted as a 'very bad thing to happen to you', and it would be a huge relief just to be able to point out the cause of your suffering, opposed to the abuse you're going thru right now, that feels invisible, unprovable.

Abusive parents love acting like letting their children out of the house is 'unsafe', but what it does is simply keep children imprisoned (or even adults, in your case). The way we keep protected in this world is not by staying in forever, because that's not a decent human life, and it's inhumane. We deal with this by teaching the kids how to recognize, identify and deal with the danger. Being female in public is not a problem if you are surrounded with a community of your own, if you have a network of people that you can, at anytime, ask for help, who can get you out of sticky situations, who can watch out for your back.

Generally what most people do is just make sure that their kids can recognize and sus out dangerous people, there are guidelines and rules set in place; you don't go alone in an alley with a person you don't know, if someone gives you a bad vibe, you go and hang around your friends where you are safe, you go home before it's late and people get drunk/violent, if necessary and if you visit very unsafe places, you could even be taught to use a weapon or self-defence, in order to keep safe.

And these rules are usually only necessary at night, at locations where predators are more likely to be, at bars, places people generally get drunk or try to get you drunk. You are hardly in danger going to the convenience store, to the bank, to the beach, to a tourist attraction, to any public place in general. You are unlikely to be kidnapped unless someone would have a great financial incentive to kidnap you at this point (if your parents were so rich they could give out a ransom), and if you're taught to recognize the signs of human trafficking and just be reasonably and rightfully wary of strangers and not give them your information or details, you'd generally be safe.

I've never been in anywhere close as much danger in public as I was at home. People are seen in public and they cannot do the illegal and criminal shit they can do behind closed doors, in their own houses. People in public have to watch out, they can't abuse you as easily, and often even won't recognize you as a target unless you seem inebriated and oblivious.

I can relate a little to the 'outside is dangerous' because one of my family members kept saying that to try and stop me from doing activities outside, but this family member had the least amount of influence, and it didn't stop me. I understand when a family member who has the most amount of influence does this to you, it's a completely different story, and you're effectively trapped. But what they're doing is lying to you. You're not being kept inside in order to be safe. You're not being taught how to spot and avoid danger, and that in itself, is more dangerous. It is, in fact, exactly like Rapunzel, and you're I think, the third person I know of, who recognized themselves in that situation.

I'd love to write more about enmeshed families, but the thing is, this is not an experience I had, and I cannot possibly understand or describe how it feels. I think Jenette McCurdy, in her book 'I'm glad my mom died', describes this way better than I possibly could, so i recommend that you read the book (contact me privately if you want me to send the book to you).

And I agree with you about your therapist not understanding the situation - going against the abuser, without the means to protect yourself, will inevitably end in them realizing they're losing control over you, and they will do something insane, drastic and extremely painful to put you back in order, but you already know that, because it's likely you've already been traumatized in this way and know what to expect. Your therapist doesn't seem to understand how dangerous it is to push against the abusers without any safety (ability to get away from them before they can retaliate).

I did make that post about recognizing if you're held captive, yeah! I'm glad it was helpful. And of course I'm here to talk about abuse. If something written here can help one person clear their mind and recognize their situation, that is huge for me.

[stilesstilinski1111]

Guys I noticed somhing while rewatching and reading/writing fanfiction for stiles and his romance in Teen Wolf. Stiles doesn't get jealous. I'm not saying he doesn't have jealous feelings, he just never expresses his jealousy in any way. I'm not trying to talk bad on any fanfiction that people write woth him jealous, it just seems wrong to me when I read it. And I've realized why.

For context I'm rewatching season 4 and mostly thinking about Lydia's past relationships and Stiles' relationship with Malia.

In season 1, he seems to express jealousy against Jackson for dating lydia. But I disagree. I think Stiles has a good sense of people, and he simply hates Jackson, he's a jerk. And because of it Lydia is in a toxic relationship. Idk if he consciously recognizes that, but he cares about Lydia, he doesn't want to tell her who to like/date but he also recognizes it's not healthy for her. It's more "Lydia you can do better" not "Lydia pick me, not Jackson". For more examples of this, the behavior between Stiles and Aiden. He only expresses negative behaviour only when the twins are trying to manipulate and threaten Scott. He backs off when they work to change for the better, and never really interfered with Lydia's relationship with him.

In season one, I think he expresses his interest in Lydia more freely. When season 2+ happens he backs off on expressing interest and only works to make sure she's happy, and safe. He really only does everything he can to protect her and make sure she's happy.

Now, stiles relationship with Malia. Again I can't remember much what happens in s5 and 6, I'm rewatching it. But it seems we don't see much of Stiles side of the relationship with her. In my opinion, I think Stiles is looking out for her like he does everyone in his friend group (which even includes Derek somehow). I'm not saying he doesn't love her like that, I just think he mostly likes the fact she likes him. If you notice, Malia is the biggest instigator to any sort of physical contact. She's the protector, the big spoon, the one to sneek into his room at night, etc. And Stiles mostly just looks out for her and help her fit in. For example, he keeps the secret over father from her, and they had a falling out. I'm not saying any of things are nessisarily bad, it can even develop into a romantic relationship quite easily. I'm saying, he doesn't express the same feelings like he had with Lydia in the past. For example He would often over think gifts for her on her birthday, or be overly ecstatic over taking her to the dance. To name a few. After the two (Malia and Stiles) temporarily broke up in s4, they both struggled to communicate. Malia had every right to be upset, but they only talked things out when Scotts mom locked them in a room together. At that point, the point we're they communicated, was the point where I thought their relationship had more to it than the simple give and take it was based on before. (In all honesty I think it started out as trauma bonding an nothing more).

The only time he shows anger is when someone he cared about was in danger. Romantically, it was whenever Lydia or Malia was in danger. He only ever expressed concern for their safety, not jealousy in who they expressed interest in. Example was when he yelled at Lydia in s1 when she worried about Jackson, but Jackson was on a murder spree. He was trying to express that wounds hurt more than the person they were inflicted on. He was telling her he cared, when all she wanted to do was risk everything, even her life, for Jackson. It wasn't in jealousy of Jackson, it was fear for her safety.

What I'm trying to say is, Stiles had a low self esteem issue. I know this isn't a huge shocker.

But he probably thought he didn't deserve any romances. His romantic interest in Lydia in season1 never escalated. It only developed somewhat in later series because Lydia got cought up in Stiles' n Scott's and supernatural issues. Stiles thinks so little of himself he doesn't blame people leaving him. He'd never abandon a friend but he'd never expect more than being a decent friend from them. Stiles is too passive to make rude remarks, or passive aggressive actions on people's romantic decisions. He's too passive to try and make them stay. He's ok with people simply being friends and nothing more, because he doesn't think he should deserve more than that.

In s3 He began expressing no disappointment for his own death after he was split with the nogitsune and dying, as long as he wouldn't be the cause of his friends pain. And it broke my heart because no one told him otherwise. Well, except Scott, who tried his best to stick his neck out for stiles. Except, Stiles would die for his friends. Scott just wouldn't ever give up on his friends. And what I remember in s5 was Scott even held to his own values above his friendship. So I kinda have mixed feelings that I will not get into rn.

Stiles constantly risks his life. He constantly tries his absolute best. He always puts his friend's needs first, and will drop everything to come to their aid. And he would rather die first than witness or be the cause of their suffering or death.

I'm not really expecting anybody to go to quite that extent of extremes for stiles, I just want Stiles to get a happy ending. That's all. They kinda didnt do that. I personally have a small grudge against Lydia for only realizing how important he was only when he was gone. She would always turn to him at her lowest points, because he'd always be there for her. But then run off with someone else. He doesn't deserve that.

I just want someone to love the little idiot, and for him to realize he's worth the love. And if nothing else, learn a little self love.