#when you approach something on your own terms everything feels amazing

[powdermelonkeg]

It gets better

You're burning rice now, and the vegetables you sauté only come out half-cooked

You're almost afraid to go into the kitchen at all because that was your mother's domain, not yours

You don't want to dirty more dishes

You don't want to waste more ingredients

How does this appliance work? Where's the instructions? Why aren't they clear enough?

You can't dice tomatoes; they squish into pulp and you have to toss them

You can't make bread; it's too dense, too hard, and you can't make yourself eat it, even though you feel obligated to

You're afraid to turn the beater on, because remember last time? Where you messed up?

It gets better

Someday, you'll make your best friend a bunch of mini quiches so she has a quick breakfast whenever she wants

Someday, you'll make double servings of your favorite food from memory

Someday, you'll accidentally make gelatin that's still got heat from the last time that pan cooked peppers, and you'll learn a little more about how spice works

Someday, you'll improvise a recipe you've never even tried unaltered before, and you'll make a perfect pumpkin cheesecake

And the cookies will be a little too hard, and you'll lament not eating them as dough

And you'll forget about the half & half you asked for, and have no idea what you want to do with it

And you'll linger on your failures less and less, because that cheesecake turned out perfectly

It gets better

Keep trying

[art]

Creator Spotlight: @jijidraws

Jiji Knight is a latina pinup illustrator. Her work is overall geared toward thick ladies and dedicated to fat positivity out of a purely selfish need to create art she wished she had seen growing up. She often features sexy and soft macabre themes on vibrant or sweet colours and takes great joy in making folx feel good about themselves with her work. She holds a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Illustration and operates out of her very sunny hometown of Las Vegas.

Check out our interview with Jiji below!

Have you ever had an art block? If so, how did you overcome it?

Oh my gosh… I have art blocks all the time. My favorite way of overcoming it is by making fanart. Funnily enough, that’s something I don’t do in my own work anymore. But there are still IPs I return to that still bring joy to my heart. I love returning to drawing Sailor Moon like when I was in first grade. Or I’ll even look up the last fashion week and start drawing the fashion week outfits from the Paris or New York show. Stuff like that is what gets my creative juices flowing.

What medium have you always been intrigued by but would never use yourself?

Resin. Resin art is so stunning. People make the most amazing and beautiful sculptures using resin, and I don’t think I could ever bring myself to play with something so complicated. There are a lot of ways to cure it, and sometimes, it doesn’t cure properly…I already work with enough chaos as it is! I respect resin artists, but I don’t think I would ever touch it. I’ve admired it from a distance. There is an artist I follow who does these resin layer paintings. So they’ll paint a layer of resin, then cure it, and paint on top of the cured layer. They build up these amazing paintings using resin…I could never. Maybe one day!

What is one interaction you had with a fan of yours that has stuck with you over the years?

I still remember…It was my first and only Flame Con in New York. I had a fan come up to my booth. They didn’t say hello or that it was nice to meet me. They started to cry! They cried, and the first words out of their mouth were, “I’ve never seen myself in artwork before.” So, of course, I started to cry! So we were just crying across the table at each other. It was just one of the sweetest interactions, and it really sticks with me still to this day.

What is a recent creative project that you are proud of?

My latest collaboration with the artist Missupacey. We’ve been collaborating for two years now, and our last collaboration was for Midsummer Scream. It was two very cute clown girls, and I designed our T-shirt. It was one of the most fun projects we’ve done in a long time. We love doing collaborative work because it keeps working in the art industry fresh—being able to bounce ideas back and forth. So we do it where someone picks the color palette, and someone picks a theme. We’ll get references together, put them on a big board, and send each other sketches. It’s really nice to work with somebody else.

How has technology changed the way you approach your work?

Honestly, it changed everything. I mean, I used to draw for myself a lot. And while I still do that, I now predominantly draw for my Patrons. For a while, I was drawing for the internet. So I was drawing stuff people wanted to see in terms of plus-sized versions of characters—a plus-sized Poison Ivy or a plus-sized Sailor Moon. My Patrons have allowed me to start drawing for myself again. But technology, for a while, essentially dominated what direction I was taking with my art, so I’m grateful to take some of that power back.

If there is one thing that you want art enthusiasts to remember you by, what would it be?

Body positivity. I would love for them to remember that there is an artist making work that is making people feel good about themselves and about the way they look at themselves.

Top tips on setting up an Artist Alley booth?

Have a method of taking money, have a method of displaying your work, and have a way to take a break. I have a plastic picnic cover that costs like a dollar at any store. All I have to do is clip it to my display grates, and it covers up my entire display. I feel secure enough to take time for myself in a 10-hour workday to eat something, go to the restroom, or even take a moment to breathe and reorganize my inventory. So it’s so funny that this one-dollar piece of plastic is like the most life-saving item in my display of items.

Who on Tumblr inspires you and why?

@mayakern comes to mind. She is another body-positive artist who expanded into making body-positive clothing. She’s amazing, and just to see someone else out there promoting body positivity. Maya’s been doing it longer than I have, I believe. It feels good to know that I’m not alone. Her work is always stunning, and I love her body-positive DnD characters and the fact that she’s still plowing through the clothing industry. For example, she’s expanded from skirts to button-downs and even custom-wrap shirts. I love to see what she’s doing, and it inspires me to pursue different avenues with my own work.

Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing, Jiji! Be sure to check out their Tumblr blog over at @jijidraws.

[writteninlunarlight-years]

Please Don't Prove I'm Right

This is based on the song Please Please Please (Epic Version) - by Morgan Clae. I haven't written in a long time; my mental health has taken a significant toll not too long ago. I have been going to some consistent therapy as well as taking things slowly on my own terms. I thank my support and followers right next to me as I recover. The banners are all from @venomhound. Please reach out to them for some excellent help with the Tumblr blog. They have been a big help to me. @literallurker is their main account. Thank you everyone for bearing with me. You are all amazing. My moons~

TW: AFAB Reader, Hurt, Graphic Details of Harm, Religious Truama's, Yandere Reader for a moment

In the beginning, heaven was a breathtaking expanse of glistening white, where clouds floated like soft pillows in an endless sky. The angels above drifted gracefully among them, their laughter echoing with pure joy, and the air held an ethereal light that felt almost alive. It was a realm of boundless beauty reserved solely for God’s beloved.

But everything changed when Lucifer, once the most cherished of all angels, was cast down. The pristine clouds darkened, their softness replaced by a bitter heaviness that weighed down the heavens. The once-gleaming landscape morphed into a realm of towering structures and watchful exorcists. The loss was palpable, as if the heavens themselves mourned the fall of its brightest star.

When you first encountered Lucifer, you were just a baby angel, a mere child of the heavens. You were newly formed, wide-eyed, and full of wonder, destined to guide the three humans wandering in the paradise of Eden. You felt an unshakeable bond with him—a connection transcending mere friendship. He was your sun, your air, the essence of your existence in this perfect world. 

Lucifer was intoxicatingly brilliant, his spirit igniting something that felt sinful within you. Yet, whispers of his rumored affections for a human stirred around you. It was said that he had fallen for one of them—impossible, you thought. God’s favorite should follow divine order, untouched by earthly desires, especially for a mortal once destined for Adam and soon rejected.

As you flitted anxiously through the heavens, awaiting his return, you could feel the eyes of the other angels upon you, judgment simmering in their stares. Sera, a newly appointed Seraphim, approached her voice a gentle choir against your rummaging thoughts. 

“Y/N, you seem troubled. Is everything all right?” Her youthful features were unmarred by the weight of time, yet you could sense the unspoken warnings in her tone.

“I’m just waiting for Lucifer,” you replied, forcing a smile. “He’s never taken this long before.” 

You could hear the skepticism in her voice before you even looked up. “Y/N, he’s trouble. He doesn’t see you the way he sees that woman. His heart is blind to your devotion, lost to her instead.”

Each word struck like a dagger, stinging your eyes with tears. “No, Sera. He cares for me. He tells me everything about his adventures in Eden. He will come back for me.” Your voice trembled with hope and desperation as if your sadness could summon him.

Just then, like a flash of lightning, Lucifer burst through the gates, the embodiment of energy and life. He swooped down, wrapping you in a joyous embrace, spinning you through the clouds, laughter spilling from his lips like music. You could feel Sera’s disdain radiating from behind, but you didn’t care. In that moment, you were weightless, untouchable...his.

In an instant, he whisked you away to a secluded corner of heaven, where you could gaze down upon Eden. Confusion washed over you as you settled on a fluffy cloud, watching him pace with uncontainable excitement, his wings shimmering behind him. He was always so proud of his beautiful wings.

“Y/N! I’ve discovered how to make Father recognize the humans as equals!” he declared, his eyes alight with excitement.

“Why would you want that?” you asked, a knot tightening in your chest. “We’re different for a reason. We’re not meant to be like them.”

His face fell as he paused, the thrill evaporating. “I need them to be seen as equals so I can bring them to heaven with us! Don’t you remember everything I’ve shared? All the dreams I have?” 

The ache in your heart deepened. You wanted to forget, to lose yourself in his bright hair and vibrant blue eyes, but the thought of Adam, Eve, and Lilith standing beside you twisted like a knife, no, not beside you...beside him. Two perfect couples, it seemed.

“Of course, I remember,” you said, forcing a smile. “Please, continue.” But inside, a storm raged between your heart and mind. 

What if you could just keep him for yourself? What if you shattered his wings, leaving him grounded and broken? What if you descended into the chaos below and extinguished Lilith’s light? What if you bound him to your will, claiming him as your own?

In that moment, you felt the weight of your thoughts, and the realization stung sharper than any blade. He was meant for her, not for you. There is no way when he spoke of you to her, if he did that, she had these thoughts...were you even an angel?

A chill ran down your spine as these dark fantasies engulfed your mind, each thought more treacherous than the last. You gasped, the air thick with dread, realizing you were still with Lucifer, his presence a paradox of comfort and ongoing torment. 

He rushed to you, his fingers brushing your cheek with a heavenly and cruel tenderness. His soothing yet distant voice echoed in your ears as a haunting melody. He was perfection incarnate, and you couldn’t fathom why those mere mortals deserved even a fraction of his devotion. You were willing to sin to keep him all to yourself...

After countless attempts to gain your attention, he realized it was futile. With a gentle sweep, he lifted you into the air, his wings unfurling majestically as he flew you to your resting zone—a serene haven that now felt like a ticking clock counting down to your last moment of peace. 

If only you had known this would be your final day in his embrace, perhaps you would have listened more intently, held him tighter against the wind, and begged him to affirm that your bond was real—that his heart belonged to you, not to that woman on the surface.

But morning shattered the tranquility, a sudden onslaught of light and chaos. Angels gathered, their faces a storm of judgment as Lucifer stood before them, shackled and tormented, bound to that woman from below. 

Tears blurred your vision as the reality of betrayal washed over you. He had chosen her, and in a cruel twist of fate, you were forced to witness your shame laid bare before God and all the Angels you shared home with. 

Then came the searing pain—the molten metal of chains biting into your neck and wrists, dragging you toward the center of the circle of wrath. Confusion clouded your thoughts as you locked eyes with Sera, whose disdainful glance pierced through your confusion like a dagger.

“Y/N, DO YOU KNOW WHY YOU’VE BEEN SUMMONED HERE WITH THESE TWO TRAITORS?” The voice boomed, a thunderous echo that reverberated through your very essence. You looked past Sera to see Him—the man the Archangels called Father, his presence both majestic and terrifying. With a shaky breath, you swallowed your fear and shook your head.

“No, Father, I don’t understand. Why am I being punished?” Each word felt like a desperate plea, even as the burning sensation clawed at your skin, choking you of your right to breathe.

“Father, please! Y/N is innocent! She knew nothing of my plans; she was ill when I confided in her last night!” Lucifer’s voice, once a safe haven for your soul, now felt like salt in an open wound. The sincerity in his plea twisted your heart, revealing the depths of betrayal you had yet to fully grasp.

“Silence, Lucifer, for God speaks! The matter at hand isn’t who has wronged whom but that this angel knew of your treachery and chose to remain silent!” Your world crumbled hearing Sera’s voice. You were to fall alongside those who had deceived you, tethered to the very man who had strung you along with promises and soft whispers late in the night, now choosing to partake in those nights with Lilith instead.

“FOR YOUR PUNISHMENT, Y/N, YOU WILL BE THE JUDGE OF THE SPACE BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH. YOU WILL DETERMINE THE FATE OF SOULS, FOR YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO WALK AMONG BOTH SIDES! YOU WILL FACE ETERNAL LONELINESS AND ISOLATION FOR YOUR TRANGRESSIONS UPON HEAVEN AND EDEN!” Fear engulfed you, a suffocating darkness that threatened to consume all hope. You were to be cast into a purgatory of your own making, alone and forsaken.

“Release her shackles!” As Sera’s voice cut through the air like a blade, you felt the chains around you dissolve, yet the burn marks remained, a permanent reminder of your choices. You were thrust away from Lucifer, your heart pounding against the confines of your chest, and when your eyes finally met his, you saw the flicker of concern. It ignited a deep-seated rage within you.

Pain shot through your back like lightning as your wings began to transform from gleaming white to a deep, obsidian black. Your halo, once a radiant gold, dulled to bronze, and your skin took on a gray hue. The purity of your existence was now tainted by your one-sided love for Lucifer.

“FATHER, NO! SPARE HER!” Lucifer’s desperate cries echoed through the heavens, but they fell on deaf ears. You stood there, hollowed out, your heart aching not for the punishment before you but for the betrayal that had led you here.

As the Archangel Michael took his stance next to Lucifer, he raised his sword, poised to sever Lucifer's wings. You were forced to witness the agony of his fall. His screams of anguish faded into the abyss as the clouds beneath you crumbled, sending you spiraling into your new reality.

For years, you lingered in purgatory, a silent reaper of the soul’s passage, guiding some to Heaven’s light and casting others into the depths of Hell. With each soul that passed through your hands, your heart grew heavy with bitterness, festering into a resentment that twisted into distaste. You found yourself haunted by thoughts of Lucifer—by the life he now shared with her, the woman who claimed his heart and turned your world upside down.

Then came the day you were summoned to Heaven, tasked with presenting your report on the balance of Winners and Sinners. It was there, amid the looming towers and the changed landscape of your once home, that you first laid eyes on her—Charlie Morningstar, a living echo of Lucifer, with his fiery spirit shimmering in her every gesture.

As you sat in the grand jury meeting, the air thick with tension, you listened to the murmurs of angels discussing Lucifer and Lilith’s child. Your heart ached as you watched Charlie fight for her dreams, her passion reminiscent of his—how he had once battled for his aspirations, now he was seemingly forgotten till Charlie showed up.

Then, as if summoned by fate, Adam snapped his fingers, opening a portal to cast Charlie and her partner back to hell. Just as it threatened to close, a surge of instinct propelled you forward, a desperate need to reach him again, the man you loved, to grasp the fleeting connection you had lost. You rushed toward the portal, your heart racing, your soul crying out to see him missing you.

On the other side, Lucifer stood, his eyes wide with shock and recognition. Amidst his hand, a cold golden band sat, showing where his commitments lie. Time froze as you locked gazes, every unspoken word hanging heavy between you. He extended his hand, a lifeline reaching through the veil, but the portal snapped shut instantly, severing the moment like a blade.

Tears welled in your eyes as despair washed over you, your head drooping low as the chamber emptied around you. Sera approached her presence, a gentle reminder of all those years ago, offering solace amid your sadness.

"It's time to let go, Y/N," she murmured, her voice soft yet firm. You nodded, feeling the weight of her words settle heavily in your chest. With a trembling hand, you reached out to the wall where the portal had been, yearning for the connection that had vanished.

As Sera sighed and stepped away, you whispered, “Please, please, please prove I’m right...Please, please, please don’t bring me to tears for one more night...” 

Years of pent-up emotions, longing, and heartache surged in a wave. A soft black glow began to envelop you. It consumed you, drawing you back into the solitude that Lucifer had unwittingly gifted you—a prison of your own making. Purgatory was your new and forever home.

Instead of proving you right, Lucifer had always been a master of disappointment, a beacon of hope that burned too bright yet always flickered just out of reach. He would continue to choose her, leaving you alone in the shadows, grappling with the remnants of a love that had never truly belonged to you. Or...did it...

Thank you again, everyone, for the support; I will slowly take steps back into the community one foot at a time. I hope you enjoy my pieces and stick around for my growth <3

[im-so-normal-iswear]

Can you request a Stan/Ford (Seprate) with a younger(29-49) girlfriend who's a Mortician and absolutely obsessed with death(in an artistic way)? Fluff ofc!

Okay!

Ford/stan pines x mortician reader

Ford Pines:

Ford is fascinated by your profession as a mortician. He has a deep respect for people who can approach death with curiosity and artistry like you do. Your discussions about the work you do, the art of preserving bodies, and the beauty you see in death intrigue him beyond belief.

You often catch him asking you all sorts of questions, from technical aspects of your work to philosophical ones. He loves talking to you about your unique perspective.

"So, when you're preparing a body, do you think of it as… scientific art? Like a preservation of life, but through death?

He finds himself comforted by your openness about death, especially considering his own near death experiences.

Your view on death makes it less frightening for him, and he loves how you’ve made it feel like a natural part of life rather than something to be feared.

Ford is surprisingly soft when it comes to your more artistic expressions of death. Whether it’s photography, sketching anatomical designs, or even macabre poetry, he loves seeing the world through your eyes. He thinks it’s poetic that your job is so tied to life’s greatest mystery.

Despite his mind, Ford can be romantic in his own way. Sometimes, he’ll surprise you with small, thoughtful gifts related to your interest, from a rare antique book on embalming techniques or a sketchbook for your death-related projects.

Ford loves hearing you talk about your day, even if it’s filled with things most people would find morbid. He's already quite used to stuff in that field. You make it sound fascinating, and Ford can’t get enough of your stories.

Stan Pines:

Stan is initially a little weirded out when he finds out you’re a mortician. Death isn’t exactly something he likes to think about, and your enthusiasm for it is unexpected. But once he gets over the initial shock, he’s intrigued. Really intrigued.

"So, you work with dead people all day? That’s gotta be a hell of a conversation starter!"

He jokes about it a lot at first, but it’s his way of trying to understand. And the more you talk about it, the more he finds himself genuinely interested.

He loves how you’re not afraid of death and how you’ve made it into something artistic. Stan is all about people who aren’t afraid to live life on their own terms, and you embody that completely. He admires how you’ve taken something most people shy away from and turned it into an art form.

“You’re somethin’ special, ya know that?”

Stan’s rough around the edges, but when he sees how passionate you are about your work, he’s hooked. He may not understand everything, but he loves listening to you talk about it.

He brags about you all the time. “Yeah, my girl’s a mortician. Works with the dead, and she’s damn good at it. Not everyone can handle that kind of thing, but she’s a real pro.” He’s super proud of what you do and loves showing you off for being so unique and talented.

He’s surprisingly romantic when it comes to your art. If you have sketches or projects related to death, Stan will look at them with genuine admiration. He may not fully get it, but he’s impressed by your creativity.

“I don’t know how you come up with this stuff, but it’s pretty damn amazing.”

When he’s feeling cheeky, Stan likes to joke about death in a lighthearted way.

“So, when I kick the bucket, you’re gonna make sure I look real handsome, right?”

It’s his way of showing he’s comfortable with your work and isn’t afraid to joke about it with you.

If you ever doubt yourself or worry that your obsession with death is too much, Stan is the first to shut that down.

"You’re incredible just the way you are. If people can’t handle that, screw ‘em. I love every weird, dark, artistic part of you."

At the end of the day, Stan is just completely in love with how unique you are. He may not always get your artistic take on death, but he’s endlessly proud of you and everything you do.

"You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, y’know? Don’t ever change."

A/n: got sick again while writing these

[licorice-tea]

Seaside Rendezvous

Pairing: Vinsmoke Sanji x reader

Content: fluff, a little angst, unrequited feelings/ miscommunication, not rlly unrequited

Word Count: 0.6k

A/N: Heyyyyyy….. it’s been a while, huh? life has been busy and difficult and amazing and everything in between, but i just wanted to post something (even if i feel like it’s not my best work😓) i might be more active after like 2 weeks, but it’s also finals season rn :o anyway, miss you guys and miss writing! looking forward to getting back into tumblr, and i hope you enjoy!

It’s a clear and overwhelmingly blue sort of day. You walk along the beach, beneath a cloudless sky, which creates calm waters to push gently foaming waves onto the shoreline. They soak your feet while you amble on, shoes in one hand and a single bag of groceries in the other. And Sanji’s signature blue pinstripe shirt makes him look even more picturesque than usual- a perfect man against a perfect backdrop.

He’s less than an arms distance to your right, with at least 4 bags in each hand, plus a tote under his arm. But you feel there is no point in offering to hold a few, since he had already refused when you initially left the market. That was half an hour ago, and you’ve been merely contemplating your feelings up till now. You’ve always felt something for Sanji, it’s just hard to say what exactly. He flirts so shamelessly and often that understanding your own emotions is nearly impossible. Are they a matter of genuine affection (beyond friendship), or simply flare-ups of lust inspired by how much he seems to want you?

Even if you could know how you truly feel for Sanji, your longtime crew mate and friend, it wouldn’t matter for that very reason. If anything, it might be worse to know how real your affections for him are than it is to continue pushing them to the back of your mind silent, contemplative moments.

But Sanji makes that impossible, too.

“What’s on your mind?”

Your eyes leave the sand to meet his mirth- crinkled eyes. “Nothing, why?”

He manages to shrug beneath the weight of the groceries. “You were being quiet, that’s all.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Don’t be, dearest.”

You avert your eyes before mumbling, “Are you sure you don’t want help with those bags?”

“I don’t need help, but thank you. And,” he smiles a little brighter, “I’d hate to ever burden you, love.”

“Sanji, don’t say things like that.”

“Oh? I thought you enjoyed my terms of endearment for you.”

You shake your head no. “Not if they aren’t serious.”

Sanji’s expression turns from content, to confused, then surprised, while he slowly comes to a stop. Once you’ve notice he’s no longer walking by your side, you turn back in time to see him finally settle on a gleeful smile.

“You’d like it��� if you knew I was serious?”

“W-Well… I guess, yeah. Not that I-“

“Because I am serious about you. I always have been, really.”

Now you’re the one who’s confused. “What?”

He rushes to drop the groceries, followed by the tote bag on his shoulder, and approaches you. Sanji guides you to drop your own load, too, before taking your hands in his.

“Would you be mine?”

“Sanji, you’re being ridiculous now…”

“I’m being genuine. Why, you don’t want to?”

“Well I mean, I would if I could, but I can’t. We can’t.” You let go of his hands and pick up your shoes and singular grocery bag, then straighten up and look into his eyes. He smiles sadly, and you just smile back before walking on.

He knows you don’t mean to hurt his feelings, especially since you seem to barely believe that said feelings for you could be real or serious. But it does hurt a little. Sanji sighs as he picks up his bags. He follows you and watches your hair bounce with your steps.

For now, he’d have to be content with letting his imagination run away with thoughts of loving you.

[matchagirliris]

“Orange bmw” Hinata X reader

f!reader, timeskip,fluff, sorry for mistakes! (ft.kageyama, atsumu)

listen to “my only” by leehi for a better experience

also heads up the orange bmw is like the one in frank oceans album cover [nostaliga ultra] that’s what i based it off of

[Oneshot : after years of not speaking to your ex boyfriend due to him professionally pursuing volleyball and now you rooting from a far. A random orange bmw shows up in your driveway with a note..?]

As you sit here in your living room watching the volleyball game airing currently that your ex boyfriend hinata shoyo was playing in. I know it might sound weird but you guys ended on good terms you knew it was best to leave him due to him constantly being on the go and you wanting something more permanent you both thought it was the best to leave each other, in reality you never wanted to leave him you truly loved him he was the best boyfriend especially in highschool.

*flashback (2nd years in highschool)*

It was a warm afternoon you and sho just finished getting out of school and wanted an ice cream since summer was approaching and the days were getting hotter and being such a good girlfriend and waiting for your boyfriends practice to be done he thought he owned you ice cream. “sho you’re too fast no matter how fast or slow we get there it’s still gonna be there” you say trying to catch up to your fast boyfriend of the time “i know y/n but i feel bad for having you wait for me during practice you don’t have to you know.” he says stoping waiting for you now “you don’t have to feel sorry i always enjoy watching you play sho it’s such an experience” you say smiling taking the gingers hand. He smiles “thank you for being such a supportive girlfriend y/n” he says leaning into you “always sho.” you say kissing his cheek. As you both are sitting on the curb now with your ice creams in hand watching the sun fully set hinara turns to you “y/n what car are you going to want me to buy you when i get rich and famous for being a pro volleyball player?” you chuckle “sho your not being serious are you” he looks at you deadpanned “i’ve never been more serious about something in my life than right now. You deserve it after everything you went through/ are gonna go through with me you deserve it.” he says now with a smile kissing your forehead “i guess you’re right huh?” you say smiling back thinking how lucky you were to have such an amazing boyfriend “mmmh okay once you do get to be rich and famous pro volleyball player i want a orange bmw the old school ones” you look at him “why orange?” he asks confused. “because my favorite color is orange like your hair” you look up at his orange wavy hair blowing in the wind a faint blush on his cheeks and ears appear “deal i promise with every piece of me to give you that car deal?” he says “pink promise?” you ask. You both pink promise on it. Thinking nothing of it.

*end of flashback*

You now still sitting in your living room with a Msby black jackals jersey with none other than hinata shoyos number and name. Praying so hard for hinata to win you can see his getting tired and you hope he pulls through to win he deserves it. After watching him through a tv screen for almost a year you can’t help but wonder how he’s doing truly you miss him and know you can get in contact with him very easily but you don’t want to interrupt his flow. As the last set happens and him and miya atsumu get the last point you can’t help but get up and yell happy that he won, you’ve never been prouder than now all the hard work and effort you’ve seen him put in you know he deserve this more than anyone.

Without thinking of anything you post a story on instagram in your msby black jackals jersey congratulating the team on their victory tagging the team to show your support and appreciation for the team. Funny enough you still followed your highschool friends tsukishima, kageyama, yamaguchi and yachi they were all very dear to you and would constantly tease sho for being with you. Kageyama seeing your story surprised you still even watch hinata and supporting him and his team, he knew you did it for him and tsukishima and he appreciated it and would tell you about in when you guys would text to catch up. He ends up sending the story to hinata saying “i guess you still have your number one supporter, and congrats on the win can’t wait to crush you next time we play against each other.”

Hinata after heading home and responding to thank you texts and finally opens kageyamas. He’s shocked “is that really y/n” he thinks after all these years she’s still supporting him and rooting for him like she said “she still kept her promise.” he thinks he can’t help but admire how even more beautiful she’s gotten. he checks instagram seeing that his team account has even reposted the story he dies for a bit not knowing what to do he’s freaking out.

You’re now freaking out yourself after waking up from your nap seeing that THE msby black jackals has reposted your story “ugh remind me to go private again next time i think about posting stuff like this.” you filled with regrets but literally can’t delete it because that’s weird but now knowing millions of people and hinata are going to see your story you can’t help but want to barf at this fact.

*incoming call from tobio*

you:hello pls don’t tell me you saw it too.

tobio: i’m pretty sure everyone saw it and i sent it to him too. so.

you: ARE YOU SERIOUS TOBIO?!

tobio: what i didn’t think you’d care especially since it was for the public to see gosh be more careful you idiot

you:you’re so lucky you’re not in japan id so kick your ass you loser i hope hinata beats you next time you both play

tobio: ugh as if i’ll get you tickets to make sure you can see me win against that tangerine

you: i will not be showing my face especially not after this publicity stunt

tobio: you’re fine y/n im sure he’s freaking out himself too i mean come on his ex girlfriend still rooting for him? he’s got to feel like an ass

you: you think?

tobio: come on we both know. anyways make sure you show that much support to me too smh *he laughs* bye y/n i’ll call you when i can okay?

you:My bad i will next time king of the court *you chuckle* and end the call

*end of call*

You fall face first on your bed and turn off your phone for the night.

shoyos pov:

“I feel so stupid. y/n was always the best and still supporting me after everything i feel like such a bad person i don’t even know if i should reach out or not i feel like that’s so dumb i truly don’t know maybe i should leave it alone? what do you think tsumu?” he says as he’s eating with his friend and setter miya atsumu. “I don’t know sho i mean i don’t think reaching out is a bad thing, do you remember anything from yer guys youth that you promise her as like small favor to make her think you haven’t forgotten about her because clearly ya haven’t” the setter says as he munches on his food and that’s when it hits the ginger “orange bmw.” he says the setter looks at him with a strange face “what do you mean orange bmw hinata?” he asks confused and worried. “I promised her an orange bmw when i became a pro volleyball player in our second year in highschool that was my promise.” hinata says half smiling reminiscing that early summer day. “okay but how are you gonna do that you don’t even know how to get one or where she lives now.” atsumu says with a mouthful. “i have connections ill make it work, it’s only fair i hold up my end of my promise.” hinata responds

*end of shoyos pov*

some days later….

As you’re making lunch for yourself you hear a knock at the door. “hi is this y/n?” the man says, you look at him “yes this is she” you responded “perfect i need you to sign this as confirmation it’s mandatory especially for cars” he says and with that he walks away you run outside and follow him “wait cars?! i didn’t order a car?!” you say puzzled, the man responds and once more before getting in the truck “it was a gift notes on the car.” and drives away you look at your driveway and see an orange bmw

“no fucking way.” you stand their mouth flung open you think no it’s not possible it can’t be, could it? you walk around and inspect the car it was just like the one you and shoyo talked about. As you walk towards the front windshield you see an orange postnote

“hey you kept your promise in supporting me, let me keep my promise too. I hope you love it. let’s catch up sometime okay? take me for a ride in it?- you’re ex boyfriend and favorite volleyball player shoyo hinata.

(xxx) xxx-xxxx

the end ;)

[pinkcreamypeach]

Rainy with a touch of good

(Characters - Princess Peach, Princess Daisy, & King toadstool (Peach's father)

@bberetd @peaches2217 @maceincognito @house-of-xiii @magnas27 @keylovesstuff @supergay-64 ((Sorry for the late post 😢))

It was a dark and stormy day as the lonely princess lay alone in her bed, idly staring out at the rain. Suddenly, she heard a soft knock at her door.

"Come in," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

The door creaked open, revealing a sleep-deprived king with dark, tired eyes. His hazel irises shone dully in the dim light, his hair a mess of golden locks, and his royal robes hanging loosely about his exhausted form.

Despite her worries, the princess couldn't help but feel a twinge of happiness at the sight of her father. His warm smile brought a glimmer of light to her troubled thoughts, even though she couldn't help but notice that he looked as though he hadn't slept since her mother fell ill.

As the king approached her bed, she started playing with her fingers, her mind racing with thoughts of what the future might hold.As the storm raged on outside and the king sat by his daughter's side, the two remained in silence, each lost in their own thoughts and worries. The only sound in the room was the gentle patter of the rain against the windowpane and the occasional thunder that rumbled in the distance.

"..My little sugarplum," the King began, his voice soft but laced with concern.

"I'm sorry I haven't been there for you. You see, things have been hectic lately in the kingdom, and your mother unfortunately fell ill. It's been tough on me, trying to keep things together for the both of us. But I know you're strong. You'll get through this."

Peach looked up at her father, her face contorted with worry. She had always known her mother to be strong and active, so to see her like this came as a shock. She could see the pain and guilt in her father's eyes as he spoke, and she wanted nothing more than to put his mind at ease.

Suddenly, the sound of thunder could be heard echoing through the room, making the situation feel even more intense. The rain poured down outside, adding to the already unsettling atmosphere. Peach's grip on the bed sheets tightened as she tried to come to terms with reality.

"Papa, what's going to happen to Mom?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

The King looked down at his daughter, his heart aching for her. He longed to take away all of her pain and suffering, but he knew that wasn't possible. All he could do was be there for her, to support her and love her.

"My dear girl, let me assure you that your grandfather, the most talented sorcerer in the land, is doing everything in his power to get your mother back to full health. He has never let our family down and always rises to the occasion when the situation calls for it. He's a great man, and we're lucky to have him in our corner."

He kissed her forehead. "You may not know this, my precious Peach, but you're important to everyone, not just as a princess but first and foremost as my daughter. My flesh and blood. I may be hard on you at times, but it's only because I have high expectations for you. I know that things may not be great right now, but I promise you, they will change. I swear it."

As he spoke, the King felt the weight of responsibility on his shoulders and the weight of fear for his wife's well-being.

Before he could continue, one of his guards called to him for something important. He sighed, his heart heavy, and stood up, gently rubbing Peach's cheek. "You're growing up to be an amazing young lady," he said, his voice filled with pride. "I'm proud to have created something so beautiful with the woman I love, and I know that you'll make a fantastic queen one day."

"I love you, Papa," she whispered weakly, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I love you too, sugarplum," he said as he gently closed the door, sighing with frustration. There was so much he wanted to do for her, but he knew that his duties as a ruler and a provider often took precedence over his duty as a father. It was a weight he carried every day, one that he was often unable to shed.As he left her bedroom, he was filled with a sense of unease. He knew that she was struggling, that she was hurting.But he was called away, and he had to go. The last thing he wanted was to leave her alone, but his duties as a king demanded his attention.

She took refuge in her favorite book, a fairytale of Sleeping Beauty. She had read it twenty times in the past few months, escaping into the world of fiction to take her mind off her painful reality. But a loud knock on her window took her out of her daydreaming, and she froze in fear. Her room was high up, far from the grass, and she was unsure of what was making the sound.She hid underneath her bedsheets, trying to muffle the sounds of the storm and the unknown intruder. The thunder and the knock combined to create an unsettling atmosphere, and she was scared. She waited, holding her breath, praying that nothing bad would happen.

She shook with fear, terrified that she was being haunted. With trembling hands, she desperately prayed to herself, hoping that whatever was out there would leave her alone. She never should have taken off that necklace, she thought, a panic rising within her. Was this a punishment of some kind? Why did this have to happen to her? She had always been a good girl, she told herself, pleading for mercy.

"Hello!?, I'm freezing out here!" Feminine voice called out, another loud bang accompanied it. "I know you're in there!”

And then she heard a familiar voice, one that brought confusion.It was Princess Daisy of Sarasaland.Her eyeliner running down her cheeks, her green eyes cat-like pupils constricting in the storm. Reflecting the Lighting glows clearly. She was holding a fish in her mouth, her fangs piercing the skin, blood trickling out. Her hands were on the glass, and her wet brown skin was soaked from the rain.The sight of Daisy's bloody fangs and fogged-up window was horrifying, but Peach couldn't leave her stranded in the pouring rain.

She slowly moved to the window, wrapping the blanket even tighter around herself, and opened it for Daisy to enter.Daisy fell face-first into the floor, giving a muffled squeak and a loud grunt of annoyance.Her clothes were drenched same as her skin.

"Are you- " Peach started to ask, but Daisy cut her off, quickly getting up and flashing a thumbs up. She had a huge smile on her face, revealing her blood-stained teeth to her.

"I'm fine!" Daisy exclaimed

Peach couldn't help but panic at the sight of the bloody teeth. She quickly went to her dresser to find a towel, eventually finding a fluffy, pink towel. She came back to Daisy, wrapping it around her tightly to try to dry her off.

"Why can't I have an orange towel?" Daisy complained.

"Because I'm being generous enough to try to dry you off," Peach snapped back. "You're freezing cold, why on earth are you here? It's late, and storming! And most importantly, why are you here? I'd like an explanation now!"

Peach crossed her arms, waiting for an answer from Daisy.

Daisy rolled her eyes as she leaned down, taking a bite of her raw fish. Peach looked on in disgust as she watched the princess devour the fish right in front of her. It took two minutes for Daisy to finish her meal with a loud gulp and an even louder burp.

"You're name is Princess Peach, right? Like the fruit..?" Daisy asked, picking at her teeth with a fish rib bone. But Peach didn't have time to answer as Daisy immediately followed up with another question.

"Were your parents hungry when you were born?" she asked before flicking the bone out the window and watching it make a sharp whistle as it fell.

Peach was starting to lose her temper, her face turning red as she raised her voice. "Of course not!. Why are we talking about names?! Can you just answer my question already!”

Daisy leaned back on the floor, nuzzling into the towel and blowing strands of hair out of her face. "I wanted to be alone for once, so I snuck out," she said bluntly, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. "I found a tube, went inside it, and came across a nasty storm. But I caught a fish during it, then I saw the mushroom kingdom. I went through it and then saw your window. I would've sneaked inside, but I heard you and your father talking, so I knew you were here. And that's why I'm here."

Princess Peach's mouth slowly dropped open in shock as she listened to Daisy's story. "Wait, you went out alone?" she asked, her voice laced with concern.

"Mhm," Daisy said, as if it were no big deal.

"Don't you realize how dangerous that was? You could have been caught by our guards or caught a fever from the storm. And eating raw fish can give you anisakiasis. You know, a parasitic disease caused by ingestion of raw or improperly prepared fish, especially fresh tuna and mackerel."

Daisy looked confused. "What..?" she asked

Peach sighed, realizing that she had gone off on a tangent. "Nevermind.” Getting up to a second bed for Princess Daisy on the floor of her room. She carefully selected the pillows and blankets from her own bed to ensure that Daisy was comfortable. As Daisy watched peach make up the bed, she felt a bit awkward. Once the bed setup was finished, she eagerly went over to her floor bed and fell asleep immediately. However, to her surprise, her snoring did not disturb the mushroom princess at all. Exhausted, Peach blew out the candle in her room and then went to bed, falling into a deep sleep.

Upon waking up the next morning, she found an empty floor bed but with a note on the pillow. Peach yawned loudly, going over to pick up the note.

"Dear Princess,

I'm sorry for not being good at writing letters, so this will be short. Thank you for letting me stay here last night. Your hospitality meant a lot to me and I'm grateful for being treated so kindly. Maybe it's because I am also a princess, but it certainly made me feel better. I apologize for being a weirdo, too.As a token of gratitude, I wanted to give you a gift. Hope you slept well. You smell like flowers and your hair has an unusual vanilla fragrance.

Sincerely Daisy”

Peach couldn't help but roll her eyes and smile as she took a closer look at the letter, placing it in her fairytale book. She looked out the window at the morning sky, which was slowly becoming brighter, as if the sun was trying to break through the clouds. The clouds were turning white, and the light was shining through them. Peach decided to get everything cleaned up, but she couldn't stop thinking about the strange girl. Maybe they'd meet later, but right now, Peach had to focus on her family. She closed the door behind her and headed out, prepared to face whatever challenges came her way.

THE END

[bubybubsters]

A Distressing Solstice

a/n: For my lovely @icey--stars I hope you have a wonderful holiday and thank you to the amazing people at @acotargiftexchange for making this a thing!

w/c: 2000+

warnings: 🐱

masterlist

*****

Eris’s POV

Eris glanced in the full-body mirror one last time before taking a deep breath and praying to the Cauldron that nothing would go wrong. He was in a dark red vest that had black patterns covering a black shirt paired with black dress pants. It was the Winter Solstice and Azriel had invited him over to meet his family on good terms and to come clean about their not-so-secret secret relationship. Rhysand and Feyre had found out when catching the two lovers making out 30 minutes before a meeting. Surprisingly the High Lord and Lady had already suspected and was willing to hear them out. Lucien had also found out in a similar way, accidentally walking in on something he definitely never wanted to see again. Eris also knew Morrigan suspected because Azriel had dragged him halfway through Velaris to apologize and explain why he’d left her in the woods that day. If Mor knew, then all the females in the night court probably did as well. Really this was only for Cassian (because Amren always knows everything), the ‘poor oblivious Illyrian baby’ as Azriel liked to call him. Still, Eris’s nerves jangled nervously as he winnowed to the River House. Sparing a look at his watch, Eris realized he was fifteen minutes early. Oh well, couldn’t very well go back now… well he technically could…. Shaking the thought from his head he scanned his surroundings. Although he would deny it to the grave, the River House was as incredible as Az had told him. As he approached the house mansion, he glanced at the windows. Two silhouettes were too close to be casual. He smiled, happy for their love. Then, suddenly realizing one had giant wings, Eris froze, fearing what he was seeing. Creeping closer, he peered through the window focusing intently on the figure with wings. That same jet black hair. Oh no. It couldn’t be. Azriel would never. Eris’s face drained of all color as he saw his lover against the counter with Elain Archeron leaning forward to kiss him. Fire roared through his veins as his own heart broke at the sight and he thought of how devastated Lucien would be. Using every scrap of self control to not smash through the window and beat both Azriel and Elain up for their betrayal, Eris backed up. Indifferent mask falling into place as he watched their lips meet. He turned down the pathway and started the walk back to the unwarded areas. All while slamming up those steel walls in his heart and mind. Pushing his feelings into a teeny tiny box and once more becoming the High Lord. The High Lord that showed no mercy, no compassion, no joy, no love, nothing except cruelty. The High Lord he’d been before Azriel. When Eris reached the end of the wards, he looked back at the River House and without a single trace of emotion winnowed out.

***

Bright light greeted him along with the shocked face of his little brother. The day court. “Eris! I thought you were with Az?” Lucien’s slightly worried voice broke Eris’ facade of indifference. His body gave out and he dropped to his knees in the middle of Lucien’s cabin. “Eris?! What happened? What’d he do?” Eris chuckled. He loved his brother. In a weak voice he asked, “Why do you assume he did something?” “Because you’d never hurt him.” Lucien’s arms encircled him and Eris felt himself being lifted off the ground. “You love him. You would do anything for that shadowsinger. He doesn’t deserve it, but you’d still do it.” “I loved him.” The words were another stab into Eris’ heart as Lucien sat him down in an armchair. “No, you love him. You, of all people, can’t unlove in twenty minutes. I know you Eris. You’re blocking your feelings, making yourself feel nothing. It’s not healthy, you’ve got to at least have closure if you’re going to end it with Az.” Eris glared, hating that Lucien was right. His damned emissary training made him absurdly good with words. “So, I ask you again. What happened?” “Luci… Ela- Elain kissed him. Your mate kissed my mate.”

*****

Azriel’s POV

It was eleven, Eris was four hours late. He probably wasn’t even coming at this point. Azriel drained his wine, glancing towards the door once more before Feyre drew his attention. “Do you know where Elain is?” It was the fifth time the question had come up, all directed at him. “No.” He’d rejected Elain again after she’d forced herself on him. She’d pinned him between the kitchen counter and not willing to hurt her, he’d been helpless. But she’d kissed him and he knew he had to do something but his body froze. He’d shoved her off after a moment and harshly told her he didn’t want her. He’d never wanted her. She’d just been a placeholder while he tried to find someone who was right for him. And he’d found that someone. She’d run off crying. He glanced outside again and still no fiery red head. “Az?” Rhysand placed a present in front of him as he looked down and Azriel with a worried gaze. “You alright?” Azriel nodded at his brother before taking the present. Carefully unwrapping the squirrel and acorn wrapping paper, Az pulled out the present. It was a small box. When opened it was a heart locket the color of autumn leaves. Upon closer inspection Azriel noticed that the locket was broken in two. He opened one side; it had a picture of Eris staring at someone not shown with a heated, loving expression. Frowning, Azriel opened the other locket to fine a picture of him staring with the same expression at someone else. He smiled slightly, putting the lockets together to show a picture of the couple locked in a heated gaze. Looking up at Rhys, his eyes watered at the incredibly thoughtful present. “It’s lovely Rhys. I love it and I’m sure Eris would if he’d bothered to show up.” His voice turned bitter and he let a little bit of his pain show. Anger shown in his brothers eyes. “I can’t believe he stood us up. I thought he was good. Do you want to go find him?” “He is good. I’m not sure. Give it another hour, if he’s not here by then we’ll go see what happened.” Rhys nodded, smiling at his brother before moving back to Feyre’s side and tucking her into his side. Azriel’s heart clenched at the love his High Lord and Lady had. He wished for it, especially the mating bond. But it seemed the Mother had deemed him unworthy of even that. Barely minutes later, Rhysand was once again standing in front of him. “Screw it Az, let’s find that asshole.” His brother had that look on his face that said he wasn’t going to back down on this front. “Fine… just let him explain before murdering anyone.” Rhys’ grin was a slash of white, “I make no promises.” He grabbed Azriel by the shoulder and winnowed them out. The scent of fresh fallen leaves hit him and Az relaxed slightly. He opened the cabin door and stepped in, Rhys a step behind him. “Er?” No answer. “He’s not here Az. Hasn’t been for hours.” Azriel nodded, stepping back into his shadows and winnowing away. There was only one more place Eris could possibly be. Az felt a knock against his mental shields. “I wish to do this alone, Rhys.” “Then best of luck, brother.”

*****

Lucien’s POV

Lucien heard a light knock against his cabin door and sighed, already knowing who stood outside. He couldn’t believe Azriel had cheated on Eris with Elain. Of all people. He wanted to give up on Elain, to find someone who wanted him and cared enough to accept and use his damn gifts. But she was his mate and that string connecting them wasn’t so easy to block. Lucien disentangled himself from his sleeping brothers arms and silently crept toward the door. “He won’t want to see you.” Meeting Azriel’s hazel eyes he felt a surge of anger, especially at the very faint smell of jasmine and honey. The shadowsinger looked confused at Lucien’s words. “Why? What did I do?” Lucien’s brows pulled together slightly, was it possible that Eris had gotten it wrong? That the situation he’d seen wasn’t what it’d looked like? An unwanted flare of hope ran through his body. “You… where were you fifteen minutes before 7:00?” “Umm.” Realization dawned on Azriel’s face. “Kitchens. Oh. So, Eris was early and saw through the window when Elain kissed me and assumed that I was cheating on him?” Damn. He’d gotten it right away. “Yep. And now you can come in, explain you hopefully weren’t cheating on him and make it so I don’t have a brooding high lord in my getaway cabin?” “If you’d step out of the doorway.” His voice lowered to a whisper. “Do you think he’ll hear me out?” Fear and sadness laced his tone. Lucien shrugged elegantly, “good luck!” He needed wine, maybe he’d stop by the River House and take a few of Rhysand’s good bottles and be back in time to kick his brother out before he had sex with the shadowsinger in his bedroom, again.

*****

Eris’ POV

A hand shook him out of his sleep and he groaned, batting the hand away. Said hand grabbed his hand and pinned it to the bed. Said hand wasn’t just calloused like Lucien’s but also had scars. Burn scars. Eris shot up, suddenly wide awake as he looked to his side and was met with a pair of hazel eyes. “Azriel.” He jumped off the bed as the memories of why he was at his brothers cabin came back. Azriel had cheated on him! With Elain. His brothers mate! “Eris, please. Let me explain.” A hint of desperation sparked in his eyes. “No! You kissed her! You-“ “Eris!” Azriel cut him off, rounding the bed to stand in front of him. “She kissed me! I-“ “You kissed her back! You know how much she means to Lucien and you still kissed her back!” “Lordling.” Azriel pushed him onto the bed and hovered above him, pinning his wrists to the mattress. “She kissed me and it took me by surprise so I froze. If you’d only stayed and watched another five fucking seconds you would have seen me push her away and tell her I don’t want her.” Eris’ emotions spiked, “Of course I didn’t stay to watch my mate kiss another! It’d tear me apart!” Azriel stilled above him. “Mate?” That’s when the bond snapped for him and Eris felt the mating bond go taunt. Rushes of desperation, surprise and love flooded his side of the bond. “Mate.” The confirmation alone made the bond glow with life. He leaned up, even as Azriel still pinned him to the bed, placing a gentle kiss on his mates lips. “I’m sorry I ever doubted your loyalty to me… I just assumed the worst and I shouldn’t have.” Azriel’s eyes softened and his body relaxed as he let got of Eris’s wrists and collapsed on top of him. “I love you, lordling.” Azriel’s hands cupped his face and he kissed him passionately, letting the bond between them come to life with shared love. “I’m the high lord. Not a lordling.” Eris grumbled into Azriel’s chest. “But I love you too, shadow boy. A waterfall of ice cold water hit the couple and they both yelped jumping up and out of bed. Eris glowered at his grinning brother as he magically dried himself and Azriel. “You’ll pay for that, Luci.” He grabbed Azriel’s hand and started to drag him out of the cabin. “At least I won’t have the scent of your sex in my cabin for weeks again!” Azriel glanced at Eris, “That long?” Eris grinned nodding, “Longer.” He winnowed them to his own getaway cabin. “Now mate, where were we?”

*****

A/n: Thank you for making it through that… hopefully without any cringing!

taglist:

@thelov3lybookworm @stargirl1714

thank you @artists-ally for keeping me sane with promises of that one thing and suggesting a name for Az.

[dark-frosted-heart]

Mirror, mirror…Who will sink into lustful dreams? - Roger Barel (His POV)

The aftermath of this story in Roger's POV.

Important: Before proceeding with this story, I'll let you know now that outside of Kate's POV, what happened before was not actually a dream.

As usual can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this

Roger: That should do it...

I'd cleaned Kate up after she passed out from being loved pretty thoroughly.

I then carried her back to her room and laid her down on the bed.

(When you wake up, you'll think everything that happened was all part of Al's illusions...)

(Still, what a misunderstanding. Never thought Kate would think the real me was an illusion)

~~ Flashback start ~~

It all started a few hours ago when Kate stumbled into the infirmary.

Roger: What's up, little lady? You feeling sick?

Kate: This suggestion’s amazing…It’s as if the real Roger’s right in front of me!

Roger: The hell are you talkin’ about?

Sounds like I'm a "fake Roger".

When my brows furrowed in confusion, Kate regained her footing and explained herself.

Kate: Um…I’ll explain later. Do you remember when you and I had a fight last week?

(A fight...Ah, something like that happened)

We had different thoughts on a mission and Kate got fed up with my position...

I remember her yelling something childish like 'I don’t want to see you again!'

Kate: So I asked Alfons to help me…practice apologizing to you. He suggested that I see Roger in a dream.

Roger: So that’s it… So we’re in your dream, huh?

(It's not suggestion though... Is it cuz of Al that you think I'm an illusion?)

(Is he harrassing me or teasing Kate...Could be both)

(I can tell Kate that this is reality but...Since she thinks it's a dream, it won't change anything)

(Now's a great chance...I can do some research on the power of suggestion)

I decided not to correct Kate's misunderstanding for the sake of my research on curses.

Roger: You’re earnest even with stuff like practicing how to apologize. I don’t really care about what you said to me back then. I know you have your own thoughts, so don’t worry about it.

Kate: I wish the real Roger would say that same thing…

Roger: He did. It’s me.

Kate: Just because Roger’s illusion forgave me so easily, doesn’t mean it’ll actually turn out like this. I shouldn’t just apologize…Should I prepare something…?

Roger: If you really wanna show your sincerity, then how ‘bout you buy him a nice beer?

Kate: …! You’re right, I should!

It was just an idea, but Kate's face lit up at the thought.

Something felt off about that happy look.

Roger: By the way, little lady, why’re you puttin’ so much effort into making up with me?

Kate: Eh…

Roger: Hate to say this but, I don’t mix business and pleasure. If you and I are fighting, it’s not gonna affect your work, is it?

Kate: The reason why I want to make up with Roger isn’t because of work…

Roger: Oh…?

Kate: I…I admire how Roger’s researching curses and his diligent approach to treatment others. Though I think it’d be nice if you were less pushy or mean… I put my trust in Roger. That’s why I don’t want to stay on bad terms with him.

(I'm hearing a confession...)

~~ Flashback end ~~

I couldn't control myself after hearing something like that...

I ended up assaulting Kate, forgetting about my research.

Roger: "Putting your trust in me" huh...

I mull over the thoughts she'd never say to the real me.

It's like those words were more intoxicating than any strong drink.

(If she says those kinds of cute things in a dream...she's not gonna return to reality)

I know it's an impossible dream, but...

I wanted her to say what she said to illusion me to the real me.

--

The next day on my way to the dining hall for breakfast, I ran into Kate who'd just woken up.

Kate: ...Roger...

Kate's face turned red and flustered like she was remembering last night as a dream.

Roger: Oh, mornin'. You're acting weird...Something you wanna say?

Kate: Ah...Uh...well... I'm really sorry I said that I didn't want to see your face again that day!

Roger: Don't worry about it...I was being stubborn so we're even.

Kate: Thank you... Please let me buy you some nice beer.

Roger: Sure, lookin' forward to it...

Seeing how Kate used last night's experience, I could feel my lips quirking up.

Then, as if she caught my smile, Kate smiled back.

(Don't you know that I take advantage of you when you smile so defenselessly around me like that?)

Even if it was just a dream for Kate, something like that happened last night...

I wanted to bully Kate again as she kept her guard down.

Roger: To show we've made up...Lift your face a bit

Kate: Eh? Sure...Nn, hmm?!

I stole a kiss when Kate looked up.

Roger: ...Alright, we're back to normal now

Kate: What...Things aren't back to normal, they've gotten worse! Roger you're so...shameless...The Roger in my dream was like that too...

Roger: What about me in your dream?

Kate: N-nothing! Nothing at all!

Either out of anger or embarrassment, Kate's ears turn red and she runs away.

I watch her leave while holding back my laughter.

(Just one push away from it all tumbling down...)

(I wonder how long she can keep her bluff?)

(Well, it can go a little longer...I'm liking this little tug-o-war we have on whatever you'd call this relationship)

(But it's not gonna be a one-night dream if it falls to my side)

[battelcry]

(Tw for suicide again)

One thing i really love about Father Ares being my patron deity is how he's always there when I'm studying for my especially Greek and Latin exams and drives me even more to be better in terms of work ethic, productivity and discipline.

I mean... I'm sure for many of you He's definitely not the first go-to deity to seek help for academic matters but when you pray and let him guide you he's just amazing (like in everything) like teachers you had when you were little who were somewhat despotic and annoying in the eyes of little students but as the end of the year approaches you just realise how endearing and full of love he is. He is legitimately that when you're studying with him and his guidance.

I've heard a lot of times that many other Ares worshippers or devotees experienced his love as tough, which wasn't the case for me—Until i studied... I shouldn't have any shame to admit that I'm sometimes like a sloth and unfortunately very perfectionistic so i end up being extremely overwhelmed about my studies and my future anytime i fail doing the littlest thing and spend weeks in academia-induced existential dread where i can make space for studying more instead of worrying. That is for sure something I'm practicing in order for consistency and proper discipline in every aspect of life.

Thankfully, my dear father holds my hand there too. It wasn't even until a month ago i started my major in Classics and i was totally estranged and scared of everything even if it was my interest—and in some way a religious practice, Isn't it? I was contemplating ending it all honestly, again but when he's right there i just know that he won't let me, not even by a single chance.

You can't defeat the army of your unwanted self who serves you not by deserting. In the battle with the self deserting will only bring the army with you. No victors nor winners, then you will ask yourself what was all the fighting for if at the end both are obliterated. Dostoevsky wrote in Crime and Punishment 'And your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.' What victory will it bring deserting if not only the excruciating betrayal to oneself? Will it ever worth?

Father made me ask these questions to myself in my times of distress and crisis. His warning was rather tough this time, but crucial for sure. Slowly I'm breaking my patterns of perfectionism stemmed actlessness. My harsh process of regulating my fear towards the future as well. It's tough but I'm learning discipline and consistency in my work and I'm so thankful that he holds my hand and leads the way.

He is like a father holding his little baby by their arms and making them take little steps until they are walking on their own even if they will evidentally fall within seconds. The baby will cry and scream with pain but their father will ease the wounds and hold their arms for more steps.

The baby is you. He will make you cry, he will let you feel your worst. But only for the things you will learn at the end, he will keep teaching you regardless.

May this be an offering in the name of him. I'm again, so lucky and thankful for having his support no matter how stubborn and insufferable I can be sometimes. Praise be Father Ares. My love for him is just unexplainable with the words of human vernacular.

[chronocrump]

Hello Chronocrump, I recently stumbled upon your art the other day, and I couldn't stop staring at your gallery.. It makes me realize there is so much thats lacking from my art that I really want to improve on. I felt desperate to contact you, but wasn't sure if it would be rude. I wanted to try to ask you, how do you approach drawing? Do you structure it first, or start with a gesture drawing? Focus on the form or perspective first? Etc My other question might seem strange, but I wanted to ask how do you hold your pencil? Ive learned that different pencil grips can drastically change the quality of someone's art. Thank you for your time. I'm sorry if my message is to long, or you don't want to respond back. I wanted to atleast try, but also let you know that your work has been very inspiring for me to keep trying.

I'm glad to answer your questions, it's seriously no problem. I wanna start by telling you how amazed I was when I checked your profile to see your work. I know you have a huge lack of confidence in it, but your art is genuinely beautiful, and frankly, looking at it, I found it hard to believe that you would be asking me for advice...from my perspective, you're way ahead of me. You're certainly better with color; you might notice I really only post sketches lol. I really don't want to dismiss or downplay your feelings about it, but I have to let you know how I felt looking at it. To me it seems like your brain is telling you your art isn't good enough when it very, very much is.

Anyway, enough gushing from me lol. On to your questions.

Usually when starting a drawing, I very loosely and lightly sketch the overall form of the pose I wanna do. Very rough basic shapes/forms to get everything in its right place before I start really drawing it with confident lines. Even then, all the lines are subject to change; nothing is sacred. To be honest tho, I usually mess up the proportions and have to fix them a bit lol. I try to sketch cleanly and concisely, meaning I try not to draw a lot of lines in a spot that could really be done with just one or two. I'm not super strict on that tho, at the end of the day while I try to draw efficiently, I also want to draw comfortably. So with something like a big circle for example, I'll draw that pretty sketchy. In terms of perspective, I'm trying to get better at it, but when considering how I want to use it in a drawing, it's part of the initial image or idea I have in my head, so I lay it out from the beginning. I do also draw structure lines on the face, just a simple cross to plan where the center of the face will be. Lately I've also tried taking more pictures of myself for pose reference and it works well.

Most of my practice comes from studying my favorite artists and trying to emulate the specific ways they structure their drawings. I should actually be doing dedicated practice sessions with that, but I digress. Recently I've been trying to practice from photos first thing in the morning, tho I'm finding it hard to commit to doing it daily. I just go on pinterest and find cool poses, then draw them, trying to get down the basic shapes and prominent features more than focusing on minute details. I've posted some of these practice sketches on here but there's a few more on my twitter if you wanna see what I'm talking about.

In terms of my pencil grip, I'm not sure...since I was little, I've always had an unusual grip. Looking it up, I guess it's like the "dynamic quadrupod" grip, but with my forefinger farther back. Really the most I try to do is draw less with my wrist and more with my forearm. Some say you should "draw from the shoulder", and that sounds right...I guess it's all about avoiding straining your wrist and getting carpal tunnel lol.

Anyway, I'm flattered that you would ask me for advice. To be honest, it makes me feel like I should have more confidence in my own art. And you should too! I can say that, objectively, your art is very good. I hope my advice was actually helpful and not generic stuff you've heard before lol. Good luck in your art journey.

[angedemystere]

You know what’s the most tragic part of Judas storyline on The Chosen? Part of Judas always felt like he didn't belong in the group, and he was kinda right. Jesus had high hopes for all his apostles except Judas.

Watch out, I got a long reply to this!

I don't feel that so much about Judas in season 3. It would've been nice to see him getting close to a couple of the disciples, like we see with John and Thomas. Even so, he was involved with the group from the start. It's more in season 4 I can see how he doesn't seem to be as "in tune" with the group.

But here's something to keep in mind: this idea that Jesus had "high hopes" for everyone except Judas may be something we, the audience who knows the story, are projecting.

In terms of being supported or elevated, sure, Simon Peter and John have had special attention, but I'm pretty sure Judas has had as many one-on-one onscreen moments with Jesus as most of the disciples. And ALL the disciples struggle on some level with Jesus's mission and identity. That's a huge part of the story that's not unique to Judas.

What I see the show doing is showing how, yes, Jesus is not holding Judas's hand through every moment whenever Judas wants to improve the ministry through fiscal strategy. But Judas is also failing to internalize the things Jesus has said point blank. He tells Judas to think back to the Sermon on the Mount. Judas doesn't follow up on this; instead he goes to Hadad, his former mentor, for advice. Yes, Judas is a tragic and very relatable figure.

But let's not pretend Jesus is orchestrating Judas's downfall or letting it happen through neglect. He's given Judas many opportunities to better understand the mission, as have other disciples (Simon Z, John). Judas is getting in his own way to that understanding. He keeps defaulting to what he thinks he knows and how things should be done and is frustrated when his input is exposed as faulty.

Judas keeps thinking in worldly terms - and that makes sense. Most of us think in worldly terms. Christians often think in worldly terms without realizing it. That's why we have to keep going back to prayer, to Scripture, and putting aside how we would do things to focus on how God wants us to do things.

The very first experience Judas had as a disciple of Jesus was the two-by-two mission where they did not take anything, ANYTHING, with them. This approach taught them to fully trust in God's provision, and they continued to do that when they reunited. Judas doesn't fully internalize the lesson, or he finds God's degree of provision unsatisfying when he keeps thinking about bringing about an earthly kingdom with Jesus on an earthly throne.

And this attitude is not singular to Judas - many Jews at that time thought the Messiah would drive out the Romans and establish a new Jewish kingdom on earth. John and Big James believe this, too - that's why they ask Jesus to sit "at your right and left hand." And what happens? Jesus is pissed. He's angry and frustrated and heartbroken because they think he's come to be an earthly king, not the kingdom of Heaven, despite everything he's been teaching them.

It just so happens that Judas isn't willing to revise that belief in the face of all the ways Jesus is renouncing that vision of the Messiah. The fact Judas still believes Jesus is the Messiah at this point is quite amazing.

I feel for Judas in his struggle and see how his character flaws are pushing him in a dangerous direction. As for Jesus, I think he shows his love for Judas in the show, even if he's not sitting Judas down for lengthy heart-to-heart chats.

[askbohemiancompany]

The end of the year.

A lot has happened for me this year, yet it feels like nothing happened at all.

My blog turned 10 years old this year. I got away from phone work. I started writing an actual story for my original setting very slowly, feeling like I have something to show even if not completed. I even made a blog for it.

To be upfront, my imposter syndrome has always been a lingering issue. I’ve been around for so long, yet I have always felt I have had nothing to show. It is not something I think I can kick due to my own depression, but a lot of people this year have made kicking it back easier.

So I am going to ramble off the cuff for a moment.

@team-pokefriends -you saying you binged my entire blog really meant a lot for me. It happened at the right time to, it was when I was at my lowest mentally so seeing someone go through everything made my heart skip a beat. Also fighting game enjoyers for real for real.

@feyvagabondart / @teammaxvolume as always you have continued to be one of the best allies in the community to me. I appreciate your enthusiasm and love for the community. I appreciate being able to work with you and everyone on the zine.

@lustrous-dawn - you have been my motivator for most of the year for me. Both out of respect for your ability as a writer, and envy. You put yourself out in the community this year in a big way this year, watching Zhen and Susanno interact with other blogs is great. I wish I could consistently interact with others as you did. You are still one of the most grounded in the community and a straight shooter to. I am excited to see what happens to those old birds.

@asksavel -I’ve mentioned before you were one of the reasons I started working on my blog. You and I have been talking more lately and you have been both engaging and helpful for my mental health after work turned ugly. That day was so helpful for me.

@ask-the-royal-absol - You made the community engaging with one of the most impactful in a long time. Destino has hit the community like a goddamn cannonball and it fun to see everyone get hit by the blast. Gwen and Destino interactions have been fun and I hope for more from them in the future.

@casteliacityramen You have given me a death grip in terms of the story I am 100% engaged with. Rio has become one of my favorite characters in the Pokeask community and I am eagerly checking any updates with the blog waiting to see what happens next. The reveal was probably one of the the biggest drops of the year.

@askcapital - one of the other story and characters that continues to grip me. The debut of Capital’s Hoopa form is one of the coolest moments. Their design is a winner and I want to learn more about them. I also appreciate your patience with me commissioning you a lot this year for a number of projects.

@breed-station - You have been one of the most approachable people for me this year. Not only for collaborating on the ask swap, but also for helping with the shiny dex to where I am now 88% complete with the dex. It has been fun touch trading and making that number tick higher.

@askleaderscrest - not only have you also been helpful with the shiny dex, but it has been great talking one on one with you. You have been grounded to talk to and you are someone I like to hear from for both blog and general adulting stuff. I always appreciate being able to talk on this kind of stuff.

@asktheisle you continue to be one of the most welcoming people to talk to. You remain engaging with Nat being a fun dynamic characters to watch. It was also amazing collaborating with you on the plot to unscramble Grohl’s brain.

I admit I am terrified for next year, but I can at least use this place as an escape. I know this community will help me move past what 2024 throws at me.

Here’s hoping for a better year.

[waterfallofspace]

Timing Is Everything.

Characters: Y/uta, G/ojo, I/numaki, M/aki, and P/anda. (feat. I/nuokku pairing implied <3) Word Count: 2.1k

Just a little gift for @ithadtobesneezing as she's been FEEDING us with Y/uta content <33

It's nothing amazing, but you've sparked the fire of love for your guy, so here's a lil something I hope you can enjoy~

All Characters 18+, picture early 20's AU (+ no bad stuff has happened <3)

(References to implied contagion, and high fever, and near fainting/dizziness, just incase anyone doesn't like those!)

~~~~~~~

A light breeze drifts through the air, the first hint of fall approaching. Summer had dragged on late into September, leaving the cool touch a welcome change to everyone. 

Almost everyone, that is. 

Burrowing deeper in his uniform, Yuta grits his teeth against the cold nestling in his bones. Despite the heat smothering him inside out, each chill seems to leave him trembling. Casting his gaze back to the field, it’s clear no one notices. Their attention is caught by the scene unfolding. 

Maki and Gojo are ‘sparring’, a term used loosely. More accurately, Maki is throwing things at Gojo’s infinity. Inumaki and Panda are both laughing, Panda cheering Maki on as Inumaki passes her more weapons to aim. Amidst the chaos, Yuta’s silence is largely overlooked. 

It’s not unusual for him to be a bit subdued during a meetup with his friends; being a special grade sorcerer has some deficits to go along with the profits. Still, he can’t help noticing that Gojo is right in the middle of the group, cheerful as ever despite his own long week. 

A pang of guilt finds its home in Yuta’s chest, the familiar burning leaping to his eyes. The feelings that always seem to grow in ferocity when his mind gets clouded. With a rough sniff, he rubs a sleeve across his face, sucking in a deep breath. Frustration swells, only dispelled when a gasp slips through his parted lips. 

He quickly ducks into his fist, massaging the twitching appendage before it blows his cover. Sunken eyes flicker back to the group, the breath he didn’t realize was trapped in his chest breaking free. They’re all still absorbed in their own world, Inumaki and Panda joining in on the game. 

Taking advantage of the privacy while it lasts, Yuta allows himself a deep sigh, his sleeve-coated hand scrubbing at his nose. The slow crawl of ticklish desire had been creeping its way deeper since this morning. 

He’d hoped to fight it off until he got home, or at least escaped from sight. The glimmer of light dancing across his face as a tear drifts down his flushed cheeks suggests no such hope should be dwelled on. 

“Yuutaaaa~” 

The tone is distinct, a melodic sound echoing throughout the yard. Sure enough, as Yuta raises his head from the safety of his hands, Gojo is waving him over. Maki and Panda are yelling about something he can’t quite make out, Inumaki holding up a popsicle stick figure with Panda’s head on it. 

Raising from his seat Yuta lurches forward, the floor beginning to shift under him. He instinctively drops his hand to steady himself, eyes squeezing shut. Once the world decides to let him off the unrequested roller coaster, his eyes begin to reopen. Relief floods his system as none of the others seem to pay him much mind. 

“I did not say that! In fact, I recall you were the one who filled out that report, therefore it was your responsibility to follow up.” Inumaki raises a Maki stick. 

“Oh really? Then why is your signature on the form?” Inumaki raises a Panda stick. 

“What?” Snatching the paper from his hands, Maki groans, aiming a swing at Panda’s chest. “You forged my signature again?!” 

Gojo’s simply watching, a childlike giggle bubbling from his chest as Inumaki raises the Panda stick once more. This time Maki knocks it from his hand, Inumaki glaring at her and huffing out, “Bonito flakes.” 

Once he’s sure the next step won’t realign the world, Yuta begins his trek across the mere feet between him and the others. His breath snags dangerously, the sensation nipping at his sinuses. A hand flies to his face, catching his nose and tightening against the onslaught. 

Catching Inumaki’s eyes, Yuta feels his hand snap back to his side. A single sniffle is all he allows himself before taking in a rush of air and painting his usual timid smile across his cheeks. Inumaki stares for a second longer, but ultimately shakes it off, raising an arm to gesture him closer. 

“What are they arguing about this time?” Yuta asks, aiming the question towards Gojo as Maki takes another swing at Panda’s legs. He’d heard it all quite clearly from the chair, but each vibration from his throat seems to bring new levels of itch to his breath. Best to give Gojo a chance to start rambling. 

For a moment Yuta’s convinced he’s been caught. Normally that kind of question would get Gojo bouncing as he gives a play by play. Today, instead, he simply shrugs, tilting his head just enough to let a single brilliant blue peek from behind his glasses. 

Yuta meets the look with a smile, letting his eyes flutter shut to sell the lie, ignoring the watering that begins as soon as his lashes touch down. It seems to work, however, Gojo yelling something nonsensical at Maki, strutting over with a raised hand. 

The itch chooses this moment to begin another resurgence, scratching through his restraint with a hungry determination. Yuta risks a glance at Inumaki, who appears preoccupied with fixing his popsicle stick Panda. Gojo is still shouting, Maki echoing the noises as she chases Panda around. 

“hHehh!” The hitch breaks through his control, unnoticed by the group. Deciding this is the ideal time to smother one without being caught, Yuta twists himself away from the group, raising an arm to his face. With the other he clutches his shoulder, bracing himself against the fierce tickle. 

“Hey Yuta, we want you to break a tie.” 

Panic grips Yuta’s chest as the field suddenly falls silent, each hitch spouting from his lips seeming to shatter against the peaceful quiet. He attempts to pry open his eyes, to no avail. After permission was given, the sneeze was far too strong to hold off anymore. 

“hH’ihhTZZdj’ehhh-!” 

All eyes turn to him, a shimmering ocean beginning to well in his own. Before he can utter a word, his breath catches in his throat. “ihHKzzTSChhiyeww-!” This time he only manages to raise a single hand, bending over with the force of the pitchy whine that bursts forth.

As the earth begins to tilt again, Yuta drops to his knees, only steading himself as a hand grips his shoulder. Keeping his eyes tightly closed, Yuta leans his head against it. After a minute the buzzing fades from his ears, and he slowly rejoins the world. 

He expects to see a few faces of disgust, maybe some anger. To his surprise, no one seems to be looking his way at all. Maki’s yelling something at Gojo, attempting to whack him with her staff. His infinity blocks it easily, though he looks distraught anyways. 

“-are you aiming that at me?! I didn’t do anything!” 

“You-” Maki pauses to swipe Panda off his feet behind her, returning her glare to Gojo as the sound of fur hitting grass sounds off. “You ‘didn’t do anything’? You got him sick!”

Gojo huffs, crossing his arms with an indignant look. “You and Inumaki were sick just a few days ago, how do you know you didn’t get him sick?” The smirk he’s wearing suggests he’s proud of this little deduction, but Maki simply growls in response. 

There’s a break from the conversation as Yuta ducks towards the ground again, raising his arm to catch a fatigued “hH’KNchhZZSHyeww-!”, so few sneezes already sucking all the energy from his body.

Inumaki’s hand tightens on his shoulder, Yuta humming a soft “Thanks.” 

“Maybe we did, remind me for a minute though,” Maki says with a sigh aimed towards the duo, swinging her weapon towards Gojo again. “Who got us sick?”

The sheepish look scrawled across Gojo’s face says it all, and Maki lets up on her assault, instead learning against her pole. “I already had to deal with Inumaki’s symptoms.” 

A vaguely offended, “Salmon roe.” sounds from where Inumaki’s crouched, Maki shooting him a soft look. 

“Sorry- Look, okay, I just don’t want to deal with-” 

“hH’TzzzcSHHyieew-!” Yuta interrupts, groaning faintly as the force of it sends his head careening into his arm far harsher than he’d expected. 

“With that,” Maki finishes, gesturing to Yuta’s trembling form. 

As Yuta gears up for another outburst, Inumaki lightly rubs his arm, humming something unintelligible under his breath. “hH’TIezzsshh’kiew-!” 

Once he’s sure this one didn’t readjust the world too much, Inumaki raises his gaze from Yuta to shoot a glare at Maki. She raises her hands in mock surrender, grumbling under her breath. It quickly fades as Yuta dissolves into a fit of coughing that leaves him gasping for air, Inumaki dropping back to his side. 

“Okay, okay, sorry…” Maki sighs, Yuta managing to catch a glimpse of concern in her eyes as his cough fades enough for a full breath. Maki continues with a softer tone, “I didn’t mean that. I just…” 

Yuta gives her a weary smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “I know. It’s… it…” His eyes drift over her shoulder, vision starting to swim. He manages a breath, dancing the edge of control as the tickle retreats. 

“Sorry, thought I was…” Yuta hums, breathless as he attempts to continue the sentence, quickly dissolving into stammering, voice stolen by the pinprick itch spreading through his nose. “Wait, no I am… I’m… I’m uh… hH’yieTZZzshhYEWW-!” 

This time Yuta feels himself tipping forward, the world around him softening at the edges. The grounding touch against his shoulder begins to slip away, a dark sensation touching the corners of his thoughts. Just before he loses consciousness, a sharp pain cuts through the darkness, pulling him back to the light. 

Inumaki’s still gripping his shoulder, but the ache radiates from his face. Managing to get a grasp of his surroundings, Yuta finds Maki kneeling in front of him. Her hand is hovering in the air, as if she was unsure where to leave it. 

“Did… you slap me..?” Yuta manages, voice wavering with a mixture of relief and fatigue.

“Did you just nearly faint?” Comes the retort, Maki’s own voice not as solid as it would normally be. There’s a quiver to it that wasn’t there a minute ago, her eyes burning into his skull with an intensity not unlike her.

Still, there was something different to this gaze. Something distinctly afraid. Blushing under his gaze, she huffs. “You should be thanking me."

Opening his mouth, Yuta attempts to oblige, instead only managing a whimper as his lungs begin to spasm again. 

Maki watches for a minute, glare still pointed at him, before finally she lets up. “Oh just forget it, okay? Just… just try to breathe. You’re alright.” Her tone is soft, a single finger gently brushing some hair away from his eyes. “I think you have a fever, have you taken anything?” 

The silence is an answer, just as true as any sounds would be. At this admission, Maki turns to Panda with a pointed look. Panda gives a thumbs up, running off towards the school to grab some supplies Shoko still keeps there. Attention back on Yuta’s fragile state, Inumaki gently tucks an arm around his back, raising him to a standing position. 

They stand for a minute, Maki securing herself on the other side before beginning the walk back to the school. Yuta holds his breath, a strangled sob dying in his throat as tears begin to pour. At this, Inumaki begins humming again, something quiet and soft. Maki copies the tune, rolling her eyes with a barely contained smile. 

“Where was this softness when I was sick?” Gojo calls, the trio whipping around, nearly toppling Yuta in the process. Both supporters cast glares Gojo’s way, Yuta too busy righting the world in his head to copy their motions. 

“When you were sick you were clinging to our legs and rubbing your germs on everything.” 

Gojo pouts, attempting to sniffle, and instead simply inhaling. “I was sick! None of you did anything for me, I just needed som-” He’s quickly cut off by Maki tossing a dagger at his chest, infinity stopping it easily. Still, he gasps in mock hurt, chuckling as this earns him another (attempted) blow to the gut. 

Yuta soon forgotten, Maki lunges back towards him, daring him to drop infinity and fight her head on. The rest of the battle fades into the background as Inumaki positions himself on the ground, pulling Yuta down beside him. 

A yawn sneaks out from Yuta’s jaw, his eyes beginning to pool again. The same breath turns into a hitch, Yuta muffling a “hieH’tzZZchhyEW-!” into Inumaki’s chest. 

Inumaki hums gently into his ear in lieu of a blessing. Then, draping his arm around Yuta’s shoulder, Inumaki pulls him close, running his fingers through Yuta’s messy hair. 

By the time Panda gets back with the medication, Yuta and Inumaki are asleep, dozing to the soft sounds of Maki and Gojo’s sparring. 

Even through the tangled mess of limbs, Inumaki’s arm remains protectively draped across Yuta’s back.

[ejsuperstar]

EJ rambles about Iron Leaguer, Iron Leaguer aus, and the horror of no longer having ownership of your own body.

Spoilers ahead for Iron Leaguer, Fools Gold, and The Amazing Digital Circus

A throughline through all of my iron leaguer aus seems to be "leaguers getting heavily modified without their consent" and it was not intentional but it is something I like the idea of. Like. The kind of existential horror of it all. Of not being able to trust your own body. Of it not being yours.

With my oc, Bronze, he has to slowly come to terms with the fact his body is not his own. Like at all. He got hit by a car and his owners just kidnapped the closest leaguer and shoved his surviving parts into him. And now he has to live with the guilt that his continued existence is at the detriment to someone else.

My fools gold au has Quinn-ora heavily modifying random leaguers, leaguers she kidnapped. Inflicting them with viruses to slowly take over their memories and personalities for her own benefit.

And my tadc au. Caine is definitely *more* ethical than Quinn-ora as he breaks into places and takes Iron Soldiers to mod, but at the end of the day he doesn't consider them people. He puts arbitrary limitations into their systems. He actively modifies their memories and personalities for his own personal gain. He toys with them because he doesn't see them as people, just his latest engineering project.

I do like this idea. The existential dread of realising that you hold no power over your own body. You know things have changed. You know it's not right. But do you even remember what's correct? Do you even know who you were before this? How can you tell those memories haven't been tampered with. How can you know that you ever made them to begin with. Just how much of you has been changed without you realising? Just how much can be changed while still staying the same person. If you replace every part are you the same leaguer? What do you do when you need maintenance. You can't deny it. You need it. But when you next check yourself will you be the same? Maybe you've have a plate swapped. A hand. An eye. A face. Maybe a harddrive. Are you sure you were always like this? So touchy? So anxious? Did they make you like this? Of course they did. But was it because what they're doing to your body or... Or what they could be doing to your mind.

You want to leave. You can't stand the thought of staying. Not after everything they've done. But as you approach the exit in the dead of night. You hesitate. Doubt floods your mind. Your resolve starts to waver. You're just overreacting...

Or that's what they want you to think. They planted those thoughts in your head.

No of course not that's insane

But you know SOMETHING'S going on. You can't stay here that's for certain.

You try to open to door, but your hand won't turn the knob. It just. It won't. You want to. You have every desire to. But. Something in the back of your head stops you from even trying.

And then then your legs buckle under you. You fall to your knees. The lights in the room turn on (or were they always like that?), and you're just knelt there, gripping a doorknob. Pathetically.

Your owner spots the light and enters the room. They question what's going on. Gently, they help you up. They ask what's wrong. Suddenly, all the feelings come flowing out, all the worries and fears and doubts. They comfort you, tell you that you're worried over nothing, but you're welcome to leave at any point.

You thank them as they guide you back to your charging dock. The owner is so nice, what were you even worried about?

Nevermind... It's not important.

[wizard-irl]

Buying Crystals - Capitalist Spirituality

Part 6 of 7 for a guide on buying crystals. Read the rest here!

Another sad entry in this series. Spiritual people and people who involve crystals in their spiritual practices are uniquely situated to be scammed hard by people using their spirituality against them. However, this is easy to avoid if you understand the language people use to make crystals more appealing.

Case Study

You may remember Heaven and Earth LLC from a prior part on trademarks. This is an example from them, copied from this page:

This interesting stone from off the coast of Africa appears to be a banded mixture of white Quartz and purple Amethyst, with v-shaped patterning. When we checked the energies, we were amazed to recognize that it vibrated in the frequencies of Azeztulite! This discovery confirmed what the Azez––the guardian angelic group soul responsible for all the Azeztulites––had foretold. Continent-by-continent, the energies of the Nameless Light are penetrating and activating more and more varieties of Quartz in an increasing number of locations. This process, and all the energies moving toward Planetary Vibrational Ascension, appears to have been accelerated, just as the Azez foretold.

Amazez can purify one’s field in a way that makes possible conscious interaction with higher beings on many spiritual planes. The angels, and even the Azez themselves, can more readily approach one who has been purified by this stone. Amazez is also an excellent stone for out-of-body travel, raising one’s vibration high enough to transcend the body while simultaneously protecting one from negative influences.

This rock is labeled as “Azozeo Super-Activated.”

Analysis of Case Study

This is chevron amethyst (”mixture of white Quartz and purple Amethyst, with v-shaped patterning”) likely from Madagascar (” from off the coast of Africa”).

Notice how the only physical description they give of the crystal is “banded mixture of white Quartz and purple Amethyst, with v-shaped patterning,” the dimensions, and the weight. Most of the description is focused on telling the story, of “checking the energies” and finding its “frequencies” matched these “Azez,” a “guardian angelic group soul.” They discuss this “Nameless Light” that moves energies towards “Planetary Vibrational Ascension.” Then they provide the metaphysical use of the crystal.

What does this listing tell you? Do you feel moved that such a powerful crystal is being sold? Do you feel like you’ll be able to achieve your goals much easier if you have it? Do you feel like possessing this crystal will allow you to raise your own vibrations? Does “Azozeo Super-Activat[ion]” make you feel like this crystal has more worth than a similar product?

Further, nowhere on the page do they disclose the crystal’s origin. I supposed that its from Madagascar, since I’ve seen chevron amethysts come from there. But no, this listing comes from the mystical, magical land of *~Africa~*. Do you think you will a) get an ethically sourced crystal and/or b) get a good deal by buying from this dealer? I think not. 

This is nowhere near unique to this company, as one of my previous posts on andara crystals will tell you. Everyone does this because it works. I don’t blame people who fall for it because they are the victims here. They have been told that a hunk of glass that promises to improve everything is worth a college semester of money. No, it is the fault of the sellers, who may also be just as duped as their customers, but may full well know what they’re peddling and continue to exploit people with a belief because they can wring hundreds and thousands of dollars from them in exchange for something worth much less.

Snake oil really hasn’t changed; it's only crystallised. 

Red Flag Terms

The biggest red flag for me when buying crystals is emphasising metaphysical properties. This is not to knock using crystals for spirituality; I’d be a hypocrite if I was knocking it. However, suppose you already believe in this stuff. In that case, you’re more likely to believe these crystals are more valuable because they’re “supercharged” or “encoded with Pleiadean messages.”

As with part one on ethics, a seller that will not disclose the source of their crystals, either openly or after being asked, is also suspect, which many of these New Age-flavoured sellers will not do.

You should also look out for several words and phrases in both the titles and description of listings, since sellers will use them to try and make you think their products are worth more than they actually are.

Activation, codes, encoding, downloads, attunement, upgrade.

Vibration, higher vibration, 4D-12D, multidimensional, higher dimension/density.

Ascension, ascended master[s].

Shaman[ic], chakra[s], reiki, [K/Q]ab[b]ala[h], Elohim, other appropriated practices and terms.

Using the name or image of minority groups unassociated with the crystal, often but not exclusively indigenous groups, portraying these groups to be more magical or “closer to the Earth” to make the crystal seem. more magical or powerful by association.

Any stars, planets, or constellations (Sirian, Arcturian, Lyran, Pleidean, Venusian, etc); galactic, elestial, celestial, cosmic; starseed, cosmic family, High Council.

Lemuria, Atlantis, Mu, other “lost civilisations”; Egypt (when the crystal did not originate there).

[Arch]angel, specific angel names (Michael, Raphael, Metatron), divine presence, Christ consciousness, God frequency, names of saints and prophets (St. Germain).

Astral projection, aura[s], akashic record[s], past life recall, scalar light, twin flame, [rainbow/crystalline/master] energy, Mt. Shasta, vortex.

Rainbow, indigo (in tandem or not with the actual appearance of the crystal).

Gaia, Thoth, other gods.

Fairy, fae, any kind of spirit.

Mon[o]atomic, quantum, DNA, other misused scientific terms.

Merlin, sorcerer[’]s stone, magic[k[al]], healing.

If you see these terms, think: if these terms weren’t here, would I still want to buy this crystal at all/at this price?

The next part will end the guide, and serve both as a summary of points as well as where you actually go to buy crystals and how to go about it.