#when they called him up LMAO.

[jvzebel-x]

why don't you have some dirty hot sex with me?

(it ain't like i'm asking you to give it up for free.)

[luminarai]

Most people will tell you that giving your pets any kind of medication in pill form is an absolute nightmare, meanwhile I have the exact opposite problem.

A friend of mine was watching my cat Mim while I was travelling this weekend and when he went to split her weekly allergy pill (made to split into 4 small pills when you press down on it with a finger) to give her the usual 1/4, he fumbled it and sent it skittering across the floor where my ridiculous pill-loving menace of cat immediately gobbled down the whole thing, leading to me receiving a panicked phone call at 11 pm from said friend who was understandably freaking out (everyone’s fine, a single high dose won’t cause any problems as long as it’s just this once).

Behold: the villain herself, basking in the success of her crime (she’d be planning her next pill-related heist but, as you can see if you look closely, there’s there’s nothing but elevator music behind those eyes)

[littlewinnow]

I love your drarry dads au so much! Do you think baby scorp will ever get around to calling Harry some variation of dad or will he always be Harry ™?

Thank you!!

Oh I constantly think about this, I think he’d switch it up saying harry or dad when he gets older.

I hc that currently toddler scorp made up his own nickname for harry because of Draco at first 😂

[wigglebox]

Newsflash: They sound ridiculous either way

[ratatatastic]

maffhew who refuses to say runebergin torttu because he knows hes gonna butcher it so bad he might be kicked out of the country the second he tries and staunchly avoids that by going "the one dessert that barky is going to have to explain 😃"

sasha who gets faced with the most generic description of everything hes ever eaten in his life so far because of maffhew and going "???... oh you mean runebergin torttu!"

"he did good he liked the food and he likes the finland so far so its good" sasha says with so much pride now that all the anxiety has left his system that his husband teammate is enjoying his country and doesnt hate it

media availability | 10.29.24 (x)(x)

the smile of a man who knowlingly doomed his husband and said husband using all his brain power to context clues his way to whatever the fuck he just got asked that his brain is running hotter than a mid 2012 macbook air thats somehow still alive in the year of the lord 2024 but girl does she chug along shes louder than a fighter jet

[sc0rpain]

joels newest hermitcraft episode was great for many reasons but. the contrast between "cis straight white man mining content" and scar telling joel and etho to get a room.

[freakinator]

sorry wemmbu but you couldnt handle s2 zam's transfem swag so minute cucked you instead

[justaz]

even tho merlin constantly complains about tournaments and arthur goes on and on about glory and honor, merlin is always the loudest in the stands and arthur always finds merlin’s eye first when he wins

[purpurussy]

can we talk about this i feel like we didn't talk about this properly. the fact that dan owns a pair of tabi shoes haunts me. he probably has a pair of those iconic margiela tabi boots right

like these ones. dan stop being a coward bring out the tabis. i wanna see what he does with them

[butwhatifidothis]

I guess the ultimate thing that kills CF for me - or at least nudges it away from me saying I definitively like it - is just how much Edelgard is clearly written with the player in mind before she's written with her character in mind.

Because on all of the other routes, there's a power to Edelgard's presence. Even on BE, there's a sense that for as lonely as Edelgard might be, she still ultimately will do whatever it takes for her to get what she wants. Be that be killing her citizens (or otherwise letting them be killed), endangering her friends, assisting in kidnapping people, allowing Byleth to support her only when they have the Sword of the Creator, covering for TWS - no bar is too low for her to limbo under if doing so means she's even a step closer to her goals.

She's manipulative! She's deceitful! She doesn't care for the lives of her people! Even her friends are forfeit if they try to stand in her way! And this happens no matter how close you, the player, get to her, in the case of BE - C+ ain't stoppin' Remire, and going to the coronation ain't stopping the Holy Tomb.

And in the war phase, she is dominating the field. She has the Kingdom completely on the ropes, down to a few houses standing against Imperial rule, and the Alliance is stuck in neutrality - she may not be able to do much to it, but neither can they do anything to her (to say nothing of the Alliance houses who stand with her). She's far from the underdog in this race, and she shows off how threatening she can be.

CF? Her route?

She scweams at scawy rats. She gets embawwassed when you find her dwawings. She's just so wonewy, and she's just so gwad that you chose her. She somehow fails to capture Rhea, or frame Dimitri for regicide, and so now has to deal with that on the Kingdom's side of the war. But that doesn't stop Elly Welly-kins fwom twying to find her pwecious teacher, because you're just so important to her. She cwies and hugs you when you meet her in the Goddess Tower!! Because she missed you so much!!

It's like... Dimitri and Claude certainly show different sides of themselves on their respective routes. It's the whole point! You grow closer to them and thus see how they treat those close to them, as opposed to being the Kinda Neat Teacher they see run along every now and then. But, like... Claude doesn't become a blushing maiden whenever Byleth speaks with him on VW. Dimitri doesn't scream at scary rats and get called cute for it on AM. They don't get Basic Bitch Gap Moe Traits slapped onto them that are only ever shown to the player and only on their routes. Unlike Edelgard.

Dimitri's endearing trait is that he's this big huge dude who can bench-press forests and arm-wrestle god who still wants to learn to sew and who teaches kids to protect themselves and who buys candies for his friends. Claude's endearing trait is that he's this mastermind planner who has contingency and lie and obfuscation as three separate legal government names who still wants everyone to be safe and happy and hold hands and be friends.

Edelgard is strong, confident, and willing to do some of the shittiest things known to man for her goals. Her endearing trait is that her screams are cute. She's shy about her drawings of the player character. She blushes over the player potentially joking about having sex with her per her JPN version of her C support; you know, the one about how Byleth walks in on Edelgard muttering in her sleep from a nightmare about her tortured family? Perfect time to joke about fucking her! Dimitri and Claude's endearments are, well, endearing; Edelgard's are all straight up embarrassing for her.

Hell, even the smaller stuff is affected! Claude's passion for poisons and mushrooms are things he has no qualms about having others know about, despite how weird they are. Dimitri laughing at shitty jokes brings him no personal discomfort or embarrassment, despite just how loudly he laughs at them. They have traits to them that can easily be uwu worthy, and they don't care! Of the lords, only Edelgard does! Because, it feels like, the only way for a strong, resolute female character to come off as approachable is if she's knocked down a few pegs for specifically and only you, the player.

And that sucks ass! I'm sorry, but when I'm playing Edelgard's route I don't want to deal with her hiding herself away in her room for a month IN THE MIDDLE OF HER FUCKING WAR because she's just so embawwassed! It is so fucking insensitive that Edelgard is literally the only lord of the three who can have her trauma openly belittled at any point in the story by Byleth, all to have some cheap cutesy uwu moment about her fear of rats (calling her screaming in fear cute and INSISTING that it's really cute which is just. Fucking ew man)! Why can we fucking mock Edelgard's manner of speech during the MASSACRE OF REMIRE?

This shit doesn't happen to Claude or Dimitri! And saying "oh just don't pick those options then" is bullshit because no equivalent options exist for the male lords! It's piss-boilingly annoying that the second you choose to see things from the strong confident villainous ambitious female lord's perspective you can reduce her down to this bumbling moeblob just for you (sometimes unavoidably!) like!! Dude!

[danieldrivesfast]

After still needing to unfollow people because of their smooth-brain takes about Mexico, I'll say it on main:

You have never experienced a driver death, or even a serious injury, and it shows.

Then again, you probably would have been one of the people saying that Jules Bianchi dying is a shame, but the idea that drivers can be killed is what makes F1 exciting. Wait, no, Jules was handsome, you probably would've wished it on someone else. Unless you didn't like him for some bullshit reason, then he would've deserved it, right? That's the type of shit I see in your posts and tags about drivers you don't like. Karma will come for you.

There is no reason for men with this level of talent to do things that intentionally endanger other drivers. It's not cute or cunty or a slay, it's fucking dangerous. At the absolute kindest, it's grossly unsportsmanlike. If you don't understand why things are dangerous, sit down, shut up, and listen to all the people explaining it to you. Maybe listen to the 19 drivers who agreed it needs to be addressed.

I hope you never experience watching one of these men die or get seriously injured, for their sake, not yours. I hope you can grow up and realize great drivers don't need to intentionally put others at risk without needing to personally see someone lose their life on a track.

[muirmarie]

honestly the funniest thing is coming across ppl who are like "bones is so mean to spock 😡😡😡" like spock doesn't go out of his way to be just as big a cunt to mccoy??? it's their LOVE LANGUAGE!!! some of y'all didn't grow up watching tv shows with old broads and old queen-coded men being as cunty as possible to each other OUT OF LOVE. spock spends half his shift on the bridge coming up with mean things to say to his dr the moment mccoy flounce onto the bridge to flirt with jim (affectionate) and spock (derogatory and bloody, there will be no survivors except for them, THEY'RE having a BLAST).

listen when the cards are down they will be thoughtful and worried and touch each other SO gently and fight over who gets to die for each other. all of that is the floor they're standing on. they KNOW that. but GOSH in the meantime they're BOTH having an absolute blast bullying the shit out of each other, bless <3

[tragicvampireromanceisland]

Is there any moments when Jane almost reveals herself as Solarflare to Sammy, when protecting her (say the bullet scene from Superman 1978)

OH MY GOODNESS YES!!! so many times. i love that you specifically mentioned superman 1978, because that's actually my biggest inspiration for their dynamic!!!

sammy's pretty nosy (as reporters are LOL), so she usually winds up in trouble without even meaning to do so as she tries to gather info for her stories. she's always a bit confused as to why jane insists on tagging along...their initial relationship is actually a little rocky, because jane was just sort of dumped onto sammy to look after by her higher ups at work, and she sort of hinders her work sometimes (and sammy values her work VERY much). plus, she can be a bit too trusting of others, which sammy definitely isn't...

actually got inspired to doodle a version of the 1978 bullet scene for this au real quick!! so thank you for giving me the excuse to draw these two together LOL. also had to draw the scene right after that with the purse, because it's also a very sol thing to do. she's had a lot of close calls! but yet, somehow, sammy still has not figured it out....i'd like to think this happened pretty early on in their relationship, when sammy's just starting to come around to jane...

[timethehobo]

Curious to see where the next KTJL ep will take us. Would love to see the dynamic of having to work tgt and if it’s anything like the occasional comic team-up.

[inadvisablebutinevitable]

I think Neil is always going to be a nostalgic little shit in the dumbest ways. I think they’re going to be retired in their mid-forties grown ass adults with a house and a mortgage, and one day Andrew wakes up alone and goes outside to see if neil’s gone for a run or something and then a shingle falls right beside him, and he looks up and Neil’s just. On the roof. Smoking a cigarette with his legs dangling over the edge of their little suburban bungalow and Andrew is just like “Jesus fuck junkie�� because he’s too goddamn old for this.

[guardian-angle22]

TK/Carlos + Touch

↳ 4.18 In Sickness and In Health (Deleted Scene)