#no matter what they actually are ridiculous

[idiomagic]

Things I Have Learned By Somehow Surviving To 55 Years Old -- It is actually ridiculously easy to say 'I'm sorry'. Doubling down in a panic, trying to prove you're 'right', loses you friends and makes everything worse, every time. -- Life goes by in the blink of an eye. Don't waste your time on stupid bullshit. Discourse, internet arguments, fighting over useless details... are just going to roil you up, make you miserable, and that time can be better spent doing anything else. -- There is no One True Way. If you're convinced that your 'praxis' or whatever is the only correct one, that your view is the only correct one, that your belief is the only correct one, only one thing is guaranteed: you are absolutely wrong. If you find yourself being smug and patting yourself on the back that you are the Only Smart and Correct Person on the internet, you are embarrassingly wrong...and everyone else knows it. -- It is never too late. It's never too late to change careers, go back to school, transition, change your beliefs, change yourself. You don't have to live like this, you don't have to think like this, you don't have to be like this. It's not too late to change. -- Life happens offline. The internet is for fucking around while you're in between real life stuff. The world of the internet is not real, it's not real life, and if your only life is online, you really need to log off, leave your phone behind, and go out into the world. Interact with real people, in real situations, without a keyboard.

-- You learn way more by listening than by talking, and people will respect you more when you do have something to say. -- You need to get out of your online bubbles and talk to people who do not share your beliefs. Tumblr gives you the impression that you are the majority, that everyone believes what you do, thinks like you do, has the same outlook on life that you do. And that is far from the truth. For example: 98% of the country is cis and heterosexual. The vast majority of people do not have fandoms. The majority of humanity cares more about what you do than whether or not you use the 'correct' terminology. -- There is always hope. No matter how bleak the world seems right now, we have made staggering amounts of progress just in my lifetime. But we've done it by showing up, by voting, by acting. Progress happens in meat space, not through discourse. Online activism isn't activism. It's the prelude to activism. If you want change, you have to put down your screens, get out in the world, and make it happen. -- The sexiest thing any human being can do is to learn, to grow, and to be able to say 'I was wrong. I've learned more now, and I'm going to do better.' -- Finding love, in any form, is the barest beginning of what a relationship is. If you want to keep that love, you have to work for it, every day. And every party to that love has to do the work. If your partner/partners/friends don't work to make the relationship strong, it's not love and it will never be healthy. -- The only limit to who you can be and what you can be is you. You can't change your physical limits, but you can always decide that you will learn, that you will change, that you will grow. You can always be more than you are right now, bigger than you are right now. No one and nothing can stop you from that, except you.

[lvl1l1]

LaDS men when you get flowers from someone else

pairings: Sylus, Rafayel, Xavier, Caleb, Zayne x F!Reader(separate)

content: jealousy, fluff, caleb and xavier are a teensy bit insane, charlie taking another L

Sylus

You two decided to spend the weekend at your apartment, he obviously wouldn’t be caught dead showing up empty handed.

As you open the door, the first thing you see is a beautifully arranged bouquet of camellias and carnations. The second is the smug grin on your boyfriend’s face, which is wiped right off as soon as he steps into your living room and notices the pathetically small bouquet you had already hosted in a vase.

“Kitten, was your budget for those flowers chump change and a dream? You should’ve known, I’d bring you a little something.”

Once you tell him, that those were a gift from a co-worker for helping him out, his demeanour shifts slightly, unnoticeable to the untrained eye. Luckily, you were the one person who could see right through him.

Not like that mattered, when he went to grab his phone before you could even say anything. You see him tap around a little before raising it to his ear, speaking into the device.

“Yeah, I want them all delivered.”

You look at him with furrowed brows and he finally went back to paying attention to you. A sharp smile makes its way to his face.

“I don’t mind you leaving these, to put it bluntly, sad flowers here. They’ll make all the bouquets i’m getting you stand out even more.”

The unimpressed stare you give him, clearly doesn’t phase him, as he just walks into your bedroom, pulling you along.

“You deserve only the best, the biggest and the grandest. For everything.”

“You’re almost winning me over, Sy. But shouldn’t we wait until those poor florists actually deliver whatever ridiculous amount of flowers you ordered?”

At that, Sylus pulled you closer, nuzzling his face into your hair,

“The flowers will be fine waiting outside of your door. It’ll also be a nice way to send a message to everyone living in this apartment complex. Now, how about a lesson in why you shouldn’t accept flowers from other men?”

You sigh first, suddenly going rigid as a realisation hits you,

“I don’t have enough vases. Or even space for more flowers!”

Being the last thing you mumbled before your bedroom door closed with a ‘click’.

Rafayel

You two were out running some errands together, grabbing art supplies for him, groceries and what-not.

Linkon City was as lively as ever, a melting pot for diverse people. You and Rafayel held hands, pushing through the crowd.

Rafayel was about to pull you into another store, when you’re stopped by a man.

He’s holding a small bouquet of red roses and smiles at you, not looking at Rafayel,

“Hi, miss. We’re giving out free flowers today, these are for you.”

You feel Rafayel squeeze your hand and you know he’s glaring without even looking at him,

“Oh, thank you but I don’t-“

The man practically shoves the flowers into your free hand,

“I insist. Have a good day!”

And with that, he turns and leaves you standing there holding the small bouquet.

A hum leaves your throat, shrugging and leaning in to smell the flowers, before you’re stopped by your boyfriend.

“Why would you accept these ugly flowers? There’s no artistic flair, just basic roses and their stems aren’t even cut evenly! Honestly, It’s like he’s trying to harass my girlfriend by making her look at something so hideous. Besides, you have a rich boyfriend capable of making you a wayyy better bouquet standing right here.”

You narrow your eyes at him, lips curling upwards, leaning closer to him,

“Don’t tell me you’re jealous.”

Rafayel’s eyes widened at that, mouth falling open slightly,

“These are clearly just for a campaign, he’s just working. I wouldn’t have accepted them otherwise, don’t worry.”

Your boyfriend jutted out his lower lip, taking the bouquet out of your hand. He made the flowers go up in flames and before you could react he pulled you towards the nearest flower shop.

“Doesn’t matter. My girlfriend deserves flowers as pretty as her. I’m arranging this bouquet myself and it’ll be the prettiest you’ve ever seen!”

You playfully roll your eyes at his antics but you couldn’t help but appreciate his effort. So, you let him pull you along.

Xavier

It was date night and you and Xavier decided to go to your usual hotpot place. You were waiting outside of your apartment building for him, as he went to grab his wallet that he had forgotten at his place.

You were leaning against the gate, when a familiar voice suddenly called out to you,

“Oh, hey! I haven’t seen you in a while.”

Charlie walked up to you, you flashed him a little smile as you noticed the flowers he was holding.

“Someone brought me these at the bakery today! They look nice, don’t you think?”

You nodded curtly, not wanting to talk to him for too long, knowing Xavier might see.

Not taking the hint, Charlie’s face lit up, an idea flashing through his mind, not having learned anything from your last interaction.

“Hey, why don’t you take them? I don’t really have a place for them anyway.”

Not waiting for your reply, he pushed the bouquet towards you. Hesitantly, you take them,

“I don’t think this is a good idea-“

He waved you off and went to walk inside.

You stared at the flowers, biting your lips, thinking of what to do before Xavier returned.

You knew it was too late once you noticed the streetlights flickering and an ominous presence manifesting behind you.

“Throw them away.”

You quickly straightened your posture, turning around with a teasing smile,

“Hey there, Xav.”

“Throw them away.”

He repeated in a serious tone.

A sigh left you,

“I was planning on doing that anyway. Don’t you think it’d be a waste though?”

Xavier shook his head, a stern expression on his usually neutral face.

“Doesn’t matter, they’re ugly anyway. Besides, who gives away a gift they received? He’s got no shame.”

You raised an eyebrow at him,

“Why didn’t you come out earlier, if you were here already?”

He came closer, taking the flowers out of your grasp, not answering. He teleported over to the dumpsters, throwing the flowers in.

“I’ll get you prettier ones. Ones that actually mean something.”

You met him halfway and grabbed his hand,

“Alright. But let’s get going, before we miss our reservation.”

Xavier’s expression finally softened, a small smile making its way to his face as he looked at you.

You two started walking, you started talking to him about your day and he listened, nodding along.

Luckily, you didn’t notice how the entire buildings lights suddenly went out. He was gonna deal with that evil baker later.

Caleb

Caleb just got done cooking, when he finally heard a knock on his door.

You had finally gotten some days off after a gruelling week filled with missions back to back and you were staying with him in Skyhaven.

He was planning on helping you relax the entire time you were going to be with him. He would cook for you, take you wherever you wanted to go and monopolise your attention.

The brunet happily opened the door, immediately greeting you with a hug,

“Pipsqueak, I gave you the key to my place for a reason. You don’t have to knock.”

You giggled at him, walking inside and taking your shoes off with one hand.

That’s when he noticed the flowers you were holding, he cocked his head, not saying anything.

“Oh, a friend of mine gave these to me right before I left! Do you have a vase we could put them in?”

Caleb’s brows furrowed, his eyes darkening slightly.

“What was the occasion? These aren’t even your favourite flowers. Would expect them to be thoughtful, when pulling off a gesture like this.”

You looked at him, amused.

“Caleb, they’re just flowers. From someone who’s just a friend.”

He walked into the living room with you, looking at the bouquet like it personally offended him.

“Well, seems like we’ll have to take the bouquet apart, pipsqueak. Your friend put iris and chrysanthemums together. Vastly different vase life, would be bad if we put them together. Might as well throw them out, honestly. I’ll get you flowers that actually survive together.”

He didn’t miss the scepticism on your face as you put the bouquet on the coffee table. You walked over to him, wrapping your arms around his neck.

“Caleb, honey, you don’t need to let it out on the flowers, they’re innocent. My friend was just trying to be nice but if they bother you, we can throw them away.”

His hands found your waist, as he looked at you with those eyes, resembling a kicked puppy.

“But if you like them…”

You shook your head,

“They’re just flowers. You can just get me some. Or even better, I’ll bring you some next time!”

His face lit up again, pressing your foreheads together,

“You don’t need to bring me flowers, pips. That’s my job! Besides, I actually know which flowers you like, I’d never just carelessly put a bouquet together.”

You looked up at him through your lashes, realising what he was pulling,

“Caleb, you-“

He picked you up and brought you over to the kitchen, putting you down on the counter.

“Too late, you already agreed.”

He winked at you, and you noticed something fly out the window through your peripheral vision.

“Now, let’s eat and after that I’ll take you out shopping. We’ll pick up some flowers on the way.”

Zayne

Zayne was just finishing up the last of his work at the hospital, when he received a text from you,

“ahhh i just saw them, love the flowers zaynie! thank you so much”

He stared at his phone in confusion, trying to think of a response,

“What are you talking about, love?”

You sent him a picture of a bouquet of amaryllis, followed up by a text,

“they’re so pretty! they were just delivered, thank u<3”

His fingers twitched, as he left his office, making his way to his car.

“Leave them on the table. I’ll be home soon.”

With that, he put his phone away and got in his car.

-

You were slightly confused at Zayne’s last text but did as he said.

Once you heard keys turn in the lock, you quickly walked over to the door to welcome your boyfriend.

The door pushed open and your boyfriend walked inside, you noticed his bag wasn’t the only thing he was holding.

He presented you with a bouquet of your favourite flowers, before he even took off his coat.

“…welcome back, dear.”

The confusion in your voice evident, still accepting the flowers gratefully.

Zayne quietly took off his shoes and hung up his coat, pressing a kiss to your temple before walking into the kitchen.

“These flowers…”

He picked them off the table and glanced at them.

“They were delivered, yes? Did a note come with them?”

You went to stand next to him, holding the bouquet he just brought you,

“Nope. I’ll take it, those aren’t from you?”

He let out an affirmative hum,

“What do you say, we gift these to the elderly lady next door? And you find a vase for the ones I got you.”

“Sounds good! Just… who do you think sent these?”

His gaze met yours and his eyes lit up with affection for you.

“I’m not sure but I intent to find out. I can’t just stand by and watch as someone tries to make the woman I love swoon.”

You chuckled at that, switching to holding the bouquet he got you with one hand, caressing his face with your other,

“No one besides you could ever make me swoon, Zayne.”

He leaned into your touch, closing his eyes,

“I know. Still, I won’t let this slide. I want you to be happy over things that are actually from me.”

At that, you press a sweet kiss to his lips. He was just so lovely.

[lukolathoughts]

Miss Nicola - supporting LGBTQI rights

Dearest gentle reader,

I have been itching to write a blog post now for a few weeks, but not really knowing where to begin. There have been frenzied weeks and days of activity, but then silence and the fandom meanders like a lost boat at sea. We are often rudderless without the reassuring presence of our ship captains - Luke and Nicola. This also tends to get the sub fandoms spouting nonsense claiming to have seen Nicola in Birmingham or some ridiculous crap. I didn't want to bother her by asking for a photo! No photo, no proof my friend.

I'll talk about me for a moment. I had a week from hell last week. There was something so upsetting for me to deal with, I couldn't go into work as I was crying that much. Try to explain this to your manager: that nasty comments on YouTube made you late for work. Luckily, she is an understanding person and I have told her about my YT channel. Saying some things out loud to real life people make me sound barking mad. But it is the price you pay for being public on YouTube. It also makes me an easy target. I am used to online trolls and people who hate me for saying that Jake is gay and believing in Lukola, but when the stab in the back comes from a supposed friend, it really is the ten of swords. My phone blew up that much, I opened my eyes that morning genuinely thinking Lukola had launched. My hope turned to ash, when I saw what was really happening. I share this with you all because, I have had to have a reckoning with myself the last week. My online life and my real life are not the same. My real life is way more important and I actually need my job, so messing it up because I've got people I don't really know online saying mean things about me, that are not true, shouldn't matter. But it still hurts. But I also realise, they are trying to stop me sharing and trying to ruin my credibility and reputation in order to send me off into my discord crying never to return again.

Well think again. No one tells a Sagittarius woman what they can and can't do. I am made of stronger stuff. Love will always conquer hate. No one puts Baby in the corner, and I will not stand for it. I have scaled back most of my online life now. It had helped me cope with the last year and losing my friend, but sometimes you have to go back into reality. I'm never leaving the ship though. You'll have to chuck me overboard and I'll still jump back on like Rose from Titanic. "I couldn't go, Jack! You jump, I jump, right?"

Anyway, enough about me. Let's talk about Nic. I love Nicola by the way and nothing I say here is a criticism of her or her choices. I see what you're doing though, miss Nicola. I said in my last blog that the shit would hit the fan when Jake has to start press for his new upcoming BBC3 drama What it feels like for a girl. I will admit I have not read the book. Regardless of who Jake is playing, it is reportedly an all queer cast, a queer director and at least one queer writer that I know of. Why would the director of an all queer cast hire a straight man in a homosexual role? If this show is as big as It's a Sin, that aired on Channel 4 a few years ago, then there will be press and a lot of it. There will be press from queer magazines also. Jake is currently in an awkward position, because some press believe he is in a romantic relationship with Nicola Coughlan, a woman who is also 14 years his senior. So, what will Nicola and Jake do?

Jake is holding onto his cash cow with both hands and Nicola needs Jake to continue to pose as her boyfriend to stop the media digging. But honey, they know. It was clear all the press at the SAG awards knew exactly what was going on and they were not afraid to say it. The 'happy ending' comment levelled at them directly by a reporter, had Nicola stunned and Luke smiling like all his Christmases' had come at once.

Nicola knows what is going on. She knows there is a deadline and she knows if she doesn't extricate herself from the narrative she is dating a gay man, she is screwed basically. What is she doing? She's getting out her, I love gays!! T-shirt, hats, scarfs, sunglasses, whatever. She is doing it. Look at me, I love queers! I love her for this and I already know she is an advocate for LGBTQI rights. She has a ton of gay friends. The fandom knows this of course, but do the general public?

At the Neutrogena event on 27th March 2025, there was a very tall drag queen doing some MCing. We know Nic loves drag queens and has been to many shows, so this is nothing new to us. I'm not being overly cynical that the drag queen might have been there for a reason, right? Neutrogena is a product that is targeted at women mostly for their skin products. What has that got to do with a drag queen? I just found it odd.

Next up we have Nicola's Pink Pony Club Post that she shared to both her Instagram stories and grid last Thursday 10th April. The song by Chappell Roan is synonymous with the gay community and one that Jake danced to at her concert last year in a pink cowboy hat. "You guys, remember when my old flat was a gay hotspot!" Nicola, posts 4 polaroid's of her looking fabulous in pink and lays them on a pink blanket. What made you feel so nostalgic, Nic? Or are you sending a message? Look at me, I have loved my gay besties for donkey's years. Prominent gay friends such as JVN and Jack Rooke commented all in agreement, that indeed, Nic's flat was the place to be. And, no I do not think Nicola is coming out herself as gay. Get real, she is supporting her friends and peers.

Then there was yesterday's selfie of Nicola wearing her black - 'I just wanted to say if you are trans and reading this, I love you and so do all my mates' T-shirt. There a few other details in that post that other bloggers such as @toriaaniin have covered beautifully, so I won't go into it here. My eyes sprung wide when I saw this post. I know she advocates for the charity Notaphase.org and I commend her for doing this, but two queer posts in a few days seems to be a lot for Nic, when lately she hasn't been posting at all.

There is also the male hairdresser Halley Brisker in her Opalex video on her Instagram, They make a big deal of letting us know he flirts with male makeup artists. Nicola is clearly good friends with Halley and it is an endearing watch. But to me this seems like a lot of overkill in the last few days for the general public to look at her Instagram and instantly know, yes Nicola does love the girls, the gays and Luke Newton. (FYI Halley Brisker is married to a woman and has children, but to the general public this conversation is implying Nic is comfortable with these conversations).

This, in my opinion, is setting the stage for the final act. I can see Nicola doing some sort of article or interview where she clears a certain narrative up. If you notice, Douglas has also been quite forceful again in implying certain things about Jake and Jake himself does not stop others from posting suggestive posts and videos of him. Nicola must remove herself from this mess in order to move forward with her own career and life. Hanging onto old connections are no longer serving her personally and professionally. Her engagement on Instagram is down by a lot, so I'm told and she is losing followers. She has done all she can career-wise for Jake now, he has to make his own way.

If this does not happen and we remain in this weird heteronormative bubble, I fear the press for What it feels like for a girl, will be a shit show. The truth will come out eventually and it will drag both Jake and Nicola down with it.

[onbearfeet]

I once spent a summer cleaning movie-theater bathrooms.

I wasn't told up front that it would be my job, personally, to clean the women's bathroom every 15 minutes for 8 hours a day. But the theater advertised its clean restrooms, and they required male cleaners for the gents' and female cleaners for the ladies' ... and because they hired as few women and girls as possible, this meant in practice that every shift was 5 to 7 teenage boys taking turns and one teenage girl who spent at least half her time cleaning the same giant bathroom over and over. (Another girl had the other half of the megaplex.) You wouldn't think a bathroom could get seriously messy in 10 to 15 minutes, but if you've ever set foot on the mysteriously sticky floor of an American movie theater, you have some idea of what eldritch forces are at work there.

I have many disgusting stories about my summer of shit, but one of the few I can tell in public was that a shocking number of people just don't bother, or perhaps don't remember, to flush. Other people then see a toilet full of human waste, assume it's clogged, and use another toilet. Some of THEM will forget to flush, and the feedback loop intensifies. The more this happens, the fewer toilets are in use, the more the line backs up, the more accidents happen ... you get the idea. So a big part of my job was walking from stall to stall, flushing toilets, usually with a plunger in hand in case the thing actually WAS plugged. (I was not supposed to have a plunger. I stole it from the facilities guys.)

98% of the time, the toilet flushed fine, so I developed the habit of just walking up to full toilets in public restrooms and flushing them as a matter of course. Over 20 years later, I still do this.

Because I have this habit, I have become The Flusher among my friends. When we're out somewhere and the toilet situation is dire, they call me over to flush a few and make room. There's nothing stopping them from doing exactly the same thing, of course; it's just that I spent 3 months desensitizing myself to the sight of floating shit, so I can do it without puking. (I wash my hands thoroughly afterwards.)

I've often thought about why so many toilets go unflushed. I'm sure some people just forget, or don't care. Others perhaps can't flush for themselves--little kids who can't budge the lever, people with disabilities that make twisting hard, etc. But on a practical level, the flush has to happen at some point, or we're all going to get cholera. Someone must flush, regardless of why the flush hasn't happened already.

So why are we so shitty (pun intended) to the goddamn heroes who save us from our own crap? I've made volunteer flush patrols in crowded convention centers and community theaters that probably prevented actual health hazards. I no longer do it for a job, but I see it as a responsibility that comes with the world's dumbest superpower. And it's always struck me as ridiculous to describe jobs like that as "degrading" and therefore jobs that no one should do.

You don't actually mean degrading. You mean icky. Poop gives you the ick, and you don't want to go near strangers' shit. Fine! You shouldn't have to--not as long as someone else does. I only developed my stupid superpower because of sexist hiring practices that forced me to get over the ick, but if someone tried to convince me that my dumb superpower was a reason to pay me less or exclude me from union membership, I'd punch them in the throat. (And then wash my hands, because that's MY ick.) Why the hell should my ability to do something that lots of people physically can't make me LESS valuable as a worker?

The toilets need flushing. If you luck into someone who'll do it all day, pay them like the treasured specialist they are. If you don't, hire enough people (of all genders) that no one HAS to flush all day.

And don't call necessary work "degrading". The only one degrading people here is you.

When the health food store unionized, something wild happened that I thought was just a goofy one-off, but makes more sense now.

There was a big push to eliminate "degrading jobs" but the strategy was to eliminate the position, then create a new position outside of the bargaining unit to do the work. So like, we wouldn't have dishwashers, but we'd have people who washed dishes that weren't eligible to be in the union.

I was like A) what the actual fuck? Dish washing isn't "degrading", it's fucking vital. B) What the actual fuck? You want to create a union just to exploit different people?

There were enough of us to be like "Absolutely the fuck not," and put a stop to it, but I was absolutely flummoxed that people involved in a union would say that out loud. Working with more leftists now, it makes sense.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

recently had to give up something that… depend how you see it, been work towards for past months, two years, four years, even say ten years absolutely not stretch or exaggeration.

because have high support needs. n there no way for me physically survive safely if do it.

it be only thing in that domain that known for almost half my life, n entirety (n more) of my life that at least some part vaguely remember.

because not have enough support n care for me do it n safely survive.

wish am be exaggerate. wish be hyperbole. wish be overplaying it to get people to believe.

but am not.

this be reality of high support needs.

believe me am tried everything can think of n everything can do.

talk to so many people n groups for help. begged for it. thought abt what support needs be “luxury” enough can leave unmet. how much danger n risk can go thru to make it happen, knowing full well if any minor or major emergency happen to me (…visibly severely disabled POC, vulnerable minority in multiple visible ways), there absolutely no way be able deal with it.

n been in some really really bad places mentally while that. n more of that to come, now that for sure, give up.

have trouble understand want something really really really realllly bad not make it really exist, no matter how obviously ridiculous—include major law n policy change, teleport, be reborn, mind read, miracles, n this.

so you see, this be reality of actually high support needs. of depend on other people grace n charity n kindness n services n help over basic daily life activities to survive.

no amount “want independence” “want autonomy” “want better future” “want avoid severe suicidal mental illness crises times” “want escape abuse by caregivers” or “want avoid conservatorship guardianship institutionalization” or “want LIFE” no amount of simply wanting no matter how extremely bad, will make possible for us leave our support needs unmet, give those up, n trade be unsupported for those wants, n safely survive, or even just plain survive.

be high support needs give me barrier after barrier. not once give me privilege n power or even advantage, n never ever had full entire support needs met, even for just short time.

many high support needs people be force live in “survival mode” too. it just that, you know, to be in “survival mode” you kinda need be. alive.

no amount of “want” “need” n “adrenaline survival mode” make us able do things we simply cannot do.

n my support needs not even that high. n am take comfort in that. am lucky for that. because know what even higher support needs than mine actually mean.

idk what am saying.

[okay to reblog]

[bitchin-beskar]

listen...

joel as an office siren seems like a fucking joke. you've heard the rumors that circle, always scoffing at them because they make no damn sense. you've seen the man personally multiple times, and there's nothing about him that screams office siren the way the whispers seem to imply.

sure, he's handsome, ridiculously so. that's never been a secret. he was drool-worthy when you first met him, and years later, that hasn't changed. but the idea that there's something so alluring about him in the office that it's impossible to focus is just nonsense.

at least, that's what you thought.

you'd never actually visited joel at the office before, usually running into him when he was walking around with tommy. but, tommy had asked you to go in and help joel out at the office for a few hours. they'd been swamped with menial tasks, and benjamin, tommy's son, was feeling under the weather, and so tommy wanted to stay home with him, but felt bad leaving his brother with all the work.

menial tasks seemed like a much better alternative to just wandering the settlement, like you'd originally been planning, so you quickly agreed.

you should've paid more attention to the rumors.

you couldn't pin down what exactly it was that was so different. maybe it was the glasses? or the softer clothes, not as worn down as the ones he wore when doing physical tasks outside. maybe it was the little furrow of his brow as he frowned at the documents on his desk? or maybe it was the way he chewed on the end of his pen while deep in thought. maybe it was a combination of all those, or none of them.

whatever the case, you were absolutely hopeless.

you couldn't stop stealing glances, little peeks every couple of minutes, observing the way he sat there in his chair, reclined or sitting at attention, working his way through a mountain of paperwork. every so often he'd take a sip from the coffee mug, or drum his fingers on the wood of the desk, and the sounds echoed in your ears like gunshots, ricocheting through your mind and destroying any productive thoughts that might've formed.

every so often, joel would shift in his seat, groaning or grunting as he changed positions and stretched his sore muscles. to anyone else, they probably sounded perfectly normal.

but all you could think about was what kinds of noises he might make if you helped him to relax? ease him back in his chair and do all the work, show him just how much you appreciated all he did for you, ellie, tommy, the others in the settlement. he deserved to just… let go, for a little while.

“darlin’? you okay?”

blinking rapidly, you turned your head to see joel peering at you over the rims of his glasses, a worried frown etched on his face. your cheeks quickly burned hot, and you hoped to god it wasn’t obvious where your mind had just been.

“sorry joel, got lost in thought. did you need something?”

a fond smile crossed his lips. “as a matter of fact, yes. c’mere a second?”

you stood from your chair, and quickly strode over to his desk, hoping he didn’t notice how shaky your legs were.

“what’cha need?”

he held out an arm, a silent gesture for you to step closer. you did, biting your lip as his fingers brushed against your lower back.

“my eyesight isn’t what it used ta’ be.” he pointed to a paragraph on the paper in front of him, and you bent over slightly at the waist to get a closer look. “read this for me, darlin’?”

you had to surpress a shiver at the way that pet name sounded in his texan drawl, still prevalent even years after the start of the apocalypse. you started to read, your voice stuttering when joel casually lays his hand on your lower back, leaning in to follow along on the page.

it’s damn near impossible to focus, he’s right there, and you miss words or have to repeat yourself far more than would be considered normal.

“darlin’?” joel interrupts you, his hand slowly smoothing over your back. “what’s wrong? you’re actin’ mighty strange.”

you bit your lip, trying desperately to focus on the paper and not the heat of his hand on your back, searing even through your shirt. “I-I’m fine, joel. just distracted today, I guess.”

calloused fingers gently grip your chin, and joel gently turns you to face him. “I may need readin’ glasses darlin’, but I can still see the bullshit in an excuse just fine. c’mon, tell me what’s wrong.”

you can’t look away from his gaze, dark eyes piercing and giving you the unsettling sensation of being deeply scrutinized.

his thumb brushes against your jaw, and your lips part as a soft breath escapes, and you watch as realization dawns in joel’s eyes.

“oh, I see,” he muses, voice dark and husky. “you are distracted, aren’t you, darlin’?”

“joel,” you whisper.

his thumb gently presses against your lower lip, and you suck in a shaky exhale.

“you can’t lie to me,” he murmurs, eyes trained on your lips. “you’re not usually so flustered, least ‘round me. what changed?”

“I don’t know.”

a small quirtk of his lips, and you very much feel like prey animal coming face to face with a predator at the top of the food chain, one with a particular interest in devouring you whole.

“too many thoughts swirlin’ in that pretty head o’ yours, isn’ that right?”

you’re helpless to do anything but nod.

another wicked look crosses his face. “I’ve gotta couple ideas of how to make you relax, darlin’. what’dya say?”

Who’s gonna write it?! 😂

[toomiieimagiines]

“The scent may drive me half

insane, but maybe you’ll see me

then.”

Rui Kamishiro Hanahaki

part one part two

(coming soon!)

anything to say, tommie?♪

hi, guys! this is part one of a two-part series with our favorite punching bag, rui! this is very heavy, all of the resolution will be in the next part. i just wanted to get something out for you all! this IS in response to an ask, but i think tumblr ate it! i’m gonna look for it, so if i find it i’ll reply!

anyway, wow! it has been a terrible couple months!! i am very unwell. i’m sorry about me ghosting you guys all the time, but here we are! here’s my psycho-babble-bullshit philosophical thinking and existential dread in the format of an x reader project sekai fanfiction. i am beyond saving.

i’ll quit talking! just wanna let you know this two-parte is probably the last pjsk thing i’m gonna write in a while

mewnies warning𖦹

this is VERY gorey and has MANY mentions of d€4th/s3w1c1de/1llness. (sorry if tumblr doesn’t care about those words but i’ll censor just in case(looking back i’m realizing that i say it all the time in the fic anyway so idc…)) has in detailed descriptions of puking as well. reader is kinda stupid in this, but what’s new? meow!

It started with a cough.

It was subtle at first. Honestly, he had thought he’d pulled something in his chest at rehearsal the day prior. It wasn’t anything to write home about; a dull ache that could be easily overlooked.

“It could be worse,” he says, staring at the mirror. On a worse day, he’d scold himself for talking to himself, then lament at the fact he actually scolded himself, but today, he felt a little self-pity at the state of his body.

Christ, he needs to chill out. Why had he woken up so erratic?

The walk to school was more or less unremarkable. You two hadn’t coordinated walking together that morning, so it did get pretty lonely. He ended up narrating everything he was doing in his head to pass the time, something that was—admittedly—not out of character. It was a bad habit he’d have to break one of these days, he knows. Not today though, maybe next week when his chest isn’t so heavy. His chest does feel pretty heavy—the sky is cloudy today, isn’t it? Maybe it’ll rain. He hopes no snails come from the ground. He hates watching out for them while he walks. The air seems misty, though, huh?

That morning at school, he hadn’t felt great. He had this fullness in his lungs he just couldn’t get to go away. No matter how hard he coughed, the pressure just wouldn’t release. Now, he’d never been in the best health, so it wasn’t unusual for him to be sick, but you’d think he would’ve felt something the day before. He couldn’t recall feeling this amount of suffocating pain in his chest yesterday, save for when you were talking to that stupid upperclassman-

God, his chest really hurts!

He coughs again, this one curling his body over the desk and making him remember where he was. Will the inconvenience ever end?! He puts his head on the desk, letting a pitiful hand raise, begging for a pardon.

He locks eyes with an upperclassman in the hallway on accident, making his pulse quicken. He can’t believe the nerve of some people!

He catches himself, stopping for a moment. They were just walking—Whatever. He’s not himself today.

While his short interaction may have just been the most terrifying thing he’s ever done, coughing wildly in a public bathroom trumped it. Sure his voice may have cracked when he called the teachers name, and yes, everyone turned to look at him (thus interrupting their class time), but making a ruckus for other people to hear is where he drew the line. God, he really needs to get his act together before he officially has no chance with you, he’s so ridiculous.

Of course, he found it immature that his biggest worry at the moment was his troublesome feelings for his best friend, and not something of substance like grades or music, but that’s just who he is. (He’d never blame you for it.) Though the innate yearning that teenagers have for romance has been told of for years and years, he’ll—at times—stupidly talk himself into believing he’s the only one who has such perverse thoughts of others. It’s not like he doesn’t know it’s senseless, it’s just… whatever. In any case, it’s his own misfortune in of itself. (Which is not something he really needs right now, what with hacking up a lung and all.)

You’d probably think he looks so stupid right now, leaning over a dirty school toilet, kneeling on the dirty bathroom floor. You were the only opinion he just couldn’t shake. It seemed ironically fitting for a boy such as himself to be there; maybe getting sick was karma for being the way he is. He’d see later if he could try praying away his sin on the walk home. Ha!

Another cough wracks his body at the thought of your disgust, and a strange sense of adrenaline overtakes him; akin the feeling of fight or flight you get just before puking. He wracks his brain for the meaning of it all. Just why are you suddenly filling him with so much dread?—Well, more than usual. It’s conveniently almost enough to distract from the fact that he’s turning his body inside out.

Ah, too late.

The contents of his filthy stomach finally reach where he’s coughing from, pooling into a disgusting, viscose shape floating at the top of the water. He doesn’t have enough time to think about the sick, for he has continued to choke savagely on his own breath. He hacks for a while, for a moment he actually thinks this is where he will die. Will God truly subject him to the embarrassment of lying next to a dirty toilet full of bile? Can dead people even be embarrassed?—

What’s that?

His choking finally breaks, but he can’t feel relief for very long.

A small pink petal floats on the top of all the mess, he’s watched enough shows to know what it means. This may just be the first time in his life he hasn’t felt compelled to find out more. His brain goes fuzzy with understanding, for a moment he isn’t even there. He can’t reach a single image in his mind as he stares at the innocent symbol of youth and beauty.

He must’ve eaten something pretty crazy, huh? What a stupid boy he is, thinking that way. Ha! To think he’d fall victim to such nonsense! He should go outside more. Catching a rare, romanticized illness as a highschool boy? He isnt some girl. He doesn’t covet you so much as to die. He has a small crush—not even! A fondness!

He laughs for a while, running his hand through his hair as he stands up. He washes his hands just that much harder and only comes to when he notices the redness of them. When did that happen? He must’ve hit them on the desk, he can really be so careless! The automatic faucet no longer registers his hand as a humans and he curses it with annoyance. He feels so sorry he ever thought such a brain-dead idea. His anger is only heightened when he realizes he’ll have to walk back to class with pruny, red fingers. He really does hate that class, he must have another half hour-

The bell rings? But it’s only… 11? Ah, he must’ve been in class longer than he thought. He had only been in the bathroom for five minutes at most! Days feel shorter and shorter recently, maybe he’s been sleeping too much! He takes a sharp turn, his body subconsciously wandering to where you eat together with him. He doesn’t even heed the stares of his classmates, he’s stopped noticing actually, it’s not that big of a surprise, not like he’s been all that bothered much anymore. He doesn’t heed much of anything, now that he’s thinking—or struggling to think—about it.

He just sits with this blank stare, naturally waiting for you, as if you had to tag him out. He can’t hold an idea in his head for longer than a second, that is, until you walk by. The world stops spinning and he’s hit with a sudden overwhelming feeling of intoxication. Lucidity hits him like a thousand bricks, he can’t help from wondering if “they” are letting out hormones causing him to feel so good around you. What are “they”? Nothing. He doesn’t care to explain to any reader what’s going on. Some can be too stupid to understand.

A rise of euphoria bubbles into his throat and he can’t help but look at you with wide eyes. His good humor is back.

“Hi,” he breathes, his trance lifted.

Now, you (completely in the dark about this whole situation) didn’t exactly know why he was staring at you so intently. It made you feel the slightest bit self conscious, so you decided to inspect him further. His cheeks were blotchy, his pupils were blown, there was this strange stain on his collar—Jeez, what happened to his hands?

“Hi?” You make yourself comfortable next to him, pulling out your lunchbox. “We can go inside if it’s too wet, i just thought it might be nice—“

“No! It’s fine!” He shakes his head fervently. He does feel the need to do something, though. He doesn’t have any homework, and it’s not like he can play with his machines from school. He bounces his knee restlessly, trying desperately to start a conversation.

“So, h—“

“Are you—“

“Sorry, go ahead,” you prompt, not wanting to pass up an opportunity to hear him chat you up while in good spirits (very good, you noticed.) He’s been a little down in the dumps recently—not that you were paying extra attention to him or anything—so it was welcome.

This, however, was preposterous to him. The mere thought of taking up the sacred time he has with you with something as needless as what he had to say was sickening—sacrilege! He waves you off, his hands hasty from the rush.

“I was only gonna ask how your day was!” He blurts, the trembling of his body growing more and more apparent. He needs to hear all about it.

On a different day, he’d be a little more reluctant to be so obvious with you, but a parasite has turned him shameless. He would make an ass of himself to keep chasing this feeling, his chest feels so light he thinks he could faint. He hears the blood going to his ears, pounding into his skull with the fragility of a hammer. The monotonous world he was just in was bustling once again. He can’t help but feel giddy when you open your mouth.

You talk about nothing of particular importance. What you had for breakfast, who was in your first period, but despite the inconsequence, he’s desperately hung on every word. His head nods hastily, agreeing as if you were delivering a speech. He was sure that you’d be thrilled to have him listen so intently, but, if anything, your uneasiness only grew with each word he wasn’t speaking.

He was oblivious to your self-consciousness, as previously stated. Yes, there had to have been a small part of him that was mortified at the way he was acting, but he couldn’t find it in his whole self to mind. It would be redundant to say, once again, how desperate he was for the euphoria you brought him, so it won’t be recorded.

“Rui, are you… good?” You break him out of his mind, making him realize that he hadn’t been listening to your last few sentences. Damnit! How could he be so stupid as to ignore you? His excitement dulls for a moment, only a moment, at the feeling of worthlessness his ignorance has created. He’s terrified to go back to the anhedonia of his day—of his life?—without you. Is that how the rest of his life will be when you’re not around? Is grey what he will see until he dies?

Why would he die? He’s not suffering from anything, his chest just feels so tight recently. He probably pulled something at rehearsal the day before. Yes, that’s it. He recalls pulling something in his chest the day before. The excitement just messed with his memory, that’s all. No need to worry—

He coughs, his body curling in on itself once again, panicking. It was one thing to be alone and choking, to be disgusting in the comfort of his own company, but it’s another to hack up blood in front of you, having you watch as his body wracks itself from the strain. He waves his hands once again, desperate. He is fine... He has a small cold… Yes, he pulled something the day prior… He’s very clumsy….

He didn’t puke this time, he merely coughed up a petal. Ha! How odd it was to do such a thing!

Your horror is a given. It would be needless to say why, but it will be explained anyway (for the sake of clarity).

You had only learned about hanahaki from a recent showing of a musical he’d taken you to a few months ago. You had—admittedly—been slightly skeptical on the idea, thinking it was just another foreign concept for people to amuse themselves, but after a long debate on the topic, you had found out that it was, in fact, real (though uncommon).

It was a great shock to you that someone as agreeable as your best friend would be burdened with an illness of unrequited love. (In a moment of self reflection you would admit to yourself that he would be, in fact, very easy to love. You’d never say those words aloud, though, in fear of him getting the wrong idea.) The thought of your friend suffering from something so agonizing and potentially fatal was enough to make bile rise to your throat, but a new emotion soon followed it; anger. How dare someone not return his feelings? The nerve of this person to not want to spend their every moment with such a wonderful person is absurd! They must be an idiot, you couldn’t imagine being so dense.

He sees the color drain from your face and he’s not so out of his mind as to be ignorant to it. He can only assume you’re going to figure out his secret, who else could it be? Once again his world goes dark and hopeless, the mania he once rode on proceeding to crash and burn before he could appreciate it was even there. Everything has become dissonant, lacking harmony, or substance. He questions what an existence is where you don’t see him. It’s truly better to die than to live that way. After you mock him, he can simply just jump off the school roof. It would be tricky, but-

“Rui…” Your coddling voice rings out, filling his mouth with a sickly-sweet taste. Save him the embarrassment and pity, won’t you? You needn’t concern yourself with trivial matters, go on, now.

“Who is it?”

He freezes. He hadn’t excepted that. Could it be you were playing coy so as to not shoulder the guilt? No, that can’t be it. As unsound as he is, he knows you better than that. You would be true to yourself, he knows that’s the kind of person you are.

He’s furious with himself and you. He can’t believe he would ever think so lowly of you as to believe you’d actually talk him to suicide. What was with him? Hadn’t he had a relationship with you at all? He knows you well—too well—so it’s unthinkable he’d mischaracterize you. But on the other hand, he hardens himself on the fact you don’t know about his feelings. As appalling and depraved as it sounds, he’d never been subtle. Willfully ignorant, yes. Your subconscious must despise him so much as to block out any possible cues to your mind. How humiliating!

A thought races into his head; how is he to answer your question? He simply cannot say that he has feelings for you, he’s better off shooting himself in the foot and trying to run away. He tries to conjure up anybody he could be believably infatuated with, and much to his embarrassment only four people come to mind.

Emu? No, that would never work. She is much too… much. You’d never believe such an idiotic thing.

Tsukasa? Same problem. Claiming to have feelings for him would only stir up unwanted controversy.

Mizuki? Out of the question. You’ve had multiple conversations in which he’s told you how unromantic his love is for them. In hindsight, he should’ve covered his bases more. He’s so stupid.

Nene?

Nene!

It was a perfect crime. She knew about his feelings for you, so even if you did go to her, she’d have the brains to question him privately afterwards. They’re always accused of dating, they’re known for being close, she’s a very likable girl—God, Tsukasa couldn’t think of a better plan himself! Sometimes he could be a very calculated boy!

“Nene…” He rasps out, his head hung low to hide a sick smile. This is it. His hope is gone and he will die; die knowing that he was able to be saved if not for the circumstances. Everyone dies anyway, so why not now? why not yesterday, or the day before, or the year before? What difference is it to him, or to you for that matter!? If he were to drop to his knees and kick the bucket, would that change the course of the future? He’s, of course, not so arrogant to assume such! Such brainless sentiments aren’t reserved for him at the moment. And what is the future? The future has already happened! It’s over! Humans will be gone for good, the earth with explode, everything that will happen has happened. What use is one teenager’s life?

“Nene?” If he hears that name one more time, he may just vomit. He feels guilty to put the blame of his illness onto his bosom friend, but he’s sure she’d understand. Anyone who had any brain would do the same thing he has, so it’s not worth feeling guilty over.

You, on the other hand, are shocked once again. You had never expected it to be Nene. You anticipated someone more distant, far enough out of reach to warrant the one-sidedness. You supposed it wasn’t too far-fetched for him to be in love with Nene, they did spend their whole lives together. Yes, it wasn’t hard to believe when you really thought about it, but now you’re left frustrated at the state of things. Why didn’t Nene return his feelings? You’d thought for sure—

“Did you tell her?”

Great. His time would now be spent more productively if he dug his own grave, or made good of that promise to jump. Is he so inhumane with himself as to keep his this lie going before his death? No, he couldn’t… But what if… Whatever.

“I can’t.” Just shut up and lie in it. Prolonging this is inhumane, even for him.

“Why not?” You’re not helping. Why can’t you have the compassion to leave him be? You’re doing this to mess with him, aren’t you? Do you laugh at the fact he will surely die soon? You’re even worse than him. He can’t believe he loves you.

He loves you enough to die for it, he’d better humble himself.

Another cough.

“Rui! Hey, hey, you don’t need to tell me, it’s okay!” You rub his back, holding him so tenderly he starts to believe he died by some strange twist of fate and ended up in the afterlife. (Even in his suffering, his inner-monologue refused to use the word ‘heaven’. He had read in The Bible that suicide is a sin. He wonders what the perimeters are for an unrequited love gone involuntarily, yet very just, death.)

It pops into his mind that he’s still with you, and it sounds a little contradictory to say, but he’s annoyed. Not at you, no, never at you, but is it too much to ask to die at peace? (Well, as much peace he can have with the circumstances.) Must he be tortured with your face?

He stands up, his coughing seizing for a moment. He thanks whoever’s up there for letting him get through his sentences without choking. He looks down at you, still in your previous position.

“I don’t feel well,” he says curtly. What an idiotic statement! Obviously he doesn’t feel well, he just coughed up a flower. He talks to talk, what a brainless pastime! He should just walk away.

“I could’ve told you that,” you reply. “Do you want me to take you to—“

“I’m fine,” he rejects, walking away.

A worrying exchange…

You decide you need to help your friend. You can’t just watch him die.

That day, Rui walks home with the eloquence of a man on trial, trudging as if his fate had already been decided—it has. What can he do about it? He can’t even begin to imagine what death is. The thought that he will simply cease to exist, that he will just return from whence he came, no consciousness weighing him; it’s terrifying. People say “a fate worse than death” without thinking, but what is worse than death? Torture keeps you sane, mediocrity keeps you comfortable; death ends, that’s it. There’s nothing. Pain can stop, dullness can be invigorated, you cannot bring someone back from the dead! What a moronic fantasy to entertain! He’s going to die! He will die. Death, dying, and all words similar make him want to scream. Mortality is such a cruel idea. He tries to tell himself he shouldn’t worry about it, that it will come either way and should be accepted for a natural part of life, but he can’t stop himself. What is the point of anything if he is meant to die? He can’t control it.

It starts to rain, which is only another thing he has no say over. He grasps for any semblance of choice, of say, but all he finds is a pitiful snail making its way across the pavement.

He stops in horror, examining the sorry thing. They’re both alive, yes, that snail is living its only life, the same as him. He thinks of the amount of people who run their bikes over them without a second thought, he thinks of watching his peers pour salt to amuse themselves for a moment or two. They’ve probably forgotten taking lives. As previously stated, he takes better care to step around them when the air becomes dewy. It wouldn’t feel right to have such disregard for life, especially now.

He starts to think of all the bugs he’s slapped, all the stay cats he’s shooed away, all the rats he’s trapped, and it makes him feel sick. They are all dead now, their one life was ended. He should feel lucky he (at least) had a good run. He got to be a human being, isn’t that something? At least he lived 17 years, instead of a couple weeks. That snail will be dead in a few days if not caught, no doubt. Which is better; to live for as long as your body can, or die for the betterment of another? Isn’t that what his disease is… in a way? With or without meaning to, you hunted and killed him, stripping him of his choice. He is now the person in ethics questions who is tied to the tracks! Ha!

That snail has only moved a couple inches since he’s been watching…

He’s hit with a sudden wave of resentment.

Must be nice, huh? Being able to live so leisurely. The deplorable thing is surely not aware of its own existence. The more he thinks, the worse this resentment becomes. He’s so unlucky to be a human being, everything he’s stated before has been proven false. People are idiotic and dense. How braindead is it to become the only species capable of existential thought? Do we as a society benefit from such? He wouldn’t entertain the idea. Sure, other animals know they have the possibility to die, but they don’t actually grasp what it truly means. The more he thinks, animals cant love too, which is what caused his untimely death to begin with. Ignorance is bliss. Only the dumb are comfortable.

The tip of his fingers vibrate and go numb as his body fills with unbridled fury. How dare this thing taunt him? How dare it spark this conversation? If it could hold a thought in its head, it would no longer be moving; it would scream as he is now. How lucky is it, being able to live life without strain? It could barely be considered living, actually, he’d be surprised if it had a brain at all. What a depraved, useless, insignificant, and unenlightened waste of air.

In a fit of passion, he crushes a shell and the parasite inside. He drags its remains across the pavement.

It was going to die anyway.

[toniko]

Disaster Management Bureau = Lesser of 2 evils ?

thoughts on work themes of gsgw

uhh let’s say up to c194, that’s when I last read

by the way, it’s really funny how the title’s legitimacy is kept even with the change of setting anywho

oh but honestly as workplaces (even beyond what they deal with) both Daydream & Disaster Management Bureau are representative of abusive and high burnout type workplaces

Let’s look past the morality aspects of what both institutions are trying to accomplish for a bit and look at employee human rights

Daydream is one step away from a black company ((it’s a Japanese term) black company = a company abusive to just short of illegal/basically is/sweatshop esque) (No isn’t it???). There’s an ever amount of abusive superiors. Director Ho. Go Youngeun for example, though it was described briefly, had a boss that seemed openly dismissive of her & ditched her and that seems to the standard rather than the sweet Team D Kim Soleum experiences. I don’t think I need to give more examples. Existence of the finishing teams, it’s a real human rights case. Work is obviously not rewarding and overtime is comically bad when you’re stuck in a ghost story for a few days.

However, the notable thing about Daydream is that good performance seriously gets you somewhere in the company & the employee benefits are legitimate. Housing… honestly a neat, company covered, close to work apartment. And since it’s a pharmaceutical company, health is rather well covered. Don’t forget that high base salary, the reputation of working at a famous company… There’s such an extreme amount of things you can buy with points, it’s the ultimate high risk high reward trade off.

Disaster Management Bureau is the perfect place to send upstanding people who want to help and support people so they get overworked and underpaid. It’s amazing that Kim Soleum who had enough to spend hundreds of millions of won on the alien store. And if I am to recall, Disaster Management Bureau work is so, so frequent. Especially since there’s a reduced number of teams at this point (reason = death!) and you can imagine why Soleum ran into Agent Bronze so often. Forgive me for doing 0 citation ever on these, I type these on a phone to unload fandom thoughts & not to write academic essays, if I’m wrong about how much he works please 🙏 comment or anything else for that matter.

And absolutely no disrespect, but Disaster Management Bureau ghost stories are real spontaneous. There’s a reason why the stories aren’t ranked within the Disaster Management logs. They just respond to most calls and there’s (checks scribbles on hand) three whole rescue teams right now? Is that right? Kim Soleum joined a currently 2 person team? You’re sending a newbie to a place where agents went missing already? Let’s hire more people and have more professional guides… If Daydream wasn’t as deeply corrupt as it is and swapped to saving civilians while collecting the solution, then I would believe them to be ridiculously successful in doing so. (Well that’s just a what-if, I don’t think it’s actually feasible to happen at all). Anyway, it’s difficult. When I see the sullen faces of the agents who lost their coworkers and work such long hours at crazy call requests earning a meager salary… yes this is the principle of society isn’t it? A good person who wants to work at a public institution doing good deeds, help & save people have less personal benefits than working at a private company with scummy ethics!

Doesn’t the government prey on the goodwill of people to solve ghost stories and operate using a trolley problem? The general public is kept safe one step at a time at the sacrifice of the wellbeing & lives of a couple of good people. So while it’s inherently socially upright to work for the Disaster Management Bureau, it’s also a lifetime employment to sacrifice for the people.

It all sucks really.

[goldcleaver]

I'm gonna put my two thirds of a classics degree to work here

When I said Phaidei can be seen as an allegory for Odysseus and Penelope, I meant it

Penelope encounters the returned Odysseus posing as a beggar. From a mural in the Macellum of Pompeii

Spoiler warnings: 3.0, 3.1, 3.2, as well as leaks towards the end.

TL;DR: Mydei is Penelope, Phainon is Odysseus.

Mydei and Penelope

Now, I know it may seem tempting to say that Mydei, being the big, strong, burly man that he is, is a parallel to Odysseus, but he’s actually Penelope! This whole fever dream of a "theory" actually stems from the parallels between Mydei and Penelope, specifically. Phainon was a secondary thought lmao.

Point 1) The theme of buying time

It cannot be understated just how much of Mydei’s core themes center around buying time, not just for others, but also for himself. 

On multiple occasions, he goes to some pretty extreme lengths to do so, namely in 3.0 when he offers up his own immortal body as a means of keeping Nikador occupied in Castrum Kremnos. In that moment, he completely puts his own safety on the back burner – the team needs to hold Nikador off long enough to render them immortal once more, and Mydei has the solution, no matter the personal cost of dying a couple of times. Later, in 3.1, he puts his own personal feelings aside to shoulder the divinity of Strife, despite the fact that he was hesitant to do so in 3.0, simply because it would be for the best. Then, at the end of 3.1, he completely disregards his own wants and fears, and takes the fight to the Black Tide on his own because he is the only one capable of doing so. By sacrificing himself in this manner, he can buy his fellow Chrysos Heirs enough time to usher in the new dawn, and the miracle of Genesis.

But Mydei doesn’t just buy time for others, he also does so for himself. Throughout 3.0 and 3.1, his story leads up to one massive decision: what to do about the Kremnoans. He is torn between claiming the crown – his birthright – and leading his people back to Castrum Kremnos, or leaving them in Okhema. 

However, to the Kremnoans, Nikador is synonymous with kingship, judging by Krateros’ reaction to Mydei surrendering the Coreflame to Phainon. In Krateros’ eyes, Mydei giving up Nikador’s divine power is the same thing as him “giving up the throne of Kremnos and forsaking his people”. 

As previously stated, Mydei is hesitant to claim Nikador’s coreflame for fear of ending up like his corrupt forebears and leading his people down the wrong path, so obviously he wants to put off that decision for as long as possible. First, he enters a (frankly, pointless) competition with Phainon just to decide who gets to deliver the final blow to Nikador, and gives up his win ridiculously easily if Phainon loses. That way, they can ignore the decision they have to make for a while longer. Then, when Nikador is dead, he is quick to surrender the Coreflame to Phainon, and promptly shuts down Phainon’s attempt to discuss the subject any further. So, by sending Phainon to the trial of divinity, Mydei can avoid making his own decision regarding the fate of the Kremnoans, if we take Krateros’ words about kingship and Nikador’s powers into consideration. Effectively, Mydei makes sure the decision is out of his hands – he didn’t technically reject the Coreflame, after all. 

So how does all of this connect to Penelope, exactly? 

Well, Penelope’s themes also center around buying time – for herself, and for Odysseus. She also has a big decision to make: who should succeed Odysseus as the king of Ithaca, and just like Mydei, she wants to put it off for as long as possible. Naturally, she doesn’t want to choose, and comes up with increasingly desperate ideas to keep the suitors at bay. In the end, she does succeed; she buys Odysseus enough time to return home, and as such she never has to choose a new suitor. Unlike Mydei.

You see, Mydei actually fails in avoiding his decision. In the end, he is forced to take on the Coreflame when Phainon fails the trial. As a result, Mydei has to make a decision regarding his people and his potential kingship. In this sense, Krateros and the rest of the Kremnoans are the suitors, encouraging Mydei (Penelope) to make a choice.

If we view Mydei’s actions through this Penelope-esque lens, we can draw some pretty convincing parallels!

Point 2) The challenge

At the climax of Penelope’s story, right before her reunion with Odysseus, she makes a last-ditch attempt to hold off the suitors by presenting them with a seemingly impossible challenge. She sets up twelve axes and demands that the suitors shoot through them flawlessly using Odysseus’ old bow. What she doesn’t tell the suitors is this: the bow is nigh impossible to string. Then, as a sort of fail safe, she sits down behind the axes. That way, if a suitor succeeds, she is immediately killed and doesn’t have to marry them.

While this is more far-fetched than point 1, a connection to Mydei’s actions can still be made, in the sense that he, too, has made arrangements for the worst case scenario. In case he is corrupted by the Black Tide, and thus cannot buy the Chrysos Heirs enough time to bring about the miracle (i.e buy Odysseus enough time to return to Ithaca), Mydei has arranged a fail safe for himself by telling Phainon about his weak spot. Phainon is the only one who knows about it, and as such, he is the only one who can shoot through the twelve axes with Odysseus’ bow. The parallels may not be perfect, but the narrative is very similar.

Point 3) Sparta/Castrum Kremnos

My last point is their origins. Penelope is Spartan royalty, though she was never its ruler. It’s no secret that Castrum Kremnos is vaguely based on ancient Sparta, and Mydei is the prince-turned-king of Castrum Kremnos. It’s a pretty obvious connection, but I’ve chosen to highlight it, nonetheless.

Phainon and Odysseus 

I'll admit that Phainon's connection to Odysseus is vaguer than Mydei and Penelope’s, but I can totally see it. 

Point 1) The one time is being bought for

Penelope buys Odysseus time to return to Ithaca, Mydei buys Phainon and the other Chrysos Heirs time to a) render Nikador mortal, and b) bring about the miracle of Genesis. Now, post-3.2, we know that Phainon is meant to take over the authority of Kephale. If the plan proceeds smoothly, he will be the last one left alive to reforge the new world with his, in Anaxa’s words, “complete, intact memories”. While we cannot be certain that Mydei knows this, it can still be argued that Phainon himself is the one Mydei is buying time for.

Point 2) Nobody

Odysseus initially evades Polyphemus by calling himself “Nobody”. Phainon is called the “Nameless Hero��, and we have no idea what his real name is. Just like Odysseus, he has crafted a persona for himself.

Point 3) The journey to Ithaca

Phainon going on the Flamechase Journey is his version of Odysseus' journey of going to war and then trying to make it back to Ithaca. They're both put through the wringer a million times over on their journey, and express desires to go back home. In the end, they are both crumbling under the weight of their past actions and losses, and become increasingly more brutal because of it, if Phainon’s behaviour towards Oronyx in 3.0 was anything to go off of.

Also, LEAK WARNING:

.

.

.

Going off leaks, we know that Phainon is both the Flame Reaver, and the final boss for Amphoreus. For whatever reason, we can guess that he lost his humanity somewhere along the line, and, if you can forgive the EPIC reference, became the monster. In the Odyssey, Odysseus ends his journey by slaughtering the suitors vying for Penelope’s hand, showcasing his potential for great violence, much like Phainon. 

TL;DR: Mydei is Penelope, Phainon is Odysseus.

Now, this was obviously mostly for shits and giggles, but the parallels are pretty convincing, ngl.

Bonus: Phaidei = Patrochilles

Now, additionally: they can ALSO be seen as an allegory for Achilles and Patroclus, especially since the game has already drawn parallels between the Iliad and the Amphoreus story.

The game is obviously hinting towards Mydei being Achilles considering his whole weak spot-thing. Naturally, that makes Phainon Patroclus. If we regard Mydei as the “true” heir to Nikador’s divinity, Then Phainon was technically taking Mydei's place in the trial. Ultimately, he fails to pass, which is a nice parallel to how Patroclus dons Achilles' armour to lead the Myrmidons, and dies against Hector, who Achilles later slays in a fit of rage. In this case, Hector is Nikador, who first dies by the team’s hands during the fight, and then later dies by Mydei’s own hand in his trial.

[dinoandguitar]

Between Rounds & Rhythms

Idol!Dino x afab!medicalstudent (Hana Chae)

Part 3 Part 5

Masterlist

Part 4 : Normal’s kind of nice actually

Later that night, Hana stared at her phone long after she got home. Her shift was finally over, her body aching and her eyes heavy with sleep. Her hair still smelled faintly of antiseptic, and there was a coffee stain on her scrubs she hadn’t even noticed until she reached her apartment,but none of that mattered right now.

Not when her brain kept replaying the last hour like a highlight reel.

Lee Chan’s flushed face. His awkward, stumbling voice. That ridiculous,but oddly endearing,"medical emergency" excuse.

Her lips curled into a tired smile as she flopped onto her bed, hugging her pillow close. He was… different. Not in the usual "idol way" one would expect. But in how he looked at his friends with quiet fondness. In how he spoke with genuine warmth. In how he hadn’t complained once, even when he clearly needed rest. Just as she let out a soft sigh, a ding interrupted the silence.

[Unknown Number]

It’s Chan. Just making sure you didn’t give me a fake number.

Also, thanks again… for today.

She giggled, already typing back:

Would’ve been bad PR for the hospital.

You’re welcome :)

Almost immediately:

Lee Chan

Sooo… dinner sometime? You know... For saving my life.

Hana

...Is this your way of saying you’ll show up to the hospital again if I say no?

Lee Chan

I mean… not on purpose.

Maybe. (Joking) (Please say yes :,)

She rolled her eyes, smile growing.

Hana

Okay then.. one dinner. If you promise not to collapse again.

Chan

Yay! Deal.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Within the next few days, texting Lee Chan quickly became part of Hana’s routine.

It started innocently enough- quick exchanges about his recovery, a few sarcastic comments about hospital food, an occasional meme or two. But soon, their chats evolved into something warmer. He texted her good morning before call time. She sent “don’t overdo it” reminders between shifts. They talked about their favorite late-night snacks, shows they never had time to finish, random memories from childhood, future dreams they were too tired to chase just yet. It was… effortless.

And the rest of the members of seventeen?

Oh, they noticed.

One afternoon, the group was sprawled across their practice room in various states of exhaustion after choreography drills. Dino sat tucked into a corner, back against the mirror, grinning softly as he stared at his phone.

“Okay, what’s with the look?” Seungkwan demanded, squinting at him.

"What look?” Chan asked, feigning innocence.

“The dumb, happy, flushed face one,” Mingyu added. “Like a rom-com lead who just got a text from his crush.”

Chan fumbled to lock his screen, ears already turning red. “I’m just replying to someone.”

“Someone?” Soonyoung’s eyes lit up. “Is it her? The doctor? The pretty one with the no-nonsense vibe who apparently you had met earlier?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Chan mumbled, though the way he sunk deeper into his hoodie betrayed him.

“Dude, you’ve been smiling at your phone like it sent you a love letter,” Vernon said from the couch.

Jun perked up. “Did it?”

DK gasped dramatically. “Wait, wait, wait—IS OUR MAKNE DATING A DOCTOR???”

“No!” Chan groaned. “We’re just friends... i think.. we're just texting.”

Joshua, who’d been quietly observing, finally smirked. “Mmm. Texting. Like... good morning texts? Or how-was-your-shift-you-must-be-tired kind of texts?”

Chan gave up arguing and buried his face in his arms.

“That’s a yes,” Jeonghan sang.

“Do we get to meet her?” Minghao asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Or are you going to keep this secret until the wedding?”

“There’s no wedding!” Chan cried.

“Oh my God,” Seungkwan gasped. “I’ll bring the flowers. Mingyu can cry at the altar.”

“Hey! I will,” Mingyu said proudly.

Chan groaned louder. “I hate all of you.”

Soonyoung patted his shoulder sympathetically. “That’s fine. You can hate us. Just make sure you invite us to the dinner.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After days of back-and-forth schedules, last-minute reshoots, and emergency rounds, they finally managed to meet.

The place wasn’t fancy-just a cozy, tucked-away Korean diner near a quiet street. They arrived separately, both in caps and masks, slipping into a booth in the far corner where no one paid them much attention.

They laughed over dumplings and shared food, the conversation flowing like they’d done this a hundred times before. Hana told him about the time she mistook a department head for a new intern and ended up with extra night shifts for a week. Chan admitted he used to cry before performing back when he was a trainee, anxiety gnawing at his chest.

“You?” Hana blinked. “You perform like you were born on stage.”

“I wasn’t,” he said with a sheepish smile. “I had to fight for that confidence.”

There was a quiet moment, just the two of them, the warmth between them tangible. As they stepped outside, the air crisp and cool, Hana tucked her hands into her coat.

“Are you sure this isn’t bothering you?” she asked, glancing sideways. “The whole… public thing. You being seen with someone like me.”

“Someone like you?” Chan echoed.

“I mean… not an idol. Not famous. Just… me... Normal.”

He looked at her then, really looked. “Normal's kind of nice, actually.”

Hana played it cool after hearing that. As if she didn’t just feel her heart do a dance.. You could say the same to Dino as well

And that night, after she texted him to say she got home safely, he replied—

Lee Chan

Thanks for tonight.

I haven’t felt this... calm in a long time.

Hana

Me too.

Get some rest, okay?

Lee Chan

Only if you promise to sleep and not work till 3 a.m.

Hana

No promises :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Part 5

A/N : So sorry for the long wait! Hope ya'll like it :)

Please feel free to send in requests. Also lmk if you want to be added to the Taglist.

Taglist : @neivivenaj

[johanna-swann]

I still can´t get over that fact that Tim ripped off a fringe fandom theory and made Abby and Tommy canon without it even having any impact on the story. Like, dude you chose to go with it so the least you could do is make it matter. Have Buck question whether he was always just a rebound for Abby. Bribe Connie Britton back for a cameo and make it funny when all three run into each other. Just do something with it! Everything that happend in 8x6 could have happend if Tommy was engaged to any random woman

When I think about what purpose this detail served it really makes little sense that they brought Abby up this way at this time.

For Buck the Abby thing was supposed to first make him doubt his trust in Tommy and then double down on wanting this relationship when he realises it doesn't really change anything and he is serious about Tommy.

For Tommy it's supposed to give him a little whiplash, catch him off guard, so he gets overwhelmed and ends the relationship.

They did not need Abby for this though. She's not relevant in the break-up itself, she's just the catalyst that makes Buck think about the relationship more. That could've easily been achieved by, Idk, one of their friends mentioning the pre-Gerrard quitting version of Tommy (Tommy 1.0 if you will).

Josh could've still done his "things were different then, some of us had to hide to be safe" speech, Chim could've thrown a line in about it taking a while, but growing fond of Tommy eventually. (This might've also finally satisfyed people who complain that Tommy being a dick to Chimney was never addressed.)

As far as I can tell the Abby thing was only done because Tim Minear saw us joking about it and thought "you know what would be funny?" (He can't even remember how long the main characters have worked at the 118, there's no way he just remembered a season 1 character's never shown boyfriend's name that was mentioned twice maybe.)

This could've been incredibly funny if they had got Connie Britton to come back for a cameo where all three of them run into each other and who knows, they might still do that, but it won't land as a ridiculous surprise twist anymore because we know now.

So yeah. The way they did it was really bad. It was part of the awful anniversary dinner scene, then it wasn't really important anymore, it wasn't funny, they didn't try to explain how it fit into the timeline with Tommy also being all "being single is easier" around the same time he was supposedly engaged, the 118 somehow didn't recognise Abby (if she was Tommy's beard wouldn't he have at least talked about his fiancée the dispatcher at work?) and they kinda missed their chance at actually making a fun whacky story line out of this.

[draurer]

When did the Weasleys find out about Oliver and Percy's relationship? They found out on May 2, 1998.

May 2, 1998.

I take the view that Percy and Oliver got together during the war. Look: they were friends at school for seven years and lived together, it couldn't just go away just because they graduated.

Yes, Percy was a jerk and acted like a jerk in 1995, but people can act like jerks. And people can also change. And people may also need other people. Friendship is something that goes through all your stages with you: when you're an idiot, when you're an emo, when you cut off ridiculous bangs or try to pretend to be special.

There was something deeper than friendship between Oliver and Percy. Oliver was the last beacon of acceptance for Percy, because in those years Percy quarreled with his family and was actually left alone. What did he have? Working in the ministry with idiots and pure-blooded aristocrats? Yeah, cool. Yes, it was his own fault, but that didn't make his loneliness any easier.

But he had Oliver. A lot could have happened in three years (I won't tell you exactly what, because it will take several hours). Let's just accept the fact that three years with the same person changes both of you and your relationship.

And just imagine: you and your loved one live in wartime. And on the day when you're literally fighting to the death and people are dying around you, you split up.

And what do you hear when the battle stops so that you can collect the dead bodies? You hear a rumor that someone from your loved one's family is dead. AND YOU DON'T KNOW WHO EXACTLY.

Just imagine how panicked Oliver is. He's shaking, he can't find Percy, he's injured himself, there's a smell of blood and smoke, there are a lot of wounded people around. His first and closest friend may be dead, his beloved man may be dead.

When Oliver finds Percy, Percy will naturally cry over Fred's body. Like his family. It's an unbearable loss for them, but all that matters to Oliver is that his Weasley is alive. For Percy, who hasn't spoken to his family in three years, but has been with Oliver all the time, he will be a support and a shoulder for Percy to cry on. It's sad, but over time, Oliver has become closer to him than his own family. Sometimes it happens that way.

In the affect, you can forget that you need to control your intimacy and hide the relationship. What the hell difference does it make if you might not make it to midnight?

Of course Oliver and Percy will hold on to each other, stand very close and not let go of each other's arms.

Of course, one of the Weasleys will see. But they're not up to it right now.

I know they'll discuss it much later. Maybe in a few months.

But they found out about it on May 2, 1998.

[missmargomuse616]

Margo was still a bit skeptical but as she heard the soft way he spoke and the look on his face told her that it wasn't entirely a lie. She just wanted to make sure he was okay and that he didn't have another episode. Didn't no rather all the talk of his family finally gotten to him or something really dramatic most have went down two years ago. Wait did he say two years ago? Her mind reeling back at what happened in that time frame.

" that must've been very difficult time for you. Just relax for a few minutes. If there is anything you need we could stop somewhere and get you some water or anything" She reassured him as she gently lays her hand on his arm. Margo knew what a panic attack was so it was different for everyone and while it seem unlikely that was the case with Luke it was a mess of a situation. She felt bad for him and was glad to be there and make sure he was alright.

" you know at first I thought you maybe had some weird allergic reaction to that glowing blue cube. I know it's ridiculous. It's probably a good thing I didn't get it." She admitted with a slight light tone in her voice wanted to lighten the mood and can't from overthinking.

" I'm curious of actually how and why these triggers of yours started in the first place. I totally understand if you don't want to explain. As long as your feeling okay that's what matters." Margo say honestly although there was another part of her that wanted to know.

Margo was all set to go along with luke. Planning a prank that she hoped would pull through. Sure it may have been silly but it was one of those times when she gets to do something that's a little mischievous and fun. Plus it was nice to hang out with him and for him to meet her family. What she didn't expect was to see what happened in front of her.

She quickly changed her mind about buying the item. Looking even closer one last time it read ' electric blue light bulb" basically nothing to make a fuss about. It was a bit odd as soon as he seen the item it was like he was afraid of it, liking being physically near it might hurt him.

While she slowly helped walking him out of the shop her features were to of concern at his state. Was he having a panic attack? He did so it was just a migraine so that could be the reason. The weather was near perfect outside with a slight breeze. She moved a bit closer but still giving her space to calm down. " are you sure you're okay? You don't need any aspirin or anything to take for your migraine?" She ask giving him a look that said she only half believed him.

" what do you mean by that? Do you normally have panic attacks?" Margo asked him calmly. standing beside him and her features softens. She needed him to be honest with her if things get bad like this again. Margo couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to what he wasn't saying.

[wigglebox]

Newsflash: They sound ridiculous either way

[tackykachowch]

How it feels to not like timebomb after s2

[lemotmo]

Ryan gave same answer to buddie question he is been giving from the moment bi buck was canon. He didn’t say in same words like Eddie is straight and buck Eddie are brothers but he did say the same in so many words like friendship between straight and queer characters is an important storyline and that’s priority than anything else

I always try to ignore interviews especially Ryan’s answers to buddie questions as what they think is not important and what the show is trying to show is important. But at this point I am not really sure if I should trust the show as Ryan is the one playing Eddie and his answer at this point of time is same and not even vague like let’s see where the script goes or I am ok with what ever the story takes. Just don’t know what to expect at this point

To be clear I am not saying Ryan is homophonic or anything, he seems like a kind person who treats everyone equally and with respect. But with all his answers in interviews, I get a feeling like he is not so much comfortable with playing a gay character (for what ever reason I don’t know and I don’t question or judge people choices as it doesn’t harm any real people).

If Eddie is still straight by 8.14 or 15, I don’t have much hope

Nonny, all do respect, but I have to ask this:

Why did you bring this to my blog? You must have seen my enthusiasm about Ryan's latest interview and how it has only strenghtened my conviction that Buddie is going canon. So why would you post this here when you already know what I'm going to tell you?

I also don't understand your reaction here. I've been in this fandom for years now and I've never been more confident that it's going canon than now. Before season 7 I never even thought Buddie would get a fighting chance.

What did you expect Ryan to say in this interview? 8b hasn't aired yet, so he can't disclose any of the upcoming storylines. He was always going to rehash some of his earlier answers from previous interviews, because what else could he possibly answer?

The inevitable Buddie question came and -once again- he had to find a way to answer it without spoiling anything. What could he possibly have said? He can't just come out and say that Buddie is going canon at this point, because it hasn't happened yet.

So he said the only thing he could say, the message that no matter who you are and who you love in life, it's important to support each other. Which is a beautiful message in itself.

He isn't saying anything else than Oliver did in his pre-biBuck days. It's the same 'trying to talk about it, but not allowed to say anything' kind of thing. 🤷‍♀️

And what about the question where Ryan was asked what advice he would give Eddie? His answer was so telling. It hinted at Eddie not being straight in such a profound way. That was basically the only thing he could say when it comes to Eddie's sexuality storyline.

The man's hands were and are tied. They have been for a long time. And no, he isn't afraid to play a gay man. How do I know this? Because he has actually played a gay man before in another project. He also talked about, on multiple times, the fact that he would be all for Buddie if the story would go there. Those are not the words of a man who doesn't want to play a gay man.

If he really wouldn't want to play a gay man, he would just state it out loud. He would say something like 'Yeah, the Buddie thing is a really fun thing. Oliver and me joke about it, but it isn't going to happen. Eddie is very straight and he will never be interested in Buck like that.' BAM! Just like that he would make it clear to everyone that he isn't willing to play that part and it isn't happening.

Now, if you want an example of an interview by someone who really doesn't want to play a gay character, but had no other choice because it was the only job he could get? Look no further and Google one of Lou Fjr's unhinged interviews where he talks about how he doesn't think it's always appropriate for two characters to make out on screen, but that rule only seems to apply to male/male relationships. He never seemed to have any issues with making out with women on screen before. 🙄

But anyway, let's not get distracted here by talking about that man and let's get back onto the subject of Ryan's interview.

I know that I probably won't be able to change your mind on this Nonny and I'm not even going to attempt it, because in all honesty? I'm tired of all the nay-saying and the inevitable spiral of fear that happens every single time when something happens in this fandom.

I don't know what you want? I've been in so many fandoms, shipping ships that NEVER became canon even though they should have. There was always subtext of course, but that's where it ended. The rest of the story we (the fandom) had to build up from scratch.

For Buddie though--

This isn't just about subtext anymore Nonny. This is fullblown TEXT! It's all there in the show, in the PR, in the interviews, in social media, in Family Fued and Jeopardy! What more could you possibly want?

If you don't believe it by now? There is nothing I can say or do to convince you, so you will just have to wait and see as the episodes air.

Tell you what though--

I predict that we will find out about Eddie's sexuality sometime before or at the very last in episode 8x15. Bold statement, I know. But I feel very confident about this. Oh and Buck? I'm willing to bet that all of his spiraling will finally lead to him realising he is in love with Eddie and this will be shown to us even sooner than Eddie's coming out.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Now excuse me while I go bask in the glory of the impending promise that is Buddie canon. 😏