#what possible the future do I have anymore
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that-one-anxious-mango · 2 days ago
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sweet negotiations
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summary: terry finds himself in a series of negotiations and comforts with his wife after a key asset in their home is compromised.
pairing: terry richmond x black reader (Dallas)
content: fluff, allusions to nsfw acts, some mild crying (hormones)
a/n: hello there and welcome! after looking for some more fluffy terry fics and almost crashing out when I couldn't find them, I decided to just start writing some that will all take place in the same universe titled ' thunder and lightning', which will follow you, terry, and the antics of domestic and kinky married life. this is the first of many to come. so enjoy, like, comment, and reblog :)
" I said no." Terry, his voice soft and tired, sounded off the freshly painted sage green walls of nursery, “ Now, stop pouting and hand me the second screwdriver on the chair, please.” 
But instead of moving to fulfil his request, you stay planted in your spot by the door, still pouting, possibly harder now as you looked down to inform your companion of the mistreatment.
“ You hear that, muffin? You hear how Daddy is being mean to us.” You playfully patted at your swollen stomach, while being sure to throw your husband an extra pouty expression—bottom lip puckered and all. “ Why won’t he be nice and feed us, huh?”
In this moment of time you were about five months pregnant with yours and Terry's third child. And while he absolutely adored seeing you like this, barefoot, in one of his old band shirts and low shorts, with a scarf on your head, and thick bifocals sitting neatly at the bridge of your nose as carried his baby. He could do without the sullen expression on your face as an accessory.
“ Baby, ain’t nobody being mean to you by telling you that you can’t have a half a pint of ice cream for breakfast.” Terry's eyes glance at you, before turning his attention back to the half done wooden crib he was working on. “ Now, if you want me to make you some eggs, toast, or oatmeal. I will. But you ain’t having that this early in the morning.” 
“ If at all today. Need to watch what you’re eating more carefully, Mama.” He reminded you. “ Remember what Dr. Kaltura said about watching excess sugar and salt intake. This is serious.”
Quickly the words of your OB flashed through your brain after it had been found that your blood sugar had been a tad higher than she’d liked, a fate that had carried on from your previous pregnancy with your twins into this one.
And of course the minute your husband had caught wind of this, he had come out of retirement from the sugar task force as he now micromanaged and policed every and all things you consumed for the foreseeable future.
“ But Terryyyy.” You whined, “ That’s what both of us want, Poppa.”
Still despite your efforts, he wouldn’t budge.
“No. She doesn’t want that. You do’.” He pointed out, getting up to grab his needed tool,“ Besides, there isn’t anymore anyway.”
“ Yes, he absolutely does. “ You slyly corrected your husband’s wishful thinking, “ And what do you mean there isn’t anymore? Did you throw out my ice cream, Richmond?! Cause I would absolutely hope that’s not what you’re insinuating.”
He sighed, noting the way your eyes turned wild at the thought of your husband touching your beloved sweet treat.
He knew better.
Cause that would be too far and he knew it.
“ No, ma’am.” He simply said, moving back to his work, “ Not this Richmond.” 
“ However, our dear Teensy Richmond may have eaten the rest of it last night after dinner for dessert when you went upstairs to take your bath.” He referred to one your soundly sleeping six year old daughters just down the hall. 
Immediately a frown found a home on your face as you said, “ Wha—I thought I left out pieces of the pecan pie for ya’ll to have. Why were there cute tiny little grubby hands on my ice cream, Poppa?!!”
You huffed, recalling how you had distinctively cut and plated three different pieces of a pecan pie, one large and two small, for your little family to consume after a delicious dinner of lamb chops and smothered potatoes with smoked asparagus.
“ You did.” He confirmed your thoughts , “ But our baby requested to have her pie…a la mode. Which meant a scoop of some of your rocky road was needed as that was the only ice cream left in the freezer.”
“ And as you know, our Tiny Richmond isn’t too fond of rocky road. So she had hers plain jane with glass of milk.” He furthered his explanation.
And although you wanted to be mad at your baby’s little sweet tooth, you couldn’t be, because she got it honest. Still you couldn’t shake off this strange and sudden feeling of…well sadness…that coursed through your body at the thought of the empty ice cream container sitting downstairs in the garbage.
“ Yeah, but if you only gave Teensy a scoop of it. And Tiny didn’t have any, there should be some left.” You tried rationalizing in the same manner of if Johnny had two apples…
Until it came to you, “ Unless…”  
You looked to him and as if he could really read your thoughts, he held a sheepish expression on his face, as he knew what was next to come, “Terrance seriously?!” You hadn’t meant to, but you stamped your feet lightly against the shiny hardwood floor. “ I can’t believe your big eared ass ate my ice cream.”
And just like that your brief moment of sadness has morphed into hormone filled rage.
To which your husband found oddly adorable doing his best to keep a smile off his face, remorse riddled in his tone when he said, “ I’m sorry, Precious. She didn’t wanna eat alone. And since Tiny wasn’t going to have any, I may have had a scoop…or two myself to help finish it off. But it’s okay. We can get more at the store later.” He reasoned, screwing in nut B to pole B. 
By now he was expecting his thunderous woman of a wife to do what she does best, which is make noise about the fact that the rest of her brood ate the ‘ one damn thing the baby allows her to keep down’, but instead he was surprised to look over and see you standing there silent—with tears collecting just at the edge of your waterline. Frown deep. Shoulders slumped.
“ Baby….” He called out in a knowing tone, looking at the way your mouth had slightly turned down and your arms had wrapped around your body, “ C’mon now, Precious. It’s alright. ”
But almost as if it was the release words for your tears, you quickly found your fingertips becoming increasingly wet from wiping the streams away from your cheeks as you began to head toward the door. Slightly embarrassed at your lactose driven waterworks.
Getting up with a sigh, he wasted no time making his way over to you, big hands coming to cup your waist and guide you over to the creme rocking chair, moving all the tools on it to the floor.
It didn’t take long for him to sit and guide you on his lap, an arm wrapped tight around your waist while a calloused hand came to rub against the damp soft apple of your cheek. 
“ C’mere, pretty baby.”  He pecked your lips, tasting the salt of your tears, “ You know I don’t like it when my woman is unhappy. Especially when you’re crying.” 
“ I just can’t help it.” You mutter, partially frustrated with your inability to get a hard grasp on your emotions. “ I just really wanted it. And I mean I know it’s not that serious enough for me to be crying over. And it may seem dramatic but- ” 
“ But it made you upset and that’s okay. You don’t have to explain or try and justify you wanting to cry to me, Baby. It’s fine.” He affirmed, a hand coming to rub at your belly, “ I know this one has those emotions a tad high, and I’m sure Teensy and I blowing up your ice cream stash ain’t helping.” 
A smile fainting at your lips, at the thought of your husband and daughters sitting at the dining room table, talking and laughing over their late night dessert. 
“ So once the twins wake up and we have breakfast we can all take a family trip to the store and grab some more, alright?” He said. 
“ Mmm. And some more Oreos? And Miss Vickie’s Jalapeño?” You rubbed your eyes before looking at him intently, a smirk playing on his face, “ Ya’ know for the pain and suffering caused.” 
“ Hmm. I see.” A hand traveling to your thigh, “ Well for your pain and suffering I am willing to offer you a pint…not a a half baby…but a full pint of rocky road, with a bag of the chips.”
“ Mmm. But what about my Oreos.” You mused. 
He shook his head, “ Nope. Not on the table, beloved. Too much sugar.”
“ Mmm. I dunno. Doesn’t sound fair. I mean I already was owed the ice cream. And while the chips are a good gesture of faith. I feel I deserve more for this indiscretion.” 
He was silent, still smiling at the determination in your filled out cheeks when he said, “  Fine. Counter offer. Pint of the rocky road, bag of chips, and I’ll throw in a bubble bath and personal back massage from yours truly after dinner.” Your breath hitched, feeling a hand slip underneath your bottom to palm the bit of exposed skin you had peeking from under your night shorts. 
“ Just for the record. What kind of massage would this be? ” You coyly inquired, knowing full well what kind he meant.
He moved his mouth to your ear, “ One with a guaranteed happy ending. For us both it seems.”
And how could you deny that? 
“ Fine. I accept your counter offer with the added addition that oil will be used for my massage.”
“ Of course m’am. No other way I’d do it.” He assured, rubbing circles in your thighs. 
“ Good.” You said.
“ Great.” He one upped, “ Now, how should we close this deal? I say with a kiss.”
“ Mmm. “ You hummed, “ I dunno. I think I may need more than a kiss to seal it. And I also think we may need to try out and see how sturdy this chair is. Ya’ know for safety reasons.” 
“ And do you suggest we do that?” His voice low.
“ I dunno.” Your lips find his cheek then his ear, “ We’re already seeing how much weight it can hold, but I wonder how much…rocking or bouncing it can take.”
“ Right, safety reasons.” He mumbled across the skin of your neck, “ Well if that’s the case then—” 
“ Poppa? Mommy? ” The little voice called out from the hallway.
“ WHERE ARE YOU?!” Another yelled, ceasing both yours and Terry’s movements completely , and instead invoked laughter amongst the two of you as he helped you climb off of him and shuffle to the door to collect your late night little ice cream bandit and morning hallway screamer.
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spiderb00 · 1 day ago
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What's Yn and Eve's relationship like? Do they lowkey fight for Yoonchae's attention, do they argue, or is Eve not even bothered by yn? 😹 and what's Sophia like with them?
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Oh anon, Yn is in a competition all by herself. I swear, Evie doesn't even wiggle a muscle to fend off Yn.
Actually, she finds it very funny how Yn acts, but at some points she gets annoyed because she just wants to have time with her girlfriend.
But all of this is quickly turned into provocations.
Evie had probably killed Yn from the heart.
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Relaxing in Yoonchae's room, Evie is lying on the bed, her face tucked into a book she had taken from her backpack, which was now at the foot of her girlfriend's bed. Yoonchae, who had her head lying on Jane's lap, began to miss her girlfriend's attention.
"Evie..." Yoonchae called, making the cat-eyed girl let out a small "hm" without taking her eyes off the book.
With a sigh, Yoonchae lifted her head from Evie's lap, the maknae's eyes scanning the profile of her girlfriend's face, sighing and trying again to get her attention.
"Jagiya..." With her ears perking up and her cheeks flushing as she heard the nickname coming out of Yoonchae's mouth, Evie put the book down, finally looking at the girl next to her.
"Yes, Chae..." Evie said, the girl's gaze softening as she saw how Yoonchae was looking at her.
"How long do we have until your training starts?" Yoonchae asked, moving closer to the girl Jane, making her blush furiously.
"Uhm, I... I think..." The girl tried to speak, becoming slightly disturbed by her girlfriend's beauty. "Thirty minutes."
Finally managing to complete a sentence, Eve saw Yoonchae agree, getting even closer, their noses almost touching, only for the maknae to whisper.
"Can we go buy ice cream?"
"Whatever you want, Chae." Eve said, seeing her girlfriend smile and get even closer.
It would have been perfect, if a thunderous knock on the door had not interrupted them.
"Hey, I said keep the door open!" Yn entered the room, causing Yoonchae to jump away from Evie, and causing the girl Jane to look at her with an indecipherable expression.
"It was open." Eve said.
"No, it wasn't." Yn replied.
"It had three centimeters of space between the door and the hinge, so yes it was open."
"What?"
"You know, you should have specified." Evie said finally, a teasing smile on the girl's lips, while Yoonchae was just standing there, watching it all like a tennis match.
"Yn, leave them alone." Sophia said, appearing in the doorway and grabbing Yn's shoulders.
"I'm leaving them alone, they were very peaceful when I arrived!" Yn replied, making the woman and the two girls present roll their eyes.
"All right, we're going guys." Yoonchae said, pulling Evie by the wrist and making the girl get up from the bed.
"Going? Going where?" Yn asked, the tone of concern flooding her voice.
"Hey, relax. You have to be more chill with it, Yn." Sophia said, pulling her girlfriend down the hall to give the two younger girls some privacy.
"Be more chill? They were about to kiss when I walked in!"
"Look, I know you're worried about Yoonchae, but you have to make them a little more comfortable, Yoonchae won't trust you anymore if you keep choking her." Sophia said, finally putting some sense into Yn's head.
"I know, but they're so young." lowering her head, Yn reflected on her method of care.
"I know, but this is normal my love. You had nothing to say when we were us." Sophia said, lightly mocking her future wife.
"We were nineteen, that's quite different!" Yn said, her head rising instantly.
"Of course, and you've never had a girlfriend before me, right?!" putting her hands on her hips, Sophia looked menacingly at Yn, who just let out an embarrassed laugh.
"So where do they go?" Rubbing the back of her neck, Yn tried to change the subject as quickly as possible.
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girl-lostconnection · 10 hours ago
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Continuation that I promised to come back with as a response to this ask
Simon doesn’t think much before choosing military. He’s never been much for academics and military at least guarantees some stable income.
Yeah, at the expense of his health and possibly life but well, at least he gets to make something out of himself. (At least he gets away from home and dad and heavy Manchest skies)
Simon can’t stand the thought of you “settling” for him.
Because you are bloody brilliant, you are soft and beautiful and strong. And impossibly, you love him.
You haven’t said it yet, you are keeping it close to your heart but you don’t need to — it’s something even he can see.
Simon wants to be something worthy of that love.
He wasn’t sure what he expected when he announced that he’s going away to serve in military but it definitely wasn’t this panicked look in your eyes and trembling hands because hey…hey hey hey, it’s okay, love, it’s not permanent, yeah? He will come back to you, of course he will, sweetheart, do you think he’d just leave the best thing ever happened to him?
Darling, you are everything and he’s just a kid from a broken home and broken family and he wants to be something. He wants to feel that he actually deserves all that love and care.
He wants to know that he is something to be proud of, that you won’t be wasting away with someone like him.
Your future is bright even if you don’t get into fancy university or college, but Simon is bottom of the barrel in the grander scheme of things.
He wants to work for his place by your side.
He wants to come back and know that he deserves be with you, that he deserves to ask for you to stay with him. Forever and always.
But it all can wait because for now he wraps himself around you — tall and lanky, sharp angles softening around you, short tight kisses to the crown of your head.
He’s gonna come back, love, he promises.
Simon holds you tight and ignores the way his own eyes sting because god, the time would crawl while he’s away from you. Because he never wants to spend another day without you but he knows that if he doesn’t do something to prove to himself and everyone else that he can make something of himself…he will regret it for the rest of his life.
So he rasps out “write to me, will ya, luv?”, thumbs swiping away your tears, backpack slinged over his shoulder, your scarf wrapped around his neck.
And he’s so scared, he’s so fucking scared because it will take him at least few years before he can come back. And what if you meet someone else? What if someone who’s already worthy of your softness comes by when he’s out there bleeding and clawing his way up?
What if he comes back changed and you won’t want him anymore?
What if-what if-what if-what if.
But you kiss him before he goes and it’s salty from tears, it’s desperate and it’s so hungry he remembers that even if you didn’t have anyone you two always had each other. Nothing would change it.
All he can do is jump off the cliff and hope that his wings appear on the way down.
You are both crying when he finally gets on the bloody bus, eyes red-rimmed and noses sniffling but you pepper his wet face with kisses, hiss that he has to come back, that you will kill him if he won’t.
And Simon can’t help but laugh — sound wet and gurlgy from the mucus and all the water but he’s smiling again, eyes impossibly soft because god, you truly are something, aren’t you, love?
“You are magic, luv. Never forget tha’. Never forget me, olright? I’ll come back”, he sounds almost reverent, voice thick with devotion and something else, hands holding your face like the most precious thing in the world.
He’ll come back. Just wait for him, okay?
Goodbye, love.
And goodnight.
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grapejuicebrat · 1 day ago
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champagne coast - r.c.
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where rafe has to watch you moving on.
warnings: mentions of smut, kissing, swearing, heavy angst, might be a happy ending, rafe tries to be better.
notes: SHES BAAAACK. and a little reminder: english is not my first language so be nice! x
my masterlist
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“i want you to be happy rafe, that’s all i ever wanted”
but what if he can’t be happy without you? what if just your presence made rafe smile? if you want him to be happy, why did you leave? those questions were never asked but god, rafe still do want to know all the answers.
watching you moving on is hard. the first time rafe saw you after the break up, your eyes were red from crying. you never smiled. never wanted to pretend that you’re ok. you still loved rafe after all. even if he was a drug addict, even if he was a mean grumpy man. you really wanted to see rafe as an old rafe who tried to not hate on pogues. who tried to catch up with his sister and be a good older brother.
he really tried to be better. for you. for your future family.
he even wanted to marry you. of course, part of him understands that all those thoughts were in his head because he wanted you to stay with him. maybe he could get you pregnant with his baby. having a little copy of you with those big doe eyes was everything he ever wanted. but looking back, it wasn’t possible. not anymore.
sitting in a country club and watching you working hard was difficult. in the beginning of your relationship rafe made that clear. he never ever wanted you to work there again. not because he wanted you to be in a golden cage, just because men in this club were disgusting. rafe would never forget how you cried in his shirt about another nasty comment about her body. that’s why you decided to quit your job and instead of being a waitress you waited at home for rafe, making a dinner for you two and being like a housewife.
you changed rafe in a lot of ways. so now he doesn’t even want to punch this motherfucker jj in the face, because he is clearly flirting with you. after all, he promised you to fight with his anger.
the last thing rafe wants to do is disappoint you again.
“bro, there many other bitches, just forget about her” kelce said to rafe, laughing.
rafe’s eyes shifted to kelce, anger bubbling up in his blood. nobody gets to talk about you like that. even if you were the one to break up with him, you did it for best.
“if you try to say stupid shit like that again, i won’t even hesitate to punch you in a fucking face. you don’t know anything, motherfucker”.
it was the first time rafe didn’t let his friends say something disrespectful towards a girl.
you would be proud of him, that’s for sure.
after two shitty weeks of your break up, rafe saw you smiling for the first time. and he could swear, his heart melted. of course he wanted you to be happy to, even if it does mean that he won’t be included in your life anymore. as much as it hurts to say, maybe in some time you will start a family with a guy that really deserves you. and rafe always said to you that he didn’t deserve you. well, that’s true. he never deserved your kindness, your patience and mostly, your love.
after a long month, rafe could proudly say that he didn’t do coke for a month and two weeks. he didn’t drink either, except one bottle of a beer at the party. he wanted to start a new life, to try to be someone who would deserve you even if you doesn’t want him anymore.
and of course, you knew about this changes. you promised yourself to keep an eye on him if anything happens. and you were really happy to see him like this. without his stupid friends, that you never liked. without being high and drunk. at some time you would think that it’s your old rafe. who you used to know. and your heart would skip a heartbeat. after all, you still loved him. you will always love him.
sometimes you wanted to kiss him like you used to. to hug him, whisper an “i love you” and kiss like there was no tomorrow. you wanted to feel his hands on your neck, on your waist, everywhere. you missed this feeling of being loved by him, you missed his big eyes and his perfect smile. you missed those rare times you two made love to each other. of course you were obsessed with his dominant side in sex but oh god, when he would lay on you and hug you, and his dick was buried deep in your pussy and only god knows how many times he said that he loved you.
you would look at him in a country club, scared that some chick would hug him and sit in his lap. but not in a month, or two. not after a year after your break up, he still didn’t bring anybody. and if topper told you the truth, he refused to even look at some girl. except you.
there were still some rare moments when you would just sit in your kitchen and there will be only one question.
“what if we were still together”
you tried to imagine your life with rafe, how would everything be okay. and you cried. every time.
after another long night in an empty bad you’ve had enough. even if it is the biggest mistake you’ve ever made, you didn’t want this to be the end. not like that. when everything could possibly be better. when rafe at least tries to be better. because you still love him and some part of you hopes he still does love you. so you made your choice right away, getting your phone from the table.
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notes: end sucks, i know. but i am still proud of this one. waiting for your comments!
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ralfmaximus · 1 day ago
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okay, so do you actually have faith this entire "democracy" thing will work out for the US, or are you being nice? because youre one of the few people on this hellsite that has any damn sense and i've spent the last few months in a bit of a panic. i cant trust my own judgment anymore
It'll work out! There will be genuinely good things happening in our future.
But make no mistake: we'll go through hell to get there. The next four years is gonna be rough. People are going to die.
MAGA assholes feel empowered now because they managed to hijack our democratic process. But they're like the dog who catches the car; what the fuck do they DO with it?? Government is hard. None of Trump's people are serious choices to govern. What they WANT is personal enrichment; to loot the coffers and kill their enemies. But once extremists start cleaning house then everyone becomes the enemy. And MAGA is already fighting among themselves. It's like if 500 bank robbers all robbed the same bank at the same time, and now their arms are so full of bulging bags of money they can't fit through the vault door. Now they're fighting.
Their hatred & thirst for 'revenge' will be their undoing. Like I've said previously, all it takes is a few flipped Congressional seats and it's Game Over for them. MAGA actually does best when they're a minority.
We just gotta survive until that happens. Possibly as early as the 2026 midterms.
What that means is conserving your energy for that time when it's needed. Avoid doom scrolling. MSNBC and CNN/CBS/ABC (etc) are entertainment services, not news. They exist to enrage & inflame, not inform. Their profits go up when they hook you on whatever stupid shit Trump just said.
Instead, check out What The Fuck Just Happened Today? which is a delightful summary of important daily news, curated as bullet points. You can drill down to learn more, but usually it's enough just to keep tabs. Without, y'know, losing hours doom scrolling.
So yeah, I really am optimistic that we'll survive. Most of us, anyway. We just gotta find ways to protect the most vulnerable among us until the immediate danger passes.
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dollsahoy · 2 days ago
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I am aware of what's going on out there. I am working out my feelings about it it in places that aren't here.
Here is where I am choosing to encourage people to use what they have and make things. It's not healthy to dedicate your every thought to catastrophe. Brains need breaks. Being hard on yourself for not doing every possible world-saving thing serves no purpose. Ever.
Using things you already have? That is their purpose.
You're not getting back the money spent on them, and you probably don't have as much money to buy things anymore, anyway. Use the things you got in the past to make stuff while you move inexorably into the future, alright? It's something you can control.
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dragoon811 · 1 year ago
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How do you know when you are done with a relationship
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stealingyourbones · 3 months ago
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Out of all of the people The Ghost King Phantom expected to relate to, it definitely wasn’t the scrawny red headed photographer of the Daily Planet. Jimmy Olsen has gotten so many temporary superpowers over his time being Superman’s friend. Hell, he once gained a 4th dimensional being’s reality warping abilities when he was given said dimensional being’s powers during a fight. Sure there’s a dozen or so heroes with the same amount of powers he has, but none as suddenly granted to them as a all powerful god that can relate to a teenager.
#bones speaks#hi this is bones in the future: below tags I do mean but I was Not Sober while writing them so they may have severe spelling errors#bones prompts#dpxdc#dp x dc#just google the amount of times Jimmy has had powers and what they are. I just read a comic#where the F PLOT of all things is Jimmy getting superpowers and causing havoc in Metropolis. that’s how frequent this is#the all powerful god powers was in a recent Batman/Superman Worlds Finest issue where he got Mxyzptlk’s powers#like guys. there are SO many heroes that have more powers than Danny in DC.#off the top of the dome I can only name a few (in my defense I am Not Sober so memory is Not Good:)#Raven. The Spectre. Superman. The Atom. Batman (temporary powers). Dr Fate. Martian Manhunter#and I could name more if my memory wasn’t shot rn#this is a mini rant in the tags but I’m so tired of the ‘Danny has so many superpowers it would stump DC’#it would for sure shock them. but they wouldn’t be surprised. why are they all so shocked from Danny’s arrival?#I’ve made many posts about how much more interesting Danny simply being in the JL like it’s just another Tuesday would be interesting#so many folks enjoy the discovery aspect of Danny and not the part where he’s alreaady a JL member and is#*isnt OP. it’s so much more interesting to write a character with flaws. make him regular powered and able to be struck down by a Big Bad#and not just his weaknesses. he’s been beaten to shit by ghosts before. the angst possibilities is crazy.#Billy Batson looking at a kid nearly his age get hurt more and more by Black Adam? Fear Gas setting him on a rampage in Gotham absolutely#destroying his perception of what being safe is anymore. Lex Luther finding his weakness and wrecking his shit#it could be SUCH an interesting direction to take dpxdc but no one does. when I write prompts with those ideas they make a fraction of the#notes of the prompts where I pander and have batfam in them. diversity of ideas in fandom is what makes us strong. keep the new and#unorthodox ideas flowing. it feels like you’re swimming upstream but it’s worth it to help a fandom grow
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tev-the-random · 2 months ago
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"Aw man, what are they gonna do with Shadow now that he got his closure with Maria's wish and everything? What sort of story can he possibly have after that?"
*points frantically at Sonic 06*
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crownedwille · 6 months ago
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#some thoughts incoming idk if i should share but i need to put them somewhere#it's hard being in the yr fandom since the finale when you don't share the same vision and opinion as the rest#and people make future wilmon posts or write post s3 fics (which many exist now) they just don't align with your idea at all#and they're not exciting to me at all and the whole concept just makes me upset#i don't wanna imagine Wille as a 'normal' person (not that that's ever possible anyway which the show loves to ignore)#like I'm sorry but i didn't come to the show to watch an ordinary love story and have them lead an ordinary life#the idea of Wille being a future king and them navigating that royal life together is so much more interesting#i hate that that isn't canon anymore and when ppl make posts about them it's not about that or that would only be seen as a negative thing#i don't wanna imagine a life where they are 'normal' that isn't appealing to me at all and it sucks seeing everyone embrace it#and it's like you're not allowed to want something else or think differently bc that makes you the bad person and you're just wrong#i can't be excited about their future (also bc i don't really see them going strong in the future with how they messed them up in s3)#(i also didn't want to know what could possibly happen in the future i wanted that to stay open and just be in the present)#and seeing everyone else excited and happy about it makes you feel horrible and very alone and disconnected in the fandom#i don't wanna take it away from them but i also would love to see other takes but that's basically impossible now#am i the only person who feels this way or are there any other who can relate? pls let me know#i already feel like ppl are gonna attack me for this but it's been hard especially now with Simon's month and seeing so many interpretation#navigating ao3 has also become difficult now#it's hard finding fics to read where wille stays crown prince and you don't have to be scared for that to change#i just can't read any canon compliant fics anymore and i hate it bc i hate to disagree with canon#i normally don't do that bc canon is important to me and i don't want to reject it and create my own fantasy#and that's what's upsetting#anyway sorry i had to write this#personal
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monstermoviedean · 2 months ago
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disclaimer that i am very casually interested in tarot and not a believer that cards can predict your life in any meaningful way. that being said there is a weird sort of comfort in sitting down and being like ok tarot. shit's fucked. and then the cards turn up like they're saying yeah, sorry, shit is, in fact, fucked.
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spaceratprodigy · 11 months ago
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🎉 [ Art from 2022-2023 ] 🎉
Happy Birthday to my most favorite person in the world, the love of my life 🖤
I still can't believe this'll make our 10th year of being best friends and even more I can't believe we get to celebrate our 8th anniversary this summer 💖💕
Commission Info | Ko-Fi | My Links
#I was gonna type out more but I decided I didn't want to be too sappy and emotional on main#so much has happened in these past 10 years#I can't believe I made it this far I really did not think I was going to have a future#but I did and I do#I have the most wonderful partner who I connect with in a way I never thought was possible#I am capable of being loved I am capable of loving in return#I learned how to love myself and be unapologetically myself for myself#I lost a lot of people and some very much for the better#I've become so so much happier my god I never thought I'd ever know what this felt like#I'm still angry and numb and having to battle depression but I've grown I've finally become someone worth being proud of#I'm no longer letting that anger and grief and everything that comes with it take over#I can't believe I've actually become gentler and kinder#I can't believe I've actually made genuine friends with people who are nice and caring and supportive#and are actually happy to see me and not trying to take advantage of me at every opportunity I'm finally seen as a person#I can't believe I'm finally in a safe environment I don't have to be terrified anymore I'm not going to be hurt anymore#I can't believe how far I've come creatively bc of how much bf has supported my every passion wholeheartedly#he is the reason I have a drawing tablet he is the one who encourages me and cheers on everything I do#god I still don't know how I could ever in my life thank you enough for every goddamn wonderful thing you do for me#you have changed everything for the better none of this would have ever happened if it wasn't for you#it's always been you#I fucking love you#more than anything in this universe and the next#forever and always#my art#glad I listened to my first tag lmao
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cheriafreya · 2 months ago
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finally decided to uninstall Reddit to avoid seeing more HSR leaks, I don't wanna ruin myself the experience of Amphoreus and this game's future events :/
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giantkillerjack · 2 years ago
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Ya know. I spent most of my life with horrible painful soul-crushing social anxiety.
And after about 25 years of continuous hard work, suddenly, people started pointing out - to my utter bafflement - that I had, in fact, achieved my lifelong dream of being charismatic. I'm 29 now; I feel comfortable in most social situations, and it is a very rare person whom I cannot make laugh.
I am, undoubtedly, finally, charismatic.
But do you know what I found?
I found that now that I have an understanding of which social rules serve which functions -- Now that I have an understanding of just how much damage my awkwardness was doing to people, well,
I found that, actually, my awkwardness never really hurt anyone at all. People were just judgmental dicks to me about it.
Now that I have the skill-level to (most of the time) creatively vocalize what is in my head as soon as I think it and without fear, I can confirm once and for all what I had always suspected:
I was worth talking to when I was quiet.
I was worth talking to when I was awkward, and when the words in my head took time and patience to hear, and when most of my jokes didn't land. I was worth talking to the whole time.
So I just... I hope that if you've ever wondered whether you are worth communicating with, the answer is yes. Absolutely yes. Each of us has a soul worth sharing - and if you and I were talking, I would happily wait for you to speak (or communicate in other ways) without condescending, and I would never shame you for that harmless awkwardness that so many people feel the need to violently stomp out.
You are worth talking to. You just are. And you deserve people who will speak to you with kindness, with patience, and with the basic immutable respect owed to all people.
(I talk about this with some frequency, both on tumblr and in real life. At some point, maybe I'll gather all my thoughts on the matter into one post. At some point, I wrote about my personal experience trying to build my social skill. But I felt the need to say at least a little bit tonight after seeing this other lovely post, and I'm glad I did. It will happen again.)
#original#social anxiety#autism#that one post#actually autistic#self-diagnosis is valid - in case that last tag implies otherwise to anyone. i think it just denotes i am an autistic and not just an ally.#social skills#socially awkward#socially anxious#autistic positivity#autism positivity#like actually genuinely who does it hurt if i tell a joke that doesn't land? esp if the joke is not about another person#this is not a live comedy show this is life ya gotta learn to say 'ah well they can't all be golden!'#which btw is a line i use when my own jokes don't land and it usually plays pretty well actually. i've got a higher hit rate but#genuinely they just can't all be good! anyway i go into that in the post linked at the end there i think#people can tell when you're not sure of yourself socially and a lot of folks instinctively use that against you. and i am here to say that#it's fucked up that they are doing that and they need to step off actually. imagine getting to decide on which social cues are#acceptable and then using that power to be unkind. fuckin gross. i regret so deeply each time in my life i have made that choice.#being a kid who is abused like that so often it was eager to power trip when i met kids more awkward than myself. but it was wrong#and i regret it. and i am proud to say i haven't done that in a long time and instead when i find myself with that power i try to say#actually what do YOU want? to the people shyer than me.#i'm pretty rad now is what i'm saying lol#like all the ways that having a good social stat has improved my life just made me realize what bullshit it is that this was necessary#doing what I did is not desirable or possible for everyone. they deserve just as much out of life as i do.#side note: i think I've actually surpassed a lot of neurotypicals who had never even had to think about social rules 🤣.#like I feel no competition with other people who have struggled socially but now that I'm more charming than people who were dicks to me#I do feel like fuck you!! I win!!!! I can finally see enough of the full picture to say that your arbitrary rules were FUCKING ARBITRARY#I'm also aware of the fact that not everyone finds me charismatic but i am. in all the ways that matter to me. and I'm still growing!#note to future jack: you did save these posts in your notes app on the day this was written.#tbh i am often still awkward i am just not sorry anymore if i'm not hurting ppl. 'confident and awkward' really throws 'em for a loop! XD
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miesozernacma · 4 months ago
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watched inside out 2.
what ive learned thus far is im actually being controlled a whole lot by my personified anxiety head creature because im so often lost in potential scenarios its actually quite detrimental to my existence actually
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binders-and-beanies · 8 months ago
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Pondering bottom surgery in the tags I mf guess
#I’ve been. thinking abt bottom surgery again after having accepted for a while that I would probably never get it#for context early on in my transition I was dead set on phallo but then T and my other surgeries satisfied me enough to not need it#+ for phallo I would have had to keep an arm or leg free of tattoos and I just did not want to wait on that#not considering it would probably be at least a decade. tattoos were and are more important#+ the more I started to enjoy using what I have I was like. it is simply not medically necessary anymore#like would I like to have a **** yes. do I need one to live a happy life no#being bi complicates things for me too bc it depends a little bit who I marry#don’t want to tailor my body to a specific relationship esp if it doesn’t last forever but it does make a difference#current partner is nonbinary and wants phallo so that does not make things simpler lol#I want a body that allows the most affirming possible relationship w the person I intend to marry#I also don’t want to end up hindering things w future partners should that not happen#anyway I say all this to say. I had never considered meta as an option bc I didn’t think it would do much for me#lot of effort and money and healing for not as drastic a change. wouldn’t solve my biggest bottom dysphoria issues#however. starting to think it could be the middle ground I’m looking for as a gnc/genderfluid person#it would be less surgeries. less complicated n expensive. less changes to my current anatomy#esp if I don’t do everything you Can do w meta. I could do like half of all that or less#I don’t wanna risk giving up the things I can do now without knowing if I’ll enjoy the new possibilities#but this could be a way to just kinda feel more affirmed without it changing my life all that much#I think just the act of undergoing bottom surgery would be affirming. like I’ve done Everything I’m a binary male thru and thru. transexual#and I wouldn’t have to keep wondering if I’ll do it someday or if I should#not that I can any time soon I’m uninsured. insurance prob wouldn’t even cover it#but just. the more I look into it and think abt it + the more serious my relationship gets the more I lean towards it#my partner talking increasingly abt wanting bottom surgery asap is influencing me too ngl not even in a jealousy way#just. I can’t deal w the possibility of a partners phallo fucking up my relationship w my body Again. I would need to know what I want#man. I can’t even go to therapy to talk thru it. on account of being uninsured#mine#txt#personal
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