#what if i sobbed?? for a long time???
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my baby *sobs*
#baby fool#i cradle#shed tears over baby fool today#what do u mean the buckkeep kids threw rocks at him#what if i sobbed?? for a long time???#rote#realm of the elderlings#me vs tumblr compression#>:(#robin hobb#fanart#the farseer trilogy#the fool#fitz and the fool
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whatever happens, please don’t break
#god not a fucking DAY goes by where i don’t think of that one interview and this quote#does anybody have it word for word? please? i’ll pay you#literally every single time i think about how kunikida as w character was MADE for dazai. specifically to share his suffering#i actually sob into my hands because that means they were both destined for tragedy together and the long dark road they will walk#will at least not be lonely. because they have each other. they are each other’s light in the darkness.#DO YOU UNDERSTAND#bro the fact that kunikida is painfully aware of the imperfection of the world and how he still continues to fight for his ideals#paralleling dazai who finds humanity beautiful but cannot become attached bc he feels alienated from emotion#THE WAY THEY COULD HELP EACH OTHER????? SICK SICK SICK I AM SICK#i love kunikidazai sm i wish more ppl could see the potential#but some of you aren’t ready for the sheer perfection of their dynamic#also i’ve noticed that i am only capable of drawing dazai properly when it’s with kunikida what’s up with that 💀#and sorreyy i know their height difference isn’t THAT big but i didn’t realize until i was halfway into the coloring 😔💔#osamu dazai#dazai osamu#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#lotus draws
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Order Tracking Issues with USPS
Okay so. I think that this issue I've been having for months now isn't just me any more. Maybe not my carrier, either. Packages I ship with USPS are not being scanned. If you order from me, and your order says
I thought I was just having a horrible experience with my mail carrier alone.. But the facilities aren't scanning my packages either in transit- until it's scanned the first and only time at delivery. This keeps happening.
And it's not just me! I'm seeing it happen with people I order things from now too! This is from tonight, and I honestly just cried with relief that it's not just me dealing with it.
I'm so, so immensely sorry to everyone who's had this experience also lately and my customers who've sat there wondering if I even shipped things- sometimes for over a MONTH. I'm seriously wondering if there's been internal changes Trump's appointee Louis DeJoy has made that's tearing apart from the inside?? I have no idea.
If you're another seller that's been dealing with this PLEASE chime in.... This has been hurting my mental health for months while I've been feeling like my business is falling apart because of missing packages.
#usps#like... WHAT IS GOING ON???????#I have cried SO MUCH the past few months over these issues#I am SO SORRY to everyone who ordered holiday items who won't get them in time or have no idea where they are#i promise ive been fucking sobbing over this for so long
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heeyyy gaaanggg
the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.
#my art#digital art#digital painting#fanart#resident evil 7#ethan winters#goddd PLEAAASEEEE#i havent known if i was gonna post this or not multiple times in the process of drawin this. but ultimately i spent too much time on it to#NOT post it. embarrassment be damned#but at the same time what am i even doin yknow. what is this what is goin on pleaaseee PLEASEEEEE#I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT RESIDENT EVIL!!! I DONT KNOW N O T H I NG I KNOW LESS THAN NOTHING#HOW?? HOW DID I GET HERE??? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN???? i know exactly the answer to all those questions but it still boggles me how fast this#happened. usually it takes WEEKS if not MONTHS for me to start makin fanart. this was faaasttttt TOO FAST and im like. genuinely constantly#thinkin about this game. im ALWAYS thinkin about this game. part of why this took me so long to do is cause i always wanna play re7 or thin#about re7 in a strange and deranged way. ive actually genuinely been SICK WHAT HAPPENEDDDDDD#im losing it!! anyways this took me a looonggg ass time and i redrew it soo many timmmessss#i did like. 3 lineart passes. the album version i did 3 shading passes. i really struggled!! and ultimately i dont know how i feel about it#like i kinda resent it. for takin so long and makin me suffer so much#never again. never again will i spend that much time on a drawing. i HATE when drawins take a long time. i HATE that. it makes me madddd#ive been insane. ive been so insane. and im not gettin better like i cant sleep sometimes cause im thinkin about this game and this guy and#that gal like i think about them!! so! so much!! oh my god!!#in the time it took me to finish this ive done like 10 sketches for other pieces like. and ive had like 3 ideas ive written down.#and like 50 that i havent written or sketched.#IVE WRITTEN POETRY!! P O E T R Y !!!#i write the occasional poem when im feelin some kinda profound emotion but i NEVER write poetry about media SOBBING#anyways thats the post i think this is the beginnin of the end so lets hold hands and pray. ugh sorry if i get sick. im shakin.
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Part 1 - Appreciation post for all the TFP universe Autobot mugshot cameos (known and unknown) in RID2015 3x25 (even if the context is that they've been OUSTED against their will)
#transformers rid2015#not me and my emotional crutch show comforting my broken soul after rewatching TFP for the nth time#every cameo and reference is another good hit of the Good Stuff#look at how g1 they all got i'm sobbing#smokey got so BUFF#sunstreaker confirmed canon!#boy do i have an angsty fic idea that explains sideswipes abandonment trauma#please tell me what ironhide was like i need to know#they included seaspray??? but he's dead jim#ultra magnus be snatched as ever#tfp universe wouldnt do mirage dirty like ROTB did#KNOCKOUT NOOOOO#is that sandstorm? I cannot tell because the resolution is GARBAGE#prowl look like he got big tiddies in this universe too <3#jetfire my g1 husband what happened to you#trailbreaker??? forever a highly functional alcoholic idc what you say#TRACKS MY REBEL SON#oh NO not the RESCUE BOTS they have done no wrong!!!#powerglide??? he ought to have been in there for as many times as the cons quoted him in this series#gears and.... is that moonracer???? I can only infer by color#BLASTERRRRR oh what I wouldn't give for a blaster/soundwave throwdown#oh this is sandstorm for SURE (then who's the other guy???) and my man KUP#oh no look how good looking they made roddy </3#ELITA AAAAA#wreckgar??? my trash son???#long post#maccadams#please bear with my internal dialogue#is that 6th one supposed to be tailgate??? wasn't him being dead like an ENTIRE plot point for all of TFP lol
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thorin this, thorin that,
what about how Bilbo probably couldn’t meet pippin and merry’s eyes for the longest time because every time he saw them, all he could see was fili and kili ☹️
how many times did bilbo almost slip up and call the hobbits by names that were not their own but all bilbo could see was that same mischievous twinkle he saw in those two young dwarves eyes?
how many years would it be before the hobbits realized why gandalf was so hard on them? why bilbo had stopped looking at them with such devastation on his face but could not hide the anguish in his eyes?
bilbo never told any of the young hobbits his full journey, always making everything seem more heroic and thrilling than the profound loss everyone suffered in The Company. It probably wasn’t until Frodo left with his uncle that merry and pippin realized why the old hobbit could never truly meet their eyes when sam let them read the book containing both of their journeys ☹️
#bilbo baggins#we always talk about bilbo and thorins tragedy#but never about how that heartbreak and devastation rolled over into the rest of bilbos life#i just know he couldn’t bring himself to tell frodo to not bring merry and pippin around#logically he knew fili and kili were dead#but at least for a split second when he saw the hobbits he could fool himself into thinking they were still there with him#frodo baggins#merry brandybuck#pippin took#merry and pippin#lotr makes me wanna sob all of the time#i wonder if that final goodbye in rivendell was the only time bilbo was able to truly meet the hobbits eyes and see them for themselves#and not for his long lost friends#still fully believe that it was a struggle for him to see frodo too#his curls looked EXACTLY like thorins#no wonder why bilbo became such a shut in#the whole world was a reminder of what he lost#lord of the rings#the hobbit
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god i know i said i was tired of making eveerything sad but just imagine timber those first few months of reconnecting and they're both drunk on tim's boat, laying on the deck staring up at the stars and bear turns over to look at tim, his eyes are sad and wet, and he reaches out to touch tim's face as if to make sure tim is really there and not an illusion and tim whispers, "bear?" and bernard smiles a little brokenly and goes, "so how long do i have you for this time?"
#tim fully sober now: what do you mean? i'm right here bear#bear still drunk: i got you for almost a whole year last time. how long before you leave this time?#bear: 2 years? 6 months?#tim sadly: you can have me forever bear#bear laughing: i don't even get you that long in my dreams#bear smiles reaching out to poke tim's face: don't worry tim! anytime you want to come back‚ i'll be right here.#god tim who's constantly leaving and bear who knows but cant help letting him comeback into his life again and again#you cannot tell me that bear went to that first date in urban legends expecting tim to stay#he went to that date expecting to get his heart broken again but he loves this boy so he goes anyway#tim who always leaves and bear who waits patiently everytime#sorry im like sobbing in the library#bear is so 'right where you left me' coded#bear who loves tim so much he'll let tim break his heart again and again#head in hands head in hands#dc#tim drake#bernard dowd#timbern#timber
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jason accidentally trauma-dumps to this masked vigilante who he’s somehow immediately comfortable trusting while willis todd who is not dead and is very much still alive (but still hasn’t told his only living child yet) is internally screaming “WHAT DID THEY DO TO MY PRECIOUS BABY BOY?!?!?!?”
#dc comics#dc universe#dcu#batman#red hood#jason todd#jason peter todd#jason was never the angry robin#wingman#willis todd#nah because why does dc make poor people be completely awful people?#look if willis todd was awful why does jason love him so much?#good parent willis todd#jason is different from the rest of the bats because unlike them he grieved his parents (especially his mom) long before they died#jason probably found out that willis was presumed dead long after it happened (because he was living on the streets for quite some time)#anyways willis is listening to jason nonchalantly speak about his trauma and is resisting the urge to beat bruce up#willis while carrying a 220 lb crime lord and sobbing: my precious baby what have they done to you?#danny todd (jason’s canonical older brother) is watching beyond the grave wondering why willis won’t tell jason who he is#jason starts talking about willis and willis is trying his hardest not to cry because he thought jason would hate him but it’s the opposite#like jason has so much love in his heart and honestly i wish someone would actually appreciate that
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Four years later.
Four years later and I'm 15 again. Transported through time to a different freshman year. A different bedroom. A different time.
The same Minecraft server once again on my screen. The same stuffed animals surrounding me. The same cold tears burning in my eyes.
That same sickly ray of hope cutting through my darkened room, rekindling the fading embers of a crushed passion.
#Honestly I did not know that what i needed to cure a creative block was a fucking DSMP stream in 2024 but I guess it was#dream smp#dsmp#dsmp tommy#tommyinnit#jack manifold#good lord its been a long time since I've cracked those tags out#I am fucking sobbing rn idk whats happening#Have those to been stuck there this whole time?#this is litterally the minecraft nostiagia bit#its like an empty server that i know used to be filled with people
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this one's for all the yuri enjoyers out there — nsft under cut
meronia event prompt(s): scar
#death note#mello#near#meronia#meroniaevent#fem mello#fem near#i had fun w this one!! i love drawing yuri even though i dont do it nearly as much as i want lol#also i love drawing bush thumbs up emoji#i let the lines be messier bc my hands have been a little sore and i am not in the mood for linework#and in honor of yuri day i should get to do whatever i want forever peace and love on planet yuri#anyway i didnt know what to do w near's hair but decided to keep it short bc i didnt want to cover her back for composition reasons#sorry for posting so late i woke up at like 10am which is late for me as of late and had school shit to do boooo#also im in the mood to talk so i made a pot pie today (no meat im vegetarian) and i followed no recipes and used my heart to make#it and i did so well it fucks so hard my heart always leads me to greatness and recipes do nothing for me bc im a culinary genius#<-blatantly untrue but we stay silly#oh!!! and also i got a thing in the mail the thing being a weevil plushie i ordered a bit back that i bought on a whim that i should not#have bought bc im saving my money but actually he makes my life a million bajillion times better and i love him dearly#anyway meronia event is making my life so much better i feel 100% better than i did 2 days ago and hopefully the joy this brings#me will stay w me for long enough to get through the rest of my summer classes bc they are killing me lol. my current ones are ending#in like a week or smth but i have 2 more in july *sobs* all this just to graduate a semester early#k anyway enjoy the yuri ...or dont. im not the boss of u. ig
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OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever
#jrwi fanart#cw blood#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#arthur bennett#OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob:#BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay#i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY.#THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL#so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM..#grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that#ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT#arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES#I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM.#I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no#ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE#BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much...#GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that#we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW#he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE..#i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar#I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS#also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that#human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY#i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK#feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh
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ok hear me out, 'The Black Dog' is wolfstar coded and not just because of the literal connection with Sirius Black and his animagus but in general. The Dog is very obviously Sirius and the way she goes on building the first verse of long lost friendship and relationship- "I am someone who until recent events shared your secrets with" and that's easy to tell Sirius and Remus were one half of the Marauders and they were friends, lovers and obviously shared everything with each other. The location is the Marauder's Map and it could possibly be a memory that Sirius can't get out of his head while being in Azkaban that relates closely with Remus who is having the same flashback but at a bar or in a deep emotional capacity when he sees a black dog that reminds him of Siri. "She's too young to know this song" is Tonks (no offence to her but ye) the age gap is there, she was there when Sirius was alive and it was a visual representation of Remus choosing her above him. When Remus steals glances at Sirius when he thinks no one is seeing for 'old habits die screaming' and now he doesn't know what to do with this for he feels Sirius is too lost in despair. Post Azkaban Sirius is "moving through the world heartbroken" and with desires of having a friend in Remus if not a lover. "And it kills me, I don't understand"— is very clearly the chaotic mess inside Siri's head as he takes over his life after 13 years of imprisonment. "Now I wanna sell my house, and set fire to all my clothes," is perhaps the disdain with Grimmauld Palace and his past that he tried so hard to escape haunting him like a full circle. "This tail between your legs, you're leaving" is again his untimely death, too soon and a life too short with great regrets and glorious moments.
You can't tell me this song isn't about Sirius Black
#ttpd#ttpd era#ts ttpd#the tortured poets department#taylor swift#sirius black#song lyrics#the black dog#remus lupin#wolfstar#remus x sirius#harry potter fandom#marauders era#the maruaders#nymphadora tonks#remadora#im just looking too deep at things but I have had this theory for a long time now and I'm not gonna shut up about it#also the line “you deserved a brave man” what a hard hitting line#I'm not sobbing at the reference you are#woah it's unbelievable my good life can't have it with this much angst#I need to read a fic over this matter#as soon as possible
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THIS IS EPIC: THE ITHACA SAGA
i know we all said wed be crying but i didnt expect to be sobbing into my hot chocolate this early in the morning. (spoilers ahead)
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welcome home odysseus, husband to penelope, father of dear telemachus <3
#this is epic#epic the musical#oh my god#sang it antinous! got what u had coming tho#hot damn#HIS BOY. TELE HIS BOY STOP I CANT#will sob over odypen later yall i promise#GET THEIR ASSES ODY#be the moster rawr rawr#yall have no idea how many times my laptop crashed. the music was just too epic im afraid#ody and tele are embracing & singing while covered in blood and viscera. i need to see this in the animatics pls and ty#ATINA <3#GOOD GOD THE PAIN#the finale#hoo boy#THE VENGEANCE MOTIF WTF JORGE#the callbacks are insane#how long has it been#sdfghgfdsedrftg#i am ded#i am died#i will never recover from this#happy holidays#*sobs uncontrollably*#odysseus#penelope#telemachus#ithaca fam#:')))))))))#IM SO SORRY I FORGOR THE WARNING AND THE BREAK
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Might see if i cant do a little reload to the neve/bellara choice in act 3 (??? Or is it late act 2 i fr do not know) just so i can record davrin stopping deirdre from going after bellara bc that scene and the 3 of them in general live rent free in my head and i was paused right after for so long that the recording i thought i saved was just. My paused screen of elgarnan lmao
#dragon age#datv#dragon age the veilguard#datv spoilers#dragon age the veilgaurd spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age davrin#bellara lutare#ship: blight polycule#im sooo obsessed with them btw#immediate post game deirdre sobs into bellaras lap fun fact 🤓#its the first time i think they breakdown in front of everyone#bc they were so worried about bellara#and even though she isnt fine per se#shes back and ALIVE and thats all that matters in the moment#the three of them are just in like. a group hug/cuddle/sob session for a minute#i think davrin finally has a moment where hes like ‘him alive#theyre alive. i didnt need to die holy shit#and while yes he does have that moment in a sense#you cant tell me he wasnt still seeing a world where one of them died#the fights never over and wardens have focused on sacrifice for so long#which is why i find his and deirdres dynamic so interesting in game fun fact#deirdre refuses to die in any way#they WILL survive no matter what its why theyre a warden to begin with#meanwhile davrin is so sure he’ll die#mainly early-ish game but still. hes focused on the sacrifice. on the whatever it takes#hes like. ‘i have to live to do my job but what will i go back to. am i a warden if i dont sacrifice all i am’#anyway. blight polycule my beloved.#this is not a good analysis by any means btw. im half rambling and im worried im gonna have a nosebleed#i love them sm. i a post in the works about how they approach the blight btw
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huge shoutout to Big Finish and GDL for tearing my heart out through my throat and wringing it out like a towel
#god. fuck.#this one hit so close to home it might as well be in my backyard#when i say i full on sobbed i mean it#i can’t tell you how many times i replayed the attempt scene and just. crying#ianto jones my heart breaks and sings for you#suicidal thoughts/ideations ache in such a unique and startling way and this is exactly what it’s like#i haven’t experienced anything that resonated with me this much in so damn long#if by some chance one of the folks at Big Finish or GDL stumble upon my silly little curse upon this earth that is my blog:#sorry about that. but also: thank you. thank you so much for making this.#torchwood#ianto jones#big finish#torchwood: broken#torchwood audio dramas#my edit
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genshin impact gif challenge ✦
[1/?] story quests → diluvies chapter, act i: the remains of the past day
"you will see much in the human world, from the delightful to the depressing. and one day, when you have dwelt among humanity long enough, you will be placed to bring judgment over all as the spokesperson for fontaine's past."
#genshin impact#genshinedit#genshinimpactedit#genshinet#neuvillette#mine*#neuvillette*#gifchallenge*#*incoherent sobbing* NEUVILLETTEEEEEEEE#i love his sq so fucking much it made me sob like a baby after i was done with it#(still makes me sob every time i think about this quest ngl)#you don't understand i had venti's sq as my favourite for So Long bc of the emotional impact it left on me after it was done#and then this dropped in 4.1 and it immediately rose up to be my fave THAT is how good it is to me#everything about neuvi just completely shattered my initial expectations of him and it includes this quest it's soskjdhfskj#NEUVILLETTE I LOVE U#im so normal about him i swear#also i'll be making a separate gifset for him later down the line for this challenge#bc he's very lore relevant im waiting to see if he'll get more involvement in a possible interlude quest or if he gets a second sq#same goes for furina im just waiting until 4.6 to see what happens basically LMAO
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