#what happened to the “He's a great sorcerer”? why don't he use magic? why only use punchie? XD

[babyblueetbaemonster]

Thank you for saving me, with your fists, punch the necromancers to death.

[arguablysomaya]

please, elaborate on merlin bbc propaganda and stuff

okay basically:

bbc merlin is a show taking place during a genocide

camelot for 20 years has been genociding and ethnically cleansing everyone who can use magic, including magical creatures. They were all either exiled, fled, live in refugee camps or in hiding, and a great many were executed and slaughtered. Generally speaking, life is inhospitable in camelot for magic users.

And the show makes no attempt to hide this fact, either. We see multiple times over the death and destruction this genocide has wraught, and how radicalized most of the remaining magic population is because of it. For the past few decades, camelot has essentially been doing 2 things: persecuting magic users, and defending itself from vengeful/liberationist magic users

the king (uther) believes that magic users are (stop me if you've heard this one) corruptive, shifty, and evil. he's always paranoid that a magic user will take their revenge on him. and in a way, he's right: there are in fact a lot of magic users eager to kill him, but given the whole Great Purge and literally drowning children thing, you'd thing the show would be a bit more sympathetic to their plight. Nope.

in come merlin and gaius, our two main magic users. merlin is the protagonist, and gaius his benevolent mentor, so the audience is primed to be on their side. only one problem: from bascially the beginning of the series, these two are nothing more than agents for the very state carrying out the genocide. they devote their time to wholeheartedly defending camelot, especially from magic users, something they are rightfully called traitors for. they actively intervene to prolong the lives (and therefore regimes) of both arthur and uther, despite neither king showing any real interest in freeing their people. gauis represents the "diversity" of a genocidaire state; as someone uther only keeps around so long as he shuns any involvement with magic except what helps uther carry put his genocide, gaius hides and rejects every marginalized part of himself that threatens his access to power. even as a member of the oppressed class, he aids and abets the oppressors every step of the way. merlin, as an extremely powerful agic user in hiding, follows suit. the thing is, like so many other minority collaborators, this doesn't actually buy them safety, since they are Other, they still have to walk around on eggshells knowing one wrong move could get their heads chopped off. but this action of defending a regime that would kill you without a second's hesitation is presented as noble and heroic in the show, when in reality it's stupid at best and evil at worst. merlin and gaius might save a token kid from being brutally murdered, but they will never let anyone take action, let alone take action themselves, to proactively stop the brutality.

merlin is literally the most powerful sorcerer alive. if he wanted to, he could create a more fair, more just, better world in a blink. instead, he spends his time pretending to be a hapless servent, messing around with his war criminal friends, and killing any freedom fighter who dares to even look at the prince or king. why? well, he believes in the institutions (and a prophecy that never comes true... lol). ultimately, merlin and gauis hold the same prejudices and stereotypes about magic users that uther does: that they're untrustworthy, dangerous, and that it would be better for everyone if all but themselves (the good ones) just died or left.

and all the people they're defending the empire against... are other oppressed magic users. the VAST majority of antagonists are either magicians or magic sympathizers. even in the context of a genocide, the show takes the firm stance that the architects of genocide (the literal kings who order it to happen) are just flawed human beings who still don't deserve to be killed, while when the people they seek to wipe out fight back, our protagonists will happily mow them down. the show has no problem with killing people,and even killing innocents is only worthy of a fingerwag. it's fighting for liberation that the show makes the real problem. even when uther finally dies the show plays it like something sad, as if anyone is supposed to feel anything but joy that this old tyrant genocidaire finally kicked the bucket after having been saved a million times over from getting his comeuppance. Every magic user that has genuinely good reasons to want to tear down the kingdom are all painted with the "crazy evil person" brush.

another thing is that this show likes to get ~quirky~ with their agents of the state. along with arthur and merlin come a colorful cast of characters like the knights that you can laugh and cry with. the only problem is that despite how lovable these people are, they're still actively carrying out and enforcing a genocide. it's a bit like those tiktoks of IDF soldiers dancing or proposing. i can't feel for these people because despite seeming like relatable people, they're still engaging in something horrific. you can't escape the fact that these people can only exist in the relatively easy capacity that they do because the empire they work for is brutally repressing and eliminating entire cultures.

but the thing is, this strategy actually works. the fandom is often so taken in by fun character interactions and shipping moments that you can often witness people literally look past, or even praise their acts of genocide. these characters are so charming with each other that you can look past how awfully they treat oppressed people. yay! the prevalence of merthur brings up too many idf pinkwashing parallels it's actually insufferable. i had hoped we left oppressor/oppressed person ships behind in the 2010s but guess it's still around

by the time he takes over as king, the "great, kind" arthur is essentially an IDF soldier who only realized that Killing Is Bad Actually when he's got crosshairs on a random kid. now Reformed (TM), he takes the brave stance that he should only kill the angry bad magic users who try to exact their revenge for the whole genocide thing on him, and the peaceful (more often than not, harmless) magic users should accept the merciful counterplan of ethnically cleansing themselves from the region, or continuing to live in refugee camps, but this time with less threat of massacre. in this show, the only acceptable answer to being genocided is to either lay down and die, hide forever, or displace yourself hoping the empire doesn't come and kill you anyway. fighting back, getting revenge, defending oneself, trying to change things: these are all reserved only for the genocidal state.

in other words, bbc merlin is the exact type of genocide obfuscation that most modern genocides engage in. the suffering of oppressed peoples, even innocents, is a footnote. when they suffer, sometimes it's presented as sad, and other times it's presented as deserved. meanwhile, the suffering of the oppressors, no matter how justifyable, is always landmark and deserves our full attention and sympathies, because the thing about the oppressors is that it's always their story.

(the last thing is a common fantasy problem, which is that when you create stories where different classes have actual, material, biological distinctions, it can end up justifying the oppression. in the real world, there is a very limited range of innate human abilities, and people from across the world are largely evenly matched. but in merlin, a sorcerer actually does pose an increased threat to those around them. in terms of allegory... kinda not the best thing to so without any real refutation to the idea that magic corrupts)

so yeah. that's why i don't fuck with this show even though it's enjoyable to watch.

[raphaellight]

A misconception about Adventures of Merlin (specifically, about Uther)

I had a epifany lately regarding Adventures of Merlin. Everyone is giving Uther a hard time for his treatment of magic, yet it struck me:

He isn't that BAD as it seems.

NO, NO, HEAR ME OUT

He is ruthless, cruel and hatefull classist, also hypocritical for seeking magics help when it was about someone from his family. What I get at, that's not what made him unique inside the world builded in the show. Let's call up some trivia facts.

Merlin knows better than to admit he has magic, even tho he lived all his live outside of Camelot's kingdom (he doesn't do a great job at it, but you get my point, he knew he can't show his magic). And it wasn't because of the execution he witnessed at his arrival. It shocked him, but didn't suprise him. He never question it later.

With-hunter doesn't live in Camelot. He came when Uther called for him. He must have doing his business elsewhere.

Headhunter that brought Freya to Camelot never specified where he caught her. He brought her to Camelot, because Uther payed.

No other kingdom used magic in the open. And it wasn't exacly because of Uther, he was respected, but Camelot wasn't an empire dicating rules for everyone else. It was one of many states present.

Uther was hella respected among other kings, one of the reasons being, he conquered Camelot which was ruled by magic before his rulership.

That shows us, when we look, Uther wasn't a source of hate towards magic. Camelot was known for it's ruthless laws against it, but we never hear about a kingdom, where sorcerors and sorceres are free to practice. Best we've seen were individuals allowed to practice magic as long as it served the kings business. Uther was just a representative of the believe, a leader of a nation that didn't want magic. There was a backstory to it, magic brought Arthur to life, but took Uther's wife. Except, that only made him hate magic more. If it had started the hate itself, Camelot would have to rule over everyone else in order to enforce no magic laws outside it's borders as other Kings wouldn't be so kean to stop magicians from healing people and bringing better harvests every year. Also kings would definitelly treat him very differently thruout the show, kissing his ring and bowing before him, not sit down with him to negotiate the fates of kingdoms.

Uther was bad, but the misconception is that, he is the unique villain inside Merlin's world, while he was just the best at doing what everyone else did as well. Opressing people with gift of magic.

I wrote it partly because it strucked me, but partly because I saw a post hating Uther. Don't get me wrong, he was usually despicable tyrant. But he wasn't always a villain. There were at least phew instances, when he showed he cared for other people, he was very generous for his people, he was a great and smart leader and for last, correct me if I'm wrong, a lot of magical trouble Merlin had to overcome was not tied to any revenge on Uther, just evil people using magic for their own benefit. And that's why he is one of my favourite characters to ever grace the screen. He was a really complex character that just so happened to be in the wrong more than in the right and had his flaws dominate his virtues.

I'm planning to pull a series of posts about hated characters, presenting new perspectives and examples of characters that aren't beloved by everyone, stick with me if you want to see more. Definitelly gonna touch on more magical characters.

[tansyuduri]

Merlin Loregasm Rewatch S1E6 (Part2)

Hi Everyone! Welcome to my rewatch of Merlin focusing on the lore. I am a giant nerd so pretty excited about this. We’re on A REMEDY TO CURE ALL ILLS So this is part two because last time I cut off early because there was so much lore and I accidentally posted it! ANYHOW lets continue.

Great Dragon: 20 years almost a lifetime to make the short journey back to were you begun. OKAY! so asuming Arthur is 21 in his of age ceremony in later season one episode EXCALIBUR, it means Gaius likely has not visited the great dragon since Arthur's birth.

What I find especially intersting here is "Back to where you begun" I'm assuming this means the great dragon and not the caves under Camalot.

I think this could have three meanings. If it's connected to the previous statement of 20 years I think it would imply that the great dragon might have been the one to give Gaius the idea to go to the Priestessess about making Arthur. Then Gaius came back after Ygraine died to be like "Dude WTF" to the Dragon. If the mentioning 20 years is not directly connected to "where you began" it could mean that Gaius somehow started on his journey of learning magic with the great dragon. This could explain more about how he knew Balinor ETC. And would be an interesting detail. Did the dragon teach Gaius magic knowing Merlin would turn up one day? Did Gaius just see the dragon doing a spell and be like THAT I WANT THAT. How much did Gaius study with the dragon vrs the godess priesthood he mentions later vrs books?

ANOTHER possibility is that Gaius used to go to the dragon for advice like Merlin did. I think this is less likely because the dragon at that time would not have been conveniently locked up in the basment.

It could also be both of the top two passabilies!

Great Dragon: You have struggled against his destiny but you can no more prevent it than he can! What is the dragon referring to here? We know Gaius has in fact encouraged Merlin to protect Arthur. ALSO, Merlin has not yet done anything to protect Uther at Gaius's urge yet. Later this episode is the first time he does. Gaius has given Merlin the book of spells to help him learn more powerful magic. Does he mean Gaius's urging not to use magic for little things? coresponding to the "Gaius doesn't like me to use it" line Merlin says to Edwin. I think this is the only thing the dragon can possibly mean. He thinks Merlin should be able to use the magic for many things and Gaius is not encouraging him to use it enough.

Great Dragon "He and you young pendragon one day will unite the land of Albion. I mean I guess they will in the sense that they help it be at peace as far as all I know?

Gaius: I will not choose between them (Merlin and Uther)

Great Dragon: Then turn a blind eye. That is afterall your talent.

OOF okay more about Gaius letting the purge happen and siding with Uther. I speculated in the last post about why he might have done this. But still this is REALLY not a good look. And I don't think that reason can be all of it? Was he scared? Was he really that dedicated to Uther? Possibly because Uther united the kingdom and the mess it was in? Or my merlin rewatch discord (this rewatch is seperate from that) is right besides the jokes and Utherus is real. Did he stay behind to try to protect Alice (As she later says) I mean the only time we see him helping sorcerers is with Merlin and Alice. (And in his own twisted reasoning Morgana) He tends to keep their magic a secret at times (Like with Gilli) But doesn't really go out of his way to help them.

The dragon interestingly does not mention magic returning to Albion but Gaius does assure Merlin that one day his gifts will be reconized. So apparently he is all alright with magic coming back eventually. So he cannot have been overly invested in it being destroyed. Even if he does fear it some like I theorized. It was to be one of the other reasons. Personally my bet is it's a mix of a lot of them. People tend to be complicated and it was a HUGE decision Gaius made. It makes sense to me he had a lot of reasons.

WHOA hold up! Gaius has only been in the court of Camelot since around Arthurs's birth? I mean judging by other conversations I assumed it was a lot longer. AND HE WAS CLOSLY INVOLVED IN MAKING IT HAPPEN? Why did Uther trust him so much, Why did Uther not turn on him? This could be another reason he went along with the purge for the most part. Freaking out about Uther blaming and executing him? Liking his new gig? So he became court physician around the birth of arthur... Events he helped make happen. I mean it could help explain Uther's hot and cold attitude to Gaius. Gaius helped him get a son. But that son cost him his wife, Gaius blamed magic and went along with him to try to destroy it? Also did Gaius become a "Legend, and THE VERY BEST" viewed physician during those 20 years? I have a suspicion he was before hand and Uther was like I can't do anything to get a baby don't we have that legendary physician somewhere in the kingdom? Then just up and fired the physician he had or something. (I'm assuming he already had one partly out of basic logic and party because it would explain why Gaius was not ALREADY court Physician if he was so good.) BUT this all assumes that Gaius was already so renowned that Also could have happened AFTR becoming court physician. If it was before it could also explain why uther did not just off him. He is the BEST Legendary. That would be some status to have him.

Arnica being prescribed for an old battle wound on the shouldor that gives a lot of pain makes sence. It's been used for centuries as a pain remedy. HELL you can get Arnica Gell today to help with a variety of issues. (Try rubbing it on the belly if you get period cramps.) Arnica also specializes in muscle pain, stiffness, swelling from injuries, and bruising. Its poisonous if ingested but rubbed on the body that stuff is a miracle.

I forgot to mention this earlier BUT WHO THE FUCK let a litteral child attend his parent's death by burning? Was he made to by someone? was there simply no one to stop him? AND HE JUMPED INTO THE FIRE TO SAVE THEM WTF

Edwin: with your death magic will return to camalot.

UH how does he figure? Even assuming no one ever finds out he used magic to kill Uther. Is he just gonna slowly bring it back? What is his game plan? I mean he has to know it's gonna hurt his credibility when Morgana's dreams return. (And another thing I will go into later) Is he just gonna enchant Arthur or...? If he has that kind of power why did he not use it before?

Gaius: I will not allow you to kill Uther

Edwin: You've never had a problem letting people die before

Gaius: Your parents where practicing dark magic, just like you

Ok so in this case they were practicing dark magic. But it could not have been in every case. I do like a lot of Aspects of Gaius's relationship with Merlin but MAAAAN

Okay Man Edwin you really did not think this through! If you could cure it once you would be expected to cure it again. And you are not even hiding so you are hard to find. You are in your freaking room. You would be expected to cure it! So how the hell was magic going to come back. Were you just planing to say "Sorry I cannot cure it this time?"

HEY! first time a baddie does the "join me Merlin" thing. Also this was his plan? Take the kingdom by force, possibly with Merlin. That would not have gone over well or worked well. Unless he was planning top just dominate and rule through Arthur? But if he had that kinda power why did he have to go though all this? I really don't think this guy has thought through his long term plan.

Okay so Elanthia is the name of the world in a text based computer game about dragons... Melanthia means "black flower" in greek. So not much behind the name here. Also it's interesting they can be enchanted to enter the brain and feed on it until they devour the soul. This implies the Soul kinda lives in the brain in the Merlin word.

Uther (looking sad) "There is nothing wrong with my strength. Do you remember them? His parents?

Gaius: I remember them all Sire.

Uther: Gaius, Once again you've saved my life. You've always served me well. And I know there are things that I've asked you to do, which you've found difficult

Gaius: You've always done what you believed to be right.

Uther: I was not right to betray you. I'm sorry. From now on I will remember, that in the fight against magic, you are the one person I can trust

Interstingly this implies Uther is kind of haunted by the people he has killed but possibly not enough to remember faces. (or he could just be asking if Gaius remembers them too) this is futher evidenced by the mandrake later using images of people he killed to torment him. Its an interesting detail that humanises him a TINY bit despite him being just a horrible horrible person. Also what did he ask Gaius to do? Everyone else talks about Gaius standing by, is that what he refers to? Or did he ask Gaius to be an active part in finding magic users? Gosh I hope not. This scene also shows that Gaius is in fact haunted by what happened as he remembers all the faces. The line he uses to reassure Uther is actually one Merlin uses on Arthur. The difference is what Arthur believes to be right is WAY better than what Uther believes to be right. Also Uther will only remember this until next season. Another difference between him and Arthur.

Uther: But hencforth you are a free man of camalot In feudalism, a free man is someone not nobility but higher in status than a serf. In traditional feudalism Sefdom was the state of most peasants they were given a plot of land but in exchange for having it were required to work it for the lord and give up a portion of what they made. It was basically a form of indentured servitude. CLEARLY that is not happening here, and prior to becoming this Gaius was still allowed to just leave. So we need to look beyond that! In England it later came to mean a man possessing the full privileges and immunities of a place which admission was usually by birth. HOWEVER Gaius later mentions growing up in Camalot. My guess is, in the Merlin World, this means Gaius is now higher in rank than most commoners and lower than a noble. He might have more social rights and protections or have to pay no taxes for example. (taxes are mentioned later in Merlin so seemed a good example)

[wilderness-of-thoughts]

Before

"I'm glad I caught you at least at home, what happened to your phone?" Ijichi was holding a cup of coffee in his hand, sitting on your couch.

"Um..." Flashbacks of Gojo blowing it up using the energy ball "it fell into my toilet as I pissing" you managed a genuine smile of embarrassment. Ijichi looked at you for a moment and then sighed with resignation.

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me..." With that he put an old model phone on the table top. "It doesn't have a camera or games, it's really an antique, but it works. Call me if you need a replacement."You smiled sincerely now. You saw that he was doing better, the bags under his eyes were a bit smaller and he had probably gained a bit of weight."You know, I've had chickenpox before and I shouldn't have..."

Bite.

"Mmmmmmm!" You squealed as you felt the tiny teeth on the back of your neck. If only your coworker knew that you had your narcissistic boss on your back at that moment. "I'll be fine! Thanks for your concern!"

"I'm not the only one worried, Gojo doesn't call back, he only replies to some text messages sometimes. He doesn't send stupid memes to anyone and he doesn't poison anyone's ass..."

"Ohhh~ so you miss him?"

"Like a cold," he joked. He really felt better since he started joking. It was clear that Gojo's entire entourage was only benefiting from such a break.

"Don't worry, when he recovers you'll be up to your noses in him again." You assured, taking a sip of tea from your cup.

"I dare not doubt that." He placed his hand on your knee in a friendly gesture. Bite. Gojo have mercy! "Mr. Nanami told me recently that you borrowed half the archive library."

"Not half, maybe a third." You pursed your lips, pretending to pout. You arched your arm as if you wanted to scratch your back, even though in reality you were petting a little jealous boy. "Actually, can I have a question?"

"If I can help you..."

It's worth a try, after all your friend had more knowledge than you might think. You took a deep breath.

"Let's hypothetically... One of the jujutsu sorcerers... getting tiny..."

"You mean getting younger?"

"No... shrinking." Ijichi frowned, trying to understand you.

"Are we still talking about a hypothetical scenario?"

"Yup! Purely theoretical, hypothetical, not like something like that would even happen!" You laughed nervously. Bite.

"So let's take Itadori, he shrinks. What about his powers?" Ijichi, fucking marry me! BITE!

"YES!" You squealed in pain, good thing Ijichi took it as enthusiasm.

"Hmm... That could be a problem. Even with his powers, he would be in great danger in this form. An easier target." You saw Ijichi already activating his gray cells.

"Exactly! That's why it needs to be returned to normal growth, the sooner the better!"

Ijichi looked at you perhaps too long and too suspiciously, took his hand away and held it out. his notebook of service.

"Where did this hypothetical scene with Itadori take place?"

"On a mission in .... Old house. He defeated all the curses but suddenly shrunk. He doesn't know why. There's nothing on the spot that would indicate it was done with curse magic, and distance spells are out of the question." Gojo doesn't quite understand . It's not like you were revealing his secrets, but you were giving some pretty important details. And Ijichi didn't even question this game of hypothetical scenarios. He got involved in them and didn't ask uncomfortable questions.

Ijichi thought for a moment, breathing deeply while you waited for him.

"I would check if this old house had a Guardian Spirit"

"What do you mean?"

"Ayakashi..." You frowned. It wasn't like you'd never heard the name before - mostly in games - but you didn't expect to hear it now. "Before the first possessors of cursed energy appeared, nature itself got rid of the excess curses. They were food for some Ayakashi. People did not see it, but the areas where there was peace. Plants bore fruit and there weren't many cataclysms, they got shrines. Ayakashi that fed on human curses got names, shrines and people started to worship them." Ijichi explained patiently with a slight hint of nostalgia in his voice. "Then the first jujutsu sorcerers appeared, the human species naturally evolved for this purpose and Ayakashi were no longer needed as much. .... Especially since the first weapons against curses were created from their bodies."

"The first weapons..."

"That's what the scrolls I dug up say. Whether it's true or not, I don't know. History is like whore. Everyone has their own opinion about it, but no one knows what it's really like."

"Heh.... Right. So there's a chance that... Ayakashi could have shrunked Go-I mean Itadori?"

"Theoretically yes. If it survived the purge that its ancestors made to obtain a large amount of weapons. Nowadays, Ayakashi are almost a dying species..."

It could make sense, Gojo destroyed an old temple where Ayakashi could live, and in revenge he cast a spell on him....

"Do you know how to pull off this.... Hypothetical spell?"

"Only a hypothetical Ayakashi knows that."

Damn.

"Do you know how to get this theoretical Ayakashi to cooperate?"

"he will want something, it's hard to say what."

You talked to Ijichi for a while before he left, he said it was Meeting with an old acquaintance but he blushed sweetly.

Determination returned.

"Gojo, we're going to the Old Temple!"

"I told you there's nothing there..."

"We're going there together."

"Date?"

"Over my dead body"

"It can be arranged"

Theoretically.

Next

[pagesandpothos]

Sorcery and Small Magics by Maiga Doocy

Official Blurb:

Desperate to undo the curse binding them to each other, an impulsive sorcerer and his curmudgeonly rival venture deep into a magical forest in search of a counterspell—only to discover that magic might not be the only thing pulling them together. Leovander Loveage is a master of small magics. He can summon butterflies with a song, or turn someone’s hair pink by snapping his fingers. Such minor charms don’t earn him much admiration from other sorcerers (or his father), but anything more elaborate always blows up in his face. Which is why Leo vowed years ago to never again write powerful magic. That is, until a mix-up involving a forbidden spell binds Leo to obey the commands of his longtime nemesis, Sebastian Grimm. Grimm is Leo’s complete opposite—respected, exceptionally talented, and an absolutely insufferable curmudgeon. The only thing they agree on is that getting caught using forbidden magic would mean the end of their careers. They need a counterspell, and fast. But Grimm casts spells, he doesn’t undo them, and Leo doesn’t mess with powerful magic. Chasing rumors of a powerful sorcerer with a knack for undoing curses, Leo and Grimm enter the Unquiet Wood, a forest infested with murderous monsters and dangerous outlaws alike. To dissolve the curse, they’ll have to uncover the true depths of Leo’s magic, set aside their long-standing rivalry, and—much to their horror—work together. Even as an odd spark of attraction flares between them.

My Thoughts:

Sorcery and Small Magics might be my absolute favorite read of the year! I absolutely devoured this book and loved everything about it.

First, the worldbuilding and magic system are both creative and really well done. Locations include a prestigious magic school, a rural countryside filled with people who use magic to make simple livings, and a dangerous forest filled with terrifying monsters. All of these settings are lush and described well. I felt fully immersed in this world while reading! The magic system is also unique and ended up being one of my favorite parts of the story. Sorcerers are divided into either Scrivers (people who can write spells) or Casters (who cast spells). This division was inventive and it added a lot to the story. There's also some music-based magic that plays a really cool role in the story.

The characters are also really great. At the start of the story, Leo is a loveable screwup who lacks confidence in his magic abilities. He's from a wealthy and esteemed family that has high expectations for him. Sebastian, on the other hand, is from a working-class family and is an excellent student and spellcaster who takes his abilities (and most things) very seriously.

Their opposite personalities have caused conflict between the two at school and they start the story as rivals. A spell-gone-wrong demands that the two work together and their story truly begins to develop here.

I adored their dynamic from start to finish. Their dynamic in the first half of the book reminded me of the Harry/Draco fanfiction I read as a teenager. Their evolution in the second half was even more interesting and led to a lot of depth and complexity in their relationship.

I will caution that this is a true slow burn! So don't go in expecting feelings to be fully realized or spicy scenes to happen. Sorcery and Small Magics lays the groundwork for what should become a really amazing relationship in later books but there are a lot of misconceptions to overcome and growth that has to happen first. This series feels like it could finally be the amazing queer slow-burn love story that so many queer fans in so many fandoms have longed for. I, for one, am fully on board this ship and I'm ridiculously excited to see where it goes!

Along with the relationship growth, both Leo and Grimm have great character moments. Both young men are more complicated than they seem and I loved slowly discovering more about them.

In addition, there's also a whole cast of supporting characters that I enjoyed and look forward to seeing more of in future books. Some interesting political and moral issues are also set up.

I can't recommend Sorcery and Small Magics enough. I enjoyed reading this immensely and I can not wait for the sequel. If future books in this series match the quality of this book, I think this could easily become my new favorite series!

Honestly, I need everyone on Tumblr to read this and start making fan art and writing fanfiction because it's going to be a long wait for book #2 and I need more of this world and Grimm/Leo!

My Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Tropes/Tags: Achillean, high fantasy, romantasy, slow burn, rivals to allies to ???, magic, forced proximity. You can see a trope graphic from the author here!

Content Warnings: If you have emetophobia there are a few scenes where a character vomits due to a curse or other magical influence.

If you liked this I think you will like Sorcery and Small Magics: The Last Binding series by Freya Marske, The Simon Snow series by Rainbow Rowell, anyone who has ever enjoyed Harry/Draco fanfiction, anyone who has ever wanted a good queer slow-burn romance

Other Notes: Maiga Doocy posted some beautiful art of Leo and Sebastian on her Instagram!

Links: Storygraph | GoodReads | MaigaDoocy.com

Sorcery and Small Magics will be released on October 15, 2024, and is available for pre-order!

I received an advanced copy of this book for free thanks to NetGalley and Orbit. The above are my honest feelings on the provided book.

[aita-blorbos]

The other side to "AITA for double-crossing a man who blindly conquered half a continent?"

AITA for annexing half a continent by accident?

Apologies in advance if this is a confusing read. There's a lot of princes and countries involved. I (25M) am the heir to a dutchy... or at least I used to be, before I got framed for treason. But more on that later. Our country was accused of murdering the Prince of another country, which we had no part in. It was likely an accident, as I heard he was traveling in the desert when it happened, but I don't see why they would blame us. Anyways, most of the army went to the front lines, including my father. That left our borders vulnerable. In a very unexpected twist of events, the rather peaceful king of yet another country allowed his sons to cross over and pillage. They kidnapped a childhood friend of mine and almost killed her retainer. As soon as I heard about the attack I sprang into action, rushing to her castle and finding I was too late. Her retainer pointed us in the right direction, and we set off to rescue her.

It took a bit, and we ended up halfway into the country before we found my friend. We also found the prince of the country that declared war on us. It turns out he and his aunt had fled there to avoid the war, and the goons blackmailed his aunt into fighting for them. They're free now, don't worry! The aunt is actually married to my friend now, and they've got twins.

Anyways, the youngest prince of the country we were in asked us if we could help convince his father to stand down. It was too late, though-- his advisor mortally wounded him. Thankfully my wife was around to nullify the sorcerer's magic, but we couldn't save the king. We annexed the country under the instruction of the crown and I was stationed near our border.

(Side note, but it was during this campaign that I met my wife. I love her and miss her so much. She went missing a while ago and left our son behind. She is soft and fluffy and I love her. If you know a woman with wonderful lavender hair and eyes, the sweetest voice known to man, and the temperament of an angel, please tell me, for I wish to see her again.)

It didn't end there. The country to the north, home of my great friend E (M25), lost their king suddenly. Their prince took charge soon after. He saw us being stationed near their border as a threat. I can't say I blame him there. What I blame him for is imprisoning E when E tried to reason with him. I set out to rescue E and, well, in the process of doing so, we annexed some of that country too. E was infuriated when we rescued him. We made a deal with him and the prince that we would withdraw after a year of rebuilding.

It took about six months for the prince to snap. He sent E after me, and while I managed to get E to stand down, the prince accused E of treason and had him killed. From there on, we didn't have a choice. The only thing we could do was keep fighting. In the end, the whole country was annexed.

I never did find out how that ended up. See, soon after that incident, I received word that our crown prince was killed and the crime was pinned on my father and I. How anyone believed this, I don't know, as my father and the prince were the best of friends. He would never betray him like that! And how was I supposed to plot against him when I was busy otherwise? We were offered sanctuary in yet another country, and we are staying here until our names are cleared. Sorry if this seems dour in tone. I've been depressed lately with my father and I being framed and my wife having disappeared (and maybe been kidnapped). I also blame myself for E's death. Well? AITA? I sure didn't mean for things to end up like this. Edit: Well, I think things might be getting better! I got a letter from one of the dukes back home that he's pardoning me. He's going to set up a welcome for us and everything! I really want to get this whole mess with me and my father cleared up. Maybe he'll even help me find my wife! I really miss her :(

[adhd-merlin]

merlin S1 rewatch: episode 6

it’s been a hot minute! today’s commentary is about episode 1x06, A Remedy to Cure All Ills. which I re-watched more than a month ago actually, but I’ve been busy.

just some random comments and thoughts (as usual), and not an actual review or analysis.

I think this episode is extremely underrated – I loved it the first time I watched it, and I still thoroughly enjoyed it on my rewatch. yes, it’s kind of a filler episode with a very traditional Villain of the Week format – but it's a great villain.

Julian Rhind-Tutt’s performance as Edwin is great and I love a suave, smooth-talking, scheming villain as much as the next person. The way he manipulates people, never suggesting anything outright but playing on people’s fears and biases, only saying just enough to make them reach the conclusion he wants. Something very Richard III about it. Very Iago.

EDWIN: “No… I shan’t say”

Another thing I love about this episode is the rare (unique?) instance of Merlin showing his magic to another sorcerer whom he isn't suspicious of (the audience knows Edwin is the Bad Guy, of course, but at this point Merlin doesn't).

I can’t think of another moment like this in the series. Freya didn’t actually have magic. There is Gilli, but when Merlin reveals his magic to him he already knows of the boy's intention to kill Uther, and it is a last attempt to stop Gilli from committing regicide without putting him in harm’s way. Merlin's relationship with Mordred and the Druids was always complicated by prophecies and by his role as Emrys.

But there’s none of that here. Edwin tells Merlin that magic can be used for good, and that it can be ENJOYED! which is all Merlin ever wanted to hear. And it’s a bit heartbreaking to see the hope on Merlin's face, knowing all that is going to happen later in the series.

I also loved the previous interaction between Merlin and Edwin:

“It can’t explain love”!! He’s a romantic. He loves love 🥺🥺🥺

I think the writers lost sight of Edwin’s motive a bit by the time they got to the ending. He’s not content with just killing Uther, he also wants to… rule the kingdom? And he tells Merlin they can do it together? (a concept revisited in the Cornelius Sigan episode). I don't think it works well.

I think Edwin’s final evil speech would have been way more impactful if he had tried to appeal to Merlin’s empathetic side, instead of his non-existent thirst for power, and reminded him of all the suffering Uther caused and why he deserved to die. I guess that would be a moral dilemma that deserves more than a few minutes of screen time to be resolved satisfactorily, and we’re already at the end of the episode at this point.

The series does dwell on it in To Kill the King, to be fair, but I think the “why not just let Uther die?” dilemma could have been presented before then. (Merlin's momentarily hesitation at healing Uther at the end is more to do with his fear of being seen using magic by Uther than by an actual reluctance to save the king.)

Anyway. I still think this is a very good episode overall, even with its relatively weak ending.

Other random thoughts:

The random-ass reference to alchemy. Something that wasn’t elaborated on, nor ever mentioned again (??) Missed opportunity imo.

Gaius is made "a free man of Camelot", whatever that means. (Does it mean that he, like Merlin, is not from Camelot? Or is it some kind of special privilege? We don’t know. I think maybe in Love at the Time of Dragons Gaius mentions something about he and Alice coming to Camelot but I can’t remember and I can’t be bothered to check now)

Some excellent display of brotherly concern from Arthur when Morgana falls sick. He's the one pushing for Uther to call for Edwin. We love to see it

Merlin and Gaius all but call each other father and son. DON’T TOUCH ME.

Gaius was 100% ready to let Uther die if it meant saving Merlin’s life. btw.

Gaius and Uther. WHAT ARE THEY

All the heavy hints at Gaius’s acting as a Category Traitor in the Great Purge + the only instance of Gaius talking to Kilgharrah (!!!) I am obsessed with it

The paralles between Uther & Gaius and Arthur & Merlin. I feel absolutely normal about it

“Now, open your eyes, My Lord. I want my face to be the last face you ever see.” -> I don’t care if it’s cliched, this line fucks

MERLIN CLAIMS ANOTHER VICTIM, AT LAST!! I was starting to worry but finally my baby is back to killing people :)

[closetsof-backlogged-dreams]

what are ur feelings on the execution of the magic reveal??

ok so i have manymanyMANY feelings on in which ill try to wrap up as cleanly as possible so lets just get into it

the way they like speedran the magic reveal??

to paint you a picture: i was super impatient when i first started the series lmao, and so i had watched maybe 4-5 episodes of the first season when i googled "when does arthur find out about merlin's magic"💀💀 i ended up getting the wrong answer because im stupid as shit so i was just surprised as everyone else when it ACTUALLY happened, but thats besides the point.

the point? this was a SUPER important plot point. everyone was waiting on the edge of their seat, every single episode, for merlin to finally pop arthur's bubble and reveal his magic. but five seasons passed, and we didn't get it until the last episode?? are you kidding me?? and because we only got it on the last episode, where arthur was dying, arthur was robbed of any true explanations or declarations or apologies like he—we—deserved. instead, arthur's reaction to it was brief and just not enough. he was disbelieving, then shocked, then angry, then sad, then accepting, all within what, like a day and a half? forty minutes of screen time? im sorry, after spending around 46 hours watching this series and waiting for the magic reveal, that just doesn't cut it.

2. we have to admit, the magic reveal in the last episode felt so NATURAL

sometimes i really struggle to hate the magic reveal, because no one can deny how perfectly everything fell into place. he got trapped in the cave, his father spoke to him, he escaped the cave and transformed himself into that old guy, he single-handedly wiped out the Saxons, arthur was struck, merlin found him and carried him away from the battlefield, merlin turns back into merlin, and then the fucking "I defeated the Saxons. The dragon, and yet— and yet I knew it was Mordred that I must stop." / "The person who defeated them was the sorcerer." / "It was me." / "Don't be ridiculous, Merlin. This is stupid. Wh—why would you say that?" / "I'm—I'm a sorcerer. I have magic. And I use it for you, Arthur. Only for you." (Your welcome for that, day after Christmas<3)

like, you CANNOT TELL ME that doesn't flow perfectly!! that everything that happened in that episode didn't flow perfectly!! the magic reveal was always going to be impossibly difficult to get right, but they got it right in the finale!! that is one thing i will always give the writers—I may have not liked the circumstances of the magic reveal, but the magic reveal itself was beautifully executed.

3. too little, too late

i read an article recently that really pointed this out, and while i disagree with most of what they said in the article, i agree with one thing: the ending was so, so unsatisfying. the magic reveal was so, so unsatisfying. what was the point of him even revealing his magic? the magic reveal was great, sure, but nothing actually came out of it. oh, for the next 24-48 hours of life, arthur can accept him!! but that's it.

there's the implication that gwen will legalize magic after the series, but merlin and gwen don't even get a final scene together! all in all, the magic reveal just wasn't enough. we ended so much more time for arthur to sort out his feelings, for there to be good days and bad days, to watch them relearn trust and love again. we deserved that kind of ending. we deserved the magic reveal to be in, imo, The Death Song of Uther Pendragon, or s5e3. give them an entire season to get through everything. you can still kill arthur!! but let them have that animosity. if anything, have them start out those last two battles on bad terms. let the travel to the lake be them relearning trust and love. let that be the emotional baggage they have to unpack in the finale.

just overall, do anything except what you actually did lmao.

alright!! i think those are the main three points? i think that wrapped everything up pretty nicely, so ty sm for the ask!! these are always the highlight of my month lol.

[phantoms-lair]

Batman Exalted Thing

Because thought experiments never stay thought experiments

~~~

"Thought you'd be up on the roof, Commish?"

Gordon turned to Bullock, "Why?"

"Signals up. Usually mean you want to talk to Bats."

Gordon rolled his eyes. Some rookie with stars in his eyes probably wanted to see the local vigilantes. He sighed and made his way up the stairs.

It wasn't a rookie he found, but a woman he knew he'd never seen before. She turn and looked at him and suddenly he felt like his very soul was being turned inside out and examined before everything snapped back to normal.

"You felt that." she sounded surprised. "Oh, I do hope he hasn't factored you into his plan."

"What was that? Who are you?"

"You may call me Quill." The woman nodded

"But that's not your name." he guessed.

She looked bitter. "I had to destroy my name to prevent magical tracking. Quill will have to do., for both of us."

"Tracking from who?" Of course Batman had appeared without notice. His full attention was on Quill.

"Ketchup Carjack." She answered succinctly.

Neither man responded for a moment. "Who?" Jim finally asked for clarification.

"It's not his real name, just similar sounding words. But he's one of those 'I demand respect' types, so I give him none on principal." Her cool façade fell as angered colored her tone. It was clear to see it wasn't just a matter of principle, she despised whoever she was talking about.

She turned her gaze to Batman. He had a notorious poker face, but years of knowing him let Jim see his discomfort as the woman's glanced at him and knew batman was feeling the same inside out feeling he had.

"You're a meta." Batman observed.

"I am something entirely different. More magical than meta. And I will explain more later, but lets get to the meat of this meeting, shall we? Ketchup is going to try to empower you and your family of vigilantes to create a permanent foothold between your world and his so he can conquer it and I'd rather like to stop him as I hate his guts and everything he stands for."

"So he's going to offer us power and we have to refuse." There was a lot in that statement that needed unpacking, but that seemed the simplest thing.

"No. He's not offering. He's going to manipulate your fates to give you power, then offer to teach you how to use it, make you a political power and through that become the true ruler behind the throne." Quill was practically growling. "And you can stop him from empowering us?" Batman pressed.

"Er, no. My plan kind of relies on you being powered up." Quill admitted awkwardly. "Look, if you can make your own fates read-only so he can't mess with them, great. That's a win condition and I can go back to hiding in the underworld until he tries again. If not, don't knock my plan of you don't have one of your own."

"You're defensive. Frightened." Batman observed.

"Of course I'm frightened!" Quill snapped. "I lost everything because I didn't know how to stop it! And now I'm trying to stop this from happening ever again. But I am one person with powers I don't really understand and even if I did they are NOT made for this kind of thing. My exigence is based around stories. And the only story I've found that can block Ketchup's world off from the multiverse is of a ritual called the Seal of Eight Divinities, which I couldn't do myself even if I was a sorcerer, which I'm not. And the only people with power that Ketchup can't track are the fair folk, the demons, and the undead, all of whom want to destroy or at least conquer reality, so my only option for help to power this is letting the monster who destroyed my life mess with other peoples." Batman sat on the structure of the bat signal next her her, his body language changed to the one he used dealing with scared children. And seeing the crying woman in front of them, Jim felt that was a more accurate reading of her that the cool and collected persona she'd first tried to project.

"This isn't the first time he's tried this, is it?" Batman said in a gentle voice.

"He tried it the other way first. When our worlds got close he grabbed a bunch of us and tried to force us to Exalt. That's, um, that the word for this power. He can't manipulate the fates of other worlds as easily. So he brought us to his to make it happen naturally. But to exalt in his world you have to prove yourself to the gods and that's dangerous and..." She gulped. "He lied. All he does is lie. He told us our world was going to be destroyed, but would be spared if we proved out worth as representatives. The others died, but for some reason I was chosen. My power was stories and when I looked at him, I saw his." "I saw his lies. Our world was never in danger, his was. He was the leader of a group of shadow manipulators who controlled fate through magic and deceit. But his very manipulations had brought their world to the brink of collapse. His work had disrupted the protectors because they were threats to his rule, and now the enemies of existence were at his gate. But he couldn't even acknowledge it to himself! As far as he was concerned if things were failing under his leadership, then they were always destined to fail and nothing could fix them. So he just had to find a new world."

"But when realities touch, it's brief. It wouldn't be enough for him to move his whole operation unless a bridge was formed. Something that joined the two worlds, say a mortal from one world empowered by the other. I knew I had to stop him so I broke my story. I erased all of it from before he caught me. So there was nothing to tie me to my original world. Not even memories." She sounded so lost, but in a way she was. So lost she didn't even have a concept of home.

"Why come to us? Why not try to contact the Justice League directly?" Batman inquired. "This may be starting on Gotham, but it sounds like it would be a global problem." "Three reasons." Quill explained. "The first is that Ketchup has narrowed his focus down to Gotham and I don't want to give him ideas about expanding. The second is as far as I know, Ketchup does not know I'm here, nor that I'm actively plotting against him. Outside help being brought in before he's even made a move will let him know something is up and may cause him to escalate or be harder to pin down. And the final and main reason-" Quill shuddered. "Cash and Murder Games on Superman."

Jim and Batman waited for further explanation, but when none seemed coming a prod was necessary.

"Is that some sort of gladiatorial colosseum?" Jima asked. "It's a ...spell is the wrong word but get the point across without going into semantics. It's one of Ketchups favorites and allows him to define the relationship between two people."

"Such as defining himself as 'beloved master' and Superman as 'devoted servant'." Batman deduced.

"Exactly! And that's far from the only mind manipulation tool in his box. They can be resisted but given Superman's specific vulnerability to magic-" Quill looked deeply uncomfortable.

"How much of the Justice League have you looked at thee way you looked at the Commissioner and myself?" Batman inquired.

His tone wasn't accusing, but Quill flinched. "A lot. Your world depends on knowing who was safe to trust, And as with Superman, not just in terms of morality. I am well into desperate times." She gave a self depreciating laugh then took a breath.

"Justice League Dark I would trust to got over the ritual to see if it needs adjustment to this world, but the magics they use would be incompatible with casting it. On the ground, if it were called for, my first choice would be Wonder Woman. Shazam as a last resort. Dr. Fate...would be a potent ally, but I don't think I'd be able to work with him personally. But then again I'm not sure what use I am on the ground either."

"Why is Shazam a last resort?" Wonder Woman made sense, and the issue with Dr. Fate seemed to be a matter of clashing personalities, but Shazam being a last resort seemed...odd.

"He has his own things he's dealing with, As a fiercely independent person, he doesn't want or need help, but I'm loathe to put another burden on his shoulders."

"Fiercely independent?" Batman raised an eyebrow.

"Can you name one times he's asked for help instead of volunteered it?" Quill challenged. "Also you might want to talk to him about workshopping a new name. Or not. It's his...I shouldn't have said anything." She pulled out several file folders. "Here, this is all the relevant information on Ketchup and different Exaltations. And the ritual. Um, I don't have a phone or anything, but I we can set a meeting time if you have any questions."

Batman pulled a small phone from his belt. "This is a burner. We can use it to contact you or vice versa. Do you have a place to stay?" "It's not hard to hide in Gotham, at least not with Ketchup having trouble with fate."

"Not back to the underworld?"

"Not if I can help it. But still better than Hell."

Batman shared a quick glance with Jim. If half of what Quill was saying was true, this woman likely had severe PTSD. They'd need to look into getting her help after the crisis was over.

"I'll have Justice League Dark look over the ritual. We'll go from there."

[siriannatan]

How to Make An Unlikely Friendship - Witch!Scott and Empires!Shelby

Just a funny little Idea that suddenly hit me :}

AO3

Evil Sausage turned out to not be as nice as Shelby thought. And she couldn't stop him herself. And no one could find Sausage. He would know what to do. Shelby was a witch and not a mage or a sorcerer or a wizard. Evil Wizards were a bit beyond her capabilities. She would have to find Sausage. The normal, good one who could contact his goddess.

She did have a plan for how to find him. She could not ask witches at the academy or her grandma or even other emperors for advice so... she found a spell to communicate with great witches of other dimensions and even times. Someone considered great by magic itself would without doubt be more than capable of helping her. There was no way it could go wrong.

The ritual was relatively simple. Some ingredients for the chalk she needed were a bit troublesome to get but she managed. And other than that it was just the correct phase of the moon. Prepare the circle and candles and the herbal effigy to burn and she was good to go to invite a Great Witch for a chat. She wasn't sure how exactly that would work, the book she was using did not explain that part, but that probably meant it was not a big deal. The Greatest Storm Witch, as the author was signed, must have known what they were doing. They were the Greatest after all.

And so Shelby went through the ritual. For a second, after she cast the spell, nothing has happened but then there was a whole bunch of smoke. And coughing. "What in the sake of all hells?" Shelby heard a somewhat familiar voice. Scott? She thought. did she end up summoning a Scott from some different dimension? A Great Witch Scott? "Are you playing with magic you should not again, Pris?" the 'Scott' asked.

"I'm not a 'Pris', I'm Shelby, A Great Witch of this area," Shelby introduced herself and cast a small gust to get the smoke away faster. "I'm sorry if I interrupted anything, I can't really control who this spell summons," she added.

This was certainly not the Scott she knew. Not with all the black and dark green and spooky vibes. And was he not breathing or was it her imagination?

"No, no, some rest will not hurt me, others are no challenge anyway. I'm Scott, the necromantic witch, a candidate for the Supreme Witch," Scott introduced himself with a bow and the sass Shelby very much connected to the Scott she knew. "What was that spell even supposed to do? I have a bit of expertise with summoning. And why did you summon me?" he grinned as he dusted off his robes. They were rather nice, nicer than any set of robes Shelby ever had herself. But it made sense he was a candidate for a Supreme Witch. Whatever that was sounded impressive.

So Shelby explained her predicament. And Scott listened, nodding along and not saying anything until she was done.

"Yeah, your friend sounds like the best solution, we have no idea what would happen if I dabbled too much in that. And while I can't get him back, I know someone who can. A demon, friendly one, don't worry, he helped me a lot," Scott finally said and pulled out a thick, bound with dark leather and metal. An impressive book. "Well, he's harmless as long as we're staying safe," he added with a grin.

Scott was not a 'good' kind of witch. Not in the academy's way. He was more of a 'whatever solves the problem without causing too many other problems' kind of witch. Curses. Demons. Necromancy. And one of the participants in a competition for the title of Supreme Witch. Not something that happened in this dimension, sadly. Shelby was sure she'd do great in that.

Summoning Leonard - as the demon was called apparently, took them only a few hours. Scott really knew what he was doing. And it was more than eager to help when Scott offered to 'let him meet Pris again' whatever or whoever this Pris was must have been an impressive person if a demon was interested in them. The demon easily brought Sausage who, without paying any mind to a demon or a necromancer just rushed off to Sanctuary to fight his evil alternate self. 

"He could not see us, I can vanish and Leonard went home," Scott explained before Shelby could even ask. "I suppose I still have a few hours here, the spell, I believe, keeps me here for 24 hours at best," he hummed looking around the foggy swamp. "This place looks... fun."   "The fog's dangerous if you get lost in it, I'm working on getting rid of it," Shelby explained and invited him for tea and cookies. She might as well since she was the one who dragged him to this dimension.

Scott was more than eager for tea and cookies. "I don't remember when someone else booked or baked for me last time... Zombies are rubbish at it," he snickered, offering Shelby an arm.

They spend the rest of Scott's summoning time talking about magic and how limiting the idea of 'good' was. And Shelby learned about Pris. Apparently, she was Scott's self-proclaimed rival and 'fighter of good'. 

"She accused me of wanting to take over the world even, like... Do I look like I want that responsibility?" Scott laughed, he was telling a story of a duel he had with Pris. A duel she requested, lost, and denied Scott's win, demanding an instant rematch like four times in a row. "If she kept away from my magic and apologised for being rude I'd leave her alone, I did it when Joey did," Scott sighed shaking his head.

Another familiar name. And that Joey sounded just as annoying as the local Pirate so Shelby told Scott about her problems with him. And how cool Katherine is. And Scott told her about his best friends Eloise and Cleo, and some other witches he knew. Like the Storm Witch, his dimension's Shelby. Shelby was honestly a bit jealous this Scott had so many witch friends. She never had many friends back in the Academy. She did stay off the topic of local Scott since just mentioning him had her guest looking down.

It was a bit sad when he vanished in a puff of greenish smoke.

[tammulberry]

Shrek's Domain: A Shrek & Jujutsu Kaisen Crossover (Mulberry Conundrum)

On why I did this, I don't even know the answer to that.

SYNOPSIS: Shrek gets kidnapped.

Years of the Yapping™ started in 2022 finished in 2024

RATING: GG for Goodness Gracious WORD COUNT: 1069

Copyright © 2024 by T.A.M. Mulberry

Somebody once told Shrek that he would be left all alone in his swamp. Yeah sure, he ain't the brightest tool in the shed but what exactly was the issue with that? Shrek was living the Far Far Away dream. He had private property, a mud jacuzzi, a limitless supply of slugtastic cuisine and signs that tell people to get off his property.

However, that amazing life of his was gonna be over sooner than he expected. Not because of some short dude compensating for something. Not because of a talking donkey that he wanted off his ass. It wasn't even because of some fairytale creatures that decided to invade his home.

His life was ruined because of two things: a soapy finger and a white haired bean pole with a punchable face.

***

Shrek's eyelids started to flicker as he heard an irritating voice. As he slowly opened his eyes, he saw a strange dude with white hair and a blindfold. Maybe his eyes were used for stew, he thought.

"Heyy! What's up, stinky!" the voice drawled at him as he was still delirious. "Care to hang over with me on the wall of the place that we call home in the dumpster fire of the sea and the stars?"

"What?" As Shrek slowly opened his eyes, he saw rings.

"Care for some onion rings? I heard your species liked those things."

Instinctively, Shrek tried to swing his right arm but alas, he was tied up. He struggled against the rope and the annoying beanpole laughed.

"Haha look, I know you're an orc and all but no way are you gonna get out of those restraints. It's magic."

"First of all, I'm an ogre," said Shrek nonchalantly. "Second of all..."

"WHERE IS MY SWAMP?"

The white haired man gasped dramatically. "The goblin is going to kill me!"

"I'm an OH-GER!" Shrek enunciated. "My name is Shrek!"

"Yay!" The man clapped. "He can talk! Since we're doing introductions now. I'm Satoru Gojo. The strongest sorcerer there is!"

"Where am I?" Shrek asked as he looked around. It was full of strange papers with even stranger markings hanging from every part of the room.

"You, my repulsive green friend, are in the chambers of Jujutsu High School."

"Oh, and spoiler alert," Gojo whispered. "It's far far away from your beloved swamp."

"Then why am I even here?" Shrek asked exasperatedly.

Gojo raised his pointer finger. "That's a very good question! Megumi! Come over here!"

Shrek raised his head up to see another figure walk into the room. He had black spiky hair like a porcupine and looked like he didn't want to be there.

Great, that makes two of them.

"Why don't you tell the troll here about what happened?" Gojo asked the boy with a wide grin, his hand rested on his cheek.

"For the last time, Gojo, how was I supposed to know that he was gonna eat it?" Megumi scoffed at him.

"Wait, eat?" Shrek raised an eyebrow. "Oh, I see. You idiots want to slaughter me for a banquet."

"Absolutely not," Megumi deadpanned. "You're here because you came into contact with one of the most dangerous relics known to man. Do you realize that?"

"I'm an ogre so it probably ain't that threatening if I know nothing about it."

"Do you remember eating anything strange?" said Megumi.

"No, I didn't—" But Shrek's world started to spin around like a whirlpool.

"What's happening?!" Shrek exclaimed and if things couldn't get any worse, the white man was the only thing he could see as he spun.

"See ya later, maneater!" Gojo waved at him.

***

Shrek woke up again in what seemed to be his swamp. Maybe it was just a nightmare, he thought. Relief flooded his system momentarily until he got up and looked at his surroundings.

Everything was trashed. Frantically, he tried to search through all his belongings only to find bones, muck and ruins.

He burst out from his house and saw a man that looked like him. If he was buffer and had facial hair.

"So, you've finally entered my domain," said his doppelgänger with a gravelly voice.

There goes "it was just a dream." This day couldn't get any better but Shrek could care less at this point.

"Why do you have a British accent?" Shrek asked him, perplexed.

"Shut up, ogre." At least he knows he is one. "Believe me, I do not want to be in this situation either."

"Hmm," started Shrek. "That makes you, me and the porcupine boy."

"Silence!" The other Shrek boomed. "Do you know who I am, foul beast?"

"I preferred it when you called me ogre."

"I am Ryomen Sukuna! The King of Curses! I have taken over your your body after you conveniently found my finger in your disgusting premises."

Shrek shuddered and grimaced but he's experienced weirder. "Ohh, so that's what this is about. If the whirlpool was a clue, do I just need to flush you out?"

"No!" Sukuna facepalmed. "I am a walking disaster! A bomb that can easily level cities!"

"Heh, the only bomb that can level cities is the huge load I'm about to drop on the white-haired wizard once I get out."

***

Shrek opened his eyes again. Lo and behold, Satoru Gojo and his apprentice, Megumi observing him.

"Fascinating..." said Megumi. "He's so indifferent to the situation that he managed to keep the Ryomen Sukuna at bay."

"Well!" Gojo raised his arms. "Now that you received a vague explanation as to why you are here... I'm going to offer you an ultimatum?"

"Do your worst."

"Either you become my servant OR I kill you!" Gojo exclaimed with finger guns and Shrek sighed.

"How are you gonna kill me?" Shrek asked as he seemed to be considering that option a lot more.

"We're going to spill your guts and use it as fertilizer for our plants. I'm gonna "Gojo" your eyeballs and — "

"Eh, not a bad way to use my dead body — " Shrek shrugged.

"You're not supposed to be so calm about this!" Megumi yelled.

"Whoa, chill, Megumi," said Gojo nonchalantly as he put a hand on his shoulder. "Be as indifferent as our squonk friend here."

Gojo turned to Shrek and removed his blindfold, revealing sparkling blue eyes.

"So what's it gonna be, ogre?"

"Your eyeballs would look better than mine in a cocktail."

END.

[wildskissed]

in light of it being mother's day, are eve and gale parents?? if so, what kind of parents are they?? what are their kids like??

Awwww, thank you, Nonnie, I love this. Also I can't help but wonder if you're someone I talk to on Discord who knows about my Eve & Gale Sims, but I digress...

So, I know the galemancers are divided on this issue, but no matter. Nowhere in game does it actually give us concretely whether or not Gale wants kids, but that's on purpose. We're left to draw our own conclusions because it's that kind of game, and so this man who says he isn't sure he's father material, and wants to come back to this after the tadpoles, could easily change his mind or stick to this.

Personally, I have always headcanoned that the Netherese orb messed his entire body up. Gale thinks on top of all of this that he is infertile, so he doesn't want a lover to get their hopes up (actually I have an unpublished one-shot in the works about this too). Because of this, when I made Eve & Gale as Sims, I messed with their fertility to make it low because Eve is an elf and her fertility is low by default. I also have them on high autonomy, so they choose to do a LOT of stuff on their own--I like my Sims chaotic--and Eve being a 'family oriented' Sim, kept getting sad moodlets every single time she took a pregnancy test and it was negative. Then Gale, in true Gale fashion, actually, would get his own sad moodlets because his wife was sad, and started on his own, offering to try for a baby after they'd discuss her sad mood. Yay for high autonomy chaos.

Now, it did make me think about Eve and Gale post!Baldur's Gate, and how I still very much believe that there's a nagging in the back of his head that he can't have kids due to his own folly in the first place, and I absolutely see Morena and Tara bugging them about kids. I think that would put him in probably a negative head space because it's an expected thing and he can't even 'do that properly'. Eve also would love to have kids, but she's okay without them too, so I kind of see them foregoing birth control because neither of them actually thinks that it's going to happen, but they don't want to close the door on it completely. Eve's over 200, Gale's been through so much, and so they have comfortably settled in Waterdeep, and have decided to leave it in Fate's hands. Gale's a professor, Eve owns a flower shop in the city, they have her pegasi to take of at the edge of the city in their own little home away from home cabin in the forest, and they love their lives.

In comes a miracle pregnancy as you will to catch them off guard though.

Why? Because I do see them being parents, and I do feel like they'd be great parents, and I do think they would be happy about it, but also stressed. They put themselves into this mindset, and were just so convinced it wasn't a thing, and then suddenly Eve's pregnant, and they have a whole year (look, elven pregnancies are long but no one wants to agree on the exact length) to get used to the idea, and by the time Serenity comes into the picture they're just elated. She's all fiery red hair like her mother, and deep brown eyes like her father, and absolutely will be a sorcerer that prolly summons things just like her parents--a little bit of payback for what they put their own parents through as kids.

They are both doting parents, and I see Gale sometimes bringing Serenity to work in a carrier on his front, and I see Eve doing the same at the shop. The two teach her magic, and they love her to pieces, and given that elves don't have many kids because their fertility gets lower with every kid, and because I think Gale has low fertility too, I do think she's probably their only kid, but maybe they could have a son like 6 or 7 years later. I just think Serenity would be their pride and joy, and that they'd feel pleasantly surprised and rewarded that they get to experience yet another adventure together. Eve is probably the stricter parent, but I think they'd have a little know-it-all with manners and proper etiquette. Gale is absolutely a girl!dad so just let me have this, okay??

Also, the pregnancy in Sims caught me off guard too but look at this cutie!:

Serenity Dekarios in all her glory

[guiltycorp]

jjk 236 manga spoilers !!! -

Extremely funny how the high school reunion party followed by Gojo's body reveal was framed in that way for the sole reason that this shocking resolution would have been boring as fuck if done straightforwardly hahaha... Honestly i still believe in the potential of Gojo turning into a cursed spirit (because that obvious aspect of the world-building hasn't been delivered on WHATSOEVER yet) or the next 6 eyes somehow being immediately ready to throw down, but i no longer believe that any of it will be written well.

A thing that has been bothering me for a while due to spending too much time on twitter is how shonen bros are very keen on praising the technical aspect of the magic system in jjk, how the fights are so good they balance out the lack of emotional weight. ...but was any of the fighting actually good on that technical shonen level? There are a lot of implications about how various Heian era sorcerers came up with techniques and items that are used today but none of it has any real elegance since every new technique and artifact just conveniently came up whenever characters needed to use them. Did Toji's possession of Inverted Spear make sense? Suuure, and maybe it has some ties to Angel whose technique maybe helped to make it. Doesn't change the fact that it was introduced purely to have a way to deal with Gojo's infinity and Geto's curses. And even the attempt to bring back Yuta-Rika bond in terms of Toji-Worm made no real sense since Rika was created by and bound to Yuta intrinsically while Toji just... tamed and trained the Worm off-screen somehow? Why would Geto's technique not work on it then, how is it different from some cursed spirits being loyal to themselves or the places they are guarding. His use of cursed spirits is clearly different from a regular 'taming' situation. And similar problems happen with techniques like Simple Domain or Falling Blossom, they were just ~invented~ in the past somehow so now people can use that. How do they actually work and why can't people come up with their own bullshit techniques then? Well don't worry about it, it might come up again or probably won't because there is no need for that pesky logic in our magic worldbuilding systems. You could even say that the absence of sense and balance is on purpose since the story on the whole is about how everything is Unfair, but it's not like that's communicated well either so? At this point it feels like anything can happen and not in a good way. Gojo got sealed in a poignant emotional way that im looking forward to in the anime but then... he got released by some convenient technique from a new character? Then didn't give much of a reaction to his plans falling apart in front of him, didn't acknowledge Megumi's situation beyond what it meant for the fight (nothing acknowledging how he both lost one of his strongest potential assets and how he participated in robbing both Megumi and Tsumiki of their youth - this at least might come up in a flashback alongside Nobara's situation, if Nobara is 100% dead then the writing is even shittier for not bringing her up properly), went to have a fun fight, had fun and died rip. Even his dying hallucinations were a generic pat-on-the-back 'u did well haha it's great that u had fun' rather than anything meaningful. You could say Gege is salty towards Gojo specifically but it's not like other main characters are faring any better so far... Yuji vs Sukuna is set up in a way where it's just too simple of a straightforward revenge battle with the side of getting Megumi back or killing him, the only thing we can look forward to really. And i can't be excited about Kenjaku vs anyone bc it's not like Yuji ever showed any interest in his parentage (and no mommy issues agh) or got to know Gojo's backstory or anything that would have given him a personal interest in going against Kenjaku at all and none of the other characters have personal beef with Kenjaku either... Like, Yuta a little, but much less so now that Kenjaku is just another big villain for everyone to defeat rather than 'need to kill him myself so that gojo doesn't have to'. Sukuna vs Kenjaku could also be fun if we learned about their past but a Heian flashback would probably just make the story even less engaging at this point. Plus any fight will still do a bunch of that 'actually i had THIS technique/item/skill all this time or i just came up with it even!!' Probably that's what's going to happen with unrevealed Sukuna techniques and Yuki's research. Yeahhh anyway...

[apk02]

Arthur, in one of the earliest episodes: I want to live in a Camelot where the punishment fits the crime.

This is in reference to Gwen apparently using magic to heal her father from the plague.

This is a not-yet twenty year old Arthur fighting for what he thinks is right. Almost in the next episode, Arthur fights for inclusion of Lancelot in the Knights' ranks. The last discussion that Arthur and Uther have on this is something along the lines of 'Lancelot deserves to be a knight because of the honour and courage he has shown. Screw the first code' and Uther being 'I see you feel very strongly about this' before Lancelot barges in to say he is leaving on his own. And I don't know if it's me, but Uther looked close to giving in to Arthur and you can see the respect in his eyes grow when Lancelot says he is leaving.

There are so many instances in the first season itself (going into danger for a servant, trying to be fair even with the constraints Uther set him, defying Uther in ways that he can, caring for every citizen of Camelot) which show Arthur is going to be fair and just King. It's all there. And it does happen to some extent.

The First Code is scrapped. Punishment is fair. No magic user is unjustly punished during Arthur's reign. The Queen is a commoner. Some of the best knights are commoners. And, I like to think, if Arthur had known everything going on in his kingdom and even without it, the major 'repealing of the magic ban' might have happened eventually. And, all this is after Arthur personally has almost never had any good contact with magic where he knows it's being used for good.

That is why Arthur is a great King even if it's not highlighted so much in the show. Because when you compare Season 1 and Season 4 (ie Uther and Arthur), you see the difference in the way Camelot works. You see not any and every sorcerer attacking Camelot except Morgana and she has a personal vendetta. There is no Edwin or Mary Collins or even Nimueh, who are all hell-bent on revenge or trying to justify their acts as bringing magic back to Camelot. There is only Morgana who has got a personal stake in this and the agenda of bringing magic is long gone and only the throne apparently being rightfully hers is the reason for her continued attacks. You see people not only listening to the King but also discussing with him. You see people following the King out of respect and love instead of fear. That is the Camelot that Arthur wanted among other things.

Arthur, getting Camelot to where it was at the end of Season 5 even when left with the residual hate from Uther's reign is a huge thing. Of course I wish I would have been able to see more and I wish it would have been highlighted more but there are changes. There are great changes and Arthur ultimately did become a great King even with having Uther as a father and it's so underrated sometimes.

[kromlock]

A transcript of my relationship with JK Rowling

Joanne: Hey kid, would you like a decent children’s book? It’s a little dark but it’s also a fun quirky story about a magic school.

Me: Oh hey, I like lots of those things! Hey, this is pretty good for the stuff that’s usually aimed at my age group!

Joanne: Yes, cool. Here’s a sequel. It’s foreshadowing some political intrigue and has a gut wrenching portrayal of the horrors of slavery, but I swear it’s still for kids.

Me: Oh wow, this is even better than the first! Hey, you’re a pretty good mystery writer too.

Joanne: Why, thank you! Now this next one gives Harry some deep backstory.

Me: Wow, I love this! You did a great job shattering the illusion that James was such a great guy!

Joanne: I beg your pardon?

Me: Well, I mean, you kind of outed James as the bully, and like even though it doesn’t excuse his behavior at all, Snape was right about Harry’s dad.

Joanne: ……huh.

Me: And I loved the disability rights theme so much I didn’t notice the part where the central character in the disability metaphor then turns his condition into a deadly liability in a boarding school. Or the skin crawling ideological implications of that.

Joanne: Hold on a second. I have to do something.

Me: What’s up?

Joanne: Just jotting down notes. Snape…. Was… Right….

Me: Well I didn’t mean it like THAT…

Joanne: Skin crawling… ideological…. Implications…. Okay, all done. By the way, here’s an extra long book!

Me: WHOA HOLY HELL does the shit hit the fan here! The bad guy’s back in action, the government is Fucking Horrible, and the Avengers are assembling. And that gleam of triumph in Dumbledore’s eye! I bet you’re going somewhere great with that! God I can’t wait to find out what happens next. It’s just… umm… a couple things.

Joanne: Yeah?

Me: Why did it have to be so long? And I like plot twists and all but this was just weird and convoluted.

Joanne: No, but you see, more is better.

Me: Huh. I guess I see your reasoning there. But another thing I just realized. This is a bad school.

Joanne: Excuse me?

Me: It’s a death trap and the faculty is incompetent. 

Joanne: Dumbledore is a legendary sorcerer, philosopher, and warrior!

Me: But that doesn’t make him a good teacher! That’s a completely different skillset!

Joanne: And about the death trap! That’s because of Voldemort. He does evil things.

Me: Voldemort didn’t resurrect an ancient blood sport for children. The first event was throwing teenagers one by one into an arena with a pissed off dragon to just see what happens.

Joanne: They were all supposed to be of age, and the binding magic contract-

Me: They couldn’t just rewrite the contract? Do they have to use the exact same cursed artifact that they used thousands of years ago, with the only guard around it having easy exploits?

Joanne: ….

Me: Come to think of it, the other books were pretty fucked up too. It’s quicker to list the school years where someone doesn’t die on campus.

Joanne: I-

Me: And I don't mean "Old Professor Giddyfart passed away in his sleep last night. He was 239 years young." I mean "Our star pupil was murdered in cold blood by Wizard Hitler during our international child bloodsport tournament."

Joanne: Technically that was off-campus.

Me: "Last year our students almost had their souls stolen by undead horrors that were posted here -at a fucking school- because that’s a good idea. This was minutes after almost being mauled by our werewolf on staff."

Joanne: They were only there because they thought a convicted-

Me: "Oh, that was also the same day we had a former Nazi combatant come to lop off the head of a hippogriff who actually did maul another student for the dreadful crime of not paying attention in class.”

Joanne: 

Me: "Oh and the year before it turned out we just kinda had a basilisk in the plumbing and it kept turning students to stone, it was really annoying, totally disrupted the curriculum”

Joanne: But that was because-

Me: "Oh and the year before that one of our teachers was possessed by the still-living shade of Wizard Hitler. He set a troll loose in the school to try and steal our Bring-Shades-Back-To-Life Macguffin. We just figured it was the safest place because our unhinged headmaster is fucking Hercules, Perseus, and Theseus rolled into one. He could've taken a sabbatical to guard it without putting children in harm’s way, but he's just that quirky!"

Joanne: Well, perhaps Dumbledore isn’t all perfect-

Me: "What's that? Oh yeah, it's guarded by goddamn Cerberus, and a series of challenges even more dangerous than goddamn Cerberus. But don't worry, we sealed the door with a spell that a first year student can unlock."

Joanne: What are you getting at?

Me: Where’s the lawsuits? Absolutely nothing was done to rein Dumbledore in. Well, except for once and it was the one time the danger wasn’t his fault and it was at the behest of the bad guys and swiftly overturned.

Joanne: Government regulation?

Me: And what the fuck was with that “Hermione is an idiot for being against slavery” thing? That made me feel icky.

Joanne: Well, I will be right back!

Me: Oh, okay.

Me: Maybe that was a bit rude. Every story has its flaws.

Me: ….

Me: Wow, Lord of the Rings is really good.

Joanne: Here’s book 5! Harry Potter and the Reason Government Regulation Is Bad

Me: Uh… this is quite a bit longer than the last one.

Joanne: Yes.

Me: The one that I thought was way longer than it had to be.

Joanne: Yes.

Me: And I just read it, and like nothing happened in it. You took the shortest story so far and padded it out with a weird political manifesto.

Joanne: More is bette-

Me: And it’s not even good politics! Anyone but the most Randian hardcore libertarian would want to do something when a school actively contributes to the death of a student.

Joanne: Yeah but the person doing it is juuuuuust a fucking cunt.

Me: I mean, yeah I have to admit she was a pretty good villain. Kinda overshadows Voldemort though, you should really step up the menace in your main antagonist because all he’s done so far is get his ass kicked by a bunch of high school students.

Joanne: Ohhhh just you wait. Okay I’ll be right back.

Me: Oh, okay.

Me: I think we really connected that time.

Me: …..

Me: Huh, Revenge of the Sith was pretty good actually.

Joanne: Okay, this one is all about Voldemort. Also I heard you like Lord of the Rings, so you’re in for some good stuff!

Me: Do tell!

Joanne: So the One Ring was cool right?

Me: Oh yeah, it’s menacing as hell.

Joanne: Well Voldemort made SEVEN One Rings! You can One Ringify any object in this universe.

Me: …please tell me you gave it a name other than One Ring.

Joanne: I sure did! It’s called a Horcrux.

Me: ….Horcrux.

Joanne: You got it!

Me: …….so you can turn anything into a One Ring?

Joanne: You bet! And that diary from book 2 was a One Ring.

Me: Hey that’s a pretty cool retcon.

Joanne: Or maybe… I had it planned all along.

Me: No you didn’t.

Joanne: And just you wait, I have a big twist on those things coming in the next-

Me: It’s that Harry’s scar is a One Ring.

Joanne: …

Me: What? It’s kind of obvious.

Joanne: ….anyway they’re being super careful to make the school safe now so YOU’RE WELCOME. Plot hole fixed.

Me: This book ends with a bunch of Wizard Nazis infiltrating the school, assassinating the headmaster, spray painting a Wizard Swastika in the sky, trashing the place, and just walking out. So yeah, pretty safe. You know what, screw it. The movies are pretty good so I’ve tricked myself into still liking this shit. Hey, if you keep up your writing pace then Harry’s gonna graduate the same year I do! You gonna have the grand finale out in time?

Joanne: I sure am! Here it is, it’s more than worth the wait.

Me: WHOA now this is more like it! The last book was kind of a mess, but this? I love the dystopian setting and the breaking of the formula, and the moral complexity of Dumbledore, and you even managed to do some cool stuff with that Horcrux shit. And ohhh, the schoolgrounds are an actual castle so of course that’s where the final battle takes place, and it’s still fucked up that this is a school but that’s also pretty cool. And here’s the final confrontation, aaaaand…..

Joanne: And? And?

Me: …..what the hell was that ending?

Joanne: Excuse me?

Me: The bad guy dies on a weird wand ownership technicality? Not a whisper about freeing the slaves or undoing any of the other heinous shit the government does and permits? Harry names his son after the greasy incel who blew it with his mom when he shouted slurs at her and never got over it?

Joanne: Severus is a tragic figure who never stopped caring about the woman he loved!

Me: He held on to a creepy obsession with the idea of her while devoting his professional life to tormenting her surviving loved ones.

Joanne: He had to keep up appearances to fool Voldemort.

Me: He tried to poison a sensitive awkward child’s pet in front of his class, just because he could! Well before he was a blip on Voldemort’s radar! You know what, the movies have been doing a pretty good job cleaning up this mess so far, so I guess your job’s done. Oh, one more thing. I still don’t know what the hell was up with that gleam of triumph in Dumbledore’s eye?

Joanne: Oh, that’s a thing to do with his blood and Lily’s protection and the power of love and-

Me: You didn’t have anything planned, got it.

Joanne: Well, I never! I bid you farewell! And by the way, you were wrong! Harry’s scar wasn’t a One Ring! Harry’s SOUL was a One Ring!

Me: …okay, bye 

Me: Say, the movies really did clean up that bullshit. You know, I think the series was pretty good after all.

Me: ……

Me: Well the new God of War was a pleasant surprise-

Joanne: BACK BEFORE PLUMBING WIZARDS SHIT THEMSELVES!

Me: Uh, what?

Joanne: THE AMERICAN TERM FOR MUGGLE IS “NO-MAJ”

Me: Is this a troll account?

Joanne: DID I MENTION TRANS PEOPLE ARE A BLIGHT?

Me: Oh no, this is just awful. Please stop tarnishing your weirdly good reputation.

Joanne: I WILL NOT BE SILENCED! MY NEW BOOK IS ABOUT HOW INTERNET TROLLS ARE BEING MEAN TO MEEEEE

Me: You know, maybe I can do without Harry Potter in my life.

Joanne: I’M BEING CANCELLEEEEEEDD