#what a bad service
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It doesn't matter if you turned off the light and closed the bar, I decide when I leave
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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Wait you guys are actually buying Disney products I thought it was a joke
(READ TAGS FOR FULL CONTEXT Sorry it’s long dies
#Honestly I’m only bothered bc I feel partially responsible (WTF EGOMANIAC OVER HERE)#I know I can’t control other people’s spending habits and my own habits are. Less than ideal !!#But when I wanted to spread my love for Wreck it Ralph I didn’t want people to get that takeaway 😔#IMPORTANT NOTE ‼️It’s okay to express your love for something through buying official things !!! That DOESN’T make you a “bad person” !!!#Still ! I think we have to let ourselves feel bothered by things and we need to be more critical of exploitative companies#Of course I chose to watch inside out 2 with my mom in theaters so I’m not immune lmao. Also using amazon / Etsy … just as a whole#But if you need help finding Disney movies without supporting them please just ask me!! PLEASE don’t use Disney+ if you can avoid it#I know we are all capable of finding our fulfillment from better places. But sometimes it’s hard#Capitalism sucks and yet that’s how we are endlessly pressured to live :(#We’re all at different points in our lives. Sometimes self care involves consumerism#Be hopeful that it someday won’t have to#Txt#again I’m sorry if this comes off as horribly egotistical to even consider being single-handedly responsible for#Social media is bad …. numbers bad…. Distorts reality and your perception of yourself…..#Or as me trying to guilt trip people in any way. Genuinely do what makes you happy but WE CAN BE HAPPIER & HEALTHIER I KNOW WE CAN#Wreck it ralph#Rant#Also sorry I have huge beef with streaming services I don’t mean to enforce that on other people but also. Sharing my opinion
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(mild gore)
fealty
#i. i dont know if there's a better way to content warn on tumblr. im not gonna lie ive never posted something that could need one#like this gore seems v v mild to me so i wasnt sure if it needed it at all? but like idk i wanna try to be respectful i wanna TRY#this was my main page piece for the horror zine!! jokes on u the lettie collab was a SIDE commitment. this was my main deal#i saw this so clearly like a vision in my head. its what made me want to apply in the first place ouughghh#its the service. its the undying loyalty. its the devotion and commitment to serving the throne. im WEAK im a SUCKER#i rly do just think something abt royalty settings invoke so much in me. its immediately intriguing and diasom has it BAD (positive)#i do what i must for my people. the silver fans. when he is suffering the content is tasty like im sorry but its true </3 i love him#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#malleus draconia#lilia vanrouge#suntails#mild gore#gore
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if i see one more person try to claim aziraphale doesn’t love crowley as much as crowley loves aziraphale i will throw hands.
say it with me: just because they show & express their love for each other differently doesn’t mean one of them loves the other more
#some of y’all will do anything to make aziraphale the bad guy and honestly i’m tired of it#like yes i know anthony “acts of service’’ crowley is out here wearing his love on his sleeve#but if you for one second try to convince me aziraphale did not INVENT heart eyes i don’t know what to say to you#aziraphale is so fucking in love it’s insane#y’all were not paying any attention if you think aziraphale doesn’t love crowley back#i will not tolerate aziraphale slander any longer#aziraphale apologist#anthony j crowley#crowley#aziraphale#aziracrow#ineffable husbands#good omens#ineffable wives
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the thing about labru vs kabumisu is that both of them have the same core appeal to me, specifically from kabru's side of things: kabru being someone who is constantly agonizing about social rules and putting on the right mask, and meeting this Weird Fucking Guy who does not (cannot) care about all those things, and so kabru slowly allows himself to be more genuine. they're both such good relationships (whether you view them romantically or platonically), why must there be so much hostility between enjoyers of these ships?
#they are ALSO both ''just when you think you've hit rock bottom you want to fuck a blonde guy''#(yes ik mithrun's hair is technically silver but it's blonde enough)#eliot posts#dunme#ships#dungeon meshi#dm spoilers#dungeon meshi spoilers#labru#kabumisu#i love both so i feel like i'm winning either way. multi track drifting!#i think i like kabumisu slightly more bc i am an acts of service enjoyer at heart#but both are good#the only ship that i'm that gung ho about is farcllle (but also i'd never get into a shipping war over it bc im not fucking 12 years old)#why is there so much shipping war in this fandom??? it's so fucking bonkers. is it fucking 2014???#what makes it more annoying is that this series is so light on romance and focuses on platonic relationships#how did this series attract so many rabid shippers???#this post has been up for 2 hours and someone was already posting bad take reductive ship hate in the replies#get blocked <3 you are a deeply obnoxious human being god bless your heart
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The bourgeois or "exploiting class" doesn't inherently include the person who gets their nails done biweekly, or the disabled person who has a carer, or the guy who got a $70 video game for full-price, or the person who relies on medication (yes even the ones you don't think they "need"), or anything else like this. None of these people will, on average, have the ability to exploit workers by means of ownership or whatever.
While you are busy fighting with fellow workers, you are still being exploited by your boss, by capitalism, by (potentially) not having healthcare, by being overworked and underpaid, and so are they.
#politics#feel like this wording isn't satisfactory for me but fuck it we ball#used bourgeois because i think as a colloquial word it's recognized but like...#...i dunno i think some people use it to mean 'person who can do [x]' even if they quite literally own no means of production#like the idea that you're exploiting a worker by agreeing to a service they provide isn't what bourgeois means#if i paid a carer to care for a disabled person they aren't being exploited by that disabled person...#...HOWEVER that carer absolutely can (and probably will be) exploited by the systems of power (eg their boss or capitalism)#perhaps it's too late at night for me to be posting about this but it's something that bothers me!#*especially* when it comes to disability and other groups already exploited by marginalization 👍#if your leftism percludes the disabled (including the terminally and profoundly) or the elderly or the queer or so so much i don't WANT ITTT#saw a disabled person i follow lament how afraid they were to have a carer out of fear of Being a Bad Exploitative Person#and they obviously need one and that makes me so fucking angry to know that they are needlessly suffering
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chirpy, chirpy~ like father like son i suppose
2024-25 Media Day | 9.18.24 (x)(x)
and absolutely delightful that colby kept up the inside joke yeah babey nothing like our beat and our cats opening up preseason hockey by being chirpy
#paul maurice#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#preseason#absolutely kills me paul came back and immediately chose violence#coach paul maurice is certainly rested and refreshed#his frenemy dynamic with george really kills me everytime#old men at the retirement home squabbling#are they friends? are they enemies? do they still hold a grudge over bingo night last tuesday? who knows!#george going “i tried...” and paul immediately going IT WAS GOOD#this just in paul ran into the canadian wild with no cell service so he didnt have to face george more news at 11#colby droning what matthew told him to say is so funny to me#im not sure when colby decided to part ways with fhn and when he brought it up to matthew#but its terribly adorable the way he went oh well now you HAVE to pay the stanley cup champion maffhew tax#since you can write bad things about me now#the little smile that blossoms on his face when the consequences of his actions flourish#once again he really has our beat trained
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intruder
backstory of why jimmy and scott moved out of the super neighborhood in my empires superpowers au!
cw: murder (in SELF-DEFENSE) of an unnamed character, blood/violence, like a decent bit of it, injury, dissociation
~
Scott’s been missing for two days.
Scott’s been missing for two days, and Jimmy isn’t going to wait around doing nothing.
The news had come in the form of a knock on the front door, around 3pm on the first day. Jimmy doesn’t officially live at Scott’s house, but he spends a fair amount of time there, and now he pushes back from the kitchen table and heads to the front door, snapping on the mask that hangs on a hook by the entrance.
“Oh, hi, TJ!” Blossom says when he opens the door to find her on the step, flowers actively winding around in her hair. “Is Major around?”
Jimmy frowns, checks his watch. “Um, he left for work this morning, around eight? He shouldn’t be back until four, at the earliest.”
Why would Blossom be asking him this? Don’t they all have some sort of hero group chat?
“Are you sure?” Blossom’s smile drops. “Did he say he was headed somewhere else?”
“Just to work,” says Jimmy. “Why? What’s up?”
Blossom bites her lip, the flowers in her hair wilting. “He never showed,” she says. “He isn’t responding to messages.”
That’s enough for Jimmy to shut the door and run back to the table, grabbing his cell phone. Then he returns, pulling it open again. Blossom is still there, looking a little surprised.
Jimmy pulls up his contacts, clicks on the one labeled ‘scott :) - super’ and hits call.
“You’ve reached Major, I’m probably winning a battle right now. Send me a text and I’ll get back to you when I have a moment.”
Straight to voicemail.
That can’t be good.
“Try the Mad King,” Jimmy tells her. “I’m still working until four, but keep me updated. Do you have my number?”
But Blossom never texts him any news.
And Joel tells him, that night, that Scott’s officially missing, and they’re moving Jimmy to a safehouse.
So it isn’t even 8pm when Jimmy finds himself in a small apartment downtown, the dim light of the setting sun half-illuminating the single room.
And Jimmy stays there all night, staring at his phone, as his worry crescendos over and over again, blowing out lightbulbs and spoiling food can by can.
They still haven’t found him in the morning.
Jimmy can do nothing but sit, alone, in this cheap, unused apartment of Joel’s, waiting for some message that his boyfriend has been found.
But there’s nothing, and Jimmy isn’t going to wait around doing nothing when Scott could be getting tortured right now.
Because that’s it, really. When Jimmy went missing, it was because some horrid, insane villain kidnapped him and ran experiments on him and treated him like an animal—
One of the blades on the floor fan comes off, crashing to the bottom of the fan cage.
Jimmy takes a deep breath.
He can’t continue to sit here on the ragged carpet (because there’s no furniture other than a single folding chair and a mattress) while Scott could be going through the exact same things that he had been subjected to.
Or worse, he thinks, pushing back a sickening memory.
So Jimmy packs up his little backpack that he hasn’t actually unpacked yet except to get his toothbrush, grabs the mask he’d left on the kitchen counter (which he balls up and shoves in the pocket of his jeans), and leaves, ready to find Scott.
Where does Scott usually go first?
He covers all of the city, but rarely ventures away from the most densely populated areas. Downtown is one of his favorites to frequent, as well as the pier.
Good thing Jimmy knows downtown like the back of his hand.
He catches the bus like it’s second nature, the schedule practically tattooed on the inside of his eyelids (despite the fact that he rarely rode the bus for fear of causing an accident. He learned it in case anyone ever asked him the bus schedule). He hasn’t spent much time out and about on his own, but he can get around and he’s lived with Lizzie long enough to know how to go somewhere by himself. That doesn’t mean he isn’t careful: he sits at the back of the bus with his back pressed against the window and watches everyone, careful to sort them into threat categories and keep tabs on everyone.
It’s exhausting. It always is.
It isn’t long at all before he leaves the bus at one of Scott’s favorite places—right across the way from the elementary school. Scott heads here first thing most mornings, keeping an eye on the children as they arrive at school.
The mask is scrunched uncomfortably in Jimmy’s pocket. He wishes he could put it on. He hates going out in public—not without at least a baseball cap.
It feels like everyone at this park is watching him.
Any of them could be in league with whoever took Scott. Any of them could have been one of the thugs that worked for Xornoth. Any of them could be someone he hurt in the past.
Every time someone walks past him, Jimmy automatically tenses. That woman could attack him. That man could crush his skull. That child could be a distraction. That man could grab him and pull him into an alley.
Jimmy shoves his hands in his hoodie’s pocket so that he doesn’t have to look at how they tremble. This is why he doesn’t go places alone. This is why he works from home right now.
This is why people need to not get kidnapped. Specifically the people that can help him not panic about being kidnapped.
Right, now, does he usually patrol around the school? Or just wait out front and watch the kids go in?
If he was Scott, what would he do?
Scott would probably patrol. He likes to be moving, likes to show off his skills.
So Jimmy hikes out of the park and crosses the road to the school, following the sidewalk all around the building.
On one side is an alley between some run-down apartments, and Jimmy passes through, keeping a close eye on anything out of place. Any knocked-over trash cans, any smears of dirt or dried blood on buildings, anything that could be the signs of a struggle.
He feels more and more anxious the further down he goes, swallowing back the thrumming of his power within him, the scar at the base of his skull burning.
He can’t cause an accident here. He's next to an elementary school, he can’t risk it.
Can he?
What accidents can he cause here?
Jimmy’s never really reached out with his powers before on purpose—not in a long time, not in a searching way.
But his powers can cause terrible things to happen, things as far away as inside the school, and if his power can know that there’s things that far away to ruin, then can’t he know, too?
So he reaches out into the surrounding buildings.
There are a lot of people here.
That’s the first thing he feels.
There’s hundreds of children in the school, and one of these buildings is an apartment complex, and Jimmy can’t see them or even really sense them? He just . . . knows that they’re there, in some kind of . . . sixth sense?
There are so many other things that he knows are there, but can’t verbalize. He simply knows, to an overwhelming degree, the contents of everything around and maybe there’s a reason he’s never done this before because he thinks he’s going to be sick—
“TJ!”
Jimmy flinches, hears something crash in the distance. He wheels around—this could be it this is the moment he’s kidnapped—, only to find fWhip standing at the mouth of the alley.
“Why are you out and about?” fWhip asks, moseying over, hands in his pockets. “Don’t you usually stay home from the cool parties?”
Right. He knows fWhip. Kind of. fWhip is nice, right? He helped save him.
Jimmy isn’t wearing his mask. Which is fine. It’s fine to not be wearing it, because fWhip recognized him anyways and his secret identity isn’t contingent on a mask anymore.
���Um, I’m looking for Major,” he says, head still spinning a bit. “He usually goes here every morning, and nobody saw him for his whole shift, so if he got kidnapped it was probably near—”
“Wait, Major’s missing?”
Jimmy frowns. “Yeah, did you not hear? He disappeared yesterday.”
fWhip checks over his shoulder, adjusts his goggles. “Okay. Not good. And if Major’s missing, why aren’t you in a safehouse?”
“Well, I was,” Jinmy says, looking down at his feet. How has he been caught already? He just barely left!
“But you couldn’t stick around when Major could be . . . being tortured?” guesses fWhip.
Jimmy shifts uncomfortably. “Yeah,” he says dejectedly. “But I can go back. The Mad King would—”
“Nah, don’t do that. I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to. Do you need help looking?”
And before Jimmy can so much as process what he’s said, fWhip is reaching up to the window in the building beside them, testing the latch and finding it open.
“Let’s check out this place,” he suggests, shoving the window open and grabbing the sill, pushing himself up and into the window in an impressive show of upper-body strength.
Jimmy blinks.
He didn’t expect to be joined in his search.
Let alone by fWhip.
“Okay, nobody’s here,” fWhip calls out the window. “You coming?”
“Is there a door?” Jimmy asks halfheartedly.
fWhip shrugs.
Jimmy sighs, grips the windowsill (a bit lower for him than it had been for fWhip), and heaves himself up, legs kicking for purchase on the wall and arms trembling under his weight.
He falls back once, arm scraping a bit against the sill, then manages to pull himself up the second time, his ribcage pressed in painfully against the windowsill, where he hangs for a moment before tipping over and landing in a heap on the other side.
“Try to roll when you come in,” fWhip advises as Jimmy picks himself up. “It’s easier. And way more cool.”
“I’ll remember that,” Jimmy grumbles, brushing the copious streaks of dust off his hoodie.
“So we’re looking at an abandoned first floor of some office building, I think,” fWhip says, flipping a switch on his goggles. “See anything?”
Jimmy looks around. It’s a fairly large space, the concrete ground scarred by the torn-up carpet (some of which still lies in an awkward heap against a wall), a single dead office chair sitting in the middle of the room. Otherwise, there’s some brightly-colored papers in a corner, and—
The front door slams open.
“TJ,” comes a suspicious and familiar voice.
The Mad King is standing in the doorway.
“Rats,” fWhip says, frowning. “Did you follow me?”
“You and Mythics are always up to no good,” Joel tells him dismissively, before turning back to Jimmy, arms crossed. “Why are you here?”
“Um . . . looking for Major?” Jimmy tries.
Joel raises an eyebrow. “With fWhip? Come on, TJ, if you were going to break house arrest it should’ve been with someone respectable.”
“Hey!”
“Come on, back to the safehouse.”
“But—”
“TJ,” Joel says firmly. “We aren’t arguing about this. I’ll keep looking for Major, yeah? You need—”
“But I, I can help!” Jimmy insists. This isn’t fair, he shouldn’t be locked up when his boyfriend could be going through the worst experiences of his life—
“Jimmy,” Joel grits out. fWhip makes a ‘yikes’ face, turns to start going through the neon papers in the corner.
“Since Major has been kidnapped, they will want to get the people he cares about the most—you,” Joel stresses. “They will want to hurt you to get him to give up whatever information they’re looking for. That’s why—”
“I know, I know, but I can defend myself,” argues Jimmy. “It’s—it’s Sc—I mean, it’s Major. I have to help. And I know—”
“You’re helping by staying safe,” says Joel. “I’m not arguing about this, okay?”
“Who would have a bake sale and then put the signs in an abandoned building?” fWhip murmurs, examining one of the said signs.
Which is stupid.
This is stupid.
How does Joel expect him to just sit there?
How can he tell Jimmy to go hide and let Scott get hurt?
But there’s no point in fighting this.
“Maybe there’s some way you can help from the apartment, okay?” Joel says placatingly, and Jimmy rolls his eyes.
“Sure. Fine, take me back, officer.”
“Don’t get an attitude with me, young man,” Joel warns, sputtering jokingly, but Jimmy’s stomach squirms just the slightest bit.
He’s not a child.
“fWhip, I’ll be back here in half an hour, okay?” Joel says. “Let me know if you find anything.”
Then he strides out the door, Jimmy reluctantly following along behind.
-
Joel finds Scott the next day.
It’s a small place, a closed mechanic shop, near the East side of the city, where this particular gang of villains decided to keep him.
Joel finds him by checking the security footage of the elementary school. He sees, in the corner of one of the cameras, a couple of neon signs hanging on the side of the building fWhip and Jimmy had broken into.
Backing it up a little bit, Joel finds the car that carried the people who hung up the signs (something they did several hours before dawn).
And when he tracks down that car, he finds Scott.
Jimmy receives the text that Scott’s been found and instantly calls Lizzie, begging her for a ride home. Lizzie agrees, and when Joel and Scott come through the front door, Jimmy is there waiting, a frozen pizza in the oven.
Jimmy drops everything, his stress releasing in a little burst of power that crashes his phone and knocks all the cushions off the sofa, hurrying toward Scott.
Scott looks absolutely exhausted. His suit is torn here and there, his hair tangled and greasy, his eyelids drooping. But he gives Jimmy a small smile and acquiesces to a gentle hug.
“Glad you’re safe,” Scott murmurs. “I was worried.”
Jimmy chuckles, pitched a little high with nerves. “You were worried? Imagine my state!”
Scott pulls away, plants a small kiss on Jimmy’s lips before tugging off his mask, mouth twisting in a grimace.
There’s a large bruise on his cheek, and a small line of them down his jaw, but he otherwise doesn’t seem to be in very bad condition. Still, Jimmy frets, hands twisting anxiously.
“Where are you hurt? Do you need to get checked out? You really should go to the hospital, just in—”
“I’m fine,” Scott cuts him off. “Just some bruises. It’s all right.”
Even so, Scott stands there patiently, as Jimmy takes in every part of him.
He seems to be telling the truth. Nothing looks broken or like it’s bleeding too badly. He’s holding himself a little gingerly, though, that could be a broken rib—
Jimmy prods at his chest and Scott steps back, hands over himself.
“It’s not broken,” Scott says, teeth gritted. “Joel already tried it. Just a deep bruise.”
“Probably the worst kidnappers I’ve ever seen,” Joel calls from the kitchen, where he’d gone after pushing past the two of them in the hall. “Didn’t even know how to torture him properly.”
Torture? “Scott, I’m so sorry—do you need anything? Should I schedule you a therapy appointment?”
Scott bursts out laughing. “Thank you, baby,” he says. “I’m fine. I promise. Just tired.”
“And an idiot,” adds Joel. “How’d you manage to get kidnapped by such an incompetent lot?”
“Their signs said homemade croissants,” Scott moans, walking into the kitchen as if nothing ever happened (though his arm is still wrapped around his ribs). “You know I love supporting small local businesses.”
“’Twas your downfall,” Joel intones, snickering. “Sorry, mate.”
Jimmy follows awkwardly, not entirely sure how to behave.
Scott’s . . . fine?
He hadn’t even considered that as an outcome. He hadn’t dared to think that Scott might return without severe injuries, without being traumatized by the torture and greatly needing help returning to the real world.
Like Jimmy had been.
He doesn’t know what he can even do.
How can he help Scott when Scott doesn’t need help?
So Jimmy just kind of hovers, near Scott, as he sits there and eats pizza and jokes a little with Joel.
Then Scott leaves to go shower, and Joel shoots Jimmy a sympathetic smile.
“He’s fine,” Joel assures him. “He may be a bit clumsy for a while—his hands were zip-tied pretty tightly together—but he’s really fine.”
It’s hard to believe him.
But Jimmy just nods and resolves to not treat Scott strangely. He’s fine, after all.
If he’s fine, then so is Jimmy.
-
That night, there’s something wrong.
Jimmy wakes up quite suddenly, the odd sixth sense that he’d probed at the other day ringing with the notice that something is off.
He doesn’t know what. He doesn’t know what’s changed in their surroundings, but he knows that it’s not quite right and he needs to be aware of it.
Jimmy blinks open his eyes, glances over to Scott to reassure himself that his partner is safely there.
And leaning over Scott, a knife gleaming in their hand and poised above Scott’s chest, is a person dressed in black.
Jimmy reacts immediately.
He dives over Scott, knocking the man’s arm just as he sinks the knife down—Scott wakes with a cry of pain, the knife carving a jagged line in his chest and up his shoulder as the man is knocked off course.
Jimmy rolls off of Scott, faces the intruder for a brief second.
The intruder spits out a curse, then barrels into Jimmy, brandishing his knife.
Jimmy moves on instinct. He grapples with the man, twists his wrist with the knife—the man slashes at him, but Jimmy twists further until his grip loosens on the hilt, and then he takes the knife.
He spent hours and days and weeks training with Xornoth in knife work and he knows exactly how to attack to injure, which spots are the most painful without being fatal. He stabs the knife into the attacker’s upper arm, then into his side when he howls and twists away, and Jimmy can’t help but show off a bit as he flips the knife to his other hand and drives it into the man’s knee.
The intruder falls to his knees, and Jimmy’s head is pounding with the adrenaline, and he can’t move his focus from taking this man out entirely because he tried to kill Scott—
Jimmy spins around to be behind the man, hands on his throat—the man grabs at his wrists, nails scrabbling against his skin—and sends a burst of power out.
Under his sweaty palms, knife still tucked between the fingers of his right hand, Jimmy feels the man’s neck break. Not just the bone: his vocal cords snap—his muscles fall loose—his throat collapses, and so does the man, falling heavily to the carpet.
Jimmy stands there, panting.
Scott wheezes in pain.
Jimmy fumbles on the bedside table, grabs Scott’s hero phone with fingers slick with blood. He presses the emergency button on the side, holds it down for a solid five seconds.
Then he drops it back on the table, opens one of the drawers to pull out Scott’s mask.
“Jimmy,” Scott gasps, sitting up, clutching his arm over the slash in his shirt. “Are—are you okay?”
Jimmy nods, then he clicks on the bedside lamp, bathing the room in low, yellow light, and surveys Scott.
There’s a sheen of sweat over Scott’s bruised face, his eyes pained and confused (and concerned, and very very worried), but Jimmy barely registers that as his eyes find the wound.
His nightshirt is soaked in blood, spreading out from the slash, and it only takes one glance at the wound for Jimmy to know that it needs a professional to take a look at it. He doesn’t know near enough about injuries to know anything other than that it looks bad.
He leans over Scott (Scott flinches back) and pulls the mask over his face, carefully holding the knife pointed away from him. His hair catches a bit in the eyeholes and Jimmy doesn’t do anything about it.
"Major?" calls a voice from below, and Jimmy spins around, knife held out, as he hears the stairs creak with running footsteps. Was there back-up? No matter. There won’t be, soon.
A pajama-clad Blossom pushes open the door from where it's half-open (Scott always closes the door when they go to bed), her hands flying to her mouth when she takes in the scene. "Oh my gosh—Major, TJ, what happened? Should I call an ambulance? I'll call one—"
"Hello? Is everything okay?"
More footsteps, then Gem appears, mask pulled over tangled hair.
"Hi, we need an ambulance—the address—"
"What happened?" Gem says, echoing Blossom's words as Blossom turns away, one hand covering the ear not pressed to her phone.
Scott pushes himself up further, grimacing. "Intruder," he manages, nodding toward the body on the floor. Gem glances at it, before her eyes fix on Jimmy.
"TJ, sit down—where are you hurt? Where do you guys keep your first aid kit?"
"It's not my blood," Jimmy says, his voice too loud in his ears. He gestures with the knife toward the motionless body, the neck appearing kind of . . . squashed. "I'm fine. Check Major."
"Shoot, the attacker," Gem mutters. "Blossom, tell them that there's two or three people that need—"
"He's dead," Jimmy interrupts. "Don't worry about him. Check Major."
Gem blinks.
Meets Jimmy's eyes.
"Okay," she says after a moment. "I'll check Major. Did you kill him?"
Jimmy swallows.
"He was attacking us," he says stiffly. "He stabbed Major. I acted in self-defense."
Gem moves around and climbs onto Jimmy's empty side of the bed, still keeping an eye on him even as she checks out Scott, pulling away his shirt and asking quiet questions (to which Scott responds, his breath shallow and words faltering).
"The ambulance should be here soon," Blossom says, moving toward the foot of the bed. "TJ, you're covered in blood—set that knife down, let me help you."
"It's not my blood," Jimmy says again. "I'm fine."
"Okay, then—"
"You help Major," Gem says, slipping off the bed and coming back over. "I'll help TJ wash up. C'mon."
Numbly, Jimmy follows her out of the room, checking over his shoulder to make sure Scott is okay. Scott waves him on with the hand that isn’t held to his chest, and Jimmy continues down the hall, into the bathroom.
"We'll have to make this quick," Gem says. "Sit down. And give me that knife."
Jimmy doesn't want to give her the knife. He pulls it back to his chest when she reaches for it, thumbs the blade protectively.
"I need the knife to give it to Major, so that when the police get here we can have a convincing story without you in it. Make sense?"
After considering, Jimmy nods. It makes sense.
And that means he needs to not be here.
He hands over the knife. "I killed him," he says. "If they ask, Major stabbed him three times. Then he fell and broke his neck."
Gem shakes her head. "Okay. Wow. Okay. You know we don't normally kill people, right? Never mind. I'll go give this to Major."
Jimmy glances in the mirror as she steps past. There's blood spattered across his face, more in splashes on his nightshirt and shorts and arms. His eyes, cold and wide, peer back at him out of his pale face.
He needs to get out of here.
Gem returns after two or three minutes, handing Jimmy a jacket (one of Scott’s, he distantly notices).
"Zip that up over the blood, rinse off your hands, and let's go," she says. "We'll head to my place. Blossom will ride with Major in the ambulance. It doesn't look too bad, so he should be okay."
Jimmy obeys, letting Gem turn on the water so he can stick his hands under the cold spray.
For a moment, he's back there—just trying to scrub the blood off his hands from his first intentional murder in the sink with the broken handle.
Then he blinks, looking down at the sink, at the red running off his hands.
"Good enough. Let's go."
-
Joel joins them in Gem's dark kitchen after about two hours, stripping off a pair of gloves. He's fully dressed in his supersuit, his hair unbrushed and his posture stooped, looking more exhausted than ever.
"Gem, you have anything caffeinated?" Joel asks, opening a cupboard.
"Yeah, there's a pot of coffee already made. Mugs are in the left cupboard."
Jimmy watches as Joel finds a mug, fills it up with coffee, and then takes a swig of it black.
"Thanks," he says, face scrunching up at the taste. Joel doesn't like black coffee. Jimmy knows that. He always adds cream and sugar.
"Major's okay," Joel informs them, pulling out a chair at the kitchen table to sit across from them.
Jimmy's been here more or less in silence for the past hour and a half, staring at the wooden table. When they'd first come in, Gem had sent him to wash his hands and arms and face better than he had before, but there's nothing they can do about his sleepclothes, so he's just been sitting here in a blood-spattered t-shirt for a while. Gem had joined him after pulling a hoodie over her pajamas and starting the coffee maker, and has since sat beside him, working on a crossword puzzle.
"Major's okay, he and Blossom are at the hospital now. The intruder was pronounced dead on site. Major identified him as one of the men who kidnapped him."
Jimmy doesn't feel anything.
No sense of satisfaction at knowing that the man truly deserved it, no fear at how close they had been to getting killed, no guilt for his actions.
Nothing.
"TJ," Joel says hesitantly, "how are you doing?"
Jimmy shrugs.
He's still covered in the blood of the man he murdered.
"They say killing is like riding a bike," Jimmy says after a long pause. "You never quite forget how to do it."
Gem sighs. Joel winces.
"Right. Well, we don't really kill people, as a general rule. It's kind of, like, against the law."
The law.
As if the law applies to heroes and villains.
Jimmy's not really sure which one he is right now.
Neither, probably. Which means the law should apply to him, even if it hasn’t stuck in the past.
"I've never really been one to follow the law," Jimmy says.
"Sure, but as a person—"
He isn't a person. If anything was to prove that fact, it would be tonight. He hadn’t thought, he’d just acted, and even now the first feeling that he can even register is the feeling of not feeling. He isn’t a person.
He's a weapon.
He's a pet.
That's the word that triggers his therapy brain.
"I'm in a bad headspace," Jimmy interrupts Joel, using words that he'd rehearsed with Nora. "I don't feel like a person right now. I might be dissociating."
"We have to talk about this," Joel insists. "We can't run away from hard conversations—"
"I promised I would never kill again," Jimmy whispers, and, ah. There’s the panic. Detached and not quite real, but panic nonetheless. "I can't escape it. I'm not—I can't. I'm a weapon, I was made to be a weapon, I—"
"Stop that right now," says Joel firmly. "You are a person, and you just saved someone from being killed. It was self-defense, not mindless."
Jimmy almost laughs, because to some extent, it was mindless. He acted entirely on instinct, following the training Xornoth had given him, whether or not it was self-defense.
He doesn't like hurting people.
He never wanted to go back to being a villain.
It's not even that he's upset about killing that specific man. Screw that man, he tried to kill his boyfriend.
He's really just afraid that now that he's killed one person, he'll keep doing it. It isn’t like anyone can stop him. Nobody can stop him, not even himself, and he wouldn’t even care if his current state has anything to say about it.
"TJ," Gem says carefully, "why did you kill that man?"
Jimmy frowns. Why? "To protect Major."
"Do you have any desire to kill people outside of defense?"
Does he?
He's never had the desire to kill.
Not even when he was getting rewarded for it. Killing was something he did to survive, to escape severe punishment, or accidentally.
And here, he killed to protect. To save his boyfriend. He didn't get any satisfaction out of it. He certainly didn't enjoy it. He doesn't want to do it again.
That cuts through the foggy panic in his mind, the fear that he might keep going, that he wouldn’t be able to stop himself.
"No," he says, then stronger, "no. I never want to kill. I hate it. I only do it when I have to."
Joel lets out a breath of relief. "Thank goodness. Okay, next issue. You and Major clearly aren't safe here. Do you want to try to stick it out, or should we start moving you two as soon as possible?"
Jimmy hadn't even thought about it.
Of course they aren't safe here—he hadn't been safe alone, when Scott was kidnapped and he had to be moved to the safehouse. Why did he think that things would magically change just because Scott was here? Every villain in the city knows where they live. The rest of the gang that kidnapped Scott could show up on their doorstep at any time, even more angry than before.
Anyone could show up at any time.
Jimmy doesn't feel as secure as he used to feel, surrounded by superheroes as they are.
"We'll move," Jimmy decides. "As soon as Major is back, we're moving. It just isn't safe here."
They’ll move.
Then he’ll deal with this numbness.
-
"Hey!" Jimmy calls, running into the kitchen. "No! You aren't allowed to lift anything more than ten pounds, put that down!"
Scott sighs with an over-dramatic roll of his eyes, sets the box back on the counter. "It's not that heavy. And it doesn't even hurt right now."
"Just because it doesn't hurt doesn't mean it isn't injured, Mister," Jimmy tells him. "You don't want to pull out your stitches."
"You haven't let me help at all. Pearl already handled the actual heavy stuff, let me do something."
Jimmy shakes his head and picks up the box. "That's your own fault for getting stabbed right before we moved."
"We're moving because I got stabbed," Scott points out. "It's not like any of this was planned."
"You should have thought about that before you got stabbed, then."
Scott groans, then reluctantly laughs. "I guess I should have. Can I at least drive?"
Jimmy lets out a very put-upon sigh. "I suppose, since I don't have a driver's license, you can be allowed to drive. But only if you behave yourself."
Scott giggles again. "You're adorable," he says fondly. "You know I'm the Primary Protector of the city, right? I don't think you'd be able to stop me."
"And I killed a man last week," counters Jimmy. "I don't think you want to be on my bad side."
"Oh," Scott says after a moment. "Are we joking about this now?"
Jimmy shrugs. "We're in the laugh-or-cry stage. I'm trying to laugh about it right now."
Scott looks at him. Really, truly, looks at him.
Then he laughs. Just a little bit, but still a laugh.
"I love you," he says. "I'll help you hide the body next time."
Jimmy laughs a little, too, but Scott pauses.
"There . . . isn't going to be a next time, right?" he asks uncertainly.
"Oh, absolutely not. Not unless it's entirely necessary."
Scott nods several times. "Good," he says. “Yep. Cool.”
Jimmy turns back toward the door, box in his arms, and waits until he’s out of the house to huff, shaking his head (though a smile plays on his lips).
They’re okay.
He pushes away the numb feeling that threatens to seep into his brain and thinks and remembers and knows that they’re okay.
That’s good enough for him.
#empires smp#empires smp fanfic#jimmy solidarity#scott smajor#flower husbands#mas writes#empires superpowers au#esh au#this one is a fun one ngl#like it sounds angsty on the tin but it really isn't that bad#anyways shout out to jimmy for working a from-home customer service job during this fic#he has worse problems than whatever this is. and those problems are ppl yelling at him on the phone :(#ummmmmmmm enjoy#lmk what yall think#love you guys
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📣 The US has started back sending out free Covid-19 rapid tests as of September 25th, 2023:
Every U.S. household may place an order to receive four free COVID-19 rapid tests delivered directly to your home.
It's a shame they even suspended this service to begin with back in May, but I think they needed to fuck around and find out first before realizing how necessary the service actually is.
Go get yourself some free at-home Covid-19 tests US folks!
#covid tests#covid#covid pandemic#covid isn't over#covid is airborne#covid awareness#i think what peeves me about this is just them slipping this back in so casually#as if they didn't make a really bad decision ending it to begin with? impacting so many people who can't afford testing?#no apology for ending it so prematurely? no public declaration as to why exactly they're starting this back now?#like thank you for starting back this service. don't think i forgot though.#link(s) provided
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shout out object shows with canon queer ships. I'm talking on screen kiss or even just verbal confirmation. all things considered it's a bit strange you don't really see them that much when you think about how gay everyone here is. I love you ii but c2bc did what you didn't and I think that's actually really nice.
#girl makes claims when there's 1 more ep for ii and many more for c2bc. police arrest her.#inanimate insanity#ii#osc#silver's mental breakdown#c2bc#c2bc spoilers#do we do that here or what#fireball c2bc#pound c2bc#i always misread his tag as pound cake. i am but a fool#also is firepound mildly fanbrush coded ir am i kind of losing it. it's someone and pb. because fireball is very pb coded. inspired? somethi#ng. also c2bc totally takes influences from ii and we all noticed that right. it's not a bad thing. ii is my favorite show. but like. “im nb#.“ ik there was like no other way to say it but that's exactly what pb says in s3. ”he wants to make a boys club!“ ”im nb.“ ”i mean... a no#girls club!!!!“ i think i lile c2bc but im bot 100% sure? i saw someone comment that all the chars are likeable but like. speaker isn't!! st#op bullying my girl corky!! she's literally not that bad! don't get me started on beerkeg. i dont feel bad that he was manipped bcus like. d#ude she said no. leave ger alone#!!#i dont feel bad for him at all snd even cheered when princess hat (?) started using him even though it was not the greatest move and not sup#er healthy. s2's cast is still mych better though. justice for portal though!!!!!!! gone too soon. i kinda shipped. princess hat (?) and tap#e measure in s1 btw i never told anyone that but I did think it. service bell is like a taco i like mych less. and shout out firepound and m#mirror book. pretty crazy how gay objects can just live in my head and i let them do that. anyways sorry for writing a whole nother post in#the tags i just haven't shared my thoughts yet and wanted to lol.#i like it i think#firepound#<- oh hey look gay people
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Someone put Eddsworld on Suicide Watch
#cause why are they shooting themselves in the foot like this..#IDK IF THIS IS REAL OR IF IM MISSING ANYTHING#got this on twitter so do correct me if im mistaken or anything#But anyways I aint never seen a crew that hates the very fans who keep their series alive so much#And its not even merch#Fym fan dubs and reanimateds aren’t allowed either#Guys at this point do not be surprised if they try making an Eddsworld TV Series on a medicore streaming service that flops so fucking bad#Because this is getting crazyyyy#eddsworld#I might delete this later#idkk#idk what im saying here
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tuesday again 11/12/2024
this one's a bit short. i am now thirty and still unemployed (ten months this week) ://// if you enjoy the tuesdayposts and are not maxed out on your charitable donations for other causes (american healthcare access, healthcare access in other places, war relief, any number of other good causes) i am going to be $300 short for december rent. here is my paypal.
listening
listening to a lot of pete seeger, for my health. there are about one zillion recordings of Old Man Atom, all ever so slightly different. it starts off as a perky gee-whiz-science! tune and continues frog marching the listener along in an increasingly jaunty manner. it's
Then the cartel crowd put on a show To turn back the clock on the UNO To get a corner on atoms and maybe extinguish Every darned atom that can't speak English Down with foreign-born atoms! America for American atoms! I hold this truth to be self-evident That all men may be cremated equal!
youtube
it's very depressing to listen to early anti-nuclear protest songs and realize they hold even more true today! song's a bop tho!
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reading
the feds nabbed someone allegedly related to the semi-dire Snowflake data leaks that have been ongoing throughout the year (Santander Bank, AT&T, Ticket Master, Neiman Marcus, etc).
this guy has been a real thorn in krebs' side for a year or so and participates in some of the worst corners of the internet, which explains the adversarial nature of the writeup. i read through the whole thing going "yeah this guy is Very annoying but why is krebs so mad at him" and then got to the bottom section about other activities. italicized OH moment in real life but bad.
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watching
continuing noirvember with The Maltese Falcon (1941, dir. Huston).
The Maltese Falcon is a 1941 American film noir in which a San Francisco private detective deals with three unscrupulous adventurers, all seeking a jewel-encrusted falcon statuette.[3] Written and directed by John Huston[3] in his directorial debut, the film was based on the 1930 novel The Maltese Falcon by Dashiell Hammett and is a remake of the 1931 film of the same name.[4][5][6] It stars Humphrey Bogart as private investigator Sam Spade, Mary Astor as his femme fatale client, and as villains Peter Lorre and Sydney Greenstreet.
i have two really snotty thoughts to get out of my brain: the modern letterboxed reviews like "i liked this but the homophobia ruined it" weak. all of you are WEAK.
and
i appreciate the work of the tumblrinas trying to queer this story in a more 2020s friendly way. however. sam spade canonically calls someone a slur for using cologne that he deems too feminine. the noir detective series you want is Philip Marlowe, who is at least homophobic in interesting and less physically violent ways.
anyway! gorgeous gorgeous movie. mary astor goes toe to fucking toe with bogey in every scene. a very frantic and frightened woman who is one jump ahead of the pathway crumbling behind her at all times. but she takes the jump and makes it! every time! except for the most important one!!!
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playing
having a normal one with 12 hours of powerwash simulator
new genshin update rapidly approacheth. there's a lot happening in this screenshot. accidentally careened right past this npc, with one bullet for the poor low-level slime in the background, floaty blue pet in tow. the npc wanted me to deliver something to her sister who is visible under the big tree in the background. i love early area spaghetti code.
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making
deep cleaned my house again bc i had people over for my birthday, which was a very lovely and very drunk evening of star wars on in the background while we played trivia. not how i expected to enter my thirties! i am not in the life circumstances i expected to be in my thirties, i do not have the life i expected to have in my thirties, etc. feeling a little maudlin and need to do crafts about it but also all the crafts in my home are not quite right!
#feeling Weird and Bad about ebegging again. everyone has been so so so lovely since i moved and started having financial crises#one day i will have a job again. god only fucking knows what day that will be#i have like. accepted im going to need to work in person and get covid again but im really angling for like. office jobs.#and not food service#tuesday again#tuesday again no problem#Youtube
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Some years ago many of us believed Musk was some kind of genius who'll take us all to Mars.
A lot of us believed that buying Tesla cars would be one of the most effective solution to crimate crisis.
Some of us also thought that AI would be a massive benefit to humanity or at least some sort of harmless hobby.
Oh. We were so wrong!
Elon Musk’s disdain for the Democratic Party was never subtle, but in recent weeks his commentary on the upcoming US presidential election and his attacks against Vice President Kamala Harris have intensified, aided by a crude use of burgeoning artificial intelligence technology, with the help of the new supercomputer dubbed Colossus he bought for his latest artificial intelligence startup, xAI, founded in 2023!
Musk posted an AI-generated image on Twitter/X that depicted Harris as a communist, wearing a red uniform complete with hammer and sickle emblazoned hat and captioned the image with the false assertion, “Kamala vows to be a communist dictator on day one. Can you believe she wears that outfit!?”
The image, which appeared to violate Twitter/X’s policy on manipulated content, resembled an AI-generated image posted by Trump last month during the Democratic National Convention, envisioning Harris addressing a crowd under communist symbols.
Fan-generated AI images have also become the Republican candidate’s latest obsession.
AI images of Trump looking defiant now dominate right-wing social media platforms and accounts and have featured heavily in this election campaign, even used, by Trump and Musk to spread blatant lies and misinformation to their followers mainly on Twitter/X.
Musk’s post came a day after he shared another post with a screenshot suggesting that only “high status males” should be able to participate in government because women (and men with “low testosterone”) are not capable of critical thought. Musk posted it to his 196 million followers with the comment, “interesting observation.”
However, this would exclude a big part of Trump electors and Musk fans, since they actually believed to their lies and persevere in their false perception of reality and society.
Elon Musk is a child of Apartheid. He wasn’t radicalized, he was cultivated. View all his actions through that lense and it all makes sense.
Remember: Elon Musk said Bezos' ex-wife, MacKenzie Scott is destroying western civilization by donating billions to charities for women, minorities and marginalized groups, so in response she doubled her donations.
Elon Musk just unmasked himself as the tech world's poster boy for fascism, openly endorsing a dystopian vision where only "high-status males" rule. His pathetic attempt to masquerade as a free speech advocate crumbles, revealing a dangerous elitist who sneers at democracy and equality.
Some links: X - X
#vavuskapakage#kamala harris#vote kamala#kamala 2024#kamala for president#elon musk#fuck elon musk#fuck elongated muskrat#what the fuck#elon musk is a fraud#elon musk is an idiot#elon musk is a moron#elon musk is an asshole#all my homies hate ai#all my homies hate elon musk#ai is not art#ai is theft#ai is stupid#ai is a plague#ai is bad#ai is bullshit#tesla cars#tesla cybertruck#tesla is infamous in the car industry for absolutely terrible customer service
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to pass as. to qualify as. to be as. to love as a human being
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#nothing there#eye strain#just in case. sorry...#i remember the first time i messed up and my agent (jake) got a bad work result. it was on day 46 the mem rep time i went back on day 47#bc i wasnt happy with the death count. since i went in to the mechanics blind. i the other works were fine and in theory the stats wouldve#been able to be fine. but then jake got a bad work result and i stood stunned for a bit just listening. i kept sayimg to myself it would be#fine and to just keep working on nothing there. but i felt too guilty and reset...#for the piece itself i wanted to be harder to look at. a lot to process and sort out but also the clash of colors as well#the draw of the eye at least for me when testing it was towards the chest than the face. inability to look at the face as a concept#that and stare at what isnt quite human. reminds me of the instant panic mechanic...#would this count for the agent tag?.. uhm.. sure . i think.#lobotomy corp agent#theyre not quite an original character. maybe ill write for them actually later but theyre just an agent for now#thank you for your service jake.....
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Day 4
Hisui Ingo for no other reason that I think he is neat
#pokemon legends arceus#warden ingo#i wonder what happens to him and rei after the game ending#i dont think they come back#or at least in a while#ingo has been in hisui for years#i think at least like 10 years?#but maybe with rei there they can come back#but why was ingo there in the first place?#arceus secret reasons? bad luck? fan service?
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