#well i answered my question i think fuck
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How do yall like.. draw i guess damn
#well i answered my question i think fuck#this is hard i knkw u gotta work at it i know we are our own worst critics i know#sometimes i just need to whine#i used to be able to draw and forgot everytbing its not lif#ke riding a bike ok it isnt lmao and now its like my hands are the wrong size drawing feels weird and just different#i cant even draw a circle right now i lost all my muscle memory MUSCLE MEMORY IS ALL I HAVE#Yap yap yap
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so after boots, what other hsr characters do you like?
hm. well. hmmmm. ahhh.. uhhhhhhhhhhh
#sal.asks#it's cowboy all the way down baby !!!!!#this is only kind of a joke answer lol. i legitimately lost 90% of my interest in other characters once i saw leaks abt him LOL#and it's only gone downhill from there#...he should have a ship name like that. uphill or downhill. theres a joke there#otherwise i am a big ratio fan. second funniest character in the whole cast#bro is so done with EVERYBODY'S shit#i have to respect his dedication to not giving a fuck about what anybody thinks about him lol#(but also there's clearly something else going on underneath that?? WHAT is going on in his brain. i wanna study him like a bug)#homie is here for one purpose and that is EDUCATION. he's so funny#i wrote like 5k words of a fic for him with an oc. putting him in a box and shaking it around#like that pear wiggler gif. you know the one#i am also a screwllum lover 💝 silly man. deeply charming. also incredibly funny just in a subtle way#i am a moderate dh enjoyer as well bc that boy is slaving away in the angst mines#and also. dragon. insane about his aesthetic#theres so much beautiful merch for him. i saw a gold-lined pin of his dragon and dear godddddddd#if i werent broke from the holidays it would be MINEEEEEEEEE#i was geared up to be obsessed with aven (i think i have a supernatural sense for when backstories are going to be interesting)#but then i saw the bh leaks and every other thought fled my brain LOLLL#anyway yeah i know it's deeply unusual to only post about one character for these sorts of games lol#so the question is reasonable#the answer is just not that exciting unfortunately 😭
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personally I think the best thing that the joker sequel did for me was expose the exact degree to which how much of internet/public criticism is not based on genuine analysis of the content using social and cultural resources to support an actual argument but is actually adult children whining because someone took their batman toys and put them up on a high shelf for once and they, as a consumer, feel like they're entitled to throw a tantrum about it
#one of those 'if everyone's a critic no one will be' kind of situations#like every day I have to see 30 youtube thumbnails saying 'joker 2 bad' and then they say 'this scene was bad' and the only evidence they#give for their reasoning on it is 'it didn't make sense' and I want to turn into my english teacher and give reading comprehension question#like. if something doesn't make sense then why not examine the deeper reasoning that led you to that conclusion? why not then also entertai#the circumstances in which the situation would be plausible? you know? find some actual answers? but that is too much to ask of people#truly the gulf between a really well educated opinion analyzing the actual content rather than knee-jerking and saying 'I don't like it' is#far and fucking wide. I literally have only found ONE video essay that actually does a decent job talking about theme and the cohesion#between the two movies about the gulf between reality and fantasy which I thought was REALLY a good and thoughtful take on it all#but the rest of them are just like 'OOOOH MOVIE BAD MOVIE SO BAD'#like. you can't just say that!!! I know it's the internet and it's edged your ego enough to make you think you can#but some of us would like you to unpack your actual reasoning. but you do not have the capacity for that. clearly#go back to ninth grade for god's sake like this is a really basic skill for actually analyzing narrative and film and you do not have it#joker#folie a deux#joker 2#arthur fleck
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I started in DC by reading fanfics, but as I began to read actual comics, I started to be unable to read the actual fanfic that got me into it in the first place because it's so out of character.
But there are still some stories that I love to read because I love the found family trope so much, even if it isn't really accurate to the source material.
As a comics purist (sometimes), are there tropes that you like enough that you'll still enjoy a fic even if it's not accurate to canon?
oh my god this is SUCH a fun question. bc while i started with the comics, there were certain characters and/or character dynamics where i was exposed to the fanon before the canon (just bc it's hard to read everything when you start out just to read some fanfic) and so i've definitely experienced the fanon to canon transition. (*especially* with Jason Todd. i had only read 80s/90s stuff where he was already dead or the New-52 bc that was on-going when i got into comics and man. the fanon misunderstandings i had about him before i got frustrated and sat down to read all his pre-Flashpoint stuff were absolutely bonkers.) and aside from that, whilst i tend to prefer canon over fanon, i'm not past giving fanon its flowers for occasionally having really interesting insights. occasionally. so some of my fanon "guilty pleasure" tropes would probably be
Morally Grey Tim Drake - this is one where if you try to back it up with canon, i *will* get salty about it. of everyone in the Batfam aside from maybe Bruce and Cass, Tim has the *most* black and white morals. often his internal conflicts are routed in such an inability to compromise his moral views and it can cause him to clash with other characters. he's *very* stiff and rigid in his beliefs and is *rare* to compromise in even the smallest ways. i mean, DC has repeatedly used Tim Drake of Tomorrow/Savior/Gun Batman!Tim for a reason. it's to demonstrate that of everyone, Tim *cannot* have his morals compromised. there's no grey area for him. he's zero or a hundred, so if he tips over the edge of "too far" he tips *all the way*, and doing so is one of his worst fears, how he could go "too far" if he let himself. a couple panels out of context from Red Robin (2009) (which was a grief spiral for Tim to begin with) don't change that. now that said. if it's done *right*, i sort of love Tim being morally grey in fanfic. it takes a specific flavor for me, and it's incredibly important to include that mental spiral along with it, of him struggling to justify it. i don't have any interest in "Tim Drake is loosy goosy with Bruce's morals and has the highest kill count and no one knows teehee" bc it doesn't play with the interesting parts of making Tim morally grey, which are fracturing his psyche. but all in all, i think it's fun to put Tim in a morally grey area and i will read it in fanfic and i enjoy writing it a lot
Joker Junior!Tim Drake - i've not written it on this account (yet) but on my main ao3 account one of my biggest fics surrounds this concept. this is one of those "well *technically* it's canon but only in a specific very divorced from the comics universe and would not work at all in the main timeline" so, i categorize it as fanon in that 95% of fics exploring the concept are not doing so within the Batman Beyond universe, but the main timeline. i just love it. I'll take any excuse to whump Tim, but this concept is so fun. psychologically breaking Tim will always be my favorite pastime. there are so many ways to explore the long-term effects this could have on him, how it could affect the Batfam. i'm not a fan of it being used as a "gotcha" to Jason or Babs' trauma with the Joker to paint Tim as the Ultimate Victim, but it is fun to see how their relationships would be affected by being mutual victims of him. (i have a vague JayTim idea where TIm fully retires from being Robin after being Joker Junior and killing the Joker, making Steph Robin for most of his typical Robin era and Jason still tracks him down out of curiosity bc he wants to know what happened and all. very underbaked but i've got thoughts.)
Renegade/Apprentice of Slade!Dick Grayson - this is another one where yes, this happened *sort of* in canon, but i highly doubt most people writing Renegate!Dick have read or are actually pulling from Nightwing: Renegade. it's just an exploration fo the concept fo Dick being Slade's apprentice and i will always eat it up in any capacity. whether Dick grows up with Slade from a young age, or chooses Slade for whatever reason later in life. it's not anything that works in canon bc it compromises Dick morally (similar to the above with Tim) and therefore will always come across incredibly fanon in most fics. but i can't say i don't enjoy it. it's fun to make Dick a little morally fucked up and see what you can make him under Slade's tutelage.
Jason & Damian Meeting in the League -there's no world where i believe this could work in the canon comics. (maybe in the Young Justice cartoon i suppose, but even then i think it's iffy) i would go as far to say it's wildly unrealistic. i don't see a world where Ra's would let Jason anywhere *near* Damian, bc Jason was Talia's pet project that he didn't approve of. that all said, there's something very interesting about how they *could've* met and them potentially bonding during that timeframe. them being somewhat brotherly during this time because Jason sees Bruce in Damian and sort of latches onto the kid and Damian is full of wonder hearing real stories about Batman and Robin, then that getting violently ripped away by Jason leaving the League is fun to me. it's fun how that could affect them within the Batfam and all. it's super fanon to me, but i do not care. i will eat it up
Bad Dad Clark Kent/Good Dad Lex Luthor - i will admit as a late, i've been less and less kind to this particular fanon bc of everything i've argued with people about, *this* one seems the most pervasive as misunderstood fanon. i don't mind when fanon exists, my gripe is when ppl try to claim it's canon. and the *arguments* i've had over this with people who can never seem to cite an actual comic are... frustrating. but that said, i think there is something fun to this strictly in fanon. the duality of who you expect to accept Kon and who you expect to hurt him being flipped is just sort of fun for the occasional guilty pleasure fic. it can make Kon's internal conflict a bit more interesting. the same goes for the Jon favoritism from Clark, it's not a canon thing (and i rlly wish ppl understood how complicated the timeline of Kon and Jon is and any distance from Clark toward Kon isn't malice, it's that Kon is from a timeline that Clark does not remember in the current canon so Clark just straight up doesn't know the poor kid.) but it's sort of fun to give Kon that complex of being overlooked and forgotten sometimes. making Kon just a *bit* more Luthor than Kent will *always* appeal to me in fanfic, especially if he *knows* it's wrong but craves approval from anyone who will give it.
Good Dad Bruce Wayne - i'll die on the hill Bruce is canonically a shitty father. maybe not to the extreme some people write him as, but he's not great at it. that said, i enjoy it in fanfiction. sometimes, i just want silly fluff or hurt/comfort where Bruce finally gets it right and manages to comfort whatever Batkid is in the fic. one of my favorite fics of all time is hinged on Bruce being a good dad, so i think it's just fun to explore how good the relationships *could* be, if Bruce was slightly less of an asshole. i usually prefer him as an asshole, but there are times i want low stakes nonsense.
Gotham Rogues Having Soft Spots for Robin(s) - just about every Rogue in Gotham has done something absolutely irredeemable, and most of them don't like or care about anyone in the Batfamily. but if there's a fic where one of the Robins inexplicably is sort of close with a Rogue and they have a cute silly relationship out of it? I'll eat it up i fear. Steph and the Riddler are besties? I'll believe it. Tim and Scarecrow get along pretty well? give me ten of these. Rogues protecting Robins just hits a spot. the unexpected nature of the relationship, as well as the fact they see each other regularly, can make a lot of good fodder.
#necrotic answerings#canon vs fanon#batfanon#batfamily#I was *going* to include “Janet and Jack Drake are bad parents”#then realized I don't really like that fanon anymore.#but I used to go *hard* for it even knowing it wasn't canon. it was all projection but still#nowadays I think the tragedy of Tim losing his parents the way he did is *far* worse if they loved him and were good to him.#I'm so serious about the Kon thing i've had *nasty* arguments where ppl got so rude to me telling me to “Google it”#like listen I get it. kon's canon backstory is currently difficult to understand#the timeline of the superboy mantle is a little confusing and most people have not read young justice (2019)#so for fanon it's far easier to simplify it as “clark just kinda sucks to kon” and i enjoy that#but the canon is also fun. it's fun when you consider how fucked up it is most people don't remember kon#and the timeline he remembers doesn't exist anymore.#also technically since they never killed off new-52!superboy on page there could be two superboys/kon-els running around rn. who knows.#i like to believe there is bc it's funny.#i have wanted to write a new-52!konkon/tim/kon sandwich#with the “is it selfcest or not” question#bc new-52!kon wasn't a clone of clark and lex.#so like. he's arguably a different character just sharing the name kon-el for some reason#also on the nightwing: renegade thing i know *damn* well most fanon-only fans haven't read it (no shade in that)#bc the fanon crowd despises devin grayson and she wrote it.#one day i'll write a meta about fandom treatment of devin grayson trust me.#this question was SO fun#i feel like i should have more answers?#if you'd asked me like six months ago this list would be three times as long#but the more i exist in this fandom somehow the saltier i get idk what's happening#so now i'm more and more attached to canon#but i will never begrudge someone for liking fanon#like i said my issue with it is the confusion of what is canon
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i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .
#hhhhHHHGHGHHHHHH#jay screams into the void#(deeply personal rant incoming feel free to ignore)#a friend of mine has just been undiagnosed with bpd which . lovely for them but it sure as fuck invites a Lot of questions#suddenly a great deal of previous shitty behaviour that was excused on the basis of bpd has a lot more to answer for#(obligatory I Know BPD Isn't An Excuse To Treat People Like Shit . im aware . i have bpd myself and i have v high standards re my behaviour)#(however allowances were made bc they were unmedicated & out of therapy through no fault of their own)#(and our whole group has enough experience with untreated mental illness to understand that it can make u a bitch sometimes)#but yeah no there have been a LOT of instances of b&w thinking + manipulation + unfair judgement + high emotion + snap reactions#and every situation Could be explained by untreated bpd and the bad times have never been prolonged or often enough to outweigh the good#but Hoo Boy if that wasn't bpd then what the FUCK was it#like either the new psychiatrist is wrong (possible but i seem to be the only one questioning it) or they're just Like That#and again . not enough to outweigh their numerous positive and loveable traits#but the whole group has been destabilised on a number of occasions due to their actions during a bad spell#and i'm really not sure Any Other Explanation is enough to justify that#ah well . this seems like the kind of thing that will eventually come up during a sleepover heart to heart#but rn i'm stuck in a bubble of MAJOR rsd & brainfuck abt it . which is unfortunate bc now is exactly the time i Don't need brainfuck#anyways ✨ goodnight tumblrinas i am . kind of hoping nobody read this bc i fear i sound like a bitch#i am genuinely happy for their undiagnosis it seems to have put many things into perspective for them & theyre v happy about it#i'm just . uncomfy w some aspects of it that i have only been halfway brave enough to discuss with them personally#That's One To Bring Up With My Therapist In A Few Weeks#Bit Of A Shame I'm No Longer In Therapy And Now Have Only 2 Quarterly Reviews Left Before I'm Discharged From The Service
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/50868af684658e59134fc0be6e890019/a256d6607746e991-ce/s540x810/b533cd7544604c617cfc7767ac3602ad74c466f9.jpg)
The Face™️ feat. Mikey~🎃
#mikey fucking way saturday#i totally forgot about my drs appt and hopped on the video#got questioned as to the state of my mental health#I LIVE ON TUMBLR SCREAMING ABOUT FRANK IERO HOW DO YOU THINK IT IS#jk it’s good i’m fine#she didn’t like my ‘well i’m alive’ answer so much#my therapist thinks it funny….this dr not so much if#frnkiebby#frank iero#mikey way#mikey fucking way#mikey way saturday#mcr#frnkiero#mcrmy#mcr5#frnkie#my chemical romance#my chem
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3c2aec8fe83052046315b3353ddfef8f/855b37100d0cbdbc-c3/s540x810/37c5f4e87d860aeeeed07432517e3cf2ac2f7884.jpg)
weird ad i just got while looking up whether acetaminophen or ibuprofen is better for headaches
#idk i just think these types of ads r interesting. like someone made that. and then paid for the ad service. just to promote what is#presumably some type of scam website#like. the optical illusion to catch ur eye. the use of both childhood trauma and procrastination as clickbait buzzwords#the face in the optical illusion. the way the text is broken up that gives it strange almost comedic pacing#the fact that its entirely black and white. dare i say its borderline aesthetically pleasing#sorry for overanalyzing this ad like its art. but also everything is art. even weird scam ads#also the answer to my question was acetaminophen. in case anyone was wondering. well at least according to the 1 website i looked at#moss.txt#weirdcore#webcore#<- fuck it i'll throw some aesthetic tags on this. is there anyone else who appreciates the aesthetic of odd web ads or is it just me
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unfortunately i have the kind of autism that makes people have to explain things to me/i have to bounce my ideas around with people who know things before thoughts become anything for me
#when i did cape literature it was the first time i had actually read shakespeare in its like. original english dialect#and i would read the play on my own at home‚ not understand anything much less connect themes or anything#then go to school and sit in class while we read it and it would feel like i was reading it for the first time#much of my existing is masking like. pretending i know things i think i'm fr stupid at heart#<- i got away with a lot of this at school like i never spoke in patois i never wore braids my parents were still super helicopter-y#so i was generally unaware of like. school gossip or jamaican pop culture because at first i didn't have a phone and then later on#i straight up stopped caring about pretending to care about that stuff#i was pretty quiet but at the same time i had a lot of friends but didn't have a friend group etc etc#i Appeared like the perfect student so i got away w cheating on tests or not knowing stuff etc etc#especially towards the end of highschool when my depression got really bad and my overall average was in the 60s#very often i would submit assignments and tests thinking i got my point across perfectly or answered questions right according#to what i studied then id get the grades and commentary back and i fucking failed or something#so now whenever my profs or people in fandom r like you're so smart or you articulate your works very well i'm like What the fuck thank you#and it imprints in my brain forever because this is new to me#jamaican academia and jamaica in general is like so much about following roles than it is being a person#and when you're neglected and outcast and autistic it becomes impossible to be jamaican at all#and now people both here (jamaica) and in ghe us ask me shit like “wait you were born and puved in jamaica your whole life??”#it's. anyway#this post was originally about how i'm actually kind of stupid#*
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i love that my therapist was like . “bitch, lie more”
#i give way too much access to myself to people who don't respect it#and i need to be more protective of my time and energy and vulnerability.#she’s like. if you get a phone call you don’t wanna answer. if you’re in a conversation you don’t wanna continue to be in. LIE.#say you need to go cuz you have plans. pretend you’re in the middle of something. fake an incoming phone call.#if you need to spend an entire day in bed and someone thinks that means you’re available. say you’re running errands all day instead!#if you don’t want to answer a question. you actually have to go pee really bad all of a sudden!#the autism makes this so so so hard for me. i do not think well on my feet. but i need to like.#pre-load some of these excuses into my vocabulary and my toolbox.#cuz my mom & my stepmom both run me the fuck over if given more than very controlled allotted access to me.#and i cannot keep living like that.#izzy.txt
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it's actually so stupid
#vent in tags sorry about this#like.#fuck im so mad#like being in fandoms for me feels like#im on the floor with everyone playing toys right. having a great time#and everyone has blocks#i look around and everyone is assembling structures with their blocks and its so cool!! this is so fun#but i dont do anything with my blocks. they dont make sense. i can't comprehend how to stack them on top of each other.#and its fine until im reminded that i dont have a tower of blocks#i dont know#like fuck im so fucking mad purely at myself#that i cant analyze media in the way i see people do. that i dont have headcanons. that i dont have ocs as well#its so fucking frustrating#and i know i know i don't have to do any of that and it's okay ! and maybe it will come with time !#but i want that i want to stack my fucking blocks!#and its been like- four years or so of this same shit im so MAD#it doesnt come!!#and yes i have ocs but do i do shit with them?#can i answer a simple question about any one of them?#fuck no#i regularly cry or almost cry about this im so sick of it#um. kouka if youre reading this i dont mind your ask or anything genuinely im happy for interaction hello yay#yeah sorry guys i dont think ive ever made a tumblr ventpost i just got reallyy upset#live kaard reaction
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>:(((( I have a phonecall today that I have to answer, and ofc some other random phone call came in and I answered bc thought it was that. >:((( it wasn’t and now today’s total is going to be 2 phone calls. this is my nightmare
#it was some customer review thing idk#I can’t hear ppl to well on the phone idk why#asked my email & address and like I’m not giving those on the phone to some random bc like idk if that actually was legit#so I had a real awkward tinfoil-hat question of ’’so… what’s this for exactly?’’ and ugh#but he didn’t ask those again and if he would have I think I would’ve just hung up the phone#I did google that phonenumber now and it was a legit one and so I’m hella embarrassed now :D super!!#I’ve become way too wary of phonecalls bc like 90% of them are scam attempts#so I avoid saying my name or too clear yes/no and it’s like a fucking mindgame answering phonecalls#february 2024#2024
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I hate when something looks like it would be RIGHT up your alley and the cast is pretty stacked, but there's one person in said cast who is just. Genuinely a horrible human being.
#and then for the sake of. not giving that one person my time or attention or anything. I see no way beyond just not watching the thing#OBVIOUSLY the focus should be the people who were hurt by said horrible human being#that IS in fact the important consideration here#I guess this is more...really just the fact that it happens so often?#because there are COUNTLESS examples to draw from of this particular type of Horrible Behavior and similar variations of it#like the entertainment industry is just. SO bad.#and that makes it unsafe for the people WHO ARE LITERALLY JUST TRYING TO MAKE ART#(and tangentially makes it harder for other people to engage with that art or acknowledge the work those other Not-Horrible people#put in. like congratulations you did direct and lasting harm to others. which in and of itself is a point of condemnation--the MOST#IMPORTANT point of condemnation. and then ON TOP OF that. extraneously. to add insult to injury. you secondhand-ruined#the experience of other people partaking in the sharing of and engagement with art.)#'well mc13 you could just watch it anyway it doesn't have to be done through streaming'#maybe other people could do that but I personally cannot handle engaging with this at all. it would stress me out and sicken me to#the point where there wouldn't be anything good to come out of watching it. I PERSONALLY cannot make peace with that.#I have...a LOT of thoughts on the idea of 'separating art from artist' and maybe I'll scream about them someday. but I do recognize that#there IS some nuance to the discussion when it comes to like...idk. people who have been kicked out of a project and then replaced once#their behavior came to light. or artists who are dead and cannot gain any kind of benefit from people engaging with their work anymore.#and looking at things considering the severity of the behavior in question and whether it seems like reformative justice is possible#like I do think there are things to be talked about. I agree there can't be One Magic Answer For All Cases Ever.#but the fact of the matter is...the hard line for what's actually unacceptable is...virtually nonexistent. and that shouldn't be the case.#this is past MY hard line. which yes does make it inconvenient in the sense of 'I cannot engage with a thing that sounds interesting' but#mostly I am just reminded over and over again of how insidious this industry is and how easily people get fucked up by it and it just...#it's so bleak. I don't want people to suffer when they're trying to make art. I don't want people to be unsafe. I remember when *I* was#experiencing those things and everyone around me was experiencing those things. I do not want ANYONE else to have to#go through that. EVER.#(<-this isn't like. COMPLETELY related to my previous post. I'm trying to organize my watchlist and I'm gonna. have to make some changes.)
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SURPRISE ATTACK!!!
Coming in to get you!! and remind you how cool you are, you make the best outfit designs and have such funny and interesting ideas and the way you draw everybody is super pretty!! :D
waaaaa T T thank you!!!!
Ur the coolest <3
#I'm glad you like the designs!#I got an ask that made me overthink and now I feel a bit pressured..#takes the fun out of things a bit#(it was well meaning! just my fucked up brain lol)#it feels less exciting now#and I was so happy yesterday#moodswings T_T#I think If I push through and make stuff I like I can get back into it#it also may be the fact that I pumped out sm stuff yesterday and expecting to get back into that perfect rhythm is just gonna end badly#I'm trying to stay positive tho!!#And I shouldn't analyse my moods#That's too much thinking#I need to stop and draw floofy bois instead!!#Sorry abt the rant#Buttttt#If you do have questions abt the au#Or thoughts#That would help I think#Thank you for the ask#Reminds me I'm not alone <3#answered asks#Charlie Somegrumpynerd
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Sorry if this might be a rude question but why don’t you just make a seperate account for your nsfw fics?
not rude, it's a valid question! tbh it's a combination of a couple reasons.
i started posting anonymous dead dove batcest fics long before i had the balls to make a tumblr. at first i was content to just leave them unassociated with each other because i didn't really care about them being tied to me. i made this blog to actually show solidarity to my partner who wanted to make a sideblog for Sandman comic stuff so we could cheerlead each other and be brave together, since i've wanted to make a batcest sideblog but i've been nervous about actually having to get it going. (mal ik you're reading this go be brave and actually make your blog so i can cheerlead you damnit-) only did it dawn on me then that i should probably mention the fics i've written on the blog after like, three of them were posted anonymously. and it would've annoyed me to have half of them anonymous and half of them not, because notifications for them would've gone in different places. i could go back and take my fics off anon if i wanted to, but i can't switch the account they're on without taking them down entirely and that'd fuck over people who have them bookmarked already.
which, ties into my second reason, if i made an entire second ao3 account it'd be harder for me to see notifications, reply to stuff, and post things for both accounts because i'd have to constantly switch. and honestly i'd be terrified of accidentally posting on the wrong one on a brain fog day. posting fics is always the most tedious part of writing them for me lol. it's easier for me to stay logged into one account and have all of my stuff in one place for me and just use the anonymous collection when i feel like it. if ao3 pseuds worked like tumblr blogs, where you can't see all my side blogs but i can, i would've used pseuds, but since you can see all pseuds on an ao3, i felt it was a moot point.
and the last reason is i just feel more comfortable being anonymous on ao3 because of the rise in anti culture. on tumblr it's very easy for me to just filter that out and find the people i want to follow and block the people i don't. i don't mind getting hate, on tumblr or on ao3. but i think, for whatever reason you want to blame it on, there's been a massive boom of antis on ao3 who are very entitled about how they read on ao3. i tag extensively, but i just feel safer from getting targeted attacks if everything i write on ao3 isn't attached to one profile. if people like a fic i wrote, want to find more i always link my tumblr in the notes, but if an anti wants to get huffy with me, they can't easily track down my other things. they definitely could if they wanted to, but being anonymous on ao3 just makes me feel more secluded, in a weird way. it's like saying "if you want you can come find me but on here i'm just a weird faceless guy throwing stuff in the void". i've used ao3's anon feature a lot, actually, i used to be a hydra trash party dumpster kid back when that was in it's prime.
i also used to be vaguely popular on a different tumblr blog and my main ao3 and while i think it'd definitely be cool if i got a decent chunk of followers on this blog too, i don't really miss having fanfiction do so well i got targetted hate on all of my fics from the same people, i had my fics stolen, etc. it was really exhausting for me. i have 120+ works on ao3, not counting what's anonymous, and that level of exposure tires me, even when i use my main ao3 to post things that aren't trashy. it's just a weird feeling knowing so many people are subscribed to you on ao3 and what if you post something they won't like because you jumped fandoms again, or you're posting something niche, or you don't think it fills enough fandom tropes to be well-liked. i used to obsessively think like that, and it made me not write the things i wanted to because i cared about numbers. and i don't want to slide back into that hole. writing on anonymous is mostly to remind myself i wrote this for me, and if other people like it, they can come find me, but i don't have to perform like that anymore. if i get a really weird fucked up idea, i can write the really weird fucked up idea. at the end of the day, just makes me more comfortable! but i get it's a super confusing set up from an outsider perspective so, i really don't mind the question, thank you for asking!!
#necrotic festerings#batcest#pro ship#necrotic answerings#tbh asking the question gave me the chance to explain it so ty!#might link this in my about me or my masterlist for ease of access#i don't want to like. overstate how big i was on an old blog bc i was not like. a celebrity by *any* means.#but i had a ship-specific blog and i was certainly a “big name fan” for that specific rarepair#and it like. took over my life when i was a teen#i look back on it fondly now but i really regret that i would obsess so heavily over numbers and what made a fic do well#my favorite fics to write were htp back then bc for htp culture writing on anon was normal since that was during the dreamwidth days#and i just. liked that veil of anonymity and i think i defaulted to that when i decided to finally start posting batcest stuff#(all of this makes me sound so old i'm only 22 i just started fandom really fucking young which i don't recommend)#and when i say one fic got big. i mean it. i have found that fic on instagram and pinterest and tiktok and even. facebook.#do you know what it's like when your fic gets reuploaded to facebook without your permission and you see what boomers think of it.#that was so mortifying.#funnily enough the boomers were actually really nice i was just shocked to find it there scrolling one day.#it was instagram that was super mean to me and traumatized my ass. man ppl dug into me for the tinest things. do not miss that.#anyway the point is#i've tasted vitality and niche fandom status(tm) and i hated both. and i just cannot do that to myself again#ergo#anon on ao3 and a blog to post my thoughts when i have them.#it's a nice system for me#i have some stuff on my main ao3 that toes the line of like. dark dead dove trash.#and i had antis get mad at me bc their fave fluffy fic was written by. gasp. a proshipper.#and yeah that soured me to existence on ao3.#getting into the rise of anti culture is a whole other discussion that'd have me going on for hours but i will shut up now.#wow this got long. i like to fucking talk don't i.
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why Was 70's design so fucking good btw? like no other era was That good with its design.
like specifically the design you think of when you think "70's," like the mustards and oranges and browns in fun geometric or complex patterns, the unique ways form was used in so many designs, even the fashion had really interesting silhouettes.
like it already used my favourite colours a Lot, but on top of that, it also just had a lot of interesting, novel ideas and it's just, idk man.
also like 70's was the disco era and disco fucking rules. and like funk was still huge too and gd i fucking love funk.
like idk man it was just an impeccable era aesthetic. literally my absolute fav.
#70's designs and 70's inspired designs and honestly just anything that makes me feel '70's' fucking rules#i know i was just goofing about how ppl always seem to love the old way things looked but 70's is just So good#also 80's is pretty good i'm a big fan of the 80's fashion and musical aesthetics#and lots of the designs like furniture and stuff in that era were Really good.#i just think 70's wins out Slighlty for me#'why was 70's design so good' adi asks then answers her own question#well i mean like my question wasn't like Why Do I like it it was 'what happened to make these the trends?' yk?#answer? probably the civil rights movement lmao#like so much of the culture and fashion popular then is heavily associated with black culture yk
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I have a question for everyone. With the post I have seen lately from the guards I need to ask this.
What about Demetri?"
What I mean by this is I seen people talk about Alec wearing a ghost face mask while my hunk of a vampire Felix wares a Pyramid head so they could have some fun with there mate if you know what I mean😉. But, What. About. Demetri? I am a visual person so I need to get a mental picture of him shirtless with some killer mask on🤭. Anyways that is all.
#Like he cannot be Micheal Myers (he could make it work actually)#(not surprised though because he could ware the most hideous thing on earth and look gorgeous still)#OH WAIT#hear me out on this#A zorro mask (mic drop)#can you imagine him with the mask and hat and and the GLOVES#fuck now I wont be able to sleep#I mean I was already lacking sleep after I reposted that pyramid head post but this is it (did I just for real answered my own question😂)#Oh well but I want to know what others think about this#demetri volturi
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