#we're all neurodivergent in this house

[tricitymonsters]

How would the boys react to a neurodivergent MC that has terrible sleep related sensory issues?

Like they need to sleep in a very specific pair of pants because if any of the skin on their thighs and knees are touching they can't sleep, the sheet has to pulled completely taught or they cant sleep, they need atleast 3 blankets to sleep even in the summer type shit?

Im totally not projecting thesse totally aren't my nightly sensory issues-

MOSTLY the boys would be pretty understanding! Mori drinks a lot, especially on weekends so he might not even be in the headspace to wonder why you need four blankets in 90 degree heat plus he like falls asleep in his jeans and shoes half the time or doesn't make it to the bed and sleeps in a pile of laundry, don't worry about him.

Amir is what I consider to be fairly neurotic with his sleep routine. Not only does he keep a tight schedule and work a hefty beauty regimen into this, if he's not in the Correct Sheets he will throw a tantrum. Where your sensory/comfort issues align, Amir is easy to deal with and very understanding of the issue. Where they compete... well... He's still very understanding but he might suggest two separate sleeping areas just so that you both have everything exactly the way you like it.

Akello is pretty laid back but his chief complaint is that he runs hot. If you can have your blankets separate from him having None (or like a light sheet) then he's easy going. He wants you both to be comfortable and doesn't find a gamut of nighttime sensory problems to be particularly onerous. Also he's creative and would be likely to find out of the box solutions to keep you both in the same bed.

[youarealwaysenough]

Contrary to what you might've been taught, cleaning is not all or nothing. It's okay to do things halfway if it means something gets done. If you have a distractible brain like mine that might mean letting your whims go where they take you. If it means something gets done, let yourself get distracted, let yourself change tasks part way through. Getting three things halfway picked up is so much better than getting nothing done.*

*There are a few things that are worse half way than not at all. Please try not to let your clothes get moldy in the washing machine, but forgive yourself if they get left in the dryer for a few days. It's okay, just getting them that far is an achievement.

[domus-fructus]

Starring...

Ray- trans woman, film score composer, the sweetest, self-medicates ADHD with lattes

Vicky G.- demi she/her, screenwriter, sassy, won "house's highest autism score" award

Sam- bi+genderfluid he/him/"whatever", actor/writer/director, manic pixie ADHD boy

Cricket- bi+genderfluid she/her, voice actor/hacker ("penetration testing" ;)/salad maker/badass/my roomie, she just realized she's probably autistic ❤️

Starke (me)- ace she/her autistic, public health/event technician/gamer, anxious af

Guest Appearances...

Titania- Sam's girlfriend, she/they, dressing goth for fun and profit, has a surprisingly lime-green car

Ry- Vicky G.'s bf, truck owner and house furniture mover, very exasperated with the rest of us

Midna- kitty!!!!! Vicky G.'s black cat, either bitchy or super sweet, will bite if you dare to fold laundry in her presence

Crow- roommate to Ry, dnd DM, never wearing a boring shirt

All nicknames of course, gotta protect the people who know where I sleep lol. I hope someone enjoys the crazy shenanigans we get up to as much as we do.

[deadcrow-donteat]

i was talking with my mom about the wierdness that is trying to communicate in our house , and i was like "we're all neurodivergent in slightly different fonts" and she said smth ab fonts that i didn't hear and didn't understand her trying to explain so i just went "i dunno what you're talking about. but i'm comic sans."

[matadorofheart]

sometimes i'm like how the fuck does ANYONE have a full time job AND hobbies AND an active social life AND the capacity to do basic self care tasks AND time to rest and then i remember neurotypical able-bodied people do in fact exist and not everyone needs to lay down for an hour upon returning home from anything

[funkle420]

i want no i NEED to be living in a cabin in a friendly community where i still get to have my own space but i get to also live with other cool ppl who are also neurodivergent and artists but my walls are thick so i can fart in peace and talk to myself and we'll all make food and art together and we'll have a big ass garden and at least 2 pets and several chickens

[cascadianights]

Officially voting we remove the trope of "awkward but very loving person everyone fucking hates and that's the joke" from television

[s0ngsandstars]

My mom just said "I don't know what normal people are like, our house runs this way."

Relatable, mom.

[unforth]

I had a day off yesterday.

And I can already practically hear the assumptions that such a statement is prompting the reader to make. Those assumptions are wrong. I don't mean I didn't work. I did, for about 8 hours. That's not at all what I mean.

I mean my wife took the kids out at 9:30, spent the night with her mom, isn't back yet the next morning.

There are things I NEED people on this website to understand about parenting. And I've talked about it before, and I'll talk about it again, because honestly the way that Tumblr as a cohort talks about parents makes me sick. Multiple polls have shown that only about 2% of people on here are parents. We're a huge minority, and we're constantly talked over, ignored, or accused of being bad parents (like, personally, I have had people reply to my comments or come on to my posts and tell me I shouldn't have my kids). In my case, being a parent means I'm almost 41, I'm married to @ramblingandpie, and our children are inching up on being 8 and 6 years old.

My entire day, and therefore my entire life, revolves around them. I'm up most mornings at 5 AM, because that's the earliest they're "allowed" to wake up, and so my brain just defaults to being awake around then - better to wake up before them, at least then I get a few minutes in the morning. Between 5 and 7, I sit with them, do my social media, work on side blogs, study Chinese. Then it's helping them get ready for school, then my wife or I or both get them on the bus, and then I work until the last possible minute, which is either when I need to go pick them up for an after school activity or when I need to go down and meet them off the bus. My afternoons are after school activities, chores such as washing the dishes and cleaning up toys, talking with them, working with them, playing with them. Their bedtime starts at 7:40, and my son gets scared if I leave before he falls asleep so I sit with him until about 8:15. As soon as he's asleep, I go fall on my face, sleep as best I can, then wake up and do it again. Overnight, it's hard to sleep deeply, because about once a week someone will wake up in the middle of the night and need help. That could be as minimal as a hug or as complex as having to completely change the bedding on a bunk bed at 2 AM while also comforting a child who is afraid they'll be in trouble, or afraid they're sick, or afraid of their nightmare, or, or, or. Further, if a child is awake, there is always noise. I usually study Chinese with two or more competing sources of noise. I read the same way. My life is loud, and active, and consists of constant interruptions.

I adore my family, and I love my children, but this is terrible for me.

I do all of this as an neurodivergent introvert. My clinical depression is at least medicated, mostly because post-partum depression after I gave birth the first time nearly drove me to suicidal in under a week (we were expecting this and were prepared, fortunately, getting help was as simple as a phone call). The constant noise and interruptions and forced socialibility are about the worst combination of home-life I could be subjected to. I spend far too many early mornings just breathing deeply and gearing myself up to be subjected to the wall of Loud, Boisterous, Needing-My-Attention that is every minute when anyone else in the house is awake.

So what did my day off look like?

I helped get the kids ready to go and did some morning chores. I'd been up at 4:30 AM so I also had already social media'd and studied. Then, while my wife finished the preparations, I started work, and I worked from about 8 am to about 4 pm, straight. I didn't get hungry so didn't bother stopping for lunch. No one interrupted me, no one asked me to look at anything they'd built, no one broke my concentration, no sounds could be heard except those I'd chosen myself.

I'd been out the day before at a local shopping street and listened closely to the things the kids said they wanted, so at 4 I grabbed a couple orders I needed to ship for work and drove to our local downtown, dropped the orders in a post box, then went back to the shops and did some Christmas shopping in the 45 minutes or so before everything closed. I think I'm basically done with what we'll get them - other bigger things will be left to grand parents - so that's a load off, I literally had a stress dream earlier this week about it being 12/24 and having forgotten to do the shopping and having to go to (oh horrors) the mall on the day before Christmas. (Reminder: I'm a Jewish atheist. It's just virtually impossible not to Holiday in the Culturally Christian Hellscape that is the US. Also, my wife is Christian. So.) Found something cute for my wife, too, even tho I already know the main thing I'm getting her. Then, I realized - one of my favorite restaurants is on that block. So. I went there. I sat by myself at a table, only the indistinct restaurant hubbub around me. I read four or five chapters of my book, and ate a savory crepe, and drank lovely fruit tea, and got a scone to-go that I'll eat for lunch today. It was more than I probably should have spent on myself - about $25, including tip - but fuck it. I only get maybe a handful of days off all year, and I'm allowed to indulge a little.

Then I came home. There were no lights on. There was no noise. I had considered doing some more merch work while watching TV on the actual television (my kids are too young for subtitled shows, so usually if I want to watch My Shows I either have to do it on my computer when they're not around, or put them on and read all the subtitles aloud while trying to keep up and process the actual meaning of what I'm reading). But when I got back, the quiet and dark was so goddamn NICE that instead I curled up on the couch and read more of my book. I did that until bedtime - still about 8:15, because I'm exhausted. Then...I went to bed. And I slept long and deep, knowing that there was no chance I'd be interrupted and woken up, I didn't have to be, even in sleep, alert to every noise and possibility that I'd be needed.

I'm still exhausted and burned out, but even one night to myself felt really, really nice.

Saying "Tumblr does X" as a universal statement is doomed to failure, but generally speaking, the parenting posts I see on Tumblr, the ones with tens or hundreds of thousands of notes, speak what's apparently widely seen as a truism on here: that unless someone wants to spend 24/7 with their kids, to be 100% emotionally available at all times, is always kind and patient and perfect, they are a bad parent, maybe even abusive. I remember when covid started, there were multiple posts actively mocking the "oh god, my kids are now home all the time, how am I supposed to do this?" attitude that a lot of parents posted in despair. WhY dId YoU hAvE kIdS iF yOu DoN't WaNt To SpEnD tImE wItH tHeM?

Look at what my usual day looks like.

Look at what my day off looked like.

Do you really think I don't want to spend time with my kids? Do you really think I don't love my kids?

But I'm not a fucking MACHINE. I'm a PERSON. That's what people on Tumblr seem to forget. PARENTS ARE PEOPLE. The same tumblrinas who post ~uwu be kind to yourself rest if you need to, you should forgive yourself for that mistake you made~ will turn around, with zero sense of irony, and post "you're a bad parent if you ever raise your voice around a child."

Expecting parents to be perfect means expecting parents to be inhuman. It also means that a parent can't be poor (can't spend all your time being the perfect parent if you have to work multiple jobs or weird hours!), can't be introverted (can't be a perfect parent if you're not completely emotional available, god forbid socializing is exhausting for you), can't be on the ADHD or autism spectrum (what do you mean you forgot to get your kid to a doctor's appointment once? what do you mean over-stimulation can make you angry? how dare you get angry at a kid!), can't be depressed (gotta get out of bed every single day, gotta always be upbeat, patient, happy, or else that's Evil), can't be (like my wife) physically disabled (what do you mean your hands hurt too much to hold a child's hand? are you denying them touch?? CRUEL). And when the only answer you can offer to that is, "if you can't be that perfect you shouldn't be a parent," then you're saying people who aren't middle class to wealthy, people who aren't neurotypical, people who aren't physically able, shouldn't have children.

And honestly...what the fuck is your problem?

I'm not perfect. I tell my kids to just leave me alone sometimes. I raise my voice, especially when one of my kids starts punching the other, but also sometimes just cause I'm exhausted and Can't Anymore. I've forgotten an appointment by accident and felt like a total fucking idiot, and I've skipped an after school activity because I just wasn't up for taking them. I've served them more unbalanced, unhealthy meals than I can count. I've made many, many mistakes, but I've also done my best, and I love my kids, and I hope that when they grow up, they'll still love me even as they recognize that I wasn't perfect, just as I've come to accept my own parents' short-comings while still loving them very much. They're people, too, and the older I get, the more I understand where they were coming from.

When I fuck up, I apologize.

When they tell me they're unhappy with something I've done, I apologize, and I try to do better. Sometimes I even succeed.

This shit is hard, yo. And it's getting harder every year.

I'm BEGGING Tumblr: you need to start seeing parents as people. The way y'all talk about parenting on here is toxic, and genuinely harmful, and frankly exhausting. You have no idea what the reality of raising kids is like, and you need to shut the entire fuck up.

I had a day off yesterday.

I might get one more before the end of 2023.

I already can't wait. I am so, so, so tired. sigh

(if you actually read this whole rant and even a single word of it resonated for you, please reblog it. I'm tired of never seeing positive posts about parenting while I see negative ones with a bajillion notes.)

[ofmdrecaps]

08/03-04/2024 Weekend OFMD Recap

TLDR; David Jenkins; Rhys Darby; Taika Waititi; Samba Schutte; Ruibo Qian; Rachel House Dominic Burgess; Nathan Foad; Articles; Fan Spotlight; OFMD Colouring Pages; Our Flag Means Fanfiction; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Today's Taika

Okay yall, I ended up being up all night for days with a grumpy kiddo so I am yet again behind, I'm really sorry. Here's the weekend recap. Aug 5 will go out tonight if I have to chug espresso for the next 4 hours!

== David Jenkins ==

Source: David Jenkins Twitter

== Rhys Darby ==

Our Captain is out in Edinburgh Scotland! Doing his Live Cryptid Factor show with Dan Scheiber and Buttons!

Lots of short videos on his Instagram Stories:

The Cryptid Factor Live - Edinburgh - Buttons CraftTime

The Cryptid Factor Live in Edinburgh - Dan's Book

The Cryptid Factor Live In Edinburgh - The Crypid Factor

The Cryptid Factor Live In Edinburgh - The Caves

Source: Rhys Darby's Instagram

Source: petrichorpond On Twitter (per @mon-ster-chen's Post)

= Astras TV Awards Nominee =

Rhys has been Nominated for BEST ACTOR in a Streaming Comedy Series in the Astra TV Awards! The TV Awards ill be held on Aug 18th so keep your eyes peeled around then!

Source: Hollywood Creative Alliance Instagram

== Taika Waititi ==

Happy Wedding Anniversary to Taika and Rita! (Aug 4th 2022). They were caught smooching out in London recently <3

Source: Instagram

== Samba Schutte ==

No context, but Samba called it "Man in the Mirror"

Source: Samba Schutte's Instagram

== Nathan Foad ==

Nathan's weekly Saturday Celebration

Source: Nathan Foad's Instagram Stories

= Ruibo Qian =

Just some stills from the Ms. Holmes/Ms. Watson BTS I wanted to include cause they're adorable.

Source: OldGlobe's BTS Video

= Rachel House =

So these are a week old but I found them via a more recent post from someone else there, so putting them in today! Rachel out with friends <3

Source: Instagram

= Dominic Burgess =

Dominic sending us goodnight cat pictures. What a guy <3

Source: Dominic Burgess' Twitter

== Articles ==

Thank you to @adoptourcrew for highlighting this article!

https://telltaletv.com/2024/03/20-iconic-queer-and-trans-characters-of-color-on-tv/

Source: Adopt Our Crew Twitter

https://screenrant.com/tv-shows-always-recommend-good-regardless-genre/

Source: Adopt Our Crew Twitter

== Fan Spotlight ==

= OFMD Colouring Pages =

Another set of colouring pages from our fab friend @patchworkpiratebear - I love that we're getting multiple versions each time now! These are super cool!

Source: PatchworkPirateBears Tumblr: Teacups / Flag

= Our Flag Means Fanfiction =

Another episode of the Omegaverse! This time hosted by Tessa! Check them out on your favorite listening platforms here!

Source: Our Flag Means Fanfiction Instagram

== Love Notes ==

Hey Lovelies!!! Found this really adorable artist this weekend and I thought I'd share them with you because they really express a lot of things that I tend to think--- like how much I love you all, seriously, did you know you're fucking FANTASTIC?? and fucking BRILLIANT AND AMAZING AND TALENTED!?

Whenever I'm stuck doing work, or other family/life stuff, I always come back to thinking about this awesome fandom, and how much I miss talking too you all and how much I love all the crazy stuff you all get up to every day! I haven't been interacting as much because it's really hard for me to focus with so much going on (yay neurodivergence!)-- but please know I'm watching and laughing, and crying and smiling, and wishing you all the best and cheering you on! Hope the end of the weekend and beginning of the week is treating you wonderfully <3 Take care lovelies!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by James (@sunlightafterdark)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by James (@sunlightafterdark)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by James (@sunlightafterdark)

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika ==

Just needing some of the Cinnamon Sugar, Salt and Pepper boys smiling together for this one <3 Gifs courtesy of more of our gif-masters @eddie-redcliffe and @thunderwingdoomslayer!

[tavyliasin]

The Doors to the House of Hopeful Sinners are OPEN

Hello darlings~ The doors to my experimental server are now opening, following the success of the experiment~ (I know the banner isn't particularly original yet but we're open to submissions to replace it!)

The House of Hopeful Sinners is an open and inclusive 18+ FanServer for Baldur's Gate 3, with a focus on creative fanworks and supporting fellow fan creators!

To learn more about the server and what we hope to create together, please Read More below! (NSFW Content and Humour Follow)

HOHS Server Principles

A general summary of the server is that it is a space to allow creativity to flourish. We are LGBTQIA+ and NeuroDivergent Friendly, our motto is something along the lines of "Horny But Wholesome", or "Spicy Kindness". Do be aware we do not currently spoiler mark any storylines, endings, or game details, so you may wish to finish everything in the game unless you're fine with spoilers. Some of what we have to offer:

Almost all channels are NSFW, hornyposting 24/7 is free for all to enjoy if you so wish. No judgement! BE FREE!

Dedicated forums for FanArt and FanFiction, so you can share and search for your own works or those by others.

Forums for reference materials and lore discussion to use for fanworks.

Optional ping roles to be alerted to new content with your favourite characters!

Starboard including NSFW Channels!

Specific channels and threads for discussing niche and triggering kinks where those who enjoy them can engage safely.

Clear list of CWs and rules to tag and spoiler hide content containing potentially triggering content.

Voice Channels to stream games, art, or just chill with your fellow sinners.

A selection of custom emojis, stickers, and soundboards!

A community who will welcome you whether you only drop by a little or visit often. Lurkers welcome~ Enjoy the space however you wish.

Space to grow! We are more than willing to hear feedback and build our space around the needs of the community.

Simple age verification. Open a ticket to verbally confirm your age with a moderator, no photo ID needed. This is trust, and breaking it is an immediate lifetime ban. Having under 18s around is not safe for minors or for the adults. If you're too young, please respect this and wait. We will never knowingly allow a minor into this space.

Bots for AO3 link summaries and image/video embeds from Twitter, Tiktok, Instagram, etc

Writing Sprint Channel and bot to write alongside friends and spur each other on!

Server Reviews!

You don't just have to take my word from it, listen to these reviews from satisfied community members!

1/5 stars. "Not enough Raphael." - A. Devilyoudo 5/5 stars. "Like 24/7 Horny Jail, now with a token SFW channel!" - I.C.U. Peekin 3/5 stars. "Server owner clearly needs more sleep." - B.D. Thyme 5/5 stars. "Finally, a place where I have threads for less common kinks!" - I.P. Freely 3/5 stars. "The creative energy gave me kinks I didn't know I had so now I have that to deal with." - Sweet E Pye 5/5 stars. "Everyone is so feral I'm making a fortune." Mr Phucks, Cage Chewer Dentistry 0/5 stars. "These degenerates have changed my brain chemistry and all I can think of is eating Gortass." - Tsun Derriere 5/5 stars. "I've accidentally become the Fairy Smutmother to a bunch of brats and couldn't be happier." - Tavylia of House Sin, first of her na- (script cuts off) 3/5 stars. "A good selection of smut content but I'm too scared to talk to everyone." - Lou King (respectfully) 2/5 stars. “I’ve seen less horny pornography. I had to turn off my message previews so I didn’t give my coworkers hypernatremia at the sheer volume of cum present.” - Michael Toris 5/5 Stars. “I think I’m growing a prostate where my frontal lobe used to be. Think Durge is into skullfucking?” - Illa D. Vized 5/5 stars. "A full range of penis emojis." - Forrest F. Cox 5/5 stars "There's a reason I'm here every day" - Leonardo DaVinci 5/5 stars. "I have learned things about prostates, cervical mucus, and fertility my health class never bothered with and there are big enough nerds here that there are NIH citations about it." - Prof G Dekarios

What Else is there in HOHS? Beta Readers

We have dedicated Beta Readers on a tag role - we would welcome more Beta Readers to help polish up our writers' works, though of course time is freely given and boundaries/CWs are always respected. You are under no pressure to beta. But what can that feedback look like? How does it help?

Editing is painful, but having useful feedback alongside fun and excited comments is a great way to make it a lot less horrible!

Treatos! WIP Feedback!

Sometimes to get things flowing we like to write "Treatos" - short paragraphs/drabbles not connected to full fics to help us get the creative mode moving again.

Most of all, we just welcome all Hopeful Sinners who share our values in fandom enjoyment~ I hope to see you there! - With Love, Tavylia Sin

Disclaimer - side effects of exposure to HOHS might include: - Gender Euphoria - Producing more creative works - Persistent feelings of self-worth - Hyperfixation go brr - Interest in characters you didn't look twice at before - Excessive Thirst

[genderqueerdykes]

the issues of transness, poverty and homelessness cannot be separated. while many of us find gainful employment or stable income, have good social networks, and do not find themselves struggling with housing, the vast majority of us struggle with several, or all 3. it's not for lack of wanting or trying.

many of us try to find work, but are turned away due to our transness. either because we demand to be referred to by our correct names and pronouns, or because our hormones, voices, and bodies make certain people turn us away immediately because we are not "professional" in their eyes. binary trans men and women face this struggle just as much as nonbinary people- the issue hits us all- no matter what, they will find something "unprofessional' about us, or, if we are employed, refuse to respect our identities and grind us into paste and force us to quit.

many of us struggle with having stable social networks due to our identities- while a lot of people have family and friends to fall back on, it can be very easy for a trans person to lose most or all of their friends and/or family after coming out, and struggle to find a shoulder to lean on when hard times hit. sometimes we also struggle to gain access to therapy and mental health services as well, due to our identities, and if we are mentally ill or neurodivergent, suddenly our ability to tell if we are trans or not gets called into question, further damaging our mental well being.

housing is a nightmare or impossible when the other two fail. it is very hard to find a couch to sleep on when everyone you know has turned away. it is hard to make ends meet and pay rent when every place you try to find employment in will not accept you not matter how hard you try to pass either way. often times the only other people we know are also homeless, struggling with housing, or are living in overcrowded conditions themselves.

the issue is systemic- it is not the trans person's fault for not trying hard enough. the cards are stacked against us and these things wear you down. it's not your fault for not trying hard enough, these are just the lives we lead- not for lack of trying, but because this is where we're forced to be.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my friend I thought he was autistic and making him cry?

I (25F) have been casual friends with "M" (25M) for several years. We're not super close friends (or at least, I'm not super close to him, I suspect he is more emotionally invested in our friendship than me. Also, according to several classmates back in college, he had a crush on me. Idk, but seems possible based on his actions. I'm gay and now have a gf, he's always been very chill and respectful about any feelings he may or may not have). Honestly, our interests, energy levels, and socializing preferences are not super compatible, but he's a good person, and we've stayed in touch after college, occasionally meeting up every few months for a hike.

For the last 5 years, I assumed he was autistic. I am also autistic (got diagnosed in my teens) and noticed a ton of autistic/neurodivergent traits as soon as I met M. TBH that's one of the big reasons we became and stayed friends, we may not be 100% compatible as friends/people but neither of us have to climb over all the neurotypical social rules and stigmas just to hang out. I've talked about my experiences with autism with him, in a commiserating/companion-type way, and we both talked about our very different childhood experiences with speech therapy and special ed.

Anyways, I had casually told my gf and mom that M's autistic (my mom got diagnosed with autism a few years ago, after I did, and my gf recently got diagnosed after both of us recognized she had similar autistic traits as me). M visited me 2 or 3 months ago and we went hiking, like usual. Afterwards, we were hanging out at my house (I live with my parents, my job's close and there's few apartments here) and M was talking about how he got fired from his job a few months ago, and was having trouble finding a new job. He was about to leave, and I left for a few min. When I came back my mom was telling M about how he should talk with HR at any future job about his autism because he was probably fired in large part due to ableism (I agree ableism played a role in his firing, probably because his bosses were shit at actually communicating and assumed everyone were mind readers). M was pretty obviously uncomfortable, and my mom is not tactful or very sensitive, so I intervened and we left.

The two of us talked for a few min. It turned out that he is Not Autistic (or at least, not diagnosed). I told him the reason my mom thought he was autistic is because I assumed he was and told her. It turns out that he has a lot of shame and negative emotions about his time in speech therapy and special ed as a kid (he had always talked about it as though they were annoying, sometime unnecessary, sometimes helpful, so I didn't know this) and some internalized ableism directed at himself. I mostly talked about my experiences with autism and getting diagnosed, and emphasized that, although I thought he had autism/neurodivergence, I'm not an expert and not trying to tell him what he is, and also that autism (especially for me) is not a bad thing. It was awkward and uncomfy for both of us, and by the end M was visibly very upset. I apologized and let him go. Before he shut the garage door I heard him start to sob. A few hours later (he lives about 2 hrs away) I texted him to apologize and reiterate what I had said earlier. He said it was ok, but idk. We've texted some, and called once since this, but haven't seen each other yet.

You may judge me on any or all of the following (potential) dick moves:

assuming M was autistic without him actually telling me

telling 2 other people he was autistic without his permission or telling him

allowing mom to bring up a sensitive subject like this

how I handled the situation afterwards, including telling M I think he's autistic and talking about myself

any other asshole thing you may ID from this story

What are these acronyms?

[chemical-killjoy]

Here's a few reminders about the current heat wave in australia and global warming.

Things you may not know:

2023 is the world's hottest year on record, and 2024 is looking to be worse.

Heatwaves are Australia's deadliest natural hazard. Let that sink in. It's not fires. We all know how devastating those are. It's not floods either. It's heat waves. It's not just a little heat, it's a hazard.

With the cost of living and inflation currently happening, a lot of people are rationing air conditioning or can't afford any. This puts more people at risk

It's not just the heat, but the humidity with it that adds to the danger

If you live in a suburban area, you are more at risk, as the concrete and lack of trees traps in the heat

The La Nina (sorry my laptop won't let me do the tilde) years we're going through are now hotter than El Nino years 50 years ago.

Risks with the heat wave and temperature rise in general:

Heat stroke can make you quite nauseous, so you may not be eating enough, making it harder for your body to look after itself.

There's such a thing as over-hydration and it can be just as serious as dehydration

With hotter nights it's harder to sleep - another thing effecting how well your body can handle things and cope

A cold beer can sound soothing, but alcohol warms you up, as well as dehydrating you, and causing lower blood sugar; keep this in mind as you enjoy, make sure you get plenty of water as being dehydrated with this shit is... let's say, subpar.

Heat exhaustion is real, no one is able to think lightning quick with the brain fog that comes with this heat. That means if you're not fully with it, things like driving become more dangerous

If you can't cool down within 30 minutes when you have heat exhaustion, or worse, heat stroke, it can become deadly

If you have a mental health disorder (and if you're on tumblr, chances are you're either neurodivergent, lgbt+, mentally ill or a funky mix) the heat literally changes your mood and exacerbates things. This has been linked to an increase in suicides and attempts, please make sure you have a support network in place, as if things are hard, call Lifeline on 13 11 14, or 000.

There is a point where sweating doesn't help as the hair is saturated/there's high humidity and the sweat cannot evaporate, therefore not cooling you down

The heat can kill, the link at the bottom of the page tells you how

Safety tips:

YOU ARE NOT STRONGER THAN THE FUCKIN SUN!!! Please make sure you are wearing sunscreen if you have to be outside or even near a window. Sunburn and cancer aren't funny, it's painful and deadly.

Drink plenty of water. No one cares if you look uncool carrying around a water bottle, because they either are as well, or are putting themselves at risk. If you're putting a bottle of water in the freezer for the next day, make sure you have non-frozen water to drink straight away

Seek shade as much as possible, even if it's carrying a small umbrella with you, or literally just a cap. Anything is better than nothing. This includes sunnies.

Cold baths and showers. I don't care that they're not pleasant, they can save you. If you have heat stroke, one of the best things to do is to have a luke-warm bath (as this temperature will likely already be painful - I saw my sister go through it) and make it colder to cool yourself down SLOWLY (but really, best advice is to call the doctor, 000, or go to the hospital)

Keep an eye on your body temperature if you can. If it gets over 41'C, your body begins to basically cook itself inside out

If money is an issue and you have a working air conditioner, set it to a higher temperature and turn on a fan. This will make the air feel cooler while saving money

If you don't have an aircon, here's a link on how to create a makeshift one

Alternatively, take turns with your mates going to each others houses to all be in an air conditioned room, while saving money of not having your aircon on everyday.

Aloe Vera at night when you're sunburnt will help ease the pain and cool you down. Also things like using mint body wash will make you feel cooler

I know we're all sweaty but do NOT overdo it with the deodorant. It will clog up your pores, you won't be able to sweat... this is bad

Take a break from exercising; your body will not start to deteriorate muscle until about 3 weeks of not using said muscle passes (I learnt this from my physio). If you're struggling with the idea of not exercising for a while, you might be struggling with over-exercising or an eating disorder - please think this over and consult a doctor.If you need to continue exercise for medical reasons: make sure you are in a cool area, hydrated, have time to cool down after your workout, and do NOT attempt anything too intense. No HIIT or anything high intensity. Aim for things like yoga or pilates (it's not just for women!!!)

You can buy hand held misting fans from kmart for $5 (these really work... I was at a concert in 41'C heat and the lady next to me had one... it helped so much)

Now is not the time for body insecurity, you are fucking gorgeous, I swear, just put the fucking crop top and shorts on or go topless if you can. It's too hot for insecurity

Make sure you've got a good fly screen and leave your doors/windows open but locked over night to keep you cooler. If you don't have a fly screen, try putting a mesh curtain over the door/window.

Silk sheets are not a good plan, you want cotton for absorbancy

Stop having hot meals. You need something cooler, no one gives a shit if you're having weetbix for dinner if you're not dying from your body temperature rising!! It's already gonna rise from the energy expenditure of digestions! So just eat something cool, ok? And make sure you're getting enough carbs, they're not evil, they keep your brain functioning, and you need that extra help with the heat fog brain.

Last of all don't be afraid to call 000 or your country's emergency/crisis number. Thanks for reading and stay safe!

Here's the link to where I got most the info, feel free to add more info to this!!!

[bratzforchris]

hi! I love your writing so much :) I was wondering if you could do a neurodivergent!luke x reader who struggles with ocd? (Specifically checking ocd e.g checking locks, taps etc and intrusive thoughts). I was hoping it could maybe be a little angsty but ultimately romantic/fluffy and like they’re both helping each other/supporting one another. Not sure what to suggest specifically happens - hope that’s not too vage! Thank you x :)

If We Have Each Other

❃

Summary: Above

Pairing: Neurodivergent!Luke x neurodivergent and fem!reader

Warnings: OCD tendencies, minor arguing, autistic meltdown

Word Count: 1185

A/N: Thank you for the request! I do not have OCD myself, so I'm not 100% sure if the following work is fully correct. Please educate me if it isn't! Also, OCD falls under the neurodivergent umbrella :)

❃

“Y/N, come back to bed.” Luke mumbled sleepily, pulling the comforter up to his nose. 

“I just need to check that I turned the stove off and locked the doors,” You told him, standing up and wrapping your robe around yourself. “I’ll be right back.” 

“It’s bedtime, Y/N,” Luke said bluntly. “It’s 11:30, that means we're going to sleep.”

You frowned softly, kissing Luke’s head. You knew being autistic made Luke take things literally and also made him want to follow a strict routine. Having OCD unfortunately made it hard for you to sleep. You knew in your heart that you had turned the stove off and locked the doors, but your mind was telling you to check just one more time to be safe. 

You quickly hurried down the stairs and checked the stove. It was off, but you still tapped the gas knob five times to be safe. You then went around the house checking all the locks on the doors and the windows. You tapped each lock five times to make sure it was absolutely straight. You were checking the back door when you heard Luke creep down the stairs.

“Y/N, it’s time to go to sleep,” he insisted, playing with the zipper on his footie pajamas to stim. “We said bedtime is 11:30.”

“I’m coming, Luke,” You sighed. “Just go up and wait.”

“Y/N, the doors are locked and the stove is off, I promise. You’re fine. Stop being silly.” he huffed. 

Your face dropped when you heard what Luke said. You knew your OCD was irrational, but it hurt to hear that coming from Luke. He was always your rock, but now you were worrying that he had finally said what he actually thought. 

“Y/N, I…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that!” Luke began to flap his wrists, trying to shake the awful feelings from his body. “It’s not silly, I promise.” 

“I think I’ll sleep in the guest room tonight. Go ahead and go to sleep.” You said, your voice cracking. 

You turned and walked up the stairs with your back to Luke so that he wouldn’t see you cry. You made a beeline for the guest room, completely disregarding the master suite. Once you had closed and locked the door, you leaned back against it and sunk to your knees, sobbing softly. All of your previous boyfriends had left you because of your OCD and now you were sure Luke felt the same way. 

After a few minutes, you slowly slid into the bed, pulling the covers up to your chest. You slowly began to calm down as you cried out all of your feelings, but you couldn’t help but to notice how empty and cold the bed felt without Luke beside you. 

Little did you know, Luke was also having an emotional moment. He was laid in your shared bed, sobbing into Petunia’s fur as he held her close to his chest. The blond couldn’t stop the thoughts that wandered into his mind; how being autistic made the things he said come out wrong, how his struggle with empathy affected his relationships, that funny thought that he was always going to be different. 

He hadn’t meant to hurt you. You were his person. Ever since you had started dating two years ago, Luke’s life had improved significantly. He no longer had to handle his meltdowns alone, and he felt like he had someone who understood him on a spiritual level. Now though, the blond couldn’t help the current meltdown he was having. He was angrily pulling on his hair as tears came to his eyes. These were the times where he hated being autistic. Luke knew you couldn’t help your OCD and that checking things helped you feel calmer. He hadn’t meant for you to think that he didn’t care about your fears or your worries. 

The night passed slowly for both of you. You eventually fell into a fitful sleep in the guest room, but Luke laid awake the entire night, running through how on earth he would ever make this up to you. He knew you weren’t just going to forgive him. After all, the way the words had come out of his mouth made it sound like he was calling your legitimate problems silly. 

As soon as the sun rose, Luke bustled down to the kitchen with Petunia nipping at his heels trying his hardest to be quiet. Your favorite breakfast probably wouldn’t immediately make you forgive him, but it would be a step in the right direction. The blue-eyed boy was absolutely terrible at cooking, mostly because he got distracted and left the stove on, so he opted to order some takeout from your favorite diner. 

He smiled as he set a fresh pot of coffee to brew and sat down at the table with a few of his fidget toys. He was feeling better than he had last night , and he was ready to deliver a romance-movie-worthy apology to you. Thirty minutes later, the food arrived and Luke set the table with your favorite French toast, a cup of coffee for you, and fidget toys by your plate. Being autistic, sharing his toys and “penguin pebbling” with you was his way of showing love. 

Before long, you walked downstairs, sleepily rubbing your eyes. The house was rather silent, so you almost assumed Luke had left in the middle of the night, probably to Ashton or Michael’s house. All that changed though, when you saw him sitting at the breakfast table with a huge smile on his face. 

“Good morning, Y/N.” he smiled softly, trying to be careful with the pet names. 

“What’s all this?” You asked skeptically. 

“Y/N, I’m sorry,” Luke started. “The way I talked to you last night wasn’t okay. Your OCD, or any of your fears or worries for that matter, are not silly. I never intended for what I said to come out that way, but that’s not an excuse. Will you forgive me?” he asked shyly. 

“Luke, you have to understand how I’m feeling. I don’t want to say ‘put up with’ cause that’s not right, but I have never called any of the things that come along with you being autistic silly.” You stated. 

“I understand that and I’m sorry,” tears began to well in Luke’s eyes. “You have made my life so much better and I am so thankful for you. I will do better, I promise.”

When Luke looked at you so solemnly like that, every bit of tension and anger you had faded away. You knew you wanted this man forever and ever and nothing was going to stop that. Sure, life was harder for you as a neurodivergent couple, but there was nothing you couldn’t accomplish as long as you had each other. 

“I forgive you, Luke,” You said, pulling him into a deep kiss. “Now, let’s eat before this gets cold.”

Luke laughed, encouraging you to eat on, smiling as he realized he really did have the girl of his dreams. 

[cookinguptales]

you know, when I was like... maybe 7ish we had a pizza party at school. they had 2-liters of coke for us, but I remember crying because I wanted diet coke. and all the teachers were like ??? because it's not typical, I'll admit, for kids to want diet drinks. and I was asked, y'know, am I diabetic? do I have blood sugar problems?

no and no.

my dad has trouble digesting sugary drinks. I was never banned from them, I just didn't have the opportunity to drink them often. we only had diet drinks and juice in my house. (and even juice wasn't my favorite.)

so I didn't like coke. it tasted far too sweet to me. it was unpleasant. I wanted a diet coke. and I cried because everyone else had a special-occasion drink they liked but I had to drink coke, which was so unpleasant, until a teacher took pity on me (or got irritated) and got me a can of diet coke from the break room.

and, y'know... for years, I felt embarrassed about throwing a fit about that damn drink. oh, I should have just shut up and drank the coke, or maybe just gone without a drink. it's so embarrassing the way I cried over everything as a child. (and I do mean everything.)

but I understand these days that I was dealing with a fairly traumatic home life (that I constantly tried to tell the adults in my life about, but who told me I was overreacting) as well as being neurodivergent. I understand things like sensory issues and RSD now. I get why everything always felt so overwhelming at that age, why everything felt like it was the end of the world and why I felt like everyone would hate me for every perceived infraction.

what I understand better, though, is that I also cannot digest sugary drinks. it turned out to be something I inherited from my dad. my father and I aren't diabetic or anything; we've been tested many times. we just... don't handle sugar well. and I hadn't been exposed to a lot of sugar back then, but I knew when I had really sugary things, especially in liquid form, I didn't like it. I didn't like the way it tasted and I didn't like the way it made me feel.

we didn't know that I had an actual medical issue back then, or that I probably should have always had low-sugar snacks on hand. that they should have had a diet coke for me from the beginning.

but we knew that I didn't want to drink that soda.

idk, I just... as a kid, I always felt so ashamed of this episode. like I was being purposefully manipulative to get what I wanted. but as an adult, I have a lot more patience and understanding. I hate that we don't just listen to kids. they don't always have the experience to tell us why something is bothering them, but they know that something is bothering them.

I'm thinking now about how long it took me to get diagnosed with my multiple chronic illnesses, and how part of what took so long was the fact that many doctors didn't take me seriously. several of them told my parents they should be taking me to a therapist, not a medical doctor. they thought I was just a kid acting out.

idk. idk. this isn't like... a full meta post or a well-thought-out post about disability or anything, but just... I'm thinking about how from birth, we're taught to ignore what our body is telling us. (especially if we're AFAB.) I'm thinking about how raising a fuss while trying to take care of that body is something that'll get you shamed.

I'm thinking about how sick I got every time I drank juice at breakfast, and how none of that was necessary.

going to school with my spine partially dislocated wasn't necessary. fainting between classes wasn't necessary. hell, going to school with bruises and bites and scratch marks all over my body wasn't necessary.

idk. I don't want kids. for a lot of reasons, really. but sometimes I want to take care of them just so I can listen to them as they learn what their body is telling them and spare them any unnecessary harm I can. :(